#i also might post my inktober since we were asked to do that in my class

[mysticsparklewings]

Terror in Six Words

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He didn't know

she'd been bitten.

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Hey, this isn’t an Obscutober piece! ��

No, but you’re getting 2 art things from me today because there were some community events on DeviantArt I wanted to partake in, & as it happens a “scary” 6-word story in poetry magnets felt like a good way to do that. 😉

Same as the Obscutober pieces, if you’re curious to hear more about my process for how this all came together—and I promise it was much more involved than you’d think!—Click the "Keep Reading" and we'll talk a bit more about my general thoughts/process. ✨

⭐️ Like My Art and Want to see more of it? Here's All My Links! ⭐️

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So, again: Hmm. This doesn't look like an Obscutober piece, and yet...it looks kind of familiar, doesn't it? 😉 We all probably should've known that I'd break out the mini-magnets at least once this month, sooner or later. 🤭

This was actually supposed to be kind of a 2-in-1 piece, but this has been such a busy month and busy week in particular that I got my days mixed up and thought I had more time than I actually did...So it's no longer a 2-in-1, but it wasn't totally a waste, either.

DeviantArt, in typical fashion, is holding a Badge Event this month, and loyal Sparklers will know if it's a badge I like I have a hard time turning those down—We went through something similar last year! And on top of that, @CRLiterature was also holding a Tiny Tales of Terror Challenge...which ran through the 24th, and you'll notice today's date is the 26th. 😅

And to be clear: I'm mentioning the Tiny Tales Challenge not because I expect any kind of exception or what-have-you to be made for me, but just to be transparent about my motivations. It's my fault for missing the deadline and I accept that. The only reason I'm going ahead and posting it now, so soon after the missed deadline, instead of holding off until Halloween is because I am hoping to maybe squeeze in something else just for Halloween, and I've got a bunch of other things to try and scramble to get done on my to-do list before then; If I don't post it today, it may very well not get posted at all. 🫠

[Plot twist: I was thisclose to posting this yesterday, even, but yesterday was a particularly chaotic day so it just wasn't possible—yet more evidence that if I'm not careful and quick about it this artwork may be doomed to live behind the scenes forever.]

It would also be kind of disingenuous to discuss what I made without mentioning that challenge as that's where I got the entire idea to make this specifically a six-word-story from.

DeviantArt's Badge Event, for those who don't know, is encouraging people to make something inspired by some short stories they commissioned. So there was my starting point, and I had been considering breaking out the poetry magnets for a Halloween-ish one-off piece anyway, since I have really been missing them this month while I handle Inktober/Obscutober in a magnet-less way for the first time in years.

While I had those two thoughts at the back of my mind, the Tiny Tales Challenge came up, which asked people to write a scary story in six words or less. And since I'm personally most familiar with six-word-stories from magnetic poetry, it all just kinda came together as a perfect storm in my mind: A six-word story, told in magnets, inspired by one of the stories for the badge event. 💡

Now, that said, if you've read the four short stories for the badge event, you might be scratching your head and trying to figure out what my six words here have to do with any of them. I won't deny for a moment that any connection to the story I picked really isn't obvious, but all I can tell you Sparklers is that my brain is a strange place and you never know what off-the-wall connections are going to be made in there. 🤪

Of the four stories, the one that stuck with me the most was Survivor's Guilt. It has a kind of somber, Twilight-Zone-esque quality to it, and that's more what I personally favor in "horror" story over the typical heart-racing-scream-your-head off variety. [As I've probably talked about a bit before but I don't remember where.]

Somehow, I left that story with one of my favorite My Chemical Romance songs in my head—Early Sunsets Over Monroeville, which itself was inspired by Dawn of the Dead. And I was also reminded just a little of Carmilla, a vampire tale that actually predates Bram Stoker's Dracula.

As I said, my brain is a strange place that makes strange connections. 🥴 My best guess is that my subconscious really hitched onto the ending revelation of Survivor's Guilt, which I won't spoil for you here if you haven't read it. (You should though, it's good!)

Suffice to say: Something about how we don't know what we don't know and we want to understand, but sometimes gaining that understanding is it's own special kind of horror.

But just having those inspirations and making those strange connections alone wasn't enough, of course. I still had to string some actual words together, not just feelings. 😆 So I broke out my notebook for mini-magnet brainstorming and started scribbling.

Well, okay, first I had to search up and read some existing six-word-stories from across the internet because it's been so long since I last tried to write one that I was having trouble getting in what felt like the right headspace to work with so few words. Then I got scribbling.

In said scribbling, I was reminded very much of a few years ago—ironically, the first time I followed an Obscutober list—when I made another one-off mini-magnet piece that was also meant to be a scary story in few words. Granted, that was 50 words or less, so still a very different experience.

That is to say though: I was reminded that "scary" writing is not my strong suit. 😅 I just can't even seem to quite grasp the "punch" to properly shift the words from ominous into actually spooky territory. And that was not made any easier by having to work in so few words.

My main take away from my efforts in the notebook is that it's not actually that hard to come up with six word (or less!) sentences that sound spooky...if you think of them within a scary context. For example, "They ignored the warnings," can be scary if you're thinking of it as people ignoring warnings that will inevitably lead to something dangerous/harmful happening. But it can just as easily be not very scary at all if this "they" is just ignoring warnings of "Oh don't touch that, the paint's still wet and you'll get paint on your hands."

Context is also very important in the words being anything close to a story, and not just...well, just words, if that makes any sense. "There was a body," is a sentence, yes, and it could definitely lean scary if you picture "body" as a non-living person. But it's still a relatively "flat" statement of fact.

I think that's a large part of why I kept thinking of Early Sunsets, and kind of songs in general as I was trying to figure out where to go with my ideas and feelings. Good song lyrics can squeeze a whole lot of story and metaphor into just a few words, and I feel that's especially true with My Chemical Romance. [One of many reasons why they're my favorite.

"They're building a coffin your size," is what I would consider a pretty much perfect scary six-word-story, straight from their song Mama, to give you a better idea of where I'm coming from. And if this could have just been a recycled song quote, I totally would've used that—but this was not the time nor place. 😆

To be fair, despite everything I just described about my thought process, in the end I'm not sure I totally succeeded in getting everything I wanted out of my six words, but of the options I wrote down (that were actually my words to use), this was the one I kept coming back to.

It puts vampires in my head first and foremost—Most certainly because that's my favorite "traditional" monster archetype, and if you know me at all that comes as no surprise at all, I'm sure. But there are plenty of other instances where the answer to the unwritten question of "Bitten by what?" Would be rightly terrifying: Zombie (as more directly related to Early Sunsets), Werewolf, even non-Halloween-ish things like a rabid animal or disease-carrying mosquito.

...Okay the rabid animal could still be Halloween-ish if it was a rabid bat or something, but you get the idea.

Yet there are still ways to put a more metaphorical spin on it; That this "she" could've been "bitten by a bug" as in something that changed her way of thinking or motivations in life and made her into a scarier person than she was before, or something like that.

So perfect, no, but it was the closest to striking the right balance of all the different things I wanted that I was able to come up with.

Which leaves us with the visual component. The magnets are what they always are, but what is this background?

Well, if you remember when I mentioned I've done this short-story-in-few-words kind of thing before, there's actually a touch more irony there. Last time, I used a photo is from a "Tezza College Kit" that I actually won from a past DeviantArt contest as my base and made some additions and modifications to better fit the mood I was going for. Since I knew full-well I wouldn't have time to come up with something from scratch for this, that was the first other option that came to mind.

So I sifted through those photos for something that felt like either a good fit or at least a good place to start.

And I must disclose that at that point, I was actually still strongly considering one other assortment of six words—I was thinking of "cheating the system" and submitting two separate six-word-stories that kind of went together. I ultimately decided not to because the more I thought of the two together, the weaker the other one felt compared to this one.

But I mention that because my initial photo pulls from the kit were pretty different because I was hoping to get two photos that seemed to go together and still felt right thematically. As much as I love the base photo I picked here—so much so I strongly considered it at the time for that 50 word story I keep referring to—It wouldn't have worked for the two-story idea really at all because I just didn't have another photo that would pair well with it for what I wanted.

That said, the photo was a little plain—pure black and white—on it's own, so I ended up fiddling with the colors a bit and bringing up the reds for some more drama.

I will note though that dramatic red wasn't actually my first choice. I had planned to just use the fact that photographing black and white things without a filter is challenging to my advantage, but the photo that was the best of the ones I took in other ways didn't have much color alteration going on. Originally, I was just going to add a little warmth/hints of sepia like happened naturally in one of the other photos I took, but since I had Photoshop open anyway I decided to play just a little, and the red came about as a result of that playtime.

I very nearly actually went with an all-over red tone (except for the white space in the middle), but thought the look was ultimately too dark. I did the spot red after thinking things over and deciding I really didn't want to artificially brighten the image up and mess with the black contrast if I could help it.

Whew. 😮‍💨 ...Leave it to me to make six little words so complicated and particular, right? 😆

I think I ended up trying to make up for "lost time" in not doing more with magnetic poetry this year, even though they're only a very small part of the process. My subconscious thoroughly missed the memo that that wasn't necessary. 😅

Still, frustration at myself for getting the timeline jumbled up aside, I had fun. 🙂 The length of this description might speak more loudly to that than anything else. 🤣

Speaking of, I hate to end this kind of abruptly, but I think I have finally covered everything I wanted to about the art at hand and I still have to cross-post this and do the Obscutober piece for today, too. So if you Sparklers don't mind, I'll leave you to ponder these words, encourage you again to go check out Survivor's Guilt—and the other 3 Terror Tales, too!—and be on my way.

Don't you Sparklers get unknowingly bitten by anything in the meantime, alright? 😉

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Poem © me, MysticSparkleWings

Inspired by FridgePoetProject

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⭐️ Like My Art and Want to see more of it? Here's All My Links! ⭐️

[evilspiritweek]

Hi! First of all, wanted to say that you are wonderful for still doing some little fun stuff for RC9GN fandom! I can't say how much I appreciate seeing the activity in the tag from you! Thank you.

Now, the reason I'm sending an ask, is I have a few suggestions/ideas that I wondered you might be interested to hear? If not, feel free to ignore this! ;D its totally cool.

You mentioned in the DTIYS post that you might be getting busy since the break is ending, and it got me thinking, maybe DTIYS could be extended for other artists? Like, if you are busy that week, or do not have an idea for DTIYS (or just dont feel like it, we all have those days lol), you can do a sort of 'feature artist for the week' to do a DTIYS drawing? I understand there might be a contacting/scheduling problem with that idea, but you can always just make a post/notice and see if anyone wanted to do this/next week DTIYS.

If you are worried about the complexity of the featured art, you can also make a list of requirement for DTIYS (like, only a single character, no/little background, props, themed and etc), so it would be relatively similar for everyone?

It also will give you an opportunity to participate in DTIYS too rather than just make it, if you wanted to! I kinda feel bad that you seem to do all the work, even if I know that you are doing it from love to this fandom haha.

Another idea I wanted to offer/discuss is the polls! I actually thought poll/episode bracket idea was a fun one, but i know its not the most favorite one. However, maybe it could be sorta implemented in DTIYS? Maybe a poll for a character/theme/episode-related idea for DTIYS people would want to see next week? It doesn't have to be constant polls every week, maybe just occasional if you do not feel particularly inspired that week, it could give you an idea?

I know that you started these new smaller events, because they were less stressful and urgent than prompt week/month, but still fun enough to engage with! If these ideas seems like too much worry/work, I totally get it.

Anyway, I wish you a good day! Thanks for reading.

(also ur art is ridiculously adorable ok bye)

Sorry for the delayed response!! You wrote a lot of good points and I wanted to make sure I addressed them all <3

The post was getting a bit long, so it's under cut. TL;DR I think I'm going to treat this year as a test run and then create a more formal one for next year! That will involve a Google Forum probably(?), but do note that one of the questions will be on a specific date. One problem I've found with events is the time they take place. Not planning on moving Ninjavember's month, but that for example is sandwiched between October/Inktober and December/Holidays/Finals, so it can get busy. Considering this is a new event, I want to give people in the fandom currently the freedom to kinda pick and choose when this might be done.

I think extending the DTIYS event idea to other artists is a great idea! I know that I started this rather suddenly without warning, so people weren't given a sooner notice, but if I do this again, I can perhaps create a forum for people to submit things to or have people submit things here. Nothing super formal (because organizing that might get messy), but that way it can feel a bit more like a community event :D

For this event, I'm kinda sort of just drawing by the week, so if anyone wants to submit stuff now, that's totally fine too! Worst case is we have more than 5 by the end of April, and that's definitely not a bad thing lol

As for complexity of DTIYS prompts, I wanted to keep it varied for fun, but I also think focusing on simple doodles is fine. At least then, it gives people more of chance to focus on their style first rather than figuring out how to draw a car or something (bane of my existence)

I also like your idea for polls, and perhaps if we do a more formal one for this next year, we can implement that.

[spilledstrawberriestheblog]

Diary Entry No.30

Hi ! long time no see. Ive been sick and my life went really chaotic i was unable to be online much.

But i miss writing here so im gonna try get back into it ! first things first i might change my theme to something more cutesy? im not sure becuase of copyright n such but maybe if i use official artwork from franchises it will be ok? we will see. Its inktober ! i managed to do 3 days but becuz of what ive said before in this post i havent been able to continue.

Im not sure where to start but my mum came to visit on the 13th? of october. It made me really happy but also really saf when she left. I managed to talk to her about some stuff and it made me mentally realise that i might not have that great friendships.

Monday, tuesday and wednesday after that i stayed home partly sick, but mostly cuz i was scared to see my class/friends. My brain feels so foggy so i cant say more about how i was feeling but yeah.

On thursday it all became so much worse.

Me n my sis went to breakfast and it was the first time in ages we went, on our way in we bumped into [❤️] and [🍃]. Ive been kinda nervous around [❤️] but i tried to be bright and happy but i think i accidently was too happy to see [🍃] and it made [❤️] feel insecure. Im not sure..

I was already feeling really down and insecure and then i got a text message from [❤️] asking if i had been avoiding them. Which shocked me since they hadnt replied to my message before that. OH YEA THE MESSAGE I FORGOT YEAH SO BASICALLY ON SUNDAY NIGHT

after i went home from being with my mum, on close friends story [❤️] posted that they had a really bad weekend and had been crying etc. I didnt want them to feel alone but i also feel like i cant be there for them right now. So for the first time ever i replied telling them exactly that, and that ill support them in any way i can but im unable to be there for them and listen to their problems right now and that im messaging them this so they understand that my silence isnt becuase i dont care but becuse i need to take care of myself right now. It was the first time i ever set a boundary like that and they never replied.

