#how the fuck are my uncles gonna lose their father and still bitch about the fact they can’t fly to Hawaii or have to wear a mask

[achaotichuman]

Warning, lengthy ACOTAR villain headcanon ramble ahead. Villain discussed: Ianthe and the Hybern Twins.

God I fucking hate how SJM turned Ianthe into a rapist, you're telling I can't make a hundred posts going on and on about my Ianthe and how this bad bitch absolutely was strutting the cat walk of running the world without anyone thinking twice about her because she's that fucking smart that she outwitted one of the most hyper-aware High Lords, all because Miss Maas decided she wanted to make all her female villains sex offenders because she doesn't know how to write them.

I'm going to anyway.

Also like, the twins were *definitely* possessed by Valgs right? Like, we can all see that? Right????

Come onnnnn, the potential story!!!! Dagdan and Brannagh hangin about the Hybern castle while Tamlin was there as a kid, and him ending up just following them around whenever his father dumps him and he's afraid of Amarantha or someone else finding him, and whelp, they're the only ones who haven't been mean to him so might as well follow em right?

And then the twins are like

Brannagh: "Uhm... want a beer?"

Dagdan: "HE'S FOUR"

Brannagh: "I DON'T KNOW WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH HIM???"

And then he just ends up hanging out with them every time he's there, like they're his cool cousins, and they teach him Hybern traditions and fighting techniques, and help horn his skill. Like Tamlin is wickedly observant and despite never wanting the crown, he is grade-A certified for the job, mans eliminated slavery without a single thought, that kind of ruling does take some knowledge. Yet, he's terrible with people. COME ON THE TWINS TRAINED HIM

"Oh but Asher, the incest"

No no no, they're aro/ace, and don't show any sexual attraction towards Ianthe, and Feyre, having the biggest crush on Ianthe, sees the twins not tryna jump her and immediately assumes incest. Which, is only half-relatable Fey fey. I get the whole crush part, but you jumped to conclusions a little there.

Back to the Valg possession theory. Imagine if the twins were like, "Hey uncle, what you're doin is a little uncool, we're gonna dip."

KoH: "..."

KoH: "Shove em in the Cauldron and see what happens."

Blah, blah, blah I didn't pay attention in TOG when they were explaining Valg demons, blah blah blah, possession, dark magic, etc etc

You get the idea.

(They were gonna dip and not help Prythian out at all, unless asked by Tamlin because they don't actually care. They just don't really want to hurt Tamlin)

Now the KoH has two obedient highly trained slaves that he wants to use, and Tamlin volunteers to have them at his Court, because when he went to Hybern, Tammy was like

"Omg, I could just get my cool cousins in spirit to help me out, they've always been there for me whenever I was in Hybern, surely they'd help out-... What? Oh their souls have been eaten and their just mindless demons now? Okay, cool.... *broken sobs cause more of his family is dead*,"

So now Tams got the twins at his place and he's also desperately trying to find a way to get them unpossessed cause he is absolutely not losing anyone else. And then boom, Feyre and Lucien kill them, they both dip, Ianthe's later killed and oh no, now all his family is dead or has left him. That was counter-productive.

Basically, I am describing the biggest angst fic ever. Ianthe, being not a rapist, but the baddest bitch in Prythian who is holding all the strings, she's got a list... of all the people that once double crossed her, she's checking it twice... to see which ones she wants to kill immediately and which ones she wants to have publicly tortured. She's using her friendship with Tamlin as a means to manipulate him and prop herself up to get close to the Cauldron so she can use it.

This fic would also absolutely have a scene of Tamlin on his knees sobbing and begging the twins to come back because goddamnit he fucking needs them, and know they're still in there, and they're just not but he can't accept it.

I also feel like Ianthe would enlist the twins (and probably Jurian) as her evil little henchmen. Jurian just here cause he likes making fun of Ianthe when Feyre is inevitably fucking everything up, but not in the cool protagonist fucks up the evil villains plan way, no, Feyre is just being unhinged and Ianthe can't deal with this, and Jurian is NO HELP

There'd be a scene where Ianthe angrily throws her robes on the floor screaming "I QUIT, I QUIT, I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE" and storms off. Jurian picks it up and puts it on and pretends to be her, and Ianthe runs back to snatch it off him.

Ofc remove all the sexual predatory behaviour (Ianthe might be a villain, but she is the High Priestess and she has to be an example, afterall she wants all this power because she believes the Priestesses should be in charge of everything)

Like, Ianthe is just this unbelievably strong-willed, intelligent and powerful person, then you also have Lucien, who is... the exact same, just minus all of the evil. DO NOT TELL ME THEY WOULDNT SASS EACH OTHER TO HECK AND BACK

Tamlin turns his back for five seconds and they are snapping. Dramatically tossing their hair at each other, the doors are being slammed like a teenager releasing their pubescent angst.

Also, Ianthe x Elain, come on.

In summary, I have a massive crush on Ianthe, and I think the twins could have *so cool*

This is my entirely unedited thoughts on this subjects, it is late, and I sleepy. If you made it to the end of this, you get a little gold star.

[cultofdixon]

Tough Love

Daryl Dixon [PLATONIC] • They/Them Pronouns [Non-Binary - AFAB] • Life hasn’t been that kind to you. Like having Merle Dixon as your biological father. And Daryl Dixon not stepping in when he should’ve. But then the end of the world happened…and everything is changing • ANGST/SFW • TW: Canon Violence / Slurs [cuz Merle is a bitch] / Self Harm Scars / Self Harm / Scars / Domestic Abuse / Abandonment Issues / Coming Out / Past Attempt Mentioned / Injuries • Fuckton of Flashbacks

Requested by: @monootakuu

“What in the fucking hell is that, Merle”

“Are you that fucking stupid? It’s a baby”

“NO SHIT BUT HOWD YEA GET IT”

“ITS MINE DIPSHIT”

Daryl frowns as he couldn’t believe it. His brother is that fucking stupid to knock somebody up.

“This is all you, Merle.”

“You ain’t gonna help me?”

“I’m not the one that knocked up a fucking hooker. For once in your life, take responsibility and try not to fuck every woman that stands. Or there will be more mini Merle’s that infest the earth” Daryl snaps at his brother grabbing his jacket and leaving the trailer, with the extra emphasize of how he feels with slamming the trailer door making the little baby violently sob.

“You little—“ Merle glares in the direction Daryl left before taking the baby out of the car seat it came in. “Shut it you little ass kicker”

________

“Hurry up kid” Merle snaps continuing to lead the way on the hunt as Y/N stood up from checking a batch of mushrooms to catch up to their old man.

Daryl walks beside his brother glancing back and every now and then to find Y/N staring at their feet but still right behind them.

“I can show yea which mushrooms you can eat or not”

“Or not.” Y/N frowns. “I’ve got my book…I don’t need your help” they sigh opening said nature book they stole from their school library before the end of the world happened.

The two heard the thud and scream from behind them seeing Y/N now hanging upside down by the ankle. They struggled with the trap trying to bend enough to use their knife to cut them down but they were starting to get frustrated. Daryl was about to cut them down when he noticed Merle ready his weapon to the footsteps approaching.

“Somethin’ triggered the trap finally” One of the two announced but as they approached to notice the two hunters staring back with the crossbow and hunting rifle at the ready. “Oh. Shit but it’s—-“ he looks up seeing the human being that got caught. “Well shit.”

“Do you even know how to set fucking traps like that? Some part of it is supposed to be visible to hunters” Daryl snaps at the two watching them tense.

“We’re not hunters, we are just trying to feed our camp and we can only use so much of the forage”

“But. Given y’all are hunters. Maybe we can come up with something”

“You’re really gonna ask us for some kind of fucking deal when you almost killed our kid?”

“Said kid would like to be fucking let DOWN” Y/N yells off the top of their lungs not giving a damn about what else could be walking the forest. Daryl was about to do it gently until Merle pushed past him with his hunting knife in hand, striking the rope causing his kid to hit the ground hard.

“MERLE”

“What? They’ll fucking walk it off” Merle scoffs approaching the two strangers. “So a deal?”

Daryl glares at the back of his brother’s head holding his hand out for Y/N as they kept to the ground for a moment which lead to him kneeling to their side.

“What hurts kid?”

“Like he said I’ll just walk it off…” Y/N sighs swatting their uncle’s hand away and getting up from the hard ground picking up their book along the way.

________

Daryl frowns watching Merle ignore his toddler that was more interested in him and what he was doing at. But what the man was doing was preparing his crystal deliveries.

“Don’t let her ingest some of that Merle. Or you’ll lose your kid”

“I ain’t letting her anywhere—-HEY!” Merle suddenly pushed his kid over with his foot causing his brother to get up from the kitchen table to check on her. But the kid sprung back up like it was nothing. “You’re in time out. GO!” He points to the corner and the small child knew where to go.

“You’re a monster, Merle”

“No. The monster is that devil spawn’s mother that locked her legs around my torso” Merle snaps crushing a piece of the meth grabbing his pipe about to light it when Daryl grabbed the spray bottle he uses on his kid. “Don’t you fucking dare”

“Smoke outside if you really want to be a douchebag. Don’t hurt your kid even more than you already have”

________

“You are staying here” Merle states to Y/N who is more than capable to take care of themselves on a run like this one. But given the anger in his tone, Y/N didn’t even bother trying to fight.

“Just stay safe old man” They sigh going to their campsite within a campsite more toward the can boarder to alert of walkers.

“Daryl” The eldest yells at his brother to get his attention from Dale who he was informing about a possible hunting ground. Daryl approaches the small run party looking at his brother confused. “Keep an eye on’em.”

“If they want to join the hunt, they will. Otherwise, there’s other people to keep an eye on them just in case of anything” Daryl reassures his brother even if it didn’t really mean much.

Y/N didn’t go with Daryl to hunt this deer he’s been tracking for a while. Didn’t even leave the tent for the first hour, just reading the foraging books that were stolen by Merle as an attempt to bond with his kid. But failed when they discovered he stole them.

“Y/N? Honey?”

The teen quickly shot up to the voice taking a second to remember that it’s not just the Dixon’s anymore.

“Who is it?”

“Lori, was wondering if you wanna come with the ladies and kids down to the lake. You don’t have to do laundry but just get out of the campsite” Lori patiently waited for a few minutes as she was about to leave thinking she asked too much but saw the tent open with Y/N stepping out with their backpack on. “Got everything?” She gave them a smile watching them nod before leading the way for them.

Soon Y/N found themselves watching two kids splashing each other in the lake while they assumed their mothers and the other women at the camp did the laundry. They watched the ripples in the water for a while and only thought about how they couldn’t swim.

Honestly liked the moment without their dad and uncle

The children stopped splashing when they noticed Y/N stepping into the water after rolling up their pants and grabbing a few pebbles. They started to skip the rocks along the water and the two were intrigued.

Lori gently elbows Carol for her attention before directing with her eyes. Both watching Y/N teach their kids how to skip rocks. Sophia accidentally hitting Y/N in the back of the head with a pebble resulting in the two rising to their feet not knowing how they’ll react. But the slow turn with a serious look resulted in a smile and the teen suddenly splashing the kid with the water. The giggling broke out for all three of them making the moms relax and admire the happiness they all now rarely see.

“Yea sure?” Dale questions Y/N as they offered to take one of the night watches with their uncle’s hunting rifle that he’s never used.

“Yeah I’m not sleepy so”

“Okay, only for a couple hours. Then I’ll be up”

Y/N shot him a thumbs up before climbing up the RV and taking a seat on the lawn chair. They watch their surroundings for a while, inevitably falling into a leaning position staring up at the night sky…enjoying all the stars in the sky…part of them couldn’t believe they were loving a moment without their dad.

He just…never seemed to care.

________

The thirteen year old strutted out of the hospital still wearing their gown over their tshirt and shorts with the grippy socks and all. Y/N stopped at the end of the walkway seeing Daryl leaning up against Merle’s truck but no Merle. Their shoulders slumped and the frown remained as they approach their uncle.

“Where’s the old man?”

“Jail. Again.” Daryl frowns, his eyes glued to the bandaging on their wrists. “Got called by the cops about bailing him out and when I got there, your dad just. Magically remembered that today was your release day…which I didn’t know anything about and I fucking live with y’all…so I left him there and waited in this parking lot until you got out”

“You didn’t have to…they probably would’ve LOVED to hear me talk about my hooker mom that I never met and deadbeat dad that uses me as a drug rat in my school for more money.”

“Did you actually—-“

“Not the drug rat part. Just enough for them to let me leave…” They frown dropping their shoes that had the shoelaces pulled out so that they can slip them on. “Can you re-lace them for me when we get home?”

“Mhm” Daryl really couldn’t pull his eyes from the obvious as Y/N felt the words get stuck about addressing it.

“You think Dad would’ve…actually come and pick me up?”

“Honest?”

“Prefer it…”

“Probably not” Daryl frowns extending his hand to take their bag and toss it into the bed of the truck turning back to the kid seeing the glued stare of theirs. “I don’t wanna ask if you’re not okay to talk about it”

“It wasn’t even dad who found me…just one of his hook ups. You were on that road trip on your bike. Paramedics couldn’t reach yea and reached…Merle who didn’t hesitate to get me committed. The kitchen isn’t going to look pretty when we get home…I’ll cle—-“

“I’ll clean it up. Just…please talk to me if you need somebody.” Daryl felt the ache in his chest hearing all of that coming from them as he couldn’t help but pull them into his embrace. “You’re my family too, and I’m sorry for being a bitch too most of your life”

Y/N brought their arms around him not understanding the full extent of hugging but the safe feeling they got from it…made them hold on longer.

________

“You—-DO YOU HAVE ANY FUCKING IDEA WHO YOU’RE AFFECTIN’ HERE?!” Daryl snaps at the sheriff in front of him feeling Shane push him back to avoid any physical altercation.

“Just you I’m assumin’” Rick held his hands up defensively but those words caused a lot of looks in his direction. “Now what am I missing here?!”

“Rick, honey, Merle is—-“

“What is Uncle Daryl yelling?” Y/N joins the party wearing one of Merle’s tan button downs over their long sleeves as the similar shirt is what caught Rick’s attention.

They’re too young to be a lover—-well. Everybody’s seen Merle right? Rick thought but then instantly received whiplash of the word “uncle” that came from their mouth realizing he just handcuffed someone’s father to a roof and left him there. “Shit. I—-“

“Y/N, he didn’t mean to” Shane tried to cover for his best friend as Daryl shoved the other cop off of him going to his confused kid.

“Something happened to Merle”

Y/N frowns instantly as the words left behind were the only ones that stuck out in Daryl’s explanation but before he could get riled up again. The fifteen year old made their way toward’s Rick and his guilt expression before suddenly having their fist meet his face without a second thought. Rick went down instantly and scrambled a bit confused on how much strength that teenager carried as the confused turned to anger and then sorrow within seconds. Lori didn’t bother getting involved, nor did Shane or Daryl. Rick instantly knew that he deserved it for the decision he made even if Merle is who he is.

“Look…I’m—-“

“Shut the fuck up, pig” Y/N kicked the dirt at him before storming off wiping the tears away on their way back to their tent.

“You’re not gonna fight him too right? Cuz we’ll knock your ass down” Shane tells Daryl who shot him a glare.

“The kid said enough for the both of us” Daryl frowns leaving to talk to Y/N before even talking to the retired sheriff how they’re going to get his brother back.

His anxiety got the best of him when he opened their tent seeing Y/N fiddling with their knife. But the action was stopped when he entered, to avoid his assumptions.

“Is he dead?”

“Dunno”

“Are we going to go get him?”

“I will go get him. With some of those fucks by the looks of it.”

“Why won’t you let me go”

“Because if shit hits the fan, you ain’t getting yourself killed.”

“And lose you too? Fucking think for once Uncle Daryl.” Y/N frowns picking up their knife and putting it in its sheath pushing past him.

________

“You’re seriously leavin’? For how long?”

“Just for a week. Why the fuck does that matter to you?”

“Who’s gonna help me and Y/N—-“

“No. I’ve told yea. Countless times. Not to take Y/N on these runs. Your buyers can wait and this Jesse dude? Will get his money later” Daryl picks up his bag looking at the oblivious but happy six year old sitting at the coffee table fiddling with a plush bear he’s never seen before. “Did you steal that?”

“Isn’t stealing bad?”

“Na—-“

“Yes. Don’t listen to your old man. And don’t go to sketchy places with him either.”

“Who gonna watch me?” Y/N frowns looking up at her uncle as Merle gave him more of an amused one. They both can be jerks.

“Your dealer…can fucking wait another day” Daryl snaps at his brother slamming the door on his way out resulting in the kid flinching.

Merle turns to his kid thinking what would happen if he left her at home but then he wouldn’t hear the end of it from Daryl if he came home before him.

“You win this round, kid”

________

“Y/N! Y/N!” Daryl yells off the top of his lungs taking out every walker in sight growing anxious the more screaming he heard from these people.

A loud whistle rang through as the archer quickly drew his attention to the RV finding Y/N on the ladder after they had taken a few sickos out to get there to grab their uncle attention.

Once the threat was taken care of, Daryl quickly went to his kid checking their person finding the whistle around their neck. It’s a dumb otter shape whistle that he bought when both Merle and him lost Y/N in a zoo. Of course they would be a wanderer. Y/N snapped in his face to get his attention back as he did another check of their person only to get punched in the shoulder.

“You bit?!”

“No! You find dad?”

“No…found something of him but I don’t think you wanna know”

You’re right. I don’t. Y/N frowns watching the sobbing display happening around them as a part of them started to feel guilty for liking the time without their dad around.

But they couldn’t help it. With a father like that, why would you want to be around them?

________

Merle carried his plastic bag of belongings out of the prison to be greeted with his truck and his brother’s enraged expression.

“Where the fuck is the rugrat?”

“At home. With a babysitter”

“Wow how the fuck did yea—-“ Merle was suddenly cut off by Daryl punching him right in the jaw making him stumble to the ground. “Hey what gives?”

“YOUR FUCKING KID GOT A HOLD OF YOUR STASH AND ALMOST DIED” Daryl snaps not giving a damn of the curious guard watching the interaction. “If you don’t do fucking better. CPS will take her”

“So? She’d be somewhere fucking better”

Daryl frowns about to kick Merle’s ass when it clicked to him.

“If you wanted to be a goddamn father so much, why didn’t you take the responsibility from me?”

________

Daryl blames a lot of Y/N’s childhood on himself. He should’ve been more present then a lot of the mistakes that occurred wouldn’t have happened.

Her overdosing on her father’s supply, making him lose temporary custody of her.

They’re coming out resulting in a few profanities thrown and Merle expressing his very conservative side. Inevitably having them run away until they realized three days in a drug addict’s apartment is better than a park bench.

The attempt during a time where the only one who understands responsibility wasn’t there…to a relapse that he wish didn’t happen

Amongst a whole lot of other things…Daryl really wanted to give them a life they wanted even when the world ended.

But the universe keeps on taking…

“You followed one of my men” This unknown voice didn’t freak out Y/N entirely. They’ve been in these situations way too often in the world before. Mostly watching their dad get the shit beat out of him by an angry drug lord’s goons. “How did you even manage to catch up? He was in a car and when you got caught. You were on foot”

“Could’ve been a track star if god gave me more of a nuclear family instead of one idiot being my dad and the other being an absent family member half the time” Y/N kicked their feet amused as their hands were straining to the rope. The footsteps drew closer but stopped where they couldn’t turn around to see who it was.

“Where did y’all come from? Where’s your camp?”

“Gonna take a whole lot for me to just roll over, buddy”

The voice sighed before approaching the door to the room they were in and opening it. Letting another set of unknown footsteps bring themselves in. Y/N couldn’t make out the hushed whispers.

But the flinch Merle experienced about to land a punch on Glenn, made him stop trying to get answers out of the guy. All he did was listening to the screaming that both knew wasn’t Maggie.

“Who followed yea”

“What?”

“ANSWER ME” Merle snaps at Glenn instead of throwing punches as he didn’t reply right away but given the look in his eyes.

The Governor watched as his right hand stepped out with a rage filled expression about to deck the man beside him that had bloodied knuckles.

“Who else did y’all find?”

“Why does that matter? Did you get anything out of the guy?”

“No—Now answer—“

“Just some teenager that was with them. They weren’t giving answers so boss man had me work my magic” The brute laughs slightly as the Governor noticed Merle’s tense composure and clenched fist.

“You said your brother is a part of this group. After recognizing the guy”

“So?”

“Do you know the girl?”

“No, but I was about to—-“

“I’ll go talk to the girl…you talk to your kid” The Governor pats Merle’s shoulder, heading back inside with the other.

Leaving Merle to find himself standing outside the door where his kid, his fucking blood that they beat to get answers out of, sat waiting and not knowing what is happening to their friends.

The door opening caused Y/N to flinch in their fetal position lifting their head to look at the door but that was difficult given their left eye swollen shut and the other they didn’t want to open at all.

“What hurts”

Y/N couldn’t help the painful laugh to escape their bruised throat. They uncomfortably turned their body to the other side even if it meant laying on more broken ribs.

“Kid. What. Hurts.” Merle yells causing them to flinch once more but also him retract a bit. “Y/N…I ain’t asking anything else. Not asking about your camp. Daryl. Nothing. Just you”

“Now? N-NOW?!” Y/N snaps wincing when they raised their voice, struggling to sit up as Merle took note of the pain they were experiencing in their wrists and legs when getting up. “Why is it now that you fucking care?!”

“Y/N—-“

“Just cuz you got your goddamn hand cut off doesn’t mean you just fucking book it. Or not even bother to go and find your goddamn kid.” Y/N stopped to spit up some blood making Merle grow anxious as he tried stepping close but they stepped back. “I knew you never gave a fucking damn about me. You only cared when I was smaller or when I was your goddamn pack mule—-I SHOULDVE JUST BEEN YOUR KID. NOT YOUR GODDAMN HELP” they dropped on that last note feeling the pain get the best of them as the tears came on. “What I learned from yea…helps me now…never helped me then…do you even remember the good years? Where you were actually a dad?”

“I never wanted you” Merle finally admits the one thing, Y/N has been begging him since they knew better for him to straight up say. But the pain started to become unbearable as he spoke. “Daryl reminded me everyday how terrible of a father I was. How I was like your grandpa. Be thankful you never met the fuck”

“I’ll send a postcard to hell” Y/N curls up a bit hunched over. “What the fuck are you getting—-“

“Doesn’t mean I didn’t love yea. I never wanted you. But you were the best thing to happen, next to leaving my old man’s place to escape his abuse. The only reason you came out with a heart wasn’t because of me.” Merle frowns kneeling to his kid’s level checking their person with his eyes knowing if he tried to touch they’d lash out. “But because of Daryl. When I was in prison for the four years you can barely remember, he raised yea. He took yea to school. Got you what you wanted the right way. He told the social worker the day you OD’d, that he would take custody of yea”

The tears running down their face were turning into more of a mix. The pain…and the pain caused by the blur of those four years that they couldn’t accept because of all the agony caused in all the others.

