#hyuna solo
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se eu me vejo bonit⍺, quem pode dꪱzer o contrarꪱo? 🍎
#teemo moods#moodboard#kpop moodboard#kpop#messy moodboard#gg layouts#icons#layouts#messy icons#soft icons#hyuna#hyuna solo#hyuna moodboard#hyuna soloist#hyuna icons#hyuna layouts#hyuna messy#hyuna soft#soloist#soloist moodboard#soloist icons#soloist layouts
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gang imma be so real I HOPE TO GOD R7 FOCUSES DEEPLY ON LUKA
like i knowwwww everyone is excited to see tills pov but also at the same time
its luka
its timw for luka luka night
i need to see him make weird and sexy faces
i need him to do a little bit of light yagami expressions
i need him to panic and feel like hes on top of the world
i need him to act cocky and deranged
i need to see him loseeeee i need to see till get an upper hand and luka freaking outtttt
and i need hyuna to see him freaking outtttttt
i need luka
#alien stage#alnst#alnst luka#luka alnst#hyuna alnst#guys lets be so fr luka solos/j#i need him in every variety he comes in
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀• 𝗋𝗈𝗌𝖾́ 𝗆𝗈𝗈𝖽𝖻𝗈𝖺𝗋𝖽. ♡
#soft icons#messy icons#messy moodboards#soft moodboards#blackpink#jennie blackpink#twice#moodboard#twice icons#solo hyuna#roseanne park#rose icons#rose blackpink#jisoo moodboard#jisoo layouts#jisoo icons#jennie layouts#jennie icons#rose moodboard
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wow thank you so much
#this is aoa's official youtube. it has 20 million views. :')#also this is the performance version of 'ai wo choudai' and like. God the choreo is . ooughw :(#it is So bland. this is one of The Songs Ever to me. and the choreo is giving Nothing.#it's not even... a decent sexy choreo. bcus this is so rooted in the era of kpop girlies either give cute - sexy or badass#yeah i Know it released in 2016 but aoa stayed true to their roots to the end lol. and 2016 was the tide changing anywya.#honestly the trichotemy was pretty bad but i tended to enjoy anything that fell under the 'sexy' label. the BEst bangers came outta that#(exid i lvoe you. sistar i love you. stellar i love you. fiestar i lvoe you. hellovenus i lo)#and. oh i feel terrible saying this. i would rather have the miserable trichotomy than most groups giving#~feminism~ through the lens of misogyny. it's like. Feminism but make it marketable and tell young women this is Fine#also softcore queerbaiting.#like every Knew the trichotemy was misogynist af. i didn't have to read posts saying that blackpink gave women rights#okay actually. wait. people were genuinely saying things like hyuna's red were feminsit anthems weren't they. okay nvm#i think the bar for 'progressive' is so low in kpop that it is in hell. to be honest.#like we have and have had more progressive thigns in music videos and lyrics in mainstream kpop#mostly from soloists or solo work from band members#moonbyul's shutdown is. clearly about having sex with a woman.#brown eyed girls' abracadabra is okay.... YES the angling is steeped in male gaze#but having a clearly wlw relationship in the mv Was iconic for the era. still is mroe brazen than most mvs dare to be.#also that sistar one where they kill a man together and run off being fruity.#one mroe day! that one!#so yknow. shoutout to the actual icons.#loftwinglullaby rambles#kpop
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Ranking Solo Debut Songs 💟
I really regret not splitting this list up into 2 parts. It’s sooooo long
ISLAND - YOUHA
GGOMA - Taeho feat. Yegeun Choi
Baragi - Hyunjun Hur
Getaway - Nlve feat. JMSN
Running Through the Night - Seori
Door - Kwon Eun Bi
HUSH RUSH - LEE CHAE YEON
Binu - BIBI
Change - HyunA
From20 - from20
Cassette - DEMIAN
Benefits - Zior Park
BIRTHDAY - JEON SOMI
SMILEY - YENA
Midnight Blue - B.I
Open Mind - WONHO
L.O.V.E - PARK JI HOON
Eternal Summer - echan
