#how hard is it to keep stuff private
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Istg theres this comfort character that i have thats just been like ruined in my eyes because of how downright weird the fandom is abt them
#sorry for venting#its juts like#how hard is it to keep stuff private#or tag things correctly#idk i kind of feel like certain ppl have#gotten too comfortable on the internet#nd the things these ppl are#trying to normalize r just....eugh#and they also mischaracterize said character#to a degree where they either make them sound like an obsessive stalker#or like make him completely disregard his beliefs nd work ethic nd all#sorry if i sound like a prude#it just kind of upsets me#anyway rant over sorry for all the tags#on a positive note i might post more pictures of my cat tomorrow :3
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im so fucking tired it's unreal i dont want to Do anything i just want to lie in bed for the rest of my life.
#text#trying not to think about how fucked i am if i fail this semester. w hich is looking likelier and likelier with every missed assignmetn#also apparentlyu my gov professor sent ellen a rly nice email sayinfg that she could tell im trying and that she appreciates that#and she emaield me saying smiliar and. :(((<3 god.#guy who cries really hard when authority figures are kind towards him#i need to just. get stuff done i need to just keep trying#but im so so exhausted#i want to go to sleep but its room check week and idk if my RA is doing room checks Tonight or later this week#i dont want to be in here when they do them bc im anxious#but i dont want to be in public either#and i cant be outaide bc its very cold.#well ig i could but i wouldnt be able to be on my puter bc my fingers would get so cold you understand#i need to find a dark quiet private room to hang out in that isny my room and theres nobody else in there
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Not my older brother introducing me to even MORE genAI bullshit that he got sucked into that draws him away from things he's genuinely super talented at creating himself
#this time it's a music generator called Suno#like. they CLAIM it's not trained on copyright materials but they also refuse to disclose what they train their models ON#not to mention they're WAY too nonchalant about the issue of getting sued by record companies over stolen material#going as far as to talk a lot about how they all went into it knowing the companies could sue#but that still doesn't reveal your training model. reveal the fucking model.#like here's the deal. I hate genAI so much because EVERYTHING folks use are trained entirely on stolen and/or private record shit#if you train your own damn model to replicate your art style? fuck yeah you do you because it's ethically trained#but the shit of scavenging everything it can find off the web is what every single popular generator does and that's why I hate them#unethical. stolen. many times illegal confidental documents.#anyway I had to rant because it's hard to pretend to be nice and encouraging when he shows me this stuff because he ONLY comes to me#and even then he almost never does so I tolerate it for him because I wanna encourage him to keep creating when he does do his own stuff#he's genuinely so fucking talented at making music so this hurts my fucking heart
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Idea first came to me after I said something like "a thousand needles sewing you to a canvas of pain" and so I decided to make it real as best I could.
#does this count as#sculpture#my art#color says shit#Ford's Art#<- figured I needed an actual art tag since I'm actually doing more stuff so that's it I guess.#now I have to go back and edit the tags on all my old art stuff#gonna tag this as#body horror#just in case. some of those threads are actually going through my skin so it's worth tagging.#anyway. I'm finally finished with it! ngl I finished and was like 'what if I don't post it I just keep it privately?'#but I'm continuing my exposure therapy by posting art publicly so here.#anyway. it's no dismembered hand stitched to a canvas but it's the best I could do without going full Hannibal and committing medical crime#I used glue at the start to sew through before giving up and just figuring out how much skin I could get the needle through#I'm gonna feel it tomorrow for sure#do you have any idea how hard this was with just one hand. I had to use my toes as extra fingers to thread the needle every time I ran out#I wanted more tension on the threads but with only one hand and anchors that threatened to rip out I couldn't really#plus the left side was easier to sew because I was using my left hand. the right side was significantly more difficult#as evidenced by the significantly worse stitching on that side#I think I should have stuck with the glue though because it makes the pull marks like I wanted#it makes the thread have more of a meat-hook feel and weight rather than just light thread pulled through stiff skin#I like the left side better than the right. and the upper right is the least convincing
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I keep seeing people say that only the first five tags go into track tags, and fyi itās been way more than the first 5 for a long time now and the oleā #1 #2 #3 #4 #5 thing will still get your thing shoved into the tracked tags.Ā
I think itās something like 20 now? too many to number it out, so I didnāt bother to remember it when the change happened. Annoying for trying to keep your posts lowkey, great for creators.Ā
and if itās not like this and itās just me benefitting from a weird bug, nobody tell staff. I want to keep it.Ā
#i was always more of a fan of absurd personal tags for each thing tho so it doesn't bother me much#though i am finding trek hard with this#idk how to file it all up#i figure tagging stuff voyager is harmless bc the tag surely is filled with tons of random stuff as well and isn't used as the main fandom#tag#but stuff like snw is way more trackable#i picked my own tag for stp but that was bc i rolled my eyes at a trek show named after a character and#was in protest lol#i need to work out a system for things i don't mind showing up everywhere#and ones i Do want to keep private as in#people who follow me see#(and the victims of the fyp algorithm but i can't do anything abt that)
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more vent, continuing from the last 2 posts
