#how can a frickin VIDEO GAME

[nightmonkeysstuff]

So I was finally able to play Jedi Survivor and……

Don’t speak to me for 5-7 business days my soul is broken my eyes are crying, call me Padme because I’ve lost the will to live.

[dreamlifebunny]

Manifestation is ALWAYS guaranteed once you've made your wish omg. Like, always always always. A few months ago I said, "Goddddd, I am sick of feeling lonely, I need a boy who I can talk to about video game music for hours. We should be able to chat about anything and everything so easily. And have similar formative experiences so we can just get each other. And he should look exactly like this. And he should be super well put together and someone I don't need to take care of. And maybe we aren't even together because I'm not ready for that, but we can just be absolute besties who have crushes on each other. Yeahhh. Okay, anyway."

Moved on with my life, sometimes thought about it, quite often felt lack about it or heartache over not having friends like this, but always just daydreamed about this imaginal person.

GIRLLLLL, when I tell you that a few weeks ago I met this guy who I used to have a tiny crush on years ago that I totally had forgotten about?? He had a girlfriend at the time that I met him, but now he didn't. We bonded over video game music (especially my current hyperfixation) and made plans to hang out. Last night I hung out with him, and he made me frickin' SOUP in his fancy apartment and we talked about video game music for FOUR WHOLE HOURS. And he played piano soooo fucking well, and had the same experiences as me with music and video games growing up. And he looked EXACTLY like how I imagined him in my mind. God, and he's absolutely adorable, but I'd also be happy if we were just friends, since he's fulfilling my little crush quota. Like, what the fuck? Ask and it is GIVEN.

Whenever I "doubt" the law or I'm feeling lack or anything like that, stuff like this always brings me right back to the reality that I am god and there is nothing that I cannot be, do, or have. It always makes me feel so silly for forgetting my power; I'm team-working with an amazing creator (who in reality is just me, there is no separation) who brings about everything I want, in the exact perfect way, and all I had to do was make a silly little decision filled with hope and fun and love. It's not my responsibility to figure out the how or when, and that makes it fun. It's always guaranteed. It will not be late. It will always be perfect.

Make a wish and let it unfold. You'll be so happy that you did.

[thechocolatearmor]

OK OK OK OK OK people talk about sniper, or pyro, or medic being autistic right?

B u t

What if I told you all of them are?

Every single one.

Engineer? He's autistic. Soldier? Autistic. Frickin Spy?? Omgsh he's so autistic

So because my brain won't stop itching about this I'm going to write up a collection of all the evidence I have for why the TF2 mercenaries possess within their beings the big tism. By the time this is over y'all are going to be very sick of the word autism.

But IDC

So without further ado, let's go through each of these silly mercs one at a time:

Scout:

Alright, first up we got Scout. Scout I would consider to be AuDHD for multiple reasons

The ADHD is more obvious but like dude trust me he's autistic too

He's hyperactive, forgetful, gets distracted easily, kind of the basic stereotypical ADHD stuff you would notice immediately. He stims, he fidgets, he struggles in social situations, he's seen as over the top and a bit annoying, he talks a lot

Now a lot of these traits are things that are common for both autistics and adhders. But I wanna point out some things I notice about him that are autism specific

He has a special interest: It's Tom Jones. Honestly he probably has a special interest about baseball too

But I mean c'mon he's literally has a Tom Jones tattoo

You could argue this is just a hyperfixation but I bet it's been going on for a while

He also has "spikey" skills. Really good at stuff like drawing, dancing, sports, but he sucks at things like reading, math, etc

Mostly what makes me see him as autistic it's how he struggles in social situations. Bro doesn't know how to flirt unless he's got a bucket of chicken on hand

Soldier:

Honestly if anyone's autistic coded it's soldier

Special interest is all things American, especially if it relates to the military

Lots of autistic people wear certain items that remind them of something they like, usually disregarding things like how it looks or even whether or not it's comfortable. Soldier's helmet is way too big for him but he's almost always wearing it anyway

In meet the spy he does "hut hut hut" when he's doing down the stairs and it makes me so happy

He has no filter, he takes things really literally, he often sees suggestions as orders (teleporting bread anyone?)

Also when he says he's been doing nothing but teleport bread for 3 days it makes me think he must've been hyperfocused on that

I don't think he knows anything about volume control since he's yelling everything

What kind of neurotypical fights bears in Siberia while naked and covered in honey

He speaks his mind rather than beating around the bush

His helmet could also double as helping him avoid eye contact

Pyro:

Tell me they don't have aversion to like every texture besides their suit you can't

A lot of their animations are super stimmy

Pretty much nonspeaking

Has childish interests

Could also have schizophrenia? (I'm relatively uninformed about it tho so I might not be a good person to judge)

I bet half of their little mmph mmmph noises are audio stims

Special interest is fire

their stim is ARSON

Demo:

I headcanon him as AuDHD too

I mean tbf a lot of how he is is more related to alcoholism but shhh let me have this

But I mean he made friends with Soldier

Special interest in medieval weapons which would explain why he's crazy about swords?

Drinking could be an unhealthy coping mechanism/safe food

Probably also depressed with how he can never live up to his family's expectations

Infodumping about bombs in his introduction video

Honestly most of my "evidence" for him is just fanon but idc I like autistic Demoman

Heavy:

Whether or not him having a PhD in Russian literature is canon, some of his in game lines show him to be very poetic and thoughtful

The fact that he only has a few food items but always seems super happy to be eating them gives me safe food vibes

He sings and hums a lot, probably as a stim

He has the Resting Autism Face™

Special interest in his gun

A lot of his voice lines also just feel really stimmy to me, especially when he's doing the "YATATATATATA" thing

Not sure he has any volume control either

Seems to genuinely enjoy Medic's morbid stories, at least to a point

He really really really really really likes the song of the Volga boatmen in particular

He's the prettiest princess it's canon, you can't be a pretty princess without being autistic /j

He has a tiny bed for Sasha. HE HAS A TINY BED FOR SASHA

Heavy is often criticized as a class because guess gameplay is relatively simple and can become a little stale for a lot of people. Yet Heavy seems to have some of the most excited voice lines in the game. I feel like this emphasizes how much he thrives in routine, since he seemingly never gets bored of just doing his thing

Engie:

He has 11 phds

A lot of his voice lines also sound really stimmy to me. Either he's going YEEHAWW GIDDY UP or he's yelling DAMNIT DAGNABIT DANGIT DAGGIT NABBIT

Probably a lot of echolalia with that too

He humanizes his buildings and cares for them like a mother bird

Just listen to his genuinely heartbroken when his sentry gets taken down!

When playing Engie sometimes I find myself smacking stuff with my wrench even though I KNOW it's already level 3 and maxed and whatnot, or I KNOW I'm out of metal, just because I wanna hear the clang noise. So this point is just me projecting but I love the mental image of Engie giving his things a few extra whacks too

He sawed off his arm for his special interest

His whole monologue in meet the engineer is so autistic sounding to me

His dancing taunt also feels stimmy

He's always hunched over, implying irregular posture

He's a NERD—

Man of many talents including playing the guitar

Never takes those goggles off

How does he turn a stressful TF2 match into a (not so) relaxing tower defense game?

Medic:

I headcanon him as AuDHD too because he seems really scatterbrained and it feels like he's working on several things at once and always

He talks a LOT. definitely an infodumper

Either he's super stern or really giggly, there is no in between

He wears gloves in battle but not while doing surgery??? Does he just like organ textures??? Wacko

Special interest is obviously whatever the heck kinda of mad science he does

Here's a heavy medic headcanon I have: medic likes deep pressure hugs

Another special interest could be his birds

He's very spontaneous which makes me think AuDHD even more

Look how excited he gets when taking about the tumors in expiration date!

He got the organ stealing autism

Is it just me or does he fixate on baboon organs in particular???

Sniper:

I'm pretty sure all of you know why this man is autistic but I'm going to list some reasons here anyway

My main evidence tho are his Halloween voice lines: https://youtu.be/2WDljNAslys?si=JP25VOGGDWwwoCI7

Exhibit a, look how much he enjoys having an owl head

Exhibit b, lots of those voice lines make him sound really freakin' overstimulated

He probably wears the hat and shades for sensory reasons as well as because they look cool

Obviously the most socially reclusive of the mercs

I love his backstory where he learns he never felt like the other kids because he wasn't actually Australian, but what if he also didn't fit in with the other kids because he's autistic?

