#hope you all have a wonderful and joyous new year

[iguessitsjustme]

Choose Your Own BL - Day 25: Merry Christmas!

You walk up to Gelt, pull him up and over to the mistletoe with you. You hold Gelt by the waist. Gelt’s face turns beet red and you’re sure that you look the same, but you lean in at the same time he does. Your lips meet his and you realize how happy you are to be kissing him. It was a quick kiss, a chaste kiss, but it was perfect. You’re caught up in the moment with Gelt but you hear Snow and Wreath whooping and hollering in the background. You pull back but keep your hand around Gelt’s waist. 

You look over to see Snow and Wreath positively beaming at the two of you. You look down and see that Snow’s pinky is locked with Wreath’s pinky. You make a mental note to talk to Snow later. Clearly you two have some things to catch up on, but for now you turn back to Gelt, place a kiss on his cheek and ask if he wants to go on a walk. Just the two of you. Gelt nods and takes your hand in his. You tell Snow and Wreath that you and Gelt are going on a walk and you probably won’t be back. They look like they’re ready for some alone time, so you say your goodbyes and head out with Gelt.

You never would have thought when you first met Gelt that you two would end up together, but you are so happy things turned out the way they did. It was an adventure getting here with him and you can’t wait to see what adventure is next for the two of you. But for now, all you know is you’ve never been happier than you are, walking down the road and looking at the lights, hand in hand with Gelt.

To Be Continued…

Thank you everyone who took part in this with me! It was a lot of work but I had a lot of fun. I will likely not be doing a choose your own adventure again but I don’t think I’m done with these four yet. I have plans for later.

You all have made this year on tumblr truly special and I hope you all have a wonderful new year!

Day 24 here.

The beginning of the story here.

[sakkiichi]

HERE COMES THE SUN.

They comfort you while you’re having a difficult time.

ft. Childe, Lyney, Albedo, Shikanoin Heizou x gn! reader.

cw/genre: hurt/comfort.

for my dear @https-furina I know you’ve been going through trying times lately, so I hope this can comfort you a little <3 I also struggled a lot with Heizou’s part, so I apologize if it’s no good at all…

if you enjoy this, reblogs and comments help more than likes !

✧ CHILDE

Linen sheets feel like ropes on raw skin against the morning chill.

Its warm cream color, ashen, nothing like the mirror sunrises you were used to witnessing right after you opened your eyes.

What’s the point in opening them anymore? You wonder.

You bury your face against the pillows. In any other occasion, you would have been grateful for the coolness of its silk.

Now it’s just an iceberg. Like a missing shard of your shallow beating heart.

“Someone’s sleepy today.” A familiarly perky voice greets, the mattress dipping slightly with new weight.

You rolling in the other direction is all the greeting that meets him.

“Hey, love! It’s time to wake up!” Childe chuckles, his hand gently shaking your body.

Yet something already tells him this is not right; you usually would have already shoved him away by now.

But today you’re just… unresponsive…

The dull oceans of his stare rise in dangerous waves at your state.

Hesitant, he calls your name, his tone more like a question.

And this time, he does get an answer.

Familiar arms he adores wrapped around him loop around his middle, your face burying against his chest.

You’re warm, yet you feel so… faraway… as if the pain of past memories was seeping out your light.

Ajax is no stranger to the despair palpable in your strong grip around him, he’s endured it himself, through years robbed of him by an abyss that turned him into a master of all weapons.

So because he’s known the cold of endless nights where all he had was a tattered red scarf to remember the warmth of a distant home, he now holds you.

And for someone whose hands were tainted in the filth and bloodshed of a lifetime of slaughter, Ajax is undeniably gentle.

His fingertips ghost over your skin, easing the burning anguish of bed covers that felt too rough, too suffocating, too wrong.

When your lover’s hands get lost in your hair, combing it, you swear sun rays filter through the deep sea you’re falling through.

And then, suddenly, the choice to swim upwards presents before you, scarred sun-kissed hands extended towards you.

You take them.

When you open your eyes, russet sunsets and constellations over your beloved’s skin greet you.

His lips find yours, a bit chapped but gentle; not his usual playfulness, but soothing aquamarine waves.

You swear Childe’s kiss tastes salty. And that’s when you realize the dry tear-tracks down your cheeks.

He made them dry, sunlight evaporating puddles after grey days.

You break the surface, the waters now turquoise beneath Ajax’s light.

He won’t let you sink again.

✧ LYNEY

A whole audience’s cheers fill the Opera Epiclese. Lights shine upon every smiling face, every vigourous clap of hands after the magician’s grand finale echoing through the theater.

However, the illusionist’s gaze of amethyst is focused on the sole grim expression amongst millions of joyous others.

Yours.

Your hands move, clapping together, as if automated; your eyes stare at everything, seeing nothing; your mouth is a taut line, your lips devoid of their usual vibrant tint.

Lyney doesn’t like that being his last memory before the curtain closes.

When you step out of the Opera House, an infinity of starfields is abloom across the crepuscular skies.

What a mockery; a cruel jinx on display, for you to see the unfulfilled sparks dimming inside your heart.

A sigh escapes your dry lips, a small cloud forming when it meets the late night chill.

“You’ll catch a cold there, mon coeur,” Someone you know, tricks and all, utters behind you.

Welcome warmth tinted in lavender envelops you the instant your eyes meet the magician’s starry ones.

A small smile tugs at your lips, the curse of melancholy still clinging to you through it.

“Lyney…” You start. The twilit breeze picks up around you, your arms instinctively wrapping around yourself for some semblance of a warmth you haven’t felt in days.

“That won’t do, ma chérie.” Your lover chuckles.

Then, with a wave of his hand, a piece of the night sky itself seems to become tangible in his grasp.

“Here,” he offers, draping it over your shoulders.

Upon closer inspection, you realize it’s a shawl; the cloth feels delicate to the touch, quite fine too, and yet, you feel the warmth of a thousand suns. If you had to describe its color you would come up empty. Silver glitter seems to be embedded in the fabric, but at the same time, it looks like multiple tiny lights had been stitched to the material. You suppose you’d call the hue, dark; a myriad of indigoes merge into violets, threaded together with navies and cobalts. And yet, when you move it, the colors seem to shift, almost like the clouds drifting across this midnight.

“I take it you liked it.” Lyney smiles, softer than his usual cheshire-like grins, when he observes your wonderstruck features.

“Very…” You muse, awestruck at the magical silk.

“It’s a châle de ciel,” your beloved explains, “It will change depending on the state of the sky at each time of day.” He pauses, eyes, the color of lumidouce bells and rainbow rose petals merged, glinting as he admires how the garment fits you. “But I can guarantee,” your illusionist steps closer to you, plucking something out of your hair. “That it will always keep you comfortable… warm or cool, whatever you need.” He finishes, handing you a pluie lotus.

You take a few seconds to appreciate the second gift of the night. The flower’s petals are the same color as Lyney’s eyes, yet not as vivacious.

“Shall we go, mon amour?” Your boyfriend inquires, already offering your arm to him.

Together, you leave the opera house behind.

You hope for light blues on your new cape tomorrow morning. And somehow, you know that’s what you’ll find.

You squeeze Lyney’s arm gently. The sun will rise soon.

✧ ALBEDO

When he sets foot on his camp in Dragonspine, Albedo finds the heater already on.

Strange.

The sun hasn’t even quite awoken yet, the snowy peaks outlined against skies still clinging to dreamless cloudy nights; shards of ice, embedded in the softness of dawn clouds. An accurate representation of the region of freedom’s snowy mountains: menacingly beautiful, brimming with lethal charm, for one step in the wrong direction, and the cold might as well consume you for good.

At this hour, no one was ever already working at his lab, making of these moments calm sunrise-tinted memories in the alchemist’s mind, before the day’s hustle and bustle began.

However, today, the running heater is not the only out of the ordinary salutation to greet the chalk prince.

The acute sounds of clicking vials, books being rearranged and crunching snow are confirmation enough that he is, indeed, not alone.

With silent steps, Albedo advances, keeping one hand hovering over his trusty sword. Then, he finally lays eyes upon the cause for the commotion, and despite the lack of danger, the sight doesn’t calm him any better.

“My dearest?” He calls. The instant your gaze meets his, your condition scares him more than any bandits ransacking his research material. Your hair is messy, falling on your face; dark circles are etched beneath your lower lashline, darkness clinging to you like remnants of turbulent nights; and you’re shivering, whether from the cold or because you’re distempered he can’t quite discern, although it’s most likely due to both.

“Hello, ‘Bedo…” You mutter, the flesh of your lips bitten, flecks of Dragonspine’s freeze coating them, the cold lacing with your bones, chilling you to the core. Your eyes widen when you notice your lover’s teal gaze scrutinizing you. You quickly busy yourself with classifying some potions, by color and texture, whatever takes the longest for him not to worry about your less than ideal condition.

However, perhaps you underestimated his attention to detail; for he has a skilled artist, after all.

“My love, are you feeling alright?” He questions, gloved hands gently taking the crystal vial-filled wooden box you were carrying off your trembling hold.

And in that instant, you don’t know if it’s the warmth of your prince’s hands on yours; or the comfort of his voice, like honey on bitter tea, but you find yourself taking a deep breath, the fresh air of a midwinter’s sunrise filling your lungs.

And then you talk. You spill every worry and bad dream, your shadows opening up to the gilded starlight of him.

And through it all, the alchemist’s hands warm yours, fingers interlocked, very much in the way your souls are undeniably so too.

Because no matter how daunting the river seemed when you faced it alone, when you were with Albedo, its typhoons calmed down, stone bridges and his outstretched hand painting safety and comfort in hues of gold before your eyes.

While the kreideprinz grounds you, the sun reaches its peak, a canvas of aureate and cornflower blue grazing the mountaintops.

You would be okay.

✧ SHIKANOIN HEIZOU

Emerald eyes read through you as if you were made of clear glass.

The way you worry your lower lip between your teeth; your fingers almost going white at the knuckles as you clutch a pencil, its wood creaking in your grip; and the general absentminded state you’re in, papers scattered over your desk, several case files stacked in disarray.

Something is clearly weighting on your mind.

“I think a break’s in order, wouldn't you agree, sweetheart?” Heizou suggests, standing up, those striking eyes of his fixed on you.

The detective’s voice is enough to stop the quickening clock ticking in your mind, regrets and dark spirals momentarily coming to a halt.

When you rise your furrowed brow, shades of maroon and viridian flood your sight, vivid as summer and warming your up just as much.

Nodding, you stand up too, limbs feeling heavy despite the comfort of your lover beside you.

The brown shades of your office turn into blue skies and soft pink sakuras not long after, the scented tree branches swaying above you, like fragments of dreams someone had given up on, waiting to be picked up by another soul who dared to imagine.

Your back rests against your lover’s lean but strong torso, the sweet smelling breeze combing through your hair, as Heizou’s chin rests on your shoulder.

“So will you tell me what’s wrong, darling?” Are the words of his that break the birdsong-filled calm.

A pang settles on your chest, you didn’t want to take away that cheeky grin that most of the time decorated his quick-witted lips.

“I…” You hesitate. “Well, it’s- it’s complicated, Heizou…” Your lids flutter closed, a shaky breath raking through you, as you turn around in his embrace, your hands bracing on his shoulders. “I don’t want to bring the mood down, you know…”

The detective places a thumb on your lower lip, smoothing over the bite marks you left there earlier.

“You never, ever, bring the mood down, dear. Never.” He leans in, brushing a soft kiss over your forehead. “My intuition told me right away there was something up.” He takes a stray cherry blossom petal from your hair. “So, why don’t we take the rest of the day off, love?” Your partner proposes, as he takes your chin in between his fingers, mischief flashing in his features.

And perhaps your lover’s smile was more infectious than you had ever given it credit for; and maybe the way he flashes his green eyes at you has your heart trembling in ways that have nothing to do with the fear and guilt you’ve been festering, but you find yourself retorting back, with a grin of your own:

“Don’t you have cases to solve, detective Shikanoin?”

This time, he takes a full sakura flower, delicately placing it behind your ear.

“I have something more important to solve right here…” He smirks, cheekily, as he admires your now flustered expression.

When you lean the side of your head against his chest, he cradles it with one of his hands, the other playing with the ends of your hair.

It would be unfair, if gloom were to take your soul captive when spring seems to linger through Inazuma’s breeze.

With a last look at you, the detective’s maroon lashes flutter closed too. He hopes, at least for today, he managed to protect precious you from the crimes of cruel sorrow.

He leans his head on top of yours.

The case is solved.

[zoldsick]

- Something Lost, Something Gained -

collab w @nanpecan

⚔︎ summary | zoro x f!reader - After two years of training and hardship, you and the rest of the strawhats reunite at Sabaody. What should have been a happy reunion between friends turns sour between you and Zoro after some unresolved tension threatens the dynamic of your friendship. How can you get things back to how they were before?

⚔︎ tags | smut, masturbation, pining, jealousy, nobody knocks before entering, nsfw, MDNI

⚔︎ wordcount | ~7.2k

⚔︎ Read on AO3

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Two years had changed everything. 

Zoro was the first to arrive at the Sabaody Archipelago. Perona had eyed Zoro as he anxiously sharpened his swords the whole trek there. She smiled to herself, she knew he was becoming more excited the closer he got to the meeting point in Sabaody. The closer to his goal he got, the more antsy he became.

Zoro knew Luffy’s decision had been for the best, and because of it he was able to hone his skills well beyond what they had been two years prior. His fingers itched for an opportunity to show off his new skills, to show the crew how much he had been training. He couldn't help but wonder how you had fared during your two years. There was no doubt in his mind you had gotten stronger as well.

When you’d first joined the Strawhats, you and Zoro immediately clicked. The two of you worked seamlessly together as you advanced through the Grand Line towards Luffy’s dream. You drank, you sparred, and you laughed together as if you were two sides of the same coin. But the way the two of you fought alongside each other was what truly connected you. Zoro’s swordsmanship was harsh and powerful, he cut down enemy after enemy with his offensive techniques. You, on the other hand, specialized in defense and used your opponent’s own strength against them. Your styles complemented each other perfectly and anytime you fought together it was a deadly pairing, a true sight to behold. 

However, what was supposed to be a joyous reunion quickly turned into a game of cat and mouse as the crew narrowly made it off Seabody. 

You’d admit that you were disappointed to learn that Zoro had been first only to wander off out of boredom. Typical, you thought. If he had just waited a little longer he would have seen you arrive second and the two of you might have had some time to talk. You were so excited to tell him all about your two years of training. Your mind often wandered to the rest of the crew. You wondered where they were and how they were growing. 

You took a moment to reflect on your dismay for not being able to speak with Zoro. Why did it bother you so much? Was it because you wanted to tell him that he had often occupied your thoughts over the last couple years? That when you were at your lowest, the only thing that had gotten you through was the thought of making him proud to fight alongside you? You shook the thoughts from your head. What did you even hope to gain from confessing this to him? 

For as long as you’d known him,  Zoro only had one goal, one ambition, and it was to become the World’s Greatest Swordsman. His loyalty to Luffy knew no bounds as he had no doubt that their captain would lead them to their dreams. So, you pushed back your selfish desires. You both trained hard for the better of the crew, so expecting anything more would be foolish. 

There was no denying that the two of you had gotten exponentially stronger. With a small slash of his sword Zoro could now take out dozens of enemies, and your deflection and offensive fighting had become second nature, easily beating opponents ten times your size. 

Unfortunately, there was no time to celebrate your new strengths before a glaring issue arose during your first fight together on Fishman Island. The two of you had never been so out of sync. 

How did two years change both of you so drastically? 

You both cursed out loud, frustrated as you ebbed and flowed to completely different rhythms. You would reach out to strike an enemy, only to almost be impaled by Zoro’s blade. Zoro would prepare to strike, only to be thrown off balance by an enemy body that you flung in his direction. Luffy laughed as he watched the two of you struggle, which only added to your irritation. 

By the time the battle was over you were disheartened to say the least. Zoro couldn’t even look at you, and you couldn’t find the words to say to him either. Should you apologize? You didn’t think you had done anything wrong, he had been in your way too. The more you thought about it the more annoyed you became. Your mind raced in circles about the ridiculous situation. You came back to reality as you heard a voice calling out to you - Sanji. 

You relaxed your furrowed brows and the unconscious frown on your face faded away. The curly-browed chef sauntered towards you with a glass delicately balanced on a tray. “Oh Y/N-love, please enjoy this dessert I’ve made for you. I’ve poured all my love into it. Only the best for my fighting beauty.” 

You looked up to see a colorful, intricately decorated cup of chocolate mousse. You instantly lit up. Sanji knew it was one of your favorite desserts. You quickly scooped a spoonful into your mouth and closed your eyes as you savored the rich flavor. “Sanji, you don’t know how much I missed your cooking.” You took another bite and smiled widely, looking up at him. “If I wasn’t in such bliss I would get up and kiss you, I really would.”

Sanji turned to you with hearts in his eyes and shot backward as streams of blood rocketed out of his nose. You heard Chopper yell out, “He’s relapsed again! Y/N you can’t do that, he’s in recovery!” 

You laughed as you watched Chopper fret over the lovestruck man. You always got a kick out of teasing him. Your eyes flickered up to the kitchen door and you watched Zoro push it open, exiting with a dramatic thunk. 

… 

Zoro walked out in a worse mood than before. He knew he had messed up during that battle, both of you had made mistakes. He had almost hurt you on numerous occasions and that had completely thrown him off his game. He went over to the ship railing and stared out. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. 

He had been avoiding you, he didn’t know what else to do. Ever since he saw you again he knew he needed to keep his distance.

 You had come back different. Your hair was different, your clothes were different, your body was different, and you were shitload stronger. But your voice? It was exactly the same. God…he hadn’t realized how much he had missed the sound of your voice. And your eyes? He had to look away every time you turned in his direction, he couldn’t stand it. Beautiful. He had always known this. He knew he didn’t know a lot about beauty and pretty things, but there was no denying it anymore. You were beautiful to him.  

He gripped the railing in frustration. What was he thinking? You’d looked so angry sitting there at the kitchen table. Your eyebrows pressed together and the corners of your mouth pointing down in a scowl. You had been thinking about how useless he had been, he was sure of it. He needed to clear his head, he needed to work out. 

…

Robin was out on the deck of the Thousand Sunny enjoying a new book about ancient tribal societies. She sipped peacefully from a cup of tea and looked out into the horizon. She didn’t think she would ever get tired of the sunsets on the Sunny. Her eyes wandered slightly over to where a green head of hair had been huffing and puffing and aggressively lifting weights for the past two hours. She sighed. 

She had been watching you and Zoro these last couple of weeks and figured out the source of the tension immediately. It really wouldn’t be good for the crew to have some of their best fighters distracted and clumsy, she told herself. They were in the New World now and all members needed to be at their best. She stared back at her book as a plan formed in her mind. It was for the good of the crew, it really was. 

…

Zoro got up from his spot near the mast and stomped past Robin at her table. “How long do you intend to pout over Y/N?” she asked, not looking up from her book. 

Zoro stopped and stared at her, “What are you saying?” 

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed. I’ve got eyes everywhere after all.” She looked up at Zoro as he tried to keep a straight face. “Just go talk to her. She’s in the women’s bunks right now, she just finished showering. It's a good time to have a private conversation. Just go clear the air. Trust me.” 

Zoro just grunted in reply and kept walking past her. Suddenly a hand popped up as he reached the top of the stairs, pointing a slender finger towards the left. “It's that way dear,”  Robin said. He grumbled. 

Zoro turned to his left and slowly walked towards the door of the women’s bunks before halting in the middle of the hallway. What was he going to say? You had seemed so aggravated before, how was he supposed to fix this? As he hesitated, he thought of how the two of you used to be. He was so desperate to get back to that. These feelings needed to stop here, you were in a pirate crew and you both need to remember that. He snapped his head up and marched toward your door.

Zoro was full of determination now. He was going to clear the air like Robin said. He wasn’t sure what he was going to say, but he was sure he would figure it out. Anything was better than where he was now. He wanted to make it work. He wanted to make it up to you. 

Zoro gripped the door handle and burst into the room without thinking or knocking, thunderously declaring, “Y/N! LET’S GO BACK TO THE WAY WE USED TO--!” 

You were naked.

 His eye dropped down to look at the red pair of panties you had on. 

Okay, not completely naked. 

You stared at him in shock as his eye wandered up your body, finally meeting yours. 

“GET OUT!!!” you shrieked, breaking the silence. You grabbed the towel out of your hair in an attempt to cover yourself up. “OUT! NOW! ZORO! OUT!!!”

He turned on his heels and moved forward at lightning speed, running straight into the door frame with a crash you thought might have shaken the whole ship. He readjusted and flew out of the room, back out to the deck where he saw Robin, still sitting there with a book in hand. 

She looked up from her book lazily and her eyes went straight to the red welt across his face. “How did it go?” she asked with an amused smile. 

“Yes,” Zoro said, hands on his knees while he panted, still stunned about everything that had just happened. So much for getting back to normal.

Robin stared at the poor man as he walked off towards his room. 

…

You stood in the room, frozen. The initial shock of Zoro walking in on you had passed, but you still couldn't process it. You stared at the open door, unmoving, and struggling to breath. You felt your whole body get warm as you thought about Zoro’s eye moving up your body. You shook your head to free yourself from the memory and hurried to dress yourself.

If Zoro had been avoidant before, he was like a ghost now. For the rest of the day you swore you could feel Zoro’s intense gaze on you, but the second you looked up he was nowhere to be found. It was maddening. 

You tried to ignore the green menace and go about your day as normal. You sat in the kitchen and helped Nami grind some ink and helped Chopper organize some herbs, but your mind was elsewhere. You sat with the others who plugged away as you half-heartedly joined in.  

You kept replaying the scene over and over in your head. He had looked like he wanted the earth to swallow him whole. But there was something else. You contemplated the gleam you saw in his eye. It was familiar to you, he looked like that when he was in battle, when he faced a real challenge. When he placed his precious Wado Ichimonji in his mouth and finally challenged a worthy adversary. 

It was hunger.

You felt the blood rise to your face and reached for the sweet drink Sanji and left you. As you chugged down your drink an image danced at the corner of your mind. Zoro, mad with hunger, but instead of his sword, your underwear was in between his teeth.

You choked. Coughing loudly, you sprayed your drink across the table. You winced as you tried to catch your breath and rid yourself of the tantalizing image you conjured up. You felt Chopper’s tiny hoove smack your back rapidly as he tried to help you. 

“Y/N! Be careful!” Nami exclaimed, snatching away her notes as you coughed near them. 

You put your hand up to signal you were okay. Robin smiled from her seat at other corner of the kitchen. 

“Sanji! Get her some water!” Chopper exclaimed as he continued to beat your back. 

“It’s alright, I’m okay,” you said, clearing your throat. 

“But you’re still bright red!” he cried. “Breathe! Breathe through your nose!” you laughed and gladly accepted the water Sanji offered you. 

“Are you alright, Y/N-love?” Sanji asked. 

“Yes,” you tried to collect yourself and play it off. “I’m afraid the flavors of the tea you’ve brewed for me were a shock to my system!” You joked to help get the attention off of you. “The depth of the flavor! The notes of bergamot!” you exclaimed, your voice still gruff. 

You watched Sanji spin around in circles around the room, “All for you my beautiful Y/N-love!”

“Do you have to egg him on, Y/N?” Nami asked with a bored expression as she watched the cook rejoice. 

“I can’t help it, I missed him. I really did.” You smiled at her. “You have to admit he’s good at what he does every once and a while. I’m just making up for lost time.” 

Nami shook her head with a smile. You heard the kitchen door open with a loud thud and a flash of green hair exit. Had Zoro been in the kitchen the whole time? You had been too engrossed in your thoughts to notice. You looked down at your now empty glass and grimaced. Why was this so complicated? You backed out of your chair and excused yourself to get some air. 

…

The night breeze gently blew through your hair as you leaned over the banister to look out onto the Sunny. 

