#i want to keep reworking my thinking......
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HISTORY IN THE MAKING - nerd!NR
pairing- nerd!natasha romanoff x reader
cw- 18+!!; top!reader, gp!bottom!natasha, handjob (n rcv), blowie (n rcv), missionary, praise kink, breeding kink, unprotected sex, creampie? muaha... shy daddy!nat UGHH, kind of orgasm control & slight edging if you squint
wc- 5.4k
a/n- drabble turned fic as i worked my way through these exact history shenanigans a few days back... in the same INTIMATE STUDIES universe! might make this a cute lil thing :) this is very much NOT my best work, i might rework it a little bit just to make it flow a lil more! apologies if there are any repetitions, i tried to catch them, but my brain is fried :/
synopsis- natasha's helping you study russia's history, and the rest is history?? idk it's too late rn guys i'm going to sleep
taglist- @lost-mortemanghel ♥︎, @idkwhatever580, @elliecoochieeater, @left-and-right-up-and-down, @deadlesbianwitches, @lizziewitchy ❀, @simpforlizzie, @riyaexee
You’re sitting cross-legged on Natasha’s bed, staring down at a jumble of Russian history notes that you’re certain might as well be in Cyrillic themselves. The words swim on the page, stubbornly refusing to click in the way chemistry formulas or physics equations do. You press the back of your pen to your lips, glancing over at the figure hunched over the desk in the corner of the room.
Natasha is fully engrossed in her game, brows furrowed in concentration as her fingers fly across the keyboard. The light from her monitor casts a soft glow on her face, highlighting the curve of her cheek and the gentle bite of her lower lip. She’s wearing a simple white blouse tucked into a plaid skirt, her usual attempt to dress professionally for class long since abandoned in favour of cosy socks and a messy bun.
You can’t help but smile a little. The contrast between Natasha’s outward shyness and the intensity in her focus has always been something you found endearing. You met in the class you were currently trying to study for, back when you’d shown up late to Russian history, fumbling through an awkward introduction as the professor sighed and directed you to sit in the last free seat beside her. It had taken a few study sessions for you to get past her initial stammering, but now, you could ask her about anything and her eyes would light up, eagerly launching into whatever story or fact you were struggling to understand. But right now, that focus is directed entirely on her computer screen.
You clear your throat. “Natasha?”
“Hm?” She barely looks up, eyes quickly darting back to her screen.
“Nat,” you repeat, with a hint of a smile. “I need help with the comparison of Russia until 1917 and the West-European’s Ancien Régime. And… pretty much all the details, too.”
She gives a little sigh, half-distracted. “Mm. Yes, the parables are… very interesting, baby. Give me one second. I’m doing really well.”
You hold back a laugh. “Right, but I’m failing Russian history. Melina and Alexei will both kill me. So can you take a break?”
Her eyes don’t leave the screen. “I will, I promise. Just a few more minutes. I’m close to beating this level.”
You can’t help but roll your eyes at her single-minded dedication. Her stubborn innocence, the way she always seems to be pulled between her gentle nature and her intense focus, has you mesmerised. But she can’t honestly think you’re going to wait forever.
“Natasha,” you say softly, standing and crossing over to her desk. Her gaze flicks up to you on her side, her big, doe-like eyes widening with an almost bashful look as you lean against the desk. “You’re seriously not going to help me?”
She blushes, biting her lip. “I really want to help,” she whispers, almost apologetic, “but, really, just a little longer? Please?”
There’s something about the sweet innocence of her pleading that has your heart racing. Her earnestness always has a way of drawing you in, those wide, round eyes like they’re begging for permission to keep playing, and her lips slightly parted in concentration. You tilt your head, taking in every detail of her—the slight blush dusting her cheeks, the faint glimmer of anticipation in her eyes, and the way her fingers clutch the keyboard just a little tighter, like she’s holding onto the game but secretly hoping you’ll take control.
You smile softly and reach for her chair, turning it around so she’s facing you. Her hands hover in the air, a brief look of panic on her face as she loses her place in the game. She opens her mouth to protest, but before she can say anything, you’re sliding onto her lap, straddling her, feeling the warmth of her strong thighs under you.
“Wait! You made me fall off the map!” Natasha squeaks, her voice a mixture of exasperation and a hint of excitement. Her hands instinctively find your hips, holding you as if she’s afraid you might slip away.
You give her a gentle smile, leaning in so that your faces are mere inches apart. “I thought you were going to help me study,” you murmur, your voice dropping to a soft, coaxing tone. You press your hands to her shoulders, letting your fingers trail along her collarbone, feeling the way her heartbeat quickens under your touch.
“I… I was,” she stammers, her cheeks flushing a deep pink, and you catch the slight tremble in her voice. “I just… my game.”
You tilt her chin up, making her meet your gaze, and she blushes even deeper, her fingers tightening their grip on your hips as her eyes grow wide, almost vulnerable. “Natty,” you say, your voice laced with playful patience, “I really need you to focus on me now. History, please.”
Her mouth opens slightly, as though she wants to argue, but all that comes out is a breathy whisper. “Okay.”
You hold Natasha’s gaze, the intensity in her eyes gradually overpowering her initial shyness. Her fingers rest on your hips, hesitant and yet possessive, as though she’s still trying to find some control in this position. Her breath catches each time you shift even slightly, and you can feel her heartbeat racing beneath your touch, each little change in her demeanour making her even more endearing.
You run your thumb along her jawline, feeling the delicate skin beneath, and she lets out a soft breath, her lips parting as she unconsciously leans into your touch. Her eyes flicker from yours to your lips, as if she’s desperately waiting for some kind of signal, a sign that she’s allowed to give in completely.
