#how did the episode start with “tell me if you see any good cows’ and end with all the fears on our plane of existence
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I just finished the Magnus Archives season 4 and holy fuck. It was all so calculated. I thought that the last episode would be JMart peacefully existing and taking a moment to collect themselves after everything, then go back to the Archive and solving problems together with the people they care about.
Then Elias comes in with an exact statement about how he made John bring about the fucking apocalypse and exactly how the powers and rituals work. He forced John to bring it about and now it is all over. I don’t know if anyone is going to survive. I just want them to be happy.
#i’m terrified#how did the episode start with “tell me if you see any good cows’ and end with all the fears on our plane of existence#fuck you elias I liked you#still do tbh#justiceforgertrude
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Can’t even lie man I’ve been offline all day and i immediately went to your blog to read your takes on the session and Pearl n gem n co. after watching some wild life. Thanks for having the best takes lol
genuinely, it’s an honour. crazy to me that anyone would come to this blog for good takes, they never make any sense and i’m always suspiciously resentful towards c!scott. i’ll take this opportunity to lay out my gempearl thoughts as well
first of all, it drives me insane the way pearl usually goes along with whatever scott and cleo says, but the only thing she consistently, and has repeatedly, contradicted them on is that she’s been antagonising gem. in fact at the start of the session scott poked her about it again and she laid out a short monologue to assert that his claims were invalid. funnily enough she goes back on this a few seconds later saying that “i’ll make her have a reason to hold that grudge” which honestly is not helping her case. however if gem can make vague threats about impulse i don’t see why pearl can’t do the same. women’s wrongs and all that.
and then after that scott tells impulse and pearl to apologise to gem and joel. again, it’s a bit odd to me how they keep harping on this bit, but every time they do, all they do is scold impulse for rightfully constantly accusing gem over the cows, and then impulse apologises, yet pearl is still implicated (for NOTHING). pearl did protest this point earlier that she was “just existing”, scott counters that “i don’t know what you’ve done but you’ve annoyed her”, so “keep your distance”.
and to think that the argument only happened because scott made a throwaway comment about a “request” he had for pearl if she wanted a life from him. i feel like he meant it as a funny aside and expected pearl to just shut up and take it, but pearl never shuts up and takes it so that’s the problem there.
also, on secret life: pearl argues that she was right to ally with scar, which like, okay, fair enough, but scott says that “it takes time” and that “look we’re together” i’m not sure why he’s under the perception that GGG is in anyway functional or healthy considering he himself is trashtalking impulse and pearl with gem geminitay (ok sorry i’m just salty over him being buddy buddy with gem). at one point cleo goes “we have to be enablers” (lowkey incorrect because pearl hasn’t done anything, you can’t enable someone to just do nothing, but i appreciate the sentiment) and pearl just starts. throwing eggs at the ground. really funny out of context.
now for the actual gempearl interaction (we get like one and a half per episode i’m actually starving). they’re so obsessed with each other. trust me i said so. pearl beelining to gem to say “hi gem! :D” and gem beelining to pearl to punch her and say “go home pearl” oh they make me ill i feel like they’re just constantly on each other’s minds. the problem is that we haven’t gotten a good gempearl interaction because when they’re near each other their allies are also hanging around, so it always ends up with gem getting glazed by scott or pearl getting distracted by bigb or something like that. it’s such a pity because gem specifically went to find the 4Gs’ base but she went to the old one instead of the new one where pearl was hanging around so we could have potentially gotten a 1 on 1 shiny duo interaction this session (i’m not sure about the timeline there) but we DIDN’T because gem’s not talked to the 4Gs enough to know that they moved bases. grrr.
and then gem drops the anger for a bit to encourage pearl to kill grian. i have NO idea what that’s about, i feel like she’s just into bloodthirst in general but what it does remind me of is her trying to convince pearl to kill the ender dragon in SL, coincidentally, when pearl was impulse’s butler. and now she’s encouraging pearl to carry out what impulse wants. i don’t know. maybe her type is murderers and she’s trying to give pearl a chance. or something
anyway as for the other half an interaction where gem finds etho pearl and cleo at her base, gem reverts back to loudly disparaging pearl within earshot. i feel like she’s nailed “ex who really wants you to know that you’re exes”, and pearl getting so indignant about it she can’t even form a sentence for a few seconds is great actually. might be a reach but whether on hermitcraft or life series, pearl tends to stumble over her words a lot when directly challenged by gem, which is probably just because she’s thinking hard on what to say and is sleep deprived half the time. but i find it pretty telling that pearl doesn’t say anything back to gem and just. leaves. it’s very obvious she’s still down bad for gem in a way but gem is intentionally making it very hard for pearl to remain so.
last paragraph. when joel visits pearl at their new base, joel is happy that pearl called his build a car and said she liked it (pearl likes cars fork found in kitchen). so joel and pearl are on good terms, which i expect would lead to interesting dynamics but at the same time joel would definitely follow gem’s lead over maintain that friendship but still his perception of pearl now is positive. so that’s intriguing
song of the day is down bad by taylor swift. trust me guys they want each other so bad
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The Magnus Archives S4 Finale
I have waited so long (well, a week) to do this one. I'm so excited. and horrified
okay so Martin is in the Lonely and Jon followed him
hhhhhhh
kinda interesting that last season's finale took place in the spiral and this one in the the lonely
peter lukas dont you dare
"He doesn't want to see you." "Then let me hear that from him." "Just go." "Make me." i love you jon
what do you mean Martin
"nothing hurts here" asdfjasffjrfj
jhelp will it be like this the entire time??? gay angst???
"Tell me your story Peter Lukas." never I thought those words could sound so threatening
okay i hate Peter but his story is really sad?
his ritual is insane wtf
what. what was that. did the Eye do something
"We need you. I need you." I CANT DO THIS-
OMG WHAT WAS THAT EPISODE
FIIIINAAALEEE
okay where are we now
"Don't tell me the phone box down there doesn't appeal to you retro aesthetic." hhhhhhhh I love theeeeemmmm
"Same as last week" how long have they been there?
"Let me know if you see any good cows." "Obviously I'm going to tell you if I see any good cows." erfrfherufhqweufherfuh
hello jon. apologies for the deception but i wanted to make sure you started reading
omg statement of Jonah Magnus
Sorry I'm not commenting I'm so entranced in the statement and the fire and rain sounds they knew what they were doing with those
ALL THE POWERS AT ONCE!?
what.the.fuck
you should've seen my face
nononnonononononnooooo
shiiiiiiit
oh my god it's the apocalypse
"look at the sky. it's looking back." WHAT
I actually can't-
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DON'T LOOK DOWN -> the last of us
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hi...so I'm absolutely losing my mind over this show. I have some friends who have played the game that are head over heels for it as well, but as someone who's never played, I'm SOLD. I'm in love with the world, with the characters, with the set design, EVERYTHING. Ever since I saw episode one I've had an idea rattling around in my head for an OC, so I did what I always do — come to Tumblr to flesh them out! I hope you enjoy this and please let me know if you do through comments or reblogs!! Remember that if you like a fic or any post for that matter, you should like and REBLOG it, because likes mean next to nothing. Support your fellow artists and spread the love!! Enjoy, my lovely readers <3
PAIRING: PLATONIC joel miller x fem!reader (I'm talking some SERIOUS found family stuff here) WARNINGS: Heavy use of guns and weapons, mentions of the apocalypse, DETAILED descriptions of violence, trauma, and death. Family member death. I definitely sobbed while writing this SUMMARY: After losing her family and getting found by the Fireflies, Y/n goes with Ellie and Joel on a treacherous journey to Salt Lake City.
"I spy with my little eye...something blue."
"Is it the sky?"
"No, dipshit, that's too obvious." Ellie said with an eye roll.
Y/n just scoffed, shaking her head. "Joel, you got any ideas?"
"How 'bout we start with making this the last round of this game?" he said gruffly. Ellie just gave him a glare and muttered something about him being a killjoy underneath her breath. Joel cleared his throat, looking around them — the open field to the left, the forest to the right. "You got me."
Ellie groaned, her head dropping. "It was Y/n's backpack, duh." she said. "Which, I'd like to add, has two guns in it. Not one. Two."
"Cause I actually know how to use them, genius." Y/n replied. "I'm kind of shit at aiming, but I can't point and shoot until the cows come home. If there's one good thing about the apocalypse, it's that it taught me some basic life skills really damn fast.
"Aren't you from Arizona? Hunting season's pretty much year-round down there. Didn't your dad take you out hunting or something?" Joel asked.
At those words, something in Y/n's eyes glazed over. "No. No he didn't." she said, her voice flat. After a moment, she sniffed and rubbed at her nose, turning her head away so as not to let them notice. But Joel saw. She coughed. "Come on, we should pick up the pace if we want to make it to Bill's by sundown."
With that, she sped up until she was walking a good ten feet in front of them. Joel watched her with confusion, which Ellie noted.
"She does that when she doesn't want anyone to see her cry," she explained quietly. "She's got some rough family stories."
"We all do." Joel replied.
But Ellie just shook her head, glancing back at Y/n. "Not like hers."
Ellie and Y/n huddled behind the hole in the wall, listening to the sounds of gunfire come and go. Pop, pop. Silence. Pop. Y/n could barely stand it. She flinched at the familiar sound of gunfire now.
Y/n popped out above from hers and Ellie's hideout and fired a few times into the open, not sticking around to see if she'd actually hit one of their attackers. She always figured it was better if she didn't know. Based on the number of shots coming from their end, she could tell that Joel was wildly outnumbered. They weren't FEDRA or Fireflies, but they had a big enough group to overwhelm one man. Glass shattered as a bullet from the other side shattered through the truck's windshield. Y/n peeked out as glass rained down on Joel. He was alone as the enemy approached. And Y/n couldn't let that happen.
Joel carefully made his way to the other side of the truck as someone stepped in through the obliterated doorway of the laundromat. Glass crunched under his feet. Every step he took brought him closer and closer to discovering Joel. They were running out of time.
Y/n turned to Ellie suddenly, startling her. She put her hands on either sides of Ellie's face, looking at her with an expression so serious that she knew it was in her own best interest to shut the hell up. "Listen to me, you need to stay here. Don't get up. Don't move. Don't even think about it. Don't get a bright idea and try to play hero, alright?"
Ellie gave a quick nod and Y/n stooped down, unzipping her backpack as quietly as she could and pulling out one of her pistols. She began to creep to the hole in the wall, but Ellie grabbed her sleeve before she could come into view. "What are you doing?"
Y/n turned back, trying not to let the fear coursing through her show to the younger girl. "I got a bright idea."
Y/n crept carefully through the hole in the wall as the man stepped closer towards Joel's hiding place. She held her breath, both hands wrapped around the pistol, her pointer finger on the trigger.
Crunch.
The man wheeled around, and Y/n, caught off-guard, abandoned the gun, placing a strong kick to the man's stomach. He stumbled back and the gunfire resumed, stronger now than ever. Joel used this moment to leap out of his hiding spot, jamming the butt of his rifle into the back of the man's head. He crumpled on the spot, blood pouring from the point of impact.
"I told you to stay there." Joel said angrily.
"I don't listen." Y/n said. A single gunshot whizzed past them and they crouched down to avoid it.
"If you go leaping into open fire, what's to stop Ellie from doing the same, huh?"
"She wouldn't follow me out here."
"How do you know?"
"Because I told her not to."
"I told you not to. And you didn't listen." Joel said, reaching up to fire. There was a yell as his bullet met its target, and the gunfire ceased instantly. He went to reload, but found the barrel had jammed.
Y/n stood up, glaring at Joel. "She listens to me. She trusts me." she said. "You're just the guy in charge of taking us from Point A to Point B."
"Trust isn't the point here, okay?" Joel replied, standing. "You're not setting a good example for her."
"You're not my dad, Joel!" Y/n replied, her tone low and harsh. "Ellie is the closest thing I've got to family. Once we reach Salt Lake City, I'm going to be the only one she has, and I'll be damned if I take that away from her. I can protect myself. So worry about yourself."
Joel had no answer for that. Suddenly the silence they were surrounded by seemed impossibly loud. Either they had killed their attackers or frightened them enough to make them turn around and run. Y/n wasn't sure which she'd prefer.
"Are you guys done arguing so I can come out now?" Ellie's voice came out muffled.
Y/n gave Joel one last pissed off look and turned around. "Hang on, I'm coming to get ya!" she said, heading back to the hole in the wall. "Here, hand me your stuff and I'll—"
The sudden sound of the back door to the laundromat bursting open silenced her. There was a gunshot and a yell — whether it was from Joel or his attacker, she couldn't tell. Y/n didn't wait to see what was happening before she practically shoved Ellie back into the hiding spot to keep her out of harm's way.
Y/n turned as someone in dark clothing knocked Joel to the ground, scrambling on top of him pressing his rifle to his neck to choke him. "Now you're gonna fucking pay! What you fucking did, you fucking killed yourself, motherfucker!" the guy shouted, his voice filled with rage. Joel struggled against him, but his grip stayed firm, pressing harder and harder down on his throat. His shoes squeaked against the floor as he tried desperately to move away, but it was useless.
The gun weighed heavy as Y/n lifted it. Arms straight out, finger over the trigger. Joel's struggling was becoming weaker and weaker with every passing second. Beads of sweat collected on Y/n brow. This was no time for indecision. No time for fear. She grit her teeth and gripped the gun even tighter.
Bang.
The man let out a yell as he fell to the side, slumped against the wall. Joel immediately began to gasp and wheeze, taking in heaving breaths of air. Y/n stepped closer, the gun still held out, and she saw that she hadn't killed the man.
He was leaning against the wall, his chest heaving violently. When he removed his hands from under him, they were slick, coated with blood. He struggled to get himself up, grimacing at the pain, and Y/n realized with horror that he couldn't have been much older than she was.
He was just a kid.
"No, no, no, no, no! It's okay! It's okay. It's over. We're not fighting anymore." he shouted frantically, holding a bloodstained hand out to stop her. His voice had completely changed from before. What had been violent rage was now desperate pleading. "I'm gonna go home. I'll tell everyone you're good." he said, his voice choked with tears.
Y/n swallowed, refusing to lower her weapon as a lump in her throat began to form.
Suddenly he sobbed, his voice becoming high-pitched in distraught terror. "I don't know what to do. My legs don't work."
She had shot him in the spine. She must've paralyzed him.
"My mom isn't far, if you could get me to her." he cried.
Joel slowly began to get up, but Y/n was frozen in fear. She couldn't move, couldn't breathe. All she could do was watch this terrified kid beg for his life.
"We could trade with you guys. We could be friends. I didn't know!" he said, panting through tears. "I'm Bryan! I'm Bryan. What's your name?"
Y/n's throat constricted. Tears rushed to her eyes and she didn't stop them, but her body knew better. Tears were weakness. She pushed them away almost as an instinct, but something was still weighing heavy in her chest. Bryan.
Joel's hand suddenly reached out, grabbing the pistol from the top. Y/n suddenly became aware, her eyes darting to Joel's. He said nothing, but the look on his face said all she needed to know: You know what I have to do.
Slowly, she let go of the pistol and found that her hands were shaking violently. He turned back around, causing Bryan to panic. "Wait, wait, wait!" he shouted, doing his best to drag himself further away. all he was doing was backing himself further into a corner. Suddenly he reached into a holster and pulled out a large hunting knife, dropping it to the ground. "You can have it...It's a good knife." he said, his voice becoming even more ragged.
Joel bent down and took the knife from him. Y/n was feeling something she hadn't felt in a long time. Not since the time she watched her mother's eyes close for the last time.
Joel turned to her. "Get back behind the wall." he said.
"No, no, no, no! I'm sorry! Please, please. We could just talk! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Bryan shouted, holding his hand out as if to shield himself from them.
Y/n tried to speak, but choked on her words. She paused, not sure what to say. "Joel," she said finally, her voice coming out as nothing more than a rough whisper.
Joel's expression hardened. "Y/n. Get back."
But she couldn't leave. Bryan was crying out to her, apologizing to her, begging for help. There was nothing they could do to help him, and there was nothing he could do to hurt them. But he had seen their faces, and now he knew their names. And that kind of information was deadly.
Y/n just shook her head, her eyes glazing over just as they had earlier. Joel realized then that there was no convincing her. The damage had already been done. So he turned away from her and cocked the pistol.
"No, please! Please! I'm sorry!" Bryan's cries became even more frantic. "Please! You don't have to! No, no, no! We can just talk!"
He was babbling now. Y/n couldn't move. She looked at Bryan, and for and for one fleeting instant, she saw herself that one December night seven years ago. The night she lost everything but her life.
"Mom! Mom! Mom!"
Bang.
Two days. It had been two days since Y/n had said a word to Joel or Ellie. It had also been two days since Joel had put a bullet in Bryan's head.
She walked like someone possessed, eyes staring blankly ahead, face frozen with no expression.
Ellie did her best to goad her into conversation, but she may as well have been talking to a brick wall. Y/n never replied to her questions or laughed at her jokes. Ellie didn't scare easily, but now she was terrified. Nothing quite like this had ever happened.
The only time they ever heard a sound from her was late into the night, when she thought they were both asleep. That was when she allowed herself to cry.
Joel awoke on the third night to complete silence. As the forest floor came into focus around him, he saw Y/n sleeping bag laying flat on the ground, empty.
He sat up, images of the worst immediately coming to mind. He looked to his other side and saw Ellie, fast asleep in her bedroll. `That calmed some of his nerves, but left a lot of his questions unanswered.
The sun was just barely beginning to rise in the east when he got up, looking around himself for any sign of Y/n. There were none. So, after glancing back one more time to make sure Ellie was safe, he picked a direction and began to walk, hoping to find the elder Pain in His Ass.
He wasn't sure how long he had walked before he found her. She was sitting on the forest floor with her back against the thick trunk of a tree, her knees tucked up to her chest with Joel's jacket draped over them. She looked up when he came around, her eyes red-rimmed and swollen.
For a moment, neither of them said anything, merely accepting the others' presence.
"I'm sorry I took your jacket." Y/n said. Her voice was rough and gravelly, and Joel discovered with surprise that he had almost forgotten what it sounded like.
"Don't worry about it." he replied. "Mind if I sit?"
She said nothing, giving a small nod and turning back to stare off into the distance. Joel moved to sit down next to her, grimacing at the pain in his joints as he did so. Y/n continued to sit like there was no one else there, her blank gaze focused on the horizon.
Joel had a pretty good idea what was bothering her. She had shot someone. And what was worse, she'd left them in pain. He almost thought it would've been better if she'd have killed him with the first bullet.
"Y/n—"
"He was crying for his mom." she said suddenly, cutting him off. "He was crying for his mom and you shot him."
Joel went silent for a moment. He'd had to do things he never imagined himself doing — that had been one of them. "I couldn't take the risk."
She knew what he meant, of course. She understood why he'd done it. And, most of all, she was almost sure that if she'd been in his position, she'd have done the same thing. But seeing firsthand what it looked like to beg for your life reminded her of things she'd rather leave in the past.