Despite all your attempts, you found yourself thinking back to Zoro and the look on his face. Were you right about what you saw? Was it hunger? Or somehow worse, desire? Your stomach felt warm and your throat felt tight. You put your head in your hands. There was no way. He didn’t think like that, all he thought about was his swords. You were reading too much into it. 

Let’s go back to the way we used to. His words replayed in your head. So, he had noticed something had changed between the two of you. You wondered just how much he had noticed. 

You sighed, growing increasingly frustrated you ran a hand through your hair. Why were you so caught up on this? You were being childish. A pirate ship was no place for romance. You needed to clear this whole thing up. 

The kitchen door opened again as Robin walked out. You quickly straightened up and turned towards her, throwing on a half-hearted smile. 

She stared at you for a beat before smiling back. “Penny for your thoughts?” 

You looked at Robin and hung your head in defeat. “I really am easy to read, huh.” 

“I don’t know what you mean,” she said in her usual sly tone. You were quiet as she leaned over the banister next to you. “I heard some commotion from our bunks earlier in the day, did Zoro get lost again?” 

“It was nothing,” you answered too quickly, “I just chewed him out for not knocking.” 

“Oh really?” you knew your face was red so you didn’t look at her. “I did see him shortly before that. He seemed very determined to do something. I wonder what it was.” Robin eyed you curiously. 

“He always looks like that. When he’s not sleeping, that is.” 

“True,” she said. You both went silent for a bit. You looked down below as movement caught your eye and you saw Franky messing with the helm of the ship. “Two years really makes the heart grow fonder. I’ve missed you all.” You turned to look at her. Her eyes were locked in on Franky. You followed her gaze to him and saw a hand sprout from the nearby beam. It reached out to gently caress his cheek. 

Franky leaned into the touch and once Robin’s hand disappeared he turned back to look at the both of you and laughed. Then, he dramatically struck a heart pose with his massive arms and yelled out, “MY SUUUUPPPERRR LOVELY GAL!” 

Your mouth fell open and you looked back at Robin in shock, “Since when?” 

Robin kept her gaze on the blue haired man, smiling fondly. “Back at Water 7,” Your jaw dropped. “It’s rare to meet people that make you feel like your most authentic self. Meeting Luffy and the rest of the crew, I’ve never felt like I’ve belonged until now. But, I’ve also never felt as seen by anyone else until I met him.” Her eyes never left the goofy cyborg. “We may be pirates, but we’re owed our own pleasures here and there, are we not?” 

Franky continued his barrage of various poses for Robin as she looked on with amusement. You watched the two in awe. You had no idea they had such affection for one another, but somehow it made perfect sense. As you observed the pair, Robin’s words echoed in your head. So, a relationship like this is possible, huh? You cursed yourself and swiftly dismissed the thought. There was no point in getting your hopes up. 

“Y/N-love! Robin-chwan! Dinner’s ready!” Sanji announced as he burst through the kitchen door. “Franky! Get your ass in here you greasy oaf!” He went back inside. 

“You should go tell Zoro dinner is ready,” Robin said, stepping back from the bannister. You unfortunately couldn’t see her devilish grin as she headed into the kitchen. 

You took a couple seconds to collect your thoughts. Finally, after taking a deep exaggerated breath, you turned on your heels and headed for the men’s bunks. 

… 

Zoro grumbled to himself as he stomped back to the men’s bunks. He had been hiding in the back corner of the kitchen as he sulked and nursed a bottle of liquor. Overhearing you praise that dumbass cook sent him storming out of the kitchen. He knew he acted like an impulsive child, but seeing the way your face softened as you complimented Sanji had been the last straw. You had never said a word about Zoro’s skills. You never spoke about how much you missed him. He knew he had been fucking up with you ever since you reunited. He fucked up in fights and now he had fucked up the chance to talk to you. He was losing his edge. 

Discarding his shirt, he threw himself onto his small bed and covered his face with his arms. He willed himself to calm down and get a grip. He needed to sleep. He was no good on this ship if he kept behaving like this. However, rest did not come. 

Despite his conviction, his mind wandered back to you. Back to the moment he had walked in on you. He played it over and over again in his mind. You had been so shocked, so embarrassed, but he couldn’t help himself. You had looked so…soft. 

He closed his eyes as he tried to recall every detail. He thought of the red underwear that hugged your hips. He thought of the shape of your lip as your mouth fell open in shock. He thought of the deep blush that crawled across your scarred skin down to your shoulders. He thought of the shape of your breasts and the color of your perky nipples, cold and wet from your shower. He thought of the smooth curves of your body and your calloused hands desperately trying to cover yourself. He thought of the smell of your shampoo that filled the room with your aroma and made him feel drunk. He still felt drunk. 

An all too familiar sensation settled in his core. He opened his eyes and frowned as he looked down at his pants. Damn it. 

Zoro ignored the guilt he felt as he pulled back the hem of his pants and reached down to touch himself to the image of you. 

… 

You approached the men’s barracks and stood in front of the door. You reached for the handle and put your hand on the twisting the knob, preparing to burst through. When suddenly, you heard something. It was faint, a sort of mumbling. You pressed your ear against the door. 

“Fuck-” You froze. “Fuck, just like that. Please…” 

You were too shocked to move. Zoro’s voice rang out again as you stood by. “S-Stupid Cook, fuck- Stupid curly-brow.” Your mouth fell open, dumbfounded. Was he talking about Sanji? “Thinks h’s so great. Good at what‘e does?” His words were slurred as he grunted. “I’m good too, I’m so good. I’ll show you-Y/N-fuck.” he moaned “I’ll show you just how good I am.”  

Your whole body pressed against the door. Did he say my name?

… 

Zoro was hot. 

His breath hitched as he spat into his palm and regripped to thrust himself into his fist. You were everywhere. His mind was filled with you. You were the cause of all his frustrations. This was all your fault. 

He struggled with the blankets around him and threw them to the ground in exasperation. Zoro crawled to the edge of the bed, never stopping his hand from moving up and down his cock. This wasn’t enough. He scuffled to his feet, still pumping himself with one hand. He used his other hand to grip the side of his bed to keep himself steady. This position wasn’t helping either. He was even more restless. He still wanted more. He wanted you. 

“Y/N.” Zoro moaned out your name, unable to keep his words to himself. His hips were twitching and his hand that gripped the post begged to be holding something else. 

… 

Carefully, you clicked open the door and slipped inside the dark room. Zoro’s back was facing you and he was too much in his own world to notice your presence. You watched as the muscles across his bare back flexed and spasmed as he vigorously stroked himself.

“God, please. Please, Y/N.” Zoro spoke in a whimper. His voice was even more clear than it had been before. You forced your breathing to stay steady as you watched Pirate Hunter Zoro beg for you. Your cheeks burned at the sight before you. Your fingertips twitched and deep inside your core felt tingly and ticklish. 

It seemed that you both were nearing the last of your patience. Zoro’s breathing quickened and his pace became more erratic. You could tell he was getting close. 

We can’t have that now, can we? 

You slammed the door closed behind you and watched with excitement as Zoro’s back straightened and he snapped to face you, and what a sight it was. Zoro looked at you with a mixture of confusion and lust, his face was flush and he struggled to hide his obvious erection with a blanket from the intruder. “What the hell! Don’t you assholes ever knock?!” he spat out. But when his eyes finally adjusted to the dark and Zoro recognized who was standing in front of him, his expression turned to shock and embarrassment. 

You smiled. Everything made sense now. 

Zoro began to move to cover himself more adequately, but you stopped him, raising a hand, “No, please,” you stared as your other hand reached behind you to secure the latch on the door. “Don’t let me distract you, Zoro.” 

The way you whispered his name sent chills down Zoro’s spine. “Y-Y/N- I - this isn’t - I didn’t mean-” 

“Keep going.” Zoro looked at you in shock. You continued, “You were calling my name, weren’t you? I’m here now, so keep going.” 

There was a slight hesitation in Zoro, his eyes searched yours for some kind of explanation. But with the very subject of his indecent thoughts standing in front of him, egging him on, he knew he couldn’t stop here. 

Zoro leaned back against his bunk and without breaking eye contact, moved his blanket to expose himself to you. His thick and lengthy cock twitched with excitement and ached to be touched. You walked forward and let your eyes trail along his body, you wanted him.. But you had to be patient for this. You took a seat on the adjacent bunk facing Zoro. The pressure between you was crushing and both of you were losing grip on your long held restraint. 

“Go on,” You instructed the man in front of you. 

As if he was released from a spell, his hand moved automatically, gripping his stiff cock in his hand. Closing his eye, he teased his tip slightly before shoving himself into his palm with a satisfying thrust. Zoro couldn’t stop the guttural moan that escaped his mouth. He opened his eye to see your reaction and nearly moaned a second time. 

Your face was completely flushed with desire as you gawked at Zoro, taking in every inch of his toned body and throbbing cock. Your mouth was watering at the sight. You weren’t sure you had ever wanted someone this much. Your whole body was tingling and becoming sensitive. 

You wanted to feel good too. You began tracing your fingers along your neck, shuddering at the sensation. You grazed the hem of your shirt and in one quick motion you yanked it over your head, exposing yourself and your bra. 

Zoro, high with his own arousal, immediately took a step forward upon seeing you uncovered before him. But before he got any closer, a hard shove from you sent him flying back to his original spot. He looked at you with annoyance and confusion. 

“I don’t remember saying you could stop, swordsman,” you said with a sly smile. He stared daggers at you. “Keep going, and watch closely.” 

You slid your fingers in your mouth, tasting the lingering salty flavor from Zoro's sweaty body after you had shoved him. You ran your tongue along your fingertips, never breaking eye contact with him. Zoro’s breathing hitched as he gaped at you, his pace quickened and he began using his other hand to tease his balls. You smirked at his reaction, slipping your other hand underneath your bra and gripping your breast. You were getting lost in your own self pleasure. 

Satisfied with your prep, you removed your hand from your mouth, slick with your own saliva, and pulled back your skirt to reveal your red underwear. The same pair from before. Zoro caught a glimpse of the wet stain at the center of your panties and bit his lip. You looked back up at Zoro to see his yearning eyes drilling a hole through you. You circled your fingertips around the fabric at your center, effectively teasing both you and Zoro. 

“Zoro,” your voice caught him by surprise, he looked up to meet your lustful gaze, “do you touch yourself while thinking of me often?” 

Zoro clenched his jaw, then he smirked. You were such a tease, but two could play this game, “Do you think you’re that special?”

“Hmm,” you hummed, playfully turning the ends of your lips downward. His eyebrows furrowed as he was brought back to that moment in the kitchen and how upset you had appeared. He grunted as he pumped himself rougher, his frustration rising. 

“Did that make you upset?” he said, his voice dripping with irritation. “I’m not that pervy cook, it takes more than a little teasing to win me over.” 

You smiled, amused by his evasive responses, “Well then, should I give you some inspiration?”  

Zoro’s cocky smile faded as you pulled the fabric of your panties to the side, exposing your wet cunt. You looked back up at him one last time before finally giving yourself some relief. You closed your eyes and began caressing your clit, gasping from the contact. You were feeling more sensitive than usual as Zoro’s unwavering eye watched your every move. You moved your fingers lower, and circled around your entrance, lathering your fingers with your own juices. Finally, you inserted two fingers, and your body relaxed from the pleasure. As you worked yourself, you widened your legs and reached your other hand down to massage your swollen bud. You bit your lip, but failed to hold back your aroused voice. 

Zoro was mesmerized as you fingered yourself in front of him. He couldn’t believe this was real. It took every fiber of his being to control himself and not launch himself at you. His chest felt tight. He wasn’t used to feeling tied down or powerless. In all honesty, it was a turn on seeing you take charge. However, his composure was wearing thinner and thinner as he watched your fingers pump in and out of our glistening pussy. 

“You look like you’re having a good time over there too, huh?” Zoro was testing his luck, he knew he was just about over the edge himself, “How often do you think about my cock when you fuck yourself like that?” 

You were too far gone to keep playing this game. Your pace quickened on your swollen clit with one hand, and the other continued to curl inside yourself. You huffed out in exasperation, “Zoro - I want you to come. Come for me.” 

“You witch - ugh!” The pressure inside Zoro burst. His face turned up towards the ceiling while his hand maintained his rhythm as his body spasmed with pleasure and his warm cum spewed out. He fucked himself against his hand through his orgasm, spreading his fluids across his still stiff member. Zoro was left breathing heavily, still drunk on his orgasm, unable to properly comprehend what exactly happened. 

Zoro’s head rolled down as he caught his breath, and his eyes finally came back up to you. Your eyes were closed tight as you also struggled to regain composure. It took Zoro a moment to realize - while he was riding off his own high - you had also reached your climax. 

You came. And he didn’t see it.

Unaware of Zoro’s disappointment, you chuckled as your world still spun around you, “Who knew you’d be the type to listen well?” You pulled your panties back over your leaking cunt, wiping your fingers on your skirt, “We’ll talk more about…” You hesitated, “whatever this was, later. Sanji says it’s time for dinner, so we’d better-”

Zoro stood, grabbed your wrist and forced you to stand. In one swift movement Zoro flipped you around, pulled your skirt to the floor, and pressed his chest hard against your back, pinning you tightly against the wall. With his knee he spread your legs apart. Your head spun from his touch. Before you had a chance to react, you could feel the sensation of something foreign slide its way between your legs. Your eyes peered down and you could make out the tip of Zoro’s cock, bright red and still covered in his own cum, rubbing against your wet underwear. 

“We’re not done here. I think it’s your turn to listen,” Zoro slurred in your ear, “and show me how well you can take it.”

His arms wrapped around your chest and stomach, effectively trapping your back against his chest. You had always been impressed by Zoro’s intimidating size and strength, but even more so since your reunion. As the muscles he had trained for two years pressed hard against your back, you couldn’t help but moan. His mouth was level with your ears and you could hear his uneven panting. Your clit was begging for attention, so you attempted to roll your hips around Zoro’s dick to create even the smallest bit of friction, but Zoro held you back. 

“You’re acting pretty needy.”

“D-Don’t be an asshole.”

“I think I’m being pretty fair,” he smirked, enjoying watching you squirm against him. 

Zoro took a step back, creating some space and your heart ached at the loss of his touch. Thankfully, the lack of touch was short lived and you gasped as Zoro pulled your panties to the side. He then handled his own dick to brush roughly against your clit before stopping right at your entrance. Zoro grabbed your hands and slammed them flat against the wall above your head 

“Now, fuck me,” Zoro growled, “Show me how you like it.”

Your heart skipped several beats before you made a move. With your own slick combined with Zoro’s cum covered cock, there was enough lubrication to easily slip the tip inside yourself. Your hips shook as you pushed your ass backwards, forcing his cock to sink further inside you. You caught your breath as you were filled with his overwhelming length, sensations of pleasure and pain mixing with each other. You knew you weren’t taking all of him, but it was all you could manage. You hesitantly fucked yourself on his cock, moving slowly as you felt yourself being torn apart. Slower than Zoro had the patience for. 

“What happened to your confidence? There’s still a long way to go.” Zoro mocked you in a strained voice. 

“Give me a break,” you squirmed under him, unwilling to stop the rhythm you had achieved, you were feeling good, “Seems to me you- ah- have it easy right now.” 

Zoro frowned at your words. Easy? He was using every ounce of his self control not to immediately come inside you. Watching your flushed back shiver underneath him as you bounced shyly in front of him was enough to make him pass out. Zoro was brought back to reality when he saw your legs begin to shake and your pace become more desperate. Right before you could reach your second climax, Zoro stepped back. 

You whined as your legs nearly gave out from the loss of his supporting hands on yours. “What was that for! I- I was so close!” You cried out in frustration. 

Zoro turned you around to face him, bringing  himself down to your eye level and slurred, “I wan’a see yer face.” His pupils were wide from arousal, and his words sent goosebumps down your spine. He looked like a wild animal. 

Zoro grabbed you by the back of your neck and crashed his lips onto yours. As much as you wanted to savor your first kiss together, it was definitely not a romantic one. The kiss was forceful and messy, his tongue found its way inside your mouth overpowering you from the inside. He moaned and hummed as he kissed you and the vibrations tickled your lips. His hands trailed everywhere along your body, tracing your neck all the way down your back, harshly gripping your ass. You struggled to appease his assertive nature, but eventually allowed yourself to be swayed by his pace. Your hands gripped his shoulders and you stood high on your toes for better access to his lips. Finally, Zoro bit down on your bottom lip, lightly tugging on it as he pulled away. 

His eyes trailed down your body, stopping at your bra. With one quick movement, your bra was torn from your body and laying in pieces on the ground. You hardly had time to be angry about your ruined clothes before Zoro shoved you down onto his cramped bunk. 

Zoro was on top of you in an instant, trailing kisses and nibbles down your neck and to your freshly exposed chest. He shoved his hand down your panties as he sloppily sucked and bit your hard nipples. You flinched back from the electric current that ran down your spine as his fingers slid against your folds. Zoro struggled underneath the fabric and finally hissed out in frustration, gripping the hem and beginning to rip away at the seams.

“Hey, wait-wait-wait! Don’t rip those, they’re my favorite pair.” You pouted. 

He looked at you, jaw clenched, “Fine,” he relented. He seized your legs and propelled your hips upward with one arm and pried your underwear down with the other. 

With your clothes out of the way he leaned back and spat on his hand and immediately plunged his fingers inside you. His face bent down again to your chest and stomach and he began leaving marks across your body. Simultaneously, Zoro pumped and curled his fingers at an excruciating pace, his fingers were far thicker than your own and it stretched your walls out in the best way. It felt incredible, but you wanted more. Wanted all of him. You wanted him to fuck you. 

“Enough- Zoro it’s enough. Please, just fuck me already.” You begged him. 

Zoro raised his head to examine your flushed face. You were sweating and stared back at him with lustful eyes.

Zoro wanted to be patient. He wanted to make you writhe beneath him as he continued to take charge as revenge from before. He wanted to do all those things, but with one look at you he lost his motivation. Zoro hastily shimmied himself out of his pants and cast them aside. Then he sat up between your legs and aligned his throbbing cock with your entrance. 

You clutched the sheets behind you and squirmed as Zoro gripped your hips tight, forcing himself deeper inside your soaking tight pussy. Zoro’s patience was long gone, and in one fell swoop he bottomed out, shoving his entire length into you. 

It was to be expected, but it quickly became clear to you that Zoro was not a gentle lover. But whatever lack of tenderness he showed through his brutish movements, was made up for in his gaze. Desperate and burning, he wanted all of you. 

You placed a hand on his chest and you could barely register what was going on around you. His size was overwhelming, rubbing and stretching every fiber of your being from your deepest core. Zoro only gave you a few seconds to adjust to his size before he pulled himself out and slammed back inside you. He watched as your face contorted with agony and lust as he continued to pound into you ruthlessly. Zoro grabbed your hand away from his chest and entangled his fingers with your own. He lifted your hand up to his mouth and ran his tongue down the back of your hand and to the tips of your fingers. 

You were getting dizzy. “Slow- ugh- down. You’re- ah! Too fast!”

“You’re shameless,” Zoro smirked. “You have’ta take responsibility for your teasing” he said showing off his teeth before leaning down and shutting you up with a sloppy kiss. He ran his tongue along your jaw, and left hickies across your neck. You moved your own hands and legs to capture him and bring him impossibly close. You needed to feel every inch of the man before you. 

Zoro felt intoxicated. Your soft body underneath his fingertips, your saliva mixing in with his own, the sweet smell of your sweat, and the way you clenched him tightly. He couldn't get enough. You were better than any liquor. 

Zoro untangled himself from your limbs and brazenly lifted one of your legs onto his shoulder. You watched greedily as he straddled your other leg and reinserted himself. The new angle reached a spot inside you that sent a shock throughout your body. Your back arched and your hands clawed at his thick thighs. Zoro reveled in the sting of your nails and reached one hand to knead your clit and with the other he held your leg tight against his chest. He let his tongue run a trail along your calf, finally stopping to sink his teeth into your muscle. You cried out, and Zoro's eyes lit up in arousal at the noise.

 You were getting close. Every touch, grind, and thrust was working its way through your body building tension in your core. Zoro watched you closely as you pinched your own nipples and your hips bucked upward to meet him halfway. He saw your eyebrows pinch together tightly as you whimpered, “Pleasepleaseplease-” the coil burned hotter and hotter.

“That’s it, let me see you come. I want to see you come for me.”

With a final gasp you reached your climax. The world around you shattered and your whole body shook as the immense pleasure overtook you. 

Zoro took in every second, every twitch and shake as he fucked you through your orgasm. As the overstimulation racked your body Zoro also reached his peak. With a few final rough thrusts, he moaned as he released inside you at the deepest point. His cock twitched as it spilled his warm cum, filling you completely. You clutched at his body pulling him onto you as you both rode out your highs. He wrapped his arms around your waist and you entangled your fingers in his hair as your thighs gripped him.  

You both lay there in each other's embrace, sweaty and panting. 

As you both calmed down and the reality of what you had just done, dozens of your conflicting emotions began swirling in your heads. Relief. Desire. Exhilaration. Panic. 

You both knew that everything had changed. But as you lay next to one another, feeling each other’s heartbeat and breath, you couldn’t help but smile. It was obvious that the two of you would not be returning to normal, but somehow, you were both ok with that. 

…

The Strawhat crew was in a great mood as they ate their dinner around the table. Luffy and Brook sang cheerfully in-between bites of Sanji’s incredible dish. The rest of the crew chowed down on their meal smiling at their captain's antics. 

Suddenly, Nami looked around perplexed. “Where's Y/N and Zoro? Luffy’s gonna eat their portions if they don't hurry.”

Robin hummed as she chewed her last bite, and shared a knowing look with Franky, who stifled a laugh. “Y/N and Zoro were sparring in the crows nest. They were finally getting back in sync so it's better we don't bother them. I'll be sure to save their portions.” Robin smiled innocently. 

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⚔︎ authors note | everyone follow @nanpecan, this wouldn't have been written without her, she slayed the first half, frobin insert, and final edit. and thank her for bullying me to actually finish writing my parts. all i want is to write silly little situations of my fav troupes so we shoved a couple in here lol. hope y'all have fun

[driftersreverie]

For the lifetime he has lived, Scaramouche had nothing to favor.

There was nothing for him to pick, anyway. He had no hobbies, for all the tasks he learnt to do in the past were just that - tasks. He'd done those out of a need for a purpose, a drive for validation, but Scaramouche was no longer a fledgling stranded on a branch. Flowers and trees are all the same to him, and this unsubstantial world never lacked its flora anyway - always something new to find, to marvel at, then to be bored of in the end. Don't even get him started on mortals — animals and humans alike — that lived the most boring and short and miniscule lives when compared to the lifespan he spent alive. Scaramouche would spit and scowl and curse -- how absurd for one to think he'd care for another worthless life that would just die out in barely half a year he'd know them.

Scaramouche had nothing special to call his favourite, and there was no reason for him to do so then.

But the Wanderer does now.

The Wanderer wakes up in the morning, mechanically so yet humanly still blinking away the fog of sleep. He forgets not his hat, not his scarf, and definitely not the personality of a man-puppet that's lived 500 years and more, then he leaves Buer's side to find you.

His day only truly begins when it's your face that he sees first. He wastes no time; he greets you, says his 'hello's, maybe add something remarkably sassy just to see you hold back your irritation and force a smile so awfully unlike you. The Wanderer snickers, a battle won in which he knows you liked him enough not storm off like a certain "senior" Kshahrewar (he's older, mind you) or scatter like bugs on a kitchen floor. Without warning, you then held his hand in yours, perfectly fit as all things should be, and he doesn't shy away - at least, you don't think so. The only thing that gave him away, had you looked closer, is the downwards tilt of his hat, and the uncharacteristic smile he cannot suppress.

With you, the Wanderer finds good company in ridiculous, inaccurate history books; in boring, nosy lectures he loathed to join; in the busy streets and bustling bazaars that he disliked strolling through; and in the stillness of the night and his quiet mind. He never realizes it, but he looks forward to seeing that wonderful smile on your face. Every sarcastic quip he would anticipate your bright laugh, no matter how many times he'd call it grating for his mechanical ears. In each and every joyous expression, this childish and naive puppet hopes that he'd remain the sole reason for them.

