#he's expressing SO much emotion
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the vibes? how are they?
#he's expressing SO much emotion#which like#HOW#connor bedard#my gifs#connor bedard livestream 09.07.2024
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morning glory
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#itadori yuuji#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#yuuji#i cant even bring myself 2 b salty about No Megu part 4546768 bc oh my GOD#YUUJI RLY OUT HERE LOOKIN LIKE FALLEN ANGEL ALEXANDER CABANEL 1847 GEGE AKUTAMI THE ARTIST U ARE#we're so blessed we're so lucky this panel is ART i ran 2 open csp the moment i saw it#SO many s tier yuuji panels this chapter tbh but this. i dont think ill ever b over it#god im giddy im fangirling a little bit looking at it#i don't talk enough abt how Good of an artist gege is his expressions r masterful#it's incredible how much emotion he packs into stares n glances n gazes#and ESPECIALLY with yuuji there is so much weight and emotion and intensity in his eyes in every gd panel#king legend visionary etc etc etc does this man EVER turn it off ????#i honestly dont think i did the original panel justice its That good his gaze is That chilling#but i certainly tried my best :'> sampled colours directly from th fallen angel painting itself n it made the blues pop rly well#anyway if im sukuna im crawling back 2 him hands and knees give him back his boyfriend hes not here 2 play anymore FGHFGJSD
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Happy Birthday, Alhaitham!
I wouldn't have guessed I'd bump into you two in a Sumeru tavern.
Here to give me your wishes? Thank you, it is indeed my birthday. I just hope that today will be as relaxing and enjoyable as any other.
The signature dish here at Lambad's Tavern is fish rolls. You should give them a try if you're interested.
If you stay a little longer, you'll see a couple of other familiar faces too. They're coming over from Avidya Forest, so they should be arriving any moment.
When there's something that calls for a celebration, we meet at the tavern — that's how it's always been with us four.
#genshin impact#genshin impact updates#genshin impact news#official#official art#birthday art#alhaitham#there is no keysmash that can express the emotions i'm feeling rn.#like you people don't get how much he means to me#i love him i love him i love him#he's literally just sitting there. i'm insane#my hands are flapping so much rn but he's just there
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thinking about wolfwood (ID in alt text)
#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#from awhile ago! i forgot to upload it here i think#i realized looking back at this. wolfwood has shrunk even more. DFGMKSGMS im sorry everyone has to bear with that. short woowoo#is engrained into my bones.... but anyway. im a big fan of vash yearning if that was not obvious from my previous comics.#not to say wolfwood doesnt do the same ofc... but im just thinking about vash's layers of repression in emotions and how he holds it#all together for the most part.... and when he yearns it's not like a dopey lovesick smile or anything. his cheeks are red but he's all “:(#bc he's Shy about it. and troubled by how much he's thinking about ww. but he can't help it and even less so when ww is right there#it's a very honest expression from someone like vash i think. and wolfwood can start to tell when he's faced with it and in turn#also gets embarrassed . silly the both of them#ruporas art
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(Silence. CARPENTER tries to rally HAYWARD's spirits. She's afraid she's going to lose him.)
"All three of us - we can all go on living, Hayward. Just like you said."
#the silt verses#tsv#sister carpenter#carpenter#james hayward#audio drama#horror podcast#artists on tumblr#listen all my tsv drawings so far have been vibes based so pls ignore the inconsistencies on here alfkdsj#namely: i know carpenter uses a rifle (opted against it visually)#and then i spent like half an hour looking at iv diagrams and idk how medical care is on a plane but. listen. I'm ignoring all that#let alone with a patient you were forced to heal after being held hostage LOL#(not putting hayward in a hospital gown for the finale. i'm not. so he gets his bloodied clothes)#anyway i (notoriously slow artist) rushed to get this out before the finale#they mean so much to me!!#(faulkner voice) jeez hayward how come you get to have a good relationship with paige AND carpenter in the final season#also if you follow my main the small detail of carpenter not letting go of hayward's hands in the beginning-#was my load bearing emotional support bit of the episode you know I had to include it#the way i spent forever trying to get carpenter's expression right only to last minute decide NOT to cover it up alfsdjk#id in alt text#pls lmk if there's anything in the description i should change!#i try to keep it short but I know I ramble#tw blood#tw eye strain
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Prompt 198
Now Bruce was not expecting to reincarnate upon his death. At least he thinks he died, he’s pretty sure he did. There wasn’t any other reason for him to be a well, literal baby. Around two he thinks, which fits well with the fact that it’s around that time that babies start forming memory recall, if he, well, remembered correctly.
