#honestly I could have written a stronger title

[askbadlydrawnalfred]

[earlgreytea68]

Just a quick thought dump, but "Bishop's Knife Trick" popped up on my playlist today, and I can't help but wonder if the lyrics "These are the last blues we're ever gonna have" were written at least in part as a promise to Patrick. The hiatus could have crumbled everything they built together, but they still came back stronger than ever, and now nothing can tear them apart again!

That line is, in typical Pete Wentz style, so multi-layered and can be taken so many different ways. Pete is fond of the word "blue" and its homophones and all their many connotations and often plays around with it (see "Tiffany Blews" and "Hum Hallelujah" "I sing the blues and swallow them, too"). That line in BKT is more of Pete's obsession with how many different and contradictory things he can form into one simple line like that. Possibilities:

"The blues" as a reference to the song genre. These are the last time we will venture into the rhythm and blues. I think some people thought this song was actually evidence of a permanent hiatus, that the band would never play again, because these were "the last blues" they were ever going to have.

"The blues" as a reference to the metaphorical state of depression underlying the song genre. This can be Pete's bouts with depression in a more literal sense, or it could be, as you point out, a reference to the hiatus era depressing feelings between them. The use of the plural we implies the latter more than the former.

"The blues" as a reference to pills (as it's also used in "Hum Hallelujah"). Which seems again to circle around to Pete's issues with overmedication and prescription pills and coming free of that.

I have seen in the past, before SMFS came out, argue that BKT as the last song on Mania was, as I said in the first bullet point, a farewell song from the band to all of us, that they were done and walking away. This always struck me as a negative interpretation of the song (and also time has revealed it to be incorrect). Idk, Mania can sometimes inspire in people a bunch of negativity.

I have always thought BKT is an incredibly hopeful song, full of lush romanticism and declarations of devotion. (Mania actually has a bunch of love songs on it, I think.) And yes, as you say, that particular line can definitely be read as a promise, especially since the next lines say that the glow of the cities will lead them back to places they never should have left -- a hiatus-y thought if ever there was one.

Also, I will never, ever, ever get over the line "spiritual revolt from the waist down" from the man who once proclaimed himself to be gay only above the waist. Like, honestly, I cannot believe that lyric exists in the world and is in this song, with these lines.

Not being a fan of Alien, I initially had no idea what the title of this song meant, and thought maybe it was something about chess???? Also, when I Googled it back then, all it gave me as results was the FOB song, and I was so frustrated lol. But then I finally figured it out and now I really love it as a title to this song because I think it really is all about pulling something off something impossible and impressive and needing to trust each other more. Which is another post-hiatus message.

So yes, this is really a song all about coming back from the hiatus, it's settled. ;-)

[asordinaryppl]

A3! Main Story: Part 4 - Act 15: PAINFUL RE:BAKE - Episode 18: The Fate of Ashes

also proofread by myuntachis!

Kabuto: "The ancients confessed before God. Now man is repenting before society." (1)

Kabuto: In other words, the script is done. Sorry.

Banri: It’s so damn light…

Aoshi: Please don’t drag Akutagawa into this.

Kabuto: Perhaps I should say I was entangled in the evil customs of the detestable world of theater… I need more than just time in order to write, there’s not much I could do differently.

Kabuto: Well, it’s well in time for our first performance. We’re going to start practice, so read through it properly.

Banri: Want me to hand out copies?

Kabuto: Yeah.

Actor A: I thought we’d end today with just etude training again…

Actor B: We’re finally starting the real thing, huh.

Banri: (Like he said, I’m the lead, and Hyodo’s the co-lead. Let’s see–)

Banri: ——

Kabuto: The title is “The Fate of Ashes”.

-

16th century London.

After the death of his mentor Jakes, a great playwright and director, the actor Baal takes over his theater company.

Gifted with talent, the directing techniques he had inherited from his mentor, and a large theater company, Baal felt omnipotent.

Just when he thought his time had come, his master’s will wished for him to act out the final play he had written alongside an unknown actor.

The lead would be played by Baal, and the co-lead would be played by an actor who went by the name of Judas. His mentor had discovered him in an orphanage, taken a liking to him and taught him acting.

Without understanding his master’s intentions, Baal welcomed Judas into the theater and they began rehearsals. However, secretly, he despised Judas’s acting, which was barely anything more than amateurish.

In an attempt to embarrass him and make him leave of his own accord, Baal made Judas act alone in the town square, introducing him as the new actor.

But when Judas started acting in front of the audience, it was as if he was a completely different person from the one during rehearsals, and his acting captured the hearts of the people.

When Baal witnessed the acting that had attracted his late master in the first place, he became filled with a jealousy stronger than he’d ever felt before.

As the opening day of the performance approached, Judas’s talents became more and more refined, and Baal started fearing that if they stood on the stage as they were now, he would be seen as the inferior actor.

Growing mad with the fear that he would lose his position and the theater company he inherited from his master, Baal devised a plan to replace the prop knife during the performance’s sword fight with a real one, and kill Judas in a way that would seem accidental.

And on the opening day–

Judas, despite being fully aware the props had been switched, still accepted Baal’s challenge.

Judas was jealous of Baal. He had been cared for by Jakes and stood in the spotlight, not only as an actor, but also as director and owner of the theater company, and wanted to kill and replace him.

The murder attempts disguised as acting escalate into a shameful scuffle on top of the stage, and they wind up killing each other.

The curtain falls, and their corpses are showered with thundering applause.

-

Banri: An one-man show in the town square…

Banri: (... Ain’t this just a rip-off of our Portraits?)

Kabuto: Heh.

Banri: (Now he’s done it.)

Banri: (Baal fixates on Judas’s acting to the point of jealousy and madness… It’s like he’s tellin’ me this coulda been me...)

Banri: (Honestly, it’s irkin’ me that I gotta perform this for him, but… It’s interesting, and seems like a role worth playing.)

Banri: (And this is a play I can’t perform in MANKAI Company– It’s a play that’s got Hyakka Troupe written all over it.)

Banri: (It’ll definitely become a huge source of knowledge down the line.)

Banri: But what’re you gonna do about the artwork and staging necessary for this?

Aoshi: We don’t have the time to create the props necessary to reflect the time period this play is set in.

Kabuto: We won’t be making any props this time.

Kabuto: My plan is to arrange, stack and break soapboxes in order to reflect each scene’s atmosphere.

Aoshi: Soapboxes?

Juza: I’ve seen… somethin’ like that before.

Juza: While the actors stood on stage, stuff like panels and chairs were moved around to represent either a train or a conference room–

Juza: The way the actors themselves created the set while acting was impressive.

Kabuto: That’s exactly “somethin’ like” it.

Kabuto: I plan to have all actors, main cast included, carry soapboxes during each scene change.

Juza: Sounds interesting.

Banri: … Do you even understand how difficult operatin’ through this is gonna be?

Banri: …

Banri: (What does Hyodo even think of this script?)

Banri: (Is he aware that we’re the inspiration for it? Or is he too dumb to get even that much…)

Banri: (Either way, this is a play worth actin’ for both of us. He’ll need to walk over my dead body to beat me on stage.)

Banri: (Uh, I do die in this play, though.)

Banri: ‘lright, let’s get the read-through started–

Kabuto: Wait.

Banri: ?

Kabuto: You and Hyodo will be playing each other’s roles until I tell you to switch.

Banri: Huh?

Juza: I’ll be playing Baal…?

Aoshi: You also had them act as each other during the etudes.

Banri: Ahh, yeah…

Kabuto: That being said, you can start.

Banri: Yes, sir. As you wish, Your Majesty.

-

Kureha: Hmmm… Muffins, or donuts…

Keiku: …

Kureha: Ah! It’s you again! Look, I’m still trying to decide!

Keiku: Doesn’t seem that way to me tho?

Kureha: J-Just wait a second, I’ll pick one right now–

Girl A: What, what?

Girl B: What’s wrong, Kureha-kun?

Keiku: Sup.

Kureha: He snatched the sweets right as I was picking last time, so I’m trying to secure them this time. Ah, but thanks for the puddi–

Girl A: You can eat my desert, then!

Girl A: This seasonal sweet potato roll cake is sooo delicious~! I’ll give it to you!

Kureha: Huh? Th-Thanks…

Keiku: (... Lovable, eh?)

Keiku: What’s that feel like?

Kureha: … Huh?

Keiku: ——tch.

