#hopefully i'll have the last one up tomorrow but idk

[advisorsage]

The universe loves me

[qu1cks1lversb1tch]

Killer | Vox x Reader

Warnings: mentions of murder, blood, dead bodies, established relationship (married), HUMAN VOX, NSFW (18+), p in v, slight breeding kink but otherwise vanilla for my first 'smutty' Vox writing, reader is heavily implied to be female, Valentino existing

Word Count: 1.0K

Summary: Your husband came home from work to find a rather interesting sight in his living room. . . Made him wanna do a thing or two. . . Idk 💀✨

A/N — I couldn't not use this gif — I love it. I don't mention him by name until the end because we don't know what his name was while he was alive. . . It could've been Vox in both, but I'm not taking chances, so I used sweet little names instead. . . He also has dark hair and blue eyes in my mind. HOPE Y'ALL LIKE THIS ONE 💕 (I drew/made the MDNI banner myself — tell me you're proud of me. . . I'm gonna pretend I didn't write this when I wake up tomorrow 😭, but hopefully someone does like it)

Blood dripped from the hand of the body that was carelessly draped across the coffee table, the metallic smelling crimson staining the white rug below.

You stood firmly, hands on your hips as you stared at your husband, who, in turn, stared at the body as if it would suddenly disappear if he looked away.

"You killed her." He stated rather plainly, a glint in his eyes as he turned to look at you in all of your glory — bloodied hands, stained apron tied around your waist, hair tousled, and ripped pantyhose. . . It was odd for him to see you so unkempt. Had he not been your childhood friend turned lover and husband, you might have had something snarky to say in response to his obvious comment.

You hummed, assessing the expanding puddle on the new rug that nearly costed a fortune. "Yes, it seems I have."

"Did she deserve it?"

"They always do." You replied nonchalantly, removing your hands from your hips as you walked towards your husband — silently thanking whatever higher power that the blood on your hands had dried. You pulled him down by his tie and gave him a quick peck on the lips. "Welcome home, my love. . . Dinner will be done shortly. It's your favorite."

"I'll handle the mess while you finish up." Came his response.

You smiled as a thank you before going off into the kitchen to wash up the last couple dishes and stir the pot of stew that had been cooking low and slow all afternoon.

Your beloved husband entered the kitchen a bit later, hands coated in dirt and blood with the sleeves of his white dress shirt rolled up to his elbows.

He stood there for a moment watching you as if you were an animal of prey and he was an apex predator. Your breath hitched when that glint of something familiar returned to his electric blue gaze.

Within a moment, his hands drenched in sticky blood found your face, gently caressing it and leaving trails of the viscoelastic fluid behind as he brought you into a rough yet passionate kiss.

His hands trailed down your clothed body until they reached your thighs. . . With his fingers grasping the plush flesh, he hoisted you onto the counter top.

"Are you certain you want to do this before dinner, Honey?" You asked breathlessly just as his hands fell to his belt buckle, hastily undoing it with the metallic clicks of the silver colored mechanism, the leather falling from the silvery confines.

"No time like the present, Doll." He replied, practically ripping the button from the hole of his perfectly tailored suit pants.

"Carry on, Darling." You hummed.

He bunched up the skirt of your dress before reaching just below and ripping a large hole in the already destroyed pantyhose, all to gain access to the already soaked cotton fabric beneath.

The singular piece of fabric that separated your pussy from the warmed air of the kitchen.

"All mine. . ." He muttered in awe, rubbing the pad of his thumb up and down the large spot of arousal that had formed since he arrived home. You couldn't help it. Your husband was a fine specimen.

You whined at the need for something more; your darling husband only smirked before completely ripping the beloved pair of panties away, tossing them to the floor — he always said he'd get you more, and he always did. His thumb returned, slipping through your glistening folds before gravitating towards the sensitive bundle of nerves.

"Need you, Honey, please. . ." Your sweet voice cut through the silence with a whimper at the end — that was all it took for your husband's restraint to fly out the window.

He freed his bulging cock from the confines of his pants and boxers, immediately lining it up with the entrance. With your silent nod of approval, he slowly slid it into your sopping wet pussy.

He grunted as he bottomed out, paired almost perfectly with your moan as you adjusted to his sheer length and girth — it didn't matter how many times the two of you fucked, it was always like the first time.

After a moment he began thrusting and your sweet noises filled the room along with the sound of skin on skin. One of his hands held on to your waist so you wouldn't slip, and the other held on tightly to the counter.

"Taking me so well just like you always do, Doll." He grunted in your ear, his pace picking up as you moaned his name like a prayer on the lips of an angel, your fingers laced in his soft, dark hair.

It wasn't very long before the coil within began to build with pressure until it finally snapped, bringing you to a much needed orgasm that caused you to release your hold on his hair and clench around him, unintentionally milking your husband's cock. He came, painting your insides white, yet his thrusts didn't cease until he felt the very last drop enter you.

He then pulled out slowly, using his thumb to push his seed back inside of you as it tried to escape. "Gonna be a good mother one day, Doll."

"I'll try to be," you replied breathlessly before plastering a smile on your face, as if you didn't get railed in the kitchen by your husband, where your neighbor could've seen. "Dinner?"

"That sounds good, Doll. . . Let's get you cleaned up."

Sixty or so years later. . .

"Remember that time we fucked in the kitchen with a dead body two rooms over because the ground was frozen, so we couldn't dispose of it properly?" You questioned casually at dinner.

Vox looked up from his plate, a smirk falling onto his face. "Which time?"

"Well, this just got interesting." Valentino muttered into his drink, looking between you and Vox.

"When I killed Dorothy, of course."

"Can you not talk about your serial killer sex shit at the table!? I'd like to eat without the imagery." Velvette groaned, sliding her plate back slightly.

"Would you rather listen to Val talk about all the positions he's had his new favorite toy in?" Vox questioned.

"Hey!" Valentino whined.

[moodywyrm]

HI I'M NEW IDK HOW TO USE THIS BUT I HAVE SUM TO SAY ABOUT ABBY-

imagine she asks you for a massage after gym and you're all excited n stuff and u sit on her ass bcs she's laying on her stomach while u take care of her back and massage it gently and she can feel the heat from u like as u sit and djejskdjd😩

we're modifying this a little bit because I have farmer! abby on the brain. so instead of the gym, she asks you for a massage after a long day on the farm. just some notes: reader is described as wearing lipstick, owning self care items like body oil, has a vanity, and referred to with traditionally fem words like wife, girl, etc. but, genitalia for the reader is not mentioned. more farm abby for my wife @pinknightsinmymind

Planting seasons starts soon, which means Abby has been plowing the field all day and she's fucking exhausted. Every inch of her body is sore, and she's all but soaked through her wife pleaser, her flannel long forgotten on the porch railing. She's bone tired and, to make things worse, she hasn't seen you in two whole hours.

You've been inside making dinner, cooking up her favorite stew so she had a nice hot meal ready once she was done plowing. It's incredibly sweet, really, and she couldn't ask for a better wife, but she feels like she's gonna wither away if she doesn't see you right now.

By the time she slumps up the farmhouse steps, snatching her dirty flannel and swinging it over her shoulder, she doesn't know how she's still standing. Her thighs are quaking from exhaustion, just barely carrying her through door and into the kitchen. But then she sees you, her lovely wife, finishing up dinner and looking as gorgeous as ever, and it's like the weight of the day is erased, lifted from her shoulders.

You spin around to look at her, having heard her slumping through the house in her big ol' work boots. The grin on your face makes her heart flutter, your lipstick perfect as always and your arms held out for a hug. You're absolutely gorgeous, as beautiful as the day she met you, and Abby's just so glad to be back with you.

"Heya there, darlin'," She drawls as she slumps over to you, melting into your outstretched arms.

You wrap her up in a hug, not caring about how sweaty she is, just wanting, needing, to hold your girl. "Mmm, hi baby, ya done with the field?"

