#he's so malewife (he's a grown man)

[mrbrightxside]

Uh more Adult Orel but he's baking a chocolate chip thing !! Bc I felt in a bakery mood. Btw I'm so happy how much of him has been posted by so many people it was worth waiting for...

[llilyrose]

So, you know that ISAT au I mentioned in my yass-girlboss King post??

HHHHHEEEERE WE GO .... info below keep reading!!! lots of words!!!! In Stars And Time FULL spoilers!!!!!

(Note: The Reset AU will be posted on @slowlysoluminary but i will be reblogging from my main)

There are some really interesting Siffrin-Meets-The-King-First aus that float around. I see them sometime! they're great! But I, as an adoring King fan, had to sit down and ask myself:

"So, uhh, like why?"

AND I DID SOME THINKING!!!!!

The King notices you're looping in Act 3. That's great! Not for Siffrin, but great narratively. If he notices it in that loop specifically, I feel like he would notice in other loops, too.

So, Act 5. The King notices how much of a formidable opponent siffrin is (among other things), acknowledges he's from the same country, recognizes wish craft, yadda yadda yadda.

He wants Siffrin to understand and resonate with his reasons for trapping an entire country in time, and while Siffrin is busy in his mind space fighting Mal Du Pays, the King makes a wish. AND HE LOOPS!!!!!??????

... Uhh, kind of? Not really. It resets the timeline all the way back to when the country was erased, but instead of the King having full memory, they're more like... vague snippets that hint at what he once was.

So, um! The first part of the AU is about the King's 10-year-long descent into madness. It's heavily condensed but it's there!! there's lore there!! I'm a king fan he needs a backstory.

"His name is Lazare" HE HAD TO HAVE A NAME BEFORE HIS KING DAYS... it's heavily implied the King wasn't his original name, and my headcanon helpfully supplied that he underwent a Change inside the house during his rise to power. I think there's like, a Head Defender? And the King was Head Defender, with full access to all libraries inside the house, when he started going crazy.

At 22 he loses all his memory while travelling in Vaugarde. Nobody knows his name so he comes up with one! He meets Siffrin 4 years later and they both travel Vaugarde together.

He becomes a defender at 29 because we see firsthand how INVESTED this dude is in Vaugarde. He wants, NEEDS this country to be safe!! he has a lot of patriotism!!! He's not actively searching for what happened to him or his country, he's just accepted it and is building himself up as a person.

oh boy .. when he turns 31 he becomes Head Defender.... And when he starts reading higher-access books throughout the house documenting a disappearing country? He gets MORBIDLY curious. And... well... this fixation leads him down the rabbit hole that got him where he is today! Except, this time, with Siffrin on his side...?

Yup! Siffrin is here! They've been here the whole time! Siffrin watches a man he's grown to love and adore fall into the Deep End. And he would find the strength to be mad about what he's doing if it weren't for the fact he was super sympathetic!!! ugh!!! sympathy!!!

Siffrin agrees with the King... but not really? He agrees with his reasons but completely disagrees with the way he's going about it. The change from Lazare to King was gradual, but towards the end he treats Siffrin more like an object of study than a friend.

The King takes his cloak and hat to study the stitching, the King won't let him cut or dye his hair again because he wants (NEEDS) this still image of his culture, etc.

Siffrin pretends his behavior doesn't bother him (because the King goes full Mansplain Manipulate Malewife on him if he voices his dissent) and keeps sneaking away from the King using his hat-less/cloak-less disguise.

In doing so, he meets a wild Mirabelle! It becomes a habit to visit her and the villagers under this "disguise" (it's only convincing in the way that Clark Kent is convincing) and he's feeling that same friendship with them that he used to back when the King was Lazarus.

... Until the House gets frozen? And the king starts Freezing People In Time For Real? No warning? Siffrin is HORRIFIED, rightfully, and also super upset. Partly because Mirabelle "got frozen" (she did not get frozen) and partly because the king has TOTALLY LOST HIS MIND NOW. no trace or remnant of who he used to be. but siffrin wants to hold on.

and then Siffrin gets stuck in a time loop! Whoops! Honest mistake!

"How does he get stuck in a Time Loop if there's no party to stick with?" ok so. of course he's going to learn Wish Craft from the King, duh. The King tells him literally everything about rhe country as he discovers it (albeit, in incoherent rambles.). And he also has his own muscle memory to draw from!

In desperation, he makes a wish: Save Vaugarde/Sav the King.

"Which one of those two is it?" Idk! That's what he spends the timeloops finding out!

Oh, wait, now that I've talked about the time loops, I CAN TALK ABOUT LOOP!!! LOOP IS NEW AND DIFFERENT!!!

^^ This was the initial ref sheet i made while brainstorming for this au (and also the sheet that birthed King In Magical Girl Poses)

"So what's loop's deal?" yeah, um, that's the thing? Loop doesn't know either!

Loop is not hiding their identity! Much like King, they domn't remember anything until afterthe Reset. They're Siffrin, yes, but not Siffrin from SASASA:AP. They're Siffrin from In Stars and Time. They're THE Siffrin that the King's wish Reset!

Thus, Loop looks very different!!!! And acts a little bit different!!! Siffrin is the only one who can see Loop, for the time being, and they follow him throughout the loops instead of staying stagnant under the Favor Tree.

They don't like the idea of not knowing who they are, or where they're from. Siffrin sympathizes with the star, initially thinking that they just... had the same thing happen to them that happened to the king? But the reason Loop follows Siffrin through the house is because they NEED to know who they used to be, and what in the Universe happened to them. Certain things trigger certain memories, and... it certainly doesn't help that the party enters the fray.

"So was the King's wish not important?" THE KING'S WISH WAS VERY IMPORTANT.

Not only did it CAUSE the reset, but it gave King the precise tools to get a timeline that fulfilled his wish (It's not the Universe's fault he lost himself and his only chance).

BUT ALSO!! ALSOOOOOOO!!!! THE KING'S WISH CORRUPTED THE WHOLE TIMELINE.

