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btw. drops this here because life is getting very uh rough
#i can also give examples of what my naughty art looks like elsewhere bc tumblr is the way it is#but if u want ur oc kissing papa emeritus all sloppy in my style. here#DMs r always open xoxo#open commissions#ghost bc#uhhhh#insert relevant tags idk ill draw tf2 yaoi as well since that's what my comms originally were two yrs ago HAHA#my art
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get the digitalized and original versions of these drawings i did today!! + Two other doodle pages!
#I really gotta get better at drawing them#for example ITS BOTHERING ME SO MUCH how in the first slide Deadpool's legs start too soon#i should have lowered the opening juuust a bit#but other than that I think they've turned out nicely!!#Also ignore how Deadpool's design looks cuz. I just kinda mixed some refs i found CAUSE I SWEAR THEY NEVER KEEP HIS DESIGN CONSISTENT. EVER#artists on tumblr#art#my art#fanart#digital art#marvel fanart#marvel#deadpool fanart#deadpool#spideypool#is that a ship tag i apologize if it is and there is literally no shipping here 💔#spiderman fanart#spiderman art#spiderman#peter parker#wade wilson
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Commissions: OPEN
Hello! I take 3 types of commissions: sketch, clean & fully colored, and digital portrait.
Sketches:
Simple: - head: 12€ - half body: 20€ - full body: 25 Shaded: - head: 20€ - half body: 25€ - full body: 30€ Colored: - head: 25€ - half body: 30€ -> The price is per character
Fully colored
- head: 40€ - half body: 50€ - full body: 60€ -> +half price per extra character Backgrounds: - sketchy: +10 to 15€ depending on complexity - clean and detailed: +30€
Digital portrait
Black & white: 75€ Colors: 95€
General rules
- I can refuse a commission for any reason - Nudity of fictional adults is OK (if it's sexual activity it'll cost extra) - Animals are OK - Furry, Mecha and complex armors are not my expertise: you can ask but I might refuse. Complex armors have an added price equal to detailed background if in colors. (for more info: I've drawn complex armors and furry headshots before)
You can contact me via DM, via discord (elmaxlys) or by email ([email protected])
#commissions#commissions open#artists on tumblr#digital aritst#my art#given the number of examples given here relevant to the fandom I hope you'll forgive me for tagging#tokyo ghoul#long post
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Characters who come off as cold and indifferent but are compassionate and soft inside>>>>
#one good example of this is ivan karamazov#his atheism is literally defined by his inability to accept and have faith in a god who allows so much suffering in the world#plus his relationship with alyosha is so bittersweet. he's in the middle of a breakdown and he can still remember what alyosha's fav food i#the brothers karamazov#fyodor dostoyevsky#putting the tbk tag here bc this post was half-inspired by ivan karamazov#character tropes#character inspiration#tropes#writing tropes#writing#writing inspiration#writers on tumblr#writeblr#indu reads dostoyevsky#the insomniac archives
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"B-but billionaires shouldn't have to live in fear!!1!" You're so right. All that money making that poor man a target. I say we should all go help him out! It's a lot of money, though. It'll probably require a lot of people to help him move it. We should get started right away! 😊
#this is a JOKE it is humor derived from “tragedy” i have no plans methods or understanding to commit any sort of violence#seriously tho kings used to be driven mad over paranoia that someone would try to kill them#youre telling me richie mcscumbags cant handle a little on the street shooting? an everyday poverty-level threat?#why should he horde money from us if he cant even handle a problem so common it gets stereotyped to hell and back#united healthcare ceo#ceo shooting#the adjuster#luigi mangione#working class#french revolution#revolution#working class revolution#you see the joke is derived from phraing a common sentiment to sound friendly as if you are helping move furniture#while not actively threatening any particular individual#the tags such as “revolution” are simply because tumblrs algorithm works on tagging posts into categories. for example#humor#see fbi? nothing strange happening here :))))#need this joke to land or else it is getting major deleted
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If you're new to the platform, you may not remember that the year Trump was elected, there were a ton of Russian bots here on Tumblr specifically working to get him elected that were, to quote Tumblr, "engaged in state-sponsored disinformation and propaganda campaigns" and pushing a variety of fake ads and disinformation to help Trump win.
