#i am a genuine introvert and will not speak unless spoken to
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chrollogy · 1 month ago
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worse thing you can do to me is mischaracterise me because what do you mean you see me as ‘someone who thinks she’s better than everyone else’ just because i don’t talk that much 😀
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eternalwritess · 4 months ago
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Hiya! I'd like to request a matchup for Hazbin Hotel, if that's alright. :)
Basics: My name's Sébastian. I'm a male (I am trans if that's important) and I'm bisexual. I wouldn't like to be paired with Alastor, Lucifer or Carmilla, if that's possible.
Personality: I'm an INFJ, though I do come across as an extrovert in online spaces. I'm typically very introverted, but when I'm around people I care about I get rather loud and obnoxious due to a fear of being ignored. I don't put myself out there as a smart person, but I was always very high up academically. I have a tendency to write or speak in a way that could be considered robotic. People have told me I'm really funny before, which I doubt. I constantly struggle to show those I love how much I care about them, and often resort to excessively love-bombing people. A lot of this is due to the fact I don't think about people unless I'm actually talking to or texting them, as I get extremely focused on other things. I often get called narcissistic by people because of it. The majority of my jokes involve innuendos or things like cannibalism, but my comedic timing is what others tend to enjoy. I get easily overwhelmed though, so there have been numerous times where I've just gone silent in a conversation. I struggle to navigate social situations, but thankfully I'm very good at articulating myself around normal people.
I'm autistic and have anxiety, which impacts a lot of my thinking and relationships.
Interests: Funnily enough, my main interest is in fashion, but I never have anyone to discuss it with due to my friends not being interested in it. My friends and family always come to me for fashion advice, though. I'm an emo, but I often dress in other styles to fit the mood or vibes. Other interests of mine include the skeletal system, nuclear energy and chemical warfare; an odd selection, I know. Hobbies of mine include: organisation, writing, drawing, crocheting and designing clothing. I'm currently learning German. My music taste is all over the place but I mainly listen to: My Chemical Romance, Waterparks, Melanie Martinez & Queen.
Love languages: I often give extravagant gifts to those I love. Another of my love languages is physical touch, I only touch those I really feel comfortable with though. I enjoy receiving pretty much any form of affection except for words of affirmation. I don't find spoken words genuine, it's a weird thing.
My type in a partner: I need to be with someone who is alright with me spoiling them spontaneously. I also would prefer someone who can be patient with me when I need it or will leave me be when I'm overwhelmed. I don't want someone who's talking all the time, I would appreciate constant texting over speaking to me a lot. I don't have many physical preferences, except for not wanting anyone who has severe health issues (mental or physical) because I have issues maintaining myself and wouldn't be capable of managing a whole other person.
What I look like: I have short brown hair. I'm below average height. I'm skinny, but I have muscular legs due to running and walking frequently. I have large blue eyes.
Extra: I run above average when it comes to temperature, so friends use me to warm up if they're cold. I also have a naturally lower resting heart rate than the average person.
(Hope that's enough info for you <3. Have a good day/night!)
𝕐𝕠𝕦 𝕙𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕓𝕖𝕖𝕟 𝕞𝕒𝕥𝕔𝕙𝕖𝕕 𝕨𝕚𝕥𝕙…
𝓥𝓪𝓰𝓰𝓲𝓮!
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You most likely met Vaggie either at the hotel or at a group of people. Most likely some sort of fight in hell etc.
She would constantly guide you around the hotel making sure that you felt safe etc.
If you ever made dark jokes around her she wouldn't care for the most part and would likely laugh as I see her as a dark humor type of person. She would probably even add onto the joke
Although if you ever mentioned the exterminations she would get somewhat closed off between you two and would seem cold, she would tell you that it wasn't your fault though and that it was her own stuff
"Don't worry about it... its my own bullshit, not your fault,"
You and her both likely suck at social situations and aren't very good at them overall she tries to avoid them every now and then you'll both go yo an event and don't often talk to people
Every now and then you might go up to someone to strike a conversation and she'll be right by your side, a bit like a guard dog but she'll be there
She may be a little overprotective of you and try to protect you a little too much, but seeing how you don't want to be lonely she'll probably open up a bit more trying to let down her guard a bit more for your sake
This is also because... lets be honest she's a little self conscious about your relationship and thinks that she's not good enough at times
"I'm... sorry about being overprotective, its just something about me I guess... guess you could say its in my blood or something"
That being said, while you requested someone without issues she does have some but they don't affect her too much. She has some guilt from the exterminations but doesn't let that get in your or her way
Every now and then she'll get a bit down thinking about the exterminations but can shove that aside. (Also almost everyone in this show is traumatized asf and the ones who aren't dont exactly suit some things you're looking for so she's the best i got, sorry-)
She'd totally take an interest in all of your interests and probably would know a bit too much about them-...
I think that she might take up crocheting with you, something to help calm her down and all. Although she'd be horrible at it
"I don't think I did this one right... mind helping me?"
I think Vaggie would love physical touch, an arm around your shoulder, waist, holding your hand etc.
Vaggie also doesn't talk too much and would be fine with just sitting in silence with you or hell even texting
While she might be a slightly dry texter she's texts a lot and fast, never leaving you on read
She would cuddle with you all of the time <3
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Hello !! I’d love to request a matchup for mha, pjo, & haikyuu <3
- I use any pronouns & identify as genderqueer
- I am polyamorous, queer, and on the aromantic spectrum. I don’t really experience romantic attraction but I’d be with someone of any gender. For me, I’m just happy being close to those I love whether it’s in a romantic or platonic context. I also enjoy typically romantic stuff like dates and all that :^)
- I am a Gemini & INFP (I think ?)
- I am 5’10, pale, lanky & built like a cereal box. I have freckles and dark circles under my eyes. My hair & eyes are both dark brown, my hair being streaked with white and usually kept down & cut sort of in a shag around my shoulders. I also have a nose that’s kinda big with a bump. I’m almost always wearing glasses & have a wardrobe of long flowy skirts, cute grandma sweaters, graphic t shirts, & fun socks.
- I’ve been told that at first glance I’m a very shy and closed off person, sometimes coming off as cold & like I hate everyone. I’m naturally awkward & socially anxious whenever I’m around people I don’t know well which makes me clam up and rarely speak unless spoken too in which case I’m still soft spoken. It can take a while for me to open up but over time I become a lot more talkative & outgoing around my loved ones. My personality is usually described as dorky, very kind to a fault, a little awkward, and a daydreamer. I would describe myself as very emotional, I’m a huge crybaby, a huge dork, introverted, friendly, and very giggly 24/7. I make a lot of bad dad jokes/puns & will laugh at basically anything. I love rambling about my interests & am very enthusiastic about it.
- I love reading & writing, I have my own worlds that I’ve created in my head and would love to share with anyone who’ll listen. I like reading fantasy & mythology, specifically Alaskan myths because I’m Alaskan. I play peaceful games like stardew valley & animal crossing. I also like sweet things, dnd, music, & animation.
