#how much more saturated mine went

[ppinksun]

Cringetober day 1: Screenshot Redraw

october snuck up on me and i spent the morning contemplating prompt lists before deciding to commit to cringetober... and then immediately didnt really follow the first prompt. this is Not a screenshot redraw but i figured in concept it was close enough..... :)

i love the colours in this card (and the vignette as a whole) so it seemed real fun to draw ! ive also always thought his face looks a little funny in it lol

[i-drop-level-one-loot]

🎃 Be Mine

Mind Control CW: Abduction, yandere esque monster, inhuman oc, mind break, tendrils, dub-con

The young master stood in his garden, smiling softly as he stared at his roses, enjoying the romanticism of the dew speckled petals glistening under the moonlight. His newest servant, (Reader), watched him with a blanket in hand, ready to wrap it around his shoulders at the first sign of a chill. They worried for Mikhail greatly, for although the young man was strong enough to care for his estate after the death of his parents he was of weak constitution.

Smiling, (Reader) prayed that they weren't blushing as they approached Mikhail from behind. "Master, shall we go back inside? The temperature has dropped quite a bit."

His starlight colored eyes crinkled as he returned (Reader's) smile. "You care for me too much, dear (Reader). Thank you."

It was a dream, being able to work for someone as stunningly beautiful as Mikhail. Even if the work was difficult, (Reader) being the only servant in the mansion, it was rewarding. His face was a blessing and his voice was like the serenading of an angel.

They passed by a window, and (Reader) couldn't help but look at their reflection, even if it was warped in the darkness. There were no mirrors in the mansion, so (Reader) often feared that they weren't presentable when meeting Mikhail. Their reflection looked back at (Reader), and all (Reader) felt was fear.

It was as though they suddenly woke up.

(Reader) had been hiking through the mountains with their friends from college, when (Reader) began hearing someone calling their name in the dark.

As the nights went on, (Reader's) friends began to vanish, wandering off into the woods.

In the trees (Reader) found the decrepit building. It looked uninhabited, but they entered anyways, desperate for a phone. They heard crying, and it sounded like their friend Landon.

But all they found was..

Mikhail grabbed (Reader's) hand, yanking them away from the window and forcing their eyes on him. Those pale eyes that looked like they belonged to the dead. (Reader) struggled against his grasp, remembering what they had found. Their first meeting.

In the first room (Reader) entered they discovered a strange human lying naked on a bed, genderless like a doll and with long silver hair. But the face was split open down the middle, with tendrils reaching out from the skull's opening towards (Reader). They found themselves paralyzed by the glowing white eyes on the mask like face as the body rose from the elegant bed.

It was like slipping into a dream, a man's voice whispering into their mind "Be mine.." over and over again as colors saturated and the floor melted away. Vaguely aware of hands caressing their naked body, slender fingers longingly sliding in between their thighs, (Reader) allowed themselves to fall into his embrace. Because it was a "dream", it was okay to submit to his touch.

In that "dream", even the alien maw that prodded inside (Reader's) mouth only brought warmth. The tentacle like appendages entered (Reader) like a kiss, pulsating with a bioluminescent ooze. It was more than the arousal (Reader) felt, more than the building of their climax as the stranger's hands played with their sex; it was love. An intense, unquestionable love, begging (Reader) to feel the same. And as he placed one of his legs between their's so he could feel their orgasm on his thigh, (Reader) was willing to forget themselves to stay by his side.

(Reader) couldn't pull their hand away from their abductor, horrified that they had been so easily manipulated. How long had they been here, trapped in this dream?!

"(Reader)?" Mikhail's voice was calm, soothing, not sounding like someone holding an actively struggling adult.

It was only for a second, an accident, in the struggle (Reader's) eyes caught sight of his, and their body fell limp. They stopped struggling, slipping back into that dream.

Mikhail was beautiful, and although he was (Reader's) employer, they couldn't help but feel affection for him. An overwhelming love that they prayed he would never notice. The pink tint returned to their tear stained cheeks, realizing that he was holding their hand. "I'm sorry, sir. Was I spacing off again?"

His reflection showed his true face, split open down the center, exposing his cursed, writhing insides, but even in the window his eyes held relief. However, (Reader) wouldn't see that. He wouldn't let them. Their eyes were glassy and doll like as he pressed a kiss against their temple. They didn't feel it, they weren't aware of anything he did to their body unless he allowed them to be.

"Who do you belong to?" He already knew the answer, but needed the reassurance that his powers were working again.

"I belong to you, Master Mikhail."

[heyitstam]

dr. robert chase x reader - the chase itself (smut)

hi guys :D i know i haven't posted in a while, but i recently asked a VERY good friend of mine to cook me a fanfic of this very beautiful man, and HE DELIVERED. like all out jaws on the floor type delivered. i love this man fr, so i'm posting it here with his permission. it's his first fanfic ever, and in my humble professional opinion he overdelivered - so have fun reading this beautiful smut fic of reader and dr. chase <3

I. Humble Beginnings

Taking place in Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital, New Jersey, you are a fairly new nurse who pursued a medical career in quite a common way. The way being that it was more so your parents’ wish for you to go to medical school than your own, but you don’t necessarily hate that fact; at least it gave you a direction, so to speak.

It’s early in the morning, so there’s not a whole lot going on. You went around doing your usual checkups already and what not, therefore you decide to go on your well deserved coffee break. However, right as you are are on that, and you step out of the cubicle you are in, you glance over to an unfamiliar face through an operating room.

Some would call it love at first sight, but it really is more than that. It’s the kind of tingly sensation no one could forget. It’s almost shameful, but you can’t be bothered by that feeling right now. As if you physically couldn’t take your eyes off of them, you lose all sense of purpose, standing there, unable to think. Suddenly, someone bumps into you, which wakes you up from your total amusement. You feel the need to know more, so as you squint your eyes, you can read their name off of the shirt they are wearing.

“Dr. Robert Chase..?  I need to.. have a talk with him. I just need to.” – you think to yourself, ponderingly.

You go back to working with a saturated mind, unable to concentrate.

II. The Chase Itself

As days go by, you’re quite hesitant to reach out to him, but you seriously feel the need to. Why is that, really, you ask yourself. You ache to even have a talk with him at this point, but you long for more. Way more. You can’t think of anything else.

After contemplating for a good while, you decide to ask around to know what time he gets off from work, since you want to surprise him at the last minute. That’s the only way you see that you could have a one-on-one with him anytime soon.

With that out the way, you now know everything you needed to know. The only thing that divides you from your desire is to actually act up on it, so you gather all your courage. You look at the time, and you’re actually pretty shocked how caught up you were thinking about him. If you don’t hurry then you’re going to miss him that day entirely, so you start sprinting.

You notice him as he is turning around the corner, all dressed up, ready to leave, and you stumble right into him.

“I need to tell you something inside, it’s.. it’s important, alright. And it might just take a while” – you tell him, struggling with your words. “Great. I was just about to leave, you know. Whatever, show me, I don’t have much time for this. Is it really that important?” – he answers abruptly, being quite impatient.

You suddenly catch a rush of excitement. This is all that you were planning for the past few days or so, to get close to him, and it looks like you’re on track.

III. An Uneasy Start

Chase swings open the door of the office he’s just been in, ushering you in and closing the door behind him, since there’s quite the commotion even late into the night, it’s a hospital after all. It’s dark inside, the only light sources being a dim lamp he accidentally left on and the Moon seeping through the closed blinds faintly. The room has a surgical bed, a cabinet behind it with all kinds of training supplies, a desk with an office chair and a hanger stand. He puts his white coat on the stand, then undoes his tie, putting it into his pants pocket in a really apathetic way, with most of it hanging out.

Seemingly being quite contempt with the situation, he sits down onto the office chair, facing you, and he seriously doesn’t look like he wants to be there.

As a last effort at trying to ease up the situation, you grab the glass of water that is sitting on the desk and you splash it at him, in a playful way.  Not surprisingly, this backfires, since he doesn’t seem too happy about, not in the slightest. He stands up from his desk and goes on to wipe off his shirt to make it slightly less messy, all without even muttering a word. You do feel pretty stupid for that.

With another attempt at getting his attention, you arousingly start to cut the strings off of a few upper buttons on your blouse with a surgical knife, as he turns back to you, giving him a snarky look.

“Was that really necessary? What was so important about any of this? Can we get to the damn point?” – he asks you with a loss of temper. “I might have lied about that important thing.” – you answer him not so bravely.

He's visibly frustrated at you, and with a change of demeanor, he stands up and is now closing distance between you in a rush, as you are backing up. He halts as he catches up to you, towering over you.

With both hands on your shoulders, clenching them hard, he asks you, in an almost belittling tone: “Is this what you wanted? “ “I don’t know, is it?” – you answer him in a pretty similar way.

Like the kind of tease you tend to be, you start gliding around your fingertip on his chest, which he.. seems to enjoy, and lets you do for a short while, for then to push you to the nearest wall.

IV. Lust

Fueled by lust, you immediately grab his chin and assertively start kissing him, which absolutely catches him off-guard. In reaction to the advancement on him, he forces your body onto his as he caresses your back. After this goes on for a bit, he grabs you by the thighs, lifts you up and tosses you onto the surgical table.