[Keiku walks away]

Kureha: Ah, wait–

-

Keiku: …ugh. I should comm with someone.

previous episode | masterpost | next episode

NOTES:

(1) quote from ryunosuke akutagawa's shuju no kotoba (dwarf's words)

(2) the title of the chapter (and the play) literally translates to 'divine providence of the scorched earth'... kabuto when i get you

[zahri-melitor]

Recent Reads:

Batman Universe: this was charming. Look, on one hand this is so very clearly written for what it was written for (short original stories in a compilation magazine bouncing Bruce off a whole bunch of different parts of the DCU as an introduction), so the plot functions in 12 page increments. On the other hand it is hilarious and I love the level of silly. There is a lot of banter, including banter between characters who you wouldn’t necessarily expect to engage in banter together. There are so many team ups.

I don't think the narrative voice of the characters involved is particularly strong (they all default to quite quippy, and a lot of the characters are somewhat one-note in their characterisation), but I've seen worse and it's genuinely just an entertaining little story.

Batman: The Detective: oh, I liked this. Well, I think it would have been stronger with a different artist (Bruce in this is built like a brick shit house with a face to match), but in terms of story, I was hugely weak to it given it contains not only Henri Ducard, but also Beryl Hutchinson and a new Squire in Amina Eluko. I personally think Knight and Squire are strongest when they are not intermixed with all of the rest of Batman Inc characters, so that made it a lot of fun.

Some of the coincidences in it were hugely pat (Amina's mum, anyone?), but the story made sense and I thought it tackled the Joker problem in an interesting way (in that I'm tired of the Joker Problem but at least this played out the steps of the argument being made on page).

Fairly tight plot. Not a lot of bloat. A couple of last minute very convenient saves to move the plot along, but this is Batman: that happens. Good work from Tom Taylor, honestly.

Man-Bat 2021: what you thought I wouldn’t comment on a Man-Bat series? Me?? So this is explicitly a prequel to the Rebirth Justice League Dark title, and so set in 2017, despite coming out in 2021.

It’s not my favourite Kirk characterisation I’ve ever seen and I could have done without Francine spending the entire title being on the edge of divorcing Kirk, but I thought it did some interesting things with storytelling in the mythos. Certainly a more penitent Kirk here than say his recent appearances in Batman & Robin.

One day Becky and Aaron will return to me.

[aquietwritingcorner]

Healing Moments

Title: Healing Moments Fandom:  TMNT 2003 Word Count: 3960  Author: aquietwritingcorner/realitybreakgirl Rating: K  Characters:  Raphael, Donatello, Leonardo, Michelangelo, Splinter, April O’Neil, Casey Jones Warning: NA Summary: Raph escaped Shredder’s ship with broken ribs. But broken ribs still have consequences.      Notes: This was written for someone a bit back. I never published it outside of showing it to that individual, which was a shame. So I’m publishing it now! I hope you all enjoy it!   ff.net || AO3

______________________________________

Healing Moments

Don sat next to Raph, wetting down a cloth and using his left hand to wring it out and lay it on Raph’s forehead. His brother turned his head slightly and murmured, but otherwise didn’t react to the cloth. Don frowned but didn’t leave his brother’s side. The rest of his family was sleeping, at least as much as any of them could with their injuries from Shredder’s Ship. It wasn’t unusual for any of them to be awake at odd hours because they just couldn’t get comfortable.

They should have been paying more attention to Raph being uncomfortable.

It had started with a cough. They hadn’t paid it much mind. As much as April and Casey cleaned, this farmhouse was old, and they were all sleeping in the attic. It wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility that there was something up here or even just outside that Raph was mildly allergic to. Mike had even teased him a little bit about it.

But then the cough had gotten worse, and Raph had begun sleeping more. He had just brushed it off as healing, which also made sense. It took a lot of energy to heal, something that they, unfortunately, knew well. It was only when he had looked feverish, his eyes a bit glassy, his head a bit warm, that it had hit them that something else was going on. With April and Casey’s help—as they were the only ones uninjured and able to help the most effectively—Don gave Raph a look over.

Don didn’t have access to medical care. Here, at the farm, he didn’t even have access to his lab. He would have liked to confirm the illness that he was positive Raph had, but instead he had to make do with his observation and the very small lab he had set up in the barn. Still, he was certain that he knew what Raph had.

Pneumonia.

It made sense. Raph’s main injuries had been his ribs, which, of course, were near his lungs. With the pain of his broken ribs, Raph likely wasn’t breathing as deeply as he should have been. That would have set him up for an infection to settle in his lower lungs and turn into pneumonia. That was only confirmed by the way that Raph’s lungs sounded. That crackling was pretty distinctive, even in mutant turtles.

Don had immediately started on what treatments they could do at the farm. Making sure that Raph was sitting up instead of laying down, giving him over the counter pain killers, making sure he stayed hydrated, and having him sit in a steamy bathroom. Splinter had brought some of his teas with him, as well, and he made sure that Raph drank plenty of those. But it wasn’t enough. Raph continued to get worse, and Don had sent out April and Casey to see if they could get their hands on any antibiotics. He hadn’t questioned how they had managed to get what they did, he had just taken it.

Now they just had to hope that they were going to work on Raph and that he wouldn’t need something stronger.

“How is he?”

Don looked up at Leo’s voice, not terribly surprised to hear it. Leo hadn’t been sleeping much lately, and Don honestly wasn’t sure if it was emotional, or because of his injured shell. It was likely both.

Don looked back down at Raph. “He’s resting, at least. The fever is still up, though. I did manage to get him to drink some the last time he was awake.”

Leo nodded, standing over their brother. “That’s good at least. The medicine will help the fever, right?”

Don frowned. “The NSAID will help the fever. The antibiotics will help the infection, as long as it’s a bacterial infection.”

Leo paused. “What do you mean, ‘as long as it’s a bacterial infection’?”

Don looked back down at Raph, laying a hand on the back of his neck as a way to check his temperature. “Pneumonia in humans is most likely to be caused by a bacterial or viral infection. In turtles it can also be fungal. I highly doubt that it’s fungal, but it could be viral. If it is, the antibiotics won’t do him any good. We’ll have to rely on treating the symptoms and hope that his body can handle the rest. If it’s bacterial, then the anti-biotics will help.”

Leo was quiet for a moment. “How can you tell which kind it is?”

“Here?” Don said “I can’t. I’m making the best guess that I can. We’re just going to have to hope we’re lucky.”

Leo’s frowned deepened and he turned away. “Luck is not something I think we can rely on.”

Don sighed. “Well, it’s all we’ve got right now, Leo,” he replied, perhaps a little bit snippier than he needed to be. “So, we’ll have to make do.”

He turned his attention back to Raph as the other turtled started to cough. Don helped him sit up a bit more, and supported him as he coughed, none of his breaths as deep as Don had hoped they would be, but better than nothing. It sounded so very painful each time he did this, but coughing out the infection was a good thing, even if he knew it set Raph’s broken ribs aflame with pain.

With a sigh, Don helped to lean Raph back in his bed, making sure he was propped securely on the pillows and that he was as comfortable as he could be. Raph’s eyes cracked open, and he looked over at Don.

“Donnie?” he croaked out, his voice sounding rough and weak.

“Yeah, Raphie, it’s me,” Don said with a smile. “How are you feeling?”

“Awful.”

Don chuckled slightly. “Yeah, I’d imagine so. I’m guessing your ribs are pretty sore?”

“Yeah.”

“Do your lungs feel sore as well?” Don asked.

Raph paused a moment more before answering that one. “Yeah,” he said.

Don nodded. “I thought so. You just rest, alright? I’ll take care of things right now. We all will.”

Raph let out a bit of a grunt, winced, and then closed his eyes. It wasn’t long before he drifted off to sleep again. Don sighed, and moved the washcloth back to Raph’s head, keeping watch over his brother.

Leo watched the whole thing, not interfering with Don’s care, and then let out what sounded like an irritated sigh and walked away, going towards the window.

Don watched, and then turned back to Raphael, keeping his own sigh to himself, and replacing the cloth on Raph’s head.

~*~

Mikey wasn’t terrible surprised when he looked over and found Donnie asleep at Raph’s side. Mikey had come over to relieve Don, to give him a break from the constant watch he had been keeping on Raph. After all, even though Don was usually in charge of their care when they were sick, at this point Raph’s care really wasn’t anything that the rest of them couldn’t do. Helping Raph sit up to cough, trying to get him to drink water, putting cold cloths on his forehead to keep his fever down, those were all things that anyone could do. Don was just stubborn and didn’t want to leave Raph’s side.

So, Mike had come anyway, told Don that Master Splinter had sent him up to give Don a break, and not objected when Don wanted to stay nearby a little longer. He hadn’t been surprised when, within moments, Don had fallen asleep. Mike had draped a blanket over his purple-banded brother, made sure he wasn’t putting pressure on his arm, and then turned all of his attention to Raph.