“Natasha,” you murmur, bringing your face close enough to feel her breath mingling with yours, “what are the key similarities, and how do the t<o regimes differ?”
She hums, her cheeks a soft shade of pink, but words seem to fail her. The hand on your hip trembles slightly, as though she wants to pull you closer but doesn’t dare to, not without permission. You feel the tension building, a mix of her nervousness and desire, and it only makes you want to pull her in even more.
Finally, you press a feather-light kiss to her cheek, just next to her ear, and whisper, “Come on, Natty. Think, please. Need your pretty self to explain it to me.”
She shivers under your touch, swallowing as she tries to remember the words. “Um… right, the… they didn’t have religious freedom,” she stammers, her voice barely above a whisper. The fingers on your hip dig in just slightly, a mix of nerves and need as she fights to keep her focus. “Orthodoxy– uh, there were lots of violent riots… against Muslims, but mostly Jews. Those were called pogroms and… oh…”
Her wordds trail off as you tilt her chin slightly, pressing another soft kiss to the corner of her mouth. Her blush deepens, and you feel the way her body responds, her tension giving way to a faint tremor as she tries to keep talking.
“You’re so good at this,” you whisper, guiding her with gentle encouragement. “But I’m going to need a little more focus from you if we’re going to get through all this history.”
Her breath catches, and she nods, biting her lip as she tries to concentrate. “I can focus,” she whispers, more to herself than to you, as though she’s trying to convince herself as much as you. Her gaze stays locked onto yours, her wide eyes full of innocence mixed with a yearning she can’t quite hide.
Her fingers finally slide up your sides, settling on the dip of your waist with a delicate grip, as though she’s terrified of doing too much, yet completely unwilling to let go. You smile softly, placing a hand over hers, squeezing in silent encouragement, and her blush deepens, her eyes darting away for just a second.
But you don’t let her break eye contact for long. Tilting her chin back to you, you brush your lips over hers in a kiss so soft it’s barely there, and she lets out a faint sigh, melting into the touch. Her grip tightens again, and you feel her breath hitch as you deepen the kiss just slightly, enough to make her toes curl beneath her chair.
“Tell me more,” you murmur, pausing just inches from her mouth, close enough that she can feel the heat radiating between you. “About the razzias. I want to hear you explain it.”
Her lips part, her mind clearly racing to catch up, but she manages a shaky breath. “They just were um, a…,” she stammers, her voice a mix of strained focus and barely-restrained excitement. Her hands start to relax, as though she’s finding confidence in your guidance. “They… uh– it’s a reckoning against religious ideals.”
“Mm-hmm,” you hum in approval, your thumb tracing gentle circles on her cheek. “And then the revolution happened?”
Her eyes flicker down to your lips, and she swallows, her voice barely more than a whisper. “There were two revolutions, technically. First, the February Revolution, and then the radicalised October Revolution.”
Her words start to blur into soft breaths as you lean closer, the warmth of her skin against yours heightening with each delicate touch. You feel her legs shift under you, and a soft gasp escapes her when you shift your weight in her lap, pressing yourself against her in a way that’s both innocent and electric. Her lashes flutter, and her eyes grow hazy, the careful focus she was trying to hold onto slipping with each passing second.
“Good girl,” you murmur, your voice soft and affectionate. Her lips part in a faint, breathless smile, and you feel her chest rise as she takes in a shaky breath, her grip on you tightening just a little more.
You tilt her head back, keeping her gaze locked on yours, letting your fingers trail down her throat, feeling the rapid thrum of her pulse beneath your touch. Her eyes widen, a mixture of awe and anticipation in them as she watches your every move, her hands moving under your sweater like she’s trying to ground herself.
“Do you want to keep going?” you ask softly, running a finger along her jawline, watching the way her breath catches in response.
She nods, unable to find words, her cheeks flushed a deep pink. Her eyes hold that same innocent, almost pleading look, as though she’s begging you to take control, to guide her wherever you want.
You smile, letting your hand drift down from her jaw, fingers grazing along her collarbone, before you slowly trail down to her chest and stomach, where you can feel the rise and fall of her shallow breaths.
“Okay, baby,” you murmur, your words soothing yet commanding as you press a gentle kiss to her neck, feeling the way her pulse quickens under your lips. She shivers, a barely audible whimper escaping her lips, her wide eyes softening as she watches you, her gaze full of innocent trust.
“Natasha,” you whisper, drawing out her name like a gentle caress, “let me help you focus.” Her breath catches, and she gives a shaky nod, her hands tightening their grip on the chair. You slowly lower yourself from her lap, letting your hands slide down the smooth skin of her thighs, feeling the way her body tenses under your touch only to relax as you continue, inching her knees apart.
Her blush deepens, and you can feel her shyness mingling with anticipation as her skirt rides up, revealing the growing hardness pressing against the fabric of her boxers. You let your fingers trace along her inner thigh, watching the way she trembles slightly at each delicate touch. Her wide eyes remain fixed on yours, that blend of vulnerability and desire making your own heart race as you take her in.
“Relax for me,” you murmur, running your hands gently along her thighs. You reach up to brush your fingers over the fabric straining to hold her in, and her lips part in a soft, involuntary moan, her cheeks flushing even deeper as she squirms in her seat.
With slow, deliberate movements, you slide her underwear down, watching the way her member springs free, her blush turning crimson as she looks away for a moment, a mixture of nervousness and excitement flickering across her face. You press a gentle kiss along her inner thigh, easing her legs further apart and taking in her reactions, savouring each shiver, each small gasp that escapes her lips. When you move your mouth closer to her length, you look up at her, waiting until her gaze meets yours.
