#hey tumblr i still have a bunch of posts you still flagged

[koko2unite]

IT TOOK 2 WEEKS

[cyprozombiegirl]

Help a trans girl recover from tumblr’s institutional and systematic transmisogyny

hey folks, so tumblr nuked my account (cypro-girl) and deleted most of the posts I had depicting me dilating (aka doing a medical treatment to myself) or talking about the joys of bottom surgery. They left up the photos of me pre bottom surgery hard as a rock though 🤔. Anyways I’ve tracked down and saved as many of my former posts as I could but there are a bunch that might still be circulating, if you find any or have any already on your blog can you please please send them to me?

I suspect, given tumblr under Matt (I miss David) has been infamous for destroying any attempt by trans femmes to think/talk about our own bodies or oppression, and the fact that it had been primarily my posts about bottom surgery that have been removed from the site, that it was this positivity that got my blog (and backup blog) deleted. This is the second time I got nuked, my old blog cyproterone-girl has 23k followers when it got destroyed. I’d just built back up to 10k and thought I was safe cause I was being a lot more cautious. I had zero flagged posts and my blog wasn’t labeled as explicit, so this was tumblr escalating its epistemic violence against me from 0 to 100.

If you could please share this post so new people and past followers can find my new blog I would deeply appreciate it. I’ve appealed the deletion but I highly doubt tumblr will act in good faith and restore it. So for now this is my blog. I’m also sorta considering launching a class action lawsuit against tumblr but we’ll see if I want to devote the time and energy to doing so. I guess that depends on how much more tumblr pissed me off. They even deleted my gf’s main blog (steadfastcr0w) their damn poetry blog. So I’m pretty livid. I lost a passion project of mine, and feel like tumblr is forcing my exhibitionist self into sex work, cause they won’t let me post about my body for free like I want to (and I’ll be damned to hell if I start using reddit or X).

Anyways yeah, please share this!

[robbyykeene]

Hey, quick non-CK question - what do you mean you got in trouble for hoarding URLs?? I didn't even know that was a THING?

Yeah haha. Not sure how long you’ve been on tumblr, but back in the day (like 10-12+ years ago) hoarding URLs was a big thing, especially in fandom spaces. Basically the idea was that you create a bunch of inactive sideblogs to save a URL that you might want to use in the future. At this point in time, switching back and forth between URLs was also a lot more common. I think some people even used to sell their URLs, or trade other URLs for them which is crazy. There was an entire URL hoarding real estate. It was actually a huge problem lol, I remember wanting to enter certain fandom spaces but being unable to get a URL related to it. And back then I feel like fandoms were a little harder to breach into, especially if you didn’t have a blog that looked like it should belong there—or maybe I was just younger and didn’t know how to interact with people lol, but either way it was still frustrating.

However, Tumblr has since (not sure when exactly) banned URL hoarding. Idk what exactly they quantify as hoarding, but I did have at least a few dozen URLs saved from over a decade ago that I honestly didn’t even remember I had. Most of them were related to emo bands lmao. I think what happened in my case is that this sideblog got caught in the tumblr spam filter somehow, which is why for months I wasn’t able to reply to people and was bot having posts appear in the tags. A lot of people have been having problems with being incorrectly flagged as spam in the last couple years, due to the algorithms they use to detect potential spam accounts. The real problem is that once your account has been flagged tumblr doesn’t notify you or communicate the problem to you, so if you don’t know what to look for (which I didn’t) you don’t know how to properly report the problem. I contacted support a few times but because I reported it as a bug, I suspect it didn’t go to the right place. Eventually this led to my account being terminated without warning or notification. I reached out to tumblr support on multiple platforms, and I think when they looked into the issue they saw that I had a bunch of URLs hoarded and suspended my main account (but restored access to this one). I deleted all the saved URLs, emailed support back, and they released my main account back. All in all I’m just happy with how quickly they resolved the issue tbh, I know a lot of people have spent months trying to get a terminated/suspended account back so I feel pretty grateful. And honestly I think it’s good that tumblr enforces the ban on URL hoarding, bc I remember how upsetting it was being like 12 years old and unable to get a URL related to the thing I really cared about.

[moonnue]

It's recently been brought to my attention that people that are speaking out for me are being harassed. I'll be answering that persons ask below the cut as I don't want to fill people's feeds with more drama, but I do think it's important to discuss. There is also very helpful info on how to report on Ao3 if you have not done it before!

In any case, I strongly encourage that you block, report, and move on if someone tries to pester you about this. Be careful out there!

I am so, so sorry this has been happening to you. I just wrote a simple fanfic and it is baffling that something like this can come out of it. It really ain't that deep. I also agree with you! I can't believe the other writer and I are the same age like please i'm begging you to leave this childish behavior behind. It is so silly. We left this behind in high school.

Report Link: https://archiveofourown.org/abuse_reports/new

Thanks so much for your words of support and you're help. It truly means a lot to me. Again, I am so sorry you have gotten caught up in all this. Wishing you well! ♥

@softpastelqueer

Text version of images below:

Hey, sorry to bother you again (I know you want to move on from this), but I received a bunch of unhinged asks/harassment myself (including threats) both for supporting you/being against an obvious mass bullying campaign against you and for joking that Titanic must’ve also stolen from them. The Protag drawing Astarion really was done before both of y’all, so I’m staunchly with you there

Obviously, it’s ridiculous to claim the protag of stories being an artist drawing a character is akin to copy written intellectual property. It’s a really REALLY old idea and it’s genuinely ridiculous to claim ownership over that. Even more ridiculous to consider we’re all older adults. Shouldn’t we all be busy stretching so our lower backs won’t hurt??? Like c’mon guys this is silly

Furthermore, what’s even more ridiculous is to encourage harassment of others. Again, we’re somehow all adults? If their claims of plagiarism were provable beyond the vague hand waving away of now owning the entire concept of writing about artists drawing people, then why did they and their crowd harass me instead of trying to convince me? I am a rando who didn’t know either of you and actually found YOU through one of THEIR first posts spamming the BG3 tag with encouragements to others to “teach you plagiarism is not okay” aka harassment.

I am both an artist AND professional editor for novels, manuscripts, and the like. I was trained to spot real plagiarism. Not a single bit of your structure could be flagged as plagiarism beyond the same premise.

Now that that’s been said. They’re still harassing you (and me now I suppose) and so I recommend you and others to report them on AO3. They’ve created an AO3 post further encouraging harassing you and encouraging falsely reporting your story for plagiarism.

If you’ve never had to report anybody before, here’s what mine looks like

[IMAGE]

My full report says “This person (WanderingIsobel) has been targeting and harassing the other writer (MoonNue) and also encouraging other people to harass them and report their story under the claim it’s plagiarism to use the same generic story premise. Half of the harassment is on tumblr while the other half of the harassment is on here, AO3. The other writer has explained many times that they have never read their story and to please leave them alone, but now they made an entire AO3 post dedicated to encouraging people to report and “comment” aka harass them over a weird fake accusation. It’s making it hostile both for the writer of Portrait Of A Vampire and for readers in general.”

Link for the AO3 Reporting

But Holy shit I am so sorry you’re getting caught up in fandom unwellness the rest of tumblr makes fun of. Whatever you need, I’m here to help, including even venting. I am sorry You’re a victim of a mass harassment/bullying campaign.

[solyankapal]

Hey! I saw you leave a reply on a blazed post about bigoted staff at Tumblr! Could you point me in the right direction to learn more? I do not want to support a website with where money is going into bigoted pockets.

Hi there, I'm assuming good faith here and will say that the simple truth of it comes down to tumblr being a company with a company's motivations, it's not a friend and there is many posts on here by black users detailing the countless ways the runners of this website are virulently antiblack. People's money going into checkmarks and the blaze feature could and should be tangible help spent elsewhere

It unfortunately doesn't take long to identify how this website let's bigotry run rampant and I could give an ocean of examples at the top of my head so I'll list a few

Blaze posts get vetted before they're approved for publishing and there's been many instances of posts by terfs being allowed to spread fascist ideology. There's also been nudes by white people put on people's feeds via blaze whereas clothed, sfw pictures of black people have gotten flagged, blazed or not.

There's many, many Nazis on this website whose blogs are allowed to stay up (some of which have even ended up on my dashboard via the messy "based on your likes" function which has put a lot of dodgy shit on my feed but a military aesthetics blog by a Hungarian Nazi was by far the most enraging) while black people's accounts get suspended for nothing.

When people were posting about Ferguson the tag on here got suppressed and now tumblr changed its icon to a black woman and put 'black women, take care of your mental health' or something in a header banner which especially given this site's track record is beyond patronising garbage

I can't remember the details but there was also an instance of a user getting their account suspended specifically for talking about (talking about, not threatening mind you) the tumblr of an avowed harry potter fan staff member who's likely still part of running the website.

Tumblr has seen a 125% profit increase through blaze and checkmarks and a lot of people who search for a sense of identity in consumption believe using tumblr or giving money to tumblr over other websites is doing good when tumblr is just another cog in the wheel of capital that couldn't give less of a shit about people. Many people on here in dire need of mutual aid for survival are forced to see people having spent an exorbitant amount of money for a bunch of checkmark icons next to their usernames which literally says nothing other than "money was spent on these!!". If it's someone's joy to show how much money they've given to a website people should in fact take issue with that and interrogate where that need comes from. The checkmarks aren't a "funny dunk" on Musk's twitter takeover it's a profit margin a company saw and used successfully.