- I dislike big social events & loud music because it overwhelms me. I also don’t like school since it does not work well with my anxiety, ADHD, and (probably) autism. Too much social interaction can tire me out and cause me to shut down & stop speaking until I can recharge.
- My hobbies include writing, drawing, skateboarding, jigsaw puzzles, & crochet.
- My love language is gift giving & time spent together !! I give my loved ones things I’ve made for them like stuffed animals, bracelets, or other art & will buy them snacks or something that reminded me of them. I like spending time with my loved whether we’re talking or just existing in comfortable silence.
I think I included everything I want to !! Thank you very much in advance <3 👾
Hi Anon! Thank you for your request! I hope you like your matchups!
In My Hero Academia, I match you with...
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You and Shoto are like the cold-at-first-glance-but-actually-really-nice couple of UA!
You're one of very few people who has heard Shoto genuinely laugh. I see him as someone who loves dad jokes so please tell them to him! He's going to have the best time.
Enjoys listening to you rant about your interests. He doesn't really say a whole lot but be rest assured he's listening attentively.
Similarly, he'd love listening to you talk about your fantasy worlds. He thinks you're very clever to be able to come up with such amazing things.
Shoto also doesn't particularly like loud noises or places so he'll help you avoid them if at all possible. He can't do much about the rest of 1A though. There's no one who can make them quiet down.
Please teach him how to crochet! He'd love to have those sort of skills and has been meaning to try knitting for ages so he'd also love crocheting.
Quality time is also Shoto's love language, so you'll be spending a lot of time together in comfortable silence. Whether you're reading, crocheting, or doing a puzzle together, he just loves your company.
In Percy Jackson, I match you with...
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The main man himself! Percy is the most supportive partner you could ever hope for.
Loves skating with you! Percy Jackson is definitely someone who knows some cool tricks on a skateboard and he'd love to have staking dates with you.
Definitely wants to train with you. The best way to make sure you can defend yourself, demigod or not, is to see for himself how strong you are.
Always wears the bracelets you've given him. Yes, he knows he's wearing seven bracelets on one arm. So what?
Another one who loves listening to you ramble about your fantasy worlds. He can't believe you can come up with such creative things when you already deal with all of Greek mythology on a near daily basis.
Super respectful of your dislikes. The minute you walk into a noisy environment, he's scanning to see where a quiet spot is and as soon as he sees you starting to shut down, he's gently pulling you over there for a break.
He'll stay there with you as long as you need, wrapping an arm around you and sitting in comfortable silence.
In Haikyuu, I match you with...
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Hinata would love to teach you how to play volleyball. But only if you can teach him skateboarding!
Please teach him skateboarding. But make sure he's wearing a helmet and guards on his knees, elbows, hands...basically everywhere.
He's going to fall over a lot until he gets the hang of it (and still a fair bit after than as well) but he's loving every minute of it.
Keeps everything you've ever given him. Whether he's wearing your bracelets or hanging a crocheted keychain from his volleyball bag, Hinata likes the little reminders of you.
Loves listening to you ramble. And loves rambling to you as well. No one else can get a word in sideways when you're both in the zone.
He can be pretty loud but he'll always try to be more mindful when you're around. He's told you a few times that if he's being too loud, just hit him (or get Kageyama to do it).
Hinata would enjoy relaxing with you after a full day of volleyball. He may have almost inexhaustible reserves of energy but even he needs a break sometimes. Those are the moments when he just wants to relax with you in comfortable silence.
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zylophie · 1 year ago
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okay I uhh haven't requested match ups much but I saw yours and I really wanted to try!! if I do anything wrong please feel free to correct me because I'm new at this but I'd like to request a match up please! and thank you!!
Preferred gender to be matchup with: id like to be matched up with a male character and the source is genshin!
Personality Traits: okay uh.. I'm introverted. I don't go out often so I usually don't speak unless I'm spoken to. when I do speak to people though I genuinely love talking to other people and hearing what they have to say. I value interaction with others deeply. I'm someone who really loves to make others feel happy it just makes me feel warm inside. I do admit I tend to be anxiety ridden sometimes. I am working on it though! I appreciate when people are affectionate to me and cherish it deeply! I'm grateful for the kindness of others
Hobbies: I play violin.. and I like to sow! I love crafts like sowing and cross stitching and I love music! I don't have tons of hobbies so those are the ones I invest in the most. I wanted to learn how to bake but I'm a disaster in the kitchen so...
Love Language: quality time and words of affirmation! I want people to know that I care for them and I value spending lots of time with others. I don't want them to be left in the dark about my feelings towards them or feel neglected. I want them to know they matter
Funfacts: fun facts about me right? I HAVE A CAT.. he's huge and cuddly and my best friend. I like writing and stuff.. I have like 5 unfinished journals lying around. I love sweets.. like love love them. I need to work on my sugar cravings.. i eat sweets more than I drink water. I was also homeschooled majority of my life so I don't have much experience with people but when I do go outside I just like to be kind to everyone and chill.
Things you look for in a person: I don't expect a lot of people because nobody's perfect! but I do like people who are loyal and honest with me. like even if the truth hurts I prefer it over lies. I'd also like someone who doesn't mind that I'm anxious and tend to overthink.
Things you don't look for in a person: I guess someone who doesn't have patience for my anxiety. like being told I'm overreacting or that I'm annoying for it would put me down pretty bad. I don't want anyone who would betray or lie to me either.. thats about it!!
normal/both/yandere: id like both of possible!! if not it's completely okay!
thank you for taking time for my request!
♡ genshin impact matchup
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"૮₍ •⤙•˶|💌 ᴮᵉᵉᵖ..! ᵒⁿᵉ ᵐᵉˢˢᵃᵍᵉˎˊ˗
✉! .•°⟡˚ ༘ ʸᵒᵘ ʳᵉᶜᵉⁱᵛᵉᵈ ᵃ ᵐᵉˢˢᵃᵍᵉ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ʸᵘᵉ !
⌨️ᶻᶻᶻ...yue is typing... ♡
↻ᴹᵉˢˢᵃᵍᵉ ˡᵒᵃᵈᵉᵈ !
꒰ʜɪɪ ʜɪɪ, ʀᴇᴀᴅʏ ꜰᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴀᴛᴇ?꒱ 🎐~*
❛❛,,𝐎ᵖᵉⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ᵐᵃⁱˡ ᵗᵒ ˢᵉᵉ ʷʰᵒ ⁱˢ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᶠᵃᵗᵉᵈ ᵗᵒ ᵇᵉ!,,❜❜
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▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။||||။‌‌‌‌‌၊|• 0:10 ⁿᵒʷ ᵖˡᵃʸⁱⁿᵍ... Genshin Impact!
˗ˏˋ ★ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵖᵃⁱʳ ⁱˢ...Kaveh!★ ˎˊ˗
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ɴᴏʀᴍᴀʟ ᴍᴀᴛᴄʜᴜᴘ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
˚☽˚。⋆ Kaveh is very patient with you, he always wants you to be comfortable to be open with yourself...he is the type who shower you with sweet words and his usual line whenever you did a good job at something? It's "I'm so proud of you" and "I knew it that you can do it!"