GLASSY - JO YURI
Gravity - Ong Seong Wu
Love is Love - jiae
Neverland - Holland
Recipe - WOODZ & Flowsik
What Are You Up To - KANGDANIEL
Red Moon - KIM WOO SEOK
Dumped Yesterday - Stella Jang
Fall in Love Again - ALEPH
Spring Breeze - Kim Jae Hwan
Lady - Yunbin
Some How - Ahn Ye Eun
24 Hours - SUNMI
MAKE U DANCE - ADORA feat. EUNHA
Happy Trip - TAERYEONG
Bird - HA SUNG WOON
Hopeless Love - JAMIE
Play - Yuju
Lost Child - IU
Why Don’t You Know - CHUNG HA feat. Nucksal
ID;PEACE B - BoA
MONEY - DAWN
RUN - Sorn
Coming Home - GSoul
Bomb - AleXa
Sunflower - Colde
Heaven’s Door - Eric Nam
Across the Universe - Yerin Baek
Bad Man - RAIN
my - youra
TV STAR - HELLO GLOOM
#ranking#solo#kpop#debut#yerin baek#taeho#yegeun Choi#nlve#kwon eunbi#hyunjun hur#rain#bibi#seori#jamie#hyuna#yuju#lee chaeyeon#yena#jo yuri#from20#dawn#zior park#eric nam#jeon somi#Sunmi#b.i#iu#boa#kang daniel#chungha
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What's your favorite music genre?
Mostly indie/alternative and pop (a bit of rock) though I'm not a puriste by any means. I have songs that i like across most genres
Tink things like Of Monsters and Men, Marina, Imagine Dragons, Taylor Swift, Aly & AJ, Angèle, Alice et Moi, Mashrou' Leila, some Hayley Kiyoko, Pomme, and Lorde (especially her older albums) to name a few
#ask#anon#oh and some kpop#tho im not into bands just solo female artists like CungHa Sunmi and HyunA
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youtube
I CALLED IT I CALLED IT I FUCKING CALLED IT A HYUNA COVER LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Everyone has a solo cover expect Ivan and Hyuna doesn't have a cover at all. So I expect the next cover to be a Ivan solo cover or a cover featuring Hyuna at the very least.
(I know they already covered all the songs out now but even last year they didn't drop all the covers at the same time so maybe they'll cover Blink Gone)
#now only the Ivan solo cover is left#and maybe a hyunaluka one#alnst has to stop dropping covers left and right when i'm sleeping#alien stage#alnst#hyuna alnst#alnst cover#Youtube
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i had an idea about an AU my s-class hunters inspired debut or die so i'm sharing it ^^ i wrote it fast without thinking much so don't take it too seriously...
! there's big spoilers for debut or die novel so don't read if you don't want to be spoiled !l
like in canon, yoohyun left yoojin (for x reason) and yoojin is well, sad. Until one day he woke up in is brother body, several years in the past, with the ultimatum of debuting as an idol or he will die. Of course yoojin is not going to let his brother body die, and like in dod, every information about himself disapeared.
so like, contrary to moondae, yoojin don't know much about idol, so I had different idea to "help" him. 1, the system window is talking to him and giving advice (newcomer) 2, yoohyun was a solo idol and yoojin keeped track of him.
anyway, idol inc happens and for the group i was thinking on making a mixed group (discarding season 2 of idol inc).
for the group i imagined yoohyun(yoojin) as a leader/singer, yerim as a main rapper/dancer, noah main dancer/singer (inspired ahyeon) and then... i don't really know :/ i like myeongwoo but i can't really imagine him singing/dancing or rapping so... since the groupe is "young" i wondered if i could put soyoung too? but then i couln't do a jupiter "groupe", and at the same time having hyunjae and soyoung around the same age? weird. So yeah, apart from noah and yerim i'm not sure about yoojin's group. of course yoojin would take care of everyone and everthing, this guy don't change.
for hyunjae, well, it's easy to say he's taking the place of cheongryeo!
as i was typing i realised that myeongwoo could be a producer, like raebin. so maybe singer/producer? since there's a lot of singers, soyoung should be a rapper.
