#i also saw a tweet i tried and failed to find again

[deliriousblue]

THE HEART KILLERS (2024) episode nine

[amaranthineghost]

I'LL LET YOU GO IF THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT ( lando norris. )

lando norris x reader

a little over half a year later when the season ended, they haven't found their way back. At least not on purpose, but the universe knows better than them

authors note: I was thinking of making a happy ending, but not everything always ends up that way </3 after this, I'll work on two max imagines and then I'll see what I can do while I'm on spring break

part 1 found here

IT’S BEEN EIGHT MONTHS since she last spoke to him.

two hundred forty-three days since she last saw that sad look on his face in the rear-view mirror as she drove away from the past she half-wished was her future.

five thousand eight hundred thirty-two hours since she last felt his touch, his arms consoling and unwilling to let her go and yet she still left.

three hundred forty-nine thousand, nine hundred and twenty seconds since the peak of his performance at the beginning of the season. now she watched as he tried and failed to be what he once was. maybe not a winner, or a champion, but he’d had her, which was practically equal.

but now he had lost her.

now she watched as the season came to an end. poor performance after poor performance after poor performance where not all races ended in crossing the finish line.

she never stopped watching, yet she could never reach out, and neither would he. he was always going to be ready to accept her back into his life, yet he knew she needed time.

but she didn't know if she could do it again, though at the same time she kept eyeing his life in envy because part of her wished she could live the way he could without being bothered by the media. part of her was jealous he could live his entire life in front of a camera and be so nonchalant about it.

scrolling through his socials, they still followed each other and it caught people's attention. she read through countless tweets, theories and rumors of their relationship still carrying on behind the cameras, and though she partly wished it to be true, she hated that it wasn't. the fans still wished, and she would too.

the random appearances in the paddock had come to an end, unfortunate for the fans who loved whenever she’d show up in support of her boyfriend, turned ex.

because now all she did was stay within the confines of her apartment building, shielded from the possibility of running into lando. she couldn’t handle bumping into him when she still felt as fragile as glass. she felt like she would shatter if she saw him again, no matter how much she wanted him back.

but living in monaco means you're bound to run into someone from his circle of life.

it felt bittersweet because she wanted him back so badly, to have him hold her in his arms and tell her they’d make it work. but it’d never happened, and truthfully, she hoped it never would. because she knew that if she saw him, she wouldn’t go running back into his arms as if making it work again was the easiest option. because really, if she saw him, she would run, not towards him but away, and she dreaded the fact that he would let her.

he’d watch the love of his life run from him rather than to him and be totally fine with it. because he knew that when the time was right, she would find him again, or he would find her, and only then she wouldn’t run from him.

but he feared for the day that he would realize that she was never coming back to him. he feared for the day where he would realize he shouldn't have let her go.

and he hopes for the day, though it may never come, where she does find the right time to come back to him. he prays for the day where he would make the right choice he should've made the first time.

because in the infinite universes that are said to exist, even if she never returns in nearly every one, he hopes to live the one where she would.

but he knows that if there's a universe where she comes back, even after his idiocy of letting her go to begin with, there's also one where this could've been avoided all together. a universe where he didn't have to watch her pack her bags while shuddering with sobs.

a universe where he wouldn't have to go without her for eight months, where his performance improved when she attended grand prixs.

the one he'd rather live with her than without.

it was unsure when they would ever see each other again. they'd gone this long without seeing the other, who's to say they ever would?

it was chilly in the streets of monaco, contrast to the usually warm, sunny climate the area was known for. she wore a thick coat while she walked down the sidewalk, past the seasonal market with nothing more than her phone, wallet and tote bag.

she needed to get out, to think. she couldn't stand being trapped in the box of her apartment surrounded by nothing but reminders of him. not that it was a bad thing.

she couldn't take another second overanalyzing the helmet he had left for her. she knew it was part of his plan to have her back. to make her want more helmets dedicated to her, which he continued to do despite her not being with him. she'd be lying if she said his plan was failing.

the hoodie, probably tied into the same plan, covered in his damn cologne he knew she couldn't get enough of. it had faded over time, becoming replaced with the smell of her instead. she didn't know what to think of it.

she considered purchasing that same cologne again, drowning the fabric in its fragrance. it wouldn't be the same.

she felt like she could breathe easier with the winter air rather than the stale air of her apartment. sure, she could've stepped onto the balcony, but it was always nice to find a way out of her apartment complex.

hands stuffed in her pockets, she wandered around aimlessly at the shops that lined the streets and stalls set up to buy from.

riddled with things that caught her eye, she couldn't help but stop at nearly every stall. it took an incredible amount of self control to not buy everything she wanted. she didn't have lando by her side to buy everything.

this was her life now. she had a job that she could do from home and it paid her rent. it was enough to live off of while she completed her last years of school before she started a career for herself. tiny little trinkets seemed good in the moment, but she knew long-term that it’d eventually hurt her financially, and besides she didn’t have that much space in her apartment.

she didn’t know how much time had passed. everything was a blur as she mindlessly walked on. she hadn’t noticed when she bumped her shoulder into somebody’s chest, and she had immediately begun to apologize.

“i’m so sorry, i wasn’t looking where i was—lando?” she recognized the curly-haired guy in front of her as she stood there frozen.

“hey, long time no see,” he spoke slowly and warily, looking her up and down at the changes of her appearances that occurred over the last eight months.

“uh—what are you doing here?” she questioned, stuttering over her words just slightly as she looked at him tensely.

lando looked around with a brow raised, hands in his pockets while he answered, “uh, i live here?”

she nodded, “right.”

the air was awkward as they stood in a tense silence. people ushered around them, occasionally bumping into them. they hadn’t known what to say to each other because they weren’t expecting this impromptu meeting.

“how’ve you been?” he broke the silence.

she nodded again, “fine, and you? i saw that your season wasn’t too good.”

he grimaced softly at her words, “yeah,” he scratched the back of his neck, “just some technical issues.”

“right.”

the silence was back and more deafening than the first time, standing awkwardly looking at each other didn’t help.

again, he was the one to break it, “could i buy you a drink?”

“isn’t it a bit early for alcohol?” she questioned, looking at the brightness of the sky before her gaze settled back down at him with a weird look.

he scoffed, “i mean the coffee shop down the street,” his voice was a half chuckle as he began walking, leaving her to follow.

“well, you’re unpredictable these days,” she fell into step with him as they walked side by side in silence.

it took all of two minutes for them to arrive at the coffee shop lando had mentioned. they could smell the aroma from a ways away, the door left open to let in the cool breeze.

the shop was warm and cozy, most tables were occupied except for a few scattered around. she reached for her wallet to buy herself a coffee, but he quickly shut it down.

“it's my treat,” was all he said before he walked up to the counter with his card in hand to order as she took the two seater by the window, setting her bag down on the ground. she watched the world from where she sat, the people walking by.

groups of friends, pairs that weren’t quite at the stage of being a couple, or the single person walking by every so often. all without crossing paths. it seemed crazy to her how so much could change because of a stranger on the street.

looking back to where lando stood ordering, she wondered what her life would’ve been if they hadn’t met. they wouldn’t have traveled the world, stayed out late on rooftops, or partied in clubs despite her hesitancy. he wouldn’t have dedicated nearly his whole career to her because she was forever a piece of him.

she realized how much she had meant when she saw just how much of her he still kept. he wore shirts with printed pink bows, the one gold bracelet he wore among the silver and fan bracelets given to him by her and he never took it off. the way he styled his hair in the way she taught him, the matching rings they still wore, the references of her personality on his helmet for every race rather than a specific track, her name on his car.

her name on his car.

her name printed in pretty cursive across the top of his steering wheel and the halo for him to see.

he still managed to include her in his life despite her absence because he considered her his lucky charm. having reminders of her anywhere he could would always manage to boost his spirits, but only her presence would boost his performance.

the chair across from her pulled out with an uncomfortable scrape of the legs against the floor. she grimaced slightly, but it quickly disappeared when she refocused on the hand that slid a mug filled with hot coffee to her.

clearly they were going to be here a while, judging from the mug and not a to-go cup. she watched the steam swirl into the air as she softly blew on it while lando sat across from her with his beverage of choice. she also noticed the chocolate-chip cookie in a paper bag he held.

he remembered her love of sweets. she took a sip of her coffee. he remembered her order to the finest detail. he still remembered.

“thanks,” she spoke quietly before taking another small sip of the hot beverage. it slightly burned her tongue and throat as she drank, but she didn’t care to notice.

she was sitting across from lando norris, the one person she had been hoping to avoid this whole time, and now she’s sat with him at a coffee shop they used to frequent when they were dating.

“you’re welcome,” he muttered, his saddened eyes unmoving from her face, watching every expression of hers unfold. “so, how have you been?”

“you’ve already asked that,” she stated simply.

“i mean,” he started, leaning forward with his arms crossed against the table, “how have you really been? i don’t believe for a second that you’ve been fine when i‘m barely holdin’ it together.”

she sighed, taking another sip and grimacing at the burn, “it’s been difficult, but i know it was for the best that we broke up.”

he nodded in response, his fingers circling the rim of his mug as he stared into it.

she spoke up again, saying the words he dreaded to hear, “and i think it should stay that way.”

his shoulders visibly dropped and he bit his cheek before he looked back at her with colorless eyes, “but—” he began when she hastily cut him off.

“i need you to let me go,” her voice cracked as she spoke and tears filled her eyes as she avoided his gaze, “you have to let me let you go, lan.”

“please, don’t make me do this,” he begged, leaning forward again with a look that could make her change her mind in a second.

“please, don’t make this harder than it already is,” she shook her head as the tears began to fall, “in another universe, it might’ve been me and you, maybe the circumstances would've been in our favor, but not in this one.”

“it’s just right person, wrong life.”

“i’ll find you in our next lifetime then,” he promises, his eyes brimming with tears. he tried his best to hold back, for her, “i promise.” he tried to remain strong, for her.

“I know you will.” she said simply, smiling through her tears as she pursed her lips, sniffling as she played with her fingers. “y’know, i'll always be your number one supporter, lan. i'll still cheer for you, just from behind a screen. in that other life, i would come to your races.”

“but even in this one, i'll still celebrate your first win, your first championship. i'll vote you for driver of the day, even if you’re dead last.”

he chuckled sadly at the last part, the corner of his mouth twitching with a smile, “how will i know for sure you didn’t get bored of watching me race?” his hand reached across the table, his tan slightly faded and his rings cold.

she rolled her eyes softly, “you’ll know. i promise.” she laid her hand on his, the last somewhat intimate touch they’ll ever have with each other because after he watched her stand, pocketing the cookie he bought. he watched her through the window as she walked into the crowd as if their paths never met.

he watched with tears in his eyes, silently crying as he watched the love of his other life turn her back on him forever. he let her.

because if there was one thing he knew how to do, it was letting her go.

part of her wanted him to chase after her, wipe her mascara-stained tears just like that regretful day in their old apartment because part of her still wanted him in her life. she wished she could still go back sometimes.

he wished she would just come back. he wanted to experience life with her, he wanted to win with her, be a champion with her.

but he lived in the wrong universe, and he was unsure if he'd ever see her in this life again, in the way he wanted. they would bump shoulders on the street, looking longingly for just a second as they ushered by in a hurry. not looking back, but never forgetting how much they had meant to each other for the time they were together.

how crossing paths, even for what seemed like the shortest time to them, changed the trajectory of their lives forever. they would subconsciously look for qualities of each other in the people they moved onto. telling stories to their kids and grandkids about the other in regretful tones because they wished it was the kids they had together that they could tell the story of their relationship to.

because now they were just strangers, she was just a name he would forever keep on his car, and he was just an old lover turned stranger she would send flowers to after every podium and win until he would retire.

—

taglist (found here): @slut4lrh @taylorslovesswifties13 @leclercdream

proofread by @foreveralbon <333

[outsideratheart]

You Should Have Told Me (Alexia Putellas x reader)

Being away from Alexia was never easy. In fact it got harder as time went on. Luckily for you it didn’t happen often, only really when you went back to Australia whether it be for national team camp or to be with family. This time was the latter.

Like always, you and Alexia spoke to each other and found a way for it to work with the time difference. You were getting into bed and tried calling Alexia but she didn’t answer. You thought she might be busy so you text her and wait for a respond only one doesn’t come.

