#honestly i kinda have a feeling i know who this is lmao
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I think I was in denial the entire time because deep down he seemed like a genuine guy. Obviously we don’t know what actually went down but let’s be so for real yall🙄 and the pap walk AT THEIR GROWN AGE??? When I first saw it I knew it was staged which makes me wonder how legit the relationship is..
I definitely feel for the kids, it hits too close to home and I can just imagine what they’re feeling. I think the hype around Hugh will definitely die down and he’ll see/feel the lack of fan support—according to what I’ve witnessed on Twitter😭
But lowkey—and I can’t believe I’m admitting it—kinda wanna see their downfall. As much as I love his movies and work, we don’t deal with infidelity here. ALSO, people on Twitter uncovered some stuff about sf doing some racist shit, so that’s happening lmao, karma’s a bitch
right like we don’t know know but we’re all pretty smart to read between the lines ☹️ seeing the confirmation and flaunting of adultery is just so … idk
as someone who’s seen how cheating hurts people, especially your mom, it’s hard to understand or feel sympathy for either of them. if youre not happy with your spouse, don’t be a coward about it.
i saw that! her being racist just adds to this and yk what racists never age well so good for her tbh
i honestly have nothing to say but i do feel silly defending him when he’s just flashed his affair in everyone’s face
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Here are some of my favorites I've watched (more like finally watched lmao) in 2024:
Self-explanatory 🤡🎀
I love Christmas horror! It's such a niche genre and I feel like a lot of horror fans don't want to give it a chance.
Black Christmas is a classic so it's a must watch. It's one of the oldest ones on my list which just proves that it really is holding up well after more than 50 years! There's no blood or gore (a lot of R rated language tho) so it's a plus if you like your horror without those. I really liked the atmosphere in this one, it's both very festive and anxiety inducing. Really liked the characterization too, most characters feel like real people. Also Olivia Hussey??? HELLO?? It's a must watch just because of this Queen alone ❤️. Silent Night Deadly Night again another classic! Before watching this one I read about it being almost banned because it was too gory, but to be honest it's not that bad people! It's actually kinda corny but still a very fun watch. Compared to Black Christmas this one is definitely more of a slasher Christmas film though so expect some low budget filmmaking. However, Robert Brian Wilson totally slayed (literally and figuratively) as Billy.
Christmas Evil is imo one of those "so bad it's good" films. It's my guilty pleasure Christmas slasher just because it's sooo audacious? The stuff that happens in this film is so insane the writers must've been on something 😭. The main protagonist, Harry, is a middle-aged toy-factory worker who wants to BE Santa Claus. He spies on the neighborhood kids and writes "naughty" and "nice" lists. At one point, Harry steals a ton of toys and just starts giving them out to kids on Christmas. The plot sounds so simple but the film is just so surreal, it feels like a fever dream. Honestly, it's the AUDACITY for me. This plot is SUPER corny but idk it just works and the film is unintentionally hilarious.
Won't babble too much about these, I should've watched them ages ago. Sleepy Hollow was more enjoyable than I thought! For some reason, Tim Burton's films aren't really my thing but this was a nice surprise because it DOES feel very Burtonesque? It's more of a "10yr olds first scary movie" but idc, I got scared a few times lmao. American Psycho truly is the DIVA of horror. Enough said 💅.
I don't even know if The Menu can be classified as horror, even though it has a lot of horror elements. Still I really liked it! I thought the premise was unique and well executed (no pun intended). There's also a nice little twist at the end so I really recommend it! Also, Anya Taylor-Joy ❤️.
Not me shivering while watching The Conjuring 😭. I swear this is the ONLY horror film that has actually done that to me! Horror films with religious undertones really do spook me the most I guess. The sound design is PHENOMENAL in this one, so if you like to get scared I really recommend this one (I've watched the second film in the series but the first Conjuring is still way more spooky). Smile was also a pleasant surprise. A friend recommended it to me even though we have vastly different taste. I'm not really the psychological horror type but Smile really was solid! I know this is an unpopular opinion but Smile 2 kinda pales in comparison to 1 in my opinion. The reason I liked the first so much was because it looked so gritty and ofc the reveal of the monster was at the very end for just a few minutes. I feel like the protag being a psychiatrist and still not being able to deal with her inner turmoil contributed more to the monster's scare factor. Don't get me wrong, I LOVED Naomi Scott's performance, I think she really deserves all the praise, but the second film kinda felt more cartoonish to me? I think it might be because of the abundance of jumpscares and the CGI was everywhere so the monster ended up looking more goofy in my eyes (like- creepypasya tier goofy). Smile 2 was still an okay film but I def recommend the first one!