#itās just hard going from the highest of highs and then to the lowest of lows#and this whole year so far has been low low low#like I canāt even share or talk about it bc I feel so pathetic and sad about it#but it sucks going from feeling the best Iāve ever felt last yearā¦ to 2023 just being so awful#and itās all my own fault#and any strides Iād made Iām actively erasing and idk how to get out of this mindset#idk how to be happy again#Iām just always feeling so sad#and I feel like Iām projecting this sadness and frustration onto other people#and thatās where the lashing out and accusations come in#but how do I get out of it#and how do I stop worrying bc at this point I think Iām wired this way#but how has it gotten so bad#i work myself up so much over NOTHING#to the point where Iām crying and screaming and hyperventilating#and itās over the smallest most insignificant thing#but I only understand that later in hindsight#Iām not trying to achieve anything by typing all this out#i just wanted to get it written down#and I usually write this sort of stuff in my journal bc I keep this side of myself so private#but (and this is actually funny) I canāt fucking find my journal which sucks bc Iāve been writing in it since I was 16#and I know itās not lost and itās here in my room if I look hard enough but#i just canāt even bring myself to do it#anywyas idek#end of vent
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#ok personal stuff time real quick#so i keep a lot of my internal experiences private online bc Duh but also bc Fear of Bullying#which means i do not often speak of the ways i Come Very Close to kinning certain characters#because like. that word's become so far removed from what it originally was meant for#idk. idk!#there's a lot i could say here about how autism made it hard to see myself in other humans so i've always related more to Creatures#or what even is the difference between identifying with a character's traits and Being Them In Some Way#there's a lot i could wax philosophical about here#but. i guess the point is#every time i see someone with a benr(e)y pfp reblog one of my posts i go 'haha half life funny guy. me. kinda'
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this is hypocritical bc i also do nothing but complain about other people in fandom, but i do feel like fandom is... so much more complaining about other people these days than actually engaging or making things. or at least that's kinda where i've landed myself in a bad little cycle due to other people complaining first lol.
i have always had a sense of emotional paralysis with fanon creation that was able to be remedied by me having more time for it in the past to truly take as much care as possible. and now i really don't have that, be it to make sure i'm doing things in-character or not representing something badly. so i just don't make anything. and idk, i feel like it would be less difficult if there were less pressure from knowing all of these attitudes about what the fandom doesn't like more so than what it does like, since when a fandom DOES like something reblogs and comments are dismal.
a lot of times it's hard to think of things to say that aren't negative, which is why i think those posts happen so much. clearly i do this a lot. sometimes fandoms have more popular opinions on things and it feels inevitable to voice contrary opinions to make sure ur not insane, or idk to feel better at media analysis than the other people. and yeah lol sometimes popular fandom opinions are missing the point or you do not get the popular ship etc. it's good to have those discussions i think when done respectfully to try understanding why people think one thing, or pushing that hey something else also makes sense let's look there, etc, moreso collaboratively.
at the risk of romanticizing earlier fandom days, i guess there is something more general in the backlash now though? i imagine that on sites like livejournal, or i remember on deviantart, criticism was... kind of contained. your art might get one shitty comment or there might be deviantart stamps voicing Hot Takes you could then view the popularity of based on the comments/faves and how many people embedded it on their profiles. but there weren't mass reblogged posts with 120k notes about how boring an AU type is, or how stupid people are for shipping rather than worldbuilding, or how things that are genuinely skill issues more than malice are in fact malice so people aren't even allowed to explore and learn in their inherently amateur creations. it is easier to be hateful when a validated approved post is put on your dash affirming it or influencing that toward people and making it into a bigger deal than it needs to be to justify itself and all you need to do is hit a button to further the train.
like i just think there is such a higher expectation for perfect content tm catering to a mass appeal it would've been harder to measure and conform to before. every time i go on twitter the algorithm just gives me post after post of people going "i can't believe people think this character would do this" or "this headcanon pisses me off so much because___" or "ew how could people ship this?" ...all of which was absolutely present in fandoms before! like, i'm sure anonymous posting in particular saw a lot of these things get traction! but not in such a way where an opinion dragging something you do has 248 retweets putting it on ur feed and insinuating that ur mutuals will judge you next time you post a fic update with that thing. (and then ofc, as i do all the time, seeing people complaining = cue complaining about other people complaining.)
obviously we can just block people we don't like or whatever and it's up to us to not let contrary opinions get to us! i just guess this level of complaining has never before been so widespread and easy because you don't even have to say the thing yourself. you just have to hit reblog or retweet to voice something you otherwise would've kept to yourself with less care. and the numbers feel insane because of how much more popular online fandom is today than even 10 years ago, which... i think has brought on such a loss of etiquette in certain ways when fandom is less interactive and personal for like, tiktokers seeing a 30 second fancam and hitting like if op is lucky and scrolling by. algorithms making more personalized experiences make it so much easier to expect everything to cater to us so it's the end of the world when it doesn't. i could go off on a tangent about anti behavior but i won't. etc.