You also may not remember that these Russian sockpuppet accounts specifically encouraged people not to vote or to vote for Jill Stein or another third party because they knew it would lead to a Trump victory.
But, of course, for some mysterious (😒) reason Tumblr couldn't tell anyone they were following or had reblogged one of these disinformation accounts until after the election, when they sent a notice to each person individually letting them know they'd fallen for propaganda. So people didn't realize they'd been duped or that their "friend" was a Russian asset until it was too late.
And no one likes to admit they've been tricked. I get it. Sunk costs are a real jerk.
But when you notice how many of the people pushing a message not to vote or to vote third party are blue checks or how the algorithm on pro-Trump Twitter is favoring them by showing them even when you block the users. How these accounts are always using the same phrases every time. How quickly certain accounts pop up to comment the same things on every post with election keywords. Or how sometimes they don't even bother to switch between their pro-Trump account or their "leftist" account... please just take a moment to remember that this has all happened before and be critical about who, on these platforms owned by conservatives, it benefits most to convince you to vote third party or not vote.
In the words of super grainy Garfield...
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#i never really post about politics but I genuinely think some on here forgot or missed this whole scandal#and I have been thinking about it a lot this election for... obvious reasons#the craziest part about this bot thing was Tumblr would send you a message that told you you'd fallen for russian propaganda#and then just NOT tell you which post or account it was#so it was just like someone running by and screaming 'btw you fell for a scam but we're not gonna tell you which one lol'#good times#and by that I mean terrible dystopian times#i'm torn between tagging with all the us election tags so everyone can watch the swarm in real time as an example#and enjoying the peace of not having bots and their marks commenting the same variations of their pre-set expressions over and over#tumblr
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In the spirit of the holiday season, I'm holding my first-ever Tumblr raffle!
The winner will get a commission of their choice for free, and they'll be able to choose from any of my usual commission options (including the reference sheets.) All my usual commission terms of service re: what I will and won't draw will still apply, so just to let you know, I only take commissions for furry characters. The completion time may be different than it is for my usual commissions.
To enter:
Follow my blog
Reblog this post once (likes don't count as an entry for this raffle)
Raffle terms:
All my regular commission TOS apply (no commercial use without the license, no using the art to train AI, I won't draw NSFW/suggestive/gore/violence or non-furry characters)
I'll allow one of each add-on for whatever commission listing is chosen (i.e. one extra character, one extra outfit, etc.)
You'll have the right to re-upload the artwork anywhere you like i.e. sites like Toyhouse, Artfight, Characterhub as long as you don't remove/blur the digital credit/watermark
I'll have the right to use the artwork as an example of my work on social media, in portfolios, and in commission listings
That's it! When the raffle ends, I'll use a random number generator to declare the winner. I'll tag them in the post, and from there they can DM me about what they would like for their commission. The raffle will be over on 1/20 (to allow time for entries and time for me to complete the winner's rewards for another raffle I held.)
Good luck!
(More examples below the read-more)
#you can check out my blog or ko-fi for more examples of my art btw! i have a lot here#raffle#art raffle#free art#free commission#tumblr raffle#holiday raffle#my art#furry art raffle#furry art#this post may get updated#also feel free to rb for reach/so other ppl see but not enter if u want! just put in the tags that ur not entering ^^
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Man, with how vague Splatoon is about its lore/plot points sometimes, I’m very wary of people who claim there is One Definitive Interpretation of this that or the other thing. Like no, just because the game uses they/them pronouns for Captain 3 doesn't mean giving them any other pronouns is misgendering. Like, unless you have something from actual canon (ie. the games themselves or dev interviews) to back it up, then I don't think it's fair to expect people to Universally Agree With You or Else. Going "This is how I see things, I really don't like it when people see it this other way" is fine but "This is how I see things, I am RIGHT and anyone who thinks otherwise is WRONG" is not. People have different opinions. You are not obligated to agree with them, but at the same time, they are not obligated to agree with you.
