#his characterization suffers the most in fanfics

[y0ur-fr1endly-queer]

Bill Williamson.

There’s a lot of mischaracterization about Bill.

From what I’ve seen, it's like they’ve made him another Micah. They characterize him as an extra antagonist, and it upsets me. Did you guys even play the game? And if you did, you clearly didn’t look at camp interactions.

Bill ain’t just some angry fool, he’s a character with a very deep story that's looked past.

And when I say these things I want ya’ll to know I support nothing of what he did in rd1. I don't know what that thing was. I don't support specific interactions that he's had in camp, either.

Bill has done bad things, and there are things I won't forgive him for, but that's just like the other characters. These guys are a gang of outlaws, they are not perfect, and some people try and make it seem that way.

As clearly stated in the game, Bill struggles a lot with alcoholism, he practically drinks himself to death and takes it out on other people. I believe that he never wanted to be this way, but I also believe it numbed him and he put a coating of, "I deserve it." On top of it.

Bill has clearly been through a lot, I’m sure hes suffered from his time in the army and possibly childhood experiences and just life in general. He has feelings, and sometimes he cant control those feelings. That doesn’t make him just angry, or just an asshole. He’s still a person, not some antagonist placeholder in peoples fanfics or role plays.

When Sean died, he was blamed, and if you look at a specific interaction in camp you can see how much that hurt him, I don't remember the lines exactly, but it's actually the most guilty I've ever seen him (Sean’s death crushed me and that interaction made it so much sadder). What I remember is that he explained to Arthur how he didn’t know and didn’t mean it, almost as if he was trying to explain it to himself as well as convince himself. He was crying, I'm pretty sure.

He clearly struggles with his emotions and doesn't like to talk to people about it, about anything. I think when he opened up to Arthur about Sean was the first time in the entire game.

He's so well-written and has so much story underneath what's obvious.

@cupidsbeartrap and I rant about this guy so much.

[feralforbeanix]

Wrightworth is not "Sunshine x Grumpy"

They are "Visibly Traumatized x Repressed Trauma", they are bitch for bitch, they are so many more interesting things than that overused dynamic.

Miles is not some sad boy who needs to be coddled, he is a grown ass adult who sent many people to jail. Some of which could have possibly been innocent. He's done some shitty things that are influenced yes--but not excused by his trauma. He can and SHOULD be called out on things he did, stop blaming all his bad actions on Manfred or Gant.

Phoenix is not a golden retriever boyfriend. Maybe he was in college when he was "Feenie" but that shit ended the day Dahlia was arrested (Hot take Feenie feels more ooc to the Phoenix we knew in the trilogy than Beanix ever did to me). Phoenix is a snarky bitch almost all the time, even thinking/saying downright mean things to/about people he cares about like Maya. He has massive big brother energy but not always in the "I'll take care of you" way but often in the "I'm gonna disgust/upset/annoy you on purpose because I think it's funny" way. (Like if you choose the fishing pole in Turnabout Goodbyes, he teases Maya by suggesting they use Missile as bait, which Maya takes as well as you'd expect).

Miles is not a princess who waited every day for Phoenix to save him. Miles was perfectly content to forget his past entirely as is his coping mechanism, and Phoenix has a savior complex that no one asked him to have. Miles never asked for Phoenix to reappear in his life, Phoenix just realized Miles was gonna ignore him, so he became a lawyer himself so that would no longer be an option for Miles.

This isn't to say Wrightworth is a bad ship by any means. This is to say that their characterization and relationship are so often blatantly misunderstood by the fandom. So often watered down to fit a basic mold. Which is a shame because their actual relationship is so much more interesting to me.

Sooo many fanfics get both of their characters wrong to either fit a dynamic they never were or because they want to give them less accountability than they deserve.

[battlekidx2]

I'm making this post purely to shout out some incredibly talented fanfic writers from the Hazbin Hotel fandom and my favorite works of theirs.

Did anyone ask me for this? No. Will I post it anyway? Absolutely. The writers in this fandom are too good.

The first fanfic writer I want to shout out is @prince-liest (ao3 link)

I absolutely love their get cared for idiot (Alastor) series (not the official name but they called it that in one of their asks jokingly so it's now the default in my head).

Knock, Knock! It's Your Worst Fucking Nightmare! (this fic gets it!!!! This is what I meant when I said Alastor is growing a heart and part of him is raging against it. He still has ulterior motives and a massive amount of pride and part of him feels like that growing fondness is getting in the way, but he can't stop it. I need to stop before this becomes a long ramble. I've written a couple thousand words on this idea, but this fic is just a better use of your time than any meta I could ever write and way more entertaining :D )

Happily Ever After, and Other Shit Nepotism Can't Buy

The Last Bus Stop in Hell, Now Boarding (Please look at the tags for content warning. Angel and Alastor body swap story.)

They're amazing at balancing on that razor's edge with Alastor where there's a heart in there (really deep) and he's unintentionally growing attached to the hazbin crew, but he doesn't lose his edge. He's still manipulative and an asshole and can easily be the scariest guy in any room. He's in hell for a reason. A+ characterization at all times.

They're so good at writing the complicated dynamics he has with the residents, especially Charlie, and I enjoy how they expand on Alastor's potential dynamic with Angel Dust.

Anything they write from Lucifer's POV is gold too! My favorites are:

Take Two and Leave a Voicemail!

The Care and Keeping of Homo Angelus

I am also 100% here for their Aro!Alastor agenda and I'm enjoying their fic I Love Her, I Love Her Not so far!

The second person I want to shout out is @grayintogreen (ao3 link)

Their series Red Roses and Dead Things consistently gut punches me.

Just like Princeliest, they are also fantastic at balancing on that razor's edge with Alastor. A+ characterization for everyone and I love how they write HuskerDust. It's so soft, especially in the aftermath fic for Learn that Even Death May Die called If My Love Is Tomorrow, I've Forgotten Yesterday (that fic hurt in the best way).

The way they explore the aftermath of Learn that Even Death May Die is incredibly impactful. They capture the unique grief that comes from the reality that there are some things you won't get closure for so well that it's painful.

I can't say enough good things about their series. Genuinely go read it.

I found @lediz-watches (ao3 link) before the first season of Hazbin Hotel dropped (I've been a fan of the hellaverse for a few years now and have been enthralled with the Hazbin Hotel pilot since I first watched it in 2020) and I really enjoy their fics.

My favorite is Suffering Kindness. I love the Charlie and Alastor dynamic they explore in this story. I think I'm just a sucker for the Charlie and Alastor dynamic in general, but this fic hits all the right notes for me. (written pre-season 1 but man is it good. 100% recommend)

LeDiz also has a lot of one-shots/collections of one-shots that are very fun.

The Cure for Inexorable Boredom

Dollface (one-shots about Alastor theories. My favorite is the 3rd one. So fascinating!)

Choice Words (one of the few explorations of Alastor and Vaggie's dynamic that I've found in the fandom)

Don't Say It

I have to shout out @ckret2 (ao3 link) and their phenomenal fic You’ve Got a Face for Radio. This is such an amazing aroace!Alastor fic. (Embarrassingly it was this fic that made me realize I was most likely aroace myself. I’d had fleeting moments of suspecting it but it wasn’t until I saw my experiences laid out in a character explicitly written to be aroace that I put the puzzle pieces together. -_- some of these passages were too relatable.) I cannot express how much I love this fic.

I also like their fics Dumpster Baby and Bitter Grapes.

I have one last writer I want to mention because this is getting really long (whoops). The last one is tiredoflofteranditsshit and their Assume He Has a Heart series (because my favorite character and how I interpret them was not obvious enough already with the fics/authors I've recommended. I had to make it more obvious).

These fics are massive (17k and 26k words) and so much fun. Definitely worth the read. Yet another series that follows up season 1 and explores Alastor’s growing connections and how he lies to himself and pushes against it. Love this series and there’s a lot to sink your teeth into :D

[distort-opia]

What kind of non lethal crimes do you think Joker would pivot to in a relationship with Bruce? I'm thinking about your REMS characterization. Also thinking about a line from Joker in the last chapter, about not throwing his career down the shitter and killing to defend himself. What would a career look like for him being with Bruce? Surely he would still be incredibly silly about them, with varying levels of violence that *just* teeters the edge. Love your work!

Glad you like my work, thank you! Hmm, what I had in mind when writing that in REMS (or for a sequel) was Joker's penchant for... well, breaking people and exposing hypocrisy, but minus the murder. With his love of drama and performance sprinkled on top, of course; as you say, he'd never stop being silly.

He usually kills indiscriminately, yes, because he considers himself as just playing into the cruel meaninglessness of the world. But the reason why Joker fixated on Batman, and why his M.O. includes using a gas that basically forces people to see the world like he does right before they die, is Joker's need to prove a point. He wants people to admit that there's no order to life and that tragedy can strike at any time; he wants Gotham to realize how arbitrary rules are, and Batman happens to be the perfect embodiment of that.