My legendary wife simply responds to blazed posts especially from users with checkmarks by long windedly talking about bowel movements for example which is infinitely funnier and probably more effective to discourage people from blazing their posts than my attempts to appeal to someone's sense of reason but who's to say lol

[joelwindows7]

@cardiomason shadow banned? Or they chose deactivated themselves?

Pls find last reblogs!

Edit, she / they back! See here

Next time bring Odysee with you okay? Ban bots are still buggy and spam bots are way smarter exploiting every patches.

Well it's possible that it wasn't spam ban. Chances are, a bunch of butholes convinced the AI moderator (mass flagging) that "you are not worthy of existence". Stuff like that.

Okay perhaps... they deactivate themselves, because.. oh pls..

I have posted this post URL to my website, here.

[letitrainathousandflames]

Hey sorry to bother. You reblogged something from Lychgate who has an nsfw Twitter (dickgate) where he posts a bunch of really graphic clonecest. He’s a know fetishizer of clones and clonecest.

I truly, dearly hope you reconsider supporting him.

Hi! Thank you for the warning. I don't "support" him or anyone, per se - I see art I like and reblog it. I'm sorry, but I'll have to do a small rant. Firstly: do I fall in the "fetishizer of clones" category? Because most of what I do here is ogle over them and write graphic smut of them with self-insert reader characters. Anyway, moving on:

When I reblog art from the small internet artists here, I'm not raising a flag or promoting them or anything, I'm just... slapping some pretty/cool/funny art on my blog bc I liked it, y'know? My reblog of some person's doodle doesn't - and shouldn't - mean an immediate display of my agreeing with everything this person says and thinks.

In fact, we share glimpses of each other's thoughts, headcanons, opinions with a reblog and we move on to the next one. I have mutuals who like all sorts of things I don't - soup, hiking, the brithish royalty, hunting. I still reblog their stuff, and that doesn't mean our opinions on those topics align.

Of course, I'm always grateful for warnings about me accidentally rebbloging content from a terf/nazi/homophobe/pedophile/scammer, etc, etc. because then I can erase said post and report the user who made it to try make Tumblr a safer community. Disagreeing on whether soup is good isn't the same as disagreeing on lgbt rights.

But when it comes to shipping... man, I don't really care, y'know? Since the clones are all adults, this falls to me in the "ship and let ship" category, and I really lack the mental energy to get into the whole debate of what artist is writing/drawing what about people who, at the end of the day, are still nothing but [adult] fictional characters.

Because here's the deal: who really cares about how or with whom these characters are being shipped? "The children"? They shouldn't be looking at art marked as 18+ in an account that says "no minors". People (like myself) with squicks/triggers/traumas? Tags and blocking systems exist precisely to aid you with that. I use them and I love it. People that Don't Like that ship and want everyone to stop shipping it because they said so? Tags and blocking, again.

I didn't mean to soapbox on your ask, anon, and I'm not even defending Lychgate here bc I don't really care enough about him or this debate to do so tbh.

But I want to emphasize that I only appreciate these kind of warnings when they are about serious, actively damaging stuff, like me accidentally spreading crypto-terf posts bc they're disguised as feminism, or me having some creepy teen groomer's pokemon content on my blog bc they made a funny joke.

I know your intentions are good, but shipping discourse of adult ships is, in my particular opinion, not that important. I don't even ship clones, nor do I care when I see works in which they are shipped. I'm just... detached enough to see they are fictional characters that anyone can get to play with in their own sandbox the way they see fit, and that's none of my business.

That's my stance on adult ships of - and I repeat it - fictional characters. Again, this is not a dig at you or any other person squicked/triggered by clone shipping, nor is a pro clone shipping post. In fact, I'm not pro or against anything when it comes to adult ships - i'm over 30 and way too tired to be screaming about any of this anymore as I did in my teens. Now I just wanna sit here and vibe.

Thanks for the heads-up, and for the opportunity for me to talk about this. Please understand that I mean all of this in the most polite and cordial manner, and expect the same in any further communication between us that may follow. Good night and have a great rest of week.

[pendragyn]

Hey, I know this is literally out of the blue but im asking for some emergency help for my cats current situation. Please boost/share it for us so that we could get some traction or it could reach more people. I understand if its not okay, so sorry for taking some of your time and I wish you to be safe and healthy, xx.(Please considering answering my ask privately or probably send me a msg! 😭🙏

look drcember, not to be mean but a blog that only came into existence 15 hours ago, reblogged a bunch of random fandom and cat stuff then suddenly has a cat emergency that needs a reblog and a private reply screams scam in every way conceivable.

But hey, you followed me 2 seconds before sending the message so kudos for trying to negate that massive red flag?

If by some miraculous chance you aren't a scammer then you should know this entire setup has ensured that everyone is going to assume that you are.

For folks new to tumblr, begging for help for a sick pet/family member is an unfortunately common scam that goes around frequently, and is why I don't reblog donation posts from randos. I highly recommend being exceedingly wary of anyone begging in your inbox.

Elodiunderglass and Vaspider have both done excellent posts on how to spot scams, but let me reiterate; there is no cat/dog/bird/sibling/child/parent/grandparent/etc, especially if;

🚩 Their blog only just popped into existence in the past few days - so no way to know what kind of person they are or if they even have the thing they're claiming they need money to save.

🚩 They don't or just started following you - meaning they found your name randomly and just decided to message you out of the blue. Why? Well, have you donated or reblogged a charity post? Did something you post go viral? Are you a mutual with people who go viral on a regular basis?

🚩 They ask for a private response to their message, but want you to publicly reblog their charity posts. This gives them and the post an air of legitimacy, that you found the post on your own (meaning you follow them) and decided it was valid enough to pass on to your followers.

Inconsistencies in their stories/posts might be minor but are huge red flags. A few examples: 🚩 being very vague about the issue but insisting it is an urgent emergency, 🚩 not using the name of the pet/person in the post, 🚩 they'll say you can send money directly to the caregivers but then only give you their personal donation links, 🚩 not having any mention of the creature/issue on their blog before the sudden need for a large sum of money.

and recognize that they have probably sent this same message to a ton of other random, viral/charity post people at the same time. 🚩🚩🚩

It's okay to be wary and not engage with those you feel are trying to scam you. If you're really worried, reverse image search the "proof" and the paypal/cashapp links. Are there other posts on other blogs with the same links but different names/causes? Are there posts on other sites about the issue but with completely different links? All confirmations of scamming.

Even if there's nothing concrete, you're still allowed to say no. Even if it's a real need! You are not obligated to donate to random strangers on the internet, please don't let anyone convince you that you are.

Save your time and money by being generous with your friends and family and local causes, or actual charities like food banks, doctors without borders, local shelters, etc.

[infiniteglitterfall]

okay first of all, the Tumblr myth that saying the emotional abuse you're receiving made you suicidal is a guilt trip? we need to burn that to the ground.

that's bog-standard DARVO: pushing someone till they snap, then acting as if their reaction to abuse is what's actually abusive.

The accessibility analogy doesn't apply here, because if an employee's job is to go through customer feedback, they are in customer service and/or tech support. They can't change the ad department policies, or the code that affects accessibility, or the blacklisted tags.

In the analogy, it would be as if you changed your blog and someone else asked people what they thought, and then everyone screamed at them to fix it and told them they were garbage.

But also... if you made your blog really inaccessible, it still wouldn't be okay to be shitty to you.

It might be understandable. We all reach a breaking point sometimes with things like, idk, the entire world being deliberately or accidentally set up to constantly reject us and make us feel like we shouldn't even exist.

It's just that "it's understandable to snap and lash out at someone for subjecting us to the latest example of that" isn't the same as "it's okay to lash out at them."

Emotional abuse is really fucking rampant. I think most of us grow up minimizing it whenever it happens to us, and blaming and guilt-tripping ourselves for even experiencing it. Not to mention for its effects on us.

Which makes it really, really common to feel like it shouldn't harm others. Like whatever we're saying to them, however we say it, is their problem, and they should just suck it up and deal with it. And like it's a valid, useful tool in general.

Which is why the notes on this post are absolutely full of people minimizing suicide, suicidality, and emotional abuse. And generally assuming that nothing we're sending has been that bad, but that it wouldn't really matter if it were.

Personal fave:

Hey, everybody! If you've never experienced the magic of Tumblr users dogpiling on someone with absolutely foul personal attacks, good!!

Just step aside! Recognize that you don't have the experience to form a judgment about the likelihood that a staff member who has to read feedback from angry Tumblr users is reading things awful enough to make them suicidal!

Instead, the entire collective vibe in the notes is, "We should all say whatever we want to them: they're at fault, and they're the worst kind of people, and they're ignoring us."

And second: Tumblr staff are a bunch of different people with different jobs, different departments, and different levels of power.

I guarantee you that none of them know what any of the others are doing, much less have any say in it.

Evidently, some staff are transmisogynists. Clearly, the CEO is an ableist capitalist fool.

Some staff have the power to nuke blogs and blog posts. Some staff have the power to approve ads and/or set ad policies. We don't know exactly who.

People are acting like Tumblr is run by an anarchist co-op or something. Like all its employees collectively agreed to blacklist trans tags, make accessibility changes, etc.

This is a corporation. There are probably one or two people in one department who blacklisted trans tags and allow false flags.

There's probably some people in the advertising department who approved ads with flashing lights without a clue that it could be a problem. (Or out of denial, or malice.)

I guarantee that neither department knows what the other one is doing. Neither does anybody else in the company. And probably neither do the other people in their departments.

