#he's just kinda a loser :/

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

this is loosely based off of @emmyrosee 's messing with sukuna post bc i just love the idea of messing with your whiny baby dramatic boyfriend and i immediately thought about katsuki ! if you want this taken down lmk !

katsuki is hilarious to mess with.

you've only been staring at him for about 5 seconds when he turns to you.

"whaddya want ?" he asks with a raised brow. you're still all smiles, resting your head into your palm

"nothing." you hum, he grumbles a bit but doesn't pay it any mind. until you keep staring. he's trying to focus on his phone but you can tell he's about to snap when he starts squinting at the device.

"what ?" he grumbles, red eyes narrow at your smile widening.

"nothing !"

"yn. don't fuck with me."

"i'm not !" you giggle " i'm just looking at you, am i not allowed to ?"

you know exactly what to say to fluster him without fail every time, it's something you're most proud of when you see the tips of his ears turn a light shade of pink.

"..no."

you snort "no ?"

"shaddup." he says through gritted teeth "so what, you're just lookin' at me ?"

"yeah." you shrug "i like lookin' at my pretty boyfriend." you prop your head against the couch and sigh dreamingly to sell the lovesick act. katsuki inhales through his nose, chest puffing like he's upset and he tsks, ears and cheeks beet red.

"weirdo." he scoffs, then grabs the back of your head to pull you in and press his lips to yours roughly.

you're both breathing heavy when you pull away. he looks at you, mouth slightly agape as he heaves lightly, eyeing you from your eyes to your lips. and then he huffs through his nose like a bull and roughly pulls you into in chest, causing you to release an 'oomph !' at the force when he flops down onto the couch, pulling you with him.

"m'not pretty." he mocks your voice and you huff a laugh into his collarbone. you wiggle around and your boyfriend loosens his hold a bit so you can look up at him.

"you so are !" you argue, he won't look at you but narrows his eyes at the tv he'd turned to to distract himself from your gaze.

"nah, that's you, babe." he switches through the channels "thought you said i was handsome last week."

"you can be pretty and handsome at the same time, the proof is right in front of me." you flirt, he looks at your from the corner of his eye and his mouth curls up like he smelled something nasty when you wink at him.

"gross."

"you're blushing~" you sing, closing your eyes and laying your head onto his chest, you sigh happily when he starts rubbing up and down your back instinctively.

"go to sleep. m'tired of listening to you." he pushes your head down into his chest jokingly and you giggle. you can't see the smirk growing on his face from where your being shoved into.

you wrestle out of his hold to look at him to see he's already staring at you, half smirk on his face and he scoffs at your expression, you huff through your nose and your smile widens.

"you love me." you whisper knowingly, katsuki takes the hand off of your back to pinch at your side and he snorts when you squeal.

"unfortunately."

you yelp when he wets his lips and he captures yours in a sloppy wet kiss.

[princessbrunette]

⊹ ᜊ(ᜊ ´ ˘)੭ ♡ … DON’T SMILE ♡

track twelve of the short n’sweet series. pairing: toxicex!johnb x reader. based loosely on the song don’t smile by sabrina carpenter. this is the final drabble of the series! i hope you enjoyed reading as much as i did writing! ໒꒰՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞꒱ა

there you were again. lying next to your ex boyfriend john booker routledge in the nude, having succumbed once more to seeing him. you said it was the last time. this had to be the last time.

you’d practically dragged him through his house to the chateau when you’d arrived, only having dropped him a warning text of ‘i’m coming over’ ten minutes prior. you didn’t care to alert him any sooner, john b had no life outside of tormenting you and treasure hunting — what the fuck else would he be doing?

“have you been with anyone but me since we broke up?” you gasp between kisses as he had unhooked your bra.

“psh, yes.” he’d shrugged, pulling away to not only avoid eye contact but to focus on that fidgety hook that just wouldn’t unclasp.

“no you haven’t.”

“no, i have not.” he admits, a little too gleefully with a grin as he closes back in to kiss you once more.

that moment swirls around in your head as you lay on his bicep, still able to feel his release leaking from you. thank god for birth control, or else you’d have been knocked up by now.

john b watches the ceiling fan continue to spin overhead, barely blinking as he thinks of what to say. you break the silence first, rolling over to loom down on him.

