#hopefully Im being too pessimistic here
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im being so serious besties i am not cut out for academia
#like yes i know ive had a very uniquely shit experience in doing a degree i actively not only hate but also am BAD AT#but also i just. cannot hack it#'but hella you go mental and pessimistic every single exam period' i know that but. im right also#like the other day i said to my mum how much ive just been enjoying my job recently#and how huge a deal that is bc i HATE my hometown and ive never ever considered my time here as possibly being good#and my 20s will hopefully be a lot of travelling but in between that to save easier im gonna live at home#so i dont have to worry about rent so alas that means when im saving up for my next trip I WILL BE IN MY HOMETOWN#and as excited as i am for my twenties that is one huge downside to me but i was really cheerfully saying to my mum#that literally for the first time ever ive considered it might not be too bad bc lately i have just enjoyed my job#like i enjoy the people and the work and the lifestyle of it and while it's never gonna be ideal as a means to an end it's actually good#and instead of focussing on that she went OFF on one about how she wants me to stay in education and keep getting qualifications#and she was like 'you could do an english degree you've always wanted to do english or how about open university-'#and i was just sat there blinking at her like girl.... no#like i could FEEL myself shutting down like the terror of having to return to this environment when ive got my sight so set#on that 'one more year and im done one more year and im done' mindset like that has been the only thing getting my through#is that im halfway through the course now so im closer to the other end than i am the beginning and if i can just push through#ill be free from it for the rest of my life. so the thought of immediately returning to academia even for a subject i adore? i felt ILL#and my mum apologised the next day without me even having to say anything bc she realised she kinda bulldozed me there#but i just know whether it's the adhd or ive actually been traumatised by this econ degree#(<- and im being serious there like ik 'traumatised' is a big loaded word but idk what else to use#and this degree has done so so much damage to me like it has convinced me that i am fundamentally a stupid person#to the point i refuse to add up bills when with friends or do answer any sort of intellectual question even if i KNOW i know the answer#bc ive just gone so so long of being bad at the only subject im studying like just SURROUNDED by it and being bad at it relentlessly#and i dont think people realise how damaging it is to very simply just... feel stupid all the time. but oh my god i used to be so confident#and bright and now i wont even do basic addition in front of people)#i really truly dont think i can do this again in any capacity. like the constant exams and studying and assignments#i just cant do it. maybe i just need a year or two away from it after this degree but my goddddd rn i cant see it#yes it's exam time for me can u tell. it always makes me existential and on the verge of vomiting at any given moment#i hate it here i hate it here i hate it here i dont care about iterated deletion of strictly dominated strategies shut the fuck up#hella goes to uni
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High and Low
P.2 arranged marriage
Norihisa Hyuga x reader
P.1 P.2 P.3
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Hyuga’s men showed me the way to a car before driving me to the house.
I unconsciously scoff as i look outside the window as the car moved, drops of water still hitting the ground outside, “can’t even bother to take me there personally. Mannerless” i mumbled, though it seems it was a bit too loud as his men glanced at me.
I wont deny that they also seemed a bit..scary or intimidating. Maybe its because im used to deal with business types of people and not gangs, but still, not even one of them said anything. Can’t they at least make it less obvious that they dont like me.? I sigh mentally.
After 30 minutes of drive the car finally stopped, one of the man showed me the house, and the guest room before leaving me alone..in this house, i mean at least they trust me enough to believe i wont steal or something, right?
“A win is a win, i guess” I muttered, as i settled in the new room.
After a couple of hours of cleaning and organising i was finally done, just then i felt the hunger hit me causing me to go downstairs in the kitchen to hopefully find something to eat, to my disappointment but not entirely surprised. The fridge and cabinets were quite literally empty, there was water, alcohol, seasonings powders, alcohol, a pack of cigarettes, and alcohol; seriously i hope he isnt an addict.
I rubbed my face out of frustration, the glasses were starting to feel heavier than they should, my hunger increasing and all i was surrounded by was alcohol. Im not the greatest cook, matter of fact i hate cooking but damn.
Not even 10 minutes and i was already out of the house, using the gps to navigate as apparently there is a night market.
After around 20-30 minutes of walking i finally reached it, thank god i choose to wear something comfortable, i think, as i look around. The streets were lively, alongside with lights but what caught my eye are the food stalls. I smile as I approach the stall and bought some late night snacks before finding a seat on a side walk to eat.
While i ate i couldnt help but about my situation. I thought about it so much before too to the point im getting sick of it. Work wise i can work from home, easy. Living with a total stranger, i can manage; but that stranger its him.
I close my eyes after taking a bite of the snack, while thinking of him. I have strong morals, knowing that if he cheats or raises his hands i’d leave, but, by doing so the whole bloody family tree would complain and im still in no position of affording that. Not financially, but mentally. As I am cursed after all, by being too emotional, its embarrassing and exhausting. Feeling things deeper than other.
I dont want to be pessimistic, maybe he’s not bad?
Before i had realised, i finished all my food. Should i get more? Nah, i’ll come by tomorrow. I mentally tell myself, as i looked at the time on the phone and realising that it was already past midnight.
Standing up, I started walking back, slowly and calmly while listening to some music. By the time i was back, vintage type of car was parked outside, and noise could be heard from inside. I took a deep breath before slowly opening the door with the key given to me earlier, only to find a bunch of men playing cards with a stack of money on the side. Hyuga being one of them, but he just smoked while watching them. Less then 10 seconds and all eyes were on me, the house now quiet with only music still blasting which very quickly was lowered by one of his men.
“Umm” i bit my inner cheek as i glanced at the clock hanged on the empty wall, hideous taste honestly, which showed that it was about to be almost be 2 am. “Isnt it a bit too late to be playing cards and bets?” I asked, mainly looking at Hyuga, my tone was slightly tired but genuine, not sarcastic or anything, i mean i still a nobody here after all. I know my place.
“What did you just say” a man replied as he slightly approached me, clearly with the intention of intimidation, but just then Hyuga spoke “they can play whenever they want, its my house” his tone cold yet clearly irritated “who are you to question how the stuff works around here” he says while getting up and approaching me.
“I didnt mean it with harm, its just i plan on going to sleep, cant sleep if you’re loud” i explained, calmly. A scoff escapes his lips “what do you want me to do about it. This is how here things work. Dont like it then get out” he smirks.
Ah, Now I understand, he wants me out, then too bad i tend to be petty. Had he asked nicely i probably would’ve. I smile forcefully “i’ll just use my headphones” before going to my room; needless to say that night I struggled and that was just a bitter taste of how its going to be from now on.
By the next couple of days i managed to settle in and made a routine. In the morning i worked from home while in the afternoon when the noise and chaos would start id go to a nearby cafe, even food wise i ate out for the majority or id just bought food that was quick to cook while i also noticed that Hyuga or his men never really went in the kitchen unless to grab ice or alcohol, i figured they ate out too.
My relationship with him was nonexistent, we didn’t talk or barely crossed paths and when we did, he just glared at me as if i were to be a eye sore. The same went with his men although most of them would make jokes, the mean types, like bullies, they are annoying and sometimes they got to me but of course im not going to show that.
Slowly weeks passed, everything was still the same though he did stop glaring at me at every chance. I cant deny, it was boring but I mainly didn’t like it how things were. I am going to marry the guy yet we never had a proper conversation, so i did try to approach him, mostly when he was alone at home which was rare but everytime he spouted some insults before leaving. I guess he must’ve told his gang about it as the jokes had upgraded, but can anyone really blame me? I didn’t wanted to get married to him either,but id dread it more if i’ll spend the rest of my life like this.
Having high morals doesnt help either, because i know i wont bring myself to cheat. Physically or emotionally. Therefore because at least friends is my only option.
It was a Saturday morning, i was resting on my bed reading a book, before hearing Hyuga shout my name. Weird, i think as i went downstair only to find him standing, waiting. He started to speak the minute he saw me, “you wanted to get closer right” he asks? No, more like says, in a tone as if forced. I nod slowly, “something like that” i reply wondering where it was going. “Then make a barbecue or a dinner for my whole gang and there also will be some extra guests, if it goes successfully then i’ll let you” he says with arrogance causing me to slightly get irritated but I quickly calm down. “If i cook, im sure everyone will be victims of food poisoning” i reply, honestly im not that bad, but how is he going to know that.
“Yes or no then?” He asks, bored. “For when?” I asks, preparations for such things normally require enought ti- “tonight” he blurts out “say what? You want me to cook for many people for tonight?!?” I say in disbelief. “If you dont want, say so” he replies, i sighs before biting my tongue “fine”.
(I tried to make it longer…also lmk any opinions on it)
#high and low the worst#high and low#hyuga norihisa#arranged marriage#fanfic#daruma ikka#hyuga#sword#high&low#hyuga norihisa x reader#oya high#murayama#cobra#sannoh hoodlum squad#white rascals#rude boys#smoky
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heyyyyyy *saunters saucily into your ask box* congratulations! you have written a character so appealing that i cant stop thinking about her! and considering shes an alternate version of an already fictional character, i literally have no one else to bother about the brainworms she gives me. so, youre stuck with me. (side note if you do get sick of my endless asks just say the word and i will limit myself to like. two per chapter. probably. i can be normal i promise) ANYWAY i was listening to incredible amazing bigbrained theon playlist this morning and foreigners god by hozier came upand. the way i see it, in asoiaf canon theons one of the characters with the most interesting relationship with religion. he has the conflicting background, and doesnt really seem to connect with either. which isnt bad, not every character needs tk be spiritual, yet he is also some sort of mesiah figure??? like he has visions and talks to the weirwoods and has SO MUCH religious imagery like im not gonna get into it all but dude literally got crucified?? at a stake??? shit idk man. i like it. i like the part where he swears by the seven WHILE AT THE ISLANDS BEFORE HIS DEATH BAPTISM CEREMONY bbg theyre not pagans. but but but back to quenn- i feel like this is more emphasized in her story? maybe thats just me being delusional but (she lights insence in the sept after cat leaves hahahha im normal about this i swear) shes been abandoned by ALL the gods but still prays??? and for what??? stability???? hope?????? shes can seem like such a pessimist at time, a down to earth realist at best, but SHE STILL PRAYS. to what god???? im not very eloquent with words but you should listen to foreigners god the end byeeerer
-TeaInABowl
Why, hello again ;-) You're so nice to me 🥺 I really appreciate it cause I've been dealing with some Family Issues lately ❤️
Also, you do not have to tell ME about the pain of Quen brainworms!!! Thank god I have goddcoward, Ashen_Onion, and, of course, Y'ALL to scream with about Quen with, because otherwise I'd have probably lost my mind by now. Never worry about being normal because I've spent the last year being increasingly Unnormal about Quen, with extensive daydreaming about all of the Saw traps I have/will put her in.
You've reminded me to update my Quen playlist (the link is around here... somewhere...), but I also reallyyyy need to finish my Theon playlist too... eventually...
But back on topic! Yes, Theon's relationship with religion is such an interesting part of his character, and it's something that really drew me to him while reading (as someone with a complicated/agnostic outlook on religion). He has an unusually strong connection with the North's old gods, which is especially apparent in his ADWD chapters (which are some of GRRM's best-ever chapters, I will die on this hill), and I can't wait to see how that (hopefully) intersects with Bran's journey in TWOW.
I took this aspect of Theon's character and ran with it for Quen, as she has a lot of exposure to all three of the main religions in Westeros: the Drowned God during her childhood on the Iron Islands, and the old gods + the Seven during her time with the Starks. Quen has a closer relationship with the Seven in particular, due to her closer relationship with Catelyn/Sansa/Arya/Septa Mordane (by nature of being female in this 'verse), but she oscillates between all three when the occasion calls for it.
What is she praying for? Does she even believe in any of these gods? Who knows! Quen certainly doesn't. But she'll pray to the gods of the people she loves, so their gods might protect them. Also, as my dad would put it: "there are no atheists in foxholes". This is to say, Quen will cling to whatever gods get her the hell outta this clusterfuck in one piece. And, unfortunately, she finds herself in an inordinate amount of clusterfucks. She's clusterfucks Georg, really.
"Foreigner's God" is Thee Theon song fr. We all listened to it and collectively went THEON 🫵 If anyone has any other Theon song recs, I am always open to suggestions... 👀
#ask#another ask??? you're spoiling me ;-)))))#it was also such a relief after some veryyyy unfun Family Stuff :'-)#my parents rock but my brother? call me asha the way i very much Don't Like That Asshole#A LITTLE BROTHER MAY LIVE TO BE A HUNDRED BUT HE WILL ALWAYS BE A LITTLE BROTHER!!!!!#gartin rartin rartin martin was a prophet for that line#anyway. onto chapter 40!
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Hello lovely! I was wondering if I could maybe hopefully get a Dirty Dancing, Star Wars and Game of thrones matchup? I’m 20 and use she/her pronouns. I’m bi so any gender is fine. For personality I’m creative, introverted, and individualistic. Though I’m introverted, around my friends/when I’m comfortable I can be quite talkative and humorous. However, I definitely treasure my alone time the most. Im a very big homebody and can be very hermit introvert sometimes. As for bad traits, I am sometimes the worst pessimist when it comes to myself. I’ll be fine motivating others but then when it comes to me I live by the “be ready for the worst and you wont be disappointed” As for hobbies escaping to new worlds while reading books/comics, watching movies, and playing rpg video games. My favorite genres are fantasy and sci-fi, though I do love a good classic from time to time. Apart from that, I love working out. My interests on the other hand are art focused. I’m currently in art school working with mostly digital mediums, though I sometimes work with traditional. I love my practice and everything including, game, web and interaction design, video art and visual effects, 3D modeling and character design, and digital illustration. Sometimes I whip out graphite and ink.
