#he's evil here and husk is having a bad time and THAT'S THE POINT

[sunderberry]

More of my "Valentino owns Husk's soul" AU. Husk is not having a good time.

[societalenemynumberone]

Deadpool quotes but with my Lucifer's older sibling!reader idea-

Reader: [First day in Hell, in the middle of a fistfight] Have you seen this woman?

[holds up a bad crayon drawing of Charlie]

Sera: You've been warned, Reader. This is a shameful and reckless use of your powers. You will be coming with us

Reader: Look, Sera, I don't have time for the goody two-shoes bullshit right now

Alastor: Do you have off an switch?

Reader: Yeah, it's right next to the prostate. Or is that the on switch?

Reader; [after finding out about Charlie's existence] You're clowning. You're not clowning? I sense clowns

Charlie: Feeling a bit lonely?

Reader: Only sometimes when I'm by myself. Or other times when I'm with other people.

Reader: [First ever conversation with an awe-eyed Charlie] You're probably thinking, "My dad said that his older sibling is the second most just being in all of creation, but his sibling just turned that guy into a fucking kabab!" Well, I may be just, but I'm no hero. And yeah, technically, that was a murder. But some of the best love stories start with a murder. And that's exactly what this is, a family love story.

Reader: [to Sera] Listen, the day I decide to become a crime-fighting shit swizzler, who rooms with a bunch of other little whiners in the Lord's Kingdom with some creepy, [points to Adam] Heaven's Gate-looking motherfucker... on that day, [points to Emily] I'll send her shiny, happy ass a friend request

Reader [Helping in the second extermination]: Daddy needs to express some rage.

[starts firing their guns]

Reader: Listen, Angel, if I never see you again, I want you to know that I love you very much. I also buried 1,600 kilos of cocaine somewhere in the hotel - right next to the answer for getting out of a soul contract. Good luck.

Angel Dust: [Grinning] You fucking asshole

Alastor: Morningstar!

Reader: How can I help you? Besides luring women into dark, creepy basements.

Reader: [Just learned how to use a phone, looking at a text from Angel] What is that?

Husk: That's the shit emoji. You know the turd with the smiling face and the eyes. I thought it was chocolate yogurt for so long

Sera: I've given Reader every chance to join us but they'd rather act like a child. A heavily armed child. When will they grow up and see benefits of joining the Angelic Council?

Emily: Which benefits? Commiting genocide for amusement? Or the Angel that falls every few decades?

Sera: Please, falling out of Heaven builds character

Reader: Superhero landing. She's gonna do a superhero landing. Wait for it...

[Lute jumps from the platform and lands]

Reader: [clapping their hands] Whoo! Superhero landing! You know, that's really hard on your knees

Charlie: [Stopping Reader from killing Valentino] I can't allow this, Reader. Please, come quietly.

Reader: You blonde cock-gobbler!

Charlie: That's not nice.

Reader: You're really gonna fuck this up for me? Trust me, that squeaking bag of dick-tips has it coming. He's pure evil. Besides... Nobody's getting hurt.

[a dead body falls off an overhead building]

Reader: That guy was already up there when I got here.

[ms-cartoon]

I've been coming across a bunch of Hazbin spoilers and decided "screw it" and found the leaks to the full episodes. (I don't care how sensitive you leak haters are about it)

Of course, as expected, this show is already turning out to be trashy as I would expect it to be. Little retcons here and there, shitty writing, some crappy and pathetic characters who already lost whatever mojo they had back in the pilot, voice-acting is bitter as it will always be, etc.

There are a lot of issues with just these two eps, but I'm just gonna point out the ones that got my attention the most.

WARNING: THERE ARE SPOILERS/ MENTIONS OF HARRASMENT AND ALL THE 18+ BS.

-- Charlie- "Once upon a time, there was a glowing city protected by golden gates, known as Heaven. It was ruled by beings of pure light. Angels that worshipped good and shielded all from evil."

I beg to differ since it's established already that angels from heaven are nothing but fakes and are evil as hell, probably proud of it. Exhibit A: Adam and Sera. Now if they were anything like Frollo (someone who believes they are doing good but are not) I might be okay with it. Like say, they only resort to extermination because they're from heaven, they feel it is their job, and they have to do it even though it's wrong. Instead, however, I assume they exterminate because they just like to do it and they're evil like that. They probably have a feeling that some sinners are still good people on the inside and just don't care.

-- Charlie: As the numbers of Hell grew, so did its power. Threatened by this,

Heaven made a truly heartless decision that every year, they would send down an army an extermination to ensure Hell and its sinners could never rise against them.

I hear with my little ear another retcon!!

In the pilot, the only reason why extermination was a thing was because of overpopulation in hell. Now they're saying heaven is exterminating sinners cuz they're threatened by the overgrowing power and they don't want to be rebelled by it?? I going to guess that they only made this change so they can force evil on heaven while making Lucifer the innocent one. This is exactly what they did with Stella in the HB series where it was brought up that things were okay between her and Stolas only for the second season to say Stella hated Stolas the whole time they were together and treated him badly just so the writers can tell us viewers that she's evil.

Is this gonna be a thing now?

-- Angel: I'll have the horniest sinners knockin these walls down to get in!

This body was made to be exploited!

Seriously, guys, this is the same pervert we're supposed to feel bad for BECAUSE he's being exploited!

And leave it to Angel to completely miss the point of this hotel. What they want is to convince sinners to REDEEM themselves. Banging them is not a way to go about it, bud!

-- My predictions about Angel being a sex joke are correct. I'm mean- they've always been correct, I'm just saying I had a feeling they were going to show it off more in the show.

-- Vaggie: "No, we can't force sinners to stay here. They need to choose to."

Angel Dust: "Well, I chose to stay here and I think it's all stupid."

No shit- The only reason why u agreed to stay is for the free rent. So don't go marking yourself as a good example.

-- I don't totally have a problem with this show being a musical as long as the timing is right. Charlie is so quick to tell Vaggie about a meeting she'll participate in and is excited about, but before Vaggie can even question it and talk to her, Charlie immediately starts singing without even hearing Vaggie out. They kinda rushed this musical number a little too quickly. Which only goes to show how fast-paced this episode is. It's always fast-pacing with these shows.

-- I have the sudden urge to jump inside this show and beat the ever-loving crap outta Angel if keeps on moaning and getting horny . . .

-- Angel continuously flirts and touches an obviously uncomfortable Husk and fans are going to look at this as "cute" while I look in annoyance and disgust. And once again, this is the same guy we're supposed to feel bad for because he has a pimp who inflicts the same actions that he does and fans will choose to ignore it.

-- Adam is practically the most irritating character in this series so far. I was right with what I said about him before. For someone who's supposed to be an angel he sure as hell doesn't act like it. The whole time he's on screen, he's just making jokes, ridiculing the hell out of Charlie, and not listening to her at all. Continuously cussing and talking about dicks??? He has the most cringiest dialogue ever and I had the urge to skip it every time he's on screen. Something tells me he and Lute should switch positions since she seems more professional.

-- Charlie: Sinners make mistakes, but everyone makes mistakes.

Charlie, I know where you're trying to get at sweetheart, but I really hope you don't include all the rapists, murderers, abusers, and pedophiles down below. Do you really think they qualify as someone who can be redeemed? If so, I would have to side with the angels here despite their antagonistic behavior. I would understand trying to rehab drug addicts, alcoholics, robbers, etc. but definitely not the former.

Now that I think about it, Charlie is kind of acting like Viv in this scenario where she tries to excuse these criminalistic behaviors most of her characters committed when they really don't deserve anything good happening to them. That's like trying to redeem Valentino for pimping and abusing Angel Dust. Do we really think Val is capable of redemption??

Sorry to burst your bubble Ms. Morningstar, but the angels are in the right here. Hell exists for a reason and people who do bad things and like to do bad things deserve to be there. I wouldn't bother trying to rehab sinners who don't deserve it or are not going to try to fix their behavior.

-- Lute: Angels don't make mistakes . . .

Then what does that say about Lucifer? He was an angel who caused some actions that you guys would count as mistakes therefore expelling him from heaven. You guys never even attempted to exterminate him yet.

-- I'm sorry, I don't like Brandon Rogers as Killjoy. It's literally just a demon version of one of his characters. It's nothing original like the pilot.

So that is what I think about the first episode. If I forget to mention something, i'll just edit the post. Won't be too long before I make some comments about the second one, but for now, the gist of everything is . . . it's bleh.

If you have any questions, feel free to ask me!!

[mishy-mashy]

Probably not gonna match with when this comes out translated, but still—just a few things I liked about BNHA 423

WE GOT TO SEE THE VESTIGES AGAAAAINNNNN!!! HI BRUCE!

I think Bruce gets a lot of bad angles. This is an example (but it's okay honey, you're still hot stuff)

Unfortunately, I have a favorite. It's Bruce. The most Normal Guy™ in the vestige line up. And the special-est sopping wet cat for Kudo ever (Yoichi is a dry cat because at least Kudo remembered to take Yoichi inside).

The vestiges were all gearing for a punch, but Tomura/Tenko is reaching out.

The rest of the users usually use OFA to punch, is the general idea we see. But Tomura/Tenko's Quirk isn't that.

Tomura/Tenko reaching his hand out to grab, and the vestiges readying a punch—it's their ways of putting the hurt on.

And Tomura/Tenko knows what happens if he puts his fingers on someone. He was aiming for AFO's head too. Guy was pissed.

I like that the vestiges look like they're crawling out of hell (or the depths) here. Technically for OFA itself, which they embody, being in AFO's realm was hell. It meant they failed their collective goals to win against AFO, and keep OFA [Yoichi] out of his possession

Also, they're all embers of who they once were. If Factors embodied their personalities, these embers are the leftovers of that embodiment. Their eyes are blank.

And even when they're only shattered fragments of themselves, they came for AFO to take him down.

They really embodied that purpose. Even as husks of themselves, or sad leftovers that scattered from their destroyed Factors, they still reached forward to clock AFO one last time.

They were that determined, and that determination was all that was left of them.

Meanwhile, with Yoichi, his itty bitty remains continued trying to talk sense into his brother till the end.

Yoichi has such a bleeding heart. But he also loved his brother.

AFO is standing in the dark. But in that dark, there's a light. It's Yoichi, as if he were the light at the end of the tunnel.

AFO chased OFA for decades, and ruined a lot of lives, just to have Yoichi by his side again.