But while he knew about reincarnation thanks to Shayera and Carter, he’d never exactly given it much thought towards himself. Because seriously, what were the chances of such a thing as him being given another chance?
So he was quite surprised at his situation, experimentally opening and closing pudgy hands that looked well, just a tiny bit off. He’d never been that pale before, he thinks, even back when he never went outside like, ever.
He turned his gaze towards the mobile above him with a sort of idle curiosity- a mixture of bats (ha) and other trinkets he wasn’t familiar with. It also caused him to get his first good look at his parent, asleep on a rocking chair right next to the crib.
Huh. They had the same pale skin he did, albeit in the light it looked like it was slightly tinted blue, and while their hair was white they didn’t exactly look old. They looked surprisingly well rested for raising a toddler too, unless they had a nanny or something similar… He rolled over, managing to very shakily push himself to his feet with the help of the crib.
Why was standing so hard as a toddler? And why did he have his memories of everything except how he had died anyway?
His head whipped up from where they were staring at his feet when he heard a snort, finding his parent awake and standing. Somehow silently enough that he hadn’t noticed- or he was that easily distracted by the unfamiliar giddiness bursting in his chest.
“Morning little bat,” his parent easily picked him up and held him while he inwardly sighed at the nickname. Of course his bat motif would follow him into this life. A low rumbling almost caused him to jump, his body relaxing before he could fully register the sound. The… purring?
Oh.
He wasn’t human this time around.
#Dcxdp#Dpxdc#Prompts#Vlad is a young-adult dad to a reincarnated Bruce#After the hospital he drowned his despair/distress in any way he could & ended up with a baby boy#Bruce’s main suspected species of what they were was vampire before the ghost reveal lol#Bruce can’t say shit about Vlad’s thievery but he has the most judging expression for a toddler#Then he also sees his new dad develop and try to figure out powers#Vlad was terrified to pick him up when he first discovered his ghost fire#Yes this very much changes Vlad’s relationship with Danny#The reunion has 14 year old Danny meet a Very Smart 8 year old Bruce#Yes Bruce clocks teenage vigilante instantly#And look he Would try to get Vlad to stop the possession shit but as long as it’s actual assholes he can’t exactly judge#He blackmailed SO many people in his past life… he's trying Not to be a hypocrite here#Why yes Bruce IS very liminal from having a half-ghost dad#Vlad panicked more than he did when his fangs came in (Bruce has made a file about both himself & everyone he meets)#Just because he’s now baby doesn’t mean he’s no longer Bruce#At some point someone from his world might find their way to this one but that would be a very long time in the future lol#Vlad (unaware of his core being able to feel his ghostling’s big emotions): Wow raising a child is surprisingly easy
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me n moze say good morning to the world !!! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ
art by @rabbbitseason of course <3
#🐦⬛🐕 .#<-#hehe i took inspo from kai’s rb of my mb:>#MY FIRST MOEVIE COMM#this is queued#im asleep (at least i should be by the time this is posted) but it’s a mystery as to how i will fall asleep knowing i would have to#close my eyes and not actively stare at this for the rest of my life#full factory reset i really don’t know what i would even say to this 🥹 im just#things i would do for bitti : anything! i cannot think of something i wouldn’t do for her#i gave her the most cursed ref known to mankind and she came up with this im so 🥹 thank you so much … your art blows me away every time ….#i may pass out seeing him in your style … the way you did his hands and he’s so big#this is me -> ໒꒰ྀི o̴̶̷̤ ̯o̴̶̷̤ ꒱ྀི১ at this HSJDNCN aaaaaa 🥹#i will also state the very obvious and say that bitti is such a pleasure to work with ajsnxnkck ….. please im on my knees#when i saw this- my stomach literally flipped inside out and my ears were ringing .. and my heart was beating a million beats per second#if bitti’s comms were open for eternity & i won the lottery- i would commission so many mozes ….. the world would be full of bitti’s mozes.#^ though that sounds terrible for bitti … im so sorry#i swear that won’t happen i would never do that to you#he is sooooo yum in your style (severe & outrageous understatement)#but what i can do is stare at this all day#THANK YOU BITTI UEUEJJSJS 🥹🥹🥹 I HOPE UR PILLOWS R ALWAYS COLD !!!