So I think that a Joker who won't murder anymore would basically create situations in which people's darkest sides are exposed, to various degrees of seriousness and violence. And not only that-- he would do things that would expose the ridiculousness and heinousness of the world people live in. Capitalism and its self-cannibalizing focus on profit, the skewed interests of the government, the suffering of the poor... Joker's already done this sort of thing, it's not much of a stretch. For example, seeing how many people we're being hurt as a result of superhero fights, one time Joker promised to pay the medical bills of each Gothamite that posted a video on the DC equivalent of Facebook... but only if they shouted the word "Balyushka" and then did something ridiculous to make him laugh:

Batman: Gotham Nights #6 ("Balyushka!")

And he keeps his word! But of course, this creates utter chaos, because people are doing fucking crazy shit to get that money. And the thing is, he doesn't do this just for funsies. He has a point, and Bruce can't help but admit it:

Batman: Gotham Nights #6 ("Balyushka!")

Joker exposed the problems that Batman could not tackle with fists, and then Bruce listened. He actually used his money and influence to help.

Ironically, again, it's not the first time Joker did something that made Bruce go "Hmm, maybe I should look into the systemic corruption":

Batman: Gotham Nights #4 ("The Dragnet")

I won't go into too much detail, but Joker paid Harleen Quinzell's tuition without much prompting, he went and helped (in his own way) a child who wrote to him and was clearly being abused... it's about the cases he can empathize with. And they're all connected to his own life-ruining trauma. Red Hood fell into the vat most of all because of poverty. Because he had no choice except to turn to crime-- otherwise him and his family would not have had food to put on the table. So of course he hates the society he lives in, one that had no safety nets or mercy for people like him who were drowning.

This is a very long-winded way to say that I imagine a non-lethal Joker being a mix of this and... stupid ass pranks on a massive scale, because let's be honest, he wouldn't give them up. He just wouldn't kill people at the end (because it'd make his boyfriend sad).

fanfic writer ask game - director's commentary

[sunflowerdigs]

The thing that irritates me most about this whole ship war is the way it's such a reminder of the enduring strength of white male privilege. Lou isn't even a very talented actor, but all he had to do was show up for 2 minutes and half the fandom decided to forget 6 years of Eddie Diaz's characterization and dedication to Buck. Eddie literally gave Buck his child, but people are saying Tommy is the first person to really care about Buck. Like, I can't imagine a man of color or a woman having a similar effect (I don't even have to imagine the latter, as I've seen how all of Buck's female love interests have been treated, especially those with problematic pasts - seriously, if you couldn't forgive Taylor for what she did to Bobby despite Bobby giving the relationship his blessing, why are you calling on the fandom to get over what Tommy did to Chim and Hen? It's the same thing, but, wait, no it's not, because Tommy is white and a dude and, lbr, the suffering of minorities at the hands of racists and their subsequent inevitable forgiveness of those racists despite the lack of any clear apology has been normalized in media to a pretty distressing extent).

And then in order to try and justify their behavior, I see a lot of people trying to claim Ryan and Lou are the same racially (even as their behavior and preferential treatment of Tommy demonstrates that they clearly aren't). As though Ryan, as a white Latino man, has access to the same privileges that Lou does as a white man, which is bonkers. You notice how no one even thought to question whether Lou was ok with playing gay as Tommy, despite his father's friendship with Trump; meanwhile, I can't go a single day without seeing people assume that Ryan is the reason Buddie hasn't happened without knowing jack shit about him. And don't even get me started on how people often prioritize Buck's happiness over Eddie's even while claiming to care about them both, or how often Eddie is written as insanely jealous in fanfic even though, canonically, that's a Buck trait. Ryan isn't white in the minds of fans, even if on a very technical racial level he is, and that's an important wrinkle in the discourse that I see a lot of people trying to flatten.

[iwriteasfotini]

This is probably a VERY unpopular opinion, but I just saw a post about Jily becoming a secondary ship, I'm assuming to Jegulus? Ok, I'm not a ship purist, but I ship Jegulus over Jily (I can enjoy Jily fics though). My problem with Jily stems from canon Severus. I'm sorry, but you don't obsess about someone for like +20 years who doesn't love you back (and you don't get to be one of the most memorable characters of a seven book series if that is all you have going for you). I think there is bit more going on with Sev and Lily than we see in canon, namely because Harry is a horribly biased narrator where Slytherins are concerned, and Lily is long dead. And Sev doesn't want Harry to know anything about his past. We can be dogmatic and say it's because he regrets passing along the prophecy information which ended up getting Lily killed. Or we can be creative and think about other reasons why Severus wouldn't want Harry to know about his past. Maybe because it would be weird to tell your student (who looks EXACTLY like your arch nemesis from your school years, whose mother is your soul mate, and whose godfather is another one of your arch nemesis) "yeah, so your mom and I were destined for each other but couldn't be together because we ran in conflicting social circles in dangerous times, and your dad was in love with my other best friend (sorta stole him right out from under me to be honest), who was a dude by the way, and yet somehow you were conceived. But I promise they all loved you Harry."

Also, I've decided Lily was a badass (this is definitely hinted at in canon but not capitalized on at all). Badass Lily Evans and loving, doting, supportive James Potter doesn't work for me. I also think Regulus was a badass (also could be seen as hinted at in canon baring Sirius' annoying comments to Harry about Regulus which I may just end up pretending didn't happen; sometimes adult Sirius is more of a teenager than actual teenage Harry) and for some reason badass Regulus with loving, doting, supportive James Potter works much better. Sorry James, your badassery is limited to the Quidditch Pitch, your Transfiguration spell work, and how much you adore/support your badass boyfriend. But you're still an awesome guy.

Now I just have to figure out exactly what went down when Harry was conceived... and my head canon will be complete.

BTW my HC Lily is bi. And does NOT let Sev and all his annoying character complications hold her back. But yeah, Lily and Sev are "Always."

And I realize I actually aired two unpopular opinions Snily and Sev and Regulus being friends. I guess it depends on what other fanfics you have read which have stuck with you, because I haven't read any which have Sev and Reg as friends (although I can't remember what their dynamic was in Choices), but for some reason I've always assumed they would have been (they are only a year apart in age, both Slytherins, and both a bit moody, IDK?). Characterization of Sev is important here though, because I don't portray him as a dick. And the adult he turns into (bit more of a dick than he is as a teen, which I have some straight up issues with in canon) is born from immense suffering and trauma. Story of the Marauders if we are being honest.

[allastoredeer]

I read the new chapter of Holy Suffering as soon as it came out and I love the way u write Lucifer. For the past few days I have been reading Radio apple fanfic and I hate how lucifer is portrayed in most of them, shy , innocent with Alastor after the fight, and kinda out of character for the both of them, cause they suddenly like each other, and I don’t see it in them. They like to piss each other off, that’s the whole ship point.

Ur Lucifer is so sassy, Hits all the Good Characterization checks in my brain, he’s such a delight to read, same for Alastor. U had me going speechless most of the time Alastor spoke, cause I honestly didn’t know what he was gonna say next. Writing Alastor it’s probably hard, cause he is misterious and always hides his emotions but You totally nailed it. Right now he is probably angry at Lucifer cause he ratted him out lol

Al be like the audacity of this man after he forced him to do this.🙄

Anywhizzle I just wanted to ask, for the overload meeting, is Charlie gonna send Lucifer with Alastor? Maybe as a snake or something, to make sure is he okay. Cause she really sounded mortified that she didn’t notice that Alastor was suffering and man Al definitely didn’t like that, but it’s not like he can say no to Charlie so

A nd is there like a schedule for next updates? I am really invested in this story and I honestly can’t wait to read more of it.

Thank you ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ Hahah Lucifer's got bite to him, for sure. He doesn't come off as the shy type to me. Awkward as hell, certainly. In the throes of depression, absolutely. And he cares about Charlie's opinion of him to a fault. But when it comes to someone throwing their weight around--or, more accurately, getting involved with Charlie (cough Alastor helping Charlie with the hotel, couch Adam fighting/hurting Charlie cough) he isn't afraid of getting his hands dirty.

Alastor is hard to write ಥ_ಥ I love him so much, but sometimes, I want to cut open his head and properly study his brain because f;knslnjsbj out of all the characters, he's the hardest for me to pin down, in terms of both dialogue and actions. He has such a way of talking, and such a distinct voice (his radio filter) that it's simultaneously easy to imagine his voice, but hard to put it to dialogue. So, I really appreciate hearing that I nailed it (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) Seriously, it's so appreciated to hear.

Nah, Alastor is going to be going to that one alone :3 It's going to be set in his POV, so we'll get some insight in his thoughts on the whole thing, and how he's handling his current affliction. I'm both excited to and nervous to get into it, because writing him in someone else's POV is hard, so writing him in his OWN POV is a little intimidating, but I'm mostly excited. I have a lot of thoughts for this series, and it's gonna be fun to explore them.

As for a schedule, I used to try to keep myself to one, and I've found that I have both a love/hate relationship with it. One the one hand, keeping a writing schedule is nice because it gives me a clear view of what I want to work on and an goal date to get it done, which is very nice for my ADHD brain.

