#how about a cherry devil fruit. or a strawberry.

[kakushusband]

Did some research and from what I can tell every shown devil fruit is the size of like, a mango or bigger... Hm.... That's kinda silly

[gatorbites-imagines]

please pretty please good sir, please right an imagines of Kurt Wagner with a demon, like full on demon from like the Bible s/o, like straight up like a prince of hell kind of demon.

p.s. I love your fics sm 💐🌅

Kurt Wagner x Demon male reader

Headcanons

Did you guys know that in olden time, people thought owls and toads were linked to the devil? Was this an excuse to give the reader animal characteristics? Yes, yes it was. Fruits like strawberries and cherries were also used to symbolize different more bodily involved sins. I took a bit of inspo to how the demons look in Dictionnaire Infernal, since they’re cool and goofy.

I may still be tired and wrung out from all my classes, but the will to write lives on. How’s everyone’s week been?

No one had known you were a demon in the beginning. Everyone just kind of assumed you were another mutant. They already had one member of the x-men who had wings, so it wasn’t the wildest thought that you were like warren.

Your wings were a bit more like an eagle owl, and sure, sometimes your eyes would morph into something like a toad or even a goat, but they had seen much weirder.

You not stepping inside churches or other holy areas was mainly seen as a personal preference, since you were so casual about it. you technically could step inside the buildings, but it was too much work to be worth it for you.

Instead you’d hang out outside with the others who didn’t feel a need to step inside. And yeah, you may have carved a sigil or two into the building behind your back, so you could teleport there in the future to cause some trouble if you got bored.

Demons had no specific form, at least your father didn’t and so you didn’t. you simply morphed into the one that felt most comfortable, making most believe you had a shapeshifting mutation.

There were multiple kings of hell, but your father had always been the most powerful and most influential, so you were expected to follow in his footsteps, which was why you had kind of ran away to earth.

It was just so boring, sitting there and doing all that kingly work so your father could retire with the other ancient kings, since demons don’t die, they can simply only be ignored and rebutted.

You had never meant to help the x-men or join them, but they’d been there at the right place at the wrong time, and just happened to catch some human trying to assault you for being a “mutant”

It was only the x-men stepping in that kept you from trapping the guy in eternal damnation, but you decided why not just play along for now, see where it takes you. And before you knew it, you were an x-men, helping to “fight for the good of mutant kind” or whatever.

It wasn’t hard to make you seem like a mutant, for you to even show up when Charles was looking for mutants with his powers.

It was all good and dandy, until that furry blue bastard wormed his way into the six pitch black organs you called your hearts. Well, sometimes it was six, sometimes twenty, sometimes zero, it really depended on the day.

But it was six the day you realized Kurt had gotten into your good graces. More than that honestly, as he made you feel… flustered. How he succeeded in making a demon like yourself flustered was still a mystery to you.

You had been drawn to him in the beginning because of his whole “blue demon” thing, only for it to turn out that Kurt was religious, and would sometimes wear a cross. He even prayed at times, the action always making your skin itch.

Kurt was honestly the only one to start putting things together since he knew some about demonology, hell, your name was just a shortened version of your infernal title. Weaker demons showing up and groveling at your feet and referring to you as their prince probably didn’t help.

Luckily it had just been Kurt around at the time, but the blue imp clocked you quicker than you thought they would.

Surprisingly, Kurt didn’t hate you or fear you. To him, you were an x-men and helped save people, so you weren’t fully bad. He even went out of his way to pray somewhere else so your hands wouldn’t burn and for your wings to start burning at the edges.

Somewhere along the way, what you had morphed into more than just a friendship. You had an inkling that your father would have your hide when he realized you had bedded a mortal, and one so clearly meant for heaven when the day came.

But eternity was so long, so who could blame you for wanting to spend it with someone as kind as Kurt. Even if you knew somewhere deep inside, that you would mourn Kurt for most of that eternity when the time came.

Kurt talked you into telling the x-men your true origin. They were hurt in the beginning, and you politely stepped out of the team since you technically weren’t a mutant, and you wanted to respect that.

That didn’t stop you from hanging out at the mansion, or on Krakoa when that came around. How you got on the island? You would never tell, mainly because it drove Scott crazy that he could never figure it out.

After coming out of the hellfire closet, you felt less need to control your form to the same degree. To most you were still just a mutant, since the body you wore the most had been a mutant, so… it counted in a loophole kinda way.

Everyone got good at clocking who you were, even on days when you altered your shape completely. Kurt was obviously the best. Even on days where you had a lion head and the tail of a snake, or when you had three heads and a burning crown.

It was a little awkward when Kurt became a priest and built his own religion like thing, mainly because you just couldn’t get yourself to touch him when he wore the uniform.

It was the aura for the most part. None of the others got it, or saw it like you did, but they weren’t demons, so it made sense. But Kurt always carried an aura, and it was manageable enough on regular days. But after sermons it just got strong enough to make your tongue buzz and your feathers puff up.

Kurt got good at wiping himself off in a metaphorical way, so you guys could kiss and cuddle even on days he did sermons. And you as a demon were way too strong to truly to hurt by it, it just got a bit annoying sometimes.

All in all, you two were happy. Even if you had to chase away demons that wanted to take over earth every now and then. Your father had never given you your own domain, so you just kinda slapped your name on earth and told every other demon to square up for it.

Some did come out of the woodwork to fight, mainly just because they could. No one really wanted earth. Too much trouble, too much holy interference, and all those magicians? No way. It was just older demons wanting a good fight for the most part.

Kurt also came to really like your less human look. Maybe he was projecting, but there was something nice about having a partner that didn’t look too “human”, if he could say that without being offensive.

There were days where you looked like the average human man. But other days you were more beast than man, or even the days where you didn’t even want a blood-filled body, so you were made out of sand or water, or anything along those lines.

He did have a preference for forms where you had a tail, because it was comforting to coil your tails together. Or if the form you took had claws, since it felt so good to have your hands rubbing up and down his back and scratch through his fuzz.

There were times when Kurt forgot to take off his cross, or hide it under his shirt, so you did get small burns, even if they went away in a few seconds. You didn’t care much, but seeing Kurt apologize was always very cute.

Having a powerful demon like you on the side of the x-men also helped out a lot during fights. You stayed out of it for the most part, to “keep balance of the mortal plane” or whatever your father said.

There were times when Kurt was in mortal danger where you stepped in though, but you always contained the worst of your powers.

And staying back also meant you could focus your powers on healing those that needed it. Kurt got the most of it, of course, as you would cuddle and kiss him, your kisses transferring the healing energy instead.

It was nice. And yes, you knew one day you’d be alone again, stuck on earth after claiming it as your territory. But the present was so good, so warm and loving, that the cold empty future didn’t matter.

[cerezzzita]

Hi, i saw you have your request open so here i go, requesting some hcs for Dante, Vergil and Trish having a short sweet-toothed s/o who also loves to bake.

notes: heeey there, anon! In advance sorry for the waiting, it took long enough but at least here we are! I hope you like it, because I surely did loved writing these headcanons, and with Trish being included? Better than ever!

Enjoy the reading and thanks for requesting! <3

⠀🍓 ˖ . ᵎᵎ Dante, Vergil & Trish with a short sweet-toothed S/O

♡ tags: gender-neutral reader, no use of pronouns (you/yours only), no description of reader's appearance, short!reader, use of petnames, three devils being soft af, Vergil and Trish might have been sorta ooc pardon in advance.

ⓘ gif's not mine!!

Dante

Perfect match, to be honest.

Calls you "shortcake" or "shortie" most of the time and if you're annoyed by that… he'll keep doing it, sorry. He loves you enough to annoy you as well. 

Being as sweet-toothed as he is, no wonder he'll ask you constantly to make some desserts with strawberries or red fruits in general such as raspberries or cherries. 

And please don't let Dante get one inch near the kitchen, this man will eat as many of the berries plus he's catastrophic at cooking.

At least let him add some of the ingredients and mix them together here and there, he'll be satisfied and happy enough. 

He'll eat the batter when you're not looking, by the way. 

Still on the ingredients topic, doesn't this bitch (affectionately) loves when you ask him for help to reach something you can't? He's all smugly smirks, towering you with that huge figure of his and in the best of the cases, lifting you so you can reach it by yourself. 

Dante's personal favorite dessert made by you became The Devil's Cake, but instead of being fulfilled of chocolate only, there's lots and lots of strawberry jam and fresh strawberries on top of it. 

Late night munchies are a must! You two can and will be watching whatever series or movies while cuddling and devouring almost all of a whole damn bakery because Dante has a black hole instead of a regular stomach. 

Saw a recipe for dessert pizza once, got obsessed with it, asked you to make it, you made it, he's even more in love with you. 

"Babe, you're a sweetheartie. A candy angel, I love you so much," said Dante, mouth full of sweet pizza and eyes full of tears of joy and passion. 

ⓘ gif's not mine!!

Vergil

Vergil strikes me as a cinnamon roll enjoyer. That's it, that's the post. 

But really, I don't think he has a sweet-tooth or enjoys sugary foods that much. He likes it, sure, but at moderate bits. 

Unlike Dante, he does not make fun of your height… Yet he finds it quite endearing. 

Calls you "little bird". Let me have him be affectionate and lovely for a sec, okay? 

Vergil also gets worried by the amount of sugar you consume. 

"You'll get plenty of cavities if you keep eating desserts at that level." 