Once it does, you bring your mouth to her, pressing a feather-light kiss along her shaft, and her reaction is instant—her hips jerk slightly, and she lets out a trembling breath, her fingers clutching the arms of her chair as she tries to stay still. Her breath hitches with every movement, her wide eyes looking down at you, filled with both awe and that same sweet shyness that makes her all the more endearing.
Slowly, you take her into your mouth, your tongue gliding over her, humming at the way she gasps, her fingers gripping the chair so tightly her knuckles turn white. You can feel her body tense under your touch, the warmth of her length in your mouth, and the way she squirms with each gentle movement. Her breathing becomes ragged, her cheeks flushed as her lashes flutter, struggling to keep eye contact.
“Just relax, Natty,” you murmur between gentle caresses, pausing only to offer soft words of encouragement, letting her feel the warmth of your breath against her sensitive skin. “You’re doing so well.”
Her eyes soften further at your words, her lips parted in a soft, breathless smile as she gives a faint nod, her entire body melting under your touch. She lets out a quiet, shaky moan as you continue, her hips shifting involuntarily, her breath hitching each time your mouth moves a little deeper. The look in her eyes—vulnerable yet trusting—only fuels your desire to take her further.
You increase your pace just slightly, watching the way her eyes grow hazier with each passing second, her fingers now reaching out, finding your shoulder as if she needs something to hold onto. The desperation in her gaze, the slight whimpers that escape her lips, all signal how close she’s getting. You pause, pulling back just enough to look up at her, watching the way she struggles to catch her breath.
“You’re so good, Natasha,” you murmur, words muffled by her heat in you, enjoying the way she shivers under the praise. “But don’t let go just yet. I want to take my time with you.”
Her blush deepens at the command, and she nods, swallowing hard as she holds back, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she tries to control herself. You press a soft kiss to her length, smiling at the way she bites her lip, her fingers still clutching your shoulder as she gives herself over to your touch.
With her breaths growing more ragged, you let your hand slide down her thigh, resting at the base of her length as you ease back, switching from the warmth of your mouth to the gentle grip of your hand. Natasha whimpers softly, her lashes fluttering as she watches you with that wide-eyed, innocent gaze. Her hands grip the arms of her chair for stability, her cheeks flushed and lips parted as you begin to stroke her slowly, savouring each reaction.
“Does that feel good, Natty?” you murmur, watching the way her eyes flutter closed for a moment as she nods, her entire body leaning toward your touch.
“Yes,” she breathes, her voice barely above a whisper, laced with a need she’s struggling to hold back. You watch the way her chest rises and falls, each shuddering breath making her more vulnerable, more open to your every move.
You increase the pressure slightly, your hand moving in a slow, deliberate rhythm that has her toes curling, her wide eyes looking down at you with unguarded adoration. You can see how close she is, her face a mix of tension and awe as she clutches at her chair, her mouth falling open in a soft gasp when you switch back to your mouth, taking her in once again.
“Please,” she whispers, her voice trembling, barely audible. She shifts in her seat, her grip tightening as she fights to stay composed, though the desperation in her voice betrays her.
“You want more?” you murmur, pulling back just enough to look up at her, letting your breath ghost over her sensitive skin. She nods frantically, her gaze pleading, as though she’s ready to beg for you to keep going. Her vulnerability makes your heart race, and you lean back in, pressing soft, lingering kisses along her length before taking her in your hand again.
Each change between your mouth and hand drives her closer to that edge, her quiet, broken moans growing more frequent as her body responds to your every touch. You take your time, alternating between gentle strokes and teasing kisses, watching the way her resolve unravels completely. Her hips move instinctively, seeking more, her breath shallow and desperate.
Finally, you slow your pace, watching the way she shudders in response, her gaze hazy and her body fully at peace yet trembling in your hands. “I told you, Natty,” you whisper, pausing to press a kiss to her thigh, “I’m taking my time with you.”
She lets out a shaky exhale, her hands falling from the chair to clutch at your shoulders, her breathing still erratic as she tries to hold herself back. But you can see the way she’s teetering on that edge, fully surrendered to you.
As you continue to alternate between using your hand and mouth, her wide, vulnerable gaze grows more unfocused, her lips parting as her body instinctively responds to you. But just when you think she’s letting herself fall into your pace, you feel her fingers tangle in your hair, firm but trembling, gently pressing down, silently urging you to take her deeper.
The sudden assertiveness surprises you, but you comply, letting her guide you, feeling the way her grip tightens slightly, the desperation in her touch almost pleading. Her quiet whimpers grow louder, echoing in the room as she watches you, her gaze dark with fascination, completely enraptured by the sight of you surrendering to her need.
“Oh, please…” she murmurs, her voice a breathy whisper, barely containing herself. You feel her body shiver as you take her deeper, her soft gasp filling the air. Her eyes, usually so innocent and shy, are now dark with awe, wide and almost worshipful, as though she can barely believe what she’s seeing. She bites her lip, her face flushed, her expression somewhere between a plea and an apology, completely mesmerised by the sight of you.
Finally, feeling your control slip in her grasp, you tap her thigh, and she releases her grip on your hair immediately, looking down at you with that same innocent gaze, as if wondering if she’s overstepped. Her cheeks are flushed, her gaze shy once again, as she watches you with bated breath, clearly unsure of your next move.
Standing up slowly, you meet her gaze, your eyes smouldering as you reach down and slip off your underwear, letting the fabric fall to the floor before stepping out of it. Natasha’s eyes widen, her cheeks a deeper pink as her gaze travels from your face down the length of your body, lingering on the hem of your sweater as if transfixed by the contrast.