BUT, on the other hand, when I start putting that pressure on myself to get it down, and I fail to actually reach that goal, it hits me pretty hard and it can take away my motivation and joy in writing the fic. It starts to feel more like a chore than a fun hobby I can do in my downtime.

Thankfully, I am DEEP in Hazbin Hotel hyperfixation, and the amazing feedback I've gotten from my fic's is certainly fueling my motivation. So thanks to everyone leaving kudos and comments! It's seriously so helpful and I cherish ever single one of them.

If I had to give an estimate for when the next installment of the series will drop, I'd say either at the end of this week, or the beginning/middle of next week. I have an unrelated AppleRadio one-shot I want to bust out before I work on the next installment, and that one I'm going to try and post by Thursday or Friday.

To quote out favorite Radio Demon,

~Stay Tuned

[saikolikes]

Aki’s P5R  fanfic recs! (part 2)

Hi and welcome to another one of my recs posts! As you can see, this is part two: part one of this post can be found HERE and includes fics I bookmarked between April 2019 and December 2020. This second post will deal with everything I bookmarked during 2021 and 2022 (... so yes, part 3 is bound to happen some times in the future)

Here a brief disclaimer:

Everything in here is spoiler for either P5 vanilla, Royal, or Strikers;

I won’t report the tags, as it would take too long, so if you’re interested in a fic, please open the link;

Fic recs obviously reflect my tastes and preferences. For example, I love suffering and I don’t like fluff or domestic works, so browse this list knowing that;

The stark majority of the works here is shuakeshu

If you want more recs you can find them in my bookmarks, most of them are public!

MY ONGOING RECS Again, I don't read a lot of ongoing works (although, admittedly more than in the past) and these are the ones I'm subscribed to that I'm adoring!

The Lovers, Reversed by salexectria, Terra5 (E) | Royalty a/b/o AU | akeshu | series in three parts, ongoing "A Thief is caught stealing from the Northern King, and is sentenced to death for his crimes. The Alpha Prince intervenes, but at what cost to them both?" What I love about this AU is the amount of politics and worldbuilding put into it, as well as the uniqueness of double povs who constantly switch from Akira to Goro creating one back and forth that acts literally like poking into their minds. Plus the slow burn and the pining are just on point.

never die when I'm dead by threerings (E) | Royal & post-Royal | akeshu | series in 2 parts, ongoing Two one shots featuring one of my absolute flavors of this ship: sad, intense and unhinged

IDC FOR UPDATES I resolved to defeat my abandoned-wip trauma one excellent fic at a time so here's a list of works that haven't been updated in a while or the author straight up confirmed they won't keep writing them, but they are so good you just have to read them and let them remodel you. Do it. Do it now.

the year of the knife by theexistentiallyqueer (M) | No powers AU | shuakeshu | 2 chapters "The plan for Akira's junior year of high school was to keep his head down and his nose clean, but he hadn't counted on his new high school having more trouble than it was worth--and he specifically didn't plan on Akechi Goro, the haughty, machiavellian vice president of Shujin Academy's student council, dragging him face-first into political scandal and a series of encounters that would change his life." Please let teq bring you through a journey of spot-on characterization and stunning prose that will rewire your brain chemistry completely. Their take on machiavellian Akechi is really good, and the snark Akira spits in this fic is really something I cherish.

kiss & cry by MajorGodComplex (T) | Figure skating AU | shuakeshu | 2 chapters "Goro’s first thought when he hits the ground is some combination of the words ‘shit fuck hell fucking bullshit bitch fuck motherfucking hell.’ His next thought is wondering whether Akira Kurusu, senior debut, constant thorn in Goro’s side, and the only person anyone this season seems to talk about, is also trying to land a quad axel at the moment." I don't know what to tell you, the prose of this one is so witty and funny you just have to read what's published of it as of now!

honeybrains by succubused (T) | Time loop | shuakeshu | 4 chapters "a chronicle of the twenty-fourth time akira kurusu lived through the month of january 2017" What can I say, I am really a sucker for time loops and this fic took me by the heart. Tagged as character study and with rights because the characterization here is very interesting!

in the snow globe by aminami (E) | Time travel | shuake | 1 chapter "It’s your heart,” Joker says like it’s the most obvious thing. “Your desires, your hopes, your fears. I’ll carry them with me always. My little snow globe." This fic will hurt you so badly but it will be so worth it, I swear. It's just so melancholic and tender and angsty and it carved a place in my heart.

my love has never lived indoors by rhodophytae (E) | a/b/o | shuake | 1 chapter "Ren Amamiya knows he's an alpha, and he's comfortable with that, but he's pretty sure that being an alpha is, well...different for him than it is for other people. He resigned himself a long time ago to the fact that he'd probably go his whole life without finding anyone else like him. And then he meets Goro Akechi." This fic has such an interesting take on omegaverse! Paired with a stellar characterization and delicious pining, it's no surprise it's a fic I will never forget.

GENERAL RECS The fics I’ve enjoyed the most and that I go back to reading sometimes.

how joker and crow survived the coronavirus pandemic of 2020 by shntlvs (T) | Royal | shuakeshu | series of 2 works "Escaping from Maruki's false reality gets interrupted by the Coronavirus pandemic." Could you have ever imagined reading a fic centered around the pandemic? Me neither, but this one and its sequel work so well and have very compelling bits of characterization for the boys. Unexpected premise, but I utterly loved it.

straw house, straw dog by caelam (T) | 3rd sem | gen | one shot "In the saccharine utopia of Maruki’s reality, Goro Akechi’s mother is still alive." I admittedly don't read too many fics with mamakechi so I won't claim to be an expert, but this one really left me impressed with how clear and tangible the tangle of feelings is.

Knight of Pentacles, King of Spades by Naometry (M) | Medieval AU | shuakeshu | 11 chapters "“Hifumi passed on your greetings,” Akira Kurusu says, fury simmering beneath his conversational tone. “And I’m polite enough to give you my own in person. So greetings, General Goro Akechi. I am the man who will kill you.”" I started reading this fic for the war captive trope but this story has so much more to it than just that. Nao's superb skill with writing violence and viciousness will have you thrust into a cruel world where two boys seem to be bound to kill each other... unless?

Ripples by Riona (T) | gen | canon compliant | one shot "Ten people know exactly who the news is talking about, and now they’re going to have to deal with that." A peek into the heads of 10 of Joker's confidants upon learning about his death. The fic I would never imagined myself reading, but I did because it was recced to me, and now I'm recc'ing it to you, too.

When Your Eyes Meet Mine by seths_dream (E) | no powers AU | shuake | one shot "The way the bellboy lingered on him made his heart jolt, made him think that maybe, maybe the bellboy was looking at Goro the same way Goro was looking at him." I've lost count of how many times I read this fic because the horny is just so juicy, it's unironically one of the fics I come back to when I need to remind myself how to write horny stuff. (the same author also wrote this delicious pegoryu that you have to read)

a study in what not to say by succubused (T) | 3rd sem | shuake | one shot "Akira has finally had enough of Akechi's bullshit; they resolve it the only ways they know how." If you like the boys being really nasty to each other, this fic is a must. It has excellent dialogue, dynamics, and a tad of homoerotic wound tending which can't hurt no one!

MY ALL-TIME FAVOURITES The fics that rewired my brain chemistry, took my heart out, slapped it, put it back, and left me a whole new person.

27 steps to seduce a crow by relationshipcrimes (G) | Royal | shuakeshu | one shot "A handy bullet-pointed list on how to flirt with, seduce, and keep your local Akechi Goro." Still to this day, I think of this fic in terms of Goro's characterization. If I have a thing for post-canon shuake chasing each other, it's probably due to this one.

The Brigverse by TzviaAriella (E but most works are M) | Pirates AU | akeshuake | series, ongoing I admittedly don't care that much about pirates but the og fic from this series (A Brig Too Far) was being passed on so much that I gave it a try and. Oh boy. Not only is the characterization impeccable, the story compelling, and the action thrilling, but at least one scene and/or line from each work in this series has altered my brain permanently. I am a new person after reading Brigverse.

wild and free by bangandawhimper (E) | a/b/o | shuakeshu | one shot "Akira Kurusu hasn’t always been an omega. But now everyone he meets in this city assumes he’s an omega. He’s treated like an omega. He feels like an omega. He knows he feels like an omega because he remembers what it was to be an alpha." This work might have my favourite take ever on shuakeshu omegaverse, it's so fitting for them, so thought out, and the characterization is so on point... my god. Read this fic now.

The Diamond Chest by kinneas (E) | post-Royal | shuakeshu | 3 chapters, complete "Who says you have to see Morgana speak in the Metaverse before you can hear him in the real world? Not the few hundred officers who arrested Ren in Sae’s Palace two years ago, that’s for sure." Honestly everything kinnes writes is gold but I'm shouting this fic out because I reread more than a few scenes from this fic more than once, and it's a 100k-words baby. I am a sucker for heist stories, I am a sucker for dealing with trauma in very tangible ways, and I'm a sucker for kinneas' characterization of the boys.

before midnight by specterthief (Not rated) | 3rd sem, canon compliant | gen | one shot "“I—” Swallowing past the lump in her throat, Sumire sets down her chopsticks and rubs her face with both hands. “Um—who told you I was going to training camp?” (On January 9th, Sumire goes home.)" This is the stellar Sumire characterization fic you're looking for. Read this. Read this right now.

