#hi i sketched this like 2 months ago and forgot

[afraidparade]

[bowandbrush]

A sketch of the blue trio!!

An animatic idea I have for the maskface AU (that I have no time to actually start on 😭)

cowboy episode! Leo gets to hang out with some non-brother pals, and boy is it chaotic. (I’m gonna rant the general story below)

Mystic energy throughout the US is fluctuating and causing mini-earthquakes and vibrations that not only start momentarily irritating dogs/animals, but disrupt cloaking brooches and other mystic areas like nether realms, force fields, and invisibility cloaks. hueso’s hidden restaurant and passages to the hidden city are slowly being revealed, which is a huge problem.

The secondary story is with Frida, actually. being Big Mama’s daughter, she has since abandoned her high position in the Battle Nexus and as mama’s number two to be with her blood family.

In the first couple weeks of Venus temporarily living with the hamatos as a spy for Mama, Frida watches through a mystic orb longingly, observing the cold assistant Venus soften and learn what friendship, love and family is about. She grows to love the Mad Dogs with each day, and decides to flee from her life with Big Mama.

Unlike Venus (who’s still undercover, but losing her will to fulfill her mission and return to B.M.) she hated the spider for years behind a facade. Despite acting the most like Mama out of anyone, She was given enough freedom in her teen years to discover Big Mama didn’t mean anything she said.

now she’s showing her brothers and human sister on how to have a proper spa day. Raph is loving the his retirement from leadership.

Leo, Venus and Usagi portal just in time to where the source of the problem seems to be, Texas. With Donnie communicating through Leo’s wrist comm to help him navigate and uncover the issue. Leo’s portals now being nearly useless with the mystic quakes, this gives the trio the prefect excuse to dress like cowboys and wrangle some horses.

Leo is very sure of himself. He helped hueso charm a bird before, right? Wrong. The horse drags him about with the rope Leo tried throwing over its head. Much to his dismay. He loves ponies.

Venus approaches a different horse. She has this in the bag. Unlike Leo, who is a self-assured idiot. With a straight face, she’s got this handled. Also Wrong! Now there are two turtles being thrown around.

Usagi tries befriending a horse by sharing a love for carrots. Sure enough, they all love him. He’s just a natural animal charmer.

this whole adventure is really distracting Venus from her real mission established about 2 months ago. She doesn’t even want to go back to wearing 10 pounds of armor, being forced into things she doesn’t want to do or wear, and guarding empty hallways for days at a time.

And she forgot how much she hated Leo when she first knew him. Some arrogant, annoying reflection of what draxum really wanted in a super soldier that she couldn’t give to him as a yokai child. But now she couldn’t love Leo any more. It was making her sick.

later on, they discover an illegal oil rig operation going down, drilling into a mystic hotspot that is causing the whole ruckus. They use the power of friendship and stupidity to stop the bad guys and fix the mystic conundrum.

That’s basically the episode.

[mopiii]

I don't have an acceptable sketch for the 21st day of Aladariustober, actually October is already over and so is my challenge...

but I have something to show you)

these are my old/unfinished sketches and one that I hate, today is Halloween and what could be scarier for an artist than posting this

1. hand in hand day was ninth, but for me this sketch looked horrible, I come back to this idea at day twenty and see some progress (or better said, return to the skill I had two years ago, before my greatest art block)

2. meme in progress: draw me like one of your french girls

3. old aladarius in development, sketched them about three month ago, idk why I didn't draw pupils, looks scary, so it's perfect for Halloween

4. OMFG I forgot that I already sketched aladarius french kiss haha and cute flight together on Alador's stuff (Hi, Ratador!)

5. babygirl Darius and his cute flying head, later I will use this hairstyle for his old version

It was fun experience, thanks for support everyone :3

I continue to draw these two cuties, not so often, but still

maybe if I fix my graphics tablet I'll draw a comic about aladarius days in Hexide, a little about after Hexide and life after the epilogue I already have 150 pages of script, I'm serious!

[her-power]

The End of All Things (Part Four: e.m. x fem reader)

TRIGGER WARNING & C/W: 18++++ MDNI!!! Sweet! Eddie, hurt/comfort, grief, talk of grief, fluff, heavy drug use, suicidal thoughts, talk of death/dying, lots of crying, lots of swearing, some smut, unprotected p+v, trauma

Part One: Denial Part Two: Anger Part Three: Bargaining

Summary: Relationships are tested, choices are made, words hurt, and you might end up kicking Eddie Munson's ass. Full plot summary is on part one of this series.

Word Count: 8.6k

A/N: I also submitted an original sketch in this part. It's been years since I have drawn something so it's not great and I fucking forgot how hard it is to draw hands and draw a person lmao but I wanted to give you guys a little added bonus to this series.

A/N #2: This part was a bit rough for me to write, but also super healing in a way. I felt like I was looking into the eyes of all of my friends as I was writing this and just remembering things after so many years since losing my mom. Part Five will be released after the holidays, I need a bit of a break to be with my family and be prepared for the griefy feels. I love you all, thank you for giving me a platform to be creative and to heal. <3

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Eddie was pacing in the break room of the record store; inhaling deeply on his cigarette as he tried to gather his thoughts. The trip back home was uneventful, you had stayed at the Inn in Philadelphia for a night again. He had noticed a change in you after the cemetery. It was subtle changes; you would be unusually quiet, but then you would snap out of it and that big, beautiful smile he loved so much would appear. You were tired a lot; Eddie had noticed the bags under your eyes as the weeks went by. He knew you weren’t sleeping. Even when he would stay in the same bed as you, he knew you only pretended to be asleep. When you thought he was asleep, he would hear you rummage around in the kitchen, or go sit out on the porch, smoking a joint. 

Then it hit the two-month mark, and you were starting to terrify him. Summer was almost over, you had lost interest in things you loved to do, like painting, singing, reading. You would go to work, come home, stay awake, sleep, and then go to work again. 

Eddie would try to get you to talk to him, but you would shut down, blocking out anything and everything around you. 

He plops on the chair, his leg bobbing nervously, cigarette dangling out of his mouth. He stood up and started pacing again, he couldn’t sit. 

Eddie had called the realtor two weeks ago; she had a kind voice and gave him useful information and advice when it came to potentially buying a house. He was also curious why there weren’t any hits on the house, it had been on the market for a while and parts of it had been redone but no one was interested in buying it. She told him it was a mystery to her as well, there was nothing aesthetically wrong with the house, the foundation was perfect, the roof was brand new, but no one seemed to care for it. The owners had lowered their price five thousand dollars under the asking price, and there was still no jump. 

He had been saving money here and there for a couple years; he would call it his emergency fund. But when he had saw how you looked at your childhood home, how your eyes lit up with nostalgia and joy, he knew what he had to do. 

He was doing everything in his power to get enough money for the down payment on the house; he had mentioned the plan to your father. Eddie had thought he would think he was crazy, that neither one of you could afford to live in a house, let alone a mortgage. Instead, he asked Eddie how much he needed. Eddie didn’t want anything, he told him, just support. Your father then said something to him that he will never forget. 

“I have two loves in my life: my wife, and my daughter. Some people aren’t lucky enough to have that happen to them. Some dad’s leave, some do stupid shit and some die. I love my daughter with all my heart, but I don’t want her to feel stuck here. I don’t want her to worry about me or worry about what my future holds. I don’t want her to stop her life because her mother died. I’m gonna be okay. I’m going through it, and I’m always going to, but I’m okay. I’m practically an old man, I lived my life, and it was beautiful. It’s still beautiful, but I’m not gonna fully rest until I know that my daughter will be okay. And if she stays here, she won’t be.” He swallows, taking off his glasses to clean the lenses. “Now, I’m asking you how much you need not as a charity. But as a man, looking at a kid I watched grow up to become a man and fall in love with my daughter, who has been by her side through all of this. Wiped her tears, fed her, laugh with her. My daughter loved that house, and the fact that you didn’t even hesitate to call the realtor speaks volumes just what kind of man you are. You want to see her happy, and you are a big part of her happiness. I couldn’t have asked for a better man to love my daughter. I know her mother would agree. So, you’re gonna tell me a number, and I’m gonna do my best to give it to you. Don’t fight me on this.” 

Eddie had almost sobbed right there; it was one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to him. He told him a number, and your father said to give him two weeks. Part of him still didn’t want to take it, but he knew if he didn’t, your father would give the whole thing to the realtor. 

He had lit up another cigarette and blew his bangs out of his face. He had called you a few hours ago; you had the day off and planned on taking a nap. Eddie had told you he had found this certain type of acrylic paint you had needed and asked if he wanted to pick it up for you. You had thanked him but said no, and the rest of the phone call was uncomfortable silence. 

“Munson!” Sully’s booming voice comes echoing into the break room. 

Eddie sighs. “What?” 

Sully peeks his head in, his large frame would intimidate most people, especially since he had an enormous throat tattoo, but Sully was a big teddy bear. He was a businessman second, and a father to two beautiful little girls first. “You good, kid?” 

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He inhales on his cigarette and puts it out in the ashtray.

“Any word from her?” Sully was asking about you, and Eddie had told him he spoke to you a while ago. “How’s the money saving going?” 

Eddie had told Sully about his plans, and he was more than onboard with it. He said he was close to the owner of the record store on Newbury St in Boston, that he had put in a good word for him, and the owner was more than happy to welcome him into the store when he was ready. The record store in Boston was two floors, both floors had rows of records, and the bottom floor had a little sound stage where locals would perform for a monthly open mic night. 

Eddie had gone back on the floor with a tote of jazz vinyls, he sat in the aisle and organized the records by artist. Robin had come to visit, had sat on the floor with him, passing him each artist he asked for. 

“I’m worried about her.” Robin says suddenly, looking up to meet Eddie’s eyes. Eddie glances at her and goes back to moving around the vinyls, swallowing hard. 

“Me too.” Eddie says softly. 

“Has she said anything? When I saw her at the Hideout last week, she looked like a walking zombie for Pete’s sake.” Robin looks up at him, he shook his head, staring at his hands, the skull ring on his middle finger. He fingers it gently. “Are you alright, man?” 

“Not really.” He laughs tiredly and looks at her. “She won’t talk to me about how she’s feeling. She’ll talk to me about everything else but that.” 

“What happened at the cemetery?” She asked gently. 

Eddie shakes his head, running his hands over his face. “A breaking point, I think.” 

“Jesus.” She mutters. “What do we do? Intervention? Get a priest? I don’t know how this shit works; I’ve never had someone close to me die before. Is there a rule book? Do we just not say anything and let her be stubborn and just slowly disappear until she’s whittled down to nothing, and we just glue her back together and tell her we love her but what if at that point it’s too late and we can’t—"

Eddie kneels in front of Robin, gently holding her face. “Hey, breathe, dude. Deep breaths.”

“I don’t want anything to happen to her.” Robin tells him quietly, her eyes filling with tears as she looks at her friend. “Why did this have to happen?” 

Eddie caresses her head, gently patting her and pulls her in for a hug. “I don’t know.” He mutters. He was so tired of saying it, tired of saying he didn’t know, because it sounded so fucking simple, but it wasn’t. 

“Why doesn’t she want to talk to us? We’re her friends, she shouldn’t have to suffer alone.” Robin looks up at him and he sighs, gently knocking her chin. 

“I’m going over there after work. I don’t care if she hates me, I need to at least get an idea of what’s going on.” He leans back against the shelves, leaning his arms on his bent knees and Robin wipes her face. 