Before she can fully take in the sight, you reach for her, your fingers tangling in her hair as you tug her up from the chair, her body following your movements without hesitation. She gasps softly, her breath catching as she’s pulled to her feet, her wide, adoring eyes flicking up to meet yours.
“Strip for me,” you command, your voice low, leaving no room for argument. You release her hair, your touch lingering for just a second as you make your way to her bed, settling yourself atop her scattered history notes, the crinkling of the papers the only sound breaking the silence. She watches, her blush deepening, clearly entranced by the sight of you lying there, completely at ease and in control. Her hands go to the hem of her skirt, her fingers trembling slightly as she begins to undress, her gaze never leaving yours.
Natasha’s fingers tremble slightly as she slides off her skirt, letting it fall to the floor. Her shirt soon follows, revealing the flushed skin of her chest and the slight rise and fall of her breath as she finally stands in front of you, completely exposed and vulnerable. Her eyes flicker between your gaze and your body sprawled out over her history notes, her cheeks flushed with both shyness and desire. You stretch out comfortably, your sweater rucked up just enough to tease her, watching her with that same confident, hungry look that’s left her at your mercy all evening.
“Come here, Natty,” you murmur, your voice firm but soft. She steps forward, her movements hesitant but her gaze locked on you, and you guide her down onto the bed until she’s hovering over you, her body settling between your legs. Her breath catches as she takes you in, her wide, adoring eyes drinking in the sight of you beneath her, looking up at her with that unwavering, confident smile that’s made her melt all night.
As Natasha hovers above you, her body fitting perfectly between your legs, you can feel the nervous tremble in her limbs, her cheeks flushed as she takes in the sight of you lying beneath her, waiting. Her wide eyes, so shy and adoring, sweep over your face and then down, drinking in every inch of your body, as though each glance leaves her more entranced. Her lips part slightly, her breath coming in short, shallow gasps as she steadies herself, hands resting tentatively on either side of you.
You reach up, cupping her face in your hands and guiding her closer, pressing a soft kiss to her lips, feeling the heat radiate off her skin. She melts into you, her body instinctively pressing down, filling the space between you as her lips respond, moving tenderly yet hungrily, every kiss leaving her more breathless. With a gentle nudge, you guide her hips forward, feeling her length brush against your entrance, and she lets out a soft, broken gasp, her face flushed a deep pink as she begins to press into you.
You hum, running your hands through her hair, tugging gently to pull her closer, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to her lips. She gasps against your mouth, her lips parting as you deepen the kiss, feeling her shiver as she responds, her body pressing eagerly into yours. She lets out a soft, desperate moan as she slides inside, her hands gripping the sheets beside you.
“Oh,” she murmurs, barely above a whisper, her eyes fluttering shut as she feels the warmth of your body surrounding her, enveloping her in a way that leaves her trembling. Her breath hitches, and she clutches the sheets beside you, her hands forming tight fists as she adjusts to the feeling, her gaze filled with wonder as she looks down at you.
“Good girl,” you whisper, watching the way her face softens at the praise, her body shuddering as she begins to move, her hips rolling forward in slow, tentative strokes. You feel each careful movement, each deliberate inch of her body pressing into yours, her lips parted in a quiet moan, her eyes half-lidded as she loses herself in the rhythm, her shy gaze growing more intense with each passing second.
With every thrust, her body trembles, her gaze filled with a raw vulnerability as though she’s giving herself to you completely, utterly. She clutches the sheets even tighter, her breathing quickening, her eyes never leaving yours as she moves deeper, her breath coming in soft, desperate pants.
“That’s it, Natty,” you murmur, running a hand along her cheek, feeling the way her breath catches at your touch. “Just like that.”
Her lips part in response, a soft whimper escaping her as her hips begin to move faster, her body pressing into yours with a growing urgency that she can barely control. She shivers, the need and intensity in her gaze building with every touch, every whispered word of encouragement. Her lashes flutter as she looks down at you, her cheeks a deep shade of pink, her expression vulnerable, almost pleading, as though she wants more but can barely bring herself to ask for it.
“Right there, Daddy,” you murmur, your voice soft, just loud enough for her to hear. The word slips from your lips easily, and you watch the way her entire being responds—the tremor in her hips, the widening of her eyes, the soft, desperate whine that falls from her lips. Her face and neck flush a deeper, unmistakable red, and for a moment, she looks at you with pure, unguarded awe, her expression caught between disbelief and overwhelming need.
Her hands tremble, her hips stuttering as she takes in the title, her body pressing instinctively deeper as though the sound alone draws her closer to the edge. “Daddy,” you whisper again, watching her face as she loses herself in the word, her expression filling with a blend of shyness and barely contained desire.
“P-please…” she stammers, her voice trembling, almost breaking as she holds herself back, her body trembling with the strain of it. “I… I need…”
You reach up, running your hand through her hair, guiding her gaze back to yours. “It’s okay, Natty,” you murmur, your voice soft, coaxing. “You don’t have to hold back.”
Her wide eyes fill with a deep, unrestrained need, and she lets out a soft, shaky exhale, her hands sliding from the sheets to grip your waist, holding you as though grounding herself. Her movements grow more erratic, her hips pressing deeper, her body responding to every encouraging word, every touch, as though completely under your control.
As she moves, you see the way she loses herself in each thrust, her face flushed, her mouth open as her breath comes in ragged, desperate pants. She looks down at you with that same innocent, adoring gaze, but now, there’s something more—something raw, a hunger she can barely contain. Her hips press forward, filling you completely, her body shuddering as she reaches the edge, her wide eyes pleading, searching your gaze for permission.