So i felt like shit and when i got that message on thursday i was so confused becuz it said they had seen my message but never replied so i thought they hated me and felt uncomftorble by me becuz i couldnt support them right now. I told them how i felt and they were understanding and said they didnt realise their silence would make me feel that way.

I cant remember exactly but i think they asked if they had done anything to hurt me, and i ended up telling them how ive been feeling left out and its not just them but i feel like its really hard to connect to people so ive been emotionally very drained latley. And it feels like i cant talk to anyone about anything or about my interests and a lot of the time i just feel like a pet dog thats here waiting for a walk, to play fetch etc.

[❤️] didnt respond very well at all. They started talking about themselves and how theyve been going through a lot and it felt like they were disregarding how i was feeling completly. It made me feel like shit. Like i told you how i felt why are we talking about what you are going through when it has nothing to deal with me? my brain is really foggy so i dont know how to describe this but i was really careful with my words and tried my best to make them understand it wasnt just them and that its about me and my mental struggles of socialising. And it just felt like they ignored everything i said and just wanted to talk about themselves so i could comfort them.

It made me feel sick i couldnt stop crying, i was like a zombie for thursday and friday. I didnt know what to do with myself. Ive been there for [❤️] for like two years straight with barley getting any real support back and now that im asking for an equal relationship they are upset with me and want me to comfort them again. It made me genuinly angry by the weekend came around. Im never angry with anyone ever and im fuming.

Ive tried so so hard.

I ended up replying by saying that you arent feeling good and neither am i so lets get back to it when we both feel like we are in a mentally good place again. It felt good and mature and a good boundary kind of message.

But then [❤️] said dont be afraid to reach out when you are ready ill be waiting. if you need someone to talk to im here.

Which made me really confused and angry. i just told you my feelings and now you are putting the responsibilty on me to apologise and reach out when [❤️] is the one that made me feel left out? huh???

i dont want to think about it anymore T.T

On both thursday and friday [⭐️] asked if i was doing ok. I said i didnt want to talk about it but when they asked again on friday i told them a tiny surface level version and they supported me. It felt nice..

[🐈‍⬛️] was worried about me too and on friday when i was about to go home said i could talk to them if i needed.

I dunno its scary being open with people so i didnt tell them anything yet..

I just feel like im going to be a bother and it makes me feel sick like im poison. the two that reached out to me always comfort others so i dont want to trouble them more with another person to worry about. If it gets worse maybe ill talk to them.

My sis on friday kept telling me to talk to someone so i did manage to vent to [🍃]. I couldnt stop crying and they even stayed with me even tho their class started. They make me feel really happy and safe im so glad i have him.

I think thats all the update i have, its been scary going to school but [❤️] has been sick so i havent seen them since before everything happened. Im glad i got to see my mum this weekend it was the first time in a long time i vented to her and she made me see things more clearly.. she said everytime she hears about [❤️] its something bad thats happened so maybe its not healthy for us to be friends. Especially if they wont support me the same way back.

Its so exhuasting.

im so tired i dont want to think anymore..

[dapotatoauthor]

Do you take art trades, buddy?

not at the moment, no I have a test this week so uh yeah- Maybe around November or December I'll try to do it?? I literally never art traded with anyone other than my friend

[deobi-scenes]

friday the 13th — lee s.y.

genre | sad, romance

word count | —

notes | Here��s my first entry for inktober. Hoping you guys will like it as much as I had fun making it. This was actually based from something that is very dear to my heart because it happened to me. (not with an idol of course)

Hugs and kisses, always.

ps, this has a part two. Let me know if you want me to post it as well.

———

y/n’s POV

"I'm coming home!" I said excitedly over the phone informing Sangyeon that I was going back to Seoul for a couple of hours.

My family decided to move to Busan because of my father's job. Sangyeon and I rarely saw each other since then.

I was expecting to hear excitement from the other end of the line but all he said was,

"I'll pick you up."

'maybe he's just tired.

"eung. See you later." I said hanging up

I went to my dresser and changed into something more presentable. Feeling satisfied, I grabbed my coat and my bag.

"eomma, I'll be going." I said to my mom who was currently busy making food,

" say Hi to Yeonnie for me."

I nodded and waved good bye.

While waiting for the bus to arrive, I tried calling Sangyeon but he wasn't picking up.

'is he busy?'

my thoughts were interrupted when the bus finally came. I went in and sat by the window. In front of me, was an old couple who sweetly held their hands together

I smiled at the thought of me and Sangyeon growing old together. Since I began dating him three years ago, I have always imagined myself marrying and starting a family with him.

He was not only my ideal guy but also my greatest source of strength.

Him being an idol was hard at first because I knew that I was up against everyone else but luckily, we managed to make it work.

Despite his busy schedules, he always had time for me.

Our relationship was private, just the way we liked it.

Other than our families, the only people who knew about it was his members and his manager.

While the journey felt like forever, it comforted me when I saw Sangyeon’s figure across the bus stop. He waved his 'hand and waited for me to cross the street.

He led me to a car and opened the door for me,

"annyeong-oh, where's manager oppa?" I asked sitting on the pssenger's seat waiting for him to finish bucking his seat belt.

"I borrowed the car for a while." he said speeding off.

"I missed you." I said to him holding his hand

"me too. I got you coffee by the way." he said pointing at the cup.

"thanks yeon."

We stopped at a parking lot of a mall. Our usual dates consisted of drive thrus and dark places. It was very unlikely but it was the only way I could protect Sangyeon from scandals and issues that might affect his career.

"How are you?" I asked him as he removed his cap.

He held my hand and placed it on his face. Finally getting a glimpse of his eyes, I saw how different it looked.

"is there something wrong yeon?" I asked worriedly

finally letting his tears fall down, he gripped on my hand and cried.

"l-i'm sorry." he said

"why? what's wrong babe?" I asked unsure of what was going on

"you don't deserve this."

I cupped his face between my cheeks so that I could see him clearly

"m-make me understand please?" I said hesitantly as I finally hinted to where this would lead to.

"let's break up."

———

Sangyeon’s POV

"are you sure about this hyung?"Jacob asked making the other members look at me, obviously waiting for my response.

"I'm afraid I'm just keeping her from growing."

"noona will get devastated." Haknyeon added earning a nod from the rest of the room

"just let Sangyeon hyung do what he think is right. Let's not meddle with his business." Eric suddenly said, making us look at him surprised

"for once, serious Eric is right." Younghoon commented while looking at me straight in the eye.

It was the right thing to do.

———

y/n’s POV

"stop joking yeonnie." I said hesitantly while hugging him in my arms.

It was a repetitive series of him apologizing and crying which I did not understand,

'is this a prank?' I thought to myself since our anniversary was next month already

not embracing reality, I took a deep breath and asked him in my usual self.

"did I do something wrong? I mean, was there something I should work on."

"that's the point y/n. You didn't do anything wrong. You never did. All of the sacrifices, efforts and love was right."

"then why? make it make sense yeon." I said taking a deep breath.

If I was my usual self, I would be crying by now. But, as if I wasn't Shin y/n, I just kept a straight face, still trying to process everything that was going on

"I still want to do more things in life. I want you to explore life y/n. We only live once and I fear that am just holding you back."

He looked straight into my eye with his tear stained cheeks.

" W-we tried to make it work, right?"

"We did. You did well y/n." he said pulling me into a hug,

I didn't know where I had the courage to say those words because I wouldn't give up that easy.

However, even if tried I knew that he wouldn't change his mind.

I wanted the hug to last forever but I knew that it'll only hurt the both of us if I too, became vulnerable in front of him. I had to be strong, for us.

"I love you forever, yeon." I said to him finally removing myself from his hug. I wiped his tears away and smiled at him. Reassuring him that it was okay.

"I love you too, forever and always."

I took a deep breath and looked at the empty space in front of me.

"I guess, I should head home now. It's getting dark already. I wouldn't want to miss the bus."

"let me take you home."

"no, yeon. It's a long drive. Besides, I just might cry in front of you and beg you to stay. We wouldn't want that do we?" I said looking at him while fake laughing

He knew that I was faking it but he laughed too.

"let me take you to the bus stop at least?" he asked making me nod in response.

The car ride was the saddest ride in my life. The mood was grim and no one spoke. It was very different of how we were back then.

Nearing the bus stop. I stared at Sangyeon and admired his features.

I’ll miss this.

He was so close to me but he felt very distant. It was as if I couldn't reach him.

When we finally arrived, Sangyeon made a complete stop and suddenly cupped my face into his hands. He leaned in and kissed my cheeks.

"do amazing things, y/n."

'he leaned in again and kissed my lips

" let the world know how awesome you are."

for the last time, he leaned in a kissed my forehead.

"you'll always be in my heart, y/n."

All I could do was smile at him.

"so I guess, this is good bye?"

He nodded slowly as he painfully watched me remove my seatbelt and out of his arms,

After collecting my things, I went outside and asked him to roll the windows down.

"I'll be cheering for you! Make me proud!" I said to him waving goodbye.

He didn't move but he just looked at me. Knowing I would burst out in a minute, I snapped him out of his trance.

"yah, go now. It's getting dark." I said to him ushering him to go.

He smiled weakly at me and waved good bye. After rolling the windows up, he drove off, soon leaving me alone in the bus stop.

As if on cue, the rain started pouring making me laugh in sarcasm.

Finally letting the tears stream out of my eyes, looked at my phone to see Sangyeon and I's wallpaper.

But what made me cry even more wasn't the picture. Instead, the date posted on my screen.

"just my luck."

Friday, November 13th 2020.'

[leomitchellart]

So… about this latest Inktober controversy….

Time to begrudgingly chuck in my two penneth… (Remeber you can always press “J” to skip this post altogether)

As most of you may or may not know, Alphonso Dunn released a Youtube video wherein he publicly accused Jake Parker, and creator of the Inktober challenge, of plagiarising his book. Both of these men are public figures, artists specialising in pen & ink. In the video Dunn looks at the preview pages and flip through footage of Parker’s “Inktober All Year Round” and says they draw many similarities in the illustrations, language and layout that he used in his own book, “Pen & Ink Drawing”. Parker’s book was set to this month. Hense why Dunn only used footage and not a physical copy.

Since the video’s release, the art community has been very spilt down the middle. The book’s publisher has halted the launch of Parker’s book until the matter can be investigated. Even DeviantArt cancelled their own Inktober event thing (I’ll admit I don’t keep up with these things DA keeps doing). Parker has since released a statement in the matter. Now it’s up to the courts to decide what’s happening next. The video itself is an hour long, but it’s crucial to see it yourself. 

People are, understandably, outraged after seeing it. This seems like a shitty thing to rip-off Dunn - not to mention stupid. Since Dunn is the more popular pen & ink artist with more social media followers and name recognition. Many have called to boycott inktober and condemn Parker. I’ll admit, I was right alongside them at first, at least for feeling outraged. The similarities are there. But if YMS’s Kimba video has taught me anything, it’s that, even if an accusation of plagiarism may be obvious at a cursory glance, sometimes it’s important to take a more critical eye and do more research to learn that things aren’t as cut and dry as they first seem. If there’s a lesson I can take away from the internet as a whole, it’s that no one thinks about the consequences of mob mentality.

The most common defence of Parker is that because they’re both books about pen and ink drawing, then they’re inevitably going to be similar. I’ll admit that, when you pick-up so many art books, a lot of them will cover the same basic grounds of materials, tutorials, strokes, techniques etc. The parts about rendering textures on spheres and cubes isnt new. Look up “texture study” and you’ll see so many examples of artists rendering these kinds of things digitally. I’ve also noticed a common theme of people more formally educated in art pointing out how none of these are original. Everything down to the steps and illustrations are things they’ve learned from years ago. Since I'm a pen & ink artist, inspired by my love of comics, I have quite a few books about inking: Dunn’s included. I own both his books and still highly recommend them. I didn't even preorder Parker’s book. Ironically because I didn't think it could offer anything new that my other books hadn’t already.

While Ethan Becker took the time to cross-examine Dunn and Parker’s books with several others, there weren’t many of the ones I actually owned. So I looked to my shelves to see what I could find. Books like:

“The Art of Comic Book Inking” by Gary Martin & Steve Rude

“How Comics Work” by Dave Gibbons & Tim Pilcher

“The DC Comics guide to Inking Comics” by Klaus Janson

“Making Comics” by Scott McCloud

“Stan Lee’s How to Draw Comics”

I’m sure there’s plenty more examples out there. I was planning to go through all of these and take pictures. But ultimately that’s not the core point of these post. Plus it would’ve taken WAY too long and this post itself, is long enough.

Of course, none of the them are 100% close to Dunn’s in the way they’re displayed. Not as close as Parker’s could be considered. That being said, I know Dunn is trying to claim that he invented these techniques. The nucleus of the issue is how similar they are in terms of order and how these pages are displayed. Some I can chock-up to standard practice, while others seem more coincidental.

If there’s one thing I’m adamant about, it’s that I think that Dunn should’ve messaged Parker first before making the accusation public. Some try to dispute that this would've made it easier for Dunn to be “silenced”, whatever that means; but that sounds a bit conspiratorial to me. Ideally, you confront him about it in private, if he makes any threats or blows you off, get your lawyer on the phone and then make the video. Not only is it the more civil thing to do - but it’s the smarter thing to do. This is a serious legal matter, not just internet drama. While I’m sure Dunn had no intention of tearing Parker down or getting a mob onto him, that’s unfortunately what’s happened. A backlash both from the general artisan community and several companies. Wherein it was left to Parker himself to make this an official legal matter. If Parker’s found not guilty, then this could easily leave the gate open for him to sue Dunn for damages, loss of revenue, defamation of character or whatever else, should he see fit. As could the publishers, given how this affected their sales. Companies responded to the accusation of the video alone, before an investigation could be launched. Sure, it wouldn't be “acting the bigger man” but he’d be well within his right to do it. Dunn showed that Jake has mentioned him before, shown admiration for his career and referenced him in other posts. If it comes to light in court, that Dunn is even cited as an inspiration or source in the book itself, then it’s case closed. 

Then there’s the other possibility that Parker might not have done this on his own, but that he has a team behind the book. If that’s the case, the most I can accuse Parker of is being a hack. I worry Dunn has kneecapped himself for just how badly he’s handled this situation. Made worse by him not having an actual physical copy to assess and just had footage of preview pages to go on. So far, the circumstances don’t seem on his favour. 