“if you ever stop loving me i’ll kill you.”

“noted…” he presses his lips together in a awkward yet polite smile like he truly believed you might. “does that mean we’re… back togeth—”

“nope.”

you flop back down, this time on his chest — making yourself comfy. you knew you’d have to move in a minute, clean up and see yourself out, but you could enjoy this while it lasts. you didn’t need him… not really, not… all the time. you were sure you could find someone to do the job just as well, make you cry just as hard — but for now he’d have to do. you’d gone too long without begging him to be a boyfriend, why throw away all that pride now?

[puppetboysx3]

Tumblr, this ur man?

repost for onceler will come visit you at night

[papanowo]

Through out your posts you indicate that you head-canon Rex as gay, but who’s he got a crush on and or how’d he figure it out?

he likes anakin. hes not happy about it either lmao

[deathnguts]

Barty crouch jr who’s a disowned trust fund baby who still gets a monthly allowance from his mommy and invests in tech stocks probably and lives in a huge ass apartment in a nice building but it’s literally not furnished at all and he never cleans it ever and he spends most of his time on high on his pc and he’s got the gamer sleeper bod with pierced nipples and belly button and the worlds sluttiest hip bones and happy trail under his stained sweat pants and the most dead eyes under his scraggly hair that’s in desperate need of a haircut he doesn’t feel like getting but he’s getting a new tat at least once a month and they’re usually from himself because he bought a tattoo gun online but doesn’t have a license to tattoo others and he literally only goes outside to club and drink and visit his mommy because what else is there to do and he doesn’t even try to make friends or start relationships because he doesn’t care about people and why should he why does it matter and he’s literally just the most burnt out loser you ever did see but he gets away with literally everything because he’s rich and pretty

Evan Rosier who’s just another middle child in a pond of siblings to parents who have never tried to look at him so they don’t notice at all when he leaves with a shit load of their money and never comes back and they’d give him more if he asked to keep him out of the house but he would rather die than do that so he immediately gets into the shitty office pencil pushing Patrick Bateman type shit that his father and oldest brothers did but in a business that wasn’t just handed to him so he can feel like he’s made his money and therefore his life himself and he lives the rest of his life that way with a grind set around hours spent in the gym and specialized diets and crisp tasteful fashion and very demure stoic presentation of himself to the world and actively cuts himself off from everyone around him because of the mindset he gave himself through this life style that everyone is below him and waisting his time so he literally doesn’t have friends or family and barely says any words or feels anything everyday but no one can see that because he’s too far away to make out and too good at painting a picturesque image of himself for anyone to try because he’s rich and pretty

Regulus Black who has never lived for himself and isn’t starting now so he ignores the voice in his head reminding him he’s a boy and chokes it to sleep every night with his long hair and flowing dress skirts and tries to assert that by marrying the rich family friend that raised him more than his own parents (who barely even looked his way during his own wedding that they planned) right when he turns seventeen and locks himself away in the perfect white house his husband made for him and keeps trying to nail on the mask of being the perfect little wife but he just cant and goes stir crazy and obsessive and is a nightmare to be around during his rising amounts of emotional breakdowns and if it were a hundred years ago he’d probably get lobotomized but it’s not a hundred years ago so his husband (Rabastan if you couldn’t guess) tries to distract him by funding some pity studies and encouraging him to go to an old and privileged college for useless degrees he’s only getting so he’s too worn out to start fights at home but it works and keeps him civil and mostly empty and comfortable enough to continue to be a half dead powdered and pretty wife that can continue to float through life with literally no one in his life sticking around through his tantrums and bone deep issues except his husband who wants him to stay that way for convenience and everyone is h the outside looking in thinks he’s just perfect and mysterious because he’s rich and pretty

Literally just the unholy trinity in a modern, nonmagical setting as the worst versions of themselves in a context we know: closed off rich young people who are bubbling with hate but too depressed to really do anything about it and too rich and privileged to have to so they genuinely believe what they have must be good and not in need of change because they have it all right?

Anyway then one day they meet and they feel alive for the first time ever maybe and smooch and stuff woo modern rich pretty douchebag romance.