When you wake up the next morning you find the reason for her radio silence. A tweet which makes you feel sick.

Alexia Putellas will undergo arthroscopy surgery on 27th December.

You are filled with worry but you are also mad at your girlfriend. Why on earth were you finding this out in the internet and not by the woman herself.

Despite your mixed emotions you find yourself on a flight back to Barcelona after a length apology to your family. Funnily enough they knew it was coming as soon as they saw the news. They had only met Alexia once but the love you had for her was evident. They saw it on your face every time her name popped up on your phone.

It was the 27th by the time you arrived home or to your other home. Everyone was well aware of your relationship with Alexia so the nurses didn’t question it when you arrived at the hospital asking for her whereabouts.

“Y/N” Alba greets you with a warm hug “Alexia didn’t tell us you were coming”

“Clearly Alexia is going through a not telling people stuff phase”

Alba swallowed deeply. Your annoyance was clear and if that wasn’t a telling sign, you calling her sister by her full name was.

“Y/N I didn’t—“ Eli joins the two of you in the hall but stops talking mid sentence when she sees her youngest daughter shaking her head.

“I wouldn’t mama”

“She is in there” Eli point the door behind her “she didn’t want—“

Again she was cut off, this time by you.

“Don’t fight her battles Eli. She knew what she was doing. Feliz Navidad by way” you kiss both women on the cheek.

The two of them watch you enter Alexia’s room.

“You two need a lesson in manners. You know it’s rude to interrupt people” Eli says to Alba given that you are in the hospital room.

You get a sick sense of deja vu when you enter the room Alexia’s in. The same happened last summer and you stayed by her side for the entire thing. It’s why now didn’t make sense. You looked up the surgery, it was minor. Why didn’t she want you here now but happily had you with her then.

Alexia pays no attention to you when you enter and although she is there physically you can tell her mind is far away.

“I know I’m not your emergency contact but I would of thought being your girlfriend earned me a call or at least a text”

This got her attention. It was a good job she was already at the hospital because the speed in which she turned her head could have given her whiplash.

“Mi amorcito”

“Alexia”

Her faces changed at this. You could almost see her wince at the formalness.

“I deserve that” she knows she did wrong by not telling you. Still, she pats the space next to her hoping that you’ll join her on the bed.

She watches each step you take, you get closer to her but stop at the foot of her bed.

“What? I don’t get a hug? I am in the hospital” she tries to get you to crack a smile but fails miserably.

“Repeat those last 4 words”

“I am in the hospital” she is slightly confused because you clearly heard her.

“We have been through a lot together Alexia. Yesterday you told me everything was fine, the medics had given you a green light and that you were packing for the trip. You lied”

“Y/N I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just wanted —“

“Miss Putellas it’s time” one of her doctors come in.

“Give me a minute” Alexia doesn’t ask, she demands “I’m in the middle of something”

“No. Take her. We’re done here”

At first Alexia panics. What did you mean by we’re done here. It sounded almost like a break up but before you leave you walk over and kiss her temple. It was a small sign that you were not breaking up with her.

Her eyes remain on you as you walk out the door. Her mother steps in her eye line and Alexia recognises the look on her face; she is in trouble.

“You didn’t tell her, idiota!” Alba appears from behind their mother.

“Alba not now”

“No Mija, she’s right. When you wake up you need to fix this. That girl is the best thing to happen to you and you know that you should have told her. Alexia, she is your girlfriend she had a right to now”

“Por Dios! I know I messed up. I thought I was doing the right thing”

Alexia truly did think that. You had been with her to every physio appointment since the champions league game. You hadn’t been back in Australia long when the decision was made for her to get surgery. You had played the most minutes this season so far and for the sake of your own health you needed to rest, to recover.

She wanted you with her and truth is she needed you with her but she sacrificed that solace for you.

The surgery took two hours which is within the predicted time or least that’s what Google told Alexia when she looked it up. She woke up and saw two woman, neither of them the one she wanted to see.

“She left, didn’t she?” Alexia looked defeated as she came to.

“She did” Alba replied with a wicked grin on her face.

“But then she came back” Eli told the whole truth.

Alexia watched as her mum and sister stepped aside revealing you curled up on the chair fast asleep.

“I think the jet lag must have caught up with her. I saw the girl drink three double espressos but even they couldn’t help fight the urge to sleep” Eli explained.

Your girlfriend knew the battle all too well. She saw the way the time difference affected you when you travelled for international camp. Sleep always won in the end.

“Do you think she’ll forgive me?” Alexia asks her mother specifically only to earn a response from her sister.

“Of course she will. Y/N loves you and I’m talking the type of love dad had for mama. I think you’re stupid for not telling her but knowing you, you probably thought you were doing the right thing”

“No, she was being stupid” your raspy voice gained the attention of all three Putellas women.

“I was and I’m sorry”

You and Alexia were given some privacy.

“I am sorry Y/N, I didn’t mean to hurt you”

“What did you think would happen? I found out my girlfriend would be having surgery on twitter. Strangers found out the same time as me”

“I wanted you here with me but you needed to be with your family“

“I needed to be with you. I love you and nobody comes above you Ale.”

“But you were supposed to be in Australia. You had plans to spend new year in Sydney. It had been planned all year”

“You’re wrong Alexia. We were supposed to be in Australia. We had plans to spend new year in Sydney. We planned it together. I don’t care where I am as long as I am with you”

“I should have told you”

“Yes, you should have. Are you able to squeeze up? I’ve had enough of being mad at you”

Alexia knows that she’s strong enough to move and does so happily. She would do anything if it meant having you beside her. It came as no surprise that you were the little spoon in the relationship so Alexia naturally holds you close.

“I’m scared Y/N. This wasn’t supposed to happen. I had the surgery and I put in the work. I was back and now look at me. I’m back at the beginning again”

“No you’re not. This isn’t like it was before. Your knee is stronger now. I called the physio on my way to the airport and he told me everything. The surgery was only an investigation”

“Would you still loved me if I’m not as good as before? If I never win another balón d’Or?”

“Alexia Putellas Segura, what silly questions those are. I loved you long before you won your first and I will love you long after you hang up your boots. I fell for the person, not the player and you’ll do good to remember that”

Alexia took a moment to take in what you had said. Her greatest fear was that you’d leave her but deep down she knew that wouldn’t happen. Your words only reiterated this.

“Did you return the outfit? Nurse Y/N might be needed again”

You jokingly gasped at her suggestion. When you look up you see that her eyes have darkened slightly. She did love you in that criminally short costume.

“I think I have it somewhere” you cup her cheek and Alexia leans into your touch.

[impactrueno]

just saw your tweet from a few days ago where lydia offers marriage again in the third movie and bj goes “nope not falling for that one again” and i think it’s really funny

LMAO i wish i could say i came up with it but it's something i've seen a few people joke about and it's just so funny to imagine

she asks for his help once more and so she tries to strike another deal offering what she already knows he wants, and he's like "oh! :) yeah sure sure, let's shake on it," and when they go shake hands he goes "SIKE. ya ain't gonna fool me THRICE, who do you take me for?!"

"i— wh— okay, then...what do you want?"

"no ma'am. not making any more deals with you, go find another sucker 'cause i ain't doin' it."

"WHAT"

.......then again they say that third time's the charm....and 3 is his lucky number....but if he fails AGAIN it would be humiliating

i'm laughing just picturing a very indecisive and conflicted beetlejuice not knowing what to do but standing his ground at the same time. also lydia trying to convince him to help her, probably thinking to herself "how the hell did i get myself into this"

anyway. that's my pitch for beetlejuice 3. if either one of the warner brothers is reading my blog just know that i'm free this week......

[poketrnt]

because I am god damn sick and tired of ool being an absolute shitstain on my life, I'm gonna finally fucking just say what happened.

step.

by.

step.

the backstory

from around 02.10.2023 to 31.12.2023 I was a part of the group chat known as Epic Gamers, which had two of my friends and a guy I later befriended, those being Furret, Ool and Nexo.

on Christmas Eve a person joined, called Leon. However, a week later, I proceeded to leave the group related to a conflict between me and Leon. I still kept in contact with the three people I was friends with, despite Ool commenting in Epic Gamers about how I should shut up, attaching a screenshot of me trying to give him a normal ass compliment because he was playing a game I find cool

in that time I also had a semi-private server (let's call it Server A for this story, but since Ool trying to avoid a block will read this anyways (and because he said I was making shit up), I'm talking about the server with the Sledgehammer character), where Furret and another friend whom I'll call R were because I was going to test a simple Magic the Noah inspired not-really-chess game made in google slides

also this is the icon I was talking about

2. the god damn incident

on 05.02.2024 Nexo convinced me to try to end the beef between me and Leon. So, I tried to peacefully explain my points of view to Leon, but then I realised I was talking to a brick wall and proceeded to simply state I do not want to talk to him, which just caused him to start saying things that a person reaaally shouldn't say, as seen in the following screenshot, taken directly on that day

soon after I proceeded to go to sleep, but not before glancing at my phone to see a notification of Nexo saying something about an "EG raid" in Server A, when he in fact should not have been there. So, that night I just couldn't fall asleep because of how betrayed by Furret I felt.

as proof of Ool taking part in the raid, here's a screenshot taken by R who was still awake at the time

when I proceeded to wake up in the morning, I saw this message from Furret

losing someone whom I considered a friend up to this point was a heavy blow, but I lost three friends at once AND got trust issues

3. the harassment

so, like 2 weeks after that happened, I decided to go and finally speak up on Twitter, only to find that someone has decided to reply to every single tweet I've made with harassing messages

naturally, I've immediately blocked the person who made those replies, but they soon after made another account, and then another after it got blocked, and another.

later on I've found ool leaving messages on my personal Board Game Blitz wiki how I had used Furret's character (at the time of the character being added to the roster, I was still friends with Furret and had recieved his permission to do it. So, I simply just deleted the message and started planning a completely original character due to not wanting to be associated with Furret. But Ool decided to still harass me with more comments on the wiki, and later he proceeded to also raid some pages.

naturally by that point I was getting sick of all of them, but when I saw Ool and Leon trying to get in contact with me on Steam, for reasons I knew exactly, I decided to react calmly and do what I did before by blocking them both. However, a friend, whom I'll address as A, decided to get to the bottom of why Leon and Ool decided to be such scummy people

it was absolutely ridiculous, with Leon talking about how me saying that both Ool and him get hit by a truck and how I told him that I know 1s and 0s that are more human than him were death wishes. Which like, while the first one could theoretically be an argument, calling the second one a death wish was plain stupid.

also Leon was just trying to turn A against me which failed horribly and just cemented out entire group in the idea that the members of Epic Gamers are horrible people

later on Ool decided to try again on Roblox, because why the hell not, despite the fact he should have gotten the message I don't want to talk to him by then.

and now we're here. The point where Ool decided to invade my only safe place in all of this just to harass me some more and also try to make me look like a bad person

and to Ool, because I know he isn't gonna read through this all and will just skip to the end:

I know your life is pathetic enough that you don't have anything better to do other than harass the girl who you've been friend with at one point, but at least go and play some Minecraft instead of focusing your entire life on hate

[xx-psych0-rabbit-xx]

how do u see zan interacting with susie, magolor and marx

OH THIS IS FUNNN

first of all all instances we have of zan interacting w ppl consist of her insulting them (i think her form of insulting is so funny btw.she fully acknowledges others skills but seems all competitive abt it at the end n most of her nicknames arent even related to her competitive sore loser-ness.she just hates ppl anyways.why is she like this.) so im p sure she has the social skills of moldy cardboard

susie:i think zan would find her.the most tolerable? i mostly picture the mages interacting w wave 3, n she finds taranza (keeps trying to relate to her n his overly open emotional bonding is making her uncomfortable) n magolor (have had beef since childhood w each other)(more on that up ahead!) to be extremely obnoxious while susie doesnt comment on anything regarding her or tries being annoying on purpose, but ultimately zan sees susie as just "okay" bc she much prefers talking to her sisters, susie on the other hand has some.kinda lesbian fueled fascination? w her? she thinks she seems cool but pitiful but mean but naive but insane, faraway observation kinda crush, most of her attempts to make any moves completely fail bc zan doesnt understand anything shes trying to get at, i imagine the longer this goes on the worse susie is doing, ironically the more desperate she gets to get zan to get a hint the more calm zan gets around her bc as far as shes seeing things susie likes talking to her lol

tl dr susie rly wants this to be some epic yuri, zan thinks theyre acquaintances n that susie just has a tendency to say weird things like shes expecting a reply sometimes.if this yuri was successful theyd be that one image like "hi me n my girlfriend saw you from the other side of the club! n we like fucking HATE your vibe."