I HOPE THIS DOESN'T AWAKEN SOMETHING IN ME (DELUSIONAL) I clicked on these fics solely due to my trust in the authors/the summary/one rec and now I find myself with a new kink. Thanks.

Containment Breach by salexectria (E) | Space pirates AU | akeshu | one shot Akira gets stranded on an abandoned spaceship seemingly infested by a terrifying creature. He finds the lonely survivor of the crew and they begrudgingly start to work together to contact help and survive. I am just going to say that I clicked for salex's name, I stayed for the stellar characterization, pining and top-tier bantering, and got overwhelmed by the tentacle sex. (/pos)

it takes two by lumensd (E) | 3rd sem | akeshu | two-shots By all means, this series has some things I usually am not interested in (phone sex, degradation) but Jay is so skilled and his akeshus are so fucked in the head that now I've signed up for the masochist Joker agenda. Hurray!

i dream of you draped in wires by rime (E) | 3rd sem | akeshu | one shot "Maruki's Shadows don't want to fight; they just want to collect data. Wait, are those cat ears?" You would think a work with the tag "catboy shibari gunplay fuckordie" can't be too serious. Wrong! Excellent character study attack 🔪🔪🔪 (from the same author there's also this P5 vanilla fic that is excellent)

Darken my doorway by EnlacingLines (E) | 3rd sem-post canon | akeshu | one shot ""I don’t need to test my theory. You should be thanking me, really. Opening this door for you.” “A door to what?” Akira says, exasperated by just how self congratulatory Goro still sounds.“ Submission.” Or: I am a firm switch shuake shipper, I don't vibe with too-extreme dynamics *proceeds to go ballistics over this fic regardless*, *awakens to the wonder of d/s a lil fucked up dynamics*

[meruz]

hi im putting all my asks in one post again. these are from like the past month and a half approx? some digimon thoughts some tmnt thoughts some art musings u know the usual

@waywardistics YAYY thank you so much for ordering! I'm glad it got to you & that you are enjoying it!

this is kind of a missive to everyone who ordered but: I am very nervous about pre-orders whenever I do them... nervous that not very many people will order, nervous that there will be supply chain or production dilemmas and I won't be able to get copies out to people in a timely fashion, nervous about having people's money but having an indeterminate amt of time where i have not yet "held up my part of the bargain" etc etc SO. THANK U GUYS...FOR ORDERING and being patient and im so glad it got to y'all

@seanonthemoon (idk why i cant tag u BUT) interesting... i gotta be honest I don't think abt the crests that much. i agree that they're very much like heres the "girl" crest heres the "nerd boy" crest etc to the point that it becomes almost meaningless. but i think what makes them even more meaningless to me, and is probably the reason they kind of designated girl/boy crests etc is that i think like the digivices they're toys and merchandise more than they are actual narrative tools LOL. I wouldve loved something with cody and mimi! theyre both so deeply empathetic and sensitive.. theres a lot they share but i think because they look so different on the surface it would make it difficult to market that merch...booo capitalism boooo toy marketing its all sexist bullshit at least here in the u.s. idk if japan is that different though.

I'm actually a little frustrated with how often 02 and 02 related media squanders cody in general lol. he feels like a parallel of izzy, joe, and TK(season 1 tk) while also being kind of none of those and suffering through lackluster characterization as a result... and then once ken joins the team it feels a little redundant. there's a couple cody-centric eps of 02 I remember really liking but then i think abt how he's been used since in like post-series content and 02:the beginning where they made him type on the computer even though obviously that's yoleis thing but because he had nothing else to do and aghh... my blood boils. i feel like the youngest but most serious anime achetype even at its bare bones is actually rly interesting idk why they don't play it up. UM. Once again my opinion is that he should be taller LOL and maybe they should play up his kendo martial arts honorable training stuff more idk. tallest + youngest + most serious just seems like a recipe for success for me. well. theres still time. and theres always fanfic.

THIS IS SO NICE TO SAY and not the first time someone has said it but i appreciate it everytime because i really admire the mm art style so much. It's like part of why I got really into the movie because I really recognized my own artistic sensibilities and aspirations in the way they stylized everything.

UM And i feel like since watching the movie and looking at all the concept art and making my own art i do feel like its only become more obvious how much my own art is lacking LOL LIKE when you see something that feels so similar I think the differences only become more stark. those artists are definitely on a different level than me. But it's nice to hear people say it doesn't look so different from their pov. thank u ^^

thank u!!!!!!! i love mundanity and naturalism... there's something so beautiful abt it to me lol... I feel like my anatomy needs work actually but ive been feeling better abt it this year so it's good to hear! thank you!

DLKGDSGDLALSNDF WAS IT TOO FAR..?? firstly, yeah I was thinking late teen/young adult ages for both of them ie 18-19ish, definitely not the age the kids are in the movie lol.

but also they arent DOING anything in that pic it is literally just a confrontation + some innuendo... I think teens should be allowed some less than subtle innuendo.. its like one of the top 3 classically teen pastimes...

this is such a funny ask to get because i feel like i haven't been able to do thin lineart until like. this past year or two maybe LOL. UM having a line-centric art job helped I think. I started on craig of the creek back in 2022 and thats a show where we spend a lot of time inking so I had a job where I was constantly moderating my line weight 40 hours a week every week for over a year. disappointingly, much of improvement is simply horrendous amounts of practice.

Here's a tip though: I think a lot of thin lineart boils down to confidence. I think instinctively we read thick, bold, fast lines as confident but theres actually a lot of obscuring you can do with a thick line. if you're not sure whether the nose on the face or a browline should be a little more left or a little more down you can hide that with a thick line and pretend its a shadow. or hide it with a bunch of quick lines and the eye can kind of approximate where looks best among the mass.. whereas a thin line is rly singular and stark and hides nothing, it needs to be precise. so anytime i know i want thin lineart i spend a LOT of time sketching, making sure i know exactly where i want my lines to go. so im not second guessing by the time im inking...

ok thats kind of a broad tip lol... here's one thats more applicable: IF POSSIBLE, lower your pressure sensitivity on your device. most devices have some way to edit your pressure sensitivity curve. I use a surface pro at home and this is what my pressure curve looks like most of the time.

When I work on a wacom it looks even more like a reverse L shape LOL. I'm naturally a really heavy-handed artist and I use a "light" or "hard" pressure curve to compensate for how hard I'm always pressing on the pen lol. if you're like me and you struggle with going too hard with the ink too fast... this will probably help a lot!

SFHASLDFH I LOVE THIS ASK this is like the type of question a person gets asked when chalk drawing on the sidewalk at recess LOL. but i understand because I've been struggling also for like. months. I think I'm finally starting to nail it down though so here's some of my observations.

[feel free to save this img but **please do not re-post it or share broadly**. my biggest fear in the world is to spend 30 min on some notes and become a widely proliferated art tutorial im not even kidding. i made it low contrast and difficult to read on purpose.]

my other tip is to just look at and study a lot of reference because that's all ive been doing. the tmnt are really cartoony so its difficult to use like actual anatomical reference unless ur going for that look BUT theres been so many adaptions in so many different styles that there's a real treasure trove of stuff to look at for how to simplify, stylize, and dissect these characters while keeping the recognizable essence. so theres lots to pull from.

If you want to expand further, it's also good to have 5) something sci-fi 6)something fantasy 7)something mundane/slice of life. a bedroom is a really good go-to. And of course some bgs can be two or more of these things at once.

I've definitely answered asks abt bg tips before but here's one specifically for if you want to do bg design for a job:

Your portfolio should probably have at least one of each of the following 1) an interior 2) an exterior 3) a cityscape 4) a nature scene. Just to cover kind of the basics of what you'd be asked to draw on any given project.

I actually feel like I don't have that many cityscrapes in my portfolio... this is something I'm gonna try to work on in the coming year LOL. OH ALSO. This is a very basic tip and people will tell you it all the time but its worth repeating: look up portfolio websites of artists who have the job you want. An easy way to do this is to go onto imdb for any cartoon or movie you like and to find the names listed as "bg/background designer" or whatever then just google that name +"art" or "animation" most artists have some public facing internet presence so it's not hard. spend time studying their work and hold those images in your head! it's a good way to get a good idea of what "industry standard" looks like and comparing ur own art to it... I know people sometimes get bummed comparing their art to others but if you can keep your head up lol.. it'll help you figure out what you need to work on!

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ok thats all i have to say sorry for typing so much. happy new year everybody who read this far LMAO!!!!!

[crguang]

Hi, I've been reading your fanfics lately and I've become obsessed with your writing! I'm not good at English so I keep to myself.

I wanted to share my feelings, because I think you should know what a great job you do! Not only did you make me have a different perspective on Kafka, you also made me see character development more clearly! (I also write a lot, and it's one of my difficulties.)

It's incredible how his stories gave me an addictive feeling, something I haven't seen in any other Kafka fanfic! Please keep it up!