"My father was a smuggler." Y/n said, her voice hollow. "We never asked what he did; we just knew that, because of what he did, we lived a lot better than a lot of other people. I'm not really sure what he did — if he had made a bad deal, or double crossed someone that shouldn't be crossed, but I woke up on Christmas morning to gunshots coming from my living room. I should've stayed in my room, I know. But I couldn't just sit there and wait. My whole family was down there. So, I went to see if my dad was okay. He was dead before I got down the stairs. My mom grabbed me and my sister as these three guys pointed guns at our faces. She was screaming at them, begging them not to take her children, begging them to take mercy on us. All three of them shot at once."
Her voice stayed firm and toneless as she spoke. "By the time the bullet hit, I had accepted that I was going to die. My eyes shut and I never once thought they'd open again. But..." Y/n pulled down the hemline of her shirt an inch to reveal a thick white scar just below her collarbone, "fate took pity on me that day. Marlene found me just before I bled out. She kept me alive. And when I woke up, I was in the worst pain I'd ever experienced. All I could do was scream for my mom, ask if she was okay. I never got a straight answer, but I already knew what had happened. I just didn't want to believe it."
Joel listened carefully, his and Ellie's conversation echoing in his mind:
"She's got some rough family stories."
"We all do."
"Not like hers."
She was only seventeen years old — he knew that from the beginning. But now that truly seemed to sink in as he looked at her, sitting with her knees tucked to her chest, huddled under his blanket like it was a coat of armor.
"You shouldn't have had to see that," he said. "No one should."
Y/n nodded in agreement. She knew that it wasn't fair. That none of this was fair. But that didn't change that it had happened, or that she'd have to carry it with her wherever she went. It never really got lighter — that was the thing. All the memories did was get harder and harder to hold.
Her glass expression shattered then as she turned to him, tears falling out of her eyes before she could stop them. "I'm trying so hard to hang on, Joel, I really am," she said, her voice finally breaking. She all but collapsed, leaning her head on his shoulder as hers began to shake with sobs.
It had taken Joel years not to see Sarah in every kid he met — but things always fell through the cracks. When he'd least expect it, a sudden laugh or sarcastic comment would take him back to Austin, back to his daughter, and for a moment he'd almost forget that she was gone.
This was one of those times.
"Oh, Y/n," Joel said quietly, wrapping an arm around her. This girl was not Sarah. No one would ever be Sarah. But right then, Joel was almost sure that she was the closest he was ever going to get at a second chance.
"I'm sorry I don't listen," Y/n said through tears. "I know I need to set a good example for Ellie, but if we lose you...I can't be sure I can get her to the Fireflies by myself. We need you. I..."
She stopped herself just short of saying I need you.
"Hey, it's alright. It's okay. You're not gonna lose me." Joel said. "And sometimes...sometimes you just can't listen. You can't take unnecessary risks, but sometimes the situation demands them. You have the sense to know when that is. The world needs more people like that. Like you.
"Don't even think about losing anyone, okay? You just can't. This whole thing, it's like walking on a tight rope. You look down, that's where you're going. So don't look down."
Y/n was coming back to her senses by now, her shoulders stilling and her tears coming to a steady stop. She nodded, wiping away at the last few stray tears and sitting up. "Don't look down," she repeated. "Is that why you're so grumpy all the time? Because you're always looking down?"
She sort of half-smiled in a way that reminded him so starkly of Sarah that he almost forgot to breathe. But he recovered, giving her a wry grin in return. "It's questions like that that make me want to throw you in a lake."
"Please, with your balance, you'd throw yourself in before anyone else."
#the last of us#the last of us hbo#joel miller#ellie williams#tlou#tlou show#tlou hbo#the last of us fanfiction
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Hello, @a-mag-a-day. Apologies for the deception but I rather wanted to make sure you started reading, so I thought it best not to announce myself. I'm assuming you're alone; you always did prefer to read your statements in private. I wouldn't try too hard to stop reading; there's every likelihood you'll just hurt yourself. So just listen. Now, shall we turn the page and try again?
Statement of landscaping-your-mind regarding episode 160 of The Magnus Archives.
Statement begins.
So, from all the stuff I scheduled for today you can probably tell I really like episode 160 of The Magnus Archives, right? Like, good lord, it is... it is a time. (Also, the words were really good (and also there's poetry) so :D incentive!)
Firstly, though, I have to say something. It's not the Watcher's Crown. The Watcher's Crown is the ritual Jonah Magnus attempted years ago. This is unnamed in canon, but Jonny said it could've been called The Magnus Archives.
Secondly... I would like to draw your attention towards the description of the youtube version of this episode. (to paraphrase)
The Magnus Archive discovers that some escapes are a lot easier than others.
Ahahahahaha AHAHAHAAHAHAH WHAT-
I hate this so much. Like, with a burning passion. "The Magnus Archives discovers that some escapes are a lot easier than others" COME TO MY HOME AND KILL ME YOU COWARD! It just hurts, it just... hurts.
He can escape London, but he can't escape his ✨ purpose ✨
You ever think about how The Magnus Archives follows the story of Magnus' Archive? I do. A lot. I haven't even started listening yet, god, this episode am I right?
MARTIN (Joking) Or, (huffed laugh) or it is, and she just cleaned it up really well. (They both make uncomfortable chuckles) ARCHIVIST …Yes. (The Archivist makes an uneasy noise)
THEYRE BOTH SO AWKWARD THEY HAVEN'T TALKED TO A NORMAL HUMAN IN OVER A YEAR
Just their really awkward laughter, oh my godd they're so endearing your honour, I'm so glad this episode and TMA ends at the 5 minute mark (< in denial)
ARCHIVIST Hopefully a long way out there. (soft) But I think we’re okay
THEY ARE IN LOVE YOUR HONOUR
I just love how soft Jon's voice gets around Martin, like, like, eeeee i just love them i love them they're the reason im aro bc i know i will never love someone romantically as much as jmart loves each other /j
MARTIN Oh, n-no, not yet. I was actually gonna head down into the village to go pick something up?
Ooooh yay I get to share my "where are they in scotland" headcanons! I think they're near Dunnet, because it's pretty far north and in the Highland area, and it's also got allegedly the only full time gunshop north of Inverness, and... yknow, it is Daisy's safehouse.
ARCHIVIST Anyway, don’t tell me the phonebox down there doesn’t appeal to your retro aesthetic.
your honour they're lightheartedly teasing each other <3
ARCHIVIST I’ll be fine.
SOFT!
(update im wrtinging with a cat on my lap now hes big. im balancing my computer on my leg.)
MARTIN I assume it’s her attempt at a- a, a varied diet? Eating your greens, you know? ARCHIVIST (Amused) Probably. (reassured) I’m sure it’ll work fine
hhh them <3 it's just like they're so... they're happy. they're so happy, and it's like nothing gold will stay or whatever
they had such a short amount of time
i wish they were ok
MARTIN …I will give you some privacy. Go for a walk. ARCHIVIST (Warmly) Let me know if you see any good cows. MARTIN Obviously I’m going to tell you if I see any good cows.
I'm...
them being happy is almost worse, right. because what once was a surprise we now know will happen, we have to deal with the dread, and it's all bitter now, the happiness is rotten because of what lurks after.
some people can listen to the first five minutes and feel okay, but me?
for me it just hurts.
ARCHIVIST (CONT’D) (Pleasantly) Statement of Hazel Rutter regarding a fire in her childhood home. Original statement given August 9th, 1992. Audio recording by Jonathan Sims, The Archivist. Statement begins.
He sounded so happy... he sounded so happy.
This is the first time he's happy before he reads a statement. He was happy, he was hiding from the police and the hunters and Daisy and Not!Sasha with his boyfriend in Scotland. And then, and then Jonah Magnus comes in and decides to end the world like a bastard.
I don't want to hit play. I don't want to know what comes next. I want to stop listening. I want Jon and Martin to be okay. I want it to be the real statement of Hazel Rutter.
I just want it to be the real statement of Hazel Rutter.
I get it, right, horror tragedy! This was the desired effect. I am supposed to be feeling these emotions. These emotions being very sad. Well done to Jonny, lovely writing. Fantastic! I love TMA with my whole heart. I think that it's fantastic. I don't want to hit play though. I'm here for the characters suffering, I got in through The Hermit Archives, I wanted more of the horror! I am here for suffering! I'm here for the suffering. I'm hitting play.
Statement of Jonah Magnus regarding Jonathan Sims, The Archivist. Statement begins.
He could have just ended the world. Like, the whole... forcing Jon to monologue about all the times he was manipulated into furthering Jonah's plan? That's fucked. That is fucked. Just put the ritual there you slimy piece of shit!
It’s rare that you get the chance to monologue through the voice of another, and you can’t tell me you’re not curious.
*me to my dog, in the "talking to a dog" voice* You wanna kill him too! Hey! You wanna kill him too!
Like, okay, so you're Jon and you're reading this statement and you can't stop, and this bastard says "you can't tell me you're not curious." Tell me that's not going to make him think that if he tried a little harder then he would've been able to stop reading. Tell me that's not going to make him think that a part of him wanted to end the world, and that's why he's still reading. Tell me that's not going to make him blame himself even more.
The only way to ensure I did not suffer the tribulations of what I believed to be an inevitable transformation was to bring it about myself.
He's so bloody arrogant. He puts himself above the entire world. It makes sense, he's from Regency era England, but like, it's still... really awful. Awful person.
Beyond that, I was getting older, and mortality began to weigh more heavily on my mind. How much in this world is done because we fear death, the last and greatest terror?
When I fear death I distract myself, not try to end the world. Like, this guy is just so evil. His only redeeming quality is being funny sometimes.
Everyone dies, Jack Magnet, you just chose to be a bastard about it.
Of course, I had to make sure the location was kept under my control while I worked on revising my plans, and so I moved the organization I had founded to assist in my research down to London, and the Institute as you know it, was born.
Right, so The Magnus Protocol's Magnus Institute was located in Manchester, and I'm not an expert on the geography of the United Kingdom, and basically know nothing about Manchester, bar that it has the... football, I want to say, team Manchester United? I don't know how I know that. But it seems as though Jonah Magnus didn't attempt his ritual, or attempted it some other way in that universe.
You see, the role of Archivist has been part of the Beholding for as far back as my research can go. This isn’t uncommon for the Powers; most of the beliefs around them are guesswork and fallible human interpretation, but there are certain through lines and consistencies that can be spotted, regardless of the trappings.
I wonder what the others are. The Dancer could be one - The Dancer in The Unknowing. I think Jonny said in a QnA, but you know, the author is dead, he's speaking to us posthumously, that The Architect could have been one. Not sure what others. If y'all have any ideas... 👀
More than once I thought she must secretly be of the Hunt; but there was never that sick joy in her, that thrill of predator and prey. She had simply decided that this was her position in life, and went about it with a practicality that even I found disconcerting at times.
Ok, Mr. Jonah "orchestrates twelve traumatising events for this one guy and gets him to end the world" Magnus. He cannot talk, he cannot talk at all. Sure, she sacrificed people, but she wasn't malicious. She did it for a cause. Did she believe she was good? I'm not sure she cared.
Jonah Magnus is just awful for his own self gain.
You see, the thing about the Fears is that they can never be truly separated from each other. When does the fear of sudden violence transition into the panic of hunted prey? When does the mask of the Stranger become the deception of the Spiral? Even those that seem to exist in direct opposition rely on each other for their definition as much as up relies on down. To try and create a world with only the Buried makes as much sense as trying to conceive a world with only down.
Gerry's colour explanation makes a lot of sense if you don't conceive of it as a traditional colour wheel. They're growing out in every direction, they all overlap with each other.
Sure, the fear of The Eye may seem in direct opposition to the fear of The Stranger, but let's take Jon, for instance. Is it not sort of Stranger to have some guy in a coffee shop staring at you with his autistic eyes, a person you don't know, but who definitely knows you?
What about the fear of The Buried and the fear of The Vast. Episode 195 covers that pretty handily. They're all interconnected with all of the others. Separating them makes them easier to understand (and invertedly makes them actually separated), but it isn't them, not truly. They are connected intrinsically.
Even the coffin! The fear of being alone in the dark is a part of the coffin.
Because the thing about the Archivist is that, well, it’s a bit of a misnomer. It might, perhaps, be better named: The Archive. Because you do not administer and preserve the records of fear, Jon. You are a record of fear, both in mind as you walk the shuddering dread of each statement, and in body as the Powers each leave their mark upon you. You are a living chronicle of terror.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about this. The Archivist is something... defined by how they feed their patron, but The Archive is defined by how they've been hurt to bring it into the world. He's not defined by even a person-like role, he's something molded by Jonah Magnus' desires to end the world.
I wrote a little poem about it, which I shall share here, because I am cringe but I am free, unlike Jon. RIP
He's not a person with a name, He's a vessel of destruction, He's not a person who feels pain, It's necessary for production, That he's scarred and marked, By things that lurk in the dark, Believe himself useless, Or it'll be fruitless, And at the end of the day, He's no person, no name, He's a plan that has come to fruition.
Also, he calls himself The Archivist, perhaps viewing himself as... something that hurts others, rather than something that is hurt for a purpose.
I’ll admit, my options were somewhat limited, but my god, when you came to me already marked by the Web, I knew it had to be you. I even held out some small hope you had been sent by the Spider as a sort of implicit blessing on my whole project and, do you know what, I think it was.
"I chose you" "I'll admit, my options were somewhat limited" Mr. Magnet, he was chosen by the web. Jonah's just not afraid to be puppeted.
So, when Jane Prentiss attacked, I watched eagerly, one hand on the gas release from the start.
This line fucked me up. "One hand on the gas release from the start." Just... like it just sticks in my mind. How he held all their lives in the palm of his hand, how he let Sasha die, and Tim get eaten by worms, because he wanted his bloody perfect Archive.
One hand on the gas release from the start, while all of them almost - or did - die(d).
Like, what gets me is how fucked up Jon was afterwards, how he was asking everyone for their statements, shutting them up before they got to the part where they'd mention Jon and Tim getting eaten with worms. What gets me is how Elias was there and Jon was what, looked like a bloody mummy! He didn't have second thoughts when he saw...
He knew everything. He saw everything. He saw how fucked up Jon was over e v e r y t h i n g. (everything)
That's what gets me.
Between the stabbing and at least two desperate flights into its door, you’re marked very deep by the Spiral.
And, you know, the manipulation, the gaslighting, the betrayal. I saw an interesting post on this, but I can't seem to find it. I'll look in the posts I've rbed tagged TMA meta, I'll link it in a reblog if I find it.
Honestly, I had nothing to do with Melanie and her Slaughter adventure, but when I saw the situation, I made sure to trap her here, so whenever her rage bubbled over you were right there, a ready target.
You know after Jon's second kidnapping that could have totally been resolved how Jonah made Jon stand in front of Melanie while she wanted to kill Jonah with a knife, and how it's like oh, right, yeah, use Jon as a bloody meat shield to get her angry at him, make him the scapegoat, that was intentional. It was intentional to destroy everyone in the Archives' interpersonal relationships, and then have Jon. A ready target for hatred and vitriol.
How is Martin, by the way? He looks well. You will keep an eye on him when all this is over, won’t you? He’s earned that.
I think that Jonah Magnus should eat shit and die.
The power of the Ceaseless Watcher flows through you, and the time of our victory is here.
If you replace the Ceaseless Watcher with Determination then it reads like an Undertale save.
* The power of Determination flows through you, and the time of our victory is here.
Don’t worry, Jon. You’ll get used to it here, in the world that we have made.
This also ties in with the above, I hate that he says "our victory" "the world that we have made." Jon didn't consent to this, Jon didn't want this, Jon was made to be an unwilling conduit of the apocolypse and Jonah Magnus is insinuating that he chose it, the victim blaming little prick!
You who watch and know and understand none. You who listen and hear and will not comprehend. You who wait and wait and drink in all that is not yours by right. Come to us in your wholeness. Come to us in your perfection. Bring all that is fear and all that is terror and all that is the awful dread that crawls and chokes and blinds and falls and twists and leaves and hides and weaves and burns and hunts and rips and bleeds and dies! Come to us. I OPEN THE DOOR!
GREAT INCANTATION! 10/10! And it's actually recitable, unlike the TBI one.
ARCHIVIST Look at the sky, Martin. Look at the sky. It’s looking back.
That is a fucking fantastic final line of the episode. All of it, four seasons leading up to this moment. Look at the sky. It's looking back.
Fuck dude!
(The Archivist begins a fractured, delirious, humourless, laugh that does not end)
That laugh.
That laugh is just... haunting. I love it so much. It makes me want to cry. I used to have it saved on my phone and I'd just listen to it over and over and over again and get more and more disturbed and heartbroken.
That laugh. That broken, horrific laugh.
I can't get over it.
And thus ends season 4 of The Magnus Archives. With a broken laugh in front of a window, leading out to the doomed world.
Episode 160 is quite possibly my favourite metaplot episode of The Magnus Archives, the way the whole plan was revealed, the awful manipulations that were exposed... that laugh.
I leave you all to think on this. To think on the Archive née the Archivist née Jonathan Sims, laughing at the world he has unwillingly and unwittingly doomed.
Goodnight, a-mag-a-day, goodnight. /ref
#tma#tma meta#the magnus archives#the magnus archives meta#mag 160#jonah magnus#jonathan sims#elias bouchard#tma spoilers#tma s4 spoilers#a mag a day#i am so abnormal about this episode you do not even know#well i think you do now-#landscaping your mind chapter one
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Gregory Bridgerton is, with all Possible Affection, the Dumbest Bridgerton Sibling
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a hot romantic regency male lead must be in want of a more intelligent heroine. But even given that, Gregory flippin' Bridgerton strains credibility about how obtuse he is throughout this book. Anthony might have been lying to himself and deeply traumatized, Benedict might have been a chauvinist dickhead, and Colin might have been a golden retriever, but none of them were so vacuously vague as Gregory managed to be. That's not to say that I didn't enjoy this book; there were chunks of it I found thoroughly amusing. So let's talk On the Way to the Wedding.
I guess we might as well start with Gregory, because holy cow there was no critical thought in this man's head. He literally did not hear a thing Lucy said to him the night before her wedding to Haselby, because AS COLIN POINTED OUT while he and Gregory were *checks notes* SITTING IN A TREE SPYING ON LUCY'S HOUSE, she did not actually ever at any point say that she wasn't going to marry Haselby, she just made bland statements and let Gregory hear what he wanted to. Like, Greg. Sweetie, honey, friend, she did not explicitly say she was calling off the wedding, and you KNOW she would have if she really intended to. You were thinking with the wrong head, my dude, and frankly it's on your own dang head for being so shocked the next morning.
But on top of having cloth ears when it comes to hearing "no," Gregory managed to talk himself into being in love with Hermione and out of being in live with Lucy. And this is AFTER separate sit downs with Anthony, Kate, and Violet that collectively tell the reader (and should have told Gregory, except he has cotton wool instead of a brain inside his skull) that Gregory has exactly zero connection with reality, no drive or ambition, and has had so much handed to him in life that he won't extend effort to get something that isn't handed to him. Quite literally, my reaction was, "Aww, Lucy gets the second-worst brother. She and Sophie should get together and start a support group." So Gregory and Benedict are super not my favorite Bridgerton Brothers.