Loops are meant to reset to the day before, with no one"s memory remaining except for Siffrin's.

This loop completely Reset the timeline.

The King kept hints of his memories from the past.

The party gets dejá vū from the moment they meet to the moment they step foot in the house. They feel like something is missing.

Loop shouldn't be here. Loop should be... Loop. Loop didn't wish to be here - it's a direct violaton of his initial wish to stay with his friends, but it's a wish that technically got overwritten when the Reset happened?

Ironically, Siffrin is the only one Out Of The Loop (hehe)

,,,,,,,,,

"okay so what's the stuff IN the timeloop?" you see. you seeeeee. I've been worldbuilding so that I can figure that out. And I still don't know..... I'm setting it up with this post so I can elaborate on anything later (asks are appreciated)

"You should write/draw about this" I am! Ao3 is llilyrose but idk if I'll end up posting anything there. Of course, my tumblr is llilyrose, too....

"You stole this from user llilyrose on ISAT discord!" um, look at my url again. thx

"What if I have questions about the worldbuilding/characters/etc." send an ask, fool.... I'd really appreciate it .....

[lvrgirl-inc]

Under the

୨ৎ Desk Support ୨ৎ

pair. Gamer Husband Satoru x m!reader

wc. 1.2k

genres. House husband, stay at home, lovesick, malewife, dinner, cuddling, clingy Toru, work from home, fellatio, hold the moan, work call, tech support, desk bunny.

Gamer Husband!Satoru mlist

𓏵𓏵𓏵𓏵

Gamer Husband!Satoru who’s been having trouble focusing on his work during the day. Letting you convince yourself that it was due to your not being there, rather than his chronic procrastination. Feeling so bad for the poor thing that you’d taken a day off just to test his little ‘theory.’

Gamer Husband!Satoru who is ecstatic to finally have you right home where you belong, reminiscing on when you used to work from home, though finding more financial advantages in going into the building itself. All at the cost of leaving your sulky husband at home to glue himself to yet another screen. Whether the purpose of it be for entertainment or work was up to fate. 

Gamer Husband!Satoru who hasn’t stopped clinging to you since you’d announced your staying for the day come next. Ushering you in to make a cozy dinner for his hard-working husband catering to his needy demands, he set you up nice on the counter, wanting you to have a good view of his ‘chefly process.’

Gamer Husband!Satoru whose hands ‘just so happen’ to brush over your thighs that were loosely crossed on the marble counter…repeatedly as he manages to find new ways each time to get his wandering paws on you. It wasn’t discreet at all, more like the exact opposite, but you allowed yourself to play into it, seeing as he was feeding you samples throughout his shenanigans.

Gamer Husband!Satoru who winds up eating with you right on the counter, nestled between the inners of your legs, braced up as your hands guided morsels stabbed through the fork up to his awaiting, open mouth. Easy enough, he was sweet talking his way through the entire meal, taking a turn or two to give you a few bites by his hand.

Gamer Husband!Satoru who murmurs things like, “You could have this everyday, y’know.” and “..Quit your job, spend all your time with me, honey. I can provide for you better than those corporates..” mingled between your breathy laughs. Sometimes you wondered how you were even allowed to get out the door with this as your homebody.

Gamer Husband!Satoru who offers to wash the dishes later, using it as an excuse to get back to his desk quicker—with you in tow. Easily hoisting you up in his steady sleeper-built arms, he brought both of you over from the pristine kitchen and back to the home office that was more his than yours. All along the way, he was cooing and acting like you’d gone off to war, died and came back to him. Ever the drama king, this one.

Gamer Husband!Satoru who sets yourselves up cozily under the plush of your comforters, abandoning whatever workload on his desktop until the morning, snagging whatever time he could with the man he’d grown to adore over the course of their marriage and even before. Work could wait. Work could always wait for you.

Gamer Husband!Satoru who drifts off after settling in with your face pressed into the crook of his neck, giving his fingers all access to trace languidly through your silky strands. The repeated motion effortlessly calmed out your breathing, slowing it down until it was almost in time with his. Legs all intertwined, blowing out, soft, warm air as you follow suit in dozing into a sated sleep. 

Gamer Husband!Satoru who has always been an early riser, making your breakfast as usual but already back at his desk, typing away at some unknown project, leaving you to sit upright and pull the faintest of pouts. His headphones were snug on his head and he was yammering away on a work call about whatever it was he was looking at on his screen. And oh, did this seem like the best idea you’d had in a while.

Gamer Husband!Satoru whose resolve and work façade faded fast as ever when you’d gotten up under him, holding a finger up to your lips with the cutest hint of mischief in your expression. Tucked neatly between his legs, you listened to the hitch in his breath when you’d undone his fly, effectively wettening up his boxers with your featherlight kisses and licks over the fabric.

Gamer Husband!Satoru who had to make a decision based on which ratio his multi-tasking should go in—you, trying to or already, rather, working through his pants or the support worker on the other end of the line. Ultimately, it came to a not-so straight 50/50, where he stammered out something like, “U-uh yeah, ‘m listening. Just..confused a bit on the..workings of this thing..” playing off—a tad poorly—the sensation of your lips already taking the pink, flushed tip of him up in between. Tongue licking and flicking along that sensitive, leaking slit there, giving a few more playful sucks before taking him deeper.

Gamer Husband!Satoru whose hand came to thread through your hair, leaning back with his phone now tucked between his shoulder and ear as he bit his bottom lip, smiling faintly as your expert and familiar heat felt him out. Head rolling a bit, his fingers tightened and he got a little carried away, seeing how he started to make his own rhythm. That near-smug smile quickly shifted into a slight ‘o’ forming with his barely hung lips. 

Gamer Husband!Satoru whose veins you could already feel pulsing against your tongue as he worked himself up to the crest in your waiting mouth. “Yeah, yeah..uhuh, I..I got it. F-for sure…thanks,” he’d rushed, trying to get the assistant off the line before he blew his load down your throat. What would HR think?