Joining hands with Garaki; killing Banjo, En, Nana; forcing the creation and upbringing of Tenko; the whole Shimura incident; everything he did to UA and the Aoyamas to get close to the wielder of OFA [Yoichi]. He did all that, and more.

He just wanted the chance to have Yoichi with him again. That was his purpose in obtaining OFA this whole time.

Yoichi was AFO's light at the end of the tunnel.

Too bad for AFO, the light at the end of the tunnel was an oncoming train.

Yoichi is telling AFO what happened, but I love that in front of Yoichi, AFO became himself. I mean, not a mass of scar tissue, but who he originally looked like

Idk, there's just something symbolic about it?

Midoriya calls AFO a lonely man. And Yoichi comes to him, and AFO says he wants Yoichi by his side. He wouldn't be lonely if that were the case. Yoichi could make him not lonely anymore.

And the lonely man, a bundle of scar tissue from his warpath to see Yoichi again, reverts to a time he had no injuries or scars. He looks like the period of time where he and Yoichi lived in the same era.

In front of Yoichi, he's just.. himself, I guess is how to put it. Not a mass of scar tissue, or the evil villain everyone feared: he's literally just Yoichi's "Nii-san".

It's like, the scar tissue shed itself to reveal AFO's true face.

He wants to see Yoichi's face, and ended up showing his own without even meaning or thinking to.

He's finally looking straight at Yoichi, trying to see his face. It's not like when Yoichi was alive, when AFO always looked down on him, and just waited for him to bend to his will.

Now, AFO has little time left with Yoichi, and he's lost his composure for it, wanting to see Yoichi as more than an ember. But maybe he got to the point he only ever saw Yoichi for his Factor, rather than the Factor for Yoichi: how often has he said he was chasing One For All, instead of his younger brother?

AFO wanted to see Yoichi's face, but when he saw Yoichi next to Kudo... yeah, he lost his mind a bit there. Probably (Definitely?) because he saw Kudo's Ability, and Kudo with Yoichi. And Kudo is "to blame for everything".

Maybe he lost it seeing Kudo and Yoichi together, because it was a repeat of the past, I suppose?

(Technically, he did see Yoichi's face one last time already. Just that he also saw the bastard Kudo's face again too. And AFO did not like that.)

[gabrielsbubblegumbitch]

I just wanted to say that I am really envious of the way you write the Vees. As someone who struggles with making characters woobiefying and with characterization in general, I appreciate how you can write these characters perfectly that the show didn’t have time to portray. I didn’t have a specific request, but now I was wondering if you could give me some advice on how to analyze and write a character, even if you have a personal bias towards them?

Awww thank you so much ❤️ I don't have like any degree in literature or anything that would give me credibility in giving writing advice, usually I just go with the flow. But I'll do my best!

Imo the most fundamental thing is the way you think about characters. In fandom spaces, we very often see them as "people we like" - hence all the discourses like in Valentino's case "if you like him it means you are a bad person". I think that woobification is influenced by this cognitive dissonance caused by liking characters that should be unlikeable. For me the way out of it was giving up "characters as people" mindset and changing it for "characters as tools". Bacause that's what they are - tools you use to build your narrative. When I say I love Valentino I don't mean I would shake his hand - I mean he's my favourite toy I can do multiple things with. And it's his flaws that make him so much fun. Because outside of the comedy genre, narrative cannot exist without conflict. The more flaws a character has, the more conflict it causes. That's why villains are such a powerful driving force for stories (here are some great essays about it: 1, 2). Put any character in the room with Val and you have an interesting bit not only because of the usual character differences that could happen between eg. Vaggie and Husk but also because stakes suddenly become high. What will he do? Will he hurt them? We saw what he's capable of. Will he be nice? Man, that's even worse because it means he has his own motive to be nice. What might it be? That's what keeps the audience engaged with your writing. Extra points if you give him some human weaknesses or conflicting desires. When it comes to characterization, nuance is the key. That's why I love VoxVal so much - two characters that are absolutely awful but they are fiercely in love. How could Valentino be capable of simply caring about someone but himself? What kind of human is buried underneath all this evil? So much to unpack here. Nothing I'd like to experience but everything I'd like to see from a safe distance. Consider: would you even like the Vees so much in the beginning if they were just other guests at the hotel? In the show, neither of them has a single redeemable quality. And yet, here we are.

When it comes to writing characteristics it's also important to watch characters from different perspectives - that helps with giving them nuance. Let's take Vox. People seem to like and respect him, he's obviously an influential figure (he has a lot of social power). But from Alastor's perspective, he's just a pathetic little attention-seeking looser (he has a fragile ego and lowe self-esteem). Yet his assistant seemed to be scared shitless while talking to him (he had done things that made people from his closer look aware that he's dangerous). Angel knows he watches his abuse and hangs out with Valentino (at best he's indifferent to other's suffering, at worst he enjoys it). Carmilla doesn't respect him but they are on terms good enough, Vox wants to do business with her (he's a competent business partner). For the rest of Vees he's smart enough to listen to him but at the same time he's their cringefail naurospicy bestie. Add all of those perspectives together and you have yourself a multidimensional character that can interact with other elements of the narrative in vastly different ways. Also, from that point you can build up, asking yourself other questions "What would they think/do/say?".

Also, the last thing: every character needs a clear goal that influences all their decision. Choose it and always keep it in mind. Bonus points: a character has two main goals that are contradictory. When I write Vox he has two goal: power and adoration. He always has to choose which one is more important to him because while he has measures to achieve great power, some things that he would want to do are socially undesirable. In Valentino's case: hedonistic pleasure and immediate gratification vs love for Vox that demands sacrifices and compromises.

So anyway I hope that will be helpful to you <3 And don't be too hard on yourself when it comes to writing, not everything must be Game of Thrones. Especially in fandom spaces, sometimes we all want to indulge in some simple fluff or crack.

[themageofblood]

In case I'm right... I want to be the one to call it 1st...

Nifty is roo/eve and here is my evidence.

Like I mentioned in a previous post. Nifty is presented as a joke insane character, however there are several instances in hazbin hotel that suggest Nifty is eve.

1. Husk says we don't want to even know what's going on in her mind. It may seem like a joke but I feel like that is a major foreshadowing event to prepare us for when nifty's story is told

2. In the rebuilding of the hotel everyone in the main cast has something that associates their character on the building. At the top we see the key with a giant eye that looks very similar to nifty's . And as the root of all evil wouldn't it make sense for her to be represented by a key (like the key to pandoras box if you catch my drift) not to mention the wings around the eye which supports my other theory below (#8)

3. She is a sadomasochist. She mentions that she likes being forced and likes punishing bad boys and if she were eve, Adam's 2nd wife she may have been created for Adam with traits that would likely appeal to him.(a personal maid, who doesn't mind being controlled, and is obsessed with a "bad boy" image much like adam) Her naivety and childish nature is opposite to that of Lilith's which may be because Adam wanted the exact opposite of everything Lilith was. Now I know what you're thinking "but what about her sadism traits?she expressed she likes to punish bad boys" and to that I say that may be a trauma response to having Adam as a husband who demanded control over women. Maybe getting Adam to eat the fruit of knowledge was her way of trying to get Adam punished because we know eve tempted Adam with the fruit that doomed mankind

4. Her reaction to killing Adam was,,, off. When she was stabbing already dead angels, she had a smile on her face the entire time. But when she killed Adam it's like she dissociated for a second before going into a much more manic craze then when she stabbed the other angels. Much like when she was staring into the camera and her face was just. :/ The fact that she was the one to kill Adam felt intentional. And if Adam was her abuser dissociating after killing him would make sense

5. Building off my last point nifty only does the dissociated face twice only prior to the wars events, and that was she was being videotaped. We know that Alastor owns her soul and some speculate that they may have eachother's souls and if that's the case alastors influence could be the reason for her reaction. Is she really insane, is he forcing her insanity, or is her sanity something she willing gave up with her soul in order for her to forget her pain? Is alastors aversion for video solely about him? Or is it about hiding something bigger? And if it is is nifty apart of that?

6. I know Viv said she died in the 50s but things can change since the pilot, like nifty's clothes. Either it's a roos (pun intended) or she genuinely can't remember and someone guessed for her that she was from the 50s based on her trad wife escape personality and her affliction to bad boys. A popular 50s trope And she went along with it.

7.Speaking of her clothes I know some people mentioned she may have been shot, but I think she was stabbed several times. Nifty is a very small woman. It would only take one shot to kill her and 3 seems excessive. Her 3 blood stains may be stab wounds. It would also explain why she's obsessed with stabbing. All the other sinners at the hotel seem to have addictions to the same things that have caused/lead to their deaths.

8 .im so surprised no one's mentioned this, but she's the only other character with red circles on the cheek, and who else has this? That's right Charlie, and the fallen angel lucifer. We know that all hazbin character designs relate to the characters stories and I don't think it was unintentional this detail was added to her character. We also don't see this on any of the other heaven born angels. Either she herself is a fallen angel and only fallen angels get red circles on their cheeks or she is somehow related to lucifer's story or heaven or something. Also, this may be a stretch but the poodle on a leash on her skirt may also be a hint that either she or someone else is on a leash....

9. She's the only straight character. Hear me out. Either Adam was so insecure about Lilith leaving him that eve was made to only like men to lessen her chances of leaving him (because Viv said she's the only straight character meaning Lilith is queer) or Viv chose her to be straight and a villian as a fuck you to the conservatives who have an issue with the queer themes in the show.

Anyway Maybe I'm biased because she's my favorite character, but that's my theory. A fan theory 😏

[cutepastelstarsalior]

Decided to watch Hazbin Hotel…..(only because I hard that Jeremy Jordan is Lucifer va…..and also because i am a hater™️)

Watching this on Watch Anime dub, it has the pilot…so

Pilot

Pilot Charlie voice is so pretty. God the angels designs remind me of those weird The Purge neon mask…forget how red this pilot is..there is a lot of random sounds effects, it feels a tinnnyyyyyy bit to much. Pilot angels voice <3 snake guy voice so SO familiar????? I feel like he was in a video game or something. Hmm I forgot how much cursing there is…minor pet peeve, sometimes the lineart is hot pink and it’s kind of annoying since it sticks out against black lineart, also there SO many eyes, everywhere? Idk if that a fun little quirk or lore™️ that one news reporter being on fire made me laugh.. I like the mixed art style when Vaggie talks about Alastor, it’s charming. Hmmm, radio sound effects, love them <3

I think it’s cool that Charlie is a very sweet, kind of “childish” Nieves princess in a world full of murder and hate and violence. It makes me wonder how she got that way? Also hell is overpopulated so the angels kill them. Interesting!! Especially since lot of demons also fight over territory. This Katie killjoy does have a point, why would sinners want to change? Beside the killing, it seems like hell is basically Earth 2.0.. It is cool how Alastor the radio demon, decided to help out because he’s bored.