magolor:theres this one nifty theory magolor spent some amount of time at the jamba cult in the past, its a theory i borrow from my bestie n its been a while since shes explained it fresh to me, so if anyones interested i can always waterboard it until she explains it to me again so i can share it lol.anyways maggie spent some time as some kinda fourth sibling to the mages, i think zan liked him back then, shes a natural at being an older sister figure n she cherishes hyness n her sisters a lot in canon (only ppl shes affectionate towards n shes v expressive abt it), so she treated magolor similarly, till he either escaped or got the boot from hyness (i personally picture he was just obnoxiously curious? over questioning is a big deal in religion.so rly either realized this was a cult or hyness got tired of him), whereas shed just.grow to absolutely despise him bc thats betrayal of faith n betrayal of them to her, hyness wouldnt be happy w magolor specially n zan would see his word as the holy law, magolor seems to dislike the mages as well in a couple tweets, so i feel he also grew to dislike them, so they just.hate each other now they met again lol.magolor thinks pissing her off on purpose is hilarious n zan rly rly RLY wants to maim him.but kirby said they need to be friends so wtv.

tl dr zan thinks hes a heretic false believer guilty of blasphemy n apostasy, magolor thinks shes an annoying blind suck up to a stupid cult religion

marx:she has no.interest in him lol.she thinks hes a little funny at times (mostly when nobody else thinks its funny) (she also thinks puns r funny but dont tell anyone she said that) but mostly looks like pointless trouble also hes friends w magolor so thats 50 negative points immediately by association.

[beardedmrbean]

https://x.com/pandasandvidya/status/1770344837704786300?s=46

“We should have listened!”

Ooooh activists, you know that dark joke about rich white men go to Thailand to SA kids?

THE MAJORITY OF IT WAS ABOUT CEOS AND EXECUTIVES!!

Also we didn’t know…do you…do you people ever interact with working class people ESPECIALLY with the whole child sexual abuse discussionss

A lot of CSA survivors online pointed out how the abuse fuck them up. Then we started to relook at how a lot of child stars/actors with alarming similarities.

So we knew, we always fucking knew

Also this tweet as well

https://x.com/actually_tina/status/1770465227106353392?s=46

Fun fact a lot of children were pimped out by their MOTHERS rather than by strangers

Also the toddlers and tiaras shows where normal people were HORRIFIED by the way these mothers treat their kids

Or the “family” channels shitshhows

Because guess what?

That how Hollywood been since it foundation

Also why do they blame people like me? Bitch I was in Illinois or NC trying to make sure I was at the mercy of the MEGA CUNT of a stepmom and fighting tooth and nail despite the GOVERNMENT FUNDED foster care try to put me back there

Don’t you there put me in the same category as these monsters

Friend of mine watched all those, I'd asked him after finishing the last one if Dan Schneider had had any serious allegations cast his way or was it basically just being wildly inappropriate with jokes and the feet thing.

That's about all it was for him according to them.

Admittedly they may have missed something but not terribly likely, which sends me to the big question of why are they bringing him up instead of the guy that Drake Bell named or as well even.

There's a lot of systems in place that are supposed to ensure this kind of thing doesn't happen, sometimes they fail spectacularly, and people will always find ways around them as well.

Fun fact a lot of children were pimped out by their MOTHERS rather than by strangers Also the toddlers and tiaras shows where normal people were HORRIFIED by the way these mothers treat their kids Or the “family” channels shitshhows Because guess what? That how Hollywood been since it foundation

Kids were exploited long before Hollywood and terrible parents have been a thing forever, I mentioned Coogan's law before, Jackie (Uncle Fester) Coogan child star, made millions (law was codified in 1939 so 1930's millions not today millions) and his mom and stepdad had spent nearly all of it.

Short version is.

Money earned and accumulated under a contract under the code remains the sole legal property of the minor child. The law requires a child actor's employer to set aside 15% of the earnings in a trust (often called a Coogan Account) and codifies issues such as schooling, work hours, and time off.

That's not protecting anyone from SA it does limit the exploitation, except YT doesn't need to follow those rules as we see with the family accounts.

Some of which have good people doing them, but assholes exist everywhere.

Also why do they blame people like me? Bitch I was in Illinois or NC trying to make sure I was at the mercy of the MEGA CUNT of a stepmom and fighting tooth and nail despite the GOVERNMENT FUNDED foster care try to put me back there Don’t you there put me in the same category as these monsters

I think this is more the "royal" you, it's a someone should have tried to do something, which again I think most people were floored by what happened to Drake Bell and going after Dan for the foot thing and inappropriate jokes would have solved nothing.

McCurdy's mom still would have been a evil crone and the other dude would still be harming kids.

Most of the stuff I saw from Schneider yes not right for adult minor conversations, BUT they're also jokes nearly every adolescent has heard or told as well.

Again this is me not having heard anything major laid on Schneider, if there's something more serious then by all means we can tear into him with full force.

It's not on any of us, people in charge of production and the talent's agents and what not should have done a bit more due diligence. Don't think it was a big secret how Judy Garland was being treated but it's not like the public at large could do anything, short of boycotting her movies that is, and that would take a lot of people.

So much of all of this needs to be burned to the ground and rebuilt from scratch.

[bisluthq]

I think I’m sort of in the middle? Taylor knows the amount of hate her exes get when she does these things, it’s not like she’s unaware of her “power”. So in situations like this, and other stuff like the Ginny and Georgia tweet, it does feel like she wants her fans to actively hate on people. But at the same time, she’s built her whole career on sharing her experiences with people and that’s why people relate so much to her. She’s dialed that back so much since the earlier days, she doesn’t do the secret messages anymore. I saw a video the other day showing that debut had “to all the boys who thought they could break my heart, guess what? Here are 14 songs written about you. HA.”. She’s not doing that anymore, probably because she’s a 34 year old woman, but still. She’s clearly dialed that back and it doesn’t look like she’s actively trying to attack anyone. I don’t know where the line is between sharing your story and sending your fans to undeservingly attack your ex. I would also like to add that people exaggerated how good Joe was, he had to be the best at literally everything. If Joe didn’t complain about that, he can’t complain about people making him out to be worse than he actually is. It also makes sense that when Taylor put him on such a high pedestal (again, higher than he should’ve probably been), and then fans put him on an even higher one (Taylor mentioned many problems even in the good songs that I feel fans ignored), that the fall from it would be even bigger. Fans talk about him as if he betrayed them. They’re mad at him because they thought he was perfect and, since Taylor can do no wrong, they have to blame him for anything and everything that could have gone wrong. I think Taylor is at fault for making her fan base what it is, but she also couldn’t have possible known, as a petty 16 year old, that it would ever come to this. So idk, there are some things she might be able to do, but I don’t think they would help that much

I agree with literally EVERYTHING you’ve said (except that there are things she can do bc idk what those would be lol). The reason I was personally so invested in T/J is the songs NEVER made him - or her - out to be perfect and it felt like such a real relationship that was so wonderfully open to us. She made it very clear IN THE SONGS that he’s moody, that he gets cold sometimes and pulls away, that he can be a little sanctimonious and that he can be a little flirtatious with other girls but it never goes further than that. That’s all in the lyrics. And those aren’t great qualities but like come on, you’re never gonna find someone perfect and for 6.5 years-ish it worked. She also made it clear that she’s moody and temperamental and overreacts to shit, that she wants to be acknowledged for the goddess that she is (which imo she is but like I see why when you’re living with her you wouldn’t necessarily feel that way every day), that she takes a lot of things super personally, that she’s petty and a lil basic and that she’s got a whole host of other issues. That’s ALL like FROM HER LYRICS. That’s WHY I was invested in that relationship. Because it was the first time I heard an artist in real time speak through something that was weird and complex and flawed but obviously beautiful??? And I did kinda feel like a friend lol ngl because she shared so much. It almost felt like my friend K’s relationship (the one that kinda set me up with my now bf like she introduced us not expecting a romantic connection but lol neither were we - she was just like “I know you two would have fun together because you’re so similar”) where I constantly think they’re about to break up but I also wouldn’t be shocked if they outlast my bf and me because we… have our own cockroaches in our heads and shit lol and we’re both very temperamental people and like we say this is forever (hence the bracelets) but like what is forever lol yk? He’s tried forever before and failed and I’m personally not willing to commit to that.

fans chose to ignore the lyrics and focus on her telling sessioners he’s the perfect boyfriend which like… should remind fans that sessioners aren’t her friends lol. No one is perfect. She wasn’t claiming he is in the music - which imo is very honest from her POV and that’s why *I* love her. She obviously wasn’t going around claiming that to her friends (“I talk shit with my friends”). But like when she met with randoms wtf else do you want her to say??? Do you meet random people and tell them like “my partner is ok for the most part like I’ll stay but he/she pisses me off sometimes”?

as for connecting all this to teen Taylor idk what you expect lol like do u want a teenage girl to like… not hate her exes??? Especially ones who cheated on her (Samx6) or who moved on really quick (not domestic violence Drew)?? Like obvi she was pissed off and she didn’t expect it to get to… this when she was lol.

but yeah I agree with your thesis and like idk Swifties are weird and if you listen to the music and like apply it to your life she makes the best music in the world imo. I’m not as invested in T/TK as T/J yet because I don’t have the music. It’s the music that really makes me love her. If you don’t love her music or don’t understand it and just like harass her exes like that’s ok the internet is a wild place go ahead but idk if you’re a fan of the music/artist or you’re just a weird person on the internet (of whom there are many).

[gemperception]

A letter to the new supply

Dear Replacement,

I’ll start with you, because you’re kind of the least important person I need to address. I sincerely tried to protect you in the beginning. A stranger at the time, but a person still regardless so I treated you as such. I knew that he saw a weakness in you and decided to prey. It disgusted me to know that he was only pursuing you to harm me.

I warned you initially thinking that you would hear me and run. I was trying to stop him from creating triangulation. Triangulation is a narcissist biggest chess move. He did it me for majority of our relationship, he could not his ex go. But my efforts failed. After my second warning to you, I could tell that something was off. So I confronted him and poor you… you allowed my abuser to fuck you. So from that point, I knew that you were now his new victim and he had succeeded. I saw disgusting messages about me between you guys. It’s so twisted because as he was texting you how much he couldn’t stand me. He was begging for hugs and cuddles from me and the same time. So sick. I also learned that you were watching my twitter and saw you were just as mean as him. You tried to retract some of those tweets and lie about them being about me (such a coward thing to do, because I was definitely talking about you and admitted it). Either way it surprised me and hurt that you didn’t have the sentiments as a woman. I was so busy fussing at him “Why are lying to that poor woman?! Why can’t you stop playing with people?” But little did I know that his campaign smearing, love bombing, and dick was so successful that you decided to talk dog shit about me. I was just his crazy ex girlfriend to you.

But ask yourself why would you ignore the red flags? How desperate are you for love where it includes this? Where it takes you being lied to multiple times already and you had only known him for a few weeks.

Then you wanted clarification. I went out of my way to it all while I’m still very triggered and trying to cope with the situation. I had that conversation for you. Because Darling I needed no clarity, remember love I warned you. Anyway during that conversation, we matched up so many discrepancies and it ended with you boldly proclaiming how you want to support him. Also how you hope he doesn’t hurt you and finds out he’s playing you this whole time. ?????

So after a hour of aligning discrepancies, you still want to support a man who’s clearly playing you? Desperation must be what you are or just plain old delusional thinking. Also suggesting that your abusive ex might be nicer to his new partner… to insinuate that my abusive ex is nicer to you… was rich comedy. Because again we just sat here and laid it all out love. I really left that conversation saying “I’ve never met a more delusional woman in my life, I thought I was crazy. It took me 5 years to wake up from his manipulative hold and she just basically told me that it’s because they’re meant to be. Wtf?”