“How are you holding up?” Eddie looks at her. “With all of this? Losing her too?” 

Eddie gives her a sad smile. “Would you believe if I told you I was fine?” 

“No.” She smirks at him. 

“It’s a surreal feeling honestly.” He realizes he hasn’t spoken about this with anyone, even you. “The only time I ever experienced some sort of loss was when my dad went to prison, but fuck him, he can rot there for all I care. But he’s still alive, she’s not. I’m still trying to process how someone can be here one minute, living, breathing, and then just be…dead.” He shrugs, realizing he’s crying and quickly wipes his tears away, he almost laughs. “See? I don’t even notice I’m crying, it’s stupid.” 

“No, it’s not.” Robin says, reaching over to squeeze his knee. “You’re going through it too.” 

“Yeah, but I feel like I shouldn’t.” He sniffles, wiping his nose with the back of his hand. “She wasn’t my mother.” 

Robin gives him a sweet smile. “No, but she was the next best thing to you.” 

He sighs, shaking his head, another tear falls down his cheek. “There’s just so much pain in her. I can feel it.” 

He points to his heart, “I see how much pain she’s in and I want to take all of it, so she doesn’t have to, I’d rather suffer with it for the rest of my life, then watch someone like her go through that when she didn’t deserve it. Her mother didn’t deserve to die. I guess no one does, even the shitty ones.” 

“Nah, the shitty ones deserve it.” Robin laughs and Eddie chuckles. “You really love her, huh?” 

Eddie nods and he sighs, looking into her eyes. “I have to tell you something.” 

Eddie tells her his entire plan, about the house, about your father helping him with some of the down payment. He told her about going to see your childhood home, how it’s been on the market since June, and no one is interested. He told her that if his plan works, he’s gonna ask you to marry him the first night you sleep in the house, and that was the first time he has said it out loud. Robin cried happy tears, followed by punching him in the arm. 

“You guys are leaving me!” 

“Ow!” Eddie laughs, rubbing his arm. “It’s not even set in stone yet.”

“Dude, you know it’s gonna be!” Robin smiles, pulling him in for a hug. “I’m happy for you, but I’m gonna fucking miss you, man.” 

Eddie kisses the top of her head, rubbing her shoulder. “Yeah, I’ll miss you too.” 

“Steve is gonna be devastated.” 

“Nah he’ll be fine.” Eddie jokes. “Yeah, I know. His little boy is growing up.” 

“That sounds so gross when you say it like that.” 

                             ***

Eddie had driven to your house after closing the store; your car was still in the driveway and the outside lights were on. Your father had gone to Jimmy’s for the weekend, and he had called Eddie at the store to make sure he planned on going over there. Your father didn’t say it, but he was worried about you too. 

Eddie walks into the house, hearing the television playing in the living room. He peeks his head into the living and sees your form curled up on the couch, a knitted blanket over you with your hood over your head. It was freezing in the house, Eddie had saw you set the air conditioner to 60 degrees. The only source of light was from the television, it was nick at nite and I Love Lucy was playing. Eddie notices the three empty beer bottles on the coffee table, a half smoked joint, and a bottle of aspirin. He quietly clears the table, dumping out the remaining beer from the bottles in the sink and tossing them in the recycling. He washes his hands and heads back to the living room; he squats on the side of the couch where you were laying, leaning forward to kiss your cheeks softly and caress your head. You stir, opening your eyes, meeting Eddie’s and you smile softly. 

“Hey baby.” Eddie says sweetly to you, rubbing your cheek. 

“Hey.” Your voice is groggy, and you sit up a little, stretching. “What time is it?” You pull your hood down, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. 

“A little after ten. Go back to sleep, I just wanted you to know I was here.” He kisses the top of your hand, and you lean into him to kiss his lips. 

“No, it’s okay, I feel like I haven’t seen you.” You lay back on the couch pillow, reaching out your hand to cup his cheek. Eddie put his hand over yours, and scans your face, he hated how tired you looked. Your hair was in a messy braid over your shoulder, you looked like you had been crying for hours before he got there. 

And your eyes.

Eddie inhales a shaky breath as he looks in your eyes and sees that the light that was once there, was gone. You notice his staring. 

“What?” You ask with a smile. 

“Nothing.” He shakes his head, getting up and sitting next to you, lifting your legs to drape them over his lap. “I just missed you today.” 

You smile, reaching over to entwine your fingers. Eddie leans his head back on the couch, gently rubbing massaging circles around your thighs as you both stare at the television. 

Eddie feels you shudder under his touch, so he stops. 

Apparently, you didn’t want him to stop, because the next thing that happens is you straddling him, pressing your lips to his in a passionate kiss. He holds your waist tightly and groans when you grind yourself against his jeans. You pull off your hoodie, wearing only a lace bra and you deepen the kiss again. 

Talk to her, idiot! Eddie is saying to himself, and he moans in response when your teeth graze his throat. She knows exactly what she’s doing, she’s avoiding, she knows how she looks, stop kissing her and talk to her! 

Eddie’s conscious screams at him but he continues to kiss you, continues to touch your skin. His skin prickles with goosebumps when your hand touches his stomach above his jeans. Your hand slides down into his pants, grasping his hard length in your hand and Eddie moans loudly.  

You’re a stupid fuck! Snap out of it, dummy! 

“Wait, wait, wait.” Eddie finally says breathlessly against your lips. “Stop, stop.”

You pull away from him, removing your hand as if it burned. You stare at him with confusion and concern that you may have hurt him. Eddie runs his hands over his face, leaning forward on his knees. “We need to talk.” 

“Don’t like that.” You say softly, laughing a little, your heart was racing. 

“No, it’s not that kind of talk.” Eddie gives you a sad smile, taking your hand in his and rubbing his thumb over your skin. “You’re starting to scare me.” 

You pause, staring at his face. “What? What do you mean?” 

Eddie looks at you, really looks at you. “You know what I mean.” 

You pull your hand away from his and he sighs, he can already feel you pulling away, he can see it in your eyes too. “Eddie, I’m fine.” 

Frustration rose in his chest, and he wants to laugh but he doesn’t, he scoffs instead. “Is that a lie you’re telling me or telling yourself? Do you really think you’re fine?” 

She blinks, her eyes already widening with tears. “I’m not lying, Eddie.” 

“When was the last time you ate? When was the last time you did something you actually enjoyed? Because for two months, you have been disappearing in front of my eyes.” His own tears were filling his eyes, and he blinks them away. “You need to talk to me.” 

“And say what? What do you want me to say, Eddie?” You raise your voice. 

“Fucking anything!” He gets up from the couch and paces. You watch him with sad eyes. “Jesus Christ; I know you’re hurting; I know you’re in pain, I can clearly see that but all I’m asking is for you to talk to me. I told you I’m here for you, but instead you’re pushing me away!” 

“Okay. You want me to talk? Let’s talk.” Your bottom lip trembles as you look up at him and toss your hoodie back over your body. “Every single damn day I am praying that I don’t wake up in this life, and I wake up in the next because I am tired. I am so tired, Eddie. When I sleep, I don’t feel this fucking throbbing pain in my chest like I feel right now. When I sleep, I have dreams instead of nightmares now and I see her. I see her and she’s alive and I want to stay there. I physically cannot stand to look at myself in the mirror because of how fucked up I look. I don’t tell you these things because it’s not your fucking job to heal me, it’s no one’s job.” 

Eddie stands there stunned, his fingers clench around his chest, a lump forms in his throat, and a breath escapes him. “You’re telling me, that every day you pray you don’t wake up? How the fuck do you think that makes me feel?!” 

“You wanted to talk!” You snap at him. “You wanted the truth so I’m telling you!”

Tears form in his eyes as he stares at you. “Do you have any idea what that would do to me if I lost you? I mean, fuck, I feel like I’m almost there just by how you’ve been lately. It would destroy me if something happened to you. It would kill me. And you pray for that every day?”

You stand up from the couch, grabbing the joint from the table and lighting it quickly; you inhale and let the smoke billow from your nostrils. “I don’t want to die Eddie.” 

“Then what the fuck are you saying to me?!” He yells, tears spilling from his eyes. 

“I’m saying I don’t want to feel this pain anymore! If I could cut it out of me without bleeding out I would do it! If I could swallow a bunch of pills just to get rid of it and be okay, I would do it! I don’t want to die; I want to kill this part of me that feels all this pain and guilt and fucking grief and just be done with it!” You yell at him, hot tears stream down your face. “So yeah, I pray for it.” 

Eddie runs his hands over his mouth, a small sob escaping him as he stares at you. “Why haven’t you told me this?” His voice is so full of pain, it kills you. 

“Because it’s not your job to heal me.” 

“It is if I want to spend the rest of my life with you!” He cries and your breath hitches. “Fuck! I want it all with you. I want you; I want the marriage, I want those babies with you, I want a fucking house in the suburbs with a damn dog! Hell, maybe even a cat. But I meant it when I said that when I look to the future, you’re in it. And right now; I feel like you’re telling me you don’t want any of that.” 

“Of course, I do.” You say quietly, averting your eyes, wiping away your tears. 

“I don’t think you do.” Eddie’s hand goes over his heart again, feeling it slowly break. 

“You’re not inside my head, okay?” You snap at him and point to your temple. “It’s a fucking mess in here. Why would you want to be with someone for the rest of your life who can’t even take a shower? Who has a devil and angel on her shoulder, one telling her it’s okay to feel all this pain and the other telling her, grab those drugs from a few months ago! You won’t feel a goddamn thing!”

“Hold on a minute, you told me you didn’t have any left.” He was big mad; you could see it in his eyes. 

“I lied.” You meet his eyes, and he lets out a laugh. 

“I know exactly what you’re trying to do and hate to break it to you, sweetheart. It’s not gonna work.” He wipes his eyes and his nose. “Did you do it?” 

“No.” You whisper. 

“Go get it then.” Eddie sneers and you look at him like he slapped you. “If you want to do it, numb your pain that way, fucking doit. I’ll do it with you. It will be a Kodak fucking moment.”

“No. Eddie what the fu—" 

“Why? You want to kill that part of yourself, right? Why don’t you kill it slowly with the drugs? Better yet, I’ll go find the guy that supplied the shit that I had, and I’ll go on a fucking ride.” He heads towards the door, tears still running down his face, his eyes wild. You follow him and grab his arm. 

“Eddie, stop it! That could fucking kill you!” 

“Just a small part of me.” Eddie says, his tone cold. 

You let go of his arm, eyes narrowing. “Oh, fuck you!” 

“Stings, doesn’t it?” 

“What are you doing!? Why are you acting like this?!” You yell through your tears. 

“Because you’re not the only one who lost her!” It’s out of his mouth before he could stop himself. Your eyes are wide, glistening with tears. He stares at you, rubbing his palm over his lips. “I cannot imagine the pain you feel right now. But I look at you and I can feel it radiate it from you, every single day. The light in your eyes is gone. And it’s because you choose to suffer with this grief alone.” 

You step back from him, shaking your head as you stare at him. “You know what? You need to go. Get out.” 

“You think I’m gonna leave after what you just told me? You’re out of your mind.” He crosses his arms over his chest. 

“You are a fucking asshole!” Your eyes are wide, wild. You open the front door. “I don’t care if you sleep outside in your van, you need to get away from me!” Tears are pouring down your cheeks as you throw open the front door, you look up at him. “You promised me you wouldn’t push. You promised.” 