Also throwing rocks at people as a kid screams autism to me

No neurotypical would ever throw jars of his own piss at you either

I think he just wants to live in the woods somewhere and never come back to society and honestly that's based

I feel like he would be the type to bite his own arm when stressed (just like me fr 😭)

Extremely meticulous in following his own life rules (ie being professional and having standards, driving safely with the turn signal and everything)

Spy:

Ok just hear me out for this one

Smoking because stim reasons

He's literally and figuratively masking

He's very suave and probably really good with social things, but I feel like it looks like he's just practiced really hard, again MASKING

Who knows he might not even actually be French

Who collects photographic evidence for a ur mom joke

I see him as either being hypersensitive or hyper insensitive to pain depending on the day (his screams + "I do believe I'm on fire.")

Mad butterfly knife tricks as a stim? (Notice he couldn't help but fiddle with them even disguised as scout in meet the spy)

He sucks at dealing with relationships and that's one of the reasons he's a bad dad

He actually really cares about his team and you can see it especially in expiration date but he's not very good at expressing it

Do you think he wears the ski mask for sensory reasons too?

Probably has his suits tailored to not give him any sensory issues, which could be another reason he likes them so much

Believe me I could go on but I think this is enough to get my point across

THEY ARE ALL AUTISTIC >:00

[eponymous-rose]

So I've been playing Baldur's Gate 3 like everyone else and had An Incredibly Wild Combat Experience just now...

(spoilers under the cut for an early-game fight; if you don't care about the game, this is 100% parse-able as a d&d fight)

So there I am with my character Amisra (elf fighter), and a party consisting of Karlach (tiefling barbarian), Astarion (elf/vampire-spawn rogue) and Gale (human wizard). We venture into the lair of a hag to try to rescue this woman she's kidnapped and I'm getting a little blithe when it comes to spell slots and short rests - everyone's starting to look pretty rough, and then there's a long stretch of having to navigate carefully around traps, mostly via jumps that I actually remember to have Feather Fall on this time. "No problem," I think like every D&D player before me, "I'll simply take a long rest before the boss battle." And the game, in its DM-ish wisdom, says, "No, you can't long rest in the lair of an actively hostile enemy, what were you thinking???" and that's how I get into a fight that's way, way over my head.

I'm giving it my best shot, dealing with illusory hag-enemies and complicated terrain, but it's clear this is going to be my first total-party-kill of the game. Several characters have been knocked down and brought back up, and we've been in enough of a bad state that all of our healing potions are gone (leading me to the realization that you can craft in battle, which then leads to all of the crafted potions also being consumed).

The stage is set for disaster: the hag still has half her health (60-something points), and my whole party is out of all spell slots and fancy tricks. Astarion and Karlach are knocked unconscious on the other side of the room via Ray of Sickness, making death saves. Gale and Amisra are in some sort of necrotic zone that's dealing damage every round.

The immediate turn order: Gale, Hag, Amisra. Gale has 1 HP and will be unconscious from the necrotic damage after his turn. Amisra has a whopping 7 HP but is being held in the damage-over-time area by a Hold Person spell she cannot seem to save against. The hag has a perfect shot on everyone in the room.

So I'm sitting there like "well, it was a fun run while it lasted" and trying to remember when I saved last. At this point, I figure I might as well go for a little roleplay flair and try to think of what Gale would do for this, his final turn. Well, he'd look to magic. But, uh, sorry, those cantrips aren't going to deal 60 points of damage and get you out of your current predicament. Too bad.

Hang on. I've picked up so many scrolls, surely there's something there that might be a fun finish. Scroll of Flying? Nah, then I'll just die in midair. Scroll of Ray of Enfeeblement? Yeah, I'm sure she'll be real sad that her melee attacks do marginally less damage as she annihilates us with ranged attacks anyway. Scroll of Feign Death? Who's ever even used that spell successfully in a video game? What would you even--

Wait. Scroll of Feign Death. Resistance to all damage types except psychic, puts the target in a comatose state. Gale's going to be unconscious next round, but Amisra still has 7 HP...

So Gale, very dramatically, pulls out this scroll and casts the spell on Amisra, who Feigns Death very convincingly considering she's frozen on the spot and slowly taking damage. And Gale takes the last burst of damage himself and falls unconscious.

The hag absolutely doesn't stop there and keeps hitting Karlach, Astarion, and Gale until they're dead... but she never targets Amisra. She thinks she's dead. She actually thinks she's dead! And she might be right, as Amisra takes 2 HP and 1 HP of damage each turn, frozen in place...

And the hag just... stops. Everyone is dead, right? Yup, four bodies on the ground. Time to go and do whatever it is hags do for fun. She leaves the battlefield.

And Amisra finally saves against the damage-over-time with One. Frickin'. Hit. Point. Remaining.

I as the player have about 1 HP remaining myself as I fumble frantically to move Amisra out of the dangerous area and manage to remember how to use a mouse in time to cast a Scroll of Revivify on Gale. Two of us, each stumbling around at 1 HP, no other healing available, no idea where the hag is in her lair, the rest of our (very dead) party on the other side of the giant room, and a huge path of traps and treacherous drops to get back to the surface. What can we do but press on, deeper into the lair?

In the next room, which I have never seen before, I am shaking. If there's a trap, we're probably done. I'm too nervous to try looting anything in the room - what if she comes back? And then I see a sparkly fairy circle of mushrooms, looking an awful lot like an exit. No way. NO WAY.

I click that fairy circle so many times and just hold my breath as the two remaining party members stumble to the exit... and promptly appear back in the (slightly less dangerous) bog. The bog where, in its infinite DM-ly kindness, the game finally allows us to make camp, where I can resurrect Karlach and Astarion in peace.

And that's how we avoided a Total Party Kill with the most situational spell scroll use imaginable!

Edit: Also, a tip for when I did go back to fight the hag - a 2nd-level Magic Missile auto-hits up to 4 targets, so if you position Gale toward the middle of the room you can take down all 4 illusory hag-clones in one turn. Ahh, it was nice to have spell slots again.

[asksythe]

FGO Fes 2024 "CHALDEA Treasure Hunting" Experience Video - Introduction Section (Earphones recommended / Low volume recommended) Original Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dElTAHf0m0

Disclaimer: the translation is rushed, so there's probably room for improvement. I'm just posting this here for personal keeping since similar videos have been taken down from Youtube in the past.

Note: The context for this part of the event storyline is that Ritsuka is sent on a treasure hunt for a lost Holy Grail (as it goes) by Goredorf. She gets to choose one among several servants (Aesclepius, Takasugi, Tiamat, etc...) to go with her. Only one though. This video is the introduction section with Goredorf. Yes, it is very otome game-esque. 😁

I plan to (pester and rope my husband into helping me) translate the other sections, too, eventually. And then link them all back to this introduction video.

--TRANSLATION--

My! You have come a long way here.

This is Chaldea Base on the far end of the Chaldea Pavilion. As the one most responsible for the Chaldea Pavilion, I am unifying it into one! Chaldea Pavilion’s crown jewel is our Technical Advisor’s specially crafted Holy Grail! This Grail is the fruit of our advisor’s efforts in giving it polish!

I’d like as many people as possible to enjoy it while they can!

Witnessing that grail is the number one reason why you came here. Naturally, your selection is due to my good graces as the caretaker… You can be grateful and I accept your respect and admiration. If you encounter any troubles then you should forward your complaints not to me, but rather to management. Got it?

With that, let’s take a look shall we!

We’re still organizing the preparations..

Just a little..bit..more..

Which one…Now where did I put that thing…?

Uh? Oh?

How can there be nothing here? No way! It was here just a minute ago!!!

Oh oh oh…this is this is bad!

I’m going to disappoint the Technical Advisor so much!

There’s no way around this…

Think man, think! And frickin DO SOMETHING already, Goredolf!!

…Ugh.

Oh right! Oh right! Oh yes, that’s right!

You!

You! You!

How about it? How about taking on a little job for me? “The Search for the Holy Grail!” sound good to you?

The highest caretaker must attend to his tasks here you see. He can’t be reckless and go outside.

If you please, knowing the magical powers of our Technical Advisor, you should be able to sketch out its whereabouts. And wouldn’t that be splendid news!