˚☽˚。⋆ His favorite daily activity with you? He always leave little notes in your notebook whenever you weren't looking, he is always looking forward to your reactions to them!
˚☽˚。⋆ If you end up making a sweater, scarf or any kind of clothing...you can bet he is going to wear them with pride, he thinks your crafts should be seen by the world for their beauty because of your love and care towards your works.
˚☽˚。⋆ Kaveh adore your cat...well because they were raised with your love, right? He likes to think you and your cat are very similar in that sense, very loveable beings who are just very precious and cuddly which may or may not activate a protective side to him that he wasn't aware of until now...♡
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˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ʏᴀɴᴅᴇʀᴇ ᴍᴀᴛᴄʜᴜᴘ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
˗ˏˋ ★ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵖᵃⁱʳ ⁱˢ...Tartaglia/Childe!★ ˎˊ˗
˚☽˚。⋆ Childe likes chatting with you a lot, he loves hearing your voice especially when you're passionate about certain topics. He doesn't force you whenever you don't feel like talking in fact, he also enjoy those quiet moments with you!
˚☽˚。⋆ When he found out that you want to try your hands on baking... let's just say that he was well-prepared like sheesh, he make sure to buy aprons, mitten gloves, making sure the tools are clean...and you name it, he got everything set and ready! He just doesn't want you to get hurt during your baking experience is all.
˚☽˚。⋆ He love your cross stitching crafts, so much that he always keep them in his room and office...if anyone dare to question them, he would have a nice long chat with them... he just really adore anything you do really!
˚☽˚。⋆ Whenever he is away for work, he always send you sweets with letters as a reminder to not overdo it and take care of yourself while he is missing you from far...he always wants to see you being all healthy and happy when he come home to you after his missions ♡
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✿ — ↠ NOTE : I hope you like the results! I'm glad to be one of your first few matchup matchmakers, thank you for ordering with us~ ♡
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pastxlscorp · 3 years ago
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Highschool Headcanons - Tokyo Revengers
Featuring: Chifuyu, Mikey, Mitsuya, and Baji
Chifuyu
Definitely well-liked, mf grew out of his menace phase and is suddenly everyone’s crush
Everyone is gay or straight for this man.
Somehow oblivious to everyone’s attraction to him, man’s a homiesexual and doesn’t notice. When you say he’s attractive he’ll probably just turn tomato red and brush it off like “nooo, you’re prettier!” because he can’t accept compliments.
Kind to his classmates, very respectful to teachers and one of the smartest in the class.
I don’t think he’d gloat about his smarts. He’s confident of his abilities but doesn’t make that apparent to others, unless he’s bragging in front of his friends. He probably gets called on because he knows the answer but doesn’t volunteer.
I’d like to imagine he’s not very extroverted but quite ambiverted and reads manga during class, probably why he gets called on by teachers— they think he isn’t listening.
Looks like a playboy, absolute geek. Fan-girls about manga with his classmates and everyone’s in shock once they realize how nerdy he is.
Always dresses well, even styles his hoodies by using color combos.
Definitely in the school’s book club, boxing club, and in the smart people clubs like the mathletes. Watch the simps join to become friends with him.
To summarize, smart, ambivert, geek, but a sweetheart love him please
Locker is quite organized, mainly crammed with his favorite or current manga books though.
Mikey
His classmates don’t like him and find him quite annoying, always stealing food and pushing himself into conversations
Mf literally known as the “short menace”
His friends know this is his love language so they don’t take it personal, and defend him when their classmates try talking shit abt him
Mf is a menace when people come out rude. He will just joke around and be saying “SIKE” and he’ll get pushed, guaranteed you will be knocked the fuck out. Don’t ruin his vibe.
Very few classmates actually take the time to understand him, and once they learn more about him they find he’s very social-able and actually a big softie for his homies
Sleeps during class. Somehow, still passes— I imagine Mikey is very intelligent but he just doesn’t give a fuck. Probably would be an overachiever if he wasn’t sleeping his dumbass in class and kicking the shit out of people.
Doesn’t participate in any extracurricular activities. Often in detention for his violent tendencies.
His annoying behavior is him trying to get attention, my son… give him love please. He’s completely aware of how everyone perceives him and it makes him a little self-conscious but it doesn’t stop him— it’s who he is.
Actually dresses to impress, all of it is casual clothing though. He got the swagger ⁉️😟
Locker is nonexistent. His notes are in his brain.
Baji
He can’t be acting up, his mom would be so disappointed.
He eventually does ditch the poindexter persona with the glasses and slick back hair but he keeps the suit on.
He does, however, stay calm in class and doesn’t act out unless provoked.
Chifuyu tutors his ass (boyfriend moment)
Gets much better with Chifuyu‘s assistance, starts getting mainly A’s with 1 or 2 B’s.
As soon as he ditched the poindexter persona, everyone is either intimidated or into him. Some find him hot, others find him scary as fuck and probably shit their pants as he walks by.
Thinks that EVERYONE is intimidated by him, completely unaware some of his classmates are attracted to him. If you say he’s pretty he’ll freeze-- dont hurt my son please.
When dressing casual he doesn’t give a fuck about what he wears yet somehow looks good??
Boxing club with Chifuyu because it’s an excuse to be the sadist he is
Locker is a mess. Literally papers thrown around. Somehow, he still understands everything.
Mitsuya
Home-economics club, we see this. This is canon. You cannot disagree.
Classmates absolutely join the club just to talk to him and get to know him. 
I’d imagine he’s more on the introverted side, rarely speaks first and usually waits until spoken to. Doesn’t mean he won’t start a conversation though, it’s just rare since he minds his own business.
Very intelligent, I think he’d be the smartest out of these 4. Big overachiever while managing his sisters and being a division captain, this man has got it all.
Everyone admires him and respects him, along with thirsting over him. It’s very rare for him to speak to you first, you can imagine you’d be everyone’s envy if he does because it means you’ve caught his attention
Ultimately known as the “cloth boy” because of how good his sewing is.
Mf in the halls chilling w his music and vibing in his locker, everyone’s just staring at how pretty his side profile is /hakkai moment
Locker is SOOO organized, pretty with a mirror and magnets n shiz.
He dresses casual but my god his designs in his club?? Everyone wants to wear them. Headass would even look good with a wrinkled ass shirt
He knows he’s attractive and knows his impact on people. Tell him he’s pretty and he’ll be like “Oh? Thank you. You’re very pretty as well.” and give you the biggest shit-eating smirk.
Loves messing with people who are attracted to him, but he’ll only really make a move if he genuinely has a crush on you. A big fucking tease this man, I tell you.
a/n: am I posting this at 11pm? yeah. what are YOU gonna do about it?