One thing about Gregory that was well set up and paid off and used fairly humorously throughout though, is his complete inability to hit anything he aims at with a firearm. I was impressed that he was not toxically masculine about that, and the fact that he nonfatally shot Uncle Richard at the end was well executed, and Lucy telling her Uncle that he is lucky Gregory can't aim for shit actually got a laugh from me. It was very good. AND it established that all four Bridgerton girls can shoot as well, so at some point I want a pall mall game settled via target shooting. My bet is that Eloise thinks she's the best shot, Francesca actually is, Hyacinth does trick shots just to piss off Eloise, and Daphne is scarily efficient as a markswoman.
However, what really kept this book interesting were Lucy and the CW drama-esque plot, because I did not see "oopsie poopsie, did a treason, and now my neice has to marry my blackmailer's gay son" coming in the Bridgertonverse, but here we are, I guess.
Lucy falls into line with Penelope and Sophie in terms of women who are head and shoulders more competent than the Bridgerton man they married, although admittedly Lucy has less personality than either Penelope or Sophie. Lucy is a people manager and pleaser, and she is extremely organized. She also has some excellent one-liners and is more than smart enough to wrap Gregory around her little finger when she needs to.
Unfortunately, she couldn't talk Gregory's stubborn streak out of tying her to a water closet (seriously, what is this, a regency Criminal Minds episode???), which is how we get the big reveal that it's her Uncle, not her father, who committed treason. It's also how we somehow end up with Uncle Richard holding a gun to Sophie in a random bedroom before her marriage to Haselby was consummated, which... Richard. Honey. What was the plan here??? You needed that girl legally and permanently married before Davenport gave up the blackmail. Why are you holding a gun on her right now??? What the hell was the way out of this room of you hadn't been interrupted by the husband squad and their two guns? Weird time for a power trip, is all I can say. You might as well have gotten caught monologuing for all the sense this scene setup made.
And Gregory once again proves that he is a COMPLETE IMBECILE because if you spend an entire book announcing repeatedly that you can't hit the broad side of a barn, why on God's little green earth do you take the shot at a man holding a gun to your love's head? You're as likely to hit her as him! He got lucky because plot armor, but he wasn't the only man in the room with a gun, Lucy's very angry brother ALSO had one, and he was almost certainly a better shot than Gregory. Nobody is exercising critical thought in this scene, is all I'm saying.
Now, for all my criticisms, if you suspend your disbelief, this whole scene is VERY fun, and in principle I quite enjoyed it. Sometimes you have to meet a book where it's at, and in this case it was at CW-esque dramatic farce. So this book was very fun for what it was.
OOH and before I wrap.up and forget: Hyacinth gets to be totally furious in this book, and holy cow I wish we got Hyacinth in a decade st some point, because she would have been show Lady Danbury's equal but more spitfire, and I love that so much for all of us.
This is definitely the last Bridgerton book I'm reading because I have no desire to deal with Daphne or Eloise's books. That said though, the books I have read I was largely either pleasantly surprised by or thoroughly entertained, and really you can't ask more of these books than that. Book Benedict still sucks though.
#julia quinn#bridgerton#bridgerton books#on the way to the wedding#gregory bridgerton#lucy abernathy#regency romance#romance novel#romance books
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I saw it be said a few times that Boeing is mature and whilst that man is a lot of things that have me questioning if I'm like... Mentally okay to have such a carnal desire for them. Mature is not one of the traits I'd assign. This is a man who is literally playing games with not just one now but two of his exes. He's spent what months? years maybe? being Tops go to call when he doesn't want a lonely night, the second he feels threatened of his security in Tops fucked up life, he makes a move on the so called threat aka Mew. He's master manipulating. Everything he says is double edged and eery and unsettling. Just how much does he pull strings on Top? You see it in how he talks to him, how he touches him.
Boeing doesn't care for Tops boundaries, he may have even been the start of Tops issues with fighting for his own boundaries being respected. Boeing does this thing where he keeps Top coming back to him for more, and he lords it over him. How long has it been, are you still sticking to the three month rule? He knows exactly the power he has and by god does he wield it. Sabotaging Tops other relationships so he can keep number one spot. Deceiving Mew so easily into believing it's a revenge that won't bite him in the ass, that he's a friend and not a wolf in sheep's clothing.
And as if that's not enough, he then next episode targets Sand again, purely because he hears about how Sand has moved on. Kinda like how he doubles down on his position in Tops life because he thinks Top can finally move on with Mew. Like he's terrified of someone replacing his legacy as The Best Option. Boeing likes pulling puppet strings, he likes keeping people stagnant in a place he can leave them and come back to peck at what's left later like a vulture. And the worst part is he does it because he needs attention.
There he is simpering to Mew and Sand about how he thinks he can be a better boyfriend than their current partners. Using Mews history against him, spinning this tale where Top is selfish and Boeing is "The Good Guy", then using his own history with Sand to delude Sand into this vision where he's blameless and just wants him back bad enough he's willing to be "The Bad Guy".
Funny how Boeing only starts caring if he still stands a chance when he thinks his position is threatened as Sands most important ex. He's still got his little revenge plot with Mew in the works but he wants Sand on his belt too. Also, all this man does is talk about his exes. He tells stories of the past where he and Sand played quiz nights at the bar, where Top took him wakeboarding and made him a pro. Constantly trying to undermine what his exes newest partners may see as special time for them because oh hey btw I did that first. The sheer audacity to bring up dates Sand and him used to do whilst at the same time he was prioritising Top over Sand? As if they're like fond memories?
Boeing presents himself as this true friends stab you in the front archetype but he's just a lost, lonely man desperate for even a shred of someone's attention and value. And that's kind of sad actually. Like babes move the fuck on? Get a life outside of these men's business and stop bothering them?
We love Boeing because he steps on the scene and emits this mean girl Regina George energy where you're like oh this vindictive little bitch is truly a supreme conniving pussy slaying cow. But when you peel back his layers it's like you are the most pathetic man to ever breathe sir. How hard is it to just move forward in life?
Boeing is that smart and that pretty and that good at pulling strings to get to high places and he wastes his time circling the flakey little meal that is this group of men. He literally invented gaslight, gatekeep and girlboss specifically for his exes and even Boston would shake in his leather studded cunt serving boots at the sight of Boeing. And yet, he's insignificant. He means nothing to anyone. He's indisposable at any time and he Knows it. He knows one day Top will say he no longer needs Boeing to play ghost of his past still haunting. That Sand will eventually see why Boeing was never the right one. So he claws for control by removing options. Because he'd never be a first choice all on his own.
I'm obsessed with him, I crave him carnally and viciously. I'd do truly wicked things to that maleficent poisonous man. But he better leave Sand tf alone. It's about time someone tells Boeing they want someone whose actually willing to change for them, to see past what is so say "not enough" within them to make Boeing truly loyal or commited, to choose someone who genuinely tries rather than someone who clings to falsified memories of a past with a significance that didn't and doesn't exist.
And yes I do want Sand to be the one to say it because my biggest fear is that Ray will go in all guns blazing when he overhears Boeing making a move on his man, take over the situation and then Sand will lose his chance to get closure and put autonomy back on Boeing for his part in the downfall of their relationship. If ray interferes, it's a loss of a chance for sand to make a point that he chooses ray no matter what in a way Ray can witness and feel the significance of. Because Ray knows but he's still learning that Sand will choose him over everything and he needs to hear Sand of his own volition, let go of such an important part of his past because Ray is the future he picks.
Top got the chance to clearly tell Boeing he picks Mew and now I need to see Sand do the same for Ray without Ray "forcing his hand" to use Rays expression from the ep when it came to making Sand make a big choice the first time around.
#only friends the series#this is such a weird fear for me bc i know sand would pick ray now over boeing#bc it makes no sense for sand atp in his growth to go back to boeing anyway#he just managed to get ray to let him love him whilst being a better version of himself#then hes gonna settle for bare minimum boeing anyway? nah dont make no sense#but im still fearful of how this goes down when boeing has been shown to have such a strong influence and grip on sand#to the point sand removed blame from him for going to top and views him as the one who got away#and also bc i really dont want impulsive mode ray to make the choice for sand in that split second#it takes from a key moment we could see ray heal by standing aside#still hearing sand say fuck that i cared once but it will always be ray
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So I finished watching WeCrashed today, which is the dramatized reenactment of the whole WeWork fiasco, and to get this out of the way early: It was a pretty good show. 9/10
I am biased because I love Anne Hathaway, I think she's wildly underrated by a lot of people. Jared Leto is an enigma of a human being. I am under the impression he is kind of a piece of shit IRL, and I don't entirely disagree. My one and only personal experience impression is the one time my parents took me to Vegas to go see a 30 Seconds to Mars concert, and I kid you not, but this mother fucker showed up sick and basically had the audience sing 90% of the maybe like 5-6 songs he actually performed. Would've ruined the night if it weren't for that also coincidentally being my first Panic! At The Disco concert who opened for him. Went there to see 30 Seconds to Mars, left seeing Panic! At The Disco and wasn't too disappointed, granted I was maybe 14-15 at the time I think, I don't know. Time is an illusion.
Anyways, despite all of that, I shit you not but I think this role was kind of made for him. I've heard Jared Leto has started an actual cult IRL, and from what the show told me about Adam Neumann, he's the type of guy who would probably create a cult himself. And to be honest, he kind of did if the show is to be believed. The entire time I'm watching the show, this man is spinning bullshit like it's golden thread and I kept waiting for the acknowledgement of that; I kept waiting for the behind closed doors scene where he tells his wife, Rebekah (Anne Hathaway), that he's fooled some more cash cows into giving him a shit ton of milk but it never happens and that's because I think this man legitimately believed in every fucking word he said.
The analogy they use in the show is that he's selling people unicorns when unicorns don't even exist, but this man legitimately believes unicorns fucking exist and he's going to make you believe it too. He's simultaneously full of shit, but not at the same time. It was so wild to watch because I just couldn't wrap my head around it. You hear about cult leaders, or shitty CEOs raking in billions of dollars, and you just keep waiting for the other shoe to drop; you keep waiting for the realization that he's actually just this huge piece of shit scamming people out of their money. But I don't know that I feel comfortable calling it a scam when he truly, honestly, and genuinely believes in the bullshit he is selling. It wasn't a bid for money, or power, or control. This man just bought into his own bullshit the same way he sold it to everyone else. He was a drug dealer who partook in his own supply.
The whole time I watched the show, I asked myself if the show was funded in any way by the Neumann's because of just how good it showed them to be. Yes, they were insane. Yes, they wound up financially ruining a lot of people. But at no point did I ever think that was genuinely intentional. If it wasn't obvious already, I went into this show with zero knowledge of WeWork. Literally none. I had only just heard of its existence recently, and I'm actually kind of dumbfounded that a scandal of this magnitude has somehow completely escaped my notice. It took me until I believe episode four before I even understood what it was WeWork even sold. To be honest with you, I'm still not even sure I'm sure what they sold. From my perspective, they sound like glorified landlords but for office jobs, mainly tech companies.
I pride myself on not being as influenced by individuals as others are. I don't do the whole "so-and-so is my hero" nonsense. But I have to admit that if I had met Adam Neumann in person, and he was even half as magnetic as he is portrayed in the show, I'm not entirely sure I wouldn't also be drawn to him. I don't know, man. It's to the point where at the end of the show, when he eventually steps down as CEO and the new CEO is giving his speech, I had this gut feeling of "the bad guys won in the end", even if the "bad guy" in this scenario was the completely rational business expert who actually wanted the company to make a profit. The show sold me the idea that the Neumann's, while fucking insane, were the good guys in this scenario. Which is why I can't help but wonder if this show was somehow funded by them.
Overall, the show was really good. I will say, there was this slight disconnect at the very end though. During the credits, they show a clip from an interview with the real Adam Neumann and Rebekah, and for the most part he seems like a totally normal dude. He's portrayed as kind of manic and psychotic during the show, so it was a major contrast to see him be kind of normal, albeit very passionate in the end.
If there's one type of media drama that I fucking love more, it's all this corporate drama nonsense. It's why Social Network is one of my favorite movies. I just love hearing about the behind the scenes drama of all of these big companies.
TL;DR: I felt so bad for Miguel, the true MVP of WeWork. Fuck me did that man need to grow a spine, but nevertheless I felt bad for him but respected his loyalty to the end all the same.
#random#WeWork#WeCrashed#tv shows#Apple TV#streaming#review#Anne Hathaway#Jared Leto#30 Seconds to Mars
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House Party (And Other Matters)
Paranormal Preteens AU: Episode Three
A JSE Fanfic
And here is part three! After this, I’m gonna start spacing out the parts of this AU a bit more, slowly put it into the ordinary AU rotation I have going on. But for this week, we have this! Chase puts some more effort into bonding with Henrik, but soon after, they realize that the whole group needs to get together to talk about the library incident. They hang out for a while, but are interrupted right at the end. But hey, it turns out alright! I promise. Enjoy!
++++++++++++++++++++
The rest of Saturday and Sunday passed in a bit of a blur. Chase knew his mom could probably tell something was up, but he wasn’t about to tell her what happened. There was no way she’d believe him about a ghost in the library.
Chase had the Jacksons’ phone number now, but he wasn’t sure how to talk to them—or what to talk to them about. What did the two of them even do? Other than wander around town and collect neat rocks (something Chase had seen them do on multiple occasions.) And how do you even start a conversation after seeing a ghost together? Especially when that was only your second interaction with them? So, since he had no idea how to do this, Chase decided to not do it until he needed to, and spent most of the weekend watching TV and occasionally skateboarding down the street.
Things changed on Monday. It was almost one o’clock, and Chase had been alone in the house for the past hour and a half. Mom had taken Henrik out somewhere, probably still trying to get him used to the town. Chase was just wondering when they’d be back when he heard the front door open. He turned around, leaning on the back of the sofa, and watched the two of them walk down the hall.
“—find another one if this doesn’t work out,” Mom was saying. She looked up and saw Chase staring. “Hi, sweets. Did you have lunch?”
“Nah.” Chase shook his head. He’d been thinking about making a sandwich for a while, but honestly? He was half-hoping Mom would bring home food.
“Alright, then. Does mac ‘n’ cheese sound good to the two of you?”
“Yeah!” Chase said. Henrik, standing next to Mom, nodded silently.
“Great. I'll go whip that up.” And with that, Mom disappeared into the kitchen.
Chase and Henrik were alone in the front room. Staring at each other. The TV was on, filling the silence with the sound of commercials. The two of them hadn’t interacted much while at home. Henrik spent most of his time in his room. It wasn’t a privacy thing, since Henrik kept his door open all of the time—even at night! While he slept! So weird—so maybe it was a personal space thing? Chase didn’t really understand. Either way the only time the two of them really saw each other was at meals.
Henrik shifted on his feet, then glanced over at the stairs. Clearly wondering whether it was worth it to go up to his room to wait for lunch to be ready. At that moment, Chase noticed he was holding something. “Is that a stuffed animal?” he asked.
“Was? Ah.” Henrik looked down at the plushie in his hands. “Ja. Your mom took me to the store and let me choose one.”
“Cool.” Chase didn’t have any plushies. At least, ones that weren’t kept in the old toy chest in his closet. But he didn’t have anything against them. “What is it?”
“A bat.” Henrik walked a bit closer, holding up the stuffed animal for Chase to get a better look at. The bat was made of soft-looking black fur, except for some orange felt in its ears and the inside of its wings. It was small and floppy with reflective dark eyes. The main body could be held in two hands, but the wings gave it a bit more size.
“I like bats. They, like, suck your blood and stuff.”
“That is vampires,” Henrik said.
“But there are vampire bats, right?”
“Ja, but they do not eat human blood, only animals like cows,” Henrik explained. “We do not have enough blood for them. And there are many bats. Most eat insects, but there are some who eat fruit or flowers.” He walked a little closer, going around the sofa, and held out the plushie. “Look at this. The bat has...it has...the soft and prickly things on its wings. So you can stick them together and hang it from things.”
“Soft and what?” Chase scooted a bit closer without standing up. “Oh, you mean velcro? Yeah.” There were two squares of velcro on the tips of the plush bat’s wings. “Cool.”
“Velcro,” Henrik repeated. He looked down at the bat and played with the wings, sticking and unsticking them. “It is not very accurate. Bats hang from their feet, not their wings. But I thought it was...cool.”
Chase laughed a little bit. It sounded weird to hear Henrik say a slang word like that. Not really bad. Just weird. He paused for a moment. The silence stretched between them, punctured by ad announcers on the TV. “Hey, uh...you’re smart, right?” Chase finally said. “Do you like, uh...space?”
Henrik blinked. “Do you mean...outer space?”
“Yeah.”
“I...I suppose. I think stars are interesting.”
“Okay.” Chase nodded. “What do you think about aliens?”
“Well...it would make sense for them to be real,” Henrik said slowly. “The universe is very big. But we probably will not see them in our lives.”
“Okay, but are aliens cool?” Chase asked.
Henrik stared at him. “I...suppose?”
“Alright good.” Chase scooted back to his previous spot on the sofa, leaving a full cushion of room next to him. “I was thinking about it, and like, we never have anything to talk about. And I think that’s because we don’t know any of the same things. So I’m gonna show you this show I like. About aliens.”
“Now?” Henrik asked, surprised.
“Yeah, the next episode’s starting soon.”
Henrik took a step back. “I should...I should ask Aunt Jess if I can watch the television.”
Chase raised an eyebrow. “She’s not gonna care, dude. As long as you don’t spend all day watching TV.” Henrik didn’t show any signs of sitting down, though, so he sighed. “But I mean...you can. I’m not gonna stop you. Just be back here really quick, it’s almost time.”
Henrik nodded, then hurried into the kitchen. Chase idly watched the commercials for a minute before he returned. “Alright,” he said, climbing onto the sofa next to Chase. “We can watch the television until it is time for lunch. A-and she said we could keep going after.”
“See? Told you Mom wouldn’t care.” Chase laughed. “You’re just in time, too. I was really hoping you wouldn’t miss the theme song, it’s great.”
It was a little awkward at first. Chase kept glancing over at Henrik to see if he was having a good time. And for a while, it seemed like he wasn’t. He was sitting on the sofa straight up, right on the edge of the cushion, his feet just shy of resting on the floor. Chase had never seen a kid sit like that while watching TV. But after a little bit, Henrik seemed to relax a little. Eventually, he started to ask Chase questions about the show. Chase was all too happy to answer. Once that got going, Henrik relaxed even more. He seemed fascinated with the show.
“—and so now they’re enemies,” Chase finished. “And they fight a few times. But now they’re forced to fight together in this episode because, I mean, how else are they gonna make it through the alien fighting pit? One of them’s on a timer and the other one’s only a tenth as powerful.”
“Ah, okay, okay.” Henrik nodded. The colors of the show reflected in his glasses.
“Do you not get English shows in Germany?” Chase asked.
“No, they do a thing where they get other actors to say the lines in German and put that instead of the English voices,” Henrik said.
“Oh. Maybe you just don’t get this show, then.” Or any of the other TV shows Chase had ever mentioned.
“Maybe we do?” Henrik shrugged, fiddling with the wings of the bat plushie. “I do not know. I do not watch a lot of it.” He paused. “But I think this is...good.”
Chase grinned. “Glad to hear that. Uh...thanks, Henrik.”
“Oh. Ah...” Henrik started to say something, stopped, then started over. “Can you...can you call me the nickname you used instead? On Saturday?”