"Mhm, finally done plowing. Gonna do one last check tomorrow and then get to planting, hopefully," She mumbles into your hair, feeling your hands trailing up and down her back. It's good, but not enough. She groans, melting into you and pressing a kiss to your cheek, huffing out a sigh.

"Everything alright there, big girl?"

"Mmm, my back's sore 'n your hands feel real good."

"Aww, maybe, after dinner and after you shower, I could give you a massage? How's that sound?"

Abby hums, squeezing you and kissing your forehead before pulling back and pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. "Sounds incredible, sugar. What did I do to deserve you?"

"You're Abby Anderson, 's more than enough baby," Your voice is soft, whispered against her lips like a prayer. When you pull away, you giggle at the remnants of lipstick on her lips. With a swipe of your thumb, you wipe it away, giggling at her pout. "Now go sit down, I'll bring you a bowl."

Abby giggles, trailing towards the kitchen table and sitting down, smoothing her hands down her thighs as she sits. She eases into her usual manspread, rough denim pulled taut over her thighs. Your eyes catch on them when you walk over with two bowls of stew, a loaf of freshly baked bread tucked under one arm.

“Mm, thank you darlin’, this looks delicious,” Abby hums, watching as you sit down. She gently takes the bread knife from the center of the table, slicing off some of the loaf and handing it to you before cutting her own piece.

When she leans forward to eat, elbows on the table in a complete lack of dining etiquette (though neither of y’all ever really cared for it), she groans. The tightness in her back is striking with a vengeance, egged on by the promise of relief at the hands of her wife.

"Oh honey," You murmur, frowning at her.

"Mm, 's okay. Just a lil tight," Abby says, giving you a tight smile. She gets through the rest of her meal with minimal movement, having to sit up straight like her dad always said she should. By the time y'all are done, she's dying to get into the shower and wash off all the grime that had settled on her skin.

While she's off showering, you set your plan into motion. Y'all have a habit of leaving out pajamas for each other, whenever you can. Since you're gonna give Abby a massage when she's out, you should pick pajamas that give you easy access, right?

So you leave a pair of soft grey boy shorts on the bathroom counter, and nothing else. All in the name of having full access to her back, of course.

Then you run to grab one of your body oils from your vanity, a rosemary one that would smell delicious with her body wash. You set it out on the bedside table, alongside some water and a hair clip for Abby. And, for good measure, you reapply your lipstick.

You can hear Abby step out of the shower, can hear her scoff and giggle when she sees the 'pajamas' you laid out for her. When she steps out of the bathroom, hair damp and just barely covering her nipples, soft cotton stretched over her ass and hips, she looks delicious.

"Now what's this about? Thought you were offering to give me a massage outta the goodness of your heart, turns out you just wanted me naked, huh?" She chides, walking over to your position on the bed, kneeling and looking all pretty for her.

When she leans into to kiss you, you press one hand to the center of her chest and keep her at bay. "I am gonna give you a massage, now lay down on your tummy, big girl."

"Yes ma'am."

You let her get situated, laying face down on the bed with her arms folded up under her head. You watch the way her back shifts, muscles rippling as she gets comfortable. She's beautiful, a goddess, and you want to spend the rest of your life worshipping her.

Once she's settled in, you straddle the backs of her thighs, eliciting a nervous giggle from her.

"Whatcha doing there, honey?"

She sounds so giddy, you almost feel bad that you're not gonna give her anything right now. "Settle down big girl, just trying to get access to your back."

You swear you can almost hear her pout when she says, "Okay :(."

She hands you the body oil from the bedside table, settling back into position as you uncap the bottle and pour a small amount into your hand. Rubbing it between your palms to warm it up, you then place your hands on Abby's back and start spreading it over her muscles.

You can feel how tense she is, noting which spots are gonna need the most work as you coat her sore muscles in a thin sheen of oil. Everything is so warm and hazy, since you'd turned off the main lights and left only a few dim lamps and some candles on while Abby was showering.

Abby, for her part, is already in heaven. She's always had a thing about feeling your body weight on her, as in she fucking loves it, so the feeling of you sitting on her thighs is already making her head all fuzzy. To add to it, your hands, soft from gentle work – courtesy of Abby, who never lets you do the rough work on the farm that has calloused her own hands – feel so fucking good on her back. Your touch always melts her into a puddle, but when it's combined with the slick slide of oil and a gentle massaging at her sore back? God, she's melting faster than an icecream in the summer sun.

With every pass of your hands over her sore back, she's whimpering and sighing, and you can feel the heat in your lower belly growing warmer and warmer. It wasn't your intention to get this aroused, but when Abby looks so sweet, so submissive, under your touch, how could you not?

You refocus your attentions, working the knots out of her upper and middle back with a firm press of your hands. The groans she lets out every time you hit a tough spot make you shaky, sounding far too close to the noises she makes when you're pressed up against her. It makes you nervous, giddy with excitement at just how much you want her, how much you want to please her. You're so distracted by the thought and image of her, needy under your touch, you barely notice when she starts talking.

"Mmm, that's good baby, I think you got it all," She murmurs, sounding utterly boneless. She's limp under your touch, the drowsiness creeping in.

"I'm not done yet baby, you're also tense," You mumble, slowly dragging your hands down her back, thumbs massaging at her back dimples, "down here."

Abby lets out a soft, "Oh", before whimpering at the feel of you in massaging her hips. Even if she usually doms, the feel of your thumbs in that very specific spot conjures up images of her on her hands and knees, staring at herself in the mirror while you bounce her back onto your cock, the slick noises of her cunt making her flush bright red. It makes her press her face into the mattress, blush creeping higher and higher as your hands slide lower and lower, until your finger tips are trailing at the waist band of her undies.

"Can I take these off?" You ask, leaning down to press a soft kiss between her shoulder blades.

"Mhm, please," Abby begs, her voice sweet and whiny, face still shoved into the mattress. It makes you giggle, even as you hook your fingers into her panties and pull them down, unfairly slow. You're drooling by the time her ass if exposed, but you almost moan when you see the string of slick and the wet patch left on her panties. You drag them all the way off, throwing them in the general direction of the bathroom.

Once they're gone, her gorgeous ass is completely exposed to you, but her pretty cunt is hidden, her thick thighs allowing you only a glimpse of her slick folds. Abby's breathing is heavy, and you can tell she's trying to stay composed even as you drip more oil onto your hands and rub them together.

Abby whimpers when you run your hands up her thighs, cupping under her ass and massaging the fat of it. You slide your thumbs up, spreading her ass apart and making her whine at the feeling of her pussy being spread open. You haven't even really touched her and she's leaking, for fuck sakes, her pussy made a slick lil noise when you spread it apart.

"Aw, baby, you're this needy already?" You chide, massaging her ass and watching her clench around nothing. A little dribble of slit leaks out of it, and you can't stop yourself from letting your thumb wipe it up, popping your thumb into your mouth and moaning at her taste.

"You've been, shit, you've been teasing me this whole time," She whines, wiggling her ass for you. You giggle, catching sight of the lipstick ring left around your thumb and feeling an idea grow in your head.

"Abby, get on all fours if you want me to fix that," You order, leaving one gentle swat on her ass before sliding off her legs, letting her scramble into position.

Everything about her makes your mouth water, from the slick sheen of oil and sweat on her body to the arch of her back, and the way she spreads her thighs just enough to give you a good look at her aching cunt.

"You're such a good girl, Abby, did so good," You murmur, getting behind her and rubbing at her ass, your tone soft and teasing as you slip into a more dominant role. She whines, wiggling even more as you lean forward, pressing a kiss to the swell of her ass.

When you pull back, you nearly moan, your idea having come true. Left on the plush fat of her right asscheek is a perfect lipstick mark, and the rest of her freckled ass and thighs are just begging for more marks. You giggle, pressing more kisses all over her ass and thighs.

Abby's confused, loving the attention but not knowing why you're just kissing her when her pussy is right there, needy for you. She nearly starts crying when you slide off the bed, grabbing something from the vanity and running back. The next time she feels you kiss her ass, it's a little wetter, stickier than before.

