#hes so bisexual idk man
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spideriot · 2 months ago
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happy boyfriend day to my beautiful bisexual babygirl
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inkskinned · 1 year ago
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you're grabbing lunch with a nice man and he gives you that strange grimace-smile that's popular right now; an almost sardonic "twist" of his mouth while he looks literally down on you. it looks like he practiced the move as he leans back, arms folded. he just finished reciting the details of NFTs to you and explaining Oppenheimer even though he only watched a youtube about it and hasn't actually seen it. you are at the bottom of your wine glass.
you ask the man across from you if he has siblings, desperately looking for a topic. literally anything else.
he says i don't like small talk. and then he smiles again, watching you.
a few years ago, you probably would have said you're above celebrity gossip, but honestly, you've been kind of enjoying the dumb shit of it these days. with the rest of the earth burning, there's something familiar and banal about dragging ariana grande through the mud. you think about jeanette mccurdy, who has often times gently warned the world she's not as nice as she appears. you liked i'm glad my mom died but it made you cry a lot.
he doesn't like small talk, figure out something to say.
you want to talk about responsibility, and how ariana grande is only like 6 days older than you are - which means she just turned 30 and still dresses and acts like a 13 year old, but like sexy. there's something in there about the whole thing - about insecurity, and never growing up, and being sexualized from a young age.
people have been saying that gay people are groomers. like, that's something that's come back into the public. you have even said yourself that it's just ... easier to date men sometimes. you would identify as whatever the opposite of "heteroflexible" is, but here you are again, across from a man. you like every woman, and 3 people on tv. and not this guy. but you're trying. your mother is worried about you. she thinks it's not okay you're single. and honestly this guy was better before you met, back when you were just texting.
wait, shit. are you doing the same thing as ariana grande? are you looking for male validation in order to appease some internalized promise of heteronormativity? do you conform to the idea that your happiness must result in heterosexuality? do you believe that you can resolve your internal loneliness by being accepted into the patriarchy? is there a reason dating men is easier? why are you so scared of fucking it up with women? why don't you reach out to more of them? you have a good sense of humor and a big ol' brain, you could have done a better job at online dating.
also. jesus christ. why can't you just get a drink with somebody without your internal feminism meter pinging. although - in your favor (and judgement aside) in the case of your ariana grande deposition: you have been in enough therapy you probably wouldn't date anyone who had just broken up with their wife of many years (and who has a young child). you'd be like - maybe take some personal time before you begin this journey. like, grande has been on broadway, you'd think she would have heard of the plot of hamlet.
he leans forward and taps two fingers to the table. "i'm not, like an andrew tate guy," he's saying, "but i do think partnership is about two people knowing their place. i like order."
you knew it was going to be hard. being non-straight in any particular way is like, always hard. these days you kind of like answering the question what's your sexuality? with a shrug and a smile - it's fine - is your most common response. like they asked you how your life is going and not to reveal your identity. you like not being straight. you like kissing girls. some days you know you're into men, and sometimes you're sitting across from a man, and you're thinking about the power of compulsory heterosexuality. are you into men, or are you just into the safety that comes from being seen with them? after all, everyone knows you're failing in life unless you have a husband. it almost feels like a gradebook - people see "straight married" as being "all A's", and anything else even vaguely noncompliant as being ... like you dropped out of the school system. you cannot just ignore years of that kind of conditioning, of course you like attention from men.
"so let's talk boundaries." he orders more wine for you, gesturing with one hand like he's rousing an orchestra. sir, this is a fucking chain restaurant. "I am not gonna date someone who still has male friends. also, i don't care about your little friends, i care about me. whatever stupid girls night things - those are lower priority. if i want you there, you're there."
he wasn't like this over text, right? you wouldn't have been even in the building if he was like this. you squint at him. in another version of yourself, you'd be running. you'd just get up and go. that's what happens on the internet - people get annoyed, and they just leave. you are locked in place, almost frozen. you need to go to the bathroom and text someone to call you so you have an excuse, like it's rude to just-leave. like he already kind of owns you. rudeness implies a power paradigm, though. see, even your social anxiety allows the patriarchy to get to you.
you take a sip of the new glass of wine. maybe this will be a funny story. maybe you can write about it on your blog. maybe you can meet ariana grande and ask her if she just maybe needs to take some time to sit and think about her happiness and how she measures her own success.
is this settling down? is this all that's left in your dating pool? just accepting that someone will eventually love you, and you have to stop being picky about who "makes" you a wife?
you look down to your hand, clutching the knife.
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lucy-the-demon · 8 months ago
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Saw this portrait, you know I had to do it to him
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Feel Free to take all of these, all I did was put a flag on a piece of paper
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I won't be making anymore ( okay maybe one of just the bi flag too , but only if you want it.)