I don’t think ill of Dunn. I do think he believes he’s been wronged and no malice in his intentions. I just think he’s made some critical errors on how to handled this. As for Parker himself, I couldn't give a donkey’s doo-dah about him. I’m sure you could accuse me of playing devil’s advocate earlier, but to me, he was the guy who released the annual prompt list. If it really does turn out that he’s a plagiarist and had malicious intent, then fuck ‘im. I never regarded him as an inspiration of mine or paid much attention to him outside of that. It was the community that made Inktober what it is. I’ve never met Parker. Maybe he’s a cool guy? Maybe he’s a bellend? I don’t know.

Granted this isn't the first time Parker has proved himself to be a controversial figure: - Last year people were upset about him trademarking (not copywriting, as many have erroneously claimed) the word “Inktober” and some artists were stopped from selling their related work or zines. Parker would issue a statement: claiming the takedowns were a mistake of “overzealous lawyers” and it’s just a matter of the logo being trademarked. People can sell their Inktober works and even mention they are Inktober-related. Just not use the official logo. On the one hand, from a business standpoint, I get it. It’s the bare minimum you need to do to protect your IP, especially when you have a store. BUT, like most people, I don’t like how, what’s intended as a community challenge, has slowly become more of a brand associated with one man. Hardly a surprise it left a bad taste in so many people’s mouths. But, since it doesn't actually effect anyone’s ability to take part in the challenge, outside of personal principle, I went ahead with it the previous year. 

 - The year before, when asked if one can do Inktober digitally, Parker said the following:

I know some are still bitter about that, but speaking as someone who inks traditionally and digitally, this came across as needless whinging and blowing things out of proportion. Claiming that Jake had derided digital artists and said they were invalid etc etc. Take it from me, challenging yourself to try out different methods to ink traditionally can greatly improve the work you do digitally. It’s like how learning traditional fundamentals of art can still be applied to digital. Plus he never said “No.” he just gave valid reasons about how it makes it a different experience. That said, if you’re someone who can’t afford any kind of inking equipment or pens and only have a selected application to draw on - then none of this applies to you. Just the aforementioned few who took it upon themselves to get angry over nothing. Recently I’ve heard from subscribers of his newsletter that he’s now embraced the idea of people doing inktober digitally, to the point of selling digital brushes for inktober. I’m sure some will call this “backsliding” or “money grubbing” because people aren’t allowed to change their minds or update their statements.

For weeks I’ve been torn on what to do, not being able to solidify one stance over another. One minute I thought #JusticeForAlphonsoDunn then I wonder “Wait maybe I should look again?” to “But wait, those are way too similar!” Having splinters in my arse from sitting on the fence for so long. The longer this went on, however, I began to realise that I can’t take one stance over another. This case is far too muddy and complicated. I don’t have enough sufficient knowledge or evidence. Nor do any of you. We literally only have Dunn’s video to go on. While it’s a good start, it’s not enough to be taken 100% as gospel when it’s the only thing to hand. 

As previously mentioned, a lot of artists have decided to not take part in Inktober at all, or follow different prompt lists. That’s completely fine. A lot of them are based around a specific theme: halloween, kinky stuff, bears, transformers, OCs, Disney or whatever. That has massive appeal. I just can’d do it myself. I prefer the focus on random words, rather than all centred on a single subject; allowing me to be creative with my ideas and execution. I actually did try to make a list of my own random words. Problem is, I worried that because I was choosing my own, I might be subconsciously bias towards certain prompts and not truly challenging myself. Even narrowing down my options was taking too long. In the end…. I’ve decided to just do the official prompts again this year.

For me, that’s what it ultimately came down to. TIME. It’s the middle of September. I can’t afford to wait for the court case to be settled. No other prominent artists I respect have released their own prompt lists. I know there’s been some shitty people who are condemning this choice. Attacking others, accusing them of supporting plagiarism, looking to block anyone who does the official prompts. Even trying to make this a racial issue. Just…. no. 

If someone doesn’t want to take part in Inktober, that’s fine. If someone wants to do the official prompts, that’s fine. If someone wants to do their own prompts, that’s fine.

Don’t go around aggressively making snap judgements or accusing people of taking a side. Do whatever makes you feel comfortable. This has been a shit year, let people enjoy something.

If you look at this situation and it makes you feel angry, and you don’t feel comfortable in taking part in a challenge because of it’s creator. I get that, I literally get that. It’s why I haven't done Mermay. And please don’t mention Pinktober, I’m aware of it, but given his insta video on the subject and the things he said, I quickly came to the conclusion that I can’t take this person seriously. I’m sure this might make me seem hypocritical, but how this differs, if only for me, is the sheer amount Inktober means to me. It’s more than a simple challenge. Inktober's the one thing I’ve been most excited about all year. As it was ruined for me in 2019, when I lost my home and I didn't get to complete every prompt. (Long story, I’m okay now). As we all know, 2020, has been an AWFUL year. We’ve got to take whatever joy we can. As I’ve looked longer at the official prompts, I found ideas I’m really excited for. 

Once I started to really dedicate myself to it, it became a massive event. I hype myself up as I prepare for the busy month. Buy in supplies, clean the house and workspace, cook and freeze meals in bulk to save time, printing off a sheet that allows me to jot down ideas as I plan ahead.  Then once it’s done, after so much work, it makes the reward all the sweeter: Ordering a takeaway, celebrating a great halloween night and still rocking those vibes throughout November. Feeling proud of myself for doing it and seeing myself improve my technique, discipline and earning a few lie-ins to make up for the sleep I lost working. I’m like a kid waiting for Christmas. That said, don’t think that there’s something wrong with you when you understandably can’t dedicate that amount time for a simple art challenge. If anything that’s plenty of reason to why you’re smarter than me. You have a life and don’t push yourself too much.

Now, I need to crack on with the preparations. If you want to boycott Jake Parker, just not buying any of his products should be enough. Doing the inktober challenge doesn't bring attention to him, as I doubt most people even know him as the creator, nor does it even line his pockets. I just hate how cancel culture can do such serious damage like this and then try and put pressure on others to act accordingly without even doing any research themselves. 

As long as you’re not harassing anybody. Just do what YOU want to do. That’s fine. 

[shrinkthisviolet]

Author Interview Tag!

Tagged by @maipreciation, thanks for thinking of me! This looks really fun :D

(Note: I’m keeping this as a running list, so if you’re ever wondering what fics im working on/brainstorming, make sure to check here! Last update was on 12/12/2020)

Name: Lavi! As of 12/5, I’m no longer going by my real name (see this post)

Fandoms: so many 😂 check my bio, I think I have them all listed. I’ve posted fic for Hamilton and ATLA, and then there was a huge Inktober compilation I posted last year with a whole host of fandoms. Currently, my major fandom is ATLA, and probably Kipo as I’m starting to move through S1

Where you post: I have an AO3 (lavi0123)! I used to have an FFN and a Wattpad, but I don’t use either of those anymore :/ tbh, I’m embarrassed of anything I still have up there 😂

Most popular one-shot: Most definitely we’ll give the world to you (and you’ll blow us all away), one of my contributions to Maiko Week! I’m not surprised it’s an ATLA fic, but I find it interesting that a fic with Izumi in it blew up so quickly. But hey, if y’all want more Izumi content, you won’t be disappointed 😉

Most popular multi-chapter fic: ...I’m really embarrassed to say because I don’t think I’ll ever finish it...but En Hamilton Heights is the only multichap fic I’ve published so it’s gotta be that one 😂 hopefully soon I’ll have another fic to add to that, since I’m working on one (sorry EHH fans but it’s been too long and tbh I don’t remember where I was going with it :/ I’m thinking I might orphan it)

Favorite story you’ve written so far: you think this world is a dream come true (but you’re wrong) for sure! It’s super niche but it’s something I wrote out of love for a movie I discovered this Halloween and absolutely love. Though all you’ve got to do is want something (and then let yourself have it) is a close second. Basically, anything I write that sounds absolutely bonkers as a concept is one that I love 😂 (and it’s no coincidence that both fics are Mai-centric! I love all my Mai-centric fics nearly equally)

Fic you were nervous to post: Is there an “all of the above” option? 😂 I’m always nervous to post. But in particular, I was nervous for if you ran away (come back home), because it was Mai-centric and longer than any one-shot I’d written thus far, and also you think this world is a dream come true (but you’re wrong), because it’s Mai-centric and a Coraline AU, which makes it BONKERS as an idea

Why was I nervous to post Mai-centric fics, you ask? Two reasons: 1) Mai is very different from who I am as a person (I vibe a lot more with Aang and Ty Lee, sometimes Katara and Sokka), so I didn’t want to upset the Mai stans by writing her incorrectly. 2) Mai is generally not well-liked in the fandom at large, so I especially didn’t want to attract antis who would accuse me of writing Mai as too emotional and loving (which is why I tried to justify that in my tags). Luckily, my comments have all been lovely, and I’m far less afraid to post fics about her now that I’ve written three fics with her as the focus! And the shoutout from @nonbinary-crafter-aang praising my portrayal of her?? I was touched 🥺 still am

How you choose your titles: Song lyrics or movie/book lines that speak to me, occasionally a pun. Remember that post I rb’d about how authors title their works? My tags pretty much say it all 😂

Do you outline: Ehh...define outlining 😂 for my one-shots, nope. But for my upcoming multichap works (see below) and Nanowrimo work (original fiction, so I won’t talk about it on here, but send an ask if you’re curious), YES ABSOLUTELY!

For my Nanowrimo work and one of my upcoming AUs (a Soulmate AU), the worldbuilding is so complex that it’s an absolute necessity. For the other upcoming AU (a time travel AU), there are just too many things that need to happen at certain times so as not to interfere with canon events, and things I want to change from canon and things I want to keep...I think you get the idea 😂

Complete: Basically my entire maiko halloweek series! Check it out if you want some fics about the most underrated canon ATLA couple :)

In-progress: ...En Hamilton Heights again...but not for long, sadly. Still trying to decide between a quick conclusion and just flat-out orphaning it. Still haven’t made up my mind, but either way, it won’t be what I originally planned, unfortunately.

I’m also counting my ATLA Soulmate AU on the basis of forever in my mind (only you), which has the worldbuilding and fits into the AU without much problem (the AU is going to be a series of one-shots, not a multichap fic, because there won’t be enough deviations from canon imo to justify multiple chapters. And one-shots are just less pressure for me 😂)

[EDIT 12/12/2020: added another fic because I’m an idiot and forgot about this too 🤦‍♀️😂 it’s a year-old idea that I started writing but I’m picking it back up thanks to the Heist banter in MatPat’s St Jude stream!]

-A fic series combining Escape the Night and Who Killed Markiplier (Heist and Date are part of it too, but only tangentially at the moment. Depends on how involved I want DA Y/N to be). Tentatively titled A Heavy Cost, and definitely won’t happen in any of Mark’s projects, but in a way that’s actually for the best 😂 the canonicity for me stops at ETN S3 (with some S4), then it’s canon divergence

Coming soon/not yet started: OOOH YESSS HERE WE GO

Okay okay sooo we’ve got two main things:

–An ATLA Soulmate AU, featuring platonic and romantic soulmates! I know I called it in-progress, and I stand by that even though I haven’t actually set up the series on AO3 yet, but this AU is about to be SO MUCH MORE than just a few Maiko moments. Because...drum roll...it’s gonna be entirely Aang-centric (with maybe one or two exceptions)! Like Mai, Aang is a character that doesn’t get as many -centric fics as he should (and being an Aang stan also isn’t unanimous for some reason??), so I’m gonna fix that. Plus I want to dive further into his mind, and I think I’m more equipped to do that than I was with Mai, since Aang and I are very similar in attitude.

–Bumizumi time travel AU, which can be read as platonic until the last couple chapters (it’ll be multichap) but definitely has a romantic agenda throughout. So just. Be warned if you don’t ship them. It’s gonna be chock full of comedy and antics! Also A LOT of platonic affection between Izumi and teen Zuko (and just between Izumi, Bumi, and the Gaang in general), because platonic affection is underrated and also I can :D I’m also probably gonna make fun of how some elements of affection have become solely romantic territory, because...um, no, hugging and holding hands and cuddling can be done between friends, thanks! (Maybe it’s the ace in me talking. But regardless)

There are also vague concepts I’m spitballing, like:

-Zukaang telepathy AU (Platonic Zukaang, the only romance I’ll ever write in ATLA is for the canon ships, prompted by a dream because apparently ATLA lives in my head rent-free forever now 😂)

-Evil Zuko AU (Azula doesn’t exist, mostly prompted after watching Aang make fun of Zhao and realizing that if Zuko had been in any position of power during the War...the Gaang would have stood no chance at all)

-Bumizumi Arranged Marriage AU (Bumi and Izumi both think the other is hotheaded/reckless (Izumi @ Bumi) or uptight (Bumi @ Izumi). So Kataang and Maiko (along with Sukka, Ty Lee, and Toph because...duh) set them up in an arranged marriage, with the presented reasoning being that they already know each other’s families, it’ll be a great symbol of unity, and this way Izumi doesn’t have to worry about suitors. They both agree to it (it’s arranged, not forced), and over time, they warm up to each other...and maybe even...fall in love?? Prompted because we need more arranged marriage fics! On that note, I’m gonna plug shadows and steel by @dearestpartnerofgreatness because arranged marriage needs more rep and this fic does it and with Maiko to boot!)

-Zukaang as Brothers AU (I saw a fic about this, but it wasn’t complete. If it’s not done by the time I get to this concept, I’m gonna write it, because just...imagine the possibilities! Zuko and Aang are already basically brothers in canon anyway, this is just making them brothers in blood as well as in their hearts. This is especially vague because I have no concept of how this is gonna work 🤷‍♀️ I’ll get to it eventually)

(Can you tell I’m obsessed with Zuko and Aang’s friendship? Because I am!)

[EDIT 11/25/2020: I’m adding two more because I forgot these have been swirling around in my head too 😂]

-A fix-it fic based on May You Always Be Satisfied, a backstory fic for Who Killed Markiplier by @blackaquokat! I recently reread it and remembered that I was gonna write a fix-it for that fic. Not because the fic sucks, it’s actually amazing! I’m just a sucker for the main (requited unrequited) pairing, and there’s at least five ways to make that pairing canon and avoid the mess of Who Killed Markiplier. And THEY ALL DESERVE TO BE HAPPY OKAY

-A Finnrey fix-it for the Star Wars Sequel Trilogy (this one is especially vague, and I probably won’t write it since a bunch of these already exist, but it’s fun to think about. Maybe if I ever run out of WIPs 🤷‍♀️)

Upcoming story that you’re most excited to write: I’m equally excited for the Soulmate AU and the Bumizumi Time Travel AU! I’m also excited for my Nanowrimo work to be finished, but that’s more so in-progress than upcoming

Tagging:

@nonbinary-crafter-aang @dearestpartnerofgreatness @ohsalamanders @blackaquokat (no pressure ofc, only if you want to! But please tag me if you do, I’d love to see it!)