"What're you doing back there?" She asks, head a little fuzzy from your kisses.

"Mm, I could show you. Are you okay with me taking a picture of you?" You ask, pressing more kisses down her thighs, framing her pussy in pretty little kisses.

Abby swears she blacks out for a second, the sheer hotness of the question making her dizzy. "Yeah, yeah, of course, go ahead."

You hum, pleased with her answer and the desperation in her voice. Swiping your phone from the edge of the bed and opening up the camera, you point it at Abby. She looks gorgeous, completely needy and covered in lipstick kisses, slick dripping down her thighs and pretty hole aching for you. The hair around her pussy is slicked down, dark with wet, her bush wet and framing her clit. Her clit, large and swollen, is just peeking out of its hood, and she looks absolutely debauched. You take the picture and hand her your phone, waiting for her reaction.

Abby is staring in awe, not entirely convinced that's her. She looks so slutty, and it makes her hot all over. She lets out a little "oh lord" before handing you the phone.

"Mhm, that's all you pretty girl, you look absolutely gorgeous," You murmur, scratching your nails down the side of her thigh. She whines, arching her back even more as she shoves her face into the mattress.

"Uh huh, the prettiest, being so good for me," You whisper, bending down to press a trail of kisses all the way to her cunt. You lick a stripe from her clit to her hole, making Abby whine and scramble for purchase on the plush bedding.

You lap up the slick leaking out of her hole, spreading it over her clit before laving at it with the flat of your tongue.

"Fu-fuck sugar," Abby whines, bucking back into you. You grip at her thighs, trying to hold her in place as you dig in, pressing a kiss to her entrance before wiggling your tongue in. You fuck her with your tongue, listening to her whimpers before pulling back and spreading her pussy apart with your thumbs.

"Hmm, got the prettiest pussy ever," You tell her, watching her squirm under your attention. She tries to shift her thighs closer together, but stops at your disapproving hum.

With one hand, you trail two fingers down her cunt, pressing into her clit before dragging back up and teasing her hole. You want her to beg for it, and beg she does.

"Shit, baby, please, please fuck me," She cries, pressing back into you and trying to push your fingers in. You chuckle, loving how needy she is and not wanting to torture her too much.

"Hmm, good girl," You hum, as you press two fingers into her cunt. Abby moans into the mattress, loving the stretch. When you're in to the hilt, Abby clenches around your digits, a shiver running up her spine.

You lean down, angling your hand so you can both fuck her with you fingers and eat her out. You leave little licks at her clit, starting to fuck your fingers in and out of her, curling them just enough to try and press at her g-spot. When you get the right angle, pushing up against that gushy little spot, Abby wails, pressing back against you and clenching.

You hum against her clit, sucking on it lightly while pressing against her g-spot, feeling her leak around your fingers.

"G'so good baby, hmmm– fuck" She whines, her voice muffled into the comforter.

You can feel her thighs twitching, and decide she's getting too close too fast. Pulling off of her clit, you trail your tongue around her pussy, from the edge of her hole, where she's taking your fingers so well, to the spot right under her clit, teasing her with the almost-stimulation. You keep toying with her, avoiding her clit even as you finger her, driving her insane.

"C'mon baby, please, I wanna cum, please - fuck, 'wanna cum for you," She whines, kicking one leg and bucking back into you.

"Aww, my needy girl, you wanna cum?" You tease, leaning up to curve your body over hers and press a kiss behind her ear.

"Yes, yes please, ma'am, please, I need it," She cries, turning her head to look at you, making your heart skip a beat. Her cheeks are flushed, her eyes blown out and her lips plumped up from biting at them. She's beautiful, your angel and your love, and you feel the overwhelming. need to please her.

"You're so good for me Abby, 'll make you cum," You murmur, pressing a soft kiss to her lips before sliding back down. You take one glance at her ass and thighs, still covered in smeared lipstick marks. Pressing one more kiss to her ass, you dive back into her cunt, licking and kissing and sucking at her clit, making out with it as you fucking her even harder.

Abby whines, dropping her head onto the bed and arching her back even more, letting you play with her pussy. You can feel her getting closer, the excess slick, the tremble of her thighs, the clenching of her walls around your fingers. She's almost there, she just needs a little something. And god, you deliver.

You spit on her clit and suck on it, massaging her g-spot with no mercy as you stimulate her sensitive little nub, moaning against her when Abby wails, pussy convulsing around your fingers and her whole body shaking. She's a wreck, pushing back against you and babbling into the bed. Her clit throbs under your tongue, a twitchy mess.

You fuck her through it, feeling her drip around your fingers, leaving a ring of creamy cum for you to lick up. She squeals as you punch at her g-spot, extending her orgasm as she clenches around you, keeping your fingers inside her.

Slowly, you ease your fingers to a stop and pull out, pressing a kiss to her clit before pulling away. Abby lets her breathing even out, feeling as you rubbing her hips, waiting to see what she needs. Abby lets out a blissed out sigh and sits up on her legs, reaching back for you to wrap your arms around her.

You do, hugging her from behind and laying your head on her shoulder, pressing kisses to the muscle. "How're you feeling baby?"

"Hmm, perfect," She hums, tilting her head to kiss your temple, "You're so good to me."

"You're so good to me, Abigail, I love taking care of you," You mumble, meeting her in a soft kiss. It's so gentle, and you can feel her trying to push every ounce of love into this kiss. It's heart achingly sweet, like every moment you have with her.

"Mm, gonna let me take care of you now?" She asks, catching you of guard as she turns around and eases you back onto the bed. "Because I think you're also feeling a lil tense. Strip and hand me the oil."

ahhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[koolades-world]

Hi, hopefully it's still before the 5th for you bcz idk, bcz of the time zones 😭 Asmo and the number 40 would be cute imo. Congrats on 2k, that's a huge number! You must be really proud of yourself! Wish ya even more! 💕

thank you! don't worry you were on time!

so glad to see the asmo lovers come out of the woodworks for this event. i'll compile a masterlist once i complete the final request tomorrow but i think he got four requests which might be the most!

enjoy <3

prompt 40 w/ Asmo

Although Asmo was the avatar of lust and was famous for his physical beauty, you were surprised at just how many people overlooked the other beautiful things about him. Maybe it was just because they didn't know him like you did, but you could argue that his inner beauty rivaled that of what he showed off daily. There was no doubt that he was gorgeous, but he had many other glowing qualities.

You adored his mannerisms, like the way his hand always found it's way into yours when you walked side by side and the way he always looked out for you. He always scanned a room, looking specifically for you, and the way his face lit up when he saw you was adorable. You could help but melt at every time he went out of his way for you and appreciated you for you, and not what you stood for. You couldn't imagine your life without him. He always found a way to seamlessly add you to his packed schedule and you felt as if you were together more than you were apart.

One of your favorite things about him was his laugh, which was surprisingly something he didn't talk about much. He admitted to you once while drunk that the reason for this was because he didn't like it. You'd tried to comfort him in the moment, but he'd moved on and ran off before you could. After that, it hadn't come up again and you didn't want to drag down his mood. Any time he laughed at a joke you made, or when he saw one of his brother do something stupid, you thought about how much you loved it. To you, it was like the sound of the last school bell of the day. Hearing it instantly made you day better every time you heard it.

You couldn't fathom why he hated it, since he was the most handsome individual you'd ever met, inside and out. But, you always never pestered him about it because you knew what it was like to be insecure and dislike something about yourself. It was human, after all. Despite all that though, you'd always hoped that it might come up naturally one day and you could tell him you adored it.

"Mc, sweetheart, do you want another sweet tea?" Asmo got up and stretched his legs. Since the weather permitted it, the two of you, and his brothers were having a beach day. At first, it was just the two of you, but one by one, his brothers invited themselves along until they all wanted to go. Asmo didn't want to give up your time together, so he made his brothers promise they'd give you space. You knew that wouldn't last long, but you let him has his moment.