With your arms behind you, you’re sitting halfway up as your legs are pulled up. You lock eyes while he is still holding you by your thighs. He leans over, drags you closer and is now standing between your legs.

You clumsily unbutton Robert’s shirt, one by one. In contrast, he carelessly tears off a few more of your buttons, making the blouse slide off your shoulders, which then falls onto your lap, flustering you in the process.

He then puts a hand on your lower abdomen, which feels surprisingly soft, even though his hands are quite firm. Most notably, it’s warm. So warm in fact, you feel like you could melt into him, and you are all about that feeling. Starting from your thighs, continuing to your hips, he brushes his both his hands across all the way up to your chest in a painstakingly soft and throughout way, but at the same it’s quite the calm moment.

An intrigued nervousness starts to pile in you as he suddenly starts to unbuckle his belt, which was undoubtedly the loudest noise in the room so far. In the meantime, like the obedient girl you feel like you are, with each rattle, you can't wait to obey. As if you were a household maid, you’re more than ready to satisfy the head of the house, as if he shook a bell around.

He tosses aside his pants and boxers and you feel like you can’t catch up with your heavy heartbeats as he rests his rigid cock on your stomach. It all just feels so sudden, and it’s starting to grow on you in a pleasurable way. He goes onto removing your bra, while you’re simultaneously stroking him slowly and briefly, before he goes down on you again.

You can feel it throb against you, and it’s just as, if not hotter than his hand is, which he has below your stomach again. He needily grinds against you over and over, lifting your skirt up with it every time, and rubbing against your inner thighs.

He doesn’t wait around before removing your panties, which are drenched by this point, and neither does he wait to penetrate you, as he is inside you now.

“Maybe I did need this.. “ - you hear him talk out loud quietly.

At once, as he is slowly, but forcefully thrusting into you, you see him pulling out the tie out his pocket, which he puts around your neck now, instead of his own.

It’s tightened real well, and he’s gripping it by the base, close to your neck. In the meantime he’s constantly pulling on it upwards, as it’s digging into the back of your neck, scraping your chin against it’s band, making your head tilt backwards considerably. With every moan you make, he tightens more on it, leaving your neck all bruised up. As he is fucking you, you’re nails deep in the sheets. You can’t help yourself but feel pleasured.

As he’s starting to get rougher on you, you begin to develop second thoughts and try to resist him, but as you’re doing that, he immediately tugs you closer, rendering your attempt futile. As you look at him, he seems to be way too into this, as his eyes lose all focus and glare, and you can only watch as his control over himself fades, railing you without a care in the world. This creates even more neediness in you, as you cross your legs behind his back, clinging onto him.

You can barely even keep your eyes on him, and you’re not even resisting his pull on your neck anymore, so you fully commit into tilting you head back in joy. All this sexual fulfillment demands you to do so, as you are slipping out of control more by the second. You feel like you could finish at any time, and as he’s also getting close, he’s painfully grazing your stiff walls more and more, with your moans sounding pitifully more helpless.

Ejaculating with a quiet grunt, he blasts the majority into you, leaving two strings across all the way up your body, all for you to feel ecstatic about. You really do feel like you owned up to it with your services, as if it was his way of rewarding you. Not to forget about you, he pushes you over the edge too, as you’re desperately gripping his shoulders. No matter you could barely take a break after your climax, he leans closer over your stimulation filled shivering body, and goes for a deep passionate kiss. Not even bothered by the fact you are still desperately panting and gasping for air along with him.

V. Not So Aftercare

After standing up from the bed, he comfortably hugs you by your hips, to which you endearingly put your hands onto his. After romantically rocking you slightly around with his hug, he leaves his hands off of you to start dressing up. It’s getting quite late.

As he is about to button back his shirt, he looks at you still standing there, still looking a bit shocked from everything that happened so far. Deciding to help out, he steps besides you, getting your bra back from your bed, and putting it on you. He’s slowly buckling the back together, and you are simply just unable to look him in the eyes, since you're becoming increasingly shy in a sudden way, blushing like you never have before.

"You.. didn't have to, you know.." - you tell him in a higher pitch voice.

You really enjoy his care, it does fill you with joy. Then you reach out for your panties, but as you are pulling them up, he slides his hands under yours, taking the lead again, which surprises you even more. You are so overwhelmed with emotions at this point, you shake right into his hand as he pulls it all the way up, giving you a slight friendly chuckle, and blowing you a kiss right above the lining of your briefs, gaining him an immediate gasp from you. You're truly mesmerized by him.

He continues dressing himself, and as you calm down, you rush into his arms, facing his chest. He caresses and pets your face and head with one arm, for him to go onto groping your ass, and going down to your thighs. His hand lifts your skirt away from time to time, letting colder air in. After he finishes clothing up, he swings you to his other side and pushes you right to the desk.

“I need more of you. I need to feel you in more ways.” – he tells you with a shaky voice.

You almost even stumble, and with an utterly scared look on your face, you glance at him. Without precaution, he pushes you down onto the floor. You look down onto your legs. Your knees are together and your feet are far apart, completely side-tracking you. You even put your hands on your knees in a cute way, but as you lift your head, his cock gets into view, poking through his pants fly, which takes you aback.

Your first and immediate reaction is to press your lips all around him, kissing and licking his shaft as it pumps against your mouth. After growing tired and wanting more, he puts his thumb in your mouth, and with a few fingers latching onto your chin, he pushes downwards on your jaw. With closed eyes, you stick out your tongue, waiting for him to enter. He lets go off of his fingers from your face, following up with exactly what you expected. It feels way bigger than what you anticipated, leaving your mouth sore in the first minute, already. He’s being frantic with you, mouth fucking you without relent. You’re huffing for air as you whimper, but you aren’t getting any. You start to sob as he goes deeper down your throat. As you move your tongue in a swing like motion, from side to side, you circle the bottom of his shaft as he shoves himself in an out. You soak his cock with your saliva, blending with his precum. No matter how much of it you gulp down, It’s flowing out your mouth.

Resting his elbows and head above you on the desk, he looks down at the top of your head, as you suck him off. From the table, as he rocks you around, all kinds of documents fly off. Not that he cares, really.

Without even telling, he comes into your mouth, throbbing against your lips. You stomach it all as you look up to him, initiating eye contact, and smiling. After spewing out his cock, you grab it by the base and gently rub it off with a napkin. He pulls his zipper up, and kneels down. He parts your hair slightly and greets your forehead with a last smooch.

Looking back at you for the final time, he waves at you, winks in a mocking, yet sweet way and leaves though the door. You can only wish to meet soon in a similar fashion.

VI. Reflection

You’re at a loss of thoughts. He’s been so careful, yet so careless with you at the same time, and that’s just messing with your brain right now, so you lean your head against the desk, you close your eyes and give into the bliss once again.

Even after he left, you’re sitting in the dark, in the same position he left you in, with his tie still around your neck. You feel embarrassed, but you can’t help yourself as you take in the scent of his tie, pleasuring yourself through your clothes, while thinking about him. He has a hold on you, and you know that well.

[agendergorgon]

I started out in the Worm fandom (superhero webnovel, very long) by writing a stupid fic about Worm's protagonist, bullied teen Taylor Hebert who is most famous for taking the often mocked power of insect control to such ludicrous extents that any other bug controlling villain looks positively , getting the powers of a big dumb monster from Evolve and going rawr and smash. I think it was cos it was the done thing at the time, cos I'd not written any fic before, and cos I liked Evolve. I've gone back and forth over the years but I think just smooshing Worm and another powerset you like or think might be fun to write is an over saturated market but its a market that exists. A bit after that and a few embarassing rewrites or other attempts at the same sort of thing, and one hit that I kinda just kept making after people seemed to like it, and I ended up making DADA, a parody of Worm fics in the style of the usual kind of crack fic where nonsense is substituted for plot and its more about jokes than saying much. There were a couple of jokes about trends in the wider Worm fandom but the main selling point is that Taylor's power is ill defined and never elaborated upon much, and that her costume is a papier mache version of her own face.

Like so. I fuckin love this pic, credit to Pericardium who drew this after I'd sorta given up after one arc, leaving all the notes for future chapters and where to take the story as one ugly ill put together mess of a final chapter. For the longest while, this picture was the last thing left of DADA if you clicked past that ending. And it still sorta is. This is the face of DADA. Most common thing anyone said was "Why does it look like that" or talking about how it startled them scrolling across the banner on r/wormfanfic. Peri got this down perfectly, a portrait not of Taylor Hebert but of the lumpy doll fanfic likes to make of her. I made a stupid mistake a few years down the line. I decided to keep writing DADA. Like a zombie limping back to life, or a Rob Zombie limping a franchise back to life, DADA returned with plans and aspirations and ideas for a new ending and went from a brief read it over a cup of tea fic to something that had to commit to its jokey bits, something trying to be more meta than it ought to have been and barely communicating itself well. So it died again with a new ending written out same way as it was last time, in crumbs and snippets and morsels. DADA is a curse of mine that limps back to life whenever I have a new silly idea for it. Its a world that runs on wordplay and Amelia Bodelia logic and entertains cartoonish misconceptions of how people's superpowers work. (Where notorious villain Jack Slash can project the cuts of his knives to strike from extended distances, the Jack Slash of DADA makes his knives shrink and grow to physically extend as far as he is reaching with them) Its a world where villains from my other fanfics have invaded it as a superfluous additional set of antagonists. So yeah, here's DADA, its a bit impermeable without exposure to fandom memes and it changes its mind on what it is constantly throughout, but my fiance likes it so I'm gonna keep updating it as long as I have ideas on where to take it. Taylor is dead, wormfic above all.