“Dad…I wanna go home” Y/N begs reaching out to him as Merle carefully took them into his arms quickly breaking the knife off the other so that he could carry his kid out of there when the moment was right.

But the group was already going to rescue them.

When Merle stepped out carrying Y/N in his arms feeling their grip weaken, he was stopped by both Maggie and Glenn aiming the stolen weapons at the man. Maggie was confused about the two being together but that was a story for later, and Merle turned to Glenn who instantly knew what was happening.

“You follow me and I’ll help yea out of here. As long as you take them”

“Deal. But you can’t follow us”

“No shit. I don’t like yea…but I know they mean something to all of yea.” Merle states handing Y/N off as they suddenly grabbed a fist full of his shirt staring him down. “This is for your safety and your groups. Now follow me”

Merle got the three out, but also ran into the others. Who wants to kill Merle is pretty much what was happening as everyone wanted a piece of the man except those he shares blood with. For the most part. Glenn and Maggie protested against having the eldest Dixon stay with them at the prison, but given he lead them out of there and that he didn’t go through with prying it out of Glenn…they bent. But only if he listened to them and helped them work with Woodbury or get rid of the threat.

“They alright?”

“They passed out after the adrenaline wore off. Should be fine as long as they don’t move for a while” Hershel checked their pulse for the third time since returning to the prison before getting up to leave the cell room when both Dixon brothers stared intensely at the doc. “If the bruising on their side from the broken ribs gets worse, I’ll have to relieve it with what I’ve got”

“Could steal medical supplies from Woodbury”

“You’re a fugitive” Daryl frowns. “Need to find somethin’ now to take care of it”

“Y’all can’t do anything to save them if we have a target on our backs” Rick interrupts the two for only a second but clearly their attention wasn’t going to be taken unless something more major happens. “Merle. Think you can map out Woodbury of its weak—-“

“I’ll give yea whatever the fuck you want if it means you’d leave me alone for goddamn five minutes” Merle snaps leaving with Rick to take care of business as Hershel steps out to grab a few things for Y/N, ultimately leaving Daryl alone with them.

As Daryl sat beside Y/N’s bedside in place of Hershel, he watches them stir a bit from discomfort making him tug the blanket to cover them more and resting the back of his hand on their forehead.

“M’not hot”

“Just double checkin’.”

“Ain’t no doc…” Y/N flinched to the sound of Daryl’s chair moving when all he wanted was to bring it closer. “Dad didn’t do it…”

“He’s told me who fucking did it, and he ain’t livin’ for much longer” Daryl states watching Y/N fall back asleep as that moment Rick came back needing his input on the plan.

Talking to the Governor is full proof. Being civil about it before taking matters into your own hands. Or Merle’s. Daryl left with Rick and a few others for the meeting with the Governor. Merle decided to take that opportunity to steal medical supplies from his old community for Y/N and extra for the hell of it. Michonne followed Merle to get answers of her own but also make sure he wasn’t leaving to tell anybody anything.

They will be okay. They will be okay. Merle frowns getting everything they will possibly need as his thoughts and actions were interrupted by the door springing open.

The swordsman quickly drew her katana when Merle drew his knife. The two relaxed realizing who it was but given Michonne’s issue with the guy, she kept an eye on him.

“I heard stories”

“So?”

“You think you can do all of this to redeem yourself for the pain you inflicted on this group? Let alone your own child”

“They’re practically an adult, I’m not doing this shit for anybody else but my kid, and I’m not looking for a fucking award” Merle snaps filling the duffle with anything and everything in the medical ward. The unexpected thing was Michonne receiving the duffle. “And I ain’t letting that bastard live”

Michonne returns. No Merle. Daryl leaves in search for Merle while the group in the prison prepares for an attack.

Hershel checks Y/N once more when they were moved in a secure area that won’t be affected by the attack. He notices their eyes following his movements and thought something was going on physically but once he stopped checking their bruising, they sighed.

“How are you feeling?”

“Useless…”

“You are hurt, the others don’t want yea risking further injury”

“Yknow…when my dad was missing…I was kind of relieved.” Y/N frowns fiddling with the buttons on their shirt. “Not like…I didn’t have the freedom when he was around…least I didn’t have to hear him bitch when I did shit…”

The doc took their wrist to check their pulse like he’s been doing every hour but also listening to their rambling that he thought was them reaching unconsciousness again. But they kept on.

“Now he’s back…yea think he gonna leave again?”

“When I was an alcoholic…the first time around, I’d disappear to avoid disappointing my family. Yeah to the local watering hole but didn’t want to hurt Maggie and Beth with my presence…” Hershel sets their arm down bringing the blanket back to cover them. “But it hurt them more not to have me there for’em. I don’t know your dad. Or your uncle for that matter. Besides that both would do anything for yea…I doubt they’re gonna leave in any way.”

The reassurance was needed.

Again.

And again.

Y/N watches from the entrance to their cellblock as Rick helps direct Woodbury folk out of the bus they took. Daryl quietly approaches their side sitting on the steps with them as they kept their gaze away from him after hearing the news. Recklessness was definitely a Dixon thing. Except only two out of the three know how to save themselves.

“We don’t have to talk about it”

“Good. I don’t want to”

Daryl frowns wanting to find the right words then remembered what he found on Merle’s body and got up for a second to retrieve it from his bike. When he returned, Y/N watches as the photo comes into their view taking it from their uncle’s extended hand.

“Your old man never left without that. Even when we both thought he was the worse father anybody could have” Daryl returns to his seat right beside them. “You were a pain as a baby. Found myself sleeping in the truck to leave Merle to take care of you. But when I came back one morning, you were sound asleep on him. So I took that for him. Thought he didn’t like it. Found it on his person when…he died.”

Y/N continues to stare at the photo letting the achey feeling in their chest get worse and ultimately make the tears roll off their cheeks.

“That son of a bitch…”

[corneliathekate]

Why does every Evil Shanks Theory sound like a bad callout post? Spoilers under the cut so idk, if this happens to spread, you're protected.

"Why would he meet with the Gorosei??? Sus???"

Bro, maybe the one Yonko that isn't a Capital Letter War Criminal has some interest in maintaining balance? And as far as diplomacy with the enemy, this man straight up BDE'd his way onto Whitebeard's ship to tell him to mind his own business. They're not friends. Same with Marineford. He's got a habit of trying to stop fights.

"Well, his brother/father/uncle/moon man cousin, that guy's a Celestial Dragon, and he might be one! He's gotta be evil!"

You right, dude, in fact, I'm gonna let you continue and tell me how many people in this bitch are defined by their shitass biological family and not the people that love them. Go ahead. I'll wait.

"Why did he give up his arm for Luffy? If he says he bet it on a new generation, doesn't that mean he chose to do it? Pretty manipulative???"

Narrative. Eat my ass. Also I'll explain this in-world in a bit, give me a second.

"Why'd he have the Nika-Nika Fruit??? Why didn't he tell Luffy all about it???"

Would you tell the kid that stabbed himself in the face that he just got an all-powerful fruit that makes him God if he dies? 5 year old Luffy was already gonna cowabunga into the nearest bottomless pit to see how high he can bounce, let's not make it worse. The most you'll get is him deciding it's a mystery fruit. And as for why he had it, if he has it, that means the Government doesn't have it. If he was working for them, wouldn't he have it under lock and key and not stop to bone ram Makino and stay for a vacation?

"Well he can't be all that good, he abandoned the One Piece! He betrayed what Roger and Buggy believed in him!"

Bro, sue me for this, but if everybody's gonna suck Buggy's detachable dick for deciding to try to be the King, that means he didn't want to be for a longass time. Despite the power scaling, Shanks is still human. Just as human as his clown ex-boyfriend. You lose your dad in a public execution and see what the world will say about him for the next 20 years and tell me you feel like slapping Kaido or Whitebeard when you're (at the time) half the Him that Roger was. And this ties back to losing his arm. He's a fucking human being. Haki takes concentration and control. And Shanks, emotional wreck he was, wasn't exactly in his top game when Luffy got thrown into the sea. By that point, he was ready to risk everything for Luffy. Whether you believe he's been looking for the real Joyboy or not, he obviously loved that kid. He had his own kid by then, no wonder he dropped everything for this child that reminded him so much of the greatest man he ever knew.

Anyways. I like to think Shanks is who we want him to be, but I could be wrong by the end of the story. Shanks may end up being the disappointment Buggy decided he was. I just think it's funny that we're trying to define the morality of a pirate emperor in the first place like there's an easy answer here. Shit's complicated. He's doubly divorced, never married, and is likely racking up biological/adoptive kids like pool balls. I don't think there's a clear way to define him or his relationships with anybody.

[yikesola]

-_-

[xoxo-teddybear]

Heyo! I'm a REALLY REALLY REALLY! Big fan of angst and your works, so I have a suggestion! So like, in this au Bakugou and Y/N are aged up and they have a daughter (let's just say her name is either Katsumi or Kirumi). So, the child is 4 years old and she didn't get her quirk yet. Let's just say Bakugou got drunk when his friends dragged him to a bar and this woman decided to hit him up and let's just say he cheated- so Y/N found out because kiri just had to tell her because it wasn't manly at all for him to keep a secret and Y/N left him with his child and boom! Bad ending. Please tag me in this one tyy!

Bet.

(Changed it up the slightest bit to make Katsumi remember bc I kinda wanna do a part 2 for this)

Nobody to Blame but Yourself - Bakugou Katsuki

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: ANGST, cursing, cheating, alcohol consumption

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Pt.1 Pt.2

You have a small, beautiful family. Your loving husband, Katsuki and your adorable daughter, 5 year old Katsumi.

Katsumi was your precious baby girl. She had Katsuki’s ash blonde hair with your silky smooth hair texture. She had your E/C eyes and Katsuki’s porcelain skin. She had Katsuki’s bravery and boldness along with your kindness and compassion. She was a perfect mix of you both.

Y/N and Katsuki have been together ever since their childhood. Their families were close and they grew up together. Katsuki always swore to protect his princess. They got together in their junior year and about 5 years after they graduated from UA high, Katsuki proposed.

—

—

“Be back soon, okay Suki?” You sweetly said to your husband as he got closer to the door. He pulled you in with a smile and pecked your cheek.

“Yeah, yeah Teddy Bear. I’ll probably be back sooner than you think, don’t even wanna go with those losers.” He complained with a strained face. You giggled at his expression and went on.

“Those losers have been your best friends since high school. You love them. You know you do,” you teased. “Besides, you haven’t spent some time with them in forever.”

“Yeah Y/N. I’m a husband and a dad. I don’t need to be around my friends, I need to be with my family.” He exclaimed with a playful voice.

“Well your family will still be here when you get back. Just as long as you always come back to us too.” You said with a wink.

“Always will Teddy Bear.” He said holding you tight. He held you close until you both heard the little pitter patter of feet running to the front door. You both looked down and saw your daughter in her pjs and watched as she jumped onto Katsuki.

“Be back soon daddy!” She said with a squeal. Katsumi was definitely a daddy’s girl. Her and her father were attached at the hip the second she was born. They were best friends and you loved their father-daughter dynamic.

“Katsumi, you’re supposed to be sleeping, love.” You said with a chuckled as you held her tiny hand while Katsuki picked her up in his arms.

“I wanted to say bye to daddy before he went to see uncle Kiri! And uncle Denki and uncle Sero and Auntie Mina!” She said and watched as you and Bakugou lip synced to her voice as she said the Bakusquad’s names. She laughed at her parent’s teasing as Katsuki assaulted her in kisses.

“That’s sweet baby bear. Don’t worry. I’ll be back soon. So get to bed you brat,” Bakugou said as he placed his daughter down and ruffled her hair. Others would look down on the rough treatment but you knew Katsumi never took it seriously. She always laughed and played back with Katsuki whenever he put on his ‘mean guy act.’

“M’kay.” Katsuki bent down to kiss her cheek and you followed doing the same action before Katsumi ran back off to her room. You and Katsuki said bye to each other after Katsuki gave you a loving kiss. He walked out the door to meet with his friends as he knew he was in for a long night.

It would soon shock him to see how true that statement would be.

—

The night was going well. Katsuki left around 8:30 and he said he would be back sooner than you thought so considering he was now a family man, you thought he’d be back by midnight. However, you woke up in the middle of the night and saw it was 3 in the morning...and he still wasn’t home. You were starting to get worried now.

If this was back in your earlier years of marriage, you’d say this was okay. Not great but okay, except now, Katsuki has responsibilities and promises that he vowed to keep. He should’ve been home a long time ago. Where was he? You stayed up deciding to sit and wait for him to come home and after almost 2 hours, your phone rang.

You picked it up quickly with a little bit of fear and anger sitting in your stomach. You didn’t even bother to check who it was so when you heard the voice of your husband’s best friend instead of Katsuki, you grew concerned.

“Katsuki! Where are you?!” You asked with worry as you slightly shouted into the phone.

“Hey Y/N..... It’s Kirishima. Umm...I have something to tell you.” He said with sadness detected in his voice.

“Kiri? Is everything alright? Wheres Katsuki?” You asked.

“I’m so sorry Y/N...”

Listening to the red head’s voice made your eyes pop. Your body trembled and tears began to pool in your eyes as you shook your head in denial. Katsuki loved you. You both had a daughter! A family! He would never....he wouldn’t....right? After talking to your friend for some time and getting the crucial information you needed, you made up your mind on what you had to do.

“T-Thank you, Kirishima. Goodnight.” You said into the phone with a hiccup.

“I’m sorry Y/N. You don’t deserve this. You and Katsumi....goodnight.” He said and hung up the phone. You placed it down and sat in silence for a moment. After about a minute, you broke down again and cried into your hands. You sobbed as tears flowed down your cheeks. Rivers of heartbreak and anger streamed down your face as you cried the night away.

Well..you couldn’t cry all night. Katsuki would probably be back in the morning and you had plans. You’d have to save your tears for later. You looked at the time.

4:18 a.m.

You set your alarm for 6 and went back to bed. The whole night, all you could think about was your precious baby girl. This was going to break her little heart. Instead of crying over your husband’s betrayal, you wept for your daughter’s future without her best friend. Eventually you cried yourself to sleep and the sun rose in time.

—

10:00 a.m

Katsuki opened his eyes to the alarm on the nightstand. He yawned a bit before adjusting his eyes to morning light. The more he looked at the stand, the more he realized he didn’t recognize it. Nor the alarm clock. He looked around and noticed he wasn’t in his bedroom. Katsuki shot up and sat on the bed and looked down to notice he was completely undressed. He looked to the side and saw some random woman. A complete stranger who was also naked in bed with him. His heart grew rapid as his eyes grew frantic.

“No, no, no, no, no, no this can’t be happening..this can’t be happening!” Katsuki said as his hands found way to his hair as he tugged on the blonde locks. The woman next to him awoken to his shuffling and smiled up at him. She placed her hand on his bare chest and cuddled in close to him as she sighed in content.

“G’morning handsome. Had a fun night?” She teased, reminding him of his affair and unloyal actions.

“Get the fuck off me!” He said as he jumped out of bed and found his pants. He pulled them on and continued to scream. “What the fuck is wrong with you?! The hell did you do to me you fucking slut?”

“What’re you talking about? And who the fuck are you calling a slut?” The woman said with sass.

“Just tell me where I am!” Katsuki demanded.

“A hotel! You know, the hotel you dragged me to so you could get your dick wet.” She said as she sat up from the bed but still covered herself with the blanket.

“Why the fuck would I do that?!” He screamed.

“You tell me. All I know is that I saw you in that bar, you drank a hell of a lot with your friends, I came up to you and flirted with you, you flirted back, we shared a few more drinks, and you dragged me here. I mean, I consented of course but still.” The stranger explained. Bakugou shook as he looked around in a frenzy. “Anyway, round 2?”

“You fucking bitch, I have a wife!” He screamed at her as he got himself dressed.

“Heh, wow. Well when your wife leaves you after she finds out you cheated, give me a call.” The woman said as she layed back down on the bed. Katsuki seethed at her as he squinted his eyes in disgust.

“You shameless slut. Like hell I will! And Y/N’s not gonna leave me! She loves me! And I love her-“

“Sure didn’t seem like it last night~” the woman said. Bakugou had enough and blasted the bed she was on with his quirk before cussing her out and leaving her there. He quickly ran out the hotel and found his car. He hopped inside and started it as he quickly sped off home.

“Shit!” Bakugou screamed at himself. How could he do that?! How could he cheat on you?! You were his everything! You and Katsumi! His two girls were his entire world! And he betrayed the both of you by doing this. He could only hope that you wouldn’t find out. He can’t tell you what he did. He would lose you! He can’t lost you! This whole thing just has to pass over and things will be fine. Right? Well something didn’t sit right with him as he inched closer and closer to his house.

—

When the 6 o’clock alarm rang, you woke up, ready for the day to begin and the drama to unfold. You were quick to get yourself ready. Brush your teeth, shower, get dressed, a little makeup, and you packed your important belongings and your clothes. Everything else would be replaceable. You put on a pair of shoes and put the rest in the large suitcase you had.

You made a quick call to Mina, assuming she already knew what happened. You asked if you could drop Katsumi off for some time and she of course said yes. After saying ‘thank you,’ you brought all your bags into your car and went back inside to get your daughter.

You walked into your daughter’s bedroom to see her sleeping peacefully. Next to her bed, a framed picture of your once happy family. It was Katsumi’s 4th birthday and she didn’t want to spend it with anybody else except for Mommy and Daddy. Now, you were gonna have to take someone out the picture. You shook your daughter awake and watched as she opened her beautiful E/C eyes that resembled your own.

“Katsumi..hey baby, wake up.” You softly said with a reassuring smile to not alarm her. You watched as she rubbed her eyes with her tiny fist and looked up at you.

“Mommy? What’s going on?” She asked as she looked around in a daze.

“You’re gonna have a little play date at Auntie Mina and Uncle Kiri’s house. Uncle Denki and Uncle Sero will be there too! You excited?” You asked with enthusiasm to hide your pain.

“Really Mommy?!” Your daughter asked with excitement.

“Mhm! Get ready and get dressed for Mommy. They’ll be here at 8, okay?” You said rubbing your daughter’s back before she quickly jumped out of bed and into her own bathroom.

“Okay Mommy!” She said as she ran into the bathroom, turning on the sink to begin her morning routine. Some time passed and Katsumi got dressed and you went back in her room to help her dry her hair. You helped her put on her shoes and by the time they were on, Mina and Kiri were already at the door.

You opened it with a soft smile and the couple looked at you with supportive, sad eyes. “Hey guys..”

“It’s okay to be sad Y/N, we’re here for you.” Mina said. Your eyes teared up at her words but you shook your head and gave her a hug.

“Thank you, but I promise myself I wouldn’t cry. At least, not when Katsumi’s around. I gotta be strong for her. Her whole life’s about to change after all.” You sadly said as you looked down and released your hold on Mina. Your pink friend nodded before walking into the house to find Katsumi in her bedroom. You and Kirishima stayed at the door and talked a bit more.

“I’m so sorry for all of this Y/N. I should’ve been watching him more.” Kirishima said as he looked down in sorrow.

“Kiri, you shouldn’t have to watch him. He cheated and that was his choice. Your choice was being a true friend and telling me. A true man,” you joked. You both gave a little bittersweet laugh before calming down again. “Thank you so much Kirishima.”

The red head did nothing but pull you in for a tight hug. You almost cried on his shoulder before your daughter came to the both of you. “Uncle Kiri!”

You both separated and looked down at the excited 5 year old. She jumped onto her uncle and he happily held her in his arms. “Hey squirt. Ready for a day full of fun?”

“Mhm!” Katsumi replied. You all talked some more before Katsumi said her goodbye to you and went off with Kirishima and Mina. You shut the door and took a break as you allowed a few silent tears to drop. You wiped them away and went to pack your daughter’s bags. Just a few more hours and he’d be home..probably. All you knew was that you’d have to face him eventually.

Finally, you finished packing your daughter’s things and placed them in your car. You put on a jacket and waited for Katsuki to walk through the doors. Soon, this perfect little family would go crumbling to the ground.

—

Katsuki pulled into his driveway and his eyes took notice of your car still there. He smiled at the sight and quickly got out of the car. He slammed the vehicle door shut and ran to the entrance. He unlocked the door in a rush and to say he was happy to see you on the couch, still there, was an understatement.

“Y/N! Hey Teddy Bear! I am so sorry!” He said as he ran to you and sat down next to you on the couch, pulling you in for a tight hug. He was too happy to even notice your jacket and shoes that you wore.

“Katsuki, you were gone all night. Where were you?” You said in a soft voice as you placed your hand on his chest so you could face him.

“I-..I overdid it and spent the night at Kirishima’s. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you, love. I was passed out the whole night.” He said and attempted to pull you in again but you pressed a hand to his chest to stop him. You couldn’t believe he was going to lie to you. Actually, now that you think about it, cheating wasn’t below him so why would lying be either?

“So why didn’t Kirishima call me? Or Mina?” You questioned. Unfortunately, you underestimated Katsuki’s quick tongue. He was a good liar, and if you hadn’t already known the truth, you’d probably believe him.

“Shitty hair’s phone died and Alien girl was asleep by the time we got back. By the time he put me in the guest bed, I knocked out so don’t asked me what happened after.” He said. Your anger and fury grew at his lies but he didn’t notice. “Look, I’m so sorry I came back so late but I can make it up to you Teddy Bear. Now would you just give me a hu-“

“SHUT! UP!” You screamed as you pushed him off of you. You stood up from the couch and Bakugou watched you in “confusion.” Bakugou felt his heart racing as he had a guess at why you were so mad but he refused to believe it.

“T-Teddy Bear, whats wrong?” He asked with shaky hands as he tried to reach out to you but you dodged all his attempts.

“What’s wrong? What’s wrong?! You’re fucking lying to me! You’re lying to me after doing what you did! Katsuki, are you just gonna act like you don’t know what you did?! Because I know! So why don’t you?!” You screamed at him. Bakugou still couldn’t believe you knew so he tried his soft attempts once more and reached out to you again.

