#hot sex real

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

real talk having the 2nd worst new years eve yet 🤢🤢🤢 (throat infection, twisted neck, banged-about-foot, ego AND the rest o' me all bruised like misjuggled peaches 🍑🍑🍑)

im bent outa shape and suspectin the universe owes me 8 buck if anyone wannsa chip in

[knifearo]

ultimately when it comes to shipping and fandom space treatment of aspec characters i just don't accept "aro/ace people can still date/have sex" as an answer from nonaspecs. like yeah. mhm. okay. now i think we both know that you're not saying that out of real interest in the diversity of aspec experiences. so you can turn in your seventeen-page essay on why and how you plan to examine this character's aspec identity within the context of a romantic or sexual relationship complete with evidence from canon and peer reviews from multiple aspec people within the next week or i'm putting you in the pit from the edgar allen poe story

[michelleotter22]

I may look innocent but I promise you l'm not😈

[justanaromantic]

man literally what even is romantic attraction . is it just you see someone and you're like I want to kiss and hold hands w them . is that all it is ???? I'm pretty sure it's not but like . genuinely what is it . because I have no idea man .

[xo-o-o-o-o-o-o]

⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆birthday suit | s.jy⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺

you ask your boyfriend what he wants for his birthday, and his answer is "you".

pairings: dom!reader x switch!jake

warnings: emotionally charged smut, oral (m receiving), subby jake, soft dom reader, inexperienced jake, jake has a praise kink (me? projecting on jake? nah...), slight humiliation. mix of fluff and smut <3. sizeable amount of plot. not proofread sorry!

word count: 1.1k

notes: ⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆happy birthday jake!⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺

MINORS DNI

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

it was your boyfriends 23rd birthday, and in order to make today extra special for him, you had planned a day for the two of you to just go out to a park, have a picnic, and play around with layla for a while before a dinner reservation you had booked later. the only thing you didn't have planned? his present.

you had asked him several times before what he had wanted, but he assured you he wanted nothing. you knew jake better than that though, he always loved to be pampered, but often struggled to voice what he wanted, but you didn't want to pressure him, so how you were here, with no idea of what he wanted. you had originally wanted to give him a special surprise at night, but even though you two had been going steady for a few months, the two of you hadn't made it much farther than making out, often with any thoughts of progressing further ending with jake running off to the bathroom to finish the job himself. it was okay though, you knew your boyfriend was inexperienced and it was just so endearing to you.

and so, texts were sent between you two until he finally cracked.

______________________________________________________________

jake

i don't want anything. i swear.

you

but i want to spoil u today

jake

fine

i want you

*the previous message has been deleted*

you

i saw that babe

jake

shit

______________________________________________________________

with that decided, you couldn't wait for tonight; and neither could jake.

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

dinner was delicious, the steak cooked to perfection, the wine light and fruity as it slid down out of the flute glass and into your throat. the cherry colored lip tint you had applied so carefully earlier remained on the glass. the conversation was nice and you were reminded with every laugh why you loved jake so much. you finished the meal with soft serve ice cream over slices of cherry pie, and when jake saw the ice cream around your mouth, he almost popped a boner right then and there. he had to fight his mind to not start thinking dirty thoughts. you saw him muttering to himself and chuckled.

"you're so cute jake.... you know that right?"

"i um..." jake blushed redder than the cherry pie "thank you."

you just smiled "of course." and then you saw the tent starting to form in his pants "awww... does my baby have a thing for praise?"

if it was possible for jake to go any redder, he would have spontaneously combusted. he got up to take care of his "little problem" in the bathroom, but you grabbed his hand.

"i'll get the check and i can help you out when we get home."

he sat there, red in the face, hoping the server who came over to bring their check didn't see the protruding peak in his nice dress pants.

the car ride back to your shared apartment was tense, and jake started to palm himself through his pants, thinking your wouldn't notice because you were too focused on the road, but you noticed. you let it go, mostly because you knew he wouldn't cum with you there, so he essentially edged himself for the 15 minute car ride back home. you got into the house, and immediately started kissing him, cherry lip tint mixed with the faint taste of alcohol still on his tongue. you broke the kiss and he already looked so fucked out- his eyes slightly cloudy with blown out irises and his lips reddened both from the kissing and from your lip tint. he looked down at his boner, and it looked so painful.