For the sake of the exhibition hall of our “Chaldea Pavilion” I have assembled the greatest class to find all of these treasures.

Our Chaldea Treasure Hunting Unit will aid you in finding our booty!

I did have in mind for you to help me with preparations on this end, but these are grave and unavoidable circumstances.

The Servants will be standing by at their respective locations outside of here. You must go out and call for them. They will certainly aid you on your journey.

So get ready and get out there!

I wish you happy hunting! (Lit. Praying for good health)

[raccoonfallsharder]

not an ask more paying respect lol, i did the ask abt showing rocket more terran references/ goth music and you did it amazingly thank you so much. i like how it made me think differently too! i bet rocket wouldn’t like too much horror thinking abt it now but stuff like supernatural/ creepy sound better than gore for him. i bet stuff like the toxic avenger is right up his alley lmao. i love how you included reality tv and video games and just showing rocket other genres. i loved what you did with it! i feel like rocket would like rupaul too for the drama and art. i feel like like they could make their own drive in/ outdoor theater on knowhere and can watch anything in the galaxy lmao😭. and i loved how you wrote rocket w music he is the definition of listens to everything <3. i completely loved this thank you <3

you are SO fucken kind (˃̣̣̥ᯅ˂̣̣̥) holy shit i will cry now. like, just how sugarsweet are you? thank you bby ♡♡ also i am going to just take a moment to cosign your drive-in/outdoor theatre idea! this was absolutely EXACTLY what i was imagining in the second bulletpoint on this #marvel critique post. i want a whole stupid disney+ show of this, mst3k style

also, you are so right about rocket loving drag and you should fucken say it.

that furry bastard is such a dramatic little punk in his own way. you just know he likes shiny gems and glittery shit far more than he says (i have a ton of headcanons about this but it comes down to — rocket craves lovely, luxurious things and also doesn't believe he deserves them. and also believes most people who have them don't deserve them, and thus, he has few qualms about stealing them. but also never trusts he'll be able to keep them. look, our lil guy is so conflicted.)

the first time you take him to a drag show, i hope you keep it a surprise. let him gripe and complain the whole way there until the uber driver looks like he wants to scream. look, it's not rocket's fault. he frickin told you he'd had a shitty three cycles since he'd seen you last, and now he just wants to crash on your couch with you and order in sushi and rewatch edward scissorhands (you're not sure how that last part's supposed to help — he always ends up silently crying into his fur two-thirds of the way through). he gets even grumpier when you have to wait outside in the relative cold. once you're finally seated at a small table house-left, he's still sulking and snarking, to the point that you almost wanna wring his furry neck yourself.

but then the music starts. maybe a little aretha franklin. gloria gaynor, or some classic cher. yeah, i'm guessing the show stars with cher. slow, silky, low notes pouring out over the stage. strong enough, maybe. when the first queen steps out, rocket's jaw actually drops. by the time the bright pop of disco-synth hits the song, you'd swear the mirrorball is reflecting little stars and hearts into his candied-apple eyes. he's drinking it all in: the drama, the sly and exaggerated winks that put his own oversized winking habits to shame — the gowns, the sequins, the feathers, the heels. the long lashes and sultry stagecraft, the pageantry, the snark, the fun. the music, the theatre of it all, the spotlights and the perfections and the imperfections — and the brightness, like staring into the spiritual equivalent of an anulax battery explosion.

you leave him at some point, just for a moment —making your way to the bar, bringing back the sugary tequila cocktails he's lately taken to liking so much — and he doesn't even touch it. maybe takes a sip, but forgets it's there. it's probably the first time you've seen rocket ignore an opportunity to get at least slightly buzzed (hey, he's made progress in recent years). but this time, the temptation isn't even present. he's staring at the stage, swaying and bopping to the lip-synced lyrics — completely glitterdrunk. he's fixated on the satin corsets and the braying laughter and the ribald jokes, the irreverence that somehow feels like coming home, and all the while he’s wondering what his own long claws would look like if they were painted that color.

it's not like rocket hasn't seen theatrical gender performance before. it's a common-enough phenomenon in deep space, where there are as many expressions of identity as there are stars in the sky. a lot of cultures are far more chill about crossing gender lines or leaning into extreme caricatures, for a kaleidoscope of reasons. some planets don't even have lines to cross, either because gender is a nonconstruct or because it's so extremely flux that it might as well be superfluid helium.

but there's something about this kind of performance that just hits different for rocket. he probably doesn't know enough terran history to understand what he's picking up on. sure, in the far-reaches of the galaxy, diverse gender expression may be the norm — but here on terra, there are conservatives and bioessentialists and police raids and worse. what rocket sees — folded in between the blade-sharp eyeliner and the spun-sugar wigs and the gunmetal-glint of sequins — is rebellion. it's the core blazing fire of demanding the right to be exactly who you are or who you want to be, even if only for a moment. it’s throwing fists when you have to and protecting your people when you can. it's the freedom to give an acrylic-tipped middle-finger to anyone who ever thought they had the right to reinvent you according to their idea of perfection.

it's a fuck-you to every high evolutionary out there, herbert e wyndham or otherwise.

and — maybe more importantly — it’s not just the struggle. in the face of every hostile neighbor and violent lawmaker, it’s taking back some fucking joy.

rocket can taste it.

which is probably why he doesn't want to leave, even after the show draws to a close and someone's yelling about last call. by the time you finally convince him to go out to the sidewalk and wait for your uber back home, a small number of the queens are departing as well — clustered on the sidewalk like gems snatched from taneleer tivan's jewelry box. you don't think you've ever seen this damn raccoon treat an adult-humie-stranger with anything softer than semi-polite suspicion — yourself included — but suddenly, he's turning up the charm, sidling up to the ladies to thank them for their performance.

the queens, of course, are immediately smitten. who's this handsome fucking dreamboat, and how’d he get those biceps, and does he want a selfie? rocket lets them coo over him with exaggerated, syrupy delight — not even snapping when one of them scritches his ears. he shrugs and juts his thumb at you and gives one of them your goddamn phone number, and they squish in for the aforementioned snapshot. he's got big ol' lipstick-prints in his fur already and when someone raises a paint-arched brow and comments suggestively on the many possible uses of his tail, rocket finally sinks into that familiar shit-eating smirk.

you breathe a sigh of relief when you see it. for a couple seconds there, you’d barely even recognized him.

the uber pulls up and the queens pout — how did the surly jackass who steals your pillow and eats all your lucky charms manage to dazzle them all in less than five minutes? — and when rocket gets in the vehicle, he immediately goes quiet in that way he does — suddenly pensive. thoughtful.

your phone buzzes. it's the selfie of him and the goddamn queens. you lean over and show it to him, and he nods, the corner of his mouth curving faintly. His tail flicks on the seat between you, and his ears twitch as he turns to look out the window.

thanks.

you startle when he speaks, despite the fact that you usually can't get him to shut up. but the quiet gratitude sits between you on the bench like a third passenger in the backseat of the car, studded with distant stars and the receding lights of the city.

no problem, you say slowly. i knew you'd like it — i just didn't know how much. you tilt your head. maybe trust me the next time i tell you i wanna take you somewhere.

he scoffs quietly, but the sound is only made of soft camaraderie and old habit. and then — slowly, like the words are hard to find between stoplights and midnight shadows — he adds, this was... special.

you can hear him swallow. his head is still turned to peer out his window, but you can see the ghost of his reflection in the glass: eyes red as lollipops and sour candy, sometimes turning flat-gold with the passing light. His eyelids flicker shut, then reopen.

some asshole once told me— he starts. stops. swallows again. clears his throat. some asshole once told me we all had this — this sacred fuckin' mission to — to take a cacophony of sounds and turn it into a song.

you can hear the words he's quoting, and his voice drips thick with disdain — and also maybe some uncertainty. some vulnerability. whoever it was who'd said this thing to him — it had cut deep, and put down venomous roots. but you don't respond. not yet. you've learned to wait in moments like this — to let the silence curl around you both, low and comforting as old quilts.

but this, he says finally, four blocks later. this was like... taking songs and turning them into a cacophony. but of — of good things. his brows crease in his reflection, and you an see his eyes flick back and forth, searching the darkness.

a cacophony of liberation, you suggest quietly. and of — joy, and reclamation, and — togetherness, i guess.

he lets out a breath so heavy that his shoulders drop when they're free of it. you stretch across the bench-seat, and you know he's watching your hand reach for him in the window's reflection — but he doesn't draw away from you, not even when you card your fingers through the soft fur at the base of his ears, tousling a soft cloud of pixie-dust sparkle into the air.

and of glitter, you add lightly. you hear the uber driver muffle a grunt of dismay.

but rocket just smirks out the window.

yeah, he says, and it takes a second for you to realize that even though he's agreeing with you, he's also confirming something he's been turning over in the privacy of his own head — all night, maybe. when he repeats himself under his breath, it sounds — it sounds like a soft new bandage, almost. like he’d gone to check on a wound he’d thought had turned to rot, only to learn the the scar’s looking clean and smooth and healthy, and healing up just right.

yeah. that fucker was frickin' wrong.

as per frickin' usual.