[buri-art]

May 10, 2019. A crack fanartist of the Tumblr AkaYona community disappeared.

While some have accepted her prior statements about “being busy moving and starting a new career” and “wanting to focus on writing original novels” her other statements about “craving a mental juice cleanse from social media” leave the impression that she went willingly. Rumors state her ghost made an appearance, and even skeptics have noted the evidence left in her March 2020 archive.

Today, we bring you the latest update.

June 26, 2020:

 ---

( ° ∀ ° )ﾉﾞ‘Sup~~~~ Well, it’s been a year, and the Ask Box is back open, but don’t get excited yet, I’ll come back to the art topic in a moment. I have indeed been happy with being a social media hermit, but it’s not bad to drop in here and there. Here’s a general update:

No, no, I haven’t totally quit writing! But it would be totally dodging reality if I didn’t come out and admit why I am currently unable to produce any original or AkaYona content. 

You guys, I’ve got it so bad. Like, this is the most mainstream thing I’ve been into since Digimon was on Fox Kids, but it is seriously everywhere. Not only does that keep it on my mind almost constantly, but I have money now. All a candy company needs to do to get me to buy something I had no interest in is slap a favorite character or two on the package (and those candies were disgusting, yet I did not regret that purchase).

Now, besides giving myself permission to set aside the writing I made progress on, I have generally been on an art slump. I still doodle, but I feel like my art has gotten much worse. Back when I was active drawing for the AkaYona fandom, I never had a lack of things to draw; no matter how dumb the joke or uninspired the art, I always knew I had an audience. 

Now that I have chosen generally not to have any social media audience, there is some pressure to draw “nice” art with wide appeal that I could show anybody. And I’ve drawn, what, maybe three pieces like that? In general, even if I do want to draw, I just don’t have any ideas, and I feel very out of practice. Now, yes, that does bring me back to KnY, but hold your horses, this isn’t turning into a KnY Tumblr!! My watchers are here for AkaYona, not sudden KnY spoilers!! But, yes, I did get a few dumb ideas, and when I get dumb ideas, I draw them, and I made a separate Tumblr to post them so that no one would get spoiled. Now, the really funny part is that my KnY art has virtually gone completely unnoticed for most of its existence out there on the web. XDD Which is fine, there is a lot of good content out there for this fandom, and I’m not used to drawing these characters, so it felt awkward anyway. Let’s return to writing for a moment. Seeing as I have been obsessed with KnY but also generally not getting involved in fandoms, that leaves me to scream at people who know me irl (teeheehee, sorry) about how much I love it, and while telling a friend how much I suffered after reading Chapter 201, and a few ideas I had on how Shueisha might drag the series out or force a sequel, she gave me a tiiiiiiiiiiny bit of encouragement that she would be an audience if I wrote that AU, and 10 days later, I HAD THE WHOLE 60K+ FIC WRITTEN BECAUSE I AM A MONSTER. No, seriously, I didn’t even think for the first couple days that I would actually write it, and then I got a slew of more ideas, and then when I hit my stride, I HAD A DAY WHEN I AM PRETTY SURE I WROTE 20K WORDS WITHIN 20 HOURS AND I AM SO UPSET I DIDN’T PAY MORE ATTENTION TO MEASURE THAT BECAUSE I’M PRETTY SURE THAT WOULD BE A PERSONAL RECORD.

Phew, so anyway. I would like to say I was human again after finishing BUT NOPE, I WAS STILL IN THAT HEAD SPACE AND STARTING COMING UP WITH STUPID JOKES TO BREAK THE TENSION IN MY OWN FANFIC and then I started drawing dumb omake. And then as I kept drawing, I found it. I found my flow again. I actually put some effort into some of those omake. I really liked how they came out. I mean, no one cares about silly omake doodles for an AU fanfic, but I HAD SO MUCH FUN, and that is what McFreakin’ counts.

And that is what brings me back here.

If you are a Kimetsu no Yaiba fan and have read the whole manga, here is my canon divergent AU fic, and there are links to my other Tumblr in each chapter. I’m a liiiittle eager for comments because I am a monster and this is part of what social media does to monsters, but the whole dang thing is already written and I love it anyway even without an audience. But for those of you who would just like to see AkaYona art, or more general Buri-art, that is why I will probably occasionally pop back in here. Like I said, the Ask Box is open, but I won’t check it regularly and will only draw things if I feel inclined. I am also playing with the idea of doing Inktober again this year, and since I have zero interest in Twitter or Instagram, the art would get posted here.

┐(︶▽︶)┌ That is all. Thank you for reading my rambles! See you around a little more at random?

[currantlee]

Should we boycott Inktober 2020? (+ Inktober Alternatives)

In short: Yes, we should. If you use the #Inktober, you’re promoting Jake Parker’s brand, which has been involved in some questionable practices, most recently including alleged plagiarism.

So, if you haven’t heard of this already: Jake Parker, the inventor of Inktober, allegedly plagiarized his book - or at least, it has a lot of uncanny similarities with Alphonso Dunn’s book Pen & Ink Drawing: A Simple Guide. I’d go into further detail, but Mr Dunn already posted a video that covers pretty much everything about this issue himself, which I highly recomment watching.

Ever since this was made public, people have been debating on whether Inktober 2020 and Inktober in general should be boycotted / cancelled. This has gotten to a new dimension after Jake Parker’s response to the claims in which he denied everything despite the fact that he literally copied some of Dunn’s wording. Overall his entire response comes off as very manipulative to me, especially seeing as he doesn’t even mention Dunn’s name and instead laments the fact that Dunn made it a public issue rather than reaching out to him privately. As many people have pointed out before, Dunn would likely have been silenced by Parker or his lawyers if he had taken that route.

So, here is my two cents on that. However, before you click on “Keep reading”, I’d love to remind you that I’m a human and not some holy book of ethics and morale. You can disagree with everything I’m saying here, I won’t fault you for it if you do. This is just my opinion on the matter and I wanted to share it in order to spread some awareness to what is happening.

That being said, let’s get into this. It’s going to be a long ride everyone.

Why I think we should boycott Inktober

If you aren’t aware of the drama around the #Inktober that has been going on since late 2019: don’t worry about it. The world and the internet are both huge places. There is no way to be aware of what is going on all the time.

That being said - let me be clear with this once more: this is merely my opinion. I personally can’t support the challenge and / or the #Inktober with what has been going on recently. However, if you don’t think that way, this is totally fine for me. Just because I can’t stand behind it from an ethical point of view and decide to boycott for this reason, that doesn’t mean you have to. Ethics and morals are a very personal matter and they differ from person to person. Which is not always a bad thing by the way, but that’s another story for another day.

Why I am sharing my opinion in that case? Because while this is how I think - I know not everybody is aware of what has been going on and I want to inform more people, enable them to make their own decision based on their own opinions and morals. And yeah - maybe influence said decision a little to match my own. I’d be lying if I said that this didn’t play it’s part.

What is the recent drama?

In short: Jake Parker, who created the Inktober hashtag, has decided to trademark the term and the logo so he is the only person able to make money off of it without asking for permission.

This video offers a pretty good rundown on what happened, so I’m going to leave the link here. If you don’t want to watch - here is the summary: in late 2019, Amazon suddenly started to send out Cease and Desists to independent artists who were selling books with titles that included the word Inktober. It turned out that Jake Parker has trademarked the term since 2017 and there were now guidelines on making money off of Inktober, which nobody had been previously aware of, seeing as Parker hadn’t announced it or posted said guidelines anywhere. To make matters worse, he only posted them after public pressure. And there are some other inconsistencies with his behavior that the video is touching on.

Let me be clear: trademarking something you created and that got immensely popular, like Inktober did, is not inheritly wrong in my opinion. Because if you don’t trademark it, someone else will. That’s what happened with the Smiley in the 1970s.

However, if you trademark something like this, then you should make the guidelines on making money of something that was previously public property and is now yours alone clear from the beginning in order to avoid something like this from happening. In addition, I think that if you do this, you shouldn’t trademark your idea to be the only one able make money off of it, but to protect it from harm (like others claiming your idea or inappropriate merchandise being produced). That’s just my view on it though and I wouldn’t bring it up if it weren’t for the other things that happened.

Now, Parker was clearly intent on making money off of Inktober, seeing as he is working on a book titled Inktober All Year Long. However, if it was this alone, it wouldn’t be a problem. The problem is that said book was allegedly plagiarized - or at least heavily borrowed concepts, from Alphonso Dunn’s book Pen & Ink Drawing: A Simple Guide (link to amazon.com). If you want more details on this, I again heavily suggest watching Dunn’s video on the matter or, if you don’t want to watch a video that’s almost an hour in length, any other YouTube video on the subject. At this point, there are several out there, so you just have to type into the search bar.

What is my problem with the situation?

To make this clear, let me clarify what isn’t my problem first.

My problem is not that Jake Parker trademarked Inktober. My problem is not that he is publishing a book titled Inktober. My problem is not even that he wants to be the only person to publish a book with Inktober in the title.

My problem is how he is handling all of this.

First up, I said this before: if you trademark something that was previously a public domain, you either don’t change anything about the rules and merely take the rights to protect your property from harm (like being trademarked by others who want to profit off of it or use it in a way that you can’t support) or you make the new rules clear to begin with.

What Parker did, however, was trademarking Inktober in 2017 and not making the rules clear until late 2019 after public backlash. And instead of apologizing for what happened he tried to blame Amazon for the mess. To be fair: yes, Amazon was the party that send out the C&Ds to the affected artists, not Parker or one of his lawyers. However, it could have been avoided if Parker had made the new rules clear from the beginning. So yeah, it is partly his fault, even if he didn’t send out the C&Ds.

Secondly, Parker’s behavior seems very manipulative and greedy to me. There is nothing wrong with wanting to make money off of your intellectual property - because the reality is that the world we live in requires us to make money. However, I think money should never be the top priority for a person, no matter what they are doing.

It seems to me like this isn’t the case for Parker though. This goes back to an Inktober drama in the past, where he spoke out against digital artists who wanted to do Inktober because it was supposedly not real inking or something like that. However, nowadays he seems to be fine with digital artists. Why? Well, as someone pointed out on Twitter this change of mind corresponded with Parker getting a partnership with Adobe. And while this could definitely be coincidence, it just adds to the picture of someone who is greedy if you take other things he did in account. I might be very nitpicky - and wrong - here, but this is just how I feel about it.

Parker also has a tendency to claim that he “would never do something like that” or that he “did never want that” when something goes wrong and place the blame on others (such as Amazon and now, with the plagiarism scandal, on Alphonso Dunn - without even mentioning his name, allegedly so no one checks Mr Dunn’s book or video out and comes to the same conclusion as he did). As someone who has been raised by a parent with a supposedly narcisstic personality, I know this pattern of behavior very well. Let me be clear here: I don’t want to say that Parker is a narcisst - I’m not a psychologist and aside from that, I don’t know him personally. I only know what he has been doing on the internet. That’s way too little to determine something like that. All I want to say here is that this pattern of behavior heavily reminds me on what my parent did to me. To me, that’s a clear red flag.

And even if he never wanted those things, even if he isn’t trying to be manipulative: he is still guilty of being careless.

And lastly... Don’t plagiarize. Never. Ever. Do that! No matter if you’re an artist, a scientist, an author, you just don’t do that! If you have sources - or even major inspirations - credit them! Not only do you express respect and love for something that way, you also acknowledge their work and might help them to get some more exposure and / or recognization. You might inspire others to have a look at what inspired you, something you love.

How does this tie into the #Inktober?

Simple. By using the hashtag, you’re using the name of Parker’s brand and the title of his allegedly plagiarized book. Therefore, you are promoting said brand and book, even if you don’t want to. That is the reason why #Inktober should be boycotted in my opinion, at least until Jake Parker has (properly!) apologized for his actions.

Making mistakes is human, however, mistakes usually cause harm. That’s why we apologize! And because everyone of us makes mistakes, that’s why we forgive. However, there is no forgiveness without a proper apologize.

So yeah. Until the proper apologize happens - if it ever will (I doubt it to be completely honest, but if it happens, I’m open for it) - I am boycotting Inktober, and I think you should as well. If you still want to do it, that’s totally fine though. However, if you are like me and want to do something else now: here are some suggestions for you!

Alternatives to Inktober

Someone on Twitter has already compiled a pretty much complete list of every alternative October drawing challenge to Inktober. Because I am lazy - and they get to the point much faster than I am - I’m leaving the link here. However, there are some additional drawing challenges not in the list (at least the last time I checked), so here they are.

QUEERtober

If you’re part of or support the the LGBTQAI+ community, you might like this challenge created by KreuzUndQueer on Twitter. One prompt is for three days instead of one and the prompts generally deal with LGBTQAI+ themes.

DRAWlloween

This is another popular drawing challenge, although it has more to do with Halloween than with daily prompts as far as I am aware. The goal is to create something awesome related to the Halloween season. Depending on the host of the challenge, there might be additional rules as well.

Tumblr Inktober Alternatives

This is a short list I compiled last evening. I’m sure that there are plenty more awesome, but I can’t include every single one of them, so I just included my three favorites so far.

First up, we have of course the Boycottober Prompts by @h0tleafjuice, Chardesair and Sleepingdreams_ (both on Instagram), which I’m also thinking about tackling because I think they’re awesome and I have some ideas for.

If you want to go with a more witchy theme for this October, then @gnomehuts‘ Witchtober Prompts might be the right prompt list for you.

If you like Disney, or if you’re like me and you love Kingdom Hearts so much that you find a way to mention said game franchise in an anti-Inktober posting, then you might like the Disn-ober Prompts by @hermioneblack. There are no rules for the challenge and the prompts, just from what they are, can be used for non-Disney related stuff as well.

Change the rules, name or create your own challenge!

What you can of course also do is to just make up your own art challenge. You can just create your own prompt list, your own rules for Inktober, your own name for Inktober (popular suggestions as of now are Artober, Drawtober and Notinktober), even an entire challenge.

As an example, I took up the challenge of creating a Halloween Story with five chapters this year, which I am also going to illustrate (or at least... I’ll try to do that).

Use the #Inktober without actually participating in Inktober

The idea of this is to change the meaning of the #Inktober - by posting stuff that is either criticizing Jake Parker’s actions and Inktober in general or just... Stuff that really doesn’t belong there (such as memes), if you’re more of a trolly person.

Now, I personally don’t hold anything against trolls - in fact, I have trolled myself in the past - as long as they’re not overdoing it and are ready to face possible consequences of their trolling (such as people getting annoyed because the #Inktober is being spammed with memes). However, be aware that in case you decide to take the trolling route, you’re still promoting Jake Parker’s brand (depending on what kind of meme you post under the #Inktober). Therefore, I’d advocate against the trolling route in this instance.