anyway, let's go back to hyunjae. hyunjae is an all rounder obviously, the king of everything, except he don't really do live and variety show. contrary to cheongryeo i like to think he would do a lot of solo stuff outside of the groupe.
talking of the group! of course mixed again. at this point i'm a bit strugling because i don't know if i want hyuna to be in the same groupe as hyunjae or another girl only group. if she's in a gg, she would be with riette and nonames. if she isn't, i like the lineup hyunjae, hyuna, taewon, evelyn and maybe riette. i don't know about making riette an idol if hyuna is with the other. she could be someone who work in the industry, and cause trouble to noah but have a good relationship with soyoung.
for the roles i'm not sure, but rapper/main dancer hyuna is good, singer evelyn, rapper taewon maybe?
going back to hyunjae, like cheongryeo he came back multiple time in the past to achieve the missions. and he would probably annoy yoojin a lot, but as time pass, they would reach a relation of trust and try to break the system together.
yoojin will remember about a past he forgot, his suicide and the other life of everyone (yerim, noah, myeongwoo but also hyuna, taewon and hyunjae) and how yoohyun saved his life with the system.
contrary to dod, i think it would be better if yoojin return to his body. and i have two ideas at how it can happens. 1 well, uh, magic. yoojin live in his body, but everybody who isn't aware of the system think that the idol yoohyun always looked like that and was always named yoojin. he kept being an idol, and his brother continue being his number 1 fan. for those who read the novel, it's like the arc "Company <System> update" where everybody forgot moondae. idea 2, since yoohyun got back in his body he became an idol, replacing his brother. yoojin became their's manager, and hyunjae always try to get him become his manager's group ;)
this is the end, my brain cannot do much more for now ^^' if i have other idea, i'll share them but for now that's all. if you got inspired feel free to write about it, just mention me that's all i ask. and link me your work so i can see it (☆▽☆)/
#han yoojin#han yoohyun#sung hyunjae#bak yerim#moon hyuna#noah luire#riette luire#song taewon#evelyn miller#yoo myeongwoo#my s class hunters#the s classes that i raised#sctir#kang soyoung#park moondae#debut or die#kim raebin#keun sejin#bae sejin#ryu chungwoo#cha eugene#seon ahyeon#testar#vtic#cheongryeo#manhwa#novel#idea prompt#fanfiction ideas#kitty writings
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Under the cut is an analysis/rambling on Round 7 of Alien Stage! It contains spoilers, so please proceed with caution
Why is this on my main? Great question. Because I can
I found it interesting how in Round 7, Till and Luka kinda sound more like each other in a way. We don’t get the desperation in Till’s tone like we normally do until the chorus. (Or that could just be my ears)
Luka’s voice isn’t as soft as it was in Round 5? He might be trying to copy Ivan in his singing and not just his mannerisms.
I also just noticed that the winners of every round are listed first on Spotify.
Till’s guitar solo makes me think that they were, once again, trying to make us think that Till would win. The lights, too. Everything was Till’s color, but I feel as though it was predetermined from the start.
Imagine how it’d be if Till was the winner. He’d have Mizi, or would she be shot for escaping? Would Till end up alone again or would Mizi and Till have the opportunity to heal together? Would Hyuna die, too for trying to skew the result?
What is going to happen to Hyuna, Luka and Mizi? The round is the final one, but there’s definitely information we’re missing. Luka is the survivor of the last round. Will he go on for a third?
Was Ivan’s sacrifice in vain? Likely. But he would have preferred that to wathcing Till die.
The brevity of Round 7 is probably accurate to how it felt to Till. Blink, Gone.it’s done.