favorite horror films you watched in 2024? here are mine:
i really started getting into horror this year but in 2025 i will have more movies 😋
tagging @dominionatrix @artsfavoritehorn @xenoanamorph @justajollyclown @evilvvithin @garlic-the-gnome @fatal-feast @aviesaurusrex @clownyclaushoe @thatspookyghoul996 @milescounty & anyone else who wants to participate <3
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For context I got permission to show everyone these from @half-oz-eddie
I'm sorry anon, are you unaware about what a Maid Cafe is? The point is people regardless of gender are either maids or butlers. I'm SO SO sorry your transphobic ass feels so uncomfortable about the concept of male characters wearing nail polish and lip stick
And that "some have lipstick that's too much" that's Lord Billy, an Resident Evil Village x Stranger Things AU yours truly (me). Lord Billy is genderfluid.
You're frankly a coward to sit there on anon and type those words to the @harringrove-cafe which was designed to bring joy to people's day. We don't tolerate this type of behaviour towards the Cafe OR in the harringrove and Billy Hargrove fandom in general.
Come off of anon and say that shit with your WHOLE chest since you have plenty of words to say about what Billy and the other male characters should and shouldn't wear. Cisgender males wear lipstick and nail polish in real life, does that give you the heebie jeebies too?
You're actually pathetic, get the fuck out of here and back to the vile river of hate that you came from. You're not welcome here.
To everyone else: please show the Cafe alot of love. We artists all had a fun time drawing these for the maid Cafe event!
#harringrove#billy hargrove#steve harrington#billy x steve#harringrove cafe#anon hate#fandom wank#transphobia#honestly i kinda have a feeling i know who this is lmao#lemme get the raid bug spary#we got a cockroach in here
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BILLDUMP TIME (with transparency, because I can). Don't mind me, I'm just yeeting my goofy art at some way more talented individuals out of nowhere and then hauling ass back to the security of being a weird silent lurker ahaha
@tesscourtes and @beccadrawsstuff, respectively! These two Bills make a little prism of sorts together because of their recent crossovers on Patreon~ :3c Speaking of which, I highly recommend supporting both these artists! They do fantastic work! (TessCourtes and Beccup)
@qoolk on the left, and @monobmp on the right! I am such a sucker for these outfits~ OuO Go and check these two out, their art is phenomenal!!! >u<
@1spooky2me The most difficult Bill of the lot for me to draw, ahaha... Their art is so incredibly consistent and dynamic, I am, a little envious <:,) A little envious, but mostly impressed, so go look at their amazing art, what are you waiting for
And finally, @ckret2, whose writing is sublimely in-character and just a delight to read - they're a great artist, as well! I simply Could Not resist drawing their Bill in this ridiculous incredible and very fashionable pink feather dress, even though he only briefly wears it in their fic, so I also did a little bonus doodle of him in his standard hoodie to make up for it. XD (Also, as far as I'm concerned, Bill and Mabel were both correct in that lime green accessories make the dress Much Better.)
This is just a small selection of the human Bill designs I enjoy. I may draw and post more later on, who knows! Feel free to reblog with some neat Bill designs, either your own or by other folks - if any of the designs particularly call to me, I'll add them to the little list I've got going~ :D (Alternatively, if you really like my stuff and want me to draw something specific, you could...mmm...perhaps, commission me...? OuO)
Also I'm tagging Billford because uhhhh yeah, sorry not sorry, every single one of these Bills is getting shipped with Ford by the artists in some way or another, lmao
#fanart#gravity falls#bill cipher#human bill cipher#human bill design#billford#bill is just so Gender#regardless of whether or not he's a triangle. just. such Gender. wow#honestly tempted to draw the OG twink!bill and the mangopablo save-the-town!bill just for funzies#i may also attempt to draw alex hirsch's “canon” human!bill but uhhhh who knows LOL#i kinda feel like he made the design extra ugly just to poke fun at the fandom#so the “canon” aspect of it is kinda up in the air for me personally LMAO#not sure if i drew goldilocks!bill thicc enough tbh#just. look. it's hard to draw a person who is as close to triangular as a human can possibly get. ok??? ok#I TRIED AND THAT'S WHAT'S IMPORTANT OnO#in other news why did these turn out so much better than the drawings of my own design??? wtf that's so rude#get it together ME this is fukken embarrassing#btw if i draw something for you and you respond to thank me only to have me say nothing back it's because i am very awkward and anxious lol#there is also the adhd which makes me forget that i failed to respond like a normal person would have ahahahaha o-o#but mostly it's the horrors of being perceived for more than the two seconds it takes to yeet an art at a person O-O#why am i like this? good question! maybe i'll have an answer someday when i can actually afford therapy XD#I SHOULD HAVE BEEN ASLEEP FIVE HOURS AGO