Gamer Husband!Satoru who got a flutter in his chest when the line finally went dead, properly looking down at you and bringing his other hand into the mix. Deepthroating him now, your eyes were forced into a teary squint and you could only hear his breathy, whiny encouragements. “Nghh..~ Fuck yes, babe..” he’d panted out, smiling back down on you once more. “So glad I m-married you, married this..ugh..slutty fuckin’ mouth…” simply just babbling, as he usually did when he got close enough.

Gamer Husband!Satoru who started borderline whimpering when you swallowed around him, with your nose smushed up against his pelvis, eliciting a choppy groan of satisfaction and a few rounds of gasping, “I’m cumming, fuck,” as he rode out his climax inside your throat. Rope after rope of his load coming freely and making you fall slack into his lap with a couple reverberating moans and gags around his erupting shaft.

Gamer Husband!Satoru whose cum slides easily down with a resounding, greedy gulp from you, ending with his cock slipping out of your mouth, slick with a mess of your combined fluids. Slumping back in his cushioned chair, leaning down to kiss your spit-swollen lips, not only getting a taste for you but of the remnants of his own release on your tongue.

Gamer Husband!Satoru who, following getting himself cleaned up and thanked you profusely with light, lavender scented aftercare, had to eventually call back the support team. Seeing as he gathered virtually nothing that solved his problem entirely. Guess it wasn’t as 50/50 as he presumed.

𓏵𓏵𓏵𓏵

[pseudowho]

THE NATION WANTS TO KNOW, "Is Mr. Haitch malewife girldad coded??" Because he sure as hell seems so.

I mean, until we start moving away from these patriarchal, insulting terms, instead of just calling the man a 'husband' and reframing what it actually means to be a good husband who simply respects women and recognises that such patriarchal terms are, in fact, just a way to paint a feminist, advocate of a man as somehow 'female'...

...then yeah, you can call him that.

Or, you can see him as what he is: a staunch feminist who would empower his children, regardless of their gender, to be different to the generations past, and always pulls his weight at home, and gets his wife off every time they have sex because her pleasure is as important as his, and then puts the laundry away after and doesn't need to be asked because he's a grown arse man.

So while I appreciate the cuteness of your Inbox (and really, it's sweet, and I'm in no way angry with you)...how about we move away from the tainted language, and call him what he is?

A husband.

(☝️ affectionately)

We love a feminist man...but it should be 'the norm'. The term 'husband' should be assumed to mean nothing but this.

Love,

-- Haitch xxx

[thesunfyre4446]

Rhaenys reaction to Corlys infidelity is so disappointing. This wasn’t Corlys sleeping with some whore, barmaid or camp follower once. Corlys had an actual bond and prolonged relationship with this woman. He made a baby with her and then did it again. He was playing house with her and the babies for a time.

Rhaenys is now childless, she lost her 2 children- really because of Corlys ambitions. Then she sees that Corlys has 2 more children? She should’ve raged.

Rhaenys is way more passive than she and team black accuse Alicent of being. In the end there’s nothing a woman can do about her husband’s infidelity and bastards in their society like divorce. They have rights over your body, you can’t withhold sex. The only thing she is allowed is to show her displeasure and anger about the situation and fans are applauding Rhaenys for not embracing that tiny bit of resistance??

The writers fail every time they refuse to let team black have any inner conflict when they have just as many issues as the greens. Everything is solved by good faith and some self righteous speech.

Everything must be neatly packaged with a bow on top by the end of the episode, while they have TG carrying generational trauma and several ongoing plot.

I suppose Jace’s issue with Rhaenyra is solved because she told him that irrelevant ass bedtime story that will soon be lost to history. He’s now a grown man and his mother has never had an honest discussion about his father’s. There is no anger or resentment towards her for the situation she put him and his brothers in. Team Black collectively blame Alicent more for not pretending to be blind than they do Rhaenyra for making an immensely dangerous decision 3 times, 1 time was after an 8 year age gap.

Rhaena now fully accepts her claim to Driftmark died with the pretender Luke. She’s now reconsidered her original feelings about becoming a nursemaid to Rhaenyra and her father’s children (because Rhaena is never treated like family, Rhaenyra never appeals to her by calling them her brothers. Poor Rhaena has had to live the last 6 years of her life as an outsider looking in on her “family”) because Rhaenyra gave her a task to make her more pliant and agreeable like you do with little kids when you hand them a shopping list because you want them to behave and stay out of the way.

Daemyra isn’t even over, he is still tb’s tortured misunderstood devoted malewife “babygirl”. Eventually Daemyra will reunite and talk about twin flames, burning together, a dragon alone in the world or some fake deep shit like that. Rhaenyra is going to accept him back into her heart. He’ll be magically cured of his jealousy and tendency towards domestic violence because Alys sent him some dreams at Harrenhal. While on the other side you have Alicole taking the blame from the writers and the fandom for the murder of their grandchild that Babygirl- Daemon had committed, entrenched in Catholic guilt, fucking and fighting and having secret abortions.

This is why watching team black scenes is like watching white paint drip down a wall. When a team black scene comes on, I can look away from the screen, have a conversation, go online shopping, zone out a little and answer texts or scroll the socials.