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thecosmiccrow · 1 year ago
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Showing off
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hes not landing btw. hes like. theyre like birds to me.
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me giving animal traits to my beloved blorbos real
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calebsrottingcorpse · 5 months ago
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Happy last day to be legally gay (ft. brain dead Wittebane doodle under the cut)
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moeblob · 12 days ago
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Huevember 11
Karen and Rick but in the DND AU. (I just look at this and think 'Barbie learned eldritch blast' but ya know. Whatever.)
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variksel · 2 months ago
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anthony was so real for making frances bisexual on bi visibility day (((almost)))
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abyssalzones · 7 months ago
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I'm probably nonbinary but I have college so idrc about that rn
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sun-flower-gardens · 6 months ago
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It’s been a while since I came on here but happy pride month to our one and only Bryce Larkin who 100% had a crush on Chuck Bartowski.
Speaking of Chuck, Happy Pride Month to his bisexual ass too.
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wizzardhat · 2 months ago
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every once in awhile i remember that one post where a bunch of people were like. "actually astarion is very masc for an elf. hes probably extremely manly by elf standards" as thoguh there arent literally other elves in the game who act extremely normal while asta is limp wrist thearter kid-ing all over the place like a disney villain. like baby girl its okay. you can get dommed by a prissy queen if you want nobody is judging you. this level of cope is not necessary
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chainsawctopus · 1 year ago
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I made a Yoshida-Denji roleswap AU some time ago but gave up on it cause I don't know how to design a good Ocean Devil Hybrid design LMAO 😭 Octopus Pochita's name is Takocchi, more random info in tags
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c0rvidfagg0try · 8 months ago
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Watching this show for the first with the knowledge that Buck is bi makes so many things so much more impactful than it would have if it I had watched it before
Like I just watched the scene where the old gay couple died and oh my god it makes it so much more impactful GAHHHHH
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asterroses · 9 months ago
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how do i explain to people that my favorite game right now is a skyrim mod but also not really a skyrim mod in the sense of "it adds a mod to skyrim" but in the way of "it makes skyrim into a whole new game" . im obsessed can u tell
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carcarrot · 2 months ago
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LAURENCE HARVEY a.k.a. LARUSHKA MISCHA / ZVI MOSHEH SKIKNE (born october 1st, 1928 - died november 25th, 1973)
“I always believed in Laurence Harvey, even when nobody else did. Especially when nobody else did.”
“Most people imagined they knew and understood Larry with little trouble. That was a big mistake. They didn't know how deep and complex, how elusive, he remained behind his social mask.” - Paulene Stone, his wife
“I cannot yield to failure, it would make far too many people happy.”
#i care him (obscure actor nobody is talking about)#idk man i felt inspired to make this and ive been working on it for the past several hours at my job. i wish it was my job#so-called free thinkers when they remember a guy. anyway!#the first gif is from the wonderful world of the brothers grimm and we're lucky i was able to even get it bc its GONE from tubi 💔#fortunately i got it from some clip on youtube abt the restoration but i had to include something from that movie#with a vague theme in these gifs of lesser known. appearances. i guess#the second is from when a bunch of actors went to this birthday celebration for noel coward#the next is from password (his silly little mannerisms and the lady's eyebrow raise at the end is killing me)#and then celebrity bowling followed by columbo and then lastly welcome to arrow beach#for those of you if any that cared where these all came from#i just think he's neat (guy that i would like to make a documentary on)#and well he deserved a good gifset. maybe ill even make more . it could happen#you should all still watch the wonderful world of the brothers grimm. just maybe not some of his other movies ive suffered through#the columbo gif could look better but for some reason the gif maker made all the colors suck :( and thats the best it was gonna look#it was a battle against source quality and tumblrs gif size limit#i also considered making other gifs but you know what im happy w six (i don't have the patience to do more)#that post thats going around of like you have to follow people that are obsessed w old hollywood actors. im doing my part#youd love him. he was a bisexual sarcastic bitch . and i also think hes 😵‍💫 but that was probably obvious#laurence harvey#not bothering 2 tag the movies#happy larry day. which inspired all this
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digitalcarcrash · 2 months ago
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was abt to make a joke like "im like johnny berchtold if he was gay" and then i remembered
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moongothic · 9 months ago
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May I ask for married lizards head cannons (Dragon x Crocodile)
Unfortunately, honestly, I don't really have Dragodile headcanons at all, mainly because we know so little about Dragon it's kind of hard for me to imagine what he'd be like in a relationship with anyone, let alone with the meanest reptile on the planet
Aside from Dragon being the worst lay Crocodile ever had but to be fair that is at least 38% a joke headcanon
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