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raccoon & star dividers by @/thecutestgrotto support banners by @/saradika-graphics

gotg rocket

[dairy-farmer]

Sexy Videos Informer Au? owo?

Consider this! Nightwing? NOT in space. Cannon is what cannon does, but now with Extra Nightwing Action(tm)! Jason and him bond. Nearly die! Get beat to hell and back. Nearly die HARDER. But Do Not!

They ARE laid up in the hospital though. Bruce is playing the "it's all my faaaaault" game. More focused on beating people up then investigating serious crimes. Not good.

Enter stage: Literally Next Door! Timmy! *polite applause*

He has a shameful, shameful hobby! No it's not THAT. (Yet.) You see, on the internet? There are, and I should warn you to brace yourself, perverts and NERDS! Gasps, pearls clutched, questions asked of parliament! I know, I know. I too, was shocked. SHOCKED I say! But it's true.

And our dear Tim? Largely unsupervised.

He stumbled upon... Interesting(tm) internet communities. One of which was the "Capies". Individuals with Hero-sonas.

Yes it is EXACTLY as problematic as it sounds. People have accidentally gotten shot. No, it has not stopped them. And yes, it routinely gives the JLA a raging headache. Luckily, most of the costumes aren't very good.

MOST of them.

Tim Drake is NOT a mediocre child who settles for "good enough". HIS Hero-Sona, Magpie, wears MILITARY-grade reinforced clothing! It's styled of Batman's get up. He feels Really Cool when he wears it.

But... thing it? He only every wore it around the house. He's not a REAL hero. Not like his Robins. But? He IS pretty sneaky! And with a few additions? He bets he can help? Just a little.

"A little" he says.

He blows five smuggling rings wide open. And so begins Bruce's ongoing stress migraine. The very fast child with DANGEROUS information, who's clearly been spying on MOB BOSSES and ROUGES, that he can't catch! Not him. Not Robin, once he recovers. Not even Nightwing!

YEARS pass. And he's only getting FASTER. Bruce is starting to legitimately consider Dick's offer to have the Speedsters grab him. Magpie may not be Bat trained, but he's clearly an Ally, and they NEED to talk.

Meanwhile? Tim found out for a lot of Capies, it's a sex thing. Not a cosplay thing. He... learned some stuff about himself.

Decided to document himself, learning about himself. For, you know, when he's a good enough hacker he won't INSTANTLY get caught the second his costume shows up on the internet. Frickin Oracle.

His first videos are kinda clumsy. Good angles, obviously, but he didn't know WHAT to do with himself. Was embarrassed to spread his legs that wide. But then he figured it out. Got his toys.

Probes to reach reeeeal deep and plugs that pop wetly in and out. Dildos he learned how to work into himself. How to rock his hips in a way that felt so, so good. How not to be embarrassed. Let himself moan and gasp, whimper and whine as loud as he wanted.

Learned how many little vibrating eggs would FIT. Pushed in, one after another, til he was all gushy and full to the brim. Learned how many times he could gush. He even got a sybian!

He kept his videos all on a flash drive. On him, obviously, so they'd be safe.

Until they WEREN'T safe. Batman came out of NO WHERE. They struggle. Batman goes to pin him! And? Tim sacrifices his jacket to escape. It's only when he's home and ready to unwind that horror sets in. The flash drive was in his chest pocket.

Batman has his sex tapes.

And he more the just has them. He is actively WATCHING them. Watching as Tim works himself over. As his poor little hole is stretched and fucked. Made sloppy, twitching, and wet. Denied the real thing at every turn.

Watchs him play with his little chest. Stroke along his body, as he admits to- And Bruce brain screeches to a halt. Watching as Tim desperately rides a toy he's dubbed "Batman". Listening to him gasp and whine. Catching EVERY "Br-" that cuts to a "Bat", as Magpie catches himself.

Magpie knows who he is.

Wants him. BADLY. And was not planning on revealing it. These videos have yet to be edited. More then one sort of thrill runs through Bruce at the thought. He wonders what sorts of incriminating information Magpie forgot to remove, from the background of his videos? He'll have to watch them to know.

It's hardly a hardship, he muses, watching Magpie twitch and gasp through an orgasm. He can already spot no less then three different identifiable routes of investigation in the background. With every one he spots, he's narrowing down his suspect pool.

And Tim? Seriously considering BURNING his costume. No one can knooooow. He... he should skip town. Leave the country! Become a HERMIT! Oh god, Batman know he masturbates to him!!! His life is OVER. There's no coming back from thi-! *casual knock on a window*

Is that Batman on his balcony?

Huh. It is.

PANIC.

He doesn't even make to the door. Bruce is full on Victorious Shark grinning and Tim should NOT find that hot, since he's OBVIOUSLY about to die here.

He doesn't die. He ends up naked, pinned to his own bed, fucked deep and slow on the biggest cock he's ever taken in his LIFE, as Bruce casually explains what's GOING to happen. Tim WILL being joining them. WILL be receiving training. WILL be accompanying to several upcoming galas, dress nicely, and then he's GOING to be fucking Tim through the mattress.

No more running. Understood?

Tim is pretty sure he can TASTE the dick in him. Would agree to pretty much anything to make Bruce move faster. To make him stop TEASING. Yep. Anything you say. First born? All yours.

Bruce? Fucks him UNCONSCIOUS. Stays nice and deep, to keep himself warm and keep Tim full. Goes full marathon until he gets Tim to agree to join Team Bat and pretty much anything else he can think off. You know, like a cheater. Because Tim, as he quickly learns, will agree to pretty much ANYTHING when Bruce is pounding him.

-🐼

😍😍😍😍😍 tim making little sex tapes and bruce getting ahold of them!!!😍😍

[big-low-t]

@ourladyofomega posted this several days back and I thought I would toss my answers out there as well for it.

A game of First, Last, Next, and Favorite.

First concert: Rush, 3/29/1983, Signals Tour. I was in my teens, met up with some class mates that were going with me. They decided they wanted to go drink, chase girls and/or smoke. I was already a music geek, music nerd or music snob... any of those titles fit me... so I went in and sat down. John Butcher Axis was the opening band. I seem to remember they had one song that was pretty decent. I can’t describe how good Rush was. I really believe this was them at the top of their game. They opened with The Spirit of Radio and it just got better from there. Stuff like Tom Sawyer, La Villa Strangiato and YYZ and the incredible Neil Peart drum solo. They had a huge video screen in the background. When they played the song Countdown they had the Space Shuttle launch film playing in sync with the song. Truly amazing to see so much talent on one stage. And THAT was my first ever concert. I never did see my so-called friends during the show, and to be honest, I didn’t care once the music started.

Last concert: It’s been a while since I saw a show (mid 2000′s maybe?) and I can not remember which one of these shows was my last... but I saw a group of bands all one one record label. ALL, Someday I, Wretch Like Me and I thought another band, but I can’t remember who (Armstrong? Maybe?). The other possible last show was the bands From Ashes Rise, Breather Resist, Challenger and I think Strike Anywhere. 2004 I think? Damn I need to start going back to shows. Kids, marriage, work, life... all sort of got in the way for a while I guess. That and the lack of anyone to go with me back then. From those shows Someday I, From Ashes Rise and Challenger stood out to me as being really good. Most people probably haven’t heard of most of these bands.

Next concert: No idea at all, but it needs to happen!

Favorite concert: This depends on when you ask me. The first time I saw Fugazi was an amazing experience. Second time was awesome as well. Rush was fantastic (see above). Iron Maiden frickin’ ruled, especially when Eddie came out on stage. Ramones were super cool and fun to see. Lallapalooza 92 was great with Lush, Ice Cube, The Jesus And Mary Chain, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, Ministry and RHCP. I got hit by a flying cheeseburger during the Ministry’s set. Still wrapped and everything. No, I did not eat it. I have seen some amazing bands and some great shows.