Yes, the Wanderer fails to see a reason to start having favourites in this new chance of life, but he didn't need a reason nor excuse to allow you to claim your place in his heart - his number one priority and first exception to everything.

(And because I partake in EBG; @iceunhie @naraven . Thank me later ;D - assistant)

[dnd-writes]

It's Not You, It's Me

AO3

Tags: Non-con, surprise surprise Sex toy!Gowon, con to non-con, forced creampie, painal, lots of painal, slapping, fingering, forced orgasms, sexual slavery, bondage, sex toys, mind break A/N: Happy birthday to Princess Gowon! (hello @kaedespicelatte)

You pull out then take the condom off and offer it to Gowon. While you head toward the edge of the bed to look through your things, Gowon is busy audibly slurping the cum out of the condom. She likes the taste of cum but hates blowjobs, at the same time she loves having sex with you but doesn’t like creampies (and because she’s a responsible, sexually-competent woman who doesn’t want the risk of getting knocked up or risk getting STDs). You’ve always wanted to cum inside of her, in any hole really, but no matter what you ask the answer was always a no. Even just simply anal she wouldn’t agree to, with or without a condom. Even just once you would want to cum in her but it seems like that moment is years away, maybe it might not even arrive. You love her but sometimes you hoped she would consider, what about your needs?

You finally find your wallet but to your surprise you find no condoms inside, you search through your pants but to your dismay, nothing. You suddenly remember that you left all the ones you bought back at your place and it’s too late to go back and get them. What do you do? You’re still hard and horny and the birthday girl wants her gift of vaginal sex and a mouthful of cum. Maybe today is the day?

“Oppa, is something wrong?”

“No, no, nothing. Just… couldn’t find my wallet,” you flat out lie but it did the trick anyway, Gowon lies back down and continues sucking your cum out of the used condom. You take the wrapper of the used condom and pretend you’re opening another one, you hurriedly put on the “new condom” to make up for lost time and quickly get back on top of Gowon.

You bury your face into Gowon’s neck, peppering her exposed skin with kisses and nibbles, tickling her but only to avert her attention from what you’re really doing. The tip of your cock presses against her opening and you can already tell how much you’re going to enjoy it. You push your dick inside and the initial feeling is already orgasmic, the warmth, the wetness, the freedom, previously restricted by those damned pieces of rubber now able to be felt by your cock.

You feel Gowon shift as you start pumping your cock, out of fear you start sucking on her skin to bring her attention back to your mouth. “Oppa, don’t…” You pull away quickly, slowing down your thrusts as you stare at Gowon scared. She, however, just chuckles at your reaction. She pulls your head to the other side of her neck, “Don’t stop…” she mutters.

You raise Gowon’s legs as you start thrusting harder and faster, the heavenly sensations brought from fucking her cunt raw exhilirating you. You’ve never heard Gowon moan so much before, your quick thrusts and your attack on her neck sending waves of pleasure throughout her body, and it’s all thanks to you finally fucking her raw. Maybe she’ll thank you even, thank you for such a wonderful fuck, then maybe she’ll let you fuck her raw another time. “Fuck, oppa… You feel so good in me! Yes, just fuck me like this all the time.”

Though as you ponder on the joyous reaction it is giving you, you also start to feel resentment grow in you knowing Gowon held this away from you, a two-year long relationship with an active sex life and not once have you two done something on your terms. No blowjobs, no anal, no raw sex, hell, not even handjobs were done without the use of a condom. You’re tired of it. This majestic feeling of her vaginal walls clamping down on you, you crave more of it. You feel a newfound boldness rush inside of you as you fuck Gowon raw against her wishes, you’re starting to feel an urge to fuck her ass tonight too… whether she lets you or not.

You feel your orgasm approaching and a hint of panic sets in you. Where do you release, inside or out? Does it really matter? Either way Gowon will find out you didn’t use a condom so you might as well make the most of it. 

“Fuck yes, oppa…” Gowon cries out, though this is the first time you’ve heard her sound so enthusiastic and you know you should be happy about it but it just makes you angrier knowing that you two could have experienced this much sooner. You channel your rage into your hips and now you’re practically drilling into her. “Cum with me… Oppa, let’s cum together.”

Gowon’s fluids gush out and shortly after you feel your cum shoot into her womb, her body rocks and shakes as the pleasure fills her head. “That was am— Wait, what the hell?” Her euphoric state is short lived as she feels an unfamiliar warmth residing inside of her pussy, she pushes you off of her and, upon seeing your dick exit her without a condom, she punches your arm. “What’s wrong with you?! I told you to use a condom, you jerk!” Gowon punches your arm again and you flinch, caressing the part of your arm she hit twice.

You flash her a wicked smile, “But you loved it didn’t you? You were moaning so loud and you came hard. Don’t tell me you didn’t love that.”

“Love it? I hated it. You came inside me! Now get out of my place, you ruined my birthday, thanks so much.” She slaps your face as she stares at you with a mix of frustration and confusion. “I just ask you to use a condom when we have sex, is that too hard, oppa?” She twists her pronunciation of your nickname, adding a sarcastic twist that makes it sound like she’s reminding you of what you’re supposed to be to her.

Gowon tries to get up but you push her back into the bed. This time around you slap her face. She gives you an angrier look, her hand flies towards you but you catch it and grip her wrist, then you slap her again, and again, and again. Anger quickly turns to fear and her eyes begin to water. “I-I’m sorry…” she chokes out. “P-Please, oppa… You’re hurting me,” she begs, but you grip her wrist tighter and she shouts in pain. 

“Two years. Two years and you never want to have sex the way I want. I just ask to fuck without a condom once, or even anal, or even a blowjob. But. You. Won’t. Allow it.” You punctuate each final word with a slap to Gowon’s face and now she’s full on sobbing. 

“I’m sorry, oppa. Please…”

You should be ashamed of yourself for doing such things to her but the stinging in your palm and the sounds of her crying just invigorate you instead. You feel your cock throbbing heavily, lightly slapping against Gowon’s wet pussy. You take your cock and ready yourself to fuck her pussy raw again but the moment you see her tiny asshole, you quickly switch plans.

Gowon notices your slight pause and starts to scream when she sees you aiming lower. “NO! No, please. Not there, please, anywhere else but there. We can have sex… without a condom any time, you can cum in me always. Just not my butt please, oppa.” Gowon begs and tries to negotiate as if her life was on the line but you’ve already made up your mind, there’s nothing she can say or do that will stop you from claiming her anal virginity.

“Just relax, Gowon. Unless you want it to hurt.” Gowon quivers in fear as you poke your index against her rectum, you try to start by fingering her ass but Gowon is already whining as you struggle to even fit in one finger. “Hnnnggg… I-I can’t, your dick won’t fit, oppa. Please… You don’t have to use condoms, ever! I’ll… I’ll let you use my mouth, and, and, and my pussy… Yes, I’ll let you use those any time you like, just don’t… Just not my butt, please!” Another futile protest falling straight into your ignorance, it’s so funny seeing her squirm, struggling to fit a tiny finger inside her tight butthole. You just know wrecking her ass with your cock will easily become the best thing you’ve ever done and the best experience you’ve ever had in your whole life. 

You try for one last time, you dip your finger in Gowon’s mouth and coat it in her spit. You try fingering her ass again but you only manage to insert up to your fingernail before you start struggling. Maybe you can forcibly stretch her ass using your dick, that sounds like a much better plan to you.

You grab Gowon’s hands and put them on her butt cheeks. “Spread your ass for me, bitch.” Gowon’s reluctant and hesitant, but seeing your stubbornness she knows there’s nothing she can do to persuade you from destroying her butt though she still tries. “Please, oppa… I’m sorry, I’ll make it up to you, just… not like this.” Her voice is much weaker now as her hands try so desperately to open up her asshole, even so, her ass looks relatively the same, it’s like her ass wants to stay as tight as ever. You don’t mind, it just means it’s more painful, which means you’re going to enjoy every second even more.

“Hnnnngggg… Please, PLEASE! It won’t fit,” Gowon screams, begging for another time as she feels your cock poking her ass. Her sphincter is so tight that you can’t even get the tip through, it feels like you’re a chisel cutting through stone. You dig your fingers into her hips, anchoring yourself as you push further. Gowon’s screams intensify as you slowly rip her ring open. It takes so much effort just to make it past the entrance but your tip forces its way through and you feel her hole wrapped tightly around your girth.

“I can’t take it… Oppa, please… It hurts so much… Please, PLEASE, FUUUCCCKKK!!!” It really does feel like you’re tearing her insides apart, even though you’ve breached the entrance you feel yourself pushing through her anal walls, still making room for your entire dick to fit inside. Gowon’s cries are relentless, only ever stopping when you stop moving or to inhale some air. It’s so different compared to when you usually have sex with Gowon, she usually just moans or yells she’s coming. But right here, right now, her voice fills the room, screaming like there’s no tomorrow. You much prefer this side of her, much louder, much more expressive. You no longer feel like you’re the toy in the relationship, no longer feel like you’re only being used during sex as you turn the tables around and use her instead.

You suddenly feel Gowon’s soft butt pressing into your crotch, you look down and realize you’re fully sheathed in her ass. Gowon’s screams stop and are replaced by erratic breaths as she still struggles to hold you inside. Her ass is like heaven, sure it doesn’t have the warmth and wetness her pussy offers but it’s so much tighter, it feels snug but at the same time it squeezes you like a vice. “Wow, your ass is the best. Now I know why you wouldn’t let me fuck it, you knew I would get addicted, fuck…”

“Oppa… please take it out… I’ve learned my lesson, I’m sorry,” she squeaks out after recovering some of her energy. 

“What lesson? There isn’t any. I’m just claiming what’s mine.” Your hand snakes up to Gowon’s neck and you see her brace herself. Your fingers wrap around her delicate skin and you just begin to squeeze. You can feel Gowon’s breath, her rapid pulse, and all her swallowing as you continue to constrict her neck. At the same time, you feel Gowon’s ass clench and tighten around you, the more you squeeze her neck the more her ass clenches. She really is a toy, a toy for your own personal pleasure.

You’re not even fucking Gowon at the moment, you just have your cock stuffed fully into her ass, but the way her walls tighten and clench periodically, you might not even have to. You toy with Gowon’s neck, randomly switching up how tight you grip it. You clamp down on Gowon’s neck, suffocating her, you can feel every struggle through her neck, every choke, every gag, every attempt to breathe, it’s wonderful. You let go before things get too far, the life in Gowon’s face lights up again as she’s allowed to breathe, but you keep your grip on her neck, just enough to feel every sensation coursing through it.

You give Gowon’s pussy a nice hard slap and her body jolts violently, her ass clenches harder and as her hands give way and let go, her asshole tightens way more than it just did. Gowon tries to stretch her ass open again but you have a different plan for her hands.

“Touch yourself, make yourself cum,” you order.

“Please, oppa… I don’t—”

You slap her pussy again and she screams at the top of her lungs. “Fine then.” You take matters into your own hands as you shove three fingers into her cunt, still wet as earlier. “You’re liking this, aren’t you? You’re so wet. You love my dick in your asshole, don’t you, you whore,” you say, mocking her for still being wet despite what you’re doing to her ass.

“No, I don’t. I… don’t…” Gowon tries to refute but you squeeze her neck and prevent her from talking further.

You haven’t moved your hips in a long while and yet you feel yourself so close to cumming. You keep your grip on Gowon’s neck hard, just enough for her to still breathe. You start pistoning your hand in her pussy, practically punching her crotch at the speed you’re going. You use the other parts of Gowon’s body like buttons on a remote, affecting the way her anal walls clamp around your cock.

“Cum with me, let’s cum together,” you say, repeating the very words she told you earlier. You continue to piston your hand into her pussy without abandon. The closer Gowon gets to her climax, the tighter her ass squeezes you, and the closer you are as well. You slowly start to lose yourself in the sensation, gripping her neck harder and pumping your arm faster. You keep going and going until you’re practically crushing her windpipe and turning her pussy lips red. 

Gowon starts screaming with what little air is left in her system as you feel the rush of her juices surge past your fingers. Shortly after you reach your own high as well, shooting rope after rope of your cum deep down her ass. You pull out and collapse beside Gowon, both of you panting after such intense orgasms. 

Gowon starts to speak, forcing out words as she regains her energy. “Get out. I’m not gonna tell anyone about this… just as long as you leave me alone. I’m gonna clean up first but after that… I never wanna see you again.” Gowon sniffles as she fights tears after breaking the relationship. She makes attempts to get up but her legs are barely getting off the bed. Finally, after a few tries, you see her stand up. You notice Gowon grabs her phone as she heads to the bathroom and you immediately get to your feet. “What are you doing with that?” you shout, stopping Gowon in her tracks just a few feet away from the bathroom door.

“Nothing. I promise. Nothing. Just… leave me alone!”

You catch a glimpse of Gowon’s screen, the numbers “112” already pressed shining bright as day. You lunge after Gowon, she tries to turn around and use the bathroom as shelter but she trips on her own feet and ends up flat on the ground. You quickly pin her arms behind her back and use your other hand to reach for her phone, you quickly press the red button in time while it is still ringing. 

You press Gowon’s head down, pushing the side of her face even harder into the floor. Gowon wails as she tries to squirm from underneath you but her strength is unmatched with your entire weight on top of her. 

“I’M SORRY, OPPA! I’M REALLY SORRY! I PROMISE I WON’T DO IT, I PROMISE!” Gowon shouts and apologizes but you’ve had enough of all of it. You shove Gowon’s face even harder causing her to groan in the additional pressure burning into the side of her head. You’ve had enough of her, her antics, her false promises, her empty apologies, her pussy. 

Maybe Gowon does need a lesson after all, maybe she needs a lesson to not mess with you. And what better way to teach her than to give her what she truly deserves—a good pounding. 

You try to keep her steady but her small body keeps squirming to free herself, one simple slap to the face does the trick as she goes limp. The tip of your cock presses against Gowon’s asshole again. “Scream. Scream for me, bitch. I want to fucking hear it,” you whisper into her ear, knowing just how bad it’s gonna be for her. 

No more of that slow and steady bullshit you did earlier, Gowon’s had her time to adjust to your size, if she still can’t handle it then that’s on her. You shove yourself inside, spearing through Gowon’s anal walls. You groan as you hurt yourself from trying to force your cock inside a tight hole but that doesn’t compare to the absolute feral, guttural scream coming from Gowon.

“AHHHH STOP STOP! I’M… SORRY! STOP PLEASE PULL IT OUT!” You drown in the sounds of Gowon’s pain as you thrust relentlessly into her body. The pleasure you garner from her screams drowns out the pain you feel as you struggle to fuck such a tiny hole.

“Fuck… Your ass is so tight, it’s gonna milk me forever. You wanna be my cum slut? Just taking my cum in your ass all the time?” You lightly tap her face a few times, reminding her that you’re talking to her.

“NO PLEASE… I’M SORRY, I REALLY AM!” Gowon barely manages to shake her head with her face literally pressed against the floor. 

“Well, too fucking late. I make the decisions now.” You let go of Gowon’s body and lean forward, finding a better angle to destroy her ass in. Though her hands are free, they just fall lifeless at her sides, not even attempting to do anything to save herself. Gowon’s ass really is made for milking cocks as you feel yourself approaching yet another orgasm. The tightness of her anal walls just proves too much for you to even contain yourself for too long. 

“Take my cum, you dirty fucking whore!” you shout as you feel your cock draining into her insides. You pull out and stand up and Gowon just lies there motionless with a trail of white leaking between her legs. “When I’m done with you… You’re going to want nothing but my dick up your ass.”

You can’t risk letting Gowon out, can’t risk her talking to anyone else. You have to keep her, you must keep her by your side forever. You get up and start looking through Gowon’s belongings, though she’s still unmoving on the floor since you left her alone, your eyes still shift constantly at her body just in case she tries anything.

At her desk you find her vibrator, just a simple wand massager, and you know just where to keep it. Rummaging through her drawers you manage to find some zip ties, perfect. You head back over to Gowon and start tying her wrists together behind her back. You carry her back to the bed then turn on the vibrator and press it against her clit. You close her legs around it then tie her thighs and ankles together.

“Oppa, please… I’m sorry…” Gowon’s voice is barely audible through the soft buzzing between her legs. You would love to hear her moan and scream but the constant begging is beginning to annoy you. You head over to her closet and the first thing that you notice is a green dress that you bought for her. You don’t even spare a second as you take it and start ripping through the fabric, its meaning lost on you, and not like Gowon would have a use for it anyway. “Oppa, please, no! Please, don’t! I hate—” You gather up some of the torn fabric and use it to shut Gowon up for good.

You yawn and realize that it’s getting late, it’s been a long night. You climb onto the other side of the bed and snuggle into Gowon. You turn her to her side and raise her leg up so you can insert your cock into her ass, still a struggle to do so but a little less than earlier. Once you manage to park yourself into her ass, you pull her close to you and embrace her, your naughty hands cupping her small chest and playing with her nipples as you close your eyes and slowly drift to sleep. “Happy birthday. Good night.”

Morning rolls around and you realize you’ve overslept, you quickly text in sick and decide to be productive with your day, in regards to Gowon of course. First, you check up on her. Your dick is still rammed inside of her tight hole and as you check between her legs, her side of the bed is soaked in her juices. Gowon’s eyes are half-closed, you can see her try to go to sleep but with the state of her lower half, it’s hard to do so. “You look like you had a lot of fun,” you joke.

Though before you leave, you want to take care of your morning wood, and with Gowon so generously already taking care of your cock, you might as well use it to solve your problem. 

As you get above Gowon, you turn her around and bury her face into the sheets. You only now realize that you can feel the vibrator even while you’re inside of her ass. As you start thrusting into her, you employ your technique of choking Gowon out to force her ass tighter. “You’re really just a fleshlight, aren’t you?” you say, noting the similarities between your toy here and your toy back at your place, especially the way that Gowon’s ass squeezes just as you squeeze her neck.

It doesn’t take you long to orgasm, not with your cock trapped in that tight cage all night as it tightens and pulses frequently. You pull out and smile as you watch your load seep out of her rectum. Two years, that long you’ve waited to finally see such a wonderful sight, and you had to force her just to get it. You spank Gowon’s ass as you leave her. “Gonna be back, just gotta buy a few things for you.” You grab your clothes from the night before off the floor and get dressed, you also make sure you grab your and Gowon’s phone on the way out..

You get into your car and drive into the city to start shopping for new accessories for your toy. The first thing you buy is a dildo gag. As you shove the thing inside of her mouth she starts choking, having not sucked your cock ever her throat isn’t trained to handle anything down there. Maybe with that gag she can finally handle your dick soon enough when you decide to force yourself into her mouth too.

Next you buy two vibrators, the first is one you keep permanently in her pussy, the second is a vibrating butt plug that you use on her ass whenever you aren't home. The last accessory you buy are nipple clamps, with the chain just a little too short to wrap behind her neck but for you it was the perfect length, either Gowon raises her head to let her nipples rest or she rests her head but in turn her nipples are tugged.

Every day before work and every night after, you spend your time in the bedroom, just fucking Gowon’s ass non-stop, you keep a tray beneath her butt to catch all the cum that leaks out and all the juice she squirts, then you either mix it into her food or water before serving it to her. Even after a month of non-stop anal, Gowon’s ass still feels as tight as ever, every moment you fuck her feels almost as great as the first time you did so.

After a while, you move stuff over from your place to Gowon’s. After all, if you’re going to be by her side all the time, might as well just properly live together with her. Now lazy time has upgraded from lying in bed and falling asleep as you watch videos on your phone to cock warming and spooning Gowon while you both watch videos on your phone.

Days turn to weeks, weeks into months, and months into a full year. Your alarm blares and you jolt awake, it’s Gowon’s birthday! You hurriedly and abruptly take everything off of her body, the zip ties, the three vibrators, the clamps, and the gag. The sudden loss of the overwhelming pressure is in and of itself overwhelming, Gowon collapses spread eagled on the bed as her body is in peace, her pussy isn’t overstimulated, there’s nothing lodged in her throat, there’s no buzzing in her ears, and there’s nothing pulling her nipples. She looks over at your naked body standing to the side of the bed, “O… Oppa?” Her voice comes out a little hoarse having not said a word in a year. 

You give her a warm smile as you play with her hair. “Hey, baby. Happy birthday! What present do you want from me this year?”

Gowon takes a while to answer, staring at you, at your dick, then back into your eyes. “A-Ass…” she whispers.

You lean forward with a bigger smile on your face, “Come again?” you ask, you heard it clearly but you wanted to savor the moment.

“Ass… I want… my ass fucked, oppa.” 

You jumped for joy, you did it, you broke her mind. After a full year of endlessly force fucking her asshole, she’s finally asking you to stuff her butt. Lots of new avenues open up as your anal toy has just been upgraded to an anal pet, you can make Gowon drop to her knees and present her ass every time you tell her to or maybe even just make her present ass all the time she’s at home. But you choose to ponder on those thoughts for later, right now the princess has a wish and you’re willing to grant it. As you get on the bed, Gowon raises her legs and spreads her cheeks for you. “I love you, Gowon.”

[shotmrmiller]

best to worst at handling the news that it’s gonna be twins/triplets/multiples? feel free to include other characters too if you want

john^2- so happy to be here oh what a joyous occasion (let's you tear his ear off his head because the one that's gonna be bearing the brunt of it will be you. must be nice being a man whose back won't feel like bella's in breaking dawn at 4 months if triplets. john wants twins, johnny wants as many nuggets as possible.)

kyle- he's cheeky because he was hoping for twins. runs in the family. didn't think to tell you because either he's gone no contact and doesn't think of them or they're distant relatives or something. didn't think it mattered. boasting about it to anyone that'll listen and now everyone's calling him kyle 'the over-achiever' garrick

simon- freaks over a pregnancy scare. he can't deal with new life. terrified of it. the thought of having a human dependent on him for 18+ years makes his palms sweaty. doesn't matter how many it is, he's looking at the belly like it's a world wonder.

graves is a southern man who dreams of a nuclear family so any kind of multiples is always good news. that's what he bought that big ol plot of land for in sweetwater texas.

alejandro thinks twins are a blessing ofc. latinos tend to have big families to fucking bring em. they gotta have so many cousins no one keeps count anymore. (and if he provides said cousins too, great! will get neutered when his so is ready to close up shop.)

and we all know konig is a bastard. he's got his austrian farm. has many apples to pick in the orchard. needs many helping hands.

[lendeah]

Valentine's Day Special!

Merryment Festival

Synopsis: To commemorate the Merryment Festival in your hometown, you decide to give Astarion a gift. Pairing: Astarion x GN! Bard Reader Words: 2.6k Tags: Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day Fluff , Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, just cute stuff 

a/n: HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

"Back in my hometown, we had an annual festival called Merryment Festival," you said wistfully, tracing your finger over his bare chest.

He arched an eyebrow and smirked. "A festival for merriment? How delightfully cheesy."

You smiled, lost in the memories. "It was held at around this time of the year every spring and was a big event in our town."

"I never would have guessed that there's a single festival in your tiny little village."

You rolled your eyes, playfully punching his shoulder.

"What did you picture, Astarion? That we only had cows and pigs and chickens? That's so stereotypical..."

The vampire laughed, using his cold fingers to brush your hair away from your face. "Then enlighten me, my dear. What exactly is this festival you speak of? Please don't tell me it's just another reason for the common folk to get drunk."

You leaned into his touch, your eyes fluttering closed.

"Actually, there is plenty of drinking involved," you admitted with a chuckle. "But the Merryment festival was a time for everyone to come together and celebrate life and love."

"Celebrate love?" He let out a snort. "So it is an excuse for everyone to get together and make more commoners. How utterly wonderful."

A pout formed on your lips as you absorbed his words, a twinge of disappointment stirring within you at his lack of enthusiasm for your favorite festivity. But you were determined to show him just how special it was.

"It's not just about making more commoners, Astarion," you argued. "It's about celebrating love in all its forms. It's a time for couples to reaffirm their love for each other and for singles to hope for new beginnings."