“Baby, please calm dow-“

“Are you fucking serious Katsuki? You’re gonna tell me to calm down?!” You laughed out in disbelief. You watched as Katsuki’s lip began to tremble and he looked down in shame. “Say it.”

“What?” He spoke softly.

“Say what you did.”

“......”

“Say it Katsuki! Tell me what you did and how you betrayed not only me but your daughter too.” You specified. It took Bakugou a second before he spoke up in a soft, quiet voice.

“I cheated on you...”

“Louder.”

“I cheated on you!” He said while standing up and facing you with tears in his eyes. “I cheated on you! Okay?! I got drunk last night and slept with someone else but baby I swear I didn’t mean it!” He said as he walked to you and tried to hold you. You once again pushed his hands away before speaking back.

“It doesn’t matter if you meant it or not Katsuki! You still did it!” Your voice grew dry as it began to break. Your eyes pooled with tears as you continued. “I would’ve NEVER done that to you. I wouldn’t even be CAPABLE of doing that to you Katsuki! Because I love you!”

“I love you Y/N! I swear I do!” He fought back but you retaliated.

“It doesn’t seem like it! Because you slept with someone else! You promised me you would never hurt me. You promised you would always protect me. You promised me that you loved me and only me! Not only that but you promised your daughter that you would never bring harm to her! Guess what?! You’re the reason her whole life is going to be so fucked Katsuki! Do you realize that?!” You screamed at him.

“I do, Teddy Bear, I do!” He said.

“Don’t fucking call me that Katsuki!” You said with an exasperated voice. Bakugou shook his head as he walked to you and kneeled infront of you.

“Baby, please! I’m sorry! I was drunk, it didn’t mean anything! It was a mistake but if we can forget about this I promise I’ll make it up to you!” He begged.

“Forget? Forget?! Are you insane?! I’m never gonna be able to forget any of this Katsuki. How the hell am I supposed to forget that my first friend, my first love, my first kiss, my first everything betrayed me like this! How am I supposed to forget that my husband, who I’ve known since we were fucking babies, cheated on me?! Tell me!” You said as the tears finally fell.

“I don’t know...I don’t know but I promise I can make it up to you! So please forgive me! Please stay!” He pleaded. The whole time he couldn’t let go of you. Every time you pushed him off, he just came right back.

“How am I supposed to trust that you’ll actually keep that promise?” You said softly with a sad voice. “If it wasn’t clear already, I’m not staying. We’re getting a divorce, Katsuki.”

Bakugou felt his heart shatter. He looked at you with his trembling body and shaky irises. “W-What?”

“Katsuki...you cheated. There’s no other way around it. No explanations or excuses. And you can’t even blame it on the alcohol because I’ve been blackout drunk before too and the idea of cheating on you never even crossed my mind. You have nobody to blame but yourself.” You said with a broken voice and a shrug. “We’re getting a divorce and I’m taking Katsumi with me.” You said and began to walk to the door.

Bakugou couldn’t believe what he just heard and so he got up from his knees and ran after you. He ran in front of you and held you by the shoulders. “What?! No! Baby!! Please, that’s my daughter! You can’t just take her from me, please!”

“I won’t be taking her from you,” you said and pushed his hands off your shoulders. “We can co-parent, but when she’s old enough, when Katsumi asks why we’re no longer together, I’ll be telling her the truth. So you can still see her, but when she’s ready to know, if she decides she hates you and doesn’t want to see you ever again, then you’ll have to accept it.”

At this point, Katsuki began to openly cry as he allowed his fat tears to flow down his face. Hiccups left his mouth as he shamelessly sobbed infront of you. “Y-Y/N....please don’t go. You guys are my family, you’re both my entire world..I-I love you both so much,” he said and went in to grab your hand, which you allowed. “I know I hurt you both a-and I know I fucked up, but please just give me another chance. I swear this was just a mistake, I never meant to do it. Please stay...please let me fix my mistake. I love you.”

Tears once again filled your eyes but you didn’t allow them to flow. “.....I love you too Katsuki,” at those words, Bakugou felt a bit of hope. “But I just can’t stay with you. If it was just me..I probably would give you another chance..but Katsumi is your daughter Katsuki. She’s your own flesh and blood and you betrayed her. You’re supposed to be her hero and you betrayed her like this. I just can’t trust the fact that you won’t do something like this again, and not just for my sake but for our daughter’s too. I’m sorry, but this is where we end.”

Once you said that you walked away from Bakugou, leaving him in shock. He stood there, regretting everything. Not just his mistake, but all the times where he could’ve been a better husband.

‘I should’ve held her more..I should’ve been home more...I should’ve been more for them,’ he thought until he heard the door open and slam shut. He turned to face it and looked around the now very empty house. He allowed silent tears to drip down his face and then he took a little tour of his new environment.

He walked to the master bedroom and saw all your belongings gone. He saw your closet was empty, all your shoes gone. He went into the bathroom and saw all your stuff was missing. The tears flowed faster and when he walked into his daughter’s room, it made it 10x worse.

He opened the door to the pink room and saw her bedsheets missing, all her toys gone, her closet was barren, and her bathroom was hollow. He walked back out to his little girl’s former bed and sat down. He cried on the bed and sobbed into his hands. He broke down as he thought back to your words. You were right.

‘You have nobody to blame but yourself.’

Katsuki looked up from his hands and when he did, he took notice of the picture frame that was left faced down on the night stand. He picked it up and his heart turned to dust. It couldn’t break anymore. He looked at the picture of his once happy family. His beautiful wife, his blessing of a daughter. His two girls who had a protector...that protector was supposed to be him...and he failed. He smiled at the picture but continued to cry. It was a beautiful sight but you left it behind.

He took the picture with him as he walked to his bedroom. He sat on the bed and held the frame close to his chest as he layed down on the cold mattress. Tears still freely fell as a shadow casted over his eyes. No words could be said except for a few.

“N-Nobody to blame but myself.”

@darl1ngmei

A/N: Hey Cubs! It’s been awhile since my requests have been closed AND THEY STILL ARE but the reason why I took this one was because I’ve been on a writing spree recently (I literally have 15 drafts full of different writing pieces🤣) and I rly liked this request! Please don’t start sending requests because they may just get lost. When I open up my requests, then you guys can send some because I love to satisfy! Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this piece and thank you to the cub who requested this! 🧸💗

[nishisun]

suna rintaro is NOT a genius.

summary: you loved the idea of soulmates. suna rintaro didn’t. it isn’t that hard to put two and two together to realize that maybe people with different opinions on things don’t belong together.

part 2

a/n: this was literally supposed to be a series, i gave up on it because i just didn’t like the way it turned out. it used to be called “out of my league” and this was the intro. i also renamed it. just emptying drafts!! please don’t get confused with the random timeskip, once again, this was a part of a series i never ended up posting😭

WARNING!!: suggestive themes, mentions of death, idk kinda angsty but tell me if i missed anything

Soulmates. Whatever the hell that means. The idea of soulmates is something I truly don’t understand. It’s bullshit, honestly. It’s all-pervasive.

My mother always told me I'd eventually find "the one.” I used to believe that when I was younger of course. But in my opinion? It’s all cliches. It's unhelpful, and it's certainly not true. Destiny is an excuse for the weak. Why do you think most marriages end in divorce? It's 'cause people who believe they are “destined to be" assume everything will fall into place without any effort. I don't appreciate people pontificating bullshit like that just to make me feel better, especially if they haven't found their "soulmate" themselves. My sister once told me, “People who believe in soulmates are more likely to break up and encounter more difficulty in their relationship, which will lead them to give up on one another eventually.”

I sure do believe that.

My mother is a prime example. Fumeiko Suna, my dear mother. Well, she clearly hasn’t found hers. I found out when I came home after a tedious day of school in 5th grade and found my dear mother on the floor crying, with bruises all over her face and a busted lip.

Initially, I thought a burglar had broken into our home once again, but if that were the case then there would’ve been missing furniture. But there wasn’t.

In fact, the place seemed cleaner than usual. When I ran up to her and asked her what had happened, there he was. The devil himself. My father. He reeked of alcohol, and I could detect his shadow towering over me. It’s funny how that I think of it. I used to fear that son of a bitch. Now, I’m way taller than him, and hate his guts. I turned around to see a faux-sympathetic smile plastered on his face.

He explained how my mother was being “clumsy” and had fell and busted her lip on one of the corners of the kitchen table and when I turned back around to face my mother, she smiled gently and nodded in agreement. She didn’t say anything after that.

It was then I realized my father had beat my mother to a pulp.

Long story short, when I found it was my father, sure, I was frightened. In fact, I remember going into my siblings’ rooms to inform them, they shrugged it off and told me that dad had been doing it for a while now.

Over time, when my dad had found out that I was aware, he didn't mind beating the absolute shit out of my mother in front of all three of us. This was when my burning hatred for that man started. Nobody in the house even attempted to stop him. I did a few times, though. He took all his anger out on me. At least my mom had a break for the day.

I almost pitied my mother. Almost. Maybe if she was strong enough to leave him, then yeah, I’d feel bad. But she still decides to stay with his sorry ass. It’s pathetic. It’s unrequited love or whatever you call it. How could she still love that asshole?

I mean, I’m not even going to lie, I’m an asshole too, but I’m definitely not my dad. I would never want to be him. He’s not someone I looked up to, he doesn’t do anything inspirational. He’s a businessman. He travels the majority of the time, and I’m pretty sure my mom invites men over when he’s gone. I don’t care enough to find out. But if I ever hear some guy rearranging my mom’s guts, I’ll kill him. I don’t even blame my mother. What she’s doing is wrong, she knows it and so do both of my older siblings. But they don't seem to care so why should I?

Who knows why she just won’t leave him. Maybe it’s cause they don’t want to ruin how people view our “picture perfect” family. I wonder what they’d say. “I thought the Suna’s were the ideal family? I guess not.”

My dad would probably lose it if he heard that.

Both my mother and my father are the cause of this broken family of mine. They never fed me or any of my siblings the love we always desired when we were younger. They never came to any of my volleyball games when I was younger. They never applauded me for the little recitals we’d have in class in primary school. They were never even here for most of my childhood. They always put money first and left us with the housekeepers. Hell, the housekeepers probably know me better than my own parents.They failed as parents. I despise them for it. They’re most likely the reason I am the way I am, but to be honest?

I don’t give a fuck.

In fact, I should thank them! Because of how they “raised” me, i’m extremely blunt, which is why people respect me. I use the hatred I have for my family and take it out on people and no, I’m not proud of that. I may be a heartless asshole, but I like that people fear me. The hell? Does that make me a sadist? Either way, people know to never fuck with me cause I’d fuck their shit up. I’ve overheard many people say it’s ‘cause of my privilege. It probably is. Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure can buy you many other things.

If my parents were broke, I’d probably be expelled from school by now. Abuse of alcohol and drugs are forbidden on school property. I don’t even take them at school, I somewhat care about my education and health, but sometimes I just need to blow some steam. Even if I did, nobody’s gonna say shit since my dad is the head of Japan’s board of education. How did his ass even get there?

Call me lonely or cynical. Maybe I am. But how is that a bad thing? Why do people need a significant other to rely on? What, a soulmate is just going to turn my life upside down then suddenly bring me happiness? Pfft, I’m gonna need actual proof that shit like that still happens. I’ve only seen shit like that in fairy tale movies. It’s whatever, though. I can live with being alone. I’ve basically been alone my whole life and it isn’t as bad as people make it.

You loved the idea of having a soulmate. The thought of meeting someone who just understood you, accepted you for who you were, and most importantly, loved you excited you. You couldn’t wait to meet your soulmate.

But recently, you weren’t sure soulmates existed.

When your older sister, Akira, came into your room and burst into tears, it frightened you. Your older sister, the one who’d always provide you advice on relationships and how to keep one was in your room sobbing hysterically because hers hadn’t worked out.

“I just can't believe it,” she sobbed.

You couldn’t believe it either. Your sister had recently gotten engaged to her boyfriend of 9 years. They started dating at the age of 15 and managed to make things work out even after high school, and out of all those years of dating, they never broke up. Not even once.

They’d go on romantic dates on Saturdays and they’d always write love letters to one another every day, just to remind one another of how grateful they were to have each other in their lives. On Halloween, they’d dress up as fictional characters from TV shows and books and take cute selfies and bake a bunch of sweets. They’d invite you to come bake with them, but you would politely deny. You knew they were only offering so you wouldn’t feel left out, which you appreciated.

Of course, they’d argue every now and then, but at the end of the day, they always managed to talk things out. Oh to have a relationship like theirs. They were everything you wanted to have in a relationship and more.

“I really thought he was the one for me, y’know?” No, you don’t know. But that doesn't matter. What mattered was cheering your sister up.

“Maybe he wasn’t ‘the one’ Akira, and that’s okay! People come and go all the time, soulmates come and go all the time as well-”

“You still believe soulmates are real, huh?” she let out a humorless laugh and sniffed her nose, “What If I missed my one shot at love, Y/N? What if I lost my soulmate?”

That’s some deep shit.

Now that you think about it, were soulmates real? Soulmates come and go, yes, you’re aware of that, but even though they leave, it’s always temporary. Soulmates always find a way back to their other half, the piece that completes them.

Your dad never made it back to your mother.

He died in a car crash 5 years ago. Your mother and father had been arguing because she claimed your father was cheating on her since he wouldn’t let her check his phone.

You were 13 at the time. Your sister Akira was accompanying you in your room, listening to them arguing back and forth with one another. There was furniture flying across the room, glass breaking, and both of them throwing curses at each other. You were scared. They never argued in front of you and your sister. They'd bicker sometimes, but it was never anything too deep.

Eventually, your father had enough of your mother’s false accusations, and out of anger, he packed his things and left home. For weeks. It wasn’t until one of your uncles called your mother and broke the news. She didn’t take it very well.

Late 2012-early 2013.

Not many people came to your father’s funeral, his family didn’t like the fact that he and your mother were together, they said your mother was trouble, but your dad still stayed with her, even if that meant it would completely destroy the bond he had with his family. Now that’s true love, you had thought. Only your mother, Akira, the Sunas, your uncle, and you, of course, attended the funeral.

It hurt a lot. It hurt when your mother informed both your grandparents on your mother and father’s side and all they could do is put the blame on her. It hurt how they had claimed you, Akira and your mother were a hindrance to your dear father’s well-being. How could they be so cruel at a time like this?

That was the first time you ever questioned if soulmates were real. Maybe they fell in love at the wrong time? Who knows.

After your father’s passing, Fumiko Suna, your mother’s best friend, was there to help your family out financially. Your mother couldn’t even find the motivating to go to work. Your mother and Fumiko have been best friends since junior high, they’ve literally been inseparable ever since. In fact, after they both got married, they decided to live right next to each other.

Your mom didn’t cope with your father’s death very well; none of you did. But your mom had it the worst.

She would cope with alcohol and clubbing which would always result in her bringing different men home almost every night. You didn’t say much about it, you thought it would be selfish to since that’s what seemed to make your mother feel better about herself, but your sister hated it. She was already 19 and in college at the time, but when she visited and found out that your mother had basically been neglecting you, she was furious.

“Seriously, mom? This is what you’re gonna do while your 13-year-old daughter is in her room having a literal mental breakdown because of your childish behavior?” Your sister had barged into your mother’s room when she thought you were asleep, she was screaming loud.

“You’re interrupting something important, Akira. You know better than to-”

“Oh, shut the hell up mom. You’re the last person on earth to be saying shit like that.”

“Well, if you’re done, you can leave my room now. You’re being disrespectful, and this behavior is not tolerated!” Your mother was screaming now. The man in the bed covering his body under the covers and looking back and forth between Akira and your mother.

“Sakiya, maybe you should hear your daughter out-”

“Not now.” your mother scarcely interrupted the man, eye contact never leaving Akira. “Y/N has never complained about this when you were in college. She knows this is my way of coping, why can’t you understand that too!”

Akira scoffed. “So what, getting fucked by random strangers you find on the filthy streets is your way of coping? Getting wasted every damn night to the point where Y/N has to drag you up to bed is okay with you? Do you even know how much this is affecting Y/N? Did you even bother asking her how she felt? I hate breaking it to you mom, but you need serious help.”

“You selfish child!” Your mother screamed, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around her body, getting up from the bed. “How dare you say that to your own mother?”

“I’m only telling the truth! If you’re the mother, then it’s your job to be taking care of Y/N, not neglecting her. When’s the last time you’ve engross in an actual conversation with her when you were fully sober?”

Your mother was silent. She quickly walked up to Akira and grabbed her by the hair and slammed her headfirst against the wall.

“You’ve got a big mouth! Maybe I should wash it with soap like I did back in the day, hm?” Akira was attempting to push her mother away, but she wouldn’t let go of her grip. The man that was still on your mother’s bed was in panic, yelling her name, which didn’t have any effect. He might as well stop.

"Look," Akira mumbled, struggling to get away from your mother's grip, "I know it's been hard ever since dad left-"

“Mom! Let go of her!” You cried from the door of her room.

All 3 adults froze and looked at your glassy eyes, mouths wide open.

“Hey, kiddo, I thought you were asleep?” Akira playfully said, your mother let go of Akira and crossed her arms then looked away from you.

“Well, I can't really go to sleep when there’s a bunch of adults yelling about my well-being,” you muttered incoherently. You quickly wiped the uncontrollable tears off your face and sighed.

“Honey,” your mom started, she walked slowly to you, carefully examined your face, and attempted to hug you, but you didn’t accept the offer which made your mother frown. She stopped walking until she was almost face to face with you and placed a hand on your shoulder gently. “Baby, your sister told me that you weren’t happy. Is this true?”

You looked away from her and stared dully at the floor, subtly shifting your feet, then you softly shook your head “no.”

“See Akira, Y/N is happy. So please stop stressing her out.” Your mother said through gritted teeth, then faced you once again. “Y/N honey, how about I go tuck you into bed, hm? I’m so sorry for the excessive noise that was caused.”

“Mom, how clueless can you be? Y/N looks miserable! It’s unhealthy for Y/N to be living-“

Slap.

Your mother just slapped Akira on the face.

“I know what’s best for my daughter! I am her mother! You are not the one who should be telling me how to take care of my own kid!”

“That’s enough, Sakiya.” a familiar voice said from the door.

“Fumeiko-“

“It’s fine. Sakiya, we need to talk.” It was Fumeiko Suna, your mother’s best friend, also known as your next door neighbor. She had been standing in the hallways the whole time, you didn’t even know she was there. Akira was the one who called her over.

That night your mother agreed to get help for her drinking problem. She was gone for 6 months. During those 6 months, the Suna’s took you in since Akira would be in college and you couldn’t have been more grateful.

You and Rintaro were the only kids in the house, being that you both were the same age and the others were in college. It was okay, they were all very polite, dinners were awkward, you could feel some sort of tension between the family but you didn’t pay any attention to it.

When your mom finally came back, it was awkward at first. She still seemed the same, loving and caring, just sober and free of alcohol. It was nice. You two spent the weekends bonding at the mall, watching a movie, or even getting your nails done. Eventually, she gained your trust back, and you couldn’t have been happier.

January 2017.

“Akira, don’t say that. You may not believe me now, but you are such an amazing person, don’t ever think you’ll never find love again. It’s all about having a positive mindset!” you said, thoughtfully stroking her hair as her head laid on your chest.

“I told you that.”

“You did,” you chuckled, “you should take your own advice.

“Oh, shut up!” you both laughed, and Akira let out a shaky sigh. “Thank you, Y/N.”

“Of course, you don't need to thank me. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

— so this is one of the writings that i wrote in January 😭 it’s been in my drafts and i re-read it once and instantly hated it right after. if there’s any typos please tell me!!

— also i wanna apologize again for putting gmds on hiatus,, i feel so bad 😭 i wanna make it up to you guys but idk how so if you have suggestions pls tell me

[blushing-starker]

Anon asked for alpha Peter and omega Tony for a baby announcement. Thank you to the wonderful @vaguekiwi for motivating me and sharing her thoughts on the story. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did, anon.

"Tony, Tony? Are you up? It's 7:30am already, you have a meeting with Miss Potts in forty minutes. Tony?"

Soft hands curl into already silver hair, scratching at the strands in an attempt to wake him up gently. Butterfly kisses on a cold nape, a ridiculously hot nose nuzzling everywhere. Peter knows scenting the billionaire is basically the only way one can ensure a calm morning.

Not today. And not for the next few months either.

He loves his husband, appreciates the nearly romantic demeanor, he does. But "unless you have a cup of coffee for me, there is no way in hell i am gonna leave this bed. your child has kept me up with nausea the entire night. I wanna hurl my guts out more than that time Rhodes found Dad's liquor cabinet. please, tell me you have coffee."

"..." Tony is severely displeased by the fact he can read Peter like a book even with half his mind shut off because fine, he's right and dammit all.

"I want that weird drink you make. The one with milk, cinnamon and chunks of brownie. And French toast with waffles. No jam, not too much butter, as much sugar as possible. Now, go before I scream at you for having the only dick that could get a hormone fucked forty something omega pregnant. "

The kid scrambles from bed, practically face plants with all the covers tangling long legs and yup, this is the person that the universe designated as his soulmate. Because Tony Stark can never have a partner with a reasonable, normal amount of enthusiasm, stamina and a sense of balance.

That sounds like he's ungrateful, he's not. But it turns out being three months pregnant gives him plenty of perspective to peer at life in a whole new way that does not include caffeine, alcohol or sex.

Would he kill and die for this amazing human being that makes Tony's heart race no matter the day, that inspires him to be a better version of himself? Yes, no questions asked. No hesitation and no regret.

Would he clobber Peter for doing the impossible and technically causing Tony incredible discomfort on a daily basis thanks to what his doctors can only assume is a superhuman baby he already loves and adores more than life itself? Also yes.

Things aren't mutually exclusive in this household.

Pep, bless her, has yet to find out about their future mini Parker so there's been no respite on the whole 'running a multi billion dollar industry ' thing. And yeah, while it's not exactly easy, he can focus on other things and not fall into a panicky state of mind — because him? A father? Of a super baby? Tony Stark, infamous playboy with a hedonistic streak, a dad?

Just thinking along those lines makes shame and self doubt slither over a metallic plate. Working, dealing with innovative scientists, crafting the new world of tomorrow, guaranteeing the safety of their planet, shapeshifting into a role model, a mentor (for the interns and school kids he visits, not Peter, of course, thank God they left that dynamic ages ago), loyal friend, reluctant errand boy (fuck the assholes in charge of the Accords), great husband, good man, it all distracts a fearful child from thinking, what if I turn into Howard?