He helps you with your recipes too. I'm kinda sure that Vergil knows a thing or two in the cooking field, correct me if I'm wrong (I am wrong). 

As previously said, he likes more, hm, refined flavors, such as cinnamon and vanilla and if you're baking cinnamon rolls, count him on it! 

Don't ask Vergil to chop the ingredients unless you want him to put on a show about it. 

If you like drinking tea, you better prepare a bunch of sweet treats because you're having regular, calm silent tea evenings ft. Vergil and his poetry book. 

ⓘ gif's not mine!!

Trish

Oh my, what can I say about Trish?

She's not a sugary-sweet person. Instead, she's mostly on sour candies and neutral fruits field. 

With that being said, I hope you're ready to constantly bake lemon pies and banana cakes. 

Trish does not know how to cook for her dear life, she prefers watching you instead and maybe teasing you along with it.

"Trish, I could use a little hand." "Pardon me if I can't help but think you're all cute on your own, sugar."

Speaking of teasing, this devil surely knows how to make you fluster with her little comments about your height, but of course, always keeping it comfortable enough to not get you mad or sad. 

"Need some help there, honeypie?" "My, if you ever get trouble reaching that shelf, you need to wear some of my heels."

And although Trish is not your sous chef, she is certainly your personal tasting critic, which is an advantage mostly to her. 

"So, what do you think?" "Hm, I liked the caramel on top of the fruit, and it's sour just in the way I love. It's a ten out of ten, honey." 

Brought you some silly clothes like sweaters and shirts with some candy motif and oh, sure, fruity flavored lip gloss. 

Anything for her honeybun~

cerezzzita©, 2023 · all rights reserved ⓘ do not edit, copy, steal or claim as yours | reblogs and comments are appreciated!

[asmo-cosmetics]

brothers + smoking hcs

because like, they're vices, i bet they have vices, y'know?

lucifer

genuine cuban cigars. barbatos has had them imported from the human world for him ever since diavolo found out about the habit.

he still finds it embarrassing, of course, but they are very good quality cigars. he doesn't have it in him to refuse.

he keeps two, wrapped, in the inside breast pocket of his coat. if you see him taking one from there (rather than the cigar box that sits eternally beside the gramophone in his bedroom), you know something particularly heinous just happened.

he keeps his lighter in that pocket, too. it's a zippo-style refillable, sterling silver and engraved with his name and the demon lord's crest.

another gift from diavolo. again, it's just excellent quality. the fact that it rests over his heart nearly at all times is incidental.

mammon

blacks, almost exclusively.

-- is what he says. they're menthol blacks, but he's old enough to remember when menthols were marketed primarily to women in the human world, and he's still kind of embarrassed about his "girl" cigarettes.

they're a devildom brand, but don't get it twisted, he still prefers the most expensive variety they have.

he also likes those flavored cigarillos, the cherry or honey ones, usually.

(there's also a demonus flavor in some stores. he loves those.)

leviathan

prefers weed.

is one of those guys who is really annoying about the fact that he prefers weed.

to be fair, this is probably mostly to annoy mammon.

probably has a vape pen and an online store he likes that does those dumb cartoon-themed carts but with like. nostalgic anime.

but... it's levi. so, like... bongs.

no, but it's levi, so seriously like a legit kind of impressive collection of custom bongs purchased directly from the glassblower's akuzon page.

one of them looks like ruri-hana's flower staff.

def one of those guys who can explain to you in scientific detail how all that shit works, too.

"but what's he like high" giggly. more talkative. fascinated by everything. really honest.

he'll have cigarettes sometimes. usually when he's lonely and he wants something that smells like his brothers.

satan

he grows, prepares, and blends everything he smokes himself. everything he blends smells fucking divine.

usually uses a pipe, but he has an antique hookah from the human world that he'll get out on occasion. also not opposed to rolling clove cigarettes if he finds good rolling papers.

(levi gets him those sometimes. in return for satan rolling joints for him because he can't roll for shit and satan's are always perfect.)

the pipe is a sherlock holmes replica. it was a gift from barbatos. he treasures it.

sometimes he'll infuse magic into a blend, usually for hookah sessions with other people. with satan, you can smoke a memory, or the sound of a string quartet, or an entire ballet.

but usually, it's just a taste to fit the book he's reading. some go best with an apple cider feel, you know?

asmodeus

he used to get those little disposable vapes all the time, but eventually levi felt bad and helped him pick out a permanent one.

his juice is like. all fruit and sweets and candy flavors. he has one that tastes like vanilla cupcakes that everyone likes the smell of.

also maybe this is kind of a pull but you know that brand black devil? that makes the strawberry cigarettes with the pink paper? yeah.

looong black audrey hepburn cigarette holder. he has a little collection, actually, because, well, they're accessories, but the black one is his favorite. it's elegant and cool and looks sexy in pictures.

beelzebub & belphegor

beel doesn't really smoke unless belphie's smoking, and belphie usually just steals from his brothers.

he has a brand of reds he likes but he mostly relies on someone else picking them up for him because he is Too Lazy to go to the store.

beel actually likes the taste of asmo's best, but the reds are still his favorite because they smell/taste the most like belphie.

belphie's favorite are actually a blend satan makes and rolls for him to help him sleep.

[firstaidspray]

OC Interviews

I was tagged by @corvosattano to do this fun lil game with some ocs!! Thank you!! Here you will find some info you probably don't need to know about Bianca, Anabel, Nonia, and Carmine!!

Name: Bianca Andretti

Nickname: Bee (given to her by Holland in Nice Guys verse, given to her by Bennett in all other), BB/Bibi (stands for “Better Barbie,” given to her by Ken in her Barbie verse)

Gender: Girl

Star Sign: Pisces sun, Cancer Moon and Rising

Height: 5’1

Orientation: Bi

Nationality/Ethnicity: From US with Italian and Mexican heritage.

Fave Fruit: Bananas. Especially in combination with strawberry.

Fave Season: Spring!! When all the winter is going away, new green grass and plants begin to grow back, baby animals being born…new beginnings!!

Fave Flower: Lily of the valley and bluebells!! 

Fave Scent: Normal smells that normal people like I'd say vanilla, lemon, and lavender. Weirdo smells that Bianca loves would be fuel (gasoline, racing, diesel), the smell of mechanic (iykyk), and antiseptic.

Coffee, Tea, or HC: None!! Bianca is an energy drink person.

Average Hours of Sleep: While working as a nurse, Bianca can get anywhere from 12 to 3 hours of sleep, depending on her shifts. When she stops working in some verses, I'd say like averaging on 9.

Dog or Cat Person: Bianca likes all animals, but she's more of a dog person. Something about the stereotypical loyalty of a dog. And I'm toying with the idea of giving her, Holland, and Holly a dog in the Nice Guys Verse!!

Dream Trip: Japan!! She loves the culture, legitimately and not in a weeaboo way, and while she can take a trip to Little Tokyo any time, it's certainly not the same.

Favourite Fictional Character: Ironically, Barbie. That's why she dyed her hair blonde in the first place!! That's also why it's exceptionally funny that she has a Barbie verse in which Ken refers to her as “Better Barbie.”

Number of Blankets They Sleep With: Usually just one, unless she's absolutely freezing. Or if her partner wants a second one.

Random Fact: It's ambiguous to the audience, the characters, and to me whether or not Bianca actually has family in the mafia. It's kind of a running joke. I like to keep it a mystery to even myself. The answer is probably no, but she may lie about it for kicks. If she is lying…

Name: Anabel Lee

Nickname: Bel, Queen of the Hells, The Devil's Bride

Gender: Girl

Star Sign: Aquarius sun, Cancer moon, Sagittarius rising

Height: 5’1

Orientation: Bi

Nationality/Ethnicity: Tiefling?? If that's what an ethnicity is in BG3 LMAOOO

Fave Fruit: She will go so crazy for some cherries. 

Fave Season: Summer!! It's warm, it's free, it's the time of year to wear revealing clothing!! 

Fave Flower: Spider lilies! I'm sure there are more exotic flowers in the DnD world, but of this world she'd love spider lilies.

Fave Scent: Cherry, smoke, apple cinnamon, and Raphael's perfume.

Coffee, Tea, or HC: Tea, although she doesn't drink it too often.

Average Hours of Sleep: While adventuring around Faerun it was probably like 6 or less, but now with Raph she sleeps as much as she wants. 12+ if she so chooses.

Dog or Cat Person: Both, but cats slightly more. They fit her vibe more.

Dream Trip: I don't know about every location in the Forgotten Realms (still learning lol) but she definitely wants to explore every horrible inch of the Hells with Raphael.

Favourite Fictional Character: I don't know what kind of fictional characters are in DnD, but I think she'd love Betty Boop in our world.

Number of Blankets They Sleep With: None. It's hot in Hell, and you've seen how they sleep in this game. No blankets like weirdos.

Random Fact: In her original verse, Anabel was an angel that got kicked out of heaven because she was so annoying, and the piercings she has are shards of her halo.

Name: Nonia Fonzarelli

Nickname: Buttercup (Reese's peanut buttercup, get it??), Fonzie, Nonnie (she hates this one)

Gender: Girl

Star Sign: Cancer sun, Pisces moon and rising

Height: 5’1

Orientation: Bi

Nationality/Ethnicity: From US with Italian/Indigenous/Mexican heritage

Fave Fruit: Limes and lemons. Give her citrus any day. Give her a Corona and she will drink it with the lime then eat the lime.