The CEO is the one setting the tone for the company.

He does not care if a staff member is suicidal.

He doesn't care much what the feedback says.

He definitely doesn't care if you go yell at staff members who are being rude or said this or did that.

Literally nothing would change, even if this post identified a transmisogynist on staff and everyone yelled at them personally.

Y'all. All the CEO cares about is:

(1) if a ton of people stop using Tumblr, and

(2) if Tumblr loses ad revenue. (And merch revenue - but only if that's a significant income stream.)

By all means, if you want Tumblr to change something, email the CEO and tell him that you aren't going to buy merch till it's fixed. (He's apparently done Q&As, but idk if there are any in the near future.)

Contact each advertiser and tell them what you have a problem with, and that you won't be purchasing from companies that advertise on Tumblr till it's fixed.

Don't waste your energy hoping the staff you know how to reach personally have the power to change the things you want changed!

tumblr staff have...

allowed false flags of 100% sfw posts made by transfem users (and blacklisted trans and trans adjacent tags) (edit: '#tgirl' is still blocked as of sept 11th, 2023)

taken away basic accessibility features in an effort to tiktok-ify tumblr

pushed tumblr live, a feature users actively dislike which is mostly unused and overrun by spambots, that also collects all of your data EDIT: see edit below, staff deleted all rbs of that post

allowed ads that can literally kill people via flashing / strobing lights, even if the person had it filtered, despite user complaints, with the ceo even saying people with epilepsy should "just buy ad free" in response to concern over potential death or serious injury from such ads

support/use kokobot, a bot for "mental health" that not only mines your data, but puts users in potentially dangerous and unsafe situations by having "advice" given by other users (including young children) not professionals

[NEW!] made tumblr live unsnoozable on mobile, ignoring backlash

[NEW!] a staff member is claiming that people leaving negative feedback is responsible for them being actively suicidal, an attempted guilt trip

[NEW!] more issues with staff, also has a list of staff members' personal blogs, also has staff @/cyle being weird and rude again

STOP GIVING THEM MONEY! stop trying to make crab day or whatever else happen. paying for stuff from the shop is rewarding them for ignoring the userbase continuously and doing things the majority don't want, even if the things they're doing and allowing can cause actual deaths. staff shouldn't be praised and get profit for ignoring their users in exchange for trying to turn tumblr into twitter 2 ft. tiktok. (and now going scorched earth when you criticize them). at this point i don't even care for "staff are people 🥺 be nice" arguments, because even when people are being very polite in feedback, they're perfectly fine ignoring it in exchange for implementing changes nobody wants (and now claiming negative feedback is responsible for them being suicidal).

leave bad reviews. don't buy things from the shop. send feedback, even if they never reply. email them and @ the staff, send asks to the wip blog. don't just blindly buy into "we need to support the site, buy xyz shop product", they don't deserve more money for giving a worse product.

edit: staff have gone scorched earth and removed Every Single RB of the post exposing the data harvesting of live, as well as deleting blogs iamdealwithit and partyjockers for bringing up valid points against staff and their policies (iadwi being the one who made the anti-live post).

archive.org and imgur links below the cut, since staff may possibly come after this post and its links as well.

post itself

false flags

trans/adjacent tags

accessibility features

tumblr live post (thanks for the link, @problemnyatic)

flashing / strobing / lights

unblockable flashing ad

buying ad free

staff @/macmanx guilt trip

list of staff + more issues

[goldenchan-fx2thepeacock]

Quick AU where Danny stays in town during Girls Night Out

Yeah, random thoughts spring into brain. Danny is trans. I think that's enough background info. Also, Tumblr got a new post editor, so I'm betaing it right now.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Danny was supposed to go fishing with his dad. But something came up. AKA, Vlad wanted him to go visit him without Danny. So Danny was in Amity Park when he was supposed to be having dad bonding time. What could he say? His dad got that dumb book and everything. It was gonna be epic. Except stupid Vlad had to go and ruin everything. Whatever. Dad said they would go next weekend.

The first big issue was when Tucker disappeared. And he didn't. Might've been a dumb ghost thing. So he and Sam went to find stuff out. Except all the men in town were gone. It was glaring. "I-I'm sure it's nothing Danny!" Sam said nervously. "Yeah. It's gotta have been a stupid mistake. Maybe I'm immune cause I'm half ghost," Except there weren't any male ghosts either. "Yeah, that's gotta be it!" That when they heard Ember. "OH YEAH! NO MORE PESKY GUYS! IT'S A GIRL'S NIGHT OUT!" "Yes. You know, I'm surprised that worked. I was afraid it might've been a ghost only thing," Spectra drawled. "Of course it worked. The superior gender always prevails," Kitty replied. "And that's obviously female," Every vein in his body was pounding. "I think you might've confused sex for gender ladies," Sam said patiently. "We're not having sex!" Ember laughed. "You do realize how invalidating this can feel for trans people?!" Sam shrieked back. "If they're still here, that means it's a she," Spectra grinned. That was the last straw. He ran. As fast as he could. And for a half ghost that was fast. Once he got home, he slammed the door.

Sam saw Danny run off and knew how this was looking for him. "Isn't this rich? The ghost boy is really a girl," Kitty grinned. "I'm surprised I didn't notice sooner," Spectra laughed. Ember stayed oddly quiet for someone who was normally boisterously loud.

Danny curled in on himself. Herself. NO! Don't second guess yourself. It change the fact that it hurt. "All the men in town are gone!" He heard Jazz yell. "I realize that Jazz. Thank goodness your father is out of town," Mom sighed. "Wait, but Danny isn't! I really hope..." She was standing in his doorway. "FUCKING GHOSTS!" Jazz didn't swear. She never swore. "What is it Jazz? Oh. Danny, I'm so sorry," Mom pulled him into a hug. "I'll be fine," He grumbled. "Do you know which ghosts?" Jazz decided to change the conversation. "Spectra, Kitty and Ember," "Great. Spectra is going to use this horribly," Jazz grumbled quiet enough that only Danny could hear. "Listen, we have to get the guys back first," "Wait, if you're, that means any trans women in Amity are stuck there," Mom said. "Can we not talk about that? I'm seriously not in the mood," "At least pesky Phantom won't be here to get in the way," Jazz and Danny exchanged a look. Sam came bursting in. "Danny! Okay, I am going to make them even deader than before," Sam cracked her knuckles. "I'm fine Sam. Let's just find a way to fix this," "I have an idea!" Jazz said. "No," Danny, Sam and Mom said in unison. "Oh come on. Don't be like that. Not all my plans are bad," Jazz protested. "Speaking from experience (of being trapped in a thermos way too much for one night), that is completely untrue," "What was that about thermoses Danny?" Mom said. "Jazz put soup in my Fenton Thermos!" "I couldn't tell them apart! We really need to label things," "Like with a massive sticker that say Fenton?" "All our stuff has those!" "Fair enough," Danny conceded. It was the plan if anyone caught them talking about getting trapped in thermoses. It made sense because it actually happened. "Well, since Jazz's plan is out, I opt that we figure out how this whole thing happened," Mom said. "It's a combo between Kitty and Ember. Kitty has this thing that makes men disappear into another dimension. And Ember must've used her guitar to make it cover all of Amity. If we don't get them out in twelve hours, they'll be stuck there forever," "And I will have to resign to a life of raging dysphoria," "You were gonna have that anyways," "Times ten. This won't help anyways, but it won't be all bad," "Let's stop talking about you being trans. Danny, you're staying here," Jazz winked. He knew what that meant. They would get all the men back and Danny would keep the ghosts at bay. "Okay. So, from what they were blabbing, all we have to do is get them to do it again," Sam said. Once they had a plan in place, all they had to do was implement it. They left and Danny quickly transformed. Praying that Spectra wouldn't find a way to use this against him, he sped off. "Hey! Poo faces! I'm not gone, and it semi pisses me off!" He screamed. "Oh now sweety. Why would you want to leave behind the superior gender?" Spectra said. "Because it makes me feel horrible and like I was born wrong," "You were, weren't you," Don't let Spectra sink her claws in Fenturd! "Yeah, maybe I was, but if I work hard enough I can fix it," "How is Danny Phantom still here?" He heard Paulina say. Nope, not listening. "They're all going to know. You can't do anything about that," Spectra laughed evilly. "Now girls, follow the recipe! You too now," "I'm. NOT A GIRL!" The wail was probably ill planned, but Danny wasn't thinking straight. Shit, humans. He cut himself off. "Oh come on now. No matter how many times you tell yourself that, you still have to cover parts of yourself. Don't tell me you don't wake up every morning and wish you were a real boy?" "I am. I am a real boy. I just have to take a few extra steps to get there," "Oh come on now. Stop lying to yourself. Maddie, how can you possibly call these eggs? They're green," Okay, maybe dealing with Spectra first was a bad idea. But she was also taunting his mom. Deal with Ember. She must be better than this.

So he flew to a stage. Ember was rocking out with a bunch of girls. Sam was in the background. This was probably one of the less dangerous problems. "Listen, if you're going to taunt me for the fact that I'm still here, do it already," "Hey, listen kid. I'm not actually going to taunt you. Kitty and Spectra are being complete jerks, but I'm not going to judge you for being trans," "Y-you're not?" "Heck no! I'm doing this because I wanted to have a fun night without guys. You included. I'll just have to take a few extra steps to get rid of you!" Danny dodged the guitar strum easily. "Are you planning on bringing them back at the end of the night?" "That's really up to Kitty," "I guess," Sam could deal with Ember.