"Oh? I wasn't aware that the commoners needed an excuse to fornicate." Astarion sneered. "They seem to be doing just enough of it without this Merryment festival of yours."

"Astarion! It's not like that!" you whine, "There was music and dancing. Everything was covered in wild flowers. And there would also be competitions for the best couple dance or the most romantic poem!"

"So you're telling me the entire village throws a party for the duration of an entire week to... Dance? And compete for romance?" Astarion looked at her, his mouth curved into a smirk. "That truly is a spectacular waste of time, the village must have nothing better to do."

You narrowed your eyes and crossed your arms. "It's not a waste of time, Astarion. It's a celebration of love and life."

Astarion's fingers absentmindedly traced patterns on your back as he challenged, "What about the people who are here alone? Do they just sit and watch as the couples make a spectacle of themselves?"

"Well, kind of... But sometimes they can participate in the competitions as well, or find someone to dance with." You explained, getting a bit flustered.

"Oh, so you danced with your villager loverboy then?" he prodded, a hint of teasing in his tone.

You swallowed nervously.

"I mean, I was there, but I mostly just watched from a distance."

Astarion's eyes widened and his hand paused its gentle caress on your back. He burst into a fit of laughter, his voice filling the room. You felt a wave of embarrassment wash over you as you realized you had just confessed your biggest secret to him - that you had never experienced the joyous festivities of the Merryment festival.

"That's preposterous! How can you love something so passionately when you have never experienced it yourself?" Astarion exclaimed between giggles.

You couldn't help but feel a twinge of shame and guilt wash over you. It was true, you had always been too shy to join in on the festivities. While everyone else was out there dancing and having fun, you would stay hidden in the shadows, watching from afar.

"Um... well, I guess I just never found the right person to participate with." You mumbled.

Astarion's mischievous smirk softened into a warm, genuine smile as he took in your shy admission. He leaned in closer, his lips almost touching yours.

"Oh darling, I think you already have found someone." His breath brushed against your lips, sending shivers down your spine. "How lucky I am to be your first," he purred.

You tremble beneath the thin bedroll, your exposed skin prickling with goosebumps and your cheeks flushing a deep shade of crimson. Astarion's words left you at a loss for how to respond.

"I never would have imagined..." you stuttered, still trying to process his confession. "I often dreamed of dancing with someone and exchanging gifts according to our tradition... if only I had met you back then." Letting out a sigh, you gazed into his eyes and reached up to gently stroke his cheek. "But it doesn't matter now. You're here with me, and that's all that truly matters."

He grasped your hand and brought it to his lips, leaving a tender kiss on the back of your palm. The gentle gesture sent a shiver through your body, and you couldn't contain the smile that spread across your face.

"And what present would you have preferred to receive from your hypothetical significant other?" he asked, softly.

You paused for a moment, thinking back to your childhood fantasies of Merryment festival. "Maybe a book? Or a new flute?" you pondered deeply before coming to a sudden realization. "No, no! I know exactly what I wanted." You gave him a small smile. "I wanted someone to write me a dedicated poem."

"Ah, a poem?" Astarion wrinkled his nose in disgust. "Of all the things you could want, and you want a poem?"

His reaction made you pout. "I think it's romantic," you say, hoping he'll see your perspective. "But I guess romance isn't really your forte. The closest thing to romance we've shared was when we read that erotic book together."

Astarion reclined in his seat, a cunning grin playing on his lips. "My dear, if you were seeking lovey-dovey poems and romantic gestures, your time would have been better spent with Wyll or Gale."

You snorted. "Yeah, how unfortunate I fell in love with a grumpy vampire."

"Excuse me? I am not grumpy! I simply... I don't like all the fluttering romance. I'm more of a practicer, more a... seducer."

"Practicer," you chuckled, "That's a nice way to put it." You leaned into him, feeling the cold of his body against yours.

He gently wrapped an arm around you, pulling you closer. "And there's no better way than practically demonstrating my love for you, my dear."

You bit back a grin, your heart fluttering in your chest at his words. "So, you're saying... seduction is your way of being romantic?"

He gave you a quick peck on the lips. "Romance is a game for amateurs."

"You're incorrigible," you teased lightly, poking him in the side.

The two of you spent the rest of the evening talking and laughing, occasionally stealing kisses from each other. As the night wore on and your eyelids grew heavy, his strong arms enveloped you, cocooning you as you drifted to sleep. Your mind wandered to the Merryment Festival, just days away, and a wave of longing washed over you. How bittersweet it was to have finally found your soulmate after years of searching, only to be separated by a thousand miles from your hometown festivities.

But then, an idea ignited in your mind: why not give Astarion a gift? It didn't have to be anything extravagant, just something simple yet meaningful. Something to honor the spirit of the festival and show Astarion that you cared for him.

The next morning, you awoke with a renewed sense of determination. The sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon, casting a warm glow through the small cracks in the tent. As Astarion peacefully meditated beside you, you carefully untangled yourself from the bedroll and tip-toed out into the brisk morning air. With a destination in mind, you set off towards the bustling Baldur's Gate town market, eager to find the perfect gift for Astarion. Amidst the rows of colorful stalls, you skimmed through an array of goods, admiring handcrafted trinkets and aromatic spices. The smells of fresh bread and exotic fruits mingled together, creating a tantalizing aroma that filled your senses. Each stall seemed to hold its own treasures, but you were determined to find something special for your companion.

Eventually, you stumbled upon a quaint stall adorned with exquisite, handcrafted jewelry. Your gaze was drawn to one unique piece in particular: a scarlet pendant that shimmered with a particular aura. As you approached, the stall owner, a strong half-orc woman, immediately noticed your interest.

"Ah, you have an eye for the unique, dear," she chimed in with a warm smile. "That is our special Bloodstone Pendant. Every piece is crafted from a drop of blood and imbued with powerful magic."

Your heart pounded in your chest as you picked up the piece, the stone cold against your fingers. A drop of blood...

"How is it made?" You found yourself asking.

The elderly woman's eyes twinkled as she explained. "A willing volunteer donates a bit of blood. That blood is then petrified through an ancient magical process only known to our kin. It's then shaped and set into the pendant akin to the one you now hold."

"And what makes it so unique?" you asked curiously.

"Every stone contains the emotions of its donor. When the holder touches it, they can experience those emotions as if they were their own. It's like carrying a piece of someone you love with you at all times."

Without any hesitation, you readily agreed to give a small sample of your blood. The half-orc woman smiled warmly at your eagerness and guided you to a small table in the rear of her stall. She arranged a vial and lancet on the table, ready to extract the needed blood. As she pierced your finger with the lancet, a sharp pain shot through your hand. But you ignored it as you watched the drops of blood fill the vial, mesmerized by its deep crimson color.

Once the vial was filled, the woman carefully sealed it and began working on shaping it into a pendant. You could feel a strange energy emanating from the stone as she worked, almost like it was pulsing with life.

Finally, the woman presented you with the finished product: a beautiful scarlet pendant with intricate designs etched into its surface.

"Thank you," you said with genuine gratitude, as you paid for the necklace. "This is perfect."

The woman smiled warmly at you. "It's my pleasure," she replied. "I hope it brings joy and love to whoever wears it."

The bustling market slowly faded into the background as you made your way back to camp, eager to give Astarion his gift. The pendant, nestled against your pocket, radiated warmth and seemed to hum with anticipation. As evening descended upon the camp, and you and Astarion settled in for the night, you reached out and took his hand in yours. He looked up at you with curious eyes.

"I have something for you," you said with a gentle smile, holding out a small velvet pouch to Astarion.

He raised an eyebrow inquisitively, taking the pouch from your hand. He opened it and his eyes widened in surprise as he saw the beautiful pendant inside. He held it in his hand, turning it over to examine it closely.

"What is this?" Astarion asked.

"It's a gift for you," you replied. "Happy Merryment Festival."

Astarion's lips curved into a genuine smile as he gazed at the necklace. "A blood pendant." he said.

You frowned slightly, "How did you know?"

"It reeks of your blood, darling." He brought it closer to his nose, inhaling deeply. "Though, what a lovely smell it is." His fingers gently traced the elegant patterns, his smile growing wider. "Thank you, I truly adore it," he said sincerely, his gaze meeting yours.

You watched him with a small smile, enjoying the peaceful moment before speaking.

"Now you will always have my blood with you, even if we are not close." you finally said.

"Is that so?" he murmured, reaching up to touch the pendant reverently. His eyes fluttered closed for a moment, and you could feel him experiencing your emotions as if they were his own. When his eyes finally opened again, they shone brightly in the dim light of their shared tent. "It's... remarkable."

"I'm glad you like it," you replied softly.

Astarion's gaze settled on you again, and before you could process what was happening, his lips were pressed against yours. The kiss started off soft and tender, but quickly grew heated as he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you in closer. You couldn't help but shiver as his fangs gently grazed your skin.

After a few moments, he pulled back slightly to catch his breath. His thumb gently brushed across your cheek as he stared into your eyes. "You truly are one of a kind," he whispered.

The two of you stayed in that position for a few moments, relishing the comfort of each other's company. Reluctantly, he broke away and seemed to fidget with nervousness.

"I- um." He cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I have something for you too."

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise.

"Really? You don't need to give me anything just because-"

He rolled his eyes as he tried to hide his nervousness with a cocky grin. "Come on, darling, humility is such an unnatractive trait. I know I don't have to, but I wanted to," he stated confidently. However, his hands shook slightly as he reached into his bag and retrieved a petite book, extending it towards you with eagerness. He whispered a "Happy Merryment Festival, or whatever" under his breath, trying to sound composed but failing to hide his true emotions.

Turning the small book over in your hands, your fingers graced the embossed title on the cover. It was a collection of poems, each page filled with graceful handwriting. Your eyes widened as you realized that the handwriting was Astarion's.

"These are... your poems?" You asked, your voice echoing with surprise and awe.

Astarion nodded again, looking slightly embarrassed now, but feigning nonchalance. "I have been compiling poetry over the years, just for the chance I would have someone deserving to gift them to. And now that I have someone... you who has so graciously been keeping my life interesting, I just couldn't pass up the opportunity."

You looked up at Astarion, your heart swelling with emotion. "They're beautiful," you whispered, flipping through the pages and absorbing each word. The pages were filled with beautiful handwritten verses, each one more passionate and lyrical than the last.

"Most were only written while I was in a particularly romantic mood, though some I wrote specifically for you."

His words made you heart stop. He had dedicated you a poem. No, he had dedicated you multiple poems. Each word poured from his soul onto the page, declaring his love in the most beautiful way. As you read them, tears pooled in your eyes, moved beyond words.

"This is... I'm..." Your voice faltered as you struggled to find the right words. "I can't believe you wrote all of these," you finally managed to choked out between sobs, unable to contain the overwhelming joy and love in your heart. The pages felt like a treasure.

"Well, I have been around for quite some time," Astarion quipped with a smirk, trying to lighten the mood.

But his attempt at humor only made you cry harder. With a sigh, he wrapped his arms around you and soothed your back with gentle caresses. After some time, your tears began to subside and you pulled back slightly to meet his gaze. "Thank you, Astarion. This is the best gift I have ever received," you said sincerely, feeling your heart swell with love for him. And this time, you knew he could feel it too, through the pendant.

He gave you a soft smile and kissed your forehead. "Anything for my dear Merryment companion."

[yourfavoritewitchbitch]

Chapter 3 - To Have and To Hold

A Mafia!Steve Harrington AU (featuring Mafia!Eddie Munson)

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Masterlist

Chapter Summary: Weddings should be joyous occasions but the union of two families only brings about distant memories and yearning for a life that could have been. Stolen glances and longing stares across the room, and finally finding yourself face to face with the one person who can change the future.

18+ Only! Minors DNI! (Future smut and mature themes!)

CW: Minimal use of Y/N. Reader is referred to as "Dove." Pet names. Slow burn. Exes to lovers. Mutual pining. Angst. Lots of tension. Spousal abuse - reader is assaulted and choked.

WC: 5.9K

Days at the gallery quickly turned into long nights. Sometimes not going home until the wee hours of the morning. After the last few interactions with Nik you decided it was best to avoid him altogether.

He'd never set foot in here, for which you were grateful. It was your own oasis from a life that was suddenly so stifling, drowning you without a life preserver in sight.

It was easy enough, the two of you had been sleeping in separate bedrooms for a couple of years now.

You would rather take an acid bath than let him touch you. Sex became completely non-existent when he'd started coming home with lipstick stained collars and trying to push himself onto you knowing he'd just fucked God knows who else, any illusion of a loving, dedicated husband completely dissolved.

You hadn't seen or heard from Steve since the day he'd bought that painting. You found yourself wondering where he might have hung it. It was one of your favorites and knowing it went to a good home warmed your heart.

Abigail knocked you from your current train of thought when she walked over to you with a massive bouquet of white roses.

“Mrs. Petrov, these were just delivered for you, though the card says Ms. Alexander. An old client perhaps?” You shifted the flowers from her arms as she spoke, their delicate scent faintly surrounding you.

“Thank you.” You called out, already heading to your office.

You gently laid them down on the desk, plucking the card from between the soft petals.

You couldn't help the smile that crept across your face as you opened it to read the contents, already suspecting who they were from. No one else in this town would dare use your surname anymore.

Passed the flower shop and thought of you. Hope they brighten your day.

S.H.

You immediately looked for an empty vase in the storage closet to display them on your desk, hiding the card away in the bottom drawer.

It wasn't unusual for clients to send you flowers from time to time, so it didn't seem out of the ordinary.

Much to your delight, it didn't stop there. A fresh bouquet was delivered every few days from that point forward. Not just roses, something unique each time all accompanied with a personalized note signed S.H.

His small way of showing you he was still here while reluctantly maintaining his distance.

For two weeks the flowers and notes never ceased but you still hadn't seen Steve.

There was a wedding slated for the weekend between two prominent families that you had to attend.

Finding yourself in need of a new dress, you were browsing the brightly lit showroom, admiring a very beautiful lilac colored floor length gown in the corner when he spoke.

“That's not your color. Much too pale. What about that one?” You rolled your eyes as he pointed to a deep red, lacey, eye-catching number across the store.

“It's for a wedding, Steven. The attention shouldn't be on me.” You quipped. “And that shows far too much skin.” Turning away, as you began to rummage through a few dresses on the rack.

“If you say so, but you're the only one I'll be looking at.” You stopped, hands stilling on the silk in front of you as you processed his words.

“You're going Saturday?” Managing to squeak out, despite the sudden lump in your throat.

It shouldn't really come as a surprise. All of the big named families had been invited. Maybe you were expecting Steve to be more like Richard in that regard. Send his well wishes but decline the invitation.

“Of course, Dove. Can't miss the wedding of the century. A Gambino marrying a Stratori? It's unheard-of.” He made a mock gasping sound that made you snort a small laugh.

“You should have seen the looks at my…” trailing off when you realized what you were about to say. It wasn't so long ago an Alexander marrying a Petrov was big news.

“Anyway, doesn't matter. I won't be going if I don't find something to wear.” Quickly changing the subject back to the matter at hand.

“Trust me, you'll look good in anything. Wear a potato sack and you’ll still be the most beautiful woman there.” His doting words and simple praises never let up when he was around you.

Your soft blushing and sweet smiles only encouraged him further, reminding him of the younger versions of you both. These moments he would hang onto for forever if need be.

You stared at him a moment, the way the sun filtering through the window cast a glow around him, appearing almost ethereal. His skin tanned by an Italian sun, making his freckles and moles only more prominent. Those same ones you would trace across his back, finding the constellations hidden within.

Your lips twitched at the thought of kissing those same marks, as a deeper blush crept your cheeks that had you quickly looking back to the dresses laid out before you, clearing your throat.

“Steve, I…” Mouth snapping closed when you weren't sure what you were attempting to say.

“What is it, tesoro?” Looking back at you expectantly, eyes soft, giving you his full attention.

“Thank you for the flowers. They're lovely, all of them, but you don't have to do that.” Your gaze drops momentarily as he regards you for a moment.

“Let me ask you something. Do they make you smile?”

“Well, of course.” A grin lifting the edges of your mouth you couldn't contain.

“Then yes, Dove. I have to send them. At least I know for one fleeting moment of the day I've had the pleasure of making you smile.”

You both stilled for a moment, silently gazing at one another.

“Excuse me? Can I help either of you?” One of the associates had walked over, interrupting the small moment.

You smiled at her, asking for a couple of dresses to try on in your size.

“Right away, Mrs. Petrov. And for you sir?” Looking back toward Steve, eyeing him up and down as she spoke. A small scowl of contempt passed over her momentarily, oblivious to who she was speaking to.

“Nothing for me today, thank you. I'll see myself out, momentarily.”

She nodded and walked toward the back to gather the dresses you had asked for.

“I suppose I'll see you tomorrow then.” Finally looking back to him, reluctantly getting ready to take your leave and follow her into the dressing room.

“Of course, Dove.” He says, leaning in close. “I still think the red would be a better choice.” Voice dropping an octave lower, winking as a shameless grin spread across his face.

His persistence had you fondly rolling your eyes, but a grin matching his own spread across your features.

“I think I'll find something a little less salacious but thank you for the suggestion.” Laughing as you walked away, a sound that was like music to his ears as he took his leave.

You glanced back once more, as you reached the back, but he was already gone.

The associate had gotten a large, very well-lit room ready for you. The dresses you had asked for were already on display, hung up across the back wall as you entered.

“This should be all of them. Will there be anything else Mrs. Petrov? Shall I stay and help you try any of them on?” She asked kindly.

“That won’t be necessary but thank you.”

The door clicked shut behind her, leaving you alone with some of the fanciest garments that money could buy yet you stood there feeling hollow, sighing deeply to yourself.

You slid the first dress from its silk hanger. A lilac gown with beautifully beaded detail on the bodice. Once you had managed to get it on, you stood in front of the mirror with a grimace. Steve was right, it was much too pale. You hated that he was right. A man who barely knows you anymore and still knows too much.

It was much the same as you tried on each one of the expensive gowns. None of them seemed quite right. Either the color was off, or it didn’t fit quite right leaving you empty handed on the way out.

Later that afternoon, the sun was setting low, as you worked through a few things before you would reluctantly head home for the evening.

Abigail enthusiastically walked toward you with a large black box, wrapped with a red, silk ribbon and a large matching bow on top.

“Mrs. Petrov, this was just delivered for you. It's from Figueroa.”

The dress shop you had visited earlier in the day. Confusion spread across your face, as you took it from her opting to open it in your office and dismissing her for the day.

You gently lifted the edges, immediately met with matching red tissue paper and a small, white card that simply read: This was ALWAYS your color. See you tomorrow.

You pushed aside the wrapping to reveal a deep, burgundy colored gown held within. The material was a beautiful velvet, soft to the touch, letting your fingers melt into the fabric as you pulled it from the box. It was stunning. A mermaid cut, with long sleeves dropped for the sweetheart neckline that would show some cleavage. It was sexy yet stayed somewhat moderate.

You didn't remember seeing this one in the store because it would have surely caught your eye.

Steve always had good taste. It came as no surprise he chose something that you would have picked out for yourself.

You hid the card in the desk, amongst the ones that have accompanied the flowers, hiding away any evidence of where the dress had come from. Your insides twisted at the thought of hiding him away forever. It was never meant to be this way with Steve.

You gripped the edges of the box on the ride home with a permanent smile etched across your face at the thought of seeing him tomorrow, if only for a brief moment, you would be the one to make him smile.

You sat in silence, staring out the window, ignoring the grunts and protests from Nik.

“I shouldn't even be going to this stupid wedding. I've got shit to do at the club tonight.” Huffing out like a petulant child, pushing his back further into the seat.

You simply rolled your eyes and tried to picture yourself literally anywhere else. The thought of spending the entire evening by his side turned your stomach. All dolled up to be HIS arm candy, but it would be your secret who you were dressed FOR.

“Hey, are you going to talk to me? You've got to play the part sometime tonight.” He grabbed for your hand, but you swiftly moved away from his touch at the faintest brush.

“I'll play along in public, but do not fucking touch me when we are alone. I don't know where your filthy hands have been. Or who they've been in, for that matter.” You spat, already over his behavior.

He let out a deep, hearty laugh, throwing his head back.

“Someone is feisty. I like it.” Grabbing your knee, laughing once again when you pushed him away. “Oh, come on baby. Give us a kiss.”

“Fuck off, Nik.” You hissed.

“Don't worry, sweetheart. The feeling is mutual.” He straightened back up in his seat, promptly lighting a cigarette, blowing the smoke your way.

“Do you mind? I don't want to smell like smoke before we get there.” Waving it away from you and your face, letting out a small cough.

“Aw, don't want your new dress to smell like smoke?” He chuckled, pinching the fabric at your side. “Poor baby.”

Your hand tightened around the clutch you held in your lap, as you closed your eyes holding back your anger as best you could, seething just below the surface. You just had to get through a couple of hours, saying pleasantries and having lighthearted conversation while rubbing a few elbows with certain people.

Calming your nerves as best you could, taking a few deep breaths and slowly opening your eyes once more.

Nik was distracted on his phone, leaving you for a few moments of peace before you pulled up to the venue.

The driver came around to open his door first, but Nik made no attempt to come around to your side to let you out, making the driver go around to open your door as well. A real gentleman.

“Let's get this over with. I've got shit to do.” Finally coming to stand beside you, extending his elbow for you to take.

“You've already said that.” You hissed, reluctantly taking his arm as you headed toward the entrance. “Just fucking behave Nik, you can't act like an ass in front people tonight.”

As much as you hated your husband, he still had a portion of business to uphold with many of the attendees tonight. Your father's reputation was at stake just being associated with the prick.

“I'll do as I damn well please.” He hissed back through gritted teeth, glaring down at you as you entered the large room. Ignoring him, you will yourself to throw on the best fake smile that you could muster.

The wedding was being held downtown, at one of the oldest buildings. Its gothic architecture and high ceilings were a beautiful backdrop for a wedding.

Nik made a beeline for some of his associates, immediately grabbing some champagne from one of the waitresses as he pulled you along. It didn’t go unnoticed the way he so blatantly eyed her up and down as he passed.

You busied yourself looking around at the decor, sipping your own champagne trying to ignore the conversation he was having around you. Some things you couldn’t understand at all as he spoke in his native tongue. When you had first gotten married you took an interest in learning Russian but that quickly subsided as your marriage started falling apart.

The room quieted down to a dull murmur when he entered. His very presence commanded the attention of everyone present. Heads began to turn his way, all clambering to catch a glimpse of the so-called prodigal son of Richard Harrington as he made his entrance, his first public outing since the funeral.

He ignored the hushed whispers around him, walking in with Eddie falling right in behind him, the crowd parting as he made his way to pay respect to the happy couple.

He looked as handsome as ever sporting a black suit, with his hair slicked back and quaffed perfectly but his burgundy shirt and tie beneath his buttoned suit jacket is what really caught your eye. It was the exact color of your dress. A detail that brought a small smile to your face.

“Who the hell does he think he is?” Nik scoffed, as some of the other men chuckled, pulling your attention back to the small group.

He downed the rest of his champagne, eyes never leaving Steve, following his movements across the crowded space.

“I need something a little more stiff, come on.” He grabbed your arm, pushing his way through the crowd to get to the bar, dragging you along beside him. The abruptness caught you off guard. For a moment, you wabbled on your heels.

“Nik, you need to take it easy tonight.” You whispered through gritted teeth.

“And you,” he hissed. “Should shut the fuck up.” He gripped your arm a little tighter as you reached the bar tucked away in the corner before ordering a bourbon, downing it in one gulp, slamming the glass back down. He would never outwardly push it out in the open like this, showing his true colors but it was surprising, nonetheless.

He finally relinquished his grip to grab his next one, turning to meet his associates as they began to huddle around him, picking up their conversations from before leaving him to ignore you once more.

Steve spotted you as soon as he walked through the door, smirking to himself. The dress he had picked out fit you spectacularly, showing off your curves while staying somewhat modest. You were breathtaking.