Fave Season: Summer!! Racing season is at its peak, it’s warm, there’s a lot of fun to be had in summer. 

Fave Flower: Buttercup, daffodil, and anything yellow.

Fave Scent: Leather, cigarette smoke, Reese’s cologne, fuel (gasoline, diesel, racing), the smell of mechanic (iykyk)

Coffee, Tea, or HC: Coffee if she has to choose, but she'd rather not have a hot drink.

Average Hours of Sleep: About 7 to 10.

Dog or Cat Person: Dogs!! They just fit her personality and she has always loved them. I kind of want her and Reese to adopt a mixed breed herding dog when they're ready.

Dream Trip: A Route 66 roadtrip!! All the sightseeing, all the driving…it will be so fun!! (I would know I've been on one)

Favourite Fictional Character: Tweety Bird!! She's a huge Loony Tunes fan, and Tweety has been her favorite since childhood.

Number of Blankets They Sleep With: One or two, and she always needs separate ones from her partner or she’ll take it. Reese doesn't really like Blankets anyway so he's okay with it.

Random Fact: Nonia doesn't just love driving cars, she also loves riding dirtbikes!! She always used to with her dad before her parents moved back to New Jersey.

Name: Carmine Ferrari

Nickname: Carm

Gender: Man

Star Sign: Sagittarius sun, Leo moon, Virgo rising

Height: 6'1

Orientation: Bi

Nationality/Ethnicity: From Canada living in Italy with mixed Italian heritage

Fave Fruit: Oranges!! Give that boy an orange and he will be so happy.

Fave Season: Fall!! A transition to another season, it can be cool or warm, and it's spooky season!!

Fave Flower: Moon flowers!! He didn't know what they were until Fiona showed him and now they're his favorite.

Fave Scent: Lavender, rosemary, chamomile, antiseptic, Fiona's perfume

Coffee, Tea, or HC: Coffee and hot chocolate!! But to be fair, the way he makes coffee is basically hot chocolate anyway...

Average Hours of Sleep: As a med student, it was rare and very short bursts of sleep. Now with a degree and a job, he's working to where he can get at least 8 hours.

Dog or Cat Person: He was one of those "on the fence" people until he met Hewie, now he's team dog all the way.

Dream Trip: Taking Fiona back to his home in Canada. It's not very exciting, but it's pretty different from life in Italy and England she's used to.

Favourite Fictional Character: I want to be very silly and say Jill Valentine. He's a Capcom (fan) character so making him have a Capcom fav is funny, especially since Fiona resembles RE5 Jill and that Haunting Ground was scraps of RE4.

Number of Blankets They Sleep With: Just one, and Fiona tends to steal it, but he doesn't mind

Random Fact: Collects old anatomy books and posters. Fiona thinks it's a bit creepy, but he really finds them interesting.

[handeaux]

Remember When A Monfort Heights Literary Society Spawned A Township War?

Those Cincinnatians who live outside the West Side may not even know how to locate Monfort Heights on a map in the northern ranges of Green Township. It is still a fairly quiet place, almost 150 years after the Cincinnati Gazette [11 June 1879] effused about its Edenic qualities:

“As is well known, if Arcadia yet exists of earth, Green Township has long been the English for it. Here bloomed the apple and cherry, and pear, and quince, and raspberry, and strawberry, and currant, and gooseberry . . . [You get the idea.] Here strife was unknown, the only rivalry between the men being as to who should raise the largest fruit for exhibition at the annual festival, and between the women, as to who should make the most impossible patchwork bed quilts for exhibition thereat. The rude world has here made no inroads upon the rustic tongue of truth and affection.”

In 1877, the rude world did make an inroad into idyllic Green Township in the form of a saloon, plopped right into the center of Monfort Heights. At that time, 50 years before an incursion of suburban tract homes inspired the adoption of a more marketable name, Monfort Heights was known as Gans’ Corners, after the Gans family that owned all the land surrounding the intersection of North Bend Road and Pleasant Ridge (now West Fork) Road.

It wasn’t so much the saloon itself that caused the kerfuffle. As saloons go, it was a reasonably sedate operation with none of the notoriety of the devil dens down the road in Cheviot. No, the impetus for the dispute was a literary society.

Until the saloon arrived, the only public buildings out at Gans’ Corners were a run-down schoolhouse and a Methodist church. Around the time the saloon made its debut, a new, two-story school building was erected, designed so that the upper room could accommodate meetings of a cultural and social nature. The local literary society was delighted. According to the Gazette:

“The Acme Literary Society filled up the upper room with stage, curtains, chairs, and other necessary furniture. It also graded and macadamized a road from the pike to the schoolhouse door, and set out a score or more of shade trees in the yard. In fact, the society seemed to comprise the only persons in the neighborhood of the Corners who took a practical interest in the school property, till within the last few weeks.”

The Acme Literary Society was enormously popular in that isolated rural neighborhood. An estimated 80 members gathered each Monday evening for reading, singing and recitations. All was well until someone in the Methodist Church invited John Rudel of Lockland to address the congregation. Rudel was the dynamic leader of the local Sons of Temperance organization. Temperance proved to be a popular topic, and the Acme Literary Society followed by inviting Samuel F. Black, a Cincinnati attorney active in the temperance movement. It was Black’s appearance that agitated the pro-saloon faction, according to the Gazette:

“Black animadverted pretty severely upon the Germans bringing Germany into America in the manner of their drunken customs, etc. The avowed design of the temperance meetings was to close up the saloon aforementioned at the Corners.”

A glance at a Nineteenth-Century map of the Gans’ Corners environs finds enough names along the lines of Haeffner, Beischel, Getzendanner, Kraus and the like to suggest that this anti-German rhetoric did not receive unanimous approbation among the neighbors. The Deutschland element and their friends who appreciated a mug of suds began to ask why the schoolhouse supported by their tax dollars was sheltering a cadre of radicals out to infringe upon their freedoms.

At the next election for the local school board (Rural District 8), the pro-saloon faction supported an apparently neutral candidate who, immediately upon election, voted to kick the Acme Literary Society out of the new schoolhouse. The society immediately appealed to the Green Township Board of Education, of which the rural districts were subsidiary. The township board passed a resolution allowing local societies of a literary or cultural nature to meet in the rural schoolhouses.

It was a hollow victory because, although the township board had the authority, the local rural board had the keys. When the Acme Literary Society appeared at the door of Rural Schoolhouse Number 8, they found two-thirds of the local school board barring the way, accompanied by a number of younger, tougher farmhands who may or may not have inspired themselves with a visit to the local saloon. Per the Gazette:

“Among the first of the members of the society to endeavor to gain admission to the hall were three or four ladies [who] made very earnest and forcible speeches to the two Directors, telling them with a vigor and a force of language and energy of expression befitting their sense of the guilt and meanness of the course pursued by the two aforesaid members of the board.”

When one of their husbands joined the fray, announcing that such obstreperous behavior might well be acceptable in Germany but would not fly in these United States, the two board members signaled their minions, who produced truncheons and advanced upon the literati of Gans’ Corners. It was only the intervention of William Gosling, president of the Acme Literary Society, that circumvented violence at the schoolhouse door. Gosling appealed to his neighbors to act like neighbors, return to their homes and find the best lawyers available to file neighborly lawsuits against each other.

The next showdown took place, ironically, at a saloon. The Seven-Mile House in Cheviot (located on the grounds now occupied by Cheviot School) was indeed a saloon and also a convenient meeting place for the Green Township Board of Education, who would rather have been doing nearly anything else other than listening to the yammering of a bunch of farmers from out at Gans’ Corners.

The arguments were tedious and inane. The pro-saloon faction claimed that the Acme Literary Society caused untold wear and tear to the brand-new schoolhouse by walking up and down the stairs and by parking their buggies in the front yard where the horses could nibble and trample the grass.

The height of absurdity was reached by one of the pro-saloon board members, Joseph Eply, who failed to arouse any sympathy at all by itemizing all the vituperation directed at his good name and then attempted to apologize for one untoward comment that he had unleashed in his frustration.

One of Eply’s neighbors claimed that he was standing nearby and could attest that the foul utterance never escaped the board member’s lips. Eply rose in fury and, according to the Gazette [14 July 1879] erupted in an outburst of righteous indignation:

“Mr. Eply then insisted that he did say it, and became so enraged at the young man for attempting to take away from him the glory of saying this thing that he was sorry he had said; that he claimed the young man had called him a liar, which he had not, and he was proceeding to explain that he was not afraid of anybody, etc., etc., etc., when Mr. [Harvey] Orr called the President’s attention to the fact that this oratory, while it might be highly entertaining and all that, was not expediting business any, and the board returned to business.”

The Acme Literary Society was left to find other places to meet, the saloon prevailed and was soon joined by a few competitors. Fifty years later, in 1928, Green Township begged for a levy to replace the decrepit old schoolhouse that had caused such a commotion years ago at Gans’ Corners.

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

Cherries

Context: Prequel to Raspberries.

Every relationship has its shippers and anties.

Theirs is no exception.

Although, they are not in a relationship. Not like that. Worse.

Donna is the toxic kind of shipper.

Her rooting for them is based on tormenting Carmy.

Like in cartoons when that little mischievous devil on the shoulder encourages the character to succumb to temptation. Just like that. And she's devilishly good at it too.

“Bear! Is Cindy gonna be just your business partner? Or... because I saw how you looked at her and what's worse, I've seen the way she looks at you…”

“How is that worse?”