A list of random likes: coffee, chai tea, dark chocolate, rock/blues/jazz/80s pop/soundtrack music, statement jewelry and accessories, cafe art shows, arcades, comic book stores, purple, thai/Indian/Chinese food, roller blading to classic rock, quality alone time.
A random list of dislikes: people i am unfamiliar (I have trust issues oops) with and have to make small talk with, the biting cold, rain, non fiction, staying too close to reality and not being allowed to daydream/imagine/roam freely in my thoughts, physical touch, overly crowded areas. I think that’s it thank you!
Hi! Sorry this took so long but here it is now.
For Dirty Dancing, I ship you with...
Johnny Castle
Johnny would love your creativity and encourage you to pursuit your interests, regardless of financial and other issues.
You had known eachother since childhood. One of your favourite memories was sitting on some wall with Penny near where you all lived and pretending to bet on whether Billy or Johnny would win some fight they were having for some stupid reason you could not remember.
You had grown up together, never being apart for long. Penny had a vague memory of Billy making a joke when you were all in your early teenage years. He had claimed that you and Johnny had a magnetic force pulling you together, and that it was virtually impossible to sepparate you.
All four of you had started working at the hotel at the same time. Johnny and Penny being the first to get jobs, then they later managed to reccomend you and Billy for vacant jobs in the staff. Apart from the pay and shitty treatment from the more fortunate staff, the four of you working together almost felt like a dream that you never wanted to wake up from. You took a job working as an art teacher, running painting, drawing and many other types of classes over the weeks at the hotel.
When you found out that Penny was pregnant, you tried to be optimistic for her, but you couldn't help but be afraid. Afraid of what might happen if Max found out, of all of you losing your jobs and therefore everything. Johnny could tell. It was difficult to lie to him anyway but as Billy also joked about, you both knew eachother too well.
A part of him supposedly knowing you too well was that he knew you were extremely pessimistic about yourself, and he hated that. He wanted you to really know how he felt about you, and know how amazing you truly are.
Since it was definitely one of the bigger rooms that staff had, you shared a room at the hotel. There was a lot of empty space in the room, so the two of you converted one of the corners into a kind of art studio for you to use in your free time.
That was how the two of you often spent your free time. He loved to watch you work- your focus and dedication was inspiring to him.
When it came to romantic gestures, you both knew that you never had much money, and when you did it wouldn't last long. It was the small things that you really appreciated. Whether that was you buying him a new vinyl, him getting you a new book, or any other small gestures.
Some of the best moments of his life were the two of you, sat in your room listening to music. Whether you were deep in a conversation about pretty much anything or in complete silence, the two of you couldn't have been happier. He enjoyed your company just as much as you did his.
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For Star Wars, I match you with...
Padme
You grew up together on Naboo, which meant that you had known eachother well from a young age.
That also meant you could feel comfortable around her from a young age.Wh
The two of you share a lot of private time. Padme loves to see you being open and feeling as if you can really be yourself. Padme almost felt the same, given her political position, she needed to hide who she really was from the public. You could both be honest and yourselves when you were alone.
When Padme would leave Naboo or have to stay elsewhere for her work, she would practically count down the hours before she could return home to you. Even if it was only a few days, you would miss eachother a lot.
Padme would try to stay positive and optimistic when you found it difficult. Even if you tried to hide it, pretending to feel happy and confident around others, she would try to help you feel more confident in yourself, whether that be small gestures or larger ones.
Whilst your interests may have differed (Padme dedicating her life to politics and you dedicating yours to arts), Padme took an interest in your work. She loved your art and how unique it is.
Another thing that you both loved was reading together. Both of you would enjoy reading fiction together, often using it to escape the world that you lived in.
When you read together, there would be a comfortable silence until it was broken every now and then by one of you commenting on the book you were reading.
Given that she was forced into politics at a young age, Padme was more experienced in creating formal relationships and found romantic gestures more difficult that you would.
Often, Padme would gift you with new art supplies.
She would be fully aware of your boundaries when it came to the relationship between the two of you and your relationship with other people, especially people that you do not know well.
Since you would be uncomfortable around people you are unfamilliar with, she would do what she could to keep you out of her work. Whenever she attended dinner meetings or other events that might involve your attendence, she would try to keep them short and fast, so that you would not be uncomfortable.
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For Game of Thrones, I match you with...
Jamie Lannister
(I've only seen the first four series and avoid spoilers at all costs so sorry if he turns out of be an asshole in later series but he seems like a relatively decent person at the minute)
You had met in Lannisport years before he moved to Kingslanding.
When he moved to Kingslanding, you had already been together for quite some time so you moved with him.You
Whilst you had been with him, you had been able to be more open and confident in pursuing your interests. He loved that you felt this way and wanted nothing more than for you to be able to follow your dreams and be able to do what you are really passionate about.
When you were home together, Jamie would love to sit down with a drink of wine as you worked on your art.
As it would just about anyone, his title 'Kingslayer' would scare you. Make you feel anxious in battle. No matter how good he was at fighting, it seemed that this name was almost like a target on his back. He tried to convince you that he could protect himself, though you always worried that his title was like a challange and one day someone would be able to say that they had murdered the kingslayer.
When you moved to Kinglanding, you would spend most of your time together since neither of you really knew many other people. This didn't change as you began to get used to your new home, though you valued your alone time and he respected this, giving you space when you wanted it.
He would be aware of your discomfort around unfamilliar people and try to make sure you were rarely, if ever put in a position that could make you feel uncomfortable or anxious.
When Jamie realised that he wanted to marry you, he took you to one of the gardens in kingslanding. You spend almost an hour walking around the gardens together, talking about anything that came up.
When you reached a spot with one of the most beautiful views for miles, he seemed slightly panicked, which was not something you had seen in him before. He was fidgeting, stuttering a little and you were almost concerned.
He didn't seem to know what to say, though afterwards you were certain he would have tried to rehearse it in the mirror or in his head hundreds of times before doing it.
When he did manage to build up the confidence to get down on one knee, all he could do was ask that nessecary question.
"Will you marry me?"
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Hope this is okay for you!
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As much as it kills me, I might need to step away from writing fics and posting/updating. Maybe for a month, maybe a few until Im done with my uni/thesis, I don't know. It seems Im straining my wrists too much even when I try to be careful 😔
More on this below the cut, because I wont hide Im kinda in a very deep depressive slump rn and it's definitely gonna come through. So, keep your own mental health in mind and skip reading this post if it might end up upseting for you. Take care ❤
For those that want to know more, here goes:
My left wrist is still bothering me. The numb-staticy feeling has weakened a bit and its mostly just my thumb now, but my wrist feels very weak overall atm. And thats definitely not a good sign 😔 I dont think its the inflammation acting up again? Its only my left wrists, when the last few times it got both, and usually it manifested with my fingers hurting in a very particular way, but who knows ;/ Maybe its just strained a lot? Its prob from typing on my phone a lot too, because the staticy feeling seems concentrated around the thumb.
I dont have my usual meds at home now but I kinda dont want to take them when Im so unsure if its actually inflammation again, so for now Im using the anti-inflammatory ointment. I started yesterday and today its the slightest bit better, so maybe its working? I hope so, at least. I'm thinking of taking another week, maybe even two, completely off from writing or anything that can strain my wrists, so my left one can heal. And I'll see how it goes.
It'll make me extremely stressed about my thesis and whatnot, but I think I'll try to talk it out with my promotor, how to proceed now. He's a great guy, so I hope he'll be understanding and help me through this. I think I might ask what would happen in cae I wouldnt be able to finish this year - would I just repeat it or how it would go. I DO want to finish it now, have this three years count and even if I wouldnt go to get a degree in next few years, at least I would hogher education, y'know. That has to count for something...
So, taking all this in consideration, fics are unfortunately what falls down the list of priorities, as much as it breaks my heart ;_; If I want to focus on finishing this and my thesis and getting it all done while my wrists are so fragile, I need to cut on other straining things. I prob wont stop writing wholly, only because it would prob make me go insane, I need the comfort my fics give me, but it'll be far less and the updates or posting would happen rare ;_;
So the next LitA update will prob happen in a month, cause 20th of April is its posting anniversary and chap 25 is mostly post-ready too, but then I have no idea. Depends on everything mentioned above.
I might switch to more of hand writing in my notebooks, maybe start on my Beauty and the Beast AU this way since its comfort fic and Im not in rush with it in any way. Maybe I'll dictate some from time to time, if I have the mental strength and fortitude for it xd But my focus needs to go into my uni and all. After all, the sooner I have big progress with it or finish it, the sooner Im "free".
It might also turn out this is just my depressive slump talking and it'll turn out to not be so bad in some time xd Who knows, for now I wanted to give y'all a heads up.
Some of y'aal will prob move on, which I totally get, thats how fandom works and I've been there;p But I hope some of y'all will still get some joy out of my fics, whenever they might come in future.
Hope y'all are weel and healthy out there, all the love 💗
#personal#Raksh posts#on my fics#on updates#I wrote this whole thing on my phone laying down on my desk#typing with mostly my right pointer finger#and my arms are getting tired so I'll leave it here#I wanted to make myself puzza dougg#but with how weak my left wrist is#I'll prob need to pass on that 😔#anyway thats for an update#hopefully Im being too pessimistic here#and it gets better#all the love for y'all ❤❤#thanks for reading my fics 💗💗#and dealing with my nonsense;p#I'll get to writing back to y'all in a bit#when I feel up to it mentally#and my wrists let me#💗❤💗
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do u ever just sit here and think like. well i was sure born in a country
#i know its like three posts in a row about this but im sad on my period ok bear with me#that gulf thing is just so.#this governmeeeeeeeeent i hate it#and we've got so many more years to go both nation wise and statewise#so im just sitting here like what r u gonna do#can't move to another country just to hopefully avoid being hate crimed for an extra reason#staying here means putting up with [waves hand vaguely] this#and going out and voting means nothing bc its all so corrupt on all sides my one vote is practically meaningless#maybe i can go on a march or two but i cant organize because i dont want to be killed#the spokesman for the yaqui tribe just got murdered a few weeks ago#im not gonna be that guy! even tho i care!#and even IF my vote counts whos to say they're not just gonna waltz in kidnap that mfs children and have him pull out#or just dispose of him#or dispose of members of whatever political entourage i can join etc etc#cant be a journalist that'll definitely get you killed too so#literally What can you do.#im being overly pessimistic rn but whew sometimes it feels like this#and knowing that we're not in a vacuum and knowing how to follow up the threads of history that led to this doesnt make it any better#it just makes it vaster and more complicated and much more difficult to undo#nevermind the fact that IF we ever got a competent motherfucker elected AND if WE didnt kill him then the us would just reach down#and sink its grubby little hands in is just....... :)#lovely.#anyway rip this country ig#psa newsmen still at large
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What will life be like this summer?
As u can tell by the pictures, none of us are mentally stable 🥰 so yay hopefully this summer wont suck so if u wanna know choose, I guess?
Pile 1 / pile 2 / pile 3 / pile 4
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Pile 1
Ok soooo summer will start off very good with lots of strength and just motivation in general as it progresses it gets even better ( u got the lovers sooo 👀) i see a relationship or situationship blooming it's like going out and meeting new people. It's all fun and games until it's not. U see u probably have commitment issues and this won't just disappear and get resolved over summer so u kinda will fuck up this relationship. It's like u wanting or deciding to leave for some reason but also not even being committed EVEN to that ( like breaking up and making up every other week) not to scare u but i get jules and rue vibes from euphoria from this reading and I actually see u as jules. Another thing i see is not having money like being broke and shit which if u r a teen that make sense so dont worry, that doesnt seem to be the main focus here rather the main focus is partying, lots of laugh, messing around and fucking up.
Pile 2
Broke.
Lmaooooo okay wait i swear this is not it. So beside financially struggling I actually see u having lots of fun like partying( if ur an introvert maybe just hanging out with with ur close friend(s)) and shit. I don't actually see u having any plans or even if u do have plans u won't actually work on them lmaoo which is totally okay, u know it's summer it's not meant to be strict, ur just meant to do whatever u feel like. Buttt noww this is a big but bc shit kinda gets complicated u see u will be lied to ( this can even be u deceiving urself) almost like there's no clarity like something is holding u back from seeing the truth, now whatever this is ( whether it's someone else or urself that wrongs u ) u wont get justice for it. They'll get away with it. *** i have a reading on "what to do about the situation at hand" or something like that, go through my acc see if u can find it and save it up for future reference when u encounter that said situation i talked about bc that will actually have ur answer***
Pile 3
Not to be pessimistic but this is the most negative pile until now. Soo if u dont wanna read just leave it.
Ok so onto the real shit, u seem to have a choice to make, to be exact it's between two things that u will very much not be able to balance both together, and that's the exact reason why u must choose. But i must warn u, keep ur expectations as low as possible bc i can see u thinking u have the clarity to choose the right option but i dont see a right option here. It's like choosing between two things when u want both of them. There's no winner here. So go with whatever u want to but don't expect much.
Pile 4
This is the messy pile lol. A lot seems to be going on first of two people will offer u something ( i see it as relationships). Guy number 1 is young and boyish, it's like someone not exactly playful but he's very cheesy like he dont seem to be ur type whatsoever and he genuinely seems to have good intentions. Guy number 2 on the other hands i dont really good vibes like he seems sneaky and shit ( i see a toxic cancer now if u know anything about cancer guys u would know what im talking about).