Reluctantly, his attention drew back to the matter at hand as he made his way through the crowd to greet the wedding party and their family, wishing them the best.

Steve quickly made his rounds, shaking hands and chatting with some familiar faces or some new introducing themselves, but he couldn't keep his eyes off of you.

He and Eddie grabbed some flutes of champagne, chatting amongst themselves in the corner where he temporarily lost you in the crowd, but quickly caught up with you again heading toward the bar with Nik.

His jaw ticked seeing the way he gripped you, pulling you alongside him.

Eddie noticed how he stiffened, following his line of vision over to you just in time for them both to witness his hold on you grow a little more harsh.

Steve took a step before Eddie moved abruptly in front of him, halting him with a palm to his chest.

“Steve. Not here.” Eddie warned, as he looked past him once more. You had already moved away from Nik, standing to the side of the bar.

Eddie was right. This was not the time or place to lose his head, but it didn't mean they couldn't have a little chat.

You heard him before you saw him, heart promptly leaping into your throat when you realized he was headed in your direction, but he only caught your gaze nodding slightly and greeted Nik instead.

Realizing you could do nothing but stand there and watch as the scene unfolds, you downed the rest of your champagne bracing for the worst.

“Nik, gentlemen. How are we all doing this evening?” Asking with that charming Harrington tone, as Eddie hung slightly behind them, hands in his pockets, looking relaxed but you could tell he was anything but.

Nik’s amusement seemed to fade, his smile dropping, moving the glass to his lips for another sip. He stood up a little straighter, squaring his shoulders to the other man.

“Harrington.” Nodding back, as the others stated their own greetings.

“Didn't expect you to show up here. Your father never came to shit like this.” He sneered.

“Well, little Niki, like I told you the other day, we aren't our fathers. And I, for one, am striving to be a better man than he was. We should all strive to be better men, right?” Leveling his gaze right at your husband as he spoke.

A flash of anger split Nik's face before regaining his composure, already a little too much to drink to effectively conceal his emotions. The nickname he gained in his youth that he had come to detest, trying to live up to the elder Nikolai, his father, always falling in his shadow. Something that he and Steve had in common however they chose very different avenues to deal with it.

“Right.” Scoffing, as he set his glass back to the bar, taking a small step toward Steve, once again squaring his shoulders. “Any suggestions on how I should go about that, since you're doling out the advice today? I'm all ears.”

“I don't know, Nik. Maybe the old ways of handling business are outdated? Kind of like, oh I don't know?” Pausing, pretending to think for a moment. “Raising a hand to your spouse to keep them in line? That shit just doesn't work and makes you look bad.”

Your cheeks suddenly heated at the bluntness of his insinuation, hoping no one looked over at you.

“And what the fuck would you know about business? Last time I checked, you were still riding daddy's coattails.” Leaning further into Steve’s space as he spoke trying to make himself more intimidating, but he stood his ground, not so easily dissuaded.

Eddie made to move forward, but Steve quickly held a hand out, halting him.

Nik's raised voice began garnering a little attention their way as you scanned the other guests standing close by.

“I'm just saying.” Taking a step toward Nik this time, both men practically nose to nose. “Sometimes it's better to get with the program, or you could lose everything.”

“Are you threatening me?” Nik spat.

Steve let out a small chuckle, shaking his head as he stepped back, reminding himself once more that he couldn’t lose it here.

“Trust me, you would know if it's a threat. Just some friendly advice.” He clapped him on the arm as if they were old chums, sharing a good laugh which only infuriated Nik further.

“You can take your friendly advice and shove it u…” One of Nik's associates got in between the two and tried to calm him down. Steve was trying to goad him to gauge his reaction and he had taken the bait flawlessly.

“Well, gentlemen if you'll excuse me, we are here for a wedding after all.” He nodded, as he and Eddie headed back across the room, leaving you a little speechless in the process.

“I don't know who the fuck he thinks he is.” Nik began to rant, so you decided to leave him and make your way to your chair for the ceremony. You also hoped he would cool off before coming to find you as other guests began to fill the empty seats around you.

You caught Steve out of the corner of your eye as he passed, taking a seat across the aisle, one row up on the end.

The ceremony was beautiful with a blushing young bride and a handsome groom. They seemed genuinely happy and for their sakes you hoped it were true.

You couldn't help but feel sadness now thinking back to your own wedding. The joy and hopefulness that day brought only to be a complete fabrication.

As the couple said their vows, your eyes found his across the aisle, as if he had already been looking toward you. There seemed to be a sadness etched within him as well, his eyes lacking their usual sparkle.

Images flashed and danced through your mind of a life that could have been. A fall wedding, surrounded by your closest friends and family. Honeymooning on the Italian coast and coming back to a home full of love and promise without any doubts.

Steve would have given you the world without any hesitation. He loved fiercely, willing to do whatever it took to make you happy. He made it so damn easy to see what a bright future lay ahead for both of you.

You hadn't noticed a tear escaping until it rolled down your cheek, and onto your hand situated in your lap, suddenly bringing you crashing back to reality.

He was still looking at you when you diverted your gaze away, because it was all too much. Your chest ached as the couple kissed, concluding their vows and made their way down the aisle, now united in holy matrimony with smiles gracing their happy faces. It was suddenly too suffocating.

“I have to go to the restroom.” Excusing yourself from Nik’s side, not waiting for his response, quickly dashing out the side door into the empty hallway.

You breathed a small sigh of relief, briefly pausing, your hand leaning against the wall to steady yourself and regain some composure.

You willed yourself to conceal your emotions as you began to make your way down the corridor but as you rounded the corner someone grabbed your forearm. Your back was suddenly met with a warm chest, taking you by surprise. Their large hand clasping over your mouth stifling any noise from escaping you, as they step further back with you in tow, closing the door.

Before you had time to react, his soothing voice washed over you.

“It's okay, Dove. It's just me.” His lips so close, ghosting the shell of your ear as he spoke. He waited a moment for it to register before he removed his hand from your face, finding the light switch.

“Steve! What the hell?” Saying as you swung around to face him, your pulse racing from the small scare. He had pulled you into a small, dimly lit utility closet, away from prying eyes and just big enough for the two of you.

“I'm sorry, honey it's the only place I could get you alone.” He shrugged, shifting toward you, with a small pout.

“I shouldn't be in here.” You reached for the handle, but he was quick to place his hand overtop yours, effectively halting your movement.

“I couldn't let you leave without telling you how beautiful you look.” He whispered, closing the small gap between you, his hand coming to rest on your hip, heat radiating from his palm. His touch was searing, even through the fabric of your gown.

“I saw this on the way out of the shop and had them match the shirt and tie perfectly.” He inches just a little more into your space, releasing the hold on your hand so he could plant it firmly to your lower back pushing you further into him.

Your hands find the expanse of his chest, holding yourself steady, feeling as though your knees could give out at any moment. He had unbuttoned his suit jacket, your palms finding the warmth beneath, flat against his silk shirt.

He didn't need to utter it aloud. The dress. The tie. It was his way of subtly staking claim to you. You were and always had been his.

“Steve, what are you doing? You can't exactly woo a married woman. Especially one married to someone as powerful as Nik. He…” You stopped, when you saw the look in his eyes, utterly and completely gone for you.

“I don't have to woo what's already mine.” His voice low and husky, dripping with desire.

“That’s very presumptuous of you, Mr. Harrington.” You breathed out, trying to maintain your cool but even you could hear the waiver in your voice.

No matter the distance or time, you couldn't forget this man no matter how hard you tried. He would simply not let you. It felt like torture to be this close to him now, yet so far away.

Your head kept telling you that you needed to run, but you couldn't find it in yourself to move. You were transfixed, gazing up into his golden, mossy framed orbs.

You let your eyes trail his features. A small scar above his left eyebrow that had been there for years, a memento of his childhood. The way his lips had the perfect cupid's bow and remembering just the way he tastes.

He leans down looking for any sign of trepidation, finding none; your face mirroring his own, full of unspoken adoration.

“You're not denying it, tesoro. Just tell me you want this, as much as I do.” His nose traces down the slope of yours as he speaks. Your heart hammering so hard in your chest, you were sure he could hear it beating.

“Amore mio.” You whisper, top lip grazing his, releasing a shuddering breath before the realization of what you'd just said fully hit.

You'd never spoken those simple words to anyone else, only ever reserved for Steve. He had taught you some phrases in Italian, mostly sweet talk. You were always his tesoro mio and he, your amore mio.

You lean back, clasping a hand over your mouth as he was fully leaning in, eyes closed, lips chasing yours.

“Oh my God!” You gasp out, pressing yourself backward, stumbling a bit in your heels but he catches your elbow as you regain your balance.

“Dove?” He asks, voice low, coming out a little timidly.

“I… We can't do this Steve!” He can see your internal conflict and what he can only infer as fear written all over your face. It dawns on him then. The way you had winced when he grabbed your arm at the gallery. The way Nik had pulled you through the room earlier.

“Dove, did he hurt you?” His hand on your elbow begins to draw you back in, laying his other to your jaw, coaxing your face toward him but you still refuse to look up, eyes cast downward.

“No, Steve. You just… you don't know what he's capable of.” Your eyes grow glossy, tears threatening to spill over your lashes and ruining your makeup.

“Hey, honey, I'm not worried about him.” He does his best to soothe you, speaking softly. “If anyone should be worried, it's him. You hear me? Look at me.” Gently, his thumb grazes your bottom lip.

“Dove, look at me.” Pleading one last time, his voice was raw and pained.

“Steve, I can't…” Your eyes finally meet his, tears spilling out and down your cheeks. He does his best to wipe them away when his hands come to cup your cheeks. “I…I’m sor…”

“Shhh… no need for that, tesoro mio.” He doesn't want to let you go, but he's afraid of pushing you further away.

He leans in, warm lips press into your forehead as your eyes close. A tender embrace, your hand coming to grip his wrist holding him in place for a moment longer before quietly slipping from his hold.

You wipe your tears, pausing with your hand on the handle, looking back over your shoulder at him.

“It's better if you stay away from me.” Whispering out without waiting for a reply, quickly opening the door and checking the hall before stepping out. Your footsteps are the only sound echoing down the corridor as you walk toward the restroom to clean yourself up.

The interaction only lasted a few minutes, but the feeling of his hands and lips still lingered on your skin.

“It's better if you stay away from me.”

He blows out a deep breath but doesn't say anything.

Better for who? He bitterly thinks. Certainly not better for him. You're all he's thought about since returning. It's driving him insane.

He can't bring himself to think about you with Nik. The asshole getting to have you all to himself. He can touch, kiss or bed you anytime he pleases. The thought makes him sick, but the brief interaction solidifies what he already knew to be true.

When he heard “amore mio” glide past your lips so easily, he knew he still had you. His heart ached to hear you say that just once more, something he hadn't heard uttered in so long, nearly taking his breath away. You're still his.

He waits a few more moments, letting you get ahead of him before he makes sure the coast is clear and exits the closet.

Heading in the opposite direction and rounding the corner, he spots Eddie leaning against the wall smirking at him.

“Everything okay, boss?” His grin drops, shoving himself off the wall seeing the annoyed look plastered to Steve's face. Not what he had expected.

“No, but it will be. We're leaving.” Grunting out as he continues to walk, leaving Eddie to catch up to his stride.

You stared at your reflection in the mirror, wiping the makeup that had run. It took a few minutes, but you made yourself presentable.

Nik was waiting for you right outside the bathroom, crossing his arms giving you a death glare when you spotted him.

“What the hell have you been doing?” He hissed.

“I had to pee, and the wedding made me emotional, so I cleaned myself up. I can't go to the reception looking like a mess.” Responding, as you headed past him, but he grabbed your arm. The one he's so fond to take here lately when you get out of line.

“We're going home.” He spat, getting in your face for a moment before a cruel smile stretched across his face as his whole demeanor changed.

“Kitten, I know you're tired, it's been a long hard day.” Ushering you out into the reception area, pulling you through the crowd toward the exit, holding tightly to your wrist as if you would try to flee at any moment.

The car was already waiting outside, as he ushered you inside and slammed the door. You held your breath when he sat down beside you and began to loosen his tie, unbuttoning the restricting collar.

Silence for a few moments as you head back home to your prison.

“Do you think I'm fucking stupid?” He finally asks, turning his head slowly toward you.

“Wh– What?” You asked meekly, shrinking into yourself.

“I asked if you think I'm fucking stupid?” Enunciating each word a little slower and more clipped.

You furrowed your brow, trying to decipher where he was going. Had he seen you and Steve exit the closet?

“Where'd the dress come from?”

“My dress?” You tried to stay calm, looking down at the velvet fabric. He'd put those small crumbs together.

“The dress Y/N. That fucker bought it for you, didn't he? Didn't think I'd notice his goddamn matching shirt and tie? You two think you're really cute.” He clenched his fists on his lap, as his jaw ticked. He was anything but calm right now and the dam was about to burst.

“Nik… I…” He suddenly lunged at you, hand around your throat pushing you back into the seat. You gasped out in surprise, as he pressed in just a little harder, fingers flexing and cutting off your air supply. Your hand flew up to clutch at his, grasping and desperately trying to pry him away.

He leaned in close, gritting his teeth as he spoke.

“Its like you want me the fucking hurt you, leaving me no choice. Pull a stunt like that again, and not even your father will be able to protect you.”

He eases back, placing a chaste kiss to your temple before releasing his hold on you. Your airway opened, leaving you gasping in a heavy breath while letting out a small, choked sob.

“I warned you.” His last words for the evening, before lighting a cigarette and thoroughly ignoring you, taking a phone call leaving you to sulk in the corner.

He dropped you off at home, no doubt heading to his club, but you were grateful to be left alone for the night hoping for some miracle that he wouldn’t come back home at all.

You drew yourself a hot bath, letting the magnitude of everything that had transpired wash over you.

The wedding brought up so many morose thoughts and feelings. Steve blatantly threatening Nik, Nik threatening you, it was all too much.

Your fingertips graze your cheek where his hand had been not long ago. If you closed your eyes, you could feel him still, imaging he was here with you. His touch had electrified you. Something you had never felt with anyone else. A feeling of being totally alive. The gray, dreary past melting and giving way to a future full of bright color.

“Steve.” You whispered out, pulling your knees into your chest, as you cried.

Lying to yourself would be useless. Steve was everything that Nik never was or would be. Years apart and he still holds your heart. You were still in love with him, just knowing he felt the same was all you needed.

You had to think of a plan, while still trying to maintain your distance until Nik was out of the picture.

This was a very dangerous game, but you couldn't bear the thought of letting him go a second time.

No, you wouldn't let that happen this time.

Taglist: @micheledawn1975 @girlwiththerubyslippers @thecreelhouse @teen--marvel @taccobelle

Let me know if you would like to be tagged!

[cerastes]

Specter: "Have you seen Swordfish? I had some questions regarding the roster for the deployment tomorrow, best to get those inquiries done and settled before showtime, and all that."

Skadi: "I think I saw her with doctor Kal'tsit, they were going towards the dormitories together... Probably her room."

Specter: "Oh, wonderful, then I get to ask the two head honchos about it instead of just the left side of the brain, should make matters more simple."

Skadi: "Hey, now, wait a second, Laurentina. I said to slow down. Surely you don't mean to interrupt them?"

Specter: "Interrupt what? A strategic meeting? I dare think I have a voice in such sundry matters as much as anyone who is ordered to take cannonfire to the face in her duties on a nigh daily basis. The value I can add to any given conversation is not to be understated, my little Orca."

Skadi: "I'd consider that a complaint, where it to come from the mouth of anyone except you, Shark. But seriously, think about it a little... The two of them, alone, not in any of the meeting rooms or the offices, but rather in the dormitories. You can add those twos together with ease."

Specter: "Surely you jest, Orca? Are you suggesting that I could be so uncouth as to intentionally, naively, brazenly sling open the doors to the realm of intimacy between two entangled, probably very sweaty souls? Non-sense! I so confidently stride because I know that's not even a possibility!"

Skadi: "Elaborate. And seriously, slow down."

Specter: "Those two old wells haven't seen a trickle of moisture in years, I'd reckon. They are all-business, no non-sense, well oiled chaste tactical machines! Young, dumb and full of cum? Try old, cold, and full of mold! And I love them so, but let us be real for a microsecond, my little Orca, can you truly picture Swordfish and Miss Kal'tsit doing the Sargon Speedbump? Or the Laterano Excommunication? Perro Style? Get real, dearest, they are more likely to be playing checkers than they are to be making Bolivar Pancakes in there. And she's absolutely in there, reeks of that seawater with a tinge of warmth so characteristic of her behind this door."

Skadi: "First of all, never say any of those words ever again, but you're right, it smells like the Captain in there. There, past that door, with a plaque that very clearly reads 'Kal'tsit'. Let's, perhaps, mind our own business and just field your questions tomorrow early."

Specter: "You truly are insistent on these fantasies of yours, Skadi! It's so cute and endearing how you think that could even be possible! Ahem... Pardon, Swordfish, Miss Kal'tsit, I've got some inquiries regarding tomorrow's sortie that I was hoping to--"

*Specter opens the door and has a full frontal VIP seat peep at Gladiia running her hands deep inside of Kal'tsit's dress, half-lidded red eyes staring back at the intruding shark, straddling the doctor with her lithe yet strong frame, a cougar that's not yet had enough of its meal. The silence is filled only by greedy little gasps seeking to oxygenate two hearts that have very clearly not have had enough of each other just yet, an almost primal hunger in the two pairs of eyes that glared guillotines at the interloper, deafeningly silent yet clearly inquisitive as the trails of saliva that connected their lips lost its tension and threatened to snap*

Specter:

Skadi: "Hm. So, I tried to warn her, but--"

Specter: "Orca, look! Isn't it gallant, isn't it inspiring? Swordfish is hard at work, making a younger sibling for me! Oh, how splendid!"

Skadi: "LAURENTINA!"

Specter: "Oh, how simply joyous! Observe! Swordfish fully intends to cultivate that moist, fertile delta, and from it shall life spring! Orca, we'll care for a brave new Hunter soon, we must be on our best behavior and be good influ--"

Skadi: "With your pardon!"

*Skadi secures the interloping shark with a deft armlock and beats a hasty yet perfectly gallant retreat, closing the door behind her in such a hurry that the entirety of the landship shook. Many a Messenger on-board would remember this as the Localized Earthquake of 1099, which would go on to prompt emergency preparations for a sudden Catastrophe overnight, but that is a story for another time. Back in the dormitory room, as the younger Hunters exfiltrated themselves from the battlefield that was that room, after a cautionary yet eternal few minutes of silence and stillness, just in case that door decided to open again, the senior Hunter dismounted the doctor.*

Kal'tsit: "...Well? So what was that about?"

Gladiia: "My sincere apologies, Dame Kal'tsit, and you have my gratitude for having gone along with my drastic, sudden strategy."

Kal'tsit: "Don't worry about it. So?"

*Gladiia nods and, from a little corner behind Kal'tsit's bedside cupboard, carefully drags out a small table with a checkers board on it. The game is clearly quite progressed, with one side having a clear advantage.*

Gladiia: "I did not want Shark to see me, as some land-dwellers would put it, 'getting bodied' so badly in this showdown of ours."

Kal'tsit: "Because she would never let you hear the end of it?"

Gladiia: "Not for a couple of lifetimes, no."

Kal'tsit: "You have my sympathy and understanding, don't worry about it. Now..."

Gladiia: "...Yes. It's about time I reverse my fortune. Ready yourself, Dame Kal'tsit."

*Kal'tsit then proceeded to win the next game, as she did the previous seven, and they played lots more checkers afterwards*

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 9/10/2024

someone adopt this little orange man from me in Houston TX! more details here!

listening

the 1991 Ella Mae Morse compilation Capitol Collectors Series is the official driving-cats-to-the-vet album bc it is so mellow but still fun. this album has previously been featured several times in tuesdayposts but i think you should all listen to it again.

seven thousand three hundred days IS a long long time to sleep ur so right ella

-

reading

two different works that annoyed me: Emily Hamilton's The Stars Too Fondly. my first clue should have been that this is my least favorite poem, bc ppl would quote it to me smugly after my mom died. im sure they thought they were being so super comforting to a budding astronomer, but, much like how i can no longer eat lasagna bc ppl gave us Twenty! Party! Size! Platters! Of! Lasagna! after my mom died (they would just Appear on our front porch, frozen), too much of this poem really soured me.

i had this book on hold Forever and then delayed delivery twice bc i have not felt like reading lately. here's the publisher's description:

In her breathtaking debut—part space odyssey, part sapphic rom-com—Emily Hamilton weaves a suspenseful, charming, and irresistibly joyous tale of fierce friendship, improbable love, and wonder as vast as the universe itself. So, here’s the thing: Cleo and her friends really, truly didn’t mean to steal this spaceship. They just wanted to know why, twenty years ago, the entire Providence crew vanished without a trace. But then the stupid dark matter engine started all on its own, and now these four twenty-somethings are en route to Proxima Centauri, unable to turn around, and being harangued by a snarky hologram that has the face and attitude of the ship’s missing captain, Billie. Cleo has dreamt of being an astronaut all her life, and Earth is kind of a lost cause at this point, so this should be one of those blessings in disguise that people talk about. But as the ship gets deeper into space, the laws of physics start twisting, old mysteries come crawling back to life, and Cleo’s initially combative relationship with Billie turns into something deeper and more desperate than either woman was prepared for. Lying somewhere in the subspace between science fantasy and sapphic rom-com, The Stars Too Fondly is a soaring near-future adventure about dark matter and alternate dimensions, leaving home and finding family, and the galaxy-saving power of letting yourself love and be loved.

should be catnip for me, right? wrong. starts out as a chat fic, which i hate.

i had a lot of trouble finishing the first chapter, which also has an extended third-person omniscient narrator flashback in italics, a thing i also hate. i KNOW you can figure out how to integrate this information into the book in a better way instead of dumping it in my lap.

i think part of why this is not hitting like i wanted is the tone, because i think this veers more new adult than i was really hoping for. i think introducing a big group all at once is very hard to do effectively. i do not like a series of character introductions that feel like they are trying to sell me action figures. or perhaps blind-bag figures. i do not like a six-deep list of cheesy puns about someone's name. i do not have the patience to see if this debut novel finds its footing a little later on, though i am glad a sapphic ghost in the machine romance exists in this world.

i also read dean motter's mister x (both the original late eighties through early nineties run and the 2008 follow-on).

let's yoink the description from wikipedia:

Set in Radiant City, a dystopian municipality influenced by Bauhaus and Fritz Lang's Metropolis, the series concerns a mysterious figure who purports to be its architect. His radical theories of "psychetecture" cause the citizenry to go mad, just as he did, and he takes on the mission to repair his creation. To accomplish this he remains awake twenty-four hours a day by means of the drug "insomnalin", all the while coping with a Dick Tracy–like rogues gallery and supporting cast including his long-suffering ex-girlfriend Mercedes. (ed note: the redhead in the santa beard below)

the art in this comic book is really and truly stunning. everyone was firing on all cylinders. beautiful retrofuturistic advertisement vibes, very fun play with panels and word balloons while still being readable, there are airships, you know how it is. looooooooove a hardboiled noir.

the Concept of mister x, this horrible awful futuristic city that grinds its citizenry up and spits them out? both figuratively and sometimes literally? love it!!! love a great wounded beast of a city as a character!!!

unforch the "who is mister x" subplot does not resolve in a satisfying way, imo. there's a lot of flip-flopping, there's a lot of options, he ends up being (maybe?) someone he was very definitively proven NOT to be in an earlier issue, and it really soured me on the whole experience. and also i don't believe it! that specific person makes no fucking sense! who mister x is, is by far the least interesting part of the series. tell me more about how he's fixing the city. show me more of the city. shut up and dance, robot artists

-

watching

X-Men: Apocalypse (2016, dir. Singer). this movie did not need to be two and a half hours long. appreciated the EXTREMELY divorced energy from charles & erik though, quicksilver rescuing the school scene was also very fun. my bestie's husband has informed me we are NOT watching Dark Phoenix, i'm not sure if we're going to loop back and watch the ??? number of wolverine films or if we're going to see how i feel about deadpool. bc i find this character insufferable through clips only.