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debate
(topic: how many and what configuration of kids do they give off vibes of having (either at present or in the future)(partner is irrelevant in most cases, some could be single parents for all i care))
#the blue tier should be 'two or more' my bad#all tiers make no difference between adopted and biological kids with the obvious exception of the ones exclusively abt adopted kids#basically all of the tiers above could be adopted too it doesn't matter#the ones in the young category don't necesarily all give off vibes of having no kids#more that i can't picture it but it's not bc of personality. it literally is just bc they look too young#like obv most characters on the younger side outside of that tier are under the assumption that the kid appears in the future#but the young tier is just i am incapable of deciding bc i can't look at their face and my perceived age of them and reach a decision#hu tao is the exception i just cannot see her having kids#this is also assuming they'd all be decent parents. doesn't mean those in the no kids tier are there bc they'd be bad parents tho#heizou lovers feel free to give your hc i just don't know who your man is lmao#yall get done so dirty by the game#like tbh i'd put him in the no kids tier but i am aware i know very little of him so. erring on the side of caution here#honestly alhaitham could be in the one girl category also now that i think about it. nb kid for that man specifically#there are some characters y'all won't be able to convince me otherwise but like. i'm curious anyway#the parentheses are the reasoning for the choice not necesarily their actual kid obviously#the natlan gang is up in the air. kinda confident abt the mualani choice but kinich? not so much#realistically i could see plenty of them not having any kids but decided to keep the no kids tier as empty as possible in the interest of#y'know actually thinking about it. the ones there are bc i simply couldn't see it. ganyu and sethos are on thin ice tho
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link click yingdu ep 1 is truly the gift that keeps on giving the more you think about it the more layers you unlock. at first i thought the 'video call with phone in shirt pocket' trick is a pretty effective way of replicating their dives with like.. normal human technology without their powers and then i realised that's probably because lu guang specifically thought 'this is a situation that would call for a dive except cheng xiaoshi doesn't know about the whole time travel powers thing yet, what would be a good and reasonable approximation of that that i can spring on him rn'. also, we know this is not the first time he's experiencing this day because he was checking the clock before he proposed the whole video call phone camera thing, implying that he had the 'script' for this day just like he did with the anime convention, but even then he could only warn cheng xiaoshi about the guy behind him with the bat right before he was about to get hit - probably because cheng xiaoshi kept 'doing unnecessary actions' and messing up the timeline/lu guang's 'script' and forcing him to improvise. once again, lu guang's trying to protect cheng xiaoshi while also hiding information from him and cheng xiaoshi's failing to follow lu guang's instructions and putting himself in danger because of his own kindness and impulsivity - their entire dynamic moving forwards, captured in their first (arguably more like.. the 0th) 'job' together.
#link click#shiguang dailiren#link click yingdu#link click spoilers#yingdu spoilers#lu guang#cheng xiaoshi#you know this show's good cuz the first bloody ep got me writing a gooddamn paragraph about it (something i generally dislike doing#unless i got a demon i really desperately need to let out. idk im not really a metas guy)#(writing these always make me feel like the literature troll)#one other kinda funny thought that i had was like#when vivian was talking to cheng xiaoshi about scammers exploiting people's emotional weak spots like#'people's compassion for the weak' is explicitly about cxs and 'the grief of losing family' could also very easily be about him#which leaves uh. 'people's need for (romantic) love' (i forgot the exact phrasing idk i wasnt looking at the english subs)#like i was thinking abt this and then she brought up 'the person calling your name on the other end of your phone' and cxs immediately goin#'dont you dare hurt my FRIEND' is just. im sorry its such a funny transition. like sure my guy#i also like that the scammers knew cxs's name bc of lg's yelling through the phone i thought that was a nice touch#once again the idea that cxs's safety is the one thing that makes lg drop all his rationality and start making Poor Decisions#(and also confirms that he did Not have the script for cxs getting knocked out lmao poor guy)#guy honestly trying his damn best to maintain the timeline vs guy who's just really talented at creating butterfly effects#asto speaks
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he's still just a voluntary victim and I still love him for it :]
Day 5 of Jashtober: Angel!!!
bonus under the cut- wait how do I add cuts in pc HOW DO I ADD CUTS IN PC-
-oh there we go
ahem
version with uncolored lines + background + timelapse!!!