GOOSEWORX THE CEATOR OF THE AMAZING DIGITAL CIRCUS :0 👀 yooooooo. Jesus there so many people working on this pilot…

Scale of 1-5 I give this a 3.5.

Episode 1

Ok, so the intro says that the angels have an extermination because they don’t want Hell to rise up. But in the pilot it was because of overpopulation…Also Lucifer not liking hell and can no longer dream, while Lilith thrives…hmmm if this story has Lilith be evil while Lucifer is good idk how to feel about that. The voices are different, while I don’t like Charlie’s new voice (sounds to idk deep?) I definitely like Vaggies, it’s deep and a bit monotone. Also new outfits!!! Charlie’s is fine, but I don’t like how sharp her face is? So look more older and mature compared to her pilot self, which add the whole naive princess feel. It’s canonically 5days to a week between the events of the pilot and the first episode…oh ew I hate Angels voice. It’s too high, and he has an accent now??? Oh Husk voice!! While is deep, it’s also high? No longer gruff.. hmm character wise, angels seem more bitchy?? Then the pilot?

Ok…random song???? Just…no build up music or anything.. Charlie curses more too. In the pilot she curse like, 3 times. Here she does it more.

There is a giant clock tower thing that went you go in, leases to a lobby then leads to the angels???? Wouldn’t that make it like, easier to attack heaven or something? Why is an Angel, like the heaven angel, cursing?? I feel like that would be against the rules?? WAIT THATS ADAM LIKE FIRST HUMAN ADAM???? Oh no that worse… like like nifty she’s a cutiepie :)

Ok Hell is still overpopulated, and heaven keeps killing then because they think he’ll will overpower them, but Adam does it for entertainment? Hmmm they also going to kill again in 6 months. :/ Katie killjoy voice is also bad.. oh!!! Wait Adam lied, the real reason heaven is killing again because an Angel was killed? But an angel was never killed before??? I thought hell was very powerful?

Episode rating 1-5. I give it a 3. I like the singing, love Vaggies and Alastor’s dynamic. But the plot is a bit confusing? Is hell being kill because of overpowered or because of overpopulated? The hotel design is pretty. Though he’ll is still red :/

Episode 2

Why is hell citizen freaking out? In the pilot it seems like they like it, because people can fight over territory. And an angel was murder, so ??? Don’t see why they would panic.

The Vees. Vox, a tv head demon who is like a weird Amazon business guy. His design is…clutter. Dude, striped jacket with vertical stripes shirt? Tho thank god he’s blue, he sticks out nicely in hell. I like his blue neon eyeliner, that cool. Velvet is a British fashion designer….shes fine. I don’t really care for her. And Valentino, who’s is Angel’s boss/pimp. And oh my gosh whose voice, his accent keeps coming and going??? It’s bad I hate it, because it’s so noticeable. Interesting that he’s Spainish(?)

Vox can hypnotize people and he did a cool tv voice effect!! Oh god I think I have a favorite character??? Vox and nifty…

Ok ok ok, so there a radio demon, a tv demon, is there a computer/internet demon??? God I hope so. Imagine if there an internet demon and vox and alastor has to like put aside there differences and work together.

Why is there Egyptian demons???? Ancient Egyptian believed in an underworld called Duat, but it’s not a place of external punishment. The ancient Egyptian thought the worst punishment a soul could have would be denial to the afterlife, and being ceased to exist. The souls did have to make a dangerous journey to be judged by Horus and Osiris. (Wiki)

Vox asked Alastor to join his team?? Maybe Vox doesn’t like Velvet and Valitini that much? He seems more like a boss to them than a friend.

“And that’s the tea” :/ Why is Alastair using slang from after the 20’s? I mean sure he probably learn it in hell. But Alastor is like from 1920. That’s the tea/spilling tea is original from drag culture in 1994.

What IS Charlie’s plan to redeems sinners? Charlie was born in hell, and the sinner were from earth, surely the sinner like, know how to apologize and basic human decency? Maybe they just forgot? Maybe they need to like, clean themselves of their sin??? Idk.

Oh my god Charlie is having them do a say no to drugs roleplay!!!! ……that. Akers me wonder, how does Charlie’s know this stuff if she’s from hell? Does she learn this by watching the sinners? Did her mom or dad teach her this??? Ok, so I have seen the pilot and that seen post about that one comic about angel day to day life, and seen the addic music video. So it’s a surprise that Fat Nuggets, Angle’s pet pig is here. And that weird red smoke.

I don’t care for snake guy. He’s…neutral. Kind of suck that who snake guy being a spy was like, immediately uncovered. Kind of wished that angle was get like bummed out about the attention snake guy is getting, then later he would like, try to find out what is going on. Or something!!! But I guess having snake guy be an actual member of the team is fine. Tho, I do like his design. It’s nice to see characters that aren’t so red. Angel’s and Vaggie’s singing voice harmonies really well. Ok, this is like the first sign I actually enjoy.

Scale 1-5. I give it a 4. Only because of Vox, and that ending song.

Episode 3

Snake guy wanting to shoot the other residents because he thinks everyone is to nice and it’s a lie. That…that surprisingly a deep thought? Like I didn’t expect the show to have the residents not trust one another because they are waiting for the other shoe to drop. Also it seems like Vaggie and Alastair run the hotel, like doing up with the ad, making rules. Seems like Charlie is just the face/money aspect of the hotel. My guess is that in the future Charlie wants to quit, or is forced to to quit, and Vaggie take over, or gives like, an emotional speech about how the hotel and running it charge her for the better.

I remover in the pilot, or around that time, Alastor is aroace (nice) but I don’t remember what Vaggie is. But I can see people shipping them. For me, I could see then being close friends or maybe a weird ambiguous relationship.

Charlie you kind of a shitty boss. Like, I know I just said that vaggie does all the work, but girl, you have to do some work to?

Oh my god there do a Mean Girls trust fall bit.

Weird green spider guy….i love him. Wish this show has subtitles, would love to understand what this guy is saying..

There sub overloads? Neat. God that weird neon wolf??? Dinosaur??? Is SO distracting, like they really stick out against the reds and washout colors..

Once again, a another song without any music buildup or warning. “I’m the backbone of the Vees” hmmmmm are you tho? Like, Vox is doing a lot, and Val is….there. WAIT IS SHE the internet overboard??? She’s call “social media overlord” in one of the screen backgrounds.. god if she if, that lame. She not like, scary or imitating?? She’s just annoying. Man that sucksss. We could have like a cool internet overlord that was young and careless, but that a persona, and on the inside they are rude and vile. Because the internet has everything and anything, so they could instantly control people lives or spread rumors or doxxs people????

Idk why, but velvet sing reminds me of SIX the musical. But I know that her VA is Lily Cooper who did the SpongeBob musical and wicked , and not SIX.

Why is this lady’s earring hanging off her hair??? Do sinner/demons/whatever not have ears or noses?? Eghh I don’t like her singing?? It feel like she’s straining herself.

WAIT THE SNAKE EGG HAS EGGS BECAUSE SNAKE LAY EGGS BUT THEY ALSO EAT THEM. OHHHHH. why did that take me so long to figure that out??

Scale 1-4. I give this a 2. Idk man, this episode is kind of boring.

Episode 4

Oh dear, I hard LOT of bad things with this episode…let’s see how bad it is.

Charlie get gross out by the sex tape….asexual Charlie real. To me!!!! Also same, Charlie, same.

“Dollface” aw, cute.

Angel panicking about Charlie trying to talk to his boss. I’m guessing he’s afraid that if Charlie accidentally angers Val, Val will take his anger out on Angel. :(

Oh cool. Val hit angel. Wow!! (Sarcasm) Totally wish there was like, a warning or something for that!!!!

Hmm ok. So that song was…bad. Like lyrically bad. As for the scenes, I literally don’t know how to feel about them? Like knowing the backstories of this episode, it grosses me out. But the song and scenes, just didn’t feel anything? Idk.

I don’t think husk should get angel back?? Angel was sexually harassed him, and husk has repeatedly said no. Like yeah, angel did that has a bad coping mechanisms or like, persona, but hmmm. I feel like if they two need to talk to each other, it could be in a different way? Also I noticed this episode is SUPER short compared to the other ones. The other once’s are like 22 minutes, this one is 12.

Oh cool, husk stoped angel from getting roofied. I guess with him being a bartender, he’s train to watch out of these things.

Husk singing voice is so so nice <3 but WOW is this message a bad one. Angel sold his soul to Val, and Val abuses him. Angel then self destruct because he thinks if he (angel) is broken enough then Val will let him go. Meanwhile…..Husk was an overlord who gamble and lost his soul to Alastor…..these 2 problems don’t equal each other. One is horrible, and one is a bummer situation. Also the message for being at rock bottom, together, maybe he helped to some people, but I think in Angel’s case he needs different help. Like sometimes when people act worse with each other, it can make people not want to get better or encourage someone to get worse. I feel like that what husk and angel dynamic is?

For some reason I feel like Charlie was written really out of character here??? She crying and had to be carried away. It feels very weird.

Scale 1-4. I give this a 1. Would have have this a 0 but husk singing voice save it.

I heard that episode 5 and 6 are coming soon. Will I seen them, probably. Do I enjoy this show? Not really. The concept is cool! And like, only 3 characters I enjoy. But I feel like the way this is handled is bad. On Prime Video this show is 18+. Honestly, this show feels more like TV-14 - TV-MA. TV 14 is decried as intended for children ages 14 and up in company of an adult. It possibly contains suggesting dialogue, strong language, intense sexual situations, or intense violence.

TV MA is for adults. It possibly contains crude indecent language, explicit sexual activity, or graphic violence. On IMDb Hazbin Hotel has 19 sex and nudity, 14 gore and violence, 9 profanity, 10 alcohol, drugs and smoking, 9 fighting and intense scenes. On HBO MAX it’s 18+, TVMA, when video version, and 16+ on YouTube. So like, who is this show for???

