#he's so tired but so fulfilled
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drawing dad ulysses again.........
#shh peri shhh#wip#ulysses#ree#elias#hani#the kids#imagine being a dad of three kids under 10 in your mid-forties lmao#he's so tired but so fulfilled
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Since the elden ring fandom has been incredibly sensitive as of late, let me put a warning: under the cut there‘s a ship art of Radahn and Miquella hugging :)
Nothing NSFW but I don‘t want people to see smth they really dislike for multiple reasons in the tags of their favourite characters lmao
Let‘s all enjoy whatever brings us delight in this game 🙏
#elden ring#elden ring fanart#elden ring dlc#elden ring miquella#miquella fanart#elden ring sote#sote#sote spoilers#er sote#radahn consort of miquella#elden ring radahn#miquella the unalloyed#miquella the kind#miquella#promised consort radahn#starscourge radahn#im a bit tired of seeing so much hate on this website tbh qq#also radahn isnt charmed here#its post-canon of like#a few centuries at the very least#where miquella struggled enough to realise he needs additional brains#and radahn kind of accepted that he still has duties to fulfill#slowly discovering each other once again
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it is very telling that average genshin players cannot comprehend seeing an actual mature, qualified leader that is actually good at taking her job seriously after meeting archons who either is still childish, clowning whimsically, or straight up incompetent.
#it's kinda funny that the best God in terms of actually fulfilling their duties to the T is the mortal one#there's absolutely nothing wrong with the other archons their flaws make their characters extremely compelling#but it's kind of insane to call mavuika bland for being good at her job as if she's still not inherently flawed with the martyrdom complex#people keep pointing out to her: aren't you tired? don't you have dreams of your own? isn't your want important too?#she's such a fascinating character yknow#mavuika#that is#she cares so deeply about the humans in natlan and she has abundant love for them and actively doing things to give natlan a better future#and yet she could NOT remotely take her own advice and wisdom for herself#you kinda have to remember not all archons are here because they want to be archon#nahida did not ask to be an archon neither did ei#and don't even get me started on furina#zhongli and venti take archonhood like parenting as expected from them but they're so ancient that they're entering their silly granpa era#focalors is the first instance we see of 'new' god doing something... godly#she is forever the punkest archon for what she did but her plan still equired a great suffering nonetheless#after all when you want to save your nation by going AGAINST the system you cannot do it without sacrificing a soul or two#which leads me to why people think it's irrational to kill off capitano when what he's doing is also punk#focalors dared celestia by returning the hydro authority to the dragon they stole it from and destroyed hydro throne#forever changing the institution that is The Seven#capitano dared ronova by giving his immortality to lord of the night and by that rewriting ronova's curse on him#he changed the rules of the ley lines forever#anyway.#narratively speaking capitano is a great foil for mavuika and I'm just glad it's him we met in natlan#hyv didn't make the short animated for mavuika just for you to call her bland
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#joker out#kris guštin#stožice live#when he yell >>>>>>>>>>>>>>#also that tired but so happy smile in the second gif literally teared me up#you go baby giraffe of a man#fulfill those dreams of yours#*my gifs
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Reasons Nie Mingjue tries to kill Jin Guangyao:
JGY saved his life (while being unable to do the same for others)
He didn't think working as a spy to win the war would actually include having to do bad things (unlike the killings NMJ performs which are always 100% justified because NMJ is 100% moral and has the right to make that call)
JGY won't kill himself
JGY won't perform extrajudicial murder of his shidi, favored by his father (which would also get him killed)
JGY won't die
JGY talked back to him and won't just completely agree with his assessment (that JGY should just die)
It's the only way for them to have peace (says the guy who suffers from extensive murderous rages and came back as a corpse to continue killing people against the guy who oversaw the biggest public safety project and expansion we know of and kept the peace for over a decade)
JGY tells their mutual friend/sworn brother that he's concerned about NMJ suffering from said extensive murderous rages
JGY bought nice things for NHS
Reasons Jin Guangyao tries to kill Nie Mingjue
Doesn't want to be killed by Nie Mingjue who keeps trying to kill him
#nie critical#nmj critical#“nmj was right about jgy the whole time” no jgy just got tired of all the attempts on his life. self-fulfilling prophecy. nmj is dangerous#and suffering from some pretty clear violent delusional tendencies he refuses to actually treat that are actively killing him#like nmj is dying anyway by his own actions it's just jgy doesn't want nmj to take him down with him#i mean it'd be a fair assumption tbh that if nmj was in his “right mind” whatever that means#he wouldn't want that either#most people would probably want to avoid killing their loved ones in fits of rage actually#i mean he doesn't put down the saber but you get the impression that while he's in the throes of it he doesn't think it's that bad#he gets mad at jgy for suggesting it's that bad like ten seconds before he tries to kill huaisang and dies#nmj is a very unreliable narrator on his own mental state sorry#it actually is quite tragic what happens to nmj but jgy has nothing to do with it he's just trying to live and he doesn't want to kill nmj#and nmj could have saved himself but he won't. he refuses. that's on him.#and sidenote but i think that's part of the reason nhs pursues vengeance against jgy so vociferously#because if he can focus all that blame obsessively on jgy then he doesn't have to think about how it was really nmj's choice the whole time
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yall Im so fucking tired. This month has been exhausting. I promise Im alive, just barely functional atm.