I did leave that conversation telling you that I don’t support your relationship with him. Because why would I support my abuser, and also because girl fuck you.

Love, Michaela <3

[popopretty]

The Day I Picked Up Dazai - Side B (2)

Links to Parts: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Final

This is the translation from page 11 to page 18 of Side B of the Dazai novel which was given out as free bonus for those who come to the cinema to watch the BEAST live action movie in Japan.

I HIGHLY recommend you to read Side A first before moving on to this one, especially part 2-5 for more context, better understanding, and easier comparison between the two sides. You can find the link to the tag with all Side A translations I have done in my pinned post.

Please also carefully read the notes below before progressing. - This post contains spoilers. If you plan to read the novel later yourself and think this would ruin your expectation, please stop here.

· I tried to keep the translation as accurate as possible, but as I don’t speak English or Japanese as my native language, I may make some mistakes or use weird words etc. This translation might not be final. I may come back and fix it later if I find any mistakes.

· This is a moviegoers-only benefit, so please be extra careful when discussing it about on Twitter. Use a #spoilers tag on your tweets or your fanarts. You can share the links to this post but don’t take many screenshots.

· Don’t retranslate it. [UPDATE MAY 9, 2023] You can retranslate it but please keep in mind that my translation is not perfect and some meanings will be lost through re-translation. If you are not sure about the meaning at any part, please let me know! Don’t repost this translation anywhere else out of Tumblr.

· DON’T GO TO THE AUTHORS’ OR OFFICIAL TWITTERS TO COMMENT ABOUT THE CONTENTS OF IT.

I’m sorry if that’s too much but honestly all I want is for everyone to have a good experience, for those who wants to read the novels to be able to read the novels, and for those who don’t want to be spoiled, to be safe from it as much as possible.

If you have read and are okay with all the above, please continue to move forward and enjoy the novel. Have a good day!

...

The time the police appear at my house, is one of those times.

“Excuse me, we are from S River Station. Someone reported seeing a man covered in blood collapsing in this neighborhood. Can we ask you a few things?”

Through the window designed for lighting on the door, I see male figures. Two of them.

I freeze. I am in the middle of boiling water to make coffee in the kitchen at that time.

“Excuse me. This is the police. Is anyone home?”

The unreserved knocking shakes the door again and again. I glance at the young man. The young man whose name I don’t know. He is not showing any human-like reaction even to the voices outside.

What will happen if they find him? I quickly think. In all probability, this guy has been involved in some kind of criminal activities. And he is also seeing and committing crimes like breathing… Someone from the other side, the side of the night. Otherwise, there is no way someone who had been shot all over his body like that would not have gone to the hospital. In other words, the cops will see him as a treasure, instead of an injured person. So that they can improve their arrest record.

On the other hand, I haven’t committed any crime so far. I just took care of an injured person I saw. It is the duty of a citizen to report as soon as they find someone with gunshot wounds, but if I tell them, “I didn’t realize it was caused by gun”, the cops will have no choice but to back down. Like, I thought he was stabbed or something. It is not that difficult to identify a gunshot wound, but there is currently no crime defined in the criminal law for failing to do so.

In other words, even if I sell this young man to the cops, I can walk away without any claim.

I walk to the front door. To talk to the cops.

I will come up with an excuse to send them away. I think so. If I am going to sell this young man here and now, I would not have treated his wounds in the first place.

But that stupid dedication of mine can’t be achieved. Something completely out of my expectation has happened. The young man rushes to the door.

He is ridiculously fast. Like a tightly shrunken spring being released in an instant. He slams open the front door and attacks the cops.

It is an unpredictable action for everyone. It never crosses my mind that he can possess such agility. He leaps with a speed no one can expect from an injured person, and jumps onto the shoulder of the surprised cop, before sinking his fingers into the man’s face.

The cop lets out a brief scream. He goes berserk and slams the young man against the wall near the doorway. But still the youth doesn’t let him go. He clings onto the cop in a piggyback position, and shoves the fingers on both of his hands into the man’s ears. He put all the strength in as if he is trying to rip his ears apart. From the young man’s throat comes a fierce roar of a beast. He pulls his fingers out. The fingertips are soaked in blood. He thrusts them in again.

The cop uses his free arms to grab his attacker’s body and falls into the room just like that. The wooden floor makes a cracking sound as it breaks.

The slightly younger cop who isn’t attacked finally pulls out his gun as if he just remembers it now. That is a swing-out double-action revolver. He aims it at the young man.

No warning is made. I see the future where that gun is fired.

I start to move too. I approach the cop and grab his pistol. I slide my thumb between the barrel and the firing pin. This way, the firing pin won’t be able to hit the primer and the bullet will not come out.

I look at the cop. He looks back at me angrily.

There is a light sound of something dropping behind my back.

Something metallic. I want to look back but I am in a bad position. My right hand is holding the gun. The wall is on my left. I cannot turn around. This is bad.

Something white is weaving at the edge of my vision.

I didn’t see the moment that thing was thrown. But it is probably the cop who threw it. Because I don’t stock such dangerous things at home. A gas grenade.

That is a black, cylindrical personal weapon. It emits non-lethal coma gas. It lasts for twelve seconds, and can emit 2.8 kiloliters of gas. This gas was once used as a substitute for anesthesia for surgery in the Great War. Those who inhale it will find their consciousness fading away. It depends on the concentration of the gas, but generally most will faint before they can even count to ten. If inhaled in large volume, it can be fatal.

I grab my mouth and nose with my hand. Then I try to find the young man. A gas grenade is not something city police officers can carry around on patrol.

These guys are not cops.

But something is moving at the edge of my vision. The younger cop has let go of his gun and thrown himself at me.

We tangle together and fall onto the floor. He hits my chest so hard that all the air left in my lung is pushed out.

The white smoke wriggles in and fills my vision as I roll on the floor. It is as if I have fallen into the bottom of a white sea. But I can only see that white for a short moment.

I cough, breathe in the gas and lose consciousness almost instantly.

***

There is a sound.

A cold and damp sound.

It is so familiar that it does not sound like a meaningful sound at first. It is a sound that will slip past your consciousness, like the sound of dead leaves rolling, or a train passing by in a distance, that kind of noise. However, it cannot be the same as those noises.

Because it is the sound of Oda Sakunosuke being beaten.

The sound is low and muffled. It does not sound dangerous. It sounds like a sand bag falling. But it is, in fact, a dangerous sound.

Dazai knows that.

Because he has been living with it soaking up to his throat for a dauntingly long amount of time.

“Before we start, let me tell you this.” said a voice. The voice of an aged man.

“I don’t like violence.”

The man is holding a blackjack as he speaks. Dazai sees that. Dazai is looking at the man. He is looking hard at him. Through those sharp and dark eyes behind the face hidden by bandages.

“I don’t like it when people use violence. I don’t like to use it either. So just think about this as business.”

The club is swung down. On the back of the tied up Odasaku. Dazai is staring at that.

Dazai is standing in the corridor of the bunker, where it is completely dark. The distance between him and Odasaku is more than ten meters. Because of the darkness and the distance, Odasaku and the other guy cannot see Dazai. In fact, they wouldn’t even notice Dazai if he came within an arm’s reach. That is how much Dazai has melt into a dense shadow and become one with the darkness himself.

Dazai is looking. He is simply looking hard at Odasaku being beaten.

The club being swung down. Odasaku groaning.

Seeing that violence doesn’t even make his eyes move. His eyes are as still as those of a dead man, not showing the slightest flicker of emotion.

However, every time the club goes down, Dazai’s fingers twitch. His joints automatically jump and his muscles tense up. And every time, thin white streaks rise to the surface of his fingers. His fingers bend as if they are grasping something invisible. It is as if he himself is being beaten.

Dazai has become one with the darkness. That is why no one is able to find Dazai.

However, the elder torturer reacts to the killing intention he emits, which pulsates with every downswing of the club.

“Who is that?”

The man turns around toward the darkness. He can’t see anything. The darkness is deep and dense as mud.

He stops the torture and walks out, to check if anyone is there. Because he cannot help it. Because his experience is giving him a warning.

He finally reaches the place where Dazai was.

However, there is already no one there.

There is only darkness. As if no one was there from the beginning. It’s as if darkness has taken the form of Dazai, and has finally turned back to the original darkness and disappeared.

The man is confused. There is only the unchanging, endless darkness that has been there since the beginning of time.

...

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

I’m sorry if you already discussed this, what are your thoughts on the narrative "BTS has been/is being mistreated by the music industry" that goes around in the fandom? as much as I am a fan, and I do see some eyebrow-raising stuff + obvious examples of racism and ostracism, I feel like this idea of "Bangtan against the world/they’re been sabotaged" sounds lowkey conspiracy-ish at times. Are they really? Maybe I’m naive, I don’t know. I’m especially lost when it comes to streams and platforms such as Spotify/YT filtering the streams. I mean, the fandom is so huge now and people are playing songs on repeat for the sake of it, it does not seem like a really faire competition to me… they’re not the only ones doing this for sure as it seems to be a common thing in kpop fandoms but it seems like a taboo topic to question it… I guess I’m too old for this, lol (33 yo), i don’t get why people are so obsessed with the ranking and it seems like it keeps feeding the idea that it’s Army the savior of poor mistreated BTS against the whole mean industry (which is probably a pithole anyway). Every time I’ve tried to introduce my friends around my age to kpop, the first thing they always say is that they have a bad image on the genre because the fans are completely unhinged which does not make the music very welcoming unfortunately. I find it sad that fans don’t realize that they’re actually probably doing more harm than good.

Anon 2

My god, BMT, have you seen the whole Spotify/Lisa/ARMY fiasco on Twitter? When will these fans accept the fact that BTS aren’t victims—haven’t been for a long time—and they don’t need ARMYs protection? Then again, of course the behavior will continue when BTS encourage (James Cordon, “got ARMYs right behind us when we say so”, blah blah blah). It’s embarrassing and disgusting 💀

I've said times multiple times and nothing happened to change my mind as of today, but Army is still victimizing BTS because it's an integral part of the fandom's raison d'etre. They need to fight, they need to be the savior. And how many times have I not seen I-Army calling out the Korean fans for not streaming enough which once again, is done as a way to put themselves on this superior position in which the foreigner knows best and is the only one able to save and truly love an uplift this Korean group. But this overall mentality is found across the board. Of course it's dumb.

I saw the tweets for the past two days and honestly, it looks like desperation to me, for something that truly doesn't make any sense. Army is still there in the trences for an imaginary war that has long been won already and they are on the winning side, except they don't want to recognize it because without that war, they have no purpose. In 2022, is BTS a group dependent on streams? Really? Is that a main concern? They made it. They made a long time ago, which only makes this even more ridiculous. For this fandom, numbers will always matter most and not the quality of music, despite preaching that it's the most important aspect they're interested about and the reason why they "stan" BTS. Except they fail or won't admit that this is also about them and how they're in competition with every single person on this planet who is not BTS or BTS-approved.

They make BTS as victims when these so-called victims get to have a stage at Lollapalooza, debut one song on a stadium tour in Argentina, sing at the World Cup and without being a well established solo artist, a place at NPR Tiny Desk. Those are opportunities that came because as a group, they reached a certain level of success and fame that opens those types of doors. They are not debuting a solo song on Music Bank, but on world stages. And somehow, they still need a fandom to fight insignificant battles.

[tainted-wine]

Primal Dissonance

Hawks x Reader (NSFW)

So anon was like:

And since I’m total ass at writing short drabbles, or maybe it’s because they called me senpai, I ended up with a whole-ass fic. This took a different route than planned but I hope you enjoy, anon!

Words: 4.3k

Warnings: Dubcon, Pheromones, Mindbreak, Feral Hawks, Rough and Public Sex, Tit Abuse. This totally isn’t as dark as it sounds.

--------x--------

Hawks has been getting noisy. Not in the usual sense; he’s always a motormouth. No, he’s been making sounds that you’ve never heard him make.

At first you thought he was sick and something was irritating his throat, but on one occasion when you offered him water after hearing the sound, he almost looked offended. You concluded that it wasn’t an illness.