“Oh, Carmy!.. You have no idea what a woman can do when she sees her man fooling around with his ex, right?”

“A: Her name is Sydney, not Cindy. B: I'm not her man. C: I wasn’t fooling around with anyone.”

“You tell yourself that, Bear. You tell yourself that…”

What had really transpired at the wedding reception, under Donna’s implacable scrutiny, was that Carmy was apologizing to Claire, or to be more precise, trying to. It was like pulling teeth.

Syd, across the room, at the Berzatto’s table, was sharing a slice of cake with Donna because the three-layered wedding cake with fresh berries, elegantly and lavishly decorated with strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, cherries, and blackberries was too much for her to handle after having had every other dish in the menu. Sydney served that cake with a warm jealousy sauce and sprinkled some pride on top too, to try and hide it. But Donna picked up on it nonetheless. She also noticed that apparently the Dr. was trying to get Carmy back and was not being subtle about it.

Syd saw that too and drowned her apprehension in Rosé champagne. Copious amounts of it.

Claire’s attempts to make Carmy cave were unsuccessful not only because he just didn’t want to go back to whatever they had, but also because he wanted something someone else.

Carmy’s eyes kept wandering to Syd. He only had eyes for her.

That attitude, which could be seen from outer space, hit Claire’s competitive nerv. She was competing with Syd for Carmy's attention and with herself for a second chance of forcing the outcome, with the same man that had started out by giving her a wrong phone number and then didn’t even bother answering her calls, letting them go straight to voicemail. She was determined to get it right this time around, all she needed was to get him with his guard down, she knew.

Claire tried to kiss him and Carmy was adamant about not being interested. Borderline rude, considering all eyes were on them, even the bride’s. He turned his face away as fast as he could, backed out, and pretty much ran away leaving her exposed in front of the crowd. He wanted nothing to do with it and everything to do with who he saw across the room.

Syd was stuffing her mouth with cherries, one after the other, nervously layering them with booze.

The bubbles of her glass made her want more of both, the champagne and the fruits.

Carmy was on his way to talk to Syd, because her eyes were fixated on him. He knew she had seen it all. He assumed she may have misinterpreted it. He wanted to explain himself to the only woman that mattered. Donna intercepted him and called him out on everything, whispering in his ear what felt like accusations but were just unsophisticated ways to show her son she knew him well and that she was dialed in on what he felt for Sydney. And what was more important, it didn’t escape her notice that the object of his affection felt the same way for him.

Donna also had an ulterior motive, though. She hated how desperate Claire seemed to get in her son’s pants. Too desperate for her like.

Sober Donna was more dangerous than inebriated Donna because now she was more aware of everything and everyone. Her falcon eyes didn’t miss a thing and turned out she was an incredibly reliable judge of character when she didn’t take advice from Cabernet Sauvinogn.

Carmy didn’t know what to make of that. He felt his cover had been blown and part of him feared his mother telling on him, but this other part of him, the one he was going to listen to now, kept telling him his secret was safe with her and that the lady with the cherry in her mouth, that kept downing glasses of champagne as if it was sparkling water, was going to be needing a ride home soon.

He wanted to be her knight in shining armor, just that one time, to return the favor for all those times in which she saved him.

Carmy, now a gent since he almost lost her to The Poacher Shapiro, behaved like a Golden Retriever and couldn’t possibly leave such a beautiful damsel in distress like that so he drove her home after the party and also after mentioning multiple times how beautiful she looked in that dress, that happened to be printed in his brain forever from that day on.

So, when they got to her place, he helped her get in because doors were like this indecipherable concept for Syd in her condition, especially the putting the key in the lock part.

And once they crossed her threshold, the rest was history.

The raspberries took over and proved Donna right. 🤌💋

A/N: dividers by @animatedglittergraphics-n-more

Sydcarmy Wish 💫🤌💋

(not a fic per se although it looks like it, but it’s literally what I really wish happens after the wedding) #Manifesting

Raspberries

Context: Post-Tiff’s wedding.

Syd drinks too much and since she doesn’t drink often, can’t hold her liquor and so she’s in for a major hangover.

Carmy is now a gent since he almost lost her to The Poacher Shapiro, so he’s behaving like a Golden Retriever and cannot possibly leave such a beautiful damsel in distress like that so he drives her home after the party and also after mentioning multiple times how beautiful she looks in that dress, that is now printed in his brain forever, by the way.

So, they get to her place and he helps her get in because doors are like this indecipherable concept for Syd in her condition, especially the putting the key in the lock part.

And at some point he has to carry her because she falls asleep as soon as they cross her threshold. So they make it to her sofa, she lays there completely knocked out and Carmy who doesn’t wanna leave her alone in case she gets sick and needs someone to hold her hair or something, sits down on the floor, next to her feet, like an obedient dog, leaning his back against the couch and eventually falling asleep too.

Cut to Syd throwing up in the bucket he carefully placed next to her, anticipating the obvious next phase of her hangover. He wakes up to this view of Syd barfing and whimpering and feels for her, holds her braids in place and patiently waits till the vomits subside.

Then helps her up and takes her to the bathroom where she brushes her teeth and repeatedly rinses her mouth with raspberry flavored mouthwash for kids, she has never stopped using since PreK, which Carmy finds adorable.

She catches him smiling and trying to hide it.

Then Carmy helps her to get back to the couch and offers her some tea or his anti-hangover home remedy, which makes her feel nauseous again so he offers her a Tylenol instead and she accepts the pill and from her spot in the couch gives him directions to find the bottle in her nightstand.

Once she pops the pill and drinks a whole glass of water, he places an ice bag in her head and sits down next to her. She then cuddles next to him as if the temperature woulda dropped 10 degrees. He doesn’t know what to do but lets her do as she pleases.

She thanks him. He says “anytime”. She promises him this will not happen again. There’s this tension because they are too close. Too close.

Her head on his shoulder, his hand holding the ice bag in place on top of her head, her cuddle, too close.

She then tells him that she doesn’t need the ice anymore because the Tylenol seems to be kicking in and he obeys. Next thing he knows is that her hand is on his cheek, making him turn to see her, she’s looking at him, zeroing him and he’s nervous and scared and mesmerized by her eyes, entranced.

Carmy kisses her, ever so slightly, almost a butterfly kiss. She smiles against his lips. Now both her hands are cradling his face and he is mirroring her smile too.

Then she’s sick again and runs to the bathroom.

He’s right behind her and watches the whole raspberry mouthwash ritual again, with renewed amusement.

When they come back to the couch, his new favest place on Earth, they sit and she then lays down with her head on his lap. She rolls on her side and cuddles his lap. She loves how comfortable it feels. Carmy gently plays with Syd’s braids, her humming tells him she seems to enjoy this, and after a while when she turns to look at him and innocently ask him why he stopped his ministrations in her hair, he dives in for another kiss. Because of the awkward position they are in, the kiss is also soft and tender, mostly accessory to what his playful hands are doing in her hair.

When Syd feels better she sits up properly next to him, casually leans her side against her sofa and rests her head on her hand, looking at him, like studying his features.

“Is everything OK?”

“Yep, just wondering why haven’t you really really kissed me yet. I mean… clearly you want to. Right? Is it the vomit? Do I reek vomit? I think my breath is OK, it’s raspberry. Don’t you like raspberr-“

She couldn’t finish that sentence because Carmy’s tongue got in the way of hers and tangled up in her mouth, his hands grabbed her face as he French kissed the fuck outta her. Several times.

Syd is breathless.

When Carmy breaks the kiss to let her catch her breath he makes sure she understands how much he loves raspberries.

“I love raspberries, Syd, especially when they taste like you.”

🤌💋

[3wisellamas]

Deltarune Halloween Prompts Day 30: Treats

---

Sure, Halloween was for treats, but this year K_K wanted to do something extra-special. It'd been a lot of work, visiting everyone in town, learning their preferences, and putting together so many wildly different combinations of ingredients and flavors, but the months' worth of effort had finally paid off!

Stepping back, they admired their cupcake creations. For Seam, their favorite shopkeeper, purple-iced dark chocolate sprinkled with shards of sugar, and dusted with powdered cinnamon. The cinnamon had gone to great use in Malius' as well, with cinnamon glaze over red cake and a cinnamon cream center.

For Swatch, a two-tone vanilla and chocolate cupcake, with even the icing split down the middle, and for Clover a three-way split with bonus raspberry flavor, a culinary achievement K_K was especially proud of!

Queen's preferences were...peculiar, something every citizen of Cyber World knew well, and so for her he'd gotten a little creative, with green-dyed yellow cake and spicy corn chip crumbles mixed into the icing. Lancer also proved to have similar tastes to his "girldad," and so K_K instead made him a blueberry muffin with a pit of salsa hidden inside, as well as a second for himself to see if that combination was actually as horrible as it sounded. Thankfully his father proved to be a little more reasonable, and for him K_K prepared just a plain white cake made with almond flour, with cashew bits sprinkled over the icing.

For Prince Ralsei, a vanilla-iced chocolate cupcake, fitting his strangely upside-down nature, with extra sprinkles. And K_K hadn't forgotten the Lightners either, with a cherry-filled cupcake for Susie that even had blood-red icing, and chocolate-iced chocolate cake with chocolate cream in the middle, chocolate sprinkles on top, and dusted with chocolate cookie bits for Kris. Shockingly, Rouxls seemed to like chocolate almost as much as the human, which K_K got to have a little fun with, making the icing resemble dirt for a few sour gummy worms to reside in.