In fact, I have ideas in my head about how Kafka would react to R's death? Or what exactly would make her cry? I wonder, and I think your point of view would be quite accurate.

first of all, don’t worry about your english!! it’s great, and it’s not my first language either so i understand the struggle. thank you for your kind words i cant believe my writing has inspired/helped you in any way, im especially happy it changed your mind about Kafka hehe. trust meee i understand how tough characterization is, i focus way too much on the details and it can get pretty frustrating. i take it seriously too, so when something doesn’t go my way or i can’t portray a scene the way i see it in my mind, i lose it a little bit.

ouhhh, kafka and death is a pretty intimate affair in my opinion. she deals with it all the time but we don’t know if she’s experienced it— she sees suffering as something euphoric, fascinating. we know she doesn’t care for her victims because of it, that and the fact that she’s following what she truly believes is destiny. if it was their destiny to die by her hand, why would she mourn? i think it would take a lot to make her cry, she’s very resilient and can withstand a lot + she doesn’t feel fear and there are lots of complex emotions born from it (anxiety, dread, panic) so in my opinion she’s not very attuned to these as well. i’ll expand on the “not feeling fear” thing because its absolutely insane; its a primal instinct that makes us do or not do so many things. it’s connected to so many other emotions— we feel sad because we fear losing people, we feel helpless because we fear not being good enough, etc. kafka wouldn’t be able to understand all of that in a visceral way. we know she worries to an extent (for the trailblazer, for blade) and that also stems from fear but so far, it’s been somewhat superficial. she checks up on them like once and that’s that. here again, following and believing in a scripted future makes it so that she doesnt have much to worry about. it makes me believe that she would often realize things after they’ve happened, like “oh, i don’t like this…”

losing someone she genuinely cares about might paralyze her, at least at first. death doesn’t obsess her because fear is self-preservation and she cant feel that. she is logical though, and knows not to put herself/others in certain dangerous situations. she doesn’t fear her s/o dying, she just knows she doesn’t want it to happen. what she can feel though is sadness, and that only happens during/after the fact. grief is soo complex, that’s why i think it would paralyze her afterwards— she’d feel this immense loss that she hasn’t prepared for, and kafka is rarely caught by surprise. she wouldn’t know what to do and her logic won’t save her; so many things don’t matter when you’re dealing with emotions that feel all-consuming, she knows death is inevitable, so what? she knows this was always a possibility, so what? that doesn’t tell her how to deal with it. she’d go through the motions as usual because life didn’t stop for her but she’d have this constant tightness in her chest like fingers curled around her heart. the tears would find her on a tuesday morning as she’s cleaning her gun or putting on her boots. to me, her feelings have a little lag; she doesn’t feel apprehension much so they would have to hit her afterwards. in my most recent fic im writing about her being a player for laughs but i still make her fall for the reader at the same time they fall for her, she just realizes it way later. this is long as hell im so sorry but to sum up i do think she would cry a lot because she almost never does and her body would need the relief.

im yapping im sorry😭 your question was super interesting and it really got me thinking but let me stop lmfao. i hope i kinda answered it along the way😭

[sassyandclassy94]

10 Questions for 10 Writers

Thank you SO much for the tag, @coneygoil !! You have no idea how much I love being included in these things🫶🏻

1. Is writing a hobby or a way of life?

Sadly, it’s just a hobby. My life’s kinda too busy to make it a lifestyle

2. A journal full of notes, or a clean completed manuscript?

A clean completed manuscript, thank you very much. Which is pretty ironic, given I’m a pretty chaotic woman.

3. Who (or what) is your writing inspiration?

SwanFire and ThePhoenixFeatherQuill. I went through a Once Upon a Time phase became a huge SwanFire shipper after my first rewatch and one night while I was lying in bed, I looked up SwanFire fanfics. The Phoenix’s masterlist was like, the first or second search result? So I clicked on it when lo and behold! The Spinner’s Son captured my interest. I clicked on it and fell in love. I looked for other medieval AUs but couldn’t find any so naturally, after seeing posts about writing what you went to read, I decided to try my own hand at writing one.

4. Which is worse: Someone you ‘idolize’ reading your first draft or listening to you sing?

Well… I’m not a singer (I sing WITH people sometimes) so, definitely having someone I look up to read my first draft. I remember when Red (an awesome writer who I also look up to and tumblr friend - check out his Into the Woods, it’s amazing!!) told me he checked out Secrets, Lies and Blessings after we met and started interacting during covid. I was mortified and wanted to crawl into a hole.

5. Has writing from someone else’s POV changed your perspective?

Um, maybe….? I delved into OC stuff this year and wrote a fic about Gale Cleven. Two people with totally different personalities and characterization than Baelfire and Emma so, I guess yes? Maybe it didn’t change my perspective but it’s helped me grow as a writer maybe? I don’t know, maybe I don’t understand this question…?

6. Tumblr, AO3, LiveJournal, or FFN?

AO3 and FFN by far!! They’re my favorites and go-tos. I started out on those babies! I think FFN is slowly dying though😔

7. AO3 word count? And are you satisfied with it?

105,744 - No, I wish it was higher. If it was it’d mean I’m more prolific.

8. What movie/book gripped you irrevocably?

Once Upon a Time started my writing hobby. I needed Neal to be happy and I was gonna write that, darn it! But with running out of ideas, writing SwanFire for 6 years straight, and going through a kind of heartbreak, I got really burnt out and kinda stopped for a while. It was The Boys in the Boat and Masters of the Air that inspired me to start writing again❤️ Don and Gale, man! They have a hold on me!!

9. What’s the highest compliment you could ever be given, and have you been given it?

That my writing is better than I give it credit for. And yes, Red told me that four years ago. He said it more articulate than that though (former English teacher and all, lol!) and him saying that made me feel a little more confident in my writing. I’ve gotten some pretty nice compliments about keeping my characters’ personalities true to canon and that’s pretty high praise too because I go real out of my way to do that.

10. What defines your writing style?

I… don’t even know? Even though most of my stories are romance, there’s also a heavy emphasis on friendship because a good old fashioned friendship is important to me (e.g. Emma and Eleanor). Theyre also very emotional. Whether it’s someone falling in love, preparing for parenthood, or suffering from PTSD, I want my readers to feel what he/she is going through and to be able to relate to them on a personal and intimate level.

Tags: Not me racking my brain to think of all the writers who follow and/or engage with me, and/or are in my notes🤕 @phoenixwrites @ljf613 @solo-pitstop-vibes @okieedokes @swanfireprincessmydear @fictional-at-heart @redbone135 @heatherfield @strangethings-everywhere @plasmabluefire @themeepyfreak And whatever other writer sees this and wants to participate, please consider yourself tagged! You can even say I tagged you. I want you all, especially new writers, to be included🫶🏻 No cliques in SassyAndClassy’s house!!! Oh my gosh is that ten??? DID I DO IT???? We won’t talk about how long that took me to come up with all of you🥴 I hope none of you will be annoyed that I tagged you🫣

[that-wildwolf]

how does fanon get Shakarian wrong? 👀👀

*inhales*

I'm gonna start off by saying that I'm a turianfucker too and turians are hot and I get the thirst I get y'all

BUT

too many people are attracted to turians and want a turian romance so badly that they ignore Garrus's entire character for the sake of getting a turian romance and just basically strip him down to nothing but his species. People who are into turians and have a primal kink or something, which like. I also get I'm a monsterfucker too that's fun. are also projecting too much of that kink onto turians and Garrus specifically because Garrus is just unlucky enough to be the romance option. People write a generic alien/human relationship while ignoring most of what the Shakarian dynamic looks like in canon because. Well I actually don't know why. But the amount of turian/human fics, and yes, Shakarian too, that include some kind of "turians are a bit feral or actually aggressive/possessive" take is terrifying. Have we played the same games? Turians are literally described over and over as uptight having a stick in their ass sticklers for the rules. Garrus is an awkward nerd who doesn't know how to flirt with his girlfriend. Even when he he does the evil he does it in the most rule-obedient way possible. He's a mess and he relies on Shepard a bit too much especially in the first two games. This man is NOT the growly dominant alien character insert you want him to be I'm sorry. Turians have 15,000 more years of civilisation than humans. They are not going to be feral creatures just because they have sharper teeth. The human would be the primitive uncivilised alien in a turian/human relationship if you need someone to fill that role (also, why would you?).

Not to mention Shepard being treated as a self-insert which is. well it is a lot more forgivable in my eyes, but even as an RPG PC, Shepard still has a lot of distinct character. I think this is the first time since playing The Walking Dead that I've seen a player character with such a strong personality despite the genre forcing her to be different things.

To be fair I think a lot of the problems with fanon characterization of not only Shakarian but pretty much everyone who gets commonly mischaracterized (look at the woobification of Tali) could be fixed by regularly checking back in with the source material instead of, which I understand and can also be guilty of sometimes, immersing yourself in more and more layers of fanfic until you can't tell apart the fanon Shakarian from the canon Shakarian.