#alien stage#alien stage spoilers#alnst till#alnst luka#there is mentions of others but they’re not the focus so no tag#alien stage round 7#alnst round 7
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀• 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗆𝗈𝗈𝖽𝖻𝗈𝖺𝗋𝖽 (𝗍𝖺𝖾𝗄𝗈𝗈𝗄). ♡
#soft icons#messy icons#messy moodboards#soft moodboards#blackpink#jennie blackpink#twice#moodboard#twice icons#solo hyuna#taehyung moodboard#taehyung icons#taehyung#jungkook moodboard#jungkook icons#jeon jungkook#jungkook#couple moodboard#couple
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What Kpop bands would the DBD characters listen to according to my opinion (It's just an opinion, you can disagree):
Part 2:
Niko I would definitely listen to a lot of kpop bands but if I had to narrow it down a bit I would probably say Seventeen, I feel like they have their vibes, with songs that talk about this idea of sweet, pink love and more relaxing sounds. If I had to name a girl group for her it would probably be Twice and New Jeans, once again a sweeter concept in some cases but they still have their strong moments and female power.
Now Crystal I actually thought a lot about what groups she would listen to, and I feel that she would like the colors and experimental style of Stray Kids, as well as their lyrics. As for female groups, I feel like I would listen to (G)i-dle or Lesserafim a lot, and their lyrics about female empowerment and breaking stereotypes, I feel like their aesthetics also fit with her. I would listen to Queendom or Eve, the psyche and the bluebeard's wife over and over again.
Jenny, I feel like she's a little more old school buuut a girl group she would definitely listen to is Mamamoo or their solo members, I mean the girls make references all the time about loving a girl. Probably CL or Hyuna too.
Also Monsta X with their themes and their more adult and sexy vibes, and Shinee and her concepts, I feel that it would be something that she would identify with.
okaay here is part two (? once again feel free to disagree or suggest anything else!
#dead boy detectives#save dead boy detectives#crystal palace#dead boy detective agency#dead boy detective netflix#renew dead boy detectives#niko sasaki#jenny the butcher#jenny green#kpop#dbd netflix#dbdshow
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Y'all
I've been wondering...how come the Aliens hadn't euthanised Till early, If he had a history of being outwardly aggressive? (They could have, right? What happens to the kids deemed unworthy of debuting?)
Well, in the "TOP 3" video, we see, that Till Is super popular. In one of his solo scenes, we see him "flipping the bird", except - he's showing his index finger, not his middle finger. It's not uncommon for entertainment agencies to manufacture a "rebellious persona".
I assume, that to the Aliens human emotions are a source of entertainment. They saw Till's agressive tendencies and decided, to market them. By that logic, Mizi's trauma of losing Sua is also played out for entertainment.
So, rather than trying to curb Till's aggressive tendencies, they're trying to keep him sedated, so that he "stays put" and doesn't rebel against the system.
The "TOP 3" are Till, Ivan and Luka. They all seem to have a clearly defined persona - Ivan is "stoic and mysterious", Luka is "The Prince" and Till is "wild rocker guy". It's also noteworthy, that Ivan's solo shots look like brand deals, symbolic of how he's willing to work with the Aliens.
On the other hand, Mizi is "The Diva". Her persona Is based on appearance and skill, rather than on hyperbolised personality traits.
Lastly, Till and Hyuna as parallels...I feel, that if we ever saw her, as a competitor, she'd have a persona similar to Till's. "All In" is a loud rock song, with "I Love Myself" message. I could write more about Hyuna in the context of "All In", but for now...Hyuna and Till are both "rebellious types", except Hyuna was able to break away from the script, while Till wasn't.
#lacie.txt#alien stage#alnst#alnst ivan#alnst till#alnst luka#alnst mizi#alnst sua#alnst hyuna#vivinos#qmeng#alien stage thoughts#thoughts#just my thoughts
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at the top — bsk
summary: it’s always said that it’s lonely at the top, you just didn’t believe it
tags: angst, fluff, idolverse, can be read as platonic or romantic wc: 2.8k an: this is very y/n centric but uhhh i hope its still enjoyable (y/n is basically IU in this universe if we wanna talk about popularity and success)
The flashing lights almost burn against your skin as a brigade of cameras relentlessly attack you from all sides. You stand still, a painful wide smile plastered onto your face just like you were trained to do all those years ago. You can hear voices shouting out to you, but they just sound like ringing in your ears.