Finally, there were a couple more that Kris requested for friends of theirs that K_K had never met, but they could get a sense from how they spoke about them: one devil's food with more sprinkles than they'd ever used on a single cupcake before, the other a simple lemon cake with a couple of coins stuck into the icing, for some reason.

But the most special of all were the two K_K made for Sweet and Cap'n. Sweet got a warm vanilla cake with pumpkin spice icing and a little caramel drizzled on top, while Cap'n's was chocolate and strawberry icing, with a little of the fruit baked inside and one slice they'd saved to adorn the very top. Those two stood out among all the rest that K_K had prepared for Castle Town as masterpieces, ones that they couldn't wait to show off!

"You READ MY FUCKING POETRY??!" Oh, there they were already! Smiling, K_K turned to see Sweet running into the kitchen, ready to show them their cupcake at last, but they seemed to be in quite a hurry for some reason.

To K_K's horror, in his rush Sweet suddenly tripped over his own feet, going flying face-first right into the counter...and into the two cupcakes K_K had made for him and Cap'n.

"SWEET COME BACK HERE--Oh. Oh no." Cap'n stopped in his tracks, taking in the scene, with Sweet wiping off the caramel and icing and strawberries from his speaker, dazed, and K_K standing there, silent, tears in their eyes. "Hey, uh...those weren't nothin' important, right? It looks like you got plenty of others!"

K_K just ran from the room, wailing, and Cap'n's soul sunk.

[chirasul]

anonymously send me a fruit!

🍏 Green Apple: I am going to find you in real life and kill you 🍎 Red Apple: What’s the biggest rock you can swallow whole? 🍌 Banana: God forgot you - but the devil didn’t 🍒 Cherries: When you step outside, you make birds forget their song 🥥 Coconut: You shit and piss incorrectly, and you’ll never find out how 🍆 Eggplant: Who are you? Why are you here? What do you want? 🍇 Grapes: If you were burning to death, I wouldn’t waste my spit on you 🥝 Kiwi Fruit: You’re a wizard, and I must eat you to absorb your powers 🍋 Lemon: Ever been buried alive? No? That’s kind of surprising 🍈 Melon: When your parents are asked about you they change the subject fast 🍑 Peach: I had a dream that you turned into a bear, but you were way, way bigger than normal bears. Your eyes glowed red and smoke poured from your mouth, a clockwork bear, steaming, fueled by machinations unknown. You patrolled the forest looking for food, but your hunger was never sated. Mankind fell victim to their own follies, and their world wasted away, leaving only the natural wonders flourishing once again. But none of it was for you. You were a mistake. An abomination. Made from both the natural world and the machine world, yet belonging to neither, and abandoned by both. You will always grow hungrier, and you will never die. 🍐 Pear: I think they should invent a new kind of clown based on you 🍍 Pineapple: You have infinite legs with infinite knees, I am so so scared 🍓 Strawberry: I think you should never touch any electrical device again 🍊 Tangerine: Clouds like to point at you and say “that one looks like a nimbus” 🍉 Watermelon: Time is a gift horse and you keep looking it in the mouth

[i-write-fanfics-to-procrastinate]

Dante/Claire, 19?

K, you literally made my day with this request. People wanna read about my little OC? I’m- D’: Claire’s debut to the public yay! I’m still trying to figure out her character a little, so maybe this is a little ramble...y. But! I hope you like it anyways. Thank you so much for requesting her D’: <3 

Dante x OC (Claire) 19: A Kiss for Luck

Claire plucked another strawberry from the bowl between them taking a bite of the sweet fruit, leaning back in her seat. It was a warm day, warmer than usual for spring. And she was giddy with excitement for what the rest of the week might bring. Flowers in bloom? Spring rain showers in the morning only for sunshine in the afternoon. And… good company? 

Her eyes flitted over to where Dante sat, one leg crossed over his knee, fingers tapping a rhythm into the park bench. The warm sun touched his cheek. In this light, his eyes looked almost sky blue. She felt a flush rise in her cheeks, and she focused her attention back on the strawberry in her hand. 

Dante, the famous devil hunter… He had saved her life once, and somehow that had led to this… friendship? She couldn’t stop herself from smiling. No. I hope… that it’s more than just a friendship. Then again… how could it be? She hesitated, the smile dropping away, glancing over at him once more. 

Dante… Dante was handsome and charming… he loved to tease. She could always tell by the glint in his eyes, the smirk on his lips. How could someone like him, a guy who could have anyone he wanted, fall for someone like her? Plain, boring Claire, the daughter of an antique shop owner, with her sandy blonde hair (she wished she had been granted her mother’s auburn), and her dark brown eyes. 

“You’re thinking too hard,” Dante said, suddenly breaking the silence. Claire jumped, glancing over at him, strawberry still in one hand. 

“What do you mean?” She asked. The devil hunter smiled, putting his hands behind his head and leaning back in his seat on the park bench. 

“You’re anxious. Whenever you think too hard you bite your lip and twirl your hair around your thumb.” He… knows that? She felt her cheeks go hot again, and she glanced down at her lap. 

“It’s nothing,” she murmured, still twirling the ends of her hair around her thumb. Dante frowned, and she knew he didn’t believe her. He reached out, resting his hand on hers, thumb brushing across her knuckles. She had been expecting teasing or a change of subject. This was something he’d never done before. She glanced up to meet his eyes, searching for whatever had enticed him to take her hand. 

“You can talk to me about ‘nothing’ whenever you’d like,” he said. There were butterflies in her middle as he let out a huff and stood quickly, “Well. I should head back to the shop.” He ran his fingers through his hair, and Claire rose to her feet.

“Thanks, for sharing the strawberries with me,” she whispered, offering him a smile. Dante blinked, his cheeks tinting pink. 

“Heh, yeah. Next time I’ll take you out for Sundaes.” 

Take me out? Like a date? He couldn’t mean it like that…. “I’d like that,” she said. 

“Vergil’s probably waiting for me at the shop,” Dante groaned. “With another lecture.” That teasing glint lit up his eyes, and he leaned over pointing at his cheek, “So maybe I need a kiss for luck, babe?” 

Again with the teasing. He had said silly things like that before, and it had always garnered a blush from her before he quickly turned around with “Just kidding.” But this time, seeing his smirk, the way he pressed the tip of his finger into his cheek—smoosh, the teasing light in his eyes… a burst of courage filled her. She was done with Dante’s teasing. She had wanted to kiss him from the moment she first met him and they had first shared strawberry ice cream in the park. 

So, in that moment—before he could take back his request—she leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss to the corner of his mouth. Dante froze, his cheeks flushing as red as his coat. And then he let out a soft laugh, “Damn, I was not expecting that.” 

Claire crossed her arms, “You asked for it!” She huffed. “You ask for it a lot.”

“Yeah, well, you never took advantage of it until now.” He shrugged a little. 

Claire flushed, “I’m sorry, maybe I shouldn’t have—” He cupped her face in his hands, brushing his thumbs over her cheeks. 

“Ms. Laurent,” he murmured, “Are you saying you regret kissing me?” 

Her heart was pounding against her ribs. She reached out to grasp his leather coat with one hand. “No… not for a second.” 

Dante grinned, looking down into her eyes a moment more before he said, “Good, ‘cuz neither do I.” He tilted his head and kissed her softly on the lips. Her breath caught in her throat as she pulled him closer, reaching up to cup his cheek. He smiled as he took a step back, drawing away from her touch. “You taste like strawberries.” He whispered. 

“So do you,” Claire grinned. He leaned in to kiss her again, gently brushing his thumb along her jaw to lift her chin. 

“I’ve wanted to do that…” He trailed off, and shook his head, laughing a little. His dumb smile was contagious, but she knew... he had to go.

“Isn’t Vergil waiting for you?” 

“Dammit,” He pulled away, straightening his coat. “I’ll call you.” 

“Don’t be too long,” Claire teased. Dante turned to leave but then spun back around and pulled her into one last kiss. He was gone before she could say goodbye, her knees weak, butterflies fluttering in her middle. Dante kissed me. She smiled, glancing up at the passing clouds as she hurried back to the antique shop. Me?! Plain and boring Claire? He… kissed… me?! She had never felt so much happiness, warmth spreading through her like cherry blossoms blooming in Spring. The start of something new and beautiful.