Next up was Kitty. Oh great, makeup. (I honestly forget what Kitty was doing, so makeup works) "Now girls. All you gotta do is apply the bronzer like so!" "Kitty! How would Johnny feel if he knew you were doing this?" "Oh come on now Ghost girl, you can't be serious. Johnny is having a guys night in all due time," "HEY! Don't you dare. Transphobia doesn't help anyone," Jazz yelled. "Oh stop complaining. She knows she doesn't belong with the guys. From the looks of it, Spectra's already gotten to you. This'll make this so much easier,"

The plan backfired immensely. Danny and Mom were a mess, Sam didn't manage to get the guitar, and Jazz just got in a debate with Kitty. Danny, having to keep up a facade, came downstairs. "How'd it go?" "Terribly. Though, I did learn the Ghost Boy is trans," Mom said. "Fascinating," "It's, well it's oddly human. Why would a ghost even bother?" "Turns out gender dysphoria comes to the grave," "Danny, this is no time for one of your morbid jokes," Yeah, maybe it was morbid, but it wasn't a joke. "Whatever. I guess we get to use Jazz's plan," "All we gotta do is convince them that a cis guy is still in town. Like wandered in after the disappearing act," "Great plan. Sam can't pretend to be me though," "How did you know I was going to do that?" "Lucky guess,"

So that's how Jazz ended up wearing a baseball cap and a pair of men's jeans into Ember's concert. "Did we really have to use a pair of dad's jeans? These barely fit," "You know, the fact that they fit at all should be surprising. Dad was skinny at one point in his life. Which means that one of us could be on his end of the gene pool," "It's probably you," "Don't make me think about that. Hiding what little chest I have is hard enough. If I got dad's genes, I'd honestly be terrified," "We haven't seen the women on his side of the family. And besides, you got the blue eyes black hair thing," "You are honestly scaring me. Now, I gotta scram before someone sees me talking to you. Mom or the ghosts," "Fair,"

And thus, the plan worked. Kitty, adamant that no men be left in Amity, blew another kiss. Ember amplified it. The men came back. The three got thermosed. Jazz laughed at their faces when they honestly though she was from out of town. Danny once again didn't get taken, even in ghost form.

Tucker and Sam found him curled up in his bed. "Hey man. I know this has gotta be tough for you," Tucker said. "Spectra had no right!" Sam continued. "Thanks guys. But I think I'm gonna take a few days off school," The trio heard Dash's voice outside. "Hey mom. I know what happened was scary. And I know it must've felt really bad, but I still see you as my mom," "Thanks Dash. I can always count on you to make me feel better," A woman's voice rang out. Danny looked over the window sill. "See Danny. It's not horribly weird. Just a few transphobic ghosts," Tucker laughed. "A couple," "What?" Sam and Tucker said in unison. "Ember isn't," "How do you know that?" "I talked to her," "Hey Fenturd! Don't you dare tell anyone about my mom! And don't be mean to her! I'm sure you wouldn't get it," "You'd be surprised Dash!" He grabbed his trans flag and hung it out the window. "I get it more than you seem to think!" Dash's mom smiled at him. "Y-you're trans? I thought you were just a loser!" "Yeah, and I had to talk to the transphobic ghosts. So I won't invalidate your mom!" Dash stared up at him. "Holy shit,"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Praying that this uploads, cause I've got shoddy internet rn. And I'm working on my Gravity Falls crossover fic. I just had this pop into my mind. Prolly just gonna be a oneshot. I might make another fic about Jack's side of the family later, that's connected to this one.

[duhragonball]

Disinterpretation

I finally finished the Sarah Z video about “pro vs. anti”.   It’s pretty long, and I ended up watching it in chunks over several days, but I think it’s worth watching, especially if you’re sort of partially connected to online fandom, but not enough to be aware of all the lingo. 

As I expected, the whole thing was vague and confusing because the people involved in the conflict made it vague and confusing.   In theory, the full terms would be “pro-shipping” and “anti-shipping”, but it seems like it’s more about particular kinds of ships that could be considered controversial.  But that’s a slippery slope, and apparently the whole conflict mutated into both sides deciding that every hypothetical relationship between fictional characters is either equally valid or equally dangerous.  

Long story short, it’s just purity culture, which was what everyone on Tumblr was calling it around 2012.  But now, if you’re a sane person who genuinely asks: “Who gives a fuck about Voltron?”, these people will jump your ass and accuse you of being on the side of their enemies.  “Children have died over the importance of Lotor/Hagger!   Your callous indifference proves that you yourself must have murdered children!” 

I think what Sarah Z really hit upon in this video was that media consumption has become so ingrained in our culture that people feel like it has to go hand-in-hand with our morality.   That is, it’s not enough for me to watch Star Trek, I have to justify Star Trek as evidence that I’m a good person.  Maybe this is where the expression “guilty pleasure” comes from.   Conversely, it’s not enough for me to not watch Dr. Who, I have to somehow convince everyone that Dr. Who was invented by the devil.

I’m pretty sure the Reylo ship has a lot to do with this, since it’s kind of understood to be a dark, problematic concept, and fans either embrace its flaws or recoil in horror because of them.   Star Wars itself is a dumb story about space wizards, so people try to give the debate more weight by linking it to freedom of self expression and/or enabling real world harm.   Suddenly it’s not enough to just think two actors would look cute making out instead of fighting.   Now it’s this battlefield for the soul of civilization or something.

I grew up in the 80′s, when “concerned parents” and grifters would accuse the Smurfs and metal bands of promoting satanism and witchcraft.   I used to hear stories of teens going out into the woods in the middle of the night to do occult stuff, and all I could ever think about was: “Why would anyone bother wandering out in the woods in the middle of the night?”  Which is why “concerned parents” turned their attention to things that were closer to home, like Saturday morning cartoons.   It had nothing to do with the content; it was just about finding a safe, accessible target for their hysteria.   Some people want to go on a crusade without leaving the house, so they pick a fight with Papa Smurf instead of confronting the real evils in the world.  Even as a kid, I knew this was a con, because I’d watched the show for myself and knew it was too saccharine to be threat to anyone.

The pro/anti folks have tried to disguise this with a lot of terminology.   I wondered why they seemed to reluctant to use the full terms “pro-shipper” and “anti-shipper”, and it’s probably a couple of things.   First, the word “shipper” is basically an admission that this is pointless bullshit that doesn’t matter, and they’d like to avoid that connotation.   Second, they seem to have decided that this goes beyond shipping itself, into practically anything else they want it to involve.  It’s all part of the con, which is to make you believe that it’s “us vs. them”, and you can be part of “us” by curating specific attitudes about Steven Universe.

Seriously, “about Steven Universe” is such an incredible punchline.  You can make anything funnier by adding those three words to the end of a sentence.   “Do not interact if you blog about Steven Universe.”   “Hey, what’s up, YouTube, this is SSJ3RyokoLover69, and this is going to be kind of a serious video about Steven Universe.”   “Mrs. Johnson, the results of your biopsy are in, and I have some bad news about Steven Universe.”   It’s a fucking kids show.   “Oh no, all the characters look like the characters in all the other kids shows!”   Yeah, that’s because it’s a kids show.   Marvin looks like Garfield, this isn’t new.

The common denominator here seems to be that both sides try to wrap themselves in the flag of vulnerable groups: impressionable minors, trauma survivors, harassment victims, etc.   The “pros” want to protect those people so that they can feel free to explore weird subject matter on their own terms, and the “antis” want to protect the same people from being exposed to weird subject matter that they might not want to see.   It’s all about establishing a moral high ground.   Back in the day, it was called “sanctimony”. 

But people get roped into this, because at their core, people want approval, and this stupid conflict offers them a sense of community.  As long as you support the cause, whatever it may be, you’ll have this online friend network that appears to support anything you do.   But if you deviate from their norm, you’ll be cast out.    Does this sound familiar?

To use a more familiar example, I still sometimes find people clamoring about Gochi vs. Vegebul.   I’ve never understood this, because both ships were canon, and I never saw much direct evidence of a war between them, but people would still talk about how crazy the Vegebul shippers were, and how crazy the Gochi shippers were, and it was like some huge thing going on just over the hills.   It’s the same idea, since the idea that you could like both or neither never seems to occur to anyone involved.   I never gave a shit, because I used to see the same dumb agendas in the Harry Potter fandom.

Okay, so let me take you back.  It’s 2005 through 2011, and I’m hateblogging all seven Harry Potter novels, because fuck you, that’s why.  The funny thing I encountered was that occasionally fans seemed to want to pretend like my bashing of certain characters was proving them right somehow.    They were like “See?  He hates Ron Weasley too!  That proves that Seamus Finnegan is the coolest guy ever.”   The Slytherin stans would do this all the time, because I would constantly take the piss out of the Gryffindor characters for being self-important dopes.   I think they just liked hearing it from an outside perspective.   But I had to keep reminding them all that I hated all of them.   Every character from Harry Potter sucks ass. Voldemort was my favorite, but only because he was the one guy who wanted to kill all of the others.   But he sucks too because he failed. 

And the shippers were the same way.   I’d say something shitty about Ron, because Ron sucks, and some smartass Joss Whedon fan would be like “Yes!  Boost the signal!  That is why Harry/Hermione is the best ship!”  And I’d be like “No, Harry and Hermione suck at least as bad as Ron does.  They’re all terrible and I hate them.”   I really do think there was some sort of Stockholm Syndrome going on with Harry Potter books, where everyone secretly knows they suck, but the fans sort of latch on to one or two characters and go like “Well, he’s not as shitty as the rest.”   Like finding spaghetti in the trash and picking out the meatball with the least amount of lint on it.   Then you’d go and start a flamewar with some other starving person over whether your meatball is shittier than theirs.  This is what people mean when they say to read another book. 