[nihilnovisubsole]

Because of your latest post: not sure if you’ve answered this before, but how does someone even entertain the idea of writing for the game dev industry? Did you start out on indie games or just write before and show them your work? Since it’s such a subjective field etc

if i have, it bears repeating! here's a rough timeline of what i did. never discount the value of luck and the kindness of friends

2016: i was doing a random freelance transcription job when i saw @theivorytowercrumbles post about writing for voltage. they reblogged the studio's open casting call for new writers. since it was so lenient - no experience, fanfic samples allowed - i applied. they hired me for their new project, but let me go after a trial period, citing that the tone of my writing was a bad fit for that game. i foundered for a while after that. i don't take rejection well. i started dangerous crowns to try to make money from writing some other way.

2017: one of voltage's producers reached out to me and said they'd started another project that i was a good fit for. she felt letting me go was a mistake and wanted to snap me back up. i said yes, i mean, are you kidding? so i started on reiner's route.

2018-2019: i kept at it. i took on diego's route. it occurred to me that i wasn't making very much money, but i liked my coworkers, and i was building my portfolio, so who cared? i also finished dangerous crowns, and a handful of people bought it, but certainly not enough to support myself or anything.

early 2020: between the pay and creative differences with voltage's team, it started to sink in that i needed to find other work. i applied to the few open game writer jobs i could find, but with only mobile romance in my portfolio, i got nowhere. i threw in dangerous crowns samples. i tried to network on twitter. i still never made it to the interview phase. i foundered for a while again.

late 2020: the voltage writers went on strike. i gave a statement to a journalist that one of obsidian's narrative designers noticed. we became acquaintances over it. another old friend of mine threw me a life raft in the form of a different contract, better paying, on a non-romance indie game. i took it gladly. i added a twine game to my portfolio, too. i kept applying. i got a few interviews, but something still didn't click.

2021: i finally accepted that i needed formal help. i did a portfolio workshop. i got resume coaching. the coach passed my name to a writer on the company of heroes team. they liked me! they also paid me more money than i'd ever seen in my life. at the same time, obsidian advertised a narrative job opening. i applied on a lark and let my ND pal know i was doing so. why not, right? college-new-vegas-fan me would want me to. they rejected me, but not before i passed their writing test and two interviews. i had nothing to lose at that point, so i told my ND pal that i was bummed. she gave me a golden piece of advice: "you came really close. try again."

2022: obsidian had another narrative opening. i threw myself at it. i was now going to annoy them into hiring me. since i was a known quantity from applying six months before, they had no qualms about interviewing me again. this time, it worked out, and i've been there ever since.

what's the common denominator here? i met people who thought i was all right and gave me a hand up when i needed it. the standard advice is to work with a community of your peers instead of trying to get your heroes to senpai-notice you. it's not that they don't care - they just have their own thing going on, and your peers could be the heroes of tomorrow if the right project comes along. i also found the portfolio was the end-all-be-all when it came to job hunting. i went through a grieving process with that! i'm not afraid to admit it. i wish studios had held my degree or dangerous crowns in higher regard, but i just had to make games in a wider variety of genres, and that was that.

one caveat: narrative is a really saturated field right now. a lot of people want to write, and there aren't many openings. it's not uncommon for big studios to get hundreds of applicants. larian probably got over a thousand for the job they posted recently. i feel awful saying that, because i don't want to discourage you, but i'd feel worse if i didn't let you know what you were getting into. if it's something you want, you should try! keep an open mind about the random projects you may find. you never know where they'll take you.

[lolokouhm]

FUSHIGOVER pt. IV [AFTER ALL]

1 / 2 / 3 / 4

just a small fluffy addition to the III <3

Megumi Fushiguro's hair was simply the best.

There'd always been something in the way it grew taller instead of getting longer, messier with every week he didn't visit a hairdresser. The way it moved every time he ran during our training sessions, soft but spikey. The way those black strands stuck to his forehead, wet and sticky from the drops of sweat forming on his pale skin.

That evening, his hair was freshly washed and dried. I could easily tell. Fushiguro was the type who would put on the sunscreen, enjoy the gossip without showing the undoubted interest in the subject and take pictures of especially pretty sunsets. He would then sit in his phone, changing the exposure and saturation, so it’d look even better. When the four of us would go shopping, he’d quietly follow us around, but he’d loudly voice his opinions on Nobara’s outfits - without any hesitation. He’d hesitate about mine though.

Well, my fashion sense was questionable. At least my taste in men wasn't.

"(Y/N), have you ever heard about Gashadokuro?"

"No", I replied, trying not to lose my focus. "Or...", I scratched my forehead. Gashadokuro... For some reason, the name didn't feel completely unfamiliar. "Wait. I have."

"You have?"

"Yeah. My grandma used to tell me that it would take me away if I kept stealing the candy from her cupboard. I even googled it once." Yup, I'd done that. When I was seven. An unforgettable experience. "Is it like... a theory or something that you're rather sure of?"

"It's just a hunch..." Megumi shook his head slowly. "But it would make sense. According to the mythology Gashadokuro is a youkai, but it might be something connected with the Ten Shadows. Still, it doesn't make a lot of sense. We went to Kioto to look for something that would help us, but we came back empty-handed." His hand finally got out of the shadow. "We'll keep on looking. This might..." There it was again. That look. "This might help us kill him."

We sat like that for a while, in complete silence. I wasn't really sure what to say - I had no idea which part of the story he'd just introduced me to was the most surprising. Maybe the simple fact that he'd actually said all of those things?

"Let's go back. It's your party." I finally managed to get my thoughts straight. "You need to have a drink. You deserve it the most."

Megumi sighed, but propped himself up.

"Yuuji's got some serious brain damage for organising that."

"I mean, technically, most of the us thought you'd end up to be the one with the biggest brain damage." Oh God, shut up, woman. "I'm sorry. It's not funny." I really was an idiot. Nervously, I checked on him to see how much ACTUAL DAMAGE the joke had made.

Megumi seemed unaffected by my words.

"I'd thought so too."

And just like that, that feeling was back. The uneasy one.

"Some guys thought you wouldn't come back." I really hoped those words would come out of my mouth and sound relatively okay, but in the end, they were nothing more but a mere whisper. I was a freaking masochist. I apparently loved to torture myself.

"And you?", he asked after a few seconds. "Did you think I wouldn't come back?"

I'd always found the silence between us soothing. I knew he didn't like talking too much, or rather, he had some trouble with expressing his thoughts. I wasn't like that, but it was different with Fushiguro. It was nice. It was calm.

"No", I answered with a complete certainty. "I knew you'd return."

After all, you're Megumi Fushiguro, aren't you?

[memphisnovels]

Evermore

Chapter 23. Safe and sound

Previous chapter

Masterlist

18+ chapter

MDNI

I can't lie, they are everything to me This chapter is spicy (more than 1 chili pepper spicy)<3

pairing: Pietro Maximoff x OFC

warnings: spice, tension, flirty flirty behavior, Pietro being cheeky, some angst (par for the course), domestic bliss.

I kept a few paces before him the entire walk, neither of us breaking the silence that sat heavy between us. By the time we stepped into the reception office my hair was drenched and clinging to me, much like my clothes that the still falling snow had melted through, saturated me. My teeth were chattering, limbs shaking as I spoke to the woman behind the front desk. The news that there was still one room available was a relief adding to the range of feelings I was experiencing presently. The room was significantly warmer than outside, yet the shivering only worsened. There was a single queen-sized bed in the center, and a small tv and kitchenette in the corner beside a door that I assumed led to the bathroom. Pietro went straight to the heater, turning it up to the highest setting as I grabbed all of the blankets from the cupboards, laying them on the bed before beginning to peel off my coat. My teeth were chattering so loudly that it caught Pietro’s attention, and, in an instant, he was before me, attempting to help me undress. I moved away from him, removing the rest of my clothing until I was left in the only dry items, my bra and underwear. Pietro did the same, left in only our undergarments we grabbed blankets and huddled before the heater. I grasped the soft material to my flesh closing my eyes tightly and bringing my knees to my chest. The teeth-chattering didn’t let up, my body still shaking and stinging from the cold that seemed to be clinging to me. I could feel Pietro’s gaze on me. “Nadia-”

“No.” I cut him off.

His tone shifted, no amusement, lightness or room for argument. “Stop now. I’m not letting you get hypothermia just because you’re stubborn.” My eyes slowly traveled over to his form as he opened his blanket covered arms and beckoned me over. I rolled my eyes at him, swallowing heavily and willing the cold to go away. When it didn’t and my body began to physically shudder with it, I sighed exasperatedly and crawled over to the man who immediately wrapped my up in himself and the blanket when my back pressed to his chest. “God, you’re freezing, why do you have to be so fucking resistant to help.” I didn’t respond as he enveloped me completely, pressing with exceedingly warm flesh to mine, acting as my personal furnace.