They’re dreadfully boring. I saw something yesterday that I never thought I would see from team righteous. The comment section of a promo video HBO posted on IG, a lot of people who said they are team black admitting to finding team green characters more interesting because they have flaws. Saying that they enjoy team green scenes more because the blacks are boring.

literally why i'm team green. anon ATE and left no crumbs. that was amazing please let's be mutuals

[teddybeartoji]

sorry if i'm not that good of a writer, but i'm so obsessed with toji rn and the idea of a married toji that doesn't care anymore about surviving as he's safe and secure with m!reader. a roof over his head, warm food and something he's not used to, unconditional love. he's growing soft in all the sense of the word, like an overfed house cat. toji was insecure at first, something weird in him as he's not used to all of this, but reader was obsessed to see how this dream of a man is now chubby, not a dad bod, chubby and m!reader loves it, m!reader got his own personal weighed blanket.

bonus points if this is with omega toji. (but, i don't have any idea what to add here, besides the idea of pups and mama bear toji)

NONNIEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU HAVE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACEE!!!!! I LOVEEE LOVE LOVE CHUBBY BIG LAZY CAT TOJI HE DESERVES TO JUST LAZE AT HOME ON HIS COUCH ALL DAY LONG:((((((((((((( and this with a male reader too???? wooowwwwwwww my heart is gonna melt away i think what have you done to me nonnie.... i think he makes a very good malewife btw like he's home all day long while you're at work and he finds cleaning to be a very relaxing task so he's glad to do it for you. i'm literally imagining him walking around with the vacuum while sipping his coffee every once in a while, his eyes on the tv where some old rerun of a show is playing. he just loves staying at home he really truly is the perfect housecat!!!!!!!!!!!

and i think he cooks surprisingly well too. and he loves to eat. and he loves to watch you eat. so nothing brings him more joy than to welcome you home with open arms and then just immediately sit you down at the dinner table so he can gaze at you like some lovesick fool as you chomp down the meal. he gets really soft okay... the second he lets you into his heart he's a changed man and i mean that in the best way possible. it definitely takes some time but it's so so worth it bc he's gonna take care of you AND he's gonna let you take care of him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and the weighted blanket thing oh my godddd after you eat he guides you to the couch so you can talk abt your day while the two of you cuddle and it's the cutest fucking thing ever like this big ass grown man is just almost entirely on top of you, hiding his face in the crook of your neck while you ramble his ears off. he loves it sm!!!!!!!!!!!

+ oh he would absolutely love to be the mama bear i don't care what anybody else says. he loves his kids sm and he wants all the best for them,, he's building them their own little playgrounds in your garden he's having teaparties with them he's doing disney movie marathons with them he's a grump and he's the biggest softie at the same time.

[richeeduvie]

Wait what? baby Jr married?!? I can’t even imagine Roman when she starts dating let alone getting married and having 3 whole children that’s so funny to imagine Roman wants to die the moment she’s like 16 and tells her parents she’s going out on a date. At 22 when she brings home her first “serious” bf and Roman picks out his eyebrows and god only knows how he didn’t jump off a window when she announced she was pregnant.

He gets in a mood for about a day when she goes out on a date at like...17. I think it would be cute if Baby Jr's malewife nervous partner was her highschool sweetheart! I've always said she has like three friends and then her parents. A Roy through and through. But really, he just gets whiny.

He's not exactly disappointed in his daughter or scared. He's just sad. This is his baby, even when she's 80. She's like...theirs. She's Mommy and Daddy's and she doesn't need anyone else? He doesn't need anyone else but Baby Jr and her mother.

It's weird. It's sad, but it's his version of being a parent.

"Roman, please - make some small talk with him."

"I fucking hate his chin. He's going to knock her up and their babies will have his chin. He's going to take her away for chinny babies."

"Don't think that far ahead. Also, that's weird to think about. It's just one date."

Roman turns over on the bed, pillow in his arms.

"Have you fucking seen him? He wants to eat her."

"I think all fathers think every man is not good enough for their daughter."

He shifts a bit. Sits up. "No, I mean-he's fucking obsessed with her. He's probably a stalker. We should call security, hire Collin. Steal him away from Kendall. It's been years past the need for glorified suicide watch."

Baby raises a brow. "You haven't even given him more than ten words."

"You're a baby. Actual child. I don't have to. I know. He wants her badly and it's fucking disgusting. Have you seen the way he looks at her? He's going to babytrap her. That was my plan b if you weren't going to USC-I don't know what I'm saying. What the fuck?"

Baby sighs.

It's so funny. Come time, it's known the pregnancy was planned. Life was stable. She's a grown adult.

"Why did you do this to her?"

He's staring daggers into the malewife.

"Roman."

He pulls at his hair. "I was fucking-it's a joke. No, not really. I want to kill myself. My baby is pregnant. Can you just have a girl please? Please please? And name it Ramona? Romana. Thank you."

He sighs, hugging Baby Jr. She's accepted her Dad enough to know this is him supportive, that he will adore this child.

"I am happy. I'm older! Signs of life means I'm dying and getting older and I'll be a fucking grandpa. I'll only actually like...try so I can beat out Frank in that department."

Baby smiles and kisses his cheek.

"Good boy."

[kcgyatt]

HERO X HERO X HERO X HERO X HERO X HERO X MANIFESTATION HERO X HERO X HERO X HERO X HERO X HERO X HERO X HERO X HERO X

hes so attractive yes GOOOOODDDDDNESSS i don't know why i'm using the worst images to show him off but please one chance ONE CHANCE PLEASE.... he's so????? hello?????? everytime he looks at the camera i just curl my toes and giggle and allat YOU KNOW ugghhh... ur making me shy now am i that ugly..

HISS EYYESS HIS EYYESS GET THEM OFF OF THE SCREEN DIEEE PLEASE OH MY GOOSH GET OUTTT hes making me so feral what the hell. i would hit both forms to be honest. JUST OH MY.PLEASE. JUST. dont look at me like that heh!....

quit STARING QUIT IT ALREADY WE GET IT YOURE SO POWERFUL YOU CAN BREAK THE 4TH WALL JUST heh.... hmu bbg... how u doin teehee.. that fucking smirk pisses me off too please just get off 💔AUGH I NEED HIM PLEPLEPLASSEEE 3 years in marriage guys trust me.

DUDE DUDE DUDEEE HIS VERTICAL PUPILS?!>!:L1;Q1Q1L;1 HIS UNDERLASHES HIS FUCKING EYEBAGS HIS SMIRK HIS HANDS THE WAY HIS STRANDS OF HAIR FALLS DOWN STOOOOOOOOPPUR MAKING ME GO INSANE IS THAT A MULLET???????????