again i am hypocritical because i complain about other people in fandom endlessly (mostly... because of other people complaining about people like me first) and i am doing that here and i probs have reblogged lots of those things myself lol. obviously there are good convos to be had around how fandoms handle certain things! people are free to do that AND other people are free to post whatever kinds of creations they want AND people can block/mute/whatever any of the above! it's just... although fandom has always had its toxicity i do miss when it felt more fun and carefree and appreciative of imperfect contributions instead of... the balance we currently seem to have in a lot of cases.
it felt like we hit such a shift in ~2015 (anti stuff on the rise, representation convos around lexa dying, etc) that injected the expectations for mass media creators into literally anyone making anything at all for free and for fun. and as much as the ability to reblog/retweet/share around so easily can be beneficial for spreading good and building up fanon creators, i wonder if those critical convos wouldn't have gotten so intense and high-risk for anyone who didn't conform to some frankly impossible standards if it weren't for the intimidation of mutuals contributing to the 13k validating notes on a Hot Take. (and, in terms of anti issues, the ensuing callouts FOR making a mistake could get so much more traction than... telling people to Spread The Targeted Harassment Campaign Word by putting the effort into going and talking about it in their own journal.)
anyway, twitter bad and tumblr tags bad. and i really hope i can get to a point where i am less impeded by this sense of pressure keeping me from making things because it is honestly so hard now to take the limited time i have and pump out something that is either risky or out of character or inevitably imperfect and dare to post it. i am trying to do more with original works because of that, but i still love fandom! so it would be nice to engage with other fans through creating and sharing those joys more these days rather than only having the energy to engage with fandoms by seeing what other people are doing and then seeing these popularized takes and getting even further frozen about contributing lol. people are entitled to their opinions ofc and i need to just stay off twitter keep continually building up my ability to go "yeah that opinion is stupid / even if it's understandably contrary to my preferences i can still do what i want even though it feels more dangerous to know the amount of people who could conceivably ostracize me for it" as the sharing scale of Fandom Takes on too-influencing-friendly platforms continues to rise.
#txt#there is also something about fandom being so personal so there is this angle of...#as usual the things you make reflecting on you in a way that is taken out of proportion by others at times#and i typically talk about that for anti issues but#also i feel less pressure to post things anonymously less because i think some random hate commenter will harass me on tumblr about it#but because i don't want beloved mutuals to think i'm stupid if my characterization is off lol#and the 'he would not fuckign say that' stuff taking off SO HARD for example makes that more of a concern than before etc#like idc if people have different interpretations or ideas as me but it just feels so much risky or so much more...#known in a judgemental way than it needs to be i guess#it's not even that people NEED to keep these things private most of the time#it just all feels TOO public now#anyway idk if im making sense i am v spacy today#and honestly i cite 2015 issues as jumpstarting some of this more but i do remember in like 2014#having a lot of self hatred issues about the quality of what i make keeping me from posting as carefree as i used to#bUT i do think those critical external attitudes becoming more easily widespread compounded my own hesitations horribly#so i wasn't really able to make anything for fandom again until like 2017 when i actually had the time#to put more attention into making sure whatever i made was lower risk#perfect is the enemy of the good but good becomes even more insurmountable in the face of all this lol#and as much as i hate how it's impacted me it's good for me to remember bc i don't want to impact others negatively like this either#i am aiming to be more positive and creation oriented soonnnn i am just taking a bit to get there :')#like it is easy for me to make peace with no one liking a thing i like#but it is harder when it's... actively hateful i guess!#esp when that has such a big impact on the social side of it all ig
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never trust how you feel after 9 pm.