And that’s it! If you’ve made it this far - or even if you only read part of this post - thank you so much for reading! I hope that no matter what you decide to do, you’re going to have a wonderful time and a wonderful October / Halloween season.

Happy creating!

[luxusnoname]

A Long Forgotten Ache, Pt.1 (Xigbar/Vexen)

Summary: Being a Nobody is easy without all of those messy emotions weighing you down. Still, Xigbar gets to thinking and maybe he misses it a little. Or, rather, he misses someone. But he never goes about things in a straightforward way. The first half of a two part fic.

Characters/Pairings: Xigbar/Vexen

Rating: T (swears, fighting & some blood, nbd)

Word Count: 2.6k

Author’s Note: Part two is technically done, but I definitely want to do some quality edits before posting. Both parts were actually written last year with inktober prompts, but ended up fitting together nicely as one story. I made a lot of improvements to this portion and want the continuation to be on that same level. So in the meantime… Happy 2/4 ^^

~~~

A Long Forgotten Ache

When Xemnas asked Xigbar who he wanted with him on a recon mission in a world with no magic, the freeshooter was perhaps too quick to volunteer Vexen. He could tell that answer wasn’t exactly what the Superior expected.

“Are you… Quite sure? You wouldn’t rather have Xaldin or Lexaeus accompany you?”

“Look, I know he’s the resident egghead and not exactly our best fighter, but he’s the only one around here with an eye as sharp as mine. Well, almost.” Xigbar grinned and pointed to his good eye to reinforce the point. “Yeah the other two have brute strength, but I could really use his intuition on this one.”

That, of course, was only part of the reason. Vexen was also incredibly fun to agitate. The rise he could get out of him wasn’t the same as it used to be, but it was better than anyone else in the Organization. Plus, they hadn’t spent much time together since becoming Nobodies. He would lie if he wasn’t a little curious as to how much of Even was still left. But personal curiosity and entertainment didn’t make for a good argument, so he said nothing more.

Xemnas hummed to himself, considering. “I suppose that would work. But see to it that he’s capable of defending himself without his magic, should there be any difficulties on the mission. You’ll depart at the end of the week.”

Xigbar gave a flippant salute as he summoned a corridor to the academic’s lab. “You got it, boss.”

As expected, Vexen was less than pleased with Xigbar’s request. Something about his talents being best utilized for research, having no interest in a fruitless recon mission, and honestly Xigbar kinda stopped listening at that point because it turned into a full on laundry list of reasons why he had better things to do and he would not be wasting his time with this.

“See, but here’s the thing,” Xigbar cut in a few minutes into the scientist’s rant, knowing full well he’d be there all day otherwise.  “I’m not just asking you politely. These are orders straight from the top.”

Vexen sputtered, nearly dropping his beaker full of who knows what chemical. “Lord Xemnas himself picked me for this assignment?”

“Well, I made a case for you but yeah, boss man’s orders.”

Vexen finally turned from his experiment and narrowed his eyes at the freeshooter. “If you made a case for me, then I suppose my only way of getting out of this is to make a case against myself. Provided, of course, that’s an option.”

“Heh, you’re welcome to give it a shot,” Xigbar shrugged, “be my guest. But I really doubt he’s gonna budge on this one. I was pretty convincing.”

“We’ll see about that…”

In the next morning’s meeting, Vexen made his case. Or, rather, he tried to make his case. It had only been five minutes and most of the Organization was tuning out. Luxord shuffled and cut his deck, starting up another game of solitaire. Xaldin leaned back in his seat, appearing to nap with his eyes closed. Zexion rolled his eyes as the others quietly chatted amongst themselves. Eventually Xemnas cleared his throat, interrupting the academic and regaining the attention of the meeting.

“While your research is of remarkable importance to the Organization, so is this mission and every other mission we undertake. Do you mean to suggest that the orders I give are frivolous?”

“Of course not, but Lord Xemnas-”

The Superior shot him a withering glare that silenced him once and for all. “My word is final, Number IV. You are going on this mission and I’d rather be certain that you’re prepared for it. Whatever form that preparation takes is up to Xigbar.”

As Xemnas disappeared from the room, uncomfortable glances were exchanged among the remaining members before leaving to begin their own missions. Xigbar shot Vexen a smug grin, receiving an irritated huff in return.

After the meeting, the scientist pulled him aside in the Grey Area. He was slightly subdued after Xemnas’ scolding, but Xigbar could tell if he had emotions that he’d be fuming inside.

“While I believe our Superior has far too much confidence in you, I have no other choice but to comply. So how would you like to do this?”

His lips curled into a cheshire grin. “Meet me back here later tonight and I’ll brief you on the mission. Tomorrow morning, we’ll spar so I can test your readiness.”

Vexen gave no indication that he would comply as he stomped off into a corridor, but Xigbar knew he would show. He may grump and argue until he’s blue in the face, but he followed orders. That was one thing that hadn’t changed about him. About Even.

Xigbar caught himself smirking - no, smiling - at the thought of the academic’s Somebody name. Huh. Despite it all, maybe he hadn’t changed much himself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning found Xigbar waiting for Vexen in the Hall of Empty Melodies. It was his favored room for training because of all the different ways he could manipulate it with his spatial powers, but he also found himself going there to organize his thoughts when his own room became too stifling. He perched himself on the balcony, one knee drawn nearly up to his chest and the other dangling over the edge.

It wasn’t often that Xigbar found himself pondering his past life. He was essentially still Braig, after all, just without all of those messy emotions. And boy had Braig been a mess. Drifting through life and never getting too attached to any person or place for long, bonds weren’t really his thing. It was strange when he found himself becoming one of the Apprentices. 

Ansem was never much more than his employer, to be honest. The man had taken him in, sure, but the guy was the king of Radiant Garden. To consider him a colleague would have been laughable. Really, he spent the most time with Dilan and Aeleus. They were two of the only people he’d ever considered friends. He got on their nerves and he knew it, but he never pushed it too far (though they might argue with that.) But they never got seriously upset with him. Not like Even.

Even. The academic was skeptical when Braig showed up. Understandably so, but did the cold shoulder really have to be so cold? It was no surprise that the man was a master of ice magic; everything about him was frigid, from his stuffy posture to the very air around him. But it only made Braig want to get closer, to get past the ice and warm him up… 

Heh, now those were some thoughts he hadn’t had in a while. All in all, it hadn’t been too bad there at the end. He had coworkers and a routine and a life. A place to call home, despite never having asked for any of it.

And then he gave it all up.

Did he regret it? Sometimes.

There were moments, when they began falling to darkness, when he considered the consequences of his actions. He hadn’t meant for them to be caught up in everything, but then again, how could it have been avoided? He never once went back on his word to the old man, but he’d be lying if he said there were never nights where the guilt gnawed at him, moments he looked at Ienzo and saw a boy that would never truly grow up because of him.

But that was the old life. He stirred out of his thoughts and assessed the room below him. Vexen wasn’t there yet, but would be showing up soon. Xigbar dropped down onto the main platform. He wasn’t sure what to expect from this fight, but he was hoping to be surprised. 

Even had never been the physical type, relying on his magic for self defense. But there was a noticeable difference between Even and Vexen. Despite lacking emotion, there was something about him that suggested fire beneath the Nobody’s icy surface. Or so Xigbar hoped.

“Apologies for being late, I didn’t want to be here.”

Xigbar smirked at the approaching scientist. “About time. I was starting to think you got cold feet and stood me up. You ready?”

“If I have to be,” he grumbled.

With a nod, Xigbar unzipped and shrugged off his coat. The freeshooter still had the standard uniform of black shirt and pants on underneath, but made a show of dramatically rolling his shoulders and cracking his neck. He snuck a look at Vexen, who was watching with no expression save for a raised eyebrow.

“You failed to mention we’d be disrobing for this,” he muttered, his eyes drifting up and down Xigbar’s form. The freeshooter wondered if he was conscious of it or not.

“C’mon, you call this disrobing?” Xigbar barked out a laugh, peeling off his gloves and throwing them down. “Don’t tell me you’re going commando under there.”

“Well of course not, but-”

“It does wonders for mobility, trust me.”

With an exaggerated sigh, Vexen grumbled to himself as he shed his own jacket. Xigbar couldn’t recall ever having seen the man’s arms bared before - well, mostly bared. His broad shoulders had always been obvious, so it shouldn’t have been too surprising when the scientist wasn’t as scrawny as he’d imagined. Of course, Xigbar couldn’t really talk because apart from Zexion, he was definitely the smallest of the Apprentices in both stature and mass. He gave an appreciative nod before getting into a fighting stance.

Vexen copied the motion as best he could. His form was a little loose, suggesting the lack of experience that Xigbar had expected. But that’s why they were there, right?

He knew the answer before he even asked, but gave Vexen the benefit of the doubt anyway. “You ever done this before, Snowflake?”

“No,” he admitted, “but I don’t seem to have much of a choice in the matter, now do I?”

“Damn straight. After I’m through with you though? You’ll be more than ready for the mission.”

At Vexen’s nod, Xigbar gave a silent countdown. Three. Two. One. Without giving Vexen a moment to think, he lunged and closed the distance between them, hoping to catch him off guard with a swift uppercut. To his surprise, the blow was deflected with relative ease. He took a step back to reassess his opponent.

“Well well well,” he huffed, “I should’ve known the nerd could block a punch. I was gonna take it easy on ya, but now…”

Trailing off, he moved back in and followed up with a series of hooks and jabs, all of which Vexen managed to block. And with each passing second, each failed attempt, the scientist was looking more and more smug. He knew the freeshooter had underestimated him.

As they circled each other, the room silent save for their labored breaths and footfalls, Xigbar grew impatient. He hadn’t managed to land a single hit yet. It wasn’t as if he’d gone into the sparring match with the express purpose of beating on the academic, but he just didn’t understand how he was doing so well. Sure, Vexen wasn’t exactly firing back, instead focusing all of his efforts on defense, but Xigbar was no stranger to a fist fight. So what gives?

And it was then that he remembered Vexen’s signature wasn’t a weapon at all, but a shield. Well, he’d just have to give him something he couldn’t block that easily. He locked eyes with the academic before lunging again.

As expected, Vexen was ready for the attack, dodging the first hit and continuing to deflect the rest. After a few more unsuccessful blows, Xigbar saw his opening and took it. The freeshooter threw all of his weight into a tackle, grabbing the man’s wrists as they both went down.

He sat up, slightly dazed and his own body sore from the fall, but kept the scientist’s arms pinned to the ground. And the momentary look of shock on Vexen’s face - if he could feel shock, anyway - was well worth it. The scientist looked down to see Xigbar straddling his waist and shot him a sneer.

“I didn’t realize this was a grappling match as well,” he hissed between shallow breaths.

Xigbar gave a toothy grin. “Can’t have you being the only one full of surprises, now can I?”

He kept Vexen pinned a few seconds longer, looking down at him. The academic was a mess of blonde hair and faux anger, his chest rising and falling in an uneven rhythm as he caught his breath. He glared at Xigbar, waiting for him to say or do something. Daring him to make a move. And so without a second thought, Xigbar dipped his head and pressed his lips to Vexen’s in a fleeting kiss.

Or, what was meant to be fleeting. The kiss was unexpectedly returned, Vexen’s mouth parting with a quiet ‘mmph’ before falling into sync with Xigbar’s. Something sparked in the sharpshooter’s chest - a long forgotten ache, right where his non existent heart should be. He pulled back, unable to keep his jaw from going slack as he stared down at Vexen. The man’s face was a mirror of his own, almost as if he was equally surprised at the reciprocation. Unless… he felt it too? Xigbar almost thought he saw color beginning to tinge the man’s cheeks when-

CRACK.

In his moment of distraction, Vexen had freed his right hand and swung with all of his remaining strength, landing a solid blow against the freeshooter’s face and effectively knocking him off.

Xigbar clutched at his bleeding and likely broken nose, eye wide with shock. His breath came in gasps as he stared at Vexen. “… the fuck?”

Vexen stood up and grabbed his jacket, furiously brushing his hair back into place. His face was definitely turning red and for a moment Xigbar could swear he was looking at a flustered Even, not the heartless Nobody that had just decked him.

“I’ll see you on the day of the mission, and not a moment before.” He gave the sharpshooter one last glare before disappearing into a dark corridor.

Xigbar couldn’t even think straight as he tried to process everything that just happened. The fight was over quicker than expected. Shit, had he technically lost? Did he just get his ass handed to him by Vexen? All because of some… stupid tingling in his chest that shouldn’t have even been there in the first place. Or at least, it hadn’t been in a long time. Why had he done that?

He laid down, head thunking against the floor as he clutched at his still bleeding nose. Well, maybe it wasn’t all bad. Vexen wouldn’t be telling anyone about their little match after that stunt, so at least his dignity was spared. But that was the least of his concerns at the moment.

In private, Xermnas had confided in him that regrowth of one’s heart was theoretically possible. It was gone now, but he still felt the ghost sensations of a pulse, the flickering of a flame that had long gone out. Maybe there was something to that theory after all. Not that he’d be reporting this back to their Superior any time soon. Or ever.

Instead, it might be worth it to look into the phenomenon on his own. And if he played his cards right, Vexen might willingly help him. He allowed himself a chuckle before closing his eye. After all, research was easier with a partner.

[catsitta]

Handle With Care - Post Mortem

When I first started writing Handle with Care, it was going to be 100 chapters long and there were a few key differences in the plot. These changes occurred generally slowly as I gained a better understanding of my world and characters, while some shifted dramatically due to my feeling they were thematically inappropriate for the story I wanted to tell. So with the conclusion of the main fic and its various continuations, I decided to detail a little more in how I approached a 100 word daily drabble fic, and why certain events occurred or why certain characters played certain roles. This post is mostly for the folks out there who like all the nitpicky background information that goes around in the author’s head while writing.

100 WORDS A DAY

In choosing to write 100 words a day, I gave myself both a goal and a challenge. 100 words is often little more than a paragraph. Maybe two. I often found myself writing on my commute into work or during lunch on my phone, because while 1000 might feel overwhelming, 100 is not. Right? Yet some days I found just enough time to type up 100 words between work and other commitments (October was interesting, since I did Inktober and well as Promptober, on top of my usual working schedule). But the most challenging part was not writing 100 words. Writing 100 words was easy. Writing ONLY 100 words was where things became tricky.

In my original intentions for this fic, scenes were not supposed to span over multiple chapters. Each drabble was to be a self contained snapshot of time. But as the story became more emotionally centered, I shifted away from that idea and focused more on making each drabble exist as a chapter. Chapters can have cliffhangers. But they need to communicate a thought. An idea. A feeling. With 100 words a day, my objective became: Progress the story in a meaningful way or communicate some important information to the audience. With 100 words, there was often little room for getting lost in details.