His brother did not look good. Raph was always all strength and attitude, even when he was being soft and caring. Right now, he didn’t look like either of those things. He was propped up on a mound of pillows, cradling his shell to keep him almost upright. His mouth was open as he breathed, although his breaths were a bit gaspy. He was pale and didn’t look like he’d be able to hold up his head much less fight anything off.

Mikey didn’t like it.

“Heya, Raph, just me, come to check on you. Well, that and to give Donnie a break. You know how he gets when one of us is sick. He’s a worse mother hen than Leo!”

Leo… that was another brother to be worried about, although for a completely different reason. But Mike would come back to that later.

“He’s been with you most of the time, but, I mean, part of it makes sense. He does know the most, and he’s honestly the most mobile of us. Well, Leo might be too, but I think his shell hurts him more than he lets on, and Don fusses over it, too.”

Mikey was working as he was talking, taking the moment to check Raph’s temperature and make sure that the cloth on his head was nice and cool.

“Anyway, since I can’t do much more than sit on my butt and stare at the wall, I figured I might as well sit on my butt here, give Donnie a break, and grace you with my presence!”

Raph stirred under Mikey’s touch, and Mike leaned in as much as his broken legs would allow. “Raph?”

Raph’s eyes cracked open, and he blearily blinked at his brother. “Mike?” he mumbled, his voice weak. “S’you?”

Mike grinned at his brother. “Yep! The one and only! I decided to give Donnie a little break!”

Raph grunted a little, and his eyes traveled around until they landed on Don, who was asleep, hunched over the end of Raph’s bed. “Good.”

Raph started coughing again, shallow ones that sounded like they needed to be deeper. His face contorted in pain and his arms wrapped around his middle. Mikey reached over as best he could, supporting him. It was hard to see Raph in pain like this, and not be able to do anything about it. He rubbed Raph’s shell, trying to find a way to soothe him at least a little.

Coughing, he knew, was good with something like pneumonia. It brought up the junk in the lungs, and Mikey knew to use a little bowl to catch anything that Raph coughed up. As gross as it was, Donnie would want to examine it. But it also was hard to watch him be in pain from coughing with broken ribs.

As the coughing eased up, Mikey helped Raph lean back again, watching as his brother gasped for breath, pain still clear across his face. He picked up a glass of water with a straw and held it up to Raph. “Here, Raphie. Think you can drink some of this? You need to get some water in you.”

Raph gave a tired nod, still working on catching his breath back. But as soon as he could, he clamped his lips around the straw, drinking it slowly. Mikey held it up as long as Raph would drink it, and then sat it to the side. “Think you can swallow some pills? Don left a schedule for your medicine.”

Raph nodded, and Mikey fumbled around for the pills, doing the best to reach for the pills without hurting himself, too. He read the instructions, and then took out the correct dosages, helping Raph to take them and drink a bit more water.

“You think you can finish up this glass of water? It’d be good for you if you could.”

“Yeah…” The word was faint and tired, but it was there.

Mike held the glass up again, never once letting it drop and adjusting it so that Raph could get every last bit out if out.

“That’s good, Raph. I’ll see if we can get you a refill, okay? In the meantime, just lay back. I’ll get that cloth back on your head.”

“…thanks, Mikey.”

“No problem, bro,” Mike said with a smile. “Hey—why don’t I catch you up on what’s been going on!”

As Mike prattled on, talking for as long as he knew Raph was listening, and hoping that it brought him some comfort.

~*~

April looked over when she heard a small groan. She had been changing the water out, making sure that all of it was fresh after having sent all of the others either to rest or to go outside. They had all been taking turns looking after Raph and they all needed a break. She could take care of Raph for a while and let them have that break. They deserved it.

“Hey there, big guy,” she said when she noticed that Raph’s eyes were open. “About time you woke up. It’s nearly noon.”

Raph blinked around the room blearily. “…where’s…?”

“I sent them all out for some sunshine,” she said, finishing up with the water. “I’d send you out for it, too, but I don’t think you’re quite up for it yet.”

Raph leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “…sounds nice.”

April smiled at him. “Don’t worry, you’ll be out there soon enough.”

Raph merely let out a grunt and said nothing more. April went on about straightening up the attic—Despite the presence of Master Splinter, there were four teenaged boys living there—at least until she heard Raph start to cough. She turned around and frowned when she saw him starting to cough again, pain clear on his face. She immediately rushed to his side, putting an arm around him and taking some of his weight on herself.

The coughs were a little deeper than she had heard him have before, which was good, but the pain on his face wasn’t nearly as good and it tore at her heart. The guys were like little brothers to her, and she hated to see them all in this much pain. Still, she held him against her as he coughed and hacked, rubbing her hand on the rim of his shell, holding a cloth up to his face, and speaking soft, encouraging words to him.

When he finished, he was breathless, but he didn’t seem quite as breathless as she’d seen him before. Still, she helped to lay him back carefully, letting him catch his breath, and went to fetch him a glass of water.

“Here you go, Raph. Drink as much of it as you can, alright?” she said, carefully adjusting the glass at need. “Just take it at your own pace.”  

April held the glass until Raph had finished it off, filling it up again and offering him more. Raph drank a little more until he finally stopped and laid his head back in the pillows that were piled up around him.

“…Thanks, Ape…” he said, his voice scratchy.

“It’s not a problem,” she said. April settled in beside him, taking care not to put stress on his lungs or ribs, and brought him to her, letting her little brother lean on her and relax. She gave the top of his head a peck. “What are big sisters for?”

~*~

“I think this commentator’s whack,” Casey said. “There ain’t no way they’re gonna win. They ain’t got the stats.”

Raph glanced over at Casey, from where both of them were watching the TV that he had managed to bring up the stairs and hook up enough to get the game. Raph still wasn’t up for much, but he had managed to stay awake through a couple of innings at least, which was more than last time.

Casey looked at him. “Don’t look at me like that, bro. They just pulled up three guys from the minor league after they traded off their top players. There ain’t no way they’re gonna do well after that.”

“…was stupid,” Raph agreed. “…but they got that guy… from Puerto Rico…”

“Yeah, he is really good,” Casey admitted. “But ya can’t rely on one guy to bring up the whole team! Besides, the other team managed to get four of the best players in the league!”

“…no others.”

“Yeah? Well, ya know what? Those three should be able to pull the team through!”

“YOU said—”

Raph’s rebuttal was cut off by a round of harsh coughing, which immediately brought the argument to an end. Casey abandoned his argumentative stance, instead moving to support Raph through the coughing, bringing up the small kidney bowl for him to spit anything out into. He kept a strong arm around Raph, making sure that he didn’t bend too far in his coughing, aggravating his ribs more.

As soon as Raph was finished, Casey helped him recline back on his mountain of pillows and sat the kidney bowl down.

“Hang on, Raph, lemme get ya some water.” Casey turned back to the water they were still keeping nearby and poured Raph some fresh into a cup. He helped Raph hold it, only letting go when it felt like Raph had a good hold on it, although he kept his hands hovering nearby. “Don’t drink it too fast, Raph. Ya don’t wanna throw up with broken ribs. Trust me on that one.”

Raph shot Casey a look, but he kept drinking the water anyway, draining it until the glass was empty. Casey poured him another one, and Raph started in on it too. Finally, he finished, and he let Casey take the glass, his arms dropping tiredly.

“…goofball.”

“Who me?” Casey said. “I ain’t the one that just tried to yell with pneumonia. Even I ain’t that stupid.”

Casey settled back down next to Raph and said nothing about the breadcrumb that Raph flicked at him, just flicking it back again. Raph flicked it back, and the two settled into a silent war as they watched the game.­­­­

~*~

“How are you feeling today, my son?”

Raph looked over at his father as Splinter carried a tray of tea towards him. “Better, Master Splinter,” he said, although his voice was still scratchy and weak.

“I am glad to hear it,” Splinter said with a smile. “I’ve brought you some food and tea, my son. Do you feel like eating?”

“I can try.”

“I would like that.”

Splinter sat the tray down and sat out the lap tray they had been using for Raphael’s meals. Taking his time, he sat some of the food on Raphael’s tray. Raph eyed the food that was left over. It was a lot of food, and Raph wasn’t sure he could eat all of that.

Splinter sat himself down next to Raphael’s bed. “I hope you do not mind if I take lunch with you, my son. Your brothers are otherwise occupied, and I believe that Mr. Jones and Ms. O’Neil would appreciate some time together.”

Raph smiled. So that’s why there was so much food on the tray. “Yer fine, Sensei.”

For a little bit, the two ate in relative silence, until Raph felt the urge to start coughing again. He tried to finish his bite and swallow before the urge hit, but he didn’t quite make it, some of the food coming out as he coughed.

Immediately, Splinter was at his side, a hand on his shell. “Keep coughing, Raphael, it is okay. Just keep coughing it up.”