#I really need to stop talking to my parents about my feelings late at night because I just become a sobbing mess and say mean things#like they donāt care about how I feel and telling them to do something impossible like tell me something that even I donāt know what I need#to hear or whatever idk man Iām just feeling too emotional for shit like that#I wish I had a better grasp of my life but I feel so lost and dependent on trivial things which I really shouldnāt be#my mom keeps nagging me about math and I want to get back to it and have. A Plan in place for when I get back to it but I canāt make myself#when theyāre around because I feel self-conscious about it ig?? Like doing math hw is something that needs to be done in private because Iā#embarrassed about it or smth?? Gods thatās embarrassing in and of itself why am I embarrassed to do math in front of my fucking parents#I literally only have geometry left for the initial stuff then I gotta do the actual homework like proctored tests and stuff so why tf is i#so fucking hard to get back to it?? I even enjoy geometry! Why canāt I get back to it?? I feel like a failure for not being able to#Get myself to do something as simple and basic as motherfucking math homework#Idk Iām just feeling really angry at myself about this#dunno what the root emotion is for the anger but itās probably shame or smth#If you made it through all these tagsā¦ good job ig? Donāt feel obligated to cheer me up or anything this is just a rant and vent#But if you do want to do something uhhhh send me a nice message or drawing prompt?? Maybe??#Iām getting into persona (only 3 and 5 so far tho) and kinda want to draw those characters more so those and also obviously#ace attorney and yugioh and kh and Mario rpgs and really anything Iāve talked about recently#vent
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Cute art/Fandom blogs im sorry for running a dark evil cringe sad aesthetic/vent blog and showing up in your notes I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorryyyyy
#paci.txt#my toxic trait is loving the cutest sweetest things and having the most desolate su1cidal thoughts ever all at once#like im SORRYYYYYY CUTE MY L1TTL3 P0NY BLOG IM NOT TRYING TO RUIN YOUR DAY JUST TAKE THE LIKE AND DONT LOOK IN HERE PLEASSEEEEE#i love your cute horses that bring me back to childhood happiness and peace but do noottttt look at who is looking at it#this is turning into one of those 'i feel like a happiness void no matter how hard i try to be nice and keep this stuff private irl' posts#my bad gonna stop explode scream crying in the tags like a baby bitch im cool#but to be clear this post isnt about anyone specific i follow its just. the feeling yk
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Sex Ed Time
ok I'm gonna tell you about some things that might happen if you are transitioning m->f. this is not a comprehensive list just my own experience, be sure to do your own research I just really wanted to voice how this affects me because I think open discussion about this type of stuff is just more helpful for everyone rather than keeping it private
BOOBS HURT WHEN THEY GROW
your sex drive (libido) will probably go down a lot
facial hair is very hard to get rid of
my go-to gender affirming clothing is high-waisted jeans. I suggest going to a goodwill or some sort of cheap store that lets you try on clothes to figure out what you like
muscle mass will go down, fat will be redistributed
boobs do all sorts of crazy stuff when you run / exercise
overtime your skin will get softer, you also might smell nicer, and I've been told it can thin body hair but I don't really see it all that much š¤·
your brain chemistry can change when you reduce testosterone and increase estrogen, there are lots of factors that contribute toward any changes to your personality, but hormones can have an impact as well. for me this is a good thing because I struggle with allowing myself to feel emotions sometimes, no matter how hard I tried I was never really able to get myself to cry. I've gotten closer to being able to cry since I started transitioning though and that makes me very happy
this is a slow process that can take several years, ultimately you're going to be in your body for several years regardless, so if this is something you want it's definitely something you should try to pursue if possible. the time will pass anyways, and it does feel nice to work towards something that can make you happier.
also this is very important, you don't need to do any sort of hormone replacement therapy in order to be trans. not everybody can access HRT, and for those who can access it, not everybody wants to take on all the changes that come with treatments. you don't have to chemically or physically change your body in any way in order to deserve respect
all right that's all I have for right now feel free to add anything in the comments, I would especially like to hear from trans men what your experiences have been, I think openly talking about these types of things can really help some people
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OK. OKAY. YOU GUYS.
I am LOVING the fucking chocolate guyās netflix show! Itās FANTASTIC! Anf hold on to your fucking boots yāall cause itās actually not what I was expecting at all!
Do you miss the gentleness of the Great British Bake-Off? THIS SHOW IS SO KIND AND GENTLE! For fuckās sake, NO ONE GETS KICKED OFF! No. No, Listen to this! When they lose the first challenge (a pastry one), the punishment is... They get private lessons with Amaury to help improve what brought their scores down instead of competing in the second chocolate challenge.Ā
When the one black lady contestant messed up the first challenge I was super bummed and like, OF COURSE. But NO. She got lessons! She struggled! she worked hard! and she won a later challenge! GROWTH MY DUDES! They are there TO LEARN and GROW and Maybe Win a Big Prize!
They ALL get to stay and keep doing their best! and at the end the one who did the best overall is the one who gets the money prize!
Look at this lovely line up! they make COOL LOOKING FANCY THINGS! Amaury tells us how he does some of the fancy things he does! They OFFER TO HELP EACH OTHER WHEN THEY FINISH EARLY AND GET PROPS FOR THAT! (not taunted for not using their own time better). The set up even kinda makes the one who is like, Iām in it to win it, is the villain and doing bad. The rest who are like, Iām here to learn and grow and maybe make friends! AUGH YOU GUYS!
Amaury is soft spoken and kind, and has a pretty voice and a pretty smile and thatās nice to watch too. The chefs are talented and artistic and they actually give the THE TIME to make nice things! Itās not āWham out some half-assed garbage in 2 hours so we can shotgun the production and laugh at your garbageā like most cooking shows nowadays. NO! 14 hour challenges! Theyāre still hard, but they get to actually make cool stuff! fancy stuff! Stuff I want to look at and cheer for them!
The episodes average 38 min and arenāt a huge time commitment, the first episode being the longest one, and there are only 8 total so itās not like you have to really get in for the long haul. \
WATCH IT! Pump it! we need more cooking shows like this and less that are sad and mean!