#similarly to the d1 drawing I knew I had to draw Mr Heart but I didn't know what to draw lmao#and then I remembered that one Mad IQs Heart I drew once and thought ''hey I should redraw hat for the funsies''#and then this came out#honestly I love the brush I did the lineart with :]#it was so fun to use :]#and who knew I could get better at the artstyle I've had for like a year lmao#I think this one is more expressive :]#talking about expressions the expression I was going for was kinda ''inoffensive'' + smug + kinda nervous#I wanted to give sorta a feeling that the inoffensive look Heart had was actually not genuine and was just him pretending so he can be-#-more likeable so he can have a little more control#(he does mean well tho he just does what he thinks is right in a really not so nice way (manipulation n stuff))#ily morally gray characters <333333 /p#anyways time to tag!!!#AJV Heart#cj heart#heart chonny jash#chonny jash fanart#jashtober 2024
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Under the cut are mostly self-insert doodles of decreasing quality. Again, not much directly tied to Team Fortress 2. Might as well toss these out while I have no access to my puter. Much yapping under the cut and in the tags incoming.
Another self-insert, this time less of a "here's me as a tenth class" and more of a "here's my game experiences translated into the class I would take the place of". The Cleaner. Although I guess they could still be wearing either suit. It doesn't matter that much.
That one Convict's Case taunt with Backup would be extremely funny, because the man would be on the verge of a breakdown (he does not want to go to jail so bad you have no idea). The second image- I owe no explanation. You know what I am. You see the pattern with my favourites.
The duality of the man. Resting face versus "just heard you express interest in religion/Russian folklore" face. He's not that hard to make friends with, when you pull him away from all the explosions.
Some doodles of trying to figure his face out. Unfortunately, the more I stare at him, the more I worry that he looks like A Certain Guy With The Last Name "Kazarin", and the fear of never being original in my life caught up to me.
Don't look at me, don't perceive me, I refuse to explain any of my actions to you.
#team fortress 2#tf2#that's it that's the only tags i am putting this in. maybe someday i will have the balls to do more but for now that's about it#while i have the chance - and since posts with more of my yapping in the tags don't pop in people's feeds much - i might as well ramble-#-about these guys here. self-inserts or not i'm projecting only half of my bullshit on each one of them. creativity 👍#backup is tall and pale and has sharp canines and more of a dull brown hair colour with tired grey eyes. no amount of babyface or soft-#-hands can really help a motherfucker when he's grimacing so much because he just Hates being around half the people on the team.#cleaner meanwhile is on the shorter side and has constantly flushed skin and brighter colours and whatnot. you can't see it because of the-#-mask most of the time but they do smile a lot more and have a more cheery disposition towards life and see the whole team as their friends!#backup transitioned fully (albeit not very legally lmao) and is scared shitless of not being seen as a man although the last time that ever-#-came up was years ago. he holds onto his last name as part of the heritage he loves and loathes at the same time - attached to his culture-#-and religion and bloodline while also resentful of his family and the regime he knows someone else on the team suffered under.#cleaner just kinda binds and calls it a day. he only does it to confuse the team because while he doesn't identify with being a girl he-#-loves the confused looks his epic gender reveal moment gets. they do not remember their family name or where they grew up or what even got-#-them to this kind of mental state. and he's chill with it he values the here and now way more than some dark edgy backstory.#backup despite trying to be an honest man is afraid of vulnerability as well. he stubbornly refuses to express love towards certain people-#-lest they feel disgusted and turn away. he's afraid of consequences afraid of losing the people he loves afraid of his ''interests'' being-#-what drives them away. it doesn't by the way and he just wasted time being a cold indecisive loser for several months lmao#cleaner wears a suit that hides all of them yes but they pretty much never lie. he is always his truest self and he can always just burn-#-people who don't like him enough to make it a problem. they are a lot more comfortable indulging in their interests - be they innocent-#-and juvenile or violent and dangerous. he is quite open with his affection and his fascinations that backup would rather keep secret.#i want to establish that these two can only exist in separate universes because they both have feelings towards the funny assistant lady-#-and the funny inventor guy (selfshipping for the winnn) and would fight over those two. cleaner would win by the way#it's also a really funny point of comparison. cleaner is objectively more fucked up than backup and still managed to be more normal about-#-their feelings and live as a healthier and happier person than that guy. comedic gold honestly#OKAY I'M DONE if you read up to here you get uhhh a cookie :-)
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I know it’s probably just my age and I’m Too Young To Possibly Get It and You Had To Be There but I’ve always kinda rolled my eyes whenever people talk about how joss whedon was some titan of nerd media and everyone loved his work