Now how exactly will u respond to each of them? Well for number 1 lmaoo u aint gonna really like him like u seem very closed off toward him so nah this one is a no from u. While for the 2nd guy ya that wont work too, u know why? I see a lot of reasons for one he seems like a cheater and u can tell, he's also manipulative and u see that too, rude af, malicious so let's just say he's not the best person. So u be getting love offers and u will probably refuse them all and honestly good for u bc one is boring as hell the other is just toxic.
Ps. Im referring to the "love interests" as guys bc I literally see them as guys
So follow me so we cry together this summer 😍😍 yay 😝
#free tarot#pac reading#pick a card reading#pick a picture#pick a pile#tarot reading#free card reading#pick a card#tarotonline#free tarot readings
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Level 32
Oh my gosh I didn’t think I was going to ever finish this! My week has been insane! Hope you guys are all doing well, enjoy the update :)
Tagging: @loudartanimeeclipse, @ihavenotfallenyet
Master List Here
Happy Reading Honey Bees! <3
Level 32
It had been a productive couple of weeks, excited over the recent developments you took off for home, hoping Edo would be online. Your research was going well, but you’d managed to have an intelligent conversation with the super cute doctor at work, and you had to tell someone. Sure, Edo was one hundred percent not going to enjoy the gossip, but you were sure he’d listen or at least pretend to.
With your game console turned on, you put in an order for a pizza and made your way to the couch to get comfortable. Not even five minutes had gone by before you got a rush of notifications on your phone, all thanking you for signing up for the partner’s battle tournament that was happening tomorrow. Confused and concerned, you stared at your phone, wondering if there had been a glitch, or worse, someone you were trying to avoid has signed up and listed you as their partner without saying anything.
Crap.
You couldn’t log on faster, the moment the game loaded you dove into your game’s notifications looking for clues on who could have possibly signed you up. Then your controller vibrated off of your lap.
EdoPorcupine5661 → Hope you’re free tomorrow. If not we’ll find a time to destroy my meddling friends… Well that may solve one mystery ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → There’s more than one? Yes actually. First question ← WildCyt0m3try What meddling friend do I need to thank with a smack? ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → OneEyedDrag0n, turned around for five minutes… Sounds like a wonderfully chaotic friend you’ve got ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → That’s one way to put it. Next Question! What were you going to do if I wasn’t free???? ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Forfeit? That would have been the only option….any other questions… What’s our plan? ← WildCyt0m3try
For the better part of three hours, you and Edo put together a strategy that would hopefully cover all your bases. Not that you could predict what every other player was going to do, but you had the advantage of understanding what the major contenders were going to do, which would hopefully give you both a leg up in the tournament. It wasn’t until you had logged off and were crawling into bed that you realized you’d been so concentrated on purchasing new equipment and salves, telling Edo about your week had utterly slipped your mind. Oh well, maybe you’d be able to slip it in tomorrow.
When your alarm went off the next morning, your first thoughts were those of confusion. You didn’t have to go into work, did you? Aggravated, you smacked at your phone until the noise stopped, and you rolled yourself right back over in bed. It wasn’t until your eyes were closed, and you were nearly asleep again that you remembered you had a tournament to attend. Thanking the gods you didn’t have to be anywhere physically, you shot out of bed and ran down the stairs to turn on your console. While you are waiting for the login screen to pop up, you scrounge around your kitchen, looking for anything that would suffice for a decent breakfast. Finally, settling on a comically tall glass of chocolate milk and a bowl of your favorite cereal, you settled onto the couch and readied for battle.
EdoPorcupine5661 → I was beginning to wonder if you’d show. IM NOT THAT LATE OMG! ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Oversleep? Coffee? Boyfriend? First off, good morning to you too sunshine ← WildCyt0m3try Secondly, I’m not late, so even if I did oversleep we’re good ← WildCyt0m3try Third of all. I DON’T HAVE A BOYFRIEND. ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → So you asked, and he got mad and ditched? Has anyone ever told you how pessimistic you are? ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → All the time. What about it? As long as you know lol ← WildCyt0m3try I’ll have you know, he said he knew we weren’t exclusive. ← WildCyt0m3try Said with how long it took for me to agree even to date he knew better ← WildCyt0m3try Then proceed to decide how much free time I was going to have based on work commitments ← WildCyt0m3try I forgot my chill pills that day so yanno...haven’t spoken to him in a hot minute ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → sounds like you What’s that supposed to me? ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → That you didn’t deviate from my perceived opinions about your character That literally sounds worse… ← WildCty0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → It isn’t, I just complimented you Pffff, if you say so ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → I do. Now let’s get ready. Roger that best friend ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Stop No, you deserved that ← WildCyt0m3try Also, I mean it <3 ← WildCyt0m3try Now let’s kick some digital ass! I want that prize!! ← WildCyt0m3try
The tournament bracket was released early that morning. Your first battle wasn’t until round three based on their tiering system, and for that, you were grateful. Sure Edo had already come up with a pretty solid plan, but it was nice to see who you could potentially be facing. Fortunately, you knew OneEyedDrag0n wasn’t participating today, so you didn’t have to worry about being surprised by a wayward ax again. The plan was to trick people into being overly confident for as long as possible since Bow Knight and a Pegasis Knight didn’t look like a problematic duo to overcome. That’s why this was going to be fun.
After hours of competition, it boiled down to the final round. You weren’t sure if you were excited or terrified of this. Everything had gone according to plan; you had managed to keep the extensive and unexpected arsenal of weapons and magic hidden just long enough to get you through the less challenging rounds. If everything went the way you had expected it to, the two would be facing off against Kenshin and Sasuke, a formidable duo.
EdoPorcupine5661 → Ready? I think so? ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Not good enough, you’re either ready, or you’re not. I’m ready then ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Good
When the controller vibrated, signaling the start of the battle, you sucked in a breath. Part of the tournament was about getting around the map and collecting specific items. Navigating the map was easy enough with Edo a mounted unit and yourself a flier, but you didn’t want to get too cocky. Sasuke had picked up the lockpicking skill in his previous class, meaning he’d take any treasure he could get to without fail or need for a key, and Kensin’s unit had enough brute strength if your dexterity faltered once you were a goner.
The idea was to split up and take any treasure in your immediate area, once those were in hand the both of you would mount a generally weak attack on Kenshin. Sasuke would hopefully round back after completing the collection mission, which is when Edo planned to break off and corner him—leaving you to deal with Kenshin by yourself until Edo could take out Sasuke. The entire plan hinged on Sasuke being sent to open all the treasure chests and Kenshin being too excited to fight either of you.
Fortunately, it seemed to be working. Your fingers furiously tapped at buttons, trying to will the game into cooperating with your skillful button mash. It didn’t have to be pretty right now; it just had to be a useful distraction. When Kenshin finally landed a hit, you sucked in a breath; quickly, you ran the scenario. You were stuck between healing yourself or bet on your stats and take another crack at Kenshin.
Decision made, you closed your eyes and held your breath, hoping your lance would activate its ability. You didn’t want to look, having decided you’d keep your eyes closed until the next turn you waited. It wasn’t until your phone started vibrating off the hook you thought to look around. Kenshin’s avatar was no longer visible on your screen, and the more you looked, the more you realized that nobody’s stats were available anymore.
Oh gods, had your wifi crashed in the middle of the tournament? Panic rose in your chest, but it was shut down quickly when WINNER flashed across the screen in bold. What? That couldn’t be, right?
EdoPorcupine5661 → Well done Thanks? I honestly don’t know what happened though ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → I hit him with a long-range bow skill, and you delivered a critical hit Oh, really? ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Don’t believe me? Not really. ← WildCyt0m3try I’m convinced this is a fever dream ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Who’s the pessimist now? Still you ← WildCyt0m3try It will always be you lol ← WildCty0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Whatever EdoPorcupine5661 → Don’t forget to accept the prize money I wont ← WildCyt0m3try This was fun. It’s been a good week ← WildCyt0m3ty EdoPorcupine5661 → I guess it has EdoPorcupine5661 → I’m getting off now Same, enjoy your evening! ← WildCyt0m3try Eat something fun to celebrate :) ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Sure EdoPorcupine5661 → you too I guess…. Awe, you do care!! ← WildCyt0m3try EdoPorcupine5661 → Whatever
#ikesen#ikemen sengoku#ikesen ieyasu#ikesen reader insert#ikesen afk#ikesen gamer au#ikesen modern au#ikesen self insert#i don't feel like tagging today
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Holy Drummer: Chapter 4
Full story on ao3
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Summary: Facing religion, sexuality, and music is not what Alex sighed up for when his parents convinced him to help out those who were far from God. Can he handle his two newest challenges named Reggie and Luke?
Chapter 4: Do You Think He Likes Guys?
Sara looked at her brother who was pacing around her room, he kept going to talk and then stopping before second-guessing himself and pacing some more.
“Lexi, you’re making me dizzy!” Sara yelled and Alex stopped falling back on her bed next to her looking over at her with guilty blue eyes. “What’s wrong with you Lexi, you never act like this unless something is really bothering you?” Sara asked and Alex sat up looking his sister in the eyes breathing in and letting it out.
“Reggie and Luke invited me to be in their band,” Alex said and Sara sat up too excited.
“That’s awesome Lexi, why are you so bummed?” Sara asked, shaking his shoulders smiling at him widely.
“You know that mom and dad will kill me if I even think about joining because of church,” Alex said sighing. He really wanted to be in the band.
“If you tell mom and dad that it’s to keep an eye on them then maybe they’ll reconsider, ask in the morning though, it’s almost ten o’clock,” Sara said pointing to the clock on her wall. Alex smiled hugging his sister goodnight before waking his way back to his room and falling back on his bed falling into a deep sleep.
Caroline Joyner sat at the table looking at her kids stuffing breakfast in their mouths quickly before having to go to school. Alex seemed a bit more cautious which made Caroline suspicious.
“Mom, dad, Reggie and Luke are in a band so that means that they might have time alone together, do you think that I could join the band to keep an eye on them?” Alex asked hopefully and Caroline and Phillip looked at each other for a moment before nodding.
“That would probably be for the best sweetie, now you and Sara better be off to school, we don’t want you two being late now do we?” Caroline asked and the two blondes jumped up running out of the house backpacks in hand to Sara’s convertible.
Luke woke up early running to Bobby’s garage to start writing a song and was shocked to see that Reggie was already there with clothes laid out for that day still asleep on the couch. Luke grabbed Reggie’s shoulders shaking him to wake him up.
“Luke?” Reggie asked looking up at Luke who smiled down at him.
“I have a new song I’m working on for when Alex joins the band,” Luke said and Reggie gave him a look.
“If he joins the band, you never know what his parents are going to say.” Luke rolled his eyes at Reggie’s pessimistic behavior.
“Do you want to hear what I have so far or not?” Luke asked, getting a nod and laugh from Reggie. “Ok.” Luke started playing a riff on his guitar before starting to sing. “Give me a minute, gotta catch my breath, cause looking at him makes me such a mess. You have to understand, where I come from, I can’t just look I gotta reach out and touch ‘im. No Mr. Perfect but he’s worth it, God forgive me for my obsession.” Luke was unsure of where the ending was going but the first verse was good.
“It sounds great Luke!” Reggie said getting up to hug him and he grabbed his bass going to play some notes that could fit in with the song. “What do you think of this?” Reggie asked strumming in tempo with the part Luke struggled with. “Blonde hair, blue eyes, do you think he likes guys?” Reggie sang making Luke laugh. Bobby walked out into his garage dressed and ready for school.
“What are you two doing out here?” Bobby asked, looking at the two who put their instruments down still smiling.
“We were writing a song, come on Bobby it’s time to get to school,” Reggie said, trying to put Bobby’s mind at ease while shucking a shirt over his head and putting his jacket on.
The three boys arrived at the school and saw Alex and Sara getting out of a convertible having what looked like a serious conversation. Bobby pushed his hair back and walked over to the car with Reggie and Luke following him.
“Hey Sara, I thought we were supposed to meet up last night to talk about the science project,” Bobby said, and being a whole grade level above Reggie and Luke gave him the right to talk to the prettiest senior even if she was Alex’s sister.
“I was busy, sorry about that.” Sara looked back to her brother with wide eyes and nudged her head in the band’s direction.
“Oh yeah, I thought about the offer and talked to my parents, they’re cool with me joining the band,” Alex said, talking to Luke and Reggie.
“You invited him to join the band?” Bobby asked upset because he wasn’t asked.
“Bobby, I know you're pissed but he plays the drums and his voice is killer, if you were there yesterday then you would have asked him too,” Luke said and Bobby sighed.
“Are you sure it’s not cause he’s…” Reggie jumped on Bobby’s back putting his hand over the older’s mouth knocking him to the ground and Sara looked over her car door checking to see if Bobby was ok.
“I’ll see you guys next Sunday, hopefully not sooner,” Sara said, bumping shoulders with Luke passing him a piece of paper with a note that said: Don’t read until later. Alex looked at them uncomfortably for a second before getting out of the car too.
“Don’t forget we have a meeting in the library later,” Alex said walking off into the school.
Bobby got let up by the boys dusting himself off.
“Not that it’s my business or anything but you two totally have a crush on him,” Bobby said and Luke glared at him.