"I couldn't find brownies, so cookies it is! Aunt May had a few boxes sent in when I told her work was keeping you on your feet all the time. Said it'd be a good idea to snack along the day in case you—" Peter freezes, tenses with a not-so-narrow back held ramrod straight. Oh, his husband brought him breakfast in bed.

How could he ever think to clobber such a nice, wonderful—

"Your scent is odd."

"Yeah, well fuck you too then."

Five seconds of silence.

"I'm bringing you one cup of coffee and the hormone pills."

" Yup, that's a great idea. "

---------------------------

Tony’s mumbo jumbo with self loathing is firmly put on the back burner after inhaling a delicious breakfast and chugging that one glorious cup of coffee. Until they go to the bathroom and he sees himself in the mirror.

"We gotta tell them."

"You said you wanted to wait a while before saying anything."

Peter strips, ducks into the warm shower, lets out a pleased little sigh and Tony wants to rip his fingernails off. Is it bad, having sex while pregnant? No! The doctors, every single one of them, said it's a perfectly normal thing to do. It'd be bad if they didn't have sex because Tony, thanks to his crazy hormone production, needs the extra attention for his body to understand this is a happy process that shouldn't include sad pheromones or stressed out moments. Will Peter put him out of his misery and allow a quickie in the mornings? No.

"Take more than five minutes in that shower and I'm joining you."

Listen, he grew up in the 80's and 90's, Tony wasn't immune to peer pressure. Did he cave and eventually do so many squat competitions with Rhodey his butt turned into a duck's butt? There's no evidence, he's made sure, but yes. And Starks have always turned out to be beautiful, doesn't matter your gender or age. Finding a companion for the night has never been a problem for anyone in his family tree.

That, and his work as Iron Man has kept him — well, not ripped like Cap, certainly not as lean and (God help him) athletic as Peter, but fit. Sturdy. Firm. Solid. (Peter once muttered the words 'daddy-like' in regards to his body and he nearly choked on water.)

The passage of time has made him a bit slower, dusted once black hair with, as his husband says, stardust and the corners of his eyes now show how much time Tony spends laughing or frowning. All in all, he looks fucking spectacular for his age and experience as a villain-punching-bag. Thing is, he has a belly. A bump. A curve where it was once, well. Less curvy. Is it a problem for Peter? Nope, as acknowledged every time his alpha tackles him if he so much as looks oddly in the mirror. Is it a problem for him? He'll get back to you on that.

The point is, there's a belly when just a few months ago there wasn't such a pronounced belly. It's great, of course. Proof their child is growing steadily and Tony's body is adjusting to it accordingly. A small part of him, the omega part he actually lets live, is fascinated and proud. He's doing that, Tony's the one growing a human being, creating life out of nothing in his own body. That child, although not the only physical embodiment of their relationship, is a result of his love for Peter. Of how much his husband loves him. They love each other so much they're gonna start another family together. That chokes him up a bit, reminds him how grateful he is for Peter and for the other Avengers. If they hadn't been so accepting of his status, would he have ever considered going through with this?

Anyway, he's not gonna start sobbing this early in the morning when there's no alcohol involved. It's fantastic seeing his child develop, good, warm and fuzzy feelings, yada yada yada, it's also not very easy to hide. And Tony...Tony wanted to hide it from his family because.

Because Peter hasn't been the only partner in all his life that has wondered about a future with a white picket fence. Because when he was Peter's age, in his goddamn prime, a doctor, ten doctors, all the doctors told him the same thing, smashed his dream into a million pieces. Tony was nearly infertile. There was a one in a million chances of him getting pregnant. If he did, they couldn't be sure his body would be able to maintain two hearts. And then the cave happened.

So yeah. It happened to his cousins, his aunt, a few uncles, his grandmother. Tony would do a baby announcement, but only the second that baby was outside of him and safely in his arms. Now there are still several months left and nothing certain. But time is a bitch and beginning to show the world, maybe those extra pounds aren't from eating the Parker's amazing breakfasts.

"Tony, you know I don't wanna risk-" Losing control of my strength. They've been together long enough that Tony can see quite clearly between the lines.

"Hurting us, yeah, I know, I understand. I'm getting too wide, we're gonna have to tell them or Natasha will take one look at me and whoops, impromptu announcement from someone else. It's a miracle she was out on those missions when we found out." Thank God for renegade troops.

He's still looking at himself in the mirror when Peter comes out, barely dries up and slides behind him. His husband is slightly taller now, can easily hook a curved jaw on Tony's shoulder to peer at the image they make. Contrasts, he supposes, have always enthralled Tony. The study of light and shadow. Variations of the same basic components. Where his body is aging, showing signs of wear and tear, Peter's is evolving into something beautiful, majestic. Silver hair, chestnut brown. Scarred canvas, silky smooth and sunkissed skin. Soft, fragile curves, chiseled lines that deserve to be revered more than Michelangelo’s David. But their eyes, their eyes are equally tired.

“We can tell them if you want, have dinner together and just, just say it. Like that -”

“No. It's our kid, we're not gonna act like it's ripping off a band aid. This is special, unique. Dinner is good. Fantastic, actually. Wait for dessert, and announce it. “ Peter comes ever closer, wraps arms that could carry the world around him and how did he get so lucky?

They've lied to each other in the past. Mostly in the beginning, when they were too worried about hurting their new relationship to show their desires and wants. Tony didn't explain the Training Wheels Protocol. Peter tried to fight high level crime on his own. Things got hard to understand, like being in the right place at the wrong time. Puzzle pieces that didn't quite fit together, an extra inch of space prohibiting them from seeing all the possibilities that the truth could bring. They were walking the same path, just in parallel lines that never crossed.

But then he'd been rejected, thrown away and able to realize how fucking stupid it was to let Peter go when being near the kid, it felt like finally breathing after residing in the deep end of a pool for a thousand years. So Tony ran after him one day, crashed into his AP English class, half assed an excuse for the baffled teacher, yanked Peter out of the room and proceeded to have the best make out session of his life with his back against the kid's locker. And now they don't lie, ever.

Which is why it's so hard to accept Peter's, “You're beautiful, Tony. The handsomest man I've ever seen in my life. I loved you before, I love you now, I'll love you forever, Anthony Stark. You carrying our kid doesn't change that, how could it, Tony? It's going to be ok. The three of us will be ok and I won't stop thanking whoever decided I'd get to marry my wet dream.”

Scorching kisses trace his pulse point slowly, sharp nails start dragging against a too thin shirt, but it's the fact that Peter hasn't looked away from him, is confidently holding his gaze through the glass, that makes Tony shudder and stop breathing.

The bathroom is flooded with pheromones, cinnamon and honey assaulting an unprepared billionaire, and he'll die if they stay like this, can't function properly, brain switching gears, trying valiantly to remember baseball stats, past wounds, May's cooking because Peter's gonna wreck his sanity if those hands keep winding down, if those lips don't stop unraveling him like a Christmas present.

“If I'd known you'd get this handsy and romantic, I would have complained about how I look earlier." It's a gasp, half murmur, half plea as Peter grins at him shamelessly. “I know it's rude and wrong and sexist, but I like comforting my omega, acting like a stereotypical alpha. Makes me feel like I'm doing my job of making you happy. “

He quirks an eyebrow, is glad Peter can be comfortable enough to take the reins every once in a while. “You're telling me that assuring me I'm still drop dead gorgeous, “ his husband snorts, nips at Tony's shoulder for that quip, “ makes you horny because you feel like an alpha comforting, and I quote, ‘your omega’? “

Peter reverts back to the shy teenager who could barely ask a girl out to the homecoming dance, ducks his head into Tony’s neck with a blush quickly spreading over damp skin. “Well, I've got news for you, sweetheart. Your wet dream also thoroughly enjoys it so you better break tradition and have sex with me to remind me I'm the hottest man you've ever seen. "

He's actually serious about this, his self esteem hasn't exactly been, you know, the best and Tony's mood always improves significantly after playing around in bed with Peter. Besides, it's a sign of trust. Peter won't hurt him or their child, will be able to hold back his strength. He always does.

Listen, it's not exactly moral, but he has more than enough problems to go ahead and analyze his attraction and dependency on Peter while pregnant.

“So, I can distract you from your bad thoughts by acting sort of possessive and taking you to bed? " Oh, he adores when his husband is afraid of showing a new side of himself and asks for permission ever so sweetly.

“Babe, if you don't, I'll kick you out of the apartment. Give me possessive Peter Parker any day you want, like I'm gonna complain about a gorgeous, brilliant twenty something year old all over me. Now what's it gonna be, alpha dear, bathroom or bedroom? I wouldn't mind the tile but, oh God, I forgot you could pick me up." Tony clings to broad shoulders, can't help but laugh because aren't they a pair?

-------------------------

After having what he's sure was the best sex of his life, Tony stumbles out of the bedroom with torn clothes, a dazed look in his eyes and several bruises blossoming around his neck. Peter's halfway out the doorway when Tony whistles, makes sure all their family is paying attention, blurts out, “Peter and I are having a kid. I'm pregnant, woohoo, it's great, it's amazing, save your congratulations for later. We'll do a proper thing soon, if anyone interrupts and they're not dying, I'll kill you myself. See you in a few hours, " and yanks him back in while Friday activates Sock on the Doorknob Protocol.

Rhodey and Nat clink glasses while waiting on the others to pay up on their bets regarding Tony and Peter's odd behavior.

--------------------------

Later, much later, like, two days later, they have a proper dinner with their family in the tower. There are balloons and streamers, cake and ice cream, warm hugs and gentle cheek kisses, subtle tears and full on weeping (Happy had to borrow a box of Kleenex), pictures and videos and a pile of gifts taller than Tony.

The most important thing, though, is that the A.I recorded the reaction after Clint asked about baby names. He's grateful they went to the doctor before tonight. The visit revealed a treasure Tony thought he'd never have. Now it's time to reveal it to their pack.

His husband snuggles up to him, is so ecstatic the whole dining room smells like cinnamon and honey, like joyous love he'll never get enough of. Tony grins at him, curls their hands together and repeats the same thing over and over again in his head.

It'll be ok. They'll be ok. If the universe keeps giving Tony the greatest gifts he could ever want, maybe it's time he stopped looking at the horse's mouth. That's how it goes, right? Right.

He turns to look at Peter, loves him so much it aches, feels tiny feet pressing against his stomach. Guesses he's not the only one smitten with this incredible human being.

“We were thinking Marie,” Peter smiles at him, eyes lit up and lovely.

Tony is never going to forget this moment, this warmth in his chest.

“And Benjamin Parker-Stark.”

Their family loses their shit and both Friday and Karen have ample proof.

(@puppypeter look, omega tones! @tonystarkisaslut thank you so much for allowing me to use the prompt board! I am still accepting prompts! Although I can't guarantee getting them ready within a few days, I'll try to finish them on the one week mark depending on how long the fic is!)

[honorable-wanderings]

Word of Honor - Episode 2 Part 2 - Mirror Lake has more Fire than expected

In an interesting twist of fate Zhou Zishu decides to take the nice munchkin up on his offer to crash at his place for a while.

Thumbs up my dood

----------

Now the fuck are these guys?

Oh cool. Thanks.

---------

See? Children chants are creepy! Always!

But especially when driven by plort! (plort was a typo but I’m Keeping it.)

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Finally people treating our man with common decency and respect! Who knew he just needed a fancy bookmark?

Oop. Nevermind

------------

I have discovered the joys of fucking with people and I’m never going back again

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A fuck this guy again. I’m assuming we’re not supposed to like him? But I don’t like him either way. He has no...  je ne sais quoi

He boring. Basic. Bland.

It ain’t good.

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Oh and also you know how you wanted us to keep tabs on Zhou ZiShu? Oh well um.. it’s going great! Great! Yeah... except for... we can’t find him.

-----------

Well if this ain’t a whole ass mood?

-----------

Midnight already? Time for the pain pins to poke me painfully!

This sure is a weird version of Cinderella

gross

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Okay okay so normally the 7 torture nails block your chi? I’m understanding? So you can no longer do martial arts. And he would rather die than lose all his martial arts so he put the nails in slowly so that he could still have SOME of his martial arts. But the point of the nails is still that he wants to die and feels he deserves to be punished as well? Right? So having his martial arts helps mediate the pain which lessons the punishment

and if it weren’t for the punishment aspect couldn’t he have just like... faked the nails? Or would they have been able to tell? I mean this is all dramatic and all but where are your motivations Zhou ZiShu?

work with me here

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Hey?! That’s not sunlight?!?

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Love me a good silhouette shot

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And suddenly everything is on fire???

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Rude

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After watching like 4 people get killed in front of him and a lot of fire and ransacking our protragonists finally thinks perhaps he should get himself involved.

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How is everything a fucking boomerang???

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Pffffff I love it

Tunk thunk

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In another interesting development, the boat man from before is important?????

Also our boy is doing his best with that hat

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Okay I know he’s like a master of disguise and all but like he doesn’t seem to be doing much to actually... hide? Still love his wiggly sword style

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Um take the kid and fucking run maybe????

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*stalks you from a not very inconspicuous distance*

Didja miss me?

No

----------

Hate to see you leave but love to watch you go

----------

Fuck I hate being disarmed.

----------

This place looks strangely similar to the woodshed...

---------

The fuck are you?

Wouldn’t you like to know?

Yes I would. That’s why I asked

----------

There’s just nothing quite like a near death experience to bring people together.

----------

Take this kid and run!

But sir, you don’t seem to understand! I am the Best Boy! I simply cannot just leave you to die.

----------

Don’t worry kid! You can’t get in trouble anymore! Your dad is fuckin dead! Surely that’ll bring you some comfort!

----------

Random Local Boatman is surprisingly honorable and happens to be in debt to the father of the kid who was nice to you that morning.

Life sure is weird.

----------

He doing him best

---------

Though it is absolutely understandable, he reacts to being touched by that paper the way I react to walking into a spider web.

-------

Gramps is a badass

-----------

I do have to say these guys do seem to be much better trained than the usual evil henchmen. And you have to appreciate their aesthetic.

----------

Seriously!! The best boy!!!!!

This man has helped in a little bit exactly once to repay him for his own kindness an this little teenager is willing to just die for him without hesitation.

Like no, son, the two old men are doing this so that YOU live. You have it backwards.

----------

Surpriiiiise I’m stalking you too!

----------

Oh no the henchmen are falling into the drawing things out to emotionally torture their prey thing. Don’t y’all know that giving the protagonist time to recover and/or study your moves is how you die? Did you even GO to henchman school?

----------

ahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Just.. omg. The noise he made. “Dwaaah!!!”

------------

Okay kid I know you’re young and under a lot of stress and never really got into the whole martial arts training thing but grandpa is doing better than you literally laying down and covered in cuts. Just sayin

----------

Aw nuts

---------------

*ding*

Please take your protagonist out of the oven as cooktime has been completed.

----------

The fighting editing style seems to be a weird splice of nice crisp slowmotion view of the action and spliced together jump cuts and zooms that make for an odd kinda hard to follow combination. But at least I guess they tend to end on ‘cool pose x”

----------

“Hey, Beggar! You’re good at martial arts. Somehow this surprises me even though I already knew that???”

----------

Unexpected trust fall ends better than anticipated

----------

Das gaee

----------

He’s bendin’ over backwards for you!!

--------

Unexpected but definitely varied emotional investments on the fact that Gramps is dying.

----------

Look at him being all humble.

----------

Ooh he could be in a medical drama. That is the perfect like sad close your eyes and head shake no I’m sorry he’s not gonna make it. Bravo.

Very delicate.

----------

“Don’t fuckin’ touch me”

----------

I’m guilt tripping you into a found family and you’re gonna like it punk

---------

Sick dude, whats your name? Shit no one’s asked me that before somehow I’m not ready..

Uh.uh... Zhou Xu.

Nailed it.

“Zhou Xu? Naw that doesn’t sound right.”

-----------------

May you learn from this never to underestimate, rob, and otherwise harass your local old boat man for you never know when he may force you through guilt and honor into taking on a ward and a quest under penalty of being haunted by his old ass ghost forever

----------

Uncle Li has died and most of the group is much more upset about it than they would have anticipated that morning.

Poor ChenLing is having a rough day.

------------

RIP Uncle Li. So much for living a carefree couple of years lying drunk in the sun.

It looks like even now you can’t escape your responsibilities Zhou Xu.

----------------

Group of hereto-unknown men arrive in poor time to stop the bonfire

------------

“What’s wrong?” Um... maybe... fire??

------------

I say again, thank you for labeling the people I’m supposed to remember.

Also, why did y’all have to wait for orders before checking out the fuckin boats?

Y’all dumb.

---------------------

Hey, Wen KeXing, Not trying to throw off your groove or anything but maybe a funeral isn’t the best time for flirting? Perhaps? Maybe?

I know you don’t have an ‘off’ switch but maybe a pause button?

-----------------

“are you done?”

“Never.”

----------

It deadass took y’all this long to introduce yourself? You’ve been stalking him all this time and you never thought to go “btw my name Wen KeXing? Comment t’appelles tu?” Come on man

---------------

Our best boy is having his not best day. D:

Don’t worry. Your new family will stalk/care for you.

-----------------

“A-Xiang! Make some food!” “No shit Sherlock I already did.” “My ideas are the best. :D”

--------------

Eat your food!

Eat your food!

Eat your food!!

Eat your FOOD!!!

EAT YOUR FOOD!!!!

WILL SOMEONE PLEASE EAT YOUR GODDAMN FOOD?

-------------

“Oh my GOD we get it you can fucking read! Oh my god.”

---------

If I prove I can read too will you pass me a damn pancake?

Fuck yeah.

----------------

GOD DAMN IT SOMEONE EAT FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK

------------

Um excuse you this group only has room for one little bitch and it ain’t fuckin you, you hear me little girl?

------------

I am very sorry. Thank you for saving my life. I would like to re-assert my status as “best boy”.

HEY WHAT THE FUCK????

-------------------

Wen KeXing: 👀

----------------------------

Please increase your friendship level before asking personal questions.

---------

Nya Nya you were useless when your home was burned to the ground and your family was killed waaaaah how pathetic are you!!

Can you fucking not?

My B.

--------------------

BEST BOY INJURED THIS IS NOT A DRILL

----------

Our Man Zhou ZiShu respects bodily autonomy!

Do not touch my fuckin’ boy or I will fight you!

-----------------

And we end the episode with Wen KeXing being horny on main!

Sir, keep it together. There are children present.

[clickbait-official]

mbc

from @artwitch28's headcannons

masterlist

tw: implied/referenced abuse, depressive themes, and transphobia

---

Endeavor was a stuck up little bitch.

Not that a lot of people knew.

Oh well. He’ll get his revenge one day.

Touya sighs, setting his keys on the counter.

“Keigo! I’m home!”

The house was big- airy, if that was a word. Birdboy hated closed spaces. Touya couldn’t blame him, either; he couldn’t stand anything that looked like his “training” room.

There was a thunk upstairs as Keigo ran down to greet him.

“How was work? How was Dad?” He asks.

“Dad”, Atsuhiro Sako, was Touya’s adopted dad. They worked together under their agency, the League of Heroes. The League of Heroes were made up of heroes who were told they were villains, or considered outcasts.

“It was alright, Big sis Magne started asking people if they wanted interns.” Touya responds to his fiance.

Keigo comes up behind him, hugging him and wrapping his wings around Touya.

“Hmmm. Did you look for an intern, dove? You could get your brother~”

“I didn’t think about it, no. But there’s Toga already. Did you?”

Touya can feel Keigo smile into his shoulder.

“There’s one with a bird quirk.”

“Oh, I see.” Touya smirks.

His stomach rumbles as he does.

“Aww, does my little birdie need some food?” Keigo says, a twinkle in his eye. “I’ll go get you some.”

He grabs his hand and leads him to the kitchen.

They look through the fridge, then the freezer.

“Chinken nuggets?” Keigo asks, after a beat of silence.

“You did not just reference that, again.”

And Keigo laughs, loud and clear. Touya thinks it’s the prettiest thing he’s ever heard.

God, he’s in deep, isn’t he?

They sit together at the counter while they wait for the food to cook. They don’t talk for a bit, just enjoying each other’s company.

“Speaking of Shoto, how’s the family? Rumi’s been talking ‘bout Fuyumi a lot.” Keigo says, taking the pan out of the oven.

“Oh my goodness- remember that crusty kid I was talking to you about? He’s dating Natsuo.” Touya deadpans, and Keigo bursts into giggles.

“God, he could do so much better! And he chose the crustiest kid on this side of Japan!” He rants, Keigo staring from across the table.

“Hana’ll kill you for that.”

Touya sighs again, knowing that he was right. “Yeah, I know. I still don’t know why Natsuo chose her crusty brother, but he’s happy. And it gets him out of the house, too.”

Keigo nods. “Away from Endeavor.”

“Away from Endeavor.”

They sit for a while in silence at that. Touya knows Keigo used to idolize Endeavor, and he knows why.

God, out of all people, couldn’t Keigo have a good childhood?

At least he’s not hurting now.

The sun has fallen, and they’re laying on their bed.

The moonlight filters through the curtains. Keigo’s been asleep for a while now.

The slightest breeze drifts into the room.

If we lived in a harsher world, we’d be so much more cruel.

Oh, what a beautiful night to be alive with you.

---

Touya brings Keigo into the agency. He’d been curious about how it worked- the League was unprecedented.

Touya hoped he’d want to join too. He wouldn’t mind his soon-to-be husband patrolling with him.

Hero work is a dangerous game to play, after all.

The League of Heroes’s building is not very intimidating. It’s survived thunderstorms, 52 mental breakdowns (not by the same person), and now the prank the entire League is in on.

It’s time for the hero charts.

Showtime.

It had taken so much bribing, from the poor intern that worked for one of the higher ups, to one of the higher ups themselves.

Touya could only hope it was worth it.

Oh, it was worth it.

On live television, in front of nearly the entire world, Enji Todoroki, known as Endeavor, had gotten massively pranked.

First, it was the glitter. Then, the water balloons and the rainbow slime. After that, it was the chicken and the three fire extinguishers.

And of course, copious amounts of cheese.

And it was all filmed. It was all broadcasted to a live audience.

Oh- and everyone knew who did it.

But there was no evidence.

God, Touya loved trashing Endeavwhore (and that’s an insult to sex workers).

It was the night after when Twice suggested something Touya had never thought of before.

The night was young, fireflies just beginning to come out. They were on the balcony, drinking and catching up like family would.

“Hey,” He said, “Why don’t you sue him? Get your bro outta that place and over here.”

Twice was a genius.

Twice was a goddamn genius.

Headlines were all over the place. “Endeavor gets sued?” “Enji Todoroki- an abusive piece of shit?” “Endeavor loses custody!”