YOU. DAMN. hey. hi. i really like you. OH MY GOD PLEASE IM TWEAKING I NEED THIS GUY SO BADLY I NEED HIM AAURRRGH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARURURGGHH HEEUAGAH AHURURGHAHHH1920129(!@*!@) HTHISS THIS MAN THIS MAN IS SO?????? honestly why choose gojo when this man exists heh! (power scalers im staring at you please dont say gojo solos him.) OH MY DAYS PLEASE ONE CHANCE I NEED YOU.

YES. im not forgetting about him. YES. i will marry him too. YES. i will spoil him with whatever he wants. (he probably already has it) YES. im twirling my hair and giggling thinking about him. HES SO??? CUTE?? HE LOOKS LIKE A CAT?? HE JUST LOOKS LIKE ":3" NOT IN THAT WAY BUT THE FACE IS JUST SO ":3" AUGRH RHHRRR RHIS SMILE IS SO CURLED UP I CANT

LOOK LOOK LOOK HIS SO WHAT?? DO YOU GET WHAT I MEAN HE IS JUST SO???????? :3???? YES PLEAAAAAAASSEEEEE I NEED THIS MAN ON THE JOB RIGHHTT NOWW I WANNA... DUDE. he looks like a loser. maybe he is. hes now a loser. i want this loser.

its not just because "oh haha stupid ordinary guy = loser" ok it might be that case but but LOOK HES SO??? stop im gonna explode im gonna. i cant find the words. he's just so. autistic. i feel like he stims alot by snapping his fingers.

OK PACK IT UP 😭😭😭yh theres no recovering from this. a grown ass man leaping into all fours to catch a coin (MY MAN) thank god there was no one around!... yeah im the fan being served oh YEAAAHHHHHHH hes getting it no hesitation bro!!!! i wanna smooch him on the forehead like? im gonna cry why arent you real.

just open the damn soda u fucker quit staring at it. "woah... it's me." GET OUTTTTTTTTTTT hes so cute though HES SO HANDSOME im gonna crash out please just please please please bro i need you you're so GHR u make me go insane i want you so BAD WHY DID I CHOOSE A MAN FROM A SERIES THATS NOT EVEN RELEASED AND THAT NOBODY GAF ABT IT💔💔just make out with me alrdy bruh

"he's a genius he ain't fumbling allat up, he literally has a 2nd form of high importance!" and hes marrying me idgaf throw another coin near the drain and see what happens heh. i hope the series has more scenes just him messing up on some stuff.

like him doing this sick gesture then opening the can just to get sprayed by soda???? please?? i need you??? transition purposes but hell yeah please just trip again. into my arms this time pelasee.. idk what i was doing i was just thinking abt tbhx and then.. bhx.. hx.. hero x.. drools HERO X MENTIOEND LALALALLAL HERO X!!!!!!!! HERO X LOML ONE AND ONLY WIFE ARRGHH mansplain manipulator malewife or wtv they say ig

[ghostforwhat]

when you’re off of work would you please elaborate on your hannibal service top agenda,,, please my family is starving

i don’t want anyone to starve so obviously I will extrapolate on the service top aspect of Hannibal Lecter o7!! I am going to get so carried away and I apologize in advance.

Alright going to start this off by saying I do think they’re vers but only in regards to each other, I think for canon relationships, Will has a tendency to allow himself to be directed while Hannibal loves to orchestrate. With each other, though, it grows increasingly and alluringly complicated. Arguments could be made and subsequently thrown out depending on what part of the show you’re watching and post fall is an entire free-for-all because you can’t tell me two grown men survive murder-suicide via cliff and then settle into the puritanical rigidity of who tops and who bottoms.

Okay that being said, honestly i could make the case that both of them lean more toward making sure whoever they’re with is getting the most out of the encounter (maybe for different reasons; the popular trope of Will’s empathy causing a sort of blissful feedback loop and in Hannibal’s case, it stands to reason the politeness overlaps with a challenging sort of hedonism, he’s in control and playful about it) but I think that specifically for Hannibal, Will’s reactions are what he’s constantly seeking and then hoarding. Like. Will responding to stimuli that Hannibal presents is basically the premise of the show and Hannibal very clearly gets off on that, maybe not anywhere explicitly but we see shots of his pupils dilating, his gaze always caught on Will, licking his lips, all in response to Will reacting to him. It’s very rare he’s outright hungry at the beginning of a conversation or interaction, he seems to maintain a sense of aloofness until Will snarks or baits or replies or even defers and then, it’s as though he’s desperate to see more. I'm not getting into the whole them eating meals together because I'll devolve very quickly but like. just keep in mind the way Hannibal watches Will eat, as though he savors Will instead of the meal he cooked. Right. Okay. He gets caught up in Will’s responses very quickly, enraptured and almost stupid about it and trying to immediately trigger more which!! Goes hand and hand with him doing very uh lets say unique acts of service (the malewife jokes are only half jokes); the breakfasts & dinners, the driving, the caretaking. Yes all that’s manipulative but to Hannibal, that doesn’t negate that it’s still getting him the responses he wants and that’s also maybe why he’s so quick to say they’re friends because he’s viewing it as a form of relationship building and quite frankly, that is the only way that man knows how to build relationships; he sets himself up as a crutch and then breaks your leg and unfortunately at that point, for Will, for Jack, for Abigail, for Bedelia, for Chiyoh, you are too grateful to be standing that you forget he’s the reason you can’t do it on your own. The others I mentioned learn either very quickly or very (in painful irony) rudely that he is only a crutch as long as he enjoys it, as long as he can benefit from holding you aloft.