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your purity is precious ! charlie mayhew.
father charlie mayhew who just canāt keep his filthy hands off you during private bible study lessons.
youāre sat on his lap. you two are just that close, thereās nothing abnormal about this. āfather, youāyou know a lot about this stuff,ā you say, his fingers trailing toward your poor cunt, all wet and puffy under your panties. practically begging to be touched. āy-youāre very smart, father.ā just give in, whatās so hard about it?
but you canāt.
his other one squeezes and kneads your soft, shapely breasts, fitting ever so perfectly in his rough and calloused hand. āyou know,ā he sighs in your ear, bulge pushing up against your plush ass, āyour father never mentioned how beautiful you were, did he?ā you hesitantly shake your head as he hooks his finger onto your panties and pulls them to the side.Ā
your lips part with a soft gasp as he drags his finger up your warmth, slickness spreading across your delicate parts.Ā
he leaned in closer, lowering his voice even more. āhave you given your innocence away yet?ā his breath was hot on your ear, sending shivers down your spine.Ā
the question catches you off guard, of course, you havenāt, thatād be disgusting. no man would ever look atālet alone marry a woman without her virginity, especially in your town.
āno, father, iāiām waiting until marriage. iām still pure,ā you whisper.
he groans and softly pushes up against your ass. so pure, you are. you follow the word.
youāre clean.
āgood girl, keep it that way. your purity is precious. remember that.ā he says in your ear, breath still warm against your skin, making you softly grind down on his fingers.Ā
āi will,ā you repeat in your head, that saying. my purity is precious, my purity is precious, my purity is precious.
his thick middle finger circles your tight hole before slipping in slowly, you wince and bite your full lip, stifling a loud cry. he grins sadistically. a small amount of blood coats his finger, he runs his tongue over his lip in response.Ā
āand you havenāt,ā he pushes his finger in more, focusing on that spongy spot within, ātouched yourself?ā he felt a stirring in his pants, his thick cock straining against his slacks, begging to be let out.
you tell him you havenāt; itās mostly true. though one time you got a bit carried away with your pillow.
his grin widened mischievously. "you mean to tell me that beautiful, untouched body of yours is... a virgin in every sense?" his hand on your breast slowly started to caress it again, his touch gentle yet soā¦ perverse.
itās like he was hungry.
āyes, f-father.ā your legs trembled slightly as he dug deep inside of your warm, inviting hole, so soft and tight. the priests' voice grew husky as he spoke, "you know, my child... when i was your age, i couldn't keep my hands off myself. i'd touch myself every chance i got, in the shower, under the desk at school... sometimes even at church."
he speaks as if he doesnāt still touch himself every single night.Ā
his finger curls inside you, and an involuntary whine escapes your lips. your clit felt all fuzzy, and your tummy tightened as you slowly began to move your hips back and forth on his finger, blood prickling on your lip from the pressure of your teeth.
āthatās it. riiight there, take it all, my child. make yourself feel good,ā his voice completely shifted, so smooth and still so low.Ā
he pulled out of you quickly, bringing his sticky fingers to his mouth and sucking them disgustingly. his eyes rolled back while he did, and you felt his fat cock throb through his pants as he tasted your sweet nectar, with a hint of a metallic taste. your virgin blood.
his focus slowly turned back to you, and he slipped his finger back in without a word, just groans and sighs filling the room. āmy child, youāyou areā¦ the most precious thing,ā your cunt tightens around his finger, telling him you were inching closer to release.
the feeling in your puffy, red clit was so overwhelming, heat reaching every part of your body in a matter of seconds. another hand comes and touches it, rubbing and pushing down on it as tears begin brimming your eyes while you cry loudly, legs shaking uncontrollably at this point.Ā
your vision began to blur as you felt your tummy release the knot itād been tightening since heād started touching you. āoh, father! i canātāiā¦ā you went numb completely, thrashing as your sticky juices flowed out of your, now, used hole. your moans were obnoxiously loud, youād let go all over your poor priest.