God, the journalists were having a fucking field day with this. Touya can’t blame them, though.

The day was beautiful. Birds were singing, flowers were blooming, and little kids were running around outside. Keigo was sitting next to him, listening to his music. Touya finished up some paperwork to finally, finally get his siblings out from under Endeavor.

Thankfully, there was enough evidence to prove he was at least neglectful. People could finally see just how much of an asshole he was, and how high his civilian casualty and endangerment rates are.

There was one teeny, tiny, thing.

The Commission.

The only reason Endeavor was still in the top ten is because of that fucking Commission.

God, he hated the Commission. The things they did to Keigo, the scars that still remain on his psyche.

Fuck the Commission.

It just- It made him so angry. The way Toga and Spinner were treated, how Twice wasn’t able to get help until he became a hero- God, he hated it.

And he didn’t even know how bad it was! He was sheltered from Quirkist attitudes. Well, as sheltered as you can be, living with Endeavor as a dad.

He only knew a little bit of how much they had suffered under this system. He knew there was something more to how Twice always stayed in his hero costume, or how Magne avoided that one part of town. How Toga stared at that one schoolyard for a little too long before walking away.

And he hated it. So, so much.

Fuck the Commission.

---

It’s Touya’s first free day. The hecticness of moving all of his sibling’s stuff into their house was crazy. Who knew that keeping a house was so hard? Not him, that’s who.

So, like any rational person, he goes out to catch up with a close friend.

He had met her during his time at U.A. Her name was Hana Shimura. They bonded through their shitty parents. She was the older sister of the crusty fuck, Tenko.

Why did Natsuo decide to date him? He'll never know.

Somehow or another, the conversation went from how their days went to when Tenko got his quirk.

“Yeah, he decayed the dog! Thankfully he froze up after, so I got Mom. If he didn’t freeze up, I’d be dead.”

The way she had said it- so casually...She probably was terrified at the time.

“There was a UA student that helped him, too. Oboro? I think that was his name...Anyway, Oboro really helped him! He’s kinda a father to him, if I’m being honest.” She went on, telling Touya how proud of Tenko she was.

How he had become a search and rescue hero, which he already knew, and using his quirk he had helped so many people! Because he can decay the debris trapping civilians and rescue them!

They walk down the street, still talking about their siblings and generally how life was going.

They were gonna meet up with Twice. There was a new restaurant that he noticed during his patrols.

Touya heard it was pretty good from Fuyumi and Rumi.

It looked pretty nice, too. He’d walked by it a few times.

“So how is Twice, anyway? I don’t hear much from him these days.” Hana says, pushing open the door to the restaurant.

“Guess you’ll find out, huh?”

Twice is sitting at an empty table in a corner. He was smart enough to change out of his hero costume, just like Touya and Hana.

He lifts his head as they get closer to the table.

“Hey guys! How’ve you been!” He greets them as they sit down.

“Good, good. We were talking about my brother, Tenko.” Hana says. Touya nods in agreement.

“And also how he got to be a hero, too.”

“Did I ever tell ya how I got to be a hero?” Twice asks them, barely containing a smile.

He never told them, well, not Touya.

Turns out, when he was having trouble with his Quirk, one of his doubles went and got a hero license. At the time he was barely of the streets, so he became a hero, joining up with Mr. Compress and Magne to create the League of Heroes.

Because why not? It kept him off the streets and he could help people like him.

A win-win for Twice.

Touya hated how his weird uncle was treated before he became a hero.

Because he was a person, like anyone else. Just a person.

So why was he treated so differently? Why didn’t people help him when he needed it?

God, Touya was so tired.

---

It’s late one night. Touya is alone with his adopted father.

“Dad, why’d you decide to be a hero?” He asks out of the blue.

Atsuhiro’s eyes mist over, and Touya worries for him. Touya’s told him all about the horrific shit he’s gone through, and he can’t help but wonder if he had gone through something horrible too.

Atsuhiro takes out a silver locket, and gently pries it open. He points at the picture inside.

“Look! It’s them…My perfect little family... That’s them! There’s my little girl, and the most beautiful person to ever exist. There they are…”

It’s silent for a moment, the only thing one could hear were the cicadas far away from here.

Touya opens his mouth, “What...What happened to them?”

“A hero. He didn’t care for protocol. He killed- He killed them! And no one believed me…” Atsuhiro trails off, looking down at the floor.

Touya can’t help but feel sorrow, too. He could’ve had a mom, another sister...

He really needs to stop adopting people.

He can’t imagine the pain Mr. Compress must’ve been in. To lose a lover, a child? Oh, it must hurt- so, so much. To lose what was essentially a part of you?

Oh, it hurts to even imagine.

“...They’re really pretty, Dad.”

“They...were both so beautiful in this picture. Toga reminds me of her, y’know? They are both so pretty, so grown-up, and have that same sense of humor…”

Touya’s not sure to who he’s referring to, but nods anyway.

Who’s he to question grieving old men?

“And the days fly by so fast now, I can’t help but feel as though I’m supposed to be insulted by it. But I can’t bring myself to care anymore…It hurts, Touya, it hurts. Sometimes...I can hardly bring myself out of bed...I feel like a ghost…”

It’s silent for a moment, before Touya speaks.

“Dad, I think you need to get help. This isn’t normal. And…I think they’d want you to be happy too, Dad. Don’t you deserve to be happy, too?”

“...I don’t know.”

“You don’t...know?”

“I don’t think I am. But...I want you to be happy. And Tenko, and Hana, and Twice, and Magne...But it’s so tiring, being happy. And I don’t know what to do!”

His sobs seem to echo through the building.

“Come on, Dad. Let’s get you help. You can get some rest.”

He leads Sako back to his house, Atsuhiro being half-asleep by the time they get home.

Mr. Compress takes the spare bedroom, and falls asleep as soon as he hits the pillow. Keigo notices Touya, and walks over to him.

“Heya dove~ How was your day?”

“Worrying. Dad...Dad needs some help. He’s got some shit going on...He’s so tired, Kei. We need to get him therapy or something.”

“Oh, baby…” Keigo whispers, but Touya is too tired to hear.

He falls asleep in his fiance’s arms, safe and sound.

---

The house is abuzz with activity when Touya wakes up. Keigo’s laughter echoes around the place, filling the air with a sense of home.

What a beautiful way to wake up.

Touya gets dressed and walks downstairs. Keigo’s in the kitchen, talking amicably with his sister, Fuyumi. Dad was smiling fondly at the sight, picking at his food. Natsuo was talking on the phone with someone, blushing a little.

Keigo turns towards him, and oh, he was so handsome.

“Good morning, dovely~”

Unbelievable. It was too early for puns.

“Ugh, no. Don’t ever make puns this early. Dad, you doing okay?”

Atsuhiro looks over at him, the corners of his eyes crinkling.

“I’m doing just fine, sonny boy~”

“God, it’s too early for this shit. Keigo, get me some coffee, will you?”

“Language!” Fuyumi scolds.

Eventually the coffee is made, and tables cleaned. Breakfast is done.

Keigo helps set up an appointment with Fuyumi. She’s a part time therapist, part time substitute teacher.

Touya takes a deep breath. One day, Dad will be okay. He’ll be alright.

Time for work.

It’s a beautiful, sunny day when Touya goes on patrol again. This time with Magne and the new intern, Toga.

He already knew somewhat what the girls had gone through.

“Good morning, Magne, Toga.” He greeted them.

“Good morning!” Toga says, and then they go off.

Touya’s stuck in his thoughts as they walk to a coffee house while on break. He listens in as he reaches for the door.

“Yeah, my parents threw me out cause they didn’t think I was a girl.”

“My parents threw me out, too! I had to run away, they didn’t like my quirk very much...I got lucky, and Mom became my mom! That’s how I became a hero! How did you, big sis Magne?”

“Mr. Compress saved me from one of those fucking creeps. He let me stay with him for a while, and helped me get back on my feet. I decided to be a hero then, to help people like me.”

They sit down at one of the tables, still talking about their lives. Touya takes a bite of his muffin.

Ah, life was alright, if just for a little while.

--- requests & asks are open! (request em here) ---

@kirililbb

[danwylds]

Right okay I never actually got myself to write this fic so have my notes for the fic except I haven’t read through them since June when I wrote them and I refuse to edit anything

Right is bakery au but not

Neil either turned down the offer of exy for the foxes or for coach whatever the fuck his name was

He got caught earlier tho which is . Unfortunate

Stuart still comes in

Maybe I’ll have him move back to Britain for a while? To avoid the moriyamas n stuff

He NEVER misses a match of the ravens/foxes tho

Which leads to him seeing the frankly sickening interview of Kevin and riko

Neil is like yo Stuart let me start smth

Stuart is like Neil the only reason you’d go back to the states right now is if you did smth that you could hide and you can’t do that for shit

So Neil is like yk what I’m gonna find a way bc I’m not letting this kid go through this (Andrews quite into this idea when it’s shared)

So he says yo. Stuart. Uncle. Sir. Let me open a bakery or something in the states

Stuart is like no you fucking idiot

And Neil is like but c o n s i d e r

You can get info or smth

Just have another business in the states yk

AND I’d get out of your hair

And Stuart is like hm okay but you’ve gotta live in a complex I choose for you

And Neil is all only if I can choose where it’s gonna be

It’s a deal

He (very obviously) chooses a place near palmetto

Stuart is tired but is like he’ll be under protection n shit so I guess??? And he’s not stupid enough to start something right. Right.

Wrong.

Anyways.

It’s a bakery that starts out kinda slow

But Neil finds he likes baking and Stuart pays for his nephew to have some sort of normal life so it doesn’t matter too much

Renee starts to frequent it

At first it’s to pick up sweets for Andrew

But eventually she starts bringing Allison on dates there bc they have a cute little seating area (figure where Seth fits in? I think he’ll survive?)

Uhhh what’s a timeline

I think this’ll be around the winter holidays (Jewish neil? Look into it)

So thanksgiving will have happened . I think Andrew agreed to go Not bc he particularly wanted to but bc he cares for Nicky and knows he’ll probably go anyways

Yeah so thanksgiving. h

Andrew JUST got off his drugs and he’s so damn protective of his own that he hardly even leaves their sides

Edens is a def no for em

Meanwhile Neil is tentative friends w Renee who has brought all the upperclassmen there a few times

Allison bullies him for his clothing but it’s okay he deserves it

Renee is sweet and stops em from doing anything too drastic which Neil appreciates

Matt,, my baby,, he’s so happy he just asks Neil about random stuff

Dan is sweet too!!

Seth kinda hates him but Neil hasn’t paid enough attention to return the favor

One day close to the winter banquet the upperclassmen are like yeah Neil we’re gonna go to this thing and it should be really fun!! Oh you know what? Our teammate Nicky needs a date and his cousin doesn’t really like anyone from his class and he’s super fucking crazy abt it so if that doesn’t deter you then you should totally join !

Neil is like oh chance to fuck up Riko? Absolutely I’ll go

ALLISON DRESSES HIM

HE LOOKS SO GOOD

when he and Allison emerge from the girls room Aaron is like Who is that

And Allison is “oh nickys date (:”

Andrew gets twitchy and holds a knife to her throat

Renee is like Andrew I stg get away from my gf and Seth is like manic pixie nightmare fuel I’m gonna beat the shit outta you

And Neil is just like same shit every day I guess

And he’s like so you’re Nicky then? COMPLETELY IGNORING YK. ALL THAT

Andrew is like “he is. Don’t touch him”

And Neil straight up says I don’t think you get to set boundaries for people, actually

And Neil has no idea what the effect is of that on Andrew but it’s enough to make him glare

Which is terrifying to everyone but Neil bc again. Dumbass

Anyways Neil very purposely hooks his arm through nickys and they head off to the bus

Dunno what happens there but I’ll figure it out

RIKOOO ROASTTT **AIRHORNNNNSSS**

It’s glorious

Kevin and riko are like who the FUCK are you

And Neil is all wouldn’t you like to know weather boy

They relocate and they’re all like . Ah. That’s why you and Renee get along

It’s kinda funny ngl

Andrew doesn’t think so but fuck him

I think that they head back to the bus when this shit I’d over and wymack is like excuse me what the fuck

And Aaron in german is like thank god he never joined the team bc I could not handle more of that

And Neil in German is like would you believe me I’d I told you I was almost signed

And Andrew is like I fucking Knew it I hate it here

N e ways things go back to normal for the most part

The upperclassmen still show up

Seth has a bit of grudging respect for him

It’s later that all the foxes are getting drunk from a lose that Renee calls him and is like Neil please can I usher them inside for a bit I think they need a place to chill so we don’t get yelled at for being too loud in the dorms

And Neil is like uhh sure why not

It turns out it was not just the upperclassmen

He gives them all water bottles and whatever and lets them lounge around

Gives em some food which they pay for w the coachs card

Uhhh idk time passes and some of the foxes pass out so neil is like y’all can chill in the break room? They have couches

He stays out there bc the bakery is still open

Andrew comes out like hey fuck you but also can I get more of those pastries

Idk I want them to be in love already

Uhh yeah I think they don’t say anything until

“what happened to your face”

“A truth for a truth?”

“If you must insist”

“Fine, my father tried to kill me”

Andrew raises his eyebrow but neils like bitch you said a truth for a truth it’s your turn now

Neil asks him why he wears arm bands

We get the whole knives and scars

They’re quiet again

I don’t know man let them be in love

Uhhh okay

I think Andrew will tell neil like

“[code]”

“Huh”

“That’s the code for the court, Kevin practices at night.”

Neil is like how would you know I’d enjoy playing exy? And andrew is like dipshit that’s how we met

I’m running out of ideas oh no

Maybe they play a couple of night game things

Exchange a few more truths

OHHH OKAY COOL SO THEN NEIL CAN GO TO EDENS W THEM THE WHOLE “DOESNT MEAN I WOULDNT BLOW YOU” THING CAN STILL HAPPEN

sick okay! They start dating but since Baltimore happened earlier they never actually come out to the rest of the team

I like to think when they play against the ravens again neils like haha babe you can have as many sweets as you want if you shut down the goal

Also Neil says it’s hot which is like a big thing to persuade Andrew but shhhhh

Yeah the foxes win they celebrate by getting drunk and they all show up at neils like hello again (:

Same thing happens but this time andrew and Neil are together and basically are doing nothing but making out

At least the store is closed

Nicky comes out and just YELLS

YALLLLLL COME LOOK @ THIS SHIT

Allison wins SO much money

Yeah idk how to end this but happily ever after :3

If you want me to turn this into a fic I will!

[violexides]

The DreamSMP Explained (By Someone Who Has Never Watched Any DreamSMP Stream)

cracks knuckles. okay, fucking FINALLY doing this. ahem. 

Couple things to preface with, will keep this brief. 

This isn’t entirely blind. One of my best friends has helped out in places, just because I wanted to hit on everything (accurate or not), and I know mutuals/friends who post and write about DreamSMP (though how much of that is AU or canon-typical, I can’t say. I can’t tell). I’ve never seen a single stream, but I’ve seen a few clips. So, my understanding is a bit more than the title may imply, but still not a lot. Sorry.

Also, this will be very, very long (near 2k words). All under the cut, will TW this with themes of abuse, death, manipulation, unreality, hallucinations, and me having an abrasive sense of humor where I revel in the glee of calling these guys European twinks. Though, speaking of. This is ALL about the actual characters, not the people. I don’t know anything about most of these actual streamers, so, no hate to them. In fact, I think they’re pretty cool for having come up with a… somewhat coherent… narrative, all through using Minecraft as a medium. Anyway.

Sigh. Without further ado, 

So. There’s this place. Made by Philza, AKA God, AKA one of like six different gods. Philza, born from the womb acting like someone’s 43 year old uncle, has three kids. Wilbur, Tommy, and Tubbo. There are other people here, with some scattered ancestry that raises some questions, but I don’t really care who fucked an Enderman and had an 8’0 tall kid (Ranboo DNI).

There are also places! Sometimes! On a good day, there are actual, intact locations. We’ve got hits like “The Badlands”, which I think was taken from about three different dystopian novels I read in third grade, “El Rapids” (Quackity, Subpoena (autocorrect wins this round), and Karl made this one), “Pogtopia”, no comment on this one, and “L’Manberg”, which Wilbur made. 

Only one of these is going to be important.

So, might be a good time to say this: I don’t know what the inciting incident of DreamSMP is? I don’t know what was the catalyst for all this shit, but I’m going to take a guess and say Wilbur blowing up L’Manberg had something to do with it.

… That’s going to be a pattern, by the way. Just. Stick with me here. 

So, Wilbur is an older child who read the Hamlet parts in literature class and can only cope by ripping down the very creations he has and taking the entire world down with him to hell. Which is to say, he throws a pity party after Jschlatt (some bitch who abused Quackity, that’s another trend, yippee) wins an election and decides to blow up the fucking kingdom and kill Jschlatt.

Little does Wilbur know, the devil may work fast, but Jschlatt getting a fucking stroke and dying out of nowhere works faster. 

I’m not kidding. He gets a stroke, he dies, and Tubbo takes over. I’ve tried to puzzle out the government structure of DreamSMP for a while and have drawn zero conclusions. In any case, Wilbur also tells Philza, his… father…, to kill him. And Philza fucking does? For some reason, like, holy shit.

Anyway. Wilbur is now a ghost. So is Jschlatt. The… life system, on this server, is really strange and I don’t know how to fully explain it. Just know that nothing has permanence here. 

I’m going to throw this out here because I don’t know when it’s relevant, but I wrote down something about Karl being in a place called the In Between. I don’t know how the hell he got there or what the hell he’s doing. This might be where the discs are? I can’t explain the discs. I… think they are fighting over the discs? Don’t know why, Wilbur makes music himself, I feel like you have enough to go around.

(Stream Saline Solution it reminds me of my best friend only if you want okay thx)

L’Manberg gets blown up again. This time, Techno did it. He did it just after giving this speech about Theseus, which, jokes aside-- the writing of DreamSMP is actually really good. That was all done on improv, and I did watch an animatic with some of the audio from it, and damn. I’m a whore for metaphor and I love this for him.

This happens, and Ranboo and Tommy decide to do a little hehe and burn down George’s house. Who is George? Good question: a king. Of what? Good question: call me the antithesis of a Ranboo kinnie and get me some discs because I hear no answers.

Dream gets pissed off by this (who gave him authority, I don’t know) and builds a wall. He for some reason decides that if Tommy, and only Tommy, breaks some rules, the wall will stay up forever. So, naturally, Tommy immediately yells at him, and Tubbo gets pissed (what happened to the whole, who are you without me, yourself, thing?). Dream exiles him, which is bad enough, but then Dream burns down his house, so now he’s double exiled.

Dream kins Julius Caesar but Julius Caesar does not kin Dream and I think that’s important. 

(It had to be important enough for me to literally go back and edit this in, for no reason, because I think I’m really fucking hilarious.) 

Techno takes in Tommy and shows him his super secret cave of evil, which Tommy promptly screams at. Philza and Ranboo visit sometimes, but mostly Tommy just sits there. Dream says “fuck you” to Techno, but Techno decides to wage war on L’Manberg, so Quackity and co. come over to try and kill Techno, but Techno kills Quackity with a pickaxe, but Quackity has three lives for some reason, and then Dream blames Ranboo for blowing something up for literally zero reason, and can you tell how tired I am.

Ranboo sees a smiley face in his notebook and zones the fuck out while Dream tries to kill… Tommy? No, Tubbo. No, fuck, no it was Tommy. I don’t know why people suddenly care about it n- NO, NO IT WAS TUBBO, he is TRYING to kill TUBBO. 

I hate Europeans. 

Ahem. Dream goes to jail, but he has books in jail, which is a horrible idea. Everyone knows that if you give a war criminal some novels he’ll accidentally haunt someone else’s dreams and launch psychological warfare with the prison guard, Sam, who has zero idea what he’s doing because he probably didn’t sign up for this.

Also, I’m gonna say this here because I don’t know when it will fit in. There’s this place. Called… the Egg. Now, I don’t know what goes on in the Egg. I don’t know what the Egg is. I don’t know who decided to name all these fucking things, because I think the Egg is just a box made of bedrock. I think Ranboo hallucinates about it, but Ranboo hallucinates about everything so I’m not really sure. I’m going to call it here and say that this is probably a bad sign.

People are trying to talk to Dream. First BadBoyHalo, who gives Ranboo this little note from Dream with a smiley face. Or maybe that was SapNap. Either way, Ranboo hallucinates seeing Dream, and then actually sees Dream but he thinks he’s hallucinating? I don’t know. 

Then we get Tommy. Basically he kind of comes in here and Sam, being a good prison guard, allows Dream to beat Tommy to death and then revive him (don’t ask about the revivals just pretend it makes sense please). He tells Tommy he’s also going to revive Wilbur which Tommy isn’t a big fan of, considering that Wilbur, uh. Vague hand gestures. You get the schtick. Hopefully. I don’t know.

Anyway. Uh. Quackity loses his shit, also.

As in he talks to Jschlatt, the ghost of his abusive husband. Makes a deal-- if Quackity here loses, he revives Jschlatt. I don’t know what the winning conditions are, but, thankfully, they don’t matter because Quackity loses damn near instantly. 

So he goes to Dream and Sam gives him really powerful gear for no reason. Dream is a bit terrified by this situation, and Quackity is like “give me the fucking book”, and then we never find out what happens because Quackity ends up covered in blood about to blow up El Rapids. I hadn’t expected to mark Quackity off on the demolitionist bingo, but hey, all’s fair I guess. My next bets are on Tubbo or whichever bitch became god of the sea. 

(I also made a joke to my friend about me kinning Quackity (the character not the streamer could you fucking imagine), to which they said “you’d torture someone for information”? So. I guess Dream, uh. Hm. That explains why Quackity was bloodied. Uh. Oops. Don’t know why he’s playing Poker, though.)

So, for my sanity, as we come to a close, I’m going to start listing lore details that I don’t know nearly enough about but are probably important. Just… bullet point them. Might be a bit tacky of me but I have shit to do, dammit. By that I mean, I don’t have shit to do, but I’ve had this doc open for literally 1-2 weeks and I just want to be freed.

List Of Other Shit That Happened:

Ranboo started an arg, so there’s a character named Z now. Can’t believe the kid I knew in middle school who didn’t know where the Middle East  was made it into the dreamSMP omg! 

Tubbo did something immoral, and we still don’t know who his dad is. By we, I mean me. 

Eret exists. That’s all I’ve got for this one. They’re important. Probably.