However. In Will’s case, he tries to remove himself and finds that it’s him who can’t stand and he’s immediately resentful and desperate to take back that ability, leaving another gift, another act of service, for Will to prove that he can still provide it and detrimentally putting himself on the map for Jack and Mason in the process. He’s so eager to have Will’s response, he waits at his own fucking crime scene. Will gives him what he wants and he’s too overwhelmed to respond with any sort of power or immediate selfishness, he runs again. And then. Muskrat Farms and his surrender. I feel like I don’t even need to explain why that backs up my case here, that man is so so ready to rescue and then surrender all because Will’s involved; two things he’s never done in his entire life, they essentially reduce him to this almost pathetic thing and it doesn’t give him pause at all because again, they’re acts of service whether Will wants them at that point or not. Like Bedelia said it best, he’s obsessed, he wants every reaction, every word, every sigh and curse, he’s very single-minded about getting them and he doesn’t care who he has to hurt, himself or others, to get them. Now, combine all that and the cliff scene and tell me that man doesn’t spend every second they’re in a bed together completely and utterly focused on Will and Will alone.

[okiroash-03]

Hitotsume-sama ramble (& a bit rant) I am NOT normal about this guy.. putting it in read more bc I don't want you guys be blasted with this one LOLL

I could ramble so long about the intricacies of Mah's hitotsume as well as in comparison how the other artists working with eve handled him.. how I often feel like they don't really portray it as well as Mah does (which makes sense considering Mah was the one who created hitotsume,,)

You could say Hitotsume is a paradox, from a glance he has the silhouette of a tall hatted man.. but on a closer look he only has one eye and certainly no human head or hands, he appears in the corner of your eyes as some sort of onlooker... already, he's terrifying in concept.

Yet don't let hito's looks deceive you of the abundant of whimsy-ness he has!!! he can dance and pose CUTELY, his refined outfit is not for naught! Truly possessing a gentleman disposition, little snippets of giving kindness towards others.. as well as doing mundane things with no problem...

The brief moment of comfort in the unfamiliarity is quickly pulled away again, as hito here is prone to putting his damn eye close to the screen. He too, seems to have a knack of pulling morbid tricks !? for instance he cracked a person's head, filling it with all sorts of books, while his fellow smaller zingai friends danced.. (such a surreal scene in itself, I really love Mah's work) these however does not seem to actually scar the poor lad.. as if everything was all but a nightmare

For this reason hitotsume reminds me a lot about ghosts at it's core.. (funny considering his name possibly came from the yokai hitotsume-kozo) they are mischievous but not overly malicious, it was all scary for sure! later it would kinda just felt silly? spine-chilling? to think back on, you'd go about with your day thinking of that strange encounter you will never learn or to see more of for the rest of you life. Never making sense of the intentions and felt right when you think it's just more of the instinct of the hat man (I write this in experience of my own ghost encounters) which also seems to be in line of the adam by eve movie's ending

Hitotsume is near unpredictable, the moment you'd think he'd be scary he's sitting kinda... fruity-ish.. and when you think the other way... he decided to chill in a hallway and accidentally(?) spooking a person. I think its good to note that hitotsume never seem to make himself look intimidating on purpose.. in fact he often seem to be enjoyed or amused... happily dancing along or bopping his head. The "intimidating" part really just comes to how people regard towards his "eerie" appearance, the overall mysterious demeanor, hard to read face (therefore emotions too) and especially unknown origins... but when you're a fan of one-eye characters it all becomes too endearing its sickening!!! Grown ass zingai

I have always been fond of strange humanoids, it's easy for them to become my favorite,, but God.. it's really really bad when people use them as an excuse to portray shit freak stuff that doesn't feel like it came from a nonsensical creature... and more of the artist's own intentions from a bad place. Not only that, it also feeds to the idea of strange look + behavior = bad (not talking in a moral sense)

there are sooo many ways you can portray/show that a being is weird, unpredictable, and invokes fear without needing to go into such an awfully uncomfortable territory while still make it intriguing.. this is often the case when hitotsume is drawn on the hands of some peculiar artists, even ones who worked with eve... in some aspects, it's more of how it was drawn than the idea itself...

I'm sooo late to talk about this one. ever since the eve movie came out, I have always felt uncomfortable about the bouto/mob mv (which. is why I make my own derivative story!! only really keeping the malewife hitotsume, whom adopted a kid that hates him and a cat that also hates him since it's so silly LOL.... everything else Fucking sucks though)

Using hitotsume and a citizen (that looks similar to him) to criticize society objectifying humans while also having a pretty SHITTY approach to it is... Oh.... that's gore of my comfort character dude.... the biggest tragedy that it was directed by someone I do not like for their works.... most heartbreaking thing ever

[cuntertaker]

so billy. say i hypothetically have a fic idea i sort of want to write for punk and seth but i don't know enough about seth to really write it. how would you describe that glittery man what can i watch to like Understand him

okay some important points here and disclaimer i have ONLY been here for a lil bit ! there might be more stuff im missing...

so integral to his entire character is his shield arc, in which he betrayed dean and roman to solidified his ass, and then went on to have an insane ass hatefucking situation, dean is probably seth's soulmate and i am obsessed with their entire dynamic....but seth's thing has always been the plotter, the smart one, he was the one dude who did all the planning and startegy and that is sprinkled all over his career....he got injured and then came back to rebuild and shit, he also had buddy as a fucking dog, he also ?? was the messiah so like jesus part two ?? like oh man you know he manipulates mansplains malewife but like no one wants to wife him....

RECENTLY however he has been like THE DIVA of monday night raw, he is a little shit, the plotter aspect of him does not go away, and he DOES NOT like sharing the spotlight, which was a whole thing with cody when he came back,

but the punk think seems like PERSONAL....like its on another level....

seth is overall fucking annoying,,, he's annoying and no one is fucking safe but he has GHOSTS and they HAUNT his ass legitimately i feel like this man is so haunted but he makes himself big no one can point the hole in his lil soul ever....also he is a cunt !! he is such a cunt !!!

here are SOME important moments but like for recent stuff i'd look up the cody feud he had last year, you could also look at dean/seth shit too since i feel like you can see how he has changed and grown, he pulls some bullshit like wearing dusty's fit to fight cody, his old shield outfit to fight roman, like HE IS LIKE THAT !! like i feel like i am not saying enough but also like, he is simply the biggest cunt, he has to be the loudest in the room, burn the brightest, and it seems with the punk feud he is like OH I WANNA BE THE ONE TO SHOW OFF UR STINKY ASS, but i think its because he cannot bare someone take over HIS SHOW, it's a diva vs diva momence, cunt vs cunt, there's some paralleles but also some DIFFERENCES here, i THINK THAT'S MOST OF IT BUT ALSO LIKE YOU CAN DM TO TALK MORE ABOUT IT...god this man has been in my head forever god i hate him....i love him...