-

playing

there is a feature in the video game genshin impact to turn your World Level (TM) down in order to make overworld enemies a little easier. i am at seven out of nine bc i genuinely can't finish the boss to unlock world level 9, and i am finding some of the overworld enemies too hard at 8 and want to finish the achievements in a more relaxed fashion.

-

making

this is going to be a lot of previously posted pics so bear with me.

saturday morning/saturday evening. plants? repotted. porch and stairs? swept. old wasp nests? knocked down. different mirror on the porch to go out to the curb when i have the energy? yes. also a giant slab of engineered stone from the top of a dresser but that's out of frame.

speaking of the giant broken dresser that was in my apartment when i moved in just over a year ago, i ripped it apart with a crowbar and threw it in the dumpster. put my pretty zebrawood desk in the empty space and started thinking about what to hang on that wall. the wall across from it is maps, bc i think a cozy office should have lots of maps and it makes a good video conference background. maybe this will be the dedicated cowboy nonsense wall. i did so much dusting and vacuuming and mopping and the girls can't even hang out in here bc the orange boy is in the office bathroom. big sigh.

also a lot of driving around and emailing and calling thirty shelters and rescues figuring out how to get this orange man a home. please take this orange man off my hands.

[purplefangirl42]

Three Goodbyes

Summary: Three times you said hello to Viktor, and three times you had to say goodbye.

Pairing: Viktor/Reader (GN)

A/N: This is a birthday gift for my friend @writingmysanity. My first and likely only time writing for Viktor, as I'm mostly a Silco girlie. Many thanks to @deny-the-issue for beta-reading!

Tags/Warnings: Angst, Pining, Acceptance

AO3 Link Divider by firefly-graphics

There were three times you had to say goodbye to Viktor, each time hurting more than the one before. Even with this pain, the joyous memory of your hello upon reuniting could never be tainted.

The first time you met him, you were both small children. He always sat on the sidelines, observing everything that happened around him rather than participating with the other children. It confused you at first until you gathered the courage to talk to him one day and discovered the truth. He almost seemed unbothered by the fact that he was viewed as different, telling you that he had accepted it long ago and since there was nothing he could do to change it, he chose to go along with the cards dealt to him by fate.

That mindset stood out to you and you decided on that day that you would forever cherish him as a friend, even if no one else would. The two of you spent many days together, Viktor explaining new things he had discovered in his observations of the world and you listening intently. Even when things kept you apart for longer periods of time, each time you found each other again, it was almost as if no time had passed at all. 

As you got older, you felt yourself drawn to the company of others more often. This unfortunately took you away from your time with Viktor. Even though he insisted that he didn’t mind, you could see a glimmer of pain hidden behind his eyes that you knew was not caused by any physical pain. It touched you deep in your heart, and you vowed to yourself that you would make an effort to carve out time for him. However, there came a time when it wasn’t you that no longer had time for your friendship.

During one of the last times you saw him as a child, Viktor ranted for a long time about the brilliant scientist he had met and the wonderful things he was learning. You were glad that he had something to occupy his time and the light that was shining in his eyes was worth the lack of quality time spent together.

The longer you went without seeing him, however, the stronger the pain in your heart. It had been nice to have him to yourself, even if that chain of thought seemed selfish. Thinking as a small child, you grew to resent him for having something that seemed ‘better’ than your company in his life. After enough time, you stopped making an effort. You no longer showed up at your regular meeting places. You no longer sought him out in the faces you came across. He had moved on without you and you decided to let him.

It was many years before you saw Viktor again. You had both grown and changed, but you knew him the moment you saw him. The spark of recognition in his eyes followed by the soft smile he gave you made your heart twinge with regret over how things had pulled you apart before. He seemed truly happy to see you.

He told you of how things had ended on a bad note with the scientist he had been associating with, but his love for science had not dwindled. He had been studying on his own, learning new things every day. The passion behind the way he talked about things and the eagerness to share it with you made you feel like you could feel the way you had as a child, as if the time apart had never happened. As if nothing had changed.

Things had changed, however. You were both blooming into different people, with different desires. Viktor wanted to continue his studies and move onto better things. You wanted to build a life together. In the time since you had reunited, you had learned to love him in a different way than you had as a child. While you hoped the feeling was mutual, you didn’t have the courage to pursue it. Every time he mentioned his plans to get away from this life and go Topside, you felt that selfish feeling creep into your heart once again. You didn’t want to share him.

The day Viktor got his acceptance to go to school topside, you tried your very best to be happy for him. You still hadn’t told him about your feelings, and now it seemed like you would never get the chance. Putting on a brave face, you congratulated him and helped him get ready to depart. The selfishness in your heart was overpowered by the love you had for him, wanting him to get what he wanted and to live a better life. If it had to be without you, so be it. You were ready to let him go again.

He bid you goodbye at the Undercity side of the bridge, giving you a gentle kiss on the cheek before slowly making his way to the other side. You watched from a distance as he disappeared, onto better things and a brighter future. Even though you had resolved to let him go, it still hurt much more than the last time he left your life. You hoped you would see him again, even if it came with the possibility of repeating that loss.

Too many years passed before you saw Viktor again. You had seen too much pain and suffering in that time and had decided to go through life alone. No lover, no friends, no family. Every day that passed, you remembered Viktor. His smile when he would discover something new, the way his eyes lit up when he shared it with you, or how his accent somehow got stronger the more excited he got about the knowledge he possessed. 

One day while musing over your memories of him, you caught a glimpse of someone hobbling down the street at a slow pace. While it wasn’t unusual for people to walk with a cane in the Undercity, something struck you as familiar when it came to this person. As they got closer, you realized who it was that was walking toward you. It was Viktor. 

You weren’t prepared for the swell of emotion that washed over you, both love and grief mixing together. You moved in the direction of the figure, calling out his name. He flinched away at first but once he realized who you were, he relaxed. Once you were able to see him up close, you felt a very different emotion build inside you, sadness.

Viktor looked unwell. The light had disappeared from his eyes, his face was haggard and thin, and something about him seemed unsteady. You had never seen Viktor as weak, admiring his perseverance in the face of what life had thrown at him. But, you could not call to mind any other word to describe his current state of being. Despite living Topside for so many years, it seemed he could not fully escape the effects of life in the Undercity.

You tried to ask how things were, questioning why he was down here instead of up at his fancy school. He dodged your questions, saying that he was on a mission and didn’t have time to talk. The pain must have shown in your expression, as he halted mid-sentence and gave you a half-hearted smile. He promised that once he had the resources and was feeling better, he would do everything he could to see you again. You simply nodded and pushed down the flicker of hope that ignited in your heart, trying to extinguish it before it grew into something that would only burn you.

Once again you watched him walk away, heading in the direction of where you knew that scientist he used to work with lived. While you hadn’t interacted with the man yourself, you had only heard bad things about him. Concern built within you, but you shook your head and walked away. Viktor knew what he was doing, he was smart. It wasn’t really any concern of yours anyways.

Despite your resolution to leave him to his own fate, you still found yourself camped out near the bridge. You wanted to be there when he crossed back over, wanted to make sure you got that last goodbye. There was some upheaval in regards to the bridge, access being closed and not allowing people to cross over, but you paid it no attention. Viktor was your only concern.

Eventually, you saw him approaching. He seemed in slightly better spirits, as if he had found something that would help his current state. Knowing what went on in the darker parts of the Undercity, you had a feeling that his solution couldn’t stem from anything good. However, the previous sentiment echoed in your mind. 

Viktor knew what he was doing.

You waved him down when he got close to you, calling out his name. He stopped at your side, leaning against the wall beside you. Not wanting to broach the subject of having to say goodbye again, you gestured to the chaos behind you on the bridge. Viktor seemed unconcerned, saying he would have no trouble getting across. Quickly, the subject was dismissed and you were left to sit in silence. 

Repeating his previous statement of not having time to talk and having important things to do, Viktor pushed off the wall to leave your side. He wobbled slightly, unsteady in his weakened state but quickly righted himself. Repeating his promise to see you again in the future, he reached out and lightly touched your hand.

You felt the words bubbling up inside you, a mixture of things you wanted to say but never could. Asking him not to leave, telling him of your feelings, pleading with him to take you with him. All you allowed to pass, however, was a goodbye. You waved at him as he turned and walked into the waiting crowd gathered on the bridge. 

You didn’t wait to watch him disappear like you had before, this hurt bad enough. If you had to look at him for much longer, you would have to fight the urge to go after him. You wouldn’t be able to fight that selfish feeling again. 

Deep in your heart, you knew there wouldn’t be another hello associated with a reunion. Even if he found a way to help with what ailed him, he was far too busy for the likes of you. Part of you wished that you had never reunited after the first goodbye, that you had never learned to love him again. He would just have been a distant childhood memory, not a constant source of pain.

You thought back to that little boy, sitting alone by the water, and wondered if Viktor himself ever thought about that time. About the person that came to sit at his side when he was thinking, listening to every word he said as if they were precious life-saving tidbits. You figured you would never know and decided that you had to be okay with that. 

No more hellos meant no more goodbyes. Three was more than enough.

A/N: Give this a like, comment, and reblog and let me know what you think!

[starmocha]

This is just a love letter to the devs, because they are not celebrated enough for their achievements and genuine love for the game and players.

With the recent announcement of the upcoming update and new love interest's debut, It's truly been amazing to see how far the game has come from their years in development to the official launch to now, six months later. The game has evolved in ways unimaginable with no true comparison to other otome games on the market. The strive to always improve, to implement new features, to take into consideration their audience's critique and criticism is truly admirable.

The thought, care, and planning of just not the main story, but also for each individual love interest is unlike any other otome games I have played in the past. They are truly wanting to create an immersive experience—actual memories—for their audience, and it is working. We have grown attached and fond of the characters from the main love interests to even the side characters.

Take into the fact that LADS is a global game, the coordination that went into making sure news and trailer releases are happening concurrently for players across different regions is mind-blowing.

As with any company, controversaries will happen. They could easily ignore any controversaries that come along, but instead they have chosen to be transparent with their players, which in this case was about Sylus' leak. They weren't obligated to address the issue, write letters to the players, or even share the first unscheduled preview, but clearly they have discussed within the company on how to handle the issue and have concluded that this was a decision they felt comfortable with and was necessary on their part.

For all of the jokes and jabs about personal financial woes, I am truly happy to see where my hard-earned money is going. I've played otome games for years, and have rarely ever been a F2P player, so from a spender's POV, I feel satisfied knowing my money is going to the hardworking people that have developed this game and being reinvested into the game for the future.

Elaborating further on the previous point: we have writers for the story, artists, programmers, video developers, voice actors, marketing team, musicians, etc. Truly, I can't wrap my head around just how many people are involved and feel sorry that I can't personally sing praises to them all.

With all of the new features we are getting in the upcoming update, that alone makes me feel happy to see that my money is not just going to a business to make a profit, but that it is being reinvested into the game.

With so much contents being developed behind the scene, I have no problem being patient when it comes to the main story. The next development looks to be a truly exciting one well worth the wait.

Even the planning of the livestream was a joy to witness. Using the kitties (giving them personalities and voices), creating a "news broadcast", the script for the livestream, and the personal letter at the end from the LADS team—everything about it felt so immersive and the letter was truly touching to read. We are being spoiled in so many ways and it's truly disappointing that there is even a small group that can't see this.

Now with such a big update around the corner, they will most likely release another survey for players to partake in. Please remember that surveys can be used to voice your thoughts on the game: constructive criticism and suggestions allow the devs to reevaluate what is working, what needs to change, and what can be explored in the future. Don't ever feel like your voice is not heard just because you don't see any immediate changes. Let the devs know what you like, what you don't, and what you hope to see in the future. It truly does make a difference.

If you made it this far in my post, then I also want to acknowledge fellow players: you have all made being a part of this community a truly wonderful and joyous experience.

Thank you to the artists for the beautiful artwork and comics shared.

Thank you to the writers for their stories, headcanons, theories, and other works.

The jokes, the memes, and the downright silliness of this fandom have brought many laughs. We're such clowns, but we are clowns together ❤️

Thank you to the people who help share the news, address questions and concerns, and offer game help to players. This has truly been a very welcoming fandom, and let's strive to keep it that way. 🥹

Thank you to everyone who has ever interacted, even if it's just a reblog, dropping a comment, gushing in the tags, etc. The genuine joy and love for the characters and game is one of the reasons why I personally am still invested. I am always happy to see people showing excitement during events, reacting to posts, etc. I am especially truly pleased by the respect the Tumblr community have for each other. Let's continue to make this a safe and welcoming place for current and future players! ❤️❤️❤️

Feel free to hijack my post. I encourage everyone to add their own thoughts. It's been a wonderful almost six months with all of you. I hope this continues. 🫶

[the-thursday]

Hello everyone, this post was long overdue, and finally, prompted by our beloved Howls also leaving, it's time for me to rip off the bandaid as well.

I would also like to announce a sort of departure from Ranger's apprentice fandom.

I do not know how many from RA fandom era from few years back are still here but I assume mostly newer blogs keep up with this account.

Take a lil history walk with me, if you will. I joined this fandom around 2017-18. I was very active around here, posting all kinds of stuff, fics, takes, incorrect quotes, art and whatnot. I made many friends with whom I had a great time and I am happy and honoured that I am friends with some of them till this day. Fandom became the second home to me as things hadn't been exactly easy irl and maybe I fixated on it too much, but gods know I loved this place so much. And I wish for everyone to experience this happiness and just as I made friends who became a significant part of my life, I wish that for you as well. Being surrounded by amazing and wonderful people and sharing similar interests is one of the most pure joyous feelings in this world.

As 2020-2021 rolled around, some of you know that things in my life picked up a harsh pace and I started to drift away. In 2021 I left the fandom because of that and unpleasant things with one of the people here. It was one of the most gut wrenching decisions I had made.

In 2022, I started gradually getting worse, but also had the courage to come back at the end of the year. I felt happy and welcomed and I am so grateful to everyone who made it happen, who supported me and gave me another breath. My mental health kept getting worse but I wasn't alone and that has been everything to me.

Now it's about a little more than a year since I've been back and again, I've met wonderful amazing people who I am happy and honoured to call friends. I don't regret coming back and I am happy I did, however I think it's time for me to go again. And below, I hope to explain why.

Like I said, I've been getting worse. Last autumn and this winter have been very difficult for me and I had to rethink some priorities, as life is going on the time left for me to invest in fandoms is getting thinner and thinner. Unfortunately, among them, isn't keeping up with this fandom. With my next words I hope not to insult anyone. The truth is, I don't find enjoyment in the fandom and content itself anymore, or more like, as much as I used to. I don't exactly vibe with posts for roughly the past half a year and I don't mean this in negative way, I just think it's for me to move on. All of the new people that I've seen have wonderful content and while I don't exactly vibe like I used to, I can see that you're having fun and that's important! People come and go and I do wish all the newcomers and seniors who are still here to have a great time, but I don't think I have energy, capacity and vibes to be part of it anymore. As you know, my blog has been very much inactive for a long time, aside from dumping my dumb sketches or reblogging something here and there. And rather than letting it rot, I'd like to cleanly move on. Anyhow, on self deprecating note, since really it's not like I've been someone prominent I don't think this is a loss to the fandom and this makes it easier for me.

So to summarise, my leaving is about personal things, my life moving and the fact I don't have the mental capacity or motivation to actively keep up.

So what does this mean? I won't be posting RA related stuff on this blog anymore. This blog will turn into a neutral main blog and I'll create one side blog for art that I hope to continue to make and maybe one blog dedicated to the work of Brandon Sanderson.

However, it doesn't mean that I am not up to goof around about RA anymore, however this will be done in DMs. If I sometimes get to draw and post RA related art, it shall be posted on my new art blog with RA tag. However, I don't think there's a high probability of public RA art from me anymore, because 1) need to move on and 2) I have a very strong and maybe confrontational opinion about art in this fandom that has given me a bad taste and discouraged me from enjoying making it and posting it. I won't go into details because I don't want to sour this post for myself and for y'all with it.

I want to thank this fandom for everything it has been for me and for everyone and I wish y'all some happy fandoming!

Yours only,

The Ranger Thursday 11

[jinmindeulle]

twenty one petals | do kyungsoo

𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 commoner!do kyungsoo x princess!reader

𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕 8.2 k

𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆 angst, romance | love at first sight, forbidden love

𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆 angsty, fluffy

𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 none

requested by @kyungseokie, thank you again! hope it's what you were looking for 🥰

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ 　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊ ＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　 ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊ ＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚ ＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚ ＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚

Twenty-one had always represented more than just a number to y/n.

She could finally obtain her freedom to go out of the Palace with only one guard, have her friends over more often, begin her self-defense classes, and learn more about the women she admired the most. Of course, y/n had always had history lessons for it was of utmost importance for a royal like her to be knowledgeable of her roots and ancestry. However, there was one particular Queen whom she had the most curiosity about. No teacher had dared to tell the story of Jeon Mindae, a royal who had vanished after eleven years of rule, and no one ever talked about what had happened to her.

As much as she was joyous about all those new possibilities, y/n was also terrified. Turning twenty-one had also meant that she was of age to finally get married, and the King was well aware of that. Her sister, barely a year older than her, had been married two months after her twenty-first birthday. Consequently, y/n was not expecting any other future for herself.

A week after her celebration, y/n found herself looking out of the window of her chambers, wondering how life went about for people whom she probably would never see ever again. She liked to contemplate all those various faces and create whole identities and characters, imagining stories, often romantic, for each person that called her attention.

Y/n envied them sometimes. Their lives could be different, more challenging, and less privileged, but at least they had certain freedoms to enjoy, even if they did not realize it. They could go out and about whenever, wherever, and with whoever they liked, they could lead an independent life, and above all, they could marry the person they loved. Those aspects of life were what y/n yearned the most, and ironically, was deprived of them. Her only alternative was her newly gained escapades. And she desperately needed to go out. 

Even though she had been able to leave the Palace for a couple of hours already, the guard who accompanied her was pretty annoying and watched her every step. He made sure people knew who she was and made her feel out of place, which was the opposite of what she had wanted. So, this time, she had asked the King to send another guard with her.

“Sir Sehun must accompany me this time, Your Highness”

“Why is that so, Princess?”

“I do not intend for people to recognize me when I leave the Palace. Sir Taehun was not fit for that role”

“For I trust Sir Sehun, I will assign him this duty. Await him by the gates”

“Thank you, Your Highness”

The woman could not help but smirk as she made her way out of the Crown room. Sehun was a dear friend of hers and she knew he was both, laidback and protective. She was the safest and most confident under his care. 

Y/n had to laugh when, after some minutes of impatient little walks around the gates, Sir Sehun approached her with his thick right eyebrow raised “Ma’am, may I ask why I was requested as your guard?”

“Well, Sir Sehun,” she interlaced her left arm with the soldier’s right one as he was offering, and began their walk out of the Palace “Taehun is a prick” she let out once they were out of sight, and a good distance from the nosy masses of the royal community.

“Nothing new. You just want me to let you live, then” he dropped off the formalities, as they usually did when together and in private — or at least away from those who could not live a life as anything else than aristocrats. 

“You know me so well”

The walk to the Cherry Blossom Market was quiet but pleasant. They both liked the silence and tranquility that the forest offered, and it was well known between them that it had to be savored each time, as opportunities like those were usually scarce. Upon reaching the first stalls, y/n sent a smile in Sehun’s way. That was her call for him to just let her go around but always under his careful watch, as she had promised. 

The beauty that y/n found there, she was sure could not be found anywhere else. Just the sight of people all dressed up in colorful yet comfortable ropes, some simple, some fancy, brought a new wave of giddiness to her body. The thought of being able to walk with them, passing as one more of the commoners, was what made her the most thrilled. She could pretend, just for a couple of hours, that she was one of the people she usually fantasized about through the glass of her window. 

A pair of the prettiest shoes caught her attention, and she had to stop to just admire them. Soft peachy colored silk embraced the pair, both adorned with delicate pink cherry blossom petals on each side. Sadly, she could not have them. The guards would snap them away from her the minute she went inside for the check-up. Commoner things stay with commoners. 

A light breeze took her out of her thoughts, and as she placed the shoes back where they belonged with a small bow to the stall owner, her eyes met a wooden bridge, which went over a quiet river. Cherry blossoms surrounded the area, their petals dancing their way to the ground, mimicking a snowy afternoon. After taking a look back to Sehun, who was well aware of her movements, she enthusiastically skipped to the beginning of the bridge, feeling the glee that the soft petals caressing her cheeks provided her with.      

The walk to the viaduct was calmer, yet never less eager. The middle of the bridge had a smaller number of people, so y/n decided that that was the right spot to rest a little and contemplate the delicateness of the running water, and how the pink petals bathed in it as if tired of hanging from a tree.

Although her hood was bothering her sightseeing, she knew people would recognize her out of paintings and written records, so she had the need to hide her face as much as she could. The risk was high enough with her hood up. 

Noticing how someone stopped right beside her and leaned their forearms on the railing, she took her gaze away from the river and to her other side, pretending to observe the cherry blossoms dancing to the rhythm of the wind. When the woman was about to walk away, she heard the person speak.

“Is it not incredible that there are over a hundred varieties of cherry blossom trees?” 

The deepness and smoothness of the voice that she now knew belonged to a man, had her stood still in her place. A shiver ran down her spine and she felt how her cheeks imitated the color of the most intense pink petals.

“It certainly is,” she replied, clearing her throat, still giving her back to the stranger. Though she was aware of the hazard that that man could represent, she physically could not move from her spot. It was as if the man’s voice had put a spell on her. 

“Are these your favorite?” he asked, and y/n could not help but crack a smile. 

“Fortunately, they are” 

Her body was moving without her taking notice, and suddenly she was no longer facing the trees but the very man who had interrupted her alone time, away from royalties, away from turmoil. And the sight in front of y/n had her sigh. 

A round face, giving him a youthful and friendly appearance, was complemented by brown almond-shaped eyes, which seemed captivating, warm, and inviting. His well-defined, thick eyebrows framed his eyes and added character to his face. The man sported a small, button-like nose that went well with his soft jawline. Though she tried to avoid looking at his lips, it had become an impossible task. Plump, well-defined, heart-shaped. Flawless. She last noticed that his dark brown hair was up in a topknot, all secured by a simple linen headband.

“Have you ever seen the Shirotae variety?” when his eyes met hers, y/n felt what she could only associate with what her romantic novels described as love at first sight. If it existed or not, she couldn't care less. For her, a man like him talking about her favorite tree and flower, looking at her in what seemed to be undivided attention and care, had to be hard to find — and that had her over the moon in just a couple of seconds.

“I have never left the Kingdom” she admitted, finally able to unglue her eyes from his. Overly conscious, she looked down at her feet, hiding her face as much as possible with the gray hood.

“Hwanggeum is known for having them all, though it is true that the Shirotaes are well beyond our borders. Are you from here, Agassi?”

It was the first time that someone had addressed her as a commoner, and rather than displeasing her, it encouraged her to keep talking to the man. He had not recognized her after all.

“I am, Seonsaengnim”

“So you are well acquainted with the Pink Shell” his faint smile had her melting right on the spot, but she somehow managed to conceal it. 

“It might also be the reason why they are my favorite. Though I have read about the other varieties, I have not had the chance to see them in person yet”

“Would you like to?”

If it meant that he could take her away and hold her hand for the rest of the afternoon, she would have yelled ‘Please!’. However, the sight of Sehun waiting for her by the end of the bridge, right behind the enticing man, had her come to her senses “I am afraid my father is not very keen on me going out often, especially out of the city”

“That was not my question, Agassi. Would you like to?”

“I would love to,” she nodded, and with all her might, bowed to say goodbye “It was pleasant to converse with you, Seonsaengnim. Have a good rest of your afternoon”

Walking past him, she tried to reach her guard friend as fast as possible. Her efforts, no matter how big, were cut short by a hand around her unclothed wrist. The warmth he transmitted was able to soothe her uncontrollable heart, just a little bit, for his hand over her skin, was not something her heart was expecting to feel.