[worddoodles]

01

DUODECIM. SIGHT. 29% Merlot, 24% Petite Sirah, 21.5% Cabernet Sauvignon, 15% Malbec, 3.5% Tempranillo, 3.5% Barbera, 2.5% Cabernet Franc, and 1% Port. NOSE. Black cherry, plum, black berry, strawberry vanilla, and clove. PALATE. Aromas lead to a full-bodied palate with well-rounded and full tannins. The long finish has a nice mix of dark red fruit and spice. PAIRING. The wine pairs well with our Cooper’s Hawk Filet Mignon or Red Wine Braised Short Ribs. Breville BES870XL Barista Express Espresso Machine, Large, Stainless Steel. The barista express from bean to espresso in under a minute create great tasting espresso in less than a minute. The barista express allows you to grind the beans right before extraction, and its interchangeable filters and a choice of automatic or manual operation ensure authentic cafe style results in no time at all. Player’s Handbook. Disclaimer: Wizards of the Coast is not responsible for the consequences of splitting up the party, sticking appendages in the mouth of a leering green devil face, accepting a dinner invitation from bugbears, storming the feast hall of a hill giant steading, angering a dragon of any variety, or saying yes when the DM asks, “Are you really sure?” Once upon a time, long, long ago, in a realm called the Midwestern United States - specifically the states of Minnesota and Wisconsin - a group of friends gathered together to forever alter the history of gaming. The Dungeons & Dragons roleplaying game is about storytelling in worlds of swords and sorcery. It shares elements with childhood games, D&D is driven by imagination. It’s about picturing the towering castle beneath the stormy night sky and imagining how a fantasy adventurer might react to the challenges that scene presents. Bat. Tiny beast, unaligned. Armor Class 12. Hit Points 1 (1d4 - 1). Speed 5 ft., fly 30ft. STR 2(-4). DEX 15(+2). CON 8(-1). INT 2(-4). WIS 12(+1). CHA 4(-3). Senses blindsight 60 ft., passive Perception 11. Languages -. Challenge 0 (10XP). Echolocation. While it can’t hear, the bat has no blindsight. Keen Hearing. The bat has advantage on Wisdom (Perception) checks that rely on hearing. ACTIONS. Bite. Melee Weapon Attack: +0 to hit, reach 5 ft., one creature. Hit: 1 piercing damage. President-elect Joe Biden clears 270-vote threshold in Electoral College count, formalizing his victory. Jeff Bridges. @TheJeffBridges. As the Dude would say..New S**T has come to light. I have been diagnosed with Lymphoma. Although it is a serious disease, I feel fortunate that I have a great team of doctors and the prognosis is good. I’m starting treatment and will keep you posted on my recovery. 7:00 PM. 10/19/20. Jeff Bridges. @TheJeffBridges. Here’s the latest: Feeling good. Shaved my head. Got a puppy - Monty. Had a birthday - 71, man. For more updates, visit jeffbridges.com/latest. 12:59 PM. 12/14/20. The 50 best games of 2020. From big to small, we rank them all. By Polygon Staff. 50. BUGSNAX. 49. NO MAN’S SKY. 48. HELLTAKER. 47. DOOM ETERNAL. 46. SUPER MEGA BASEBALL 3. 45. MARIO KART LIVE: HOME CIRCUIT. 44. CREAKS. 43. CALL OF DUTY: WARZONE. 42. YAKUZA: LIKE A DRAGON. 41. IN OTHER WATERS. 40. WIDE OCEAN, BIG JACKET. 39. LEAGUE OF LEGENDS. 38. ARKNIGHTS. 37. DESPERADOS 3. 36. PARADISE KILLER. 35. DIRT 5. 34. TONY HAWK’S PRO SKATER 1 AND 2. 33. PAPER MARIO: THE ORIGAMI KING. 32. THE SOLITAIRE CONSPIRACY. 31. GHOST OF TSUSHIMA. 30. ORI AND THE WILL OF THE WISPS. 29. MURDER BY NUMBERS. 28. DESTINY 2: BEYOND LIGHT. 27. HYRULE WARRIORS: AGE OF CALAMITY. 26. STREETS OF RAGE 4. 25. HARDSPACE: SHIPBREAKER.

[punkpal]

burgundy, pomegranate, cherry, wine, persian red, blood, cardinal, maroon, merlot & crimson ❣️

Burgundy: How often do you make your bed? what do your favourite bedsheets look like? I make my bed for one of two reasons. 1. I have finally decided to wash my bed sheets for the first time in 6 months and i have decided to change my ways and start making my bed daily to improve my mood and make me less tempted to nap during the day (this lasts for two days max). Or 2. I have a apartment inspection that i need to clean my house for so as to not let my landlord know i live like a pig. As for what my bed sheets look like, they are a light pink colour made from fake velvet because i am both a classy bitch (who likes soft materials) and a broke bitch (who can’t afford them.)

Pomegranate: Favourite and least favourite fruits? My favourite fruits are cantaloupe, strawberries, watermelon, mango and passion fruit. And my least favourite is the banana for a multitude of reasons namely the taste, smell, texture, shape 🤢🤮and the stringy bits. Also fun fact bananas aren’t actually a fruit but a herb. But i am still listing them as my least favourite fruit because i hate them and i wanted to take this opportunity as an excuse to call them out for being the devils dick of the food world.

Wine: Tell us about your first experience with alcohol. So i would have been about 14, so circa 2011. And i am hormonal, depressed, lonely but mostly just really fucking bored so i help myself to Dads alcohol fridge because why the fuck not. Drink a full cup of straight vodka (because i am dumb, inexperiences and no one can stop me) and then laugh to myself for a while as that shit hits me like a train. Then it wore off and i go back to my normal routine of crying myself to sleep, taking note that i should probably drink it later next time if i wanted to use it to hopefully skip the late night breakdown. And maybe mix it with some juice or something if i didn’t want it to taste like pure fire next time around.

Persian red: Answer with a picture of your dream holiday destination.

Yes i am not joking either. My dream holiday is to India because my best friend lives over there and to name a few other things i love about India and why i want to go is i love the culture, history and man they know whats up when it comes to food (i even had planned and booked a trip there for late 2018 but had to have it canceled because i had my brain surgery re-scheduled for during the time i was supposed to go. I plan to rebook it some day. Just obviously not anytime soon, coronavirus and all.) 

And my other dream holiday destination is a tour of Russia and Ukraine. Including a visit to the exclusion zone and Pripyat. (The chernobyl disaster is one of my autism special interests, i just find that shit really interesting okay, don’t @ me.) Also the architecture and history of Russia is really appealing to me. I’d also like to go to Mexico, Italy and all of Africa one day too.

Blood: Which of your family members is your favourite? My lil bro and my cat!!

Cardinal: What is the first song that made you cry? The earliest memory i have of crying to a song was probably me at age 13 crying to Safe And Sound by Taylor Swift. And next was probably Of Mice & Mens ‘Second & Sebring’ and/or ‘Purified’ during my early scene kid/baby metal kid phase.

Merlot: do you have any unusual fears? Other then things i fear because of my ocd and its related intrusive thoughts and associated suspicions i don’t think i really have any fears that are are all too unusual. I am scared shitless of clowns but not to the point i can’t watch a good Clown horror flic, in fact the IT movies are some of my favourite so much so i have a IT themed tattoo. I guess my fear of scappy doo counts as a unusual fear, but we don’t talk about that, lol.

Crimson: If you could have only one photo or poster on your wall, what would it be? Not to get sad and sappy but it would probably a photo of my late dog and best friend Barney. Not that i would ever forget him now that he is gone. But if i could only have one photo up i would like it to be of him as a reminder of what he means to me and all the good memories i have of him that i cherish. Heres a photo of him for reference and to enjoy. He is beautiful and the world deserves to know of him and how he will always be the goodest boy ever.

cherry, maroon have already been answered!! 

Thanks for these questions dear anon! I enjoyed answering them and it momentarily cured me of my debilitating boredom.

Give me the opportunity to go off... and send me a shade of red. I am passionate about stuff and bored shitless so it would be greatly appreciated! Thanks :)

[bloodfcst-a]

THE ULTIMATE GET-TO-KNOW GUIDE !

REPOST, don’t reblog.

favourite things:

season: summer. colour: dark blue, like navy. pie: key lime. fruit: passionfruit. ice cream flavour: french vanilla. also cookies & creme. breakfast food: crepes. alcoholic drink: sex on the beach. soda flavour: strawberry ramune. scent: freesia. flowers: lotus. animal: kitties. movie: mulan. tv show: ... i don’t have a particular one in mind, but i can say yufi would prefer chinese historical dramas like the king’s woman / tribes and empires / nirvana in fire compared to like....... korean dramas like boys over flowers, goblin, my love from another star. but action stuff like iris? she’d be into it. book: definitely enjoyed the empowerment of the sailor moon manga. superhero: what do you mean catwoman & talia al ghul don’t count? then she’d pick raven. fairy tale:  anything regarding guanyin. genre of music: soft pop...  genre of movies: action. genre of books: poetry.

pick one:

hot or cold juice or soda tv or movie movie or book late night talk shows or reality tv twitter or instagram trees or flowers philosophy or psychology ocean or lake water park or amusement park cats or dogs fresh water or sparkling water sugar or honey cookies or candy bath or shower morning or night running or walking piercings or tattoos frozen yogurt or ice cream vanilla or chocolate caramel or butterscotch art or music t-shirt or button down text or call ghosts or aliens

have they ever:

ridden a motorcycle: yes! she owns one, but her dad doesn’t really care for that... it’s her preferred method of transport. she also has muscle cars & jeeps for offroading. stolen something: most definitely. eaten an entire pizza by themselves: only the small personal ones that are like 7″ or smaller. made a prank call: she’ll dial it, come up with the idea, but won’t execute. broken a bone: you’d be surprised? she is baby.... not yet. fallen asleep during a concert or movie: never a concert, but most definitely a film, if she’s exhausted but her friends want her to watch. walked out of a movie because it was so bad: no. she would just refuse to go. been on the phone with someone for longer than 2 hours: no. at that rate y’all should just do chores or hang out together. dined & dashed: never. she gives her team big tips. held a gun: bang bang bang pull my devil trigger. yes. ding dong ditched: never!! in her neighborhood? a bad choice. gone skinny dipping: definitely. cried during a movie: nah. smuggled food into a movie: not really smuggling if you show it off and it’s not challenged, right? lied to get a job: for her covert locations, yes. practiced lines in from of a mirror: nah. she’s confident about her words. her looks? sometimes she questions those.  tried to see how many marshmallows they can stuff in their mouth at once: probably vs tida & majima. been kicked out of somewhere: only bc majima tbh. been on a blind date: her dad thinks this is the ideal way to go. he’s a dumbass. ghosted someone: she warns folks she can and will disappear at anytime. if they hold on to her after that warning, it’s their loss. bragged about something they haven’t done: why would she lie when she’s actually had an incredible life? she could brag about the things she has done. said i love you without meaning it: no. gotten in a fight: most definitely. fallen asleep on a bus: no. doesn’t typically take them,  as she prefers walking, taking her motorbike, or... being chauffeured. thanks, pops.