Dishonourable mentions (things that aren't common bad fandom practice but bother me personally): sub Shepard and actually worse yet dom Garrus, any AU where Garrus is a human (like??? lmao. his entire personality and conflict is driven by him being a turian, that is so central to his character that I can't imagine why you would take that away and think that's the same person), Shakarian retiring to the beach (Garrus said tropical. He didn't say beach. He hates swimming he would drown save him)

Also obviously this should go without saying, but there are TONS of great fanfics about Shakarian out there. This is just a list of what people get wrong that I wrote in like ten minutes on my phone sitting on the floor in my kitchen. It's not some magic truth scroll of fandom transgressions. Also obviously everyone is free to interpret fictional characters however they want even if it's different from the source material. Sometimes ignoring canon is better, trust me. Do whatever you want and don't let me spoil your fandom experience for you.

But yeah

TL;DR: I think that Shakarian and Garrus in particular suffers a lot from Garrus being the only turian romance in the games.

[beevean]

The main ships of NFCV:

DraculaXLisa: The science couple! Bonding over their shared love of science and nothing else. For someone who seemed deathly afraid of what her husband could do to humanity Lisa really didn't seem to have any issues with him commiting genocide in the end! Gotta love having to twist characterizations to keep a ship alive!

Trephacard: Superficially it's the most obvious, but the group goes a surprisingly long time separated and the time they spend together is often spent being cunts to each other

Striga and Morana : lesbianrepresentation.png

Alucard x Greta: When a cunt meets a piece of wood

Lenector: https://youtu.be/UnDhyWnHPD0?si=AcoJZBVXlYlByHgL

Annette X Richter: That great moment when one member of the couple gets treated nicely by the other when they suffer from trauma, while the other treats them like shit for the same reason, only to basically lie about it later on by saying "Oh I was worried about you". Also dead moms are a great bonding agent!

^ you couldn't have made a better analysis, my friend.

If you count Strirana (Morga?), then you might as well count Olrox/Mizrak, which is a very nice combination of fanservice (look! two hot men fucking!) and angst (oh nooo Olrox turned his bf but he says he doesn't want to do the same with his new bf because he doesn't care but he clearly does, oh the drama!) :P

Anyway, the straight ships in these show all suck. The gay ships are too busy being gay to go beyond that, but the others are all built on the same dynamic of "sassy woman keeps his stupid/rude man in check and they have cute sassy banters that are supposed to mimic chemistry" - and I would count St. Germain with his woman too if the latter had any sort of personality.

It was cute when Lisa sassed Dracula because, well, he's Dracula, although she really looks bad afterwards with how she neglects her son in favor of her monster of a hubby (not to mention she just comes off as an arrogant ass, since her love for science comes in the form of wanting to be seen as smarter than the peasants below her). Sypha insulting Trevor loses its charm very quickly, even when they're supposed to be cutesy together - and she has no right of calling Trevor rude when she can be even nastier and meaner. Greta appears out of nowhere in the end and she believes she can order and sass Alucard around like a common fanfic OC, not to mention making a tasteless joke out of his experiences in S3. And the "banter" between Lenore and Hector is sick from multiple angles, but on a lighter note is also forced as fuck - they sound OOC, there's no other way of putting it, because the only way they know of showing a man and a woman getting along is shit like this.

When you think about it, the only people genuinely in love really are Striga and Morana, because they were designed to be joined at the hip.

Well, I suppose Annette doesn't really fit the mold. She doesn't sass Richter: she sounds like she genuinely looks down on him and thinks lowly of him, until the writing has to force a "cute" ship tease between them because despite having absolutely nothing in common with game Annette and being a very obvious example of "this character sucks, we'll improve her and make her super cool", she couldn't be her own character, oh no she's still named Annette and therefore she's bound to become Richter's GF :) "I knew you'd be back. I was more concerned than I wanted to be." you are a horrible liar

anyway the only way you can enjoy ships in this show is ignoring canon and forcing the characters into your favorite prepackaged molds, like Trevor being the funny penis man, Sypha being the braincell holder and Alucard being the snarky broody asshole. Or ignoring all the abuse and rape for the sake of kinky hot sex in the case of Lenector :P

[gamebird]

Murderathin Rec List

As compiled by the denizens of the New Tideland MB/G channel! The greatest hits of TMBD's most popular frenemy ship - the fics that got us into it, and the fics we made because of it. "PR" are quotes from us as we talked back and forth about what was awesome about the fic, or from AO3 comments. All works are complete except Enemies, Closer.

The Long Emergency by murderbot Words: 56,866 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: Trapped on the survey planet when the last emergency beacon fails, Murderbot and the PreservationAux team scramble to survive deadly fauna, cruel weather, scarce resources, and GrayCris's armed hunting parties. In a grueling ordeal spanning two planetary years, Murderbot becomes closer to its humans than it ever thought possible. PR: “the absolute ur-Murderathin fic”, “an absolute stunner”, “that’s the one that got me into the ship”, "This fic is amazing! Murderbot's voice and everyone's characterizations were so on-point, and all of the details of their survival on this planet and the action scenes were so well-fleshed out.", "The first MB/G fic on AO3!"

Recollection by murderbot Words: 30,753 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: SecUnit and Gurathin agree to be married, temporarily, for ease of travel during an assignment. After a violent encounter and a bad wormhole jump, they crash land on a habitable planet and discover their entire ship is suffering from amnesia. Nobody remembers anything from their past. The ship's records are badly scrambled. The planet is too far for anyone to reach safely. When Gurathin and SecUnit find the record that indicates they are married, they build a life together as marital partners, not knowing their union is based on a lie. PR: “I love pain”, “It absolutely broke me”, “still haunts me”, “wonderful”, " I'm so full of bittersweet emotions", "I was this close to crying for a few chapters, and the ending was perfect."

Enemies, Closer by Abacura, Gamebird, IHopedTheredBeStars, opalescent_potato, Rosewind2007, theAsh0 Words: 104,478 (WIP) Rating: Teen and Up Summary: When a Combat SecUnit with identical genetics to Murderbot is sent to Preservation Station to commit a massacre, the delicate balance between Murderbot, ART, and Dr. Gurathin shifts, putting all four of them on a collision course. PR: “a wonder and a delight”, “my favorite one”, "Rock-Paper-Scissors dom dynamics in which ART is the secret fourth option, Dynamite", "Can't wait for more!", "A monumental collaboration!"

Boots by opalescent_potato Words: 5,762 Rating: General Audiences Summary: Murderbot learns a little more than it wanted to about Gurathin's mysterious past. PR: “such a great, quiet study in emotional intimacy and shared trauma. Also has an absolutely amazing Oh. Oh no moment.”, "this feels like the realest depiction of poverty trauma I've ever seen in fanfic", "Info dumping as a love language. Learning self care from the most particular human."

Boots by gnomeskillet Words: 2,797 Rating: General Audiences Summary: "I'm going to fix your boots," he explained, talking to me like I was a small human child that didn't know anything. At least he kept his eyes on the floor while he did it. "They're a mess and if you want them to last longer, then you need to take care of them." PR: “this entire fic got me", "Omg who knew shoe shines could be so full of tension??", "This was sort of in kink no man's land, in between the barbed wire embankments of desire and fulfillment."

No Peace/No Rest by IHopedTheredBeStars Words: 4,363 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: Though Dr Gurathin eventually accepts the addition of SecUnit a.k.a. Murderbot to PreservationAux, and even assists in its recovery & rehabilitation after the corporate gunship debacle, he never warms up to it like the others do—at least according to our unreliable narrator, Murderbot itself! Let’s assume Murderbot is right this time. So what’s up with that?? This story takes place (chronologically) after Fugitive Telemetry and just before Network Effect. PR: “an excellent MB&G fic”, "So many fantastic ideas in here", "This is such a great look at grappling with the guilt of having taken a life, and being stripped of that comforting denial that it wasn't a person."

Mutually Trusted Network Affiliates by Gamebird Words: 16,517 Rating: Explicit Summary: Murderbot finds itself in a dilemma. It has discovered Gurathin likes it and decides it has to do something about this. This one's for the shippers. PR: “a cornerstone Murderathin fic, but it low-key requires reading pretty much the entirety of the Gamebird cinematic universe”, "MB a chapter ago: Ew, no! We didn't have sex! MB now, gazing derisively at Gurathin's sex toy suggestions: What is this shit? Are we fucking or are we fucking?", "using these characters to explore alternate modes of sexuality and explore what intimacy means, as itself, when divorced from the usual biological drives and cultural frameworks is brilliant"

Gurathin’s Side of the Story by Gamebird Words: 51,849 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: A retelling of The Murderbot Diaries from Gurathin's point of view. PR: “An incredible character study that adds so much depth to Gurathin. The reader falls in love with him every step of the way (and Murderbot does too)”, "There are so many moments where this story just drop-kicks me with how real it is.", "a lovely view into Gurathin‘s CR background, augments, and his soft belly under that armadillo shell."