"baby, can i help you with this?" you asked while gently stroking his upper thighs

he just nodded vigorously "just... check in?"

you kissed him on the forehead and trailed down to his neck "of course love, and if you ever need to stop, tell me. okay? this is for your pleasure and i want to know you are okay with this."

"im ready for this... and i feel comfortable cause its you... i love you." he said quietly.

how could you not kiss him when he was so adorable?! knowing he wouldnt be able to take it standing up, you took him into your shared bedroom, that you had set up with red lights and hearts, if only he hadn't been so drunk on the taste of your lips, he could have appreciated how beautiful the room was. he sat down on the bed as you undid his pants and pulled them down, when he was in his boxers you looked up at him from where you were on your knees in between his thighs.

"are you sure you are okay with this love?" you asked again

"y-yes! please..." he stuttered out

you smiled and started palming him on top of his boxers. he whimpered out pleas for you to do more, and you slowly took off his boxers, to reveal his cock.

"such a pretty cock for a pretty boy." you said, giving the bulbous, pink tip a few kitten licks to test the waters.

every time your tongue hit the slit he let out a soft whimper. slowly, you experimented with taking the tip in your mouth and sucking lightly, still trying to test his boundaries. the sensations were so much for jake, and while it wasn't his first time, he wasn't super experienced, and all he could think was that he was never going to be able to go back to his hand after feeling your warm mouth. the strangled and gasping moan he let out as you started slowly bobbing your head up and down on his dick entailed him throwing back his head and unintentionally thrusting into your mouth, you were caught off guard, but moaned. the vibrations traveled through his cock and straight to his head. he instantly started snapping his hips up to meet the wet warmth of your mouth. it was rare that jake took the lead, but you sure enjoyed it when he did.

"im so so so sorry, darling!" he cried out between moans "im sorry if it hurts, its just so good!"

upon hearing this, you hollowed your cheeks and hummed on his cock, hoping to enhance the experience for him. given the choked groans you assumed you did a good job.

"ahh! i-im cumming...!" he tried to pull out of your mouth, but you grabbed his hips and held them where they were, nodding your consent for him to cum in your mouth.

"c-cumming-" the orgasm took over him as a warm, sticky substance filed your mouth.

"that was so good..." he looked tired as he leaned back on the bed, his eyes sparkly, pupils blown out, and hair messy from him running his fingers through it.

"do you have one more in you?" you asked

"n-no, please im tired." he responded

you started to lift your shirt off "are you sure you don't want to go again?" you said slightly condescendingly but with an air of sweetness

and just like that jake was awake, this was the best birthday present ever.

oh... and lets just say by the end of the night jake was no longer inexperienced.

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

[georgiabulldogsfan37]

I’ve been a fan of Val Kilmer since I watched Batman Forever as a kid when the movie first came out. At the time, I only wanted to watch Batman Forever because of Jim Carrey. When I was in my 20s, I watched the Doors movie and became a bigger fan of the Doors — so much of a fan I started buying the Doors t-shirts and listening to their music even more. But it was last summer when I watched Real Genius and I realized that I have a crush on Val Kilmer.

This newfound crush on Val Kilmer became a surprise to me because I had a crush on 1 celebrity that didn’t last very long then I had a bigger crush on another celebrity which wasn’t long either — and I’ve been watching Batman Forever and his other movies for years and never once had a crush on him. How the fuck did this happen??? Why the sudden crush on Val Kilmer??

Tbh I don’t like having crushes and I don’t like the word “love” but somehow I have a crush on Val Kilmer and I love him — and guess what?? He’s the longest celebrity crush that I’ve ever had a crush on. He really has my heart. I don’t like feeling this way about anyone including a celebrity.