#not even aventurine’s shield can protect me from the 100000000 damage i took from this /pos#such a shield doesn’t exist in the hsr realm or the real world !!!#evie.ss#IM KIND OF ANGRY THAT I KNOW THERES NOTHING I CAN SAY TO EXPRESS HOW I FEEL !!!!! WHAT COULD I SAY >:#WHAT AN ODD FEELING WHERE I AM reduced to my knees but from positive emotions alone …#im so dizzy /pos let me stop here this is already so long omg 🥹#edit: dude /gn my screen time is gonna skyrocket because im still staring with such a dopey smile on my face ahsndnxkc gosh im happy :’) th#thank you so much bitti …. this means so much to me#i literally can not put into words how much this has made my entire year :’)) im so soft im so happy
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Rainbows (Patreon)
#Doodles#UT#Handplates#Papyrus#Sans#This rainbow is all out of order - and so many negative glows ah :0#I didn't mean for them to trend negative! They were just easier to imagine the expressions - maybe I'll take a second pass on the positives#Or in green's case the negative :')#Again in order of when I drew them so kinda all over the place haha#I wanted to go in order! And then I got distracted pft - thus started with red ow :(#Honestly I was thinking of it just being a surprise-pain more than anything lol - like a splinter haha that wouldn't even pierce him!#D'you think that eyeglows could also act like automatic word-responses? Like how we say ''Ow'' when we're surprised but not hurt sometimes#Silly haha#The second is a lot less silly-intended tho more actual pain#It's also sad to think that Sans' red would pretty much have to be sympathy/emotional pain :(#The kind of survivors guilt of not being able to shoulder more but he's so fragile! It's not his fault!#I am quite happy with both of their expressions there tho especially their mouth shapes - and how the colours interact with their eyes#Lineless colours are some of my favourites :) You can tell it's my pencils and not my pen there 'cause it's feathery hehe#For example Edgar's scars are usually with my pen and they have an almost hard-line quality while my pencils are soft :) S'pretty#Switched colours! I unfortunately misremembered what their meanings were oops lol#Well I got them kinda half-right - I like blue as skeptical quite a lot :D I think it suits them both!#Sans as wary and logical and wanting to keep distance to assure his safety and what he can devote energy to - I like it!#And Papyrus using his brother's colour to be grown up in the way that Sans is hehe <3 It's sweet#I misremembered orange lol I assigned blue's alt meaning of ''curiousity'' - orange is meant to be bravery! Oops lol#I think I was thinking of Papyrus' childlike excitement and wanting to know and be involved! Haha#Greeeeens <3 Happy boys happy with each other! I love when they're happy ♥ Interlocked holding hands hehe#Pinks! Along a similar line! I like pink as platonic affection :D And as embarrassment lol but hgg the sweetness! The care and love!#Is my bias showing lol - especially with the bros sleeping on each other haha ♪ They're both happy to know the other is safe!#Couple'a stresses - I like Sans' more I'm not even gonna sugarcoat lol his expression turned out so good haha#And the inverse for the purples! I do like Sans' face but his body :P Papyrus tho - he turned out sad and perfect :')
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Can I just say that I absolutely LOVE how ever since they all found out that MC is human and was brought here against their will, it was Lucifer who kept insisting that they shouldn't be the ones to trap MC in the Devildom. That whether they want to stay or not is a decision MC has to make themself and that the brothers should support them no matter what they end up choosing
And now that the moment is finally here, now that MC has confirmed that they indeed plan on heading home, and now that all of his brothers agreed on helping them get back, having forged a pact and lending their powers to do so—
Now that he knows that he's the final piece needed to send them back; that the lingering idea of the yet to be forged pact between them is what's stopping MC from potentially leaving their side for good, leaving his side for good—
Now that they have finally gotten to this point, he realizes something. And he's unable to live with it
And so, he goes back on his word.
He's taking that choice from them.
"I don't want to."