[jinxed-sinner]

Maybe I'm being delusional and giving Alastor too much benefit of the doubt but I don't understand why so many people seems convinced that Alastor is the most evil character in the HH universe. Sure if we take into consideration only the hotel he is, but outside of that he doesn't seem that bad. Even at his lowest moments (his past as serial killer, his killing of the overlords, his manipulation of Charlie, that scene with Husk in the hallway in ep 5) there still is some sort of nuance to his action. I do feel like, as of right now, he has been the most self-centered character in the show but that doesn't make him the most evil. I would argue that the Vees, Adam and Lute are worse, because at least Alastor was said to have somewhat of a moral code when. Not saying that this makes Alastor a good person or that he is incapable of being cruel or that in the future he won't have his evil moments, but for now calling him the most evil character in the show feels excessive.

This has been my view of Alastor since I first watched the show honestly, and every time I analyze him (because I do that more than can possibly be healthy) it just strengthens that. Sure, he's an asshole, but he doesn't physically attack people unless he's given a reason to. He seems to prefer getting into verbal spats over getting physical, and even the scene where Husk confronts(?) him is mostly Alastor just verbally taking his frustration and anger out on Husk (which still isn't okay but it's not as bad as a lot of people make it out to be). Like every time he's shown to get physically aggressive in the show, there's a reason behind it, and that reason is fascinating considering he claims to not care about the hotel's success; every time he gets physical with anyone, he's protecting the hotel.

When he attacks Sir Pentious and takes down his blimp in the pilot? He's protecting the hotel. When he uses a similar strategy to fight Pentious in Radio Killed the Video Star that he used in the pilot? He's protecting the hotel, because Pentious blew a hole in the wall of it. When he fights the loan sharks in Dad Beat Dad? He's protecting Mimzy and the hotel, and then he tells Mimzy she's no longer welcome at the hotel because she "deliberately brought danger on this place". When he fights Adam in The Show Must Go On? He's protecting the hotel.

He doesn't attack unless he's provoked, even verbally. He might make some mean comments here and there (such as pointing out Charlie and Vaggie's failures) but in general, he's just an asshole, he's not actively evil.

Going back to the fact that he kicked Mimzy out of the hotel, up to that point he's been parading around this attitude of "I don't care about the hotel's success, all I care about is the entertainment value it can bring me!" even specifying that he doesn't care if the hotel succeeds or not. The idea that the hotel would inevitably fail is why he showed up to the hotel in the first place. Alastor's willingness to kick out Mimzy tells us two things:

He's willing to listen to advice from other people (as it is Husk who advised him that Mimzy was trouble; this also actually implies that he values Husk's input, as much as he acts like he doesn't), and

He cares about the hotel a heck of a lot more than he lets on

He's just currently in a position where, whether it's pride or something else, he can't admit to anyone, let alone himself, that he's started caring, and that is part of what spurs on his mental breakdown in Finale:

This place reeks of death, there's a chill in the air And I barely escaped being killed by a hair "Great Alastor, altruist, died for his friends" Sorry to disappoint, that is not how this ends

Not to mention, he looks terrified when he sings "Great Alastor, altruist, died for his friends" and angry the rest of his part of Finale. I don't think he's angry about the fact that he almost died defending both the hotel and the hotel's staff and residents; I think he's terrified about both how perception of him would change if it got out, and what it says about him. Those first four lines of his part of Finale imply, to me at least, that he is how he is as a defense strategy, potentially from trauma (and I do personally think it was born from some kind of trauma, very likely from when he was alive and very likely from his childhood). When that defense mechanism cracks, he panics.

His self-centered behavior is likely a defense mechanism he learned in life, because if fanon is canon and his dad was abusive? He likely learned in that environment that if he wasn't self-centered, he won't survive or he'll be easy to take advantage of, and this benefits him in Hell because he doesn't just make deals based on his own self interest for no reason; in Hell that's a requirement for survival. One misworded deal or contract and his life could be turned upside down. It makes complete sense to me that he does deals on a basis of "How can this benefit me?" because when you're making a binding contract involving your soul, you need to be careful with your wording. Even if it's not a defense mechanism he carried over from life, it's very possible that it's a defense mechanism from whatever deal he found himself in. If that deal was misworded, and that's why he's in the position he's in, I wouldn't blame him for getting self-centered with anything.

There is so much more to Alastor than just him being a sadistic asshole and I hate that people don't acknowledge it. Alastor being a sadistic asshole is one part of a larger puzzle. I'm not saying my interpretation is right, but I am saying that there are so many hints that Alastor isn't as horrible as people act like he is and I think it needs more acknowledgement. He's capable of connection, as seen with Rosie and Niffty. He doesn't just physically attack people because he thinks it's funny (that's what the sadistic jokes and mocking are for). He's far from one-dimensional and too many people ignore it.

Alastor is morally gray, not morally bankrupt.

[dr-brainrot]

Alastor's Time Alive + Deal Theory

You know why it’s important to know who Alastor’s victims were?

Because it’ll explain A LOT.

If Alastor was just another run of the mill serial killer, he probably killed for the thrill coupled with ego, trauma, and untreated psychological issues. His victims either had no connection, or they had a hyper specific trait but they were innocent people. Think Joker.

HOWEVER, let's say Alastor killed not so great people. Rapists, abusers, violent people, etc. I’m imagining a vigilante taking the law into their own hands. Alastor gets a thrill of living the double life while also feeling power over taking out shitty people. This would make sense given what we already see from him in the show. To our knowledge he doesn’t go after lesser sinners unless they cross him, he takes out big overlords, and anyone’s soul he has tied to him doesn't seem physically tethered to him. The souls he has (Husk, Nifty?) appear to live their lives until Alastor calls on them. This is much more humane (for hell) compared to certain overlords we’ve seen (*cough*Valentino*cough*).

So what? Alive Alastor (possibly) kills shitty people, gets a thrill from getting away with it and the power trip, he dies because he was sloppy with one of the bodies, and seems to be continuing his hunt for power and dominance in hell. Why does this change anything?

Because that would make him complex. Instead of just being this serial killer, he’s a serial killer with a vigilante complex and some sort of moral code. 

And him being complex could point to who his deal is with and what his deal could be related to.

When Alastor is freaking out, he mentions “Once I figure out how to unclip my wings.” I don’t think this is alluding to Alastor being an angel (saint? Since he’s human idk if it's an angel), but it might allude to Alastor having a deal with an angel. But who? Haven’t we met all possible angels? Not necessarily.

Where’s Eve?

You’re telling me that the woman who ate the apple, a pretty significant part in bringing evil to earth, Adam’s second wife, is NOWHERE TO BE SEEN??? Yeah, no. 

Adam and Eve are probably estranged, given Adam seems very interested in every other woman except Eve. I’m wondering if Eve would take the role of a 50s trad wife? I think the guilt and shame Lucifer has for being a fallen angel and his hand in bringing evil to the world could be mirrored in Eve, where she tries her best to be the perfect wife, perfect woman, to repent for her mistakes. She’s allowed in Heaven because she begs for forgiveness. 

When the first extermination happens, she probably went down to Hell with Adam, to see what her actions resulted in. She gets to Hell and is shocked with what she sees. She sees sinners, but she also sees how complicated sinners are. They have families, there’s children down here, some sinners are trying to protect their loved ones from the extermination, fearful for their lives. She can’t unsee the human in the sinners.

And then she runs into Alastor, who just so happened to take a stroll to see where all these angels are coming from and wtf is going on??? Eve sees Alastor and she just has this gut feeling about him. A killer sure, but he was as complex as any of the other sinners down here.

So she goes up to him.

She talks with him and thinks that his actions were brutal, but he wasn’t killing anyone who’d be missed. He had a very specific moral code, with twisted execution, and probably grew up in a traumatizing environment. She sees how powerful he is and, while standing in the middle of blood and carnage, she makes a deal with him. She’ll give him some of her angelic powers under the condition that he will be her Hell diplomat, making sure Hell isn’t screwed over completely by Heaven. I feel like Eve would have a soft spot for Hell and its sinners and would feel bad that she got to go to Heaven, even with her sin, while the rest rot in Hell. Alastor 100% agrees because hell yeah more power. Eve’s first order is for Alastor to go down to Earth and make sure there are still sinners coming into Hell, even with the extermination happening. 

So that’s what he does. He’s on Earth making sure souls come to hell for 7 years. Which would make sense of why Alastor knows modern slang in Stayed Gone. Granted he could have heard it in Hell, but he hasn't been in hell for the past 7 years, so how tf would his great depression ass know what a podcast is? I think Heaven would hear the news about Charlie’s hotel (They know about Angel Dust, they’re somewhat aware of the goings on in Hell) but because they thought it was a fruitless plan they didn’t really care, except for Eve. Eve eventually hears about Charlie’s idea and immediately wants to help her, sending Alastor back to hell to keep an eye on her and her hotel. Cue season 1.

This would make sense of why Alastor thought he could take on Adam without angelic weapons. He was already given some angelic powers, surely he’d be strong enough to hold his own! Until he gets his ass handed to him. Cue freak out. 

I think the correlation between Lilith and Alastor both disappearing 7 years ago is just a coincidence, I think Lilith’s deal with Adam is separate from Alastor’s deal with Eve. I have other thoughts on Lilith and Adam’s deal but that’s for another post lol.

And I'm also operating under the impression that the exterminations have been going on for 7 years and not longer, but again that's another post.