You later noticed that the noise often happens when it’s just the two of you together. During late night movie viewings at his place, he’d hold you close and release a constant hum, the vibrations from his chest and wings soothing enough to make you drift into sleep in his arms. You never saw the look of disappointment in his face as he decided to cuddle you for the rest of the night.

Just a few days later, he spots you during one of his patrols and presents you with a surprise expensive gift. A ruby pendant, the same brilliant shade as his feathers, was placed around your neck by gentle gloved hands.

“Hawks—why—what did I do to deserve this?” You asked while your eyes reflected the gemstone’s sparkles.

“Just wanted to give a pretty gift to my pretty girl.” He gave you a kiss, and waves of soft hums leave his mouth and into yours, flowing through your body, stimulating all of your nerves and triggering pleasant shivers. One makeout session later, and you both pull back to lock eyes. He’s looking at you expectantly, but you don’t even know what the hell he’s expecting.

You look to the side awkwardly. “Thank you, Hawks. It’s beautiful, but I…don’t have anything to give in return. This was a complete surprise, after all.”

His eye twitches, but he smiles and embraces you. “That’s fine, chickadee.”

A pigeon appears during your hug, and the soft coos emanating from it give you an epiphany.

“A pigeon! That’s what it is! You’re cooing like a pigeon!”

This time it’s his smile that twitches. Did you say something wrong? Whatever it is, he brushes it off with a half-hearted laugh. “Yeah, I guess I do.”

That was also the day you noticed his rising body temperature. You asked once again if he was feeling ill, and at least this time he didn’t appear to be upset when he answered ‘no.’

On the next night you spent in his home, he—and you’re still not over this—took your hand and pulled you in for a dance. It wasn’t some silly jig in which he blindly moved to a random pop song, it was a slow classic love song, and he moved both of you in an elegant dance fitting for a ballroom.

It was the last thing you expected from the hero that normally took you on KFC dates or, if he had the time, reserve a spot at his favorite yakitori place. But there was no way you could say that you didn’t like the way his feet glided across the floor, wings acting as a living cape that made each of his movements look all the more graceful, and you followed his pace as best as you could.

You clung onto him more tightly than intended when he dipped you after a spin, sharp avian eyes boring into you before he buries his face in your neck, and that’s when you feel more than hear the cooing return. It’s a tune that never fails to make you feel so warm and safe; you have no idea how his gentle sounds have such influence over you.

He looks pleased by your relaxed state, pulling you back up and brushing a few stray hairs out of your face. “So?”

You smiled and gave him a quick peck on the lips. “I didn’t know you had such grace, Hawks. Now hurry up, or we’re going to miss the movie for tonight!”

You scampered off into the kitchen to prepare the popcorn, completely oblivious to the baffled look your boyfriend was giving behind your back.

A few days later and you’re more certain than ever that he’s coming down with something, because now there’s a constant sheen of sweat all over his skin, and his breath sounded labored even when he was just sitting around. Since he ignores all of your pleas to stay home for just a day or two, you come up with another solution. Hawks pouts like a child when you tell him that a little nature and clean air might restore his health, but he still accepts your offer for a date at a nature park because hey, spending a day in natural beauty with you sounds great.

You practically dragged him into a bus after telling him several times that he shouldn’t tire himself out prematurely by flying both of you there. One long scenic drive later, you both arrive at your beautiful destination. The park was huge and lush with flora of all kinds, from tree-filled paths to endless flower fields.

Exploring everything this paradise has to offer with Hawks sounds like a dream, but your main goal was to loosen him up and help him feel better, so you avoided the populated areas, passing the cycling roads, the play areas, the bug houses, all of the charming attractions until you reached the long stretches of vibrant colors. The flower park.

You and Hawks began a slow stroll hand-in-hand, taking in the seemingly endless blooms, the trees shedding petals onto the walkway—all of it served as the most delicious treat for your eyes.

But when you looked at the winged hero to see if he was enjoying the scenery as much as you were, you saw that he was staring at you. His face was slightly flushed, but you couldn’t tell if it was the result of his feverish temperature or if he’s finding this whole date very romantic.

“The flowers are over there, birdbrain,” you joked with a squeeze of his hand.

His wing wrapped around you and pulled you in closer, encasing you in his abnormal heat. “The only flower that matters is right here.” There was a rough breathlessness to his voice that made the otherwise corny line sound sensual.

And then the coos returned, bringing you back to that pleasant world where everything was warm, soft, and safe. The red feathers surrounding you quivered and rippled like ocean waves of scarlet. You were supposed to be making him feel at ease here, not the other way around.

A chorus of chirps snapped you out of your stupor. You broke out of the hypnotic embrace and spot a bunch of small bouncing figures in the white lilac tree in front of you. “Aww, look at all of the little tits, Hawks!” You point at the flock of singing critters.

Hawks snorted immaturely.

Before you could withdraw your arm, one of the Japanese tits flew over and perched on your still-extended finger, leaving you bug-eyed and your mouth agape. “Hi there! You’re a brave little guy, aren’t you?” You said softly, hoping not to startle it. It tweeted in response, fluffing up its black and white plumage as it looked up at you curiously. “Hawks! It’s so cute!”

Red wings bristled, but you were too enamored with the friendly bird on your hand to even look back at your boyfriend. It continued to sing, the tits sitting in the tree joining in to create an adorable medley of chirps, tweets, and peeps. “Such a nice sound, I never realized how amazing these little guys are.” You keep watching the beady eyes that stare right back at you, feeling the bird’s little feet move quickly as it adjusted itself to get more comfortable.

And with a powerful slug from a hardened red feather out of nowhere, the tiny tit is knocked off of your finger and sent flying like a fucking golf ball.

Your pointing hand was still out as you looked on, eyes and mouth now wide open in horror instead of awe. The poor bird managed to right itself before it hit the ground, flapping frantically to ride the light breeze and fly past its tree of brethren and off into the distance, its sloppy turns and sudden drops betraying how dazed it was.  

With your short-lived friend out of your sight, you turned to the man that ruined your magical bonding session, multiple negative emotions boiling inside you and ready to spill right onto this bastard. “Hawks!” You’re prepared to blow his ears off with every ounce of frustration, every concern that’s been plaguing you for the past week thanks to the strange changes that he refuses to talk about, but then you freeze.

The man’s face has darkened, eyes narrowed with its pupils shrunken into beady slits, lips pressed together in a tight frown—he looked enraged. But the terrifying look wasn’t directed at you, he was looking up at the innocent tits still residing in the tree and paying no mind to the violent treatment of one of their own. As his wings slowly spread with feathers sharpened, your chest constricted once you realized what was about to happen.

“Stop!” You threw yourself at him, grabbing at the outstretched limbs in a pitiful attempt to stop them, the bladed edges cutting your hands. It was still enough to shock and prevent him from launching any of the deadly weapons at the birds. You felt his feathers return to their soft fluffy state as he stumbled from your weight. “What the hell are you doing? What, are you pissed that it chose my hand instead of yours? The hell is wrong with you?”

Now he was aiming the glare at you, and you couldn’t help but shrink under the intimidation. His voice was shockingly low. “Just what game are you playing at here? Gushing over another bird’s song right in front of me?”

You eyed his still-expanded wings as you tried to make sense of what he said. “What?” Was all you could say.

“Here I was thinking you just had extremely high standards, but maybe you’re the type that likes to play hard to get, or make your guy jealous and see how he handles it.” He took a step toward you, and you took one back. “Well let me tell you, I’m not handling it very well.”

What he was implying would have made you burst into laughter if he didn’t look so threatening right now. “You’re…jealous? Of the bird that was on my finger?”

He laughed, or at least tried to, but the shortness of breath made him cough. The sudden anger must be worsening whatever has been making him hot and throaty for the past days. He needs to calm down for his own damn sake. “I guess I shouldn’t be, should I? Not for a girl who gets wet over any bird that does something as simple as approach her.”

“Excuse me?” Did you hear that correctly? No joke, did you really hear that shit correctly?

Hawks just keeps on going, taking your bewilderment as more mockery. “I give you something shiny, you don’t say anything.” A flash of several feathers and you feel your arms being pulled in front of you, the red tufts tying your wrist together.

“I put on a nice dance I practiced for, and you don’t say anything. Did you even notice that I cleaned and decorated the room that night?” You’re panicking from your tied hands and don’t see him fire another barrage that goes for your ankles, their tugs forcing you to lose your balance and fall hard onto the ground with a pained cry. Your hands are forcefully pinned above your head. “Hell, you seem to enjoy my song every time you hear it, so what’s the deal?”

While your heart is on the verge of exploding from its anxious beats, the gears in your head are spinning as you try to figure out how exactly this whole miscommunication even happened, but they keep jamming, filling your head with sparks and smoke of pure confusion. “What song? You haven’t been singing anything!” You yell as you fight against the feather-made cuffs around your hands and feet, but there was no breaking free. They suddenly felt as strong and durable as elastic metal.

Hurt flashes across his face and you don’t understand why goddammit, but it’s quickly masked with another scowl. “You mean the song that’s lulled you to sleep? The song that never fails to put you at ease every time? I can sense it, you know. How calm and pleased you feel whenever you hear it. I know it’s not the loud obnoxious tune of a songbird,” he glances at the tree that continues to emanate various calls as he kneels over you, nearly straddling your waist. Smart of him to keep his groin out of the range of your knees. “But you still enjoy it, right? I’m not too upset that you compared it to a shitty pigeon.”

You only stutter in shaky breaths as he lowers himself and presses all of his weight onto you, your eyes shut as he nuzzles your face lovingly. He feels like a furnace, the sweat from his face slathering onto yours from his rough rubs.

That’s when you smell something potent. You’ve picked up traces of it from him throughout the week, a strange but not unpleasant mixture of salt and sweet. You assumed it to be some sort of shampoo or cologne, but now it’s hitting you full force and it’s making your body…respond. With each inhale, the exotic scent sends a tingle down your abdomen and a release of wetness that dampens your clothing. What the hell is happening to you?

Hawks pulls away and sniffs the air. Your feminine aroma has him moan so suggestively that it makes your core heat up even more. “Oh, so this is getting you going?” He questions in a judgmental tone before something appears to cross his mind, and he laughs with a slap to his forehead. “I’m such an idiot. I’ve been doing this all wrong, haven’t I? You’re not a bird.” He kisses at the side of your face and licks the shell of your ear before whispering, “You’re a mammal. You don’t choose a mate by their pretty gifts or fancy dances.”

The lustful haze invading your mind almost distracts you from whatever is tugging at your pants and pulling them down. “H-Hawks…” You accidentally moaned. You were too out of it to even properly convey your worry. Your pants are removed and something tickles your hips to remove your panties next—that’s when you identify them as more feathers.

“With mammals, males just take what they want. They catch her, hold her down, and fuck her on the spot.”

You gasp when your lower body is completely stripped and exposed—a mistake—Hawks’s intoxicating smell rushes into your mouth and nostrils, making you clench and gush. He lifts himself just enough for the living binds around your wrists to pull and drag you off of the stone walkway and into the blooming batches. The flowers were just tall enough to probably hide you from anyone at a distance, but the winged man crawling over and sitting in front of your feet would easily give you away. “Hawks, someone…might see us,” you mutter.

He only chuckles. “Good, I want them to see. Are you little bastards watching?” He looks up at the lilac tree that now looms right over both of you. The resting tits have gone quiet, most likely intimidated by the large bird-human hybrid that continued to glare at them.

The response was ridiculous enough to temporarily free you from your trance. “I’m not worried about the birds, you dumbass.”

“Hmph, of course you’re not. You’d let them all join in if I’d let you, wouldn’t you?”

You have so many questions about how that would even work.

But you’re interrupted by the feathers around your ankles pulling your feet apart, easily overcoming your resistance and spreading you wide open for the hero in front of you. You have to look away from just how soaked you are, juices flowing from your swollen pussy and onto the soft soil, some of it sticking to your parted thighs in strands. The sight makes Hawks salivate.

“I’m at the peak of my rut and I’m tired of waiting. Gonna make you mine.”

It’s all he says before his entire mouth is on your cunt, tearing a startled cry from your throat. The peaceful sounds of the wind and rustling leaves are overshadowed by the absolutely filthy slurps, sucks, and growls between your legs. He was being a greedy savage that simply wanted to drink you up. There were no careful methods or patterns, just a hungry tongue that lapped at every inch of you and lips that sucked on anything they could grip.