“At the library?” Chase took a moment to remember what he was talking about. “Oh, you mean Schneep?”
Henrik nodded. “Ah, do not use it in front of your mom. O-or any other adults. But I think—I-I think that if it is just us, or other—other children—”
Chase leaned over and nudged him, pressing his shoulder against his. “Alright, Schneep. If you say so.” He smiled. “I guess it does kinda suit you.”
Henrik—Schneep had tensed for a moment at the sudden nudge, but then he smiled back. “Thank you,” he muttered, ducking his head and half-burying his face in the bat plushie.
They finished the episode and were in the in-between-shows commercials when Mom called out, “Boys! It’s time for lunch!”
“Shoot, we might miss the start of the next one,” Chase muttered. “Whatever, it’s fine. It’s probably not a new one, I can fill you in on what we missed.” And with that, the two of them headed into the dining room.
They were halfway through their mac ‘n’ cheese when Mom set her own lunch aside and sat up straight. “Alright. So. It turns out I’ll have to go into the office tonight, at six. I’ll be back around nine.”
“So we’re staying home alone?” Chase asked, perking up.
Mom smiled a little. “No, Chase, you’re not staying home alone.”
Chase deflated. “Why nooooot? I was staying home alone for, like, all of last year! I was alone earlier today! And then—then March happened and I—”
“March and April were different,” Mom said patiently. “We weren’t about to leave you home alone for that long so often. And you’re right, you were alone earlier. But the difference is that it was daytime, and only for an hour. This is night. I want to be sure you’re safe. And...maybe I would be fine with leaving just you alone, Chase, but I’m a bit more nervous with the two of you here.”
Chase pointed across the table at Schneep. “I’m older! I can look after him!”
“You are only one year older than me,” Schneep said. “Actually, you are only seven months older than me. That is even less.”
“Well, yeah, but you’re kinda tiny,” Chase pointed out.
Schneep looked down at himself, as if he could see whatever factor made him look so short. Personally, Chase thought the big sweaters he wore didn’t help.
“Either way, I still feel nervous,” Mom said. “So...I thought I’d call Jackie to come watch you for those hours.”
“...Oh.” Chase nodded. “Uh, yeah. That makes sense. If you’re nervous.”
Mom chuckled a bit. He didn’t understand what was so funny. “Alright. I can call right now, and see if sh—he’ll be able to make it.”
Suddenly, Chase got an idea. “Oh! Uh, Mom? Is it okay if we, uhhh...when Jackie comes over, we call some other kids to come over too? Uh, those two we saw on Saturday. Marvin and Jameson. And we can hang out and...talk and stuff.” Schneep, catching on quickly, nodded in support of Chase’s suggestion.
“Hmm? Sure, if they can come over, they’re free to.” Mom chuckled again. “I’ll have to ask Jackie if he’s okay with watching four kids instead of just two, though, so be prepared.”
Chase nodded. He looked across the table, and caught Schneep’s attention. The two of them had the same look in their eyes. It was time to talk about the library.
++++++++++++++++++++
The others arrived a few hours later, around 5:30. Chase was in his room, playing on his Nintendo DS, when Mom called from downstairs, “Chase! Henrik! Your friends are here!” So Chase saved the game, exiting to the main menu, and started downstairs. Schneep poked his head out of his room right as Chase passed his doorway, then followed him.
The Jacksons had arrived first. Mom was talking with them. “It’s very nice to meet you,” she said. “Your family lives down on Riverview, right?”
“Yep,” Marvin said.
“That’s quite a ways away.” Mom sounded concerned. “You didn’t walk the whole way here, did you?”
“No, we rode our bikes,” Marvin said, pointing through the window next to the door. “It didn’t really take that long, cause there’s this big hill on our street so we went fast down that and kept up the speed all the way here. That’s cause of, like, some science stuff.” He glanced at Jameson, who finger-spelled something in sign. “Inertia! Stuff in motion stays in motion.”
Mom laughed. “Alright. But if you need me to drive you home afterwards, I’ll be happy to. Or you can use our phone to call your parents.”
The twins nodded in unison. Then Jameson asked something in sign.
“Oh! Yes of course.” Mom pointed into the living room. “It’s right off the front room, sort of under the stairs. Feel free to leave your bag on the couch or something.”
Jameson smiled, signed something else, then headed in the direction she indicated. He waved at Chase and Schneep as he passed.
“Mom, do you know sign language?” Chase asked.
“Hmm? Oh, yes.” Mom nodded. “You know how Grandpa’s getting a little hard of hearing, so I learned ASL, and then figured why not learn BSL too since we’re living here?”
“Oh. Can you teach me?” Chase glanced at Schneep. “And Henrik, too.”
“Of course, Chase. We can start whenever you like.”
“Hi, Chase!” Marvin waved. “Hi, Henrik! Your house is cool. You have a front yard! Do you have a backyard? I didn’t get to see it from outside cause of your fence. That’s called a solid fence style, y’know, and I think your fence is plastic because the planks look too much like each other. But that’s good cause you don’t get splinters.”
“Uhhh yeah, it’s fake wood,” Chase said. “We put it up when we moved in. Do you wanna, uh, go into the living room?”
“Sure!” And without waiting at all, Marvin headed into the living room, forcing Chase and Schneep to follow. “Holy shit! You have three video game boxes!”
“Dude! My mom is right there!” Chase glanced over his shoulder, at his mom who was still in view and definitely within earshot. There was a look of surprise on her face. “You can’t just say words like that!”
“Okay,” Marvin said absentmindedly. He was too busy kneeling in front of the TV and looking at Chase’s game consoles. “You have an Xbox and a PS3?! Jeez! That’s awesome! What’s the purple one?”
“That’s a GameCube,” Chase said. “It’s kinda old. We used to have other old ones too, but uh...not anymore.”
“Cube,” Marvin repeated. “Cuuube. It’s a good name for it, ‘cause it’s a cubical video game box.”
At that moment, the bathroom door opened and Jameson reappeared. “Hi,” Chase said to him, then looked back at Marvin. “They’re called ‘consoles,’ you know.”
“Ohhh. Okay, that makes sense. I’ve heard that word before.” Marvin stood up. “We have a Wii. Right, JJ?” Jameson nodded, and signed something. “Oh, I’m looking at Chase’s game boxes—game consoles. He has three! That’s fucking insane! How many games do you have?”
“Uhhh...this many.” Chase walked over to the side of the TV, where there was a cabinet that came up to chest height. He swung open the doors to reveal shelves of video games. The cabinet wasn’t full; there were conspicuous empty gaps in the shelves. But it was still an impressive collection. “Again, we used to have more old games, but...now we don’t.” Schneep gave him an odd look at that, but the twins either didn’t notice the note of sadness in Chase’s voice or they didn’t care. The two of them clustered around the cabinet, signing at each other excitedly. Chase stepped back to give them some space.
Someone rang the doorbell. Chase glanced towards the sound, moving a bit so he could get a better angle of the front hallway. Mom looked through the small peephole in the wood, then opened the door and smiled. “Hi, Jackie. Thank you so much for stopping by, I hope it’s not too much trouble.”
“No, it’s okay, Ms. Walker. I mean, I’m not doing anything on a Monday night.” Jackie stepped into the house, glancing around. “Um...looks the same in here as last time, heh.”
“Yeah, not much has changed. Not down here, anyway. We’ve done some rearranging upstairs.” Mom kept one hand on the open door’s handle, checking the watch on her other wrist. “I really have to go if I’m going to make it in time. Look, if you have any trouble, I left my phone number on a sticky note on the fridge. There’s also some money to order food if you don’t want to cook. They should probably have dinner soon.”
“Got it.” Jackie nodded. “Don’t worry about anything, Ms. Walker. I can handle it.”
Mom laughed. “If you insist. Still, please call me if you need anything. Don’t worry about interrupting me, this is more important. I’ll be back around nine, nine-thirty at the latest. Good luck. And I’ll see you then.”
“Goodbye, Ms. Walker.” Jackie watched as Mom walked out the front door, waving to her as she got in her car and drove off. Then he closed the door and turned around to see Chase staring at him. “Hey, little man. So, uh...all your friends are over, then?”
“No, just the Jacksons.” Chase shrugged. “Uh...I guess we’re friends? I haven’t really talked to them that much—”
“It’s beanie boy!” Marvin shouted from the living room, sounding delighted. “Beanie boy’s the babysitter!” Next to him, Jameson laughed quietly.
“Hi, there.” Jackie walked into the living room, Chase following close behind. “You’re Marvin, right? I think I told you my name was Jackie. I’m not even wearing my beanie tonight.” True, that part of his outfit was missing. The red hoodie was still there, though. And there was an additional backpack, which he put down on the floor next to an armchair.
“Sorry, I’m not good with names,” Marvin said. “Or faces. Or voices. I know accents, though.”
Jackie laughed a bit. “Alright. Understandable. Hey, are you guys hungry?”
“Is it time for dinner?” Schneep asked. He’d settled down on the sofa at some point.
“It can be, if you guys are hungry. Chase’s mom said she left money for food. We could order pizza.”
Jameson gasped. He nodded quickly, then hurried over to the chair where he left his shoulder bag, pulling out his notepad and pencil. Meanwhile, Chase started up a chant of, “Piz-za! Piz-za! Piz-za!” which Marvin soon joined, and eventually Schneep.
“Alright, alright, I got it.” Jackie grinned, bending over to get his cell phone out of his backpack. “Pizza from anywhere in particular?”
“Mom and I always get Queen Cleo’s,” Chase said. “And we get a bag of—we get two bags of crazy bread.” He looked around at the others. “Guys? What toppings do you want? I want pepperoni, but we can get a half-and-half one. No olives, though, because they seep into all the pizza.”
Jameson already had an answer for this. He flipped his notebook over to reveal what he’d been writing. Marvin doesn’t like any toppings, just plain cheese. I like pepperoni and/or mushrooms. Absolutely NO pineapple for either of us, because that’s just weird.
“What?! Pineapple is good!” Chase said. “Jackie, get pineapple!”
“You already cast your vote for pepperoni, guy,” Jackie said, dialing the number for the pizza place.
Chase made a face, then moved on. “Schneep, what do you want?”
“I...ah...” Schneep looked a little lost. “It has been a long time since I had pizza. I-I think that just cheese is fine?”
“So we’ll get a half-cheese half-pepperoni with two packets of crazy bread, got it.” Jackie nodded.
Jameson reached over and tapped Chase’s shoulder to get his attention. Chase, can we play video games on your consoles?
“Oh yeah!” Chase grinned, practically bouncing with excitement. “Schneep, do you want to play? We have multiplayer games!”
Schneep shook his head. “I do not think I will be very good. But I will sit and watch. It will be like TV, yes?”
“You don’t have to be good at video games, you just have to have fun!”
“Well, I think I will have more fun if I sit and watch. Maybe...another time?” Schneep offered.
“Hmm.” Chase nodded. “Yeah, that’s okay.” He just barely got Schneep to sit down and watch TV with him, maybe video games were too much. Baby steps, as Mom said. “Okay, so what do you two want to play?” he asked, spinning back around to look at the twins.
The two of them were already back by the game cabinet. Jameson pulled out one of the cases and showed it to Marvin. “Really?” Marvin said. “I don’t think more than one person can play that. Why?” Jameson signed something. “Okay, yeah, but he’s not like a cute hedgehog, he’s more like a cartoon who fights crime and has an ‘attitude,’ tee-em. Do you just like it because he’s blue?”
“Which one are you looking at?” Chase leaned over their shoulders. “Oh, no, that one’s hard, you don’t want to pick that one. And Marvin’s right, it’s only single player.”
Jameson looked him dead in the eyes, and lightly tossed the game over towards the TV, where it landed right in front of the consoles.
“Alright, fine.” Chase went over and picked it up. “We’ll take turns. Switch off every time someone gets stuck, which will happen a lot.” He started setting up the Xbox. “Or maybe we could each do one of the story stages, cause there are, like, three different stories with three different main characters. I call Shadow’s.”
And with that, the four of them settled on and around the sofa, ready to start playing.
++++++++++++++++++++
It took almost an hour for the pizza to arrive, during which the three of them made almost no progress on the game. Chase insisted they start from a new save file, and this turned out to be a good idea, as the twins had no idea how to use the Xbox controller so even the first levels were difficult. The two of them were stubborn, though. Between Chase’s coaching and their efforts they managed to each get through two levels. Meanwhile, Schneep was just as fascinated with the video game as he was with the TV show. He kept asking Chase questions about what was going on. Eventually, Chase found himself explaining each character’s backstory and how they all fit into this game. The other three were all very interested in this, which Chase was happy to hear.
Jackie didn’t participate much in the conversation, letting the four of them play the game on their own. He sat in a chair nearby and watched quietly. Chase kept asking him questions to pull him into talking, though, which he didn’t seem to mind. It was through Jackie that Chase learned there were video games you could play on the computer. And not Internet games, which he already knew about, but full-on game games. Chase asked him what his favorite one was, and Jackie gave a couple examples, none of which he’d heard of.
And then the doorbell rang, and the pizza arrived, and everything stopped so they could eat. It was delicious, of course, but soon after everyone had taken a slice...Chase figured it was finally time to bring up the elephant in the room. “Uh, so. After we finish eating,” he said, “could we talk about...about what happened in the library? Do you think we’ve...processed that enough?”
Marvin and Jameson looked at each other, then nodded. Schneep said nothing, but Chase already knew he was on board. “Do you...are you including me in that?” Jackie asked.
Chase thought about it. “Yeah. I mean, you picked us up. You’re kinda involved.”
“Alright, then. When you’re ready, I guess.”
They sat down in the living room again. Chase turned off the game, making sure it was saved, and looked around. Jackie was back in his armchair. The twins were on the sofa, sitting close enough to take up one cushion while Schneep had the other to himself. And Chase was standing, too nervous to sit. “So...” he said. “Uh...library ghost, huh?”
“Yeah, what happened?” Jackie asked. “I know you told me in the car, but can you tell me again?”
Together, the four of them gave a quick overview of the events at the library. Arriving to film a movie and ghost hunt, getting attacked by a ghost of an old woman, hiding under the desks, then eventually having to make a break for it while that book tornado formed in the center of the library.
We went back the next day, Jameson said. Everything was cleaned up, but one of the librarians said there’d been a bunch of destroyed books all over the ground floor on Saturday. I don’t think anyone saw the ghost other than us. The library was pretty empty, and I think the librarian was on break or something.
“Okay, then.” Jackie nodded. “And...it was definitely an old lady who, uh, attacked you?”
“Yes!” Chase emphasized. Clearly, hearing the story a second time did nothing to convince Jackie that the ghost was real. But he’d offered to help anyway, so there was that. “Well, it was started by that weird shadow.”
“What was this shadowy thing, anyway?” Marvin asked. “I didn’t see it.”
“Well you and Jameson were at the other end of the book aisle,” Chase said. “Schneep probably saw it. Right?” He looked over at Schneep, who merely shook his head. “What? But you were right next to me!”
“I was not looking where you were at first,” Schneep said. “If you saw a shadow, it was not there when I saw you staring at something.”
“Well, it was there.” Chase folded his arms. “It looked like a guy’s shadow, but there was no guy. But it was definitely there. I saw it before, in the park last week, but I’d kinda hit my head when I saw it the first time so I thought my brain was broken or something. But! Seeing it a second time means it was real! It pulled the ghost out of the bookcase and then touched her and made her glow green!”
“Maybe the shadow was coming from somewhere else,” Jackie suggested. “Um, what sort of shadow did it look like? I mean, who would it belong to?”
“I dunno. A guy.” Chase thought back to seeing it crouched on the bookshelf. “Not a kid. It was too tall. It laughed a little, and I think it sounded like a boy’s laugh? It had, like, the outline of hair, and that also looked like a boy’s hair.”
Jackie raised an eyebrow. “What’s a boy’s hair look like?”
“Short, I guess?” Chase said.
“Guys can have long hair,” Marvin said. “And girls can have short hair. Our aunt Linda has a best friend who lives with her named Sarah and she has short hair and likes to wear, like, suits to parties—”
“Ugh!” Chase interrupted. “I know guys and girls can have long and short hair! You get what I mean!”
So did the shadow make the ghost attack us? Jameson asked.
“I...don’t know,” Chase said slowly. “Maybe? It kind of...summoned her.”
“Maybe the shadow is another ghost?” Schneep suggested. “But it was one that was not as powerful, and could not make a body like she could. So it woke her up instead.”
“Is there anywhere the shadow could have...come from?” Jackie asked. “Like, if someone was on the balcony in the library and had a light shone on them, it could have looked like their shadow was down there.”
“No, we were away from the balcony when the shadow and ghost showed up,” Chase insisted. “The shadow couldn’t have come from anywhere. I know how light works, and it wasn’t at the right angle for a shadow to look like that!”
“Alright, alright, I believe you,” Jackie said, raising his hands.
“You do not believe us,” Schneep muttered.
Jackie shook his head. “No, I do. I don’t think you guys are making this up. I just...I-I don’t believe in ghosts.”
“I did not either, and then one started to throw books at me,” Schneep said.
Chase laughed.
“Why’d you come ghost hunting with us if you didn’t believe in ghosts?” Marvin asked, confused.
Schneep shrugged. “I-I think...I think I wanted to see what would happen. I, ahm, did not expect there to be one. But maybe it would be...interesting.”
Jackie sighed. “Well—”
There was a knock at the door.
No, it wasn’t really a knock. More like...a thud. A really loud thud against the front door. Everyone froze, looking towards the door. And again, there was a thud, this time followed by some scratching noises.
“Uh...that’s probably not your mom, is it?” Marvin asked. Jameson rolled his eyes and shoved him. Marvin shoved him back.
“It sounds like an animal or something,” Jackie said quietly, slowly standing up.
Chase frowned. “I don’t think there are any animals around here. I mean, the Hendersons have a cat, and Ms. Kennedy used to have this dog, but he ran away. And he wasn’t big enough to—”
Thud. The door shuddered. Then more scratching, the sound of claws digging into the wood.
“...do that,” Chase finished.
“Chase,” Jackie said in a low voice. “Does your mom keep anything in the house that’s big, heavy, and could be used as a weapon?”
“I-I think we keep the big mop in the closet down here.” Chase pointed. Unfortunately, the closet was really close to the front door. “And I have my baseball bat in my room.”
“Okay.” Jackie nodded. “You guys stay back.” He pulled out his phone and slowly walked forward. The others watched him go. Those who were sitting stood up and backed as far away from the front door as they could, while still being able to see it. Thud. Thud. Jackie stopped in his tracks, then took a deep breath, and looked through the small peephole in the wood. From where they were standing, the four boys barely heard him mutter, “What the hell?”
Thud. Jackie jumped backwards. He reached behind him, fumbling until he found the closet handle and opened it. He glanced down at his phone and dialed a number with one hand, while his other reached into the closet and blindly searched for something. While the phone rang, he looked back to the others. “Guys, go upstairs. It’ll be safe up there.” Then the other end of the call must have picked up, because he turned away and started talking. “Hi, yeah, I-I don’t know if I’m supposed to call you guys for this, but uh...I-I think there’s some sort of rabid animal trying to get into this house.”