Now one my ask again, why 100?

100 is the number of words in the definition of a drabble. 100, again, is an easy minimum to reach. But when you are used to writing 2-3k word chapters, flexibility is minimal and you have to decide what needs to be said, and what you were saying to fill space. And I found it a wonderful learning experience and valuable exercise as a writer. I’ve attempted to start drabble fics in the past, but rarely did they ever get past a couple chapters before I would get frustrated by the limitations. Because let’s be honest. Writing a 25,000 word story, 100 words at a time, is a test of one’s patience as much as anything else.

THE STORY

Handle with Care was originally supposed to be pure romantic comedy with just a splash of darker undertones in the background for color. But as much as I love fluffy comedies, as I wrote, there were conflicts that I didn’t feel should be glossed over. As some of my long term readers and commenters will know, I’m terribly fond of bitter with my sweet. Angst with my fluff. The bad things in life make the good all the brighter. And conflict drives a story forward.

So what changed?

There were many different variations on how Sans ended up raising Papyrus alone. Some took our overbearing science dad, Gaster, and outright cast him in the role of a villain as opposed to a mid story antagonist. Straight into, why aren’t you in jail, territory. Others barely featured Gaster at all, as he was disconnected from Sans after his son didn’t end up pursuing a ‘productive’ career in the sciences. There were even a couple considered drafts where Papyrus and Edge did have another parent and the reason Sans was distrusting and cagey was because of a broken Soulbond. (And for those of you who were Web/Sans theorists, well, there was a version where you weren’t wrong! Sans started an affair off with Web after the LOADs began as a sort of ‘regain control of his life’ thing.)

What may interest folks is that the story was originally not supposed to end with a wedding and a house in the planning. The happy ending was going to be less sugar and more height of the moment drama. Around the time Frisk intimidates Red into silence, she was going to instead start him on the path to discovering answers. No confessions from Sans. No journals. Instead Red goes on the hunt for clues and gets fragments of the story from different people, especially Gaster and Frisk. It was all quite emotional, but the pacing felt off, and I felt it would be more rewarding if Sans grew as a character and he was the one to confess all his secrets.

Another altered thread was Red being only Web’s son. Early, early on, Red was the product of Web and some other monster. I even considered that monster having died in birth with Edge. But I scrapped that quickly, and decided that instead, Edge was Pap’s twin, and that the grim mood Web was in, was because of what he saw as well as what he remembered from past timelines. He almost watched his friend and coworker dust in his arms. Properly traumatic, eh?

There is a completely cut scene that I may write in the spin off that goes more into detail about Red’s similarities to Gaster, and Sans’ to Web, and how people often choose partners that are like their parental figures. You may ask. Wait. What do you mean? Well, Webdings didn’t smoke. He drank. Red, despite having dabbled with the stuff, is never shown to drink recreationally or get drunk in the fic, for more reasons than being underage to do so. However, it is very lightly implied that Sans’ coping method of choice is alcohol, though Red quickly quashes this habit after the drunkenness incident. Now, who else smokes? Gaster. Sans doesn’t like that Red smokes (for obvious reasons it reminds him of his father and Red does try to quit in the fic, though ends up falling back on it when stressed.) There are other similarities if you look close. It’s one of the reasons that Gaster and Red don’t get along. They’re both strong personalities, and can be pretty quick to pass judgement on someone.

THE CHARACTERS

As many folks picked up on, Handle with Care, has multiple meanings. It is a moving pun based on the CAUTION: FRAGILE | Handle with Care, labels on the sides of some boxes. It is also one of the main themes of the fic itself. Everyone in the story is a person with their own pasts and pains, which makes them fragile in different ways. And some of them even represent different types of relationships and people we encounter in our lives.

Red - Our protagonist. He’s a young man picking up the pieces of his life after his father’s apparent suicide, left to raise his baby brother when he was only sixteen. He’s the child of an alcoholic and forced to take on an adult role too young. As a result, he has a few unhealthy coping mechanisms, struggles with his temper and his sense of self worth. But he’s the one that got out. That put his life on the straight-and-narrow.

Sans - The love interest. Grew up young from the sheer expectations in his life. He was never without, but when the LOADs happened, he cracked under a lifetime’s worth of pressure. He broke down. Stopped trusting anyone, including himself. And very likely only kept himself from Falling because of Papyrus. Much of his struggles is based on the single mothers who would say that their child is what saved them or got them through those darkest time by just existing. He is also the individual who was groomed for success that ended up with absoluting no proper coping skills because of his rigid upbringing.

Papyrus - The optimist. He stays positive through everything. Everything and everyone can do better, and he sees the best in all situations. But he also has a responsible streak with an urge to organize everything (clean/cook/no desserts before dinner). His relationship with Sans could have very well ended up problematic, with Paps taking on a parental role for his parent early on in his life.

Edge - The pessimist. Edge is the other side of the coin from Papyrus. While his world view is often just as rigid, he is emotional. While it is implied he was always a fussy baby, he’s very sensitive to change, and shows that children are capable of picking up on things that the adults in their lives try to hide. His abandonment issues run deep, and will cause him to lash out until he is older and learns better self control and comes to terms with his father’s death. It is not uncommon for children of single parent homes to become resentful, if not at their present parent, but at the one that is gone. It is difficult for Edge to separate his father’s death, and Red’s fights with Sans, away from himself, and his self-centric view of the world.

Gaster - The (sympathetic?) antagonist. There are points where you love to hate him, and other times, you have to step back. He’s the authoritarian parent that dictated most of his child’s life up until that child literally vanished and became a hermit for a while. It isn’t through callousness or unkindness that he acts this way, but in what he believes is the opposite. He struggles with emotions, especially showing them, an example of how often older generations, especially males, often don’t/can’t/won’t show emotional vulnerability. He wants the best for Sans and those he cares about, even if he often fails to show it properly.

Web - The dead dad. Red’s relationship with Web is complicated. He remembers when Web was a brilliant man, even if not the most fatherly of fathers. But he also laid witness to his fall from grace as well, his drinking habit the most evident. His role is ambiguous much of the story, though he’s left behind hole. His death is the catalyst to a number of the story’s events, and Red’s struggle with him in death is to show the complicated feelings people may have when they lose a loved one who may have not been the best person. Sans’ relationship with him was more to highlight how far he’d actually fallen in the end from where he used to be.

Toriel - The mother. She is a maternal presence in many character’s lives. Her mothering is revealed to be related to her inability to conceive a child. Infertility is a common problem for women. She goes on to foster, babysit and even adopt after Asriel is born. She also an example of the powerful bonds we form with others and how sometimes families are found. Toriel was as much of a mother to Sans as she was Asriel.

The Fallen Humans - The catalyst. If Frisk didn’t exist, there wouldn’t be a story. After all, she was the child that climbed the mountain, starting the events of Undertale. Frisk and Chara both are implied to have troubled pasts, which lead them to being vulnerable to that idea of absolute power corrupts absolutely. The meddle. They are often selfish and don’t consider the consequences of their actions, and when they do, there is a sense of it doesn’t matter. Nothing matters when you can manipulate reality itself. But where Frisk possess a sense of guilt for what happened with Sans, Chara does not, and even outright tells Red that he is willing to do anything to accomplish his goals (even if that means hurting everyone else). Kris is a ‘dreamer’, and while he has more control over tweaking the events that play out, he is far less calloused by RESETS and LOADS. He just wants to be close to his brother Asriel, as well as help his ‘siblings’ find a sense of belonging.

Undyne - The Protagonist’s parallel. A child of divorce, which for monsters often leads to trauma and death, she is left to be raised by Gerson. She’s angry, resentful and prone to get in fights. Red often compares her to Edge, but can also empathise deeply with her troubles. At fourteen she is old enough to understand the reality of the situation, but also young enough to be deeply affected by the changes. Given the rarity of divorce, it is implied that her home life was unstable before the events of the story. Red tries to help her as he never got help himself.

Asriel - The miracle child. Mostly a background character. Asriel’s main connections are to Kris and the Dreemurs. He was the child that a couple struggling with fertility finally conceived. His being born, however, resulted Gaster creating Red for Webdings.

Asgore - The powerful person. Gaster and Toriel both have names that are impactful in the community, but Asgore is the founder of Dreemur Medical and Biotech. He was the King of Monsters. Despite his passive role, he influences many of the character’s choices and actions but simply EXISTING as a person of importance. Gaster tries to literally create viable monster cloning/fertility enhancement methods for him which lead to Sans and Red being born. His inviting Web to work with determination led to the creation of the Machine.

Gerson - The substitute parent. His main role in the story is as a family friend of Undyne’s and in the end, her new parental figure. She resents him and he takes care of her. He cannot replace what she’s lost, but he tries to provide her a future. A hard role to fill in a child’s life.

Grillby - The old friend. Grillby plays are far more subtle part. He’s survived a broken Soulbond, he’s friends with Sans, and through every up-and-down, he’s remained open to Sans when he comes back around. Sometimes as children we form friendships with adults that are just as strong as those we form with our peers. This is true for Sans.

There are a few more characters that show up mostly for color and world building but don’t play a significant part in pushing the themes of the story.

CONCLUSION

Would I do this again? Yes. I am planning on continuing the 100 word trend in the Pre-Sequel This Way Up. It may be truer to the spirit of drabbles since we will have a lot more ground to cover since it will be telling Sans’ history. We’ll get to learn more about Gaster, Webdings, the Dreemurs, Grillby and the Fallen Humans. And for those of you who want to know more about the HwC boys as they are? Moving Day will fill in the blanks. And I also promised a sequel. Bubblewrap Blues will take place significantly in the future and center around a certain aptly named skeleton and the edgy boy that likes to get coffee in his cafe.

I’m pleased with how the story turned out.

I never expected the reaction and the feedback. To those of you who commented and kudosed. Thank you. And to those who quite literally followed me from the start, reading and commenting near every day if not every day? You’re extra amazing. Thank you. Thank you so much.

[momentofmemory]

fictober - day thirty-one

Prompt #31: “Scared, me?”

Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe (Spider-Man/Tom Holland Films, Captain America)

Characters: Peter Parker & Steve Rogers, Michelle Jones (mention)

Words: 2917

Author’s Note: i have been patiently waiting for an opportunity to pair these two all month, and today i happened to see a still from ffh that showed art supplies in peter’s room and just. bam. practically 3k. having also done inktober this month, this serves neatly to combine the two. oh—and this occurs about 4-5 months post endgame.

>>Brooklyn & Queens (don’t throw shade, draw it)

Signing up for Ms. Hart’s Drawing I class is the most singularly idiotic thing Peter’s ever done, and considering he accidentally hitched a ride into space four months ago, that’s saying a lot.

It all started when he found Ben’s old film camera in the storage boxes they’d gotten post-Blip. He’d showed it to MJ—it’s artsy and it’s old, so she was sure to know what to do with it—and she’d looked at him with her usual level of curiosity disguised as ambivalence.

“You know Midtown’s offering a Darkroom Photography class next Fall, right?”

Peter didn’t know that, but once he did it was all he could think about.

He brings it up to his guidance counselor, and while she’s surprised by his interest, she tells him he can fit it into his schedule—but only if he takes the spring semester drawing class to meet the prerequisites.

It’s that fateful decision that leads to him sitting in Yellowstone Park for two hours straight, trying and failing to translate the still life from this morning’s class onto the paper in front of him.

He holds his pencil at arm’s length and tilts it to the side, one eye closed. He’s not entirely sure how that’s supposed to help, but it’s what all the artists in the movies do, so he figures it’s worth a shot.

The image looks just as small and useless as it did before.

(Although to be fair, that might be because it’s a photograph on a 4.7 inch phone screen, and not an actual, full-sized object.)

Peter wishes MJ were here—he’d initially picked the park because MJ said she’d help him figure out lighting, but she’d gotten caught up in some kind of decathlon prep right as they were leaving school. He hasn’t heard a word from her since, so he’s honestly given up on the idea of her coming at this point.

Peter groans and flops back onto the grass, notebook falling onto his chest and arm across his eyes.

“I should have stayed Blipped.”

He’s fully intending on lying there until nature takes over and he’s turned into ant food, when he’s interrupted by an elderly gentleman’s voice.

“You all right there, son?”

“Only questioning my own mortality for want of a stable light source—” Peter halts mid sentence, realizing the voice sounded weirdly familiar.

Peter lowers his arm from his face and finds himself staring into the eyes of none other than Captain Steven G. Rogers himself.

“Holy shi—” Peter nearly punches a hole in the ground with the amount of force he exerts in leaping to his feet. “—shingles. Holy shingles. Sir.”

He only just remembered that one story Mr. Stark used to tell about the language thing, but Captain Rogers just seems amused by his slip up.

“Sorry if I scared you there, Queens.”

There’s a twinkle in his eye that makes Peter wonder if he didn’t do it on purpose, but he feels the need to defend himself either way. “Scared? Me? No no no no, I was just… cold.”

It’s seventy-five degrees in the shade, and Peter’s been sitting directly in the sun since he got here.

He shoves his notebook behind him with his foot and brushes non-existent grass off his jeans. “Um, anyway, what’re you—what’re you doing out here? I mean, not that you need a reason, since it’s a public park and you’re part of the public I guess, I mean you’re like half of the reason the public is even still here, so, uh—”

Cap looks like he’s trying not to laugh, and Peter wishes the ground would swallow him whole if only to get him to stop talking. “—what I mean is that I uh, I didn’t realize you were still hanging around in New York, Captain Rogers. America. Sir.”

He’s not entirely sure what the ex-super soldier’s official designation is these days, but Cap just starts to sit down on the grass, gesturing for Peter to do the same.

“Just Steve is fine,” he says, legs folded cross-legged under him. “Pretty sure Sam’ll kill us both if he hears you referring to anyone but him as Captain America now. He’s pretty taken with the new title.”

“Oh. Yeah.” Peter crosses his own legs and twiddles his thumbs. The politics of legacy heroes must be wild. He makes a note to never let anyone go by Spider-Man except himself.

“So can I… help you?”

Even as Peter asks, he can feel his throat seizing up at the thought. Before Thanos, he’d have given anything to team up with Captain America, but now…

Now, his heart’s accelerating from than just hero worship.

“No, no. Nothing like that.” Steve’s looking at him closely, eyes strangely sharp for the hundred plus year old body they’re staring out of. “Actually, Tony asked me to keep an eye on you.”