#splatoon#gonna ramble about the specific example that inspired this post#(no it is not they/them Capn 3 it's more... complicated than that)#anyways#there is One Specific Person on tumblr who is#Very Adamant on how to think of callie's s2 arc#like#they insist that the hypnoshades work how real world hypnosis does#(ex they just make you more susceptible to suggestion)#when like#Canonically#we dont know how they work#nintendo doesnt know how they work#and while i do think their interpretation is better then 'oH nO CaLlIe WaS bRaInWaShEd By ThE oCtArIaNs"#i do not think they are Objectively Correct#like i get having Opinions about your Comfort Characters#(god knows i certainly do)#but at some point u gotta realize u cant just brute force everyone to see them the same way you do#and thats okay!#They Are A Fictional Character#at some point u just gotta realize#ppl disagreeing w u on said Comfort Character is Not a personal offense#anyways this goes without saying but don't harass/try to ask me who i'm referring to here#bc 1) if u frequent the tag like i do u prolly know who im talking about#and 2) It Will Not Help#this is an Everyone Problem
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feel like the global tasks sweep strat should probably be nerfed somehow. my thought would be, give each team an individual ten minute overall cooldown on global task claims. that is to say, a certain team can only claim one global task per ten minutes. say, deliver gas masks, and then in ten minutes you're allowed to deliver tea, and then after another ten minutes you can claim hot chocolate.
another teams would be able to claim a global task for bananas during this time, and their own ten minute cooldown would start.
(the global tasks can either keep their individual ten minute cooldown [i.e. after tea is claimed no one else can claim tea for ten minutes] or a slightly shorter cooldown, say 5-7 minutes)
when a global task is claimed, everyone is notified, right? if not, in my hypothetical, they will be.
then, a team trying to sweep six tasks at once would actually take sixty minutes to do, allowing another team to swoop in and have a chance to stop it in cinematic, entertaining fashion rather than tubbo having to grind resources and then log out in front of the merchant to counter this, which is boring for everyone (including the person delivering). plus, if a team cuts it down to the last second and ends up getting delayed, they physically wouldn't have time to make a delivery, meaning even being a BIT of a nuisance could be a viable strategy, even if you can't manage to kill; if you can STALL you could still wreck their plans.
that's my dream anyway idk i'm not a game designer. just think it would be interesting for most players
(i elaborate under)
red team would have to shake up their strategies, which is fun since they're a team that kinda has to rely more on strategy than outright brawn (overall the team's pvp can't be relied on unless they have carre or phil, as seen today when pierre, bad, and etoiles attacked phil cellbit foolish and baghera, and cellbit and foolish both died to etoiles in the attack, despite it being a 4 on 1 at the time. baghera was killed by bad soon after. phil was the one to get the kills. the first day, when blue attacked [niki, tubbo, and bad as i recall] carre got both kills)
the other teams would then still have a way to stop a global sweep since a sweep would have to start earlier, allowing not only more time to arrive at global to pvp about it, but ALSO allowing another team to swoop in and steal the goal out from under the team again
i'm gonna use it in a scenario bc i'm badboyhalo and i can't stop myself from making examples:
so, tonight, if the proposed cooldown was in place, bad and tubbo would both still had roughly 17 minutes when red team would have HAD to start the sweep process if they wanted all six global tasks: 1 hour until the server closed at absolute MINIMUM. more for safety's sake.
therefore, in this scenario, there's a lot to happen
blue team could wait at globals, knowing red will probably try this strategy, and attempt or perhaps SUCCEED in killing red. if they kill red entirely, the operation is a wash; red doesn't have to gear to come back from scratch and take out blue team, and even if they could, the travel time to return to globals alone would mean they wouldn't get all the global tasks, potentially meaning they don't take the lead. if blue team is unable to kill red and dies themselves or has to retreat, but succeeds in delaying red, red would face the same problem.
if red sends in all of the task items on one person, and that person dies, even if the rest survived, blue could loot the items from that person and would be able to either use the items themselves, if green is currently the owner, or could run away with the items, effectively wasting red's time and again, meaning they wouldn't get all tasks claimed even if they were able to overtake the runner and reclaim their items.