I would ask @zelphafrost, @deliberatecontrarian, @pyretic-perfect-storm and really anyone else to do this too, but only if they wanted to and had the time.

Have a great day everyone! Stay safe, stay cool!

[lets-try-some-writing]

Oooh, can we get a directory’s commentary on the Blind Starscream AU and the Starscream Knitting AU? I know they are small AUs, but I enjoy rereading them from time to time. Plus they involve my favorite (troubled) Seeker. Also maybe one for Broken Record too because that one was just so gosh darn good! Please and Thank you!

I got you! I love giving my thoughts on the writing! Also I seriously adore the Starscream knitting AU and I have fun with the Blind Starscream AU too. I just ran out of ways to continue them. Any ideas for them would be gladly accepted :3

Blind Starscream

It was born of a request, and honestly I wasn't the most enthused with it because I had no plot to give the AU. It was a concept game rather than a story for me. Not a bad thing from time to time, but I like having a story to follow to write for. However with that said, it is a fun one and I recall having a great time thinking about how frickin funny it must be to watch Optimus yeet water at Screamer because he's scared of the bugger.

Extra tidbit about this AU: Starscream actually thinks its super funny to pretend he can see, but ONLY around ST3V3 the Vehicon. Starscream will act as though he can see perfectly and stare with lightless optics right into the Vehicon's visor. ST3V3 is terrified, but not a spark believes him when he says Starscream can see and absolutely can end their lives. Well, they believe the second part, but most don't question Starscream's blindness.

Starscream Knitting

It has been a VERY long time since I last looked at this AU. I hardly remember where it began, but I know it was made when I still didn't know how to format anything in visually pleasing and rational way. I don't go back and read my old work for a reason. (lll￢ω￢)

That said, I have had one image in my head since I learned about how running a small business works. Starscream, with stupidly colorful packaging, slowly and carefully getting every package done with his giant frickin claws. Oh! And those nails are absolutely manicured so that he can take videos and pretend he's just a really stylish knitter. He will never admit he enjoys his claws being painted a vivid red.

He secretly watches manicure videos online and asks Knockout to do him up every now and then.

Broken Record

Oh boy. The emotions were STRONG with this fic. It was the week before midterms and I was STRESSING. So of course I gave my baby some trauma to make me feel better. I was actually at work most of the time while writing Broken Record. I listened to City of the Dead on repeat the whole bloody time because it set the mood. No escape. No victory. No hope. Only loss.

Tidbit about Smokey in this fic: He did absolutely everything under the sun to make things work, and while not shown super closely in the fic because I enjoy being somewhat sane, he had a DEEP relationship with the team. He came to see Arcee as a sister in a sense. He adored her and looked up to her for many long loops before he had to pull away and then grew to see how badly her grief was hurting her. He wasn't the closest with Bulkhead and Wheeljack, but he shared many long nights alongside them, talking about the slightly happier aspects of war. Bumblebee he saw as a brother and eventually a ward as time dragged on. As he matured, he felt the need to watch over the scout, just as Optimus did. This was never fully expressed in the fic, but if given the chance, Smokescreen would take up a parental mantle if only to honor the fallen. He was especially close with Ratchet, that with the medic being the closest mech he ever had to a father.

Surprising right? You would think he's see Optimus that way. However he can't see Optimus like that. In his optics, Optimus is like a ghost. He learns from the mech, but Optimus is a strange thing for Smokescreen. A living dead mech. As much as Smokescreen bonded to the Prime, it was all a very solemn thing. But him and Ratchet? He loves Ratchet as a son would his father. Ratchet was always there for him, always offering comfort instead of the cold conformation of loss that Optimus gave. I didn't have enough time to write it, but I really wanted a scene where Ratchet tucked Smokescreen in after a long day and even managed to get the truth from him. I wanted to write one loop where Ratchet knew, and all he could do was hold Smokescreen's servo and weep as the loop came to an end.

Another tidbit: I fully intend to write a prequel with Orion and his trial. And let me tell you, what I have envisioned is ROUGH. It will take me a hot minute to write I think, simply because writing Broken Record required me to have a VERY off mental state to make it happen. However when I write it, let me say now that Orion Pax will have no frame of reference and do far worse things than Smokescreen in an attempt to get out. There could have been other ways to get out, but after so long? He just wanted to be free, no matter the harm it caused to Megatron at the Council chambers.

[sariel626]

Interrupting a Stream

So in this reader is a YouTube Streamer and being honest, I got inspiration for this while watching shxtou twitch vods. Yes I know twitch is very different from YouTube.

Oh, and your Streamer name is Seranisin, Chat calls you Sera for short. The first game is called Night of the Consumers, the second is Mr.Hopps Playhouse

TW: cussing

———————————————————————

“Stupid frickin’ customers! I was one shelf away from beating the game!” (Y/N) screamed at the screen which showed the words ‘You’re Fired’ in a blood red colored font. The chat was blowing up at the streamer’s rage, mostly ‘LMAOOO’s and some offering strategies to help the female when she began her 17th attempt to stock the grocery store shelves without running into any customers.

Right as (Y/N) was calming down, the front door to her shared home opened, Chuuya had finally gotten off work and he was ready to see his partner after a long day. When he didn’t see (Y/N) in the living room or the kitchen (probably eating an entire bag of chips again) the ginger walked over to (Y/N)‘s gaming/streaming room. The door was closed. Of course she’s streaming right now.

Chuuya went and grabbed a bottle of wine while contemplating if he should order takeout or cook something. While pouring his glass, a victory scream rang out, “TAKE THAT YOU WRINKLY MANAGER! I AM COMPETENT ENOUGH TO STOCK SHELVES!” It came from none other than (Y/N) herself. This made Chuuya chuckle to himself at how immersed his girlfriend could get in a video game.

Unable to decide on takeout or cooking at home, and since he figured that scream meant the stream would be ending, Chuuya waited a few minutes before going to (Y/N)’s room and opening the door to find…her still streaming. He concluded it’d be a good way to scare off any simps from the chat (he’s wrong, we never back down) so he asked what she would prefer for dinner while leaning against the door. (Y/N) snapped out of her surprised stupor and replied, “uh…takeout. You are aware that I’m streaming, right?” “I thought you ended it after that victory scream” this made the female streamer blush from embarrassment, was she really that loud?

Meanwhile, the chat was blowing up

Cryos3267: Who’s the hot guy at the door?

Gumiberry: Is he single?

Kawaii-Chan: if he is, can I have his number

XXJuliusXX: Is he Sera’s boyfriend?

Seweit42: He can’t be, he’s too short for her

Chuuya was going to leave to order takeout for them both until (Y/N) saw that in the chat. She smiled sweetly with malicious intent hidden behind it and called her boyfriend back in. Chuuya, hearing the sickly sweet sound from his girlfriend, walked into the room, silently praying you weren’t about to kill him for interrupting the stream.

(Y/N) looked directly at the camera, “Seweit42, if you really think short guys can’t land hot girls…” the girl pulled Chuuya down by his shirt collar and kissed him, making sure the monitor could see them. Chuuya gladly returned the short kiss until (Y/N) pulled back and looked at the camera “Then explain that.” If chat wasn’t already blowing up, it was now. The female turned back and said, “If you want, you can go order takeout now, I’ll join you after Mr.Hopps Playhouse” but Chuuya just wrapped his arms around her waist, “After that? Like hell I’m leaving.” The girl rolled her eyes, but smiled nonetheless, “Well then, get on the chair, but this is a horror game.” “Like a game could scare me. Who do you think I am, dove?”

Ten minutes later, Chuuya’s trying to convince you that Mr.Hopps is not cute while you’re collecting tapes

Chuuya: it’s a demonic bunny rabbit probably the size of that blond ponytail fucker from the Agency. He’s got the eyes of their doctor when she’s gone batshit

Y/N: Chuuya, don’t you see those adorable, very pettable ears? And those eyes aren’t screaming murder, they’re begging to be loved

Chuuya: quit fucking summoning him with the toys!