“Yeah, none of your business Bobby, go back to flirting with Sara, I’m sure that will go really well,” Luke said gesturing for Reggie to follow him to class and Reggie silently apologized to Bobby not wanting to piss Luke off or leave Bobby mad at them.
Alex ran to catch up with his sister.
“So you and Bobby huh?” Alex asked, nudging his sister who looked at him with icy daggers. “Ok, that’s a no,” Alex added looking away.
“Get to class Lexi and have fun with the boys after school,” she said, winking taking a complete 180 from her previous attitude. Sara was like his best friend, she knew what he wanted before he even did but she was also his sister and she knew what was best for him, Sara was not going to let her brother be disappointed.
Luke looked at the note that Sara had given him, there was neat scrawl on the page.
You two better know what you’re doing and the pressure that you’re about to put on my brother to inevitably choose our parents or you two. Please don’t make this harder on Lexi Alex than it already is. Wait before you tell him your feelings, I know you have them. I heard you at church so be patient with him and if you need help wooing him when the time comes, I’ll be there to help. Alex deserves greatness and if you two are going to give that to him then who am I to stop you?
-Sara
Luke looked at the note in shock, she had figured them out so quickly but that didn’t matter. Luke had a meeting to get to but first, he had to show Reggie the letter otherwise the bassist would be all over Alex.
Reggie had a similar reaction to Luke but then narrowed it down to siblings know when the other one is desirable to someone. He started telling a detailed story about his sister Marla had a boy following her around at school and then asked to be her seat partner on the bus, which was the formation of a terrible elementary school relationship. They arrived at the study room as Reggie finished the story and saw Alex reading through a book chewing on the end of a hoodie string.
“Uh, we’re here,” Reggie said knocking on the side of the door making Alex look up and drop the string from his mouth.
Luke got to take in how pink was a great color on Alex and didn’t really pay attention to Alex trying to pitch a deal until Alex snapped in his face.
“Pay attention,” Alex said blushing, noticing how Luke zoned out looking at his face. “I’m willing to say that this meeting went well and that I joined your band to make sure that you weren’t like going back to being gay, even though I’m pretty sure you can’t change a gender preference, I don’t have a problem with you guys liking each other, it’s 1994 you should be able to be with whoever you want and long as you’re being safe or whatever.” Reggie and Luke’s mouths hung open at the fact that Alex was going to let them be together so easily.
“Is there a catch or something?” Luke asked, grabbing Alex’s hand from across the table.
“Yeah, you can’t get caught so you have to promise me that there will be no more sleepovers or kissing and stuff where you can get caught, just be careful so I don’t get yelled at or beaten up by my dad,” Alex said playing with the end of his hoodie string again and Reggie’s eyes flashed with hurt knowing what it was like to get punched by someone you love.
“Yeah, no problem ‘Lex,” Reggie said and Alex looked up, face turning pink again. “What? You’re not falling for us are you?” Reggie said teasingly.
“No, no, it’s just my sister calls me that,” Alex said and Reggie smiled.
“Well, I wouldn't want to turn you off, pretty young thing,” Reggie said scooting closer from across the table to Alex whose face was now bright red as he got up from his seat.
“Don’t do that again,” Alex said, walking out of the room his face still burning.
“No problem sweet cheeks!” Reggie called out after him and all he got was the middle finger as Alex walked out of the empty library and to his sister’s car. She had gone out with some friends and decided to leave him the key so he could get home.
Alex sat in the car banging his head against the wheel a couple of times before regaining his composure and starting the car.
“I can’t actually be falling for these two idiots,” Alex said trying to reassure himself but found himself daydreaming of Luke’s warm smile and Reggie’s laugh that night as he tried to fall asleep that night.
The second Alex left the library, Luke hit Reggie upside the head as the bassist just laughed.
“What, he likes us, I can tell,” Reggie said leaning into Luke.
“I hope he does otherwise, that offer that he just made us, is off the table for good Reggie and then we’ll get converted into a catholic club, I don’t think either of us want that,” Luke said trying to make sure that Reggie got the picture.
“I get it Luke, I want to be with you too but we have to get Alex to like us like that cause ever since Sunday, it’s felt like a piece of us has been missing,” Reggie said and Luke nodded in understanding.
“I get what you mean Reg, but we have to be patient like Sara said, I have a feeling that in the future we’re going to need her help,” Luke said and the two go up starting their walk home with connected pinkies at five pm making back to their street at five-thirty and parting ways sadly without a kiss thanks to Alex’s dumb rules of no PDA where they can be seen easily.
“I love you Luke,” Reggie said letting Luke walk back to his own house just to hear the whisper of “I love you too” that made everything they were doing worth it.
#sunset curve#crossposted on ao3#luke patterson#alex x luke#Luke Patterson (Julie and the Phantoms)#alex's parents#alex x reggie#Alex (Julie and the Phantoms)#alex (jatp)#sara joyner#oc#bobby wilson#bobby x oc#Reggie (Julie and the Phantoms)#reggie's parents#reggie (jatp)#this is the equivalent of me shoving dolls faces together and saying now kiss#religious au
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Im going to explain my personality so you can confirm or deny if im an infp 5w6. Firstly I do relate to 5s fear of being useless and incapable. I dont go out of my way to help anyone, but if someone wants me to help them, I will try to do what I can or give them advice. If im not able to help them I say something obvious/vague so it still looks like I know what im talking about. I really hate looking stupid or feeling inferior to anyone. I also hate feeling powerless.[1/8]
I feel so pathetic when I cant do anything to influence something in certain situations. I relate to 7s fear too. I hate feeling any type of negative emotion and I just want to enjoy myself and have fun. I care very much about satisfying my own desires just so I can feel better and not feel like im forcing anything on myself or doing anything unwillingly. I also hate feeling like someone is controlling me or has any power over me. I love having freedom to do whatever I feel like doing.[2/8]
Restrictions make me angry. Im an observant person and im not great at talking to people or forming any type of relationships with anyone. Its hard for me to find people I can get along with. Im opinionated and I love sharing my perspective on things with everyone to see what they think. I enjoy making people not able to counter my points. It usually means I have evolved my way of thinking or the person wasnt very smart. Im surprisingly good at manipulating people without even realizing it.[3/8]
Im extremely suspicious of people so it takes me years to trust anyone. Ive been considered selfish by many people but I think its because theres no way I can possibly understand anyone besides myself. Isnt it pointless and rude to make assumptions about someone? And I would rather not risk being wrong. I am great at predicting what someone will do. With people im close with or have a good understanding of them, I know exactly what they will say and what their next actions will be.[4/8]
Im usually never wrong about this. I am confident in myself and I am aware of my limits. I am not afraid to confront someone if I feel like I need to to feel satisfied. I am mainly concerned about how something will benefit me or how I feel rather than how others feel. I can easily come up with a bunch of ideas or solutions in most situations. When I think of solutions I have no problem considering everything detail to find a perfect solution or offer multiple if there is nothing ideal.[5/8]
Im a quiet person. I am very competitive when I care about something. Winning is always important to me. I am very pessimistic because I hate disappointing myself. Id rather be surprised than disappointed. I like when things are less organized because of how interesting things can get. If I say something, Im obviously confident in the trueness of it so when someone says I am wrong I get confused/offended and panic until I can convince them I was actually right.[6/8]
If im wrong about something I start to question what is actually true and doubt ability to be correct. I am prideful so I hate having to accept being wrong. I seem uncaring to a lot of people but sometimes I do actually care, im just not very expressive of those feelings. I am very defensive of myself. If someone even touches me I am instantly ready to attack whoever it was, I usually dont, I prepare just in case. You never know what can happen.[7/8]
I can be very dramatic/panic if I feel completely hopeless which isnt very often but often enough to mention. To avoid overthinking, im impulsive when I make decisions or do something. Thinking just wastes time in some situations. I am considerate of people I care about. Im not afraid of negative things happening because they havent happened yet so why would I be worrying about it. This is a lot so I'm going to end it here. Hopefully I included all of the relevant information about myself.[8/8]
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Hi,
You sound like neither an INFP nor a 5 and I think you’re an ExTP 7. There is also a decent amount of contradiction in here, which may be situational but might be a sign that you need some more time to get a better understanding of your own personality (as many people do - if you’re in your teens or have low/no Fi, this is very normal).
To start off, you mention that you relate to 7 as well, and you provide considerably more evidence in favor of that - avoiding negative emotion, indulging in your desires, impulsivity, and so forth. 5 is really not indulgent nor avoidant of negative emotions, and 5s as a rule aren’t particularly good with people or manipulation either as they will almost always rather withdraw from the situation. 7′s core fear is to be trapped or deprived and unable to do what they want, and that sounds by far the most accurate. My guess is 7w8 here, and possibly with an 8 fix as well.
There is really nothing that looks like high Fi in this, to be honest. Ti is the function that tends to be motivated and excited by making other people unable to counter their points. High Ti users tend to enjoy arguments for arguments sake (vs. for a specific goal) and Ti-Fe users tend to be more interested in getting everyone’s perspective than Fi-Te users. Fi-doms are also typically not very good at manipulation; when unhealthy they tend to get invested in authenticity and thinking everyone else is fake but they don’t really need the approval of others in the same way, so there’s not that same motivation to manipulate in the first place. On a more positive note, Ti users do like problem-solving and tend to take pride in that ability.
You mentioned you’re a quiet person, but so much of this question is about interacting with other people, being somewhat confrontational, and being impulsive. Overall I think there is very prominent extroverted perceiving and better Fe than Si displayed here - the overall style seems very extroverted to me.
I could go with either Se or Ne as a lot of this was general extroverted perceiving; both can be pretty good at predicting things since Se tends to pick up on many tiny details (ESxPs are among the best at reading people) and Ne tends to think of so many possibilities that the right one is often among them; both often can come up with multiple solutions, and so on. There’s nothing that specifically points to one or the other here for me (and they can be hard to tell apart) so I’d consider your spatial awareness/reasoning and your thought processes in terms of abstract/concrete.
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Episode 12: “I’ve been awakened.” - Xavier
Well that vote went exactly how I had hoped it would... and then the super idol came out! I'm glad that it's out of the game now once and for all, but I guarantee that Liv is going to find something else along the way. It's so hard for me to summarize everything that I'm doing around here because I feel like I'm doing a lot. Maybe that's going to come bite me in the ass this coming vote but idk, I'm not mad about it. I definitely limited myself a lot by really not going for the money shot and convincing Jeff to use his vote steal on Joey to get Joey the hell out of here, but maybe in some weird way it works. Because now I have John's 8 chips and I'm going to need as many as I can get to somehow beat Livingston. I definitely think that snubbing this vote is going to be my biggest detriment only bc it provides the opportunity for Livingston to ascend higher as a threat, but also avoid getting voted out at our next convenience. I still really want Kailyn to go, but I think the goal for everyone else is to get rid of Livingston or myself (maybe Joey) at the next tribal council. Ugh. Heh... I never would've thought that I could pull off that kind of a move and have it not fully work out in my favor. It was a cool feeling regardless and I'm not crushed if it means I played myself out of the game. I give myself credit where it's due, I'm going to continue fighting as always and hopefully I come out on top :~)
Last Luxor standing
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Whelp, there goes the Super Idol. Jaiden is a snakey little snake snake. Pat and Jeff are naïve as all hell. I'm not 100% sure I believe Jaiden now, but apparently Joey's plan was to cut me at like final 6 or something. And people are so convinced that Livingston and I are a duo. I mean we are, but like maybe if anyone would ACTUALLY FUCKING TALK TO ME AND TRY TO WORK WITH ME, we wouldn't be??? Like don't whine and bitch that Livingston and I are a duo who are going to stick together and not turn against each other if you can't even be bothered to respond to a single fucking message of mine. I have no issues voting out whoever is necessary for me to get farther in the game. But when only a limited number of people express in interest in going farther with me? You better fucking bet I'm working with those people. Anyways, can't wait to vote out Jaiden, Kailyn and Xavier. xoxo Gossip Girl
Waiting on Immunity Results, but whatever happens the 5 of us need to vote together, and be smart about it! We know that liv, Keegan and Joey will vote together. Probably for me next. So Jeff Pat need to stick with us. We need to split the votes 3-2, and use a vote steal, cancel or extra to get it to 3-3 just in case of idols. We need to be smart about this. Going all out and proposing this once results are in. I am going to the Jury next anyway, go out guns blazing.
...five seconds later
OMG I WON IMMUNITY! Finally something good! I figured most people gave their correct numbers, and if not, just chose a number close to theirs. OR they didn't coordinate so well, so some gave a higher number and others gave a lower one, so it cancelled out. Also helps that I knew Liv and Pat's numbers with the advantage. Pat gave mine accidentally so I knew his was in the 40s as well. Phew. Now to figure out whether to use the Steal a Vote now or not.
I came so close to winning immunity but it was rudely snatched away from me by Xavier. On the plus side, Livingston found the hidden immunity idol on the idol board! Heck yeah! As long as there isn’t a full blindside we should be good now!