“I still do not know your name” he recited, not letting go. “I am Kyungsoo. Do Kyungsoo”

“Pardon me Seonsaengnim, but I am not allowed to disclose my name” 

As if he sensed that that was all he was getting from her, the man she now knew to be named Do Kyungsoo let her hand go, and she was finally able to walk towards her guard. “Let’s go” she murmured over her breath, not stopping on her way back home. Sehun rapidly followed, not wanting to discuss what he had witnessed. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Do Kyungsoo stayed on her mind for the following two days, as if he had nowhere else to be. It was surprising how she could not just shoo him away. No matter how many classes she took, how many conversations she had or the piles of books she read, the man with warm eyes and plump lips would always come back. She was aware of the fact that the King would announce her inescapable marriage in the upcoming weeks, hopefully, months, and having met him, she did not want that day to come any time soon.

Three days had passed, and y/n could no longer bear it. She had to see Kyungsoo again, at least one last time.

“Indeed, Sir Sehun is available for you. Where are you heading to?” the King asked, and y/n raised her head.

“To the Cherry Blossom Market, Your Highness”

“Again?” With his eyebrows raised, he observed her every movement.

“I am truly in love with the cherry blossom trees, and these are the last days of their bloom. I yearn to admire them as long as I can”

A nod was the only permission she needed to perform a deep bow and leave the Crown room, looking for Sehun with her eyes. She spotted the guard standing next to the room’s entrance, already informed of his next duties. There was no need to say anything.

With her cloak on and hood already up, silence remained untouchable until they surpassed the main gates of the Palace. The discretion she continuously made sure to have had become sacred at that point. No one except Sehun could know about Do Kyungsoo. 

“Are you sure he is going to be there?”

“I am not, but this is the only way I can find out” she sighed, letting him walk by her side. 

“Why do you want to see him again?” he asked.

“Honestly, Sehun, I do not know,” the woman admitted “He has not left my mind ever since we met. The only certainty I have is that my heart is longing for him.”

“Do you like him?”

“It is hard to say. I have never felt this way, so I cannot compare it to anything other than what I read romantic in my novels”

“Not a great source, may I say” Sehun giggled, looking at her with small eyes. 

“I am sorry, Sir all-the-girls-love-me” her laugh synced with his, heading the conversation in a more relaxed direction. 

“Not only girls love me!”

Though tranquility had embraced her as they walked their way through the forest, the sight of the first market stalls made her heart race once again. He could be anywhere, but he was surely closer than before. 

When she felt Sehun squeeze her shoulder, she looked his way to find a comforting smile. She nodded. Words were not necessary between them.

Calculated but unconscious steps led her to the bridge where their heartwarming exchange had taken place. The trees were still there, now calmer than before. Petals were still falling, but their dance was more controlled and stable. The bridge itself had fewer people, and she thought that the stillness of the water could not be attractive enough for the masses. It was for her.

A deep breath was all she had to do to muster the courage and find the place where Kyungsoo had approached her. All she had to do was wait. But oh my! It was a true challenge. As she hummed a song that her sister had sung to her while she was little, y/n closed her eyes and let her mind wander around dangerous paths. His cute smile had popped up once again, and it was impossible for her not to smile back. The effect he had had on her in only a matter of minutes was incomprehensible. 

“Is it me that you are waiting for, Agassi?”

The feeling that her heart was about to jump out of her chest came back upon hearing his honeyed voice once again. Nothing could have prepared y/n for that moment, regardless of how many times she had imagined it.

“Yes,” she whispered, turning to him with rosy cheeks. Because she had expected to see his gentle smile, the seriousness of his expression took her aback “Oh… Is there something wrong, Seongsaengnim?”

“I now know why you did not want me to know your name, Your Grace”

Her surprise could not be veiled. How had that happened? Was she not careful enough? She would not have come back if she noticed any trace of recognition in his eyes. She could not risk her outings like that. 

“You are mistaking me for someone else” Her voice faltered, but her forehead was still up.

“I am not. You are Princess Y/n, daughter of King Younghee and sister of the future Queen, Princess Hara. I apologize for the boldness with which I addressed you the other day, Your Grace. It was only after our encounter that I realized who you were”

So that settled it. Her outings were over, her freedom was over. Seeing him was also over. She understood that good things only lasted for a short period, but she did not see the end coming so fast. 

“Why are you here?” y/n had to know at least that. Was he back to solely ask for forgiveness?

“I had wanted to see you again, Your Grace. I came back here the day following our meeting, but you were not here. That same evening, I traveled to the Grand Market to buy more merchandise to sell at the Market, and I saw the big portrait of your family at the entrance. How could I not know who you were?” the calmness with which he uttered his sentences had y/n in a trance. His eyes had not left hers, as if he had rehearsed for that exact instant together.  “After learning about your true identity, I knew I had to stop myself from expecting this encounter to happen again”

“But it happened” she murmured, feeling her chest expanding with a deep breath. 

“I genuinely tried, Your Grace” he shook his head, still not moving an inch from his spot “But it proved to be impossible.”

The silence that followed his statements permitted the woman to process her sentiments, one by one. There was nervousness. Uncertainty. Fear. But there was also expectancy. Excitement. Bliss. 

“We are not supposed to do this” he continued “A commoner can only dream of meeting a royal and give her the life she deserves. I know I am not able to do so. However, I am here. And you are here too, Your Grace”

“I needed to see you again,” she admitted, taking her hood away from her view. She had to see him in all his plenitude because it had to be the last time “only one more time. My mind was playing tricks and my duties could not be fulfilled if I had you in my head every hour”.

“I understand,” Kyungsoo nodded, and for the first time that afternoon, his fingers touched hers. Her lifetime seemed to pass right in front of her eyes as the caress of his warm skin against hers filled her senses. It was overwhelming, yet y/n wanted more. “I want you to have this. We cannot interact in person anymore, but I consider letters to be a very effective way to communicate. If that is what you want, Your Grace”

The eager nod she gave him made Kyungsoo show the first smile of the afternoon. His relief could be sensed, and that also gave her the reaffirmation she had been desperate for. With a discrete hand movement, she took the folded piece of paper, keeping it inside her cloak’s pocket. 

“I also know you will get married in the near future” his forehead furrowed, and y/n felt how her eyes welled up. That was a topic she was not ready to face, especially with him “Although that makes it even more dangerous and unfeasible, I am still willing to do this. Are you, Your Grace?”

Not following her heart was not an option. She would allow herself to be selfish this time.

“I am”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Your Royal Highness,

I hope this letter finds you in good health and high spirits. I write to you with the utmost humility and respect, fully aware of the immeasurable distance that separates your world from mine.

Since the moment I first had the privilege of glimpsing your radiant presence from afar, my heart has embarked on a journey it had never before known. It is a journey filled with profound admiration, deep respect, and, dare I say, love that transcends all boundaries.

I am but a humble commoner, a mere speck in the grand tapestry of your Father’s noble kingdom. Yet, as I go about my daily toils, I find myself endlessly enchanted by thoughts of you. Your delicateness, your kindness, your voice—all of these qualities have illuminated my every waking moment from the second you answered my inquiry.

Please understand that I harbor no illusions of grandeur, nor do I seek to intrude on your world. My affection is a silent and solitary affair, a secret held close to my heart, and now to yours. It is a love that has to remain unspoken, for I am painfully aware that my place in society precludes any dreams of an impossible union.

I am content to serve my kingdom, my family, and my fellow commoners with all the devotion and diligence I can muster. In doing so, I hope to honor the same virtues that have earned you the admiration and adoration of all who have had the privilege of knowing you.

May your days be filled with happiness and prosperity.

With the utmost reverence and eternal devotion,

DKS.

His neat calligraphy imprinted in liquid ink had perfectly accompanied what he had expressed in that letter. Kyungsoo’s well-thought-out words had her heart leap in excitement and yearning. The man had probably spent an afternoon ardently writing, employing careful words and admiring sentences. 

In return, she had to let him know what he had done to her as well. The impossibility of their reunion could not make their days heavy with misery.  

My Dear Kyungsoo,

I wish nothing but good health and spirits for you in return. Your words have touched my heart, and I am deeply moved by the sincerity and humility with which you express your feelings.

Your admiration and respect have not gone unnoticed. I am grateful for your kind words and the sentiments you have shared with me. It is rare to encounter such genuine devotion and honor in this world, and your letter has brought warmth to my heart.

I must confess that your unwavering dedication to our kingdom and your fellow commoners resonates deeply with me. Your commitment to serving our people is a testament to the qualities that make our realm strong and resilient.

It is with a heavy heart that I must acknowledge the realities of our respective stations in life. The traditions and responsibilities that come with my position demand a life of duty and sacrifice, which I am still unable to come to terms with. Your affection is a gift I shall cherish in my heart, but I also have to understand the limitations that bind us.

I encourage you to continue your path with the same steadfast determination and honor that you have shown thus far. Your devotion to our kingdom is a treasure, and I have no doubt that your contributions will be felt and appreciated by many.

Please know that I hold your words and your spirit in high regard. 

With the deepest respect and warm regards,

y/n. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Weeks had passed, and letters had come and gone. What had first started as a timid and knowingly-impossible romance, was now a tragedy that only found its way to the surface through words of passion, endeavor, and selflessness. 

The only one who knew about their exchange was Sehun. Since he was made responsible for her outings, no matter where they were, he had soon suggested delivering the letters back and forth, as he had understood how hazardous their short encounters could be. Seeing each other from afar from time to time was not enough, but was the only thing they could do for their growing affection. 

When she did not go with Sehun, their letter exchange was not done over the bridge. The men had made up a system unknown to y/n, but extremely effective in turn. Despite knowing how she was putting herself at risk each time she hid her letter in Sehun’s sleeve, she trusted her guard. Because receiving Kyungsoo’s letter was the only time of the week she felt purposefully happy, she neither wanted to nor would stop.

But alas, as she had learned, everything came to an end. However, that was not the way she had wanted it to happen. 

“Kyungsoo was not there this morning” Sehun’s forehead creased, worrisome written all over his face.

“What?” she had to stop herself from actually yelling, and shielded her mouth with one of her hands “Not any trace?”

“None”

“He has never done this”

A knock on her chamber’s door startled both of them, and Sehun had to take a step back to allow her to reach the hatch next to him. She looked at him, puzzled, and with a deep breath opened the door. 

“Your Grace, Your Highness is requesting your presence in the Crown room”

“Is it urgent?”

“It is, Your Grace”

Thanking the maid, y/n closed the door behind her and hugged Sehun “I have a bad feeling about this”

Call it third eye, intuition, or merely understanding. The woman had not failed to see what was coming. 

“You are to get married next week, y/n. Everything has been settled, and I am glad to announce that your future husband is the best prospect I could find for you. You will meet him in three days when he comes to formally propose to you.”

When she squeezed her eyes shut, the tears that had shimmered them traveled down her pale cheeks. Y/n could only see Kyungsoo reciting his letters to her in his mellowed voice, promising her to find a way to be together, not caring about social boundaries anymore. She only wanted to hear his whispers, to feel his tender touch, and to experience what would be like to have his inviting lips caress her own.

But now, the King was taking that away from her. The possibility they had built through their letters had to remain impossible. 

“Why are you doing this to me, Dad?”

It was the first time in years that y/n had called the King dad. She had felt that he no longer deserved that title, no matter how painful it was to lack that figure in her life. After her mother’s passing, he changed. His anguish for his loss had duplicated hers and Hara’s. He had forgotten that he had two daughters who had lost a mother and had only started to care for his heartbreak. 

“You are more naive than I wished you were.” he declared, unmoved by her emotions “I could have waited some weeks, some months even. But your recent behavior was proof enough that you need someone to discipline you”

“What are you talking about?” a mess already, y/n felt how her future with Kyungsoo vanished little by little. The love they had both developed over months through words and glances from afar was coming to an end, and there was nothing she could do to prevent it from happening.  

“Twenty-one is the prime of your life, and albeit you are not becoming Queen, you have duties to fulfill. Disregarding that, you have been frequently meeting a commoner, y/n. Please, do not tell me that that is not accurate, because I have eyes all over my kingdom. The greatest way to get you back on track is to give your hand in marriage to someone who is well-versed in our world, and knows how to treat you”

“As a trophy? As garbage? As a scum?” 

“Has your sister protested like you are? How do you know you will be treated badly if you have not crossed glances with him?” his harsh tone would not scare her away.

“I do not have to do that to understand that he will make my life miserable. The one person who is able to make me happy is not him” Rage was getting into her quite rapidly. She had to fight for what she wanted. But how?

“The one person you are so sure about making you happy is no longer available. I am sorry, daughter, but this is your life.”

“What have you done to him?!” 

“Return to your chambers, y/n. That was all I had to say”

“Dad?! What have you done to him?!” 

The sorrow was unmeasurable. She had put Kyungsoo at risk, she had made him suffer the consequences of loving her. She had selfishly walked him to a dark place, which she did not even know what it looked like. Where was he? Was he even alive? 

The pressure that was building in her chest was somewhat relieved when Sehun went inside her room, with no knocking in between. He was the only one she had allowed to do that in case of an emergency. And God knows she was in need of what Sehun could provide to her, be it a hug or simple reassurance words. But luck was on her side — if one could say that after what she was about to go through — and he was there with more than just that.

“I know what happened” Taking her hands into his, he began to share the information he was able to gather “Taehun has been following us, and he was the one who told your father about Kyungsoo”

“That bastard!” y/n’s eyes flooded with tears as she squeezed Sehun’s hands harder.

“I have never liked him, but that just crossed the line” he admitted “The King sent his soldiers to capture Kyungsoo, and now they got him in the dungeons” “Oh my Goodness” the fear multiplied, and the sudden relief she had felt upon seeing her best friend disappeared to make room for that familiar pressure, this time coming back twice as bad.

“I have a plan” he nodded, placing his big hands on her shoulders “Jaemin is watching over him during the night shift… and he owes me”

Y/n could do nothing else than cry on his shoulder and thank him over and over again. She truly did not know what she would do without her loyal guard, without her Sehun.

—

With her fingers tightly gripping her dress sleeves, the princess followed the guard down the spooky stairs of the dungeons. Though not too far away from the Palace, they had to ride a horse to make it quicker — and she was not a fan of horses. However, this time, she did not really care. Kyungsoo was her only priority. 

“Why is this so smelly?” she whispered, coughing when the damp odor reached her nostrils.

“Do you think they would bother to clean this?” 

“Too busy standing next to the King, I guess.”

Just when the flight of stairs started to appear endless, y/n saw light coming from one of the corners, and she could finally breathe “He’s here, right?”

But the woman did not have to wait for Sehun’s response, because he was right there. Sitting with his back resting on one of the rusty cell bars, Kyungsoo looked drained. His face was pale and smeared with dirt and sweat. His clothes were ragged and mucky. Because his eyes were closed, she could only guess — and hope — that he was sleeping. 

“Stay back. I’ll talk to Jaemin first”

As Sehun walked towards the light, she could sense how the movement around him was slowly waking him up from his slumber. His eyes had lightened up when he recognized her best friend and a sense of easiness travelled down through y/n’s spine. 

“Come, y/n”

If Kyungsoo’s eyes had lightened up when he saw Sehun, the instant his gaze met hers he appeared to hold the stars and the moon altogether in his orbs. “You are here”

No time was wasted when the master key let him out of the cell. They embraced each other for the first time, and the relief that they both felt upon finally having their love in their arms was indescribable. Letters were incredible, but they lacked contact, they lacked tangible affection.

“I am so sorry” she cried, taking in the feeling of his arms around her waist, and how his left hand caressed the back of her head with soft strokes.

“None of this is your fault, my love” he whispered, and being able to hear his sweet voice calling her that endearment sent her heart jumping out of her ribcage “We were aware of the risks. And I am still delighted with the decision we made”

“How?” 

“Because I get to have you in my arms now” he let her go, only to place his hands on her cheeks, looking into her eyes as if they held the universe. “We will be fine”

“Why are you so confident about that?” y/n could not help but be hesitant about everything around her now. She had only questions in her mind, no clear answers in sight. 

“Because” he brushed her lower lip with his thumb, his eyes traveling down with it, and back to her orbs “what we have is not easily broken. They can try, but we fight back. And if it is not now, it will be then. We will be together, my love. Trust me”

And with that promise, Kyungsoo pressed his lips onto hers and sealed the deal. The initial surprise had her frozen, trying to figure out what was actually happening. But when everything was clear, y/n closed her eyes and let him in. His passionate way of kissing her was more telling of his love for her than any of his letters were, and that was a lot to say. He was an excellent writer. But when it came to kissing…

Their romantic moment was cut short when Sehun fake coughed in an attempt to get their attention. When their lips were mere centimeters away from each other, he was quick to intervene “I am really sorry to interrupt your… moment, but she cannot stay much longer”

“What do you mean stay?” the woman looked at her best friend, baffled by his statement “Is he not coming with us?”

It may have been a dumb question, but she did not see how they could not just let him go, at least to hide somewhere far away.

“That would be an overly bad idea” Kyungsoo uttered, interlacing his fingers with hers “That would get everyone killed. Me, Sehun, the other guard. We cannot risk it” he shook his head, and rapidly let her hands go to brush the tears running down her cheeks “We will find another way, my love”

“But…” she sobbed, suddenly feeling like a little kid in his arms “I do not want you to die, my darling” 

“I am not dying anytime soon. I have to become your prince first” he giggled, and that sent the butterflies in her stomach on a wild flight.

“Guys…”

“Sorry,” Kyungsoo apologized and pressed a kiss on her forehead “Go back to your chambers and wait for Sehun to tell you what to do next. Whether the plan takes a week, two months, or three years… we cannot know for sure. The only thing I know for a fact is that we are meeting again, and we will have our happily ever after. I promise you, my love”

y/n would recite those exact words for the following two years, be it aloud or in her mind. Kyungsoo’s vow was not to leave her soul anytime soon, and she decided to use it as a way to have him close to her heart every day. 

She had had to get married. She had had to share a room with someone she did not love. She had played the trophy wife role for too long for her liking. But Sehun had continuously reassured her that the plan was going smoothly, and if everything happened according to it, she would meet Kyungsoo in a short time.

“Hajoon wants me to become pregnant” she confessed, a halo of panic in her eyes “I cannot deal with this anymore” Her cheeks, very familiar with her tears by that point, wetted the beginning of her bluey sweetheart bodice.

“When are you heading to the tour around Hwanggeum?”

“In three days”

“Hold on for a week. We are getting there”

Do you know that feeling of time slowing down when what you only need is the wait to be over? That was what y/n was experiencing ever since she left Kyungsoo in that horrid dungeon, hoping that seeing him again would be a matter of days. Her heart was hopeful, but her mind was not so much so. She knew that rushing into what your feelings dictate never brings good results, but the urgency had become tangible as the months went by. 

He was in the back of her mind most of her days, but very much present when her husband pressed kisses on her forehead, and occasionally on her lips. Despite not liking him much, she had to admit that Hajoon was clearly not the worst. He had respected her boundaries and only touched her when she let him. She was suspiciously sure that he had a lover way before they had gotten married, and that was a strange relief for the woman. However…

“I truly wish things were different, y/n… but we have to produce an heir soon”

“It sounded like you really want that” she sarcastically replied.

“Your Father…”

“Of course” she nodded, putting her hairbrush away to look at him “I will tell him we are trying. A child is not part of my plans right now”

The only person in her plans was Kyungsoo, and the wait was becoming heavier on her. In order to relieve stress, she took the first book she could get from the history section of the library and headed out to the gardens. It was nice to just feel the breeze clash with her rosy cheeks, and just let it calm her nerves down. The copy she had blindly chosen was one she had never seen in the years and years she frequented the library, and that encouraged her to go through the yellowed pages before choosing a story. Y/n had to stop on page one hundred and thirty-six, one with its edge slightly folded. There, a sketched portrait of an elegant woman caught her attention. Her stern look was emphasized by a set of well-defined curls that framed her clear face, big eyes, and slim nose. Her lips were pressed in a soft line as if they had been like that for a long time.

Jeon Mindae.

The one and only secret that the royals were good at hiding, but could only conceal for so long. She had noticed how even after turning twenty-one, no one was mentioning her, not even to highlight the great advances that had happened during her short reign. But now, she was about to discover the truth.

In the annals of Hwanggeum's rich history, there exists a chapter of intrigue, love, and profound change that transcends the centuries. This is the tale of Queen Jeon Mindae, whose reign is forever etched in the hearts and minds of the people, for it was marked by an extraordinary love affair and a subsequent transformation of the kingdom's destiny.

Queen Mindae, known for her benevolence and wisdom, ascended to the throne during a time of prosperity and unity. Her rule was celebrated for the well-being and happiness it brought to her subjects. Nevertheless, behind the façade of a perfect queen lay a hidden love that would change the course of Hwanggeum's history.

Unbeknownst to her court and subjects, Queen Mindae had fallen deeply in love with Kim Beomseok, a commoner she had encountered during a secret exploration of her kingdom disguised as a humble citizen. Their love, while genuine, was forbidden, as royal protocol dictated that a queen must wed a nobleman from a neighboring kingdom.

For years, Queen Mindae and Beomseok carried on their love affair in the shadows, yearning to be together openly. The burden of the crown and the expectations of the kingdom stood as barriers between them.

The climax of this tale came during a grand ball in the palace, held to celebrate Hwanggeum's prosperity. On this fateful night, Queen Mindae mysteriously vanished, plunging the kingdom into a state of chaos and confusion. Wild rumors swirled about her fate, from kidnapping to assassination, as the people sought answers.

The official proclamation, issued by the royal council, declared that Queen Mindae had forsaken her throne to elope with Beomseok, her commoner lover, relinquishing her responsibilities. Her disappearance was thus presented as a voluntary act. Hwanggeum was left in the hands of Princess Miyoung, a distant cousin, who was chosen to rule in Mindae's absence.

Yet, the official narrative failed to quell the suspicions and doubts of the kingdom's citizens. In secret gatherings and hushed conversations, the people of Hwanggeum rejected the notion that their beloved queen would willingly abandon them.

The queen's true location was never found, and a network of loyalists worked tirelessly to erase Queen Mindae of Hwanggeum’s history. However, the people of Hwanggeum yearned for her return, not to rule, but to be a symbol of love and unity. 

To this day, the last of us are patiently waiting to get a glimpse of her once again, to see her next to her beloved Beomseok, and to thank her for her transparent and wealthy rule. Queens like her are not made any longer. 

She had to be more sensitive than usual because as she read each word, the tears were uncontrollably running down her face. It was like seeing herself in the mirror, but only seeing one difference: she had been unable to run away with her true love. 

How had been Jeon Mindae’s life after vanishing? Had she been happy?

She truly hoped she was. She knew the feeling of loving someone who you are not supposed to and fighting for it to be alive even after years of waiting. It was exhausting, yet worth it, if by the end of the line she got to see him again.

Y/n kept the book pressed against her chest to the third destination of their tour, as a way to keep Jeon Mindae’s story close to her heart. If what Sehun had promised a week before was true, she was about to see Do Kyungsoo after two desperate years of sharing a bed with a stranger, pretending not to die a little with each passing day. That was not the life she had wanted for herself, but what could she do? 

Just wait, said her best friend every day. So she did just that.

But now, seeing the premises of Gyulcheon, it was like the sun was finally shining for her. Its citizens were slowly gathering around their carriage, waving at her and Hajoon, who had sported the same fake smile for the last five days. 

The city center was prepared to receive them, and the line of people who had gifts for them kept on growing as they got closer to the Palace’s entrance.

Her husband leaving the carriage first, y/n waited for Sehun to open the door for her once it was safe to do so. High-end families and generals bowed at her as she walked all the way to the Palace’s porch, and she could only smile at them with faked enthusiasm. Hajoon, awaiting her at the first step of the staircase, took her by her elbow and led her to the seatings decorated with golden and ancient figures. For the next two hours, they met Gyulcheon’s citizens who had to welcome them with gifts and offerings, a long-held tradition which the princess found pointless. Why would rich people need presents from poor, unprivileged ones? How was that even fair?