[consumeroflemoans]

Azul and the Leeches for the ask game

- First Impression

Man it’s been a little bit since I’ve played through Book 3. I know I didn’t really like Azul at first. The tweels were just kind of there for me. I found them funny

It’s rare for me too immediately get attached to a character so they had to stew for awhile

- Impression Now

I love Azul with all my heart and soul and also want to punch him in the face. I know you’ve suffered a lot of bullying in your time and I do not condone it at all. But sometimes. Sometimes you need to look inside yourself and say what is it about me that’s being bullied. You are so insufferable and I love you for it

Jade, my king of manipulate, manslaughter, malewife. I’m obsessed with how he convinces people into thinking he’s the normal twin when they’re actually both equally insane. I love that he lowkey forces people to experience his special interest. He’s so silly.

Floyd is what I would be if I didn’t have anxiety and a crippling fear of failure. I was given mental illness to lock my mortal body in chains so I don’t ascend and become Floyd Leech. He bites and squeezes people, does what he wants when he wants, and makes it his life’s goal to be a silly little shit. I adore him

- Favorite moment

That scene where they go to the museum after Azul’s overblot to return three photo. It’s really one of the first times we just see them chilling and not directly trying to extort people. Also merfolk lore my beloved

- Ideas for a story

LITERALLY ANYTHING EXPLORING THE CORAL SEA AND MERFOLK CULTURE PLEASE I AN STARVED

.

I’m normal about this.

I do think it would be interesting to see Azul going back to the Coral Sea once he graduates NRC. He’s slowly recovering from his past and improving his habits like the other pverblotters. I think it would be so interesting to see him in a couple years return to the sea. I really want to see him interacting with his old bullies after returning. Maybe seeing them grown up and changed could help him heal. Or maybe seeing them being the same pricks as before could result in the twins having a little fun with them. Either way catharsis.

ALSO. I think it’s not brought up enough that it’s heavily implied the tweels’s family is part of some fish mafia?? What is that. I need it.

- Unpopular Opinion

I don’t know if I have any unpopular options about them. Tbh most of what I think about them is either canon or pretty talked about in the fandom

I think Azul should set up a side business where he lets people pay to punch him and the tweels without consequences. He would make a fortune off it

- Favorite Relationship

I mean, I like their relationship as a trio a ton. It’s probably my favorite.

Outside of each other, I think I like Azul’s relationship with Idia a lot. They have a fun dynamic and their interactions are some of the rare chances we can see Azul being Azul without actively extorting someone else. I think board game club is good for him.

Jade Trey and Rook are a really fun dynamic. They aren’t shown a ton interacting, it’s mostly in vignettes. But I really like the ‘seemingly normal if not a bit eccentric vice housewarden that that is wildly unhinged under the surface’ dynamic. They would commit atrocities together <3

Floyd has so many good relationships because he is a menace to pretty much everyone he interacts with. I think my favorite has to be his dynamic with the basketball club. Once again they’re not really shown much, but I think they’re fun. I like Floyd and Ace interactions because they would absolutely torment Riddle together

Also honorable mention of Floyd and Chenya. They haven’t met yet but seven help us the day they do, Heartslabyul is not safe

-Favorite Headcanon

Really any sort of appearance headcanons where they look more inhuman. I don’t think Azul would do it, but if the potions to keep them human are customizable enough to let the tweels keep their sharp teeth, I think they should be able to have more fish features. Give me teal tints to the skin. Give me octopus pupils. Give me markings on their skin that look like their patterns in mer form

I feel like I ramble about this too much

[deafeninggardenerpanda]

leon and carol for the ship bingo mayhaps?

GIRLBOSS MALEWIFE GIRLBOSS MALEWIFE GIRLBOSS MALEWIFE GIRLBOSS MALEWIFE GIRLBOSS MALEW-*someone shoves me into oncoming traffic before i can continue*

this might sound like an odd one for me to be insane about considering they dont have too much going on in canon besides the typical "its cute i guess", and yeah i did not care about the beast pack at all when the game came out, but theyve slowly slowly grown on me a ton. in particular ive been very insane about their+the beast packs+elfilins dynamic in the samurai novel (I KNOW IVE BEEN SLOW ON GETTING AROUND TO TRANSLATING THAT ONE LOL IT WILL HAPPEN I SWEAR BY IT) and im just AAUUAGHHH THE FAMILY EVER. what really makes this ship click for me is that clawrolines not Just your lady whos around to be paired with the man, she has her own thing going on and her and leon really feel like equals. clawroline talks SHIT in the samurai novel its great. i love her so much. girlboss. leon meanwhile is your stern and perhaps overprotective dad, but hes very soft on the inside. its great its hard to go wrong with a subversion of the stereotypical straight relationship. certified i would die for them

[mvshortcut]

@nobody33333333 After some thought, a list of mbs characters who are NOT girlbosses:

Show:

Nicholas Benedict - listen I adore him. I do. I feel like he absolutely has the *potential* to be a girlboss if he so chose. but there are many ways to be powerful and fun and Such A Character. and he has chosen the path of "quirky and sweet gay English professor."

Milligan S1 - I can't explain this as well. I feel like he does have girlboss potential in S2.

SQ Pedalian - I adore him. but he is the fandom's collective son. he needs to go to art school, not start a girlboss pyramid scheme

Reynie and S1 Sticky for the same reason. S2 Sticky could be a girlboss if he wanted.

Kate has the power of a girlboss wrapped up in Cool Uncle energy.

Isaac - minion energy. love him

Dewey - self explanatory.