"No thanks. I'm still working on this one." You gestured to the half full glass beside you.

"Alright." He walked around behind your chairs to the cooler and refilled his own glass. He sat back down once he was done. Rather than shut his eyes again, he watched his brothers fool around closer to the water. Mammon and Levi were fooling around knee deep in the water. After a well timed, swift push from Levi, Mammon feel into the water. It must've been deeper than it looked behind him, because he got totally submerged. He came back up about a second later, furious at Levi. He tried a couple times to shove Levi back but failed every time. Asmo burst out laughing like he hadn't in a while, swatting your arm a couple times to make sure you were watching. While what Levi and Mammon were doing was undeniably funny, you couldn't tear your eyes away from Asmo.

"What? I know I'm beautiful." He swept his bangs aside and smiled at you, fluttering his eyelashes.

"You have such a pretty laugh is all." Asmo seemed a little surprised at your words. He opened and closed his mouth a couples times before shutting it all together. "Really, you do. I love it."

He wordlessly started at you, before responding with a quiet, "Thank you." The rest of your afternoon together was just as it had been before, but you caught Asmo giving you significantly more lingering looks. That night, his Devilgram post about you beach trip was very sweet and was mostly pictures of you and him together. He sat down with you after dinner and gave you a hug, and insisted on cuddling. You noticed he started to laugh more after you'd told him that. How wonderful it was to see how far one sweet compliment could take him. You were glad you could uplift him in the same way he uplifted you countless times.

[py-dreamer]

Ooop- so it's almost mid september...

Y'know what that means?

Yea so we have a return of the stickers!!!

Well less stickers and kinda whatever this is Ig

Don't get me wrong I'm still super proud of it! I suppose it was meant to be like stickers from last year but it kinda escalated and sort off got a wee bit out of hand...

...just a tad bit...

Woooh! So anyone who's in the KNY hotpot might recognize this style and yes I did basically use the KNY birthday art format but COME ON!!!

IT'S SO CUTE!!!

LOOK AT MAH BOIII SITTING ON THAT CAKE!!!

I JUST WANNA NOM BIG BITE!!!

(If you can't tell I do really like this cake art)

I promise this time it is really 10 days till my actual birthday unlike the whoopsie 11 I did last year -_-'

And I know it's not Mk's birthday even though it looks like it is, I know. But it's the bloody format of the art and Idk how else to change it. Besides I think they slay in those birthday outfits.

And it was fun to do my sticker style in a bigger thing!

But Idk if it's cause I haven't touched my bloody stylus in ages or I've been swimming in the KNY hotpot for too long BUT WHY WAS MK'S FACE SO HARD TO DRAW FROM THE FRONT VIEW!!!

I HAD TO COMPROMISE, MANS LOOKING TOWARDS THE SIDE!!!! LIKE XIAOTIAN I LOVE YOU AND WANT TO SQUEEZE THEM CUTE LIL CHEEKS OF YOURS BUT WHY ARE YOU SO HARD TO DRAW FROM THE FRONT!??!?

HE LOOKED LIKE A BLOODY CAT WITH SLIT EYES Y'ALL!!!

Oml...regardless, I did have a lot of fun with this and had lots of fun with the decorations and such. If you were here last year, your keen memory and astute eye might notice that the cake is the same cake I used in the 'shenanigans in space' birthday stickers I did last year!

@leesbian42, @cats-and-confusion remember that lol?

So the tiny memory flower thing and star candies are an homage to that :)

(btw, pssttt @emerialyncodevenice I know we haven't talked in a while but you mentioned that you liked the bloomin cake and was thinking of using it. Feel free to use this if you like, Idk how just credit me m'kay?)

But anyways, if y'all wanna use this pic, again. Pls credit me.

AND NO REPOSTING PLEASE!!!

The decorations are meant to be sugar cookies and idk what the icing is. Since I'm thinking more of an east asian fruit cake (those really really soft fluffy spongy ones) I was thinking more like light yellow dyed whipping cream and less buttercream.

Maybe even some kinda custard Idk...(does custard go well with cake?)

The orange chunks are meant to be like mango balls or chunks and hopefully the red thingys in the middle read across as strawberries

I had to include the Monkey king plush, he's just so little!

I was tempted to draw in the other characters as plushies since they are as important to MK probably but it's getting late and I'd already been working on this baby for like 3 hours already.

All in all, I do really like this and ngl, pray this doesn't flop.

I know my single stickers don't always do well but pls y'all I like this very much...

It is nice to compare this year's work and last year and I am proud to say I have improved at least somewhat

And as for why I rarely post, well I've gotten back from my holiday but sadly I'm at that age where work and stuff will be my main focus for the time being.

Got a lot of assignments and tests y'know...

(hell I have one due the 17th and tests to do tomorrow and here I am faffing on about legos on tumblr)

And like I said, I have been blipping and dabbing in demon slayer, read a lot more KNY fics lately (I actually have a mini sketch of kamaboko squad as hashiras, heavily inspired off of other designs but even so-, if I'm in the mood I might post that!)

But enough yapping, I'll try my best to keep up this 10 days thing

(if you don't know up till my birthday for 10 days I try to post a sticker or thingy like this one)

no promises since I am busier this year but this was a lot of fun so you'll definitely see some stuff.

(I just realized I have to keep up this level of detail in my other stuff T^T save meeeeeee plsssss)

[morose-melodies]

hiii! can u write yan capitano, or yan pierro, or yan pantalone with a darling that is very private and mysterious? in a sense that there is no information about darling or anything abour darling. thank you! ❤

untold past | yandere! pantalone x reader

content warning: brief mention of animal death and stalking??? idk what to call it but pantalone does background checks on reader!!

your routine is simple and remains the same.

you do nothing out of the ordinary and you're always content no matter what. you keep to yourself and don't go out much.

you have a pet cat and you moved to snezhnaya six months ago but where you're from originally is unknown. you live with a roommate, an older woman, and work with the adventure guild.

that's everything pantalone knows about you. that's all he can know about you. he has done multiple background checks on you but surface-level information seems to be the only thing he can get from it.

and it's starting to become a problem.

it started five months ago, a month after you came to snezhnaya. there you were, at a park, feeding cats, whilst gently cooing at them, what you were doing was sweet but he paid no true interest and went on his way.

a week later, he walked past the park once again and there you were, feeding the cats once again this time he called out to you, "excuse me?" you paused and turned to face him, your face flushed from the cold weather.

"yes?"

"could those cats be yours? if so, why haven't i seen you around before?"

"I like to pretend they are." you laughed, ignoring his last question and your laughter was sweet so he smiled.

"hm, take good care of those cats. some kids have been coming around and bothering them." then he walked away, not waiting for a reply.

the next week, he passed by once again, this time, he had you in mind when he passes, wondering if you'd be there and you were, with one less cat.

"hi," you waved at him and he paused in his steps, a small smile growing on his lips, as he motioned to the group of cats in front of you, "hello... there's a missing cat, did something happen?"

"I think he ran away... I'm not sure," you smiled, but it seemed doubtful and perhaps hesitant.

"what a shame."

"yeah, I'll probably go looking for him tomorrow," you pursed your lips as you ran your hand across the back of one of the cats.

tomorrow, huh?

"well, I wish you the best of luck... i never got your name."

"it's (y/n)."

"well, I wish you the best of luck, (y/n)."

(y/n)... pantalone smiled as he walked away.

later that night, when pantalone was alone with his thoughts, he thought about you.

you like cats, that's nice.

you seem kind.

you wear thick coats, the expensive kind.

along with the expensive kind of hats.

you must always be so warm.

a pen slowly rolled from his desk and dropped to the floor, causing pantalone to stop thinking of you and continue his work.

... should I help (y/n) tomorrow?