#personal#rant below#begining of the month docs said dad had less than a month. Hes still around but declining#been taking care of him and my mom#along with working full time#and my boyfriend doing his damndest to keep me busy when Im not helping with dad#which is great except Im so tired#but also I havent been able to sleep much#and I've lost my appetite which apparently is a grief thing I didn't know about#So I've managed to get all the physical grief symptoms and it is taking a fucking toll#so your girl is sleeping in tomorrow and spending the day doing my own little crafts and avoiding people as much as I can#a girl just wants some sleep and a fulfilling snack but all she is being given are slight naps and unappealing food. send help.#anyways after this experience Ive decided that I no longer give any fucks because you only live once so Im just gonna do what I want foreve#and actually live life instead of being constrained by societal standards#after all this is over of course. gotta take care of dad first#also I got to paint the door because he was sick of staring at the porch. so its a lake view now#woooo#yeah so thats my life update for you all#also I saw a girl for the first time in 9 years today who completely changed the tradgetory of my life and didn't know it. so that was fun.#exhausing but fun#also idgaf about spelling right now I am running on caffeine and pure will power atm
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your perception of itafushi. my beloved. my favorite little barbie dolls that gege loves to wind up. i miss them.
like the idea of yuuji being so jealous over megumi? the sunshine himbo…losing it at the sight of megumi smiling at this perfect little asshole who is totally hiding under an anxious mess facade. there’s no way someone could have it all and their this good guy. yuuji is waiting for the day yuuta messes up i just know it.
even with yuuji finally understands their dynamic i just know that those two have subtle competitions over megumi attention. like…it gets to the point where throwing cars at each other is the norm. (cue nanami being horrified at his legal and emotional children throwing cars at each other over a child of gojo. like yes he adores megumi. but somehow this is all gojo fault. don’t ask nanami how.)
BUT THE IDEA OF THE ZENINS BEING SO YUUJIPHOBIC? like the idea of them shuddering at the idea of megumi fucking around with the vessel of sukuna? that they had to set a bounty on him just to keep him away from their precious runaway heir? i just know mai pops out to the school just to bitch about megumi and his boyfriend being like modern day romeo and juliet.
i also love to imagine sukuna being a firm zenin hater. like he’s not even willing to eat them. he firmly believes that all of them taste like shit. especially naoya.
See I just love the idea of Yuuji being jealous over Megumi but exclusively when it comes to Okkotsu Yuuta. He’s legitimately not a jealous person. He’s never been jealous of anyone before in his life. He’s deeply secure in what he has with Megumi and knows that Megumi likes him back and that there’s no need to be worried or upset about Megumi having close relationships with other people. He wants Megumi to have close relationships outside of him.
But the universe fucking bends to give that perfect beautiful bastard everything Yuuji has ever dreamed of.
It’s a new experience for yuuji. He’s not used to experiencing jealousy. He’s literally never done it before. But there’s this impossibly gorgeous and perfect man swanning around out there getting his death sentence overturned and having his curse royalty unattach from his body in sparkling globes of light and having Nanamin legally adopt him as his actual child and having Megumi be His Boy and apparently it’s universally acknowledged* that Megumi is still Yuuta’s Boy despite Yuuji going to Herculean efforts to lock that shit down. He has assassins trying to kill him because it’s universally agreed** that his boyfriend is out of his league, apparently, and his boyfriend is still someone else’s Boy.