Karl hallucinated six versions of himself and left the In Between to go to hell. (Lil Nas X girlboss gaslight gatekeep in this motherfucker!!!)

Ranboo and Tubbo got married because taxes exist </3

More on this last point: they opened a hotel, despite Tubbo being a king, and Tommy got mad at them for getting engaged without his permission. But Tommy was literally dead when they had the wedding so I’m not exactly sure what he was expecting. Either way, he’s fine with it now.

Kids getting adopted oh shit oh fuck. Also, mpreg is canotical. Make this what you will. 

DreamXD is a god now. I don’t know who DreamXD is. I don’t think anybody else does either.

I’m like 60% sure George is dead. 

I’m like 60% sure Philza is immortal.

Going through my ‘notes’ to make sure I didn’t miss anything and I’m just getting more confused, so I think I’m going to call it here. Props to everyone in the dreamSMP for creating kickass lore, I would not summarize any of it ever again if you held me at fucking gunpoint, and thanks to my mutuals/friends for letting me ask a lot of really stupid questions as I try to puzzle this out. And also, another thanks to you all for reading this. I hope to God this was funny. 

I really, really, really fucking hope that Tumblr doesn’t cut this off for a long character count. This is longer than some of my fucking oneshots. My God. This was so fun, don’t get me wrong, but I also want a hit of a candy cigarette. Make it two, actually. Or three. All at once. 

Anyway. Drink some water, stay safe, and remember that statistically speaking, 100% of people with a name starting with “T” need to put down the Greek mythology books and learn about the ethics behind pyromania. Goodbye, Theseus. 

[thevioletjones]

Congrats on the kudos, u deserve it! I did not undestand if I'm supposed to choose one of the lines for the prompt or if I have to combine two or more lines lol. But if it is to choose only one: number 5. If more than one: 5 and 45. *---*

Thank you! I used both. Great inspiration, actually. It spun out of control! 😀

Prompt 2: “How much of that did you hear?” + “Why are you helping me?”

Interloper

“Jesus, Iggy, I’m gonna fuckin’ murder you myself one of these days,” Mickey threatened in exasperation.

They were both leaning over, hands on knees, gasping for air, just having run full-speed for at least twelve blocks. The pillars beneath the L tracks were now providing the mild seclusion they needed to wait out a cursory police search of the area.

“Ain’t my fault!” Iggy exclaimed defensively.

Mickey’s face scrunched up to a degree that only his dumbest family members could make it reach. “Yes it fuckin’ was! Who else’s fault would it be?”

He’d always kind of wondered how he was the only one in his crap-ass family to be gifted with at least half a brain. Well, him and his younger sister, Mandy. She was alright. Skanky and crazy, but not a total idiot. He couldn’t say the same for his brothers, male cousins, father, uncle, etcetera. Mickey couldn’t even get his begrudgingly favorite brother to follow a simple goddamn plan that would’ve kept them out of trouble when they were out committing crimes. He was just gonna have to start doing everything himself. Safety in numbers didn’t apply when the other member of your team seemed to have been lobotomized when no one was paying attention. It was probably all the meth. Mickey was smart enough to stay away from that particular bullshit. Didn’t want to become a scabby, denture-wearing, toothpick skinny, low-life with no mind left to lose. He was content to stick to coke and weed like a normal person.

“That old bitch came outta nowhere! Self-defense!”

“It ain’t self-defense if you’re robbin’ the joint, numbnuts! We’re lucky you fuckin’ missed!”

If he had it his way, Mickey wouldn’t be doing these petty robberies anymore. He much preferred bigger jobs, like gun and drug running. But times were tough, and he had to do what he had to do. He’d even considered getting a legit job for once in his life, but the skills he possessed weren’t exactly easily adaptable to the straight and narrow path. Being a criminal was how he was raised, and all he knew. It brought heat, but it was still a comfortable fit. Living without the constant presence of major risk would probably feel so foreign as to drive him crazier than a meth addiction in the long run.

The job Mickey’d lined up involved hitting up a few different borderline upmarket stores that’d opened up in their neck of the woods since the gentrifiers had set upon The Yards, then selling the goods to a guy he knew in the online black market trade. Not as lucrative as heavy metal and funny powder, but a decent payday nonetheless. Except fuckface over here who had to ruin everything by getting trigger-happy on Main while they were attempting to heist merchandise from location number two of three. If the pigs nabbed either one of them, they’d be going down for at least five to ten. Years. Mickey was done donating years to the prison industrial complex. The most he could afford was months at best.

“When’d you turn into such a giant asshole?” asked Iggy. “Oh, nevermind, probly when you started gettin’ it railed on the reg.”

A giant smile stretched across his perpetually dirty face, causing Mickey’s eyebrows to lift dangerously high on his forehead. Occasionally, his dumber-than-rocks older brother managed to think up some admittedly clever asides. Mickey didn’t know whether to punch him or give him daps.

Before he could decide, however, he heard a distinct little snicker from the other side of the large concrete column they were leaning on, raising his hackles to invisibly join his eyebrows in their heightened incredulity.

Mickey hastily rounded the pillar and grabbed the giggler by the shirt collar, hauling him to their side and pinning him next to Iggy with his forearm. He looked into the guy’s eyes, and finally registered who it was. He kinda sorta knew him from around town. Used to hang out with his sister back in high school. He was a lot scrawnier then. This version of the dude could probably hold his own with Mickey in a fight. He’d built some definite muscle.

“How much of that did you hear, asshole?” Mickey demanded, seeing Iggy flash the gun in his waistband in his periphery.

This idiot didn’t look as rattled as he should be, though. He just shrugged his shoulders.

“Considering I was here first, I guess… all of it?”

He was wearing an annoying little smirk, his green-blue eyes shining bright, and his red hair distracting Mickey as much as the light dusting of freckles across his nose and cheeks. He had a stupidly ultra-defined chin, and Mickey immediately hated it. His chin hadn’t looked like that when he was a 15-year-old pipsqueak.

“Wipe that smile off your face, bitch,” ordered Mickey, pressing his arm harder against the guy’s pale throat. “You think this is fuckin’ funny? You know who we are?”

The guy shrugged again, like this was all a casual conversation on the corner. “Mickey.” He glanced at his dumb, blonde, curlicue brother. “And Iggy, right? I used to hang out with Mandy all the time. Have a good memory.”

“Yeah? Well I remember your goofy ass too, Gallagher. I know where you live and I know who your family is, so if you know what’s good for you, you’ll keep your big mouth shut or I’ll pick ‘em off one by one and save you for last. Got it?”

The dude snorted, and Mickey wondered if he was some kind of crazy tweaker with no sense of propriety or self-preservation.

“You outta your goddamn mind or somethin’?” Mickey added. “I ain’t jokin’.”

“Look, Gallaghers don’t snitch, alright?” He held his hands up placatingly. “I promise not to say shit to anyone. It’s none of my business, and I really don’t care. That good enough for you?”

Mickey loosened his hold, but sized him up all the while. “Maybe. But it’s possible you need a little lesson to remember it good. Wouldn't want you to forget about the consequences of you breakin’ your word.”

The dude winced and shoved Mickey off. “I don’t need a fucking beatdown, Mickey. I get it.”

“Ohhhh,” Mickey singsonged derisively, meeting Iggy’s gaze. “He gets it.” He thumbed his eyebrow. “Guess I’m just s’posed to believe you, huh?”

“That would be ideal, yeah.”

Mickey had to give it to him; he almost cracked a smile. The kid had balls. Most people around their neighborhood cowered before a Milkovich like spring lambs. Still, he lived by a code, and letting some rando walk away unscathed when he had dirt on him just didn’t fit the rules.

He cocked his fist back to knock it into tall, pale, and red’s pearly white teeth, just as the stunted siren of a cop car rang out very close by. Their collective heads all snapped toward the sound, and after sharing a meaningful look between brothers, Iggy took off running once again, without a word.

Normally, Mickey would’ve followed hot on his heels, but some unknown force was keeping his useless feet stuck to the dirty ground, eyes watching as Gingerballs glanced around the column at the flashing lights, taking a very long look that wasn’t suspicious at all.

Before he could react outwardly, Mickey was pulled against a hard body, Gallagher’s warm breath sending a shiver down his spine as he whispered, “Be cool. I got you.”

Suddenly, big hands were caressing Mickey’s back, and despite a part of him not minding in the least, the rest of him stiffened considerably.

“What the fuck are you doing?” he rasped out, hearing the telltale slam of a car door, and attempting to pull away. But a strong grip held him close, spinning him around so that he was the one up against the concrete now.

“Saving your thug ass. I know this guy, okay? Just chill and follow my lead.”

Okay, what the hell was this surreal turn of events? Gallagher was bold as shit, cradling Mickey all gay like. Sure, Iggy had made a fag joke earlier, kicking off this whole… whatever it was, but still. This guy had no way of knowing it was based in reality. Did he?

And had Gallagher really been gay this whole time? How had Mickey never sniffed this scorching information out?

“What’s going on here, boys?”

The copper rounded the corner, genuinely swinging his nightstick like a cartoon character, and Mickey had to suppress a deep roll of his eyes.

“Milkovich?” Mr. CPD continued, extreme disbelief coloring his voice.

Mickey was abruptly reminded that he was currently stuck between a rock and a hard body, and nothing about their entanglement screamed anything other than gay, gay, super-fucking-gay. Not that Mickey hadn’t come to accept who he was and what he liked, but he didn’t go around spreading the truth all over town either. This could seriously damage his carefully crafted reputation.

“Tony!” Ian interjected, sparing him from having to invent some lame excuse, and the cop’s eyes snapped to him instead.

“Ian?” His tone was still dripping with astonishment.

“Yeah! What's up? How you been?”

Mickey shot him an ‘are you goddamn serious right now?’ look, and Ian just squeezed his hip in tacit reply.

“Uhhh… gooood? Care to explain whatever…” he waved his stick between them, “this is?”

Ian laughed and he figured the dude truly was a nutcase. Mickey was going to jail for sure.

“Um, well,” answered Ian, suddenly playing it very meek and demure, “Mickey and I were just… you know…”

“You and… Mickey?”

“Not fucking or anything! Just... hanging out?”

“Hanging out.”

“Yeah, you know how it is. I’m tryin’ to convince Mick here to come home with me, but he’s being squirrelly.” He shook his head and shrugged. “South Side guys.”

“What the fuck?” Mickey whispered harshly, completely taken aback.

Ian just squeezed him tightly again, which was not helping his whole brain scramble situation.

“Huh,” said Tony, a tone of acceptance seeping in. “Mickey Milkovich, eh? Wow.”

“Come on, Tony. I don’t have to tell you this is all a big secret, do I?” replied Ian.

“And blondie who ran away like there was a damn fire? Did he flee a threesome?”

Mickey frowned and fake-wretched, finally speaking up. “Fuck no, man. That was my dumbass brother. He don’t like cops.”

“Uh huh. And you and your brother didn’t happen to be getting into trouble about 15 minutes ago, did you?”

“No sir,” Mickey said with a mock salute.

Ian kicked at his foot in warning.

“He’s been with me since like 3 o’clock, Tone. Scout’s honor.”

Officer Tony eyed them both with a look of skepticism, but didn’t contradict Ian’s word. The CB sounded from the open window of the black and white, with some cop-speak crackling over the airwaves.

“Stay put,” said Tony, eyes lingering longer on Mickey’s than Ian’s. “Both of you.”

He retreated to answer the radio call, and Mickey let out a deep whoosh of air.

“Goddamn, Gallagher. You’re spinnin’ quite a yarn here.”

“Yep,” Ian agreed. “A big gay yarn.”

“How the fuck did you know—”

“That you’re gay? Well, I heard Iggy make that joke, obviously. Pretty specific bottom joke to make if you weren’t actually into it. Plus, I always had my suspicions.”

Mickey scoffed. “Yeah fuckin’ right!”

“I did!”

“Whatever. Why are you helping me?”

“Out of the kindness of my heart?”

“Try again.”

“I don’t know. Why not? Makes us even or something. Now you know I won’t rat you out. About any of it. I wouldn’t out someone like that, and I don’t give a shit about the illegal crap you’re wrapped up in. Tony Markovich is like turbo gay too. Used to bang my sister, I think, but he came out a couple years ago. He won’t let it slip about you. He’s not a total bastard just cuz he’s a cop, ya know?”

Mickey bit his lip in contemplation. Gallagher seemed pretty genuine. Still didn’t much make sense in his brain, but whatever.

“Fine. But you know what’s gonna happen if—”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, kick my ass, kill my family, got it.”

“You’re a cocky little shit, ain’t you?”

Ian smirked again, and it was pretty sexy, actually. “Maybe.”

He had the gall to push against Mickey more fully, pressing the bottom halves of their bodies closer together.

Mickey gasped. “Gonna have to ask you again… what the hell do you think you’re doin’?”

“You wanna go out sometime?”

Mickey cackled in his face. “You’re off your fuckin’ rocker for sure.”

“Am not! I can tell you want me.”

“Oh, Jesus Christ. Cocky little shit doesn’t even begin to cover it, does it?”

“Come onnnn,” Ian prodded.

“Do I look like I date, Gallagher?”

“A date can be whatever we want it to be, Milkovich. I’m easy.”

“Yeah, I bet you are.”

“Okay,” Tony interrupted, coming back into view. “Get the hell outta here. You wanna bang, do it indoors somewhere, or I’ll have to arrest you for public indecency or worse. And Milkovich… if I find any evidence of what I’m sure you know I’m talking about, I’ll be paying your ass a visit real soon.”

Mickey let the eyeroll loose then, withholding a flip of his middle finger, and deadpanning instead, “Don’t know what you’re talkin’ about, officer.”

Tony sighed loudly. “Whatever.”

“Thanks, Tony!” Ian cried at his retreating back.

“You always kiss cop ass like that? Cuz that’s not the way to get into my pants, Red.”

Ian just grinned, finally pulling his body away as he looked around. “You gonna follow me home or what?”

Mickey wanted to tell him to go fuck himself and swagger away like a badass. But was he not a thirsty man being propositioned by a hot guy who just randomly saved his ass from a trip to the slammer?

He at least feigned protest, huffing and puffing as he kicked at the dirt. “Goddamn it, Gallagher, you drive a hard bargain.”

Ian’s face lit up like a Christmas tree, as Mickey added, “Lead the way, weirdo.”

[go-bonkers-go-foolish]

highlights of starkid’s black friday part two

here we go boys

i’m gonna be real the first time i watched this i had no fucking clue what was happening for a solid two and a half minutes

shoutout to whoever choreographed this because i love it

THIS MAN’S NAME IS CHRISTOPHER KRINGLE

robert’s inflection combined with the exaggerated hand gestures is the single funniest thing i’ve ever seen

THE ELVES’ NAMES ARE JINGLE AND JANGLE I’M GONNA CRY

i would pay so much money to see this movie

“thaaaaaaaaat’s right :^)”

the love interest’s name is NOELLE bitch i’m hollering

how does lauren look so adorable in that stupid elf costume??

these lyrics are fucking gold man

joey’s literally just vibin

P A S S  C H R I S  K R I N G L E  T H E  B A L L 

santa’s gonna Reconnect With The Teens™

“becky look!!! remember when we carved that?” “yeah...it’s...a penis” “eyyy”

becky’s monologue about her ex-husband...fuck dude

“it’s funny. stanley was the one who made me go to nursing school. that’s how i knew where his femoral artery was.” HOLY SHIT

“you say you killed your family. i hope i killed mine.” D U D E 

Take Me Back absolutely made me break down dude i’m still crying

“if the universe is infinite, then it’s definite, there’s an alternate reality where we’re now a family.”

“if you’re really santa, tell me something only santa would know” GDGJHSLJHSGK

“i knew it. i knew you weren’t santa” WHEN DID THIS BECOME THE CONFLICT I NEED TO SEE THIS MOVIE

“........a red tricycle.” “santa!!!!!!!!!!” (passionate tongue kissing)

so we all agree that wilbur cross is uncle wiley, right

“in short, mr. president, we are trying to stop the birth....of a god.” what a raw line

“If We Have Faith, We Will Be Rewarded With A Cuddly Toy” -the homeless dude, who i’m pretty sure has just been vibin this whole time

god i kind of want a wiggly now

the audience losing their minds at linda being the supreme cult mother

 “please, for the love of god, just let me go.” “oh, i’ve met god. he had nothing nice to say about you.” (THROAT SLASH) 

FUCKIN RAW LINE RIGHT THERE

linda: “you willlllll adoooooore me....” my dumbass, already in love: ok

“unless i get what i- shit it’s gerald”

YES MAAM LIFT THAT LAUREN LOPEZ UP LIKE JESUS

h i p  t h r u s t

hmm i dont like new ethan

wiggly: “hello hannah. let’s be pally-wals.”  me, with a water gun full of holy water: dont try it demon

the way he says “rotten little banana” is terrifying

“i’m going to have to peel you. i’m going to split you in two. i’m going to Eat you, hannah.” WHAT the fuck

hannah’s scream when wiggly threatens her?? chilling

god someone protect this kid

uh yeah Do You Want To Play is genuinely one of the scariest songs i’ve ever heard from a starkid musical, or pretty much any musical. like, this sweet nurse who waited hours in the freezing cold to get a toy for a little girl who lost her sight is about to viciously murder an eleven-year-old in cold blood because of wiggly.

so, theory time. becky’s a nurse. i dont think that even in her altered state she would miss hannah entirely and accidentally inject it into her own leg. but hannah was wearing the hat. i think ethan was right, it protected her.

joey is scaring me but also giving me some very sexy energy that i’m not opposed to

“Only in america could wiggly take root! Hold this”

“WHEN YOU’RE MADE IN AMERICAAAAAAAAAAAA” fuck yeah!!!!!

“i’m going to cut open your belly-well, and deck the halls with your gutsy-wutsies...” JESUS CHRIST

shoutout to macnamara for literally everything, he’s doing great

can you IMAGINE being president goodman here. like you just found out you’ve killed millions of innocent people and the world is probably going to end in the next hour or so and there’s nothing left to do and all the while this demonic entity is baby-talking to you and laughing that terrifying laugh? yeah, i’d go insane too.

curt mega’s acting is top notch here, dude, he actually scared me

also what the FUCK was that last wiggly laugh

“you better not be fucking with me.....” uh hey sherman i’ll give you five (5) dollars to stop that

“there’s something that’s beautiful, being awake for my funeral” fuck

“still, i thought that angels did exist, but now i hope they plan to end it quick, ‘cause friday is black for me, only my ashes will see the sea” i gotta sit down for a while

“I’m authorizing you to use my firearm.” F U C K  Y E A H

theory: macnamara is hannah’s father (and maybe lex’s) since they can both see into/communicate with the black and white

MONSTERS AND MEN REPRISE

oh my god tim never said he wanted a wiggly oh god oh fuck

“kids don’t want that piece of shit! they’re all into fortnite, dude!” 

If I Fail You also made me cry i’m very emotional over this musical

“answer me, or I’ll open your mouth with my FUCKING KNIFE!” JESUS CHRIST LAUREN

i love that wiggly’s theme is carol of the bells

“look at you! you’re paralyzed with fear!” “no. i’m just lining up my shot.” FUCK YEAH

“you have two choices: abandon your god or burn here with him” this dialogue is so fuckin powerful dude

yeah so all of them burning alive freaked me out but what a way to end a cult

“you know, i have this kooky reclusive biology professor...” when i tell you i YELLED

“wear a watch.” AHHHHHH

what an ending.

anyway stan starkid goodnight

part one

[swamplatibule]

Paramay Prompt Three! Para+Childhood

I HAVE BEEN WRITING THIS FOR FOUR MOTHERFUCKING DAYS NOW AND I HAVE NO REGRETS :DDDD

this has not been proofread it is 10 at night, I am exhausted, please accept my humble offerings

Damn, only prompt three and I’m already forced to reveal everyone’s tragic backstory oh well lol

Trigger warnings: Abuse, arson, su•c•de, death, homophobia, murder, gun mention

tw; death mention

Alright alright alright let’s fuckin goooo we’ll start off with Hollister, her childhood is no doubt the easiest to write since it’s basically been the same her whole life.

She never met her parents. She doesn’t know if they’re dead, or if they just decided they didn’t want a kid, or if something else happened, and she doesn‘t care. It’s not her problem. At least, she tells herself that, but she really isn’t 100% sure that it wasn’t somehow her fault. Poor baby.

She‘s completely grown up in the foster care system, bouncing from home to home. Hollister kept running away, getting caught, and being sent somewhere else. She’s also, guess what, a fucking genius with technology.

One time she tried running away and then erasing herself from the system. It didn’t work, but nobody realized that she’s tried to do it, so it’s fine, nothing went wrong.

A few weeks into her newest home, one of the other foster kids named Silas (who she’d been fast friends with) went missing days after developing a weird anti-gravitational power. And so she tried to find him. She stumbled across the Starwritten Society - when I say “stumbled across” I mean she followed a few very questionable leads on, like, conspiracy theory websites and shit and actually found something - and hacked into the archives, trying to find some sort of info.

Now, you can imagine the panic that caused in the Society. Complete lockdown. The Starwritten Society is top-secret, and nobody just hacks into the archives that easily. She didn’t actually find anything, one because she didn’t get time to look around before the security system actually started working and kicked her out, and two because Silas just wasn’t in the records anyway, meaning he’d disappeared some other way.

However, before she could go out looking for him, there were three agents knocking at the door, having tracked her location here. And you can imagine the looks on their faces when they saw that the person who had caused the mass panic that morning was none other than some kid with a computer that looked home-made.

Things happened, she asked to join because, y’know, fuck yeah secret society, paperwork was filed, and she got in. She’s currently the youngest trainee to join the Society in seventy-four years. Also, fun fact, they had to fill out the adoption papers and such, so she’s listed as the child of Director Iara Adams. Which isn’t that big of a deal, since literally every kid in need of adoption taken in by the Society is adopted under her name, and most have only interacted with her like once, but... it’s a cool world building detail I felt like I needed to add.

Anyways, ONWARD!!!

——————————————

tw; homophobia

Kennedy was born in a pretty influential family with very “traditional” values. They kinda suck, so we won’t get too into that shithole.

Each generation of that family has had like six kids, and every single time, one turns out to be lgbtq+ and gets ✨disowned✨because the parents are just kinda assholes. It’s just this never-ending cycle.

Suffice it to say, Kennedy - being a flaming bisexual and all that - got disowned when she was like twelve after one of her siblings outed her by accident. Her uncle took her in. Guess what? He had also been disowned! When he was fifteen!

And he also went on to become a very important person in the Starwritten Society, and when he discovered Kennedy’s complete genius with technology, he recommended her to become a trainee at 17 years old.