...

the next morning was cold and seemed still.

most people were still sleeping at this time, but not you, because you need to find a cat.

you shivered from underneath your coat as you walked through the park. this was out of the norm for you, you usually wouldn't wake up so early or come to the park two times in the same week.

this ruined your routine, but hopefully, it would all be worth it at the end. "where are you, louie?" louie was the cat's name you decided to give him.

near the front of the park, pantalone stood, hands pocketed and eyes weary. he stayed up last night, he thought about you and if he could come to help you.

this foreign feeling inside of his chest was starting to bother him, more and more. he decided to drop by the park and was going to make it seem like a coincidence, speak with you then leave.

and perhaps never speak to you again.

"where are you, louie?" you called out again, peaking behind trash bins, into hollowed trees and bushes.

"louie?"

you paused and turned to see the man who would occasionally walk past the park while you were here, "louie is the cat's name. if you saw him, you'd understand his name," you smiled.

"well, how does this louie look?" pantalone asked and you rubbed your chin before saying, "he's orange and kinda chunky and has a few dark brown spots on his back."

"oh, he sounds adorable, " but not as adorable as you, "ill keep a watchful eye out for him," pantalone smiled when he noticed your eyes light up, "thank you. he's a good cat, i wouldn't want him to get into trouble. "

...

trouble, huh?

pantalone passes the park every day, wondering when you'd be there, wondering if you'd go there for any reason other than to feed the cats which you only do on saturdays.

it was getting dark out as he passed by, but in the corner of his eye, he saw a cat. he paused, before glancing over to it and if he was correct, it was louie.

but louie didn't seem to have any life left in him. "... what a shame," he really wanted to bring louie back to you, alive. he wanted a reason to approach you, in a positive way, he didn't want to tell you louie was dead.

pantalone sighed, before continuing his walk home.

...

"did you ever see louie?" you asked, a wool scarf muffling your words as you spoke. pantalone hesitantly nodded.

it didn't take much to figure out louie was dead, considering he was nowhere to be seen. "he's dead?" you asked for confirmation and pantalone nodded once again.

"did he die naturally?"

"no. what happened to him was far from natural."

you pursed your lips, your gaze lowering, "that's a shame. he was a good cat, very cuddly. "

then you lifted your gaze to pantalone and said, "I never got your name, what is it?"

"pantalone."

...

it seemed to pantalone that you were the only thing he thought of. amid work, he thought of you and in the dead of night, he thought of you.

but who are you?

he knows barely knows anything of you. all he knows is your name and that you like cats... perhaps he should look into you a little.

just a little.

...

your routine is simple and remains the same.

you do nothing out of the ordinary and you're always content no matter what. you keep to yourself and don't go out much.

you have a pet cat and you moved to snezhnaya six months ago but where you're from originally is unknown. you live with a roommate, an older woman, and work with the adventure guild.

that's everything pantalone knows about you. that's all he can know about you. he has done multiple background checks on you but surface-level information seems to be the only thing he can get from it.

and it's starting to become a problem.

[anipgarden]

Oh yeah just because I feel like rambling

If my garden plans work out as intended it's gonna be absolutely banging this year. The only thing that could stop me is my bad watering memory skills, my bad weeding skills, and my tendency to step on things on accident.

But even with just the vegetables and fruits the plan is

Tomatoes. Hoo buddy the tomatoes. Last year I had 12 tomatoes (6 romas and 6 beefsteaks) but the 6 cells I picked up had extras in them, which means if I separate them well enough I can get 7 beefsteaks and 14 roma tomato plants. I'm gonna have to find space. But goddammit I will find space.

Peppers. Just sweet banana peppers this time for now (bellpeppers grow too slow for too little reward imo) but I picked up a 6 cell of those. I've also still got some plants that hung on for the entirety of winter (Florida for the win) so whether or not those stay where they're at is. A Decision I'll have to make tomorrow.

I've already planted carrots and peas that are starting to come up, but I might plant more because I didn't get as many as I was hoping for by the tomato cages. I also planted lettuce seeds, cabbage seeds, and green onion seeds that I've seen not much results from so if those pop up they pop up but otherwise I think its a bit late to plant more? I'll recheck the extensions site.

I'm gonna try growing watermelon again!!! I got 3 bags of compost and at least one and a half of those bags is gonna be dedicated to making a nice mound to plant seeds in. The year we used fresh compost was the year they grew best, but trying to reuse the same mound in later years yielded not much in the span of results. Time for new compost on a new mound.

I'm gonna try growing zucchini and squash again this year! Some in my bins (might need a soil refresh, hence more compost) and some in the ground (we'll see how it goes). Hopefully if I start them now instead of waiting till April (I did NOT know I could plant them as early as late Feb until like 3 weeks ago in my area) then they'll get to a decent size before the snails and slugs get voracious. If not. We'll see what happens.

I might try growing cucumbers but idk man.

All this on top of my plans for growing swamp milkweed, purple coneflowers, rudbeckia, and more. I also still have rights over the front yard landscaping, so I'm responsible for finding more butterfly weed and liatris plants at the plant sales in April (the ones I planted in October are either still dormant or dead. Out of the 5 liatris I planted then I only see signs of 1 coming back, and none of the butterfly weeds. Fingers crossed though.)

All this to say. I'm excited! Fingers crossed, everyone!

[nextinline-if]

Hello Vi ☺️

Has anyone asked about the fake-out make-out scenario yet? I hope you have an amazing day 💛

Hi Anon! ☺️

I let your ask sit for a longgggg while, sorry anon. <3 forgive me pls.

I'm going to do Constantine today and do a different one tomorrow, etc! I'll just reblog and add :)

warning: kissing, touching, etc! (I think these are obvious but!)

uhm okay so I've never written one of these, idk if I did okay or if this wasn't 100% matching the scenario, hopefully I didn't break any rules? lol okay bye

Constantine (MC initiates)

You glance back over your shoulder, meeting Constantine's eyes as you force your feet to move. He shakes his head. "Don't stop running," he replies roughly.

You never excepted a visit to the capital to turn into a coup attempt. How did they know you were going to be here? It's only been four months since your brother abdicated and this was an unannounced outing.

You force the thoughts away and turn the corner, your footsteps pounding against the cobblestone. Up ahead, the doors to a brothel are open. You can hear the sounds of pleasure and poetry. You urge your feet forward and make for the entrance. "Follow me," you shout without looking.

Constantine's brows furrow but he does as you command. He'd follow you into a fire - a brothel isn't so different, is it?

You grab his hand as soon as he crosses the threshold, weaving you both around sweaty bodies full of intoxication and anticipation.

Once in the corner, you face each other, neither able to speak as you attempt to catch your breath. You start taking off his armor. "What are you doing?" He looks nervous as his eyes glance around, but he doesn't move to stop you.

You laugh softly, drawing his piercing blue gaze back to your face. "Your armor isn't exactly inconspicuous."

He nods. "You think they'll check in here?"

"You trust me, right?" You throw the last piece of armor behind the settee as heavy footsteps hammer their way toward the brothel.

"Of course," he says, swallowing hard.

"Good," you reply, pushing him into a seat. His eyes widen and he opens his mouth but you climb on top of him as the rebels stream through the door. There's no time to think so you crash your lips against his.

Your heart hammers in your ears. If they find you, at least you can say you went out with the feeling of his lips on yours. With the comfort of his hand in your hair, pulling you closer. Not that you care about any of that. But everyone should die in peace, right?

If this wasn't life or death, you'd almost believe he wants this. You'd almost believe you want this.

Focus, you tell yourself. Focus on the environment, not his rough lips gently caressing yours.

You can hear the lyre again and the sounds of lovers returning to their activities so you pull away. Your lungs needed air regardless. Constantine stares at you for a moment and you stare back.

"Uhm, thank you," you blurt out.

He tilts his head, "Thank...you?"

Your eyes widen and you move away, turning away to grab his armor. "For trusting me. I'm sorry for...that. I needed to get them off our trail." You take a breath, steeling your face before turning around to hand him his armor.

He takes it quickly, his face giving nothing away. "It was a brilliant plan, Your Highness."

Neither of you speaks until you reach the castle to alert the others of your escape.