Chase glanced back at the other three, his eyes wide. Marvin and Jameson looked over at him, their identical faces wearing identical shocked expressions. Schneep, meanwhile, had gone completely white, arms half-raised in front of him protectively. “Let’s go,” Chase whispered. He grabbed Schneep by the arm and ran for the stairs, pulling him along.
The two of them stopped at the top of the staircase. Here, there was a small landing-like area where you could look down at the living room. Marvin and Jameson hadn’t followed them. Instead, the two of them had run into the kitchen. Chase could see Jackie standing in the living room and staring into the dining room entrance. One hand held Mom’s mop, while the other still pressed the phone to his ear. “What are you two doing?!” he hissed. “Get up there!” Then he switched to the phone again. “Yeah, there are some kids here. Uh, four of them. Me? Uh, sixteen. Well, technically I—yeah. Yeah, the address is—”
Marvin and Jameson ran, sprinting up the stairs to the landing where Chase and Schneep were. As they dashed past the front hall, the thudding grew louder. The door shuddered in its frame with only the small lock holding it in place.
“What were you two doing?!” Chase half-shouted, repeating Jackie’s question.
“Getting stuff,” Marvin said simply.
Chase looked at what he was holding. “You didn’t need to get the pizza!” Was this really the time to claim the last slice of pepperoni?!
“No, look.” Marvin held up the plate with the slice. “This is important. I’m gonna—”
Thud! Thud! CRACK!
Something in the door broke. Chase wasn’t sure if it was the lock or the wood around it, but something broke and it flew open. Still on the first floor, Jackie gasped. He dropped his phone and held the mop up defensively in front of him.
A huge animal lunged into the house. It was a dog, but a dog bigger than any Chase had ever seen. Its head would come up to an adult’s shoulders, meaning it was as tall as the twins and taller than Chase and Schneep. Its fur was matted, shades of brown and black with the occasional white. It was built like a wolf, and yet, its ears were floppy, not the triangle shape that a wolf’s would be. And the tail was different: long and thin, almost snake-like as it dragged on the ground. The eyes glowed green, and drool dripped from teeth that looked way too large for the mouth. Besides him, Chase could feel Schneep shaking slightly, and he instinctively wrapped his arms protectively around him.
Jackie backed up, wide eyes locked on the impossible dog in front of him. The dog stared back at him. It growled, the muscles in its legs tensing.
And then Marvin leaned down from the top of the stairs and threw the slice of pizza right past the dog’s face. It splattered against the wall. The dog instantly looked towards it, and jumped to the side, sniffing the strange, food-smelling object. Jackie broke into a run, darting past it and over towards the stairs.
“Jesus fucking hell, what is that?!” He shouted, stopping on the landing by the others.
“It’s some kind of monster dog,” Marvin said, as if it was obvious. “Maybe it’s a werewolf? No, it’s not a full moon tonight.”
“Why are its eyes glowing?!” Jackie looked over the landing banister down at the monster dog, which was now licking the pizza off the wall.
“Well I guess there’s more weird stuff around than just ghosts.” Chase tried to laugh off the situation. “But, uh, I bet you believe us now, huh?”
“I...am considering it,” Jackie said slowly. He looked back at the others. “Anyway, are you guys alr—why do you have a knife?!”
Unlike Marvin, Jameson had not grabbed pizza from the kitchen. Instead, he was holding one of the big knives from Mom’s knife block. He looked down at it, shrugged, and signed something—which was pretty dangerous to do while holding a blade.
“I—okay? Fair enough?” Jackie shook his head. “Here, give me that. I think I’ll know how to use it better.” The two of them traded weapons, though Jameson didn’t look too happy about it. “You guys stay behind me, okay? We’re gonna back up. Maybe if we’re out of eyesight, it will lose interest.”
Slowly, the group stepped backwards down the hallway. Every single one of them kept their eyes locked on the monster dog, which was now sniffing around the entrance to the kitchen, until it disappeared from view. They carefully moved into Chase’s bedroom, with Jackie closing the door behind them. He kept one hand on the doorknob, keeping it closed, and the knife clenched in the other hand. Meanwhile, Chase suggested they start making a blanket rope, just in case they had to go out the window. The twins got right on that, but Chase himself just couldn’t. Schneep was still shaking, staring at the door, tensing every time there was a clatter from downstairs. Chase had to stay with him. He just...he just had to.
After a while, the sounds faded. The group was quiet, listening. But five minutes passed, and there was nothing. Jackie slowly opened the door and peered out. He walked into the hallway, and a minute later, shouted, “It’s gone!”
One by one, the four others filed out of the room, through the hall, and down the stairs. Jackie stood in the kitchen entrance, staring at open cabinet doors and spilled food all over the floor. He looked back at the others. “Are you guys alright?”
“Holy shit, it destroyed your kitchen!” Marvin shouted. “I knew it was gonna look for food!”
“We’re alright,” Chase said. “Just, uh...scared. I mean, I’m not scared, duh, but everyone else is.” Schneep was holding tightly onto his arm. He patted his hand awkwardly.
Jackie smiled a little. “Of course.” Then he sighed. “Uh...I called the police. They might be here any minute. What...what do we say?”
“Well. If you didn’t believe us about the ghost, they’re definitely not gonna believe us about the fucking huge dog,” Marvin said.
“Right.” Jackie sighed. “I guess we should just say we didn’t get a good look at it. Except that it was big. We all ran up the stairs before it broke in.” He paused. “I should call your parents. Explain what happened and that we’re alright. But then...what do we do about this?”
Silence. Then, Jameson cleared his throat. He signed something. “JJ thinks we should go back to the library,” Marvin translated. “Because we might be able to figure out what’s going on.”
“Yeah...yeah!” Chase nodded. “Maybe we can get that ghost and ask her some questions. Maybe she knows what the dog was all about!” He nodded faster. “Okay, so tomorrow—”
“Oh, we can’t do it tomorrow,” Marvin interrupted. “We’re going to the animal shelter to pet cats and hang out all day.” Jameson nodded, backing Marvin up. “What about the day after?”
“Sorry, I-I can’t,” Jackie said. “I’m not letting you guys go alone. But the day after tomorrow is, uh...my birthday. And my family’s coming over.”
“Oh, happy birthday,” Chase said. Schneep and Marvin echoed his words, and Jameson signed the same.
Jackie grinned a bit. “Thanks, little guys. So...what about Thursday, then?”
The others exchanged glances. “Uh, that’ll work, I guess,” Chase said.
“Great.” Jackie looked back at the ruined kitchen. He sighed. “I guess I’ll call your parents and then clean this up for your mom. Until the police show up, anyway. What do you guys want to do?”
Nobody said anything. Then, “I want to forget about this,” Schneep mumbled. “Can we play the video game again? And...forget about this?”
“Yeah, we can do that,” Chase said quietly. “What about you two?”
Marvin and Jameson looked at each other, then both nodded. “Sounds good,” Marvin said.
“Okay, then.”
“You guys go do that,” Jackie said. “Don’t worry about this for the rest of the night. I’ll talk to everyone.”
And so, the four of them played video games through all the chaos that followed, slowly relaxing. Until the Jacksons’ parents came to pick them up and Chase’s mom insisted the other two go to bed.
Surprisingly, they fell asleep quickly, drifting off into a dreamless darkness.
#jacksepticeye#jacksepticeye fanfiction#jacksepticegos#septic egos#jacksepticeye au#septic egos au#chase brody#dr schneeplestein#jackieboy man#marvin the magnificent#jameson jackson#brigid writes fanfiction#pnptau
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Commanding Loki (just kind of happens)
Summary: You’re not really sure how it happens but you begin commanding Loki, the God of Mischief, around. To everyone’s shock, he happily obliges to your commands.
The first time you do it in front of the Avengers they all kind of stop in shock.
"Loki, get me a soda before you sit down." You told rather than asked the God.
You were too busy looking at a tablet Tony had lent you to see him stop in his tracks. He glared at the Avengers looking at him, ready to attack him as if he was thinking about attacking you for giving him an order. They weren't wrong but only because you did it in front of everyone. Probably.
He got you a soda and sits next to you, rolling his eyes at your nonchalant thanks.
The next time it happened was kind of a life or death situation.
"Loki, leave the room right now and calm yourself," You checked Thor's pulse through the gushing blood which made him slippery as an eel, "You either calm yourself and I’ll let you back in or you can sit out there like a petulant child. Go."
Natasha looked at you as if you were crazy, her hands pressing a t-shirt to Thor’s wound tightly. Loki heeded her no mind though and did as you told him.
He was welcomed back within 15 minutes.
Next, you do it more to push boundaries because Natasha had a conversation with you after Thor's fiasco. She's finds it quite funny that he obeys you like it's second nature but if anyone else dared do it he wouldn't hesitate to threaten their life. Trust me, Tony had wanted to test his boundaries and tried to do it too. Needless to say, Tony wouldn't be doing it again any time soon, he was still pissy some very expensive pieces of furniture got destroyed.
So one day while you and Loki are hanging out with Natasha, like you all consistently do because you three enjoy silence but companionship at the same time. You look across at Nat and grin, making sure Loki doesn't see it and commence your plan.
"Loki," Loki looks up from his book on midguardian foods newly introduced from 1996 to 2010, a questioning frown on his face, "Pass me the remote."
It's simple enough, nothing too strenuous. Yet.
"You have two perfectly functioning arms." Loki mutters but grabs the remote and gives it to you. You give him a genuine smile and you can see he has gone soft in the eyes before he looks at his book again.
You glance at Nat with raised brows, she looks away with a smirk as you turn on the TV. Flicking through channels you finally settle on reruns of Stranger Things. Natasha gets interested and you kind of watch but mostly you're thinking about commanding Loki to do something else but what? Loki keeps looking at his book but you see him glancing up often to watch the show too.
"Hey, Cowboy," Loki growls at the name, it had come up when Thor told you he used to call him a cow for his horns, "Don’t sit like that you'll get scoliosis....if a God can get that." Loki who had slouched forwards blinked at you and sat up straight in shock from the bad posture. When you see him glower at the TV you smile, he's probably cursing midguardians for ruining his good posture.
"Thanks." You whisper.
Loki hums carelessly and puts his book down to instead watch the show. Natasha coughs into her hand (a hidden laugh, you knew Nat too well), Loki eyes her suspiciously, looks at you, then focuses back on the TV. You force yourself, with great resolve might you add, to not laugh. You let things settle again before you try the ultimate command.
"Ugh." You start, rolling your right shoulder around and poking at it as if it hurts. You're literally about to tell Loki to massage it for you but you’re struck by paralyzing shock. Loki had noticed your 'discomfort' and moved closer to you. Lifting his hands towards your shoulder he stopped and looked at you with a tilted brow, asking consent.
Aww how sweet.
You nodded and shifted so he had better access to your back. One hand landed between your shoulders on your back and the other pinching the area where your shoulder met your arm and began massaging.
Shocked you let him staring at the TV but not knowing what is going on on the show. Loki and you had touched before so it's not so out in the left field that you're concerned but he was massaging you in front of Natasha. Your thoughts turned to mush as he pushes and pulls your body so he could access all of your back and starts massaging your entire back. You couldn't help the little whimpers and soft moans of delight. Not only was this man a God but he was literally gifted God like hands, unfair!
After letting out another whimper Loki stopped. You felt him shift back to his original spot and so you did too. Glancing at him you saw a hint of flushed cheeks as he stared at the TV distantly. Natasha was outright staring at him with both eyebrows raised to her hairline, it looked like.
Loki cleared his throat and left with an offhand excuse.
Once Loki left the area Natasha's eyes fell onto you. She smirked lecherously but said nothing about what had just happened. Turning her attention back to the show when you shrugged your shoulders, completely flustered.
She asks, "So like, I don’t doubt Will is going to be found but does Barbara make it?"
You smile and settle into the couch, "You'll find out in a few episodes."
Natasha groans and you laugh. You know she hates not knowing but if she's truly desperate she can look it up on Google or ask Jarvis.
The next time you command him it's another crisis.
In short, Thor and Loki are arguing, both clearly in a ferocious rage in the kitchen. All the team is there to experience it this time too.
"No, Thor, I cannot simply understand why you would defend those inept idiots you call friends. If you think they're in the right you’re more brainless than I thought!" Loki yells at Thor who now looks like a kicked puppy and your motherly instincts kick in.
"Hey!" Loki looks at you shocked, this is the highest he's ever heard your voice, and probably the angriest too because you just don’t get mad. You have the patience of a Buddha God, Tony likes to say.
"You apologize to him right now, then you will listen to what your brother has say, and if you interrupt him I will show you just how minuscule a God can be to a non believer."
The entire kitchen is silent. Tony looks like he wants to flee the area, he's been on your angry side once before. Steve is practically engraving the table with his eyes. Natasha shrugs and continues eating her meal, the utensils clipping the plate the only noise in the room.
Loki looks at Thor and raises a brow. Thor, still looking at you, swallows and begins to talk, focusing on his brother again.
"Im trying to learn but I don’t know how to stay neutral between your feelings and my friend's-"
Loki opens his mouth but slams it shut when you snap your fingers.
"-i do not want to offend anyone but every choice i make I offend you and I’m sorry brother, I truly am. What can I do to amend things between us?"
Loki glances at you to see if he may talk now. At your nod he says, "Start by supporting your brother sometimes. I don't ask that you stand behind every argument between your friends and I but you never fail to support them, it seems. You can't please everybody Thor, and you can't stay neutral forever, at some point you have to realize that you have to pick a side and who's side."
Thor has lost to kicked puppy look but he now frowns and nods, staring at the floor with guilt. Loki's hand comes up, hesitates, then he places it on Thor's arm for a second and swiftly leaves.
When no one moves for a few seconds you clear your throat and they all go back to whatever they were doing before the argument escalated out of proportion, you included.
You realize you may have tiptoed the line of being fair with that last command so you let it rest for awhile, give Loki some space. He of course notices your avoidance because Tony had asked you what was up between you both, stating that the God had asked him if anything was bothering you. Usually Loki came to you with his concerns, not being the type of person to talk behind someone’s back.
You sigh and tell Tony you’re fine, that you’ll talk to him. So you head out from Tony’s lab and search for Loki. He isn’t in the living room, kitchen, or even his own bedroom. You remember him once stating that he likes read on the roof sometimes, Tony had build Loki a garden up on the roof at one point since Loki clearly missed the garden from home, Asgard. A small gesture but a true turning point for both Tony and Loki’s relationship you think.
Walking out on the roof you don’t see Loki in the garden so you murmur a few expletives and make your way back to the door when a voice calls out your name. You follow the sound and find Loki hidden on a corner of the roof, sitting on the edge of the building.
Walking up behind him you ask, “Can we talk?”
“You’ve never asked before, don’t see why you’d start now.” Loki says, no contempt in his voice though, it’s just very...neutral.
You force out a small laugh, hearing your own tenseness in it, “Ya, about that..”
You sit next to Loki letting your legs dangle over the ledge like Loki does now. His legs kick every once in awhile giving him an almost childlike appearance.
“First off, I’m sorry.”
“For what?” Loki looks at you.
“I was out of line the other day with you and Thor. Not just then I’ve been, well, commanding you to do things for me and that’s...it’s not...right?” You finish lamely, your face a big grimace but you look Loki in the eyes when you apologize.
“That’s why you’ve been avoiding me?” Loki says with mirth lingering in his words.
“Well, ya, is there some other reason I should have?” You squint at him suspiciously.
“No.”
Loki looks at you with an innocent look on his face, which you know is pure bullshit, but you let it slide. Shaking your head with a smile you then look out across the open skyline below you.
“Apology accepted.” Loki says after some time has past. Your shoulders, which had tensed involuntarily, now relax.
You don’t react, well more like force yourself not to, when you feel Loki’s hand come to rest atop yours which had been supporting you on the ledge. Loki lets his hand rest there before he gets more confident and intertwines both of your fingers. You smile, finally looking at Loki who is already staring at you brazenly.
“Kiss me.”
“What?”
“Did I fucking stutter?”
Loki smirks then leans in, his left hand coming to cradle your head at your jaw and kisses you. At first softly, as if testing the waters, then begins to put more passion behind it as you lean into him. His tongue gently swipes across your bottom lip and you open your mouth to let him explore.
If you thought this man had God like hands....
When you’re both breathless you part but keep your faces close together. Your eyes roam over his face, noting how young he looks right now, how vulnerable, and bite your lip. Loki’s eyes drop to your lips and uses a thumb to pull your lip from your teeth lest you bruise them more. “Don’t bite them, it is my job to bruise them.” Loki says breathlessly.
Much later, when it’s dark out, you both come back into the tower and make your way to the living room. The first person you see is Natasha who, legit, smiles at the look of you two. Tony who notices Nat smiling looks where she’s looking and whistles at the two of you who decide to share a love seat.
“Shut up.” You command the two of them.
You were sure the both of you made a pretty funny picture. Your hair was most likely tousled, too much so to just be from the wind, and Loki’s lips were nearly purple with bruising so no doubt yours were any less. Not to mention the both of you were too incredibly happy, which ya you being happy is normal but it was almost an alarming amount of giddiness and Loki doesn’t normally show his emotions so openly like this.
Tony smirks, raises a brow and points the remote at the TV. “Stranger Things?”
You, very much flustered, clear your throat and say yes.
#loki x reader#loki odinson#loki#reader insert#one shot#avengers#tony stark#natasha romanov#my writing#dudes i literally had this thought pop in my head while out eating dinner with my family for mothers day#and i was constantly picking up and putting down my phone to write it all in my notes#like i always have the best ideas while out doing something or when people need my attention gdi#but enjoy#commanding loki (just kinda happens)
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Ok but, more detailed thoughts on SM149 JN111 below the cut!
Like HOLY COW did they not waste time at ALL with finding Mohn, I ended up loving that approach so much! The episode starts with Research Fellow trio being informed of some mysterious Pokémon found in the Crown Tundra (I guess the japanese name is The Snowfield of the Crown, localised name is kinda easier to say), and after Lilie, Lusamine and Gladio end up finding Mohn in a state of memory loss, we find out that he's been living WITH A FRICKING UTSUROID!! Shiny even! And like, all this time, he thought it was Lilie. Because Utsuroid made him see it as such. Oh god, this Utsuroid... ;-;
And like, once again I wasn't spoiled on anything regarding the ep, so when Satoshi, Gou and Koharu hear about a witness talk about a white Pokémon (the rest I was unable to understand, only white description), I thought it was gonna be Calyrex or Glastier lol. But nooooo, it's shiny Utsuroid. Which honestly fits way better and fits with the whole "Ultra Beasts reside in The Crown Tundra in Galar in the games as well" idea i wanted the anime to adapt asjkfhshkf. And y'know, this is as good as any.
BUT OH GOSH MY HEART, I collapsed real hard when Lilie played Mother and Daughter theme from Alola at the start, and then it became a theme in the ep, and like, props to the animators making the piano play accurate as heck.
And can we talk about how fricking well Lusamine's role was done in the ep, like Lilie was the true protag of the ep, and Gladio did some really nice stuff in the ep too, but LUSAMINE MY DEAR, she was.... oh god the shock she had when Mohn didn't recognize her was so heart-breaking, it's EXACTLY what I wanted, and yet I broke down again because ohgod they nailed that face, they fricking nailed it. You bet I'll be trying to gif it askhsfjhsf. As many other scenes jkahsfjh.