Slowly but surely, my teeth stopped chattering and my shaking calmed as his heat seeped into me, warming me to my bones. At some point the tenseness in my body eased slightly as I allowed him to take away the biting coldness.

I gave him a short glance over my shoulder before turning back to the plain brick wall that was before us. There was a silence between us that was so thick it felt as though it was practically strangling me, yet I refused to break it first. A S.H.I.E.L.D. assigned therapist once told me I tended to favor avoidant capabilities in times of emotional conflict; Pietro moved to sit by the fire beside me and I managed to see her point as I stared ahead at the place spot where the paint had begun to peel.

“So now you’re pissed off at me?” I didn’t respond at first, ignoring the feeling of his intense gaze burning into the side of my head. He didn’t falter once, unyielding as he stared at me. “That’s fair, could you maybe talk to me though?”

The look I gave him must have given away at least a portion of how incensed I was as he closed his eyes for a long moment before giving me a sheepish smile. I clenched my hands into fists at my sides, taking a deep breath. “I’m not pissed off at you.”

He glanced down at my hands. “Right.”

“I’m trying to be a rational adult, so just give me a second to not be so mad.” He nodded, looking straight ahead again. The silence lasted approximately 3 seconds before he spoke again.

“I’m sorry I held us up, I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

I closed my eyes tightly, taking a deep breath as I leaned back slightly further against his chest. “Don’t be sorry, I’m not mad about that at all, I���m sorry I snapped at you.” He pressed a kiss so gentle to my cheek I barely felt it. Though, the meaning was not lost on me. “I just want you to tell me what’s going on, I don’t like the weird tension between us right now.”

“It’s kind of complicated.”

I shrugged, looking back at him “So? You’ve been strange since the other night, whatever it is, just say it.”

He opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water and I could see the battle in his eyes, the struggle to find the words. My mind reeled, running over everything that had happened since that night. Every word, every kiss, every touch.

Then I thought maybe I understood.

I moved out of his arms, sitting cross-legged before him, wrapping the other blanket around myself. “If you don’t want to touch me… in that way, you don’t have to… just say that.”

The only way to describe the look in his eyes then was pure distress. He dropped his head into his hands and groaned dramatically. “Jesus fucking Christ, Nadia, I want to touch you.” I narrowed my eyes at him opening my mouth to respond only to be cut off. “God, you have no idea how badly I want to touch you. It is all I’ve thought of for months, honestly, I’ve wanted this since the moment I met you.”

My heart rate picked up slightly at his words. “Well, then why have you been acting so weird and avoiding me?”

“Because I wanted it to be your decision.”

I asked him what he meant.

“I didn’t want you to feel pressured. I meant what I said that night, it couldn’t be some heat of the moment decision that you’d regret, I couldn’t take that, I didn’t want you to change your mind and the only way I felt like I could be sure that you were sure is if you initiated things.”

His words baffled me, truly astonished me. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. This had to be some kind of joke, yet his gaze was earnest and pained and I felt like slapping him across his pretty face. “You are the most idiotic person I have ever met.” His expression turned indignant, but I continued before he could interrupt. “I quite literally took my clothes off in front of you this morning and that wasn’t a clear enough initiation?”

Both his eyebrows rose as I spoke. “T-that was not as clear as you think it was.”

My eyes narrowed at him. “I told you to take my underwear off, Pietro.”

He snickered slightly even as a flush travelled up his neck. “Okay touché, but, in my defense… you are a tease.”

“Me?!” My tone dripped with disbelief as I shoved his shoulder. “You’re the one always starting things he can’t finish.”

“Hey, I absolutely can finish it, I’m just a gentleman.”

I shrugged. “Oh right, so you’re only all talk when it comes to me then. I guess I’ll just have to take your word for the rest of it.” The second the words left my mouth there was an evident shift in Pietro’s expression which had a shiver rushing down my spine.

“I don’t like that tone.” Before I could even think of a retort his lips were on mine, kissing me hungrily. I felt the way the air changed between us, frustration melting into something entirely different. His hand smoothed up my thigh gripping it tightly. “So… just to be clear you’re asking me to prove it to you?” I nodded and he yanked my leg, causing me to fall into his lap swiftly. His lips kissed along my jaw, cold fingers fiddling with the hem of my shirt. “Say the words, Nadia.” I furrowed my eyebrows at him. “Tell me what you want.” My lips hovered over his as I looked down into his piercing gaze.

“You’d like that wouldn’t you?”

His grip on my thigh tightened and his hand slipped up slightly, pushing my blanket up with it. “Yes, I would, and if you want me to give you something you’d like, you’ll start listening.” His hand rose a little further, eclipsed by the fabric of the blanket as it ventured beneath. Goosebumps rose across my skin as I felt his other hand wrap around the back of my neck pulling me down against his lips again.

“I want you, Pietro. If that wasn’t obvious.” I felt his lips curving into a smirk against mine.

“Oh, it was, but I’d appreciate a little less attitude.”

I bit back a laugh, swallowing my pride and giving, just slightly. His hair was slightly damp from the snow that had touched it when we’d been outside, it caused the drying pieces to fall messily around his eyes, sticking up when I ran my fingers through it. He looked handsome like this, not I didn’t find him frustratingly handsome normally. My fingertips smoothed over his cheek, and I pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “I want you.” I smiled “All of the time.” I recounted the words he’d spoken to me after Amsterdam. Within seconds he’d moved to his feet and hoisted me up to wrap my legs around his waist.

“You have me.”

{MDNI}

That was the last thing he said before our surroundings blurred and my back hit the plush hotel bed. Pietro brought warmth with him when he crawled atop me, lips on mine the second he was above me. The imprint of his hands felt as though it burned me, but not in a way that made me pull back or flinch but in a way that had me craving more. I helped him push the blanket back off of his shoulders, leaving them bare. As soon as the fabric was cleared, I was guiding his lips back to mine and wrapping my arms around his neck. His hand travelled down my hip, hooking my thigh over his hip so he could lay further against me. I gasped into his mouth as his fingertips danced just below the band of my bra. With a single hand in the center of his chest I pushed him back, moving with him to sit upright and slip from beneath him. His Adam’s apple bobbed heavily as he watched me unclasp my bra, the straps fell slowly down my arms before I slid the fabric completely off of my body. His eyes trailed from my own to take in the sight of my now bare chest, that heaved slightly with the tension of the moment. I walked toward him, letting my knee sink into the soft duvet on either side of him, settling onto his lap again and kissing him eagerly. One of his hands stroked my cheek tenderly, the other laying limp at his side. I grinned against his lips, smoothing my hand over his shoulder and down his bicep to grasp his wrist and move the limb upward. His eyes tracked the movement, completely mesmerized as I flattened his palm over one of my breasts. The still slightly chilly air of the room, combined with his proximity had the sensitive flesh stiffening under his palm. I kissed him yet again, lips parting to allow his tongue to make contact with mine.

“You’re usually so talkative, what happened?”

“Well, it’s not exactly easy to make conversation when your half naked and looking at me like you are.”

I raised an eyebrow. “How am I looking at you?”

His gaze darkened slightly as his lips drew into a thin line, his patience evidently wearing thin. My back arched and a sound of sharp pleasure fell from my lips when he fingertips pinched one of my nipples. “I think you know.”

When his hands moved downwards my heart rate picked up yet again, thrumming against my sternum as his fingers teased over my inner thigh, sliding around to slip just beneath the waistband of my panties. I could feel just how eager he was beneath me, prompting me to slide a little further into his lap. The sensation of him hard and pressing against me had a hum emanating from me. His hands moved to grip my hips tightly, dragging me over him at a pace that was excruciating and completely addictive at the same time. My head fell back slightly, the sound he made going straight between my legs.

“Wait.” I spoke up, pulling back just slightly. He stopped immediately, looking up at me with pupils that just about eclipsed his irises. I bit my lip before pressing another kiss to his lips because apparently, I hadn’t tasted enough of them yet. Forcing myself to pull away again I sighed, rolling my shoulders back before meeting his eyes again. “There’s just… I’ve never…” I shrugged, a flush travelling up my chest. “You know.”  He raised an eyebrow at me, lips quirking up at the corners. “I’ve never had an orgasm alright! Honestly, I don’t think I can.” I looked down, my voice quietening at the end. Pietro’s fingers tugged my chin back up to look at him.

“It’s okay.”

I shook my head. “I don’t know what it is, there’s something wrong with me, I guess. I just don’t want you to get your hopes up.”

His eyes softened, brows furrowing slightly. He tugged me toward him by the hips, flattening his hand to slide it over my thigh. In one swift maneuver he’d pulled me on top of him, settling me on his lap. His hands returned to my hips once more. “There is nothing wrong with you, Nadia. Being with you is all I want so how could I ever be disappointed when I get to do that?”

“Are you saying sweet things to me so you’ll get lucky?”