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arminiloveyou · 3 years ago
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hii :33 i just came across your page and was hoping if i could request male aot and jjk matchupss; you can ignore this if matchups are closed though !!
so... i'll start with a general description — i'm 18+, straight, and smol LMAO (5'3), but i otherwise look p average: long hair/dark eyes (behind the frame of my glasses). i'm rly introverted, and i'm not the type to speak out unless spoken to, though if we fall into conversations abt something meaningful, i'd gladly share my thoughts.
likes — i don't have much i like in a materialistic sense, but the several few are: my piano, tea (i drink it everyday like it's water LOL), my devices. as for hobbies... i'm in love with classical music. it's going to sound incredibly cliché but i live my life around it (ironic, considering how i study something in a completely different field), and it makes up a p big part of who i am as a person so i practice the pieces on my list whenever i can. on the academic side, i'm passionate abt science, medicine specifically, so i do a lot of readings for that during my study blocks. If i'm not doing either though, you'll find me spending quality time with my family/friends, writing, or just simply relaxing.
dislikes — rude/selfish/arrogant/unreasonable (as in, ppl who won't listen) ppl, wasting time, waking up late (but i'm guilty of this oops)
needs/wants — my degree T_T and to make my biggest supporters in life (my close friends and family) proud of my efforts in whatever endeavour. there aren't rly traits i think my partner should have...? j be authentic rly, bc i'm rly not the type to become close w anyone (be they a friend or potential partner) easily, so if i like them, it will be bc of themselves and their philosophies.
thank you so much for taking the time to read this !!! again, i'm sorry if matchups are closed, and pls j ignore this if it is. i hope you have a great day wherever you are in the world !! rmb to stay hydrated and always know that you come first 🍹💛
hi cutieee hope you enjoy your matchup!!! thank you for those reminders - i needed the second one<3
for jujutsu kaisen i match you with…
FUSHIGURO MEGUMI
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soft boy is attracted to how shy n quiet you are. since he’s the same it makes him both comfortable but he also views you as mysterious n alluring. he thinks your interest in classical music especially is something notable about you. he’s so intrigued when he eavesdrops n hears you talking about it with the others. what is it about you that makes this your passion? what would it feel like for you to talk about him with such adoration? can you tell he’s holding his breath? shit does he look awkward sitting off to the side right now? you make his mind raceeeeee. his face’s no different when y’all get randomly paired together for an assignment but!!! please believe he’s shaking inside. he starts thinking of you when he trains - you become his biggest motivation to get stronger. another thing he overhears one day is how you’d care about your s/o’s philosophy n he travels down yet another rabbit hole - am i a good person? would they think i’m good? do they approve of my actions? my thoughts? he lets his feelings slip after you get slightly injured on a mission with him “jeez y/n!! you should’ve been careful agh now you’re hurt!!” “megumi it’s just a scr-“ “no that doesn’t matter… look i’m tryna be stronger for you but i can’t always be here please be careful i… i like you…” he walks away immediately after feeling soooo ashamed for “embarrassing” himself
for attack on titan i match you with…
JEAN KIRSTEIN
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jean can be sooo selfless n his interactions with you are no exception - rather an amplification. “you’re hungry? what do you wanna eat? you like tea right? what do you want with it? i’ll get you some… no really it’s no problem” “ahhh you’ve been studying so much y/n… when’s the last time you slept? for how long? awh y/n…” he’s such a mom but he’s so genuine n… it’s kinda hot… he’s always so supportive of you n absolutely freaks out before meeting your family for the first time… n the twentieth time… he just wants to be the perfect man for you!! deep down inside he knows he is but what if those close to you don’t perceive him that way? n what if life gets in the way? he thinks you’re so cute… the first time y’all fell into a long one-on-one convo together he literally could’ve passed out, he can’t remember a time he was ever happier… he gushed about it to connie n sasha n even wrote about it in detail in his journal justtttt in case he forgets… though he never does. he’s such a sweetheart!! marry him pleaseeee he wants to ask you in a few months he literally daydreams about domestic life with you… cleaning on sundays, cooking together, watching documentaries together… just being together
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creaturebehavior · 3 years ago
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you know what i miss? genuine connection
how do i find that? i know i’m still so young but sometimes i wonder if i’m destined to a life where i don’t ever meet anyone new who i connect with
maybe i need to open myself up more to the possibility
chelsea from teen mom met her husband at the gas station. and they are the most perfect match i have ever seen.
if i stay open to the possibility that i will meet more people i genuinely connect with, more people i deeply connect with, more people i have a soul connection with, it has to happen right?
more than anything, i think that needs to be my focus in manifestation right now
today, i was straightening and curling and styling my mannequin at school and i was pondering to myself….. we were listening to a rihanna playlist for so long it started to make me sick and i love rihanna but what a rollercoaster of eras and vibes. but the overall feel of rihanna’s music is depressing which i never exactly realized until today when our teacher had a rihanna playlist playing for god damn hours. and so my mind wandered as i was working and i noticed some drug cravings, i noticed many thoughts about how i need to go to an AA meeting (i’ll probably go to one tomorrow), i noticed thoughts about being lonely, i noticed a lot of thoughts full of resentment towards people in my past and towards some people in my present, i noticed myself wishing i had some friends in arizona, and i noticed myself wishing i had more friends in general, and i noticed myself wondering when i will be ready to date again and then i noticed myself missing being in a relationship for the same reasons i miss using drugs and for the same reason i struggle with binge eating, and i thought to myself i definitely need to make friends here first before i even think about dating because i don’t want to get into another codependent relationship where whoever i’m dating is my entire world and i have no friends.
so that’s where i’m at. i need to make friends.
the thing about being an introvert is, i am super picky about the people i spend time with because it takes a lot of energy for me to socialize. and i also am just no longer at a place in my life where i am willing to invest time and energy into friendships i don’t genuinely care about. if i know the connection is not there, why would i continue to try and force a connection? acquaintances are one thing, but fake friendships suck.
so far at school i haven’t connected with anyone. we are getting some new girls next week though when we start our nails module. every new module there’s a new start date.
i am aware though that i do have my guard up. way up sometimes. i don’t mean for it to be that way. i probably don’t seem approachable at all because i work in the corner by myself and i almost never speak unless spoken to. i thought i would be more comfortable with socializing but it’s not like being in rehab where you just have the ability to be open straight off the bat because of shared low circumstances, and it’s not like being at work where i was confident in what i was doing and it was also my job to be friendly and social with customers. i still am finding my bearings and unfortunately, i started the first week super timid and with no confidence because our first module is hair design and i have almost no experience in that area so i was very intimidated at first. and the other girls all kinda gravitated towards one another and i was left in this unusual dead space. part of why the other girls connected so fast is that the majority of them smoke weed together in each other’s cars during all the breaks. i know i have a habit of othering myself but i really don’t relate to the majority of the girls in our class and even the ones i do relate a bit to, i still have my walls up around them. because there’s so much more we don’t have in common than things we do have in common.
what i’m looking forward to is becoming more comfortable at school and more comfortable with myself, and slowly i will come out of my shell and eventually i will be confident and in that i will be a little more outgoing. i just know it.
all in due time
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stacijya · 4 years ago
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K personality break down!