Raph didn’t really have much of choice, but when he was finished, he sagged back on the pillows again, trying to catch his breath.

“S-sorry,” he started to apologize, mostly for the mess of food particles he had coughed out.

Splinter immediately dismissed it. “Do not apologize, my son. Believe me, this is far from the worst mess you and your brothers have left on me.” There was a trace of humor in his voice, even as he made sure that Raphael was settled and brushed the food away.

He reached for the tea, and held it to his son, helping Raphael to drink it. “Finish it all,” Splinter said. “And then, when you feel like it, finish what you can eat. I will be here with you.”

Raph couldn’t help the smile that touched his lips. Somehow, even at this age, knowing that his father was there was comforting.

~*~

Raph woke up, not sure what had woken him up until he looked over and saw the silhouette of Leo sitting beside him. Everyone else was asleep, and only the moonlight illuminated the attic room.

“…Leo?”

Leo shifted. “Did I wake you?” he asked.

Raph shook his head. “Dunno.”

Leo hummed.

For a moment, the two sat in silence, until Raph felt the urge to cough building again. He hated coughing at night, because it disturbed his whole family. Still, it couldn’t be denied, and it wasn’t long before Raph was coughing, holding his ribs as he did.

He felt Leo’s arm come around his shoulder, his other bracing Raph from the front, not letting him curl over on himself. Finally, the coughing fit finished, and Leo leaned Raph back.

“Here,” he said, bringing a glass up. “Drink some water.”

Raph took the glass, drinking the water slowly. Leo watched him closely, taking the glass when he was finished, and then sitting back at Raphael’s side. For a moment, neither of them said anything.

“…Do your ribs still hurt?”

“…yeah. But not as bad.”

More silence. Then…

“I’m sorry, Raphael.”

“Don’t be.”

They didn’t say anything else, but Leo sat by Raph’s side for the rest of the night, helping him anytime he needed it.

~*~

“Hey! Look who’s finally downstairs!” Casey said with a grin.

“Yeah, yeah,” Raph said, grinning, even if he was being supported by both Leo and Don on both sides.

“With his fever broken for a few days, and his ribs seeming to heal, it seemed a good time to bring him downstairs,” Don said.

“It’s good to see you down here,” April said with a smile.

Leo and Mikey helped Raph to the couch, where they carefully lowered him down.

“If you feel tired or if you need anything, make sure you tell us,” Don said, hovering over Raph.

“I will, Don, ya don’t have to hover,” Raph said.

“Dude, Don not hovering is like asking Master Splinter not to give us tea,” Mikey said.

“Which is exactly what I am bringing you now,” Splinter said. “And you will drink it.”

“I’m glad you’re feeling better, Raphael.” Leonardo said, giving his shoulder a squeeze before moving away.

“Thanks, bro,” Raph said, settling in on the couch and taking the tea that Master Splinter offered him. He let out a shallow sigh of contentment, glad to be out of the attic and among his family again.

“Hey—who wants to watch a movie?” Mikey asked.

“I’ll make the popcorn!” Don volunteered.

“I’ll come help you,” April said.

“What movie did you have mind?” Casey asked, leaning over to look at the collection they had brought with them.

Raph watched as Splinter settled down in a chair, and Leo moved closer to the family as they all gathered around. His ribs still hurt, he still had a cough, and he couldn’t breathe deeply, but he was glad to be here with his family. Maybe none of them were whole and healthy, but they were well on their way to healing at least—and with the way his family gathered around him, he could tell that they felt the same way.

Raph settled back, drank his tea, and listened to his family argue the finer points of the best Star Trek movie.

“Ya better just hope that Five ain’t the only one that still plays.”

He couldn’t help but grin at the cacophony of protests that rose at his words. Yeah. They’d all be fine in time.

[holdingonforheaven]

🍓🍎🍒🍇

I got greedy 😁 Fruit salad please?

One fruit salad coming right up!!! 🥰🥰🥰

�� What’s a fic you’ve written you feel is underrated? 

Honestly, Blinded, which I wrote for the Febuwhump semiconscious prompt. Maybe I didn't give it a good title (I have a hard time titling my works) or a flashy enough summary, but I think it's some of my best writing.

🍎 Is there anything you straight-up won’t write?

Any kind of incest, and I'm including clone shipping in that. I get that other people like it, but it's not for me!

🍒 What’s your favorite character dynamic to write? (Can be romantic or platonic, specific or general!) 

Oooh, this is a tough one! There are so many good pairings. I love writing CodyWan; they basically wrote all of Breathless themselves, and that was supposed to be a whump prompt not a first kiss, lol. I also love clones being siblings--I have four brothers, so I like playing with the different kinds of relationships siblings have with each other. I feel like you see a lot of that (and there's more coming) in Not Alone and Fallout. The Bad Batch fall into this category, too. Crosshair & Omega especially have me in a chokehold. They just have so much potential for sarcasm and sweetness and angst 🥺

🍇 Is there a particular scene/episode/book/etc that you want to just write a million fics about, over and over? Which one? 

Hmmmmm. If I had a stronger psyche, I'd really sink my teeth into the Umbara arc. As it is, I can't even rewatch it, but there's soooooo much you could do with it, from just straight-up fix-it fics where nothing bad happens at all, to highly-focused whump fics where we explore it in depth from just one character's perspective. I really wish we got to see Anakin's reaction to the aftermath of that arc...like, he left his troopers in the hands of a dark jedi who abused them to hell and back, and you're telling me Mr. "I Killed The Women And Children, Too" didn't have anything to say about that?? I just feel like he'd have so much grief and betrayal and guilt that he'd need to process and he wouldn't do it very well because he's Anakin.

This was so fun!! Thank you for asking 🥰

[haejaetae-recs]

Favorites

(All fics tagged here!)

Here I've compiled some of my favorite works by some of my favorite writers. I'll add a lot more detail to this masterlist including brief descriptions and my input as found in my reblogs.

Also, if you happen to enjoy their work as well, please support them however you can!

← Back

༺♡༻

Quarantine Chronicles by @domjaehyun | Jaehyun, Johnny, Jungwoo, Jaemin, Mark, Jeno, Haechan | 3 pts. 126.7k total | M | roommates au, fwb, uni au

Fourteen days, five roommates, and five remarkably high sex drives. what could go wrong?

I'm obviously a Jaehyun simp but while reading this, I found myself so immersed in the other characters as well (especially Jaemin OOF he's such a freak 😭). Part 1 is basically 20k word long filth smut LOL so like I always say, be warned!

Pussy Fiend by @domjaehyun | Haechan | 2 pt. 68.9k total | M | roommates au, fwb, f2l, some dubcon be warned, uni au

The title truly does explain it all lol. Another @domjaehyun hit. The dynamics not only between HC and MC but all the roommates *muah*. The tension: outstanding. The smut??? *cries*. Yeah, this fic deserves the hype. Part 2 is a must-read.

Bitch Hunters by @tyonfs | Dream '00 line | 4 part series | M

huang renjun, lee jeno, lee donghyuck, and na jaemin are determined to have girlfriends by the end of their college years, but that’s easier said than done when they’re known as the biggest players on campus.

besties (gone sexual) by @tyonfs | Jaemin | 43.4k | M | best friends, fwb2l, slowburn

The final (and longest) installation of the bitch hunters series. Each part is a different dream 00 line member and can be read separately, although they are all a part of the same au. I do recommend reading the prologue found in the series masterlist first!

Na Jaemin, resident playboy and serial heartbreaker on campus, thinks he might have a crush on you [, his] best friend of seven years...

I could say so much about this fic series. I'm lowkey attached to every Tyonfs character I've ever read about. I loved every part, but Jaemin's hit especially hard, probably because of the length (that's what she said). It's not only the amazing story between Jaemin and his girl, but also expands the au so much and brings it to life. The ending made me feel like I was watching the finale of the last season of a TV show. So so good. Like I said, the parts can be read separately, but they're stronger when read in order. <3

Use Me by @yutaholic | Taeyong | 19k | M | bbf

You've had a crush on Taeyong, your brother’s best friend, for as long as you can remember, a crush made worse by the fact he’s completely off-limits. When Taeyong suddenly confesses you haven’t been alone in your feelings, you start sneaking around to be together, risking it all not to get caught.

One of my favorite Taeyong fics of all time *chef's kiss*. I love that the story is so heavy on the mc's life and development without taking too much away from the romance.

no one wishes at the snow by @neoculturetravesty | Jaehyun | 18k | M | fake marriage, single parent

Marrying for love was for the fortunate few. Marrying for love happened in fairytales and movies and dramas. Not real life. In real life, everyone married for convenience.