You could barely even writhe from the onslaught, what with your arms pinned over your head and your feet held down so strongly that you couldn’t even move them across the dirt. You kept your sights on the rich colors of various flowers that encircled you as the sweet-smelling haze enveloped you again, enhancing your pleasure. Despite Hawks’ sudden loss of his oral skills, the feral nature of it all—the smothered snarls against your sex, the startling feel of his teeth carelessly grazing your sensitive flesh, and the lewd sight of his face covered in your glistening juices as his glassy eyes opened and stared into yours as he ate you alive—his voracity had you boiling over.

He gulped your essence loudly, welcoming every drop of the orgasmic flood into his mouth. All of the colors in your vision blurred more with each mind-numbing pulse. You weren’t even aware of the shameless wails that left you until the blissful waves finally subsided.

Once he had his fill, he finally pulled away from your mound and boy did he look like a hot mess. His cheeks were a deep red that was slowly spreading across his cum-covered face, a beady string of your fluids hanging from his lips before dripping off. He was climbing back over you and when the fuck did he take his pants off? He must have unbuttoned and removed them while he was licking you into heaven.

He still manages to look smug while he takes in your spent form, your slightly parted lips impossible to resist. Your mouth was suddenly locked with his, the breath you were desperately trying to get back stolen from you. And then the scent returns, this time accompanied with a powerful salted lemon flavor that assaults your taste buds. The taste of your own pussy was insignificant; his aroma in both your nose and mouth is nearly suffocating, your still-recovering inner walls already squeezing out more of your slick.

His tongue thrashes about in your mouth to paint his sweet saliva on every spot he could reach. You swallow it up thirstily and feel an immediate response in your throat that somewhat frightens you. Numbness overtakes your mouth and your throat relaxes completely; you felt like it was suddenly impossible to choke.

Hawks messily pulls away, breathing heavily and licking his lips. “Look at you. All it takes is a whiff and taste of a rutting male to turn you into a submissive little bitch.” You’ve never heard him speak like that, but like every action he’s taken since you’ve been at his mercy, it doesn’t fail to arouse you for reasons you still don’t understand. “Do you want some more? Hmm?”

You’re nodding before your crippled mind can comprehend the question.

The drugged kiss has you dizzy. You’re doing your best to keep track of his movements as he straddles your chest, his cock coming into focus and pressing against your lips. He doesn’t give you a command, you simply open up like a trained whore.

You’re moaning from the addicting taste of his length that pushes all the way to the back of your throat. Once his pubes are flush against your nose, your eyes roll back and you lose all sense of…everything. Everything except for that exhilarant fragrance and flavor.

Even as he begins to move in your mouth, your tongue swirls all around the sweet meat in an attempt to taste him all over. You’re throbbing wildly, but the feathers prevent you from bringing your thighs together for some much needed friction.

He was thrusting in and out at a pace that should have you gagging, but you take the pounding smoothly. Everything was murky, save for the pleasure that was slowly consuming you. You think the birds are singing again, maybe.

Something was smacking against your chin…rather loudly, you think. Hawks’s balls. How obscene, the way he’s hunched over you and fucking your face so roughly, but it’s hard to feel embarrassed when it’s all making you feel so damn good. Drool gathers and drips down your mouth. Your throat has become a second pussy, and he was fucking it like one.

The scent has your entire body on fire and you wish so badly that you could touch yourself. It was too powerful, each breath filling you with more burning tension. Your desperate whines came out as bubbly gurgles around his hammering dick. Your climax is dangling right at the edge. All you need is just the smallest touch on your drenched, deprived pussy.

His thick intrusion suddenly leaves your mouth, allowing oxygen to properly enter your lungs and for the pooling saliva to be swallowed. Hawks says something as you cough and sputter, but everything is still too muffled.

“Good……….not yet……….finish inside.” That was all that you were able to catch. You frankly don’t care. You immediately want his overpowering scent back.

When something pushes past the entrance between your legs, you cum instantly. Your scream is silent, or maybe you just can’t hear it, as your restrained limbs twitch like mad from the excruciatingly pleasurable contractions.

You’re already being fucked roughly while you’re still coming down from your orgasmic high. You’re rocked against the flowers and the soft earth beneath, your peaceful surroundings a stark contrast to the raunchy act currently taking place among them.

Hawks leans in once again, and you have to turn away and hold your breath because you truly felt like one more whiff of that mouth-watering smell would bring you the most euphoric death. His mouth drew closer to your ear, harsh pants in sync with his rapid thrusts. There’s no way a body was meant to handle so much stimulation, yet you didn’t want it to end.

You wanted this powerful man and everything that he had. You want him to fill your womb with his seed…bear his strong and healthy offspring…then let him take you all over again…

There’s a soft rumble that brings you back down to earth, clearing your mind just enough so that all of your senses work properly again. The smudged colors return to their original shapes, and the cooing that vibrates through both of your bodies can be heard loud and clear. His song.

“That’s it, baby. I’ve got you right here. Just give in to me.” Hawks sounds on the verge of losing his voice, weak and graveled, but his singing and hips aren’t letting up.

Finally, fucking finally, the feathers release your limbs. Ignoring how boneless they feel, you use all of your strength to wrap your arms tightly around his neck, and your legs lock right above his ass. You cling onto him like a parasite and moan freely, trusting his low and soft vocals to keep you grounded as his citrus aura captivates you again.

Your involuntary clenches ruin him and take him to his peak, several more hard and deep pumps bringing you to your final climax. Both of you cry out loudly enough to scare away the tits still resting in the tree, the small flock flying off to find a quieter perch.

--------------------

Good. That showed the little bastards.

Hawks smiled triumphantly as the small birds fled the erotic scene. Once he was certain that none of them were coming back, he returned his attention to you. Your chest heaved with each audible breath, your entire body drenched in sweat, just like his. He laid a gentle hand on your cheek, thumb stroking lovingly as you close your eyes for much-needed rest after almost losing your mind.

He did it. He finally claimed you, and all he had to do was just show a little dominance…and expose you to a hefty dose of pheromones. It was clearly way more than you could handle—maybe the face-fucking wasn’t the best idea, but it looked like you were enjoying yourself enough. No harm done.

“Excuse me, sir?”

Hawks was a cool-headed man. He’s managed to stay calm and collected in the direst of situations. Still, when he slowly turns around to see a man dressed in the park’s staff uniform, blushing at the sight of a sweaty couple with no pants on among the innocent blossoms, he can’t help but feel just a wee bit fucked.

“H-Hawks? It’s really you? Wha-?” The poor guy is lost for words from the fact that he just found the number 2 hero banging someone in public.

Eh, he’s talked his way out of tighter spots.

With a smile, the winged hero sends a few feathers to his discarded pants and withdraws a pen from its pockets.

“How about a deal, buddy? An autograph from yours truly and a coupon for my merch. All you gotta do is walk away and forget what you just saw.”

[sashisu]

blue spring

weeks ago i stumbled upon a post on weibo and just now i saw a tweet on twitter that made me wanted to read the original once again. im in a great pain! anyway my thoughts are too unorganized so read at your own risk 😔

i love how gege in original specifically chose to word it aoi haru (青い春) which means, of course "youth" but literally means "blue spring". it's more like a poetic way or could be a pun for seishun (青春) which holds the same meaning. wording it as youth is not wrong at all, it's effective, but to me personally it doesn't capture much the essence of the "youth" that they tried to show us.

aoi (青い) means blue, could also mean unripe and inexperienced. while haru (春) means springtime or spring (season).

there are many ways to interpret this sentimental line. it refers to as the spring of one's life time, one could say "in one's prime", any time in your life that could be one of the best times in your life. it could also be understood as "inexperienced years" "youthful naïveté" and "fresh start".

if you searched aoi haru on google, what you might find would be a 2001 film directed by toshiaki toyoda. it tells story about a friendship of two boys that gone wrong. to put it short kujo, bored of their daily violent routine and aoki, might be a bit too dependent on his bestfriend bc of his admiration which one day leads to a crack in their friendship. my favorite part would be when they grow some tulips, each representing themselves like some of them bloom too fast resulting them to wither early while kujo's flower blooms the last. drawing a parallel with the plot: after aoki finally sets up his final showdown, choosing death, kujo, whose attempt at saving him fails, finally decides to give life a chance to blossom.

what essence of youth im trying to say is, the times gojou had with getou, those three years, were forsooth the best time of his life. some said you could have your youth but it wouldn't necessarily be the spring of your life time. it pains me that the shinjuku breakup was also included in three years of his youth memories implying it was the end of his "blue spring". even though it led to a tragedy, it also became his fresh start.

some satosugu + spring brainrots im having while typing this post but i dont know where to fit in:

getou being born in setsubun, which is a day before the beginning of spring.

chapter 100 cover was the last spring they spent together, they were already third years. the fact that getou was already deteriorating but still able to laugh because gojou was there.

[coldtacosaladwasntfound]

Heyyy dude (gender neutral) how are you? I love your work!! I was wondering whether you could do a fluff poly pic with dream x reader x George where the reader gets hated on and the boys are protective of them. Original, I know 🙄✋/lh drink water ❤

hello ! here you go bud :)) kinda sucks but oh well

pronouns : they / them

H A T E • dream x georgenotfound x reader fluff

Twitter. Something about the godforsaken app could put a grimace on anyone's face. Twitter stans aren't all bad, but obviously controversial comments will end up being the most interacted with content on the site, just causing more and more people to see it. Was I surprised when I realized I was under attack; specifically by accounts dedicated to my partners and their friends? Not really, but it definitely still hurt. I expected it eventually but not this soon. I had barely appeared on stream w the guys, only coming in and out of Dream's room.

I was laying on the couch in Dream's room, scrolling through the replies to a post asking people what they thought of me. Dream was unknowingly sitting at his desk, editing with his headphones on. I truly didn't think the comments would be that bad, and some of them weren't, but some were.

@/user

idek anything ab them but they give me a bad vibe fr /gen

----@/user2

---- no like actually same, like the way they talk to dream is just,,, idk how to explain it

@/user3

literally not our place to assume things ab them ???? we know NOTHING ab them

----@/user4

---- ^^^ reminder

@/user5

they interact w [creator] 🚩🚩🚩🚩

I heard Dream talk, snapping me out of my thoughts. "Yeah, they're right here. [Y/n], George wants to say 'hi'!"

"Okay." I sat up and walked over to the computer, him unplugging the headphones. "Hi, George," I said, a slightly forced grin on my face.

"Hey, how are you?" I could tell that was more of a genuinely concerned kind of 'how are you' rather than a casual one. He could tell I wasn't alright.

"Uh..." I looked at Dream, he also seemed a bit concerned. There was no use in lying to them. "I was reading through a Twitter thread that I probably should've just ignored. It brought me down a bit."

Dream hugged me from behind in his seat. "We saw it. Do you wanna talk about it?" He asked.

I nodded. "It's not quite what they said that bothers me, but the fact that they don't even know me and there's nothing I can do to change their opinion."

"Their opinion doesn't matter. Like you said, they don't know you," George said into his mic. "We know you, and we love you." Dream nodded in agreement.

"I love you guys, too."

-

I woke up the next morning, cute memories of Dream and I's cuddle session last night. I was in Dream's bed and the blonde boy himself was once again sat his desk, talking quietly on call with someone. "Your chat needs to chill," Dream muttered through a clenched jaw. I got up and walked up behind him, looking over his shoulder while I wait for him to notice me. I glance at chat, trying to find what they need to chill about.

Oh.

He jumped, scrambling to mute himself and close the Twitch tab. "Good morning, angel," He said as he looked up at me.

I didn't know what to say. Of course, even Sapnap's chat was talking about me. I just let the emotions come through, standing there and feeling the insecurity hit.

I assumed Sapnap had noticed Dream's disappearance and tried to get his attention, as I watched Dream quickly unmute and begin talking. "Hey, I'm here, sorry, my mic fucked up." His eyes went back to the stream to see the chat, the discourse still raging. "Chat, please shut up about the people I hang out with in real life." I could tell he wanted it to be as vague as possible. "They're real people and can see the things you say." He paused and looked up at me. "I'm gonna hop off now." He left the call and took off his headphones, pulling me towards him. "You're worth so much to me, I don't like when people talk about you like that."