One Two - Just Some Guy <333

Rowena Two and the Glenns purely because I don't like them

Books:

Crawlings pretends he is a girlboss but we all know he is a failgirl at heart. he can do both. (same for Jeepers tbh)

The children are fledglings here and are not fully developed girlbosses. Constance and Sticky in Riddle of Ages are girlbosses. Kate has grown into a Cool Uncle. And Reynie's there too! (<333)

Tai Li (child)

Milligan - malewife and Dad energy. not necessarily a girlboss, although he does have a sense of power and awe. he could be a girlboss if he tried though

Ledroptha Curtain - @plzleavemealonethx suggested this, and I quite agree. he is a grumpy old man and a loser. he doesn't even deserve the failgirl title. the only reason I briefly considered putting him on here is because I genuinely think calling him a "girlboss" to his face would make him explode on the spot. and that would make me very happy <3

Mr. Gaines and Mr. Bane because they suck

Ok book version now:

(Show version here lol)

[jrueships]

jaren's :-D !!!!!!!!

[cebwrites]

May I ask for some jealous headcannons for law, croc and zoro with bimbo s/o (hopefully I said that right :) how ppl find them really pretty and give them free things all the time (flowers,books,food) when their shopping together (*´∀｀) 

a/n: haiii, this concept really interested me - it is however stated in my rules that i don't typically write fem reader as mentioned though, i did like the idea so i wrote it through a masc pov instead (。・・)ノ

with a partner who receives a lot of gifts (Law, Crocodile, Zoro)

masc reader, he/they law word count: 1k

Law

Oh such a pity he'd fallen for a man so pretty

They aren't particularly fond of it but if this is the price to pay for having you by his side, so be it, but more importantly - mansplain, manipulate, malewife those pockets dry, darlin'

It was cute at first, to see them subtly pout and bristle whenever someone approached you with flowers, offers for drinks, or hawkers giving you an excess of free samples whenever the two of you passed by their stalls; it made you feel special, desired

However, the moment a lightbulb went off underneath your captain's scheming little mushroom hat, the fun slowly but surely started to dwindle; you knew something was up immediately when Law flashed you that crooked smirk, an expression you were more than familiar with, eyes shaded by the brim of their hat

It goes without saying that Law loves and does want to treat their boyfriend whenever possible, but he's also a bit of a cheapskate and if other people want to fill the role of spoiling you while he gets to sit back on full pockets well then that's just a win-win, even going so far as to encourage you to accept these gifts, too

Of course, when you give them a look and pinch their cheek after a the third or forth occasion, Law lets out a long-suffering sigh and hooks an arm around your waist - staking his claim, if you will - glaring off would-be Casanovas vying for your attention and paying for his boyfriend's meal with his own damn wallet (your turn to pick up the tab next time though, as per usual)

You will, however, still snag free food when possible for the both of you; if luck was on his side, Law would get to share spoonful's of ice cream with you between intimate glances and kisses in your personal bubble - all while he smugly watched those Romeos and their roses wilt as Law claimed you all for his own

Crocodile

Grown, malding ass man

You don't hear much of Crocodile's annoyance outwardly but it's clear in the way he gives you the cold shoulder and attempts to wins your affections back later with presents - gifts to your liking

Pretty much the only thing he can guarantee to provide you with his immense government-backed warlord wealth; but now some schmuck on the street thinks they can do him one better with their petty flowers and chocolates? Preposterous

Crocodile would give you entire libraries, spiral staircase to a comfy lair underground and all, if you just asked - he'd make you work tirelessly for this favor and hold it over your head at most opportunities, sure, but point is you'd still be getting it

The foolish shows of their affections through material goods was one thing, but what made Crocodile's blood singe with anger the most was those sweet-talkers; insipid little assholes trying to steal your love attention away from him with bullshit poems, flirty lines from a cheesy pick-up book that somehow has the gall to make you laugh at times from their charmingly awkward delivery

Pre-Strawhats and his dethroning, Crocodile had more than enough manpower and influence to simply make these people go away, vanished into the night, never to be seen again - you had half a mind of what was going on, noticing a handful of locals disappearing from your usual hangouts, but Mr. 0 was somewhat of a mansplain manipulator sweet-talker himself and surrounded by the luxury that you were, paid little mind to the semantics of these things

Post-timeskip, however, after both of you have had time to acclimate to the rough life on the sea again and shake off the lethargy from living in such comfort things are a little different

Crocodile has, surprisingly, mellowed out a little; ie he simply doesn't have time to be that ass mad about someone attempting to shoot their shot with a gorgeous man with the pursuit of infamy and power once again in his main sights - but the open knowledge that you are his man being out there yet these fools still try to push their luck does roil his stomach at times

Old habits and whatnot, no hard feelings 💕

Zoro

Honestly? He didn't pay much mind to it, not that it'd bother Zoro much if he did, though

People think his partner's hot? Fuck yeah, that just means Zoro scored with a smoke show before anyone else could and he's extremely proud of that fact

Zoro can ignore the stragglers trying to woo you with sweet words and free food is an added bonus because he knows he's free to steal bites off your plate, even though Sanji yells at you two about spoiling your meals

He knows you're fully capable of turning down some wise-guy ballsy enough to think they'd be good enough to be your potential suitor so until it's indicated otherwise, he's perfectly comfortable taking a load off on one of the benches while you leave your shopping bags with him to guard

What does make Mr. Demon of the East Blue a little antsy, though, is how physical some of these folks can get - yes, you're an adult man and a pirate at that, but the way certain people sidle up to you made the hairs on his neck stand on end and, had Zoro been more 'beastly' like his rumors implied, bare his fangs

A woman makes herself a little too comfortable on your arm, a man puts his around your shoulder in that cheesy yawning motion everyone's seen a hundred times, Zoro's immediately to his feet and grouchily saying that you have to leave with him now

It's adorable to see him getting so worked up, the ardent scowl on his face not just your marimo's resting expression and instead an active show of his irritation - you laugh it off later, easing Zoro's embarrassed flush with gentle coos while he reassures himself by running callous hands down the strong muscles of your back