<Husband Jaehyun3 <3 So unique and well-written! If you're looking for a really good fic to take you on an emotional ride, this is the one!

cat & mouse by @tyonfs | Jaemin | 17.7k | M | uni au, fwb, brother's best friend, athlete/sports

rule number one of bro code states that sisters are completely off-limits, and, y/n, we just pushed that limit.

This fic is perfection, honestly. Idk why I didn't add it to this list sooner, seeing as the series was one of the first things I rb'd on this blog.

this is (not) easy. by @mrkis | Mark | 13.2k | M | uni au, fwb, bffs2l

Getting into a friends with benefits situation with your all time best friend was so (not) easy...

This is why I love the fwb trope so much. Angsty but not too angsty, and the smut scene where he makes love to y/n before trying to end things/confess. UGH. Big D Mark 4ever <3

Freaks by @2jaeh | Jaehyun | 8k | M | uni au, social difference, cheating

The campus bad girl has her eyes set on the preppy good boy, and she always gets what she wants...

Freaks: The Prequel by @2jaeh | Ten, Taeyong | 11.8k | M | uni au, fwb, revenge, 3some, mxm

A story of why the entire campus were almost certain that you Taeyong and Ten were in a poly affair. 

I adore the dynamic between TaeTenY/n, and I enjoyed reading Jae's internal struggle not only with his feelings toward mc but also with himself!!! Tbh, I get second lead syndrome from TY even though he's not meant to be a second lead, so I find myself gravitating towards the prequel, haha. 3 biases, one au. Really does it for me.

Playing the Game by @sluttyten | Taeyong | 11.7k | M | uni au, fwb, f2l, just a tiny bit angsty

Taeyong’s been your best friend for a few years now, but sometimes it gets a little hard to just be his friend. you’re at university and there’s no better time to blur that line between friends and a little bit more, to make your lives just that much more messy. 

Friends helping friends ahahah... I love his character in this a little too much and reread this fic when I'm having Taeyong brainrot. Perpetually in my TY era.

Pretty Boy by @ncteez | Mark | 9.3k | M | social differences

[Upon] realizing your grades have dropped drastically due to [your] lifestyle, you have no choice but to approach Mark for help. 

Hot nerd trope gets me weak in the knees every time LOL especially when the smut is this good *chef's kiss*

Mine too by @waithyuck | Haechan, Jaehyun | 7.5k | M | poly, mxm, 3some

Despite being in a consensual poly relationship with you and Jaehyun, Haechan is reluctant to touch you. You start to think he doesn't care for you until something switches in him after one steamy night...

My ults in a poly fic l- this was meant for me to find. Read this one multiple times and I think about it a lot because it exposed me to poly mxm and literally changed me LOL. Also, I loveeee how there's this sense of tenderness and fondness underneath the pure lust and desire between hc and mc.

In Your Arms by @sluttyten | Jaehyun, Mark | 6.5k | M | uni au/frat, fwb, are we seeing a trend with me and fwb fics???, 3some, a lil mxm, Halloween

(Part of the author's kinktober) Mark finds out you've been secretly hooking up with his and your other best friend, Jaehyun; Mark has a secret(s) of his own.

“Are you two not fucking? I thought this was an all three of us kind of thing?” THAT LINE ALMOST TOOK ME OUT I SWEAR LMAO. I keep coming back to this one ngl. The dynamics are just so unique and well done and I'm a sucker for service top Markie hehe <3

Still wondering how long those two had been at it tho... 🤔

late night driving by @jjsneo | Chenle | 5.6k | M | roommates

Chenle swears he’s going going crazy with cabin fever inside your shared house — and there’s no way you’re saying no to a late night drive with the roommate you so desperately have a crush on. who cares if his original story was a lie and, secretly, he just wanted to be alone with you.

DAMN. Chenle smut is so scarce around here, but THIS alone makes up for that, lol. I love how sweet it started out. The smut part lowkey caught me by surprise. Once again DAMN. Please read this.

amortentia (the room smells like absolute shit) by @tonicandjins | Haechan | 2.8k | hogwarts au, e2l-ish, cute stuff ♪(´ε｀*)

It’s no secret that the ongoing cat-and-mouse game between you and Slytherin House’s very own Lee Donghyuck remains unceasing from the day you and him were sorted five years ago to this day...

At the time of me reading this, I'm playing Hogwarts Legacy and am OBSESSED. On top of that, I'm a Ravenclaw, and this whole blog's aesthetic is inspired by HP (hence the dark academia). Anyway, this was really cute, and I love school crush tropes, especially when it's paired with enemies to lovers, I just- *sigh* Having knowledge of the series definitely makes this more enjoyable, as I was imagining everything happening and the surroundings.

[mochidreambubble]

What’s a lil smooch between comrades

written for OC x Canon Week (organised by @theocxcanonweek )

Ao3 link here

Day 2 Prompt:

Dancing / Fantasy AU / “Just one little kiss…”

Fic is what is says on the title/tin, and a much more light hearted fluff piece written for fun.

Gilbert Mclane / OC fic for God Eater 2, Post GE2 Rage Burst Ending 

Using an OC Blood Captain: Haruka ‘Ruka’ Shinonome

Will mainly be using the codename Ruka over the fullname 

Written in the span of 30 minutes, thus the length. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was said without an afterthought, almost carelessly. She was tired; heck everyone else in the team likely was after an arduous chain mission dealing with dozens of Aragami. So when Gil asked if Ruka wanted anything, without any afterthought she replied, “Maybe just one little kiss from you.”

The other Blood Unit members in the carrier go silent, staring at their Blood Captain. Ruka doesn’t even seem to have registered her own words, looking back at the bewildered faces staring at her. 

“What? Why are you all looking at me like that?”

There’s a slight blush on Gil’s cheeks, pulling his hat lower to obscure most of his face from her. Romeo looks between both of them before standing abruptly, pointing at the both of them. “AHA! I knew there was something up between the two of you- AUGH!”

Livie elbows his side, causing Romeo to slump back down into his seat. Ciel, every calm - though even in this situation a little flustered - clears her throat and speaks up. “Um, Captain, did you perhaps not realise what you just said?”

Ruka cocks her head to one side. “No? What did I just say?”

“It’s fine!” Gil catches everyone’s attention, suddenly shouting. “Let’s just… Take a breather and rest, okay guys?”

There’s a murmur of agreement, everyone settling down to wait to return to the Far East Branch. Though clearly the reactionary effect remained as the first thing Julius asks upon seeing his beloved family return is to question if everyone was alright. Even Nana speaks up.

“You got a fever or something, Gil?” She jumps to snatch his hat away, to press a hand against his forehead on her tippy toes. Gil gently swats her hands aside.

“No, I’m fine,” He takes his hat back, stalking off to the lounge.

“Geez, what’s his big deal,” Nana pouts.

Ciel gently pats her on the shoulder, Julius on the other. “There was nothing wrong with anyone according to the scanners on everyone's status, so I’m sure he’s fine, Nana,” Julis smiles warmly, trying to dissuade her worries. But there was undoubtedly concern in his eyes as well.

Romeo just laughs. “Can’t believe Mr I’m So Tough is so flustered just cause the Captain said she wanted a kiss from him for a job well done.”

Ruka, who was working on the nearby terminal, halts and turns to Romeo’s direction in a shock. “I SAID WHAT NOW?!”

~-~-~

“You should have just went for it,” Haru snickers into his drink while Gil grumbles into his. “I mean, your cute little captain said she wanted one from you right?”

“That’s not-!” Gil slams his drink down on the counter, causing Mutsumi to shout Hey! From Cappy’s cage, a rude interruption in her short break playing with the adorably huge capybara. She turns back to the den’s cute pet when Gil mouths an apology and glowers back at his sort of older brother figure slash friend. “It’s not like that between us, alright? She’s… She’s just-”

“The person who you call partner, the shoulder you lean on for support, the one you feel like protecting, and totally regret not saying yes to kiss-”

“Why am I even talking to you about this?” Gil sighs, defeated and downs his drink.

“Because I’m the expert. Obviously.”

“Whatever you say, Haru.”

Honestly though, being able to just relax and chat with Haruomi again, how could Gil not be grateful to have met the Captain, be part of blood, finally getting to work through his low points and come out stronger? Her presence and companionship was something he finds himself treasuring and…

“Uh, sorry,” Although her voice is timid, a large break from her confident bravado and self assurance, it comes down like a crashing storm. He turns to see Ruka, fingers interlocked and eyes cast to the ground. “If I’m interrupting I mean. It’s uh, just that I was wondering if I could talk with Gil for a minute.”

“Sure, sure,” there’s a certain smugness, a This is your shot mental message from Haru as he winks at Gil, whose pretty sure he feels the need to smack said friend right about now. “Ol’ haru’s all tuckered out anyways, and I got a hot date tomorrow so I better go get some shut eye. You kids don’t have too much fun, you hear?”