[wecandoit]

hey guys. currently in a bit of a crisis (but its chill, it's fine, we're chillin) so a rant under the cut

it's the first time i've ever left an assignment to be done so last minute. technically this submission is only due 3pm tomorrow (it's currently 10:28pm) but i have to wake up at 5am to go to work and don't get home til around 4.30pm, so really, i have until 5am to finish this assignment. and it's for a unit that i really want to improve my grades on (i've got a structure down, and my sources ready, just gotta write up the five pages, do the referencing and proofing)

but really i'm just a bit terrified because i had weeks, literally weeks, to get this done but i just... didn't? and i did similar things for my last two assignments too and i just--i can't afford to do this, you know? this is my dream, and i can't believe i'm sabotaging myself like this.

i was looking into scholarships for next year bc i could really use it, and i'm just 3% away from being eligible for our uni's merit-based one. and the worst part is, i feel like i could have really easily gotten it if i had put in a tiny bit more effort last year. and yet even knowing this, i can't bring myself to get on top of my game for this semester.

i've just been wanting to sleep all the time, even though i'm constantly napping. i don't even think it's a depressive episode though, because emotionally i'm not really struggling. maybe i'm mentally exhausted? but again, i feel like i've been doing nothing all semester so idk what i'm even exhausted from.

this is my final assignment submission for the year so i'm really hoping that once the stress of deadlines is over, i can actually be productive and study for exams properly (and catch up on like half a semester of missed lectures and exams for half my units)

i'm going to take a 20 minute nap, and hopefully i'll be able to get my head in the game and finish writing this up and do the referencing. i'll try do the proofing and submission at work tomorrow.

thanks to whoever read this and i'm sorry if i got you down. sending you all my best wishes with your work/study/other endeavours<333

xx dilli

[mingos]

oof. so… hello.

i know i’m not obligated to explain my absences, but i figured i should anyway because this is actually a long-standing issue i've been dealing with that, god fucking willing, doesn't happen againーbut that is what i told myself three weeks ago before it happened again. basically, because it can sometimes be so common, kinda just want to give a heads up if i ever start acting weird or distant because apparently i've upset some people i didn't mean to.

that stresses me out because, as i've mentioned before, i kind of have this tendency to shut down completely during stressful situations and not speak to anybody, which eventually turns into friends dropping me for a perceived lack of interest (not their fault, my fault). i'm actively trying to break that habit & be okay with vulnerability, so i want to be honest about where i've been and where i could potentially go in the future if this shit happens againーin a few weeks, in a few months, tomorrow... it all just depends, it's not a situation i can control. i'm not trying to ignore people. i just deal with a lot sometimes.

content warnings immediately below the cut but idk maybe just don’t read this if you’re in a bad headspace, or a really good headspace that you don't want ruined. no one should read this, actually. just jump to the last two paragraphs. this is just me explaining i'll hopefully feel okay enough to be back by the weekend.

-

cw: alcoholism; cw: domestic abuse; cw: gen. bad mental health

　i currently live in a dysfunctional situation with an alcoholic & addict family member as the last person in our family yet to distance themselves/cut them off. reason being is they relapse a lot. like, “an average of at least once every 2-4 months since i was 14” a lot. this is a long-standing problem. they’ve been through quite literally every treatment plan imaginable and nothing has stuck.

i do love this person; the majority of the time they're not relapsing, they’re kind & loving. when it’s good, it’s good. but when it’s bad jesus christ… i gotta level with you and say i've feared for my life a couple times.

they become angry & spiteful when drunk and, as of the last few years, physical. mostly when i try to confiscate things i find because i'm "stealing their property" and it’s therefore, to their drunk mind, justifiable. this is a mindset i’m still trying to unlearn because of course i don’t deserve it—taking a wine bottle away from an alcoholic for their own good isn’t justification for them almost suffocating you in an attempt to get it back, or breaking the lock on your bedroom door—but it’s hard to internalize that sometimes when your brain is beaten down, y’know?

when not being guilted into silence so i don’t “ruin their life more” or get threatened with being removed from the house by police, i’ve pretty much exhausted any sympathy or help i get from the rest of my family. half of them either have my # blocked or don’t answer under the weird assumption my family member is going to… use my phone to contact them? which is something that’s never happened before. the other half kind of just shrug because i’m choosing to say here and am an adult with the ability to leave whenever i want, just like they did.

　but i can’t leave—because, like i said, it’s just me now. no one else checks on this person, no one else lives with us, and i’ve already had to call 911 for them multiple times. living with them during a relapse is hell but so is whenever i have to leave the house because if something happens to them or their dog that suddenly becomes my fault. basically, whenever these episodes happen it’s just several days (or weeks) of nonstop stress. but there's nothing else i can really do. i just have to put up with it & ride it out.

-

　things have finally calmed down again; apologies were made, talks were had, we cleaned out their stash together... i finally have some breathing room. kind of. i still have no energy to do anything because i've just been in survival mode the last week (& also sick), so hopefully i can be back to writing by this weekend but i really don't know. i'm still paranoid something bad is going to happen so maybe i'm not out of that mindset just yetーi need to decompress a little before i can feel normal again.

thank you for your patience, and for those who have checked on me & especially those who were understanding it was kind of hard for me to have the energy to talk outside of my one or two comfort people. i miss you all very many and hope nothing more for you all to be loved, warm & safe. love you all very many.

[starlightshadowsworld]

My brains doing that thing where it works on 2 chapters at once.

Which are You don't know what I'd do (for you) and Mamas Boy. It's werid how both are on Chapter 4.

Idk how long I'll stick doing two before I possibly end up just sticking to one. Because that happens.

If so I'll probably continue the former because it's the last chapter. And I just want to finish that. So I'll probably have that up by the end of today.

And if not also today than hopefully tomorrow, update for Mama's Boy.

You don't know what I'd do (for you) is my Bsd fic where Atsushi solves the Cannabalism arc by making a deal with Fyodor.

It's part 2 of the series, the 1st is the deal itself and the 2nd is the Agency rescuing him and comforting him in the aftermath.

Mama's Boy is the Percy Jackson fic where Jason Grace dies and comes back as a Mania.

Can find em on here or at my A03 which is SparkyIceblaze.

[cryptidsurveys]

Tuesday, July 16th, 2024.

How have you been doing? I'm a little worn out from volunteering, but otherwise, I've been doing well. Cassie was telling me that I need to stay for a full day sometime, that way I can understand what they mean about the nonsense that goes on in the evenings. Basically, over the past few months, the time they actually get off work has been pushed farther and farther back. They're supposed to get off at 5pm, but Alex said the other day that she didn't get off until 6pm (and she already comes in ~30 minutes early). There also seems to be some growing animosity/resentment between the dog & cat people. Dog people are allegedly the hold-up. I'm not sure what changed, but it wasn't like this last summer. Cattery is usually finished early, often expected to help with the dog stuff; but when they ask for the final check to be done so they can go home, they're typically left for last.

I feel like that's eventually what will drive Cassie to quit. She had somewhere she had to be last night and they dragged things out until she was like, Yeah, I need to leave. She said it was "fine" in that situation; but in the future, when she has cheer practice, she's not going to be able to wait around for them because cheer won't take work as an excuse for being late. Also, I was told that Lucy might be looking for another job. Lucy told Cassie she wasn't going to quit until she found one, but after her absence last weekend, she might have just decided to go for it.

I know I'm essentially backseat managing here, lmao, but they really need to get ahead of this turnover issue. Since I started volunteering again last summer, they've lost something like 15 employees.

Anything you're looking forward to? Hopefully going for a picnic at the Mountain Park tomorrow. I haven't been there since last autumn, which is way too long. There's a certain rock in a certain stream that I just need to lie down on for a while.

Do you or anyone you know play the violin? No.

Do you have a nice view out of the closest window? It's just a view of some houses. And today, some construction. They're doing idk what on the corner diagonal from us.

What is one of your favorite breakup songs? I don't think I'm really a fan of any breakup songs.