avengers came out when I was 13 and I thought that was. all right. at the time, everyone on the internet was nostalgic for firefly, so I watched that and found it extremely underwhelming, and wasn’t interested in seeking out more of that writing. but it is inescapable huh
#was gonna post this on my main but i have way more followers there and also what inspired this was#reading gaider’s post about alistair lol#yes we can in fact tell he was inspired by buffy#the part where he’s like ‘yea he’s persona non grata NOW but he used to be the shit’ citation needed lmao#and it’s always made me kinda roll my eyes#he’s fine. i like him as a character. but everywhere i go there’s been whedon worship#and now that he’s fallen out of grace people feel like they need to do penance for it#when i’ve. never understood it in the first place lol#obviously i’m one person and my opinions aren’t universal either but#i feel like everyone who talks about it is like ‘yeah he’s shitty BUT it’s good’#i guess you had to be there#but when i say i don’t like him now it sounds like im lying or just joining the people who are canceling him#hipster moment. i didn’t like him before it was cool#it’s just the writing style. i’ve talked about it a little before on my main#it’s especially insidious still in SFF novels bc once again. they’ve all seen buffy and firefly and#i remember my older sister liked angel but i’m p sure she had a crush on him#when will i finally be at the age where the things i grew up liking are the influence behind the Hot New Thing#i mean i know the issue is that the things i liked as a kid weren’t popular then either lmao#like i’m sorry but one man from 15 years ago cannot be the sole pillar of an entire genre#people need to diversify their influences and/or we need to let other people write stuff#honestly whedon’s style feels like he was going for american terry pratchett but it’s like. a little mean spirited about it#personal.txt
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.
#holidays have not been what i hoped for so far 😔😔#well the first week was good but then i got sick 😭#and it's been so awful#having a cough is literally the worst i couldn't sleep it was so bad#and i couldn't even enjoy doing anything really because you can't properly focus on the thing bc ur coughing non stop#i hate it sm#and today it was gone all day only that now it is back altough not as bad as before but still#it always gets worse in the evening#like help i just want this to end#what made it even worse i had real plans to study and now i barely got anything done 😭😭#and now i'm scared for exams bc i couldn't follow the plan altough i still have more than 2 and 3 weeks left#in my mind i already think i'm gonna do badly bc i need to study more i'm afraid#and i'm also upset at myself even though it's not my fault i got sick but i keep thinking i still could have done more ughh#to make it even worse i coudn't play tennis for a whole week and i was so looking forward to playing everyday (and improving) 😢😢#i couldn't do any sports or see anyone i miss it sm#i hope at least in the new year i can do stuff again 🥺#it was just the worst cold/flu and idk why whenever i get it it's that extreme 😵💫#or idk is it normal that you can't sleep bc of it ... i just don't wanna get sick again ever lmao it's the worst#i guess christmas was still nice it wasn't that bad then and it was a lovely day with my family :)#and our tree was really pretty this year and i'm really happy with my gifts and also those i gifted 🥰#the week before was good i did play lots of tennis and i went on a christmas market with uni friend and to vienna for a trip with my mom ^^#but maybe it was too much sometimes i wonder if i do something wrong or if it is just bad luck like i did train a lot#and i played a tennis match for my club and won against a higher ranked opponent so yay 😁#and i played really well i feel like i once again really improved my level :)) but i did play kinda sick already so maybe that was rly bad😅#maybe i should stop doing that 😅 but i didn't know it's gonna get this bad i just had the worst headache and sore throat#well ig i should have known but i also always feel like i have to play and i love matches and like my team needs me?#who else would have won that? i'm one of the best at my team and the others who are rly good weren't there that day so i felt responsible 😅#honestly my mom possibly she is also quite good but it would have been close and i wasn't sure so i played 😅#but i have done this too often by now... playing sick i really can't help myself 🤦♀️
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plot twist update on my gf catching my cold: turns out i caught her cold, and it’s definitely something a little worse than a cold but maybe not quite as severe as the flu
#continuing to test negative and i don’t wanna waste my time on a trip to urgent care bc i don’t /think/ it’s the flu idk#though it would put my silly little heart at ease if my gf went to urgent care and got checked out because she’s been sick longer than me#ugh#yearning hours honestly#also coughing and sniffling and itchy hours#kinda self obs#i forgot i have negative luck when it comes to getting sick LMAO#whatever#she’s worth it and i don’t feel that bad at all#which makes me wonder if maybe it is the flu and i just have immunity or something from having it last month ????#i made that up somebody is gonna tell me exactly why that is stupid and how it actually works#but at first my brain was like i can’t have the flu again like six weeks later right….#at least not the same strain#and she doesn’t usually get sick easily or this sick#while i’m the opposite but the poor baby is definitely worse off than me#rambling again see how i wander#who knows…who knows#realized i forgot to finish that thought up there ^ but by ‘immunity’ i mean like#maybe that’s why it’s not as severe lol little booster to the flu shot i got a month too late