And that just leaves the two of them.

He invites Ruka to take Haru’s seat, trying not to be flustered about this. After all, she’s had a drink with him several times before by this point, even on nights where it was just the two of them, chatting the time away. 

She nods, careful not to meet his eyes. She speaks up though, after a few moments of silence. “Sorry. For saying that so carelessly earlier. You must, uh, be weirded out by that I guess?”

“Wh- No!” He interjects quickly, Ruka looking up to meet his eyes. “I mean. It just… Caught me off guard.”

“Oh. Uh. Okay…” She looks back to her hands, as if processing his few words. 

She doesn’t speak up again for several minutes, so Gil takes the chance to keep talking. “I mean, uh… I just never thought about stuff like this, not since I transferred out of the Glasgow branch, and all the stuff that went down lately.”

He takes a sip, unsure how to fill up the silence. Ruka finally says something, her voice softer than he’s used to. “If I asked you again…”

Gilbert Mclane isn’t sure what came over him. Maybe it’s that the lounge was now empty since Mutsumi took Cappy on a walk, and that Ruka was just close to him right this moment…

He turns to her and it was as if, despite her apparent shyness, she was hopeful and waiting. He hopes he answers her unspoken question with his eyes, and instead of him, she takes the initiative instead. 

Gil would be lying if he said he didn’t regret it, Haru smacking him on the head in his mind, as with her in the lead, he finds her soft lips on his cheek instead. He finds his face in flames though, so perhaps it was best they were taking things slow…

“On the cheek?! That’s weak sauce, c’mon you two!”

And the moment was broken with Romeo’s loud voice from the entrance of the lounge, the rest of the Blood Unit and Haru tumbling in. 

“Romeo you idiot!”

“I’m so sorry Captain, I tried to stop them-”

“Yeesh Gil, I knew you were green but-”

There’s a horrified flustered shriek from the Blood Captain and Romeo and the rest of Blood find themselves running for their life with the Captain on their heels. Haruomi, sauntering over, unscathed from her wrath somehow, waves his hand in front of Gil’s face.

“Hoo boy, guess you’ve still got lots to learn from ol’ Haru.”

(fin)

not beta read so if you spot any mistakes, do let me know!

Two random things about Ruka:

Her last name 'Shinonome' is very intentional to have a connection to someone else in the whole GE/CV games universe

Initially used a short blade but switched to a spear... to match ;3 (the kurogane to his shirogane)

[linskywords]

Taylor Swift Meets Hockey RPF: Advent Calendar Day 1

And our first song is...

Song: Speak Now Album: Speak Now Year: 2010 Lyrics: https://genius.com/Taylor-swift-speak-now-lyrics Rank: 25/25

Ahaha this song. I could not resist including it because WHAT a fic premise. Main character shows up at their teammate’s wedding and tells him not to marry this girl because the two of them should be together, and teammate actually goes for it!! It’s perfect (except for a lot of emphasis on the singer being a girl). Honestly it’s even better than the song premise as written, because why is this guy marrying a girl he doesn’t like if she isn’t a beard? Not sure you really want to be with a guy like that.

This song lost a few points for the singer being incredibly scornful of the bride-to-be, which would be a pretty unusual choice for a hockey RPF protagonist. Slash fic sidelines women enough as it is; we don’t usually like our main characters to be mean to them on top of that. Still, though, solid gold premise, well done on the ficciness.

Pairing I’d assign to this song: I have to go with Taylor Hall and Jordan Eberle for this, mostly because of the deeply wonderful fic where Jordan realizes years later that Taylor actually confessed his love for him in his best man speech. I’m thinking Taylor and Jordan aren’t together and have never been together; they’ve been a sizzling pool of sexual tension and repression and denial as Jordan hides in the safety of a girlfriend (no shade intended to rl partners here, you seem lovely) and Taylor lives in the tortured hope that Jordan will eventually come around and realize that what he feels for Taylor is so much realer and stronger than what he feels for this girl. But then instead of breaking up, Jordan and this girl go and get engaged, wtf, and it seems like Jordan’s actually going to go through with it even though Taylor knows it’s a terrible mistake that’s just going to lead to him being closeted and miserable. Maybe they even have some kind of fraught conversation at 3 am the night before the wedding that ends with a heartrending kiss that’s everything Taylor always knew it would be, and then Taylor knows that Jordan can’t marry her. But it’s too late–Jordan’s afraid to rock the boat, this is what everyone’s expecting of him, it’s easier to just go through with it, and Taylor feels sick about it but still manages to keep his mouth shut and show up for the wedding of his best friend. Until the minister says those words–you know the ones–and suddenly Taylor knows he can’t let Jordan make a choice he would regret for the rest of his life.

Lyrics to title this story: Or Forever Hold Your Peace

Masterpost Playlist

Next >

[teaberrii]

Probably gonna send more asks as you continue the series, but as a reader, I have to say, I found your fic through AO3 initially, but got sucked in. And then I found out you had a tumblr and that you updated it on tumblr too! Tumblr is the more convenient platform for me to read your works on.

Anyway, before I get off track, I wanted to say how much I love your My Boss Is A Cat! Series. Reading the series from the start to now, it's such a rollercoaster, and it's so good. I love the buildup of the relationship between Alhaitham and the reader, and I also like that you explore the additional relationships outside it too.

Especially with this latest update, that intimacy with Alhaitham and the Reader feels well-earned. They took their time getting to know each other, and you did an amazing job planting the seeds for the very satisfying intimate scene in your most recent update. It's so much fun being able to catch hints of your foreshadowing and plot points as I read through the opening chapters of the series.

As a reader, I wanted to say how much I've enjoyed and continue to enjoy this fic. This entire series reads like and feels like it's a full fledged novel, and I'm honestly gobsmacked that you write out these consistent, well-written chapters for free! I always find myself in awe of your writing - not just the word choices you use, but your character development, and pacing. It's something I admire a lot. I've never been bored reading this series, and it's become one of my go-to series to read if I want to lose myself in a story. I have read and re-read this series more times than I can count, and when I see you update, it makes me really happy.

I wanted to let you know that I'm so happy to have found this series, and I'm enjoying every minute of this journey. I do not know where it's going to end, though I have my own theories, and I'm really excited to see how the story continues and how it wraps up.

I know that writing is hard, and this very, very grateful reader wanted to say: Thank you. Thank you so much for writing. I look forward to reading more of your series and following this story until the very end.

Sincerely,

A very grateful anonymous reader

I was doing a facial mask when I read this, and I had to stop halfway or else it would've messed it up cause I was smiling too much. But ANYWAY...

Thank you so much for your kind words. This is one of the lengthiest and most heartfelt comment I ever got, so I really appreciate the time you took to write this.

I am so happy you enjoy MBIMC. It's a story that took me by surprise. I had no plan or direction. The title just came to me, and it got first on a Tumblr poll I ran. So I was iffy on whether I could actually write something substantial out of it.

But now it's a story I am constantly thinking about and determined on finishing. I know a lot of readers usually drop off before a story finishes, but knowing there are people willing on sticking it to the end is extremely motivating.

Thinking about the end makes me have mixed feelings though 😭 like I want it to end but I don't. 💀

Going off on a tangent, I do feel the story could be better. There are some things that I think should have been foreshadowed, developed, or mentioned earlier to make the story stronger.

As a very grateful author to you and all of the other loyal and friendly readers, thank you so much for reading. Before writing on Ao3/Tumblr, I got flack for my writing on another platform, so I'm incredibly grateful for the support.

[risingsouls]

🦎 + Favorite Vegeta Moment and Worst Vegeta Moment?

🦎s for My Work Thoughts || Always Accepting!

[Do I have a favorite Vegeta moment? Canon wise? Uh. For badassery, his fight with 19. He finally became a Super Saiyan and obliterated that fucker. He worked hard for that moment and I was big proud of him...even if 20 minutes after he gets too cocky and gets his shit kicked in by 18 as is the Way of Vegeta. Plus it was his last decent sized win. I also really like when Goku trolls him on the lookout once he gets out of the time chamber. It's too funny.

Favorite like overall? Barring how Super kinda buries it and pretends it didn't happen and how fans misinterpret Buu Saga Vegeta entirely, I think overall favorite moment is him finally finally FINALLY conceding Goku is better than him at the end of the Buu Saga. That moment is him healing, him realizing he hadn't lived for himself or his own life as he obsessed over surpassing Goku, doing what Goku did to get stronger, instead of taking advantage of his freedom from Frieza and doing his own thing. It was supposed to be his moment of self-reckoning and actually moving forward with himself but...well, Super really likes to keep the obsessed with surpassing Goku thing alive. It's not as it could be, but they also continue to be wishy washy with Vegeta. But another convo that I'm sure I've rambled about before. Basically, i like this moment because it's him really healing for the first time and I love that. I disagree with the direction they go because I think that reckoning would bring about A LOT of shit that he never contended with and things he would question and want to change, but it's still a really great moment for him that I don't think gets talked about in the right way enough.