(originally written 11/23, night after super idol) Anyways what rly bugs me is that Jeff is actually mad at me now for the fact that he wasted his vote on Joey and I tried to get rid of Livingston instead... and I think I put myself into a spot where I need to apologize to him and make him feel good about me again. Tbh no I don’t. Jeff said to me that he’s got to play his own game first and mine second. So why am I playing some other people’s games first? Because it benefits me to play everyone’s hand for them, yes, but also I’ve been caught trying to run the entire table a little too early. So maybe now it’s time for me to do something a little different - play my game first. It’s now fully Jeff’s fault that Joey didn’t leave. I told Jeff precisely what he needed to do to ensure Joey went home. He needed to play the vote steal and send Joey on packing... and he didn’t. So now when Pat and I finally talk tomorrow and he tells me what’s up, I’m not gonna hold back. I’m going to throw Jeff under that bus so fucking hard his head will spin. Pat doesn’t know about the vote steal and I think I’ll hold that piece of information over Jeff’s head a little bit longer - I know something no one else knows about you, keep me safe or it’s coming out and everyone’s going to come after you. So tomorrow I will blame Jeff to Pat. Sure I was the person who made the move, but it’s my game and I’m playing it now. If Pat doesn’t like my apology, then kiss my ass and take eighth place. Bye!
...five seconds later
I'm pessimistic as FUCK so I'm fully expecting to go home tonight and I'm writing this confessional against better judgment because I need to rly focus on letting my mental state get back to normal rather than Survivor mode before I get voted out lmfao. Anyways, tonight is FINALLY the night where I'm making my last move against Joey, one way or another. This is the decision that will either determine oops sorry as I was writing that, I just realized something else... this is ME making yet another move that makes Jeff think I'm controlling the whole entire game I love that for me hehe. Should I convince the entire tribe to vote out Jeff instead??? Let's go fully with the chaos mode. DRAW ROCKS BITCHES!!!! Jk Jk Back to my original point - this is the vote that determines whether I was worth being brought back for this game or not. I'm not trying to be this like crazy strategist who has all these cracked plans to take out Joey but that's where we're at rn. One side of me like, trusts Jeff but the other side of me doesn't. So I told Jeff about Joey's legacy advantage and now it's like, getting Jeff to want to turn on Joey. Even though Joey told me he wanted to get rid of Jeff it seems like Jeff is not as stressed about it. I'm pretty sure Jeff turned votes against me instead, it is what it is. It's the game. However, Jeff would be really stupid to not vote out Joey now while he has the chance... it's probably going to come down to Jeff winning this whole entire thing if he makes the correct move tonight because I'm certainly not going to turn my back on him if he follows through. But, crazy things have happened tonight. And it's about to get a whole lot crazier. :) Although I'm like, CERTAIN I'm going home tonight or at least getting votes. OK IM TRYING SO HARD TO WRITE THIS CONFESSIONAL BUT SO MUCH IS HAPPENING AHHHH IM STRESSING OUT BUT I KNOW THERES A GOOD PLAN OUT THERE FOR ME TO MAKE AND HOPEFULLY IM NOT SCREWING MYSELF OVER
...five seconds later
OKAY I think I'm gonna be ok but I'm taking a HUGE risk rn!!! Basically putting my vote onto Liv with Joey and hoping Joey 1) doesnt have an idol and 2) gets the rest of the votes. But my logic for voting Liv is simple. If Joey actually has an idol he's been hiding, he plays it and reveals I voted for him again if I don't do it. It also prevents me/Kailyn from going home 2-1-0 since Keegan and Liv seem to be locked in on one of us (likely me). If somehow Jeff/Pat are lying and are part of split, it'll go 2-2-2-2 which is not only insane but it also gives me a PERFECT platform to light people up, namely Jeff and his vote steal advantage. But we'll see! I'm predicting to go home tonight :) But at least I made a move when I could. Good luck to me <3
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leigh-anne pinnock. cisfemale. she/her. / billie prescott just pulled up blasting girls need love by summer walker — that song is so them ! you know, for a(n) twenty-four year old singer, i’ve heard they’re really pessimistic, but that they make up for it by being so audacious. if i had to choose three things to describe them, i’d probably say small forgotten & meaningless tattoos, patron filled shot glasses, and texts left on read . here’s to hoping they don’t cause too much trouble ! ( it’s me raq im sorry u have to see 4 muses from me )
it’s raq, hows it going ? this is billie, she’s alot but so am i so it tracks. hopefully that weird new muse phase goes over smoothly because ,,, i love her already. uhh i’ve gotta add her to my plot list but ! i’ll try to list some below. hmu for plots as usual and,, yUH! here we go ( side note i am watching insidious while doing this so if it doesn’t make sense, you know why ) yes i made her from texas no i don’t regret that decision.
divorce tw, and yeahhhh stay safe ! i think that’s it.
[ 𝕓𝕒𝕤𝕚𝕔𝕤 ]
full name: billie nadia prescott
age: twenty-three years old
date of birth: december 24th
star sign: capricorn
place of birth: dallas , texas
currently living in: los angeles , california
sexual orientation: pansexual
TL;DR : her parents were divorced, which sent her into a crazy phase of running away and not trusting anyone around her. her father gave up on her, she hates her mother -- her grandfather billy is the only person who seemed to continue to care and support her . she’s still quite untrusting, her best defense mechanism being sarcasm and a little bit of coldness. she’s not the best lover cause she doesn’t believe in all that but she is a rather loyal friend. if you know any of my older muses she’s,,, a margo lite. margo with some goals and direction .
[ 𝕓𝕒𝕔𝕜𝕘𝕣𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕕 ]
nicholas prescott and elise masters were on their way to martial bliss. expecting their first child, happily engaged, moving into their first home together. everything in their lives seem to have fallen right into place. and to make matters even better , their first daughter -- billie prescott would be born on christmas eve. an early christmas present, like the perfect bow to neatly tie up their perfect lives. named after nick’s father, billy prescot . billie was their pride and joy. married a year after , elise and nick’s lives couldn’t be better.
billie grew into loving dance and music at a very young age. around five she’d take dance and singing lessons and ( despite, probably hardly being able to afford it all ) her parents really wanted to push her to do great things with her talents. they even put her in a critically acclaimed fine arts school. but themselves in quite a bit of debt, but it was worth it to try to distract her from everything else going on in their lives.
no one expected infidelity to break apart the perfect prescott family. it’d been going on for months -- elise’s coming and going, slowly but surely falling in love with another man. timing has never been their greatest ally. the day before billie’s twelfth birthday ( december 23, 2009 ) their family officially broke apart. finding out elise was pregnant with another man’s child, nick packed up his bags and moved in with his father billy.
christmas eve and day would never be the same for billie. her father gained sole custody after the divorce. her relationship with her mother & step father was never good -- billie, not really wanting to spend any time with either of her parents. her life is pretty much in turmoil, running away from home for days on end ( or until a friend’s parent ratted her out). at this point of her life things at school also got worse, she nearly gave up dance. the divorce of her parents really hard on her. to add, she’d also been getting bullied at her fine arts school. she looked different, dressed different, wasn’t as wealthy as the other girls at her school. she was picked on incessantly making her want to get as far away from her school as she could. essentially, this phase in her life is the worse it’s ever been and a time she likes to pretend didn’t happen.
luckily she didn’t quit the school, her grandfather is to credit for pushing her to continue as her father lost a lot of patience for the young girl thanks to her behavior. a few years later, in 2011, she’d land the opportunity of a lifetime. scouted at one of her performances, billie was offered a chance to join a girl group. maybe more attracted to the chance of moving to los angles at such a young age and getting away from the visits to her mother’s house , she accepted ! and the rest is pretty much history. she’d meet her closest friends and finally get a taste of what she’s always wanted -- her independence away from it all.
[ 𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕤𝕠𝕟𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕪 ]
disciplined, smart, self - reliant, pessimistic ( quite literally always expecting the worse ), a know it all, ambitious, a bit of a workaholic, adventurous,
prettyyy self loathing but really hides it kinda well with a facade of grandiose. but upon meeting her it’s pretty obvious she doesn’t believe that.
just,,,, so sarcastic lmao has zero good coping skills . none. so if it’s not backhanded sarcasm she’ll probably resort to ... substances. hollywood hasn’t been kind to her so she’s kinda been exposed to some bad influences at a very young age. she’s trying her best eye,,,
she’s despite being really stubborn , she’s pretty forgiving.
loves to dance! she’s professionally trained in ballet , tap, and a few other styles. she does that in her free time when she isn’t working on the band as well as a very small soundcloud gig under a fake name that she keeps underwraps * subject to change lmao
i think that’s it. she’s just chaotic and i’m still figuring her out !
[ 𝕨𝕒𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕕 𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕟𝕖𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟𝕤 ]
more friends outside of the band. a few ! i don’t see her being uber close to a ton of people outside of her band. but i imagine she’s also go a few casual friends who she hangs with. party friends! even worse influences! good influences! people she’s terribly influencing. we love to see it!!
someone new to the industry that mayb she’s a bit protective over??
an ex or two? she’s not,, /really/ the type to date alot lmaoooo so i imagine she’s got a few exes who are likely on bad terms. maybe one that’s on good terms. such good terms they forget they were even together at one point lmao
casual flings! relationships that never made it anywhere because she sells herself too short and probably never thought the other could actually love her seriously if they ever got to know her
. anything and everything pls :)
#excess:intro#this is v v v bad#i'll b better in writing her this is just#me throwing ideas and seing what sticks
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&&. ( alexander barrett ) was just spotted in amsterdam. rumor has it ( he ) is a ( 34 ) year old ( alpha werewolf ) who resembles ( jamie dornan ). ( he ) has been said to be ( quick-witted & determined ) but also quite ( cunning & hard-headed ). with all the chaos surrounding the magical underworld, ( he ) has chosen to align with ( the werewolf rebellion ). ( he ) is currently serving as ( a werewolf rebel spy in the inferno ). hopefully the city doesn’t devour them whole.
— ❝ fine. make me your villain. ❞
( hi there, kiwi here! last but not least, we have the official intro for my angsty edgelord, alexander barrett. daddy issues and brooding galore, this is a character who is exceptionally near and dear to my heart. as per usual, please let me know if you’d like to plot; i’m available through both the group’s discord and tumblr ims. ♡ )
name: alexander henryk barrett
birthplace: the bronx, new york, u.s.a.
birthday: may 3rd | taurus
scent: bergamot, violet flower, tuscan iris, campfire, black pepper oil, warm woods + ( signature cologne: noir - tom ford )
appearance: 6′3″ and muscular from years of working as a skilled hunter and undercover member of the werewolf resistance. with curly chestnut / honey brown hair and piercing blue eyes, he strongly reflects his irish heritage. alex prefers to keep a full beard at all time, just as a personal preference.
personality: ( + ) quick-witted, determined, intelligent, crafty, ambitious ( - ) cunning, hard-headed, hot-tempered, sly, self-serving
biography: In the heart of the Bronx, a boy was born to a starry-eyed single mother who wanted her son to be better than the world he’d entered into.
Financial instability and strife reigned over young Alexander Barrett’s life; poverty and crushing responsibilities became the weight he was forced to bear. Never truly exposed to anything but life in the projects, Alex spent most of his younger childhood years roughing around with some of the neighborhood kids and dreaming of a day when they’d all make it in the big leagues; some of his friends aspired to excel in sports, while others prayed to God that they could keep their asses in school long enough to earn degrees and get solid jobs in the more middle-class areas of the Bronx or even, God willing, another one of New York City’s heavily-populated, compact boroughs. But Alexander, with a mother who was barely able to scrape up enough money to get by for the two of them in their closet of an apartment with two weekday jobs and an additional one on the weekend, knew that getting out of the city and onto making a decent income was less than realistic. See, Alex was different from the other neighborhood kids; his mother was a runaway--an omega werewolf refugee who had escaped Ireland after she had been sold to an alpha werewolf from her pack in the hopes of reproducing and “fulfilling” her duties as an omega. After being impregnated with the alpha noble’s child, she escaped on a refugee boat leading to the Americas. Her pack, being Roman Catholic, had considered their union as concrete as marriage--and the only way Genevieve could escape her husband was through death. So she disappeared. It was there, in the heart of New York, that she raised her only son with all of the love and devotion inside of her; but, having been exiled and written off by all family and “proper” wolfish society, Genevieve found herself stranded in a foreign country as a single mother with no support, no means for a reasonable income, no resources available to her at all.
As Alex grew up under a loving, but hopelessly poor, roof, he found himself turning to the streets for some semblance of stability in a world where he feared his mother would fall under the pressure placed on her shoulders. Still, the world continued to spit on the boy from the Bronx with a hardened heart and a battered soul. And so young Alexander, pessimistic about the world around him, stumbled into a life of crime and mischief from a young age.
As soon as he was old enough to understand what poverty meant and how hard his mother–his beautiful, caring mother–worked to provide for him, Alexander decided to help her out as best as he could. As Genevieve was an Irish immigrant hiding from her past, expenses such as healthcare, as she tirelessly worked to try and obtain her American citizenship, were hard to come by. So, when Alex was too young to get a job, he’d shoplift clothes from secondhand clothing shops and would tell his mother that some of the older boys at school had traded him for it in exchange for some help on their homework; he’d snatch food from local grocery stores and would scatter it throughout their kitchen, praying to God his mom didn’t catch on. And the minute he was old enough to legally obtain a job of his own, Alex started working for one of the local car garages. First as a mechanic’s assistant, and then, finally, helping out with the cars themselves. But still, his lust for power and security–for stealing what he believed was owed to him and his mother–grew with age, and by the time he was sixteen, Alex was eaten up with the urge to control the world around him. So he hung out with kids on the wrong side of the tracks; began to make a name for himself on the streets. He made an effort not to terrorize people, but took what he thought he deserved. He was just, but stern; he was understanding, but not forgiving. He refused to let his mother become a victim of the streets, and so he made the streets his own.