i'm unclear what would happen if red divided the task items between them since it seems like the person claiming the task doesn't have to have all (or any? again, unclear) the items in THEIR inventory in order to claim so long as a teammate is nearby with the items in their inv (evidence: pac's vod "voltei... o que tá acontecendo no QSMP?!" at roughly 3:00:00; tubbo claims tea and tea is taken out of pac's inventory. i don't know the limits of this strategy)
blue team also has time to swoop in and steal a global task out from under red during this time. say, if red team had claimed the task for 10 tea leaves, upping the price to 15 tea leaves, and then blue team snuck in and claimed the task and set the price up to 20 tea leaves, (since the proposed 10 minute cooldown on claims would be TEAM LIMITED; red's cooldown applying to red only and so on). if red waited until the last second, they wouldn't have the time to reclaim this task even if they did have the resources, possibly forcing them to start their sweep earlier to counter this possibility, at which point team members who had logged on earlier and are out of time by the end of the night, OR members who live in time zones that don't allow them to stay up until server close, may have an easier shot at participating in defending against a global sweep.
all of this DIRECT CONFLICT would make for good audience entertainment and heighten the stakes of an attempted global sweep, since it would practically have to be one team defending globals for an hour while they pipe all their resources into it, knowing that if they die another team could easily swipe their task resources and use it themselves (along with the rest of their gear). it makes it more interesting, while still mostly viable.
plus it would force more strategizing for red team which is maybe just a personal plus, i just really like seeing people planning both in advance and in spur of the moment. it's really satisfying to see how a plan comes together and succeeds or fails; plus, since red team is the main team using this strategy at the moment and their main draw and strength as a team is cohesion and communication this would be completely fucking riveting for me as a viewer so maybe this is just a personal thing. but i really really think it would be fun
but again, i'm not a game designer, or a qsmp player, or a qsmp admin, or honestly even really a gamer? so maybe i'm off my rocker and out of my gourd and this isn't viable or balanced in any way shape or form but YKNOW what is this blog except putting stupid thoughts into the void and seeing if this time the void spits back hate mail so. i'm folding this into a paper airplane and throwing it into the abyss. hopefully it made sense.
k love you appreciate you getting this far, have a good week!!
(i hope your team gets a win in dramatic fashion and celebrates together!!! i hope they come together and unleash a plan so spectacular it takes the server by storm!!! i hope it's so good it becomes a vod you go back to even years in the future!!!! i hope you have a good week!!!!!)
#qsmp#qsmp purgatory#shut up vic#block game brainrot#yes it's long beneath the keep reading no i'm incapable of being succinct#i color coded the important parts though i just wanted to try to be clear#examples are my bread and butter i do programming and math they make everything easier for me to understand#god i hope this makes sense to other people i didn't ask my biological peer reviewer so idk if this is stupid or not#tbh it's just a tumblr post so i guess it's whatever if it is but i put wayyy more work than necessary into double checking timelines lol#(i didn't watch blue today sorry :/ idr if i mentioned in the body of the post but i main red team)#(their energy is just more entertaining for me personally; though i kept an eye on pac once i could multi-watch!)#anyway other team mains feel free to weigh in if i'm making weird assumptions about what the teams are capable of#heaven knows my pov is biased here LMFAO#((for what it's worth i am fully aware this means red team aren't rly underdogs anymore and i super want them to be kicked in the stomach))#((back to the drawing board; what will they do??? I WANT TO KNOW :O))#((seeing them crawling back to victory from being like two pixels on the bar on sunday was great. more of that pls))#idk i've rambled enough#long tags#ignoring daylight savings it's technically one am goodnight friends i hope this post doesn't suck hahahaha...............#OH AND IF ANYONE THINKS I SHOULD TAG SOMETHING FOR FILTER PURPOSES ABSOLUTELY LET ME KNOW#i want to be courteous but i think this post is pretty neutral in tone? but if you think it deserves a tag i will absolutely add it!!!!!
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grrrrrr..... frogs....