“I guess we’re both liars then.” His big brown eyes match your same wild ones, and you squeeze your eyes shut. 

“Please. Just go. Go away.” 

“I’m not leaving you.” Eddie says through his gritted teeth. 

“I want you to! I don’t want to see you! I don’t want to be in the same room as you! Get the fuck out of my house! Get out or I’m calling the fucking cops!” 

He stares at you hard. “You wouldn’t do that.” 

“I wouldn’t? I’ll just say the magic words, town freak, right?” 

His breath hitches and he felt his heart snap in two. Those words have haunted him for five years, and you used it as ammunition, you aimed, and fired. He looks out to his van and then back at you, his face turns from sadness to full on anger. “Fine. Go ahead and suffer alone.” 

He walks away from you, you slam the door shut, and slide down to the floor. Your breathing accelerates and you sob into your hands. You did it, you actually did it. You just took the last ten years, wrapped it up in a ball and threw it in the dumpster. 

Eddie hops into his van, not even bothering to put his seat belt on and peels out of your driveway. He doesn’t even know where he’s going, he just drives. His heart was pounding, behind his eyes stung, he felt like he had his entire body was vibrating. He passes the Leaving Hawkins sign and keeps driving until he’s on a dark stretch of road; he pulls over to the side and turns the car off. He leans his forehead against the steering wheel, his breathing picking up, his hands grip the wheel in a white-knuckle grip. He leans back, punching his dashboard not once, not twice, but three times, and he screams, the sound so guttural, so full of pain, full of anger. “Fuuuuuuck!!!!!!!” 

He sobs, hard. His body trembling as every single emotion that he had bottled up these last few months finally made its way to the surface. He shouldn’t have pushed, he knows that, but he’s glad he did. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have known how bad you were hurting, but it didn’t matter now. You told him to go, so he did.  He takes a cigarette out, lights it and inhales, his breath trembling as the smoke comes out. He didn’t want to feel like this anymore, he needed to feel something else other than this pain, and he felt like a goddamn hypocrite when he turns on the van, driving to Indianapolis to a spot where he knew he’d be able to get rid of his pain.  It didn’t matter now, none of it mattered, he was just pulling the strings to his own destruction. 

He completely disassociated on the ride to the city; he doesn’t even remember putting on music. He goes down a side street, trying to remember if he’s in the right spot, and when he sees the neon BEER sign, he knew he reached his destination. He only knew about this place because of his dad, he had brought him here when he was last out of prison. In every corner of the bar, someone was snorting something, drinking something, smoking something. He parks the van and gets out; as soon as he opens the door to the bar he is hit with aromas of weed, cigarette smoke, and stale beer. It wasn’t that crowded, and Eddie was glad. He sits on the stool at the bar, the bartender was an older woman, maybe in her late fifties, with kind eyes and a sweet smile. 

“What can I get you, honey?” She asks sweetly, placing a napkin in front of him. 

“Whiskey, please, straight.” He hands her a twenty-dollar bill, which she hesitates to take, but does anyway. 

She places the glass in front of him, and he brings the rim of the glass to his lips, knocking the whole thing back. He winces at the bitter taste and twirls his finger around asking for another. She refills his glass, and he nurses this one. 

“You look like you’ve been trekking through a war zone there, sweetheart.” She tells him gently, leaning against the bar, shining a glass. 

Eddie meets her eyes. “I don’t want to talk about it.” 

“I’m not gonna pry, I’m just not sure if you’ve come to the wrong place or the right place.” She gently pats his hand and goes down to the other side of the bar to talk to the other patrons. Eddie glances around the bar, and his eyes fix on a booth in the corner. There’s a man speaking to a woman with their heads bowed, she couldn’t have been much younger than Eddie, she was strikingly beautiful, but had very sad eyes, he notices the exchange. The man had put something in her hand, and she walks away from him, leaving the bar. The man notices Eddie staring and nods at him with a smile, Eddie nods back, looking away from him.  He stares at his glass, twirling it in his fingers, the brown liquid moves side to side as he stares at the glass. He turns his head to look over his shoulder, the man was still there, quietly sipping his beer, looking up at the television that had some sort of sports game on. 

Eddie knocks the rest of his second drink back and gets up from the stool. He feels the hair prickle on the back of his neck as he walks towards the man. The man looks at him and smiles, leaning back in his seat. He looked like a washed-up version of Robert DeNiro, a little intimidating, otherwise he seemed nice. 

Eddie takes out his hand and the man takes it. “Hi, I’m Eddie.” 

“Leon.” He sounded southern, Eddie thought. “What can I do for you?” 

“I don’t know, what do you got?” Eddie asks, already feeling the effects of the drugs that he didn’t even take yet. That’s how much he loved it the first time he tried it, and that was by accident. Again, it didn’t matter anymore. 

Puppet. 

“Uppers, downers, china white—"

Pulling the strings.

“How much for the China white?” 

Destruction. 

Eddie had driven back to the county line outside of Hawkins and had parked in an abandoned fishing spot. The only source of light was from the moon reflecting off the pond, and he opens the square. Leon had told him that if he wasn’t going to shoot it, he’d have to go slow, a small bump. Eddie hated needles, despite having all his tattoos, he couldn’t understand how someone could willingly stick a needle in their arm. 

You’re about to snort it, you stupid fuck. What’s the difference? It’s still heroin.

Eddie takes a cassette from under his seat, he didn’t even bother to look at who the artist was, he was gonna throw it out anyway. He sprinkles a little bit of powder on it, no bigger than his fingernail and takes a rolled-up dollar bill. With no hesitation, he’s snorting it into his air ways. He grunts, his nostrils stinging, and a wave of nausea hits him. The cassette tape falls out of his hands, and he feels the vomit hit the back of his throat. He pushes his door open with his shoulder, vomiting all over the ground. He leans his body onto the door panel, wiping his mouth, coughing a little and that’s when he feels it. His eyes flutter close, and he feels a smile grace his lips. 

“Oh shit.” He whispers, feeling the euphoria coursing through his blood stream, his nervous system, everywhere. He tries to think of something, think of you, think of her, and he felt nothing. Puppet. Strings. Destruction. He practically drags himself into his driver seat and slams his door. He reaches for the bag of powder, blindly finds the dollar bill and snorts again. He laughs when he lifts his head up, it falls back onto the headrest. Before he knew it, it was all gone and he was smoking a cigarette, his eyes half lidded, his head nodding to the side. He would jump awake, inhale on the cigarette and nod out again. He was just resting his eyes, he told himself. 

When he opens his eyes again, he’s in your driveway. He sits up straighter, seeing that it was still dark outside. How the fuck did I get here? He pushes the front door open and practically falls out. He holds his head, the sudden pressure from getting up too fast making him dizzy as he stumbles onto your front porch, pushing your door open. He calls your name, but you don’t answer. He notices the stillness as he stood there, noticing all the lights were off, there was no sound. He suddenly felt sober, and his feet take him to the center of your living room. The light from the bathroom came through the door that was ajar, and all he hears is the sound of his own breathing and his footfalls. 

He pushes the door open slowly with his palm, the hinges squeaking, and he sees you lying there. You’re on your back, your head tilted to one side, arms splayed out, unmoving. 

A groan escapes him, a sound that started from the very depths of his soul. His body falls against the door, and he falls to his knees. His body felt stiff as he crawled to you, hot, angry tears were pooling from his eyes. 

“Nooo…” He groans, his hand shaking as he turns your face, your eyes in a fixed stare. He inhales deeply, cupping your face. You just have to kiss her, and she’ll wake up. That’s all, like Snow White and Sleeping Beauty. 

Eddie kisses your lips gently, his tears falling to your cheeks, and he lifts his head. You still lay there unmoving, no breath from your lips. His mouth falls open in a gasp as he looks at you, and his body shakes with sobs. He stares at your face, he couldn’t understand what was happening, why this was happening. 

“Please come back to me, please. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean anything I said, please.” He cups your face, smoothing back your hair; you were so cold. “Just wake up now, and we can start over, that’s all. Just wake up…please!!!”  He cries and cradles your limp body to him, trying to figure out something, anything that will get you to wake up. He kisses your cheeks, your hair, your forehead. 

His head falls back, and a loud, guttural wail escapes his lungs. “Nooooooo!!!” 

“Nooooo!” Eddie screams himself awake. The sun was beating down on him in the van as he catches his breath, looking around, panic and fright in his wide brown eyes. He was still parked at the pond. He feels bile rise in his throat and barely gets the door open before he’s violently vomiting on the ground. His vomit from the night before inches from where he stood. He wipes his mouth, his skin sweaty, damp. He squints in the sunlight and holds his stomach. He was still high, but functional, his logical part of his brain working faster than it did last night. 

“Fucking idiot, Munson.” He says to himself, and then he remembers his dream. A breath is caught in his throat, and he scrambles himself back in the van, he starts it up, throwing it into reverse and speeds out of there. He was dry heaving on the way to your house, having to stop only once to pull over and vomit again. 

He almost forgets to put the van into park when he screeches into your driveway. He almost falls out and scrambles up the steps, your door was unlocked. He doesn’t bother closing it when he runs in and shouts your name. His blood ran cold when he didn’t get a response from you, and he screams your name again. He runs into the living room, his breath caught when he sees that the bathroom door is ajar like in his dream. His heart pounded and he felt his hands shake: it was just a dream, it wasn’t real. Just a dream. 

The door squeaks open, and you walk out, towel drying your hair from taking a long hot shower. A whimper escapes his lungs, and he startles you. 

The towel falls from your hands as you stare at him and he stares at you, he’s looking at you like he’s seeing a ghost. You immediately notice his features, his pale face, his eyes wide with panic, almost black. He was sweaty, and your hand goes to your mouth to hold back your cry, you knew immediately what he had done and part of you felt responsible. 

There was desperation on both of your faces, and the two of you crash into each other, sobbing and holding each other. Eddie holds your face in his hands, kissing you over and over, his tears mixing with yours. 

“You’re here.” He kept saying and you weren’t sure why. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” He cries holding your face and you shake your head, sputtering, you can feel your face flush as you caress his face, his hair, staring into his eyes. 

“No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have had you leave. I didn’t do the rest of the drugs, I got rid of them, I flushed them. I didn’t do them, I swear.” Panic is in your voice, and he holds onto your waist tightly as you keep touching him, keeping him upright. 

Eddie feels his heart split in two and feels the guilt bubbling up in his chest as his head falls to your shoulder and he sobs. You hold him there, rubbing the back of his head as you both sobbed. “I fucked up last night, I’m so sorry. But I needed to not feel anything. I thought it didn’t matter, I thought I lost you forever and I couldn’t…couldn’t handle losing another person, I couldn’t handle that pain. There’s so much of it and I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing.” 

You pull away and hold his face, shaking your head as you give him a small smile. “We have to feel it, I realized that after you left last night. That’s one of the only ways that lets us know that she was real, that the pain is real; that our love is real.” 

“How do you not hate me?” His lip trembles. “After everything I said, after what I did.” 

“Because I love you. No matter what and that’s a hard fucking pill to swallow when you realize how much you love a person, even when you’re so fucking angry at them.”