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long tag ramble below u have been warned
#ok i feel like i should say Something before i start being active again#but i dont want it to be a Statement which is why i’m putting it in the tags#(also bc i procrastinated doing this for weeks so i know this is a very stale topic by now#but i also haven’t been on tumblr literally at all so this is 100% my organic authentic opinion lmao)#so read if you gaf and ignore if you don’t#anyway: george def could’ve done more to ensure she was comfortable#and as someone who has also gotten in over my head with older men and regretted it#her hurt is valid and i’m deeply sorry she feels the way she does about that night#but with that said i see no reason to believe george Should have known how she really felt#or that he deliberately took advantage of either her youth/inexperience or her discomfort#and that’s the most important thing for me— he fucked up and misread a situation but that doesn’t make him an evil person#and i hope they can both move on and grow and heal#as for my future in the fandom: i honestly dunno how active i’ll be going forward#i was already becoming pretty disconnected so this might’ve just sped up the process? i’m tired of being put through the wringer#but i also don’t really have a fandom to replace this so i might just continue casually participating in the way i have been#either way rest assured i will never become a rabid anti. that shits embarrassing#i got HORRIBLE drolo rsd the other day when tommy’s mom needed clout and vagued him so like if nothing else. droloisms are forever#also as a last thing— this feels kinda silly and self centered to say but i will anyway#sorry for not opening up my blog as a forum for discussion again the way i did with the drituation#i know i helped a lot of people sort out their feelings and that was (and is) really really important to me#but it also tanked my mental health (mostly as a result of the fallout and not the act itself but still)#plus my life irl was pretty stressful at the time when everything was first going down#so i just didn’t feel up to putting myself through that again#but i’m sorry if anyone wanted to discuss w me but wasn’t able to#anyway. i think that’s all i have to say!#i don’t want to turn this into a capital D discussion but as always my askbox and dms are open#love you all tons! i hope you’re having a good day 🫂🫶#bella talks
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Hey Ziri how's it going dude?
Snakelet - Chapter 9
@randowhump birthday event - Winged Whump (4) and Hallucinations (14)
Masterpost
Content: Nonhuman/vampire/winged whumpee, pinned to a board, psychosis, maybe unreality?
Figured I'd give you a twofer to make up for lost time, lol. Happy birthday!
~
Ziri jolts with a start at the unfamiliar voice, eyes darting back and forth to find the source.
"Tsk. I told you not to move, little bird," chides the torturer of the day. "Now I'll have to add even more pins."
"P— plea— GAAAAUGH!" He chokes out a scream as they drive another stake into his wing, splitting flesh and bone alike to pin him to a board like a fucking butterfly.
Desperate for a distraction, he focuses on the voice. It seems like it's still just him and his assailant in the room, and even if they did bring another torturer in, they wouldn't just... casually ask something like that. They'd be all gloaty and stupid about it.
It must be a new voice in his head. Wonderful. Like he needs more.
...Unless it's actually—
No. Stop. Stop. It's — probably — not real. And if it is, he'll deal with that problem later, because there's approximately fuck all he can do right now.
Fuck, what was the question again? It was a question, right? It felt like a stupid question.
Ah, right.
He responds in his head, as he does the other conversational voices. Janessa taught him long ago not to respond aloud, not around people who want him to suffer. He does not need help losing touch with reality, especially now.
Not great. Really bad, actually. Horrible. Worst I've ever been.
Another stake shatters his bones and train of thought alike before he can figure out another way to phrase the same thing.
He hopes this voice is one of the nice ones, if it sticks around. Good company is.. sorely needed.
"Last one, birdie."
His throat beyond raw, he cries out at the top of his lungs as they finally, finally, drive the last stake into his wing.
...Second to last. Bastard.
"Gotcha, didn't I?" They laugh. "Nearly done. Just need to take care of your pretty little arms and legs. Those ugly straps are doing them such a disservice..."
A shuddery sob escapes him as they unstrap one of his arms and lift it, no amount of faux gentleness enough to prevent agony shooting through his impaled shoulder.
"Oh, you poor thing. Does it hurt?" They grin as they lazily wobble his limp arm back and forth, further straining the wound. He wants nothing more than to tear it from their grasp, but even without the fear of punishment, he's not sure if he'd have the strength to manage it.
All too happy with his miserable resignation, they fasten a golden manacle to his wrist. It's too tight.