#I'M SORRY I'M VERY VERY FUCKING AUTISTIC ABOUT THIS FROG RIGHT NOW#HIS NAME IS FUCKING “BULLFROG” AND HE IS THE GREATEST EXAMPLE OF AN ASSASSIN WE'VE EVER SEEN IN THE ASSASSIN'S CREED FRANCHISE#HE'S FROM#Captain Laserhawk: A Blood Dragon Remix#I have friends I think might enjoy this series#I'm gonna#Fucking Kidnap them to watch this#/j#no kidnapping just pestering#They're Irl friends but don't worry they're also mentally ill#Also if anyone here knows me on Discord and wants to watch something with me#DM#I will watch this with you if we're friends#Oh this is a lot of tags#Is this what it feels to be Tumblr Enough?#I think I've evolved finally after 5 years on this hellsite
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Ok ok ok I'm not Tryna start discourse but bluestars prophecy was my first ever warriors book and bluestar will always be my favourite so I'm gonna make some counterpoints to you about her being a Smajor character
bluestar has always been led by an intense loyalty and dedication to those she loves and cares for - this includes her mum, her sister, her clan, eventually Firepaw when he joins the clan, and she has a VERY strong moral compass when it comes to doing the right thing - when she sees thistleclaw teaching tigerpaw to hurt a then baby scourge she very much discourages it and is against it
Afaik scott is Not like that, he doesn't have an emotional or love-driven moral code, he does things because they're smart decisions in the long term or because he wants to. Granted I havent seen a ton of his stuff but I have seen his limited life and 3rd life perspectives and he is very much a singular team player there, there to look after himself and well if people align with him that's great he's got allies (jimmy and Martyn) but he won't go out of his way to care for them
Bluestars defiance of starclan in the first series is BECAUSE she gave herself to them and what the warrior code demanded so much - yes she broke clan rules by having kids with crookedstar but she did everything in her power to make sure they'd have a happy life and felt terrible that thrushpelt was willing to say they were his to save her reputation. She didn't do it out of a selfish want, she only ever wanted to help her clan and those she loved, and her becoming clan leader is emblematic of that want. When she rejects starclan so wholeheartedly in the first series it's because THINGS KEEP GOING WRONG WHEN SHES TRIED SO HARD TO STOP THEM FROM DOING THAT - starclan has never cared about the sacrifices she made to keep her loved ones and clan safe, she lost her mother, her sister, her kits, her mate, literally everything, and things STILL KEEP GETTING WORSE. it's not a demand that she deserves to have everything good, it's a cry for help that shouldn't something go right after she's tried so hard???
C!Scott isn't like that. He puts himself above others and inherently believes he will get the best if he just plays his cards right, and he is good at it, he's very competent at lasting a long time in life series and getting what he wants - the ruthlessness of gem driven by desperation kills him in secret life, Martyn's complete fucking about face kills him in limited life, and I'm pretty sure it's etho who gets him out in 3rd life by luck. He doesn't plan to look after the ones he cares about, because he cares about himself first and foremost. Yeah you can argue when he doesn't get what he wants he gets annoyed, but his is less of a 'why don't I get this don't I deserve it' and more of a 'oh fuck this didn't work. Ok new plan double down on getting what I want by appeasing to people cos they're easy to read and therefore account for'
I don't doubt Scott would make a bluestar adjacent character if he made a warrior cats oc BUT his character would honestly be closer to darktail or ashfur than bluestar and that's that on that.
(sorry you activated 13 year old me's unskippable cutscene sjdjsjsjja this isnt meant to be a serious argument I just love bluestar a lot and love talking about her)
OKAY 1. this is fucking awesome thank you 2. i am going to do something new and exciting (advocate for scott instead of beating him to death with sticks) because unfortunately this bluestar info has only made me believe she is a smajor character even more.
As a general note when I talk about smajor characters as a collective here I’m referring to characters more in the realm of esmp/traffic/rats/pirates/etc, less vampire scott or necromancer scott who are intended to be villainous.
Scott characters tend to operate under a “If I am not a Good Person I may as well die” rule, and consequently abide by a strict moral code to keep themselves feeling clean. For instance: traffic Scott will never go back on his word, he will avoid dishonesty, and he won’t take from others unless he is sure that he can repay them. He will never betray his seasonal primary ally (even when they betray him first), and will often give people things just because they asked him nicely. He stakes a lot of his own identity on this, because it is through being a “good person” that he justifies his superiority (and, by extension, his own existence); in his mind he deserves the best and *is* the best because he is such a good person. When things don’t go his way, he thinks he doesn’t deserve it because he has been nothing but good, so he tries to place a reason. He often assumes that somebody must “have a vendetta” against him, even if this somebody is the world (see: him asking if limlife episode 1 boogeyman is some kind of joke played on him for not giving in to the boogey curse in Last Life.) which is very Bluestar to me, convinced that her misfortunes are a divine punishment.