“Come for me, Daddy,” you whisper, your voice soft but firm, and you feel the way her body reacts, her grip tightening on your waist as she shudders, her hips jerking forward in a desperate, trembling thrust. Her eyes close as she gasps, her head falling forward as she loses herself completely, spilling into you with a soft, broken moan, her body pressing close, clinging to you as though she’s never felt anything so intense.
As Natasha trembles on top of you, her body pressed close, you feel every soft, shivering breath she takes, the weight of her against you as she finally lets go, spilling into you. Her head dips forward, eyes tightly shut, her lips parted in a quiet, desperate gasp as she comes, the warmth of her release filling you, a slow, deep pulse that seems to steal the breath from her lungs. Her grip tightens on your waist as if she’s clinging to you, grounding herself in the sensation, her face buried in the crook of your neck.
You can feel her chest rising and falling against you, her breaths ragged and shallow as she lets out a soft whimper, the vulnerability in her voice making your heart swell. Her hips press forward with each wave, as though she wants to be as close to you as possible, feeling every inch of her warmth, every pulse, spill into you, marking you in a way that’s both intimate and utterly consuming.
Each pulse of her release sends a shiver through her, her breathing shallow and uneven as she slowly comes down from the high, her eyes fluttering open, looking down at you with a dazed, awestruck expression. She looks at you with a mixture of gratitude and worship, her cheeks still flushed, her lips parted in a soft, blissful smile.
You brush a hand along her cheek, and she leans into your touch, closing her eyes as she takes a deep, steadying breath, her hands still holding you close, as though she can’t bear to let go.
“Natty,” you murmur, running your hands through her hair, guiding her face up to meet your gaze. Her eyes open slowly, her lashes fluttering as she looks at you, her gaze soft, overwhelmed, filled with a raw, unguarded adoration that she can’t hide. Her face is flushed, her lips slightly parted, her expression completely mesmerised as though she can barely believe you’re here, beneath her, accepting every bit of her.
A soft, blissful smile tugs at her lips, her hand moving up to gently cradle your face as she leans in, pressing a delicate, lingering kiss to your lips, her breaths still heavy, warm. She holds you like this, savouring the closeness, the feel of you wrapped around her, the warmth of her release settling within you.
Finally, she shifts, her forehead resting against yours, her eyes wide, her breath still uneven, as though she’s only just starting to come back to herself. She looks at you with a mixture of awe and disbelief, her fingers tracing your jawline softly, reverently.
“I… I didn’t mean to…” she stammers, her face flushing deeper, her shy gaze flicking away for a moment.
But you smile, reaching up to cup her face, bringing her gaze back to yours, your voice soft and reassuring. “Natty… it’s okay,” you murmur, brushing a thumb over her cheek. “I wanted this, too. I asked.”
She lets out a soft, relieved exhale, her body relaxing as she sinks into you, her arms wrapping around you, holding you as though afraid to let go. You feel her heartbeat gradually slow, her warmth enveloping you, her gaze still soft, full of that same innocent awe as she watches you, completely lost in the moment.
As Natasha catches her breath, her fingers lingering on your skin as though afraid to break the closeness between you, she finally shifts to pull out, a soft, satisfied sigh escaping her lips. She watches with wide, almost mesmerised eyes as your bodies separate, and her gaze drops to the way your mixed warmth slowly begins to spill out of you, the evidence of everything you’ve shared glistening in the low light.
Her lips part, her cheeks flushed as her gaze stays fixed, almost transfixed, and she can’t hide the blush that rises as she takes it all in. She’s caught somewhere between admiration and disbelief, her wide eyes drinking in every detail as though this might all disappear any second.
“Take a picture; it’ll last longer, Natty,” you tease, your smirk playful, voice soft, cutting through her daze. She looks up, startled, blinking as she registers your words. But after a second, she lets out a quiet, breathless laugh, her blush deepening as she reaches over to grab her phone, still trembling slightly from the intensity of the moment. She snaps a quick picture, her gaze flicking between the screen and you, clearly savouring every second. The reverence in her expression makes your heart skip, a feeling of pride filling you as you watch her.
Once she’s put the phone aside, she reaches over with a soft, sheepish smile, helping you sit up and adjust yourself. Her gaze softens, that shy, affectionate look taking over as she wraps her arms around you, holding you close, savouring the warmth that lingers between you both.
And then she glances at the bed, a small, nervous laugh escaping as she spots her carefully scattered history notes—now crinkled, a little rumpled, with more than a few slightly smudged edges. Without missing a beat, she moves to gather them, straightening the papers, her cheeks still a warm shade of pink as she moves to tidy up.
a/n- apologies if this is the worst piece i've written LOL i've been surviving on a few hours of sleep for the past few days- big thanks to jess for somehow helping me get through this, i'll let you keep your ps5. sigh. i'd still build a princess castle tho.
#romugh's nerd!natty#men and minors dni#romugh slays#romugh writes#natasha romanoff#natasha romanoff reader#natasha romanoff x reader#black widow#nerdy natty forever my love#nerd natasha#natasha romanoff smut#bottom natasha romanoff#romugh dies#scarlett johansson x reader#scarlett johansson reader#black widow smut
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It's either something completely new or a rework of paper kingdoms, imo. I don't know if they would want to release paper kingdoms the way it was in like 2012 or whenever because it was so dark and I don't think that came from a good place and not one from where you want to make a comeback with your band, especially when that's not supposed be based on nostalgia. Which it would probably be with the leak and all.
But I think a rework is entirely possible based on the picture and I also just feel like it would make sense, idk.