And like, the whole situation Mohn was living in was really sad, because Utsuroid ended up hiding every single mirror in the house, so its true from wouldn't reflect on it, and also to prevent Mohn from remembering and abandoning it? Like, it seems pretty twisted, but in the end, this shiny Utsuroid, who Mohn actually called Lilie, ended up being a kind one who just wanted to protect Mohn. ALSO THEY REALLY WENT AND MADE THE POPULAR FAN THEORY OF LILIE BEING UTSUROID A PLOT POINT WHAT THE HELL-
And the way I screamed so happily at Pikachu coming to save Lilie, Satoshi shouting Iron Tail, sakjsfjhsfjsfhfsjsf I LOVE THEIR FRIENDSHIP SO MUCH AND I JUST, ooooh I felt so home, I felt like I was watching Sun & Moon, I enjoyed the ride of the ep so fricking much.
And and and and and when Mohn remembers the kids again, OH MY FRICKING, Lusamine's face was so, UUUGH it was so good, her beloved husband finally remembered her and she was so, you could tell she was releaved and so fricking happy. I'm happy for her too. We finally have an Aether Family, happy with all four members. Oh, sorry. FIVE!
They end up being thankful for Lilie the Utsuroid for taking care of Mohn all these years, for saving him from the accident aftermath, and they catch it in a Beast Ball. And I just.... fricking hell, LILIE WAS TRAUMATIZED BY UTSUROID, and now she befriended the one who took care of Mohn, her father, all these years, and took her form in an illusion.
And I I I I I i, hhhnnngghh there was still a lot of dialogue I need subtitles for but this was THE ABSOLUTE BEST episode JN has delivered so far. The best. Why do Aether Family eps rock so hard man-
Yeeeh Shiron didn't evolve but it isn't on a must-happen list for me, just a would-like-for-it-to-happen list, and it can still happen, but I don't mind, it really didn't fit into the episode plot and it was SO fricking beautifully crafted that yes. This is now SM149 and Sun & Moon never ended what do you mean it's been two and a half years since SM146-
#aleira watches jn#pokemon#pokeani#anipoke#pokemon jn#jn111#post commentary#discussions#i don't talk about next ep spoilers in this post btw#but know i am hyped#this ain't a well crafted post and more of a ramble collection but I needed to shout
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out to lunch
Pairing: cooking show chef!xiaojun x personal assistant!reader
Themes: smut
Word count: 2.5k
Summary: You come over to the kitchen set of Xiaojun’s cooking show to tell him you managed to get him what he had always dreamed of. However, once you reveal the big news, you discover his priorities have changed, and right now, the only thing he wants to do is you.
Warnings: dirty talk | fingering | kitchen set sex | unprotected sex | creampie | Xiaojun’s inner diva is showing |
A/N support WayV lol | writing this for neosmutcollective mini wayv event
Xiaojun was utterly immersed in his world. Though it was already late at night, he was still behind the kitchen counter, chopping ingredients with his favorite knife. Right now, Xiaojun was in his element, oozing precision and determination to perfect his new recipe, and it somewhat felt like a sin to interrupt him.
You had big news to deliver, though. Having heard you out, Xiaojun would surely forgive you for your disruption. He had to. After all, you just managed to get him that cooking book contract he had always dreamed of.
Ever since you two had started working together, it was your goal to make Xiaojun a published author. Though he already owned three restaurants and starred in his own cooking show, Xiaojun was insatiable. The more fame and recognition he got, it was never enough.
You cleared your throat to obtain his attention, but it didn’t quite pull him out of his trance, so you decided to give him an extra minute.
Xiaojun looked incredibly attractive in his own habitat. In his white uniform and ridiculously big chef hat, Xiaojun looked like a whole damn Michelin three-star dish. No wonder he kept beating his viewing records with each new episode. People all across the country swooned over his culinary talent, incredible charisma, and breathtaking looks.
Having approached the kitchen counter, you knocked on the marble surface in hopes of obtaining his attention.
“Earth to Xiaojun,” you softly spoke, looking at his face. Apparently, the timing couldn’t have been worse as Xiaojun dropped his knife on the cutting board and swung it onto the floor, making a huge mess.
“What do you want!? Don’t you see I’m busy!?” Xiaojun barked before he turned around to get a clean set of kitchen utensils. “Get lost. I don’t want to talk to you,” he added, waving his hand at you, trying to chase you out of the kitchen space.
“Ugh, for the love of God, Xiaojun! How many times have we had this conversation? That diva tone doesn’t work on me,” you answered firmly, staring into his eyes, challenging him. His gaze was intense, his jaw was tensed, but you just smiled at him, ignoring his shenanigans altogether. It wasn’t the first time he lashed out at you, and you knew how to handle him.
“Okay, fine. What is it?” Xiaojun huffed, giving in. With his arms folded across his chest, he tapped his foot against the floor, impatiently waiting for the news.
“I got you that book offer. You’re gonna be a published author,” you exclaimed, ready to jump up and down in joy. However, Xiaojun didn’t seem to be particularly excited. “What’s the matter? Isn’t it what you’ve always wanted? I don’t get it,” you spoke, creasing your eyebrow in confusion, trying to read his bizarre expression.
Xiaojun seemed indifferent at best.
“Cancel it. Undo it. I won’t write it,” Xiaojun replied before he proceeded back to his previous task. It wasn’t wise to disturb him now, so you waited until all vegetables were neatly cubed and thrown into a bowl.
“Can you tell me what’s going on? I don’t understand. I thought you’ve always wanted it,” you inquired, trying a much calmer approach. Xiaojun didn’t use his knife now, but he was still holding it, and it wouldn’t be the first time someone earned a cut during a heated argument in the kitchen.
“I have,” Xiaojun replied with a deep sigh as he poured the chicken broth over the vegetables. “But it gets tiring, you know…” he added, as he took off his chef hat and threw it on the countertop, running his hand through his hair. “Everything is happening too fast. I thought I wanted it, but now, when I actually live that life, I realized I am not cut out for this.”
It was heart-breaking to listen to it. You two had been working very hard to get Xiaojun where he is right now, only to come to a conclusion it’s all wrong. Fame was a heavy cross to bear, and Xiaojun was slowly stumbling under its weight.
“Don’t tell me you want to quit,” you whispered, anxious to know the answer. Xiaojun’s eyes were trained on you, and you could see how tired he was. “How about you take it easy from now on instead of quitting it all together? It would be a shame to quit right at the finishing line,” you reasoned, hoping Xiaojun would consider it.
“I don’t know.”
“Let’s talk about it, okay?” you interjected before Xiaojun would impulsively ruin his career. “We’ve got only three more episodes to shoot. I could put you on hiatus until you decide you want to continue with another season. In the meantime, you could work on the cooking book at your own pace. Probably, I will make you record some cooking content on social media to keep you circulating on the web, so people won’t forget you. Except for that, your schedule would be clear to focus on whatever you need to focus on.”
Silence.
Xiaojun was staring at his chef hat, pondering your damn good points. When you put it like that, it was hard to say no. Besides, he had a feeling you would talk back instantly if he found faults in your argumentation.
Seconds passed without Xiaojun’s response. You were his voice of reason; he had to listen to you. Besides, not only was his career on the line. If he actually quitted, your superior would murder you. Xiaojun was the cash cow of the company; they couldn’t afford to lose him. He was at their rising star.
“Why do you always know what to say?” Xiaojun rhetorically asked, and you beamed, ready to grace him with an answer.
“I’m really good at my job,” you pointed out proudly. Thanks to your impeccable management and problem-solving capabilities, you managed to help Xiaojun rise to the top. “And also, I care about you. Sometimes, you’re a pain in the ass, but after all, you’re a good person. You are my friend, and I want you to be happy.”
“Fine, let’s do it your way. But we’re not shooting another season until I say so,” Xiaojun caved, smiling brightly at you. “You know what I really want to do, though?” He challenged as he rested his elbow on the counter, straightening his back, trying to appear taller and overall more confident.
His voice was quiet, and it suspiciously sounded as if he told “you.”
Shaking your head, you asked, “what?”
Xiaojun felt a sudden wave of confidence rush through him before he repeated himself clearly. No, there was no shred of doubt. You heard him loud and clear. Confidently, Xiaojun admitted that he really want to do was you.
“You seriously think I haven’t noticed the way you look at me?” Xiaojun spoke in a somewhat accusing tone, eyeing you from head to toe before he took a cautious step toward you. Intimidated, you took a step backward, and that timid action made Xiaojun smirk.
He knew exactly what type of effect he had on you. All memories of lingering glances you had stolen of him when you had believed he hadn’t been looking came back rushing to you. You weren’t as sly and discreet as you thought you were.
“It really flatters me,” Xiaojun teased with a smug smile. “Don’t deny it, and come here,” he urged, spreading his arms, waiting for you to run into him.
At first, you were sure Xiaojun was just messing with your head. You believed he was teasing you. You imagined him flick your forehead if you walked into his personal space. It was obvious he was mocking you. There was no way in hell that he wanted you the way you wanted him. You must’ve been seeing things.
“Jesus, woman! Hurry the fuck up,” Xiaojun warned you, losing his patience. “If you’re not coming here, I am coming there,” he added, giving you one last chance for a change of heart. “Screw it,” he cursed, surging forward, trapping you in his tight embrace.
His actions spoke louder than words. All your previous thoughts were gone; Xiaojun wouldn’t have bothered this much to pull a prank on you. He was genuine. Xiaojun held you still in his arms, waiting for you to make a move. He would never try anything without your permission, regardless of how delicious your lips looked.
“Kiss me,” he ordered, and you rushed, smashing your lips against his in a passionate kiss. It was everything you imagined it to be, but tenfold better. You had fantasized about his moment plenty of times, and weirdly enough, Xiaojun’s mouth somehow felt both soft and rough at the same time. “Now, we’re talking.”
You two completely lost it. Hands were running on your bodies as you engaged in a heated moment, relieving your much maddening frustration. It felt amazing, and you wished you could carry on until you both lose all your energy.
“Let’s go to my place,” you mumbled once you pulled away. Xiaojun still held you pressed against him as he waited for you to elaborate, being painfully clueless to your ulterior motive. “It’s much closer from here than yours,” you added, and Xiaojun only smiled dumbly, waiting for you to word your request in an even more ridiculous way.
“Why bother going anywhere when I can have you here?” Xiaojun playfully announced, giggling as his gaze shifted from your gorgeous eyes to the countertop. Almost instantly you realized what his crazy proposition was. Did you really want your first time with him to be on the kitchen island inside the cooking show set? It would be a blatant lie if you said you had never considered this.
“Fuck me then,” you urged, giving Xiaojun permission to ruin you right there.
Xiaojun didn’t waste any time. In an instant, he wrapped his arms around your thighs as he picked you up and gently sat down on the countertop. Except for your pencil skirt, your legs were bare, so you let out a slight hiss once you felt the cold marble against your skin.
Biting your lips, you spread your legs, letting Xiaojun stand right between them.
“You have no idea how many times I’ve thought about fucking you here,” Xiaojun confessed before he leaned forward, stealing another desperate kiss. “You remember that time when we fought over the Oreo cake? I was so hard back then. I wanted to bend you over the counter so bad. I almost didn’t hold myself back.”
“You should’ve gone for it,” you whispered as you remembered that quarrel. That night Xiaojun had been the star of your fantasies when you used your vibrating friend to get yourself off. “I was so horny then. Almost as horny as right now,” you added, pulling him by his funny black tie, melting into yet another kiss.
Xiaojun was getting impatient. It was nice, but it wasn’t enough for him. Having untangled the knot of his apron, he yanked it off his hips, throwing it over his shoulder.
“I want to feel you so bad,” he murmured as he slid his fingers under your skirt, pulling your panties down your legs. “Let me prep you up,” Xiaojun uttered when his digits gently fondled your folds, gliding his knuckle inside of you. The moment you felt him, you let out a quiet moan, enjoying his little ministrations.
Xiaojun knew how to please a woman. He curled his fingers inside of you, stretching you out for his length. With your eyes shut closed, you focused on your pleasure, letting Xiaojun spoil you rotten. Though it was just mere petting, it felt nice as hell. He was getting you ready for his cock, and you basked in simple delight.
“Enough of that; I want you to fuck me now,” you kindly spoke, wrapping your palm around his wrist. “Please,” you added when you noticed how hesitant Xiaojun was of letting go. He planned on making you come first before properly fucking you with his cock, but since you asked him nicely, he decided to give you exactly what you wanted. Though he’d love to tease you some more, your pleading tone seemed to do the thing.
Swiftly, he yanked down his pants, revealing his member. It was standing proud, and you looked down at it, admiring it. Without any doubt, Xiaojun was to make your day.
As much as you wanted to return the favor, Xiaojun didn’t let you. Impatiently, he gave himself a few strokes before he aligned his cock with your entrance, rubbing its tip against your folds. Slowly, he pushed his hard length inside of you, making you groan.
Your grip on the edge of the countertop tightened as Xiaojun filled you up with his erection. At first, Xiaojun maintained a slow and steady rhythm. However, as you kept moaning his name and encouraging him to go faster, his thrusts became more rapid. Quickly, Xiaojun snapped his hips, finding your sweet spot in record time.
“Holy shit,” you exclaimed, feeling the knot inside of you tighten. You were moments away from your peak. Xiaojun’s cock stroked all the right places, pushing you off the edge. “Fuck, I am coming,” you shouted, kicking your head backward, welcoming the bliss that ripped through you.
When you were slowly descending back on Earth, Xiaojun kept chasing his release.
You could feel him throb inside of you. Then, an idea crossed your mind. Until now, it was Xiaojun who did all the work, so the least you could do was to encourage him to fill you up, to talk him through his orgasm.
“You fill me up so well. I came on your cock, and you’re still rock-hard. Do you want me to come again?” You complimented him, spilling filth. Though you weren’t sure if Xiaojun would be into dirty talk, you were certain he was eating it all up. Xiaojun was moaning your name as he snapped his hips, falling out of his even rhythm.
Xiaojun was near. His grip on your thighs tightened as he pounded inside of you, being only a few strokes away from his sweet bliss.
“Come inside of me,” you urged him. It was all it took to make him reach his peak. With a choked grunt, Xiaojun came, buckling his hips as he painted your walls with his release.
You remained silent as Xiaojun breathed heavily, trying to come back to his senses.
“If we’re ever doing it, here, again, I want you to spank me with this,” you commented as you reached for the spatula that sat on the other side of the counter. Xiaojun smirked upon seeing the kitchen utensil, tempted to try it out soon.
However, on second thought, tonight was just good as any other day.
“How about we take it with us over to your place,” Xiaojun proposed, and you cocked your eyebrow, excited to hear his suggestion. “Let’s get you cleaned up first,” he added as he bent down to pick up his apron. His release was dripping down your thighs, so he wiped it off with the fabric, looking rather pleased by the fact that you let him come inside of you.
“That sounds like a plan.”
#xiaojun smut#wayv smut#neosmutcollective#nsckickback#nct smut#xiaojun drabble#wayv drabble#nct drabble
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mcd garroth + laurance headcanons for the sake of me posting something while working on my long-ass post, also happy birthday blaze ily,
garroth - total momma’s boy. seems obvious, but it’s true -- back in o’khasis, he was practically glued to the side of zianna. whenever she had to leave for a few days when he was younger, he’d cry if he couldn’t go with her. when he left for the guard academy, he wrote to zianna on a daily basis. to put it simply, he had separation anxiety. the hardest thing about faking his death was not being able to see or talk to his mother. - incredible piano player. his father made him take lessons when he was younger for quite a few years, but he was naturally very good at it. he never mentions this skill to anyone. while they were at malachi’s castle and were looking for materials before they left, garroth stumbled upon an old piano and played something. he got really into it, and laurance ended up stumbling on him playing. he made laurance swear to never tell anyone about it. - when garroth was around eight or nine, his stutter was so bad that garte didn’t let him speak in public or around any people other than the family out of shame. vylad and zianna used to help garroth with his stutter.
- garroth is very sensitive to the saying “oh my irene.” growing up in the ro’meave house, it was taboo to use irene’s name in vein. or anywhere in o’khasis, really. nowadays he’s still very caustious whenever he says it, because he thinks that someone is going to yell at him. - horrified of getting hurt. back during the days of training in the guard academy, while he was very good with technique and fighting itself, he had a very bad flinching problem. overall, for the longest time, wounds and pain made garroth very uncomfortable. because of this fear of getting hurt, he has a bit of a stubble because of the one time he hurt himself while shaving. - 6′4, because 6′11 is unbelievably tall and i honestly don’t even think that it’s canon? s’yeah. he seems 6′4 to me.
- garroth often sees new things and (internally) has this very child-like wonder response. he was sheltered for the entirety of his childhood and teenagehood. and after the guard academy, he stayed put in the same village for 5 years -- so he hasn’t experienced very much. he often wants to ask dozens of questions, but because of his shyness, he tends to just observe anything new very closely. which leads me to my next headcanon,
- because of o’khasis’ intolerance to many things, he was not very commonly exposed to magick’s users. the first magicks user that he directly met would be zoey, and he was very nervous when talking to her the first time he met her. when garroth gets to know her more, she catches on that he’s curious about a lot of things, and offers to tell him about things. he declines, and he regrets that decision to this day.
- as stated before, o’khasis isn’t very tolerable of things, which caused garroth to develop incredibly bad internalized homophobia. when aphmau comes along, he gets a very strong desire to protect her (little do we know, this strong desire comes from his connection with esmund) and confuses it for/tries to convince himself that it’s romantic love. it is in fact love, just platonic. so basically, this man’s gay as hell.
- garroth has more freckles than any other ro’meave family member. he’s mildly insecure about his freckles, seeing them as a ‘childish’ trait, which is why he wasn’t very bothered with the idea of hiding his face with his helmet.
- his hair is super curly. it used to be more tame, but as he got older, it got more curly. it’s usually a mess because he doesn’t know how to take care of it, but it somehow looks hot as hell. (no homo ofc.)
- garroth is allergic to blueberries.
- raven was garroth’s first genuine connection since he left o’khasis. zenix was his second. he loves raven a lot, and hates that he can’t see him as often as he’d like to.
- garroth is a total cat person. don’t get me wrong, he loves dogs, but if he were to choose between having one or the other, he’d choose to have a cat. he had a pet cat when he was little that he still thinks about a lot. (probably named sprinkles, just for the hell of it.)
- because of how he grew up, garroth’s actually a very picky eater. while he’d never admit it to himself or anyone else, he misses the more “rich-people” food he was spoiled with.
- garroth isn’t actually that stupid, when he first arrived at pheonix drop, he had a name in mind that he wanted to go by (to better hide his identity). however, when his name was asked by someone, he panicked and “garroth” accidently slipped. he beat himself up for the longest time after that. the only reason he finally let go is because no one had ever pointed out how/seemed suspicious he had the same name as the deceased first-born son of o’khasis.
laurance - his hair grows decently quick, so even after cadenza cut it for him, it only took about 4 months for it to grow back just past his shoulders. he prefers it having some length to it anyways, and usually ties is back into a ponytail. after the irene dimension, he would let nekoette braid his hair. - has a very lanky body type. naturally has long limbs, and would often get called a ‘stick’ when he was younger. he’s about 5′11. but don’t confuse his thinner stature for weakness, he matches garroth’s strength easily.