He nearly laughs at the complaint. It's so mundane in comparison to the rest of his suffering.
He clings to the amusement for any trace of comfort when they begin pounding another stake into...
Not him.
Not him.
The chain he hears, probably. With every strike, he has to remind himself that it isn't him. They're clearly relishing in his terror.
Once his arms and legs have all been chained up, the assailant finally steps back, appreciating his work.
"Oh, you're perfect. Don't go anywhere, little bird."
With an infuriating chuckle at their own stupid joke, they finally leave Ziri alone. The silent one resumes gently braiding his hair, and as much as he'd rather not be touched at all, he supposes beggars can't be choosers.
All too soon, the door opens, and the braiding stops. The first piece of shit walks in with another one, who ogles at him uncomfortably before they each grab one side of the board he's been pinned to.
"One, two, three, hup!"
They turn the board horizontal, and a scream claws out of his throat when his body weight suddenly pulls on the stakes impaling him, inflicting an entirely new level of pain. And of course, they make no effort to avoid jostling him as they carry him away.
It's so, so tempting to escape into his own head, but he forces himself to try to process what's going on. He can't risk making a habit of dissociating. As much as every ounce of his brain DESPERATELY wants to. He needs to be present when he gets back. He needs to be useful to Janessa.
For Zop.
For Zop.
For Zop, he strains to pay attention to where he's being carried. But every detail he takes note of is jolted back out by a bump in the ride.
...He's going to get Zop tortured again, at this rate.
Eventually, he can vaguely tell that he's being hung to a wall. Gathered around him are all the bastards with such a vested interest in his misery, ooh-ing and aah-ing at the pitiful display of helpless agony.
The piece of shit who did it stands back, admiring their work.
"You really are gorgeous."
#i might draw/commission this at some point honestly. just gotta decide if ziri bleeds or not#but i think it'll look really pretty either way#also yes i 100% sent the ask to myself lmao. i've had this idea in my head for a while#where ziri's (so far) the only one who can perceive asks (if they're not directed at him they influence events more passively)#not because his psychosis is some trope-y magic power that lets him see through the fourth wall or anything#but just because the asks Aren't Real. the askers aren't physically there in the world. so logically the only way they could be perceived#is if they take the form of something else being perceived that isn't real#randowhumpbirthdaywhump#whumpblr#whump#nonhuman whumpee#winged whumpee#vampire whumpee#objectification#dehumanization#unreality#(just in case. i know sometimes my brain gets weird about real life and fiction “canonically” interacting like this)#hallucination whump#kinda?? idk. does it count? the hallucinations aren't actually the whumpy part. he just has them#they're probably not always this. pleasant? not-unpleasant anyway. like they're almost definitely a problem at other points#but it feels weird explicitly making them part of the whump if i don't have psychosis myself
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there's so many popular repetitive video games that seem so boring to play, but then I watch people stream them with a group of friends, and they make it seem so fun just because the people playing are so lively and goofy and funny. I want that. I want to be part of a group of streamers or at least group of friends that make receptive and otherwise boring games fun and hilarious. a group that's not boring, serious, competitive. one that cares more about having fun and laughing than completing the video game objective 😭
#like the currenr one lethal company#it doesnt look fun at all and looks like it would get boring fast. UNLESS you have hilarious friends to laugh with#which i lack. i dont have enough friends and most people i know and would play co op games are too serious and boring#people probably think the same of me. im generally quiet and confused when playing games and bad at them#usually people get mad at me for being bad or goofing around so its never fun. but the fun people never invite me#probably because they thjnk im the boring one. but i absorb energy like a sponge!!!!! be silly and funny and i will too!#i really need a group of people with great silly fun energy who i csn feed off of. i miss laughing. i need to laugh. i never laugh anymore😐#lee rambles#every time i tried playing with people i know I honestly got so bored. I feel bad because they're the only ones nice enough to play with me.#but they're too serious and not funny. so I haven't played with them in like a year at least and am afraid to ask lmao#why do the silly fun people avoid me and only the serious boring people would agree...i need an energy boost#i need a person to be my battery. where do i get a battery#want to play l4d2 again. its been a while. its so hard to fill the lobby and the couple people that used to play with me arent funny 😅#if i could get a group of silly funny weirdos together then id try lethal company. but i wont try with boring groups#there's so many games i bought to play with people and got ditched that could use a goofy group too. sighs.#why am i still rambling. i dont even have the energy to speak to multiple people at once and play a game#but maybe that's why i need a battery#anyway i kinda really miss doing silly goofy rp and regular gaming hasnt been able to replace the laughter that brought me 😭😭#i need a good laugh. cant remember last time i laughed until i cried. laughing makes me feel good for a bit sighs. someone make me laugh pls