Y/N: (proceeds to trigger every single toy) it’s not like he’ll catch me anyways, I’m too good for-

Proceeds to get jumpscared making Chuuya cling to the gamer and spin the chair around, “Fuck that!” (Y/N) looked at her boyfriend, blinked a couple times, and laughed, spinning the chair around while laughing. The short-tempered male was quick to retaliate, “I was trying to protect you from the demon bunny! Don’t laugh at me!” “It’s just…it’s just a video game. Mr.Hopps isn’t real.” The female wiped a tear from her eyes. She was right, he’s just a piece of code in a video game. There wasn’t anything for Chuuya, a mafia executive, to be scared of. It was still funny that he was though.

Soon enough, (Y/N) beat the game and ended the stream. Standing up and stretching, she asked, “So what food are you in the mood for?” But Chuuya was still recovering from the ending, he looked up at his girlfriend, “Y…You pick” “Aight, Chinese sound good?” “Sure” To be honest, Chuuya wasn’t thinking about food, he was still caught on the ending and how you barely flinched at the Giant Mr.Hopps, is it a streamer thing?

“Yo Chu, you good? …Hello? …Oh well, guess I’ll just help myself to the best wine in the cellar!” That snapped him out of it. “Don’t you dare” “Welcome back to planet Earth, Chu. I’m gonna order the food and if you want, we can play Mr.Hopps 2~” (Y/N) whispered the last bit in his ear and Chuuya tensed, “Count me out” He walked to the living room and sat on the couch, flipping through the tv channels.

After placing the order and getting the food, (Y/N) and Chuuya were cuddling on the couch watching Iron Man 3. It was clear that both of you were beginning to get drowsy and so out of nowhere, Chuuya says, “You know, you were really sexy today when you kissed me in front of your fans.” “Thanks Chu, you were really cute today when we played Mr.Hopps. Your reactions were adorable and *yawn* I wouldn’t mind having you join me again.” (Y/N) closed her eyes as she began to doze off. The mafioso smiled at his cute girlfriend, turned the tv off, and carried her to their shared bedroom before crawling in next to her. “I wouldn’t mind it either.” And with that, the ginger fell asleep with a smile on his face.

———————————————————————

This ending was way softer than I expected it to be. Kinda derailed from my original idea

It’s fine though, we all need some Chuuya fluff in our lives

[marsmarvel02]

So, I played Princess Peach: Showtime! last night, and I have some thoughts.

Warning: Spoilers for the entirety of Floor 1 under the cut.

Opening

Wow, the music is good.

I love Grape's design! So... unique!

Grape's name, however, is ... ehh. It could be worse, but I'd still prefer something a bit more intimidating.

Why does Stella have to make crying baby noises when she's upset? It makes it hard to take her seriously and it's honestly just really grating to listen to.

Stella's design, while not the worst thing in the world, just seems a bit... off to me. I can't place it, but something about her just looks... weird.

Why is light magic named "Sparkle"? It just sounds a bit... goofy.

Swordfighter-1

Wow, the loading times for levels are... a bit much.

Why does the "level loading" music have to have that long, low horn that sounds almost exactly like the noise older Nintendo games make when they crash? The first time I heard it, I freaked because I thought there was something wrong with my copy of the game.

Why did they make B the action button and A the jump button? In every other game I've played, B is jump! That button switch has actually made me die a few times in a later level, and generally made me bad at parts that require jumping with quick reflexes.

Wow, this game IS easy.

The pre-transformation sections of levels where you just run around swinging your ribbon at stuff are honestly kinda boring.

Oh man, Swordfighter Peach looks AWESOME!

Again, the game is still really easy, but blasting your way through hordes of Sour Bunch members makes you feel INCREDIBLY powerful.

And I love the acrobatic and flashy dodges too.

Why does the very imposing knight with the hammer go down in one hit? Seriously, all you need to do is jump over his shockwave once and oop, down he goes.

The end boss is CRAZY! Who'd've thought that a Mario (spinoff) game would have you fight a giant killer plant that ISN'T a piranha plant! Also, wow, this random spinoff gets original bosses and Mario Wonder doesn't.

Jokes aside, though, I love the thorny flower bud boss. Does it have a name?

Ninja-1

Normally stealth levels in games are the ones that everybody hates, but honestly this one is GREAT!

Again, the game is still pretty easy, but stealth-attacking enemies and taking them out in one hit also feels POWERFUL.

I love how the guards can't tell where Peach is when she has a freakin' SPOTLIGHT shining on her. Or when she's pressed up against a wall and her GIANT YELLOW PONYTAIL is sticking up above her camo paper.

Why does being spotted make Peach turn into a log and then teleport to just before whatever stealth section you failed? I mean, I get sending you back to try again, but what's with the log? Is it a reference to some ninja trope I'm not familiar with?

Oh man, the chase sequence is SUPERB. Especially the wallrunning bits, and

When the enemy drops one of the scrolls, and Peach somehow uses it to summon a giant wave to ride. It makes no sense, but it's FRICKIN AWESOME.

Honestly, I'd really like it if the wave chase had ended with the enemy dropping a second scroll, and Peach using it to summon another crazy setpiece. (Hey, I just realized, that wave is a "dramatic setpiece" both in-universe and in the video game sense.)

Patissiere-1

Once again, the section before the transformation is... rather slow.

Honestly, I was expecting this to be the "annoying gimmicky minigame level", but I'm pleasantly surprised. It's a gimmicky minigame level, sure, but not an annoying one.

While getting above the minimum required to advance in the cake-decorating and cookie minigames wasn't too hard, I can see that I'll have my work cut out for me when I come back to get all the Sparkle Gems.

This isn't too bad, but it's annoying how in the cookie minigame there isn't any visual indicator that you're about to overmix something.

Cowgirl-1

One word: AWESOME!

Again, the ease at which you can lasso enemies and throw them around makes you feel powerful.

Oh, and that barrel-throwing fight sequence manages to simultaneously be both awesome and hilarious. I don't know why, it's just funny in the best way.

Crazy Thought: Cowgirl Peach tests her barrel-lassoing skills against Donkey Kong.

That horse chase sequence is pretty fun, but it's also where I died a few times because I lassoed when I meant to jump.

And, to top it all off, the boss fight against the leader of the robbers is epic. My only disappointment is that, when he's charging around the arena after you, you can't matador him into those piles of gem boxes landing the first hit revealed. I understand why you can't, but I still wish you could.

Floor 1/First Main Boss

It appears that Peach understands as much as I do that, while forcing open the door that's obviously full of dark magic might be a bad idea, it's also the only way to progress the game.

I'm not sure what to think about the fact that you need Sparkle Gems to open the Spooky Floating Door. I mean, the cost was low enough that it wasn't a problem for me, but I could see it frustrating someone who isn't very good at the game (especially since doors on later floors will probably use the same mechanic), and speedrunners are probably going to HATE it.

Why is the evil version of Sparkle named "Darkle"? It just sounds stupid.

WE'RE FIGHTING A GIANT DISCO CHICKEN!

Oh man, Disco Wing is awesome. Especially the part where THE GRAVITY FRIGGIN' FLIPS UPSIDE DOWN!

It's funny how the only time Disco Wing does that giant rolling attack is when the arena has been changed in a way that makes it possible for Peach to dodge it. Disco Wing, you could've won easily if you'd just done that attack a few times at the start of the fight!

Crazy Thought: Disco Wing meets Hole Punch from Paper Mario: The Origami King.

NINTENDO, I WANNA REFIGHT THE DISCO CHICKEN! LET ME REFIGHT THE DISCO CHICKEN!

So, after fighting Disco Wing I finally checked out the dress shop, and THERE'S A DISCO DRESS! That is DEFINITELY what I'm wearing for the rest of the game (or at least until beating the next floor boss unlocks another crazy dress pattern.)

Disco Wing's boss theme wasn't very disco-y for some rea- WAIT, I JUST CHECKED THE OFFICLIAL SOUNDTRACK AND ALL THE MAIN BOSSES HAVE THE SAME THEME?! Nintendo, WHY??! Now I won't be able to hear Juno Songs make covers for each individual boss!

In conclusion, Showtime! is definitely a straight A of a game so far. If it keeps on being as good as it was, I might even consider pushing its grade up to an A+.

[pixelcurious]

Something that keeps me from enjoying media the way it's meant to be is my damned eye for certain details, like how people on TV will make a date to meet someone but they never say when, other than like "this evening." I know it's just a simplification, it's not relevant information to the narrative, but i can't help but notice. Every time.