Or it's entirely new because they don't want anything to do with that anymore and want to start completely fresh, which would go quite well with my interpretation of wwwy and that the show was about rebirth and all that. Reworking paper kingdoms would also fit that I guess because they'd make something new out of something old? Idk.
Or they just do the same thing they did with Conventional Weapons and Danger Days. Keep a few things of paper kingdoms and build off of that, but it's not actually paper kingdoms, which is kinda like my reworking theory I guess, but a little farther away from paper kingdoms... idk I'm just rambling, it's late and I should be asleep
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daily infinites 31-40 hes so sillay!! blehhh :P
part 1 part 2 part 3
#engies daily dogs#infinite the jackal#my art#sonic forces#sonic frontiers#sage#metal sonic#shadow the hedgehog#zavok#chaos#sonic the hedgehog#gadget the wolf#reworked my human infinite design a bit. i think i really popped off with the designer sunglasses#i want to change his jacket but i just cant decide on what i want to do so i keep drawing it the same haha#i think it needs more useless belts and otherwise pointless straps and things though#sth
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I see you've changed Shadowstar from being first to die. Sneaky, sneaky. You sly.. cat, you, Bones. Was that on purpose, out of spite for Shadowstar's Life?
B'aww, you got me <3 Yeah I hate that book.
Shadowstar: *breathes in public*
Erins:
#STOP DOING THE SHADOW FAMILY DIRTY YOU ANIMALS#''i love my nephew sun shadow. he reminds me of my dead brother''#Erins coming up from behind with a lead pipe to kill him immediately#bone babble#That's the deepest reason you'll find though. The PRIMARY reason is very simple; it just makes the most sense.#She's pious and keeps to herself.#She didn't have to waste her lives fighting SkyClan#It's why I said FOR NOW in that post though. If I end up having another conflict I want to rework from DOTC I may have Shadow take it.#but I think the... sort of coup was dumb.#I could have my mind changed on adapting it but as it stands I don't really care to give it any love.
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me when i write a character who is prone to dooming themself and then they run off and doom themself. core traits are stubbornness and a willingness to disregard their own humanity gET BACK HERE IM NOT DONE WITH YOU
#rambling#surprisingly this is not about jakob.. im just really consistent about my favorite character archetypes 😭😭#WARNING THE NOTES ON THIS ARE REALLY LONG I STARTED RAMBLING#“ouhh i have a headache i'll just lie down and rotate my blorbos in no general direction for a while until it goes away” and then boom.#serious plot considerations. 2 questions answered 24million new questions raised. this is specifically Not what i asked for.#so now im sitting here STILL dizzy running mental calculations on how i can get this bitch out of peril without reworking everything#but they literally keep dying in every timeline 😭😭 every single plausible road leads to them running off and screwing themself over#“character who doesn't realize they want to live until it's way too late to look back” VS#“character who is forced to live and handle the things they never though they'd survive long enough to deal with” FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.#fucking hell i have never had this much trouble writing a character as i have with them#they genuinely do just run off and do shit without my permission and then i have to pace for an hour or two wondering#“ok they wOULD do that. but should they. do i feel like i can confidently write that.”#im like constantly in this tug of war trying to get them to CHILL#but also they are absolutely my favorite character from the entire project. but like. FUCK GET BACK HERE#is death the most satisfying end to this arc? is someone who was Set on dying then NOT dying the most satisfying end to the arc?#how many bridges can you burn until you irreparably set yourself aflame too?#would ghost or revival plotline work?? would it make sense with the worldbuilding??#do i just Like Them enough to want them to not die?? where do i draw the line between personal bias and a good arc?#is death not feeling as impactful as survival solely because i've been writing for so long that it's lost the initial impact?#and other such plot considerations...#im gonna have such an easy time writing another character though 😭😭 because THAT character's dynamic in the second act#is to stare at character 1 and be like “why are you like this. i mean i know Why but can you chill. please.” and like damn bro me too#actually wait no i think kaey.a is the hardest character i've ever written i take it back#had to worry about his 20million facades AND his Actual feelings AND canon compliance. shit is hard#i still havent finished the k/aeya fic i started back when the chasm first released which is uhh. two years ago. oops.#i think i struggle writing emotionally repressed liars i think thats what this is 😭😭 anyways.#(voice of guy who has been obsessed with nonlinear narratives and tragedies for several years):#“is it too much to kill this character in a nonlinear exploration game with tragic elements”#like bitch what are you talking about 😭😭 YOU'RE the target audience here figure it out#sorry the notes on this are just my writing journal now apparently
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probably going to rework my human bellum design again
#surprise surprise im still not satisfied with it but i think i have the base down#might just rework his clothing a liiiiitle and maybe like. give him at least slightly darker skin#he still comes off as edgy or some shit to me. i still want to stick with the violent delinquent sorta angle#i just feel like its a bit much or whatever. he just seems too unremarkable but also too detailed#or something. with the scars all over. maybe its bc i cant picture him v well in the game artstyle? but ive never cared much abt that#tho looking at the comms ive gotten of him. he seems fine. the x on the eyepatch might be a bit much#maybe he can customize it when he materializes it idk and the x is a default. its made of sand when you inspect it#it might also help to write him more. force myself to think abt him in situations#in other news im thinking abt damien possible post ph healing magic. i like the idea i have#i really need to fiure out more defined post ph arcs it does bother me how aimless it is#i know vague stuff but very little specifics. it needs a fucking plot#i do want to keep bellums human form making him look closely related to link. i like that#its funny if nothing else#salty talks#damiens fine hes just a guy he doesnt need anything too fancy. if i think abt it too long my certainty dissolves#wow i love being insecure ablut my ideas. i love rsd. ohhhhhhhhh boyyy#now its a minor vent. w/e. at rhis rate im. gonna start talking abt how my job scheduled me on a shift#with the literal bare minimum number of scheduled workers so if its slightly busy its going to be a living hell#at least i get paid for closing so when closing inevitably takes over an hour bc i have to do it alone im getting paid more#if i wasnt motivated by money itd be so fucking over for me in the workforce
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You're more amazing than dreams
Nerfed signposts!