he didnāt stop there though, rubbing and bucking his hips against your soft ass until he gets what heās been wanting for ages. he pushes his hips up against you one more time before whimpering softly and groaning, breathing warmly against you.Ā
you both sat there for a minute, dazed and coming to your senses before he urged you to make yourself decent and ushered you out of his room, leaving you with familiar words.Ā
āyour purity is so precious, my child.ā
#charlie mayhew#father charlie mayhew#father charlie x reader#father charlie smut#father charlie grotesquerie#grotesquerie#charlie mayhew smut#charlie mayhew x reader#father mayhew#father charlie mayhew x reader#father charlie#nicholas alexander chavez#x reader#smut#nicholas chavez#lana del rey#fem reader#kinktober#female reader#diorchids#writing#grotesquerie smut#grotesquerie fx#lois tryon#micaela diamond#sister megan duval#relatable#he is so fucking hot#needthat
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I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU, AND ALL THESE LITTLE THINGS ā¢ā¦ haikyuu
KUROO, KENMA, IWAIZUMI, OIKAWA, AKAASHI, KITA, ATSUMU, OSAMU and the little things that matter the greatest when you're with them
ā” NOTE ā® single as a pringle but I want my future relationship to be like this ą«®ź°ć£Ėā¹Ģ„Ģ„Ģ„ ź± these boys make me fall in love hard
KUROO TETSUROU
It's the way he always stays beside you even though you're both doing different things. He'll rest his head against your arm as you type on your laptop/computer and he was on his phone, browsing for some random meme or nerd stuff. From time to time, Tetsu will show you some funny posts he'll come across just so you can laugh at it together. When he feels the urge, he'll plant a random kiss on your shoulder; and if he still can't get enough, he'll steal a kiss on your lips and who knows it might turn into something more. There are times when he's feeling extra so cuddly and will rub his cheek against your arm like he's your cat in human form, then he'll feel drowsy and fall asleep.
It can go the other way around too when you're caged in his arms with your attention on your phone and his on the TV. He'll nuzzle his nose on top of your head and you'll squeeze tight against his chest, just shrouded with his warmth and scent.
He doesn't have the perfect family growing up. He's awakened to the the impermanence of things a little too early that's why just by having you beside him is more than enough. Just the simplicity of basking in each other's presenceācherishing all the time you get to spend with each other no matter how mundane.
KENMA KOZUME
It's when he treasures every memory with you no matter how small. Kenma will sneakily take pictures of you whenever you're just simply eating fries, you're busy doing work, or crying over a tearjerking scene in a movie. That one time you looked so beautiful as you attend a party with him, the one when you are slightly snoring in your sleep and even when you have your mouth full as you munch on your favorite food, he has an album of all those. He has even created a private Instagram account with photos and videos of you alone and of the two of you as a couple.
Sometimes you will catch him smiling while tinkering on his phone and you just think he's playing a game, but little did you know that he is editing a video of you and the both of you.
He has been content being all by himself yet when you've come along, his world begins to be more colorful. It's like he's playing Pokemon but the one he's catching will always be you and your cute reactions, keeping every bits and pieces of your presence in his life as the greatest gameplay he doesn't want to be over.
IWAIZUMI HAJIME
It's how he wakes you up each morning. Hajime is always the early riser. Set aside the times when he'll surprise you with a breakfast in bed or the instances when you're running late, he'll nag at you so you can get your lazy ass up from bed.
What you treasure the most is whenever you find your head resting against his chest as he fidgets with the strands of your hair. The beating of his heart against your ear is like a sweet welcome in the morning.
Also, the times when you'll wake up to him watching you sleep. His gaze is full of adoration and filled with emotions unspoken. The way his eyes will crinkle in his smile as he say, "Good morning." You feel so lucky to wake up beside this man. Just seeing him you look at you like that makes you grateful of each waking day, getting another chance to spend it with him. You want to freeze the moment, wishing for it not to end anytime soon. Just you and him before the world.
OIKAWA TOORU
It's the pillowtalk you have before going to sleep. How you reminisce the first time you meet each other and how far you've come together. The sparkle in his eyes as he recall how much more beautiful you have become and stronger you have been, growing into the wondeful person you are today. His eyes convey so much fondness and love that they beam even at the dimness of your room. There's also something so special with the way he caresses the side of your facewith the backnof his hand as if he's trying to bury each dip and line of your feature.
You'll dissect your emotions together, the good and the bad. You'll both cry at the sad moments, embrace each other through the hurt and laugh at the silliest and most embarassing memories.
Tooru has always been seeking for external validation, seeing achievement as the metric for his success yet with you it's just so simple. You're all he needs to be fulfilled. With you, it's just so easy. and sharing every moment with you, every loss, every victory, is something he will never ever trade for anything else. For, despite everything, he has finally found the safe space he can come home to at the ebd of each day.
AKAASHI KEIJI
It's when he doesn't want to let go of your hand. Keiji has always been a gentleman, but he won't let anyone break your handhold whenever you stroll outside. He'll always have your hand in his never breaking away. His hold is tight and gentle, expressing how protective he is of you. His thumb usually carresses the back of your knuckles so sweetly and he'll occasionally whisper a kiss like you're his treasured princess. When it's cold, he'll slip your linked fingers inside his coat. Sometimes, he'll gently breathe out against your hand if he notices you freezing. Whenever your handhold will break, he immediately seeks out for you. He'll stop walking just so you can come back in his grasp again.
He has gained a habit of playing with your dainty fingers idly too. Sometimes, it can catch people's attention just by the sheer intimacy of it yet he isn't aware.
Even when you're alone and at home, he still reaches out for your hand. He has you in a tender hold as you watch your favorite show or eat dinner. There are times you'll wake up with your fingers interlocked with each other and it gives you so much comfort. Comfort in knowing you have someone to hold on to for the rest of your life and you know you'll never ever let him go too.