So without his mother knowing, Alexander plunged into a life of crime, putting school–and his other responsibilities–on the backburner. He was raking in more cash than he ever had before, and even more so, he was making a name of himself. His mother was proud of him for all the wrong reasons; she thought her son had gained a promotion at work and was working long and tireless hours in the hopes of helping them and saving up for an education for himself. Alex, who still worshiped and adored his mother, couldn’t bear to break her heart by telling her the truth. For a long while, he told himself that things were best this way; that it was easiest and safest for Genevieve Barrett if she didn’t know who (or, more specifically, what) her only son had become. He lied, cheated, and gambled his way out of everything. He was a smooth talker, a charmer, ruthless, and ambitious as hell. If he had to lie, cheat, and steal to help his mother afford to pay rent or put food on the table, then it was something he could live with. Easily. He was an alpha werewolf who knew that the “duties” allotted to his wolf ranking and status would soon be imposed upon him--but until that day, Alex was content to use whatever resources available to him in order to get by.
While he was a teenager, roughly seventeen years old, his mother--having never committed to any sort of romantic or physical relationship with any sort of meaning since his birth--fell into a relationship with a local restaurateur named Antonio. He owned a deli shop down the street, and though he came from a humble background himself, Genevieve fell head over heels in love with the human man who made her sandwiches every other Thursday. Alex disapproved of the relationship, having never been around the man much himself, but couldn’t bear to tell his mother and risk her ending a relationship over his own discomfort. Despite the nagging sensation deep in his gut, Alex pushed aside his ill will towards his mother’s newfound love and instead channeled his energy into street fights and the small heists and coups he hosted with other neighborhood boys. It was just the general unease of his mother entering into a significant relationship when she had otherwise feared men for years that bothered Alex, that was all; that was what he continued to tell himself, at least.
Life has an uncanny ability of catching up with you, Genevieve Barrett would have said, and the words ricocheted through Alexander’s skull like a restless bullet the day his mother died. A balmy spring evening, with promises whispering through the trees, rustling their branches and whistling through the busy city streets, Alex came home after a long day of working at the mechanic’s garage when he found his mother being forced into a van, kicking and screaming as no less than five men held her down and shackled her to the back of a nondescript van. No, not men--wolves. Werewolves with strong and thick Irish accents whom Genevieve seemed to know and fear. Blood thundered through Alex’s veins and pounded in his head as he raced towards her, screaming her name as her mother’s lover stood to the side, clad in a business suit and speaking urgently with a large and imposing alpha--the leader of Genevieve’s old clan, who had been hunting her in the years since she escaped. Alex pieced things together just as the man turned to face him, a queer smile on his face that sank straight to the pit of Alex’s stomach. The man had never loved his mother--he’d been a mole. Sent by Genevieve’s former pack to retrieve one of the precious jewels that had been stolen for them: an omega.
Alex was held back and forced to watch as he and his mother locked eyes, screaming for one another and scrabbling to reach each other through the barrier that separated them. Overwhelmed by panic, Alex nearly missed what happened next. Antonio explained to the wolves that Genevieve was barren; that she’d had a surgical procedure done to keep her from bearing and rearing any more children. Already a fugitive of the clan’s law and now virtually useless to them, Alex was forced to watch as one of the men holding his mother back took her head in his hands and twisted, snapping her neck. The grief and overwhelming flood of emotions over watching his mother executed in front of him pounded through Alex’s veins, and before he was able to control himself, he was shedding his human form and emerging as an alpha wolf, attacking and killing no less than three of the other wolves who had harmed and mutilated his mother before eventually being shot with a tranquilizer. Alex viewed it as a manifestation of his grief--the lead alpha saw it for what it truly was: the physical manifestations of an alpha wolf in full bloom.
And if they couldn’t have Genevieve, they would have him.
By the time Alex woke up, he was in a cargo holding cell on his way to Ireland; deciding he was a virile alpha and would do just fine in replacement of his mother, Genevieve’s former pack had stolen Alex from his home and transported him across the pond to serve in Ireland for their unseemly purposes. Soon after arriving at their clan’s stronghold just outside of Dublin, Alex hatched a plan to escape. He might have been in a foreign country and damn near penniless, but he had grown up a street rat who clawed his way through the food chain to emerge on top, and he wasn’t about to let that stop him now. He was able to escape from the clan that hoped to transform him into a breeding alpha, making his way through Ireland in search of anything that would tie him to his mother’s name and past.
Eventually, he found fellow rogue wolves, who would later become the foundations of the burgeoning werewolf rebellion, and joined up without hesitation. He’d never had much of a thing for authority or organized government anyway. He soon took Nadya Kingsley under his wing, a fellow werewolf from a broken home who needed a cause to call her own. She has become his closest confidant in all matters; the closest thing Alex has ever had to a “best friend” or family since his mother’s untimely death. Together, the two make an unstoppable duo and have garnered the respect and admiration of much of the underground rebellion.
It’s been close to twenty years since his mother’s death, and Alex’s current assignment for the rebellion is to infiltrate The Inferno and work as an informant to gather intel on what the fallen angels and vampires have planned in the supernatural war raging against them. Alex is cold and callous, cunning, and always thinks before he acts; he can be the loyalest of friends or the bitterest of enemies.
But above all, Alexander Barrett fully trusts nothing--and no one--but himself.
wanted connections: i’d be super down for some rebellion or werewolf-human coalition connections for alex in particular ! hit me with what you’ve got !
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Episode #1: “This cast, fuck me, fuck them.” - Rhys
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Ok so my pregame thoughts. It seems like there are a lot of contenders that were threats in their original seasons just based off of placements. I’m really gonna try to use this to my advantage because in my season, I don’t think I was very threatening. Unfortunately I’ll miss the cast reveal, but I’m hoping that doesn’t put me in a bad spot. This game is gonna be tough, but I know I can do it. At least make merge. You need small goals in order to achieve bigger ones. Cast assessment coming up next :)
Y'all I am ANXIOUS! I've had a bad run recently and for the most part I never really care that much. But if I flop on this season I'll die of sadness. Okay but for real, I want to do well this season and idk what kind of people I'm going to be up against, and I couldn't even get my intro to send like i'm such a joke. Ugh y'all how can I be this stressed already.
Just roughly 2 hours before we're gonna really dive into the thick of things. There are so many things I wanna say and so many things I'm just beyond excited about. I really think this is gonna be a Top Tier Season.
I'm vowing to make the most of my stay no matter how long or short. I'm gonna try to drive the pessimist in my mind away and do my best to avoid being that early boot just because I'm a previous winner. Y'all better watch out!
This is gonna be FuCkInG LiT!!!
Getting ready for this season, I'm honored tbh. I feel like it's my first fully-legit-no-strings-attached All-Stars appearance. I was on EMBB All-Stars, but only because I was an alternate for Jake and he decided to be a host instead. Being invited back on my merits exclusively feels amazing, I just hope I can live up to my own expectations in this game and take home the win.
Hi I’m super excited to be brought back to play this game. I’m gonna play maybe a little harder but I’m hoping to keep my gameplay very similar to last season cause it did me well I just need to not freak out. I’m really looking forward to seeing who I’m playing with and I know this season will be fun.
So. This cast, fuck me, fuck them. Like they all seem so much more capable than me. Like bitch bye.
My tribe honestly idk yet. They seem cool, haven’t talked to most of them yet. So I’ll get back on that.
The only person I’m not happy is cast is Michael. Bitch hated me for no reason last season. So bitch best watch his back cause I’m bringing this hatred back this season.
Also one world can fuck off
So I am meeting everyone and honestly so far this is a nice group. A mixture of old faces like Zach and Loris and new ones like everyone else! Everybody is radical, but I am gonna try and give it a short moment before giving an assessment. Having that said, im gonna get dragged and murdered by this cast....call the police.
Hi so the game has just started and I feel like already so much has happened it has been intense. This cast? stacked. One world? intense. Me? crying.
This entire cast is so iconic and so loved I honestly don't know how to feel rn I am scared as all hell but I'm ready to fight for my fucking life. I'm also quite glad for the one world because I love the idea of being able to socialise with EVERYONE since that's such a strong point of my game for me considering I'm horrific in challenges. I just really hope I can pull things off this season and actually have someone like me and prove that I am in fact worthy of an all star title.
Being on call with people from the one world chat is honestly so fun and I can tell this is going to be a great season and we're literally only like 2.5 hours in. I really wanna make it to the end so I can experience it in it's fully glory.
amazingly, i don't think me being an admin is going to be to a problem??? i wanna thank you three beauts for giving me a wonderful tribe. i love matt, bodhi's hilarious, alyssa intimidates me but she's cute and i love allying strong women, tobi forced me to keysmash, and mo and karthik are kind of blase but its ONLY NIGHT ONE. all in all, think i can survive on this tribe. just get me to merge baby i cannot go premerge in this org if annas not gonna play then I CANT LET US DOWN
So we've officially landed in this ORG, and immediately smacked in the face with a flaccid twist that is One World. So instead of trying to balance 6 relationships I have to balance 20. I'm of course already a mess trying to keep track of it all.
Bodhi and I already have an instant F2, we'll see how that works out given we aren't even on the same tribes. Meanwhile I'm already in love with Bryce as a person and trying to possible Corral all the winners together. Obviously we need to make sure the Winners make it to merge.
I think on my tribe specifically I'm probably getting along best with Mitch, I think Rhys has a similar sense of humor as me but he went to bed too early for me to figure out more. There's a ton more sweet people on the other tribes too I just don't have time to delve into all of them, nor do I have enough substance to any of them to develop opinions anyway.
I have an idea as far as connections go for this tribe but I'm not sure yet if it is strong. Loris is sleeping though I did talk with everyone else. I have a feeling Chloe/Zach would be safest but also that Chloe/Michael might be together. Regardless I think I'll be sticking with Zach if I can help that. Drew seems nice too and Sharky seems it too. Not sure how things will go but I do have to be smart since I would be the easy choice as winner if we lose. I'm gonna be optimistic about it all though :) as for the people on other tribes I'll get to them later. This is going to be fun!
________________________________________________________________
Now that I can see the actual twist (am dummy) I have to try and make some alliances between and in the tribes. I mean making one with the winners shouldn't be too hard but I am gonna want something with a few member here and there from each. I think things are about to get much difficult because I can tell lot of these people are more familiar with each other with their histories and I am just like "hi..." so I def need to wedge myself on in there some way..I've got my work cut out for me
HI ASDDASJKLASDLJK I was so nervous but like.. I feel my victory coming.. I'm pulling my weight in the challenge I think and our tribe's pretty cool!! It's all stars.. so like.. it's no surprise that I like everyone. Sharky seems to be busy so like.. if we lose that could be a good scapegoat.. ALSO?? i was on the blog and i was like wow jones' fairy drawing is so pretty.. so i hovered over it and accidentally clicked it.. and.. i found my legacy advantage again ADSALKDKLJASKLD. and anna said to make sure you search the blog to learn about people and i didnt even see that......... im so lucky :)
So this is so exciting. I’m trying to get to know everyone. Theres one person i was effy about on my tribe and that was Jared. But he’s been talking to me and been nice. But i still have my eyes 👀 on him. Its been nice catching up with Bryce. And been talking to Mitch Rhys and Kori. I hope i can get myself in a good social position where even if im not in their alliance, that im not someone they want to take out. But this time im gunna use my bonds to my advance and hopefully it gets me to the end.
Hi i don't really know what to say right now I just know I wanted to put down some thoughts. So far I'm so fucking in love with this entire cast I'm pretty sure I've spoken to every single person in one way or another which is great, I love to see people fully invested into a season they're playing. I also really love this first challenge, although scavenger hunts stress me the fuck out because i find so many items are so hard to find, I'm just hoping my tribe can pull out a win for us and I'm sure they will cause they're all so iconic and I love them all with my whole heart already.
So I've spoken more to people thusfar and like currently I'm speaking more to people I've spoken to before which like isn't great, because i hate relying on past relations. Like i am speaking to others who are new, its just a bit awkward. So lets push by that and hopefully they aint boring af.
Well so far I've gotten a few items on my list done. Progress is slow but steady. I'm a bit worried about this tribe given it seems like all of us being on at the same time might be unlikely. (That and we're halfway through and only 2 of us have added items to our list.)
I might just be too uptight though, we'll probably be fine. I haven't gotten to talk with people today as much as I wanted as a result of balancing the other ORG and this one as well as apartment hunting and scavenging. I'm beginning to think I planned poorly and have too much on my plate at the moment...
BUT I WILL PERSEVERE! YES SIR'RE I WILL!