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Mfs can't understand a blunt mf they always gotta try and read between the lines or straight up deny the words you're saying and deny how you feel
#I just woke up so Imma overshare without worrying abt it lmao#like yeah people should be wary there are some messed up people out there but like#I'm being straight up with you I do not have the energy to keep up a lie and I just think it is much easier to have clear communication#people just instantly assume that I'm up to something or not being sincere they don't even give me a chance#bcuz if they did they would instantly be able to tell that I am just like that and I am being as straight up as I possibly can#people just aren't use to that ig#¯\_(ツ)_/¯ that's why I just assume everyone is telling the truth to me and if they did lie my trust in them would break thru those lies#they will eventually tell me the truth if they feel they can trust me and if they don't then that is their business#if someone spends all their time formulating lies for me then that is /their/ energy wasted. not mine lmao#just like let go bro it ain't a big deal to just say stuff straight up you just gotta figure out the right ways to say stuff is all#ya just gotta be real with urself and sometimes shit it confusing af and that is normal brains tend to just fuck around#situations aren't black and white so you might seem hypocritical but again that's life#the best you can do is show how you feel thru actions when words fail you#and people might not understand you but at least you know how you are and you either accept it or make efforts to get better#~.~ me when I get too into it listen I got a little sibling who doesn't understand lots of stuff like I'm trying to teach them things#so I kinda go into this mode a lot of just like trying to explain stuff mostly abt understanding emotions and that other people feel things#I also talk abt this stuff with my other sibling but they are older so it's usually a lot of trying to figure out brain stuff#and trying to come to an understand etc etc I like to talk about these types of things and I might not have all the answer but like#I try. it doesn't work for everyone but hopefully it can at least help people discover what DOES help them#like it might seem like I value honesty a lot but I honestly don't care if people lie to me that is their business ✌️😋#like it only bothers me when it's obvious like Oh I didn't put that dish there I put it somewhere else Well buddy ur the only other person#who else did it or like Oh I didn't say anything I didn't say a word and it's like Buddy I know you did it just own up it's over with#people lie a lot in an attempt to avoid getting in trouble and specifically people getting angry at them but like I'm not the type to argue#I'm not gonna get mad and if I do I'll cool down pretty easily as long as we actually talk things out but like I don't get mad often#I don't really mind most things like if you talk shit behind my back that's not my business lmao just goes to show ur own character#like so many things are not my problem and simply show ur own judge of character#if you don't like me simply don't talk to me 😌 it's really not a big deal I don't mind at all#anyway I ramble... I could likely ramble more but I assume Imma run outta tag space soon
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def made a post bout this before but Heaven Knows Im Not Hunting For It anyway how public. yall think sawashiro was once aoki became governor right.... like do we know what im asking rn.......
#snap chats#of course ill elaborate in the tags#god hang on. chest pain. YEAH NO I FOUND OUT THE FOOD I HAD EARLIER HAD LENTILS IN IT#AND IM SEVERELY ALLERGIC TO LENTILS SO THATS WHY IVE BEEN DYING#anyway no Elaboration Time#cause im ASSUMING the public didnt know about aokis connections to the yakuza.....#and im sure they'd recognize an Omi Alliance Pin the second they saw it..... so like...#i dont think he's REGULARLY walkin round with dude in tow.....#still laughing at sawashiro tagging along to the hospital like Bro Why Are You Here..... Who Invited You.....#jo the fuck're you doing when you aren't shoved into the closet in aoki's office like what do you DO dawg#feels like he kinda does just float in space... i mean he was there for the whole Dinner Debacle#so its not like Divorce happened and he's not rockin with arakawa anymore#i guess it's not impossible to imagine bro does work with arakawa he just. sometimes bounces over to aoki's office#yeah that makes sense Fair Nuff#'snap why are you asking this' well FOR YOUR INFORMATION ive ALWAYS wondered but also it's relevant to a comic i might make#it's nothing major if sawashiro Is a weird little secret it just means i have to mod my comic idea a bit#but honestly maybe not much.... naw i already have a vision for it OK Im Set For Later Then. Still Wanna Know Tho.#oh yeah. ive given up writing tonight LMAO#I TOLD YALL NEVER TRUST ME WHEN I SAY SOMETHING I ALMOST DONE#writing just feels so stale to me i feel like whatever im writing isnt actually interesting#oh well. still gonna push through with it im just tired rn LMAO#and since streaming's gonna start sooner i really should sleep sooner..
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