I spent way too much time on this but here we go! (am willing to do other idols as well)
K has such a strong personality. To me its a beautiful thing. I think he is passionate, kind, hard working, and exudes natural confidence that I find very magnetic. However, I can see how some people may misunderstand that. So, in response to some “fans” who seem to not understand this beautiful creature for all his complexity and nuances, and armed with the information available on his profile, have researched and put together a breakdown of the facets of his personality. 
(disclaimer, I cannot pretend to know K on a personal level. I used parts of articles and descriptions that I thought best described his interactions within ILAND and that could be supported by i-cam footage or clips from the actual show.) 
Zodiac: Ox (1997)
Much like the image of an Ox, people born in this year tend to be persistent, honest, and straightforward. They are “talent leaders with strong faith, and strong devotion to work. They are contemplative before taking actions, not easily affected by the surroundings but just follow their concept and ability.” (travelchinaguide.com)
This is most likely where K gets the image of being arrogant or  stubborn. While this might be the undercurrent, I think the other facets of his personality are more often highlighted. Mind you Jungkook, Jaehyun, Cha Eunwoo, Mingyu, and Yugyeom are all Ox’s as well. These people hardly strike me as arrogant now, though I can see their stubborness and devotion (all positive ways). 
Blood Type: A
K, according to his profile, is blood type A which is often described as sensitive, passionate, clever, loyal, calm, consistent, and perfectionist. However type A’s can also be stubborn and overly sensitive. Generally, type A’s are stoic, majestic  and confident, three qualities that can often be misinterpreted as intimidating or rude when in actuality they are very sensitive and caring as well. 
Star Sign: Libra-Scorpio cusp
Libras are known for their flirtatious magnetism while scorpios are known for passion and power. This article sums it up pretty perfectly so I’ll just post a screenshot: 
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Libra-scorpio cusps are also known for their fierce loyalty to friends and family. They would willingly sacrifice themselves for their people. They are a combo of water and air which means they blend together the free spirited nature of an air sign with the calm and honest nature of a water sign. Sometimes their honesty can get away from them however and they have to take care not to hurt anyone with their words. 
MBTI: ENFP
K is an ENFP, also known as the Campaigner or the Creative Idealist. They move through the world in a way that draws natural attention. They have a wonderful knack for dividing work from play. They are driven idealists while working but passionate free spirits in their down time. 
Function stacks: extroverted intuition, introverted feeling, extroverted thinking, and introverted sensing. (Look up cognitive functions and function stacks if you need more context). This is also known as NeFi types which prioritize extroverted intuition and introverted feeling. 
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ENFPs are passionate, motivating, and versatile. Their primary function is extroverted intuition which means they pull meaning and draw connections out of the social world (relationships and interactions). They then use those meanings to better understand people, their motivations, and their true intentions(Fi). ENFx’s highly value genuine and honest people who don’t have ulterior motives or forced personas. They are very open and honest and expect the same returned to them. 
Also, ENFP’s are very creative, independent people who struggle to work within rigid structures and hierarchies. They hate being micromanaged and would prefer to have the time and space to do the work. Too much micromanagement can cause stress in an ENFP which often leads them to neglect their personal health and happiness. They tend to give more than others are able to reciprocate. 
But above all, ENFPs are kind. They “are very emotional and sensitive, and when they step on someones toes, they both feel it.” (16 personalities). They love open communication and want to listen as well. They really believe that everyone should take the time to recognize and express their emotions. 
Age Hierarchy in Japan vs Korea:
(I am not Korean or Japanese so I looked up scholarly articles to help me with this section. But, for context, I have been to both countries) 
In broad terms, Korea and Japan both have a system of age hierarchy that stems from Confucianism. The general idea is that older people, or people in positions of power, are to be highly respected by the younger generation or my subordinates. However, Japan and Korea have different interpretations of this ideal. 
The Japanese version is focused on “Senpai-Kohai” (student teacher) relationship. This is expressed in many contexts even outside of school. The idea is that the older generation is responsible for teaching the younger generation manners and skills. The Younger generation is expected to listen and learn all the lessons of their teacher or mentor. These roles aren’t always associated with age however. In fact, in recent years, the younger generations, especially in work places, have somewhat turned their backs on the idea that an older colleague is deserving of more honor simply because of their age. In some instances, Kohais will fake their respect for their senpais. Many companies have been forced to abandon this ideal all together, promoting and giving raises to workers who are more skilled rather than workers who are older, thus abandoning age in their hierarchy of honor. 
In Korea, however, the ideals of an age hierarchy are intenched much deeper in the culture. The age hierarchy is encouraged by confucianism but enforced by language and military culture. The korean language is organized around the idea of informal and formal speech in reference to someones age. One of the first questions asked in a conversation with a new person is “what is your age?” This established the social context and solidifies they type of speech a person must use. Older people must be spoken to with formal speech unless they give express permission otherwise. This is also enforced by military culture and the concepts of hoobae (subordinate) and sunbae (older/more experienced person). These roles have specific social expectations attached to them and carry significant weight. 
Citations: 
https://www.nst.com.my/opinion/letters/2018/08/404088/age-means-respect-japan-culture
http://evoice.ewha.ac.kr/news/articleView.html?idxno=1293
Physical Appearance
K is physically intimidating, no denying that. He’s tall, athletically built, outwardly confident, and mature. He shows his emotions plainly on his face and takes up a lot of space with his body and energy. His presence is felt regardless of where he is in a room. 
How it all works together
K is a wonderful person, but he has many aspects about his personality, culture, and appearance that can be misinterpreted as intimidating. Again, not only is he physically dominate in the space, his libra-scorpio cusp trait also make him ooze enigmatic appeal,  and his ENFP fills him with passion and drive. He dislikes hierarchy yet must work within a very hierarchical system and culture. He is the oldest among people much younger than him. He’s attempting to use his NeFi personality to create open bonds with many people who are afraid to share their feelings with him. He doesn’t speak enough Korean to fully express his emotions despite that being a fundamental part of his personality. 
K is enigmatic and mysterious with a combination of traits that are easily misunderstood. Every person, regardless of their personality, can grow and work through weaknesses, but, please be kind to them on their journey. We are all humans who must grow and learn as we develop and we can only hope that grace is granted to us as well. So give K grace as he learns to adapt to his surrounding, just as we gave grace to Heeseung, Jay, Niki, and all the others. 
I hope fans of K appreciate him even more and I hope those who doubt him can be more understanding of his perspective. Spread love not hate! 
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wtfzodiacsigns · 6 years ago
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The Signs as People I've Come To Know
Note that everyone described was born under the sign they are listed next to.
Aries: He doesn't really know fear, but when he does it's intense fear. More than anything, he is a daredevil, going from place to place and from person to person quickly and dangerously. He tells jokes until they're soiled and sour and you just wanna tell him to shut up, but you know you aren't going to because his stupid jokes that often make no sense and aren't even funny are all a part of what makes him who he is, so you can't help but laugh, and at the end of the day that's a person you find yourself always coming back for. A person you just genuinely want to be around for a long time. He can be air headed, but he protects ferociously and is endearingly kind to strangers. Inside, he never quite lost his childlike nature, something I hope he can one day embrace. I also hope he can one day understand, he is not his mistakes.