Lucifer's pride is what keeps his voice leveled and neutral, as if it were just another day. As if he everything was completely fine. As if he didn't feel this pain in his heart, almost as if someone had rammed a dagger through his chest over and over and over again
To most people, he'd appear to be in perfect control of his emotions—if only his gaze wouldn't completely obliterated that frail façade of his. The way his beautiful dark eyes shimmering with a hint of blood red silently plead, beg MC to stay...
Internally, he is breaking apart because he knows what he is doing isn't right. He knows that he shouldn't trap them like a bird in a cage, and yet he can't help himself. Not in this situation. Not when it comes to MC
'No'
He—Lucifer, Avatar of Pride himself—is the last thing trapping the very person that finally made him realize what his sister had meant forever ago
'I won't let you go'
How one day, someone would stumble their way into his life, and how he'd love them so wholeheartedly and so deeply that everything else would become trivial as long as he'd get to hold them in his arms
'I can't let you go'
Someone that he'd happily throw away everything for, not even considering any alternatives if only for the shred of a chance at just one last tomorrow with them
'Please stay with us. Please stay with me'
Everything.
'I cannot lose you, MC'
Even if they'll never forgive him for it.
"I'm not going to forge a pact with MC."
#obey me nightbringer lesson 34 spoilers#slipped into writing mode at some point whoops#this was such a small moment but i love it so much#it does so much for his character even tho you don't realize it at first#tho ngl his “i don't wanna >:(” kinda makes him sound like a 5yo SDJDAKFLHSLGHSD#it's okay luci we love you anyway <3 (lass mich in meine zeit zurück du hu--)#anyway i already mentioned this in the post but the way he kept his expression neutral?#THE WAY HE KEPT HIS EXPRESSION PREFECTLY NEUTRAL?!?!?!??!!?#you just know he was BREAKING APART inside#i swear sometimes i'm so soft for him#anyway can you tell i have a lot of emotions rn HSDJAKFLHSHGSG#obey me spoilers#obey me nightbringer spoilers#obey me lesson 34 spoilers#obey me#obey me nightbringer#obey me nightbringer lesson 34#obey me lesson 34#;mel's main story disscetion#;mel's analyses
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So, according to the background lore, while growing up on Kamino, if the clones had any bouts of anger or frustration, they were put into the "retraining tank" which was essentially isolation. And at some point, this just kinda manifests in the clones in not being able to express their negative feelings properly, and either pushing them down or dealing with them by isolating themselves, because those two things are the only things they know how to do that somewhat work.
The Jedi help with this, of course. They teach their men how to meditate, how to express themselves, how to deal with their negative feelings and also let them go and not let them fester, and how the clones adopt this part of their conduct as well. Meditation becomes almost mandatory. It's not strictly enforced by the Jedi, but it is enforced by the Commanders and the rest of the men, especially when Shinies come from Kamino.
(Bail and Breha have such a good and healthy way of communicating with each other that by now, when they have disagreements, they are able to work through them by talking about it and expressing their feelings to each other.
And then they have a first bigger disagreement with Fox, and Fox just. Up and leaves. And he goes to sit somewhere by himself and then comes back like it's fine let's carry on whatever else we were doing before this. And he just does this. Every time he is angry or frustrated or otherwise upset he just gets up and leaves because he doesn't know what else to do. He doesn't know what to say. He has to leave because otherwise he doesn't know what he is going to do and that scares him)
#not being able to express your negative feelings leading up to being a perfectionist and having anxiety? oh wow not projecting at all-#not having any middle ground. either there are no emotions or there are all the emotions#because how you do just a little bit emotions when you haven't learned to do any#sw#tcw#clone troopers#Commander Fox#bail/breha/fox#sorry for putting them in this again but just to illustrate that fox doesn't have a jedi#he gets therapy tho#so much therapy
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A First Kanaphan Gifset | Eyes that Speak: First as Yok
"Have you ever looked into someone's eyes and knew that person was so different than others?"
#first kanaphan#not me#not me the series#yok#first's roles#a phenomenal actor can tell stories with just their eyes alone#first's performance as yok is mesmerising to watch#so babygirl#you can see the complex emotions processing#i love him so much#you're doing amazing sweetie#he's so incredibly expressive
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how do you think goro would feel about a childhood friend!darling?