“I have to apologize My Prince, but I was only able to afford an honorable gift for My Princess”

The voice she had longed to hear for so many days, months, and years, reached her ears in an unexpected place. Her gaze pinned to her lap slowly raised to meet the eyes she had yearned to see, and the knot she had had in her throat ever since that night in the dungeons, tightened. He was as beautiful as she remembered, like time had stopped as soon as they met. Fighting back the urge to throw her arms around him, she bowed at him with her head and took a deep breath.

“You do not have to worry. I am content if my wife is.” and with that, Hajoon turned to the next peasant, who was offering him a wrapped-up gift.

“Thank you, Seongsaengnim” In a murmur, she took the laced box from his hands, trying to at least brush his fingers with hers. The shiver that she felt traveling down her spine was a sign of how strong her love for him was, even after all those years.

“Please try them as soon as you can, Your Grace. I would be devastated if they did not fit you”

His low buzz had her dancing in a cloud of her own. However, the guard that was next to him made it clear that he had to move quickly. More people were waiting behind. 

“I will, Seongsaengnim. I thank you again. It was nice to meet you” Pressing the box to her chest, she bowed at him once more, Kyungsoo copying her with an even deeper one. When they slowly rose, it was as if they had already blended their thoughts. “I love you” was whispered from both ends and a soft smile graced their faces when the man departed. 

Later that day, and alone in the chambers she was offered for her stay, she quickly headed to the corner where all their offerings had been placed. Hajoon was in a meeting, so she had time to find the only one that mattered. The laced box was hidden under the hundred packed gifts, so she had to make a big effort to retrieve it once it was on her radar. Once in her hands, waiting was no longer an option. Not even taking her time to appreciate the decorations around it, she removed the cover and tore through the white tissue paper wrap. What she found took her back to that afternoon, the afternoon that had changed her life.

The pair of shoes she had caught sight of that day were in her hands. She would never forget that soft peach silk that embraced the pair, and how those pink cherry blossom petals adorned them so delicately. With a cheeky sigh, y/n concluded that he had seen her from the moment she had set foot in the Cherry Blossom Market, when she had run to the stall, too entranced by the shoes to even care who noticed her. 

His words from the morning popped up in her mind as she ran her fingers around the shoes, and she rapidly put them on the floor to try them on. She knew he had meant something with it — the plan had to be resumed. As soon as she put them on, a relieved giggle left her lips. They were about to be together, once and for all. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

“All set?”

She nodded to her husband and took Sehun’s hand to step into the carriage. Once inside, her best friend winked at her, and she had to suppress the smirk she wanted to give him in return. Nothing could make her happier than seeing him ride his horse by her window, Hajoon too preoccupied with his book to even spare her a glance.

Their long conversation was interrupted when the carriage made an unexpected stop, and her husband looked out of the window for the first time in hours “What is happening?”

As Sehun yelled “Ambush!”, everything seemed to occur in slow motion. Half a dozen men all covered in black from head to toe surrounded the wagon, one of them violently opening its entrance door as the rest engaged in physical fights with the horsed soldiers, less in number and not so much prepared to respond to such a sudden attack.

The man who opened their door was quick to take her by the arm and shove her out, not even caring to check if her clumsy fall had caused any harm to her body. Indeed it had, but she was too busy screaming for help to even notice that her wrist had twisted under her weight in her landing. “Please!” she yelled as the stranger dragged her to his horse and effortlessly sat her on its saddle. 

“y/n!” She heard Hajoon’s voice muffled by all the swording around them. When she looked behind her, the stranger had already taken his own weapon out of his scabbard, waiting for her husband to get closer. However, he was never capable of doing so — another one of the ambushers had his blade pressed to his throat. 

“Do not move.”

“Hajoon!”

Her cry was followed by her kidnapper gracefully jumping on his horse, slightly adjusting his position in front of her. Triggering movement with his heel, the brownish animal began his race right into the woods, the carriage quickly disappearing from sight. 

It was only about half an hour into their ride that y/n let herself breathe in the fresh air. His addicting scent reached her nostrils in the process, and a chuckle escaped her lips as she strongly wrapped her arms around the man. 

“I missed you” she whispered to his ear, and he squeezed her hand in his. 

“I missed you too, my love”

[wasteddmoondust]

this dream isn't feeling sweet || harry potter

pairing: harry potter and sister!reader 1,036 words, a bit of cursing, sibling comfort, post-war eighth year au, a little hurt comfort, your parents' death day, sibling argument, don't worry they make up a/n; I've had this thought like a very very long while... and it solidified when i was listening to ribs by lorde (a song that just wrecks me as i get older)

this dream isn't feeling sweet we're reeling through the midnight streets and i've never felt more alone

Halloween does not come easy for you.

There was a feast in the Great Hall, celebrating the occasion. You're sure there are floating lanterns, delicious food, and joyous music.

But for you, it's crisps as you sit on the floor of the Gryffindor common room by the fire. It's a tradition you and Harry somehow kept, once again this year despite the war being over and the man who brought your parents' death was defeated.

You know despite all of that they'll never come back.

Halloween doesn't come easy for either of you, But it definitely doesn't become easier when you told Harry this morning that you won't be joining him for Auror training after your graduation. Now you have a new thing to lament over.

The packet of crisps are almost done. Your knees are tucked against your chest. There's a part of you that wants to grab something else to eat, but the ache in your heart prevents you from doing so.

You hear the door to the common room open and close, but you don't look back to check who it is. You hope they won't disturb you.

Harry sits down next to you with a grunt, crossing his legs and leaning back against the sofa. You still don't acknowledge him. The conversation from this morning replays in your head.

"What do you mean you're not coming with me? Are you saying I'll be there on my own?" he's almost shouting.

"Why does that matter? You'll have Ron!"

"This isn't about him. We're the ones with a scholarship lined up. It's an opportunity we can't miss!"

You look up at him in disbelief. "A scholarship earned by fighting in a war? Do you have any idea how messed up that is? I didn't choose to be in the war, Harry. I didn't choose to be one of the chosen ones!"

"But it's always been us, hasn't it? The Potter siblings! We're meant to do this together!"

You press your palms to your face, taking a deep breath, "I can't-"

"Fine! Then don't. Don't even come talk to me."

Harry walks away, leaving you stranded with other students watching.

Your head is spinning so much. From too many thoughts and feelings or the lack of food? You don't know.

Harry breaks the silence, "You haven't eaten." You don't reply.

He runs a hand through his hair, sighing. "They have your favourite made downstairs, it's really good."

You keep staring at the floor. You don't say anything.

"Please, talk to me," he says, voice softer now.

"I thought you didn't want me talking to you," you murmur back.

"I was angry," he immediately replies, trying to reason with you. "Can I ask you something?"

You finally turn your head to look at him.

"Do you... ever wonder how they felt? Before they died?"

Somehow, the question does not hit you as hard as you thought it would. You nod, of course, you have. How could you not? It's been on your mind since you've understood how they died and the weight that has been left on you and your brother. Now with your new maturity and the scars left from battle, it's time to navigate your lives without them.

"Having to take care of two babies during a war doesn't sound the most ideal does it?" you say. "They must have really loved us if we're still here."

"And soon we're gonna be older than they ever were."

Silence follows after that. The fact really hits both of you. If not for their protection, it's possible that either one of you wouldn't have made it.

You let out a sigh, "It feels so scary, getting old..."

we can talk it so good we can make it so divine we can talk it good how we wish it would be all the time

"I'm sorry... I didn't know you didn't want to become an Auror."

You're quiet for a bit, thinking of what to say.

"Aren't you tired of fighting?" you ask.

Harry is stunned by the question, he'd never thought of it before. You take his silence as a means to continue.

"Our whole lives, we spent it fighting. Fighting to live while we were with the Dursleys. Fighting a troll in our first year, and then a basilisk in second year, and then there we were scared shitless when they all said a murderer wanted to kill us. You almost got killed in fourth year, and fifth year- Name one single year of our education which was peaceful."

"We risked our lives to destroy horcruxes and fought a whole war and killed Voldemort. And now people want me to become an Auror?" You sigh, "I'm tired, Harry. I just need peace and quiet after all this. If anything, we deserve it."

Harry is looking down now, pondering your explanation. He knows you're right.

"It's fine if you want to go," you say. "You should, if your passion is enough. You've always been a better fighter than me."

He furrows his brows. "That's not true. You're a great fighter."

"Not enough for me to want to keep going."

Harry sighs, taking the time to properly form his thoughts.

"I'm scared," he admits. "We've always been together. From the days at the Dursleys and all throughout school. When I died, it wasn't just me, you were there too. I just- I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Ugh, you're such a baby. You're 18 years old, you can handle yourself."

Harry laughs, and you immediately feel more comfortable slowly returning to your usual sibling banter.

"I'm not dying, I'm just..." You shrug. "Not going the same path."

"So what are you going to do?" he asks.

"Something potions related, I think," you reply. "Remus once told me Mum wanted to do something like that."

Harry eyes you, "Potions? I pity whoever you work with."

You scoff and shove him. "Shut it! You're piss at potions!"

He's full-on laughing now, contagious enough for it to make you giggle too.

When the laughter dies down, he says "You're the only friend I need."

You look at him, deadpan. "That's not true. We'll meet new people and do new things but we'll still have each other."

"You promise?"

You hold out your pinky. He does too, and links his pinky with yours.

"I promise."

you're the only friend i need sharing beds like little kids we'll laugh until our ribs get tough but that will never be enough

a/n: teehee. i love siblings. this one has been in the drafts for months and i'm so glad i got somewhere. tho i can't say it's my best work but it's ok, we learn out here. also wtf I've written so much recently i really hope you guys are enjoying it <3

likes and reblogs are always appreciated!

[fr3sh-tragedies]

hey! hope you’re doing well🫶🏻

i was wondering if you can write more fics with Rose Winters x fem reader, because i really liked the most recent fic with her. 💕

thank you! have a good day! 🩷

Admission

[Shadows of Rose] Rosemary Winters x Female Reader

Summary: Rose has grown to like you, though she keeps her feelings hidden, convinced that you wouldn't feel the same way. Her worries are relieved when you sit her down for a talk.

Word Count: 3.17k Content Warnings: Fear of rejection Category: Soft Angst + Heavy Fluff || One-shot

[A/N]: Sorry for taking so long to post again. I've been trying to figure stuff out with my meds, and it's been messy. Thank you so much for requesting, hun! I hope you like what I managed to come up with!

[A/N] #2: Sorry if the formatting for the images and GIF above are weird. I kept trying to edit it properly on my phone and my laptop, but it kept changing every time I saved the post.

Enjoy!

Blended between the gentle rustle of leaves and the soulful songs of birds chirping high above, hearty barks of laughter sprung to life. Trailing forward on the graveled path encircling the small scenic park, you and Rose snickered with each shared inside joke passed alongside light, playful pushes, uncaring of the eyes trained on you in curiosity and slight annoyance.

As she spoke about another joyous memory of hers, you couldn’t help but take notice of the features adorning the heavenly smile painted across Rose’s lips. Although her eyes only periodically met yours as she recalled and retold the story in her mind, the way they crinkled from the amusement – also evident in her tone – was prominent. Similarly, upon chuckling in response to a particularly comical moment, the bridge of her nose scrunched up, and you watched as her hands flew down to rest on her gut to prevent herself from doubling over as another wave of laughter erupted from her throat.

God, she was beautiful.

You’d known that since the moment you met her years ago during one of her outdoor training exercises. To this day you were unsure as to why she was suddenly allowed to train away from the BSAA grounds, though you would forever be grateful to the soldiers stationed there who let her be free for a day and enjoy the park between training sessions.

You remembered watching her in pure awe then, just as you continued to do now. Everything about her amazed you.

On that particular day when you had first met, it was inspiring to witness how effortlessly she seemed to move during practice, and even more breathtaking to see how intrigued she was by the nature that surrounded her when she was allowed a break. The way her cheesy grin grew as she watched two birds dancing up in the branches, how the brightness of her blue eyes filled with curiosity when they finally landed on you, how she eagerly bounced your way with her arm outstretched – each little characteristic she presented to you swept you off your feet.

“Hi, I’m Rose,” she chirped once you managed to snap out of your awestruck trance and take her hand into your own. When you timidly offered up your name, she nodded and repeated it. “Pretty name,” she noted out loud to herself. She hadn’t seemed to notice the way your body tensed, nor the way your face grew warm and red at her words. Instead, she asked what you were doing there, and more importantly why you’d been watching her.

A moment passed where you came forward with no explanation, desperately trying to find a good enough excuse that wouldn’t make you come across as odd to this new, bubbly girl. Finally, you forced yourself to admit that you thought what she had been doing looked cool. “Oh, really?” She asked, her brows raised. “Why don’t you join me then? It’ll be fun!”

At first you tried to deny her suggestion. All it took to win you over, however, was a small, drawn-out “please,” paired with the pleading eyes you would later learn to be her favorite way to convince you to do what she wanted. Ultimately, you agreed, and she led you to the small, secluded section of the park she had been using to train all day. Just as she had begun to explain one of the easier maneuvers, excited to have someone to finally talk to, a gruff, towering man approached, halting her small lesson with a question of his own.

“Who is this, Rose?”

She turned to him, all of a sudden trembling and waving her hands about as she did her best to defend herself to this strange man. “She’s just a friend,” was how she started, and his head cocked itself to the side, eyes trained heavily on you with some kind of emotion you couldn’t pinpoint. “I figured we could do a few of the training moves together for fun.” The man sighed, shoulders drooping with fatigue and rough hand raising to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Rose, we’ve been over this.”

“I know, but I just thought it wouldn’t hurt to ease up this once. Chris, I’ve been working so hard, just like you want me to, but I really want to take a break every once in a while. Why can’t I just relax for one day? Isn’t that why you brought me out here this time?”

You remembered standing there, hands practically tied together in an attempt to ease the harsh trembling they carried. The soft breeze that day only forced you to take notice of the frigid beads of sweat forming on the back of your neck, which you not-so-subtly swiped at as you listened to them speak. The nerves throughout your body spiked when the man, whose name you barely managed to pick up on as Chris, glared over at you once more.

Wordlessly, his gaze flickered between you and Rose. You could feel yourself melting beneath his crushing eyes, your own focus landing on the soft tufts of vibrantly green grass beneath your shoes.

“Just this once,” he said at length, prompting you to snap your head up to face him again. You weren’t sure who he was, but you could tell how important his word was to Rose, who had once again grown giddy at his permission. “Thank you, Chris,” she cheered as she tugged him sideways into a small hug.

She pulled you to a nearby spot and continued explaining the specific move she had tried to talk about earlier. Chris kept a watchful eye on the two of you, though you could tell it was more on you than her. After some time, you didn’t even notice him anymore, too engulfed in the game you and Rose had made up and started playing. By the time soft blues and purples began to paint the sky, you saw how he seemed to be more at ease around you, even offering you a kind smile before you parted ways with your new friend.

Now, as you trotted through the park with that same friend, it was all too easy to listen to her poke fun at a few failed training experiments she had with Chris over the years. Even with her teasing words, it was clear how much the man meant to her. “He’s like a second father to me,” she told you once.

As she finished her thought and turned to you, you blinked, unsure of whether or not she had asked you something. You had been too focused on how the palette of the setting sun casted itself beautifully over the blonde locks tucked underneath her cap and her pale skin, the hues alone making her look ethereal. You fidgeted with your phone in your pocket for a moment, wanting to capture her in that moment.

“Is there something on my face?” She questioned suddenly, subconsciously wiping her mouth as your silence briefly continued. “Oh, no,” you replied after finally coming back to your senses. “Sorry, I just kind of zoned out for a minute.” She hummed and nodded, a small smile toying effortlessly at the corners of her lips.

For a split second, you found yourself gawking at her again. Before she could catch you a second time, however, you coerced yourself to instead listen to the crunching of the gravel beneath your feet as they carried you forward, your eyes dropping to watch them do so. The cool wind that grazed over your skin was welcome in comparison to the burning sensation building up in your face, and you were unable to bite back a small huff of relief when it cooled and dried the droplets of sweat forming on your brow. Curiously, Rose glanced your way at the sound, though she looked ahead again when you said nothing more.

“So,” she started after walking a few more paces, “any ideas on what you want to do after high school? I mean, I know you told me about the college you want to go to and what you want to major in, but any plans for anything else?”

“Anything else?” You echoed. “What do you mean?”

Just as yours had done only a moment prior, Rose’s face seemed to burn scarlet red, though she quickly averted her eyes and turned her head to hide it. Forming a fist and bringing it up to cover her mouth, she cleared her throat and nodded. “Yeah, like…” She shrugged, though it seemed more like she was trying to get something off her shoulders than being casual about it. “I don’t know. Maybe start dating someone, or… do something else?” She scoffed. “I don’t know.” It hurt your heart to see her seem so anxious about something, but her tone and timidness brought a sense of endearment as well.

“Oh,” you blurted, mirroring her actions and turning away to hide the betrayal of your reddening features. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make it awkward,” she murmured with a defeated sigh.

You desperately wanted to tell her she didn’t make anything awkward, wanted her to know there was nothing to feel guilty about, but it would be a blatant lie to say things weren’t uncomfortable. Instead, all you could offer up was a whispered “it’s okay.”

As the world around you quietened and settled to make way for the rising moon, your mind raced and scrambled for something more to say. “Well,” you squeaked out eventually. “I don’t know about dating anyone, but it would be nice to find a steady job so college doesn’t completely kick my ass.” A quiet chuckle slipped from her lips, though she seemed disappointed in your answer, her eyebrows creasing as though she had been expecting something else. Hoping for something else.

“Yeah,” was her only reply.

When your eyes finally wandered over to look at her, she seemed further away, her eyes slightly dull and that smile gone from her face entirely. Upon noticing this shift in her demeanor, you found yourself determined to cheer her up, eyes flickering around the area almost frantically for an escape from this tense atmosphere you had unintentionally built.

A few paces ahead was a bench, clear of other people and free from any potential prying eyes. As you crossed through the grass, Rose watched you with a hint of confusion, quickly trailing behind and ultimately joining you on the bench. Before any other thoughts could form, one thought in particular made itself known to you, one that had you crumbling slightly from fear.

It seemed the short-lived discussion of dating seemed to be the cause of her deflated charisma. Maybe bringing it up again in a different light would spark that gleam in her eyes again.

While your hands fiddled restlessly with the hem of your shirt, Rose looked around silently at the empty park, the tree behind the bench nearly drowning the both of you in total darkness as the sun continued to fall beneath the horizon. It took some time before she noticed your shuffling, though her face was quick to contort with concern when she did. “You alright?”

“Yeah, I just,” a quick clearing of your throat was made as an attempt to conceal the way your voice shook and cracked. “Can I be honest with you about something?” She nodded. “Of course.” “It has to do with what we were talking about earlier. About dating someone?” At your words, she seemed to perk up, a strange concoction of emotions flooding behind her gaze.

Even with the darkening shadows dimming any clarity given by her features, she made it evident that she had taken a sudden interest in what you had to say. She was eager.

You heard the rustling of her sleeves as her arms lurched forward toward you, only to falter and return to her sides, and could still make out the silhouette and the curve of her face when she winced at her own actions. You paid no mind to it, knowing that what you were wanting to say would probably bring you more grief than what she felt.

“I do actually like someone,” you mumbled, shying away from her gaze when it returned to you. “But will you promise me you won’t freak out if I tell you who it is?”

As if the incident from before had been replayed, she physically deflated at your words all over again.

“Uh,” she whispered, looking down unsurely.

“Yeah, sure. I promise.”

Her tone made you hesitate for a moment. If she was this upset just by you mentioning you had feelings for someone, how would she react to you admitting who it was? Before you could lose the nerve, you forced yourself to speak. “Well, she’s special to me. Ever since I met her, she’s done nothing but make me happy, and I feel like I can actually be myself around her. I feel… safe and secure with her, and I’ve honestly been picturing myself with her in the future.”

Each passing word seemed to crush Rose more and more, though you continued with this seemingly brutal torture anyway.

“She’s beautiful, and funny, and smart, and strong, and talented, and I didn’t realize how important she is to me until recently. I want to tell her how I feel and see if she feels the same, but I need you to be honest with me. Do you think she’d feel the same way?”

Bitterly, she shrugged and shifted her hands to toy with her fingers. “Depends,” she responded bluntly. “Who is it?”

“It’s you, Rose.”

For an agonizingly silent moment, all she could do was stare down at her hands, and you wondered to yourself if she had even heard you at all. Just as you parted your lips to repeat yourself, her head lifted and turned to you. The pale lighting from the slowly rising moon caressed her face, allowing you to see the starstruck expression that riddled her features. Shakily, she lifted her finger to point at herself. “Me?” She asked in disbelief, a scarlet red hue dusting across her cheeks.

When you nodded, it only took half a second before that gleaming smile you adored more than life itself broke out across her lips. “Oh,” she blurted, shrinking into herself a bit while her chipped nails tapped at the backs of her knuckles, her grin never fleeing.

Her eyes, although you couldn’t see them clearly in the little light provided, flickered down for a moment in thought before returning to your own gaze. “You’ve been picturing a future together with me?” You hummed and nodded, soft prickles bubbling up on the back of your neck as your mind tried to convince you of every possible way she could reject you then. The thumping of your heart skipped with fear when she laughed, and your head dipped down to hide your face.

“I never thought you’d actually feel the same way,” she confessed, hands writhing against one another. The moment the words left her lips, you found yourself glancing back up at her, eyes wide and mouth agape in shock. “You like me too?” Another soft chuckle. “Yeah, of course I do. I honestly thought I was horrible at hiding it, but apparently not.”

The corners of her lips perked up into a sly smirk. “Or maybe you’re just a little too dense for it.” Playfully, you smacked the side of her arm, which prompted another joyful laugh that you could never get enough of. Slowly, her hand slid over to cover yours and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “But in all seriousness, I really do like you. I’ve been wanting to tell you that for a while now, but I couldn’t bring myself to. I really didn’t think you would feel the same way.”

Tilting your head to the side, you gave a look of confusion. “What? Why wouldn’t I like you? You’re only, like, the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

She tucked her hair back out of her face before offering a small shrug as a response. Your question seemed to bring her a feeling of discomfort, and although you weren’t sure why, you were quick to try and think of a way to cheer her up again. Before you were able to speak, however, she answered you properly.

“Well, I mean… to be fair, I haven’t always exactly been liked. Before I met you, I had never actually fallen in love with anyone. Mainly because I’ve never been close to anyone before, but also because you’re the only person I actually feel safe with. I feel like I can be myself around you – like I finally mean something. You make me feel like I’m normal in all the best ways. Chris is nice, but he and the others have only raised me to be a bioweapon for them, and they don’t hide the fact that that’s how they see me. You, though… You make me feel human. You make me feel like I’m a real person who has her own purpose – her own life and future.

“And if I’m being honest? As corny as this is going to sound, I don’t want to live in any future for myself if you’re not in it. I was worried that if I confessed how I felt to you, you’d think I was weird or gross and wouldn’t want to be around me anymore. That’s why I kept trying to hide how I feel. I didn’t want to lose you.”

Each passing word only caused your smile to grow. As she spoke, you flipped your hand around in hers, allowing you to finally lace your fingers with hers. When she fell silent again, you gave her hand a small squeeze, similar to how she had done to you shortly before. “Well, now you don’t have to worry about it anymore. You know I feel the same, and you know I want to have a future with you.”

Slowly, she rose to her feet, then turned and helped you stand to look her in the eye. Even with the blackening shadows, you could still see the smitten gleam in her eyes, paired with the seemingly permanent smile on her lips. “Yeah, I guess you’re right,” she whispered.

“So what does that make us?” You stepped forward, arms flying out to encircle her and pull her flush against your body, prompting a small yelp to sound from her. As quickly as you had reached for her, she all but melted into your touch and held you just as tightly in return. “Well, I’d like to be your girlfriend,” you replied. “But only if you feel the same.”

Her shoulders shook slightly against you as she laughed, her fingernails digging in lightly to your shirt as she nodded. “Of course I feel the same, you dork. I’d love nothing more than to be able to call you mine.”