It does not help that when the Assassin Problem first appears yuuji wants to go to Gojo and Megumi decides he cannot take that level of humiliation and suggests going to Yuuta first. Which makes Yuuji insist that no no, he can handle a few assassins. No need to bother any impossibly beautiful upperclassman about it who are apparently better than Yuuji in every way. He’s got this on his own. Nooo problem.
Megumi stares at him for three unbroken seconds and goes to ask Yuuta for advice about it, which results in the second years going off to unilaterally threaten the Zenin clan, which none of the first years ever find out about.
Sukuna absolutely does hate the Zenin clan and it’s specifically because they did not consider him when putting a bounty on yuujis head. He’s a firm believer in knowing your worth and he knows his fucking worth. Sorcerers used to have style. They used to have respect. What the fuck is this. The Zenin are not worth dog shit on his heel. He’ll kill them all.
*universally acknowledged by everyone except Megumi, who still does not know that people call him that
** universally agreed by everyone except Todo, who thinks his brother is a beautiful beautiful man that anyone would be lucky to court and that Fushiguro is a boring child with a nonexistent ass who has inexplicably bewitched a gorgeous specimen of manhood.
#sea glass gardens#Nanami is so confused and tired#he doesn’t know how Yuuta inspired so much animosity in yuuji before they ever met#for the record Yuuta doesn’t know either#he’s constantly going through it how could anyone be jealous of his life#cannot emphasize enough Yuuta loves Megumi but does not want to kiss him#he’s not looking to take megumi from yuuji#he can be Their Boy just in different ways#the Zenin are specifically yuujiphobic#look clan heads have had plenty of dalliances on the side over the years#if megumi has certain needs to be fulfilled he can find someone in the clan as long as he marries a woman within the Zenin and produces#heirs and also as long as that person is not itadori yuuji#the ten shadows CANNOT be with the fucking vessel of sukuna#pick anyone else than the idiot pink haired possessed freak pick ANYONE ELSE#megumi is. so tired.#this is his first boyfriend okay and most of their relationship consists of going to terrible movies and blushing fire engine red while#holding hands. they are very much NOT thinking about marriage or kids or whatever and megumi cannot emphasize enough that he does NOT want#to marry and have kids with his cousin or aunt or whatever. he does not want to do that. megumi in my mind treads the line between asexual#and pansexual where he just doesn’t like people as a rule except when he does. yuuji sort of is the first person he’s really genuinely into#this is new and exciting for him and he would not admit that on pain of death but he sort of just wants to have his first boyfriend without#his fucking abusive bio family freaking the fuck out about how he needs to have incest children with his blood family like god this is the#nightmare scenario. meanwhile I think Megumi’s the first boy yuujis ever really liked. like he’s had guy celebrities he’s thought were#attractive before but megumi was his first crush on a boy and his first real relationship and he’s sort of not got a lot of time left in#life and would LOVE it if he could spend that time holding his boyfriends hand. what do you mean he has insane bio family who wants him to#marry his mean lesbian aunt. that’s fucking insane.