I’d love to hear other theories! I’m still on the fence on Eve's motivations, and also her relationship to Lucifer? Like were they actually- uh… bow chika wow wow-ing??? What would that mean for Lucifer and Lilith’s relationship? Is Eve a jealous ex trying to get into the royal hell family??? That would mess up the story we’re told in the beginning, though I doubt the book was written with truth at the forefront (possibly propaganda). Honestly I’m buzzing with theories🤯

[burning-sol]

funniest part i just read from a review is that hazbin hotel "woobified" alastor, like can we not tell the difference between establishing character motivation and making a character overly sympathetic? the reveal that alastor is also bound by a contract being followed up by threatening and undermining husk i think is meant to imply alastor is. bad. i think we're meant to get the impression alastor is manipulative and evil. i think alastyr getting fucked up in the finale right after an episode where alastor explicitly tells charlie smiling is a tool to make yourself appear stronger is like. meant to drive home a point that alastor is a fucked up guy who enjoys levying power over those around him because he's actually weak and powerless and he's willing to claw his way into power with whatever underhanded tactic he likes to free himself with clear disregard for others. i think that's the point of the fucking character.

they also noted that they disliked the whole radio vs video think but like, i think that also has a purpose. like yes, the song is just about vox and alastor having their little back and forth. but i think the main point is that alastor is here to fuck up the status quo, vox has established order and stability and alastor is going to change that. it's like. i dont think this is abt ego i think its about alastor being establish as a villain. because he is. hebis not here to do good things.

the only thing i disliked abt alastor is umgg the voodoo stuff and the resemblence to a w*ndigo because yeah, wow, that's bad!! they should have changed that!! but also, the fact alastor ends up taking up all the characterisation leaves very little for the rest of the cast who should have been more of the focus i think. u would think the plot cares about the HOTEL because it's the HAZBIN HOTEL but instead it ends up being about this overbranching stuff and that's just too much for an 8 ep season man.

anyways the real crime is everything to do with angel dust because yes we all knew he was going to be written badly but it still sucksss it sucks so muchh. he needed far more time for development but instead he gets barely anything.

[transgaypiratesanta]

so I’ve seen some posts of quotes from the oxventure, and OH BOY. I have full-on NOTES about the oxventure and every piece of canon and fan theories I can get my grubby little paws on, AND I HAVE A LOT OF QUOTES. SO…. HAVE FUN WITH THESE!

DND

“Spicy… like a rat.”

“You asked the whales name?” “I’m just thoughtful like that.”

“Always check your bonfires for hedgehogs.”

“Needless to say Cthulhu is pleased and lunch is ruined”

“Oh no the cube! Not the cube!”

“He looks like dob but somehow evil and sexy”

“Nooooo… my mojo…”

“Oh you totally give the baby a dagger!” “That’s parenting 101”

“I flinch greasily.”

“Guys be real are we murder hobo’s?”

“I just wanna say I’m really proud of the amount of murder we’ve done.”

“Have you heard of the guild of the national trust?”

“Oo man I can’t wait to get redemption let’s kill everyone.”

“Do you have pamphlets?” “Let’s bore them to death!”

“Decisive action: throw that cat.”

“I have a moral objection but I’m going to let it happen because this seems cool.”

“🎵it’s getting hot in here. And they will all explode🎵”

“I lick the book and I am pleased”

“I know a lot of my plans revolve around watching dob sleep”

“Shut your filthy mouth Corazon”

“Let’s have a spooky sleepover.”

“Nature is beautiful.” “It sure was”

“+4! +2! +2! NUMBERS!”

“It’s not on fire or anything!” “Not yet, give me time!”

“We’re gonna have a sleepover in this crypt!”

“It couldn’t have been me-meant? If it wasn’t already… broked. That’s what I’ve always said”

“🎵maaaagic hand! Come out of my real hand!🎵”

“Wear whatever you want! Your bones, probably.”

“Their prudence hat”

“Is it orphans? You gotta tell us if it is.” “Ah. It’s orphans boss.”

“Skeletons… AHHHHHH”

“I love these loophole skeletons!”

“I would like to attempt to cast mend on the orphans”

“We just want less orphan juice”

“I’m imagining you making a snowman out of orphan paste”

“Oooo Skeletons be dexterous”

“We’re all team skeleton just some of us have flesh on top”

“I never liked you Kevin”

“Guys I’m not not in trouble”

“And then I turn the internal heat dial to cremation”

“BETTER OUT THAN IN DOES NOT APPLY TO ORGANS”

“MY ORGANS!”

“Do you want a vomit hug?”

“I’m putting my foot down on the husks.” “But then they’d just burst!”

“Is it bad that bear me wants to eat the husks? No I won’t I’ll be good”

“And I’m trying desperately to remain eye contact with HER, and not look at you guys swimming around in sandwiches”

“It’s in runes or something what is that?” “That’s a seven.”

“The consequences! They’re here again!”

“Meowwww” “I DONT KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!”

“Awh. And I’ve got his BOOTS!”

“Dob what did I tell you about necromancy?”

“Let’s put capitalism in the lake!”

“We can always claim it’s the fireworks show!” “NOT IF WE’RE DEAD!”

“Dogs are bound in skin!”

“MERILWEN THERES A BEAR! GO TURN INTO A BEAR OR FIGHT IT… or marry it… or something”

“Have we tried to befriend the footprints?” “Talk to the footprints!”

“Two very impulsive boi’s”

“Grease man from the ocean”

“Respectfully yeet him off the mountain.” “A somber yeet”

“If I was in something for 2 years”

“I saw the holes on the front and thought ‘that must be all the holes’ but then I looked on the back and there was ANOTHER HOLE THERE!”

“What are you dreaming about?” “Salmon.”

“Oh no they’ll take over the world with inexpensive furniture!”

“Break his spirit.” “And his back 😈”

“3 dimensional chess is just chess!”

“AUGH. OH YES. BISQUE 😩”

“What’s in this drawer? Dob? Oh no that’s a paperclip.” 

“Person in charge of the Prudence mech”

“🎵yees I’m the best at thunderwave turns out!🎵”

“My shin!” “My Shin!” “… our Shin.”

“DID YOU JUST SUGGEST MERILWEN COMMIT AUTOCANNIBALISIM IN BEAR FORM?”

“I’m just a chicken walking around with a flameblade”

“🎵Eleanor rigbee, lived in a hive because she was a bee. Whooedy whee!🎵”

“The pirate. Didn’t. Say that.”

“This is the energy in the room we’re all going to regret later” “says that of the orphanage.” “I regretted it later!”

“Though he could discover spoons at any point”

“Phase one: walk to crime. Phase two: do crime”

“I’ll just do it and be a legend”

“In a way we’re already married in a very deep and legal way.” “For tax purposes.”

“Why is there so much tentacle milk here?”

“You just hear anarchy noises from out the window”

“We’re running out of time before he murders us accidentally with an idiom” “with beans”

“I’m buying ecstasy from an owl?”

“The sounds of muffled pirate violence”

“She might just destroy the world, which is where we keep all our stuff!”

“I faint.” “Okay dob’s having a short rest” “OH YEAH!”

“Thick orange hot water”

“She’s got the cutest little forces of darkness 🥰”

“As the Druid, no.” “As the dm, INSPIRATION!”

“I cast shatter on the only planet we have”

“I cast fracking”

“WE. ARE. COASTAL!”

“The eldrich being Flannery”

“We’re fracking landlords”

“Now we leave you and see if you go buduhduhduhduh”

“Cattle go missing, we never find out what happens to all the Harris’s” “season over.”

“It’s practically a victimless crime, unless there’s a victim, in which case hopefully it’s a hard to trace crime”

“I grease Merilwen to give her the best chance”

“WHY AM I DYING?”

“Because you told me to piss off!” “So you did THIS?” “yeah” “I HAVE MINUTES TO LIVE!” 

“How’s the shat?”

“I cast mending on our friendship 🥺”

“How does a jackle… lift a bunch of cars?” “I don’t know.” “You jack ‘em all.” *weird laughter*

“Yes. No more pain where you’re going friend. No, you’re not very nice actually.”

“Well, solved the Richard problem!” “But what about the Dob problem”

“It’s very demeaning, so okay.”

“Well no Millie or ori that is obviously not okay. Little idiot.”

“Oh I HATE nature”

“Who wants in on my corpse sled idea?”

“Dob.” *quiet laughter* “oh no.”

“I give them an appraising look as if sizing up their corpses”

“I am literally everyone else in the world which means I am the best at sighing crying sad goodbying to my plot, the npc’s, the sanctity of lore…”

“These patrons aren’t gonna lick themselves!”

“Ohhhh it’s a sex thing.”

“Rule 3 no kink shaming.” “Damn right.”

“He drifts out the door… to go find something to kiss.”

“WAIT! I’ve had a thought! I want to kiss the dragon man.”

“Well. You’ve effed this right up Dob.”

“Well, if you’re dreaming about that, it’s probably out to get you.” “Every time you sleep, it gets a little bit closer.”

“It is always agonising Johnny!”

“Let me use my bonus action to slip in my own grease”

“All things must drink. I say wisely, and inaccurately”

“You take 4 points of… becoming soup damage”

“It occurs to all of you, and pardon my infernal, this is a shit idea.”

“Why do i have find steed if it’s not a rodeo?”

“I cough up some hemp and rope.” “Oh perfectly horrifying! Sure, yeah.”

“We never elected a leader!” “How could you talk to your leader like that?”

“I like turning into a cat all the time, the problem is I can’t do it.”

“that horny crew member sticks his head out to watch”

“So it’s slightly uncomfortable… and you outlive all your lovers… sounds like a good thing!”

“I wish to arrest Cthulhu now start screaming”

BLADES IN THE DARK

“Sir we’re in an antique shop.”

“What a great excuse to do some crime, though!”

“Nothing bad has ever happened to me in my entire life, I don’t think it’s going to start now!”

“Is it meant to be on fire? Because it’s on fire.”

“ITS A MASTERCLASS! It’s not a masterclass…”

“Classic squiffy, what a lad.”

“Hey! I need you to do me a favour! Well I say a favour, I’m compelling you.”

“We do a literal hitman, as in you run up, and hit the man.”

“He’ll live, but not well.”

“Spinning tops in places you don’t want them”

“I want a ghost who’s obsessed with me!”

“Everyone’s going out the front door! I’m just gonna set the house on fire!”

“Here’s what happens Barnaby, you glorious liability.”

“Have you heard about this thing called a union?” “… Let’s montage the rest of this conversation”

“Roll me for ‘Dave? Dave!’”

“Barbaby and workers rights are on the opposite end on the political spectrum”

“It’s not apoplectic with rage, it’s apoplectic with being right.”

“Fresh fish!” “Lovely crimes!”

“It’s going terribly here in the present! Maybe it went better in the past!” “Let’s retreat to the safety of the past.”

“I didn’t want to taste the sweat of the poor in the air!”

“So you want to be a nice, clean, sanitised butcher?”

“It’s like riding a bike” “a violent bike” “it’s like punching a bike”

“I came here to study ghosts, not become one!” “Imagine how much study you could do if you became one!” “I can’t hold pens!”