You run your thumb along his lips, and he smiles softly. “When you left last night, I wanted to die. I was awful to you, I pushed you away because I thought your life would be a lot less chaotic without me in it. And then…” You inhale deeply, your voice shaking. “Then I felt her. I felt this warmth, this blanket of pure comfort and I just let it consume me. Everything poured out, I thought my guts were gonna shut down and I would be stuck in a loop of constant tears forever, but I let her in, and she stayed awhile.” 

Eddie laughs a little as tears continue to fall from his eyes, he caresses your face, your hair and kisses you softly. “I love you.” He whispers to you. 

“I know.” You smirk up at him, wiping away his tears. 

He kisses you again, wrapping his arms around your shoulders, letting out a sigh of relief. You hold him tight, rubbing his back and arms. 

He takes a shower soon afterwards; scrubbing the last night away until his skin felt raw, and he swore he rubbed off most of his chest tattoos. He finds you in your room, and he walks in with no shirt, and just his jeans. His wet curly hair stuck to his chest. You’re sitting upright, sketching in what looks like your mother's sketch pad. 

He sits on the edge of your bed, glancing down at the book. “You’re sketching?” 

You look up at him and smile; you were just doodling. Some wildflowers, eye shapes, your hands. You didn’t feel ready to paint yet, and you forgot how much you loved to sketch. You couldn’t force yourself to be happy, but you could try to be a bit more human. 

You feel his eyes on you and look up again. He’s smiling that sweet smile, his dimples large. He still looked a little high, but he was less sweaty, less jumpy. He wasn’t entirely sure how he was going to feel once it was completely out of his system. Would it hurt? He wondered. But he realized he didn’t care if it did, he deserved to feel that pain.

You close the sketch pad and put it on your nightstand, you scoot closer to him, you drape your legs on either side of him while he kneeled. His hand reaches up to caress your face, your lips, and you pull his mouth towards yours in a sweet kiss. You lay back, taking him with you, he cups your face, his other hand going to your leg to hook around his waist, the kiss deepening. His lips travel to your throat, leaving a soft trail of kisses there and to the center of your chest. You sigh lovingly at his touch, and he lifts up your shirt, leaving soft kisses on your tummy, around your navel and ribs. He feels you shudder at his touch, and he pulls you up, peeling your shirt over your head. You were naked underneath, and he kisses you again. The tips of his fingers glide up your arm, leaving goosebumps to prickle on your skin. You grip his forearm, and gently move your fingers up and down as he kisses your neck, slowly moving down, leaving soft kisses around your breasts, and taking your nipple into his mouth, gently sucking. Your back arches and you moan; he goes to your other breast, gently kissing and sucking. His hand travels down your belly while he teases your nipples, and he snaps the button of your jeans. He meets your lips passionately again, grunting softly as his hand slides down over your sex and fingers your clit generously. You arch your hips, and he pulls off your jeans and underwear. He hovers above you after taking off his own jeans and rubs your face. He leans down to kiss you, his lips soft. You let out a moan and he grunts when you feel him push himself inside you, your back arches at the feeling, a loving sigh escaping your lips. His mouth stays hovered above yours as he thrusts, and you look into his eyes. His fingertips dig gently into your thighs and a throaty moan escapes his lips.  He caresses your face, kissing your lips softly, burying his face in your chest, licking around your nipple again. You grip his shoulders, moaning loud, the sensation of his gentleness, the grinding of his hips, was enough to get you to scream. Your orgasm was building in your lower belly, but you didn’t want this feeling to end. You held onto it, and flipped him onto his back, riding him gently, your palms on his chest. Your clit rubs against his pelvis, and your head falls back in a whimper. He holds your hips, his head arching back against the pillow. He sits up, holding him to you in the butterfly position, his arms tightly around your middle, his lips against your breast. The tingles in your belly grow, and you clench around him, your head falls back as you cry out in pleasure, your orgasm causing every part of your body to tremble, and tears spring to your eyes. He groans against you as he orgasms soon after you, he holds you to him, still catching up on your breathing and you look into his eyes. His hand caresses your cheek, and he kisses you gently. You push yourself off him so you’re sitting more in his lap, pressing your forehead against his and he hugs your waist.

Staring into his big brown eyes, you give him a soft smile, gently petting his face. “From now on, we need to be honest with each other. No more secrets.”

He shakes his head, smiling at you. “No more secrets.”

“I’m not okay, Eddie.” You tell him quietly, your eyes filling up with tears, he tightens his hold. “And I won’t be for a long time. When she died…I think, I think a part of me did too. That’s where that pain is.” You press your hand over your heart, and he gently kisses the center of your chest. “They say there’s stages of this grief, but I think they’re full of shit. I think you go through each stage, over and over and over again. It’s constant, like a running stream. And I know you’re not okay, either. You were right when you said that I’m not the only one who lost her—”

“Sweetheart, that was—”

“Let me finish.” You smile at him, kissing his nose and he stares into your eyes. “I’m not the only one that lost her. Yeah, I lost the bond that we formed as soon as I was born, I lost the late-night talks and getting my tears wiped away because she was my mother. You lost someone very special to you, someone who showed you love and comfort and a bond that can be so rare to find. I will never take that away from you. Your grief is your grief, not mine. But we can heal together. It's not gonna be easy, it’s gonna be really fucking hard but I plan on doing this with you for the rest of my life. I plan on feeling every single emotion that God or whoever the fuck throws at me, at us. I plan on you being by my side until we’re old, watching our grandchildren grow up, yelling at each other on how to figure out technology because let’s face it, this world is going to be run by machines soon. You are the best thing, the craziest thing, that has ever happened to me, and I’m gonna hold onto that until I can’t anymore.” 

His eyes are filled with tears, and he smiles large, kissing you passionately. You hug him tightly, kissing his cheek before getting off his lap. He lights up a cigarette, inhaling it deeply and stretches. He looks at you with his arm draped over his shoulder, just watching you. He stands up to get dressed but you stop him.

“Wait.” You tell him, grabbing your sketch book. “Stay like that."

"What? Why?” He laughs.

“Shut up, don’t move.” 

He smiles at you and stays still, and you begin to sketch out his form. Eddie suddenly felt shy as he hears your pencil hit the paper, this was such an intimate moment, and he didn’t want to mess it up. You concentrated so hard on what you were doing, and he felt his heart skip a few beats as he watches you, both nude, just the sounds of the creativity coming out of your brain. 

You smiled when you were finished, and Eddie was able to move his limbs, feeling stiff all over. You wipe off the pencil dust and hand it to him. He smiles large, you had captured him so beautifully and he realizes it was true, you saw him for who he truly was. 

Just Eddie. 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Autumn had come out of nowhere, and you wrap your sweater tighter around you as another wave of nausea hits you. You had left work early; it seemed like every twenty minutes you were running to the bathroom to puke your guts out. You tried to think about what you had eaten the night before; was it the chicken? Was it the leftover meatloaf you had made for your father’s birthday? Eddie had been very cryptic lately, and it was starting to piss you off. He would ask you questions about what color paint you’d use to paint a kitchen, hardwood or carpet; you would overhear him talking to your father about stuff that had to do with finances, and your father had a glint in his eyes, and you tried to think of anything that could possibly make sense. The nausea hits you again and you run to the bathroom and vomit hard. You swore there was nothing left in your system to vomit but your body had other plans. You lean against the tub, the coolness of the porcelain an odd comfort against your skin. 

Your eyes land on an unopened box of tampons, and a sudden thought occurred to you. Closing your eyes, you think back to when you last had your period; trying to figure out the math was like trying to figure out a formula with Einstein.  Your eyes snap open; it had been over a month since your last period.

A month. 

Nausea hits you again and you grip the porcelain, preparing for the worst but nothing comes. “There’s no way.” You say to yourself and lift yourself up on shaky legs. 

Grabbing your keys, you rush out the door to your car, and go into a local pharmacy. You take the first test you see, and don’t make eye contact with the cashier as she rings you up.  When you arrived home, you were grateful Eddie was still at work, and your father was finishing up a construction job in Ohio. You rip open the test, reading the directions. 

“Pee on it? How the fuck…” Your eyes squint as you look at the small diagram drawing of how to get coat the test in urine. Groaning, you pull down your pants, and do your business, yelling comedically as you get urine all over your hand trying to match the test up with the stream. The directions said you had to wait three minutes for the results, and you sit on the toilet lid, your leg bopping up and down anxiously as you wait. 

Once the three minutes was up, you don’t look right away. Your arm reaches the sink counter, and you take it, looking down at the tiny window. There were two lines, and you suddenly forgot what that meant. You scramble to dig the directions out of the trash, scanning the black ink until you reach the result section. 

One line meant it was negative. 

Two lines meant…

Your hands shake as you stare at the test in your hand, like it was a rare piece of art, and you were trying desperately to see if the picture would move. 

No matter how you look at it, the result is gonna stay the same. 

A smile creeps up on your lips, tears well in your eyes and you cover your mouth with your hand. 

Something happens to you just now; it felt like the Earth shifted right at your feet. Before there was a constant tilt for so many months, now suddenly it was upright. Everything seemed brighter, you felt a dull ache in your chest, but it wasn’t pain, no, it was something different. 

Something warm. 

There was a human being growing inside you. Yours and Eddie’s baby. Your father’s grandchild, your mother’s grandchild. Yours. A being that had a part of you and a part of the man you loved. Your best friend, your lover, your confidant. 

You were going to be parents. 

You were going to be a mother. 

[liminalmemories21]

2023 Writing Round Up!

tagged by @jesuisici33. Thank you!

Writing Round-Up: Share what you wrote this year! It can be works you posted to Ao3, Wattpad, Tumblr, or anywhere else! You can share everything you wrote or just the ones your most excited about.

Fewer stories this year, but they were all mostly much longer. I genuinely cannot believe that Knave 2 was this year, it feels like so long ago, but apparently was just February. I also can't believe I wrote it in two months. I think maybe Knave 3 kicked my ass so much I forgot that Knave 2 wasn't longer ago.

February

The Knave of Hearts . . . he said he'd steal no more (February 25, 2023 | 60,161 words | Rated E | Tarlos | White Collar AU)

Do you know where Tyler was the night of the 10th?"

"TK," he repeats stubbornly.

Mattheson looks up. "What?"

"His name is TK. Nobody calls him Tyler except his mother.”

Mattheson makes an ostentatious show of noting the correction in the file, although it hasn’t made a difference the last seven times Carlos has said it. "So, the night of the 10th, do you know where Mr. Strand was?"

June

We Were in Screaming Color (June 25, 2023 | 66,639 words | Rated E | Tarlos | Season 4 Interstitials)

All the conversations we didn't see in Season 4

July

The square root of sixty nine (July 6, 2023 | 11,630 words | Rated E | Tarlos)

5 times TK asked for consent + 1 time Carlos did

August

A Secret is a Strange Thing - Owen, Gwyn, Enzo (August 5, 2023 | 5,793 words | Rated T | Tarlos adjacent)

character studies - six kinds of secrets each person kept

October

to be at home in fragments (October 9, 2023 | 3,488 words | Rated G | Tarlos)

collection of tumblr prompts

November

The Knave of Hearts . . . brought back the tarts (November 17, 2023 | 65,951 words | Rated E | Tarlos | White Collar AU)

It starts so innocuously that it’s hard to pinpoint, even in hindsight. But he thinks that maybe it was his father’s birthday, sitting on the porch waiting to digest lunch before they embark on cake. TK is sketching a line of Steinlen style cats to march along the walls of Marisol’s bedroom. [ . . .]