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#central election ballot counting ongoing rn and it's so fucking funny#the ruling party is nationalistic + right wing and they won by a massive majority last term and they got too cocky#tenfold the Islamophobia and shit. oh and in the recent campaign the PM spoke about how he's 'sent by god himself to fulfill his mission'#i wish i was kidding... there's a bbc article on this#well yeah. so the opposition formed a coalition bloc for this election. and right now the difference in votes are *this* close#this is despite the nasty games in politics like vote buying and arresting people in opposition and kicking them out of parliament#they made some massive religious issue recently as a part of their political propaganda too but THEY LOST IN THAT AREA THIS TIME#god. the citizens are fucking tired of their shit. good for them#ngl the opposition isn't great either. and a coalition full of conflicting interests would mean an unstable government w no strong leader#so we're fucked either way#but glad to know democracy is alive and well in this country#this has been entertaining. the markets are crashing so i invested quite a bit on stocks lmao#megumi in the tags#indian elections#indian elections 2024#desi tag
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this post is not going to be very well planned out so i’d like you all to be niceys to me if i bungle the wording but i feel like the moment people understand that certain forms of bigotry stem from hatred for certain groups but can affect people not belonging to those groups and hurt them just the same is the moment a lot of our conversations about diversity, oppression, and how to combat marginalization stop going so hard in circles and start being productive
#marzi speaks#marzirants#i do think ppl are making progress#but like. with idk misogyny for example. that’s a form of bigotry i know well enough to ramble abt#there are plenty of specific types of bigotry that stem from misogyny. like… the fundamentalist idea of the power heirarchy of a household#yanno the umbrella one. god -> husband -> wife -> kids#this power dynamic leads to a lot of abuse of power which is why so many fundamentalist homes have abusive fathers#the dynamic exists primarily to elevate the man above all others- especially the woman#(children are an oppressed class too but that is a diff conversation from rn)#but it still causes suffering to the children despite it being this way primarily to diminish the woman#hell it can even cause suffering to the man if he ‘fails’ to fulfill that social role of provider#misogyny will be leveled against him and he will have his manhood called into question by his community#and this misogyny is not ‘misdirected’ in this case. it’s working exactly as intended#and once we can start to understand concepts like this esp in the contexts of intersectionality#and how different types of bigotry may look very similar but occur for very different reasons#i think we’ll be able to have much more meaningful conversations about where this bigotry stems from and what pushes it forward#and therefore the best things we can do to combat it#PLEASE REMEMBER I AM IN A WEIRD STATE RN DON’T YELL AT ME IF I GOOFED PLS. LIFE BIG AND I’M TIRED AND SCARED OF EVERYTHING COOL
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By the way, what character assassination were you talking about in the notes of my poll? I'm really curious
Was kind of talking around it there a bit intentionally but he really did dirty my boy Scrappy Doo : (
(Gunn wrote the live action scooby doo movies)
#leave him be hes a mildly annoying cartoon 10 year old like plsss#ppl associate his introduction w other bad decisions at the time made by writers and ppl in production. also his writing was bad and#overrelied on catchphrases and repeated actions hes actually good when hes in better written stuff#like jfc hes actually a really fun and interesting character concept just with not great execution in most of his stuff#like the sheer vitriol directed at him online and irl is insane. like the fact that theres a literal executive ban on using him in projects#is so bs especially when there are directors and movies where they genuinely want to use him (13th ghost of sd)#like hes literally not allowed to be protrayed positively you can only make quick meta jokes abt how much he sucks or not mention him at all#like give my boy a break he doesnt deserve this#anyways this links to james gunn specifically bc of his portrayal and that movie and starting the trend of bashing him but also bc it was#literally so unnecessary that gunn did that. like he hadnt been used in over a decade at that point and brought him back as a disgusting#creature just to fulfill his childhood vendetta or whatever. and 20yrs later he still cant be used bc of it#also a note to everyone: its late and i have to wake up in three hours to do shit so if anyone decides to start shit on my blog im gonna#block you. im tired and dont gaf i dont want to deal with 'jokes' rn no matter how funny you think they are 👍#not targeted at any one in particular just a general warning
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you know if you guys voted for stretch armstrong i probably would have shut up a lot sooner tonight