“The gilded idiot”

“Hands in the middle. Aaaaand dead Barnaby!”

“I’m choking a guy out… with my thighs”

“I smile. In a way that  conveys limitless rage”

“I do not want to be traumatised because of archiving!”

“Won’t someone think of the molluscs?”

“Lilly and Zilly on a wedding adventure”

“Generally I judge things, but sometimes I choke them unconscious”

“The tiny urchins really wanted us to do it”

“No one tell him he has NO SOUL”

“Who is this anthropomorphic mouse?” (It was a child)

“Sorry I tried to fix it with fish”

“I’m going to start a clock that the wonderful mechanical man is working on without any of you”

“Are these children going to be okay?” “We’re they okay to begin with?”

“Stop making out with that brick!” “I’m not- do you know what making out is, Edvard?”

“I let my hatred of stairs get the better of me”

“I’m furious at my forearm.”

“It’s a piece of trash! Looks like something Edvard would make!”

“Mechanical man parts”

“Moving on briefly from infanticide, good job, I just asked you for your name”

“A healing cloak is quite hard to fill so I thought stuff that, I’ve acquired 2 giant goats”

DEADLANDS

“How old are you?” “Old enough. Are you old enough to make good decisions?” 

“No more digging graves for neat, I’m gonna be putting people in graves for money!”

“I had a mule once.”

“That’s adulthood. Being angry all the time, but pushing it down until it’s the right time.”

“Have you ever met someone in your life who doesn’t like jerky?”

“I REMEMBER IT BEING A SIN”

“Let’s hope they’re extremely religious”

“Yeah well Andy’s lying, Andy wants us to fail.”

“I like to drink milk after I shoot two men in the throat”

“Very well then, Mr… not free”

“As you pass by the door, it does clip on the brim of your hat and it falls over your eyes and you can’t see anything.”

“Okay, okay.” *silence* “AAAAAAAH”

“I look at the other one, which seems like his spirit it hasn’t been broken yet 😡”

“I’m saying it nicely but in my head im like: I will kill you later.”

“Not trying to be rude, why do you smell so bad? I’m not trying very hard”

“Contracted late-stage tuberculosis. Got better.”

“Animal that’s been jerked”

“Tell me your life story”

“JERRY WHY”

“Horses can play, and you’re worried about if they can sit?”

“I’ve got a d8, but it’s now -2, because I’m DEAD”

*stabs someone in the eye* “oh sorry, I simply stopped paying attention!”

“Heck. Furthermore, dang.”

“One of the strangulation ones.” “Oh fun!”

“Is sharp rope a thing? WELL SHARPEN IT.”

“Sticky mc bang bang!”

“It was a terrible crime, I cut my lawn and i cut it too short. Anyway I’m to be hanged.”

“The cell is now swarming with ants.” “Yay!”

“Murder, for example, would be a no no!”

“He’s the same old Nate he’s just soft and cold”

[writingwhimsey]

How Does A Good Girl Go To Hell? Ch. 6

Chapter 6: Purpose

After my talk with Lucifer, I had decided to make the most of my time here, however long that may be. I decided to meet with Charlie.

I sat on the couch in the lobby with her. “So, Ariel what's up?” Charlie asked me. “Are you ready to give redemption a shot?”

I took a deep breath. “I talked with your dad a few days ago. I learned some things… and I've been doing a lot of soul searching since then…and I'm not even sure I want to get into Heaven now.”

Charlie blinked at me in surprise. “I uh…that's a pretty big decision…”

I nodded. “But with your permission, I'd still like to stay at the hotel and help. Since we don't know if redemption is even possible, the least we can do is try to help others. To at the very least give souls a safe place to stay…and maybe even make things better.”

Charlie looked at me in astonishment. “You…”

“So, can I stay?” I asked. “Maybe I can be of help.”

Charlie smiled at me. “OF COURSE YOU CAN STAY!” She exclaimed. “And honestly, you wanting to help sounds like a wonderful idea.

I returned her smile. “I'm glad you feel that way. Thank you.”

Charlie was excitedly pulling me into a hug. “I'm just glad to see you decided to stay and the immense progress you have made over your short time here.”

The other residents had started to come down to the lobby. Charlie's excitement had caught their attention. “Uh…babe, what's going on here?” Vaggie asked, eyeing me suspiciously.

“Ariel has decided to stay!” Charlie exclaimed, releasing me and moving over to stand beside Vaggie.

Veggies took Charlie's hand in hers. “That's great, babe.”

Angel was coming over to me. “So, ya decided ta give redemption a shot, huh?”

“Should be a piece of cake for someone like you.” Husk said. “You were already a good girl in life.”

“Actually, I'm not staying to be redeemed.” I clarified. “I want to stay and help the good souls. Whether redemption is possible or not, I at least want to help make a safe place for people here. Help people find the good in themselves. Because I���I don't think Hell has to be bad.”

Everyone had come down to the lobby by this point, listening to me. Including Lucifer and Alastor. “Ha ha ha!” Alastor laughed. “That seems even more hair-brained than the idea of redemption!”

I glared at the radio demon. “Laugh all you want, that doesn't change my mind or the way that I feel about this.”

Lucifer was staring at me with wide eyes. “That…how did you come to that decision?” He asked.

I turned to look at him. “You actually.”

Lucifer blinked and pointed at himself. “Me? Really? How?”

“Our talk the other day…it just made me realize that not everything is as black and white as I had thought. And not everyone is evil.” I explained. “Nothing here is how I thought it would be. And so I want to help find the good here.”

“You… you really got that from our talk?” he asked in disbelief.

I nodded. “Yes.”

Charlie smiled at her dad. “I knew you would be a big help, Dad.” She was then turning to me. “Alright, let's go work on a strategy for helping our sinners.”

I nodded. “Alright.” 

Charlie linked her arm through mine and then we were off to plan. For the first time since my arrival in Hell, I felt like I had a purpose…and it made me happy.

Lucifer…

Lucifer watched Ariel walk off with Charlie. He couldn't keep the stunned expression off his face. He had helped someone. Someone who had come here hating him.

He couldn't help but to think Ariel had a glow about her now as she walked off with Charlie. She had a purpose now…a purpose HE had helped her discover. 

He watched her standing off to the side with Charlie, making plans. She seemed animated as she talked and listened with Charlie. She seemed so full of life and hope now. And…he hadn't seen anything so beautiful in a long time.

“You alright over there, yer highness?” Angel asked.

Lucifer was pulled to his senses. He straightened his posture, putting his hands on his lapels and straightening his vest while puffing out his chest. “Of course I am. I was just surprised that's all.”

Angel and Husk shared a look. “Yeah, sure let's go with that.” Husk said.

Alastor was watching the king of Hell and a smile came to his face. “Well if there's nothing left to do, I'll bid you all adue. I have other plans.” He was then disappearing.

“Good riddance.” Lucifer said, glaring at the now empty space Alastor had been standing.

“So…uh King…” Angel said, getting his attention.

“Yeah?” Lucifer asked.

“Uh…just curious what ya told Ariel that made her come to her decision and all. I wasn't even aware yous two had talked much after ya picked her up from the bar.”

“Oh…she just had some questions for me.” Lucifer answered. “It…it wasn't anything special.” He didn't want to tell them he had told her his story. He didn't want to share it with them…it didn't feel right to tell them.

“I see.” Angel replied.

“Why don't you come over and have a drink?” Husk offered.

Lucifer nodded. “Sure.”

The trio moved over to the bar. Husk poured some drinks for everyone. Lucifer sipped at his drink and his eyes kept wandering over to Ariel. She captured his attention in a way she hadn't before.

Husk and Angel shared a look. Husk cleared his throat. “So, your majesty, what do you think of Ariel’s decision?”

“I think it sounds great.” Lucifer answered. She reminds me of my dream. He added mentally. “I'm glad she found a purpose.”

“Yeah. I'm glad to see her looking happy.” Angel said.

Lucifer nodded. “Yeah…she's smiling now. She has a pretty smile.”

Husk and Angel looked at each other. Both of them coming to the same conclusion before nodding to each other. It seemed something was happening…and it appeared it was a good thing both for Ariel and the king.

Lucifer continued to watch Ariel as he sipped his drink. A funny feeling began to bubble up in his chest. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling…it actually felt warm… familiar but still new. He wasn't sure what it was but she was clearly stirring something in him. He couldn't help but to feel glad that this soul had come to Hell.

[showtoonzfan]

I hope people don't take this as acephobic but Alastor being ace doesn't even make much sense to me? He was a serial killer in his previous life and most male serial killers were driven by misogyny and sexual sadism (moreso the latter for the gay ones). Like even his interactions with Charlie seem like he's trying to seduce her for his next kill or something. Let's not even get into the optics of making your one ace character be a mass-murdering psycho that represents the worst of cishet misogyny, it's just a weird pairing. Also his backstory kinda ruins the mistake of this random demon that was killing all the big bosses for power, and killing for power isn't exactly the motivation of most serial killers either? If they didn't have the serial killer part him being ace would work better I think, why not give that to Husk that only seems to care about booze or Cherri who's in a seemingly platonic relationship with Angel? Seems she just slapped it onto a random character based on a joke interaction. I really hope people don't take this the wrong way.

Eh, wouldn’t say Alastor was seducing Charlie, more of he was playing it safe and acting like he had no tricks up his sleeve while literally openly mocking her, but as for him being Ace, to me personally while I don’t have an issue with the concept (like as long as the show knows this dude is evil and doesn’t insinuate that ace people are bad, it’s fine in my book cause I’m all here for representation regardless if it’s a bad character or not) but my personal issue was like…it just didn’t feel like it needed to be there. Like…the only reason he’s ace is because he was described to be “obsessed with himself” and that doesn’t automatically mean you need to make a character ace. It felt like it wasn’t something Viv had planned out and only slapped that title on him at the last minute because…..why not more representation points, despite the fact that….let’s not forget the pilot itself never outright said he was ace either, which I find more suspicious.

Also I always immediately disregard the “but serial killers”- argument for Al because let’s be honest, Viv not only doesn’t do research but doesn’t think deep when creating certain characters. The only time I felt his serial killer title didn’t make sense was how he is introduced as this unapologetic evil murderer who does everything for laughs, and then suddenly has this forced moral compass about respecting those lower than him, like seriously wtf was Vivzie thinking when writing that?