Anyway, the big thing I picked up from Sarah Z’s video is “disinterpretation”, a term coined by MSNBC columnis Zeeshan Aleem.   The Twitter thread is worth a read, but the short version is that he once remarked that a Julia Louis-Dreyfus routine wasn’t very good, and someone got mad at him for insinuating that women are incapable of being funny.    They just took his dissatisfaction with one performance by one comedian as being a universal condemnation of women comedians in general.  And this sort of thing is all over the internet.   Everyone sees what they want to see and then they take it as permission to overreact.  

I ran into this myself a while back, because someone saw who I interacted with on Twitter and decided that they’re all bad guys and if I have any interaction with them, then that makes me a bad guy too.   At the time I tried to play it cool, but the more I think about it, the more it ticks me off.   And over the course of that conversation, it was said that I don’t talk about myself much, and that’s kind of funny, because all I ever do on social media is write long-ass blog posts like this one.  I don’t expect anyone to memorize them, or even read them all the way through, but when I write all this stuff and someone goes out of their way to say they don’t know anything about me, the message is that they just didn’t pay attention to what I was saying, and they didn’t bother to try.

So I’m a little jaded from that, because I got called out for a bunch of stuff I didn’t even do or say, and apparently that’s just a thing that happens.   People will reject you for completely arbitrary reasons, not because of anything you actually said or did, and you’re left thinking you made some terrible mistake.   Except, no, I’ve seen it happen to other people, people a lore more conscientious than I am, and if they can’t satisfy the bullshit purity standards, then I never stood a chance.   If the game is rigged so I can’t win, then I’m not going to play.  

And it’s that same condition that probably draws people into these online holy wars, because if you declare yourself for the pro or anti side, at least then you’ll have a posse backing you up.   Only they don’t support you, they support your willingness to support them.    Once your commitment to their agenda wavers, even in the slightest, they will turn against you.   

Sarah Z suggests that both sides of the war drop the pro and anti terms, since they lost all meaning long ago.   But that just invites a new set of useless terms to perpetuate the same cycle.   Her more useful advice is for fandom people to broaden their horizons.   She got a lot of flak for tweeting “Go outside” once, but the ironic thing is that it’s sound advice.   I had lunch with my mom yesterday and it was just nice getting away from things for a while.   People need to do that more often, and unfortunately it feels like it’s harder to do than ever before.

But “go outside” isn’t just a literal thing.   It can mean going beyond your usual haunts, reading the same books, watching the same shows, rehashing the same conversations.   I think the reason this stuff always revolves around “shipping” is because there seems to be this deep-seated compulsion to pair fictional characters off like this, and for a lot of folks it’s the only way they can consume a story, so they do.   And they do it lot, and there’s a lot of them, and they do it the same way every time, and lo and behold the same old conflicts start up.   So maybe “go outside” should mean “go outside of that cycle once in a while.”   Just a thought. 

[pizzarollsims]

Coming back to Tumblr is something I'd thought about for a while, but this post is hopefully going to be the thought I had today that I just HAD to get out there. It's not juicy or anything, it's just something I didn't particularly want a bunch of "thoughts and prayers" replies to and I know that's exactly what I'd get on Facebook.

So I'm thinking heavily on the "martyr mentality" I feel gets pushed. The "tough it out," crowd, the people who celebrate going in to work unless they're practically vomiting blood and have at least three broken bones. The crowd who play "pain Olympics" with, "I don't know why Suzie can't handle a simple job when she only has [blankety blank]"

And honestly, well, this is a personal decision. Because no, am I going to come to work with an IV pole and chemo hanging? Nah I'm good. But I do enjoy my job mostly. And I have a lot in life I enjoy that requires me to have a good, steady income. I also know that when I was furloughed during covid, it was one of the lowest points on my life. I like the momentum.

I've veered a little off point, but where I'm leading, is that this has lead to me somewhat tolerating a lot of "issues" with my body.

My neck hurts? It's tension. Isn't everyone stressed?!

Headaches every day? Isn't that also pretty much everyone? And while they aren't localized to the front of my face... That doctor did say he still thinks it's my sinuses. HaVe SoMe fLoNaSe. Dizzy? Yeah, must be those damned sinuses. Or maybe I should eat.

How did I actually find out something is actually wrong? I was walking through a parking lot and a parking gate fell on my damn head. And I got a CT. Even then, I was told the CT was normal. The next day I got the email, "Hey, you have some new results on your patient portal." I looked out of boredom. Long story short, I'm having a Chiari decompression next month which is an operation which involves my skull, the covering of my brain, and my c1 vertebrae.

So my point is no, I don't want to let these headaches and aches and pains run my life. But damn, that "suck it up" mentality did nothing to help me.

If anyone has actually made it this far and actually reading this, don't ignore your red flags. If you think a "sinus headache" in the back of your head sounds like a crock of shit, go somewhere else.

[jq37]

The Royal Report– A Crown of Candy Ep 17 For Candia (Part 2)--Mini Recap

Hey guys. It’s been a bit, huh?

I haven’t been on Tumblr a bunch lately because I’ve been busy as hell irl for a lot of reasons, but I also hate to leave a thing undone, especially when it’s so close to being done. So I decided to provide at least some level of closure for anyone who might have stumbled across these with no access to the ep and really wants to know how the story ends.

Maybe I’ll do a proper recap at some point but, for now, let’s wrap things up.

This episode is basically a series of Boss Fights standing in for the more significant but less interesting final battle going on in which the Rocks Family face off against all the Important NPCs.

Amethar and Joren together waste Grissini, Amethar saying that he might have been good to Jet, but he’s fighting for the wrong side. (Joren goes down but it’s never really resolved whether he survives or not. I feel like he probably did considering Liam’s epilogue.)

Ally gets their obligatory Nat 20 to intimidate Keradin for the rest of the fight by greatly shaking his faith in the Bulb before icing him. Then he sees the Pontifex watching the fight from the wall of the keep and makes a beeline. 

Amethar, likewise, sees Cal running across the castle wall and breaks from his unit to go after him.

Ciabatta shows up and I am reminded in the absolute DOPEST way that Ruby never used her watersteel dagger. “In sweetness there is strength, bitch.” Ciabatta is toast. 

White flags start to go up. 

Liam catches up to the Pontifex, does the insane amounts of damage that’s just like par for the course for him at this point, and drops her, taking St. Citrina’s Book. 

Cal tries to make for a secret tunnel to escape but Cumulus blocks his path. Amethar blocks him off from the other side. “What’s the last part of my title? Say it.” Cal, being forced to kneel by Cumulus, acknowledges his “Unfallen” title (throwing a man w/ the title “the Unfallen” off a roof and not checking to see if he’s dead is the very height or hubris. That’s some, “Not even God can sink this ship” levels of asking for it) and then attacks. Amethar gets 4 attacks back and his last is a Nat 20, activating Payment Day’s special ability: On a Nat 20 against someone who has killed a member of Amethar’s family? That person instantly dies. Boom. Fight is over just like that. Piece of cake. 

With all the Big Bads dead, the fight is more or less over other than logistics. Or at least it would be if Brennan didn’t have some mind games up his sleeves. As the fight is winding down, Ruby and Rina lock eyes and they both know they have a moment to turn the tide in their favor in their little cold war by attacking the other and striking first. Out of game, Brennan makes Siobhan and Emily decide secretly on slips of paper whether they each want to attack or show compassion. It’s a classic prisoner’s dilemma setup. If they both play nice, it’s golden. If they both attack, it’s even. If you play nice and get betrayed, you’re screwed. 

But like...it’s D20. It’s the Game of Thrones season of D20 but it’s still D20. 

They choose compassion, both of them. 

“Saccharina, you’re an astonishing leader, but I can’t be your subject. But please, I would like to be your sister,” Ruby says, and Siobhan keeps her perfect track record of taking me out in every finale. 

Rina has her guys stand down (to Swifty’s dismay). Ruby tells a skeptical Cara to stand down and choose family (which she does, snapped out of her paranoia by Ruby’s brave move).

Brennan’s attempt at PvP thwarted, Amethar swears on the Book of Leaves that he was named Emperor and Primsy--who is here in too for some reason--recognizes the claim. That leaves the recently (forcibly) vacated throne of Castle Candy to Rina. Which is great for her because Liam remembers the wish seed and uses it to just quadruple Candia in size, the absolute madman. 

We get epilogues! Liam becomes Master Gardener (and also casually says that he brought back the Pontifex and Kerradin to jail them which is wild because that’s not a spell that exists in this world--Ally just brute forced it in in the last second in a line so poetic that Brennan was just forced to let it happen). Cumulus takes a break from snapping chicken’s necks. Theo gets laid. Rina and Ruby do the sister thing and Ruby joins the circus for a while. Cinnamon becomes a vegetarian which mellows out his constant hunger. And Amethar enjoys time with his newly expanded family. For the first time in a while, things are looking sweet. 

A Few Notes

I’m going to fight the editor who had me worried about the “family is exposed” clip all season for the exact wrong reason. But also, gold star. Well played.  

Lol at Brennan not even getting his PvP in the GOT season w/ a prisoner’s dilemma. Like, give it up dude. Watch next season start in media res during a fight to the death to force everyones’ hands. 