Do you know anyone named Georgia or George? No.

What age did you learn how to ride a bike? Without training wheels? I think I was around 6 years old.

Are you currently listening to music or watching TV? I'm not. Sometimes I will listen to music while taking surveys, but it just feels like a bit much atm.

What is your morning routine? On volunteer days: depending on the day, get up somewhere between 5:15-5:45am. I'm usually awake a bit before that, though, so I just lie in bed and listen to something on YouTube. Shower, get dressed, brush my teeth, eat breakfast, gather the remainder of my things, talk with my dad for a bit. Then, depending on the day, leave somewhere between 6:20-6:45am.

On Wednesday: wake up, brush my teeth, make myself presentable, go grocery shopping, then come home and eat breakfast.

On Saturday: wake up whenever I feel like it, make breakfast, clean my bedroom, and make some art.

Are you someone who gets easily agitated by hearing someone chewing? No. It doesn't tend to bother me.

What was the last text you sent? It was a text to my mom. We might be going to see Despicable Me 4 on Saturday, and I was like, "I'll finally find out what all those little yellow minions are about."

What did you last have to eat? Some mixed veggies with sriracha sauce and a cheese and jalapeno sandwich.

What's your favorite kind of oatmeal/porridge? If we're talking about the flavored pouches, then probably brown sugar, birthday cake, strawberry, or peach. However, I typically use plain oatmeal as my base and use fruit, peanut butter, etc, to flavor it from there.

Have you ever ate a whole pizza in one sitting? I don't think so…maybe a half, though…? In elemntary school, we used to have pizza days on Friday (was it weekly? monthly? I can't recall); if you didn't "flip a card" (their disciplinary system), then you could pay some small $ amount that I no longer recall and get a half/full pizza, a cookie, and drinks.

What are some things you are grateful for? Volunteering. Even with all the drama, I can't imagine giving it up. I feel like it's a good exercise in detachment (not that I'm so detached, lmao; I'm obviously here dishing the constant tea). Like, if you ever just want to be an observer without any real expectations or responsibility for the system as a whole, go volunteer somewhere. It's an interesting experience… It's helping me learn to step back, stop trying to control everything, and just sort of let everything play out the way it will. It's not that I've given up all autonomy to the flow, but seriously, sometimes it helps to really see just how little of this teeming, chaotic world has anything to do with me. Thought I was going to make a difference; instead, found out what a cosmic speck I am. Maybe not what I wanted, but definitely what I needed. Still a speck, but now a free speck.

What's the last thing you done while outside? Drive, I guess.

How often do you do laundry? Every few days. It just depends on how quickly it piles up.

Have you already had your birthday this year? Yes, back in March. Which feels like forever ago. June 1st feels like it was last week, but March feels like it was last year.

Last thing you done before this survey? Vacuum the living room and dining room.

Do you like sleeping with multiple pillows? I have multiple pillows on my bed, but I only sleep with one.

How many candles do you have in your bedroom? A couple.

What emojis have you used the most here recently? D; and :')

What color is your favorite shirt? I don't have a favorite shirt, but my favorite hoodie is black.

Do you currently smell food cooking? No. Oh, but at the shelter earlier, I walked out of cattery to go to the bathroom and it smelled like someone was cooking hot dogs with ketchup or something. Come to find out it was ant killer. What a wild smell for such a thing…like luring them to a picnic or something…

If you were given $1,000 to spend at one store. What's your store of choice? Walmart (groceries).

How much sugar do you consume on a daily basis? Idk.

Do you have any ice cream in your freezer? Yeah. Well, it's custard, but same basic deal. It's from Culver's. Strawberry cheesecake and mint choco-chip.

What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word "chaos"? Chaos theory, chaos magicians…etc.

Do you own anything that has an animated character on it? Somewhere.

Have you used a microwave today? Yeah.

What's the last book you read? Still in the midst of the third Dune book. I haven't picked it up in a while, though. I just haven't felt much like reading lately.

What's something that always makes you cringe? Idk.

What's a word or phrase you say a lot? My toxic trait is that I'm blind to my own annoying catchphrases.

What's something that always makes you emotional? Music. Not always in a good/cathartic way. Sometimes in an overwhelming/spiraling way.

How many times have you changed clothes today? Twice. From pajamas to volunteer clothes and back to pajamas.

What's on your mind currently? Just how busy this next week-ish feels. I hope I don't get a migraine…

In what ways have you changed over the past year? So many ways.

Do you really care about others opinions of you? Ehhhhh. Much less than I used to, but still to some extent.

What's your favorite pasta? Spirals, bowties, macaroni elbows.

Do you currently see anything yellow? Some watercolor flowers I painted.

What did you last try to do and failed? Not sure.

Does your bathroom have a certain theme or color scheme? Not really.

If you have Netflix or any streaming service.. what's your favorite shows to stream? N/a.

Are you currently wearing anything red? No.

What was the last thing that caught your eye while shopping? I'm not sure.

What's a social media site you have no interest in? Twitter, Facebook, Tik Tok…I don't even know what's out there these days because I don't keep up.

Have you ever tripped and fallen in a public place? Yeah.

When did you last buy a dairy product? Last Wednesday.

What's the last song you sang out loud? I'm not sure.

[inkofamethyst]

June 21, 2024

Okay so I started working through some problems on a website I discovered called Rosalind. It's several bioinformatics coding challenges. Harder ones unlock as you complete easier ones. It's pretty fun! Each problem has taken progressively longer to complete, sure, but I'm really loving getting back into the problem-solving mode. The one thing is that they don't give you aaaaaany coding help or hints or suggestions, so that will probably make things really difficult down the line (the best way to learn!!! (I need to maintain optimism)). Currently (almost) everything has been within my skillset, so mostly string manipulation and simple operations, and even though all of my work was probably worth a combined five hours on the eight problems (only finishing seven because I couldn't figure out probability), they ultimately weren't too bad. This will probably be what I spend my time on in the office to keep my coding skill up when I have nothing else to do.

While I should probably be learning R... I simply don't want to right now. Maybe in July after I get back from home idk.

I've also started watching music theory lectures (as opposed to just the interactive online textbook thing), and I really enjoy them! The circle of fifths is really clicking now for the first time in my life lol. I might try to also use downtime in the lab to write out my scales since I have a better understanding of how they work (kinda). It presents the textbook content in a slightly different way which I kind of appreciate, and then I can take that perspective back to the online textbook exersizes which I do for a few minutes daily. When I go home (so very soon!!!) I'm going to have to bring out ol' girl Melody and try some things, I think.

On that note (hehe), I need to think of a name for my bass!! My flute is Melody, my sax is Jasmine, my uke is Lulu... which are admittedly not very creative but I think they got a little better over time :P (Melody because flutes play melody (I was twelve, okay?), Jasmine because saxes play jazz, and Lulu for Honolulu because ukes are from Hawaii). So I think that, in keeping with tradition, the name has to be a little cheesy. I have one idea, but I don't think it's clever enough.

I haven't been eating very well lately. I'm in the process of restocking my pantry. I think I sort of just.. ran out of steam for cooking for myself. So it's been an embarrassing amount of chef boyardee, uncle ben's, velveeta... but tomorrow, I'm shaping up! Meatball stroganoff. And I have a plan for future meals, so I'll keep an eye out for sales, etc etc. Gonna get restocked! I'm shaping up! Maybe tomorrow I'll go for a walk in the morning! Maybe before even picking up my phone! Who knows!