KITA SHINSUKE
It's the way he cares for you like no one else does. Shinsuke will always see that you have eaten enough and at the right time. You can't skip a meal when he's around. If you're busy and can't take a meal right away, he'll bring the food to you. Makes sure that you drink plenty of water and you sleep on time. He snatches your phone away when you take too much time with it even during late at night. When he's farming and you're at work, he takes time to call you during lunch, making sure that you are looking after yourself as much as he's looking after you.
He always checks the temperature outside and prepares the right outerwear for you so you won't catch a cold. Even if you have layers and layers of clothing over you, he'll still pull you close with an arm around your shoulder to keep you warm.
When it's raining, his priority is to get you under the umbrella. It doesn't matter if a part of himself is getting drenched as long as you are not.
He can be strict at times but he is easy to cave in and will allow you to eat your favorite junk food or sweet once you surprise him with a kiss.
Though he can be quite strict at times, he really wish you know how much you mean to him he doesn't want you to be harmed. Your hurt is his hurt and he just simply wants you to take care of yourself the way he cares so devotedly for you.
MIYA ATSUMU
It's because you're his perfect match. Tsumu often buys something in pair. People will see you wearing matching jackets, shirts and caps. You even have couple phone cases and wallpapers because of him. Whenever he has a new jersey, he'll give the extra to you so you can sometimes wear it together. He just loves seeing his clothes on you. You look so good in them that
Whenever he buys something in the grocery, he'll also buy one for you. If there's only ine pudding left, he'll share the other half of it with you. Always with you. He always has you in his mind and thinks of you as he thinks of himself.
Sometimes, he'll sacrifice what he has just so you can have it. He won't let you know about this, of course, but he wants you to feel that you have him as a partner, that he'll be with you in every step of the way and that he sees you as an extension of himself.
MIYA OSAMU
It's because he lets you mess up. Though it's obvious with the way he sweats and brows furrow, how he's so nervous with what the outcome could be, Samu will still let you take over his kitchen.
Normally, he doesn't allow any foreign hands on any of his kitchenware, but you are the only exception.
He'll let you use his non-stick skillet pan though he just bought it. He knows it won't come unscathed after your use but he still lends it to you and you know it so well. Instead of getting angry at you, he just laughs at your mistakes, carressing the top of your head and giving you a sweet kiss. He's aware that you're trying your best to impress him even if he is constantly reminding you that he doesn't mind making breakfast, lunch and dinner for you for the rest of your life.
Most importantly, you can mess up his brand new skillet or even his whole kitchen. He can always get another one again but he cannot get another one of you.
@pixelcafe-network
#kuroo x reader#kenma x reader#iwaizumi x reader#oikawa x reader#akaashi x reader#kita x reader#atsumu x reader#osamu x reader#kuroo headcanons#kenma headcanons#iwaizumi headcanons#oikawa headcanons#akaashi headcanons#kita headcanons#atsumu headcanons#osamu headcanons#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu headcanons#hq x reader#hq headcanons#kuroo fluff#kenma fluff#oikawa fluff#iwaizumi fluff#akaashi fluff#kita fluff#atsumu fluff#osamu fluff
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Spice up your life, come get a freak! ā¹ ą£Ŗ Ė
warnings (18+): MDNI. explicit sexual content, sexual fantasies (riding, doggy style, cock warming, masturbation (m), grinding), boss x worker, blowjob, strong language, mature themes, etc.
characters: SUGURU, TOJI, KENTO, SUKUNA, WRIOTHESLEY, AL HAITHAM, CAPITANO, DOTTORE, ( your choice )
Your boss who always frown and only smillin or nodding when itās necessaryāusually only for the higher-ups and stuff
Heās grumpy and quick to scold anyone who slips up or doesnāt meet his expectations.
But you? youāre different..
You do every instructions given to you, sometimes even going above and beyond...
like...
"Should've expected that you'd be good at everything."
He says, smirking as he watches you work your pretty lips around his thick cock. His hand tugs at your hair, guiding you as he groans, feeling the heat of your mouth.
The way you looked up at him with those eyes that were half-lidded and full of desire.. it just makes him feel excited.
Itās funny how he imagined (quite a lot) bending you over his desk with that tight pencil skirt of yours barely keeping your curves as he takes you from behind.
He knows it well that itās not just him whoās thought about it.
I mean who would NOT think about it?
You literally would always show up at the office looking so hot with those files on your left arm, your makeup that would often match your clothes of long sleeve tops and that pencil skirts of yours thatāhe can't stop beating his shit toājust look too perfect for you.
It's like youāve got a whole wardrobe full of those skirts... not like he's complaning tho...
And those stockings of yours..? DAMN.
They make you look even sexier, hell it would always be having people turn their heads everytime you walk by.
Itās utterly hard for him to ignore the way that bulge in his pants grows whenever youāre near.
Especially when you would bend over to pick up those papers you accidentally droppedāthe papers he made fall on purpose just to get a better view of that fucking hips of yours.