On the same topic, very funny that the previous episode it was like, “Loyalties tested! Lines drawn!” and then this episode Theo was like, “Come on guys you shoulda just talked to me. I would never betray you.” It’s like he just wanted to have a dramatic moment. 

MVP this ep is Ruby with the watersteel dagger imo. Like everyone had their moment. And Amethar w/ that Nat 20 was dope but you were kind of waiting for that all season. But I totally forgot Ruby had that dagger. I, like, verbally cheered when she pulled it out. 

I haven’t watched the last AP or the behind the scenes special so I don’t know that much about unseen characters besides what I’ve glimpsed on Twitter/Tumblr but Amand Maillard looks very dope. 

I wish we’d gotten to know more about Citrina. Like I get that if you dump these players in a world, they’re gonna wanna take down The Man and often The Man is The Church and the Pontifex *did* need to go but sometimes people are just Good and I dug her (Citrina’s) vibe in the flashback we got.

I can’t believe Siobhan got me with the “Be my sister/Let me be your sister” stuff in back to back seasons. You’d think I would have developed some resistance in the intervening months. Nope! Weak as ever baybee!  

One Final Thing

One of the reasons I’ve been so busy lately is I’ve been working on my podcast*, Absolutely No Adventures, which is dropping in a tiny bit over a month. The trailer drops on Sunday so if you wanna check that out when it’s out, you can follow the show’s Twitter (@noadventurespod)! I’ll also link it here as my pinned post once it’s up. I hope some of y’all check it out! 

*ONE of my podcasts but one announcement at a time.

[miracle-sham]

When Sitting on the Roof, We are but Coffee Sleuths.

| {Sequel to Death is the Stage, My Art is Your Grave.} |

| [Ao3 Link] | | [Masterlist Link] | | [DitSMAiYG Link] |

| {Repost due to original post disappearing from tags.} |

| Triggers/Warnings: Mentions of drugs/drug ring (in regards to a case), Mild language. |

| After a long day of boring casework, there's nothing better than getting a new commission, and then drinking coffee and having a chat on top of a roof with a certain bat. |

| Word Count: 3051 |

==–==

| A/N: First of all, I'd like to quickly thank everyone for all the positive response and support the original oneshot got on both Tumblr and Ao3! It really motivated and inspired me to continue with this Au (expect at least another sequel, maybe more if I get more inspo but even if I don't there's definitely gonna be one sequel minimum to this). I'd also like to mention, that this took a lot longer to write as I got a cold halfway through writing it and also it's romance based fluff (which is not my forté), but thanks to those who've waited for this! And finally, for reasons that I'll explain in a separate post later, it might be a "little" while before I can start work on the sequel to this one but it will get written at some point. |

| If you want to be tagged in future oneshots/fics, or a specific Au, then send me a DM or an ask! |

| Also side note, Don't Like? Don't Read. Also also, please do not criticise any of my writing. This was written for fun and receiving criticism, even in a compliment/criticism sandwich, is the exact opposite of fun. |

==–==

It's been a month since Marinette got kidnapped, kissed Red Robin, and solved the Elemental Park Serial Killer case. For three weeks she's been held off active duty to make sure her bruised ribs heal but now that she's able to be on active duty again, all the available cases are those that are paperwork heavy. A small part of her misses the immediate healing of the Miraculous Cure but she's not Ladybug anymore and even if she was, it would raise too many flags for her to even use it anyway. But logic doesn't stop her from missing the days when she could literally and metaphorically magic away her aches and pains.

Marinette groans and slumps into her chair, it's been a surprisingly slow day at the GCPD, so when her phone beeps rapidly for a few seconds, she thinks, please be something interesting, and can't help but take a quick glance to see what new notifications she has. The screen reads: '3 new messages from Red'. So she taps the notification and reads through each message.

>RedRob: Hey, found some new evidence on our case, want to meet up for coffee to discuss it?

>RedRob: Rooftop coffee after dark, of course.

>RedRob: I mean I could waltz into a coffee shop during the day in my suit but that might get too much attention for case talk.

Marinette snickers to herself as she reads the messages over a second time. She quickly taps out her response.

>MariBlue: Will we need to worry about one of the other Gotham vigilantes crashing our coffee not-date?

Almost instantly she receives a response.

>RedRob: I'll bribe Oracle or Batgirl, maybe even Black Bat, into keeping the others away.

She sends a heart emoji back, then returns to sorting out her boring paperwork.

Detective Grayson raises an eyebrow at her from over the desk, clearly having caught her looking at her phone. “Red Robin again?”

She flashes him a sheepish grin. “How'd you guess.”

He gives her a deadpan stare. “He's the only person you respond to when working.”

Marinette bites her lip. “Whoops, that obvious?”

“Yes.” Detective Grayson hesitates for a second, he leans in closer—and like a teenage girl at a sleepover in a cheesy teen drama, asks, “So are you dating yet?”

She shrugs. “Well neither of us have asked the other so not really.”

“But you guys are perfect for each other!” He exclaims, gesturing towards her with an outstretched arm—very narrowly avoiding knocking anything off the desk.

It's Marinette's turn to raise an eyebrow. “We literally have only seen or talked to each other when working…”

“So? What do you call you quote unquote "not-dates"” He huffs, making air quotes as he speaks.

She huffs and shakes her head. “There's a reason they're called "not-dates" and that's because we discuss work at them. And anyway it's too early to rush our relationship.”

“Fair.” Detective Grayson stills, frowns and then almost hesitantly, he asks, “Is it because if the mask? The whole not knowing his real identity?”

Marinette rolls her eyes and shakes her head again. “Nope, I couldn't care less about finding out his real identity—at least not without his consent that is.”

He hums, a pensive look on his face. “So you're not curious?”

She shrugs. “Not particularly, why?”

Detective Grayson shrugs back. “Just wondering,” he leans back on his chair and for a split second, Marinette fears he might topple over but somehow he seems unaffected by gravity, “I think you're the first person I've met, who doesn't want to know who's behind a vigilante's mask.”

A smile tugs at Marinette's lips. “I think it's kinda dumb that so many people are obsessed with the people behind the masks because if they're doing good, unmasking them will only deter them from continuing fighting the good fight and all that, y'know.”

He nods slowly, “huh, that's one way of putting it I guess but I agree, the vigilantes do more for this city than people think they do.” Detective Grayson then tilts his head towards the Commissioner's office. “Anyway back to work, don't want to get in more trouble with the Commish than we are already!”

Marinette huffs in amusement and rolls her eyes but complies nonetheless. Wouldn't do to get in trouble so soon after getting back onto active duty!

==–==

It isn't until gone seven pm, that Marinette finally gets home. She slips through the door, locking it behind her. Now that she's in, the first thing she does, as she does every day, is check her online portfolio and commission site.

Marinette plops herself down in her wheely chair and logs onto to her computer, going through all the verification and security Max had kindly added. A new commission notification grabs her attention. With three clicks, she brings up the new commission's details. She scrolls down to the name of the commissioner: one Mr 'T. Drake-Wayne'.

Curious as to why the name sounds vaguely familiar, Marinette opens up a tab on Google with a hum and types in the name. Upon reading the top results, she half chokes in shock and thinks to herself, Are you kidding me? She blinks and breathes in, a small part of her very glad she wasn't drinking anything otherwise she definitely would've fully choked on that or spat it all up from the shock. I know a bunch of well-known celebrities have all commissioned me many times before, but still why the heck is a fortune 500 CEO commissioning me? I'm not Audrey Bourgeois, Gabriel Agreste, or even Valen-hecking-tino. I do celebrities, not fortune 500. The heck. What. The. Actual. Heck.

Eyes wide and gobsmacked, Marinette shakes her head and clicks back to her latest commission's details page to read through the actual commission. After reading the first line, she scrambles for her sketchbook and begins jotting down notes and scribbling down ideas.

Half an hour in, Marinette takes a break to sort out and eat dinner, no point designing on an empty stomach but once she's done eating and washed up, she goes straight back to designing.

Even at a quarter past midnight, she's still at it—surprisingly only three drafts in and so thoroughly lost in her own head in designing, Marinette nearly misses the knocking against her window facing the fire escape.

The rapid rap-tap-tap spooks her so much that she falls out of her chair with an “Eep!”

Marinette, face flushing bright red, scrambles up and scurries over to the window in question. Shoving her blinds out the way, she stares through the window and is greeted with the absolutely glorious sight of a beaming and uninjured Red Robin holding two takeaway coffee cups on the fire escape. He waves at her with one hand and gestures for her to join him on the fire escape.

She can't help but grin back at him and deftly opens the window and slinks out onto the fire escape. He hands a coffee cup towards her and instead of taking it, Marinette gives him a good ol' bearhug—smooshing pressing her face into his Kevlar armoured chest. Which is unsurprisingly, very uncomfortable. She shifts her head to stare up at him (as he's at least whole head taller than her) “Hey,” she greets.

Awkwardly hugging her back, as to not spill either of the coffees in the process, “hey yourself,” Red Robin responds, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead.

Marinette pulls back from the hug and nabs the coffee cup that had been offered to her before their hug. “Thank you~!”

“No problem.” He then gestures towards the fire escape stairs leading to the roof, “after you.”

“So which of our cases did you manage to get a lead for?” She asks, making her way up to the roof.

“The one pertaining to the new drug ring in the fashion district. I've narrowed down where they're storing the drugs to potentially three warehouses near Miller Harbour.” Red Robin answers, following after her.