“I never dreamed I would get this lucky.” His lips were on mine then, firm and passionate and my nerves melted slightly. The way his lips felt against mine was entrancing and utterly addicting, I never wanted it to end. “I know that you think you can’t and maybe that’s true, but I still want to try, if you’re okay with it.”

His words had me breathless, or maybe it was less his words and more the way he looked at me as he spoke them. His lips were parted and glistening, eyes half lidded, dark lashes fluttered.

I kissed him again. “Okay.” I was on my back in seconds, giggling a little at his fervor. Pietro’s kisses dipped around my jaw, travelling down my neck but taking their sweet time on their journey, imprinting himself on each crevice of my flesh that was revealed to him. At first, I was nervous that being on my back would trigger a panic reaction, but as his mouth mapped a scorching path between my breasts, the red room was the furthest thing from my mind. I watched as he parted my legs, mind whirring and heart thrumming rhythmically against my sternum. I felt hot all over, flushed and powerless in a way that I craved. It was a feeling no one had ever sparked in me. My legs were trembling already and my chest heaved as he peeled the leggings from me at an excruciating pace before settling between my legs, head dipping to nip at my inner thigh. I gasped at the sting feeling his lips upturn as he kissed the place he’d bitten.

“Remember when you used to pretend you hated me?” I glanced down to see him peering up at me, shit-eating grin on his face. “Because I do.”

I rolled my eyes at him. “What a perfect time to talk about this.”

He snickered. Pressing another kiss to my thigh, fingers digging into the flesh a little. I bit my lip, working hard to not cant my hips up toward him. “I remember it very well. You were such a little shit, sauntering into training in those tight little outfits and being so mean to me. Do you have any idea how badly I wanted you? How hard it was to have you talk so much shit to me every day and not be able to do anything about it.”

“Are you going to keep on talking or are you going to finally do something about it?” The smirk that crossed his lips was positively devious, eyes darkening as he took my panties in his hand, a tearing sound following. The ruined fabric clutched in his hand before he threw it over his shoulder. “I liked those, you idiot.”

He only smiled at me, parting my legs again and falling between them. He pressed a kiss to my pelvis, rendering me completely speechless. He sent me one more gentle look before his mouth was on me and all thoughts simultaneously drained from my head. My legs snapped shut instinctively but he caught them, prying them open once more, not parting from me for even a moment. I threw my head back, mouth falling open as pleasure flooded through me. It had never felt like this before. Only one other person had done this to me, and I’d never been more uncomfortable but when it was Pietro everything was different. I felt like I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t even function. It was like being struck by lightning.

Sounds fell from my lips that I didn’t think I was capable of making as he licked and sucked hard on the bundle of nerves. He hummed against me, the noise pleasure-filled and completely content. I bit down on my bottom lip hard as my hips canted upward. He laid his arm over my pelvis, holding me still whilst reaching up to grab my hand and intertwine our fingers. I fisted the duvet in my free hand. “Fucking hell, Pietro.” I barely managed to get the words out. The sound that left him resembled a snort, but I didn’t have it in me to be annoyed when he was making me feel like this. He lifted his head from me, bringing our conjoined hands to his mouth and kissing my knuckles before letting go. With his free hand he kneaded the flesh of my thigh, pressing a gentle kiss against my clit that had me shuddering. His fingers smoothed down my leg and along the place where his mouth had been. My heart rate picked up again. I used my free hand to grip the sheets by my head, biting down hard on my bottom lip as Pietro doubled down in his efforts.

“Just relax.” He hummed against me. I hadn’t even realized how tense I was. “You can let go; I’ve got you… I’m never going to let anything happen to you, just let go.”

When it began, I was momentarily immobilized. Every nerve ending was blown to pieces and my eyes rolled back. I was faintly aware of Pietro grabbing my legs to keep them open, his lips remaining attached to me as the sensations ravaged my body. Tears formed in my eyes from the immenseness of the pleasure.

My chest rose and fall frantically as I attempted to catch my breath, Pietro beginning to kiss a path back up my body and when my eyes met his again, he was positively beaming.

He kissed me softly giving me a taste before pulling back to speak. “Glad we cleared that up.”

I laughed pushing my hair back out of my face. His fingertips caressed the flesh of my cheek as he laid against me. “Just give me a minute then we can go on.”

His smile grew as he brushed his nose over my cheek. “You’re tired, I am too. Let’s just go to sleep.”

“But what about you?”

“I already told you, all I want is to be with you.” He kissed me again. “Plus, I’m not planning on disappearing anytime soon.”

What had happened at the tree farm was still heavy on my mind as I laid beside Pietro, even with the very distracting events that had just taken place. These strange visions didn’t seem to be going away anytime soon, in fact they seemed to have gotten worse since Sokovia. They didn’t make any sense to me, the song that I kept hearing, the unrecognizable voices that spoke to me, the man in the glasses. It all seemed so disconnected and yet it was as though my body, my mind was trying so desperately to tell me something in a language I didn’t understand. I figured that this was one of those things Anna and Natasha would berate me for keeping to myself but sharing it with anyone seemed unthinkable until I’d somewhat figured out their cause.

In the morning, sunlight filtered into the room through the little crevice where the curtains didn’t quite cover the window, prompting me to turn away. I reached my arm out to feel the cold empty spot that had once been occupied. When my eyes opened, I found myself in the same hotel room as last night, only there was no Pietro. I sat up, rubbing my eyes before pushing myself up out of the warm bed. I collected my now dry clothes from the backs of the chairs and dressed before approaching the front door. A glance outside solved the missing Pietro issue as I watched him get out of the car that had been stuck in the snow now, coffee in hand. I narrowed my eyes at him as he approached, smiling at me when our eyes met.

“For you.” He spoke, offering the cup to me. My eyes travelled between it and the car.

“How?”

He gestured for me to take the coffee. A sip of the beverage warmed me from the inside out, or maybe that was just the way he was looking at me. “I have my ways.” He murmured.

…

“I bought you something.” Pietro held out something brown and plastic that was mostly covered by his hands.

Upon closer inspection I quickly realized what it was, the corner of my mouth tugging upward slightly. I looked from the chocolate custard to him, questioningly. “How did you know I like these.”

“I saw Anna bring them for you when you were hurt after Sokovia, and again after Amsterdam.” I smiled down at the sealed snack, my face flushing slightly. “I figured it could be dessert.”

“Dessert?”

He took a step closer to me, lifting my chin with his thumb and forefinger. “I’m cooking for us tonight.”

“Good luck keeping it just us.” I laughed. The corner of his lips upturned as he began collecting the ingredients from the fridge. I raised an eyebrow at him. “You did not tell them, did you?” He shrugged. “They are never going to let us live this down, you know that right?” As much as I tried to find it in me to scowl, a smile managed to break through. I wandered aimlessly behind him, attempting to find a way to help him, eventually picking up some of the vegetables he had out to begin washing them.

“Hey, none of that! I told you; I’m cooking for you.”

“But it will be quicker if I help.”

He narrowed his eyes at me. “I’m not going to change my mind, sit down and let me do this for you.”

“I don’t need you to do it for me.”  Before I could protest any further the tools were taken from me and my feet were off of the ground as Pietro slipped me onto the countertop, planting a firm kiss on my head.

“All you need to do is sit there and look pretty.” He spoke, causing me to roll my eyes at him. “You’re a natural already.” His words were as they often were, a little teasing and brimming with sweetness.

Soft music began filling the room then, courtesy of F.R.I.D.A.Y. I’d guess. Pietro hummed along to it, dancing his way back over to the stove and adding an array of items to a hot pan. I watched his every move, studying as I often did. His hair fell over his forehead as he looked down, a little messy as always but I thought he looked best like this, natural, unpolished. The muscles in his for arms tensed slightly as he chopped the beef. I had no idea what he was making but it wasn’t long before a mouth-watering smell filled the kitchen. He sent me numerous sidelong smiles, eventually bringing me a glass of white wine and pressing kiss to my lips.

“Did your mother teach you to make this too?” His blue eyes glinted with something unreadable as they fell on me then. “You told me she taught you to make goulash, did she teach you to make this too?”

He smiled, gaze lingering on me for a long moment before it returned to the pan before him. “She taught me to make a lot of things, but not this. I’ve actually never made this before.” The first hint of nervousness was evident in his voice then. I strained to try and see what was in the pan, onions and beef, I couldn’t make out the rest.

“What is it.” He moved to stand between my legs, prompting me to widen them to accommodate him. One of his hands sat on my hip, the other resting on the counter beside me.

“You’ll see.”

I attempted to bite back my smile, raising my eyebrows at him. “How very mysterious of you.” When we kissed then it was searing, branding me in every way. I ran my fingers through his soft hair, committing the way his lips felt to my memory. He was leaving tomorrow he and Sam were heading somewhere in South America for a search and rescue mission. I was blurry on the details, too focused on the prospect of Pietro being in harms way. Of course, I’d never voice those concerns to anyone, but they’d been rampant on my mind since the moment he told me he was going. It wasn’t as though he’d never been in danger on a mission before, the difference was I’d always been there to make sure he got back in one piece. I’d never worked with Same before, come to think of it, I barely ever really knew him outside of the fact that cap trusts him. Even though I reminded myself that I trusted Steve’s judgement wholeheartedly, my skin still crawled. “Do you trust Sam?”