This is all to say that Scott does have a strict moral code and deep sense of loyalty. Being a “good person” and devoted partner in the ways he understands it are so ingrained into what he is that I think he definitely has the capacity to be a Bluestar if he were raised being taught clan values, even if his internal systems are often built around never letting gross emotions be fully felt rather than what those emotions compel him to do.
#ive always wanted to partake in pointless character debate on tumblr#considered maintagging this but didnt want people looking at your ask weird. sorry yall we serve fucked up scott here#“But bree” you might ask “what about pearl? He wasnt a very devoted partner then!”#and to that I say: pearl isnt a person to him. and neither is jimmy. Scott fucked up with both of them and unfortunately if he is not good-#and justified 100% of the time he loses his entire identity so convincing himself that they are incompetent or crazy so that he#doesnt have to self reflect is how he gets by. he would literally rather kill himself than earnestly admit fault for anything#… huh. about the above tags I dont remember the lore but is there any parallel there with the whole bright heart thing#genuine question bc I do not remember why blue star did that and I dont trust the wiki#(Trying to space out names so they dont tag)#I really hope this makes sense btw bc I feel like I usually list a lot more examples… but im tired#I can elaborate on any point here if need be ig. I dont talk about this aspect of him often because the literal entire fandom does already#Every scott analysis post out there is about his damn loyalty… anyways yeah scotts loyalty is transactional more often than emotional but#It’s still loyalty and also. hard to draw the line between where the emotions stop sometimes because he can stop giving a fuck about—#most things on a whim. How much scott genuinely cares about something is a forever undefinable concept#asks#he is genuinely a very good ally to have usually. like jimmy was very much the exception there#he does like helping people out he does. he’s just also emotionally detached so he tallies his favors and good deeds to bring up later if—#someone he’s helped decides to go against him. If that makes sense#sorry man I just keep talking. I love this blue animal…….#thanks for the ask genuinely I love when paragraphs about characters#anyways im gonna pass out and. Shakes myself STOP ADDING MORE TAGSSS i think im so tired man
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being gifted a Nintendo switch and botw in like 7th grade is what eventually led me down the rabbit hole of discovering tma and I can't stop thinking about it
#and I have pinterest to thank for all of it#basically botw was a special interest so I went to Pinterest for everything#because I didn't use tumblr and didn't have ao3 at the time#i also lost the game for like three years so this all happened like my junior year of hs#Pinterest is where I discovered linked universe#which also became a special interest and at that point i had ao3#and thanks to ao3 i discovered the eldritch wild au#and then got into eldritch horror and fantasy#so back to pinterest I went#lo and behold that's where i find tma art under the eldritch horror tag#now im here#tma#the magnus archives#botw#breath of the wild#if that isnt a perfect example of the butterfly effect idk what is
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what makes tumblr so op and is the place i want to post things most often is the tags
it’s convenient to add additional information without making it a permanent part of the post, especially if it’s more niche in a generalized post and if you really need that original context you can just go and check the tags from both the op and other people.
also it’s like im whispering in your ear the additional information that either comes after i’ve typed out the post or isn’t relevant enough to include in the post itself
#here’s my examples#first op means overpowered#second obviously means original poster#instead of typing those out i can just clarify in the notes if i think it’s necessary#you also don’t have to tag your shit IN the post to reach the search tag#twitter be like#have you guys seen the hashtag solar eclipse#i can’t believe hashtag mcdonalds supports hashtag isreal#hashtag free palestine hashtag gaza hashtag#all in the same post like????#tags are legendary#i’ve certainly said this before#tumblr#social media#uhhhhhh
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30 Day Fictionkind Challenge Day 14
Q: What are shifts like?
A: Before I begin, I'm strictly speaking about my personal experience here, and in no way does this post serve as a universal definition. Think of this like a diary entry, not an encyclopedia entry.
Anyway, what they're like can vary wildly based on several factors. Two big ones are the kintype in question, and what prompted the shift. Generally though, a shift almost always comes with strong feelings attached, and in its own way, each shift feels like coming home.