I just need something like that, soemthing that showcases their flaws and genuine awfulness without sugarcoating it but in turn shows how their love for one another genuinely brings out the best in them. Just like remembering that they’re messy bitches but their love trumps all like actually. And who cares, they look fantastic together and they have enough to own your entire bloodline, there is nothing you can do about anything they do.

[verysadlesbian]

I made a post earlier about Christian Linke's bullshit and deleted it, because I found even more bullshit while looking through twitter and that got me questioning if he was even involved in the actual writing of the show at all. At this point, I think what may have happened is: he had some of the ideas for the plotpoints, presented them to the writers of the show and went home to take a nap, then the animators and VAs filled in the blanks. All these additions, the retcons to cover up his barely veileid homophobia, the disregard to the social commentary and, overall, the disrespect to the audience, as if we're a bunch of dummies who would take anything he says as true because he's a co-creator, as if we have no capacity to think for ourselves and interpret what is shown (and other things that I'm not gonna get into, right now)... He's been pissing me off a great deal and honestly, I didn't feel this much vitriol for a creator of something that I liked since J. K. Rowling (even though she's objectively worse and I was much younger when liked Harry Potter, so there's also the nostalgia of it all, but it's like this hits the same because my love for arcane is stronger, y'know what I mean?). He's digging his own grave and we're just watching it happen in real time, it's kinda fascinating.

[jackass-jones]

Mizuki and Date though like. Imagine being 8 and your parents are filthy rich and going through a bad divorce. Your mom treats you like shit, lashing out at you, hitting you, saying she wishes you were never born all because you were behaving like a child. Your dad is more comforting, but he doesn’t do anything to stop the abuse and he spends his time invested in a completely different family, a girl who you love and look up to but he loves her more than you and it fucking shows. Then your dads new friend, some fucking bachelor in his late 20s, is just like "wow you guys are the worst fucking parents ive ever seen" and next thing you know your dad is sending you off to live with him. And it’s just a massive kick in the head cuz you go from a rich lifestyle to living in some really shitty tiny ass apartment with this guy who’s clearly never been around a child in his entire life and he doesn’t know how to behave and does a really bad job of censoring himself like he has a bunch of dirty magazines that he can’t hide very well cuz it’s literally a studio apartment and also he talks to himself sometimes, it’s really weird. He doesn’t even have the slightest clue what he’s doing

And he’s the best parent you’ve ever had

Because fuck, it all really hurts. You have to cope with having never received any love from anyone, and with the fact that your parents clearly don’t want you and can’t even be bothered to send you with anyone even kinda responsible. And this guy has a scary job with crazy hours and you don’t know anything about him and neither does he. But still, he never once hits you or tells you you’re not allowed to cry. He just gives you space and doesn’t push you to feel any sort of way about him. And sometimes, he’s even kind. He makes you some stew, even though it’s a bit chunky. He lets you sleep in the bed and takes the couch for himself, even though he complains about the massive back pain he’d never trade his spot for a second. He pays attention to events at your school and gives you your favorite stuffed animal when you make good grades, even though you called it ugly. He gets worried sick when you come home with bruises and puts on a goofy voice and trains you to defend yourself and you develop some highly deadly skills and even though it’s really abnormal, he buys you a bench press so you can get stronger. There’s this distance there, and you feel really weird caring about someone who you aren’t related to, but you find yourself wishing it was meant to be like this all along, that maybe, he’s secretly your real dad and he loves you like his real daughter

And when you say "I’m back" he says "welcome home"

[egg-but-with-style]

I swear I'll shut up after this post and go to bed but, könig is such a little werido

When you first met the man, your first thought was about what the hell he was fed as a child. You were tall, sure. But 6'10? That was a stretch.

You had expected him to be barking orders and throwing around people who disrespected him. Expect, be didn't do that at all. He just kinda..hung out? You really weren't sure how he got the title of Colonel when all he seemed to do was just stare at people.

He also seemed, oddly attached to you? He seemed to like staring at you the most atleast. Like he was taking you all in. He rarely ever speaks to you, and when he does it's usually random moments, like when you're having a conversation he wasn't even in.

You and your friend were talking about stretch marks, she didn't really seem to get it, being small and thin. But then könig pops in, his german accent thick, making the english sound a bit awkward in his mouth

"Ja, I have them everywhere. Meine mutter always told me it was a good sign."