That's mildly annoying. Much more annoying is when someone leaves a car door open and just wanders off. This happens a lot on TV! Drives me crazy. I'm yelling at the screen because their car battery is going to run down and then where will they be?

People on TV are constantly taking one or two bites of their meal and never finishing it. They get a coffee and throw it away. Who does that in real life?

Scene from last night -- an assassin comes back to her trailer in the woods. Her door's ajar so she puts her groceries on the ground and enters with her gun drawn. All well and good so far. There's nobody in her trailer, but she finds a package and opens it. It's a, what do you call it... a helmet thing for a VR video game. Which she puts on right away! Hello, your groceries are outside and you live in the frickin woods! They're going to be swarming with ants by the time you get back to them. Not to mention her door is still open. You're telling me an assassin is going to put on a VR headset, cutting herself off from her immediate environment, with her door standing wide open? Do the writers want me to think she's an idiot?

I read a book recently where the protagonist had a pet fish on their spaceship. The narrative mentions feeding the fish multiple times. The protag loves their fish and takes good care of it. Then they park on a planet and stay there for an unspecified number of days but they didn't bring the fish! Is it just abandoned and starving? Granted the protag has a lot to do during this part of the story, but all I could think of was what's happening to the fish? Eventually they wind up in the hospital and then their girlfriend goes back for the fish and is taking care of it. So I know the author didn't just forget, and they could have put in a sentence about fetching the fish from the spaceship earlier. But they didn't. Because it makes more sense apparently that a character you've established as caring for their pet suddenly doesn't think about it for days on end.

See what I mean? Someone should hire me to read stuff and point these things out before publication, so people like me can enjoy media more. It would be a service to the world.

[microscotch]

“I don’t really know what to think anymore. Maxxx is a great guy but he’s so possessive that I just had to make a point, you know?”

“He kinda doesn’t really want to get the message, though...”

-“How about a little exxxtra spice 🔥🔥🔥??”

- “AND TRUST ME, I FRICKIN’ CRUSHED IT THIS MORNING, RIGHT IN FRONT OF MAXXX’S EYES! I’D BE SURPRISED IF SHE’S STILL ABLE TO WA-.”

- “Dude, I SO don’t want to hear about your d-game.” 

“I don’t trust either of them. One day Roz acts all morally superior just ‘cause I was close to crashing my UFO into this hoard of degenerates, and now he brags TO ME about stealing another guy’s girl. Or maybe going for April’s implant ass is his way of dealing with me turning down his hatefuck offer? Whatever complex this qualifies as.”

-”WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING??”

-”Keeping my eyes on your fake ass, literally and figuratively.”

-”Excuse me??? First, there’s nothing fake about daily pilates with Misty Waters. Second, not into girls and third, DON’T STALK ME WHILE YOU’RE TAKING A DUMP.”

“Actually, I just wanted to piss her off.”

-“Drop that hairy piece of filth and be with me, April! We look so much hotter together, plus you can be the no name bimbo breaking my heart in all my music videos once my career really takes off!”

-”Oooo when you put it that way...”

“Maxxx really does know how to charm a girl. Who knows, maybe we truly are meant to be together after all. I mean, if he didn’t care about me, he’d just be looking for another girl as we speak.”

-“Damn April, I gotta give it to you, you really are outdoing everyone in this house!”

-”Embarrassingly low bar, let’s all be honest - I mean, Watcher, I just wasn’t sure about what I wanted. :( ”

-”Pfft, not hard when she’s living with both douchebags.”

-”Jealous much, desert queen Isabella?”

-”I just have class and don’t take every available opportunity because I’m cheap. All that talk about me having dated over 25 football players are just cruel lies!”

-”I haven’t heard anyone talk about it on here besides you-”

-“ALL. THAT. TALK.”

- Um, well, speaking of looking cheap, where’s Angie?”

“Look, the last day really SUCKED for me and I’m just trying to distract myself from the fact the guy of my dreams chose some bimbo who immediately cheated on him over me.”

“Angie is coming into the living room and all of the sudden starts tickling me. Just like the girls during my bartending days, you haven’t spoken a word to me before, neither when I pulled out a BuzzFeed article from 2017 featuring SimNation’s top 50 worst pick-up lines, or when I asked her for a mint to get the taste of vomit out of my mouth yesterday. Just now when you’re lonely and desperate - I suddenly exist!”

-”Get your claws away from me you freak!”

-”Did YOU OUT OF EVERYONE just call me a freak??? And who put that horrid music on, sounds like 8th graders during band rehearsal after discovering MySpace.”

-”You mean my mixtape I’m aggressively dancing to??”

-”WHAT? NO MAXXX, NEVER!!!! YOUR MUSIC CANNOT BE DESCRIBED IN WORDS!!”

-”Cabs are here!”

“I’m meeting up with this girl I ran into at the club yesterday. I just knew the moment I saw her she was something special... reminds me, should ask for her name again.”

“So everyone is having a good time, we’re dancing, it’s great. And suddenly, out of nowhere...she kisses me.”

-“Oh baby, I couldn’t be more turned on by you than right now, in your sweat stained maxis tracksuit.”

-”Let’s take this somewhere more private, shall we? ;)”

“Maxxx and I need to figure out where we’re at. If we really are ready for a relationship together.”

-“April, I love you, but honestly I think only I deserve you, so I’m ready for this relationship thing if that means I won’t be seeing you near these out of your league morons ever again. It’s unbearably insulting to my looks and charm seeing what the guys you decided are my actual competition look like.”

-“Your face looks just like the Sector 6 aliens I would sometimes see on vacation at Sector 8, so grotesquely deformed I always used to wonder how their organs were even remotely working... say, what do you do for a living?”

“Maybe it was the amount of bubbles clouding her judgment or something, but as much as I can’t stand the girl, this was honestly sad to watch.”

-”Performing human experimentation. But my wife and I are certainly not opposed to extending our selection of interesting subjects.”

-”I mean, yeah, it doesn’t have to be a two-men show but that’s one weird metaphor.”

-“It’s official, these clownshows are dating now. But they’re gonna break up so fucking fast, trust me.”

-“I hate them so much.”

“Angie is my only friend in this house, so obviously I had to let her know about everything I just saw. So pathetic.”

-“Maxxx, can I maybe talk to you for a sec?”

-”Angie, look, you’re a nice girl and will surely find someone, but Maxxx doesn’t want anything from you.”

-”NOT THE THIRD PERSON THING AGAIN, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME??”

“It was going great, the girl and I relocated to the hot tub and then... suddenly I see everything flashing white! I just thought “Wow, must be the best woohoo I ever had.” ‘til I realize...”

“I almost died, would you think this chick even moved a muscle? She just sat there grinning, like she was enjoying it. So no idea if we’re dealing with an actual succubus or if she’s just got some crazy fetish.”

“And that’s not even the worst thing that happened.”

-“CRAP!”

-”Crap indeed.”

[lilybug-02]

i would LOVE to hear more about your thoughts on the player-game relationships (and player-kris relationships, and player getting along w others!). frickin ADORE the concepts in the comic and would love to hear your thoughts on everything.

Well I guess you asked for it.

One of the most prominent things I have learned in literature, the arts and even video games is just how attached I can become to the main character(s), as well as the other characters interacting with this character.

It's an interesting phenomenon that many articles have written about. I was skimming through one after I read this ask, titled "A Feeling for Fiction" by Keith Oatley, and I think it analyzes this feeling really well.

"When we watch a film or read a novel, we join ourselves to a character’s trajectory through the story world. We see things from their point of view. These feelings are familiar to us as readers or viewers... When we examine this process of identification in fiction, we appreciate the importance of empathy"

Empathy, I think, is such a vital part to many stories. UT/DR are great examples of this and this theme definitely influences my comic. You can say that it is all technically code and/or lines on a page, but that doesn't matter! What matters is how you feel and how your empathy and humanity bring them to life in your mind. And in someway, on a some level, by empathizing with them you can become apart of that world too.

[thelovesickbakery]

i hope it's ok to send im forms rn!! if not just disregard this :3

♡ ⸺ Name: alice

♡ ⸺ Birthday: 09/09/2003

♡ ⸺ Age: 20

♡ ⸺ Gender Identity & Pronouns: transgender male, he/him

♡ ⸺ Sexuality: homosexual polyamorous

♡ ⸺ I am (Yandere/Non-Yandere): i'm a yandere and a darlin, currently just lookin for a yandere :3 i do love reciprocatin emotions so!! u will not be without my love nd affection <33

♡ ⸺ Looking for (Friendship/Romance): either works!!