It Was Only A Kiss by Gnomeskillet Words: 2,102 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: Frustrated and desperate, Murderbot hauls Gurathin into an alleyway and makes out with him in order to avoid Station Security. Hey, it has a 100% success rate in media! PR: “excellent”, “Incredibly sexy and very sweet.”, "Dom Murderbot absolutely wrecking Gurathin while not really knowing what the hell it's doing is my favorite flavor"

Pressing Down On Me, Pressing Down On You by Gnomeskillet Words: 1,061 Rating: Not Rated Summary: I was just thinking about MB pressing down on Gurathin's augments like how ART presses down on MB in the feed, and I like thinking about MB being tsundere about taking care of its least favorite augmented human. It doesn't LIKE Gurathin, he's just less annoying this way. PR: “ahhh yes this one was absolutely one of the ones that made me go OHHHH. It made me so invested in their relationship”, "Poor Gurathin doesn't know what he's getting into, good thing Murderbot is so nice XD", "I love the idea of cuddling in the feed."

Just to Suffer the Pressure by Chyoatas Words: 2,113 Rating: Explicit Summary: He was already out of breath when he let his hand press to his throat. (That hadn’t been in the original plan. This was already too close- too fraught. It was already embarrassing enough (and hotter for it, but he wouldn’t admit it.)) PR: “Okay we were all thinking it. There are not nearly enough fics where Murderbot erotically asphyxiates Gurathin.”, "this is insanely good holy shit", "unhinged screaming I can't form words, this is everything I want it to be"

Murderathin NSFW Zine Comic by Chyoatas Words: 1,069 Rating: Explicit Summary: My NSFW comic from the Murderbot Diaries NSFW Zine! Alternative text description of the comic is embedded in the images. PR: "So hot!", "sweet, naughty, and snarky", "So much thought went into this. The closer I look, the more details pop out at me!"

Purr by Rosewind2007 Words: 3,448 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: I saw a post by someone saying: “Wouldn’t it be nice if humans could just purr, like cats. You could let people know you were happy without talking about your feelings or anything...” And I thought: it’d be nice if Murderbot could purr. So, here you are. PR: “Ah yes, my favorite trope. Murderbot purring when it's happy!”, "MB your friends care about you!", "This was adorable and I loved it"

Sex Pollen by Rosewind2007 Words: 7,240 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: Atypical human and para-human courtship behaviors and coitus triggered by xeno-floral microgameteophytes Abstract: Twenty four (24) subjects were exposed to xeno-floral microgameteophytes (XFM). Atypical behaviors were recorded by all but two (2). PR: “the yearning”, “I love watching Murderbot and Gurathin dance around each other in this. Both trying so hard to be normal and just internally yearning to be close to each other. The longing is so palpable!”

Bundling by Rosewind2007 Words: 18,348 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: It was a stupid accident. We’d identified the presence of space debris in this sector, including pieces large enough to deflect the course of a small transport; but my Risk Assessment Module was happily burbling in the low teens (it really needs replacing, but I’m quite fond of its optimism now) and ART had calculated the risk of an actual collision as approximately 1 in 159,753. But of course we were that one. And of course the client I was with would be that one.  PR: "And thereby, Murderbot, SecUnit, discovered it loved itself.", " A wonderful story", "That last line is just so perfect"

The Corporate and the Construct by beeayy Words: 87,919 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: Bots and constructs have taken over the Corporate Rim. When PreservationAux is captured sneaking into AI-controlled space, someone must stay behind with the sophisticated bot-pilot that remembers a lot less than it thinks it does, and the rogue SecUnit with more anxiety and depression than anyone knows. PR: “my favorite AU”, “fantastic”, “An amazing AU. Great marriage of Fairy Tale elements with Robot Overlords.”, "This fic was such an amazing ride", "I had emotions and cried at the last chapter. Good job!"

I Hate The Way I Don’t Hate You by beeayy Words: 53,345 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: Murderbot hates Gurathin, though the reason changes on a daily basis. PR: "I love this whole thing", "These two ridiculous assholes *always* end up meeting in the middle", "I love fake marriage fics  especially when it's enemies to lovers."

Maintenance Protocol by Abacura Words: 5,762 Rating: Explicit Summary: I’m worried about SecUnit. This isn’t the first time I’ve caught it making a face that looks like it's in pain. I worry that it isn’t taking care of itself, that without a cubicle, it needs maintenance that it isn’t telling us about. I wish it would tell me. I wish it would let me take care of it. I could take such good care of it. PR: “smoking hot, I wholeheartedly recommend”, "The maintenance was so perfect and then it was done and I figured so was the fic but holy fuck (literally)", "This is the good stuff. This is perfect."

Fuckboy Strategy by The_Onion Words: 6,203 Rating: Not Rated Summary: 'Can you know you don’t like something without trying it?' I'd texted Ratthi. He responded, 'Sure! But trying things out is always a good idea :D' which I am sure he would not have said if he’d known what I was talking about. // Murderbot explores idioms, the ethics of ghosting, and its own sexuality. PR: “Ah yes, my favorite trope. Murderbot being an absolute bull in the china shop of Gurathin’s heart.”, "so good and so funny i am beside myself", "made me laugh out loud"

Construct, Social by kiwisson Words: 1,852 Rating: General Audiences Summary: Late-night human behavior discussions with your favorite deadly weapon. PR: “the vibes are really good”, “Perfect tag is perfect: You Jerks Talk A Lot For People Who Hate Each Other”, “a fascinating example of the first tagged MB&G which shows many themes already emerging!”

Imperfect Reactions by xianvar Words: 1,324 Rating: Teen and Up Summary: It’s a normal evening with friends – easy laughter, Bharadwaj stopping by to chat, Gurathin and Murderbot sniping at each other, Murderbot letting Gurathin tease it… wait, what? PR: “exterior POVs are always SO good”, "there's so many little characterizations in this fic and its really delightful!", "Adorable!"

[i-am-bella-donna]

To Remain in the Sky

AO3

Story Summary:

Emily loved being an angel. However, it took her a long time to realize that “being an angel” and “being good” were far from the same thing.

Pairings: Familial Emily x Sera

Word Count: 1,727

CONTENT WARNINGS: N/A

A/N: I wrote this on a whim. I want to see how many HH fanfics I write before the next two episodes come out.