Least favorite. God can i just say 95% of the time he's on screen in Super? I'll pick something outside of Super, how about that? Hm...I'll keep the theme of character alone here. Going along with my favorite, I'll say Majin Vegeta because if you really dig in and think about it, for his character, it shows just how low and desperate he is. Is it badass and is the fight with Goku pretty badass? Sure. It was nice to see Vegeta be ruthless again to some degree. It was great to get to see him and Goku duke it out. However, there's always the looming OOF over the whole thing because a healthy Vegeta wouldn't have made that decision. A healthy Vegeta would have never allowed anyone to potentially control him, let alone give him a power boost. But he never healed from all his trauma, nor was he given space to, and his decision to do the Majin Vegeta thing shows it. Man was not happy or satisfied or content or anything else along those lines with his life and achieving his goals and it's honestly sad. So cool as the moment can be for shallow reasons, in depth, it's probably his saddest moment. And i guess that doesn't mean I dislike it, but looking at it from just as a character standpoint, that's his worst moment. Right up there with swearing off fighting after Cell. Hits hard.

Again sticking with the other response, I'll pick one that's more I hate it because it sucks. Trying to not pick from Super again uuuuh...God my first thought was letting Cell go perfect but I can't even hate that because it's so him 🤣🤣. Same reason why i can't hate getting his shit kicked in by 18; he deserved it. How is this one harder when the character was so shittily written lmao. I guess it's because so many of his moments I'm just like "welp that tracks" so I can't dislike it. I'll go with a Z movie. I hate how they wrote him in the Z Broly movie. Like I get he's feeling pretty down and out but damn. When has that stopped Vegeta? And I get this is saiyan legend coming to fruition and Broly is a monster but again I posit to you: when has that fucking stopped Vegeta? Man thought HE was the legendary Super Saiyan for a whole saga, you think he's gonna roll over and let someone ELSE take the title? Nah. Not today, Satan.

Tho Piccolo manhandling him by the hair is pretty fucking funny.]

[lazodiac]

Have you heard of the Guardian Legend? It's a NES game twin-stick shooter (sorta) that's a metroidvania (kinda) and a puzzle game (I guess) that also turns into a shmup game (this one is 100% true). It's really well loved and someone made an indie game inspired by it and since Robin was too ill to stream Paper Mario Thousand Year Door we streamed this instead here you go.

Video Length: 3:16:35

I don't really have tooo much to say about Astrolancer? It's super good, I love the variety of all its weapons, I like the arcade-y feel of how it doles out upgrades, and the music and sprite-work are top-notch. It plays really well- surprisingly well honestly, I went with the retro controls despite them feeling like they'd be less intuitive than the modern controls but as it turns out the opposite is true. I love the little flourishes here and there that make it feel like a stronger experience; the game over being a bespoke ending, the little ding when your thruster is ready, all that. The cutscenes are also really well written, getting across the vibe and the story without overstaying their welcome or feeling like something that isn't quite a NES title.

I feel like if I have anything negative to say, it's that some of the options feel more "correct" than others. The shotgun is just best for the shmup stages, spread shot that does good damage takes precedent over basically everything imo. The ARMS are interesting but not all of them have an obvious use-case (of course, that's just my read on things). The game is definitely a degree harder than I think most would expect going in- though the ample assist mode options make that work out well.

All in all, I'd say this is a VERY solid game, and worth your time. It currently costs like 7 bucks and that's money you could literally pick up off the street. So give it a look.

Now, as per the bit at the end of the stream… I don't know if I'll be playing through all of Heartless Rampage mode (and if I do I maaay be using the Cheat menu a little). It's an option, if people are interested, so I'll leave that on the table for you all to discuss. I've got other shorter indie games to bide the time while waiting for Robin to feel better (and she may even feel better this Thursday who knows) to play instead. So, the choice is yours!

[brokenmug]

So, finally, after almost a YEAR - I'm back here. [I was wrong, I had written probably the longest piece on my phone, which I totally forgot for nearly a year]

And you may just guess why, or better be, how.

There's just so much I could have written all those months, difficult months, but it wasn't - I might just say - electrifying enough. Yes.

Without throwing any riddles (to whom, by the way, myself, or you AQ?), let's just say ever since I wrote here last - guessing by the title date, otherwise, I honestly still don't know exactly when - I haven't been, glad enough just to have happened to come here. Yeah.

So, without even knowing what I last wrote here, I definitely would arrive at today's feelings by going along how the past year had been. It's just how it works for me.

So... I know I had tried my best, beginning September 2022, or post that month, post that "first" meeting, because I never intended to "go back" to her, to see if we can work out something this time, especially what she told me in that meeting. Ups and downs followed, some really good moments too, but with me coming to the conclusion that she wouldn't do it, and hence, it wouldn't be simply right for us to continue talking. I ended, for many reasons including just for being right. It was March 2023.

We probably talked again a month later, as I do remember somewhat, but then, for things to go down, as was expected, and half-heartedly wanted by me, for next four months, when suddenly or not, I wanted to talk again. That's just me, her, and us. That's how it has always been. For over 10 years by that time, nearly 11, I had hated her, but I had loved her more - much much more. I texted her, to learn how she had been. But it wasn't a welcome thing to happen, just an extremely brief conversation, and with sadness to get over my entire existence. How would I write anything here? What would I tell, or say, to be read later?

And here we are, five months later. Those five months... Probably have been as hard as I can say, something like it was back in the golden days of my life... Yes, the hostel days. My love had resurrected after meeting her after so many years (5 and a half) only for me to unsuccessfully try to move on, once again, beginning with that conversation in March. It never happened. I kept thinking, waiting, expecting, and trying to control the sadness by doing what not? Music? Smoking? Drinking? AQ, you were just simply back, probably stronger than ever... 😞

And that's why, and how, as I said in the beginning, I texted you again, this week, as I wanted to meet you and see how you have been... And not miss a chance to know about your life, and ultimately miss a chance of being together... Well, it was a good conversation, I totally didn't hold up as I had thought - I was high, texting you - you've always been my true high AQ. I felt like you would text, and actually ask if I would be coming to meet. You didn't though, and naturally, being upset about it, I decided I would not go and would tell you before the weekend ends. And I did. But it turned out differently, again. You know it well, you know it sooo well AQ since campus days, as I always said it too, it's probably in this blog too already, that I could never stay angry at you for long. And so, you won this time, too. You always did. It was an ecstatic moment talking to you like an hour ago.

I mean, wow, all those years, that decade; togetherness, breakups, closeness, breaking up, separation, long years apart, moving on, you marrying too, and then meeting again, days reminiscing, and apart again... And here I am, still in touch, still able to just exchange our words with each other... 😞 Then why, why, why not permanently together? So lucky after like 7 years of permanent separation, I'm still with you somehow 💔 that's more time than us actually being together those 5 years... Then why not together my AQ? Buht aayin gayin yaaden, magar is baar tumhi ana... I don't want to let you go. I just want to stay in touch. Yes, things have changed. I said, last year, that if we couldn't work up for it, then it's better to not stay in touch. Last year? I said like a few days ago, I wanted to know just for the last time what were you thinking, but no! I am here. Just stay around AQ ❤️

So, isn't that the perfect time to come back here and write?

Signing off for now, AJ.

[a-tale-of-legends]

So uh. I put this in my drafts cause in mobile the asks are written funny when I try to answer them. But for some reason I can't go back and edit it???????? Which is. Weird. Good thing I took a screen shot.

Anyway.

( points to May/Brendan, Calem/Serena, Ethan/Lyra, Dawn/Lucas) Do they mean nothing to you anon /j Buuuut yeah, from the looks of it most protags are separate via timelines. I don't usually have a problem with this, since so far whenever there's an npc protag they aren't really doing....much. If you're lucky you get a Dawn/Lucas or Serena/Calem that tries to be very active in the plot, but outside of that they aren't much of a character. Calem/Serena tried to be buuuuut they failed imo. I think it really comes down the fact that if there's more than one protagonist in the game, one is gonna be less of a blank slate that the player can project on than the other. Which isn't a bad thing, I love giving the protags some personalities ( it's partially what started the Legendverse), but the whole point of the silent protag is for the player to project onto them. That, and Gamefreak sure doesn't make them as interesting as they could be. Lyra/Ethan are the biggest offenders of this imo. They. Really don't do much outside of tutorial stuff. You don't battle them, you don't fight with them, you rarely get any real depth from them like. I hate saying it, but if they weren't in the story at all it wouldn't have changed things, which really sucked to say cause I like HGSS. All of this is to say that this is why I have dual protags in my au. For granted,almost all of them are ocs, but they still share the protag title, just separated by "main" and "secondary".