Peter looks up in surprise. “Mr. Stark said that?”

“The words he used were a bit stronger, but yes,” Steve says. “Not that he needed to. Even if you’re from a trashy borough like Queens, you’re still a New York boy.”

Peter gasps in horror, tensions forgotten. “You’re literally from Brooklyn! That’s like, infinitely worse!”

“Not according to ExtraSpace.com, which ranks it as the best borough for housing.”

“Whoever taught you how to use the internet should be criminalized, sir.”

“Steve,” he repeats.

“Right. Steve.” The name still feels weighty on Peter’s tongue. “…If I’m Queens, can we make it even and I call you Brooklyn?”

Cap laughs, and Peter barely has time to think oh my god Captain America laughed at one of my jokes before he realizes the man’s nodding towards Peter’s sketchpad. “Tell you what, you can call me Brooklyn so long as you tell me what’s got you longing for death this evening.”

“Uh…” Peter flounders, trying to find a cooler way to say homework. “Just some bottles.”

Not cooler, Peter. Very, very not cooler.

Steve raises his eyebrows.

“By which I mean drawing bottles! Glass, still-life bottles. Totally kosher ones. Not like, alcohol ones.” Peter scrambles for his notebook. “I’m not legal yet.”

To his surprise, though, Steve holds out an open hand. “May I see?”

Peter turns red enough that if he looked in the mirror, he’d probably think he had his costume on. “…Sure?”

Steve takes the notebook from him and starts paging through it, lingering every so often to trace over his lines. Peter watches the other man’s gnarled hand to avoid thinking about the fact that Captain America was looking at his high school level, B graded sketchpad.

What even is his life.

The only benefit from Steve looking at his drawings is that it meant the other man’s eyes weren’t directly on him, and that lends Peter the courage to ask the question that’s been in the back of his mind ever since he first saw Steve’s white hair.

“…Did you really go back?”

Steve’s hand stills over a poorly done rendition of an onion skin. “By go back, I assume you mean ‘stay.’”

Peter’s not sure he hasn’t just walked into a dangerous topic, but he’s never been good at knowing when to stop. “Yeah.”

Steve nods in a way that makes Peter think he’s probably a lot like that, too. “Then yes.”

A young couple walk by a few yards away, but pay them no mind—Peter’s not in his costume, and the general public doesn’t know what happened to Steve. They could easily pass as just an average grandfather and grandson, enjoying a day in the park. Peter’s eyes follow them until he’s sure they’re out of earshot, anyway, then he turns his attention back to Steve.

“So that makes you like…” Peter pauses, quickly running the numbers in his head. “…A hundred and ten? A hundred and eighty if you count the ice?”

The corner of Steve’s mouth twitches up. “Something like that.”

There’s a glint in Steve’s eyes that makes Peter think he might have wildly missed the mark; he stows that tidbit away for later. “Huh. Wow.”

Steve turns another page. “Does your professor know you’re drawing from photographs?”

“Uh, yeah, I guess?” Peter frowns, wondering how Steve could tell. “Does it matter?”

Steve hums, his brow furrowed in thought. “Camera lens aren’t the same as an eye—flattens the shapes differently. It can throw off the lighting, too.”

Peter tilts his head, then looks at his phone, still lying abandoned on the ground. “Oh.”

“Don’t worry.” Steve turns the page. “It’s a disadvantage when drawing, but it’s also the main advantage of actual photography. You can distort the world to fit the message you’re trying to tell.”

“Isn’t that lying?”

“All of art is a lie if you think it’s a direct interpretation of reality, Peter. The truth of art isn’t in always in what it depicts. It’s in how it depicts.”

Even though they’re his own drawings, Peter cranes his neck over Steve’s shoulder to look at his sketchbook. To him, they just look like the average still life. 

He wonders what Steve sees.

“How’d you know so much about art?”

“I was planning on being an art major, before the war,” Steve says. “And then I became one in 1957.”

Peter starts, eyes widening as Steve turns the page and finally reaches the sketches he’d been working on that afternoon. “You…”

He trails off, unsure of how to pursue that without offending the older super. Steve, for his part, says nothing further and just flips back and forth between Peter’s second and fourth failed attempt at the three-bottle composition.

Peter clears his throat. “When you—when you decided to go back. Was it hard?”

“Dr. Mortyn’s decision to grade on the curve was infuriating.”

Peter scowls; frustrated at what he can only assume is Steve being deliberately obtuse. “No, I mean—not being able to… change things.”

If Peter’s honest with himself, he’s both a little confused by and a little jealous of Steve’s decision. Confused, because he can’t imagine walking away from the fight when there’s still so much work to be done, can’t imagine going backwards in time when all he ever wants to do is move forward. But also jealous, because…

Because Peter’s tired, and he’s only been doing this for two years—if he’s tired now, then he can’t imagine how he’ll feel once he’s been doing this for as long as Cap did (if he makes it that long). Because Peter’s watched superheroes fight and die and sacrifice everything, and the memorials he passes in the street make him feel so small and insignificant that when he goes out on patrol, it makes him wonder if anything he’s doing really matters. Because he feels like he’s doing nothing right now but he’s terrified he’s going to be called on to do everything one day, and he’s just not sure he’s enough.

Steve finally reaches the last sketch in the notebook—the one Peter’d been working on before he’d given up on the whole thing. Steve looks at the forms for a long moment, then flips to the back of the book and carefully tears out a blank page.

“Where’s your pencil, Queens?”

“My—” Peter’s not entirely sure Steve isn’t just changing the subject on him, but he scrambles for the writing utensil regardless. He finds it and two more laying a few feet away, and gently blows an ant off the tip of the black one before offering it to Steve.

Steve accepts it, and starts sketching an outline of the composition.

“Your grasp of form is good,” he says, shapes quickly coming to life under his deft fingers. “Your proportions are mostly correct; there’s not too much difficulty on perspective. The composition is already set for you, so that’s no issue.”

He finishes the draft, still unshaded, and hands the sketchpad back to Peter. “So why do you keep redoing the same drawing?”

Peter looks between the sketched lines in Cap’s drawing and his own iterations. “Because they’re not the same?”

“The outlines are. Does the rest matter?”

“Well, yeah. Once you add in the shading…”

Peter flips through all the sketches he’d made today—one, two, five, seven; hundreds of eraser marks on all of them. They’re all wrong, but they’re all wrong just a little differently. One has light sources that seem to defy all the laws of physics, jumping in every which direction. Another has marks that were supposed to be highlights, but wound up being darker than the actual shadows. Still another has values that are so close together the shadows make the image look flatter than even Steve’s quick sketch.

He looks up at Steve. “It makes the final thing totally different.”

Steve smiles in response, and starts filling in his own sketch.

“Local colour is your biggest problem,” he says. “You’re trying to match everything to the colour your eye thinks it’s seeing in the photo—like in this one, where your darkest shadow on the white bottle is still brighter than the lightest highlight on the black bottle.”

“And that’s bad?” Peter frowns, catching his lip between his teeth, and starts his eighth version of the image while Cap continues.

“Not necessarily.” Steve runs the pencil over the edge of one of the bottles, darkening its side. “Shading is always a tricky thing. There’s a lot of things to pay attention to—shadows, highlights, halftones. Local colour. One of the most important rules is making sure your lightest dark is still darker than the darkest light.”

“Is that last one supposed to be a metaphor?”

“It wasn’t intended, but you can certainly take it that way.”

Peter hums in response, and moves on to outlining the second bottle. “So in my drawing, do I just ignore the colour?”

“The original context always matters,” Steve replies. He pauses to point out a discrepancy in one of Peter’s lines before continuing. “Your white bottle is always going to be whiter than the black one overall. But if you’ve got a highlight on both—that highlight’s the same. And if you’ve got a dark shadow on something, don’t be afraid to make it as dark as it needs to be to provide contrast.”

Peter nods, and after a few minutes, finishes his outline and starts shading. Steve offers pointers every so often, and he’s barely a quarter of the way through the first bottle before he can see a marked difference between this sketch and his last one.

“So,” Peter says eventually. “When I asked how you handled not being able to change things…”

Steve pauses, his pencil hovering above the page, and waits for Peter to finish. 

Peter looks down at his drawing and thinks about how it’s exactly the same as all the others, and yet totally different, too.

“…The answer is that you did.”

Steve smiles, the edges of his eyes crinkling, and turns his attention back to his sketch. It’s all the confirmation Peter needs.

The scritch-scratch of pencil on paper fills Peter’s ears as he thinks about that revelation. Whatever Steve did, it can’t have been major—not in the universe-shaping, blatantly obvious kind of way he’s used to Avengers working. He wonders if it was enough.

Peter erases a shadow on the middle bottle he’s decided has gotten too dark, and then glances at Steve, who’s started adding all kinds of textures and details to his own drawing.

It’s clearly the same picture, but the art is something else entirely.

It’s enough.

Peter’s certain Steve has better things to do, but the retired soldier stays with him for another hour, either telling him stories about the Avengers or old school New York, or gently correcting something about his art form. By the time Peter’s done, the sketch isn’t great, per se, but it’s at least good. Steve helps Peter pack his things back up, and then hoists Peter to his feet with a strength that belies his older body.

Steve then hands Peter the drawing he’d made, and Peter almost refuses until he flips it over and sees that Steve’s written a phone number on the back.

“Let me know if you ever need anything, Queens. Including, but not limited to, more art lessons.”

Peter grins from ear to ear. “Thanks, Brooklyn. You too.”

The next morning, Peter turns in a drawing that still looks a little wonky, but it’s so dramatically improved from last time that MJ gives him a halfway impressed thumbs up, and it’s enough to make him take back every disparaging thing he’s said about the class.

That evening, Spider-Man heads out onto the streets with more excitement than he’s had in a long time.

He doesn’t do anything of a particularly groundbreaking nature—nothing that will change the outlines. There’re no aliens, no world-ending weapons, no last minute, jaw dropping rescues.

But there is Mr. Delmar, who needs help repainting the store sign that’s too high for him to reach. There’s a sixth grader, who’s putting up posters for her lost dog until he finds it eleven blocks away. There’s a would-be mugger, who’s had one too many bad days but Spider-Man listens to them all, and then helps him register at a homeless shelter.

It’s nothing so grand as saving the universe. It won’t get him shrines in the streets, or murals on skyscrapers, or even a mention in the paper.

But it’s something: a few more highlights, a little more definition, a bit more right in a world where there’s so much wrong.

And that, Peter decides, is not nothing.

[red-flare-art]

Update

Hey guys! It’s been a while since I really posted anything on here regularly, & I felt like I should explain my situation & what I’ve been up to the past few months.

I’ll put it under a cut, cuz it might get long.

For starters, I’ve been trying to get a job all year. Actually, I’ve been trying to get a very specific job, which is at my local post office, & I have been in the hiring process ALL. YEAR. I applied in January/February after having worked at the post office for the holiday season. I liked the job & the people there liked me & said I should apply for a full time position, so I did. But the hiring process takes FOREVER, cuz you gotta take a test & go to an interview thing & get a background check & get your fingerprints taken & your driving record checked & ALL that good stuff, & in between each of these steps is a LOT of WAITING. So you could go to the interview, get accepted, then not hear anything for WEEKS before the next step in the process. Then after that step it’s ANOTHER few weeks before you hear anything, & so on & so on. (This is what happens when you apply to a government job.) So I’ve FINALLY gotten all my paperwork & processing done, but I still need to go through orientation & training, which starts next week. I’m REALLY hoping everything goes smoothly cuz this has been such an ordeal, & I almost gave up on getting the job multiple times. 

Another thing I’ve been preparing for this year is Wasteland Weekend, which if you’ve never heard of it, is a post-apocalyptic themed camping trip/party in the California desert. I’m going with my good friends @bluedenimdress & @nuclearmu5hroom, who I went with on my Boston trip in 2017. It’s FINALLY coming up at the end of this month, but for a while, I was really unsure if it was gonna work out, due to the whole post office job thing mentioned above. I wasn’t sure if the time tables were gonna overlap, but luckily, I was able to work it out with the post office, & the trip is still on! Now I’m just frantically trying to make sure we have what we need for the trip, since it’s gonna be 5 days in the middle of the hot desert with limited outside resources.

Some other stuff worth mentioning is we’ve been having a lot of renovations at the house, including AC installation, new water heater, & new shingles. (And while the roofers were ripping out the old shingles, one of them fell through the ceiling in my room. No joke. So that was another repair added to the list.) So there was a long period where I just had to stay home to keep an eye on the workers or answer any questions they might have while my friend/housemate was at work. & they were always there early in the morning making a lot of noise, so I missed out on some sleep.

I also haven’t really had much inspiration or motivation to draw lately. I’m always good about doing commissions, cuz I’m given a clear prompt, but as far as drawing for fun or for myself goes, I just...haven’t felt it. :( It’s probably just cuz I’ve had a lot on my mind with this job & the home repairs & Wasteland Weekend, but the creative part of my brain feels...dormant. I just need something to wake it up again.

Anyway, that’s pretty much what’s been going on with me the past few months. Sorry I’ve been so quiet & inactive. I feel so distanced from everyone I used to talk to on here, & it’s entirely my own fault. :( But once this month is over & I go on my trip & start my new job, then maybe I can finally just...chill, lol.

Btw, inktober is coming up & I have no idea what theme I should go with this year, so if you guys have any ideas or suggestions, throw them in my ask box. Also I’m still accepting commissions, so feel free to email me at redflare3@gmail.com.

Thanks for taking the time to read this, if you did! :)

[puffbts]

Pumpkin pie

(Inktober day 29)

Pairing: Logicality

*

Patton glanced at Logan and let his lips curl into a smile.

They were baking together, and Patton was really appreciating it, even though he wouldn’t dare say it to Logan. They’d known each other for years and he was well placed to know that the astronomy student was not one for emotions. It wasn’t always good for Patton’s heart but he wanted to respect it with all his might.

The nurse student focused on making the filling for the pie again, letting Logan make little waves in the crust. He loved staring at him while he was focus, even though it wasn’t a rare sight, because these were the only moments he could watch every detail in his face and body without being noticed – or at least he thought so.

Up until now, Logan had been making the crust and Patton had carved a pumpkin – he believed everything tasted better when you made it yourself. All of this was done in silence, with no music on, and it took a lot for Patton to keep himself from talking but he wanted to make his best friend feel at ease. Both knew their tasks, as they had agreed on them before starting, hence no questions were needed.

Logan broke the silence by standing up, noisily pushing back his chair against the hard, wooden floor. He placed the finished crust in the fridge to chill as the recipe suggested and went to stand next to Patton.

“Is there anything I can do to help you?” he asked, pushing his glasses up his nose.

Patton unconsciously imitated him as he thought about it, taken aback by the change of “plans”. Patton was supposed to work on the filling, not Logan, so he was surprised he’d ask.