Taurus: She has a lot to say that she keeps inside, but whenever she does speak it is always soulful and insightful beyond description. It's so easy for her to get lost in her own mind, and though she doesn't care to admit it, it happens a lot that she shuts down and isolates herself. But everything is honestly better when she's around. Sometimes it's hard to convince her of that, but she has an inner and outer beauty that glows on everyone she meets. She doesn't realize other people take notice of her radiance. When she retreats, it's not uncommon for her to be quiet and not really know how to explain why she's feeling the way she is, and yet she approaches things with such an extreme level of insight and consideration. She makes everyone around her proud. Introverted as she may be, she pampers all her friends, even when they may not deserve it, and she's more brave and outspoken than I think she understands. She is one of the people who genuinely makes me happy.
Gemini: She is curious about almost anything and everything, and invests fully into things that interest her. It's actually beyond pleasant to watch her work out a task she loves working on, or talk about anything she loves in general, because her eyes light up and she has this smile on her face and you can just tell in that moment she loves being heard and she loves sharing what she's come to find wonderful with someone. I wouldn't call her quiet, at times she is, but I would first use the adjective "thoughtful" to describe her, as her mind is constantly generating new ideas. She processes and remembers information quickly and speaks about her feelings almost fluently. More than anything, I hope she knows I am always there for her. I hope she knows how much people love her. She is so kind, and a delight to be around.
Cancer: She has been through a lot. She used to walk through life with a heavy heart, but she is trying to learn how to remove the crutches and take everything as it comes. Very driven by her emotions, she experiences drastically different periods of highs and lows, but never lets anyone go to bed without knowing how much she loves them and cares about them. She has certainly been done wrong by the world, and this has led her to experience frequent trust issues and to on occasion become suspicious about other people's motives. However, this doesn't stop her from giving her all to those she loves, even if at times they may not completely deserve her help or her advice. She often settles for less than what she deserves, but I hope that she can eventually come to understand she need not settle and need not cater to people who do her wrong. She should look out for herself too, it's something she owes herself.
Leo: Though I haven't known her for very long, it's clear how influential she is and how in tune she is to other people's feelings. She seems very open to the world around her, and has no problem expressing herself without fear of what other people may think. She always does her makeup almost flawlessly, and you can tell she dresses for herself and no one else, and only worries about impressing one person, her. She is extremely loyal to those she cares about, and often talks about them as if they are wonders of the world. Even if you haven't spoken to her before, you will want to, because she gives off extremely positive and warm vibes, and publicly stands for everything and everyone she happens to believe in. She has a big personality, but a beautiful one at that, she is a true individual, and is one of the only other Leo's I've come to know, as well as one I hope to know better soon.
Virgo: She is wise beyond her years. She often works harder than most adults I've seen, although she is young in age. She always wants to make sure she has a say, but it's just as important to her that other people do, too. Other people don't always treat her as nicely as she deserves to be treated, and it's because they think they don't understand her, but in reality, they wish they had the heart and bravery that she does. She has accomplished and been through so much in such a short period of time, and she never let it taint all the love in her heart. She can be a bit anxious and scared, waking up at night after a nightmare or worrying she has not done her best, but she always gives her all, and I strongly believe there is nothing she cannot surmount or accomplish. Always willing, always eager to help. I wish I had her strength. I wish I had the beauty of her soul. I hope she someday sees how magnificent she is.
Libra: He is a character, he has always been a character dating back from the first day that we met. Everything he does and everything he says is with good intent and magnifies his already vibrant personality. Overall, he is a people's person, friends with everyone who is kind and attentive toward him. And he plans to keep it that way. He always tries to see the best in everyone. Although sometimes he cannot continue this and experiences outbursts of anger, they are usually temporary and he can move on from situations quickly. He is a marvelous friend. Creative, funny, often indirect, but always there in some form. Half the things that Come out of his mouth are jokes, but when he speaks and he's being serious, all you can hear is his heart speaking too. He's great to have around.
Scorpio: He says that he has a twisted mind, but really he's just into a lot of horror movies and has extreme reactions to otherwise small situations. I couldn't see him harming a fly, unless the fly went and did something to really piss him off. He can be a little self centered, but he is also self sufficient and just wants to make sure he himself is okay. When he starts something, it'll get done before he moves onto the next thing, and he's not really one to leave anyone with unanswered questions as he's pretty intense and direct. He's great to talk to because no silence is ever awkward, some of those silences are necessary and he knows it. He won't let things stay quiet for too long, either. One of my favorite things about him is once you've been a part of his life, he'll never forget about you. Even if you're miles and miles away.
Sagittarius: He gets extremely excited about small things, like going on a trip or hanging out with his friends and playing video games. He knows no part of life is insignificant, and that everything we go through either means something or leads to something else, but he also knows when to let go and stop worrying about things that are out of his control. Overall, he loves to have fun. He loves to laugh with his friends and share what makes him happy. When people disagree with him, he can become rather snippy, and might even resort to telling them they are flat out "wrong." He doesn't realize he's being rude, but often it just doesn't come out the way he would like because he speaks exceedingly freely. That's what he is, a free spirit. He makes decisions for himself and is not afraid of his opinions. He will share them willingly with anyone who asks and takes great pride in being who he is and leading the adventure called his life.
Capricorn: She is aware of who she is, what her limits are, and what her intentions are as well. Though sometimes she surprises others by acting the way one wouldn't have expected, she is consistently trying to take responsibility for things she know she's done wrong and does not like it when people refuse to acknowledge it when she has been acting like a fool. She holds herself accountable for many things, even when they are not exactly her fault, and she refuses to be kept in the dark for too long. When people don't like her, she wants an explanation, because she always tries to do her best and be the best version of herself she can become. It hurts her to consider that she is not doing well with that. She wants stability and security, she wants to be able to feel safe in situations, and that's all a part of what she fights for. Overall, life is a fight she does not want to lose. And one she will not allow herself to.
Aquarius: She is one of the most artistic people I've had the privilege of meeting, and decorates everywhere she goes and everything she creates with her glowingly positive vibes. She cares deeply about her friends, and however quiet she has a brilliant way of words, and is a phenomenal person to have a late night (or any time of day really) conversation with. She understands life on a deep level that not a lot of people do. Although she may not always feel comfortable completely showing her emotions, she is not afraid to be in touch with them and always knows how to nicely phrase them. I'm grateful that when I ask her what's wrong, she doesn't lie to me and she trusts me enough to talk to me about it. I know it's not always the type of thing that's easy for her. She is artistically talented in every aspect, and aims to perfect her performance in all she does. But honestly, the way she adds her own flair to all she accomplishes and makes it so original is an amazing thing to witness in itself.
Pisces: He doesn't understand the impact he can have on others. It is not uncommon for him to get so lost in his thoughts he forgets about the rest of the world, but he seemingly always finds his way back. Whenever he drifts, he will usually talk about it at one point or another, and he always has all these philosophical things to say that never cease to amaze me. His speech is always sweet and fluid, and he always sees things, both their interior and their exterior. Even though sometimes he asks silly questions, he's highly perceptive and caring. He loves having a good time, but he loves talking about life and all it entails as well, and he knows that both those things can overlap. He's one of the greatest friends I think I will ever know, and he always tries to be, even if at times he can't. I wish he came out everyday.