Today I'm thankful that it's cooling down!!!! And also for the rain :) And also that the pollen is gone!!!!! After a month of suffering it was suddenly just no longer blowing into my open window :D

wait one last thing, circling back, even though I want to give my brain a break from the bioinfo problems, I inherently still feel that I've left something undone, as in I started working on problem 7 but couldn't figure out the right formula to even do the probability by hand, and even though I want to give myself a full weekend break, my brain is still passively thinking about it because I feel as though I didn't come to a satisfying conclusion. i wasnt even supposed to finish problem 8 tonight but i couldnt let it go.

so i need a distraction.

crochet it is (I'm working on my vest! it is suuuuper cropped (I'm about 2/3 through the front panel right now) and I fear my tiddies will not make it in, but hopefully it will be done before I go home so I can block it and maybe fix it? [edit, two days later: the front was just wonky because this is the first thing I've crocheted in years and I hadn't figured out my tension yet; def gonna redo it i think]).

actual last thing: surprisingly, I'm actually actively working toward several goals. like i always set them, but the past couple of weeks have been a bit of a lull. now I just feel craaazy energized.

[izzy-b-hands]

To Do for tomorrow (in theory at least, if the spoons are there to let me manage all of it)

-One last load of laundry (that idk where im gonna put bc im outta room but. I'll figure it out)

-clean bathroom sink

-swiffer all the floors (that are safely swifferable)

-double check my room and hide any sex toys still sitting out (in my defence, my toys my room my choice where they go, but also, i think a dildo can be a nice centerpiece on a desk or shelving unit top. Ties my whole room together!)

-pause the Oh God Mum's Visiting cleaning/prepping to try and gif Tyler's part in last night's concert (I fucking*screamed* when i heard the intro to his first song and saw him run out, poor Housemate was v chill abt me losing my shit in excitement lol)

-dishes, bc that's just a thing i like doing daily now. put on music, zone out for an hour and half, come back to conscious thought to a bunch of clean dishes. what more could a man ask for (I have ideas but I'll take dishes for now)

I'm writing this out, here, so when my forgetful ass is scrolling thru things tomorrow, I'll see this and won't forget to do anything

hopefully (Tomorrow Me pls don't fuck this up)

[carmenized-onions]

and i’m back with another yap session🤭okay okay, there were some parts that i forgot to mention last time so hopefully i can hit them this time and feel less insane😀

1. SYD AND TONY!!! i’ve been wanting to touch on them for a while but i never know how to do in a way that makes sense?? BUT THE FRIENDSHIP IS SO PRECIOUS, I CAN’T. they remind of the tiktok sound that’s like “we were girls together” and i literally can’t get that outta my head with them🥺 i think i just love reading about tony and the rest of the gang?? like i love seeing how they fit into the chaotic puzzle that was the beef– ESPECIALLY with all the new changes happening!! plus carmy’s reactions to tony’s dynamic with everyone is actually hilarious😭 like when he was so pressed that ppl have their own nicknames for her. like carmy, please remember to breathe LMAOOO

2. also the current chapters are still making me wanna run up my WALLS😭i don’t think i ever know peace anymore… WHAT DO MEAN THE WORSE DAY IF THEIR LIVES IS COMING?? SAVE ME?? IM SCARED??

3. and carmy’s so sick and twisted but like me too so it’s cool😎 but in all seriousness, it reminds me of that feeling of being in a 3 person friend group but knowing there’s a duo and you’re not apart of it (am i articulating this properly?? idk??) it’s such an odd feeling to be jealous of something that you know you probably shouldn’t be. like just because they’re besties, doesn’t mean that they care for you any less. but i also get his desire to wanting to be her person and not just the little brother full in but then again, you can’t even blame him for feeling like that cause WHO WOULDN’T??

AHHH THERES SO MUCH MORE I WANNA SAY but this is getting kinda long so i will hold off‼️again, just wanna reiterate how much your writing makes me wanna ascend into the divine plane; it literally so amazingggg😫 tysm for reading this certified long ass yap session🫶🏾

Cannot define enough how much I love these yap sessions, literally always feel free to send me any and all fleeting thoughts in the brain box.

aside: new chapter uhhhh Sunday probably? Maybe tomorrow possibly? Pending how fast I am. I'm trying to get the next two chapters drafts done together so I can refine the first one with the knowledge of what's gonna happen in the second. Cause n Effect, All That.

ANYWAYS, you can be incoherent-- Just so you know-- It's my job to make sense of what's in my inbox, u don't have to work on that. BUT YES I LOVE WRITIN EM, I am slowly more and more just writing bits and pieces of my own friendships and isms into them. So, they're a delight of memories, to write about. AND VERY MUCH SO WE WERE GIRLS TOGETHER. I think that's literally a line, in delivery fees, something like 'you become girls, together' cause it's just ! regress! in a good way hehe.

I love writing Tony with the idea of a season 3 Bear-- Because it's this weird thing where she is simultaneously new and old-- And everything to her is also new and old. It's this weird fucking neo-nostalgia that's really fun to chew on. AND YES HE'S SO CREASED.

I try to put myself in the perspective of the perspective I'm writing for, with whatever, and when I was writing Carmen's chapter I was like this stupid motherfucker Richie got to do all this shit and hae all these stupid nicknames why the FUCK DO YOU WANT TO SAY HI TO HIM?? RICHIE!!!!?!?!??!?! And then reading it back now, a week or so later, I was like Wow. Kind of a lot, bro. Lets both take a step back.

2. Your fears are valid. Well. Is that what I'm supposed to say here? Hm. Here's what I'll say, I haven't gotten to the bad bad part, yet. So like, it could end up being not that bad, to you guys. To me it's bad. It's really bad. But like, maybe you're fine. ALSO 3RD OR 4TH WORST DAY I SAID-- JUST THE WORST FRIDAY. Because I had to give them Top something, I just needed to get specific.

3. As the littlest sibling, 100%. I can't see myself being friends with any of my older brothers' friends, so the idea of becoming one of their friends and posthumously finding out they were best friends with my brother? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? DID THEY TELL YOU ABOUT ME? DO YOU THINK I'M LITTLE BABY LITTLE STUPID? And it's also like, just being friends with All of The Beef is like ohhhhh, I remember it took me a long time to warm up and make my way with them, but for you it was probably so easy cause you're just like that, which is why I like you so why do I feel angry about that !!!

AND ONCE AGAIN, THANK YOU THANK YOU, FEEL FREE TO YELL IN MY INBOX WHENEVER. P.s if anyone made it this far, u got me. I'm makin' a taglist. Reply/DM/Ask to be added!

But if you wanna be added,,,, you gotta send an essay in with it baby, or I simply won't it's the RULES!

p.s i really do love u so dearly for sending in your thoughts thank u thank u angel <3

[hypnotickale]

Here I was hoping my return post would be one of positivity and grandeur but instead I'm sitting here at 3am crying. If you missed incoherent rambles I got you.

A few days from now will be my birthday. I know it's not unique to feel especially down as another year passes by but the last few months almost daily I've been thinking about killing myself. The closer it comes, the more I don't know what to do. I can't spend another year like this. I can't keep on rotting away in this room with nobody to hold. It's too much. Too many thoughts. Too many nightmares. Not enough rest. I just can't.

What do I even say that hasn't been said? What is there to do? I am looking for the words to write but nothing will come out. Have I ever posted about picking out funeral songs? Are the songs you choose for the living or the dead? Should the dying get to pick? How much say should one have over how they are mourned? I've thought about it, personally I can't decide. There has always been a part of me that thinks it would be funny to meme the funeral. Try to make people laugh one more time before I'm gone. Maybe that's the part of me who wants them to take my death less seriously.

The first time I ever thought of killing myself, the only thing that stopped me was the pain I would cause family and friends. Not wanting to hurt the ones I love more than I already have. By being myself. Even now, if I do ever go through with it I made a chat bot that would hopefully keep people in the dark. Let them believe that I'm alive and well. If I could just erase myself that would be so much easier. Someway to know everyone will be 110% okay without me. No hurt feelings. No loose ends. Just a nooses end 🥁

Just so y'all don't worry. Something something BMO always gets back up. Something something brighter tomorrow. I'll probably wake up feeling better. Drinking water. Uhhhh idk what else.

Anyways. Sorry if you read all that. Not sure how much of it even makes sense. My head is spinning pretty bad. I'm gonna catch some zzz's and hope I don't wake up tomorrow morning. Have a good morning, good evening, and good afternoon

-🥬