To be honest, Kennedy’s basically gotten the short end of the stick when it comes to characterization and fleshing-out. I have quite a few paras like that, sadly. I think I might make her a playlist sometime and let her be the main character for a while.

——————————————

tw: abuse, arson, su•c•de, murder, gun mention

Fox. Oh boy. Fox grew up in a very... tense household. His father started out pretty okay when he was a younger kid, but he slowly started getting more and more violent and controlling, to both Fox, his twin sister, and his mother.

Fox always had a very close relationship with his sister, Wren. You know that siblings meme? The “You are my sister, you are my brother, we are siblings and we care for each other,”? The were the living definition of that. They managed to keep a definite sense of humor and lightheartedness with each other, despite everything that had been going on.

They weren’t fine, but they had each other.

And then Wren went missing. There was a huge police search, but they didn’t find anything. Fox was fourteen at the time. That experience basically broke him, and he never saw Wren again.

A month later, he was coming home from school, got off the bus, and found the house in smoking ruins. His mother hadn’t been able to take his father’s abuse anymore, and she couldn’t see any way out. So she set the house on fire, killing both herself and her husband.

Fox, who was a mental wreck at this point, as almost anyone would be, was placed into the foster care system. He never stayed anywhere for longer than a week. His humor became a shield for him, an easy way to seem like he was fine when he wasn’t. After about a year, he ran away. And then joined the circus. Why, you ask? Because I said so; I grow these flowers and if you don’t like it then you can leave my garden

Fox was always a flexible kid. He’d been in gymnastics classes since he was five. And, as it would turn out, he was damn good on a trapeze. It wasn’t a very big circus, just some small family-run traveling one, but it gave him a place to stay and an environment that welcomed him, and that was good enough for him.

He was with the circus for about four years, up until he was eighteen, so technically this isn’t his childhood anymore, but I’m gonna keep going because I want to.

The Starwritten Society was following a lead on an underground lab somewhere around the place where Fox’s circus was performing. Kennedy was actually on the mission, although she doesn’t do many of those anymore after she got injured in the field and such and I’ll talk about that later. Anyway.

The team of agents who were on the search came across the circus, and figured it was as good of a place as any to try and find the person they were looking for, Eleanor Sylvidas. She was actually in the crowd watching, and there was a confrontation after the show. Fox went to check it out, being the one generally in charge of telling people to cool it whenever small fights broke out between customers, but he wasn’t quite sure what to do in a situation where both parties happen to have guns pointed at each other. Especially when Eleanor pointed her gun at his head and told the agents that if they didn’t back down, she’d shoot him.

That wasn’t exactly something that happened to him on a day-to-day basis.

Of course, a fight broke out. Actually, Fox made the first move, he literally tried to snatch this woman’s gun out of her hand. It didn’t work, but the shot she took at him definitely missed, and then there was a very chaotic fight scene and Eleanor ended up losing and got arrested. Course, they still had to find the lab so they could get the kids out of there. Fox was very helpful in that aspect, too.

Once the mission had been completed, he was offered a place as a trainee in the Society. Those who were there will say that the offer was accepted immediately, but he was actually a bit reluctant. He made the choice to go, however, and it proved to be one of the best decisions he’s made.

——————————————

tw; abuse, violence, gun mention

Wilson. Where do I start? He has trauma, definitely, although so does practically everyone who works with the Starwritten Society.

See, Wilson is actually one of the people who were rescued from labs as children, but there are two things that sets him apart from others.

1. He wasn’t kidnapped at birth or after he developed abilities. He was literally created in a lab, which has led to a lot of self-doubt due to being raised to believe he wasn’t “natural”.

2. The Society aims to rescue all powered children from labs as soon as possible, and since many of them are kidnapped at a young age, they try to get them out at least before they turn 10. Wilson wasn’t found until he was a bit older than 17.

He wasn’t even given a name while he was in the lab. He was just “Project Firebird”, with abilities including fire and heat manipulation, as well as immunity to those two things, plus flight and enhanced strength, speed, and stamina. Wilson was made for the sole purpose of being a weapon.

The person running the lab? An absolute fucker of a man named Alastor Killigan. Him? I cannot put into words how much I hate him. He just really fucking sucks, and not in a “loveable bastard“ way. I honestly wish I could physically teleport into my daydreams just to set this bitch on fire.

Anyway, he’s running this whole operation. He’s got guards, he’s got other scientists who he may or may not have blackmailed into helping him, he’s got people who work for him. And this isn’t the first time he’s done this. That’s right, Grey isn’t the first time he’s tried to weaponize a kid. He got caught by the Society last time, but escaped, and now he knows that he has to keep moving around constantly.

So the first 17 years of Grey’s life were just constant training and experiments and tests and moving around and being raised to believe that he was a literal monster and wasn’t worth anything if he wasn’t a weapon. Fucked up, right? But, see, the Society had no idea he existed. They found the lab kids through keeping tabs on recent kidnappings and disappearances. Grey wasn’t on any of those lists. The only people aware of Grey’s existence were Alastor and the people working for him.

In fact, the Society only found him by chance. They managed to track Alastor’s location and find him to arrest him, and they found Grey while they were doing that. There was a huge fight, but Alastor lost, and Grey got rescued. Things were looking up.

Because the Society legally adopts all the orphaned kids they take in, Grey needed a name. He also just needed a name in general. The lady filling out the papers told him he could just pick something, and he panicked. He wasn’t used to being allowed to make his own decisions. There was a plaque on the wall with a list of people who’d been top agents in the past, and he just read one of those.

Grey Wilson.

So, y’know, that‘s why it says he was a top agent in 1937. Just a heads up.

Have I talked about the Society’s different departments yet? No? Maybe I’ll do that later, but anyway - one of the divisions is basically therapy, because some of these kiddos have severe trauma and need help. Grey worked with a woman named Mags for a few years, and then started training for the High-Risk Rescue department. He was taking charge of his own future! Yayyyy!

Oh yeah and then Alastor escaped - again, and Mags went missing on the same day and it was presumed Alastor killed her on his way out, and Grey hasn’t seen either of them since. He’s been working in the Society for about 22 years now, trying to make sure that nobody goes through what he has. He decided early on that he didn’t want to use his abilities again, ever, and it’s become his personal secret, with very few people knowing.

[patheticwithanem]

2020 in Retrospect

Hey friend,

I know it’s late, but I HAVE TO DO THIS. I kind of promised myself I’m writing about the year that was. I’m not exactly sure why; maybe it’s to put things in perspective going in to 2021? And today’s my fourth year anniversary with my employer, so I guess it’s perfect timing? (More on that later)

So I was going through my notes (I have this habit of writing down what happens on a daily basis - be it activities, emotions, drama, name it) and one thing’s for sure. 2020 SUCKED. It did. But I’m committing to this no matter what!

First things first: lots of profanities along the way. Well actually, I was about halfway writing the letter when fucking Tumblr decided to refresh and delete what I’ve been writing for about one fucking hour now. So I have to fucking do it all over again. If this is the Lord telling me to stop being sentimental about 2020, fret not my Lord! I’m one stubborn son of a bitch, so I’m carrying on.

Here’s how the rest of the year unfolded. 2020. Let’s go.

JANUARY. Reunions?

January 1. Had a get-together with a few relatives in Malabon. It was fun! I used to be so allergic to family reunions but I guess age creeping in changes you? You value people even more now? This was also the last time we’re able to spend some time with my uncle from Singapore. He brought his family to spend the holidays here. He’s a sweetheart and a great father who’s missed.

January 9. I attended a college dormmate’s wedding. I remember contemplating whether to go or not only to realize I’m actually lucky to be even invited given the fact that I chose to be distant for them for a long while. I also told myself that not showing up is so far from what I’m trying to be. Although I wasn’t there for the whole thing, I’m glad I did come. I was able to bond with my roommates once again whom I treated like brothers ten years ago and that was nice. A not-so-close dormmate even introduced me to his boyfriend and that’s huuuuge. The bride was beautiful too, and I’m glad she’s in the best place right now after all she’s been through. She’s a strong one, that girl.

January 11. Got invited to a birthday pool party of a colleague at work. I have to say I’m actually quite surprised I was invited to this. She’s always had my back though and always kind of looked after me, so I had to go. It was fun but I didn’t get drunk AT ALL. 

January 12. AND THIS IS WHERE SHIT STARTED HAPPENING. The Taal Volcano erupted. It was awful especially for everyone living near the area because everything was covered with ash. It was also a day before my brother’s birthday and we thought the ashfall would be worse the next day so we decided to celebrate earlier. 

January 19. Went to a fiesta. Did not expect to survive that at all. It was a different kind of neighborhood, but the people were nice. 

January 25. Went to a public market with co-workers to buy clothes, eat chicken wings for dinner and then our regular fix of karaoke. Good times. 

Anything else? I was able to book a birthday trip to Yogyakarta, which I eventually canceled because of youknowwhat. Tragic.

February. Blindside!

February 7. Blindside’s a bitch. Yes, that’s what I had written on my notes. I legitimately felt blindsided. So story: I have a friend who I found out was pregnant (let’s call her Ms. Preggy, sorry) and me and her bestfriend (let’s call him Work Son because he was my work son in a lot of ways) decided to hold an intervention for her. The four of us including a friend I’m going to call The-Now-Bestie (kind of a spoiler) whom I had a misunderstanding and was not in speaking terms with will be coming to Work Son’s place. Essentially, the goal was to make Ms. Preggy open up about her pregnancy and her issues with the douchebag father; make her feel that she has us and she doesn’t need to be alone in this. I think it went well, in that regard. However, the whole thing was awkward in epic proportions. It’s as if me and The-Now-Bestie didn’t want to acknowledge each other’s existence, and when we didn’t have a choice, we were sarcastic to each other. I also really felt like an outsider among the four that time; like I wasn’t supposed to be there and wasn’t really contributing to anything. It was a really lonely feeling. I decided to distance myself to them after that.

February 13. WINNERS AT WAR PREMIERE! Words can’t even express how excited I was to see some of my heroes again on screen! Parvati with that “phoenix rising from the ashes” confessional? Damn, girl! Still a fucking legend! It was also nostalgic Yul working his godfather magic once again. I’ve always seen him as a top-tier winner and someone I looked up to for what he represented to the Asian community and the history of Survivor. It was also nice seeing Kim, Tyson, Tony, Sophie, Natalie and Sandra. But I must say I kind of missed Todd. He was my favorite winner and was a great storyteller, a great strategist and a great character with an amazing comeback story. He would’ve been perfect for a season with this caliber of players. And as much as I hate Jeff Probst for shoving him down our throats, I wanted to see Cochran play with these winners! Caramoan’s my first season (a late superfan, yes) and he’s the very reason I got so hooked with the show. I used to think it’s a game where people like me never win. So to see someone like Cochran who’s awkward in every sense of the word (and owning it) win Survivor, it is very inspiring. I like speaking in metaphors and it’s funny how much metaphorical Survivor can be to how I see life now. I see Cochran and if he can win in Survivor, I feel like I can win in life, as silly as that sounds. Cochran sucked his first season, but he then went on to play this dominant game his second try while still managing to be the adorkable underdog that he is. I love that story. Man, I get so worked up when I talk about Survivor! I wish I had that same passion with anything else.

February 19. Mom slipped and had to be rushed to the nearest ER. Good thing there were no fractures and she was fine. I guess we can thank the fats for that? LOL

February 21 ‘til 23. WEEKEND STAYCATION! I needed this! Drinking at the hotel taproom with a live band? YES! Indian for lunch and surf-and-turf buffet for dinner? YES YES YES! That lamb chops, MY LORD. Thank you.

February 29. Leap Day. I started journaling again. 

March. FUCKING COVID.

March 16. The Start of the Lockdown we all come to love now (punk, sarcasm). 

March 17. Politics is so taboo to discuss especially over dinner. But then BAM. I had a major fight with my dad (and by major, I mean MAJOR in a get-out-of-the-house-in-the-middle-of-the-pandemic kind of major). It was basically about a comment he made that’s so misogynistic (towards the Vice President) that I just knew I can’t just let go. It was sooo bad I got all pissed, and when I’m pissed, I can get scary. Maybe it’s the voice or the eyes or both, but the fight got really heated on the verge of getting physical. Which now that I think about it is stupid just because of fucking different political views. Well, I can never get behind the President and they’re huge fans of him and I’ve come to terms with that but it’s just... bleh. I’m not even gonna try to rationalize it because I can’t. It’s just.. disgusting. Oh fucking well. 

April. Wander-fucking-lust.

April 1. I started a 30-day Financial Detox which basically meant no unnecessary expenses. No online shopping, no paying for leisure. None. It was April Fools, but I was dead-set on saving! (Spoiler alert: I failed.)

April 6. Meltdown. I just really couldn’t hold it in anymore.

April 11. Dad’s birthday. After not talking for over a month (which is no easy feat in a tiny condominium unit), we acknowledged each other’s presence. By April 15, it’s like nothing happened anymore. He even gave me a home haircut (which for a beginner, is pretty good). On other news, I started watching The Politician on Netflix and t’was the day I started obsessing on Ben Platt and his music. 

April 16. A year ago, I was enjoying sidewalk pho and almost making friends at Cu Chi Tunnels and the Saigon Skydeck of the Bitexco Financial Tower in Ho Chi Minh. Damn, covid.

April 18. That crazy border-crossing from Saigon to Phnom Penh a year ago. That was fulfilling. Damn, covid.

April 19. A year ago, I was experiencing sunrise at Angkor Wat. Wander-fucking-lust UGH. 

April 30. That Town Hall shoutout from our company’s President because of reaching my quota from last month. That really felt good. As much as I hate to admit it, I like being validated from time to time. It definitely meant a lot especially coming from her who took a chance on me. I was patting my back.

MAY. Endure. Let Go. 

May 14. KING TONY WON. Very well-deserved win. A disappointment of a season if you ask me, but props to the king for dominating an all-winners season. Respect for that. Also Natalie and Michele played great games as well and they should be very proud of themselves. I feel like a proud father to these winners HAHAHA!

May 16. Was pleasantly surprised with Dead to Me. That car scene between Jen and Judy on that ninth episode from the second season? Damn. That’s one of the few moments I teared up because of a TV show. That was powerful. All that tension building up and then that sudden release? I really felt that.

May 26. Why do I always feel all this fucking rage inside of me? I try to think of any triggers but I can’t seem to find one that’s actually reasonable. It’s like the isolation getting the best of me. I initially thought quarantine’s going to be a cakewalk for an introvert like myself, but it wasn’t the case. I feel like I’m losing my shit because I was stripped off of the usual things I have access to whenever I feel uneasy and anxious and angry like this. Endure, let go, I know. But it’s so much easier said than done, right?

JUNE. Breathe.

June 12. So the plan to sell the condo and find a new place is real. We went to this great place in Valenzuela and it was a great house and all but I felt weird. Maybe I was having trouble letting go? Maybe it’s just me being averse to change yet again?

June 15. Slept 6am for that How To Get Away With Murder series finale. That speech. VIOLA. Chills all over my body. 

June 18. New phone was delivered. That was fast.

June 27. First time visiting the village we moved to. We were checking a different house this time and was already picturing us living there. Still felt weird, but maybe less.

Looking at it now, I realize almost nothing happened in this stretch of months. Pathetic.

JULY. Change (that’s not necessarily good lol)

July 3. The Anti-Terrorism Bill signed. FUCK THE CIRCUS THAT IS THE PHILIPPINE GOVERNMENT. 

July 10. Doomsday. The ABS-CBN renewal disapproved. FUCK THE CIRCUS THAT IS THE PHILIPPINE GOVERNMENT. Also, that first house we checked was bought this day. First heartbreak.

July 22. Decided to donate to one of my elementary teachers to help finance school supplies for his students in the province. That felt good. 

July 24. folklore’s goooood. This is the Taylor Swift sound that I love. (I had to write that down because that was a 2020 highlight to be honest)

AUGUST. Getting older. Again.

August 2. Donated to another cause: to help a really close friend’s mom (who’s a school principal) on financing their students’ lesson modules (they needed more paper so the donation was going to be used to buy more paper). That felt good.

August 3. Started obsessing on Dear Evan Hansen. I mean come on. HOW COME I ONLY KNEW OF THIS NOW?!?! The story, the acting, the soundtrack... it felt like I asked the Lord for a musical for me and he gave this on a silver platter. 

August 9. Lasagna, baked sushi, lechon belly, pansit, cake. Weird combination, I know, but that’s me!

August 11. Discovered the Slowly app. Changed my life since then! I’m not even exaggerating. I guess it has to do with feeling extremely lonely amid the pandemic and getting this platform where you can talk to literally anyone while still keeping your anonymity. And it strips you off of instant gratification you’re so used to because you actually have to wait for your letters to be sent and to arrive. A great exercise for patience if you ask me! And since you have to wait, you make your letters longer and more worthwhile. It’s a platform free of judgment which relies heavily on building actual mental and emotional connections. It’s a gift, truly. NOT EXAGGERATING; YES I’M THAT LONELY.

August 23. The house search continued. This time, the South!

August 24. It was my first time watching a Korean drama and I gotta say I get the hype now. Korea makes great stories and they take their time when telling these stories. The story centering about mental health was definitely what got me to try watching It’s Okay to Not Be Okay, but the show’s so much more than that. That was a great watch.

SEPTEMBER. Finally some light?

September 1. Second year anniversary. I still really miss her.

September 5. My cat’s 5th birthday! Of course we had to celebrate for her with baked macaroni and burnt cheesecake. 

September 11. Lost uncle. He gave a good fight. 

September 19. SENSE8. It’s a show that doesn’t need any explaining. It’s the BEST. I love this cast SO MUCH. I remember thinking if I ever get a tattoo (which is unlikely), I’ll maybe have the title of that Sense8 series finale inked on me. AMOR VINCIT OMNIA. Love conquers all. 

September 27. After a series of unfortunate events, we were led to this house on the same village we keep going back to, and the moment we saw it, we were sold. This is going to be our house. And it happened.

OCTOBER. Surprises?

October 6. Hooked up with someone I probably shouldn’t.

October 12. Booked a trip for next year because I’M HOPEFUL AS FUCK.

October 21. Had the best conversation I had in a long time. 

October 22. Hooked up with someone I probably shouldn’t. 

October 28. Organized a digital event for work. I’m still on the fence whether I’m proud of it or not. It was my first event, and I’ve wanted to do that for a long time. While I enjoyed all the preparation that came with it, from making that tactical marketing plan to coordinating with the organizers and my team, I felt like it was bland. There were lapses here and there and I know that we all tried the best we could, but maybe I just pictured it a little better in my mind? It wasn’t a flawless event and maybe I wanted it to be flawless. But it was fun. I never would’ve imagined me hosting an event, but I did. 

NOVEMBER. Decisions.

November 14. So news came and we’re finally moving. The buyer of the condo got approved and it was only a matter of weeks to settle documents and payment and we’re good to go. I had mixed feelings about it. It took me back to that time we started looking for houses. I wasn’t exactly ready to let go of the place I grew with for the past five years. And I wasn’t also ready to let go of the convenience, and the relationships I only have started building with friends I found along the way. But at that moment I knew I had to be happy because they were happy. My family was happy. I knew I have to be happy.

November 21. Started all the packing. Packing meant decluttering and reminiscing, so letting go of more things which was overwhelming at first, but inevitable. 

November 23. I had something checked in the hospital, and something happened and it wasn’t supposed to go that way but it did and it was so fucking bizarre lol

November 28. HAPPY MOVING DAY. It’s that day of the year. Stress was off the charts because of the time constraint and frankly, the lack of preparedness. Good thing a few people helped us with the rest of the packing. It was an impossible task for me and my sister alone so we were glad we got all the help we needed. I did most of the heavy lifting, so I had bruises all over my body for weeks, but after all was said and done, it felt surreal. Felt like everything coming full circle. That first night in the new home? I’ll never forget that. That was special.

December. The end of an era.

December 2. I went back to the condo to stay for a few more days. Get to feel the place one last time. Also lost a huge deal at work to a competitor. I usually really get depressed with these losses, but for some reason I felt indifferent about it. I guess it was my mind telling me I’ve mentally checked out of work already? That maybe it is really time to move on to something that’ll make me care about what I do again? Make me feel again?

December 4. Met someone (who we can call the Professor) I’ve been talking to for a while now. We’ve had some really great conversations leading to this night; talks at 3AM that’s kind of liberating? I was upfront about the moving and that I only have a few days left in the place which is probably why it happened. Professor was also upfront about leaving the country in a few months for an opportunity to work and do research in Japan for five fucking years. It was awkward at first; but we eventually warmed up to each other and spent the night together. 

December 5. Things escalated pretty quickly. The Professor gave me a shower (that was weird but I was feeling it and I thought it was sweet and sexy?). We cuddled until we slept and there was breakfast prepared when I woke up. I don’t usually get to experience this kind of stuff so I really appreciated that. I was feeling it. I thought I can get used to this! I left the place and was invited back again so I stayed over for another night. We’ve had a few more interesting conversations. I was not expecting some of the things we discussed especially the talk about long-distance relationships. The Professor asked me what I think about it and I was honest; I’m not against it but it’s not something I’ll take a chance on if I wasn’t sure about it. Mantra’s always been connection first before commitment. I’m not the “take a leap of faith” kind-of guy; I needed to be sure. Or at the very least be really mentally and emotionally connected with the person. I thought that made perfect sense. I still do.

December 6. So it was finally goodbye. Me and my sister went to the nearest church to donate a few clothes and shoes and to attend a mass. Bid farewell to the Professor too and promised each other to keep in touch. I also had an awkward encounter with my sister’s “friend” who she sneaked in the condo for God knows what for. Pretty sure they did the nasty.

December 13. We went to our old house (the one I spent my younger years in) to get a few stuff for the new house. I only really wanted to get my old bicycle because I want to be biking regularly for the next year. I want to take that fitness journey seriously! So I got the bike and I got to spend some time with some childhood friends. Good stuff.

December 15. A teammate resigned at work. The funny thing is he did it after getting that 13th month bonus HAHAHA! I can’t blame him though after learning about the salary he gets when he’s performing three functions in the team. That’s insane. But it really made me wonder: am I still in this for the long haul? Or do I move on too?

December 17. So I had my work desk and wardrobe delivered. Felt so nice buying things for my room! 