Because this blog is for discussing my identity as Luca, I'll focus on that kintype. However, it's a bit hard for me to describe, because more often than not I'm in a Luca shift. I consider it more of a "default" state of being, for lack of a better term.
Anyway, how a Luca shift feels depends on what prompted it. In my personal experience, kinshifts are always prompted by something, and never come randomly.
Most of the time, shifts are prompted by music. Sometimes it's music that resonates with me lyrically — the words metaphorically "bring me back" to my source. Other times, it resonates with me melodically. The sound scratches my brain in a "Luca" way, and/or is a song I would've liked in-source. Sometimes, both the lyrics and the melody take me back.
Other common triggers include (but aren't limited to):
Lore drops (particularly about my backstory or time at the manor)
Any other official drops that I consider relevant to me
Fanart that aligns with my memories/noemata or otherwise touches me in some way
Analysis of my source that aligns with my own perception, or that prompts new introspection
Unrelated creative works that resonate with me from a Luca perspective
Random posts/memes on the internet I find relatable or that cater to my sense of humor
A common denominator among all of these potential triggers is that they are all callbacks to my memories and noemata. For example, my birthday reveal prompted a Luca shift, because it affirmed my suspicions about what my interests, likes, and dislikes were.
Another example of something that has happened to me several times is finding a song that reminds me of someone important to me, so I ruminate on my feelings and memories about that person, which prompts a Luca shift.
A final example I'll give is coming across a post on my dash that I feel captures my "essence" as Luca, so I sit and think about it and any specific memories or noemata it may have reminded me of. Or maybe I just find it relatable (or funny!) without necessarily being reminded of specific aspects of my source. Both cases can prompt a shift.
My response to the shift and how it feels depends on how I feel about the memories and stuff attached to it (positively or negatively). Generally speaking, whether my feelings are positive or negative, I'll probably feel pretty intensely going into it regardless, and spend the next while dwelling on it.
My negative memories/noemata associated with this kintype hold a lot of resentment and anger, so those are the most common emotions I feel during a shift prompted by stuff like that. I may also feel sadness for what I've lost or what I've been through. Or, I can feel frustration at what I didn't know then and don't know now. Feelings like hate, obsession, and grief are no strangers during these shifts.
Shifts fueled by negative emotions can feel like a stab in the chest, or sometimes it can get especially bad and feel like I'm burning from the inside. Either way, I like to make use of outlets so I'm not just stewing in it. Music is my main outlet, but I may also draw, write, or talk it out if I feel up for it. Redirecting my focus to something else entirely also helps.
From the outside, I might appear withdrawn and low-energy so as to not needlessly dump my problems on others, or misdirect my feelings. If it's nothing too serious though, I probably don't seem any different. Just preoccupied at worst.
My positive memories/noemata associated with this kintype...can honestly be few and far between (having a horror source is great /sarcasm). But, they still exist, and can still prompt shifts just like negative noemata can. Most of the time, shifts prompted by positive emotions are fueled by my love for the people I was close to in my canon (or even just amicable acquaintances with). There's not a lot about this source I can be wholeheartedly happy about outside of my cherished interpersonal relationships, so I can't think of any examples of purely positive shifts off the top of my head that don't revolve around my friends and peers. Maybe I'll come back and try to think of some sometime.
Shifts fueled by positive emotions can feel like a flower blossoming in my chest; it feels full, yet ticklish, like the petals are gently brushing against my flesh. It's comparable to the feeling you get when you're about to laugh. It can also feel like a spurt of energy too big to let out all at once, or simply a tranquil, warm fondness. Usually, I don't feel the need to make use of any outlets, and prefer to sit and enjoy the feeling. If I do use any outlets, though, they're the same ones I use to process negative emotions.
From the outside, I have no idea whether or not being preoccupied with positive noemata affects my behavior. I imagine I don't act differently, but if I do, it can't be anything bad. Perhaps the worst that can happen is that I become a bit more chatty.
Then, there's the grey area between positive and negative: nostalgia. It fits there perfectly, like a puzzle piece linking the two together. Nostalgia is a very common trigger for kinshifts for me, and feels like a potent mix of both pleasant and sour emotions. There's no way for me to describe it concisely. It's deserving of its own post, honestly.