#so really this is all your fault /lh /j#i love thinking about h2o tho so im happy#VERY FUCKING TIRED THO WISH I COULD SLEEP#i think my brain is kicking into overdrive after being filled with cotton the past 3 days which. hey im glad ur back bud#CAN YOU SHUT UP NOW I NEED REST#i was just thinking because im probably not posting that essay i will summarize here (i saw#that privating it made it lose like 4 recently edited paragraphs and i don't want to type all that out again my memory isn't good enough)#it just boiled down to the pods basically making a self fulfilling prophecy by orphaning their sons and making them increasingly#desperate for connections to other people like them which is why i think erik behaves the way he does esp when ondina is around#like i am not excusing his actions in the slightest dont get me wrong here he really fucked up BUT#his last conversation with ondina before he goes to the chamber kind of sold that idea to me#how he scoffs at her saying rita says it's dangerous because she's 'old school' and of COURSE old school mermaids think all mermen are evil#and then starts adding on how he wants to do this for HER and get her home back for her by controlling it#like a bit of an add-on at the end to try and convince her#i think what he really wants is to be hailed as a hero. you know. validation and acceptance from the ppl who originally abandoned him#the OGs who made him feel like an outsider. the ppl who ripped everything away from him just bc of the way he was born (which is prob why#when he's trying to convince zac to help him he keeps bringing up their ancestors bc that's what unifies them)#i don't think he's an evil dude per se i think he thought stealing the trident stone from rita's grotto would be small peanuts in the past#once he finally got the pod to come home bc he genuinely (mistakenly) believed he COULD control the power of the chamber#i also think that's why the camera keeps focusing on his face when he's watching the others panic over#zac's sacrifice and i think he is feeling jealousy bc they are paying attention to him and not Erik#like that's not the face of someone who deeply regrets what they just did. my guy is just sitting there like 'that should be me rn'#i think that is why he also sounds so desperate to make things right with ondina afterwards. iirc he's just like 'wait no we can start ove#RIGHT?' and she's like 'uhhhh... no??????' (valid). my dude is lonely as fuck and he finally found a group of ppl like him and he messed up#big time just trying to get their attention and affection bc he couldn't just be normal abt it he had to go big or go home#like i kind of feel bad for him in a way#but i feel bad for everyone#i felt bad for denman the other day! that's how bad this is getting!!#i mean come on imagine making the scientific discovery of a LIFETIME only for all that shit to happen in a row#especially after you get your comeback. they just go right back to fucking you over again
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I was complaining about how i had to clean my old place bc im so tired and my dad was like "just go to bed now and wake up early and do it in the morning!" like wtf? u can do that? what the fuck? whats wrong with you? you can just go to sleep? hello?
#i genuinely hate people who can sleep. i literally cannot go to sleep naturally no matter how tired i am. like my dad is always like 'you#cant be going to bed at 4am and waking up at 12pm everyday.' and now i know why he gets so mad. because he literally thinks its a choice#if i go to bed too early-- TAKING AMBIEN! if i take ambien too early and go to bed too early. meaning 2am or earlier. I WILL WAKE UP AFTER#2 HOURS. and not be able to go back to sleep. do you think i dont WANT to sleep? that i dont want to have a normal lifestyle?#its a miracle i can sleep for 8 hours if all the right conditions are fulfilled!#like if i wake up early one day. i will be tired all day! i will not be tired at night or when i have to go to sleep. like this is a#physical problem that i am struggling with. and it kinda keeps me from living a normal or fun or good life honestly! how dare you
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I don't care about the long-term negative effects of chronic stress, I care about the short term one of all my dreams being horrendous and bad and full of situations that I can't win
#em overshares#this is like the 5th night in a row that i have had dreams where i set out to fulfill a task and am unable to! or the end result is off!#sang a wonderful folk song about a whale but was ultimately unable to find and befriend it#became the proud owner of a Car that is Big Enough for my Belongings but lost them all and now i live there#had terrible sex :/#helped watch someone's cat but they told me he eats plain pasta for dinner and i got sad#on a road trip with my parents and my tires were flat but we couldn't exit the highway and I got pulled over#i am sure im missing some other weird scenarios that my mind has created to make sure my sleep is as unfulfilling as being awake#anyway sorry for over sharing and mentioning sex (a thing many people do and have. except when /I/ talk about it im Gross)#oh wait no i remembered another scenario#having to have sleepovers at people's houses that i barely know so im always uncomfortable and feel bad asking for a glass of water#anyway dream Me is going through it
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the dilemma of having ideas that would be best expressed as comics but being afraid to draw