- bi icon. fuck that “you were my first kiss” bullshit he gives aphmau, the list exists and while it’s stupid and weird, according to it, garroth was his first kiss. which is fuckin funny as hell if you think about it.
- laurance is very good with animals. more so rodents and smaller creatures, like squirrels, birds, rabbits, etc. cadenza was convinced that laurance could talk to animals for the longest time. he even had this little mouse that would pop in his house. however, on the contrary, larger animals -- not so much. he’s shit with horses and cows, especially.
- incredible singer. has serenaded aphmau on multiple occasions, and has even gotten her to sing along with him from time to time. he sang for malachi to help him fall asleep every night since the day they met him. this caused him to start singing for levin at night as well. when laurance saw malachi again after the 15 year jump, within the first few days of his return, malachi asked for laurance to sing for him again just like he used to. which brings me to my next headacanon,
- laurance saw malachi as his own child, and treated him as such. they were very close, and malachi was the most heartbroken over laurance’s disappearance since he saw him very much as a father. it wasn’t that laurance favored malachi over levin that created this bond, it was the fact that laurance first-hand saw a child in need of a home and someone to love him, and it reminded him of when he was small.
- he’s a sucker for bets. gambles, wages, anything like that. while he’s not directly a gambler, if someone offers he’s sure to accept. he’s a risk-taker, and ends up getting really into it. this also branches into his competitive behavior. he’ll be really upset and possibly a bit petty if he loses. why else do you think he still hadn’t given castor the 5 dollars he owes him?
- slingshot master. you give this motherfucker a slingshot he can kill someone with his impeccable aim. he’s also very good with a bow and arrow or any sort of projectile, but he’s the best with a slingshot. when he was younger, he hand-made slingshots from materials that he’d find around the forest.
- speaking of the forest, laurance is a very nature-loving soul. when he moved to meteli when he was adopted, he’d often go and explore the forests nearby. he and cadenza would use their imaginations and play all sorts of games. laurance and her especially loved to climb trees, and would jump from branch to branch. this helped laurance become very flexible. this is also how he met sasha, she was sitting in his favorite tree one day and they just hit it off from there.
- after he was rescued from the nether, laurance frequently had nightmares that would lead into sleep paralysis episodes. the first time it happened garroth had been looking over him (since this was around the time when laurance first got back and garroth had allowed aphmau to go do her lord tasks while he watched over him) and when he had the ability to move and speak again, he started freaking out. garroth had to calm him down and assure laurance that he’d talk to zoey about what happened. garroth and zoey are the only ones that know of laurance’s sleep paralysis, mainly because he didn’t want to worry aphmau or anyone else. zoey often gave him ways to cope with it. it didn’t happen every night, but it did occur at least 5-6 times a month. his sleep paralysis stopped the moment he entered the nether for the second time.
- the first time laurance heard he’d made the list for the jury of nine, he felt honoured. when he was oblivious to how corrupt it was, he saw it as a huge opportunity. after learning about it’s true nature, he was still glad that he’d made the list -- because him being on the list prevented another person from risking being on the list and being chosen to be apart of the jury.
- yes, laurance can cook very will in this universe as well. it’s not that he was taught, it’s more that he can look at ingredients and just throw them together to make great combinations. zoey also taught him a few things.
- laurance does not know his real birthday. malachi does not remember his. since cadenza had “given” laurance a birthday, he offered to let malachi share his unofficial birthday with him. malachi accepted.
garroth + laurance
- laurance began referring to garroth as “pretty boy” after seeing his face. he continued to call him that for the first month of their friendship. garroth hated it, and that’s the only reason laurance eventually stopped.
- laurance and garroth are both very good story tellers, but after one incident where garroth was telling levin and malachi a story, he started stumbling a bit over his words and couldn’t articulate correctly, so laurance picked it up and continued it. from there, they took turns with the story and occasionally interrupted one another to add a detail or plot point, and after that, malachi refused to listen to garroth or laurance separately when telling stories, because their collective minds came up with the most fascinating shit.
- garroth isn’t the best at coming up with insults because he’s simply too nice, but laurance loves to make fun of garroth (in good fun, of course). however, there is one thing that garroth could hold over laurance; and that was their height difference. whenever laurance would mess with him, garroth would just bring up height to piss laurance off.
- when laurance regained his sight, him and garroth sparred very often. that’s when garroth realized how much strength laurance actually had, since he’d originally underestimated him. laurance, in all honesty, was equally surprised. their spars were pretty evenly matched.
- while these two are best friends, the amount of arguments they’ve had is insane. most of them were light-hearted and were more so disagreements, but sometimes things escalated and would result in yelling. that’s because laurance always took it a step too far. that, or garroth would try to disregard what they were talking about, which only made laurance more heated. but they’re both incredibly quick to forgive each other. once they had a really bad argument and didn’t talk for an entire hour afterwards, but once they saw each other again it was like they’d never fought.
- since garroth grew up with everything and laurance often had to hunt and shit, garroth wasn’t amazing at it. laurance found out, originally teased garroth, but gave him tips and took him out and taught him how to hunt. garroth’s still shit at it when he does it alone, but when he does it with laurance he’s pretty decent.
- garroth doesn’t drink. laurance does. laurance once tried to convince garroth to drink, but he refused -- which laurance respected, but garroth had to deal with drunk laurance for the rest of the night at the guard station. he learned things that he really wish he hadn’t that night.
---
i had more for garroth and laurance’s relationship, but uh, i don’t really have time to write them down, so take these for now! i hope y’all enjoy them as much as i did writing them :]
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yet again im back on my bullshit so... (gazes with mixed feelings at the TV show Firefly) i could fix him.
my extremely long thoughts about my Own Personal Good Version of Firefly (with plenty of spoilers for the show and the movie) under the cut:
things that are getting axed first thing no question:
out with the whole “let’s add in a thin veneer of Chinese cultural aesthetics out of context for ~flavor~” deal. just no.
instead, let’s hire some actors from a bunch of different cultures and work with them to figure out how their characters would bring those cultures into space with them!! and also hopefully bring some experiences with immigration/alienation/travel into it, since the Whole Core of Firefly is about how humanity always brings our doomed and silly and stubborn and unique warmth with us even into the cold void where nothing is familiar or homey in the slightest.
let’s respect our sex worker character shall we?
i do appreciate that Inara’s work as a companion is described as legitimate and well respected in the show. however please stop having your captain and hero call her a wh*re every five seconds against her clearly expressed wishes and portraying this as just a totally acceptable thing
let’s be more respectful of our characters of color and also have some more diversity, shall we?
others have put it better than me but yeah, the way Zoe and Book are treated is very uncomfy, and the rest of the show is depressingly monochromatic. come on let’s do better.
stop the weird confederacy hat tips
again others have pointed these out with much more thoroughness than I could, but the names of some characters and locations, as well as some of the language used to describe the browncoats, has uncomfortably confederate vibes. instead i propose we very Clearly tip our hats to the Alliance equaling space capitalism instead! you can’t go wrong with space capitalism as a villain.
don’t! make! the! psychotic! character! violent!
listen i love River Tam with my whole heart. but you should absolutely not portray your only character with psychosis as violent because of that psychosis!!!!!!! and yeah, a huge part of her character is that her brain got fucked up by the alliance and so she hallucinates and is also a super ninja. but like. she doesn’t need to be a super ninja for her character to work, okay? the crew does not need to be scared of her for her character to work, okay??? more on this later bc it would take a lot of care and nuance to make her character work but i really think it can be done
things we are absolutely keeping:
found family tropes my fucking beloved
this should be self evident. this is why the show is as appealing as it is despite its flaws, at least in my eyes.
malcolm reynolds, the knight in dusty armor
there’s something so appealing to me about what Mal stands for. because at his core is this ridiculous, silly, stubborn, doomed devotion to what he thinks is important and right, a romantic idealism thinly covered by cynical cowboy platitudes that he thinks make his bleeding heart totally invisible. and he is so obvious and entirely incorrect. bless. this is a man who will do anything for his family, who charges into swordfights to defend his friend from a man who wants to turn her into an object despite having no clue how to hold a sword. at his worst, he starts brawls in bars just for the martyr’s thrill of being persecuted for supporting the right; at his best, he inspires downright religious belief from his crew because he represents a romantic and chivalrous and doomed dedication to the right thing over any practical concerns. and then he throws a “selfish” quip over it with 100% confidence that everyone fell for his clever distraction and believes him to be a dirtbag. he’s oblivious and ridiculous and god he makes me want to be a better person because he’s just so goddamned sincere. stupid, but sincere. 10/10 himbo. <3
Mal and Inara ultraslowburn friends to enemies to friends to lovers to enemies to friends to lovers to friends to...
there’s nothing i love more than a ship that’s just two people who know each other way too well, and they’re each the only one who knows the other well enough to call them out on their bullshit. the way Mal and Inara interact in the show sometimes makes me uncomfy but like. the core of their relationship has to stay.
space western aesthetic
i need the cows on a spaceship scene to stay like i need air okay
that sweet sweet religious shit
mal, who lost his faith in gd and a whole lot else during the war. who lost his faith in himself, and now feels he has to hide the part of him that still wants to be good, because he knows he can’t be anymore, and he feels like it’s embarrassing for a guy like him to want something so unattainable. who takes a preacher on board, and the preacher has lost something, too. the preacher has his own past, and his own questions. but not questions like the observant neurodivergent girl, the one who wants to interact with and understand this thing that’s so important to him, but it just doesn’t click with how her brain works and she feels like something needs to be fixed, either the Bible or herself. and Mal takes care of them all, and slowly, he begins to find gd again, not in a prayer but in humanity. humanity doesn’t need to be fixed, like the alliance thinks. the shining imperfect strawberry sweetness of it in his family’s smiles is something to be worshiped and served and devoted to. and he finds he has something to believe in again. (and his crew find that he’s given them someone to believe in, too. and maybe suddenly he’s a saint.)
and finally, my brilliant ideas as to what i would like to add:
TRANS WOMAN KAYLEE RIGHTS
listen her femininity is so important to me okay? it’s so thrilled about everything that’s pretty, from dresses to the spaceship’s electric innards, and it’s so non-traditional and grease stained until it’s not and it’s pink and ruffly and twirly, and she never sees any of it as a contradiction, because none of it contradicts, it’s all just her! her gender is warmth and love and prettiness, feeling pretty and appreciating the pretty and making her friends’ days pretty too.
i want us to find out she’s trans in that episode with the ball, and i want us to find out alongside Mal who just never asked or never realized. Kaylee gasps and squeals at the dress in the shop window and Mal makes an off handed, ill considered comment, and then... someone yanks him aside and hisses a few very significant words in his ear. and suddenly he remembers what the blue white and pink she painted all over the engine room means, and he knows he has something to make right. so he buys her that dress himself and lets her know just how pretty she looks, and when he walks into that ball with her displayed on his arm like something precious, he looks the proudest out of any man there. and she notices. for a few seconds, of course, until there’s chocolate, and ‘nara, and a chandelier—and some horrible girls, but she’s used to that, until—suddenly, she finds her people. a group of old men who light up when she jokes about compression coils and whack presumptuous boys who ask her to dance. they adopt her as a treasured granddaughter, and Mal is beaming at her like a proud dad, and she finds that one of her new elderly friends gazes a little too long at her bracelet, and so she gives it to xem and teaches xem a few new words, and... it’s a good day, huh? it’s a really good day. (of course, then the captain has to go and punch somebody in the face, but it was a real nice party up until then.)
also she and Simon are both transhet t4t im correct and you know it
time for a better River Tam
the first thing we’ve established is that this version of her is not unpredictably violent and the crew is not scared of her!!!! it makes no sense to take a kid who’s primarily brilliant, experiment on her brain, give her telepathic powers....... and tack on the fact that she also has super strength and speed and dexterity and what not, AND say that they programmed her to be super violent. no! no. not only is that extremely harmful rep, that’s also just stupid.
instead!! my version of River is in fact not terrifying to the crew, but is actually the one they feel safest around. River has always been totally blunt, she was one of those kids you could tell realllllly early was autistic, and she doesn’t like being disengenous at all. so you can always trust her to tell the truth and not play weird passive aggressive games or have any hidden agenda, which makes her just a really chill person to be around. also, one of her longtime special interests is music and dance, so whether or not she’s nonverbal on a given day, there will always be some sort of beautiful sound when she’s around. she does have the singing voice of a dying crow unfortunately but that’s ok bc Simon’s is even worse and they’re both incredibly competitive so you’ll at least get free entertainment out of the affair.
my version of River does have psychosis and hallucinations because of the trauma of the experiments, and they are really troubling to her. she and Simon work together to find ways to cope and meds that help, and it’s a process, but there are some things that help.
the only thing she gained from the academy was the ability to hear people’s thoughts and sense the future a little bit. and yeah, that led to her picking up a few spooky secrets at the beginning, which, yikes. and for a while, it was hard to figure out which voices were real and which were hallucinations. but around her friends, she always feels safe to ask “did you just think about triple cheese burritos or was that just a me thing?”, and they’ll always tell her the truth no matter how embarrassing their thoughts are, bc it’s important to all of them to respect her and help her sort accurately through what’s reality and what’s not. and bit by bit, she gets better and better at figuring out what kinds of things tend to be telepathy and what kinds of things tend to be psychosis, and that each one feels a little different. and because of the trust and respect and support of her found family she’s able to do that in a safe environment!!!
trans man Simon rights
listen i wanted to keep him as just a side note on Kaylee’s list but he is my son and he’s important to my heart so here goes
out on the outer rim where Kaylee’s from, gender ain’t much of a big deal, there’s an individualistic quality to life out there, and so if the trail you blaze is the trail of a woman or a man or neither or both, that’s respected even in the rare cases where it’s not outright encouraged. but in the inner planets, where competition and connections and public faces and family names are everything, you have to be what’s expected of you to survive. you can’t change your brand, you can’t be anything other than what your family planned for you since before you were born, it’s incredibly hard to survive in such a hyper competitive environment, and so your very identity becomes just a tool in how to market yourself for better success.
needless to say Simon (just as autistic as his little sister and also very trans) fuckin hated it there. but he was very good at it. correction: he was very good at his very specific field of STEM, good enough to where people stopped talking about how cute he looked in bows and started talking about how impressive his work was from a very young age. and his work had no gender. he could be whatever he wanted to in equations. so that was where he could express himself, and gd, he got so much praise for it, he never wanted to stop.
not until he discovered that his sister needed him, and ran away, and needed a disguise, and realized... suddenly, every stifling rule and prying eye was a million miles away. he was freefloating, freefalling, with none of the charted paths he’d been following all his life... so you know what? fuck it. he’s always enjoyed the name Simon. and since it’s not on any legal records, it’ll make him just that much more untraceable.
and on Serenity, starting over with new people who never knew him before his transition feels like an unbelievable blessing that just dropped right into his lap. he has to keep up the secrecy, he has to make sure they never find out who he used to be, because gd, it’s so nice when they look at him and say his name right, and he doesn’t know if he can handle losing that, not when it’s so new and so important to the person he’s finally becoming. but then one day, the unthinkable happens, the wanted posters for his arrest have an old name on them, they’re looking for the Tam sisters, and... nothing changes. the crew of Serenity could not give even a tenth of a percent of a fuck, and it doesn’t seem like they even know they’re supposed to. huh. that’s new. Simon could get used to that, he thinks.
i’m sure there’s more i could add, but it’s 4:30 in the morning now, so if more occurs to me, ill simply add it in a reblog tomorrow. if you’ve read down this far, i am in love with you. please let me know your Better Firefly ideas, too, bc im always down to yell about this show!!!
#firefly#Serenity#in which i choke out joss whedon with my bare hands and rescue his characters and give them better homes#ollies fix it series#malcolm reynolds#ollies personal good firefly canon
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I'm a storyteller both by trade and by hobby, and I understand a lot about how effective television storytelling works, in particular. My background has given me a different perspective than most people with regards to the finale, particularly what happens between Din and Grogu. Normally, I don’t get involved in fandom discussions, but I was encouraged to share my take on this. Spoilers below the cut in case I miss some tags, lol.
When I watched the episode this morning, I wasn't prepared for what happened. Like many of us, I expected a terrible cliffhanger or a neat conclusion like we got in the last season. Instead, Din encouraged his son to become a Jedi, leaving himself (and the rest of us) more than a little devastated. It was brutal. But also brilliant. Din and Grogu's individual and family arcs in this season came to a close in a way more beautiful than I could have expected. At the beginning of the season, Din kept Grogu at his side and protected him, but he was determined to pass him off to a Jedi. In part, this was because he believed it was Grogu's own good, but also because he wasn't ready to accept his fatherhood. We see this in the episode with Ahsoka. Even though he didn't want to say goodbye, he was willing to thrust Grogu upon her. When Ahsoka refused, Din was genuinely relieved and finally admitted to himself that he loved him and wanted him to stay a part of his life. That was further confirmed by the lengths he went to in order to get him back from Gideon.
Meanwhile, Grogu's gone through his own arc. We learned from Ahsoka that he hid his powers out of fear. We also learned that he's very afraid of being separated from Din, who he sees as his family. It's completely understandable. He's young and been through a lot. But that fear also makes it harder for him to train, so Ahsoka rejects him. Grogu himself continues to be a little reluctant to use his powers, needing encouragement from Din (unless it's to steal cookies). When he's captured, he fights the best he can to get away, but that fighting doesn't end up doing him much good because he can't control himself. It's my impression that, by the end of the season, Grogu's realized that he needs to be able to master his powers, not just to protect himself, but to protect Din, too. He's finally ready to step into his strength and become all that he can be, which is why he decides to go with Luke.
Din did not want Grogu to go. Everything in his being screamed that. He even say to Luke, "He doesn't want to go with you." However, when Luke explains what's going on, Din realizes that he must put Grogu's needs before his own. It's in Grogu's best interest to be nurtured in the ways of the Force, as he's always suspected, but now letting Grogu looks different than it did before. It wasn't Din rejecting his love for his son or pushing the responsibility of him onto someone else. He even did several things differently from when he tried to give Grogu to Ahsoka. First, he promises they'll see each other again. Personally, I don't think this is the end of them being together, even though Din says Grogu belongs with Luke (also more on that soon). Second, Din tells him not to be afraid. He wants Grogu to become confident in himself and all he can be. Third, he takes off his helmet to show his boy his face and let him touch him. While this is a huge sacrifice on his part because others also see his face, it is proof to Grogu that they are family and that they will always be family. Fourth, Din sets Grogu down on the floor and lets him walk to Luke. This is vitally important. In the past, he's tried to physically hand him over. This time, he lets Grogu make his own decision once and for all. Grogu walks over to look and asks to be picked up, indicating he truly wants to be trained. Din recognized him as an autonomous being with his own will, and respected and encouraged that, like a good father does. Was it easy? Absolutely not, but it was the right thing to do.