His father laughs at the two of them. “That reminds me actually, a friend of yours stopped by to visit me the other day." TK freezes in reaching for his ice tea, and Carlos’s father arches an eyebrow. "Tulson. Agent Tulson stopped by my office. Who did you think I meant?”

TK exhales and picks up his glass. “The mind boggles. What did Matt want?”

“Wanted to ask if I’d heard any rumors about a new art thief nosing around town for targets.”

Think It Over, Think It Under (November 30, 2023 | 12,864 words | Rated T | Tarlos adjacent)

6 conversations TK had with his sisters-in-law + 1 conversation Carlos had with his sisters

December

Once Upon a Bus coming soon - the bus driver AU

tagging @ladytessa74, @chicgeekgirl89, @chaotictarlos, @strandnreyes, @paperstorm, @rmd-writes, @louis-ii-reyes-strand, @reyesstrand, and @welcometololaland

[patheticbatman]

As of Chapter 81, this is crew of the Courageous from Time to Orbit: Unknown, a marvellous space drama and mystery by @derinthescarletpescatarian . Original sketches & character guide below. Many of the character appearances are based on headcanon, but the ones with asterisks are based on canon sources.

I drew Celi first! I figured I would do the people in front, who I would have to draw most of their bodies, and work from left to right. Celi has had multiple organ issues, so she looks a little drawn (lol) and is still recovering in her wheelchair :). I drew her with small braids just hanging from the top of her head, as I imagine she’s too tired to take care of her hair very often, but still wants to keep some, so she has a sort of cap of braids. There’s probably a term for the style, but idk. Celi is of North African descent.

Next to Celi is Renn. His head looks wonky because I was drawing at an angle at the time. He’s been mostly depilated, and I imagine him in a sort of Aang-meets-European-in-a-tracksuit outfit because he’s calm and tries not to do much drama, but is condescending. Renn is of West Asian/American/Tarandran descent.

Then we have Public Universal Friend (PUF) 2 with the twists. I figure it doesn’t want a lot of hair to take care of, and this style keeps it out of its face. Same clothes as the other PUF. It is kneeling, with one leg propped up. It is of coastal Southern East African descent.

*Then laying on the ground is Tal. Ke is looking at kes tablet because ke doesn’t like focusing on other things. Tal is unfortunately at the wrong angle to show off ke’s face tattoo. Small afro kept stylishly kept, along with some garters and a short skirt. Ke is laying down because ke feels like it. Ke is of West African/American/Texan descent.

*Then we have Aspen, the POV character, smack dab in the middle. Canonically, they’d don’t have a headband as far as we know, but I think their hair looks nice pushed up like that. They are wearing a jumpsuit like last time, but this time has a belt for flair, because Tal and Sunset convinced them. Aspen sits cross cross because they can and it’s a common sitting posture in Arborea. They are of West African/American/Arborea Atlantican descent.

Lina is kneeling like PUF2, but facing the other way. I gave her buns and square jewelery because I based her off of a Hopi woman’s ’do that I really liked, and Lina can be short for names like Catalina. She has freckles because they’re fun. She’s gained some muscle and weight since the last picture, which is great! She is of Hopi/Latin American descent.

Last is Sunset. She is a zeelite, a subculture interested in replicating and investigating pre-Neocambrian (aka our time) cultures. She is largely inspired by what she knows of punk, pastel goths, drag, and to be honest, Barbie (2023). She is voguing because she knows and appreciates the importance of looking good. Sunset is of Central African/of Sirius descent.

Now for the top row, left to right again!

First, we have Heli. She wears functional but pretty clothes because she appreciates utility but always wants to show off what she’s got. The newest addition to the crew, she’s a little spiky, but has a soft spot for Adin. She was inspired by a picture of a Sistergirl from Australia (my headcanon, I only saw a picture of her and was unable to find more specific information). Heli is of Indigenous Australian descent.

*Next, we have Adin. I keep forgetting to draw him with tattoos, so I added a neck one last minute. His look has probably changed the most - his canon picture came out only a few months ago, so I drew him differently the first time. Adin cooks a lot, so he doesn’t try to wear anything or have a hairdo that could be ruined by cooking. Adin is of West African/Arborea Atlantican/American/Texan descent.

*Next up, the tallest of the bunch (and I forgot to draw his left arm until last minute, we have Denish! He’s doing the Arnold Schwarzenegger pose. The gentle Giant of the group, I was unable to recapture his face quite the same way as last time, but I still think he turned out well. He’s one of my favorite space pirates. I think he wears high collars to hide Tinera’s hickeys. Denish is of West African/American/Texan descent.

Right in front of Denish is PUF 1, AKA Dr. PUF. Still has tousled hair, still has the same robe. PUF is kneeling. It is of European descent.

*Hanging off of Denish is Tinera! She’s changed also, as her official looks came out, though I think I’ve kept her pretty nice looking still! I forgot to give her glasses though :(. I gave her Garnet (Steven Universe) finger gloves because they look cool. Tinera is of Central African/Lunarian descent.

Under Tinera is Sam. He’s partly visually inspired by the Dad of some kids I watch, and Ballister from Nimona. He likes to gaze at the stars and wonder about all the stories that will be told about them. Sam is of South Asian descent.

*Lastly is Keldin (AKA Captain Sands). He’s always dressed well and keeps his hair well-coifed. Hardly anyone from the ‘first’ crew likes him. He is standing awkwardly farther away because he knows everyone near him isn’t his tan. Keldin is of West African/American/Trandran descent.

[reiline]

My Sole Survivor Daniella (Dani), I wanted to draw her long ago

Several random headcanons:

1)At the beginning of the main events she’s 25 y.o.

2) She got the scar on her face from the deathclaw cub. Even babies can tear skin to flesh with their claws, but Dani managed to dodge at the last moment, so the cut didn’t come out very deep

(she has a few other small scars and moles on her body, but I forgot to add them at the end)

3) Piper once gave Dani a handmade "lucky" cap, like a talisman as a gift for her friend. Once, at the time of the transaction with one of the unpleasant and rude merchants, Dani didn’t notice the fake cap mixed with the rest, and paid as it was. In general, the merchant caught her cheating, and the situation could have gotten out of control if not for the presence of Hancock at her side. As soon as he silently demonstrated his shotgun, the merchant immediately chickened out and accepted an apology and a real cap from Dani, who tries to avoid conflicts whenever possible

4) Dani had an older brother who lived in Washington with his family. Even if he managed to survive and get to the vault, he was hardly put into cryogenic sleep, so at best he died of natural causes, and Dani would never learn of his fate

5) Like many before the war, Dani married not for love, but because it was so accepted. She was quite lucky: her husband was a handsome, decent military man who sincerely loved her, supported her and, most importantly, didn’t put pressure on her or try to force her to love him. After the birth of her son, she even began to feel something more than a simple affection for him, but they weren’t destined to take their relationship to the next level when nuclear war broke out

6) Dani is very beautiful. Even after weeks and months of living in new realities, her ability to love and sympathize with others never faded, and the scars didn’t spoil her in any way and only added zest. There were downsides to this, and Dani repeatedly fought back against those unable to keep their household in their pants, but so far she’d been saved by natural luck and her favorite gun

7) The Institute is destroyed. Dani left synth!Shaun alive, but refused to be his guardian/mother/whatever. For several weeks the boy lived in the Railroad headquarters, but one day Desdemona informed Dani that Shaun had left, possibly outside of Boston. For a while, Dani worried about him and wished she’d tried to take him in or shelter him in one of the settlements, but soon she came to terms with it, and she would never see Shaun again

.

.

Music theme: 🎶 Massive Attack - Teardrop I don't have as many ideas for Fallout 4 as for Mass Effect, and I don't have my own OCs within the universe, but perhaps I will sometimes sketch for it too ;)

[synthshenanigans]

woah hey a year has been passed wowie :0

First two weren't posted here cos they were too long ago & not CJish related but love the way he took up 70% of the year lol

[ Full images + templates below :} ]

[TW for Bright Colors, maybe blood & very very vague themes of depression/suicide for like 2 drawings I believe]

Long text about the arts if anyones actually curious!!

January: An old OC I completely forgot about until making this. He's based on old radio like things :}

February: Played Person 5 Royal last year & drew Joker cos idk he's neat. Fun fact, the same day I fully finished the game was the day Storm & a Spring came out. Also while grinding in the game, I had his Bidding & VoaC covers on repeat. Which was a bit annoying to do since they weren't on Spotify yet & YT on mobile didn't have looping then.

March: The Hawaii Part ii album cover :} I did post that eventually but that's the time I actually made it. Had listened to TME a couple of months before then which got me into the album, so months later I drew it cos why not? [Also the month Vol.1 fully released on everything. What's funny is my gallery for that day was a handful of memes I saved at 4am before I fell asleep. And then the next image saved is when I woke up which was a screenshot of the whiteboard in TfaR lol]

April: First main Jash art !!! And its not even with any of the songs from Vol. 1 lol. I had his Moss cover on repeat again & now that all of Vol. 1 was out, I drew Heart in some moss. Or really in the image from the video.

May: Lil animation I made of Heart with the song Don't Hit the Lights! Link to my post & the song can be found here :}. Still really like the song & even the drawings. Might remake em eventually idk

June: Sky/socialc1imb's Clue AU! I like murder mysteries & this one was real interesting so I drew it a lot lol. Might remake that one or one of the others I made at somepoint? It'll be a bit later if I do but ye

July: A redraw of a HMS piece I originally made back in May, based on the Three Wise Monkeys thing. I like the idea of it so I keep wanting to remake it.

August: I honestly can't remember if I posted that art or not. Actually yea I don't think I ever did PFFT. It's one of the few drawings I did of myself this year & its from CJs Not Perfect cover [as you can tell by the lyrics on it]. Also one of the very very few vent-ish arts I made. I like the background more than anything but its still neat ig?

September: Art for one of the best songs ever. I love Fine, I'm Fine its so good & I listened to it for like 70% of the 20+ hours it took me to make the drawing. Still proud of it so there's the sketch I drew on paper, the one on my tablet & then the final versions.

October: There was a lot from this month due to Jashtober. I still like this one lot & it wasn't insanely rushed so I picked this one to show lol.

November: I have no idea why I made a fun lil soul. I was having an identity crisis over my art style & ig decided to draw the guy who is a walking identity crisis/j

December: Same as September. One of my favorite songs ever was covered & released, so I made a drawing like everyone else lol.

[arnold-layne]

Hi!! I recently found you through a friend’s recommendation, and I absolutely love your work! So I was wondering if you had any recommendations of your fics? Cause they’re just so good and there’s a lot of them I just don’t know where to start!

aw thank you so much! also you should high five your friend, they have good taste 🤭

recommendations... well, i love all my children equally but some of them are better fit to start with than the others

many know my work by my three-year-lasting epic pirate au in darkness shall you be reborn, which i recommend reading on ao3 because i haven't updated the masterlist in quite a while. it's pretty indicative of my style and preferences and even shows my craft progress through the years

then there is we, the psychos, which has been going on since 2019 and which i recently picked up again. apart from ch. 1 & 2 it's all been written over the last month so like, the latest, the freshest of my writing

another pretty recent work is as we were falling, which i only posted to tumblr and not ao3. i wrote it in the middle of a writing block and the quality is not that good but it's a decent wip that i hope to continue

if you want a finished fic, then i have only one suggestion for you, and it's ex malo bonum. written pretty long ago in mania-like state over a month. it's pretty old and many forgot about it which i think is unfair it's pretty good

not sure if you want any of my original works, but just in case you do, here's my recent sci-fi short story Bloodeaters

and of course i can't forget the fic that still gets me the majority of "please update" comments, What Is Lost, What Is Found. it's my first real attempt at english writing, and it will probably show, but people love it

now we're getting deeper in arnold lore. i'm an avid fan of red dead redemption 2, which brought yall this fic: the wild, the wayward and the wicked. still hope to come back to it at some point

im also an even more avid fan of the fallout franchise, which, by analogy, birthed this fic: war?

the rest of my writing are mostly oneshots and sketches, and you can find most of them on my masterlist. it hasn't been updated in a while but i seem to have covered the major changes

[silly-inky]

Hiya! Hello! It's me, ya boi

Updates people Updates!