“Well, you could clean up what you used. Or prepare the pumpkin puree, since we’ll clean up everything later anyway. But I thought I was the one who’d do that.”

“So did I, but I seem to have misjudged the time you’d need and finished before you. The least I can do is help you so that it’ll be finished in time.”

Patton looked away so that Logan wouldn’t notice the blush on his cheeks. If he knew why Patton had been so slow, Logan would certainly never want to see him again. Or worse, he’d never want to bake with him again.

“Do what you want, it’s not like we have a time limit anyway. Unless you-”

“No, you’re right, we don’t.” Logan seemed to smile as he took the pumpkin and cream to his place and started working on it after he read the instructions.

Patton felt something warm spread through his chest and belly and continued mixing the ingredients for the filling.

After a few minutes, Logan took the plate out of the fridge and Patton poured the filling in the crust. Logan placed the pie inside the oven and set the timer.

“So, now we wait fifteen minutes and then we’ll lower the temperature, right? Shall we get started on the washing-up until then?” He asked as he stood up.

Patton smiled and turned towards the table, covered in dirty dishes.

“Yeah, let’s do that.” He sighed.

Logan filled the sink with hot water and soap as Patton brought all the dishes to the counter beside it. One could think, when seeing each at their post, that they’d been baking together for years. It was actually only the third time, because Patton couldn’t tell if Logan liked it and the latter had never expressed it. The only thing Patton knew for sure was that Logan was really good at it.

For fifteen minutes, Logan washed the dishes and Patton dried them, until the alarm rang and Patton changed the temperature of the oven, protecting the crust with baking paper.

Patton couldn’t help but think, as he took back his towel, that they’d been quieter than usual. Once he stood next to Logan again, the astronomy student splashed him with water.

“Hey!” Patton yelped, looking down at his now wet polo. “You could have burnt me!”

“Of course not, I know how hot this is, I’ve had my hands in the water for fifteen minutes. You’re awfully quiet, are you okay?”

Patton fumbled with a spatula, taken aback by the worried tone in his friend’s voice.

“You’re also quiet, yet that doesn’t bother me.”

Logan pulled his hands out of the sink. “You aren’t normally this quiet, which leaves me to think that you have something on your mind. Why don’t you tell me?”

“I don’t want to bother you.” Patton mumbled as he set down his towel.

Logan frowned and splashed him again, this time in the face.

“No! It got on my glasses!” Patton exclaimed, taking them off to dry them.

Before he could do so, however, he felt a hand under his chin and lips on his. He didn’t have time to register what happened before he saw a blurred image of Logan in front of him. He hurriedly wiped his glasses and put them back on his nose.

“What- Lo… why did you do that?”

“Emotions can be too overwhelming for words sometimes. I’ve been feeling a lot of mixed ones lately and I think you have too. I had to try but if-”

Patton didn’t let him finish as he jumped on him, kissing him with all his might. He felt Logan smile against his lips and, for forty minutes, forgot that there was a pie in the oven.

***

[alarawriting]

Inktober #20: Tread

Two people have done fan art for this character; I will reblog them after posting this, with a tag to make them findable, since Tumblr hides posts with links from search.

Five friends drove up the mountain into the forest, where the vacation cabin waited for them. It was their senior year of college, so it wouldn’t be long before they’d be graduating and going their separate ways, and who knew when they’d all be able to hang out together again? So they’d decided that this year, instead of going on spring break someplace where there were a ton of other people, they’d spend break together in a cabin in the woods, because there was no possible way that that could go wrong.

They were just five totally ordinary college guys. Steve, a white dude with brown hair who loved video games and playing guitar; Trevor, a black dude with short hair who was on track to graduate magna cum laude and had already been accepted at a top medical school; Harrison, an outgoing, short, red-haired white dude who played soccer, but not, like, at career athlete level or anything; Evan, an Asian dude who kept his hair in a long ponytail, and whose family owned the cabin, who was planning on taking a year off after graduation to backpack around Asia and had sold it to his parents as an exploration of his heritage; and the Pale Bro, a twelve-foot tall dude with paper-white skin whose fingernails were like long razor blades and who was completely covered with eyes and mouths, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, cut-off shorts that would have been nearly pants on any other guy, and a pair of Vans on his feet. Just five ordinary young fellows, like anyone you might know.

Steve was driving the minivan, kinda wishing it was his dad’s SUV because of the effort of getting a minivan up the slope, but his dad’s SUV was in a different state and besides, it wouldn’t have had room for the Pale Bro. The minivan was the kind where you could put down the back row of seats to expand the cargo capacity, and the Pale Bro had laid out a thick sleeping-bag style blanket on top of their suitcases and was laying on them now, curled sideways because there was no dimension where he could stretch out in the van. Must be rough for him, Steve imagined, always having to bend down or curl up to fit into buildings and vehicles with his bros. He never complained about it, though. He was a great friend.

“How much farther is this place?” Harrison asked. “I gotta piss like you wouldn’t believe.”

“I’ve been unfortunately next to you at the urinals,” Trevor said. “I’d believe it.”

Steve checked the GPS. “Shit. The GPS has just decided to get the vapors because it’s up too high. It’s telling me I’m literally in the middle of nowhere. Like, look at this.” He showed the screen to Evan. “We’re in the middle of nowhere. It isn’t even drawing the road.”

“Don’t worry about it, I can guide you in from here,” Evan said. “Just stay on the road another 20 minutes or so.”

With a voice that rumbled like the sound of tectonic plates grinding together and the hiss of static from the birth of the universe behind it, the Pale Bro conveyed that there had better be some fucking food at the cabin, because he was starving.

“You and me both, buddy,” Trevor said.

“We all just got Burger King like, two hours ago,” Steve complained.

“Yeah, well, me and Pale are tall dudes. We need more food than you.” The smirk on Trevor’s face indicated that he didn’t really believe that.

“There should be food, I had a grocery delivery scheduled for yesterday and one of my parents’ employees was supposed to swing by the place, pick it up and put it in the fridge.”

“There’s a fridge at this cabin?” Harrison asked.

Evan looked at him. “Yeah, dumbass, you think I’d have suggested coming here if there was no fridge? There’s running water, too. It even gets hot if you run it long enough.”

“Well, excuse me for not being so rich I can afford to go to a cabin in the woods, ever, before now.”

“What else has it got?” Trevor asked.

“Well, there’s three bedrooms, one of which has a king-sized bed and the other two have bunk beds. I figure, Pale Bro gets the big bed and we break up into two’s and do the roommate thing. We don’t have a washer or dryer, but if you only brought one pair of underpants and it’s getting really rank, we’ve got detergent and a clothesline so you can wash them in the sink. There’s a dishwasher.”

“I would have put in a washer and dryer before I put in a dishwasher, personally,” Steve said.

“Yeah, well, my mom had a different opinion. Anyway, it’s camping in the woods. It’s not supposed to be just like if we were at home.”

“I call top bunk!” Harrison said.

“There’s two top bunks. Both rooms have bunk beds.”

The Pale Bro expressed in a voice like a Gregorian chant of nightmares that he wanted to know if there was a bathroom in the master bedroom, because that shit would be sweet.

“Naah, man, sorry,” Evan said. “But there is one of those really deep claw-foot bathtubs that you like.”

Like the rumbling of an oncoming avalanche, the Pale Bro opined that that was excellent.

***

“I don’t believe this shit.”

They had just disembarked, the Pale Bro in the rear bringing his own suitcase and the beer cooler, which was the size of a mini-fridge, and everyone else dragging their suitcases in… except for Evan, who had gone directly to the kitchen without bringing in his own stuff yet. He came stomping out. “Joe never showed up, the bastard! I’m totally having my dad fire his ass.”

“What do you mean?” Steve asked.

“I mean that food order never showed up. So we have canned food, and boxed food, but we don’t have anything perishable. No bread, no lunchmeat, no eggs, no bacon, no orange juice, none of that shit.” He sighed. “I’m gonna have to drive down into town myself to get food, and we just got here.”

“Hey, man, I can still drive the car,” Steve said. “You just need to tell me where to go.”

“Steve, you’ve been driving for 6 hours, you’re probably wiped. I can drive,” Trevor said. “It’s the least I could do with Evan buying our food.”

“Yeah, but you bought the beer, man,” Evan said. “So maybe Harrison needs to drive.”

“Uh, hey, before anyone drives anywhere, maybe you should call and find out if your parents even know where that Joe guy who never showed up is, and if he’s all right?” Harrison called from outside.

“Why?”

“Just… everyone come take a look at this!”

Everyone went outside and congregated around Harrison’s find, which was a roughly humanoid, but clawed, tread that was at least three times the size of a normal footprint. Experimentally the Pale Bro put his own massive foot into the tread. Harrison whistled. The footprint was about 25% bigger than the Pale Bro’s.

“Dude. What is that? Is that a bear?” Harrison asked.

Trevor shook his head. “Those are sneaker treads, Har. Bears don’t wear sneakers.”

In a voice that was the perfect auditory personification of the Zalgo font, the Pale Bro suggested that it looked like one of his cousins was back on its bullshit again.

“Goddamn,” Evan said. “That’s a big fellow.”

“I think maybe if we go into town we should all go,” Steve said.

“We’ve just been driving all this time, though,” Evan said. “I wanted to relax, crack a cold one, put on some MP3s. We don’t get Internet worth shit out here but I’ve got a huge music library on the stereo’s hard drive.”

The Pale Bro opined that before anyone drove anywhere, maybe he had better find his cousin and make it clear that if his cousin touched any of his friends he would shove its head so far up its ass it would be blinking shit out of its 27 eyes for a month.

“That… sounds reasonable,” Trevor said. “Since we don’t know what happened to Joe. We can hunker down here and wait for you to get back.”

“I’m pretty sure I got instant just add water pancake mix,” Evan said. “And my mom stocked this place with crappy dehydrated chicken pieces like the kind doomsday preppers buy. I could make a shitty chicken soup, we’ve got bouillon and noodles. Oh, and there’s a few cans of chili. Canned stuff is shit but I could maybe perk it up with some spices, some extra beans… put some rice in the cooker, I bet my mom left rice here, she buys like 100 pound bags of rice.”

Like the sound of Jupiter hovering in orbit above, rotating ponderously, the Pale Bro agreed that some canned chili with extra spices sounded pretty good considering how fucking hungry he was, and as soon as he found his asshole cousin he’d be back to eat with the rest of his bros. He also reminded them to save him some beer.

“Dude!” Steve laughed. “We’ve got three keggers’ worth in that cooler! There will be plenty of beer for you.”

Evan called his parents as the Pale Bro left the house, and reported back, somewhat gray-faced. “They said Joe never called in to say he got to the house. He reported picking up the groceries, he was headed up here, and then nada.”

“Oh, well, then, you work on the chili,” Trevor said, “and me and the rest of the guys are gonna lock up all the windows and doors and put someone on watch for when the Pale Bro gets back. You don’t have any guns up here, by any chance, do you?”

“Nope, my parents aren’t really hunters,” Evan said.

“Well, I’ve seen your kitchen at home, I know what kind of equipment your mom likes to stock. We’ll have plenty of sharp knives, I’m betting.”

“Yeah.”

And so as Evan attempted to turn six cans of canned chili into something his bros would find edible, and the Pale Bro stalked through the forest on the mountaintop looking for his asshole cousin, the other three made sure everything was locked up, that the car keys were secure, and that there were wicked cooking knives within easy reach, but not line of sight from the outside, of every door. Just like ordinary bros do, every day.

[sarenhale]

Hey guys! A couple of days ago I saw that there was a bit of a controversy under an illustrator I follow on Instagram, about one of their Inktober pieces. 

I wanted to hear your opinion on the matter, because I’m torn myself on how to feel about this. 

The artist posted a drawing of a woman cutting her wrists for Inktober, the drawing itself wasn’t TOO graphic or gore, but you could clearly see the multiple cuts on her flesh, some blood and the knife she was holding in her hand. 

The drawing caused a lot of controversy between the people following the artist (who has a large following), and many asked them to put a trigger warning before the actual piece, to write a small disclaimer in the description or even to take down the drawing entirely. 

Most people were complaining that the subject of the drawing and the way it was presented was too graphic and could trigger  bad memories / trauma for a lot of people, and even encourage self harm for some that are in a dark place. (Since the artist has a large following). 

The artist didn’t put any trigger warning/ change the post, and after some hours, it got deleted by Instagram because too many people reported it. 

The artist complained on their instagram stories and made a post on their profile saying its’ not their responsability how people react to their art, and they don’t want to censor their art just because people might have strong feeling about something they drew. They are basically tired of people on instagram complaining about what they post and putting their feelings and lifes over the artists’ art, because it’s ‘just art’ (artist’s words) and it shouldn’t be taken personally by everyone.

Now, what do you think about this, about the way the artist reacted and denied any responsability? 

I’m torn myself, I think as an artist posting your art publicly, you have a certain amount of responsability over what you draw and how you present it. 

I also think the topic the artist wanted to represent (blood witch) could have been handled and displayed in a much less graphic way, just simply removing the cuts from the wrists and having the blood magically come out the flesh or float around her wouldn’t have been that graphic and triggering. (and it’s an easy fix)

I also understand, however, how the artists wanted to display the theme in a personal way by displaying the bruteness and harshness of the act.

However, I think that since they planned to post it as an inktober entry publicly, they might have wanted to reserve their personal intepretation for a personal, privat piece, and go with a less graphic theme for a public post that would involve a lot of engagement. 

I also don’t think it would have been that difficult to edit the post with a trigger warning and put a disclaimer image before the actual entry, so people would have been warned before viewing. I can’t honestly excuse this for the artist, because I think that editing the post and adding a trigger warning and disclaimer is very easy, as much as saying ‘sorry guys! I edited the post’ to everyone that felt triggered by the image.

I can understand how the artist felt censored, but not how they didn’t even wanted to try editing the post or posting a small text to explain their thoughts, even after the picture was reported, like: ‘Sorry for the incovenience, I noticed my post got a lot of people hurt, so I reposted the drawing with some edits to make it less graphic. I wasn’t in any way trying to encourage self harm or violence’.

Was that hard? I’m not reacting this way about the drawing per se, I think we all deserve the freedom to draw what we want, but we DO have to take responsability for what we draw and HOW we present it publicly to people, and act accordingly. 

Maybe I do want to draw something that represents domestic violence (as an example), but since it’s an hard theme, I will be extra careful about the way I present it publicly. I think some artists and people forget that our art exists to be perceived and interpreted by a public of people. 

What is YOUR opinion on this? I’d like to know what you guys think, as artists or as public viewers of art, about what happened. 

Please, keep the conversation civil and mature. 

( I won’t be dropping the artist’s name because there’s no point in doing it, since the drawing itself got deleted. )