After what feels like an eternity of being blinded you’re ushered into the event hall where the actual ceremony will be taking place. You can’t relax yet, though. The dress you’ve been forced into fits you uncomfortably and has been irritating you since the moment you put it on, but you can’t let it show as you shake hands with all the necessary people and exchange niceties. You nod along to whatever they’re saying and hope you don’t look too dead in the eyes as you do.
“Y/N-ah, it’s good to see you again.” Your brain finally releases you from its stupor to turn towards the familiar voice.
It’s a coping tactic you developed years ago, when you were too young to really deal with all of the fame and networking and diplomacy. You call it your Professionalism Haze where you just block out as much as you can while still maintaining a level of propriety. As you got older you never did lose the habit. If anything it’s probably the only thing getting you through these types of events without going mad.
“Hyunae-unnie,” you bow slightly to the woman who has approached you. Hyunae is one of the people in the industry who you wholeheartedly enjoy the company of. You two did your training together as it was believed you two would debut in the same group before it was decided you would both debut as solo artists instead.
“Congratulations on your recent comeback, and your many nominations tonight.” If it was any other artist speaking to you, you might believe there was malice or envy behind the words, but you know Hyunae is being completely sincere.
“Thank you. I send you good regards towards your own comeback as well.” You know your words don’t mean much as Hyunae’s comeback was not nearly as successful as yours, but you still hope to convey how proud you are of both of your successes, no matter how big or small.
You hear a loud commotion coming from the entrance of the building and you glance over to see SEVENTEEN entering the venue. The loud boys all move further into the venues, greeting people as they do.
You stare at them as they move as a unit. Their crisp suit jackets and styled hair and meticulously picked jewelry. Despite the gender difference between you two, you know that just as much time was put into making them presentable as it was with you. You wonder if their shoes pinch their feet the way yours do to you.
The group of thirteen men are up for a couple awards themselves tonight. You wouldn’t call yourself a fan of them, but you are well versed in their status. They interest you to say the least. You’ve never met another K-Pop idol like them individually, let alone a whole group of them.
Your eyes land on Boo Seungkwan. You find him the most interesting out of the whole group with his big personality and outstanding vocal talents. His hair is styled out of his face, slightly pushed back to change up his normal style. He’s dressed in a suit like the rest of his group. His suit is a navy color that is styled with a silky white under shirt. He has more necklaces than you do adorning his neck and like always, his signature smile graces his face.
The lights in the room are on the dimmer side, but he still shines, standing out from the rest of the crowd. One of his members says something to him and you can hear him laugh even from across the room. You stare at the way his face lights up even more, something you didn’t know was possible.
You study his body movements and the way he interacts with everyone around him. You see him smile at multiple people, but that’s not a surprise. Seungkwan is very popular. He’s very open with his body language and how he carries himself, something you’re not sure if you emulate properly.
You ponder how Seungkwan is objectively attractive, but to you he’s also subjectively attractive with his smooth skin and high cheekbones and bright eyes.
“Y/N?” Your attention is pulled back to your unnie and you apologize for spacing off. She brushes it off, far too well-versed in similar actions herself.
“Excuse me, I think I should go find my seat before the ceremony starts.” You bow once more to Hyunae before heading off in the general direction of where your manager told you your seat is. It doesn’t take you long to find it and you sit down in your chair, the first one at the table.
“Y/N!” You look up to see three men approaching you. One of them being the man you are guilty of staring at a few moments ago.
You stand and bow to them. “Hoshi-ssi, Dokyeom-ssi, Seungkwan-ssi.”
“Congratulations on another successful year,” Hoshi tells you. You know he’s not just referencing your recent comeback but all of the projects you’ve done within the past year including the first leg of your tour, premiering in a movie, the release a new fashion line, and several record-breaking comebacks.
“Ah, Y/N-noona you’re so cool,” DK says. “You do so much, it’s amazing that you’re still standing.”
“Yah, don’t say stuff like that!” Seungkwan smacks at DK’s arm. “Your diligence is very commendable Y/N-noona.”
“Thank you, though the work SEVENTEEN does is just as exemplary as mine.” It’s no secret how hard the boys work and how they’re constantly doing something whether it’s promotions, comebacks, variety shows, and anything of the like.