“Really? You’re thinking about another man while I’m kissing you?” I ignored his taunt. Chewing the inside of my cheek as I thought about every interaction I’d had with the man. “You don’t need to worry about me.” He played with a strand of my hair, twirling it and eventually tucking it behind my ear. “I really, really like that you do, but everything is going to be fine.”

“So, you trust him?”

“I trust you.” Our eyes met again. “And I know that, normally, when you aren’t overthinking, you trust Sam.” His thumb brushed over my bottom lip, and he brought his other hand up to rub along my forearm that rested on his shoulder. “I’m a big boy, I can look after myself. Although, it is very hot when you get all protective.”

I rolled my eyes at him, snorting at his antics. His attention was soon drawn back to the meal he was preparing when the pot of water began boiling.

Before me Pietro placed a plate of pasta with a rich creamy sauce over it. I inspected my plate carefully, leaning in to take a whiff of the beefy smell. “What is it?” I asked, swirling my fork through the dish.

“Beef stroganoff.”

I paused momentarily, a smile tugging at my lips. “Where are the potatoes?” I teased, glancing back down at the plate.

Pietro smiled sheepishly at me. “Well, I wanted to make you something Russian, but I read that pasta is a romantic food.”

“You read that? Where?”

He opened and closed his mouth a few times before looking back down at his own place, a pink tinge taking over his cheeks as he muttered something almost incoherent. Almost. “I googled it.”

“You googled romantic foods?”

He nodded slowly, still looking down at his plate, his cheeks reddening even more. A warm feeling filled the pit of my stomach as I watched him. I slid my hand across the table placing it over the top of his and using my thumb to rub back and forth. Then, I picked up my fork once more and dug in, finishing every bit of the meal he’d made me, only stopping when the plate was clear, and Pietro was no longer embarrassed.

…

I found myself unable to sleep that night, even as I lay there full and content, my mind refused to shut off. One would think with the amount I’d tossed and turned my body would have worn itself out, yet still, as darkness blanketed the compound and F.R.I.D.A.Y. fed quiet city sounds into my room, I laid wide awake.

Moonlight filtered in through the windows that lined the corridor as I snuck quietly through the compound, bathing my flesh in smooth silver light. I hesitated as my hand hovered over the door, feeling slightly foolish. The thought occurred to me that knocking might wake someone else up, inevitably leading to teasing that I’d rather not contend with. I lowered my hand slightly, considering simply returning to my room and forcing myself to sleep, yet just as my hand was about to drop to my side the door swung open, and a mess of silver hair was revealed to me. Pietro rubbed at his eyes for a second as if attempting to decipher if he was dreaming, he looked warm in his long cotton pajama pants and dark blue t-shirt. He was warm, I realized as took a hold of my hand, tugging me over the threshold and into his arms. We laid together, neither of us uttering a single word, Pietro’s arms wrapped around me, enveloping me in him. And there, with only the sound of his steady breath beside my ear, I fell asleep.

[tenpintsof-sundrop]

See this is something I find pretty upsetting because clearly this means that the point of the original post went way over your head.

This is from a post where I was talking about the general state of fandom - where people don't engage with anything unless they can steal it to make money off it in some way. And I remarked about a particular post of mine getting 800 notes overnight without getting a single comment in that timeframe.

And truly, what I meant was that the post got 800 likes, which is far different from 800 reblogs - a post with 800 reblogs is a roaring hit and and a post with 800 likes... not so much.

Especially considering that 800 likes on a Tumblr post is not at all comparable to 800 kudos on AO3.

To me, the problem with 800 people liking my post but not getting any reblogs or comments - well, it's like if you gave a Ted Talk. 800 people saw what your topic was, agreed that they wanted to spend their time listening to give a speech, so 800 people came into the room, sat down, listened to you, and then there was just complete dead silence at the end instead of applause. 800 people all just awkwardly staring at you.

And for the record, I am not asking 800 people to reblog and comment on my fic. I am asking for 2 or 5 or maybe 10 people out of 800 to do so. 2 people applauding in a room of 800 still sounds pathetic, but that is all I am asking for.

And the comparison of kudos to Tumblr likes is just so inaccurate. With my fics, I put a readmore on all of them, so 800 likes on a fic means that maybe 70% of people actually read the fic and maybe the other 30% were just browsing through and saw the summary and gave it a like to read it for later.

The kudos button is always at a bottom of a fic after you have opened it, so it guarantees that the person giving you kudos read your entire fic and enjoyed it.

Also - you can also give kudos once. So AO3 hits on a fic could indicate someone revisiting a fic multiple times to reread it after they have already given kudos. (Which is why comments are so powerful. You can leave multiple comments telling the author how much you love their work and how rereadable it is to you.)

Same thing with reblogs. You can reblog someone's work multiple times to show them appreciation and it's free and takes almost no effort.

Also, for the record, I am not a popular writer. My fics don't get hundreds of notes consistently. My least popular fics have sub 60 notes and at least a dozen of those are me reblogging them over and over again in an attempt to promote them.

When I am talking about a fic getting 800 notes overnight, it's because that fic is for a popular character from a popular fandom - which is even more frustrating, because people are less likely to comment when their fandom is over saturated with content and they feel spoiled by it. And I really want to change that culture. Even if a character has thousands of fics on their tag, each fic should be treasured, celebrated, and appreciated.

Basically, if I say "wow 800 people saw this fic and nobody bothered to comment. That makes me feel really shitty" you don't have to say "well, 800 people saw it. You're lucky."

I want fics with 800 notes or 20 notes to get more comments and more reblogs. That is always the point of my posts.

[ultfreakme]

Cn I ask your top favorite fics that you've written (feel free how much that you want to list)? Why they're special to you? Is there a specific inspiration when you wrote them? Thanks....

Hey anon!!! Thanks for the ask!! Favorite fics...I've written. You've given me too much freedom by asking my why I like them I am so sorry for the wall of text about to hit.

To Veer The Tides

It's a fic for Kuroko no Basuke which is basically just me slapping the character names onto a WILDLY different fantasy setting. It's for Akashi x Furihata. An arranged marriage AU where Akashi is the son of an emperor who went too power hungry and wanted to consolidate 7 mostly independent states(provinces??) into one, but he was defeated by the remaining states and to control Akashi, he is arranged to marry far below his station to Furihata, son of a destroyed noble house which is under the rule of Kagami's state. So it's about Akashi climbing back to power with Furihata initially thinking Akashi is pure evil but he soon realizes that maybe Akashi and his family aren't as evil as the people believe.

I ended up doing so much research, world-building and character expansion. It's more political intrigue than romance, lol. I still love that fic to death, I think I honestly peaked there for world-building, at least. I wrote it immediately after reading and watching Mo Dao Zu Shi and being first introduced to the concept of cultivation as a magic system and really wanted to put all my faves in flowy robes and long hair.

I want to get back to it, but I've discontinued it because I am simply not qualified to right about Dissociative Identity Disorder, systems and alters. Akashi has a terribly stereotypical portrayal of it in canon and I thought maybe I could research enough to write that, but I just, I don't know any systems and I felt like if I can't respect it, I didn't want to do it.

But it's still my favorite in terms of the world and aesthetics I had going on for it.

2. Tell Me Your Story (I'll Tell You Mine)

My current baby. The one I incessantly post about and draw for. Single-handedly over saturating the kyoshi warrior sokka x blue spirit zuko market. It's set in the canon world but I had to do so much research for this one too. I learned a lot, I think, while writing this. Big lesson being never ever write in present tense but if you're 200K+ words into it there is simply no going back RIP.

It started as just a silly romance because I thought it'd be funny to have Sokka and Zuko be completely oblivious to who they like. But as I began plotting and writing, it transformed into me projecting all my issues with colonialism and using the ATLA setting as base to dip a little bit deeper into the themes the show itself brings up, and some issues that it doesn't. Like, how colonialism uses your own culture against you, how it makes you fear who you are, makes you do things you don't want.

I deliberately chose that title because lots of indigenous communities in the world have lost their stories because of colonialism. Oral traditions and tales that are forgotten because people were killed and forced to never repeat them, forced to forget their languages. And that, really got to me. How colonialism slowly strips you of what makes human beings what they are; stories, art, music, dance, etc.

So this fic ended up being about how colonialism steals from you, uses what is yours AGAINST you and how it is important to embrace who you are and fight back.

3. Tell The Neighbours I'm Not Sorry

It's for Jon and Jay from DC Comics and Superfam. I wrote it when I was seeing a lot of biphobia against Jon and racism against Jay. As a bi asian, even if it was towards fictional characters, it was getting to me. People kept talking about how there's a specific way to be bi. Why did Jon never have a crisis about being queer? Why did Jon and Jay move so fast? Is Jay manipulating Jon just to get what he wants? It was all filled with a lot of stereotypes and biases.

Superman comics especially often taken up real world issues and puts it into the story. So I took all my anger and frustration from the biphobia and racism and wrote it into a fic.

It's about how there's no one way to being queer, and about how immigrants and non-white people are immediately classified as some kind of 'other' and 'bad' with zero grounding. It's also a little bit about colonialism on Jay's end. It's so charged with me going "FUCK IT!" and still somehow came out okay as a fic and I think I like that I managed to turn my anger into something productive.