Okay with all of that out of the way, to your ask anon. When it comes to hc about Juliana and Florian, it's...well it's not hard but it's annoying. Bc visually they're just Gloria and Victor 2. At least at first. Ironically I think the dlc art actually gives me a few ideas. This I'm treating these two as separate characters, so no genderfluid Florian/Juliana today.

Juliana: An excitable girl with a love for battling. Is known to throw rules away in favor of something more "fun"....whatever that is. She's generally very brash, and doesn't exactly think before acting. This bit her in the back Teal Mask, however. Afterwards she kinda.....lessened in terms of her usual energetic self. She became more serious and stoic faced- still Juliana, always Juliana, but the events of Teal Mask really brought her down. The last thing she ever wanted to do is to hurt a friend. In Indigo Disk she kinda adopts this serious, no nonsense persona which is admittedly, very weird, even for her. Seeing Kieran the way he is kinda makes it worse. She's a bit more....angry here. Whether it's at herself, others, Kieran, no one knows. She probably doesn't know. But through it all she just wants to make things right again.

Florian: The opposite of Juliana: a fucking nerd. Moreso wanting to focus on his studies than anything else, Florian is a skittish, rule follower to the T. Too bad the plot of SV ( and Juliana if we're doing dual protags) drags him into nonsense. But honestly it's a good thing overall. He becomes less rigid, a bit less fearful. He actually ends up enjoying himself more than he ever does and even makes some amazing friends to boot. Teal Mask was great for him! Until it wasn't. I like to think he bonded with Kieran very easily, both being somewhat shy, and an admiration of those who they deem stronger than them. When things hit the fan I think Florian was.....off. He was hurt. Very hurt. And he definitely beat himself over it. But he never let it show? In fact it seems that he's gotten more carefree as time goes on and a smidge more interested in battling. By Indigo Disk, Florian just seems like a brand new person. He seems more confident, more carefree, even leaning into Drayton's jokes a little. And yet, when he sees Kieran that mask sorta cracks. He's scared out of his mind. He doesn't know what to say or do no matter how much he thinks about it. But better do retreat, than face it head on, right? In the end, he just wants the same thing as Juliana, but is struggling to find an answer.

This post is getting long so I'm just gonna end it here. Sorry to anyone who wanted to see Gloria and Victor! But I hope you enjoy these hcs! They were fun to make!

[luxrayz64]

I used 2 be one of those people throwing fits bc I thought idw shadow was poorly written but honestly he would say that. especially where sonic is involved he WOULD say that

like the metal virus scene? ok hang on

so shadow's whole deal is that he is the ultimate life form. he was born and created to be the ultimate life form. it IS his identity. this is who I am and all that.

in sa2, particularly at the end once he's outlived his creator and purpose he gives up the title and gives it to sonic. there is someone else out there who is a better, more ultimate life form than him. there is someone else out there who was born with the speed and power shadow was engineered to have just out of sheer random chance.

in future titles, shadow has forgotten his creator and purpose and sought one out on his own - he is the ultimate life form and he has faith in that. he no longer needs the validation of his creator and given purpose.

EXCEPT

he's still not the most ultimate life form out there - because sonic is still here, and still matches shadow's strength blow for blow. now though, shadow is very interested in "being alive" and "moving forward" and "not getting so lost in his own grief he tries to kill everyone and also himself". he's not willing to give up his title. ultimate life form is who he is, and it's FRUSTRATING having someone else out there who could be stronger than him

so now, when met with sonic, shadow doesn't just give up. he challenges him. belittles him. talks himself up and dismisses sonic. when something like the metal virus comes up, and sonic has to run away because he's infected... that's a chance for shadow to assert to himself, sonic, and everyone else, that he is indeed the ultimate life form. after all, he's immune to every disease. cowards don't run.

only for him to violently remember that the metal virus didn't exist when shadow was created, and for him to become infected.

his need to prove himself and assert his superiority is a character flaw, but it really does make sense - shadow was born with a purpose and lost that purpose. he was given an identity, and then lost that identity. being sure of your own identity when so much of what you were and why you exist was violently stripped away from you is really hard! it makes sense that he'd feel threatened by sonic. 'ultimate' is who he is.

it's a coping mechanism. not a good one, but they rarely are. shadow is a massive fucking egotistical prick covering up insecurities

[inked-out-trees]

Ok!

12 for Trevor

13

And I think 18

ok!!!! :)

sorry i rambled a lot so i'm readmoreing this LMAO

12. Character + Dialogue (Trevor)

“I’m putting up a sign. If your name is Annie Twilloil or Francis Beaumont, fuck off. Rabid cat inside. Or whatever.” Trevor waves a sleepy hand in the air. “Something something I’ll bite you.” (Chapter 2)

13. Talk about your growth from your first fic to now.

oh boy. it's been almost eight years. or maybe it has been eight years. you're sending me back to wattpad, buddy, i don't know if i can forgive that (fully joking).

i started writing my first real fic (for academic purposes we are talking about the first thing i posted, not all my elementary school flights of fancy) in junior high, mostly in spurts on the bus or back and forth on a shitty little usb drive that also carried my schoolwork. i'm pretty sure the main document was password protected and in a folder labeled something totally innocuous because i was thirteen and painfully embarrassed about writing supernatural fanfiction as though anyone else would ever use my memory stick, like, ever. flash forward to today where the writing folder on my laptop is 90% fic and i Do Not Care Anymore! but still with weird titles because that's just how these things go.

(but also shoutout to my first fic, which according to wattpad is still #939 in supernatural fic after alll these years. it's got a little medal next to it and everything. fuck yeah!)

when i read it i see a lot of things that mark a young writer - mostly characterisation issues, things that could be portrayed better, I hadn't gotten the hang of internal monologues yet so it's quite painfully objective (in comparison to my current taste and style). but, like, honestly? not bad. not bad at all. full respect to thirteen-year-old me for sticking through and writing, like, a full 50 thousand word thing without even realising it.

("alright, i did the math and, with various author's notes included because i wasn't going to put any more effort into this than what wattpad gave me, our wordcount for this fic was... 52,385. my third longest fic to date" -from a conversation with a friend a couple months ago, timestamp almost 2am. moral of the story: wattpad give us word counts please)

ANYWAY. aside from the, you know, wattpad stuff, what propelled me forward on that particular fic was both the existence of a full story in my head (and then some. rest in peace to the abandoned sequel) and some pretty cool folks to share it with. not stopping - and, indeed, writing more spn stuff before finally metamorphasis-ing into a theatre kid - was prompted through friends. so. friends are the reason for everything. another reason for everything was my move from wattpad to ao3, which happened somewhere in my move from junior high to high school (very symbolic i know) and subsequently allowed for such things as: greater audience! a comment section! sophistication! all the cool kids use ao3!

and, like, even ao3 era onwards. from 2016's newsies works to now there's like. improvement in plotting and planning! character voice and internal monologue! fun with structure! music! all these funky fresh things that i'm always so excited to work with. i don't even really have words to describe it anymore i just think it's fun as hell. it's just like. i will keep writing and i will keep getting better and these things are perpetual. and in several years with even more work under my belt i will be able to look back at what i've been doing the past couple years and do the exact same thing.

but all my love remains to the password-protected word docs that hold those supernatural fics from an earlier time. some of them saw the light of day and some of them straight up did not. all of them are still in my heart.

18. Share a line from a fic you'll never finish.

("cornley time travel au: is significantly better written, stronger interpersonal relationships, i actually know what i'm doing / supernatural OC apocalypse fic: written when my hubris knew no limits, has demons in the story. oh and em-dashes. i only started using em-dashes in like 2017" -same conversation as above)

remember how i wrote a sequel (threequel) to the lookout mmnis? i was also fully prepared to write a sequel to flat pack attack. rest in peace to flat pack attack: homeworld which will probably never see the light of day. the idea was good and a kid can dream

SAMPSON: You ever heard of… (reading from a page) a tailsman?

DELTA: Is it a talisman you mean?

Sampson squints at the page.

SAMPSON: No, this says tails. Like a monkey.

He sticks a hand near the base of his chair and does a tail approximation.

oh and secondary shoutout to another abandoned newsies au that drew on my experiences with high school theatre tech, aptly named welcome to hell - its namesake was something like:

He catches a glimpse of the whiteboard once again before he leaves. Someone, probably Jack again, has wiped out most of the letters in HOTEL CALIFORNIA - now it just reads WELCOME TO H EL L.