“Yah, you three! Stop walking off!” You turn your head to see S.Coups approaching. “I apologize for any troubles my members may have given you.” S.Coups bows to you. “Come on you guys.” Before you can even respond to S.Coups, the four men are walking off to their own table.
It doesn’t take long for things to start to settle down as the guests start to find their tables. You’re sitting at a table with a couple more solo artists. They all talk to one another but nobody spares you much of a glance. Or maybe it’s you who isn’t paying them any attention. It doesn’t matter either.
The ceremony starts and you sit there and stare at the shoes of everyone who walks on stage because the lights are shining too bright to look at their faces. You go through all the normal motions of what you’re supposed to. Clap when someone gets introduced, laugh when they make a joke, smile when something nice is said.
It’s not until the awards start that you force yourself to listen, and even then you start to space out at times. You’re nominated for four categories tonight. You’ll most likely win all four of them. You know you should be appreciative, but it all feels meaningless to you.
“This year’s Top Solo Female Idol is…L/N Y/N!”
You hear your voice called over the surround system and you automatically stand and smile, waving at where the cameras are placed. Your feet start to move to the stage before you can tell them to and then all of a sudden you’re standing on the stage, staring out at the crowd.
Your eyes try to focus on something in the audience. This time it just happens to be the arrangement of blue flowers sitting on a table near the back.
For once you’re thankful for all of the pre-written speeches that were shoved down your throat a week ago as you recite it like it’s the most natural thing to you. You make a note to send a thank you basket to your PR manager.
You finish your speech and go back to your seat. You feel awkward sitting at the table with your award placed in front of you. The night is only going to get worse. More speeches, more smiling, more standing. Shake this hand and greet this person and say these words and always make sure your dress isn’t bunched up. You feel like a puppet.
You do end up winning all of the awards you were nominated for and you have to go to a press conference afterward to show your gratitude for all of the support.
You don’t miss the looks the other idols shoot you. You don’t have to interpret what they mean. It’s been the same since your first successful album as a rookie. None of them believed in you and now that you’re levels above them they don’t want to talk to you. You don’t blame them.
At the end of the night you’re finally loaded into your car and you slip your shoes off of your feet in the car. You’re in your apartment for about two seconds before you unzip your dress and let it fall to the ground before moving to your room to change into something comfortable.
You undo your hair and clean off your makeup before sliding on a mask and slipping your hood over your head. You walk down the block to the convenience store on the corner and browse the sodas and chips before making a selection. You pay for your treats and are thankful the cashier doesn’t recognize you. It’s not that too hard to believe though. Sometimes you can’t even recognize yourself without your makeup.
A deep sigh escapes your mouth as you start to walk back home. Tonight should be one of the happiest nights for you, but here you are, alone, buying junk food from the convenience store, feeling miserable. You are grateful for your job, you really are, but it’s all so…exhausting.
Your feet still hurt from wearing your heels for so long so you find a bench to sit on and rest your feet for a moment. As you sit down everything starts to crash down on you. You place your head in your hands and start to silently cry.
You don’t know how long you’ve been there when you hear a voice address you. “Excuse me have you- oh, are you okay?” You look up to see a familiar face. “Y/N?”
You quickly wipe away your tears and straighten up though you know that Seungkwan has already seen it all. “I- I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? For what? Are you okay? What are you doing out here all alone? Why are you crying?”
“I’m sorry that you have to see me like this,” you say to Seungkwan. You’re embarrassed if you’re being honest. Out of everyone in the world to find you, it has to be Seungkwan.
He’s changed into street clothes and even through your distress you note how nice he looks. There’s always been something satisfying to you about idols in normal clothing. Maybe it’s because it makes them look like actual people.
“What are you doing here? It’s late and you’re all alone. Are you not celebrating your wins?”
“I…don’t have anyone to celebrate with,” you admit. “I don’t have many friends in the industry.”
“Well, you have me! We’re friends.” Seungkwan sits down on the bench next to you.
“Why are you here?” You change the subject.
“Ah, SEVENTEEN is celebrating our win at a bar nearby. I just needed a walk to clear my head for a moment,” Seungkwan explains. “Now, why are you crying on the street alone?”