♡ ⸺ Looking for a (Yandere/Non-Yandere): yandere preferably but non-yanderes are cool too!! ^.^/

♡ ⸺ Thinking of a friend/romantic partner, I am looking for: i'm not vry picky but. men/masculine-aligned gender identities only pls!! unless u just wanna be friends, also pls be willin to play video games together that's how i bond best!!

♡ ⸺ Small details about myself (interests and love language, for example): i rly like minecraft and stardew valley, i watch a lot of rick and morty, family guy, lucky star, etc. i msotly just play video games nd i'm currwntly in full-time therapy (mon-fri 9:00am-2:30pm)!! i'm an alter human (specifically undead vampiric fallen angel) nd i'm a system of 13 alters!! my love language is usually thru words, but i frickin loove physicalt affection/roleplayed affection!!

♡ ⸺ Extra information: i included a lot in the last bullet point so idk what to add here!!

♡ ⸺ Contact information: message me on here (@urdarlingangel) or shoot me a message on discord (urdigitalangel)!!

—♡—

[There are no closures on the period in which forms can be applied, so feel most free to submit them at any time, as I will publish them as soon as possible!]

[anditvanisheslikemist]

Literally everything you write with sick Ian is great so that’d be my preference!

Thank you for the prompt!!

(re: this post... and the offer still stands if anyone else wants to make a request!)

Set at some point after this angsty thing. Here's the link to all of the World Above stuff. :-)

You can read this fic below or on AO3.

. . . . .

"How was the show?" Josh leans his head back against the couch, and Finley takes the opportunity to shove his nose into Josh's face and start licking him enthusiastically.

"Finn! Hiii, puppy," Ian coos.

Josh laughs. "Yeah, he's always gonna win out, huh?"

"Mm, maybe." Ian turns away from the camera to cough.

Kate comes around the back of the couch to get in frame as well. "Hi, Ian."

"Kate!" Ian's eyes light up, but his voice wavers a little bit when he says, "Ah, I miss you guys."

"We miss you too." Kate tips her head against Josh's and frowns a little. "You okay? You look really tired."

"Yeah." Ian rolls his shoulders and grimaces. "I dunno. I used to be better at sleeping in motels. Or tour buses, god."

"Or that frickin' van?" Josh raises his eyebrows.

"I do not miss that," Ian agrees, and turns aside to cough again.

The stove timer beeps, and Kate sits back up. "Ah, I've got to get that. Take care of yourself, okay?"

Ian nods, still coughing, and waves as she heads for the kitchen.

"Ian," Josh says, in a way that's synonymous with oh, buddy.

"I'm okay." He's sounding kind of hoarse. "It was loud at the bar."

"Hmm."

Ian scrunches up his nose, then scrubs at it with his fist, but he can't stop it when his breath catches and builds into a strong h'ET-schiew! "Oh," he mutters, scrubbing at his nose some more. "Fuck."

"Bless you."

Ian groans and lets himself fall sideways onto the pillows of his motel bed.

"I have to play tomorrow." Now that he's started, he can't stop sniffling.

"Not if you're sick, you don't."

"Not sick," he says, but it's more of a pout than anything.

"It's not like before," Josh says gently, running a hand through Finley's fur. They'd played through all kinds of shit. Before. He wonders if it'll ever go back to being like that, or if this is just how it's going to be from now on.

"I know." Ian scrubs at his nose with the flat of his palm. "I just…" He shakes his head, not meeting Josh's eyes through the phone.

Josh gives him a minute. "Yeah?"

"I just thought we'd all be here together." His sniffle this time is emotion as much as illness. "I mean, not here in this motel playing at some random bar. But like." He bites his lip. "Here."

"I know." They'd been working on it, slowly and uncertainly. And then the whole world had shut down. He wants to tell Ian that it'll happen, that they can try again at trying again, even after all this time. There are just too many unknowns. The state of the world, for one. And the fact that they've all got stuff going again. Danny's producing out in Oakland. Lauren's started streaming online, sometimes music and sometimes video games and sometimes just talking about whatever's on her mind. Nate and Ellie are having another baby. Josh had moved his guitar lessons to Zoom and for the most part kept them there, and the idea of leaving the safety of his life with Kate and Finn to go back out on the road seems too overwhelming to even think about right now.

Ian, though. Ian's never been good at staying in one place. He'd gone back to touring as soon as it was reasonably safe. He's happier now, for sure, but sometimes just as lonely as when he'd been stuck in his apartment. More so, given how many roommates he'd been squeezed in with at the time.

"Hey," Josh says, gentle. "Tell me about the show."

That gets him a little bit of a smile. "It was good." He swipes at his nose with the back of his hand. "There were these girls who drove three hours to come."

"Wow."

"Yeah. And I wrote some new stuff." He shrugs, suddenly shy. "It went over pretty good."

"Send it to me, I want to hear it." For so long, Josh would've been there, in the hotel room and the tour bus, hearing the song come together bit by bit, rather than hearing about it after the fact.

"Okay." It's just a whisper. There are tears in Ian's eyes. Finn whines at the phone and tries to lick the screen.

"You're getting puppy kisses from Finley."

"Thanks, Finn." He sniffs, and coughs, and rubs at his forehead.

"How're you feeling? Seriously," he adds, when it looks like Ian's going to say he's fine.

Ian shrugs. "Like I'm getting sick." He coughs again. "I don't know. My head hurts. And my throat."

"Do you feel like you have a fever?" If he does, it's low. He's not glassy-eyed and rosy-cheeked, he's just exhausted and sniffly and sad. Past experience says he's hanging out somewhere right around the tipping point between warm and feverish.

Ian considers for a second, and then shivers. "I'm kinda cold. A little achy, maybe."

"Get under the covers."

"It's too early to go to…hhh…k'TCHHH! to go to sleep." He wriggles around anyway until the comforter's pulled up to his chin. He absentmindedly wipes his nose on it and Josh flinches.

"You're the reason I don't trust hotel sheets."

"Oh. Sohhh… h'NGT!choo…" Caught in the bedding again. He doesn't finish the apology, just sort of stares into the middle distance past the phone.

"Bless you." Josh sighs. "Okay, who's letting tomorrow's venue know you're out, you or me?"

"No," Ian says, voice wavering again.

"Yes." This move from Ian like he's pushing his forehead into his pillows, and Josh knows that if Ian were here he'd be doing that move against Josh's shoulder right now. "I can do it. The info's in your business email?" Josh has had access for years, but it's been a while since he needed to step in.

Ian nods miserably. "And we need to get you a test— yes, even if you're sure that's not what this is— and some groceries, and meds, some nice tissues. And extend your motel reservation."

Kate's been listening from the kitchen, and she comes to sit on the couch with Josh and Finley. "We've got it, Ian. Text me your grocery requests."

"I'll do the reservation at the same time I call the venue," Josh says. It's the sort of thing that would have sent him anxiety-spiraling five years ago. Now, here at home with Kate and Finn, it feels easy. An act of love.

"I can't." Ian's shaking a little bit, now; exhaustion and frustration and that little bit of fever.

"It's okay." Kate's voice is reassuring. "Having to cancel for being even just a little sick is just part of the deal now. Everyone will understand."

The kitchen timer goes off again and Kate gets up to turn off the stove and put the finishing touches on dinner.

"We'll work on all that," Josh says. "Call me back in an hour or two if you want."

"Okay." Now that he's under the covers, his eyes are starting to close.

"I think Lauren's streaming tonight, so if you can't get her on the phone you can always show up in the chat."

Ian laughs at that. It turns into a cough. "Everyone always freaks out when I do that."

"The best medicine." For Ian, it really is. He needs attention the way a plant needs water and sunlight. It's not an insult, it's just the truth: he wilts and fades without it, and when he gets it again, he straightens up. Fills out. Comes back to life.

"Hmm." Ian's already perking up a little bit at the thought. "I guess I could do that."

"Good." More screen kisses from Finn. "Finley says he loves you. Talk to you soon."

"Okay." A small but genuine smile. "Thanks, Josh."

He smiles back. "Any time."