Bonus

4. An Itajun fic I have not published and am still writing

It's my first JJK fic! It's an absolute mess in my drafts right now but I really like it, it's very fun for me. Junpei starts seeing and sensing curses far earlier because of built resentment from his bullies going too far and severely injuring him, his mom finds out and they move to Yuuji's area of Tokyo to get away from the school since they won't do anything about the bullying. Yuuji and Junpei run into each other and meet early at school. So the dynamics are kinda reversed, where Junpei is the one who is into the world of curses first while Yuuji has no clue, but they slowly interact and come together, forming a tight bond.

Junpei trusts no one and is dealing with all this curse nonsense trying to understand what it means. Yuuji is seemingly happy and chipper but he's going through tough times because his grandpa got hospitalized. It's both of them supporting each other and making sure the other isn't alone.

[amascomet]

Hi abt GS au, do the turtles have a favorite color/food/animal/etc??

Is there a Jennika, Venus, Kirby and/or Lita in your au?

Also is Leo on the spectrum? Just wondering :)

Those are definitely all things they gain the more April expands their world. Hope I don’t sound too confusing, but before April, having their own real preferences or desires wasn’t something they really considered. They haven’t really been allowed to have even the simplest choices. Like I feel like they’ve go no idea how many colors there actually are lol. If they knew I think they would’ve gone about dying their mask tails differently cause their mindset probably went something like -> “I like that but I’ll make mine blue cause I’m blue.”

Ok ok all that yapping for me to say that Leo likes pastel colors and hates really saturated or neon colors. Raph is indecisive and changes his favorite color constantly. Mikey likes the blues and oranges you’d see in a sunset. And Donnie does legitimately like the color purple lmao.

I like to occasionally joke about there being a fifth turtle (Jennika) that didn’t make it because Splinter ate her. He thought she was a gummy bear. Venus is in GS though but I rather not elaborate on her role too much but I hope you guys think she’s cool.

And yes! Leo is autistic. :) Truthfully I think all the turtles are a little autistic but with Leo it’s a lot more apparent.

[space-blue]

Speedpaint + quick tut on how I do Na'vi skin/stripes with video and screenshots

Here's the video to go along, but I'll go step by step with screenshots

We start with a base layer for the skin. I make a clip layer on top and be sure to also fill it the same base blue, because otherwise the blending properties of the brushes won't apply.

This is meant to be low detail so I won't give it too much colour, but I make the throat and centre of the face lighter, the eyes and ears pink/redder.

Then it's time to decide on light direction/angle and how it affects geometry. Doing a little of that really helps, but you don't have to paint the way I did there... Got lost in the sauce.

Add another clip layer on top, set it to multiply, and get started.

There are many ways to do stripes. I do mine entirely by hand, in a style of painting and erasing with the same brush but inverted. It's a lot like sculpting. Doing everything by hand guarantees a lack of uniformity. See the video for this step.

Now that I'm happy with the look I have, I UNCLIP the layer of stripes, revealing the places I went beyond the skin. That's fine.

Add a layer on top of Stripes. Clip it to stripe.

Right click on Stripe layer. Click "selection from layer > create selection"

Now you have a bar under the selection with shortcuts we're going to use.

Reduce the selection. The amount of pixels depends on the size of your drawing. Play around!

Now inverst the selection. So you're not drawing inside of it but outside of it only.

Select the multiply layer on top of the Stripes.

Paint in! In the reference above I used a deep purple to highlight what it should look like, but obviously you want a light blue.

Tweak colour and transparency of that layer as needed!

Then I use a blur brush (I prefer Maablur Brush, it's free iirc), and the soft eraser, in various areas so it's not entirely uniform.

See what the stripes look like on these people :

Q is quite dark with less light inside some sections. Meanwhile Neteyam has a very thin dark lining around his face stripes :

They're generally pretty desaturated. Body stripes also seem to be much more blurry in general :

Anyway, MERGE that multiple layer to the Stripe layer. CLIP the Stripe layer back to the skin.

Now it's time to erase or blur as you wish. I tend to erase around the nose, cheeks and throat.

Even Metkayina have that erased quality :

I add sanhi on a layer set to "add glow" and pick a teal colour. I either do it manually in pencil or with a dot brush.

Final tweaks of saturation and transparency, maybe playing around with "add" or "multiply" layers for quick highlights on top of everything or deeper shadows.

That's it! That's how I always do stripes, no matter how rendered the skin underneath. Elias needs more work before he's done, but it's a good preview, I hope.

[oscconfessions]

hey, mangoapple/🥭🍏 anon here, since everyone's giving their opinions on ii, i'd like to say mine!

so, i, in all honesty, reall6 love this show.

for further clarification, i really love season two of this show.

i know, basic opinion, but honestly, it's just the best one.

and i WANT to love the other ones the same. season one is just hard to watch because of the art style, especially early on, but i love the characters. bomb is great, salt and pepper are great, OJ is great, so on. over all a lot of characters are great. but it's just SO hard to sit through and especially hard to take seriously. that's my only real problem with it, though. the rest is fine.

season three? oh, don't get me started. as stated, i WANT to love it. i love goo, i love floory, i love silver (at some points), i love clover, i love a lot of the individual characters. but once again, the art style is hard to bear.

season two had a large style shift with the change in tone. it became darker, with more dynamic scenes and close-up angles. the elimination zone changed to an intense, firelit council that feels dramatic. more episodes started happening late at night or in dark places. it overall began to match the tone of the show, sad, dark, filled with action and lore.

iii, however? it ALSO went through a tonal shift later on, but everything still is sunny, saturated, almost washed out. it feels like they're trying to keep the viewer stimulated at all times.

and without the steve cobs drama to work off, we ended up with a bunch of new villains that were never necessary.

i know it may be missing the point of how, in-universe, mephone wants to keep the show running, never return to season two, leave it behind...but it feels honestly like the writers didn't know what to do next with s2 and came up with a whole new season just so they had something to do while they came up with more.

and i know iii was meant to be a silly, fun, lighthearted continuation of the series, but it just doesn't WORK. it STILL got dark, it STILL shifted. but in iii, it feels less like the serious, dramatic, lore-filled show that it once was, and more like the writers fumbling with and flopping its characters back and forth like fish out of water for some semblance of plot.

the original ii is fine and iii is just really disappointing to me, so that's why i believe ii2 has always been peak.

(also, we never got my favorite ii character, suitcase, back. she's honestly such an important part of season two to me because she's just central in so much drama!! she's interesting!! she's nervous and scared and imperfect, and i wish we got more from her!!)

~🥭🍏 anon

.

[status-quo-book]

Status Quo

Chapter 9- Sips and Slips

“Can I have some of your water? I don't usually get to talk this much and now my mouth is dry.”

Smiling as always, Canopy took the bottle from my hands, her tail flicking with delight. But the moment the liquid hit her tongue, her face contorted and she spat it into the grass.

“BLECK! That’s-” Her eyes met mine and she caught herself, returning to polite composure. “No… thank you.”

Accepting the bottle back, I took a swig to see what the problem was, but it just tasted like run-of-the-mill tap water. Though, based on her grimacing expression, I doubt she’d agree.

“What’s wrong with it?” I asked innocently as she hopped into the branches again. Hesitant to answer, she treaded lightly.

“It... It just doesn’t taste very good. Like chemicals and metal.”

Reaching the wide, thick leaves so big that they could be used as soup bowls, Canopy tipped the edge of the foliage down and took a long drink of fresh rainwater. In the sunlight, the glistening stream ran down her neck and saturated her shirt, making the fabric cling to her-

Anyway…

“Can I… try some?” I requested with a firmly averted gaze and an unfortunately adolescent mind.

Surprised by my request, she looked between me and the abundant beverages around her.

“Are you allowed? I thought you could only have your fancy stuff from the bunker.”

Recalling my rejection of Elmer earlier in the week, I did feel bad about this sudden change of opinion. This was risky too, but at least it wasn’t strange poisonous fruit risky.

“What can I say? Rules are made to be broken.”

Ok, maybe I was showing off a little. Can you blame me?

Shrugging, Canopy carefully snapped off a leaf and carried it down to me, sitting on a branch as I marched up with nothing but reckless male bravado and a touch of anxiety. Taking the leaf from her, I studied the water. It looked fine to me, but brain-eating amoebas weren’t exactly my expertise. Even so, I took a sip.

Holy shit.

Slumping into the branch next to her leg as my mind went blank, I skulled back every drop of the chilled liquid like I’d never had a drink in my life. And let me tell you, I hadn’t.

“See? Your water is nasty, I don’t know how you drink it.” Canopy mused as I dropped the leaf to the ground and caught my breath.

“That’s… the most amazing water… I’ve ever had.” I huffed into the bark, feeling her stroke the back of my head with pity.

“I know, I know. I really am full of surprises- Hey! What are you doing?” She squeaked as I poured out my bottle onto the ground and started scaling the tree. “Be careful, Phylum! Slow down.”

Ignoring her frets behind me, I grabbed another leaf and tried to fill my bottle, accidentally spilling most of it into the brush below. Once it was overflowing with thirst-quenching goodness, I attempted to climb back the way I came, but my foot slipped on the mossy bark.