You never knew if Seungkwan is as nice as he seems on camera, but apparently he is and it’s somehow making everything worse. You’re not sure if you want to just dump all of your problems on him at 1am on a random street right after crying when he should be celebrating with his group, but it’s not like you have anyone else to tell.
“I’m not sure what I’m even doing,” you finally say. “I’ve dreamed of this being my life since I was little, and now that I have it I feel…lost.”
“Lost?”
“I don’t know who I am anymore. I live my life day in and day out doing more or less the same thing, it’s like I’m on autopilot. This whole night I felt just like a doll, just something to play with and control. It’s exhausting.”
“You need to take time to take care of yourself. You’re going to burn yourself out if you keep doing all of the things you are now. You should spend time with friends or take a vacation,” Seungkwan says.
You laugh a bit incredulously. “Take a vacation? My manager would kill me. The next leg of my tour starts in two weeks and I’m filming ad collabs and working on my next album in the meantime,” you tell the other idol. You hope he understands a bit. “As for the friend one…I don’t have friends. Everyone is either too intimidated or too resentful to spend time with me. I’m one of the most successful idols in Korea, and I can’t even get someone to spend time with me.”
“Don’t say that. I’m your friend. I’m spending time with you right now, aren’t I?”
“Only because you found me crying alone. It’s pathetic I know. The media would have a field day with this if they saw me now.”
“That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t want to spend time with you in other situations. Honestly, all of SEVENTEEN would like to be your friend. You deserve to have people who care for you.” The words hit harder than you’re expecting and you feel your eyes start to well up with tears again. “Our jobs aren’t easy, but you’re is even harder than mine. You are so strong to do as much as you do, and all alone. I wouldn’t be able to do what I do without my members for support, and you deserve support as well.”
“Thank you, Seungkwan-ssi.” Your voice is soft, afraid that if you speak louder you might start sobbing.
“I think we can drop formalities,” Seungkwan says. “We’re friends now, remember.” You just nod.
It’s quiet between you two for a moment before you speak up. “Do you ever…wish your life was different? That you weren’t an idol?”
“This job is not for the weak of heart,” Seungkwan starts, “and sometimes it is hard, but I wouldn’t change a thing. Why? Do you…not want to be an idol anymore?”
“I’m not sure.” You take a moment to choose your words carefully. “I’m not happy. I love my fans and I love making everyone proud, but I don’t know if I’m being true to myself anymore.”
Seungkwan thinks over what you just said before responding slowly. “If you’re not happy anymore, then why do you keep doing it?”
“I’m too far in. I can’t be anyone else after the image I’ve built up. I don’t hate the job, I just…don’t feel anything anymore.”
“You should always choose yourself before anything else. I understand your feeling of obligation to this industry though. How about this? You come to me when you need support and I’ll be here for you and if you still feel like this later down the road, you have to promise me you’ll take a step back. You don’t have to quit, not yet, just take a break.”
You’ve truly never met someone like Boo Seungkwan. You can’t help but feel fondness towards him at this moment. No one has ever looked out for you the way Seungkwan is doing right now, and even just from this small conversation you’re starting to feel better. Maybe he is on to something with this support system he’s talking about.
“Okay Boo Seungkwan,” you say. “I think you might have yourself a deal.”
“Good. When your tour is done, I’ll show you what it’s like to spend time with a friend. We’ll do all of the funnest things I can think of and you’ll be able to relax. In the meantime, tell your manager to lessen your workload before you completely crash, or I’ll hunt him down and do it myself.” Seungkwan’s voice is dead serious and you know he’s not kidding.
“Thank you Seungkwan-ah, I don’t know how to repay you.”
“You don’t need to. That’s what friends are for.” And for the first time this whole night you crack genuine smile.
Seungkwan then stands. “Come on.” He holds his hand out for you to stand as well. “Join me and my members for tonight. You deserve to be celebrated as well.”
You tentatively take Seungkwan’s hand and he helps pull you to your feet before leading you back towards where his group is residing and you secretly smile to yourself about how things are already starting to look up.
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