CAST ASSESSMENT TIMEEEE Let me start with Orfero Chris- So chris is someone who I think can either go really far as an UTR threat like he did his first season, or be an early boot. I think him and I have a similar playstyle, but he is much more poetic and structured. I am really looking forward to play with him again! We dominated in afvv and im glad he won, but I won't let that happen again. He's too good. ioris- Honestly I see ioris as more of a goat. Maybe that's false perception, but I could easily see him latching onto someone for the long haul and not being respected later on. As of now, I don't think I would work with ioris, but if the situation arises, I wont hesitate. Drew H- OK I LOVE DREW FIRST OF ALL. I am actually SUPER excited that we are finally playing a game together. I really want to work with him, but unfortunately I think he is too threatening to the point where he wont make it far. Michael- Ok so this was definitely a wildcard. I think Michael is someone to watch out for. I don't know how he'll fair in this game, knowing that people recognize his gameplay. He could either go mid merge or permerge, but I dont think he has a shot at winning. Sharky- Sharky is someone I'm unfamilar with, and for that reason alone, I am guessing he makes it deep by flying UTR while winning challenges. Zach- Zach is another sneaky player. I really would love to work with him after our relationship in emvv4 where I voted him out at f10. He is definitely not someone to brush under the rug though, because he is also very threating. I predict a mid merge boot for Zach. Clohie- I personally don't see Clohie as much of a threat, but I hope she proves me wrong. We have had limited discussion, but I can tell she is here to play. I predict she will make FTC this time, but only time will tell
Alignments: For Orfero, I can see Chris ioris and Zach on one side, Michael Drew H and Sharky on the other with Clohie in the middle
Tuatha Kori- I've been itching to play an org with kori too and im glad we are on the same tribe because i know how well he can perform in challenges. He is probably my closest ally right now, so I really hope he gets far. My prediction is early merge for him. Rhys- Rhys seems so sweet. We havent had much conversation due to timezone issues, but I'd love to work with Rhys. He is super charming and I think he can go far! My prediction for rise is late merge. Maynor- Maynor is probably the person most difficult to talk to. I have discussed with Kori and he says that his weakest relationships are with Maynor and Jared, so i think its telling that maynor might be an early boot. Jared- I think jared is super cool and he's been a player I have to watch VERY carefully. I do see myself working with him because our convos have been good so far, but I feel like he can be a good talker. We'll see how it turns out but i predict Jared being a premerge boot. He claimed to be a crackhead in confessionals though so we'll see :). Stephen Z- Man i really wish I had better conversations with him!! I think he is super cool, but he does not seem to remember who I am. If our convos improve like I hope they will, I could see Stephen going early merge. Bryce- I really like bryce too but he is soooo unpredictable and sketchy. I think his cast reveal intro shed bad light on him to other players too, but I know from experience. I see bryce being a premerge boot, but I hope he proves me wrong. I just dont feel like I can fully trust him.
Alignments: For Tuatha, I see myself aligning closely with Kori and Jared. I dont know what the dynamics would be, but I feel like Maynor is already on the outs.
Cyrena Mo- I LOVE MO SO MUCH. What a gem. I met him in TS Montenegro and he considered me one of his closest allies and saved me from elimination at f9 only for me to vote him out at f8. I still feel bad but im hoping we can mend our relationship and go far together. I actually do think he could make a deep run and definitely get to finale by laying low. Tobi- Tobi and I in games USUALLY don't end up on the same sides. That being said, I'd love to work with Tobi and I hope he makes merge unlike in emvvas. Matt- Matt is another mystery for me. On one hand, I know he is not only a host favorite but a fan favorite as well, but on the other I dont really know what he brings to the table. Another wildcard for me that I see going early merge. Jack- Jack and I have a history for sure LOL. It feels like we play every game together. I think Jack is a super nice person, and I'd love to work with him again. We dont really mesh on a personal level which makes it difficult, but I learned my lesson of trying to avoid Jack in emvvas (he got me out) Bodhi- I've seen bodhi around a bit, and can be the hero or the villain. He is quirky in a good way. I see bodhi as being the comical relief that goes mid merge for being too likeable. Alyssa- honestly alyssa seems kind of annoying. I dont want to speak too soon but i dont get good vibes from her. I think she might be an early boot on her tribe. but i truly hope im wrong about her. Karthik- I know karthik from em and i really think he could make a loyal ally. His win was well deserved but i dont necessarily think he is a threat. My predicition for him is still prejury because of his timezone. It's unpredictable when he has power and when he doesnt.
Alignments: For Cyrena, I see Mo Alyssa Tobi in one alliance and Matt Jack and Bodhi in another with Karthik out of the loop.
I'm excited to see how accurate my predicition are! I didnt bother including a winner because i still think its too early to tell. Game ON!
Wow a discord call this early in the game!! Strategy? Nope! It's... Alyssa explaining tarot cards to me. Gotta do what you can for social game ig (its ok now we're talking about romcoms)
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iz me beech
what a gift, hi im mo. a dumb bottom who treats himself like shit so no one else does.
IM AN ALL STAR ISNT THAT INSANE. I cannot express how excited I am to be playing this game, plus I fucking love this cast. Like my tribe? Fantastic.
Alyssa - The sister I always wanted. I love her she’s so great.
Matt - New good friend and probably who I’m closest to at the moment I get happy when he gets online cus he gets me and my shit.
Jack - He can rap and he’s nice, what an icon.
Rhys - SUCH A SWEETHEART, I’m so excited to play with him again.
Karthik - Also super sweet, he seems like a genuine guy and I’m looking forward to playing with him.
Tobi - I love that I get to play with him again we haven’t talked all too much but we’ve talked a bit. (I definitely have my guard up around him just cus of something he did in Muxloe)
Bodhi - Kinda inactive unfortunately but he seems nice.
Mo - Dumb bitch.
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sits. hi. so like. just like elara im gonna do a countdown to when i can play my legacy because yall CRAZY if you think im willing it to someone else... uh...WAIT.. I JUST REALISED... I THINK I COULD'VE SAVED BIG Z WITH MY LEGACY?? if only i knew he was going... sorry big z... you wont read this.. anyways. ok so. it is final 21. so. 15 (or 8 i guess...) people need to be voted out before i can play it.. i can DO IT. and this time i am not telling a SOUL about it. like. NO ONE.. and the beauty of the legacy is that people shouldn't really even suspect it exists.. heehee!
ANYWAYS! let's talk about the game. so. my tribe is a mess. i love zach and chloe... chris is a king.. i played elara with drew h and he's a babe so there's that. michael king. and sharky hasnt been on much because he's busy which is like awful timing n i feel bad especially if we lose because i think he might go? :-(
as for the other tribes.. bryce asked to be allies i said shure. i love rhys.. thats all bye
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UPDATE!! i love BODHI!!!!!!!!!!!! like..... wow. hes such a king. no words at all.
Our tribe has lots of stuff done on our sheet. I hope we are able to get it done. I hope we can win immunity, first tribal will suck.
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Omg. 3 minutes until sheets are locked. Im kind of nervous. I really want us to be immune.
My tribe mates- Rhys: he is amazing and i feel like we get along pretty well. We have been talking. Mitch: also very nice. Was the first person to message me and i really like him. Kori: we talked a bit. Is someone i need to talk to more. Bryce: my marmoreal f3. ❤️ Jared: amazing guy and really like talking to him. Would work with him. Stephen: the person i least have talked to but i need to talk to more.
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I’m am extemely excited that we won immunity. It gives me more time to talk and bond with these people. Im really liking my tribe. I hope we can keep winning immunity. (Knocks on wood)
We won! Yas! It's unfortunate that we couldn't snatch the reward, but we came close and I think that counts for something.
Chloe and Drew definitely carried the Orfeo tribe to their reward, meanwhile Karth practically killed Cyrena himself. I'm pretty happy being that perfectly middle score on my tribe. High enough to be a contributor, low enough to like not be a threat for try-harding or something.
I'm gonna hopefully take this time to get to bond with people more. Chloe and I are getting married apparently which is cute. She's honestly pretty sweet so I'm already a hardcore stan.
Gonna enjoy the time off, and see what this idol system is about. Maybe I'll get lucky this season.
i am OVERWHELMED like ok so most the cast i feel like doesnt like me. my tribe has ppl who arent super active (this is literally marmoreal flash backs) kori is so.. much idk JKFADSHFKJ like he just is rly.. there! jared is my new fave i love that man so much we are going so far KNOW that. rhys.. an angel i LOVE him i just get him and he gets me. maynor? doesnt reply idk its off. stephen.. not here. mitch? ignores me for long time. so ya that sucks but wooh jared and rhys! also LOVE chloe, loris, zach, maybe tobi!!!
YAAAAAAAAS safety is so important right nowwwww, having safety is crucial bc I wanna keep my friends in this game and keep building bridges. I also have a little advantage to help me search for the idol and nobody needs to know about it except me so hopefully soon I’ll have an idol in my back pocket!
The first few days of this game have been fun. I always enjoy getting to know a new tribe of people. Still, all of these people are essentially new to me. I've been in VL's with Kori and Mitch, and I helped host Jared in Wakea, but playing with people is a totally different ballgame. Still these 3 are probably the relationships I'm most interested in investing time in right now.
As for people off of my tribe, I feel pretty good about my old Komnata castmates. Alyssa, Zach and Karth all worked well with me in the pre-merge and I can definitely see myself working with them here as well. Chris is also my BFF I would literally die for him. Jack is also someone I know well and I know he's a good ally, but we're also playing another ORG together at this very moment (SBBB7) and I just made a move there knowing he wouldn't approve of it, so that's something I have to keep in mind as well. I think as long as I can set myself up well on this current tribe, I could be in it for the long hall!
Looking at the challenge results, it looks really bad for my bro Karth. It's gonna suck if he goes first because we instantly connected back in Komnata, but hey, I don't think I have the clout to save him here. It's the first tribal council and there's no basement to hide in this time.
Today is gonna be a big day though. Before Cyrena goes to Tribal Council, I'm planning to reach out to Mitch and Kori about formally becoming allies. Just like my first season, I'll use the idol search as my opening statement!
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SO lots to discuss. First off, we got fucking demolished in immunity. Fucking embarassing. Matt Alyssa and I showed tf up with 100+, and Mo and Bodhi weren't far behind. Tobi did not have a good showing but FUCKING. KARTHIK. TWO POINTS? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? That's disgraceful this is god damn all stars you're a WINNER and you give 2 god damn 1 point submissions. Get the fuck out of my tribe. He should be the easiest first boot in history but of course everyone wants to pussyfoot around for the first 12-18 hours of tribal and not throw out a name. But there's no avoiding this. He's inactive, he has a bad timezone comparatively, and he did diddly poo in the challenge. He's. Gone.
Luckily I find myself with 2 quick alliances right out the shoot, a trio with Alyssa and Matt and a duo with Bodhi. I found myself gravitating to these 4 a lot the first couple days, Mo and Tobi are a bit quieter so I like these 3 allies for me moving forward. Sidenote, BoJack has got to be the greatest alliance name in Celestial history. I'd go back and look to compare but I'm lazy.
One World is still kicking my ass, a lot of people want to talk to me and I don't have the energy for it but damn it I guess I have no other choice, I can't just not respond to them.
Ok so fucking karthik made an alliance with Me, Mo, Matt. And spilled his heart out to us. But we left him on read and now he’s super lonely. Hopefully he doesn’t have an idol or whatever.
Also this game started!! I’m very busy with school but I have things to say. I’m close with some people from before, I really like Loris and Tobi and Alyssa. I’m feeling pretty good about my position right now.
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Fuck yeah, not first boot!!! Although I would’ve loved to win as were so close, but can blame that on my tribe mates cause me and Bryce pulled through.
So right now, my closest ally I feel like would be Bryce. Primarily cause were on the same tribe and then I speak to him most on our tribe, and most of the other cast. Then would be jarred, so I want to make hopefully an alliance between them, maybe another, just to confirm my spot in the tribe.
Feel like my main goal is to make connection, as it seems like everyone else has some with other people. So like if it comes to me someone they don’t know, against someone they've player with before just looks bad for me. So I’m trying to make up with Michael, just so that’s one less target in my back.
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Also I talk to Zach a lot. But don’t trust him at all. We have been “dating” since the cast reveal. But he asked Mo to be in a showmance too?! Plus Bryce said he talks to zach the most but Bryce wasn’t in who Zach talks to the most.
This sounds like Tween drama but it’s so much more.
Am I being flirted with?????????
https://youtu.be/GBCr-tAsKTc
My slow self. In regards to the other castmates- I didnt realize how much I talked to the members of Tuatha. Bryce, Rhys, Kori all are red but I've probably done most of my talking with Jared and Stephen who I really wanna get together with at some point. I've reached out to other people like Jack and Alyssa and Mo. I may be forgetting some people but I'm just gonna keep talking up a storm with everybody! If I had to pick my closest people so far, it definitely would be Jared, Stephen, Zach, and Michael.. stay tuned!
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I FLOPPED at this challenge hard. Drew and Sharky I am sorry for sharing you peeps on the low for being MIA when I was here and performed worse! I am happy we won though because I like my entire tribe and honestly I see a lot of good from them! And so the game begins!
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I am just putting gears in motion! I've made it clear with Stephen, Kori, and Jared I want to work with them. I want to get a cross tribe alliance going and it seems Tuatha is my in though I have to see about other people. As for Orfeo...I talked with Zach on starting a majority alliance with Chloe and Loris, we'll see how it goes and if it is legitimate but I definitely hope I can trust Michael enough to keep him. I still am gonna not get comfortable because I can see myself being targeted but yeah
https://youtu.be/ia3DTwLWMi8
So we’re going to tribal... and honestly I’m terrified bc I was one of the poorer performers in the challenge but the thing is that Karthik got a whole ass 2 in the challenge... a challenge where you get 8/9 points for drinking water... so I would think he’d be the easy vote but everyone was SUPER quiet yesterday and no one wanted to give names but today is looking a bit better but I swear if I go home over karthik.... I. will. call. out. all. of. them. Not only was his score tragic but I don’t think he’s been social at all... people from other tribes think that karthik is definitely going so maybe I’m just crazy paranoid for no reason but idk I’ll have to talk wayyyy more to everyone just to be sure
well here is my first real confessional of the game! Sorry its late been busy.