Source:avenge-my-ghost
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dogboyheaven · 3 years ago
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Not to sound like one of those obnoxious hyper-online introverts but genuinely how the fuck are you supposed to function as a barista when u are not naturally extroverted. I do not speak unless I am spoken to
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so-make-the-moon · 7 years ago
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Buckle up, kiddos - here are my thoughts on the new GMM format! FIRSTLY. I loved it. There’s not going to be a tonne of criticism here, so if that’s what you’re looking for, please don’t go any further. I will pick at a few things, but in general I liked it and want more of it. I do go in depth, though, so if you want to hear that then please jump right in! This gets long, y’all.
So we’ll start with the few criticisms I do have. But with each negative, I tried to make sure I had a positive attitude towards it. I do think it felt a bit too scripted. The Will It? actually felt quite natural and very, very similar to the rest of the recent Will It?s, and the Instagram segment felt fairly non-structured as well (again, compared to recent, similar episodes - certainly far more structured/scripted than a couple years ago, but more along the lines of their recent quiz episodes). However, I also realise that this is the first episode of a new format, a big change for them, and a show that likely has more pull from Youtube. They’re going to be careful. Everything is going to be planned, with a few spaces for genuine, spontaneous jokes, especially for the first few episodes before they figure it all out. Go look back at the first GMMore episodes - they were pretty horrible. They were like 3 minutes long and awkward as hell. They didn’t know what to talk about and they ended awkwardly. The wheel itself is awkward (I’ve always had trouble watching the wheel endings, even the super Rhinky ones), and trying to add onto the end of them was nearly unbearable for me to watch. Lighting/camera angles//sound/etc - I noticed the things that people are pointing out as negatives, and some of it was a little bit distracting (except the lighting, that never bothered me at all) but so easily fixed. I’m sure they can tell what looks awkward or unnatural, and they’re experimenting. It’s going to flow differently, but technical “issues” are easily addressed. However, they’re also easy to get used to. So either they’re not going to change it and in a few weeks none of us are even going to notice/remember it, or they’ll see the feedback and think “oh yeah, that does look a bit weird, let’s try something new.” Either way, I think that issue will be solved within the month. It makes me so. sad to see such horrible negativity. Criticism is fine! Constructive criticism makes the world go ‘round. We need that, and we need people who can take it for what it is and improve upon the thing. What we don’t need are people bashing new things as soon as they start - give it a freaking chance! I said this a few weeks ago when I saw so many people who were nervous (I was too!) that I hope Rhett and Link and Mythical Co just let it settle. Just - don’t do anything rash and change things as soon as people start criticizing it. They need to give the audience (us!) the chance to get used to it before changing anything. If we still hate certain aspects of it after a month or two or three, then maybe slowly implement those changes. They have worked so hard on this, they’ve run themselves ragged, they’re exhausted because they want to make this a good thing for US to watch and enjoy. The absolute least we can do is give it and them a fucking chance. Things I LOVED about the new format: The close sitting at the desk. We’re not losing their closeness or their friendship. We’re all here because of them and what they started 30+ years ago, so I know some of us were worried that they would seem like just 2 co-hosts sitting behind a desk. I actually think they were more genuinely touchy-feely-lovey-dovey than they have been for a while. Maybe that’s just a manifestation of their nerves on their first new episode, maybe they realised they needed each other’s proximity and comfort more that day than other days, but they really do seem like they’re getting closer by the day. How that’s possible after so many years, I have no idea. More content! Sure, some of it was a bit awkward today, and I didn’t watch the whole jingle segment because I’ve never been into that personally (I was so uncomfortable watching the Miranda Sings Christmas song episode, and the Songs for When episodes), but there’s more of it, and that’s what I’ve always wanted. More Rhett and Link being ridiculous and happy and silly. Rhett must have been nervous because he seemed even softer than normal, if that’s possible. He’s always fairly soft-spoken unless he’s mad at Link about something and fake-yelling at him, but it felt like in the More he was a bit quiet. When he did talk, he was speaking softly, gently, and with a younger sounding voice, always accompanied by a very sweet smile. It was him, but he seemed even more introverted and nervous. (I guess this isn’t something I love about the new format, it’s something else for me to love about Rhett <3 He’s just so freaking sweet.) Not GMM specific but WOOD n BERRIES? REALLY BOYS? Jeez, they’re not really being subtle with the innuendo these days and I am HERE FOR IT. New wheel endings! As I said, I’ve always had a bit of trouble with the improv’d wheel endings. I get quite embarrassed for other people, and the wheel often ended up with a lot of dead air, or one of them not knowing where the other was going with it, or was shipbait-y (listen, I know I just did a whole two posts on how much I actually love shipbaiting, but I KNOW that it can be tiresome for the people involved. It gets old, fast, and that’s easy to see on their faces). However, I won’t lie and say I don’t miss it a little bit. I love gifticality the most, but the others always seemed so hands off - they were just trying to get us to do things, but they had nothing to do with it. They don’t even google the Do Not Googles anymore! So I do hope this brings back some improv (like the Sudden Secret and Mini Duels. It’s improv hopefully without being too awkward for us or too shipbait-y for them). I did NOT think the gags/air vomits were fake. Just FYI. I don’t have anything else to say about this. BIG DADDY. AND. BIGGER DADDY. Get’em, Link. MORE CHARACTERS! Yas. I am all about more characters - I imagine we’ll be seeing more of Rabbit Lightning and Mythical Moms. I also hope we’ll get a couple new ones! I also think we’re going to get a lot more songs! And while the jingles and improvs make me uncomfortable, I love when they actually come up with a new, full song, like in Buddy System. I hope that we get some segments with full songs/music videos like they would have posted on their Rhett and Link channel. I still can’t wait for cuddles. I’m interested in the guests - will it be interview style, challenge style (I hope it’s challenges, I love seeing them work together against another team. Actually, I even love seeing them on opposite teams because they usually end up helping each other and that’s just so perfect), hanging out chatting style?? One other thing I will say (this is neutral, I think, so I didn’t know where to put it) is that I kind of hope they take the crew out of the More and put them into the regular episodes. To me, now, the larger episodes have more space for the crew and the more structured system lends itself to crew participation, whereas the contrast of the very casual More lends itself more to Rhett and Link just sitting and talking, which we all want more of. More of like a story-time element. I have no idea if they would go for this (probably not), but I think it would make me like it that much more. Everyone can’t like everything. Some people are going to like some episodes but not others, and even some segments but not others (like me - I skipped almost an entire segment today and still came away from it feeling like it was a good experience). They’re adults, I know that they know all this, but the sheer amount of negativity and bashing is making me incredibly sad. It upsets me to know that they’re reading that, even if I know they can handle it and I know they know how to parse through it to find the genuine, helpful comments. So far I think there’s a lot to like and a lot to look forward to, and a few small things that could be improved upon. Now, I’m off to write a positive youtube comment (and very carefully not read any of the ones that are already there) and tweet a nice comment as well.