Reaching the roof, Marinette sits down on the half wall around the roof edge. She glances over at Red Robin as he joins her on the improvised seat. “That's the drug ring dealing Miraclo right?”

“Yeah, that's the one.” He pauses to take a sip of his coffee, “I got the intel from an old friend of Catwoman's called Mackey lives in an apartment that overlooks the Harbour and saw a shipment of the drug arrive at the warehouses.”

Taking a sip of her own coffee, Marinette raises an eyebrow. “And will Detective Grayson and I will be able to get that intel as witness statement?”

Red Robin nods. “Yep, Catwoman's vouching for you both.”

She jerks back in surprise, nearly toppling off the half wall but managing to cling to the edge in time to keep her from falling. Miraculously somehow managing to avoid dropping or spilling her coffee. Oof, if it wasn't for my stint in Spandex I definitely would've made a fool of myself in front of Red Robin. And here I thought that part of my life had since passed. Marinette thinks to herself, wincing at the newly gained superficial graze across her palms. She clears her throat and attempts to look like she didn't just nearly fall off a half wall. “Catwoman's vouching for us? Since when? I've literally never encountered her before.”

Red Robin, the traitor, snorts at her predicament. “You are the epitome of elegance. And Detective Grayson's bumped into her a few times on the job.”

“Thanks.” She responds drily, layering on the sarcasm thickly. She shakes her head and sighs. “So do you know what the addresses are for the warehouses and this Mackey's apartment?”

He takes an excruciatingly slow sip of his coffee before speaking. “Of course I can, what kind of vigilante do you take me for?” He then proceeds to rattle off the addresses.

Which Marinette jots down on the napkin that came with her coffee, and puts it into a pocket for safekeeping. “Thank you.” With it written down, she pauses then starts kicking her legs in the air. She sniffs. “And I take you for the kind that flirts with innocent police officers.”

Red Robin grins at her as he gently elbows her in the ribs. “I don't hear you complaining.”

Marinette scoffs and slaps her hand to her chest in an overly dramatic mock of shock. “Unfair! If I complained I wouldn't get any hugs or kisses from you!”

Humming he wraps an arm around her shoulders and presses a kiss to her temple. “That's true, what a shame it would be for you to miss out on all those hugs.”

She hums back and the two ease into a comfortable silence; leaning against each other and sipping their coffees whilst staring at the night sky.

Once Marinette gets halfway through her coffee, she glances at Red Robin and hesitates, her earlier conversation with Detective Grayson springing to mind. “Communication is key in healthy relationships,” she prefaces, “so are you okay with our current relationship? Y'know the flirting, the not-dates, the whole me not knowing your identity?”

Red Robin laughs, sounding slightly bitter. “Of course I'm fine with the flirting and not-dates but I'm not going to lie and say I don't have any worries over you not knowing my identity. It's one of the reasons a relationship I had with a fellow mask didn't work out.” Rubbing at his jaw, he tilts his face away from her slightly, as though reminiscing about something. He then shakes his head and turns back to her. “Really, I ought to be asking you that. So what about you, are you okay with how our relationship is?”

Marinette hums. “This isn't the first time relationship I've had with a masked hero.” Then takes a calm sip of her coffee.

“So you've got a thing for masks then huh? Lucky me I guess.” He responds, smirking mischievously, and whilst she can't see the rest of his face thanks to the cowl, Marinette just knows that he's wiggling his eyebrows at her from underneath that cowl.

His comment nearly sends her tumbling off the half wall—again. She coughs and splutters in laughter as she nearly spits up her sip of coffee. It takes her a full thirty seconds to recover and mock gripes, “remind me why I love you again.”

Red Robin cocks his head to the side and grins. “Because I bring you coffee?”

She huffs, “good point.”

“So back to the mask thing, can I ask what happened with your masked hero relationship?” He asks, tone hesitant. He stares at her, ready to back off the topic at the slightest sign of discomfort from her.

Marinette hisses through her teeth and states, “I can trust you.”

His stare conveys an 'I would hope so' whilst he bobs his head a little in a 'yes you can' and a 'please continue' gesture.

She takes a deep breath before speaking, “I used to be a hero, back when I lived in Paris.”

“Oh?” Red Robin freezes, thrown off guard by her admission.

Nodding, Marinette continues. “It was difficult. We started when we were barely teens and had no training and no support except for temporary heroes we could bring in when the battles got too hard for just me and my partner to handle. When we started, we were repeatedly told to never, under any circumstances, let anyone find out our identities. My partner and I, neither of us knew who the other was beneath the mask. And we only knew the identities of the temporary heroes because we gave them the ability to become superheroes. But even then we didn't always know their real identities and they certainly never knew ours.”

“Yikes.” Is all he can respond with, mind racing with questions. “That can't have been good, at least I had Batman and Nightwing when I was starting out, but you had no one to talk to about being a mask, outside the mask.”

She flashes him a watery smile and sighs. “No, I did have someone. Tikki. But we're uh, not in contact any more. Since I retired.”

Still, Red Robin makes a noise of concern at that.

“Anyway, one thing led to another led to another, and my partner found out my identity.” Marinette puts her coffee down then tips her head back and closes her eyes. “We started dating not long after that. But once we defeated the BBEG terrorising Paris and some… concerning things came to light, our—we,” She shakes her head, “we realised that because of that, neither of us were emotionally able to continue our relationship in a romantic way. So we decided to stay friends and I—uh, I retired and moved to Gotham.”

He puts his coffee down as well, and pulls her into a tight hug, although making sure it wasn't too constricting as to not make her uncomfortable. “I'm sorry.”

She leans into the hug, rests her head on his shoulder, and delicately wraps her arms around him in return. “What? Why? It's not your fault.”

Red Robin frowns, not that she can see in their current position, “I know but no one should be forced into becoming a hero at such a young age with no support network.”

Huffing, Marinette buries her face in his shoulder, somewhat muffling her voice but not enough to make her unintelligible, “what about Spoiler? She became a hero around that age and had no support network.”

He sighs. “Spoiler chose to become a vigilante, she wasn't forced. And anyway, she had Robin and the rest of the bats to support her once they realised what she was doing.”

“Hmm… fair.” Marinette pulls back from the hug and pauses. “On a lighter note, I got a commission on my fashion site from Tim Drake-Wayne!”

Red Robin raises an eyebrow and with poorly concealed amusement, responds, “Oh? And what's so special about him”

She rolls her eyes at him. “He's the youngest fortune five hundred CEO, founded the Neon Knights among other charities, and often donates to various charities around Gotham! Plus Wayne Enterprises is one of, if not the most ethical company in the fortune five hundred bracket. Employees get living stipends, and training and higher education paid by the company. They get healthcare and dental insurance. They get flexible work hours, paid breaks, and receive above minimum wage pay!”

He laughs. “I guess he is a pretty decent sounding guy then.”

“Mhmm.”

“So what's the commission then? Or is it a secret?” He teases, leaning towards her.

Marinette dramatically places her hand over her heart. “I guess I can spare you the details this one time.”

“Wooh!”

She bites her lip before launching into a long ramble about the commission, gushing over what design and colour palette she's thinking of going with, what bots and bobs and patterns to add, what stitch to use and how to make sure it fits his style, etc.

Red Robin spends the entire time listening attentively, despite not really understanding half the fashion terms, and staring at her like a love-struck puppy.

“Damn, I love you!” He exclaims once she finishes speaking, then leans in to kiss her on the lips.

Marinette bursts into giggles and kisses him back. Her giggles are seemingly infectious, as once they part from the kiss, both are giggling and flushed red.

A bright flash of white followed by a camera shutter sound immediately distracts them both. They just manage to catch sight of Nightwing swinging away.

She gives him a look, which is somewhat less effective as she's still smiling from the kiss. “What happened to bribing Oracle, Black Bat, or Batgirl?”

Red Robin groans and drops his face into his hands. “Clearly Nightwing was able to one-up my bribe. Probably in the form of giving them copies of the photos both he and Detective Grayson have taken.”

“You mean to tell me those two are working together? No wonder Detective Grayson was asking about our relationship earlier today at work!” Marinette gasps, sounding mildly horrified and betrayed.

“Are you thinking what I'm thinking?” Red Robin asks, lifting his head up and grinning deviously at her.

She smirks back, “Revenge?”

He nods—the sagely kind of nod. “Revenge.”

==–==

| Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this little oneshot! Comments, likes, and reblogs are much appreciated! |

@casual-darkness

[princess-sengoku]

Secret Santa Fanfic

@hunny-pp This is for your request in Secret Santa for this year. I hope this is great. Merry Christmas to you and Merry Christmas to everyone else. AAAA My first fanfic to be posted on Tumblr :')

Carnival Competition

Rating: K

Modern AU

Summary: Shingen and Kenshin are going to Osaka carnival to see who can win the most games at the carnival.

The carnival's in town as everyone from all over the land of the rising sun go to one of the most underrated festivals in the land; Osaka Carnival. The fun games, great food, and amazing rides that it had was all in good fun for everyone to enjoy. Once Shingen heard for himself that the carnival was going to be in town tomorrow, he just had to call Kenshin to join him for the carnival. He was disappointed that he didn't show up last year, then again they weren't dating at the time. Maybe this year would go in his favor? He and Kenshin could at least compete in the games, kinda like a battlefield? Shingen was in Osaka for a quick vacation and the carnival would be the top of the cake. With that in mind, Shingen picked up the phone and began to text to Kenshin.