I sat in his lap and felt my phone buzz, pulling it out of my pocket and seeing George's name on my screen for a video call. I answered it and aimed the camera at Dream and I. "Hi, George... join the cuddle sesh," I offered jokingly.

"Gladly," he chuckled, his smile stunning me. "There's nowhere I'd rather be." Dream gave me a kiss on the cheek, nodding.

I received a Twitter notification for George's account. I opened it, scanning over the text.

@/GeorgeNotFound

Stop tweeting about creators personal friends challenge 2021 99% fail

I chuckled, piquing George's curiosity. "What are you laughing at?" I went back to the video call.

"Your tweet," I replied. Dream chuckled as he looked at it himself. "Thanks, a lot."

"For what? It's our job to stick up for you, we care about you," He insisted. George hummed an 'mhm' in approval.

"Still, thanks. Also, can we watch a movie together tonight?" Dream chuckled and nodded.

"Of course, you can pick the movie," George offered, exciting me further.

"Including Disney Channel Original Movies?" I asked as Dream groaned in a mixture of disgust and annoyance at the thought of watching a Disney Channel movie.

"Yes, including them," George responded before Dream could.

I laughed as the freckled boy before me let out his complaints, "They're all so predictable, the writing's shit."

"Shut up, Dream," George interjected in defense. "It's just one movie."

After all agreeing, the three of us sat on call watching a movie of my choice.

[babymetaldoll]

Let me show you how I love you (Matthew Gray Gubler/ Reader)

NOT MY GIF! whoever made this, I love you so much!! 

Requested: Yes :) “The reader finds out about Madison Beer's post that was a while ago, and she gets jealous. But Matthew shows her that she has nothing to worry about.”

Category: Smut and fluff with a dash of angst.

Summary: When (Y/N) feels insecure, Matthew Gray Gubler shows her how much he loves and wants her.

Warnings: low self-esteem issues, cursing (obviously), oral sex, penetrative sex, daddy kink. All the good stuff.

Word count: 2,9K

Masterlist

A/N: Yes, this is my first official published smut. I hope it doesn't suck. Sorry if it does. Also, I'm kind of late on A LOT of requests, sorry, but I promise I'm working on all of them!! I just need a little time to make sure they are awesome <3 thank you all for reading!! You are the best!

(Y/N) looked at herself in the mirror and sighed. She had spent most of the afternoon crying, curled on the bed, hugging the pillow.

She had never felt so insecure and self-aware of each one of her flaws before.

Her arms were too chubby, she had cellulitis on her legs, and her hair didn't look pretty at all, no matter how much care she took of it. She tried her best, but she felt she failed every day.

And her boyfriend was gorgeous. As she stared at her reflex in the mirror, she wondered why someone like Matthew Gray Gubler would date her? Honestly, hands down, she wasn't anything special, not like him. He had worked as a model for Christ's Sakes! Girls on the street drooled over him. He had fans all over the world who would die to be with him. Even celebrities had a crush on him.

And unfortunately, that was what hurt her that day.

Usually, (Y/N) wouldn't overthink any of this. She would take a deep breath and look into Matthew's eyes and know how much he loved her. But not that day.

Maybe it was because he had been out of town for over three weeks now. The thought of him meeting someone else when he was away had started hunting (Y/N)'s mind and spreading the fear of rejection all over her body, like a disease.

A friend had sent (Y/N) a screenshot of a tweet earlier that day. Madison Beer had tweeted she loved Matthew Gray Gubler for the second time that week. The second time. And it got under her skin 'cos she wasn't as hot as Madison Beer was. Not a chance. That girl looked perfect on the screen, and she... well, she looked human. And Matthew didn't deserve human, 'cos he was heavenly made.

Seriously, why was he dating her? That's what she kept asking herself as she stood in front of that mirror, making her best not to cry anymore. It would come the day he noticed she was a mess, and he would leave her. Of that, (Y/N) was sure.

- "Bunny? I'm home!"

- "Fuck!"- (Y/N) ran to the bathroom to wash her face. She didn't know Matthew was coming home that day, and though she was excited to see him, she didn't want him to see her like that.

What a shitty way to welcome your boyfriend after three weeks apart: crying and wearing an oversized sweatshirt. Any other pretty girl would wait for him in sexy lingerie, makeup, and looking hot as fuck.

(Y/N) felt like crying again.

- "Bunny? are you here"- Matthew walked into the room and spotted his girlfriend in the bathroom- "There you are!!"- he ran to her and hugged her tight. She locked her arms around him tight and sighed. He smelled so good, always. He closed his eyes, thinking exactly the same: she smelled like home. Her neck was the place he never wanted to leave.

- "I missed you so much"- he whispered against her skin and moved his face, reaching her lips and kissing her with such passion and love, she felt a knot in her throat. It made her want to cry to think she might lose him over anyone else.

- "Are you ok?"- he whispered, frowning. (Y/N)'s eyes were filled with tears- "Why are you crying?"

- "I just missed you so much,"- she muttered and kissed him again. Matthew held her tight and tangled his fingers in her hair. He bit her lips and tasted her. His hands quickly roamed from (Y/N)'s hair down her back until her bottom, lifting her and sitting her on the sink.

- "I missed you too, Bunny, so fucking much. I just couldn't stop thinking about you all day, every day"- Matthew tried to pull up her sweatshirt, but suddenly, she stopped him, tugging it down.

- "What is it?"

- "Nothing... I just..."

- "Are you cold?

- "No... I..."- (Y/N) really didn't want to tell him she was embarrassed about her body, considering he had seen her naked a hundred times already.

- "What is it?"- Gubler started kissing her neck sweetly, and his hands made their way underneath her sweatshirt moving slowly up her back. She shivered at the sensation of his touch and moaned, biting her lips. That was music for his ears.

- "Do you know what I thought about the whole way home?"- he rubbed his lips against her neck as he spoke, sending electric charges all over her body. - "I couldn't stop imagining your face when you cum underneath me, screaming my name."

His voice was low, sexy, like velvet, caressing her ear.

-"I wanna leave bruises on this pretty neck"- he started licking and nibbling on it. (Y/N) moaned again.

- "And all the way to your tits"- but when he tried to take out her sweatshirt again, she stopped him.

- "Ok, what is it?"- Matthew took a step back and (Y/N) shook at the sudden cold she felt, losing contact with his body.

- "Nothing,"- she whispered and looked at her hands on her lap

- "Bunny"- Matthew touched her chin softly and tilted up her face until she looked at his eyes- "What is it?"

- "I just"

(Y/N) felt so dumb trying to explain what was wrong. If he wouldn't dump her for being ugly, he would definitely do it for being stupid. In the four years of dating, she had never felt this way before. Why now? And why did it hit her so hard?

- "I just..."

(Y/N) tried to explain what was going on again, but the way Matthew was looking at her made her feel more nervous. She moved from him and walked to their shared room. Maybe if she didn't look at him in the eyes, she could explain what was going on.

- "Bunny, did anything bad happen when I was away?"

Now Matthew was worried. He tried to remember if his girlfriend had mentioned anything that could have upset her. But no, nothing came to his mind.

- "I just don't know why you like me."

She whispered and looked outside the window to make sure Matthew's eyes couldn't look at her.

- What?- Gubler was lost in that conversation.

- "You deserve to be with a beautiful woman. You are fucking gorgeous, and I am so fucking... ordinary"- tears filled her eyes as she tried to stay calm.

- "Bunny... what are you talking about? you are beautiful!"- he stood behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist, holding her close. (Y/N) closed her eyes for a moment, melting at his touch.

- "Matthew... I am not"- she murmured- "I have cellulitis and stretch marks. I'm far from being size 0, I have no idea how to make my makeup or hair, and there is no way anyone out there can believe you are dating me."

Gubler turned his girlfriend around and forced her to look at him. She was crying.

- "Why are you so hard on yourself? (Y/N), you are gorgeous?- she grunted and rolled her eyes, but Matthew continued.

- "When I first saw you, I couldn't stop staring at you because you are so beautiful. It took me three drinks to finally get the courage to talk to you."

- "Matthew, you dated models, for christ's sakes! Pretty girls are throwing themselves to you all the time! Look at me! I'm a regular girl on a sweatshirt, who..."

But Matthew didn't let her finish talking. He pulled her closer and kissed her, his hands holding her face firmly as he did.

- "I love you, (Y/N)"- he whispered as he continued kissing her- "You, I want you."

- "But..."- she tried to move, but he didn't let her. He looked at her for a moment and kissed away the tears from her cheeks.

- "I love you, all of you, every inch of you"- he continued kissing her cheeks and her forehead as his hands played with her hair. (Y/N) closed her eyes and sighed.

- "There's no one out there that could ever tempt me. Do you wanna know why?"

- "Why?"- (Y/N) whispered and pouted. Matthew couldn't control himself and bit her lower lip sweetly.

- "Because I am yours, (Y/N). All yours"

How could anyone resist those words?

Matthew Gray Gubler stared at (Y/N) and kissed the tip of her nose.

- "And I want you. All the time. You are perfect, my little princess. To me, you are the most beautiful woman on earth, and I thank god every day for giving me the chance to love you."

Matthew made a pause and held the edge of her sweatshirt. She didn't move or tried to stop him. So, he pulled it up and tossed it aside. His girlfriend was now standing in front of him only in her panties.

He held his breath and contemplated her for a few seconds. (Y/N) blushed and kept looking at him, feeling a weird mix of excitement and embarrassment at the same time.

- "Let me show you how much I love you, Bunny"- Matthew leaned in. He kissed her neck sweetly, taking a few steps closer to the bed, until she fell onto it and felt the warmth of his body on top of her, his lips trailing kisses all the way to her breast.

- "Your skin is so soft, and touching you feels so good is addictive"- he hummed for a moment, still kissing her

- "I love your tits, they are perky and soft, and I'm obsessed with how they feel when I suck them"- and just like that, Matthew did so, making his girlfriend moan loudly in a second

- "And I'm in love with this ass"- he rolled her on the bed and bit her bottom, and squeezed it- "I love to spank it and leave bruises on it when you've been a bad girl."

(Y/N) moaned one more time and tried not to close her eyes. She wanted to look at him as he worshiped every inch of her skin, now kissing her waistline and her belly.

- "And your pussy. I am in love with your tight little pussy, Bunny"- Matthew placed himself between her legs and kissed her inner thighs sweetly, pulling her panties down.

- "I love how it's so wet for me right now."- he whispered and slowly placed a finger inside of her, making her shiver and pant. He smiled, staring at her for a moment. He loved her, and he would do anything and everything to make her believe him.

Slowly, he ran his tongue around her clit, teasing her, as he curled his finger inside of her.

- "Fuck"- (Y/N) cursed and sighed, still trying to keep her eyes open. That one word was enough to fuel Matthew. He licked her and tasted her, humming against her folds.

- "You taste so good,"- he whispered and removed his finger to replace it with his tongue. He wanted to taste all of her. The sensation of his tongue made her buck up her hips unconsciously, and he forced them down with both hands.

- "Do you like that?

- "Yes, daddy."

(Y/N) managed to say, though her brain wasn't functioning correctly with all the pleasure she was feeling at the moment. It was like a wave that washed away every single coherent thought she could have.

Matthew smiled and continued licking her, tasting every inch of her. He soaked the tender flesh on her thighs, teasing her and leaving small bruises, to then lick her clit again. She was a mess on that bed. Panting and moaning his name over and over again.

- "I wanna eat you out every day until I die,"- Gubler whispered against her pussy.

- "I wanna make you cum on my mouth until you can't take it anymore, princess."

With those words and his tongue, (Y/N) felt her climax approach quickly. It never took Matthew much to make her cum like that. He knew her too well. Two fingers inside her pussy and his tongue licking her clit, humming and groaning against her.

- "Daddy, I'm gonna...."- she somehow said, gasping and moaning

- "I want you to say my name when you cum"- he commanded, and his tongue licked her whole center, tasting her, as his fingers continued pumping in and out of her.

(Y/N) panted and guided one of her hands to his hair, tangling his fingers on it. Her other hand kept playing with her nipples, pinching them until she felt the fire inside of her burning and exploiting all of a sudden.