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eponymous-rose · 8 years ago
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what are your thoughts on introvert vs extrovert?
I’m not sure if this is referring to something in particular, but hey, this is weirdly timely, so.
I get pretty tired of the whole “introverts are precious brilliant thinkers and extroverts are horrible loud alien creatures” thing that comes around all the time, and I guess what I’ve found to be a marginally more helpful way of thinking of it is to consider two axes: introvert-extrovert and shy-outgoing, where “introvert/extrovert” is all about whether you regain energy around people or alone, and “shy/outgoing” is the ease with which you can jump into an unfamiliar social setting.
So, like, it’s pretty easy to think of shy introverts or outgoing extroverts, but I almost feel like it’s more common to run into people who’re on the other diagonal of those axes.
I’ve gradually become an outgoing introvert. I was absurdly shy for a very, very long time (I mean, for years I wouldn’t tuck my hair behind my ears because it felt too exposed), but now I genuinely enjoy social encounters and generally find myself at the center of social gatherings. I like getting to know new people in all kinds of situations and if somebody’s hovering at the edge of a discussion, I’ll often be the one to pull them in. But holy moly, I’m an introvert. I’ve had a handful of social gatherings this week that were all incredibly fun, but I just had to leave the office early because I was so exhausted from being around people that I kept bursting into tears at the thought of someone else talking to me. If I can pull it off, I am perfectly content to go a week or more without talking to anybody. I don’t tend to get lonely; being around people is neat but some part of my brain is always craving that time alone. I enjoy being around people the same way I enjoy going for a long run; it feels like it’s stretching my capabilities, I genuinely have a good time, but afterwards all I want to do is sit under a hot shower for like ten years and stare into the middle distance.
In contrast, my officemate is the epitome of the shy extrovert. She spends a lot of time analyzing other people’s impressions of her and very rarely speaks unless spoken to in a social situation; we’ve gone to parties where she stood silently in a corner the whole night, and social anxiety has always been a struggle with her. But at the same time, she craves social interactions with close friends and gets exhausted and miserable when she’s alone for extended periods of time. She loves the stimulation that comes with chatting with other people; for her, not being around people and evolving and changing with their needs and interests is like only getting to be a small part of her true self. Once she gets to know the people she meets in social situations, she’s in her element.
And there are obviously exceptions for both of us! I’ve had a very, very small number of friends who almost without fail energize me when I talk to them. My officemate unexpectedly had to spend a week alone in a new city after a breakup and had a lovely time. And over five years of friendship we’ve spent a lot of time hashing out our comfort levels in order to have a workable friendship that isn’t totally unfair to one or both of us (I can go “I can’t hang out, I need to do nothing tonight” and she gets that it’s my recharging thing; she can go “can we hang out, I really need to be around people right now” and I’ll get that it’s her recharging thing).
So, you know, people are complicated and change over time, and for whatever reason it seems particularly tempting for folks on either side of the introvert/extrovert thing to consider their own group to be the only full and complex human beings on the planet. Bring some more axes into it, be willing to compromise here and there, and you can get a much fuller picture!
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twilightlv2 · 7 years ago
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How to Be Twilight's Friend
Not that I can imagine why you'd want to, but...
Things you should understand:
I am an introvert. That means I prefer being on my own, and there are times when I just want to be physically the only one in the same room as me. Online I don't mind as much, but IRL I will become uncomfortable if people are around when I don't want them to be.
However, just because I don't talk to you doesn't mean I don't want you to talk to me. This goes double for online - I am very passive in general, so I will rarely if ever initiate a conversation with someone, but don't let that stop you from messaging me. If I haven't heard from you in a long time I might start to worry that something bad happened to you or that you're not talking to me because I've done something to upset you somehow.
If I have done something to upset you, please tell me what it was. I can't learn from my mistakes if I never know I'm making a mistake in the first place.
I don't talk much, especially IRL. I tend to only speak when spoken to, especially if I'm in a group. This doesn't mean something's wrong, it's just how I am.
One-on-one conversations IRL make me uneasy. Though it helps a lot if you and I share a common interest.
I'm not interested in conspiracy theories, in any way. I don't care whether you think the Earth is flat, or whether you think that people who think the Earth is flat are idiots. I genuinely could not care less.
I have little tolerance for transphobes, homophobes, etc. Being a transgender lesbian myself, you should probably expect this.
And on that note, please understand what "transgender" means. I am not "a boy who wants to be a girl". I AM a girl. What I want is for people to recognise me as a girl, and for my body to change to reflect that.
I will freely admit that I am a Grammar Nazi, and that's something you'll have to deal with if you want to be my friend. Please understand that I will correct you if you get something wrong, but please also understand that my intention is not to make you feel bad or to make myself seem superior to you. I'm just trying to inform and educate.
I mostly don't care what you do as long as it doesn't actively affect me and won't result in your death or serious injury.
If I want to do something with you, usually of a hypnotic nature, and I say "just message me whenever you're free", I am putting a LOT of trust in you. Namely trusting you to actually do that and not just forget about me. My biggest worry is that people will forget about me. It often takes a lot of self-restraint not to message people I've made this kind of arrangement with every day basically saying "Are you free yet?" since I often feel like people will forget about me if I don't do that. Please, send me a message every few days or so. Let me know you haven't forgotten me.
If you're someone I've played with before, and I'm asking if you're up for doing something, especially if it's late at night where I am, I'm probably depressed and want to play with someone to make myself feel better.
I often don't really have very strong opinions. If you ask me how I feel about something, my response will usually be either "It's not bad" or "It's good."
I love quizzes. Like, I seriously love quizzes. Both giving them and receiving them. If you love quizzes too, we are going to have so much fun together.
I also love video games. They are my favourite thing in the world. I highly recommend being into video games if you want to be my friend.
I have no interest in sport, whether watching or playing. Especially football/soccer.
I don't drink alcohol. Don't try to change that.
If I say I don't want to do something, it means I don't want to do it. Full stop.
I don't go clubbing. I don't like crowded or noisy places, and nightclubs are usually both of those things. I don't like dancing either.
I am a very physical person, especially with girls. Though I'm also shy, so I won't touch you unless I know I have permission. I love cuddling, being petted and stroked, etc.
If I'm watching something, whether it be a cutscene in a game, a video on YouTube or an anime episode, I like to devote all my attention to it. Please don't talk to me at these times, I probably won't respond and it'll just annoy me. In general, if it seems like I'm intently focussing on something, it's probably best not to talk to me.
If you say something and I don't respond at all - not even non-verbally - that's my way of indicating that I either don't want to talk about that particular thing, or I want you to stop talking altogether. If you're not sure which it is, pay attention to what I'm doing at the time. If my attention is either on you or on nothing in particular (like I'm just looking at the wall, ceiling or something), it's the former. If I'm paying attention to something specific other than you (like my laptop), it's the latter.
Okay, there's probably more but it's 04:11 so I really should sleep. Hopefully this was informative to some people.
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