Shingen: My stoic dragon "nemesis", are you still awake?

Kenshin was comfortable on his futon at his Castle, just starting to head off to bed and sending a quick prayer to Bishamonten to thank the god of war for allowing him the pleasures of life. There was wine, business, and finally Shingen. Shingen was probably one of the most worthy friend and business partner he could ask for in this life. Although he didn't show much happiness on his stoic face, his actions show that he cares for him, especially when he accepted to be Shingen’s boyfriend. Speaking of Shingen… 'Bing Bing'. Kenshin heard his phone go off. "It is almost time to go to bed… Who's texting me?" He said, visibly annoyed. He picked up his phone and once he saw the message, he softened a little bit. It was Shingen. 

Kenshin: Tiger of Kai, my "nemesis", I was about to go to bed, but I can talk for a bit.

Shingen gave a good-natured chuckle at Kenshin's message sent a couple of minutes later. Of course he forgot that Kenshin would be getting to bed around this time.

Shingen: Sorry about that, I was hoping maybe this year we can go to the carnival together. Think of it as a date.

"A date?" He mouthed to himself. When was the last time they had a date together? It had been a while. They were both taking it slowly so they wouldn't be discovered and to have it at a carnival, that everyone was going to…

Kenshin: Are you sure you want me to go?

Shingen was not giving up on making him go to the carnival. They were always competitive when it came to the games. A lightbulb went off in his head. He can use the games as an excuse for him to go.

Shingen: I bet I can win a lot more games than you. Don't worry I'll give you some prizes :)

Shingen always knew how to push Kenshin's competitiveness button. They both were like strategists in their own businesses but eventually one must come on top eventually. He really now was interested in this carnival but he would conceal his intentions to him.

Kenshin: It is tempting to go to the festival to have a friendly competition. Go have fun. Good night "nemesis"

Shingen shrugged at his message. At least he tried to convince him to go. At the back of his head, he did feel that Kenshin would come here. He just had that hunch.

Shingen: Good night. Don't have a rough night.

As soon as he got Shingen’s message, Kenshin got dressed again, called his limo driver, and took a blanket. He would now begin to surprise Shingen to the festival date. "Shingen, let's see who wins the most games." he thought with confidence. They always liked competitive plays over each other. He just thought of what kind of games would be there to play as the limo left with him inside, going to Osaka, as he drifted to sleep.

~The next morning- 8 AM~

Shingen saw the shining sun glimmer in the curtains as morning came and he was just starting to wake up from the tiger's slumber. This short bald man yawned as he sat up in the bed, slowly getting his act together. It was also very hot today when the festival and vacation was in the summer. He could only imagine what the south had to deal with like the Shimazu in the summer. After 10 minutes of just sitting there, he finally got up to brighten the room. The curtains opened and Shingen shielded his eyes from the brightness a bit. Once it got adjusted, he finally saw a limo in front of the hotel. It had the Uesugi symbol on the side and the limo was white. He could see Kenshin come out the doors. "Hahaha, I knew Kenshin would be here!" Shingen said to himself. He put on a tiger print t-shirt with some khaki shorts and some sandals.

Kenshin walked out of the limo with a nice short sleeved buttoned white shirt with white pants with some nice black loafers. He was casually sleeping the whole ride so he would be well rested for today. Carnivals are mostly energy sucking. The driver let him know he's here so he doesn't have to rest during the day. "Great Bishamonten, please give me strength to have fun today and beat Shingen in a whole bunch of games." He prayed. They both met in the lobby and gave a hug. "Haha, I knew you would come. So are you ready for the carnival?" Shingen asked. Kenshin gave a small smile and nodded. "I am. Looking at the clock means that it had just started." Said Kenshin as he looked at the clock which read 9:00A.M.

Looking out at the carnival laid out before them, it was full of life and high fun energy. Many games, food stands and other attractions can be seen before them. People were walking around them full of laughter and friendly talk. You can't really hear what they had to say because there were so many people and they were loud. Shingen and Kenshin simply walked side by side together holding pinkies looking out at what games they should play.

The first game they saw was kinda strange with a huge log and there were lines in the ground. Musashi was actually the one hosting that game. "Hey you two! Do you want to try the log toss? 1 yen to try it and the rules are clearly read on the sign." He managed to get Shingen and Kenshin's attention. "You want to have a go Kenshin?" Asked Shingen. "Sure" said Kenshin blatantly. 

They both walk up to the wooden sign. It was well made with no chances that anyone can get a splinter and it looked really smooth for writing on as shown in words that are painted on. It says the following: 

Log toss:

'You throw a log as far as you can. This can be played for competition. If you are solo, you win a prize no matter what. If you are against each other, then the winner gets a prize.'

Shingen was known to do some lifting at the gym sometimes, Kenshin watched him while he worked so he knew as well. They've decided to do the competition version. The prizes included stuffed animals, posters and pins. Shingen went first as he went and picked it up by the sides then he spinned around a few times getting ready for the wind up. He threw it up and away pretty far and it landed with a thud and the ground shaked a bit. Musashi ran to where the log went with a measuring tape and a flag. "150 feet-1st person!" Musashi announced. Kenshin smiled at Shingen’s impressive performance. It was as expected for him as was a worthy challenge for Kenshin to try to beat.

"You're next Kenshin." Shingen said as he stood back with a smirk, a smirk that Kenshin loved a lot. "I have practiced a bit in lifting." Kenshin remarked as he picked up the log. He winded up by standing back a bit then using the force that he gathered to launch the log forward as he stepped forward. It flew not as high as Shingen did but it definitely was going far. There was a thud in the distance and Musashi was running fast with the other marker. "Not bad! It's about… 160 feet. The second person wins!" Musashi announced happily as he went to pick out a prize. Kenshin kissed Shingen on the forehead proud of his own victory. "Well done 'nemesis'." Shingen said, congratulating him. Musashi gave Kenshin a big tiger plush. 'It would be perfect for Shingen.' Kenshin thought.

Many hours go by with more prizes, food, the times they went through a funhouse and a haunted house in a succession while holding many little toys, pins, posters, more stuffed animals. It was a lot to carry for a long time, then again they had played lots of games. Games were ring toss, balloon pop, guess what's approximately in the jar, bumper cars, test your strength, and many other games.

It was the last few minutes of the carnival to be open for the day. There was one more game they wanted to try for a magnificent dragon plush. Shingen was immediately reminded of Kenshin when he saw that plush. "Kenshin! Before we go let's try this game!" They both look at the bucket of water with ducks floating right along. The sign read the following:

Lucky Duck:

'You hook a duck on the hook stick provided to you. Get a star duck (which the star is on the bottom) to win any prize you want.'

"This game sounds simple and quick." Kenshin remarked. "You can do this game." Said Kenshin as he gave the game owner 1 yen to play the game.

Shingen concentrated on the pond itself like a fire trying to get hotter by the minute. Any of those ducks could have a star on the bottom and any number of the ducks could have stars. They all looked the same. All he could do would be to guess which one had the star and which ones didn't. He took the hook stick on the ground and just went for it, eyes closed. When he opened them again, he looked underneath the duck and a gold star was at the bottom. He won the game and the dragon. "This is great!" thought Shingen as he got the dragon in his hands.

As Shingen turned he saw Kenshin take the tiger plush out of the mass of prizes they won and handed it out like it was a gift for him. Shingen saw a slight blush on Kenshin's stoic face. "So umm… this is for you 'nemesis'." Kenshin said in a softer voice than usual. Shingen laughed out of kindness a little, knowing that Kenshin wasn't used to the sometimes sweet moments of their relationship. "Thank you 'nemesis'. In return, I will give you this dragon I just won."  Shingen blushed a little bit as he received the tiger and Kenshin received the dragon. They soon divided all of the prizes in between them. Shingen’s vacation would go on and Kenshin would join in for the last week that Shingen had left.

--------------------------------------------------

P.S. as a bonus I give you some headcanons of the pairing on google slides that I made myself. This helped me create the fic lol.

[ferncurl]

Same anon. I’ve been thinking about what you said about pride month and the recirculating for a couple days. I’ve got to get something off my chest, I’m actually tired of all the pride stuff. With it recirculating throughout the year and previous years, it just sorta grinds me down. It’s gotten to the point that, to me, it feels like how some people treated vaping. “We get it. You vape.” Anyways, I’ve said my piece. I hope you and everyone else still have a happy pride month.

Hey uh h,, if ur tired of seeing pride stuff, maybe you shouldn’t be following my blog then, hm?  🙃 IDk how it is for you but as a person who’s part of the LGBT+ community, I always find it very comforting whenever I see my flag represented on something.  For folks that don’t have the safety net to be out irl, seeing that kind of representation online is very reassuring bc that’s someone saying “hey you exist and I’m another person who accepts you”.  Saying it’s like people bragging about vaping is,, kinda hurtful ngl - because ya know when you’re force-fed heteronormativity in almost every corner of media, seeing your flag on a bunch of tumblr posts or hanging in the window of a shop is like a small glimmer of hope that there are people that accept you even if they’re not your family, coworkers, the people who misgender you on purpose, or the people who stare at you when you’re holding your partner’s hand.   Basically what I’m saying is that if seeing pride stuff more than one month out of a year bothers you more than seeing nothing but straight cis people represented in almost every form of modern media - then maybe that says more about you than it does about people celebrating pride. These are lives, not just lifestyles - so if you’re tired of seeing people making their own representation, maybe just unfollow blogs like mine instead of sending asks like this bc I didn’t sign up to be your vent post :/