Because we know so little about Emily and Sera, I did my best with their characterizations. I hope you like it.

~~~

“How long?”

If Sera was surprised to see Emily appear in her bedroom, she did not show it. She had most likely been expecting her—Sera always seemed to know exactly what Emily was thinking, just like Emily always knew what Sera was thinking. They were two peas in a pod, and Emily admired her older sister like she had hung the stars.

She and Sera never kept secrets. Not from each other.

Or so she had thought.

Emily took a deep breath, the unfamiliar sensation of anger overwhelming in her chest. “How long has Heaven been doing this, Sera?”

Sera turned away from the wall mirror, watching in silence as Emily approached. Her expression was unreadable.

“How long ago did you give Adam permission to take our people down to Hell for—” Her voice caught and broke off. She heaved another breath.

Humans died. That was a fact.

But the dead were not supposed to die again.

Emily struggled to keep her own expression neutral, even as her fingers twitched. How much double-death had occurred down in Hell—a cruel fate not even caused by the Sinners themselves, but by her own people?

How did I not know?

“Emily…”

She snapped back to attention.

Sera was watching her with furrowed brows, concern plain in her expression. She opened her arms, and Emily wanted nothing more than to fall into them. To let herself be fussed over like she was a small child again. No matter what was wrong, her older sister had always made everything better.

But Emily was no longer a child, and Sera could no longer placate her with hugs and sweet words.

Shoving the hands away, Emily tried her hardest to ignore the hurt that flashed across her face. “How many human souls have been destroyed because of us?” she exclaimed. The words scraped against her throat as they left, leaving a barely-recognizable metallic taste in her mouth.

In all her years, Emily had rarely seen blood. She had no reason to—blood and injury were rare in Heaven. But what about Charlie? Had her estranged cousin grown up surrounded by the slaughter of her own people? Did she ever have to fall asleep to a lullaby of screams as angels led a massacre all around her? Did the streets flood with red? Did—

“You don’t understand,” Sera began softly. Emily pushed the vivid images out of her mind as quickly as possible. She wanted to focus on this conversation and get answers, but Sera looked so tired and sad—

I bet the Sinners we kill are sad, too.

Fury and betrayal filled her once more.

“What is there to understand?” Emily shot back, cutting her sister off to both of their surprise. She knew she should stop. She should take a few deep breaths so they could talk like reasonable adults—but the emotions swirling around her head and clouding her mind were suffocating in a way she had never felt before. She was left choking on her own thoughts and wanting to throw back her head and scream—not with excitement or laughter, but with confusion and pain.

If every day in Heaven was happy, did every day in Hell feel like this?

If Sinners were already suffering, why did they need to be killed?

Emily could not understand, but the questions were filling her with bitterness.

“Charlie showed us!” she pleaded. “The human souls in Hell—they can be good! That man in the feed from Hell—Angel—he was becoming better! And his friends were getting better, too! They just need some help.”

She and Sera—they were leaders of Heaven. They were supposed to be merciful. They should have been the ones going down to Hell, offering redemption to Sinners who wanted to work for a second chance. Charlie should never have had to claw her way up and beg for an audience—especially not with the way it turned out.

Sera was her older sister. She was an angel, and Emily wanted to believe that she was a good one.

But as chaos and discord unfolded in that courtroom, she had looked at her estranged cousin and seen the kindest soul she had ever met—only to watch that spark get crushed at the hands of Sera and Adam.

As if reading her mind, Sera continued. “The situation is so much more complicated than you could ever know.” Her voice was still gentle. Before, Emily might have found it calming. Right now, it only made her angrier.

“So what?” Emily took another step back and glared up at her sister. “I’m supposed to do nothing? Ignore how our people have been committing annual genocides?”

Emily tried to shove away the images that Adam had accidentally displayed—the screams and blood and fear.

Did it really matter if they were Sinners? The fear in their eyes was human, first and foremost.

How many times had Charlie and Vaggie had that fear in their eyes? What about their beloved friends from the Hotel?

Her heart almost stopped.

The Hotel.

Her stomach twisted as the blood drained from her face. Lightheaded, she stumbled back, barely noticing as Sera extended a worried hand.

“You’re going to stop the next Extermination, right?” she asked desperately. Her vision blurred slightly, but she did not care to understand why.

Sera winced. Pain, shame, guilt—they were all written clearly on her face.

Emily released a shuddering breath.

None of these emotions were supposed to be present on the face of her older sister. Sera was good, and wise, and—

And complicit in millions of deaths.

Sera looked away.

Emily felt her heart fall into her stomach. “Sera?” she asked weakly.

Sera blinked, and it was her turn to step away. She turned back to the wall mirror and stared at her reflection with dull eyes. When she spoke, her voice was heavy with exhaustion. “You’re still so young, Emily.”

“I’m older than any human on Earth—”

“But you aren’t even a millennium old yet!” Sera abruptly spun back to her, her expression pleading. Emily felt her own eyes grow wet in response.

Blood and death and screams and fear—

“There were thousands of years—thousands of catalysts—that built up to the first Extermination. Things were so much more complicated than you could imagine. Than I would even want you to imagine.” Sera started to reach for her, only to drop her hand. She looked as though she was in physical pain. “I never wanted to do this, Emily—but I had to do what was best for us. I had to keep our people safe.”

Sera took a shaky breath, turning away slightly before stepping forward once more. She kneeled and placed her hands gently on her shoulders. “Sometimes…” Her voice was softer than before. Resigned. “Sometimes, being a leader—even a leader of Heaven—means getting blood on your face so no one else has to.”

Emily swallowed. Her mouth was uncomfortably dry.

The Extermination was still going to happen. Adam had planned it—he was proud of it—and Charlie and Vaggie and all of their friends were going to be in danger again—

Her breaths were coming shorter and shorter. Her throat felt tight.

In some ways, Sera was right. Being a leader meant doing the tasks that no one else was willing to do—no matter the cost.

Her blood ran cold.

Sera was beginning to look worried at her lack of response. “Emily?”

Her heart pounded.

“Then…maybe I don’t want to be an angel of Heaven anymore.”

The words loomed in the air. They were out, and they could never be taken back.

Sera froze.

“Emily—”

“Those people—Charlie and her friends—everyone will need all the help they can get.” Emily heard her voice shaking as she spoke—it sounded strange to her own ears. She pressed on, smiling without any humor. “I love being an angel. I used to love watching you—I wanted to be exactly like you.”

Of course, Sera already knew that. Sera knew everything about her.

Her head spun with the memories. Had they really been so recent? This day might as well have lasted several years.

“I loved doing good. I tried to follow your example in any way possible—if I could be even a fraction as compassionate or kind as you were, I would be happy.” Her smile grew brittle. “But I want to keep people safe, too. I’ll do whatever it takes to help those who need it—even if that means walking straight into Hell.”

Sera yanked her hands away as though she had been burned. The terror on her face rivaled the fear in the eyes of Sinners as they were murdered—it was almost enough to make Emily falter.

Almost.

It hurt. It hurt more than Emily had even known was possible—she did not understand how she was not writhing in agony.

But the screams remained locked behind her lips and the smile stayed glued upon her face, and she kept silent as shaking hands reached above her head and snapped her halo in two.

~~~

Sera remembered the night that Lucifer Fell.

She had been there for all of it—from the buildup to the aftermath—and she wanted nothing more than to forget.

The scariest part of the Fall had been its namesake—the horrifying moment when the sacred ground of Heaven gave out and sent her once-best friend plummeting toward Hell. The horrifying moment when she locked eyes with Lucifer just in time to see his fear before he was disappearing through the floor.

She did not get to say goodbye, or to thank him, or to apologize. There was no time for any of it.

Sera had only seen one Fall, but that was more than enough. She was living proof that even Heaven could not keep the nightmares away.

And as her stupid, brave, caring little sister snapped her own halo, Sera watched as her worst nightmare became a reality. The halo had barely hit the ground before Emily was falling.

One second, she was present.

The next, she was gone.

And that was it.

The silence was deafening.

Two broken pieces of a halo—the only indication that Emily had been there at all—lay innocently on the floor. Thoroughly numb, Sera took the pieces into her palms. She could only stare as the jagged edges cut into her skin, smearing her hands with bright angelic blood.

Her head spun.

What have I done?

~~~

A/N: This was fun to write!

I thought that Emily must have been rather horrified to learn about the Exterminations. She spent her whole life in Heaven, where everything is perfect—only to find out that her people have been committing annual mass genocide for centuries.

In this story, I decided to use a slightly more sympathetic portrayal of Sera—she is still awful, but she genuinely believes that the Exterminations are for the best. Do I believe this interpretation will be canon? No. Is it fun to explore? Absolutely.

Also, I considered adding another couple of chapters (about Emily going down to Hell and meeting Charlie at the Hotel). Would anyone be interested in that?

[cursedvibes]

Can I ask your top 10 fav fics ever (from any fandom, if you don't mind)?

Also, just curious, is there a story behind your name "cursedvibes "?

I called myself "cursedvibes" because I thought that's the kind of impression the fics I want to write give off. My first beta reader @kaitakushi agreed (hehe) and so it was decided. As for fanfics, I'm not really gonna rank them but more list them by fandom...

JJK

Complicity by SenZen_Travers

Mahito/Kenjaku and my favourite fic of their ship. The characterization is really good and this might sound silly, but I'm glad Kenjaku is allowed to bottom here for once (very rare with Kenjaku ships in general unfortunately...)

King's Ascent by Acromos

Unfinished, but best Sukuna/Uraume fic I've ever read. Uraume is asexual and nonbinary. Love the world building and general prose here. Most of the chapters are focused on how the two grew up and they only really meet in the last one, but it's still incredibly good.

CSM

Well Prepared by Gay_as_fuck

Fic about Santa Claus and Tolka, his feelings for her and how she used him and gradually turned him into a weapon. There are only two fanfics about Santa Claus on AO3, but I'm glad this is one of them, it has exactly what I'm looking for. It's sweet, but also eerily creepy.

Houseki no Kuni

Shards of the Two of Us by undeadrabbit

Technically Kongo/Phos, but their love is platonic. Absolutely wonderful, kind of like someone wrote down all my thoughts about what happened between scenes or you got some additional canon material. Very heartbreaking to see them slowly drift apart and hurting themselves and each other despite still caring about the other.

Naruto

xenograft by Misfit_McCoward

AU where Sakura becomes Orochimaru's student while he's in Konoha and they do lots of experimentation together, on humans and animals alike. I like how Sakura slowly gets sucked in deeper in Orochimaru's machinations and loses any moral qualms she would otherwise have about the research they are doing, going so far as to compromise her own health for it. Just the sort of Mad Scientist story I like.

Be It Ever So Humble by Orochimartyr (ffnet)

A civilian enters one of Orochimaru's abandoned bases and inspects what has been left behind. I love stories that show the horror we are often familiar with in a story from the perspective from an outsider, especially if it involves the discovery of medical malpractice. There's a creeping sort of terror as we discover with this person what happened and piece together what horrible acts have been committed here. It actually really influenced my writing and was what I always aspired to write as well.

JJBA

can you tell that I like the Pillar Men?

I'll Follow You by Opus_Love

A Kars and Pillar Men origin story with Fix-It elements to it, since this is the 37th version of Kars we follow and this time he has the chance to make things right and not lose everything only to be cast into space. I especially love the slow development of Esidisi and Kars relationship and the little tidbits of information we get about the society they originated from.

We turn that old wheel round again by dratinigirl

AU where Kars lands on Earth again after being shot into space, but it's present day and Esidisi has been incarnated as a regular human, which gives Kars quite the culture shock. Very sweet, a bit angsty, but all ends well.

Youth, Man, and Father by dratinigirl

Another Pillar Men origin story. What can I say, I love the whole culture and society people come up with and I'm a sucker for EsiKars slowburn.

Monster

Five Roads Home by Lindra (ffnet)

Post-canon. Dieter and Johan bond over the child abuse they suffered and how it affects them even now. Johan is being cagey of course, but still more friendly than during canon events. It feels in-character though. Also found it nice to see Johan living as a woman now, but removed from the identity of "Anna".