Then he rolled up his sleeve to reveal stretch marks that were only visible when the light hit them right, a shimmery purple. It felt nice to be understood.

Eventually you got used to him and his odd behavior. Even liking it to a certain degree. Then one day he came waltzing in with, not just a bouquet of roses, oh no, it was an entire bush he seemed to have either, dug out of the ground, or pulled out with his bare hands.

He stood in front of you, holding the bush, it still having dirt fall to the floor beneath his feet. He looked at you for approval, like a cat bringing it's owner a dead mouse. You had to admit though, the color was a lovely yellowy white.

"You like flowers, Ja?" You nodded, not sure if you wanted to encourage this behavior.

"Yeah..I..I do. But...why a bush? Don't get me wrong, I like it, but..and entire bush?"

You were so incredibly confused but he just acted like it was obvious. He looked almost concerned that you didn't understand like he did.

"A bouquet would die quickly..a bush, it will keep growing them. It's a better gift, obviously."

You just nodded again, getting a towel and taking it from him slowly, like you were afraid he was gonna bite. "Thank you, könig..I..I love it. Where did you get this by the way?"

He giggled at that. You weren't sure why he was giggling. Was there something funny about asking a man where he got a, actually very nice looking, rose bush?

"it's a secret."

You decided not to ask anymore questions. Then off he went, trapezing away like a giddy school boy. Not even waiting for you to ask anything else. So now you're just left with an entire rose bush. The janitor is gonna be so upset.

About 10 minutes away, there is an old man yelling about not even being able to keep roses in this godforsaken neighborhood.

[thechibilitwick]

happy birthday shidou cheers to a unchanging tomorrow blah blah blah i hope you fall face flat into your cake

[jobycewl]

Redrew that one image of all the obey me brothers together!

[lemonberry-soda]

Do you ever think about the fact that Ted is hypersexual due to his childhood/teenage traumas or is that just me?

Like not only did he associate losing his first love forever with not being douchebaggy enough, but he also experienced the Lumber Axe and survived. With how quickly Peter was about to be murdered for looking at Ted’s old magazine you KNOW Ted probably had to deal with narrow escape after narrow escape himself. Ted literally suppresses the memory of the Lumber Axe entirely until bringing Peter to camp reminds him, and he doesn’t even take Peter with him as he runs away. He is FUcked up.

My guy went for the cat lady who cut off his fingers because sex is inherently dangerous to him in his mind. He goes for the worst options on purpose because sex isn’t safe unless there’s risk, and he goes for the best options just to lose them on purpose so they don't leave him first, as many times as possible until he's single and lonely at the wedding reception. He’s a sleazeball as a coping mechanism, and he keeps dying for it. One single safe relationship would decimate this dude, and it also wouldn’t fix him. Therapy would do wonders if he actually accepted how messed up he is. And tbh, if TInky wasn’t around there might’ve been a chance for him to recover.

Anyway another reason this dweeb is doomed by the narrative and fucked up beyond belief

[lemonlimestar]

personally, i think the fact that kon and cassie’s sense of style being so different from their original ones can be an important detail eluding to their respective emotion states after yj fell apart and how their grasping for straws for some sense of normalcy. especially with kon just gaining his secret identity and cassie’s essentially evaporating. However, instead all we got was geoff calling masc cassie “ugly” straight up and eugenics-lite plot for the anti-eugenics guy. okay.

[milolovesbmc]

“And then he takes me in his arms, and then he lights another cigarette…”

[reddieswift]

on today's episode of small details from the IT book that are extremely important to me, LOSERS CLUB HANDWRITINGS ARE U KIDDING

[sculkshrieking]

you ever consider a s scott tibbs

adam's 1st evil ex

[crypt1dcorv1dae]

I like to think that hoshina IS flirty with Kafka but in a very... Hoshina way.

He's not like "OMG let's compare hand sizes teehee" he's like "DAMN Kafka why are your hands so damn huge. Big meaty claws lol" and that's just His Way of doing the same thing cus he's a fucking goofball, and it WORKS cus Kafka is a goofball too!!! He speaks fluent goofball!!!