December 19. We got a new dog! Another French Bulldog. He’s pretty sweet. Someone’s not happy! (MY MOM)

December 22. And then this happened. We were supposed to meet after my dentist appointment (which I only used as an excuse to meet and I thought that was obvious) but the Professor never showed up. I waited for FIVE FREAKIN HOURS. I had like clothes with me because we agreed I sleepover but FUCK. Good thing a friend kept me company, but that was horrible. I thought YOU NEVER DO THAT TO ANYONE. I deserve better.

December 24. We had our house blessed. It was all super spontaneous; we invited a few friends and relatives over and had an intimate gathering. Mom got emotional (AGAIN).

December 27. So Ms. Preggy (from February - oooh that rhymed) had her son baptized. Since she lives a little father from the city, we decided to have a little staycation with some friends there too. The-Now-Bestie and Work Son was there, and we had beer and homecooked food and a slew of great conversations to cap off the year. 

Also December 27. I knew I needed to get something off my chest. And I just had to say it. 

“You’re so unfair. You shouldn’t have done that. Gave me false hopes. Gave me a “3-day trial period” only to disappear without any warning. Made promises you never intended to keep. You could’ve just told me you’re not interested anymore and I would’ve been fine with that but instead, you ghosted me. For the past few weeks since that weekend, it never seemed like you wanted to get to know me better. Or even just keep the communication going. It’s been one-sided and I wonder: has it always been this way? Maybe I’m remembering things differently. I told you I like you and I meant that. I’m still wrapping around my head why and how it happened to be honest. Maybe it’s that weekend? Maybe it’s the conversations leading up to when we first met? I don’t know. But things changed after that and I should ask you for an explanation but it’s really not the point. The point is I thought we can work something out and you hurt me. You may feel like you’re running out of time because of Japan but it’s no excuse to do that to anyone, really. You seem so sure about what you want so I hope you get whatever that is. Merry Christmas. Thanks for the memories.”

That was intense.

December 28. The Professor responded. “I apologize... I am getting attached... I had to “ponder on its implications to me in the long run”... I decided to slow down... It hurts... “That weekend that we met felt like I knew you before”... I am afraid... “You have no idea how hard it is to leave everything behind every 4-5 fucking years not because I wanted it but because I have to”... I still hope to continue whatever we have... “I will always remember you. Please don’t forget about me.”... YADA YADA YADA. 

I know. You know me. I try to empathize as much as possible. But I mean, come on. These are things I already know. It’s not what I needed to hear.

December 31. I needed to say something one last time. There’s already a lot of uncertainties in the world with COVID and life and everything else. I knew I needed answers; I want the binary. I want the black or white for this one. I’m not taking the gray with me next year. So I asked the following questions:

“What do you want from me? Do you want to be friends? Or we stick with occasional catching up on Viber every once in a while (because that’s what it sounds like to me)?”

“What do you want to get from your last two months here? What are you looking for? Just make the most “fun’? Or look for something that will stick?”

“Have you told me anything you really didn’t mean?”

“That one time we talked about long-distance, were you asking me?”

Fast forward to now: I never got the answer I needed. I guess this is one of those rare occasions where no answer is the answer. And after a few weeks of contemplating about it, I am leaving it behind in 2020. 

I’m actually at peace with that.

So there you have it. The suck-fest that is 2020. The first month of the new year wasn’t so bad. I feel this great energy. This year’s going to be different. I did tell you that this letter’s perfect timing. That’s because I’ve resigned and I’m moving on. A friend told me a while ago that he’s proud of me for finally taking action. The 2018 version of myself wouldn’t have done what I did and he was happy for me. I wanted a clean slate and I took it. That I was finally taking ownership of my life. 

I was elated. My friend usually spoils me with compliments and encouragement and my ever reliable negative self-image tend to disagree with him but for the first time in a very long time, it felt right. I’m not usually excited for New Years, but I guess I am?

I say bring it on, 2021.

Until then,

Patheticwithanem

[strawberrysoup]

Let’s Review || Chapter 16

Peter Parker knew that his big sister would do anything for him to be safe and happy. She’d given up everything for him twice over already and would do it again in a heartbeat. And that’s why, when the criminal mastermind Tony Stark started inextricably following him around, he didn’t say a word. Because he knew without a doubt Penny would do whatever she had to if it meant keeping Peter safe. He had to protect her, just like she always protected him. He never considered what would happen if Stark decided both Parker siblings were worth taking. Never considered who else in Stark’s inner circle would agree. He just wanted to protect her and yet somehow, they both ended up with needles in their necks.

relationship: Steve Rogers/Original Female Character/Bucky Barnes, background Peter Parker/Tony Stark rating: Explicit warnings: Dark Steve Rogers, Dark Bucky Barnes, Dark Tony Stark, Dark Avengers, kidnapping, non-con/dub-con elements, underage Peter Parker, emotional and psychological abuse, very dark casual reminder: this story is r o u g h. themes of rape, kidnapping, power imbalances, etc.. This story does not depict healthy or safe relationships. Trigger warning for violence.

Peter Parker was persistent. He had the kind of focus not seen in many teenagers, a dead set determination and a clever tongue to boot. Tony knew his boy hadn't learned his fast-talking ways from Penny, who would rather plow through problems with a baseball bat and her boots than sweet talk her way through anything, and he honestly wished he could've met their aunt May. She must've been one cunning lady to have raised such shit kickers. Especially since Peter, for all of his brutal intelligence, knew when to feign his sister's bambi eyes and play young and dumb. 

Unfortunately, Tony had a tendency to overlook the fact that Peter was a genius. It wasn't an exaggeration, it wasn't stretching the truth, Peter had a deadly combination of intelligence and cunning that was far beyond most people’s scope of understanding. Maybe if things had gone different, Penny could’ve explained that Peter was a fucking Slytherin. The kid had a level of ambition and determination that meant his intelligence went from ‘damn he’s smart’ to ‘oh no he’s smart’.

It was a thin line that Penny had learned to walk quite well, but that Tony wasn't quite aware of. If he knew how fast the teenager's mind worked, he would've waited to let Peter see Penny. Instead, he agreed that they would have dinner on the soldier's floor. The second they stepped off the elevator and through the door to the apartment, Peter had already begun calculating. Steve clocked it within minutes, the way the teenager’s eyes scanned. 

Peter knew without a doubt that he was the safest person in the tower at any given time, both literally and figuratively. JARVIS had eyes on him every second of the day, regardless of privacy protocols and dark rooms. If Peter was in the tower, JARVIS was watching and entirely prepared to obliterate any danger in over ten miles, if Tony's spiel could be believed. If anyone decided to try to hurt Peter, they would literally be dead in seconds. 

He also currently possessed at least 90% of Tony Stark's devotion. The man was admittedly a creep, but he was a very powerful and very dangerous creep. Peter had seen the kind of men who skittered away under the weight of Tony's glare, who were more afraid of Tony Stark than of their mobster bosses. People were scared of the power Tony had and that included every person in the tower— the soldiers were not exempt.

The soldiers were not exempt and Peter was savagely aware of his status in comparison to theirs.

And Penny wasn't right. Penny was good at hiding her distress she always had been. Even when all of her loved ones were dying around her she'd kept her head on straight. Peter couldn't remember seeing her falter even once when she knew he was watching. But she was not okay and he noticed immediately and he did not like it. 

She'd greeted him when he and Tony came in. She'd hugged him tight and kissed his cheek and whispered she loved him. Tony had quickly inserted himself, wrapping around the pair and cooing at them both like they were puppies. Steve felt his jaw tick; Peter was subconsciously checking her for injuries, tucking Penny as close to his chest as he could and engulfing her small frame while his eyes scanned their surroundings.

It was strange to see a place so heavily influenced by Penny's tastes. They'd never had money before, never had the opportunity for Penny to so any sort of decorating, but the soldier's living room was decorated exactly to her dreams. There were plants everywhere, a giant hammock hung from the ceiling in front of the windows right next to an oversized beanbag chair. There was a delicate looking shelf with a vast array of yarn. It looked green and warm and there was a fireplace under the tv that he knew she'd love once winter hit. 

Because they were still gonna be there in the winter. Peter understood that, to some degree. That it had been early May when they were first taken, he'd been about to graduate. Penny would turn 25 in August and he would turn 18 in September. And they'd be in the tower. They'd be in the tower for their birthdays and for Halloween and Thanksgiving and Hanukkah. Unless something happened. 

The longer he watched Penny interact with the soldiers, the more Peter decided that something needed to happen. 

He hadn’t seen a happy or pleased look on Penny’s face since the day they’d been kidnapped. There was no telling if Tony or the others could tell, but he got the feeling they couldn't. To be fair, she had a bit of a resting bitch face and it was difficult for some people to distinguish between ‘that’s just how my face looks’ and ‘if one more bitch throws a stone in this glass house I’m gonna fuckin’ lose it’. Even Peter could admit the differences were subtle; it came down to a slight dimple in her cheek caused when she grit her teeth especially hard on the left side, the way her nose twitched when someone said something especially fucking dumb. Usually when she spent so long looking so pissed off, she’d come home from the night shift with a bag of weed the moment she could afford it. 

But the way she looked now wasn’t… anything Peter had ever seen before. Happiness was easy to identify if you knew her and he’d seen what she looked like two minutes before she started screaming in anger. He could remember the several times the pair of them had been in some sort of custody related court hearing and he knew what fear looked like on Penny’s face too. It wasn’t fear, though, the expression on Penny’s face; it wasn’t the fear he’d witnessed on her face when she’d been so, so afraid that she wouldn’t be put under aunt May and uncle Ben’s custody. It wasn’t even the same expression she’d made the day they were deciding on whether or not he’d be able to stay under her custody after aunt May died, but fear was the closest thing he could compare it too. 

It was crushing to witness. Penny’s natural tan had gone pasty white, the blood drained from her features. Her hair was a frizzed up mess, meaning she’d been pulling at it constantly for hours. Her eyes were bloodshot and constantly scanning and she was staying within arm’s reach of the soldiers at all times. He almost wondered if it was some stupid rule they’d given her like the ones Tony gave him sometimes; arbitrary orders just to see if he’d follow the rules properly. 

But the soldiers were acting incredibly casual and simply accepting the closeness like it was a gift. Every time she brushed near them, Peter could see the way their faces would light up. Both Steve and Bucky were unnecessarily attractive, problematically pretty and when they were happy— well, they were really attractive when they were happy. Steve looked like a golden retriever, exhilarated and bright. Bucky was a harder read but even his eyes were softer, his stance more relaxed. 

“Food will be up soon, how about we pick the movie?” Steve was facing the TV as he spoke, remote in one hand while the other smoothed over Penny’s back, “anybody have any suggestions?” 

“Not Star Wars,” Tony spoke up, tone light as he put his arms around Peter from behind, kissing the side of the teenager’s head, “we’ve been marathoning them for days and there’s still more.” 

“Star Wars is great,” he automatically argued, forcing his body not to relax into the hold. 

“What about a fantasy film instead of sci-fi then? JARVIS, could you show us options?” 

The men all bickered casually over their options, but Peter turned his head to Penny and spoke in Hebrew, “what’s wrong Penina?”

The words seemed to startle her out of a trance and she turned to look at him, confusion in her eyes; he very rarely used her Hebrew name. It was common for Jewish kids to have a Hebrew name tucked away, the one that families generally used versus the English name they used by day. Penina Shoshana was her full name, her grandfather had been Penuel and was the reason Penny and Peter both had P names. Shoshana was named for her father, Ephraim. 

“Nothing my love,” she answered quietly, eyelashes fluttering slightly and he could see the shine of tears in her eyes, “nothing is wrong.” 

Peter squirmed out of Tony’s arms and walked to the couch, grabbing her arm and pulling her down onto the same cushion as him. He wrapped himself around her like an octopus, sending Steve a dark look when the blond looked back curiously, and tugged her closer. 

“Don’t lie, please tell me what’s wrong?” 

“Palti Chayim,” Penny rarely used his Hebrew name, only when she was chastising him, but it was all she could choke out, her eyes so full of fear, “don’t look at him like that, don’t make them angry.”

“But—” 

“Hey, we’re feeling a little left out here,” Tony plopped onto the couch directly next to him and wrapped his arm around Peter’s shoulders, “I’m surprised you both know Hebrew so well, you must’ve learned it as kids?” 

Peter tried not to grit his teeth; he was trying to have a serious conversation with his sister but if he didn’t answer Tony promptly and with the correct attitude he’d get called bratty and get threatened with a punishment. Penny was in a fragile state— Peter literally didn’t know how she’d react to him being threatened right in front of her. He’d never seen her like this before, he was missing key variables. 

“Penny knows it better than me,” he answered, “I learned when I was little but Penny spoke it enough that it kept me from forgetting it all once we moved in with aunt May. Penina, please tell me what’s going on? What did they do to you?” 

“Penina, is that what Penny is short for?” Bucky questioned, coming to sit far too close to them on the opposite side of the couch from Tony, “I thought it was Penelope?” 

“Jewish kids have Hebrew names most of the time,” Peter forced himself to bite out, “They chose Penina first with Penny for a nickname, Penelope was just an easy derivative for an English name.” 

“Peter you must let it go,” Penny’s voice almost startled him, especially coming from so close to his ear. 

“I’m not letting it go! What did they do to you?” 

Steve was watching him. The blond man was careful and incredibly discreet but Peter felt the tingle run up his spine. There was a dangerous energy behind the muscle bound giant, he retained the golden retriever essence but there was red behind it. Penny immediately clocked it as well.

“Do not speak in such a tone, Palti,” Penny’s tone was more controlled than Peter’s was but the panic was still there and she followed it up with a string of words he vaguely recognized from the Torah, mumbled so fast under her breath he couldn’t make out the individual words. 

“Penny,” her head turned, nervous brown eyes landing on Steve.

It was probably a good thing that Peter couldn’t tell what was going on in her head. The fear she’d experienced for 7 and a half fucking hours of being alone with Steve. A man that she witnessed torture another human being without hesitation just 24 hours ago. He would’ve lost it and his captors would realize he was far more like Penny than they could’ve imagined. 

“You need to speak a language we can understand, your tone is making us nervous,” the man’s words were calm and his tone was even. 

There wasn’t a hint of agitation that Peter could hear but Penny’s spine stiffened and she nodded immediately, lips pressed tightly shut. 

“Now, what movie should we watch?” 

“They hurt you, didn’t they? Tell me, I’ll tell Tony, he’ll take you from them!” 

“Palti Chayim, stop it!” An accent laced Penny’s voice, audible beneath her panic, “Now! You have to stop!” 

“Peter,” Tony’s hand casually found the back of his neck, fingers massaging into the tissue gently but pointedly, “between the three of us, we know at least 10 different languages. You can pick any of those, but you need to pick one we understand.” 

The order raced across his skin like a spiderweb, chills chasing down his spine at the nearly tangible sensation. Disobeying direct orders from Tony was one of Peter’s least favourite things to do, both because it resulted in a punishment 9 times out of 10 and because it meant Tony would be upset with him. He hated making Tony upset, despite everything. 

Once again his brain repeated what he’d been thinking for days and days, ‘if you just hadn’t of hurt Penny, if you’d left her out of this, why did you have to do this, it didn’t have to be this way’. How was he supposed to deal with such an offense, the blatant disregard for his sister’s life. Penny was the single most important person in Peter’s life but he was just supposed to deal with how she’d been treated? Like an abused fucking dog. Passed off to whatever schlep would take her, beaten into obedience and expected to be kind and loving and loyal and beaten again every time she wasn’t. 

“They hurt her,” he snapped, eyes locked on where Bucky was sitting so close to her, “they had to have, there’s no other reason Penny would be acting like this!” 

“Peter—” Bucky cut Penny off before she could finish, standing up with her in his arms and taking just a couple of steps away from the couch.

“Hush, babydoll,” the way the man arranged her in his arms bothered him, the way he rolled her head against his shoulder and tilted his head down to shadow her face. Who the fuck did he think he was, touching his sister like that?

“Peter, I want you to listen to me,” Tony took his chin in hand and turned his face, “Penny has not been hurt, she was punished for acting out last night. She wasn’t hurt at all.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Peter snapped to his feet, heart racing under his ribs, “Y-You think whatever they did to her… was okay? S-She’s traumatized! I’ve never seen her so terrified in my entire fucking life, what the fuck Tony!?” 

“Baby boy if you don’t calm down immediately there will be consequences. You’re getting your sister worked up over a punishment that should’ve been put to bed the moment it was over. You’ve earned yourself a couple of punishments yourself, haven’t you?” There was a cold calmness in the man’s voice, at war with the fire in his eyes. 

Part of him wanted to believe that Tony couldn’t possibly mean what he was saying. Penny was broken, something was wrong. How could he say that, as if she deserved to be traumatized for whatever stupid behavior she’d displayed.

It would’ve been okay, maybe, for her to have gotten a spanking like he had before. It wasn’t a lasting punishment, it wouldn’t follow her in her nightmares. It certainly wouldn’t bother her while she was awake—he’d bet Penny would chew literal glass before allowing herself to act like she was in pain from something like a spanking. Whatever this was, it had changed her entire demeanor into something he wasn’t entirely sure he recognized. It wasn’t just some punishment for misbehaving, they’d hurt her and he didn’t care. He didn’t fucking care. 

Peter turned to look where Penny had managed to wriggle her way onto her feet despite Bucky’s arms remaining loosely around her, swallowing heavily, “I’m going to get us out of here, Penina. I promise Penny, whatever I have to do to get us away, I’m gonna do it.” 

He didn’t notice Tony’s phone go off hardly a second later, but he did feel the way Tony’s hand closed over the back of his neck. The pressure steadily increased until he found himself squeezing his eyes shut, apprehension tangling its way down his nervous system. 

“I know that you were told to speak a different language—twice, baby. You deliberately disobeyed. You’re not going anywhere, sweet boy, there’s no getting away,” Tony’s voice vibrated through his entire body, his knees trembled, “and you should know better than to be acting out like this.” 

Already weak kneed, Peter was quick to collapse under the weight of Tony’s hand. The landing was jarring and painful but Tony immediately stepped up closer and pulled him to lean his weight against his legs, cheek pressed firmly to the hollow in the older man’s hip by a tight grip on his hair. Peter managed to tilt his head back just enough to see the way Tony looked down at him, the stern expression on his face. 

It only lasted a second or two. At least, that’s what it felt like in Peter’s eyes. One moment, Tony was staring down at him, flexing the hand clenching his hair and the next he was just gone. All 125lbs of Penny had bulldozed him, shoulder finding prime real estate exactly where his sternum ended and the fragile connection of his false ribs became the most tenuous. There was a horribly awkward inhale followed by a pained wheeze. Tony stumbled and hit the ground and then everyone moved at the same time. 

Penny darted forward to grab the injured man, hands already tucked into fists as she landed on her knees at his side. Before she could enact anymore acts of brutality Bucky and Steve had burst forward. Steve hauled Penny up and over his shoulder in less than a second, completely immune to her screaming obscenities. Bucky followed Tony to the floor and carefully felt out the prone man’s ribs, flesh fingers gliding over bruising skin as delicately as possible. He couldn’t find any fractures, nothing was obvious other than the abrasions, but they’d still have to call Bruce down. Hopefully he wouldn’t be too disturbed by the late hour. Or the multiple house calls in one day (to the same floor even, they were fucked). 

“Penny, babydoll—twice in two days?” Steve sighed heavily as he manipulated her carefully in his arms, her own pinned to her sides. 

“I’ll fucking kill him, I don’t care!” She screamed, tears of fear and rage slipping from her eyes, “Don’t you ever touch him! I’ll fucking die first, Stark! I’ll kill you myself!” 

Penny’s knee slipped from Steve’s grip and she immediately drove it up straight into his face. She hit the ground full force, back taking the entire impact and knocking the breath out of her. Steve stumbled back a step or two before going through the coffee table, smashing it to bits while blood spewed everywhere. 

Recovering from her rough landing took more time than she’d anticipated, but Penny managed to weakly grasp the leg of the coffee table, broken off in Steve’s spill, on her way back to her feet. 

Peter’s eyes went almost impossibly wide at the sight; Penny had played softball since she could walk. She’d been such a good batter that had she finished high school, she likely would’ve gotten a full ride scholarship for the position. She hit harder than any other player in the state, harder than the majority of the baseball teams’ players in the area. Her wrist rolled and the wood spun around her hand before coming to rest in her palm again. 

Bucky didn’t even really see it coming, but Peter watched it happen in slow motion. The man’s head turned one frame at a time while Penny adjusted her grip and wound up. He just barely managed to raise his metal arm in time to deflect the tail end of the hit. 

Steve and Tony couldn’t remember the last time they’d seen Bucky hit the ground like a sack of bricks. A completely uncontrolled fall, head bouncing off the luckily carpeted floor. Tony would’ve been next, had Steve not gathered his bearings with an unsettling swiftness. He rose to his feet, blood pouring from his nose, and grabbed Penny from behind. It was fortunate that by now she’d run through her repertoire of bear hug hold escapes because she didn’t try anything that managed to surprise him, maintaining a carefully balanced amount of pressure and support. 

 “Shhhh, babydoll, you’re gonna go to sleep now,” Steve’s hand closed over her throat, thumb covering her pulse with a careful pressure, “just go to sleep baby, we’ll take care of this.” 

“D-Don’t hurt her,” Peter felt a panic attack coming on with rapid speed, twisting in his chest and knotting around his heart, “please, please—”

“It’s okay, Peter, you don’t have to worry, Penny’s safe,” the blond’s words were gentle despite the situation, despite the fact that Penny went limp in his arms within seconds and his eyes locked on the boy’s face, “all we want is for you both to be safe and happy and we’re going to figure out how to make that work. It’s our fault that everything’s been so difficult on you both, but we’ll fix it. Just give us a chance sweetheart, I promise we’re going to fix it.” 

There was a shocking amount of meaning portrayed in so few sentences. They were going to figure it out, make it work. They were going to fix it and Peter had no idea what that entailed and no idea what impact it would have on his sister but he understood now. He understood why Penny looked so exhaustingly terrified; Steve Rogers was covered in blood, still actively bleeding while his nose swelled and his eyes bruised. His lover was knocked out cold on the floor, next to one of his best friends who still gasped for every other breath. 

The golden retriever of a man transformed into something unseemly. There was a darkness in his eyes, a sharpness to his face, and a cunning cut to his stare. He was terrifying in a way that Tony couldn’t emulate, one that caused a primal sense of fear to build in the back of one's skull.

But Peter Parker was a fucking genius and if these bastards thought for a moment they could outsmart him they were wrong. Because if you gathered all that determination and all that ruthlessness together, it collected into a powder keg. So maybe he was the powder keg, not Penny. Penny was just the match and Peter was the one about to explode.

*edited 10/6/2020 — adjusted dates