So firstly my tribe is like super cute. I'm glad i don't know everyone cause then i would be worried, plus i do genuinely like getting to know new people so that is definitely a yay moment. I am also really liking this cast, though more wahmen would be nice but this is all stars, we r not casting wahmen for the sake of it. - anna jane 2k19.
The first challenge? selfie scavenger. a classic if i have seen one. a surprisingly difficult one at that but im glad how well i performed. top scorer on my tribe so i'm really glad about that and how I will be perceived as an asset for a while at least (we will see how that pans out longer down the line). but yay go me! Unforunately, we lost though so like UGH.
During immunity i approached alyssa and jack about a trio, who could control the tribe as i knew we would be high scorers and i genuinely like the two of them. also made sense becuase i sense we are the 3 most active. Karthik, who scored only 2 in the challenge, is probs the target due to inactivity LOL. tobi and mo i also like, but bodhi remains a mystery to me. might be a timezone thing idk but still. a tad worrying that i dont know him as well as i would like.
One World does my head in but im trying to talk to everyone. i've learnt though i need to make connections on my tribe first and foremost as they r the ones who vote, not people on other tribes. god i do hate one world tho. i want to be napping, not messaging people
think im gonna be in an alliance?? on day 3? is this a joke? literally winning................... wow....
I usually make videos but today I am lazy so hello. So One World is ass because I don't want to talk to everyone but these people are crackheads so like I guess. Uhhhhh I'm in an alliance with Jack and Matt because I adore them both greatly. Mo is on my tribe which is so nice because we have played together before and he has such fun energy and is just a ray of sunshine so I'm very happy (although he makes me nervous cuz the last game we played together I killed him for no reason basically.... But I don't think he's the vengeful type). Tobi makes me nervous because I think he is a social king and I mean like... Idk I guess there are a lot of very social players which makes me nervous that I would be pushed out for maybe not being as social? Idk if that makes sense.
But anyway Karthik is also on my tribe and I was like OF COURSE. Because this is the man from my season who I cursed out via DR video for flipping on me LOL He is a sweetie though. I recently looked and saw he was rooting for me a lil in a game I was in which is really nice of him, especially seeing as I didn't vote him to win our season. I think he's going to be first boot. He was on vacation this weekend somewhere where there's no wifi (that's what he told me) and only sent in two things for the scavenger hunt, dooming us to a first tribal. I feel somewhat bad but have told people on my tribe that if not for Komnata's twist of the season he would've been out pre-merge easily because his overarching challenge performance is not great. So basically just reiterating to people that I'm not so sure that this was a fluke and overall I think it's probably just best for us to cut him.
Yeah that's it. I have so much crackhead energy from the games I've been playing as of late I feel like I majorly need to chill the fuck out. Here's to praying.
so everyone’s kinda agreed on voting out karthik due to him only scoring two points so I’m like ok cool i’m down but then karthik made an alliance chat with bodhi, matt and myself asking to be saved and
https://i.imgur.com/AxCzqxd.gif?noredirect
Sooo im making this last minute confessional to tell ya that I THINK im in a good spot. Im sharing my idol guesses with Stephen Z and Jared which is helping me build trust with them. I also have mutual trust with Kori. Maynor and Rhys are kind of boring tbh so hopefully they go soon. Bryce and I never seem to have good conversations so idk where his head is at. IM JUST HAPPY THAT MY CURSE OF ALWAYS GOING TO THE FIRST TRIBAL IS FINALLY LIFTED. I WONT BE FIRST BOOT YAHOO
Short and sweet, glad to be back, beast moded another selfie scavenger hunt. Got a good tribe, I think, couple of good friends, couple new people, at least one I think obvious boot should it come to that, but here's hoping it won't. Not a lot of players from my season so hopefully there won't be too much bad blood coming into this. Shoutout to Chloe Bryce and Tobi who are apparently contractually obligated to be in every fucking game I play on Facebook and associated communities for the rest of my life. 21 people is a lot to get through so I'm just hoping for merge, then we can go from there.
Well let's give confessing on my phone a try.
So far I feel like I've been making decent strides conversing with everybody. It's kinda weird how much I like everyone on this season. Its gonna make being a snake harder but I cant afford to blind myself I'll have to do whatever I'll have to do to hopefully win again.
I've made a sort of trio deal with Bryce and Chris as we're all former winners. I'd have included Kavish but we're all predicting he's more than likely the first boot alarm Tina. I'm growing closer to Zach and Clohie on the outer tribes. Also obviously still have my Bodhi connection. I'm talking with just about everyone a bit. Though I cant shake the feeling there is someone I've missed.
I am concerned not being in any sort of majority alliance on my tribe, so if we do lose that's worrisome but still not being the first boot is a huge relief for me, and hopefully there is only good for me going forward. (I say as 4 people probably plot my demise.)
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Karthik is voted out 5-1-1.
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oh boy here we go
my thoughts on klance at the moment
currently im neither optimistic nor pessimistic, hopefully you’ll see why lol
lets start out with the main thing thats keeping me from going all out klance: theres been word of an animator/writer (i cant find the post for the life of me ugh) who tweeted vaguely about how a lot of people might be disappointed by s8, vld wasnt able to do everything they wanted with the show because they didnt get greenlighted, a lot of things might not add up bc of that, its not the directors’ faults
on the bright side, i dont really understand how the same studio that produced she-ra could not greenlight voltron lmao but on the dark side,, its a scary option that seems entirely too possible based on how things have been going with a//urance.
a//urance SHOULDNT happen. it would harm both characters and ruin both of their big arcs. however, because of this tweet and because of the blushing at the end of s7, im a little concerned.
alright, the last main bit of pessimism concerns just how little time there is left for serious romantic development. to go from a halfhearted rivalry to romance in one season with so many other arcs to finish up? seems tricky. trickier still if we take into account the inevitable Final Battle scene which will take 2 eps at least. (ugh!)
however...
what developement we’ve had between them is undeniably building up to something! why would k+l have all these scenes learning to trust eachother, be kind to eachother, and be genuine, only be tossed away without conclusion? we will get klance interaction in s8, even if only to wrap that up. but that brings us to, well, everything else. the obvious parallels between keith and allura, the “lance wont get what he wants, but what he needs”, all the foreshadowing with the Feud! and the lion switching? again, there’s WAY too much here for it to all be nothing!
let’s not forget that lance and keith choosing eachother in the feud was VERY symbolic. according to LM, the feud essentially tested their bond as paladins and as friends. what better way than to have every paladin pick someone else and no two happen to pick eachother? oh wait, keith and lance did. and its not just by accident either. if the writers wanted to, they could have had no two pick eachother. do the math(heh), it works. but k+l picked eachother. and, they were the only two to do so. this could have easily been an opportunity for allurance, but instead, we got klance. hmm.
also, dont think that just because shiro’s “the” lgbt+ rep, doesnt mean he’s the only one.
honestly, it would actually be pretty smart not to give hints of either lance or keith being lgbt+ as the success of the show pretty much rides on the klance fandom (its true) and it would be kind of a buzzkill if it was hinted about early. i was reading a different meta earlier, and it spoke about how the writers are pretty sneaky, and gave lots of examples on how they switched things on you without you expecting them.
concerning things being hinted about early, we’ve had close to no hype about s8. we had the teaser trailer, but almost nothing else. zilch. and, considering my pessimistic point on how hard it would be to have klance flourish in this limited amount of time (klance would have to be a major focus of the season in order for it to successfully work!) maybe there’s a reason they aren’t (or can’t!) give us any new teaser information.
also, note that a lot of my pessimistic points stemmed from that one post, which honestly could just be a fan trying to get a rise out of people, and probably is. i guess we’ll all find out december 14th :)
#this ended badly oops#klance#vld#voltron#klance theories#klance meta#voltron legendary defender#keith#keith kogane#keith voltron#lance#lance mcclain#lance vld#keith vld#lance voltron#klance!#allura#optimistic klance#pessimistic klance#who knows?#god i cant wait and yet im also dreading s8 fjdjfd#theory#meta#analysis#hmm!
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So far...
Hello again everyone and self. It’s been a while. I think, again it’s just because I’ve been busy or just lazy to type and post, but also that I’ve somewhat been invalidating how I’m feeling and processing things- but I dont think in a bad way. I think more just like... I’m trying to not overreact to things I usually would for the sake of mental, emotional health.
That being said. This is gonna be kinda long, because a bunch has happened but a bunch also has not happened or been said. And I think rather than telling people directly, posting here allows whoever to check in on me whenever (or not) while also keeping myself accountable of what I’m apparently saying or doing at the moment. So yuhhh. Here goes.
So first, there was a moment or two where people asked me to meet up (mentors lol). And I think less than half the time, I stir up courage to message or text these people because 1. They’re busy and forget things often and 2. Why say meet up and not do it. But I think in the midst of business and uncertainty of the new year- jobs, duties, responsibilities, children, life, etc- that I didnt want to say anything. It was also because the bigger half of the time, of those people are actually available, that they’d follow up with a text or message too asking or suggesting when was a good time. None of the few people had done this, but I dont think I was upset or flustered. I think I had tried to be content because i was aware of everyone’s business. It was also sprinkled with bits of doubt because, as always, I’m unsure of what we’d talk about when we meet. That, and or I just don’t know how I’d articulate everything that I’m actually feeling or wanting to feel in the moment that we’re there. I also fear that I’d be too selfish in those moments as I judge what’s worth talking about and what I “actually” care about. But I think its just been me not really trying to worry or care much. But now that things are happening, I feel like meeting up will just get more difficult as schedules and responsibilities, theoretically, continue to grow and expand apart from each other. So on one hand, I feel bits of regret because I feel like there’s things i need to say or explain more (which I’ll do in part later), but also because I need to be less selfish and appreciate that meetings are not just for me but they’re for both and every side. That things are given but also received from these interactions and what seems to not be a big deal to me may make a difference to others. But me, being my type one and pessimistic usual self, am working on these things.
Therefore, as we approach the day that I had initially marked as my “last day,” I think there’s things I havent explained and it would be best explained one on one. But I feel like my angst and over thinking would stumble my words and keep me from being able to say it. And again, I didnt want to directly message just for the sake of convenience and consideration, but also, when people see or figure out, they’ll see. When they know they’ll know. If they know, they’ll know. If never for a while, then that’s okay too. No hard feelings hopefully.
But. Yeah. The offer for me to just stay where I am has Been extended. For me, it seems like it would be for several different and small reasons. One of those being that I often Express a discomfort and Semikey disgust toward other fellowships in the church. This is because my experiences with some of the people or my history with them has not been golden which causes things like doubt, unwillingness, and fear. Another reason being that I also keep saying that I’m not ready to move on—- although I’ve somewhat overstayed due to complications with school (aka school itself)- That I did not want to leave into a new environment of expectation and obligation. I think it was also because I said I’d rather check out other church’s rather than stay if I am expected to deal with such situations.
But i think as I am right now, I dont want to think staying would be good for me. I think I’m also trying to not be completely pessimistic and attempting optimism by giving things a chance, but anyways... I had said it “would be burdensome,” but I think I didnt Express what that meant enough. I think staying longer would be burdensome because Id feel like I’m being granted an easy pass lol. Like. I’m being given an easy way out/in because of my bowl full of apparent Inadequacies, uncertainties, and excuses. I also feel as though I’m being told to go out and be fruitful (spirit of the fruit, cuz we know that i shouldn’t be making no biological fruit and offspring soon), but I’m here saying that I feel fruitless. And although others say that they see my fruit and that fruit is good and steadfast to Gods goodness and love, it’s hard when I dont feel progress. But I think its just more of the growth aspect.
I feel as though staying would make me feel like Im unwilling to grow or grow up. Like, moving on or moving elsewhere is an unavoidable part of life and adulting. And so, I feel as though the burden would be more on me. Things like Shame, guilt, immaturity, unwillingness. Things like “they did this for me because I am not hopeful.” And I think even as one of my mentors semi jokingly (?) said that they should just take over SNL also made me shrink because they’re already so busy and preoccupied that if they took this on somewhat for my sake that I’d feel even more terribly selfish... I think the burden would also be that If I cant or don’t want to move on, that i myself would create images of disappointment; that even if no one else is saying or expressing disappointment towards me that I’d probably stitch some thoughts and lies together to make myself see disappointment in myself for not being able to attempt to survive on my own elsewhere...
I think also, I am trying to be optimistic and give things a chance. Although I’m not a hundred percent confident or sure, I also don’t want to be the usual me and just swerve situations just because I’m not confortable and familiar... I dont want to be complacent because I fear or cringe at what else is there. I think being triggered is okay, but letting me affect it too much can be tiring. But idk. As evident as it seems, I’m thinking a lot. Perhaps it’s over thinking, but i don’t think I sound completely crazy lol.
But yeah... idk. I still feel as though I should maybe have this conversation with people one on one, but if the stars don’t align or schedules and confidence levels don’t show, then oops. I also just don’t want to make it seem like I left or am trying to leave on completely bad terms. But I also hope that I’ll still be able to meet and hang around... I’ve lost enough connections and i don’t want to break more even though I’m probably Lowkey sociopathic and can’t always do well with people.
Yay. Lol. Is this articulation. Because I feel parched and tired already just from this all. Oof.
Wellp. Who knows if 2019 will be another year of hiding and posting to myself, or posting for the sake of accountability and mental health, or if it’ll be less posting because of like. Hm. I’m not entirely sure either tbh. Haha. Especially because I’m not entirely sure if tumblr and how i use it is healthy or helpful either. I guess we shall see.
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