Goro Akechi has a lot of hate in that heart of his, but other than the man he hates more than anything, there are two other things he hates the most: lack of control, and vulnerability.
He needs control over situations, over people, and when he can manage it, over the course of fate itself. The Metaverse and years of hard effort into a public persona he wears so flawlessly have granted him the sort of control he desires, for the most part.
He hates to be vulnerable, hates his own weaknesses, hates them being perceived by others.
You present both.
It’s been a long time since you’ve seen him. Really, up until the point you saw his name on screen one day, you admittedly remembered him as ‘that sad boy at school I was nice to when we were little,’ and your memories of him had all but faded into the background of your life, never thinking of him much after that until he pops back into your life.
At first, you think it can’t be the same person, surely. At least until the familiar — albeit aged a bit older than in your memories — face comes on the screen. It feels quite surreal. A drastic shift from the little boy you remember angrily sulking on the playground all by himself away from the other kids, whom you admittedly talked to mostly out of pity. Still, you felt like you bonded in the end, before he got whisked away when the relatives fostering him decided to dump him off onto someone else, thus forcing him to transfer schools.
You’re happy for him. He looks very happy now, you think, his situation must have improved. He’s even living in the city now apparently, just like you.
The positive coincidences stack atop each other when you actually get to see him.
Completely by chance, not seeking him out or anything, you just so happen to be walking home on an uncrowded street, and he just so happened to be coming back from a hit, now as normalized and mundane to him as any other work-related task — and you just so happen to meet right as you each turn a corner, perfectly scenic, as if ordained by fate.
And while Goro Akechi has spent a very long time by now perfecting the art of composure, what he sees takes him so far aback that even he lets the mask momentarily slip — completely freezing up, slack-jawed and stiff with shock and disbelief. There’s a moment where only silence passes, he looks at you like he’s seeing a ghost, an expression almost like horror managing to escape his automatic efforts to keep a straight face.
You don’t notice that part. You’re too caught up in the surprise and elation, gasping and smiling and rambling on about what a coincidence it is, and—
Do you remember me…?
The shock only lasts a split second. The composure is back, the mask pushed back into place, and with practiced mastery of charm, he bounces back near instantly.
Even in spite of the sudden onslaught of emotions and memories that feels like his very soul is being stabbed at, he manages to keep up the usual Prince-Charming act of his. Says the lines expected of him, so standard you could probably guess them before they come out of his mouth — wow, long time no see, what a coincidence, it’s good to see you, how have you been, all the generic phrases and lines one should say, just like the ones you provide in return. A back-and-forth dialogue predetermined by conventions and standards of normalcy and expectation as composed by a given social framework in which all humans live. You do mention that you’ve seen him on TV — for some reason, it makes his stomach feel like its twisting, but he gives you a humble-sounding reply all the same.
All as his heart pounds so heavily it feels like it’s going to burst though is chest. Adrenaline surges thought his veins and every nerve on his body feels like it’s frozen over, an ice-cold chill that runs through his blood, a ringing in his ears, even a lightheadedness that begins to take hold, his entire body reacting in shock and panic.
You fetch a piece of paper from your bag, scribble something down, hand it over to him — his own hand moves reflexively, as if out of his control, to take it. A series of numbers — oh. Your contact. You’re smiling now, saying something about how you would love to catch up sometime. Your voice sounds far away, his head feels like it’s spinning, but he still manages his signature soft smile and voice as he gives you yet another generic reply.
Sure, that would be wonderful.
A few more lines back-and-forth that he doesn’t even remember by the end of the day, his brain essentially giving replies on an auto-pilot means of conversation. He manages to make some excuse about work, churns out a farewell, briskly walks off with a noticeably deliberate fast pace.
You feel a little embarrassed, as you walk home. He seemed in a hurry to end the conversation. Perhaps it was presumptuous to give him a contact. He probably couldn’t care less. He’s a big, important person now, someone like that has no time for someone like yourself.
…
Your suspicions are more or less validated. He doesn’t contact you.
In fact, from the moment he gets home that day, he tries to forget the interaction entirely.
There’s multiple reasons why. For one, you present a potential obstacle, a burden, a risk. He can’t afford to have you complicating things, getting in his way. It takes some time for his heart to stop racing, and that alone irritates him — why do you get to have such a reaction from him, beyond his control?