#some of them were really simple nerfs like Seeker of Power only draining once instead of for each attacking modified creature#and on the other end Bestower of Wisdom got so thoroughly reworked it needed a new name#also i reworked Twilight Pegasus right now; my original nerf had it give flying to a creature with lesser power when it attacked#but that would be punishing you for buffing your valiant creatures#and also some valiant abilities buff power which would make the pegasus' ability fizzle#some of these were really bullshit like Awoken Ingenuity killing an opponent's creature and then drawing free cards when it attacks#absurd card advantage machine#Violent Blacksmith maybe wasn't too strong but the mana adding ability felt more green than red#Mutant Bodybuilder giving free stats was pretty strong so now you have to pay mana and it can only buff itself#Faith Given Form gave too many free stats and was an angel without flying so i gave it conditional flying/vigilance#Mutator's Masterpiece had a lot of text so i cut the 2nd ability and increased the cost & base stats to make it more of a late-game card#i also just reworked it right now; it used to draw a card when the 3rd counter was put on it#but even aside from power concerns that's just not necessary. keep it more focused#i think part of why i made the cards more complex is because i felt the need to justify them being multicolor#but i've noticed that's not always necessary#for example Kraum Violent Cacophony doesn't do anything remotely red#anyway i just adjusted Twilight Pegasus again. i had it give a flying counter to target creature when it dies but i cut it#it's enough for it to just be a good cheap flier that gets bigger#i wanted it to also have a way to trigger valiant but nah there's plenty of targeting effects in the set#it's fine for it to just be a good valiant creature
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daeshim thoughts now that we've seen a little more of neve and ik more abt the factions 💆💆
#def going to rework him into one of my rooks BUT his tevinter background works SOOOO much better with this game and i'm very excited abt it#very torn between keeping him a grey warden or having him be a shadow dragon instead tho :(#shadow dragon i think works better with what i have in mind for him currently but i'm also very attached to him being a warden so idk yet#da:v posting#< just going to use that as a catchall for my ramblings#dae does want tevinter to be better but he holds little hope for it#but he also loves to help people so idk. idk !!!!#and him being a warden approaching his calling. GAHH
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organised everything i have for it so far + tentatively cut some things (that i may put back if i find there’s missing beats but otherwise they were kinda unnecessary for the current vision) and refined my chapter two outline so if i have time at work tomorrow i can play around with it and write something like yayyyy i love when past me sets myself up like this
#it’s def a beast of a chapter but I have a better grasp on it now#i already knew this but realising how much the idea of writing long litfic chapters gives me anxiety like#I keep thinking it’s overwriting! that im not being efficient enough!#when it’s like girl craft theory aside this story is for YOU!#I think mainly it’s still not knowing how the balance will be like#ch1 is a mystery bc I’m reworking that but chapter 3 is gonna be under 1k#whereas this is def breaking 7k I think#I will see i like the idea of playing w chapter lengths !#there’s a middle part between parts 1 and 2 that’s just one long chapter which will be so fun#but at the same time I kinda have to be mindful of chapter lengths atm#because I want that one to be effective in its length and idk if it will be if there’s chapters past a certain word count#I will def have time at work to write tho. without elaborating on my job I am there all day + sleep there 💖
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I’m gonna be honest, I kind of really want to re work the dsmp cat au and scale it down a bunch.
I started it right after the Manberg vs Pogtopia war so that was the original center point of the plot, tho tweaked to fit in some other character dynamics. As more lore kept getting added I tried to fit them in but some of it really went against my original ideas which had me constantly reworking things, and it became pretty difficult fitting in new characters as they were introduced despite me really wanting to add everyone.
I’ve been trying to iron out the plot since the dsmp ended and wanted to focus more on the Karlnap/ity plot while I was working on that but well, now all that feels really sour too.
Lately I’ve had little to no desire to work on it and I think the only way for me to enjoy it again is to scale it down, rework the lore to fit what I originally had in mind, make it more dtk+ focused, and cut a whole lot of characters.
I’m sorry if that disappoints some people that might have followed the au for over 2 years now, absolutely feel free to ask about any characters that I didn’t really talk about, because I did have some plot ideas for them all. I would also still like to finish everyone’s design, but probably with less detailed refs.