So I'm making this sort of list of things I am in the process of making or should start working on soon (or things I have yet to post about yet) with little updates about them

Dimentio drawing- this is going alright so far but is a somewhat complicated piece where I will have 2 different end results, one with his mask and one without. I'm on the shaping phase of my lineart which is usually fun for me but I decided to take a small break from it as I was put off by how much time I spent on the sketch (about 30 hours) this does not mean the piece is complicated, just that it took a while to get everything right. I will get back to drawing this soon. This is a digital drawing

You were someone to me a lifetime ago- so for those who don't know I have a fic I'm working on. I released chapter 4 last month and hope to start working on the 5th chapter this month. After the last chapter was posted I started working on the layout of the story as up until this point I was just winging it and going with the flow with not much of a plan, but I know I should have some sort of base to follow in order to keep my writing consistent and have proper flow, because of this I have planned several chapters in advance now, and those who enjoy it will be happy to know that this fic will most likely have more than 30 chapters although I cannot say what number there will be specifically. I want to try and get more chapters out in a short amount of time as I don't want to drag this out but I cannot promise anything

My writing and ideas- so as said in a previous post, I have quite a few ideas that I have had but didn't share in here either because I was too lazy, forgot, or was self conscious. I will probably start to work on a few I already have written out and start to post them, I will also start to post more headcanon posts. Because of all these ideas I have had I actually have some other things that i will be able to share, which lead into..

Mario AU- an AU ( alternate universe) of which I made sort of out of the blue by accident which I have slowly been building on and I even have some doodles to go along with the basic lore of it. What is this AU you ask? Well you'll just have to wait and see, I will say that there is definitely some role swap in which makes things very interesting

Shipping- so for some who may have guessed, I am a multi-shipper, which isn't anything new but I preface this because of me delving into these ships a bit more. For instance me drawing Dimentio has sparked a lot of Dimentio and Dimigi (Dimentio x Luigi) ideas to form and be made, I shipped it before hand but I was and still am focused on booigi. So you may very well see some Dimigi soon as well as your scheduled booigi

Please do keep in mind like I have stated many times before, I struggle with motivation a lot and it can be very difficult for me to get things done, I don't know when any of this will be finished and forcing myself to get it all finished now will only burn me out more. I'm sorry I haven't been posting a lot of content recently as I've been struggling with a few things recently, I'll try and get content out for you as soon as I can and I hope it will make up for it. I was hoping that at least by posting this you will be aware of my plans and what is currently in the works so you guys are up to date

Also I wanted to just say that I appreciate the asks so much, it really means a lot and I love answering them! I do want to add if you are one of the 2 maybe 3 people who submitted an ask a little while ago, I just want to say that I haven't forgotten about them, I wish to draw proper responses for them I just haven't gotten around to it hey, I hope to answer them soon for you though

Have some old pics of my son (ignore how pale I am)

[lilac-hecox]

Red number two looks very interesting :o

(Ty!!)

2. "I'm so fucking pissed." - Ian/Shayne | Ian/Anthony

--

Anthony is back at Smosh for three whole months before he finds out about Ian and Shayne. The worst part is that he didn't find out because Ian bothered to tell him, no, he found out because he happened to see them together.

Anthony and Ian had been working late at the Smosh office alongside Josh as they finished up the vocals for a song they planned on incorporating into one of their future sketches. Ian had stretched and glanced at the clock before he sighed.

"I actually gotta get going," he had said.

"Oh?" Anthony started, taking off the headphones as he had looked at his best friend, "What's up?"

"Nothing serious, just dinner plans with a friend," Ian explained, "and if I don't leave now I'm going to be late."

Josh offered his hand in the air for Ian to give him a high five, not quite tearing his eyes away from the music program he had pulled up on his computer.

"I'll be in normal time tomorrow morning if I need to re-do anything," Ian explained as he high fived Josh. Then he moved over towards Anthony, giving him a bright smile and a quick side hug that Anthony only just had enough time to return.

"Okay, man, see you later," Anthony had said, the headphones hung around his neck. Ian wasn't obligated to tell him all his plans, but he hadn't mentioned a dinner at all when Anthony asked if he didn't mind staying a little late tonight.

Anthony picked up the headphones and was about to put them back on when he noticed Ian's phone sitting at the edge of the table they had been working at. Anthony had rolled his eyes, taking off the headphones fully before he went and grabbed Ian's phone.

"I'm going to try and catch him," Anthony had explained to Josh as he hustled out of the room, hoping to catch Ian before he left the parking lot in his car.

Ian was in the parking lot by the time Anthony had caught up to him, but he wasn't alone. Shayne was there, his own car parked next to Ian's, his stocky frame pressing Ian up against the side of his own vehicle. Shayne had a hand cupping Ian's jaw as they kissed slowly, familiarly, in the studio parking lot.

Anthony had stood there dumbfounded, Ian's phone slack in his hand. He doesn't remember exactly what had happened next. Whether he made a sound or whether Ian could sense him there, but either way Ian looks up and catches Anthony's eye.

He and Shayne break apart like they are suddenly burning each other.

"Anthony!" Ian said, breathless, his face red. Shayne looked at the ground, unable to meet Anthony's eyes.

"You, um, forgot your phone," Anthony had explained, holding up the device as proof of his reason for being outside, for seeing what he did.

Ian, still beet red, strode across the parking lot and took his phone from Anthony's outstretched hand.

"I-" Ian started, looking up at Anthony with worry.

"Your dinner," Anthony said, trying to keep his voice neutral.

"What?" Ian had said, confusion lacing his voice.

"You're going to be late, remember?" Anthony had said, trying to play it cool though his insides were swirling like he had just ingested something toxic.

Ian had nodded, had turned away from Anthony, "Right."

Then, Anthony was gone, back inside the office, not willing to let the scenario play out in front of him.

--

That was three days ago. Three days where Anthony and Ian didn't talk about what happened, what he saw. Anthony had finished out his session that night with Josh, trying to pour himself into work and forget what he saw outside in the parking lot.

The next day he worked on his solo channel, not going to the Smosh office. He didn't talk to Ian at all. His mind reeled, haunted by what he saw, his body and mind trying to digest it, process it, make sense of why the image of Shayne and Ian kissing was making Anthony feel like he swallowed glass.

Deep down, he knew why, he just didn't want to give it a voice.

Anthony had saw Shayne and Ian kiss on a Monday evening. He wasn't back in the office until today, until Thursday. Mercifully, Shayne happened to have the day off, but Anthony knew he would see Ian. He had half-expected Ian to text him after the incident, try to explain or...apologize? For what, Anthony wasn't sure. But Ian never texted and now Anthony sat stewing in the conference room.

The more he thought about it, the angrier he got. How could Ian keep this from him? Why did it not come up? He had so many questions and Ian had all the answers.

There was a knock on the door and Anthony looks up, not bothering to school his expression of annoyance when the door opens and he sees Ian poke his head into the room.

"Selina said you were looking for me?" Ian asks, as if it is not obvious, as if he didn't just blow Anthony off for three days.

"Can we talk?" Anthony says, more curt than he means to, "In your office?"

Ian swallows thickly, but he nods, swinging the door open and heading towards his office, Anthony trailing behind him.

They walk silently to Ian's office. Thankfully no one else happens to be around at the time as Ian holds open his office door to let Anthony pass through before he follows after, shutting the door behind him.

Ian stands nervously in the room, looking somewhat like a child who is about to be scolded.

"Look-" Ian starts with a sigh.

"I thought we were going to be better with this whole communication thing," Anthony says, cutting Ian off.

Ian blinks at the razor sharp tone of Anthony's voice.

"I'm sorry, I just didn't think it was a conversation we should have over text. I didn't even know if you wanted to talk about it or just pretend it never happened."

"Of course I want to talk about it! You were making out with an employee of ours!"

"I-" Ian falters, "I know there's, like, dynamic shit, but it isn't weird really. Shayne was the one that asked me out and it's been almost a year."

Anthony's heart drops to his feet. Almost a year? Anthony and Ian had reconnected about ten months ago. All this time, all this rebuilding of their friendship and Ian had said nothing about the fact that he was dating Shayne?

Jealousy seeps into Anthony, feeling like it's choking him. His best friend, Ian, had hid something so big from him. They were supposed to be open and honest with each other and already Ian was keeping secrets.

"I'm so fucking pissed!" Anthony snaps, he watches Ian flinch. "I can't believe you didn't tell me!"

Ian scoffs, "Sorry, I didn't realize I have to tell you when I'm dating someone."

"Maybe when it's someone who works for us?" Anthony bites back, "Is he the first or have you been hooking up with other employees?" Anthony snipes.

A wounded look crosses Ian's face, "It isn't like that. I...I know it sounds fucked up because I'm technically his boss, but I lov-"

"Stop," Anthony says, verging on desperate, "I don't want to hear it."

"Look," Ian starts, stepping closer to Anthony. The older of the two feeling like he wants to cry. He's angry at Ian, he's hurt, he's sad, and jealous, all this poisonous feelings creating a storm in his body. He wants to leave, he wants to be as far away from here as he can be, but what would that do? It would be like before, when they ran from conflict instead of talking about it, but this topic, Shayne and Ian, it is the last thing Anthony wants to hear.

"I'm sorry. I should have told you. I just...he and I started kind of dating right when you and I reconnected and everything was new on both sides. I didn't want to rock the boat either way, so I kept it from you, until I knew where things might fall with Shayne."

Anthony closes his eyes, "And now?"

"We're good," Ian says, softly. Anthony feels like he's been punched in the gut, "he makes me happy, Anthony."

Happy. Ian deserves to be happy.

Ian steps closer, his hand seeking out Anthony's shoulder.

"I want us to be okay too, Anthony."

Anthony squeezes his eyes shut tighter, takes a deep breath, then he nods, looking at his best friend, the most important person in his life. He swallows past the thick rope of jealous that feels like it's strangling him.

"We are...we will be," He admits, "I just, I want you to tell me things."

Ian nods, "I'm sorry."

Anthony, he loves Ian, he does, probably too much judging by the pain that ricochets through him. He loves Ian and he wants Ian to be happy. Who is he to complain? He left. He gave opportunity for Shayne to grow closer to Ian. He wasn't there and Shayne was. He has no one to blame but himself.

"I forgive you," Anthony says carefully. He touches Ian's elbow and watches his best friend smile in response. "And I'm glad you're happy."

[fantasy-drawings-ra]

Here are some miscellaneous drawings I’ve made months ago and forgot to post here.