I'm not sure what Season 3 will look like as far as Din and Grogu's relationship goes. Maybe Grogu won't feature as prominently, maybe there will be a time jump, maybe something will happen and Luke will bring him back? I have no idea. None of us do. However, what I do know is that heart of the show is the relationship between Din and Grogu. I believe Filoni and Favreau know this, as does Disney. Grogu has made Disney actually relevant again, he's made them an insane amount of money, and I don't think they're going to let that cash cow go any time soon. So, everybody, please don't despair. It's going to be okay! ❤️
I'd also like to take a moment to discuss Luke. My feelings on this have evolved as I'm processed the episode over the last few hours. Initially, I wasn't very happy. I felt like a lot of people do. Why does it always have to be Skywalkers? Why couldn't it be somebody—anybody—else? Why did that have to do that weird CGI thing with his face that wigs me out? (That, admittedly, I'm still not a fan of, lol.) But with some time, I've realized that Luke makes sense. There's the inescapable fact that Star Wars is about the Skywalkers. They're the central characters of this universe. If Movies 6-9 hadn't been as godawful as they were, I think many of us wouldn't resent this fact so much. We're jaded, understandably. However, I don't believe it's fair to judge The Mandalorian's choice to include him based on other creators screwing him up in a future timeline. So far, Favreau and Filoni have been nothing but respectful of the Star Wars universe and its characters, and I'm choosing to trust them with this. But that aside, Luke is likely the only Jedi in the whole galaxy who would take Grogu as an Apprentice. Ahsoka didn't want him, too scarred by her own experiences and traumas. She also comes with the baggage the Temple placed upon its students, which was, if you have any "dark" qualities, you're untrainable. Meanwhile, in the original trilogy, Luke learned how to become a Jedi even though his legacy was those "dark" qualities. He overcame his own anger and fear and started new Jedi traditions. He's the perfect person at this point in his life to teach Grogu how to master his powers. He is obviously aware of how important Grogu is to Din and he'll take good care of him until the family can be reunited.
Personally, I loved this finale, especially the last few minutes. They absolutely destroyed me on a human level, but excited me as a writer and storyteller. By shaking the show up like this, it keeps the audience on their toes and reminds us that anything can happen. Din and Grogu's relationship is why people are so invested and throwing this huge kink that creates a massive conflict that the audience is desperate to have resolved. Aside from one of them actually dying (which would have me throw the show in the garbage), very little else could create such a reaction, which is the whole point. I can't wait to see what the creatives throw at us next year! 😃
#the manadalorian spoilers#the mandalorian season 2 spoilers#the mandalorian season 2#the mandalorian#mandalorian analysis
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HERMITCRAFT 8 LIVEBLOGGING
fifteen hermits worth of liveblogging. i am losing my mind. LONG POST AHEAD.
JOE HILLS (First HC8 Video)
Mumbo did the speech. he forgot everything he was supposed to say <3
Pearl and Gemini were just .in a pit . having stuff thrown onto them
Every Hermit is staying on the same continent !!
FIRST DEATHS VERY QUICKLY, Iron Golems took out Tango and Etho (maybe more?)
Joe seems to be the only one looting the chests
Evil Jevin !!
Evil Xisuma appearance on Jevin’s 60 second video!
Pearl has something planned for an “archeticual wonder” for a resupply area upon death?
Stress, Xisuma and Joe are capturing villagers and starting up a resupply debut.
Bdubs is killed by Cleo and is now OUT FOR BLOOD
First death counts- Etho, Tango, Bdubs, Cleo?
Cleo was killed by Keralis
Joe has now supplied Cleo with weapons and food . She left but not before saying “Time to kill BDubs again!”
Gemini was killed by Bdubs! They both died and are now at spawn.
Pearl was killed by Cleo
Pearl is planning a respawn inn !!
Cleo was killed by Iskall
Cleo was killed by Pearl
False, Stress, and Gemini team up??? AA!!! they brought a delivery of supplies to Joe <3
i wish i knew what was happening on that end .
APPARENTLY XISUMA IS ONTO MAKING THE SECOND VILLAGER BREEDER ALREADY ??
Iskall is the first with Diamonds??
Breathe in that ash !
WAIT IS TANGOS EYES LIKE THAT RN BECAUSE HES TEAMED WITH KERALIS AND BDUBS ???
KERALIS, BDUBS, AND TANGO TRIED TO DO A SHAKEDOWN ON JOE. HE TRIED TO DROP LAVA, GOT HIMSELF ONTO TWO HEARTS BECAUSE HE PLACED IT ON HIMSELF, AND IS NOW SWIMMING OUT INTO THE SWAMP
the big eyed trio are now off to shake down Gemini
Joe fell in Lava in the Nether
Joe Death To Lava Two: Electric Boogaloo
Joe drowned trying to kill a glowsquid
WATCH JOE’S VIDEO OH MY GOD SEAN HILLS RECAP RAP??? MY BELOVED????? i am gonna be streaming this unironically later LIKE OH MY GOD THIS SLAPS. ALSO THE CREDITS AT TEH END IS HILARIOUS
Zedaph Episode Recap
Zed gave us a recap of the continent every Hermit will be living on !!
Wouldn’t recommend Zedaph as the first video for the season, he skips the intro/speech but it’s Zedaph and hes making it fun!! Lots of nice editing :)
~SCIENCE TIME !~
Zedaph.. why is your starter base made out of concrete ?
There are no sheeps whatsoever on his mountain
Hes calling his lab an icecream sandwich..yeah i see it
Zed tried to make a portal underater...f
Scar died to a creeper </3
Zedaphs base is gonna be tracking how long hes there/someones loading the chunk!
XISUMA LIVE BLOGGING
A cool cinema scene of him becoming an axolotl!! <3
NOW I CAN SEE IT, GRIAN WAS THE FIRST DEATH!! Death by Iron Golem!!
XIsuma’s baseplans need over 45 THOUSAND BLOCKS TO BE PLACED
He’s also planning on making a shulkershell farm!!
i’m not gonna lie ! talking axolotl X is horrifying ! thanks !
Day one Villager Breeder... chaos.
Xisuma Derp! looked straight at a buncha wool and said how badly he needed beds and then walked away
THE GIRLS CAME OVER AND CONVINCED HIM HE NEEDS TO MOVE THE DESIGN OVER MY FIVE BLOCKS FOR SWAMP VILLAGERS..
THE GIRLS ARE JUST LAUGHING AT HIM AND HIS VILLAGER TROUBLES
day one and Xisuma has got his axolotl!!
Very pretty starterbase!!
XB’s
..I’m not gonna lie theres not much to say!! He’s very calm :) he says hes going into it without a plan, and htat last season was the only time he had any thought of what he was gonna do.
He made a real nice starter house and thats about it!
Cleo’s
Bdubs: “She ain’t gonna hurt me!! i’m invincible, babey!”
Cleo learnt that BDubs will never hurt her even if she deserves it . I am starting to realize why she kills him
SHE DECIDED SHES GONNA BE A PROPER CHAOS GREMLIN THIS SEASON...
AISDJASID CLEO GOT PAID TO KILL BDUBS?? HDUIAIHSI SCAR WHY
“Alright I found my mission for the season! Murder.”
Cleo, Mumbo, Grian, and Scar are all holed up in a cave together!
..Scar died from a skeleton !
Cleo has now split from Grian and Mumbo! Scar is missing in action
CLEO FOUND A GOAT
SHES KILLING THE GOAT???
she got a HORSE <3 and Joe gave her a saddle! I think her name is..Widget?
She LOVES the candles for shamboo n waterbottles and bits n bobs for her armorstands!!
Got her Armorstand stickgod book <3
Geminitay POV
NEW HERMIT NEW HERMIT NEW HERMIT!!
She has a LOVELY voice!!
The pov of her in a hole . being surrrounded . is kinda hilarious
It might’ve been Etho who was first death?? I GENUIENLY CANNOT TELL BECAUSE OF EDITING
All the murder was just for heads!
Seriously her voice is. wow
WE LOVE A QUEEN WHO KNOWS HOW TO CRAFT A SHIELD WITHOUT USING THE GUIDE <3
False, Gemini, and Stress are on the great journey for MOSS !
Gem just blew their minds with the moss.
TANGO KERALIS AND BDUBS ARE BACK Keralis: “Show the diamonds show the diamonds show the diamonds!” Gem: “Keralis. This is not how you make friends.”
The boys suecessfully recieved a diamond each
Etho n Iskall are travelling together!! You dont see those two together often
Etho got a glowsquid head!!
Gem: “Etho doesn’t share, is what i’m learning..?”
Etho hooked her with a fishing rod and said she has to do what he said .
In order to get the diamonds, Tango, Keralis, and BDubs placed down a sign saying “Gem is Great!” and Gem used a glow inksack on it.
Etho: “So..What is this? Do you have an ego, or this a motivational thing, or..?” He said, while laughing
Iskall: “I think its really funny that you have set your base up in the middle of a birch forest.” Gem: “I love birch forests! Do you not like my birch forest? Iskall: “I love it, yeah.” Gem: “This is the best biome in the game, Iskall.” Iskall: “Mmmm..” Etho: “I’m pretty sure I heard Iskall talking earlier that like, of all the biomes in the game, there was one he hated more than anything. Gem: “Oh really? And what was that one?” Iskall: “..Taiga.” Gem: “Taiga.. That’s true, thats a good one, thats a good one.” Iskall: “Don’t like Taiga.” Gem: “Mhm.” Etho: “Which one do you hate more than anyone?” Iskall: “..Diorite fields. Thats a bad one.” Etho: “Yeah thats a bad one.” Gem: “Didn’t know about that one. Well make sure to avoid’em. Birch forests are really good.” Iskall: “I’m a big fan of birch forests.” Gem: “Yeah, me too, me too. I’m glad we’re on the same page :) This is so beautiful! All the white and- and the like zebra stripes! is fantastic.” Iskall: “I..Um.. Yes.”
OH SHE’S CANADIAN,, ETHO HAS A FRIEND /j
She’s still in college :O SHE’S A SCIENTIST?? SHES WORKING AT A HOSPITAL?? POG!!
She accidentally found an enchanted golden apple in a mineshaft!! she thinks its the first she ever found in survival!!
She has a cow, sheep, and a few crop farms set up!! Her starter house has INTERRIOR!
SHE CHANGED HER SKIN AND ITS SO PRETTY AND HAS OVERALL AND I LOVE IT!!
shes doing a cottage core inspired base!
WOAHH!!! SHE MADE HTE MOST GOREGOUS CUSTOM TREE I’VE EVER SEEN ??
BDUBS IS HERE and he is so so so impressed by the tree ?!
also hes carrying a clock.. :(
He’s here with a present!
HE BROUGHT BAMBOO!
she thinks its so funny that he stops conversations to sleep AOIDHFEAUI\
SCARS
WE GOT A TRANSITION SCENE!! the canonical reason for the bed in his old village always being occupied is because underneath it, was his wizard portal!
Bdubs: “It’s a new season! You’re the little guy now!”
They are all very amused by that ^
they’re rubbing the fleece of bdubs jacket .
Bdubs: “Have a nice rub :)” PLEASEAHSIOJDIUASLDHIASDA
His starter base is gonna be a wagon and he wants the end game to be a bioshock esque skyscraper!
he confused a horse for a player . flashback to iskall thinking mumbo was a mob
PEOPLE THINK MUMBO DOESNT HAVE PANTS ON.... </3
Scar, Mumbo, and Grian.. have NO braincells. at all. THey just placed a crafting table with a boat on top with a bed on top with a boat on top .
this is what BROS FOR LIFE looks like.
BOATEM POLE !
SCAR IS STUCK UNDERGROUND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT IRL AND HAS NO PICKAXE..
AND HE DIED TO A CREEPER .
it seems like Grian, Mumbo, and Scar are working together !!!! HOLY SHIT !!
THERES SO SO SO MANY FARMS???????
he died several times trying to catch a skeleton with a sword
FIRST CHEST MONSTER OF THE SEASON <3
SCAR JSUT TOLD BDUBS HE LOOKS LIKE OSCAR THE CROUCH... BDUBS CANNOT EVEN ARGUE
OH NO.... GRIAN WENT AFK IN A HOLE . WITHOUT A HELMET .
THEY PUT A GLOWSQUID HEAD ON HIM
OH MY GOD MUMBO MADE A NOTEBLOCK SONG?? AJUDA
SCARS BUILTING IS SO SO SOOS GOREGOUS SERIOUSLY GO WATCH THE VIDEO OH MY GOD ITS HUGE
its a giant ass house boat wagon . its pulled by a llama . that killed him . so now its trapped, pulling hte agon, forever
Grian: “..Thats a very big house, for a very little hat.”
GRIANS SUPER SPECIAL EGG??
SCAR PUNCHED IT..
they really came out here . and killed the egg already.
Scar: “..I touched the thing”
TANGO POV
We see the three big eyed boys forming <3 they interrupted Tangos intro
THEY’RE BULLYING HIM ABOUT HAVING SMALL EYES AHIDUIASUHDWIS
HE TRIED TO CALL THE TRIO TEAM BUG EYE... THE OTHERS ARE VERY OFFENDED
they found an axolotl and Bdubs was TERRIFIED just screaming “WHAT IS THAT YELLOW THING?!”
BDUBS IS ATTACKING IT ???
okay nope Bdubs caught one and Tango lost it
Bdubs is naming his axolotl Idiot
AMAZING HOUSE. WHY IS TANGO SO GOOD AT BUILDING AND REDSTONE??
Impulse POV
MUMBO TRIED TO PLACE DOWN A BERRY BUSH TO HURT IMPULSE . HE FORGOT HOW BUSHES WORK..
I DIDNT EVEN NOTICE THAT IMPULSE WAS IN THE BOATEM POLE
so it looks like those four are hteo nes who grouped up together
PEARL BROKE THE CONSTITUION SHE GOT IN THE WRONG BOAT SMH
THIS IS SEASON EIGHT! FIVE BROS !
So its gonna be about five people in the same area!!
YOO!! Fantasy build for Impulse!!
G gave Impulse a spyglass, they had a fun moment of zooming in on eachothers face and complimenting eachother IHAUDIHAW
Grian and Impulse worked on an xp farm!
ASHDUIWAHISD GRIAN JUST LOGGED ON INFRONT OF HIM
a pillager stole his boat . not just any pillager . the one with a banner. </3
he has to live with Mumbo tuning a song .. </3 haha
Mumbo POV
it took fifteen seconds until Grian ran in during Mumbos intro
CONFIRMED? GRIAN WAS FIRST DEATH?
SECOND PERSON TO THINK MUMBOS PANTS ARE SKIN COLOR. GRIAN..
Grian: “Can you..Briefly explain why you’re just wearing a hawaiian shirt?” Mumbo: “Uh- what do you mean ‘just wearing a hawaiin shirt? I have shorts on as-well, dude”
FOLLOWED BY
Mumbo: “Can you explain why you’re wearing a red jumper?” Grian: “You know- you know i was born with this!”
MUMBO AND GRIAN STOLE THE BOAT LOOT FROM RENDOC
I THINK RENDOC JUST STOLE THE DIAMOND MUMBO THREW??
Grian: “Is that Scar?” Mumbo: “I can’t see past your giant waffle!”
DSFSDFJIOA they did an edit where they placed down a boat, both Mumbo and Grian got in, they made noises and then bopped up on top of the ravine they were in <3
THEY HAVE NO BRAINCELL THEY JUST PLACED DOWN A BENCH AND SAID “THIS IS THE MARK OF OUR VILLAGE!” and then placed a torch and a boat and a bed and aANOTHER BED..
..Mumbo is trying to be a pacifist this season!
Grian’s taunting him with beheaded things
And obviously part of being pacifist means he’s gonna be vegetarian in minecraft!
..he cannot use monster farms because pacifisim..
Mumbo was in the middle of reading the magical Timmy shack that Tango made (did i remember to mention that? who knows) and IN THE MIDDLE OF GETTING TO THE PART ABOUT IF YOU REMOVE STUFF FROM THE CHEST, NOTHING WILL BE ADDED IN IT AGAIN. Grian opened the chest . Mumbo SHOUTED HIAUDHUW Grian jumped man
They renamed it “Cave of Do Not Enter” HIAUEDUH
Mumbo and Scar BOTH did not know- at least Mumbo didn’t, Scar forgot, that podzol spawns from two-by-two spruce..
him and his guitar song to be played underneath his house.. it goes with the aesthetic i suppose
MAN HE NEEDS SO MUCH HAYBALES I FORGOT THATS NEEDED FOR THE TUNE HE WANTS
Mumbo: “What.. On Earth.. Scar, it’s meant to be a starterbase, buddy! What is this? This is many things, many many things, a starterbase is NOT one of them!”
HE LITERALLY DIDNT KNOW THAT THE DRAGON EGG TELEPORTS... WHEN YOU TOUCH IT...
BDUBS
nothing special we havent seen yet!! just him screaming about axolotls.
He was working in the Mesa in his intro, skipping the “speech” from Mumbo
He released Idiot the Axolotl and lost it .
Him SCREAMING “Gemini” is HILARIOUS
While Gemini gave away those three diamonds, Keralis got so excited he won a bet with Tango and Bdubs, that he gave back . two of the diamonds . and none of htem released until well after they left
Bdubs: “That’s why i have my mwoss skin!” PLEASE I LOVE THE WAY HE SAYS IT.. make the moss hood.. REAL..
it took me a while to figure out what his base is but i LOVE IT so so much!!!
Nothing much new to add !!
Stress pov
please i love her . very good !! False seems to have joined her sheerly because Stress sounded like she knew what she was doing. she does not.
False felt peerpressured and asked Stress for permission to fight her because everyone was killing eachother .
It ended up with Stress following False. they found a village!
ISKALL only saw him one other time today!!
JEVIN APPEARS AGAIN !
XISUMA FELL INTO HTE BREEDER AND IT WAS SO FUNN IUAHHYIAUSD
Ren: “Ya look goregous, Stress!” Stress: “Thanks! Don’t murder my dog!”
She’s so proud of herself for caving!! (with False n Gem
Iskall blew up!
..Iskall fell from a high place
Stress has a LOVELY ravine base!!
False
False wants to become pirates with Stress <3
gatekeep gaslight girlboss
BIG OL MUSHROOM HOUSE !!
it looks like a mushroom church and i LOVE IT.
Nothing new we didn’t see from Gem. She does want to come up with a banner design for her base, though!
Grian
..Mumbo just thought Grian had a purpose so decided to follow him <3
ALSO HIS INTRO, AS HE JOKED ABOUT IN THE OTHERS VIDEO, WAS, IN FACT, THE BOATEM POLE
Grian is SO PROUD of the fact taht they got good loot from a treasure map. Ren and Doc are NOT IMPRESSED
Grian: “Lets go, potato boy!”
Mumbo: “I don’t have to replace everything I break! Peace Love and Plants- are these plants..?” He says, mining amethyst
pants
he who controls the egg, controls the server... Grian.. you’re doing great sir
...He decided.. his goal.. is to make his OWN..caves and cliffs update... HELLO..?
Grian was the first one to kill the enderdragon, MAN. Speedrunning career WHEN? /j
Grian: “And now [Mumbo] is flexing on my bed!”
he might not have a base. but he has an egg.
It is now 2am. i cannot do this anymore. This will be continued.. tomorrow!
#long post#SERIOUSLY I CANNOT BELIEVE HOW LONG I WENT#spoilers#hermitcraft 8#hermitcraft 8 spoilers#hc 8#hc 8 spoilers#mcyt#mcytblr#hermitblr#hermitcraft#mika-posts
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