Overall however, in my eyes, she wanted an edgy scary demon lord, and him being a serial killer felt more like a quick excuse to find a reason why he’s in hell, basically what I’m saying is…..Al doesn’t have that many layers to him, hence why I don’t think too much about these things, but I DO agree that someone like Husk or Cherri being ace would make more sense or just…be better, mainly Husk since he clearly isn’t looking for love and is dead inside, but we can’t have that cause Uwu Angel needs to flirt with him so—

[hazbincalifornia]

Hazbin Liveblog: Episode 5

That promo picture is encouraging, let's gooo!

Bedheaded Vaggie is adorable. I love her.

HUSK HAS A FUCK MONDAYS MUG

Everybody seeming concerned except for Niffty is great. Also, frazzled Charlie hair is cute. Me before I brush my hair, tbh.

Have we seen Charlie in just her suspenders in the 'main' series? I rewatched the second half of the pilot more than the first so it's the look I really liked on her, too bad it's showing her as down to her last rope here.

Huh, I was wondering how that worked! I imagine Lucifer, since he can only see the evil in humans, bargained to save Hellborns in exchange for Exterminations being only targeted at the 'just evil' Sinners, since Heaven probably said 'it's this or we kill everyone'.

AMON SPOTTED IN CHARLIE'S CONTACTS... which means that my Aamon is spelled wrong. Oh well. Not gonna bother fixing that, it'll differentiate them if he ever shows up anyway.

I like how all the egg boys have different contacts, but they're still labeled 1, 2, 3, ect. Do they all have their own phones?

Big bombshell that Lilith and Lucifer split, but all I'm looking at is that little drawing of Angel as an actual spider in the background.

Oh, of COURSE Niffty would want him.

I like how, as opposed to the strained faces in the Loo Loo Land portrait, Lilith, Charlie, and Lucifer all genuinely look happy in their portrait- wide grins and happy eyes. There was something at some point, it just... didn't last.

Huh. He really is a goof.

Staring at the giant pile of ducks with 'important things' is great. I'm not sure really how to feel about him yet? I wonder how people who were 'fans' of him think of this. (He's one of the 'I'm waiting for canon to see how I feel before getting attached' characters, like the Vees.)

I always sort of assumed that the building itself came from Lucifer, I don't remember if that was something mentioned at some point or just a headcanon that I had, but now that makes me wonder, does she just have mountains of Princess Cash that she bought it with if he didn't even know?

Huh, he still wears a gold ring on his pinkie finger?

Angel's 'oh god this is cringy but I feel bad for her' expressions are top-notch but I'm wheezing at Husk's flat-mouthed stare and Pent's fucking.... crying cat face. They don't know what to do with Niffty so she's just got a blank smile.

Oh hey, some kind of diagram of the rings! They'll be easier to look at than the shot of the elevator in Ozzie's!

If they only had an hour to clean up, I see why the 'it's a boy!' banner from that one promo clip was there, lmao.

OH MY GOD HE IS TINY, I thought that was just perspective in that one show but he's actually shorter than Vaggie, holy shit

Have we seen Razzle and Dazzle before now? I imagine we just haven't had time to fit them in before now.

Shaking the scepter is funnier than it has any right to be, and Charlie and Husk have basically the exact same expression in the background.

The fact that this is Alastor's first on-screen swear is hysterical. He probably expected Lucifer would know of him but he's taken down a peg- I doubt Luci's paid any attention to individual sinners since the split with Lilith. Beautiful.

I physically cringe into myself with second-hand embarrassment from tv. I did not think the series would provoke that response in me as often as it does, but then again, I don't watch the interview portion of the pilot much, so it probably should have been expected.

Alastor: On one hand, I dislike the idea of being with Charlie. On the other, I need to fuck with this guy for insulting me.

Hey, at least he's not homophobic about it.

You know, from Angel, that feels like he's genuinely trying to make a good impression.

Oh. Oh I normally try to save changing icons but I HAVE to change to Alastor on that pan. My Brand. I just spent like five minutes opening up prime on my computer to get it from there, change it on twitter, and come back here.

I have to say, I did NOT expect the Lucifer song to be Lucifer and Alastor going back and forth but I kind of love it? Also, a flash of the fun neon colors from his pilot song!

Oh my god, I made a comment on the spoiler twitter joking about how it's funny imagining Alastor doing the boring shit an actual facility manager would do but he actually DOES unclog toilets and shit. Fucking incredible. (Granted, it being Niffty means it was probably a special case. Cute that she called him 'sir' though.)

On one hand, a thousand Charlastor cries at this. On the other, him making 'I'm more of a father to her than you are (and I literally met her like two months ago)' his play is a diabolical move.

(I did hear about those leaked character audition sheets that indicated Alastor's age jumped up from his mid-thirties to his mid-forties. My joke about how Angel finds out 17-18 year old Stellaluna has a crush on him and just 'man, kid, daddy issues much?' and she's just 'shut the fuck up' is even stronger now, even though she's actually got a generally-fine relationship with her dads, it's mostly screwed because of outside forces.)

I wonder if that thing going around the Viv might have wanted Weird Al for Lucifer was due to the accordion thing. Probably not, I can see how the personality got her there, but still. Funny.

I feel for Charlie in all this.

Well, Mimzy was unexpected!

I like how Husk looks completely unimpressed while the others are confused. What do you wanna bet she just pops up around Alastor once in a while so he's used to her pulling this?

She's fun! I like her.

Ha, called Husk didn't like her. There's a lot of good background stuff in this episode as the characters react to stuff.

Having Mimzy (as a friend of Alastor's) recount the story fits into things a lot better, and I like the idea that he didn't just go on a giant bloody rampage that first day but started with something more sneaky. I think it fits better.

I was curious if this bit would be in this episode. Alastor's been a bit... tame, in previous episodes? He mostly seemed to aim snark generally or at those who 'deserve' it like Vox, it's great to see him being more of a 'villain' to Husk to really hammer in that while he's different from Val, the comparisons in Loser aren't just surface-level.

Making loan sharks actual sharks is great. Also, Mimzy running over the dude's girlfriend makes me like her even more.

As someone who is Literally Here because a friend told me Alastor was a cannibal after I watched the pilot and it got me interested enough to jot off a oneshot where he shrinks someone and eats them and then start poking around in the fandom, this pleases me down to my very bones.

Huh. With the knowledge that Lucifer and Lilith are separated, Alastor was gone the same amount of time she was, Husk's comment about how he's on a leash too, and now he's genuinely trying to uphold the idea of the hotel in some small part... I really wonder if Lilith did actually task him with this in some way, especially with a comment someone made about how him showing up moments after Charlie called her mom in the pilot might not be just how the scenes shook out.

Oh, this song is so sweet. Lilith having no face in the flashback is A Choice though, especially with how her card is faceless with just a mouth as well. (Which may even tie back to the idea of her working with Alastor- it's the same sort of grin he has.)

The animation here is... a little wonky though. It feels like it's a bit 'movement for the sake of movement' again, wanting it to look fluid but without certain direction. The song itself is lovely, though.

Vaggie's got something to hide, doesn't she? Does... does Charlie not know if she's a fallen angel?

[xaracosmia]

ꕥ — WELCOME TO NEFE COSMIA, RAKAN (STAR GUARDIAN). 🌓

ꕥ  — OOC INFORMATION;

name / alias: hunter age: 24 pronouns: she/they/it ooc contact: snearthworm on twt other characters in xc: adante (oc), ruby rose (rwby)

ꕥ  — IC INFORMATION;

name: rakan  age: 21+ physically, actually a baby immortal and has been kicking around for ummm. a couple decades probably. who’s to say.  pronouns: he/they series: league of legends (star guardian universe) canon point: pre-redemption, right in the middle of his evilness  app triggers: canon-typical violence, self-sacrifice 

personality: 

rakan can’t help it if being bad just feels sooo good! 

c’mooon, is it really his fault if this corruption just brings out the sparkle in his eye? he’s embraced evil like it’s all a game to him, as if the suffering left in his wake is nothing more than a corny joke. that’s the problem with these “good guys” -- they’re all just nerds that take themselves way too seriously. it’s way more fun to let your spirit die and accept that love isn’t always enough to save you. like him! 

has he mentioned yet that his eyes sparkle? if rakan embodied anything other than evil, it would be hotness. definitely hotness. the easiest way to distract him is with a mirror, because hello, have you seen him? if you looked as good as he does, you’d be a little vain too. he just takes his vanity to the extreme, ‘cause why do anything halfway when you could do it…uh, fullway!  

also, moral codes are for losers. super important to him that you know that. (blah, blah, don’t release void creatures on a busy street, rakan!) (blah, blah, we know you still remember who you are, rakan!) jeez louise, grow a sense of humor already. he’s just here to have fun! sure, his idea of fun means dousing the world in fire and chaos, but hey, it’s not like it’s his fault!  

he’s just a husk. remember? 

the rakan you probably knew is long gone. all being selfless and kind got him was a lonely headstone, so if you really want to reminisce about old ghosts and warm smiles, you can go visit that instead. just leave him out of it. 

the corruption deteoriating both his mind and body has pushed most human emotions far past his own reach. there’s not much left now, and what does still remains fades more each day. there are only twisted, detached impressions of things like love and loss. and fleeting thrills of twisted joy that he chases, chases, loses-- agh, he hates being bored! 

why does he need to remember who he is, anyways? maybe he likes the way he is now! being bad just feels sooooo good! 