I guess it's just a mix of the positive and negative, period. I feel nostalgia when something reminds me of or when I think about the places, people, and things I loved in my canon. Things I took pride in, as well. It's bittersweet, because while the love I hold is still just as strong today, the key difference between then and now is that what I love doesn't exist in this world. Not to mention the things I loved and lost in my canon, not just the things I lost when I began the life I live now.
Both kin and non-kin alike are familiar with nostalgia, so it feels redundant to explain or describe, but for the sake of consistency and archiving my thoughts I'll do it anyway. Shifts brought about by nostalgia feel like something twisting and wrenching in my chest. Like an itch that can never be scratched, or reaching for something that feels so close, but never so much as brushes against your hand. It's a love for something that no longer exists how I knew it. It's either forever altered, or gone altogether.
Nothing stays in perfect stasis for eternity, as much as I like to deny it. Places and times changing and ceasing to exist altogether are inevitable, so it's inevitable that your love will change, too. Don't get me wrong, it brings me great joy to reflect on the things I love, but the longing comes with the love. It's a package deal.
I suppose that's all I can say on the subject for now. I'll ruminate on this a bit more, and see what else I can write about the subject in the future. Hopefully this is coherent to anyone other than me, and isn't too redundant/repetitive.
Honestly, I went on much longer than I expected to. I thought I'd be in and out, but ended up rambling a bunch. It almost made me give up altogether with how long it dragged out for, but I powered through! If you read this long, thank you for taking the time to listen, and if you wish to share your own experience or want to ask me questions, my notes and inbox are always open. Take care!
#fictionkin#30 day fictionkind challenge#kin stuff#kin shifts#idk how many non kin follow me but i imagine the word “kinshift” rings a few bells for most people on tumblr LOL?#basically (at least for me) it's a period of time (long or short) where one's connection to a certain kintype and/or its memories/noemata#feels extra strong. and/or stronger than other kintypes one might have#for example if i say “i'm in a luca shift” it just means i'm luca as always but like. at the moment i'm really in tune with that kintype.#but i'm sure the definition varies based on who you ask. that's just my experience#may 2024 tags:#JESUS. i was stuck on this draft for months and months because it was longer than i expected#because it went on for so long i started to dislike it + second guess myself and took multiple breaks from writing it#decided fuck it and finished it just now. huzzah#anyway yeah here. hopefully this coherent because i don't have the attention span to proofread and edit more than i already have
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So when I add a tag to one of my posts or reblogs, those tags are no longer remembered, the way it used to be.
This royally fucks with how I compulsory tag everything. It’s already fucking me up and it’s going to significantly affect how I’ve always used this site. The remembered tag feature helped me keep track of which tags I used a lot, to keep my blog better organized.
I guess this also means that one brand of post we used to have, which was like “hey users type these words in the tags and see what comes up!”, are now extinct too.
This is probably due to all the spaghetti code they’ve messed with for the Twitterification update. Something broke their indexing or whatever it’s called that handles that kind of thing. I doubt it’s ever going to be fixed. Nothing on this site will ever be fixed so why would this. It just makes me... so impotently angry.
#tumblr#Tumblr update#An Example - one of the last things I reblogged was for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles#tagged exactly like that#and here I am 5 minutes later and Tumblr does not remember it
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also hi while i was talking about my ocd and anxiety during today's therapy session my therapist literally googled the wikipedia definitions of the things my brain called me to prove that it's wrong and that those thoughts don't matter
#for example my brain really likes to make me believe that i'm a hypocrite of some kind or a liar or a manipulator#and when she was talking about hypocrisy she was like#'usually people like that act nice but actually hate everyone around them but also-#believe they're better than everyone else. you don't “pretend to be nice” you're just being polite while also establishing boundaries-#and you also don't believe you're better than them your brain is just trying to protect you bc it can feel that those people are suspicious#and being nice while having your boundaries to protect yourself isn't hypocrisy it's a natural response to trauma'#and i was like '. okay'#this isn't about anyone here btw!! this is about some irl people#[ 💚 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐚 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐬 ]#edit: stupid tumblr got the order of the tags wrong..
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