[lesbianherald]

kind of curious why the majority of jayvik smut focuses on bottom! viktor only. like no one wants to clap the golden boy's cheeks or smth 😔 anyway can't wait for your new AU because I know you won't leave me hanging in this top! jayce world.

i usually disengage with top/bottom discourse completely because 9/10 times I find it deeply stupid but this was so fucking funny. also "bottom!viktor" I know what you are. Fandom Vet.

[yaralulu]

Ok genuine question do you think Tamlin could shape shift his private area into a female private area and let Lucien hit? Or do you think they just did it the regular way

i’m glad you’re trusting me with this very important, serious question. yes and yes and yes. if there was a way these two could fuck, they were fucking. i’d also like you to indulge the idea of tamlin shifting them both into females 😜

[preydefiler]

I'm pretty freely dominant with my moots and followers, I like being dominant and I like being mean. I'm a big, bad wolf and I will be violent and feral and happy about that. I love being dominant. I love holding my sub down and taking what I want. I love to hear the whimpers and whines and sighs of defeated prey.

I also like being a sub. I gatekeep my submission like it's a secret society. Strangers don't get my submission, you haven't earned it. I don't even submit like most do. I'm still feral, and violent, but for a trusted partner? they can collar me, muzzle me, put me on a leash, call me a puppy. I'll wag my tail. I'll pant and I'll even beg.

But the moment you loosen your grip, the moment you stop holding my dominance captive... I am released, and I am rabid. I'm drooling and barking and growling about how you're mine, mine, mine, and I will take back everything you kept from me tenfold. I'll choke you until you pass out, and I won't stop fucking you. I will bury my knot so deep inside you they'll call me fucking Excalibur.

I'm a wolf, and I am not easily tamed.

[manglam-marfach]

dyke!Chilaios has me understanding breeding kink all of a sudden

[g00pyjes]

i feel like sex is a made up thing. there is no way that shit is real. everyone is playing a joke on me and i don't like it

[jiminy-crickets]

He’s so completely devoid of swag, negative aura, completely sexless, no maidens, once called a sex line just to chat about the weather, he can’t move the car because he’s at practice in chycawgo, people who know him aren’t sure if he’s ever eaten a cookie, he rushes home after games to watch his old team play, he was actually black until he was 15, he carried back to back to back teams in scoring, and he is a Lululemon ambassador.

[georgiabulldogsfan37]

The word “love” is a hard word for me to say and admitting that I have a crush on someone including a celebrity is very hard for me to admit. “Love” is NOT my favorite word. It’s a very uncomfortable word for me to use/say. I don’t usually admit that I have a crush when I do. I don’t like to admit when I have a crush on someone. I really don’t like having crushes 😭. I’m not used to talking about my feelings on someone/anything.

The truth is that I have a huge crush on Val Kilmer and I obviously love him. I love Val Kilmer. I love him. I really do love him. I’ve had celebrity crushes before but it’s different with Val Kilmer. I never thought I could feel this way about anyone. It was very hard for me to admit that I love and have a crush on Val Kilmer but I finally admitted on tumblr and to myself. I really surprised myself.

I’m so sorry to everyone who follows my blog/follows my blog for reasons not regarding to Val Kilmer and sees/reads my posts and my “naughty” tags about Val Kilmer.

This is the only place that I can actually talk and express my opinion about Val Kilmer.

[clairedaring]

GOY ARACHAPORN as LINDA

Doctor Climax (2024) dir. Pokpong Pairach Khumwan

[ghostfrog81]

Mclennon is almost philosophical in the way that there's only enough evidence to speculate and we may never get a solid answer to whether they were lovers or not. But like the answer to the question "what happens after death?" if there is an afterlife, and I ever end up in the same place as John Lennon, I will be asking him what happened

[gobstoppr]

hey guys am i allowed to say on main that i dont like metadad . am i gonna get beaten up for saying this.

guys i think we all took the term found family too literally and now everythings flattened into a boring nuclear family. guys can we stop. hello . is anybody there