Moreover, the emotions that hit him when he saw you were too much. Dangerously intense, something he can’t allow to weigh on him, doesn’t have the time to focus on.
To be frank, those emotions were largely negative anyway. The mere sight of your face stirs up all sorts of memories from that era of his life, most of which were deeply unpleasant. There’s a deep-rooted bitterness that rises up in his stomach, old emotions he’s worked so long to suppress, and you came and dug them up in just a few brief minutes. In truth, he thought about you very often back then — he never really got to say goodbye to you (even if, he often bitterly thought, you never cared that much about him anyway), and he had to force himself to forget you over time, and yet you’ve come and undone his efforts.
And finally — the thought of you makes him feel a new emotion, one he does not like. Something like anxiousness, fear, and in turn, anger at himself and you alike for inducing such a feeling. You stand as a sort of weakness, a single unstable factor in a world where he feels like he has some degree of a grasp of control on nearly everything — you feel uncertain, unsteady, out of his reach… no, it’s not just that. You feel unsafe. You have knowledge and memories of him that no one else does, you have seen him at his weakest, and that makes him feel far more vulnerable then he can stand.
And yet, he saves your number to his phone all the same. Lets it sit there.
Most of the time, it’s easy to ignore. He is a busy person, he can keep himself distracted. Sometimes, though, in the odd hours of the night when his emotions are at their peak, he types a message, two, a dozen, he loses count — only to shake his head and come to his senses, huffing in frustration and holding the backspace down until it’s all deleted, cursing himself internally for even coming close to doing something so foolish.
You keep coming up in his thoughts, an emotion he can’t pretend is anything but yearning feels like a knot in his chest, yet the very thought of you makes him feel sick to his stomach. The conflict between the emotions is unbearable, makes him lose sleep, makes him lose focus.
You who knew him when he was this quiet, sullen, embittered child — you were nice to him, one of the only people who showed him genuine kindness back then — you who certainly knows that the charming act in front of the cameras is merely that, an act, a mask, a lie. It feels as if playing a game with one’s own cards facing outwards towards the opponent, completely exposed, laid bare. The act can’t work on you when you know what he’s really like, know his pains and vulnerabilities, have the potential to strike at the weakest parts of him.
Nor do you fall under his realm of control. The means he has for control relies on his ability to enforce it — means to kill and ruin lives. What he wants from you, though — at least, what he wanted from you back then, he won’t let himself even consider the matter now — falls entirely out of the realm of how he likes to control people, the usual purpose for which he desires the manipulation of others — power, advancement in his goals, to snake his way inside to strike.
It's all confusing. Irritating. It's outside the realm of what he has an easy way to manipulate, and that means he's at a disadvantage, that you have an upper hand, and he can't stand for that.
Still, he wonders about you. Every time a camera faces his way, he wonders if you’ll see the filming. When he makes posts to the little page he runs that the fans eat up, he wonders if you visit it too, if you’re one of those thousands of faceless followers. He wonders how often you think about him. He wonders about the day the two of you ran into each other for the first time in so long — did you go home, and look him up online? How long did you spend doing so? What did you read? Did your view of him change, positively, negatively?
And of course, he thinks about you and your life. What have you been up to, since then? Where has your path in life taken you? You probably have friends. You probably have a partner too. You’re someone who always seemed to be loved by others — he still recalls perfectly the burning bitterness in his stomach when he saw your happiness, your family, your friends, the things you had that he did not. How he resented you for it — he still does, even if he tries to tell himself such emotions are childish. Sometimes he almost thinks he hates you, even if in the end he always finds that he can’t.
And worst of all, he finds that the mere thought of you changes how he behaves.
When he’s at a lower-end news outlet interview, he doesn’t put quite as much energy in… until it occurs to him that there’s always a chance you’ll see it, and he finds himself sitting up straighter, putting in more effort into being charming and witty for the camera.
He almost says something in another interview, but it occurs to him that he doesn’t know how you feel on the matter, and he finds himself taking what was originally a strongly-worded response in his head and neutralizing it as much as possible, to avoid upsetting you should you see it and disagree with him. He doesn't even realize it until the words are out of his mouth.