Surely the other guys in the office had once imagine you on your knees under their desks.. relieving their stress while pretending to focus on their work.
Maybe it's not just him who has fantasies about you riding their cock.. your body trembling with every movement as you grind down on it.
They would always imagine you trying to stay still while heās buried deep inside feeling you clench around him in the process...
Heād slap that perfect ass of yours if you move too much.
In public, you may look like the epitome of innocence... but there's a side in you that nobody ever saw.
Everyone may think you're that cutesy, sweet, and demure female..
but in private? you're anything but that.
Youāre good at keeping that face while being a total freak in the sheets, and thatās what really drives him fucking crazy.
Oh, he was sure you're the spice he needed.
Ā© [ adorekento ] do not steal, repost, or translate my work.
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#geto suguru#geto smut#suguru smut#suguru x reader#geto x reader#toji smut#toji x reader#kento nanami#kento smut#nanami smut#kento x reader#nanami x reader#sukuna smut#sukuna x reader#sukuna ryomen#wriothesley#wriothesely smut#al haitham smut#al haitham x reader#genshin impact#wriothesley x reader#capitano#capitano x reader#capitano smut#dottore#dottore smut
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Astro Notes : Short N Sweet - The power lilith holds <3
Lilith in the 1st - Very strong personalities. Gifted in using the eyes to seduce others. Magnetic. Can fight the demons off of you so please be weary of getting to close if you don't want them to see what hides beneath the surface. There angelic, believe it or not. They're not here to see the world as you see it, they have a taboo personality, yes, but its also because they must learn how to live for themselves and not for anyone else.
Lilith in the 2nd - Cash cow. Can basically get any man to give them what they want. They have to be comfortable in getting under peoples skin, because they can trigger people with how they talk. Insensitive? Not exactly. Just doesn't budge and cares to be 'nice'.
Lilith in the 3rd - Creative freaks. Can use the mind in a million ways, but they still seek out one thing that works for them as they are very passionate people and whatever keeps their attention the most they'll go at it forever. They are use to the attention from people since primary school. So they like to hide a lot. They have a weird mind and they don't care to share it with too many people. If they ever considered writing, they could make some pretty interesting stuff. Sibling rivalries are a thing here.
Lilith in the 4th - Tumulous relationships with family & friends. It's because they're the outcast of the group. I mean, they know a lot and they can't stand for nothing but the truth. But sometimes the truth kills, even when they don't mean for it to be. Can be a hard knock life but they make it worth something. They're no angel, just the universe in the flesh. <3
Lilith in the 5th - Captivating presence. Lovely auras, and amazing bodies. Could be good at dancing. Could be a lil promiscuous. Could be a little dangerous. You never know. Secretive/private about their affairs.. But the stories they have I promise you its like reading a novel. Naturally sensual & can't get enough of them, even if you tried ;)
Lilith in the 6th - Goes hard for groups that aren't seen enough. Can have jealous coworkers or people who want to annoy them and get them out of character. Could also have sensual experiences with co workers. Demands compensation. Could be extremely well liked or hated no in between.
Lilith in the 7th - Spicy individuals. People love to hate them. Could have bisexual allegations from time to time. Most people like to be around them but despise them after a while. Sweet as a pie though, most people allow the rumors to get to them but usually these people are naturally sweet and empathetic. Popular loners.
Lilith in the 8th - Strong personalities. Capable of seeing beyond the veil. Has issues with society due to their daring nature but they do come out ready and swinging. Hypnotic presence. Can heal as much as they can poison, so be careful wit em ;)
Lilith in the 9th - Very beautiful spirits who are the epitome of being carefree. The universe takes them wherever their hearts want to go, and the journey is always something that last a life time. Being connected to someone with this placement could give you the feelings of something amazing. Always hold their hand tight because once their gone its over.
Lilith in the 10th - Dreamy auras. Have a knack for the public and the audience can feel their raw energy. Have haters from all area codes, this just makes them more confident. They know how to appease society well, and they can take on roles that others are too afraid to. This is great placement for lilith to be in.
Lilith in the 11th - Could had to fight to keep their self esteem in check. Due to being outcasted alot, they could of been the scapegoat for a lot of reasons that didn't pertain to them much. With time, they learn to accept that their energy isn't for anyone, and that their value is more than what you can define it. Helpful sweethearts who just wants to be around community that gets them.
Lilith in the 12th - The dream world is a nightmare. My apologies to y'all cause I'm suppose to start it off a little sweet. But this is placement of a witch/warlock. You guys have many gifts that go past the ordinary. And you more than likely come up with some ish down the line. There is a time where you will undergo a lot of spiritual refinement to keep your head going. Don't be afraid of what shows up, it might teach you something!
#im so sorry to lilith in the 12th#astrology thoughts#astrology theories#thoughts#love#astrology#astrology observations#tropical astrology#astro observations#spirituality#astro knowledge#short n sweet
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