#im gonna give it an actual shot sometime soon. maybe in a sort of storyboard kinda look so i can give myself acceptable room for error#anyways. linebeck comic idea. kinda in vein with that ‘everyone on mercay knows linebeck’ had going on hang on#salty talks#i love using mask stuff with linebeck. both in an autism sense and i nthe general sense that he has multiple different outward fronts for#different situations. the idea that he lets other people decide on those masks for him and he goes along w what they might want#to see from him. not really in a people-pleasing way more in a way to get what he wants and avoid getting hurt or. whatever criticized ig#but its to the degree where his actual self is very… repressed? stunted? restless? he doesnt actually act like himself a lot and the maskin#tires him out and drives him to despise others bc he does it as a sort of defense mechanism and to get what he wants so in a sense whats#under those masks has turned into almost like a muzzled beast. hes abrasive and resentful and exhausted and just a lot of pent up nastiness#like there are times when he drops the mask and its fine (like when he does it around link in ph or. like. if hes in a good mood#but a lot of the time that pent up masked resentment is what bubbles up to the surface when hes alone and he finds ways to utilize it#this leads into the idea that all of that pent-up… frustration? with SO MUCH gets wrangled by bellum n used as motivation for bellumbeck#like. i do like the idea that bellumbeck is an awful fulfillment of a lot of things for linebeck. a chance to actually be able to protect#himself in a fight but also a brief outlet for every awful thought he’s repressed and shoved down. some of those bad thoughts being directe#at link ofc like theres a lot of envy and frustration there and it does lead to a lot of the guilt he feels afterwards. i like the line abt#him asking link if he knows he wouldnt hurt him is like him just saying that but also asking himself. like. he was forced to act on bad#thoughts yknow so then hes afraid of what that makes him even if it was forced. anyways. linebeck acting differently to get what he wants#and burying and allowing his actual nature to fester and become resentful until he finally drops that mask shit and airs it out#just some assorted linebeck thoughts here. taking whats a puddle in canon and turning that shit into a sea bc why not. this idea probably#doesnt come across in any of my current fics but i want to do smth with it going forward yknow#linebeck ideas. yippee. idk how far into ooc territory im in now and at this point i dont fucking care cuz im tired of worrying abt it
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“You can leave the church, but you can’t leave the church alone” How about y’all leave ME alone??
#so sick of it#genuinely#out here on the rare occurrence of talking with my mother and she goes off with#‘well I just don’t understand how people can live in this world and think there isn’t anything bigger out there’#as if that shit even matters#she says she’s going to pray for me#and I’ve never minded people praying for me#but she specifically told me her prayer was for me to find god.#fuck that shit#even if I thought he is real#which I don’t#I don’t want anything to do with him#I don’t want a single thing to do with him#why tf would I even follow him if I knew he was real? so I wouldn’t go to hell?#fear of punishment should not be the basis of love. that’s not love at all#I’m so tired of hearing about god#I’m so tired of being told I can’t be kind or moral or live a fulfilling life without god#I’m tired of people using their beliefs to deflect any sort of arguement against themselves#I’m so tired#tw religion#tw religious trauma#vent
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This has been such a weird time of my life because my friends are having kids and I keep violently oscillating between “aw, wouldn’t that be cute for a kid if I had one?” And “I’m single and terrified of the idea of messing a kid up”
#emma posts#this is the age my mom had me at#it turns out I was mixing up the date that happened for several years#she had me at the same age as I am now#and every time my surviving grandparents have a health scare I think ‘if I have a kid I would like them to meet’ but I know#that that’s not a good reason to have a kid#most of the time I don’t care that much#I’ve got my cat. I’ve got a lot of time for hobbies. I don’t have to worry about an entire separate person#I’m actually pretty content with that area of my life#but when I see my grandparents especially my brain starts overthinking this#my uncle never had kids though and my grandparents just seem happy he got a girlfriend and a dog#I’m the eldest grandchild on that side btw#my other grandma got to meet a lot of her great grandchildren#and I was one of the youngest grandkids so it was kinda assumed I wouldn’t have kids she would meet#but not certain considering her mom lived to be 102#or was it 101? I think it was 102. I’m really tired right now#I’m also not in a position financially to support a whole second human and I don’t even have a partner so 🤷♀️#I won’t be having kids any time soon#and most of the time I’m pretty chill about that. it’s just an occasional thing#but I’m more scared of having kids and unprepared than I would ever have to be if I did have kids#I don’t hate kids or the idea of them one day but i really don’t want them now#and I really am good with that. it’s just unintentional family pressure that got to me today#but they met and love their great grand cat 🐈⬛ so it’s whatever#I really do feel fulfillment taking care of animals and just living my life#my biggest problem rn is getting out of the damn house more#besides visiting family. going to the doctor. and getting groceries
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