- "M... Ma... Matthew!!"- she managed to cry out as Gubler held her hips down, 'cos once she started coming, her whole body was shaking.

Gubler continued licking her sweet and carefully until she wouldn't move anymore. Then, he traced a path of kisses from her center to her lips slowly, passing by her tummy, breast, collar bone, and neck.

- "I love you so fucking much, princess"- (Y/N) heard him and raised her legs to wrap them around him as he placed himself upon her.

- "You are the most beautiful, sexy, and perfect woman I have ever known."

Gubler rubbed his cock against her overstimulated clit, still sensitive after coming. (Y/N) looked at him and bit her lips. His sweaty forehead rested on hers for a moment, and he whispered with the softest voice.

- "Do you believe me now? do you believe you are the only one for me?"

- "Yes"- she answered and moaned as he pushed himself into her entrance slowly. Painfully slowly.

- "I don't want anyone else, pretty girl"- he praised and took some flicks of hair from her face as he stared at her- "You are mine, you know that"- Matthew rocked slowly upon her. (Y/N) scratched his back, feeling how he opened her with every thrust.

- "I'm yours,"- she repeated and kissed him, tasting herself in his lips. It was a sloppy kiss filled with passion and hunger.

Gubler took a deep breath and concentrated on what he was doing because her pussy felt too good around his cock, and he needed to hold himself not to come right away.

He loved being inside of her. No other woman had ever felt that way. And if only (Y/N) knew everything she did to him, she would never doubt herself again.

- "Well, I'm yours too"- he confessed and smiled, staring at her with such love, (Y/N) felt like crying again- "You own every inch of me. You are the owner of my thoughts, my heart, my cock. Everything I am is yours"- Matthew murmured and closed his eyes for a second, losing himself in the pleasure as he buried himself deeper into her.

Their bodies melted together, pressed against each other. Matthew's head was hidden on the crock of her neck, biting and kissing her. Marking her as his.

- "Is daddy good for you?"- he asked her, increasing his pace, rocking faster and deeper into her. He felt her walls clenching against his cock, as she nodded frenetically

- "Yes, so good."

- "I'm glad. You are a good girl for daddy too"- Matthew bit his lips and stared at her, coming undone underneath him. The sound their bodies made as they melted together was all the two of them could listen to. Matthew's breathing grew heavy, feeling his cock buried deep into (Y/N)'s core. His thrusts were becoming erratic as he continued to fasten his movements.

(Y/N)'s nails were nearly drawing blood. She was holding onto him as if her life depended on it.

- "I love you."- Matthew managed to whisper and kissed her. She moaned against his lips and tried to reply, but she couldn't. Her second orgasm took over her like an earthquake, rocking every part of her body.

Matthew couldn't hold himself anymore. He groaned, biting (Y/N)'s neck and crying out her name, spilling inside of her. He didn't stop kissing her neck and her lips until neither of them could move anymore.

- "I love you"- he repeated and looked at her, breathless- "Please, never doubt it again."

- "I won't"- she whispered and leaned in, kissing him again- "You are the only one for me."

- "You are the girl of my dreams, (Y/N)"- he hugged her tight, both of them rolling in bed until they were side by side.

- "What do you say we take a shower, ask for something to eat, and watch a movie together?"- he asked her, running his fingers through her hair. She nodded and smiled. -" Good, I wanna see you happy, Bunny. Every day."

- "You make me happy, honey. Everyday."

[wdwmarveldisney]

🥺👉👈 Could I maybe request a doctor who x reader with a younger, more innocent teenage reader? And the doctor gets protective over them, especially when they could be in danger. Any doctor could fit. (sorry if this is not enough information I'm new to making requests)

Let them go

Eleventh Doctor x platonic!teen!reader

Summary: When the Doctor takes you to your favourite musical, things once again don’t end well.

Masterlist

A/N: Ok so I loved this request and thank you so much. You are so sweet. Don’t worry about how information there is, I just hope that you like it. I may have mixed a little Newsies in here because, well I love it and I honestly think about how I would a hundred percent ask to go there if I was travelling with the Doctor.

Not my GIF

Shaking violently when travelling seemed to be the only flaw of the TARDIS and even then, it was only because the Doctor was a terrible pilot. He had tried to convince you otherwise but you'd met River on more than one occasion and she had actual evidence for her argument so excuse you if you sided with her. But that didn't mean that you hated it; every time it happened, you'd grin real big because it was just yet another reminder of the chaos that came with the Doctor. You had a usual place by the controls, one where you were often moved from during flight to avoid you being in the way. Most of the time you ended up in one of the seats, watching his every move in hopes of learning what any of it meant. River had promised to teach you when you were older, said you could leave the Doctor in the 1920s where he apparently thrived and she'd teach you how to the drive the TARDIS.

Right now however, you were here in 2017 New York, at your request. You had asked to see the recording of Newsies after a small (ok so maybe the exact opposite of small) obsession with the musical over the years. You were surprised when all the Doctor had to do was make a call and suddenly you were right at the front with the opportunity to go backstage afterwards too. The inner fangirl was hard to control as the two of you headed to the doors and you managed to stumble slightly but he had caught you before you could fall into the wooden doors. Pouting as he laughed, you tugged his bow tie hard making him stop with a frown and a hand going to readjust it. He scanned your attire with an amused smile which resulted in a flick to the head from you. "Ow, I didn't say anything!"

You walked out the TARDIS, breathing in the smell of hotdogs and petrol before facing him with a small frown, "You were thinking it. I can wear a Newsies shirt if I want to wear a Newsies shirt," he put his hands up in surrender as he walked out too and then quickly turned to lock the doors. You tugged at the shirt in question as you glanced round the empty alley, waiting for him. It was a few seconds before you felt an arm fall into your shoulders and quickly you began to walk to the streets with big smiles on your faces. In the small time you had come to know the Doctor, he had become like family. You had been quite sheltered growing up, never seen much trouble but that's kinda expected from a small town family. When you started travelling with the TimeLord, you saw a lot of bad stuff, things you had never even thought possible and so naturally, he was protective. He was like an older brother, maybe a dad ish vibe.

Your steps were in time with his as you approached the theatre, huffing at how long the queue to get in was. Finally in line, you tapped your foot patiently and suddenly, the question had slipped from your lips without much thought, "How did you get good tickets?" He paused, reaching up to fiddle with his bow tie nervously before straightening out his tweed jacket. He avoided eye contact and instead stared at the bright lights surrounding you guys, "Well, um, I helped write it. Historical facts and stuff," you watched him shrug with terribly faked nonchalance. Jaw dropping, your eyes went comically wide as you stuttered out, "You- They- What?" Unbelievable. Of course he knew about your obsession with the musical and failed to mention his involvement with writing it.

It was a couple hours later and you were waiting by the Doctor's side as the theatre cleared out. He had spent the whole musical jittery and chatty, clearly not good with just sitting there and watching. Several times someone had complained and you had had to talk with him about it. He was a literal child at times. But despite the fact he had muttered about his hate for Twitter after the girl next to you guys tweeted a picture of herself and her friend there, you enjoyed yourself. The musical was just as great as the first time you watched the recording, if not better. And now, you couldn't stop bouncing in excitement. You were actually going backstage, and you were going to meet the cast of a musical you have obsessed over for years.

But of course, with the Doctor, things never happened that easily.

The TimeLord had pulled out his sonic screwdriver to fiddle with while you waited and frowned at the noise it made. You caught his muttering and huffed, already knowing that look on his face. Concern, anger and a touch of excitement. "Don't say it," his eyes slowly left the device in his hands as he raised an eyebrow at your words. Someone was just leaving the backstage area but neither of you noticed as you sighed, "Why does something always have to happen? One good, non-alien day is all I ask. Is that even possible with you?" He grinned goofily at you with a breathy chuckle before raising the screwdriver in the air and scanning your surroundings. You jumped at the tap on your shoulder, facing the crew member with fists raised like that would do something. "Oh,"

"I was sent to get you. What's he doing?" You glanced to the Doctor, who now stood on one of the seats and you shrugged, arms crossing over his chest. Looking between both men, eventually you answered, "I find it best not to ask until he gets that look on his face," the guy frowned as he watched the Doctor jump from the seat and run up an aisle and look through one of the doors. As the two of you watched him lock the door with the screwdriver, the crew guy asked, "What look?" Going to respond, you stopped yourself once seeing the dark look of his face. The one that ensured mortal danger and most likely ended with the two of you saving the world. Again.

"That look," the guy watched you point to the alien as he made his way over to you by jumping over one of the seats. His arm landed on your shoulders as he huffed slightly from all the running round, "Right okay then, possible shapeshifter, very dangerous and kills for the hell of it. Also, amazing dancers and have a tendency to be really funny. Ready?" As he spoke, he looked the guy up and down in a calculating way as if he was possible suspect. You ignored the shock and fear on the guy's face in front of you and instead tilted your head in debate, "I mean, yeah sure," with a laugh, he clapped his hands together and approached the crew member. He too ignored the expression or he just didn't notice with how quickly his mind was now working. He smiled, hands clasped in front of him as he did another look over the guy before speaking, "Ok, we're ready to go. Should probably check out backstage first," he looked to you and you nodded in agreement. "Well," he paused as he placed his hands on the guy's shoulder, looking at him with a raised eyebrow. Panicky look still clearly painted on his features, his voice shook as he managed, "Carl,"

"Well Carl, lead the way," gripping the clipboard in his hands tighter, Carl turned around and began to walk up the stairs and backstage with the two of you following. You stared at your feet as you walked, pout on your lips as you thought, "So, when you say very dangerous...?" The Doctor paused before backtrack king to you and placing his hands on your shoulders whilst ducking his head down to meet your eyes. He had such certainty and determination that you knew he wasn't lying when he said, "Nothing bad will happen to you, I promise," a chuckle left your lips as you punched his shoulder, smile lighting up your face as he remained unbelievably serious, "Well duh. I've got my own hero. And you know I'd haunt the hell out of you," he shook his head, smile fighting it's way to his face as the two of you began to walk behind the curtain.

-

So apparently the Doctor isn't great with promises or at least, that's what you gather when the two of you were walking down a deserted corridor and something had grabbed you from behind. The last hour had been the two of you searching in the dark, trusting no one since this alien shapeshifted. Two crew members were found dead and another missing so the Doctor insisted on going to find her and well, naturally you followed without question. And now you had a claw to your throat as you whimpered at how hard the alien was pulling your hair. This made the Doctor turn, eyes darkening when he saw you struggling and crying quietly to yourself. "Let them go," it was practically a whisper but it echoed in the hall, making the creature laugh. "Why would I do that?" The voice was deep and distorted and almost robotic, "They'll be so much fun," the last word was spat, venom in the voice making whimper again. You shook violently and the Doctor met your terrified eyes with his remorseless ones. "Why are you here? Order the Shadow Proclamation states Earth is a Level five planet. Do you know what they'd do to you?" He took a few taunting steps forward, head almost bowed in anger.

A small scream left your lips as the claw made a small cut in your throat and the Doctor seemed to tense. Rolling out his shoulders, the TimeLord uncharacteristically smirked as his fingers toyed with the screwdriver in his hands and he laughed almost hollowly, "I know about your people. I have fought your people time again and again and again. And do you want to know what I remember?" There was a pause in his words, only audible thing being your small cries, "You really don't like high frequencies," he raised an eyebrow as he pressed a button and the alien began to freak. His hands slammed over his ears and he stumbled back, essentially freeing you. You managed to make your way to a worried and panicking Doctor before the two of you rushed down the hall and inside a changing room. You fell back against the door as the whir of the screwdriver and the click of the lock and the huffs of your breaths filled the room.

Suddenly the small device was stuck in your face, scanning you up and down before you smacked it away. He gave you a pointed look before carrying on, no doubt scanning for any other type of harm. He was in protective mode which wasn't uncommon but could get annoying when he wouldn't stop checking up on you. With a frustrated expression, you snatched the screwdriver from his hands and shook your head when your eyes met, “I’m fine,” you made sure to emphasise the last word and the Doctor mimicked you under his breath like a three year old. Scoffing, you pointed the screwdriver at him in warning but he just simply took it back with a small huff.

And then there was a bang at the door and the two of you were reminded of the danger you were facing this time round.