miscellaneous:

how do they take their tea or coffee: adds nothing to her tea, unless she craves a tea latte ( which in that case, she prefers earl grey or lavender with a touch of honey ). her coffee is typically iced-- a sweet treat to share with james, especially when they have gossip to dish or a necessary vent session. what is their ideal date: one where the attention is one-on-one and there’s no reference to her work or her title. she wants to be seen as an individual, for her own particular positives and not the connections she has or what she can do for someone. what are some of their guilty pleasures: sweets, shiny things like jewels and crystals, excessively cute things. catch her in sanrio or with her gudetama. longest they’ve stayed up for: three days. no rest for the wicked. she also doesn’t like to stop until the job is done. biggest purchase: that she’s personally made? mm, she doesn’t often make purchases for herself, more for her friends or for private services. things are typically bought for her. occasionally she’ll rent out an entire venue for her and her friends, like an arcade or a dance club.  greatest talent: spice level > 9000.  strange habits: perhaps that she’s very interested in the aesthetics & harmony of even basic things. she’s also quite health conscious, despite indulging in sweets from time to time. not that she doesn’t snack, but you’d find her with edamame vs potato chips, for example, or sparkling water to soda.  first job: working as an assistant in a dojo. can they do a handstand: yes. she’s a very athletic and flexible and strong little thing. can they cook: yes. in fact, most of her friends would probably starve or survive only on junk food if she didn’t. it wasn’t considered a necessity to learn, given the dynamics of her household. but she studied under her personal chefs because she enjoys the artistry of it. do they believe in the paranormal: most definitely. she swings buddhist / animist. do they have allergies: outright stupidity. she had to get some immunity to handle tida & majima. she loves them but... unbelievable levels of dumb sometimes. do they believe in love in first sight: never. have any special talents: she’s one of those people who relish in like, twisting cherry stems with her tongue. wiggling her eyebrows. winking with both eyes. making her muscles pop. hyper flexibility. doing stupid amounts of flips. learning things fairly easily and quickly. the annoying kind of special talent.

tagged by: @sharkapologlst offered it to me as a gift & now i bless u tagging: @garrotejima @0xa00001 since i directly referenced y’all. anyone else interested, too. 

[simatomica]

Alll questions for you and emilio lol

I’ll just do Emilio because he’s waaay more interesting than me lol.

peach: do you have any piercings or tattoos? “Neither. You don’t put bumper stickers on a Ferrari.”

raspberry: favorite flower? “Roses are classic and nice.”

lemon: do you have any pets? what are their names? “Does a baby girl Pup count?”

mango: what is your trademark? “My brows I’d like to think.”

passion fruit: how would you describe your style? “Comfortable.”

pineapple: sexual orientation? “Straight”

strawberry: favorite desserts? “Candy ;) “

cherry: can you play any musical instruments or can you sing? “None and I’m so pissed off about it.”

grape: if you could take a vacation anywhere in the world, where would you go? “Australia probably, the beaches and the weather looks amazing.”

banana: favorite horror movies? “American Werewolf in London”

blackberry: is your life an action film, a comedy, a romantic comedy, or drama? “A little bit of everything.”

pomegranate: when do you feel the most confident? “During a full moon.”

cantaloupe: what are your parents’ names? “Sonia, my beautiful mother. Never knew my dad.”

guava: dark & dramatic makeup or natural makeup? “I’m more of a natural gal myself”

tangelo: if you could be any mythical creature, which would you be? “Too late”

plum: favorite clothing brands? “Machine wash ready.”

coconut: favorite perfume? “Candy’s natural scent.”

lychee: satin or lace? “A little bit of both”

blueberry: what do you want to dress up as for halloween? “I’m a walking Halloween costume already”

apple: what do you use more, tumblr or twitter? “50/50 at the moment”

kiwi: what’s something that fascinates you? “The rate of growth my daughter is doing”

watermelon: do you have a job? if so, what is your job title? “Jack of all trades, I do a little bit of everything.”

papaya: what song describes your aesthetic? “Shout at the Devil by Motley Crue”

cranberry: favorite time of the day; morning, afternoon, dusk, or night? “The part of the day that I’m asleep”

nectarine: would you consider yourself an emotional person? “I am but I don’t express it much”

orange: do you have long eyelashes? “No, Benny does though.”

apricot: what do you do when you’re sad? “I usually hit something.”

star fruit: favorite sea creature? “Loch Ness Monster”

dragonfruit: do you drink alcohol? “I do.”

[as-was-written]

All the ice cream flavors

@theresastargirl​

Under the cut because there’s a lot of them!

Almond Chocolate Coconut: a touch headcanon.This Doctor isn’t especially physically affectionate, but it’s because her touch telepathy is extremely strong in this body and she doesn’t know her limitations yet. But if you stroke her hair she will love you forever.

Bacon Ice Cream: a "what were you even thinking" headcanon.She eats bathbombs. She thinks they taste flowery and nice. (i am surprisingly passionate about this headcanon i’ll be honest)

Black Raspberry Cheesecake: a sexuality and/or romanticism headcanon (romantic orientation, sexual orientation, etc).This Doctor is asexual and panromantic. With a strong preference for women.

Cactus Fruit Sorbet: a "this shouldn't work but it does" headcanon.She reorganised the library according to the colour of the books. To be fair it looks really pretty.

Cherry Garcia: a role model/inspiration headcanon.Her fam. Her friends have always given the Doctor inspiration and Yaz, Ryan and Graham are no different from that.

Chubby Hubby: a body image/self esteem headcanon.It took a long time for the Doctor to get used to her new body’s appearance, longer than she’d want to admit. All the curves and body parts that were new threw her and even in the TARDIS there was a lot of experimentation with clothing to see what was most comfortable

Chunky Monkey: a names, addresses, nicknames, etc. headcanon.The reason she is so chill about Graham calling her Doc when her first body wasn’t is partly because it reminds her of those first human friends of hers. Also character development in general.

Cookies and Cream: a family headcanon.One of the Doctor’s greatest regret in life is leaving behind Susan the way she did. She still has the shoe with a hole in it belonging to her granddaughter and she misses her every day.

Cotton Candy Explosion: a childhood/child(ren) headcanon.For a while as a very young Time Tot, Brax was her hero. Until Koschei came along and she found a new person to follow after.

Death By Chocolate: an indulgence/guilty pleasure headcanon.The Doctor loves chocolate of all kind, but especially sweet ones. At night however she enjoys settling down with a bar of dark chocolate.

Devil's Food Chocolate: a vice headcanon.This is based on the audio drama The Master so spoilers for that, but the Doctor managed to remember killing that boy when she was a child. She still has nightmares about it and it’s the one thing she won’t ever talk about.

Dulce de Leche: a happy/sweet romantic or queerplatonic headcanon.The Doctor’s favourite way to relax with a partner is to curl up on their lap and have her hair stroked. It makes her feel safe and secure and loved.

Elderberry: a hurt/comfort headcanon.If she’s in a relationship with someone she enjoys being cared for when injured. Not that she will ever, ever admit it in a million years. But it’s nice to be fussed over. 

Entangled Mints: a friendship headcanon.For the Doctor her friends are her priority. She’s happy to just hang out with them and wants to show off the universe. She just wants them happy.

Espresso 'n Cream: a coffee/tea/coffee-shop (AU)/caffeine headcanon.The Doctor adores coffee. She will be that one person at Starbucks who gives the poor barista a really complicated order though.

Fudge Behaving Badly: a misbehaving/getting into trouble headcanon.Even now the Doctor is constantly getting in trouble. In the Academy her teachers despised her because she and the Deca were always causing mischief and it’s something she has never been able to grow out of. She takes pride in the fact she has the record for most detentions in Gallifrey’s history.

Ginger Crème Brûlée: a gender headcanon (gender identity, gender presentation, butch/femme, gender feels, etc).Although the Doctor now identifies as a woman and much more feminine than before in human terms she would still probably refer to herself as non binary. She experimented for a while and definitely prefers female pronouns though.

Half Baked: a bad idea/poor planning headcanon.Although the Doctor likes to act like she’s organised and knows what she’s doing, usually she doesn’t. She’s been winging it for the last three thousand years and most of the time it’s worked.

Heartbreak Healer: a sad/angsty romantic or queerplatonic headcanon.The Doctor still has room in her hearts for every person she’s loved. Including those all the way back in her first body like her wife and Cameca.

Jasmine Peach Tea: a self-care/self-love headcanon.When the Doctor just needs a quiet time to herself, which happens more often than you’d imagine, she enjoys to get herself a herbal drink and read a book in the library. Either that or sit in the entrance of the TARDIS, feet dangling, and watch the universe.