You do that to him. He who has come to think of himself as so far above others, and yet you — some child from long ago who just so happened to find him again and speak to him for no more than a few minutes — influence his actions, you consume his thoughts. You control him, and you don’t even know it, nor did you have any intention to. And even though he recognizes it, even though he tries to put it to rest and forget you entirely, he can’t bring himself to do it, can’t tap the screen to delete the contact.
It’s infuriating. He can’t stand it. The fact that you do what you do to him so effortlessly leaves him seething and stewing in a rage you probably don’t even realize he’s capable of. And that much he’s acutely aware of as well. You know more of the “real” him than anyone else, you saw him in a phase when he was always pouty and melancholic — yet even then, you don’t know the half of it, don’t realize just how much malice and fury rests beneath the calm outward surface, nor how deep it runs.
He’s not a delusional sort, he’s very self-aware, and he knows how ridiculous the thoughts he’s having are — yet he has them anyway. It’s what, three in the morning, and here he is sitting on the edge of is bed, hunched over in the dark with his face in his hands, stewing in bitterness because he just can’t stop thinking about you. Yes, he knows the thought is absurd, yet he allows it anyway — allows himself to blame you, to resent you for it as if it were an intentional act on your end, to think of you as audacious, having committed some grand transgression against him.
He’s a celebrity, a genius, he has powers unfathomable to the average person — and here you are, you’re nobody, making him think about you. The more he gives in and allows himself to slip into that way of thinking, regardless of how nonsensical he knows it is, the angrier and angrier he gets, the greater the malice that swells in his chest—
—and the darker his thoughts become on what to do with you.
If he forces himself to think it through reasonably, of course, he realizes that you’ve done nothing wrong, that you’ve been nothing but kind to him, and maybe, just maybe, a part of him even feels guilty for any unwholesome, sinister thoughts run through his head — you don’t deserve anything bad to happen to you, and he’s being embarrassingly childish for such boorish, overly-simplistic thoughts like keeping you and taking you away and hurting you and making you pay. Particularly the last — you’ve done nothing wrong, nothing to deserve any harm, and in the rational part of his mind, he knows this.
But if he were to allow those petulant feelings to take over…
If he let the irrational resentment and yearning and attachment and bitterness take over, if he stopped being rational about it, if he just acted on impulses and feelings alone, then he would have something to make you pay for. To make you the object of all the negative emotions that plague him, make you an outlet for his crippling desperation and rage and affection and covet and pain and misery and yearning — yes, he could put all those emotions into you, unload that burden and force you to take it off his shoulders, force you to be something for him to have to himself and use for his own desires and ease of his pain like he always wanted back then.
Maybe he never stopped wanting that, even if he forced every thought of you to the back of his mind for so many years. It was easier to deny the yearning when he could tell himself he would never see you again. He doesn't have that to hold him back anymore — he stares at the screen of his phone that burns his eyes in the darkness, knowing contact with you is a few mere taps away.
But even back then, he wasn’t so stupid as to not realize you interacted with him because he was pitiful and pathetic and obviously troubled and you were the sort of sweet person that went out of your way to be nice to such other children. He was acutely aware of that fact, it irritated him then, it irritates him now. Yet he latched on like a leech anyway, a fact that makes his face feel hot with embarrassment when he recalls how his child self clung to you so strongly, so pathetically. He couldn’t help it. He was so weak, back then.
But here he is, spending hours of his time thinking about you — can he really say he’s less weak to you now?
It’s not as if it’s the first time he had dark thoughts regarding you. Of course, he envied your life back then, but far more than that, he envied you. To have you to himself, as if an object from which he derived happiness that should be just for him. How upset he was when you were kind to people who weren’t him, spent time with others. Even back then, as a child, you have no idea the sort of things he crafted in his head, elaborate fantasies where everyone important to you died off somehow so he could have you all to himself. Fantasies that soothed both his bitterness for you and his desire for you — let you feel pain like he had felt, make sure you couldn’t think yourself better than him, while still ending up something all for him alone to have and enjoy for himself, ensure your kindness was just for him.
Only back then, he had no power to act on such fantasies.
Now…
…
…
...And one night, his resistance finally breaks.
You know what? Maybe he does deserve that. After all the effort he’s put in, after all the things he’s endured, maybe he does deserve to have something all for himself, something he truly wants, something he can secure and know with certainty won’t ever leave his side — you can’t if you don’t have the option.