Sketches Descriptions in order:

Desmond Sycamore sitting contemplatively with his right hand under the side of his chin. Whilst looking to his left. He is also in a different outfit because I like practicing new outfits with him seeing as I draw him the most.

Second is Qifrey standing in a 3/4 angle and the drawing is a little passed his knees. He has his left hand over his heart and his right outstretched to the side he is looking in is flowy robe and hat.

Third is one page of two of a Brewster comic I’m working on in digital right now, though panel 2 and 3 are swapped. I got the idea after logging in when I haven’t got to play in a while and thought of this comic based on his response.

Fourth is my attempt at Link in his new Tears of the Kingdom design. With his hair flowing his his face is in a side profile looking over his shoulder to the right with his left hand (our right is outstretched slightly to catch the tear gem and his right arm at his side. (Side note: I drew this before playing the game.)

Fifth is Elaine from The Blind Prince webtoon (which is so good and gets me excited every Tuesday evening to go read) she is looking to the left side profile shot clasping her hands forward. Looking surprised yet hopeful. (This probably is my favourite of the sketches because I think it was the one that turn out the best.)

Sixth slide is Queen Sonia from Tears of the Kingdom looking to the right with a smiling expression with her hands outstretch forward to match the Rauru drawing in the third slide. (Insert a ‘I just think they’re neat!’ Meme here)

Seventh slide is Rauru from Tears of the Kingdom looking to the left in a side profile to Sonia with a smile on his face and hands also outstretched. Both Sonia and Rauru’s I feel could be better but I drew them at night when I felt the drive to draw even though I had little energy to apply it to. Hopefully if I do get to draw them in digital it will hopefully be better.

[polychromaddict]

My toxic trait is that I’ll doodle for like 3 different fandoms in the same drawing file and still post them together because I’m lazy. These are from months ago but I totally forgot to post them whoops.

Here we have 2 drawings of Marina from and 1 of Pearl Splatoon because I love lesbians.

A doodle of Nobara from JJK which I made while binge watching it.

A sketch of Ryunos Akutagawa because while I love him I just cannot figure out how to draw his I’m soooorrrry.

Also we have some Eniale and Dewiela yuri because I love them.

Edit: Im sorry I tried to schedule it to post later but it didn’t work aaaaaaa

[acourtoflostandwanderingstars]

Shackled from Truth: A Fragile Game

Chapter 2: Unexpected Changes Make for a Clear Road to Disaster

(Notes: I realized I entirely forgot to post chapter 2 on here…so here you go! It’s been up on AO3 for a while, so this isn’t anything new for those of you who came from there, sorry…)

Rating: (M)ature

Warning(s): Violence, language, murder, gore. Viewer discretion advised! If this triggers you, please move on!

Pairing(s): Wingdings Gaster/Original Female Character (kinda reader)

Skye shifted her weight to her other foot, swallowing nervously. She had been diligently sucking up to every higher up she could in Vital’s gang, and just last week she’d received a letter. The angry, red wax seal had glared up at her, as if promising as much danger as an active case of dynamite. It was just an invitation to meet the man himself. Adelphi. When Serenity had described it, she had made the plan sound so easy. But Skye had her doubts. One wrong move and both her own and Daji’s life would be at stake. Her nerves had flared, eating away at her insides, ever since she laid eyes on that ominous letter, like a hot iron branding her mind, her eyes.

     “Ms. Cohen?” The metal door scraped against the concrete floor, its weight dragging it down.  “Skye Cohen?” The girl barely processed the man’s question as the words ‘reinforced metal’ echoed through her head. 

     Finally, the words reached her, pulling her out of the anxious fog her mind was in. “Oh, um, yes! That’s…that’s me.” She swallowed, glancing into the room offered to her by a muscular, well-trained butler. The lions den, a place to be left alone. Yet here she was, preparing to let the stiff darkness of the room swallow her. She took a step forward, her body stiff.

     The sight inside surprised her. She found an older man, holding a cigar, sitting at a desk bathed in multi-colored light. A stained glass window proudly stood from the floor to the ceiling, illuminating the room in a gentle, muted rainbow of colors. The man at the desk looked grizzled on the outside, but his eyes revealed overwhelming weariness, almost gentle. That’s when a lone picture frame caught the young woman’s attention. It was a man, different than the pale individual in front of her. This picture displayed one of chocolate skin, bright blue eyes, and thick hair that was dark at the roots but blonde at the tips. 

     “Skye Cohen. You joined my gang but three months ago, no?” Adelphi Vital’s slight British accent caught her attention.

     Skye nodded, avoiding eye contact. She was worried he was going to question allegiances, and she’d never been too good at lying. Her front often broke the second the other person showed a hint of moral, the slightest bit of character, of weakness.

     “Well, Ms. Cohen, I have some good news.” The man leaned forward in his chair. “I’ve heard about the loyalty you’ve shown to me. And I want to reward you.”

     Skye’s head shot up. Reward? That wasn’t what she had expected — not at all. “I-oh! Um, thank you, sir.”

     Adelphi tilted his head toward the girl. “I have decided to promote you to Lieutenant, head of my infiltration and investigation branches. I would like you to do my spy work.”

     Skye’s breath left her in a moment of mind-numbing shock. This was exactly what Chikai had predicted. Of course, Skye was particularly talented in the delicate art of disguising herself, able to slip through the shadows where no one else noticed her — it was the very job she was doing now. But Chikai’s estimate had been on the dot, down to the week the promotion was in. Regaining her composure, Skye tilted her head downwards to avoid suspicion, masking her nervousness as excited shock. “T-thank you, sir.”

     “Of course! And, if you’re up to it, I have a job for you.” The man began shuffling through papers scattered on the wooden desk. Various papers fell to the ground, and Skye caught sight of several charcoal sketches that portrayed the same ruggedly handsome man in the picture frame on the desk.

     “Of course, sir.” Skye tilted her head at the picture frame. “Oh, and Mr. Vital, sir?”

     The man hummed in response.

     “Who’s the man in the picture frame?”

     Adelphi froze, shocked by the question. He slowly picked up the picture and stared at it, lost in memory. “He was my husband. We had been married for thirty-five years. And then he was kidnapped, and shot.”

     Skye blinked, her heart going out to Vital. “Th-that’s terrible.”

     Adelphi nodded. “After I disposed of the gang who did it, I learned to never take for granted what I have, what I care about. Many of the other gangs see it as ‘going soft’, but I lost so much more than a spouse that day. When I watched them shoot him, beyond that glass barrier, I felt like my very SOUL shattered, and I couldn’t do anything to help it.” A few tears fell onto the worn frame.

     Skye lowered her head in solemnity. Although many humans doubted it, his SOUL probably did shatter. It sounds like he had lost his SOULmate. 

     The man shook himself out of the fog. “Right. Well, enough about me. I have given a piece of property to Wingding’s Gaster, head of the Serif family. I want you to move into one of the apartments there and keep an eye on him. I don’t need my spot being uprooted anytime soon. That would open our precious city to weaknesses.” Adelphi pushes a pawn, which was sitting on a stack of papers in front of him, over. A dark look crossed his eyes. “Are you up for it, Lieutenant?”

     Skye swallowed, flinching at the nickname. “Y-yes sir.” She would have to find a way to report to Chikai about this. Being right under Wingding’s nose would complicate things. It might endanger her whole gang.

     Adelphi turned towards the window, observing the way the light danced across the stained panes. “And I’m sure you won’t mind the extra security I have assigned for you. It’s just precautionary. I can’t have my spy being killed, or worse, betray me.” He shot a dark glance at Skye, and her heart stopped for a dangerous moment.

     “I-of course not, sir. Th-that would never happen.” She glanced down, trying to lie through her teeth. He couldn’t know. Could he? 

     “Oh don’t worry, I’m not making this unpleasant. I noticed how close you have grown to a few of my other recruits.” Vital snaps his fingers, and in step two figures. One is a stout, broad man, a scar tearing down the left side of his head. His demeanor was threatening, his eyes mischievous. It was Griffin, one of Vital’s muscle men. The other was a familiar face. The woman, blinded in one shocking, icy blue eye, was tall and muscular. This was Daji, a member of Serenity’s family. She had joined Adelphi months earlier than Skye as a precaution. Now she stared coldly in front of her, not making eye contact with the quivering Skye.

     Vital raised his hand. “Go. Your assignment starts next week. Your guides will escort you.”

     Serenity bolted awake, a cold sweat sticking to her skin, her heart racing, her breathing heavy. She sat in the cold darkness of her room for a moment before pulling her knees to her chest, resting her forehead on them. Something was wrong — terribly wrong. 

     Swinging her legs over the side of her bed and sitting up, she felt the room spin. The lack of sleep was catching up to her, the delicate plan feeling as though it weighed more than a ton on her shoulders. Serenity rubbed her eyes and stood up, picking her way through the room to flip on the light switch. Her head pulsed as soon as the bright light flooded the small space.

     Compared to a week ago, her snug apartment was cluttered. Papers filled with names, some crossed off in red, others with marks next to them, drifted down to the floor and sprawled across her desk. One instant ramen container, still half full, stood on the counter, abandoned.  Serenity grabbed her stomach as is groaned uncomfortably — hungry yet queasy. It would be easier to just not eat today. Besides,  today was ever so important.

     Today was the day she would finally meet her landlord and the overseer. The woman pulled on her inconspicuous newsboy outfit, and checked the mirror. Content, she made her way towards the door. She didn’t forget — hell, she couldn’t forget — that today was also when Zara had promised a status report, something Serenity was terribly anxious to receive. 

     Opening the rundown door, Serenity exited the apartment. After rubbing her newspaper rounds, she made her way back to the community park that was in front of her temporary home. It was run down — rusty swing sets that creaked as they swayed in the wind, a slide that dangled off its anchor, and a rock climbing wall covered in blood and vandalism. A dried flower bed that was overflowing with weeds had become the stray cats’ litter box, and the crisp air made Serenity pull her coat closer to her form.

     After sitting down on one of the swings, Serenity began feeding the cats. They flocked to her, drawing the attention of some neighborhood kids that were playing hopscotch on the sidewalk. Parents, who had come home from work early to meet the new  landlord, dawdled outside. Some made angry phone calls, others sat quietly and read. Some just stared at their feet. This meeting could make or break this neighborhood, and many had already lost hope.

     Wingdings sighed. “Alright, Papyrus, you have absolutely everything memorized? No surprise add-ons this time around?”

     The tall skeleton shifted in his seat. “DON’ WORRY ‘BOUT IT, BOSS. I’L STICK T’THE SCRIPT.”

     The car holding the three skeleton brothers rounded a corner. Immediately, Sans slammed on the break, yelling loud profanity’s at the bicyclist who had pulled out in front of them. 

     “fucking kid!! need ta watch where they’re goin’.” Sans grumbled, righting the steering wheel and continuing towards the job site.

     “Patience, Sans. It’s probably a neighborhood resident. And we have to treat them with utmost respect. Remember the plan.”

     Silence fell over the car. The plan. Months of careful planning, endless hours of trying patience. To mess up now would cost the Serif Family a good chunk of their territory, and that would set them back years. The rest of the ride was spent in contemplative silence, the air thick and tense as possibilities were weighed and scripts reviewed.

     Serenity glanced around, searching the crowd for signs of Zara. She was supposed to meet her half an hour before the meet and greet, and she was already five minutes late.