#pom talks#dsmp cat au#been thinking about this for months now so yeah#sorry#I know the au might not seem messy but with the stuff I have written down and in my head its just way too much to keep track of#a lot of the time I can't even remember what I have or haven't talked about#so yeah I just think it will be better to start from scratch and not feel forced to add stuff just to make it fit canon#like I could never manage to work in the Exile Arc because Dream and Tommy were meant to be FRIENDS in this au#so rework it is#I will probably make a completely different au tag cuz I don't really want to delete things either#quackity neg#i guess just to be sure
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#i really really want to do NaNo this year#I’ve been working hard on an outline and world building and I think NaNo would be a great challenge to get as much done as possible#November is always one of the busiest possible months which is why I don’t do it often#and this year we’re getting ready for the holidays as well as the babies first birthday (!!!)#but I really want to try it this year#I even have two separate fanfic ideas to work on if I get stuck on my main project just to keep up with writing things#I reworked my nano page a bit today and if you’re participating too send me a message! we can be friends over there 😊
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Thinking abt my bndori ocs again... I need to draw them more I love them all sm
#rat rambles#oc posting#band posting#momoko especially drawing her earlier made me remember just how much I adore her#but Im also thinking oh so hard abt kou I need to rework their design for the 50th time at some point#momoko has such a perfect design tho she's like high key one of my favorite designs Ive ever made#I just think her shapes and colors are neat#I should totally make them all furry designs even if I dont rly have any ideas for them#I do generally make momoko a frog in au stuff tho so she can be a frog ig#yuriko is technically sorta a bat in the random card au but thats mostly just a nodd at rokka backstory#the other two do not as of now have any connections to any animals so I fully have nothing for them#I could see yori being some sort of hog or smth and kou could be a mongoose or smth idk#that also reminds me Ive been meaning to make olivia and jackie furry designs for funsies#I mean I already moddled their designs off of animals so it wouldnt be hard#Ive just been struggling to draw thats all#hopefully Ill keep building momentum into getting back into drawing more#although today was kind of rough I am starting to get off my ass a lil#mostly cause I finally found smth that I want to do in the future even if its just seeing my friends#I wanna meet them in person and the fact that thats smth I have to look forward to is making me feel much better#even if it wont happen soon just the fact that Ive added that to the 'thing I will do someday' list helps a lot with my mood#cause its just smth of a future I can get into my head yknow?#smth I can think of thats not just today and tomorrow
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I do need to sit down today and draft a new budget even though it scares me. I need to be realistic about it too. I really don't enjoy budgeting. Neither me nor wifey are especially gifted with it, and it makes us both anxious and avoidant, so it's really unfortunate.
Definitely one of the tasks for the personal assistant chart once I can afford one.
#for any one wondering:#i have an ongoing understanding with my wife that should our finances ever allow it there are two services i want to hire out#household maintenance care and the phone call/mail/email/bills bermuda triangle of disaster#between the two of we are so fucking bad at these things but they are so essential to basic functioning#that it genuinely harms us when we fuck up#so for now we keep chugging along#lots of radical acceptance and self compassion and executive functioning support strategies to try and keep the plates spinning#but some day theoretically we'll have the money to pay a freelancer to come in and spend 1-2 hours a couple of days per week#just.....helping us deal with some of this stuff#i'd pay them very well#i'm thinking something like $100/day for maybe 2 hours work?#i just want someone who will sort and respond to my mail for me and schedule my appts/log them in my calendar and shoot me a text about it#someone who washes all the dishes down to baseline once a week and helps me do organizational planning/reworking once a month#not big stuff by any means but life changing to me#especially if their role is largely body doubling with me while I do other cleaning/organizing tasks so double the work can get done#anyway its purely hypothetical now and for a long time to come but i keep track of what tasks we may need help with#so i can prioritize and understand how many hours of support we would really need each week
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Hi! In your NSR swap AU, does Sayu still go by ze/mer? Since ze is clearly not a mermaid but a tree person… maybe ze/fir instead?
OMFG that would be awesome!
But uh, I'm thinking of redoing my entire Swap AU, so I don't know if Sayu would still be a plant elemental. I honestly don't like the direction I took with Eve, Sayu, and DJSS. Or at least I don't like their designs all that much anymore (Sayu's I do like but the concept itself I want to change).
I feel like I leaned way too heavily on swapping characters with personalities AND themes. Making it seem like characters are mashing together and overlapping in certain aspects, making them seem less unique to each other.
I do definitely want to keep Sayu as a plant elemental, or something close to that, so ze/fir would be amazing pronouns! So yeah! ze/fir plant Sayu for the win! :D
#nsr#eritalks#noart#asks#i really need to get onto reworking that au#i'm fine with y/inu 1/010 and k/u f/yra's things going on#and taking time to think about other AUs#like my frau#has really helped me try to keep personalities and stuff#so hopefully one day i get to reworking everything#especially since i want to draw luna and zuke together some more#and explore their relationship together
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i’m gonna hit 60k in nano tomorrow woa... crazy what you can achieve when you write 10k in a day and then also keep writing 1.7k+ for the following week
#the moon speaks#turns out if you write words then you have words written. that you can reread at your leisure. crazy#will i learn from this and keep writing daily once december hits? only time will tell#ALSO is there a support group for people who prefer writing aus and canon divergence stuff over the canon story#it's not even that i don't like the canon story or that it needs a radical rework it's just. very angsty.#which is intentional! and good story telling also!#but not as fun to write as dumb little crackfics and if it's not fun then i don't want to write it. that's my main flaw i think#all that good advice abt ''if you don't enjoy writing it people won't enjoy reading it'' just DOESN'T APPLY TO ME#i have multiple sources who say the awful bad boring action scenes are gripping. they're just the WORST to write#ANYWAY IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM ANY MORE HAHA I DID MY 50K NOW I'M FREE#even febslash though i love it is going to go out the window the moment i think of another maximum silliness plot
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man.
#ya know what. Maybe the kids are gonna be alright....#Im here listening to “the unused content of mario 64” and im remembering back to a time where I would type in on youtube a mario game#that iv never played and just white “top 10 secrets” and go down a rabitthole of content farms#maybe were too pesimistic about whats rotting kids brains#i feel like my parents#hearing stuff like this from my fellow nerd friends#even now im thinking back to when i was a kid and getting frustrated thatadults were not open minded to my humor#i dont wanna be a grouchy fuck#i wanna be open minded#i want to keep reworking my thinking......
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