Kahlua Almond Fudge: a language/words headcanon.The Doctor feels most comfortable speaking Gallifreyan. If she is on Earth she tries the speak English out of courtesy and because the translations are easier if she’s in a different country, but otherwise she speaks her first language.

Kiwi Midori: a creative arts headcanon.Disappointed she can’t play guitar anymore, the Doctor spent some time figuring out what this body enjoyed doing artistically. She soon found drawing. They’re usually sketches and she’s best at people, specifically faces.

Lemon Angel Food: a virtue headcanon.The Doctor tries very hard to keep to her promise of being kind. She is sick of being the Time Lord Victorious. She wants to simplify things and start again as just a friendly traveller and helper.

Lemon-Lime Sorbet: a sexual/NC-17 headcanon (alt: a secret(s) h/c).My Doctor is asexual, but whilst I was figuring out her sexuality I decided she would be a sub and have a major praise kink

Magic Mint Cookie: a magic/supernatural headcanon (alt: a taste h/c).I don’t know what to do for magic?? So I’ll do taste instead. 100% inspired by real events from Jodie, she can’t handle spices as much as she wants to. That won’t stop her eating very spic food though.

Masque of the Raspberry Sorbet: a fear/horror headcanon (alt: a costume(s)/facade(s) headcanon).Since being ducked as a witch, she has a fear of being submerged under water and drowning. It’s something she’s trying to overcome in her swimming pool because she doesn’t want anyone else to find out.

Neapolitan: an intimacy/vulnerability (or lack thereof) headcanon.The Doctor only really lets herself be intimate with people she has a long history with. She is a lot more eager to hug family members and old friends.

Orange Pineapple Whip: a kinky headcanon (alt: an eccentricity h/c).The Doctor is almost the definition of eccentric. Many people would call her whole outfit alone eccentric. She doesn’t notice though, and she doesn’t care. She is happy with who she is and that’s what matters to her.

Oreo Cheesecake: a physical health/disability headcanon.She doesn’t have any physical disabilities. The closest I can think is that her touch telepathy is stronger than other incarnations because they are the main sense for Time Lords.

Peanut Butter Plum Cherry: a soulmate/soulmate AU headcanon (alt: an unconditional love headcanon)She tries very hard not to fall in love with humans. Jamie was the first long term human relationship she had and losing him crushed her. Since then she’s tried and failed to stop falling in love with humans.

Phish Food: a music headcanon.I was discussing this a few weeks ago so this is perfect. The thirteenth Doctor is really into cheesy pop like Katy Perry and Taylor Swift. She also likes K-pop and J-pop. She likes the beat and rhythm of the music. She also likes how happy it all sounds.

Purple Daze: a stoner/drugs headcanon.In the Academy she would have ginger with Koschei (for anyone who doesn’t know, ginger canonically gets Time Lords high). The less said about those times at the Academy the better.

Rainbow Cream: a nature headcanon.If given the choice, the Doctor would enjoy spending the day relaxing next to a shallow river. That’s the most relaxing natural environment she can think of. Also a secluded beach.

Road Trip: a travel or escapism headcanon.Travelling is the Doctor’s life, it’s the most important thing to her. She loves the freedom it brings, the ability to go where and when she wants. She can’t imagine a different life style for her.

Rocky Road: a difficulty or struggle headcanon.The main thing the Doctor struggles with is the new sexism she has to face. Even the more minor things like how patronising men are towards her, literally and metaphorically looking down on her. She despises it and it makes her so angry.

SNAFU (Strawberries Naturally All Fudged Up): a mistake(s) headcanon.The Doctor really doesn’t like making mistakes. More than anything else she finds it embarrassing. And that’s really annoying.

Strawberry Rhubarb Crunch: a mental health/neurodivergent headcanon.The Doctor has PTSD definitely. Not just from the Time War but the many horrific things she has seen through her long life. I also see her having a Time Lord version of ADHD, but I need to do more research on that before I nail anything down.

Tennessee Mud: an alcohol, drunkenness, intoxication headcanon.It takes a lot to get the Doctor drunk, but when she does she’s giggly and affectionate. She will probably end up on your lap laughing at nothing.

Tuxedo Strawberry: a well-dressed headcanon (any headcanon about clothes).The Doctor tried to wear a dress the first time she had to wear formal clothing, but she just couldn’t with how impractical it was. Instead she prefers dressing up in a smart tux.

Vanilla Fudge Ripple: a strength headcanon.She has incredible upper body strength. She doesn’t get the chance to demonstrate it much, but it’s something she’s always had. She is also very emotionally and telepathically strong.

White Raspberry Truffle: a weakness headcanon.Daleks are her main weakness. They break down any morals she has set out and will do whatever it takes to get rid of them all. But losing her friends? That destroys her.

Wildberry Chocolate Chunk: a social life headcanon.She spends all her time with her fam. She tries not to spend too much time with other people because she’s scared of losing more people.

[cielizzydefencesquad]

*big puppy eyes* nooo, it’s not obnoxious at all! :3 I absolutely love it. Pwetty pwease, share more if you want. I cry why is this the best AU I have ever read. ;-; I’m so happy thank u. Here’s an anime I recommend because I love this parental shit: Hinamatsuri. I laughed and I cried and it has the same kind of vibe. A father learning how to be a dad.

In which Single Mum Seb has to learn how to cook because RC is sick of eating takeout and misses the homemade meals Mama Rachel used to cook so he throws a tantrum until Sebastian gives in, takes the kids to Whole Foods with the intent of buying pasta and sauce but as soon as the kids enter the beautifully overpriced supermarket, chaos erupts.

Finny wants to buy apple blossom seeds even though Sebastian’s all “Finnian J. Phantomhive we did not come to Whole Foods to purchase gardening supplies so you put those $14 seeds down now because I am not shelling out double digits for crap you can find in the middle of the forest.”

To which Finny replies (with big ole eyes): “You said a bad word.”

Erstwhile RC is throwing everything he can get into the shopping cart because he’s a rational kid and doesn’t know when they’ll ever venture out into society again. (“Is Uncle Sebastian a hermit? Does he ever go out?” RC rolled his eyes. “No wonder he’s such a freak, he doesn’t know how to interact with people.”)

But the thing is, RC’s only like 9 so all the foods he’s throwing in are totally random and he’s not the least bit concerned with what’s in and out of season. Right now it’s July but RC’s chucking in spring apricots, cherries, lychee, fall apples and gooseberries, winter plums, autumn persimmons—just everything he finds aesthetically appealing really.

And when Sebastian and Finny walk back to the cart (with Finny holding not one packet of seeds but five because after Sebastian started swearing, the mothers started gasping and pretty soon Seb’s wallet was $70 lighter), Sebastian nearly has a conniption because what the fuck are those things??

To which RC is all “they’re called lychee, Uncle Sebastian.” With his face all smug and pretty while Sebastian is all “I am not feeding three kids under the age of twelve fruit that’s covered in prickly shell shit” but realizes he’s gotta censor himself so he tries to reason with RC but hello, RC’s a Phantomhive.

This is followed by a disgruntled Seb making the worst deal of his life. “Put the lychee back and I’ll let you get strawberries” (but he low-key forgets that RC doesn’t do anything by halves so they buy like 7 cartons of that damn red fruit before Sebastian’s ready to call it quits until he notices Younger Bro Phantomhive has all but vanished)

After three minutes of frantic sprinting about the store, Seb & co find OC with his face pressed against the cake display glass before he turns around, eyes hopeful and asking “pleeeease Uncle Sebastian? Can’t we get just one little cake?”

And Sebastian’s all “Absolutely not.” (Because now he’s using Parenting Book Code #1, never let your kids eat sweets before dinner.)

But OC’s got those luminous sapphire eyes and his lower lip starts to wobble and he’s all “I haven’t had chocolate cake since…since before then.” With a pained expression and his little hands pressed against his heart and even the freaking bakery lady is tearing up but Sebastian is all “I am not about to get conned three times” but at the same time, he can’t just let a 9 year old burst into tears at Whole Foods of all places.

So what does he do?

He actually…behaves like a parent.

Sebastian kneels down (with RC and Finny watching his every move) and going “How about this, instead of cake we can make chocolate fondue. Your brother bought quite a few strawberries and with fondue you don’t even have to use a plate and fork.”

But OC’s still upset and Sebastian is becoming more and more uncomfortable as everyone continues to stare at him like he’s the devil incarnate.

So he goes for broke.

“Do you remember that story Charlie and the Chocolate Factory?”

OC nods silently.

“And the chocolate river Mr. Wonka had in his factory? Making fondue would be quite similar to having a chocolate river at home. You can dip anything you’d like into it. Strawberries, cherries—and we can even make different kinds. I remember Vincent telling me you were fond of chocolate, isn’t that right?”

The wobble in OC’s lip is gone and his wide sapphire eyes begin to gleam with excitement as he peeks over Sebastian’s shoulder to see RC and Finny, both thoroughly entranced with Sebastian’s words.

“What do you say?” Sebastian prompts.

(Which is pretty much how Sebastian’s kitchen table gets ruined beyond repair from chocolate stains and his poor, unfortunate assistant finds himself rushing between LA and NYC picking up a new carpet and towels for his very irritated—if somewhat amused—boss.)

I want to see a sitcom of this omg 

Sebastian + 3 kids + supermarket shenanigans XD 

Once again, thank you so much for allowing me to ramble Anon! (＾▽＾)

- mod Nina