     Finally, Serenity caught sight of a purple-streaked head of hair. Zara bounded up and pulled Serenity into a hug. 

     While they were hugging, Zara whispered. “There’s been a glitch. Something big.”

     Serenity pulled back and furrowed her brow in concern. “What?”

     “Skye’s been promoted, just like Chikai predicted. But Adelphi put her directly on a job.” Zara took a deep breath, exhausted from her run to the complex.

     Before she had the chance to finish, Serenity caught sight of a familiar face tying up her bicycle. Was that…Skye? A swell of fear grew in Serenity’s chest as Zara continued her report.

     “Adelphi sold some land to W.D., and she’s been directed to move in so she can keep an eye on him. She was rehoused to the location today.” 

     The girl by the bicycle turned to face the crowd, and Serenity’s suspicion was confirmed. Color draining out of her face, Serenity grabbed Zara’s shoulder and asked a question again. “You said you were sure this was Vital’s territory, right?” 

     Zara nodded. “Yes, why?”

     Suddenly, an engine revved, and an expensive looking sports car parked by the curb. The crowd stood alert, and the doors opened. Three figures stepped out, and collective gasps were heard throughout the throng. Serenity felt her head spin and her stomach clench at the sight.

     There stood the Gaster brothers, the heart of the Serif Family. The Golden Head, WingDings Gaster himself, was the new landlord. Serenity felt bile rise in her throat and she almost gagged. This would put a hiccup in the plan. A big hiccup. And now another one of her gang members was wrapped into this situation. 

     The world spun, and Serenity wretched, covering her mouth and moving to the side. Zara stood, dumbfounded, as she watched the Serif brothers begin their speech. 

     Serenity’s already empty stomach cleared what was left in it on the ground. Immediately, Wingdings glanced over. The pale woman caught his attention. The others were dumbfounded, but her shock seemed far worse. Narrowing his eyes, Wingdings turned back to the crowd and continued his recited lines.

     “And you don’t have to fear anymore, my good people. We will keep you and the rest of the city safe from parasites — from weaklings that try to worm their way in. Now, let’s set up a date to have a community meeting regarding your protection fees…”

     Serenity shook, weak from a second earlier, and feeling as though that last statement was a threat. But the plan couldn’t just stop. It had to proceed, just with extra caution. She tapped Zara’s shoulder and nodded, and Zara grinned, satisfied, before retreating into an alleyway. She would spread the message. The plan must go on.

[pioneeroverc-my-5000th-sideblog]

Summary of April:

Was away at the beginning of the month and then when I got back got really unmotivated. I joined a Discord study check-in chat two weeks ago which helped get me back on track - hoping that my extreme competitiveness will help me at least get through the DAB stuff without giving up. I was really off track for finishing stuff, but I managed to pull it together in the end, and I think I actually managed to finish more of my monthly goals than I have in a really long time!

My drawing skill is kinda all over the place atm, which I'm hoping means it's going to consolidate itself into something better soon xD

Plan from April:

3x 100 comp ✗ forgot to do two of these AGAIN

5x scared ✓ didn't technically do 5 but they were longer than 5min anyway

DAB Lesson 7 - 2 vehicles ✓ YEAHHHH

Proko - shoulder bones ✓

DrawThis - 2x 2h videos ✓

Rough sketches for all 5 FEH alt ideas ✗

1x background sketch/screencap study (1h timer) ✓ well I drew over a bunch of rooms and discovered that I can't do it in an hour

1x simple form studies (1h timer) ✗ did do some form studies though not 1h

Look at how FEH artists handle small details/trims with lineart ✓

May plan:

at least one day/week playing games (not art but important to relax with)

Draw May 4th/5th pieces

Rough (pose) sketches for all 4 FEH alt ideas and finish current one before 8th

10x scared

4x 100 comp

Proko - review notes + watch shoulder critiques

Proko - pecs and breasts I guess

4x Ges Draw Party

DAB Lesson 7 - 4 vehicles

1x master study - comic background or screencap study with perspective

notes and improvements from finished stuff:

USE PHOTO REFERENCE FOR EXPRESSIONS and try more open mouths ✗ did expressions but not referenced, do more hair studies ✗, use photo reference to figure out stylised ¾ eyes AND NOSE ✓, push unhorizontalness ✓, see how other (FEH) artists handle trims ✓

5MIN SCARED IDEAS: find good hair examples and trace ✗, find ¾ photos and trace eyes/nose ✓, trace torsos for gesture ✗, review/learn leg muscles ✗, trace thigh high boot opening contours from actual photos ✓

knoll: not detailed enough (did a drawover to add details which made a BIG difference), hand unintentionally too wide, browbone doesn't go in to lead into cheekbone

h/ux: not enough ribcage space, crop looks like his forearm is just really thin, eyes aren't in perspective (not lined up + eye area is a bit too wide and flat), hand wasn't referenced and it shows

elan: values too close, REALLY BAD HAND, antennae shouldn't be that swivelled, folds don't make any sense

t/ana: tried to do too much of a dynamic pose and made an unnatural twist between upper + lower halves, eyes aren't looking at viewer, arm holding bouquet/shoulder/underarm area is flat and too far off to the side, lighting not consistent + shading on skirt too conservative (should have pushed the back of it way further into shadow to bring out the roundness), sash thing has no texture and is placed really awkwardly because I realised during the colouring phase that the entire skirt was off-centre, value contrast too low (not engaging to look at). HOWEVER I did try to clean up my lines AND shading at the end, and also used a much smaller brush (doubled canvas size to A4 and used a 3px/1px brush) so it looks a lot neater overall

ACTIONABLES: USE PHOTO REFERENCE FOR EXPRESSIONS!!!!! JUST DO IT, do hair studies, decide whether majority of piece is going to be dark or light and base contrast around that, draw out ribcages (+ shoulder bones) for every sketch, use photo/RL reference for EVERY HAND - even doodles, do a separate detail pass the day after 'finishing' something, use photo reference for folds

5MIN SCARED IDEAS: find good hair examples and trace, trace torsos for gesture, review/learn leg muscles, draw one hand, identify fold type in clothing photos

[volfoss]

Doll faceup/doll nudity under the cut 👍 this is a big project so word heavy

Dindrane, my poor Bobobie Apollo is in for his THIRD faceup because I just couldn't figure out the vibes of what I wanted to do with him until a day or two ago. I wanted to test how I could make burn scars seem realistic on a BJD, as I wanted to give him several, along with several scars on his body and head! This was in a way, preparing for my VERY big Frankenstein doll project, as I would be blushing that full doll in different colors with pastels. The mockup on this one was definitely a bit harder and I decided to not include it here for the fact that it would be way easier to just jump into the work!

First off, I used a watercolor pencil in burgundy to sketch out where I wanted my scars and a normal pencil to sketch the burns out. There's a LOT of spots I wanted the burns so I wanted to use a lighter color pencil but they weren't showing up on the resin at all 😭

^ first coat of blush (VERY faint. He's white resin so I have to do very pale colors unless I want it to overly stand out). The outlines are kinda hard to see here but they are definitely there!

Then I saw some peachy orange pastels I had mixed up for my last faceup on Theo, and realized that would be a perfect color for under the actual 3 dimensional burns I would be making later on. So I just jumped right into it, running out and then mixing up a color that I thought was the same but turned out to be more red. I would have to add more orange/peachy tones next layer.

^ not to Bob Ross here but I had a few happy accidents with this layer! My sealant had kind of been finicky in a couple places but really just added more texture/depth to the scar sites! You can definitely see where the burns are more vividly now! I obviously still have to do the regular faceup and the rest of it but so far so good! I keep the head right by to match with the body so I can really make sure that the scar is matching from the neck to the head. I had originally wanted to do something similar with Dindrane, with a scar instead of a burn but I feel that he is really coming together like this! A lot of the areas I'm not showing (ie the back) are still blushed but I can't go TOO picture heavy or I'll have to make this a 2 part post 👍

Next layer was adding more colors to the pastels, the method I use to seal (using a sponge on sealant) gives me really interesting edges when I do this so I'm really happy with again all the happy accidents of the pastels picking up on the sponge I'm using! When I switch to the rest of the faceup, I am definitely going to get a new sponge but for right now it creates a lot more natural edges on the burns imo!

I have the head and body separate here because they're drying (shocker i forgot to take a pic before sealing lol)

Burn is pretty much at the color I want! We did run into SOME technical issues with the eyebrows as you wouldn't guess that white pencil wouldn't show up on a white resin doll but it doesn't. So i had to paint the general shape on w acrylic paint lmao. They are BARELY visible but they're pretty even for what I'm working with rn! Next up is adding a lot of the really dramatic black eye makeup that he had before and then doing small burns and scars on the body! Also blushing the lips but I also might do a lipstick, it'll really just depend on how I'm feeling when I hit it 👍 the blushing is cracking a lot less in the joints than I expected which again is very good to know for my Frankenstein doll since 99% of the joints are going to be going through a similar treatment!

My favorite hobby is being like hmm ok this is where I'm going with this faceup ^-^ -> get into it and am like hmm. Ok whole different direction. This is definitely what happened here lmao. I had been struggling to pin this guy's character down for a month and while doing the eyebrows, it hit me fully and I knew what I wanted to do with this faceup! Which was a wonderful feeling tbh! So in my horribly terrible mistake fashion, I decided to do my acrylics and pastels on the same layer as I did NOT want to wait for it to dry and my inspo leave me in the meantime. This basically means I cannot make any mistake which is scary. Do not do this etc.

Brows still BARELY visible in pics but everything else turned out perfectly. By some FUCKING miracle my god. No clue how tho. So this now just leaves the burns and the scars, the latter of which I'm putting the red paint on rn bc i am um. Impatient so so bad lol. Very happy w this faceup tho like... It's him to me and that's a really good feeling :)

Realized the dark ass pencil was in fact a pain to cover up so mixed a kind of skin color paint with a tiny bit of my blood color to get a kinda middle shade between the skin and the scar which created a nice edge which will hopefully blend a bit better when I get to the glue and texture stage!

This is while it's still drying BUT. If it looks anywhere near this good when dry I'll be THRILLED. This worked way better than I expected and I am VERY glad I did such dark pastels under bc it set a really good foundation for the textured part of the burn! It's 7 am as I'm writing this and I am so so sleepy so I postponed the arm for another day but here's how the torso is looking! I'm letting it dry overnight, as well as the head and then will see if I need to do another coat tomorrow

^ very early on as I covered all the red on the torso but this pic shows it looking pretty dry so wanted to pick this one 👍

Faceup still drying here but. I added more definition to the scars on the body by doing another layer of glue + pastel and did the same on the face. Added piercings to him and it's basically all just waiting for a ton of it to dry now 👍

^ first pic is before the second coat but just showing how it all looked dry and second pic is faceup finished minus gloss! I will be posting finished pictures later but this was a BIG project so I hit max pic limit quickly. Obviously when I did the rest of the glue, I added the arm burns and the rest of the burns on the lower arms. I'm STILL not done with this body though. I need to do a lot of burns on the legs and add tattoos on the legs as well! This is definitely a very long project lol. The tattoo stuff is definitely going to wait for later because I have no clue what I want to do with him but this entire project has been a HUGE help with doing 3 dimensional modifications like this and it's going to be insanely helpful when I work on my Frankenstein body next. A lot of the techniques I used here are ones I will also use there so it should be pretty easy! Hopefully lmao.