“Woah!”

My leg falling out from under me, I braced for death, hoping it would be quick, but two hands grabbed my shirt and hoisted me back up.

“You’re fine, you big gorilla. I got you.”

“Thanks, Canopy…” I muttered, redder than I’d like to say.

The earth beneath us swayed back and forth as I tried to get my bearings and continue the climb down. So, seeing my unease, the girl keeping me from falling to my demise showed some mercy and patiently helped me back to safety.

Though, it got me thinking. How would I be able to return home with what I knew now?

~For more, check out our page and follow to buy our book, Status Quo, coming 2025~

[smashwolfen]

Oh it feels good to be brave! Went onto facebook marketplace and built up the nerve to message a seller about their copy of Pokemon Platinum. After scanning and double checking their images they had up beforehand, and then double checking and comparing AGAIN once I had it in hand, I can safely say with 100% certainty that I finally own a legit copy finally! My collection is no longer tainted with counterfeits~!!

Now I fought myself with the pricing (100$ CAN mind you) but it was also the best deal I'd get with the game AND the case (no manuel but no biggie) so Im content with what it was.

The game didnt have much on it, but they don't deserve to get reset, so Im gonna trade them over to my Diamond to give them a home (also the moment I put it in my 3DS, love my modded babeyyyyy)

For those wondering how to tell the difference I can show you in the read more below!

The fake will always be on the left for easy comparisons and to not confuse!

First off the front,

-The saturation alone is an indicator if you have a good eye, the left is very faded, almost a tinge lighter than it should be to the right, and the border for the "Nintendo DS" box isnt very defined.

-The font is not as bolded or clearly visible either, if you have a REALLY hard time reading "CONTENT RATED BY" thats above the "ESRB" text, or if "The Pokemon Company" text is hard to see against the red streak in the background. The fakes text is also oddly spaced apart compared to the real copy, like it got stretched a bit becasue the font is so thin.

-This will be the same with the other examples next, but the little insert arrow on the fake is too clear, its more pressed into the cartidge than it should ever be, the real one is perfectly flat all the way across with thr rest of the cartridges face, only difference is that its smooth to the touch as opposed to the texture of the cartidge. You run your nails across the arrow and you shouldn't feel anything stop you or feel a difference!

Next is the back

-Same as the arrow, it should not be as pressed in to give it a noticable difference in feeling. You rub your fingers across the text you will feel it ever so slightly on a real cartridge, it is more surface area than the arrow, but its nothing that should be of note. The fake will be too pressed in again and you WILL feel it.

-For American, the "NTR 005 PAT. PEND." is on both the fake and real here, most times its not on the fakes but they can be there, just be mindful!

-Some may have been faded overtime, but the black text on the back (for american games, double check your versions region) has a specific code to it. An indicator for being authentic is if the carts have the "CPUE" letters on them on the front and the back, as opposed to the VERY wrong fakes like mine having "CPUE" on the front, but the back has "ADAE" instead XD

Now another indicator may or may not be as viable, but it can be another way to see if its legit or not, it is however NOT a guarentee. Not all carts have these but sometimes at the very top of the cartridge you may see a slight indent (top is fake, bottom is real)

So far with my copies of Diamond, Pearl, Platinum and HeartGold, they all have this little indent. It may not always be there, but it may be slightly more reassurong that it is there if it is XD

Heres hoping its helped those wondering if there game is a fake or not with my own version of discrepancy. If you want more ways or maybe a better explanation of differences, here is a link to a handy guide for all the pokemon games! Same guide i used to tell the difference!

[justajsworkshop]

If you don't mind, what was your journey like with the law?

hm, this is an interesting question because we’re always rewriting the horizontal linear past anytime we remember (i.e., imagine it), so it kinda makes me ask myself: what do i want my journey to have been? so, I might ruminate on that later.

basically, i had a spiritual awakening two years ago and “found god again.” not through religion, more spiritually. i was already in a lot of spiritual work, doing tarot, followed astrologers, all that. but certain branches of christianity really helped fill in the spaces that i was missing from new age spirituality. then i spent six months saying “i just want to know god,” and hilariously enough, through my st.ephen st.range RP blog, i went on this wild tumblr rabbit hole, i learned about the void state. (and this is how i know it’ll manifest for you without trying. could never have planned that but god did.)

in true stephen fashion, i was banging on that door trying tap into the void state, then found out about the law, and did the thing we all usually do. i manifested a bunch of money with sats after finding rita but also found things to be inconsistent. exhausted myself with robotic affirming after finding sammy, which left me saying there had to be an easier way.

found ed art, who opened my eyes to who i am beyond the body, but i got wildly obsessive about my feeling state. got all curious about saturation because of tay, who led me to tiff grande, who mentioned tom in one video, and when i found him, i knew i found my teacher—someone who answered questions i’ve had my entire life in ways i just knew to be true.

i still have my ups and downs to be honest, but this blog has helped me see that im much wiser than i give myself credit for. if there’s anything i am, it’s persistent even if im not consistent, and i think that counts for more in the end. im not giving up on myself; i literally never will now that i know my true self. i have reached a new evolution of releasing so much resistance i felt toward reality recently: judging it and wishing it to be different.

i feel a lot more at peace knowing it’s all mine already, and i can call forth anything with a simple request/affirmation/imaginal scene. and ive def let go of a lot of the “but when is it gonna manifest???” impatience and all that pushing because literally everything that could possibly exist is already mine. so, it’s all manifested here and now. how can there be waiting when it’s all done? i only create the experience of waiting if i perceive reality that way.

now, i just choose what i want as an act of breathing life into adam as god, and let it take form on its own. and when i forget or get caught up in the illusion, i still myself, remember im all things and the kingdom has already been given to me, and i choose my desire again.

[thirtydaysinamonth]

i went to the metro all by myself for the second time. i love being by myself and travelling. i went to a market via metro. for that i needed to switch lines.

but

what i wanted to talk about was the guy i met at the metro. i was riding back home, maybe seven stations to go. by that point id been standing, and losing the empty seat olympics thus far, jostling a bit and trying to steady my feet as a result of the loss.

from the corner of my eye i see a space open up,between two men. i play this game with myself where i challenge myself to sit between two men in the metro. my act of microfeminism to a level id like to call it. i get to manspread, keep a bitch face, and stare back at all the men that stare at me. its the least aggresive thing one can do after being catcalled, gestured the most vulgar things a person can receive while walking on the streets, in my humble opinion.

as i sit down, my knees finally getting rest after having walked around six kilometres, i took out the bottle of water id bought from the streets. i drink the last few sips, and involuntarily make the sounds of my lip smacking followed by an 'aahh'. i smile to myself.

i wouldnt say i was snooping, but the man next to me quite literally had his phone face up, with full brightness, playing a song from an artist i like. he's wearing a shirt and jeans, with the signature bagpack that screams 'i work at another company that has saturated in the IT industry'. he wears frameless glasses, looks to be in his thirties.

i glance over a few times, just to check but also mostly to indicate to the man that i recognise this song. i cant stop smiling. its not often i find a similar taste in music, and even less often on a crowded metro of a city i barely know. id like to believe im a generally sociable person. in the sense that once a day somebdy asks me the direction to a place, instructions to some action. im also never afraid to help them, infact i love it.

i pull out my phone, excited to text my best friend of this news. she urges me to ask the guy and so i do. it goes something liek this

"hey is this xyz artist?"

he painstakingly removes his earphones. i know people get pissed when theyre listening to music and are disturbed. but i didnt care i nthat moment, i felt the need to know and know and know.

"uh, yeah" he gives me a small smile.

"do u usually listen to this genre?"

"yup"

and i know i shouldve backed off there. i nod with a smile and go back to updating my best friend. i tell her how i love people, these mundane things that form daily routines of every person, that makes them so... them. it warms my heart. its the same feeling i feel when i see children, or old people, or friends.

so i open my Spotify and suggest a song to him. he plays it on his phone, bobbing hsibheas up and down. I'm smiling more because I thjnk of how he'd have to pretend to like it even if he doesn't as much. he tells me he likes it and asks for another suggestion. so I put him on another artist.

"what are u doinf currently?"

"I jut graduated school. planning to join college in a month or two. what about u?"

"haha. in just another IT job." he tells me, with this tone of surrender and 'it is what it is". with some sort of uncertain and embarrasing finality in his tone. i see, I tell him.

we go back to listening to our own music. i don't tell him where in from, or where I stay. I know better not to indulge in those details. I don't even know his name and neither does he, mine.

I know I took him by surprise in the beginning. but I think I love tht about people. maybe it's weird or sadistic or creepy. but I love talking to people. I love getting to know someone. mostly. and he seemed harmless enough.

"well, if was nice to meet u!" he tells me before getting off his stop, ten minutes later.

"bye bye, you too!"

sometimes these interactions make my day. I know I initiated contact with this person but every week I get approached by someone or te other. i love seeing people happy. i love seeing people laugh. i think it brings this sort of positivity in my life, that even if I dotn know anything aboutt them, I helped them in this one instant in their lives. maybe theres some sort of selfishness attached to it. but that's okay to me.