Maybe you’ll hate him for it. Maybe he’d deserve it if so. But if you do, well, he’ll cross that bridge when he gets to it.
His fingers move without having to really think much about it. Generic, typical lines, just like when he spoke with you. Apologizing for the delay, but surely you understand he’s busy and all, so on and so on. He only pays attention to the very last line, as his fingers slow down in their typing with nerves and anticipation.
>Would you still be up for getting together sometime?
#can you tell i enjoyed this lol#but yeahhh i feel like goro is incapable of NOT harboring some degree of negative emotions for a beloved because thats just. who he is#he loves you but he cannot express that to save his life and has so much negativity pent up#so he just makes you an outlet for every emotion he feels which is. not good#.persona
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✨growth✨
#we stan a man who can express his emotions#and admit when he needs help#also season 2 is so much darker than season 1#literally 😂#ofmd black pete#ofmd#ofmd s2 spoilers#our flag means death#our flag means death s2 spoilers#our flag means death s2#lupete
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has anyone connected this, does anyone hear me
willpower of steel, fluidity of emotions, knowledge from the past, something like that
#pokemas#lance pokemon#cynthia pokemon#steven pokemon#im not in the state to go off the rails but you see it. you understand#i honestly dont have much for steven but the other two like#cynthia's an archeologist she finds answers from the literal ghosts of the past#lance to me is someone who has to keep his emotions steeled for his image and to be a role model#so when there IS something he feels very strongly he cant express it for whatever reason. associate with gyarados' natural rage if you will#now had a thought for steven since i think you would need some sort of willpower to hold onto your values when you inherit a whole company
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A compilation of art for my Dadbastian fanfic Coattails that I commissioned from the incredibly talented @tomoyoo! They went above and beyond with the details... Each picture feels as cozy and warm as a storybook, right? I'm so delighted with how they turned out!! Thank you for making each one so beautiful! 🥹🥹🥹
#coattails#not sebaciel so please don't tag as such! thank you!#kuroshitsuji#the backgrounds are just gorgeous.. thank you for your research and dedication to them#the outfits in the first one are amazing! I love Ciel's shirt and Soma's whole ensemble is so cozy yet regal#look at Ciel in the cardigan in the third one though? he is cozy#the expressions are my favorite. they're so animated! just as I imagine them to be..#I really like Ciel's in the first pic because I imagined him looking annoyed but you actually made him seem curious#and I actually like that more I think it's cute... he really does want to be friends with Soma huh 🥺#Sebastian's expression in the third picture is great. >:o#he's about to throw hands with an old lady#Edward and Ciel's competitive faces! being silly... I love Them#Ciel needs to get swept up in silly competitions more often I think...#and then the last one!! bonding over tea! it's so amazingly tender 😭#I don't think I imagined it coming out so calming and gentle... it's so emotional#it makes me want to keep writing!#if you are a Coattails reader I hope you love these as much as I do!#and if you aren't a Coattails reader... maybe these will convince you to become one? 😏 because they are so full of personality!#thanks times a million tomoyoo!!#(I should wait till tomorrow to post but I want to do it now...)#Coattails fanart#(adding to the fanart tag even though I commissioned it just for convenience's sake)
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Relationship envy except I envy the bond between iconic fictional characters Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson
#their relationship is so beautifully made#your honor they're everything to me#it doesnt even matter if you view them platonically or romantically#you cant deny the love they have for each other#the way that watson writes about holmes is just full of love and admiration#even though holmes doesnt express his feelings in the same way#he still loves him more than anything#as seen in 3GAR and DEVI#they both love each other so much#they both strengthen each other you see#they protect each other#they're a team#they each bring something unique to the table#but it doesnt feel like one is inferior to the other#at least not to me#traditional relationships always make me feel like someone is inferior/weaker than the other#holmes is smarter intellectually and he's stronger physically#but watson has the emotional intelligence#they balance each other perfectly#theyre PARTNERS in every sense of the word#and i want a relationship like theirs#i feel like traditional gender roles and stuff limit me from having a real relationship like this#as a girl#im expected to be weaker and softer#i mean even sherlock holmes says women are weaker#for gods sake#i feel like i will never achieve this level of equal partnership with a man#sherlock holmes#john watson#holmes/watson
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