(maybe there’s another reason he spends so much time staring into mirrors.) 

your muse’s greatest strength: his stunning good looks, duh. can’t defeat the forces of good without looking good! please, make sure you get his hot angles when he’s busy destroying everything pure and bringing about a new age of darkness. ooh, riku, that reminds him, have you seen his hair gel? he’s almost out. 

something your muse struggles with: sometimes when the skies are particularly silent, he can still hear the first star calling to him. 

history / background: they used to call it being “sparked.” that’s when the first star appears to you and asks you to take up the mantle of whatever heroes were just unlucky enough to get turned into stardust. that’s the fate of every star guardian, rakan would one day find out. to burn bright, burn fast, and then burn out. 

rakan was young when he was called. he didn’t know any better. he had just wanted to do good. 

there were others like him too -- all put under the same banner, the same team, a little family of lost, do-gooder kids led by a friend just as young and fresh-faced as they were. (it had been a friend, right? he and ahri, hadn’t they been close in the old days? it hurts his head to try and remember.)

but if there’s just one good thing that ever came out of protecting the universe -- and trust him, it was the best thing that ever happened to him -- it was meeting xayah. kind of cliche to fall head over heels in love with your best friend and teammate, but he and xayah absolutely rocked the cliches! they were the “lovebirds.” sickeningly sweet and completely in-sync. he remembers that. he would never want to forget. 

it still wasn’t enough to save them. 

there was a lonely planet. a fight. a terrible, horrible fight -- they weren’t ready for the horrors that had laid in wait, or to confront one of the many faces of true darkness. their team was overpowered. rakan died. 

there’s a funny thing about dying though. it’s said that even after your heart stops, it still takes a few moments for your senses to fade. and as rakan laid bleeding on that little lonely planet, he knew that ahri was abandoning him and xayah. she was taking their last standing teammate and running with her tail between her legs. 

if it had just been him that she was leaving behind, rakan wouldn’t have blamed her. but it wasn’t just him. when ahri stepped into that portal and let it close behind her like the coward she truly was… rakan died with no pain greater than knowing that xayah was still alive. 

xayah never would have left him. she stayed with him until the very end.  

but there’s one other funny thing about dying. sometimes when there are forces of evil at work, dying doesn’t always stick. 

when rakan next opened his eyes, the world felt different. he was an agent of zoe’s now, a thrall to the dark star. kind of ironic he was working for his own murderer, but the only thing that mattered to him now was that xayah was still with him. lost to her own rage, but not lost forever -- not if he had anything to say about it. 

as the two waged war on the forces of good, rakan was able to keep his own corruption at bay. it took a lot of planning, more planning than he’d ever had to use his pretty head for in his life, but it turned out simple at the end. deliver xayah to the star guardians (in a pretty roundabout way, considering it was by trying to kill them), betray zoe, and then use his own light to purify xayah’s corruption and take it all into himself so he could explode in a fiery ball of evil doom and take zoe out with him!

it almost went perfectly. xayah was redeemed and saved, and rakan did explode in a fiery ball of evil doom. there was just one unfortunate complication he was trying to avoid. zoe didn’t die, and…neither did he. 

he came back again. worse. 

whatever pieces of his gentle nature he had been able to hold onto were gone now. rakan fully embraced his role as agent of chaos, harbinger of destruction, lord of all things evil. he still remembers the rage and betrayal, amplified tenfold by xayah’s darkness within him, and he’s going to use that to help him accomplish his own little personal goal: destroy the star guardians and everything they love. 

  powers / abilities: 

VOID MAGIC: as a result of his corruption (or a “gift” from the dark star, no returns allowed), rakan is able to weave the very fabric of chaos. the exact limits of his magic are murky at best. he can open portals, summon dangerous void creatures, charm humans, and wield it like energy. it’s wild and unpredictable, sometimes not even obeying his own commands -- just like the way he likes it. 

LIGHT MAGIC: unknown to even him, the potential still lurks inside him. originally bestowed upon him by the first star, this is the magic that every star guardian wields. they use light as constructs to fight the darkness, making it particularly effective against void creatures. 

inherent abilities:

VOID CORRUPTION: rakan has been tainted by the dark star’s power, dimming his light and shrouding his soul. unfortunately, it’s also in the process of driving him entirely mad. the corruption is what gives him access to his void magics, but it also takes a terrible toll on his body, causing physical pain at times and transformations that…make even him uneasy. as the corruption progresses, the sickness grows deeper, and he risks eventually losing himself to a monstrous form entirely. 

VASTAYAN HERITAGE: rakan is vastaya, a chimeric race of of humans from a distant star. his particular subspecies has avian characteristics, which is why he has those wonky ears, a single feathered wing, feetie talons, and a feathered tail. he can disguise most of this with magic when he so desires, but normally keeps the ears at all times. they’re great for hearing things. 

BATTLEDANCING: aka, his very unique fighting style. he doesn’t use weapons, only magic and hand-to-hand combat. he’s particularly graceful and impossible to pin down in a fight. 

items / weapons: 

SOUL GEM: rakan’s soul/light is connected to his gem, which is currently cracked and brimming with corruption. his former team leader is still holding onto a large shard of it, but it doesn’t affect him - mostly it just annoys him. 

RIKU: his familiar and tiny bestie/wingman/evil minion. riku chirps in a language comprehensible only to guardians, and as a piece of rakan’s living soul, is also jaded and corrupted at present. he’s a vain little guy, but very protective of rakan. 

starting ability: very weak void magic

starting item: riku! 

extra: 

if you looked up babygirl in the dictionary, rakan’s picture would be right next to the entry 

discord id: princeofevil.xc

[rnelodyy]

I cannot get over how Obsessed Belos is with Caleb. It’s SO wild, and the deeper you dig the sadder and more disturbing it becomes.

Like,,, Caleb was literally all he had growing up. Their parents were gone, they were (presumably) homeless, they were two street rats trying their best to make it on their own. Caleb was the older sibling, so the weight of caring for Philip fell on his shoulders, even though he was just a kid himself.

And considering the motif of coping through stories (Luz finding comfort in Azura after her dad’s death, Hunter finding comfort in Cosmic Frontier while trying to cope with the fact that he’s a clone), I wouldn’t be surprised if Caleb tried to do something similar for Philip. From Belos’s memories, we can see they used to play pretend a LOT. It’s a lot less scary for a young child if they believe they’re going on wild and wacky adventures than to know the truth – that they’re homeless orphans, moving into a community that regularly hangs people for witchcraft, with Caleb having to do hard labor to afford food and housing and sending his brother to school, while having to sacrifice his own education and skip meals so Philip doesn’t need to go hungry.

Caleb used stories to shield Philip from the worst of their life, which blinded Philip to just how bad his brother was suffering. To Philip, life in Gravesfield was good, but it was only good because of how much Caleb was sacrificing for him.

So when Caleb met Evelyn, of course he took the chance to escape his shitty life. It may have even been a situation like Luz, where he only expected to be gone for a short time, and either returned to find Philip gone, or ended up being trapped on the Isles for longer than he’d anticipated.

Philip, meanwhile, is fucking Losing It. Caleb was his whole world, and now he's just gone, spirited away by an evil witch just like those stories they’d been playing out their whole lives. It may even be a situation like King, where Caleb knew he wasn’t being truthful with the witch hunter stories, but Philip genuinely believed them all.

So Philip goes into the Demon Realm, determined to rescue his brother. He’s practiced this, he’s trained for this, he just needs to find Caleb, save him from whatever tortures that witch has been inflicting on him, open up a portal back to Gravesfield, and everything will go back to normal. So he travels, he meets witches, he kills them, he either gets cursed or discovers that eating Palismen gives him funny powers, so he keeps doing that.

And then, after years of searching, he finds Caleb. Not chained up in a dungeon, or turned into a frog, or a shambling husk of his former self, but free. Happier and healthier than Philip has ever seen him. 

Philip tries to grab Caleb and leave with him, but Caleb refuses. The witch who lured him away is his wife now. He’s got a house and a job and a kid on the way. He’s got a Palisman, this stupid fucking red bird that follows him everywhere. Caleb’s good here. He’s not leaving.

And I think Philip just fucking loses it at that point. What do you MEAN you’re not leaving?! We were adventurers! We were gonna be witch hunters together! We were going to do everything together! Did she do something to you? Did you just hate me that much? 

Caleb tries to de-escalate, but eventually loses his temper himself. We weren’t adventurers, we were street rats! I was working so YOU could go to school, I was starving myself so YOU wouldn’t have to, I sacrificed EVERYTHING so you’d have a chance at life! You’re old enough to handle yourself now, it’s time to grow up and let me live my own life!

Phil’s not having it. There’s a fight, someone draws a knife, and… we all know how that one ends.

Fast-forward a bit. Philip, now alone and stranded on the Isles, has latched onto the stories he and Caleb used to play pretend with. He’s going to make them come true. He’s going to kill every witch in one fell swoop, become Witch Hunter General, and he’s going to do all of it with his brother by his side.

So he asks for the Collector’s help, and together, they make a Grimwalker.

Philip decides that this is his chance. He can raise this new Caleb properly, make sure that his brother isn’t swayed by the evils of witchcraft again. The new Caleb doesn’t look exactly the same but it’s fine. Having him back is good enough.

And then the new Caleb betrays him too.

Maybe he befriended some witches, maybe he tried to learn magic, maybe he had some reservations about the whole genocide plan. Either way, this Caleb has gone the same way as the first. 

So Philip kills him, and starts over with a new Grimwalker. This time he’s gonna get it right. This Caleb is gonna be the one.

But he’s not. He betrays Philip again. So Philip starts over again, tightening the leash this time. New-new-new Caleb can’t leave his sight, isn’t allowed to talk to people without Philip there, because it’s dangerous. But strict parents make sneaky children, and Philip catches new-new-new Caleb making out with a secret witch partner behind his back.

Philip realizes he needs to change his approach. Caleb isn’t listening to him? Well, he’ll make him listen. He makes the next one younger, establishes himself as an authority figure (dad feels too personal, so uncle it is), and makes himself the focal point of this new Caleb’s life. Continuing to call him Caleb feels weird, especially since there’s such a significant age difference between them now, so he gives this one a new name.

They’re going to be witch hunters, so he names the new one Hunter. It’s hilarious when you think about it.

And so the cycle continues. Hunter is born, grows up, rebels, and is killed. Over and over and over again. Philip grows numb to it at this point – he’s already killed dozens of them, and he doesn’t see them as individuals anyway. To him, it’s like a game, resetting and starting over from the last checkpoint to really, really get everything right this time.

He adopts his new identity as Belos, and lets Hunter believe it too. He preaches to towns, pulls more and more power towards himself, with Hunter by his side, his Golden Guard, the most perfect version of Caleb he can make.

They keep betraying him though, so with each iteration, the leash gets tighter. The Hunters become more and more isolated, Belos’s power over them greater and greater. Step out of line and be beaten, show disrespect and be verbally abused, betray him (which can be anything from actively trying to stop his plans to making a friend he didn’t approve of) and be killed, replaced with another Grimwalker.

Belos becomes Emperor of the Isles, and his Grimwalkers become his right hand men, answering only to him. Caleb by his side, just like he’d always wanted. Never mind that the Grimwalkers are nothing like Caleb now – they’re submissive, desperate for affection and attention. They’re afraid of Belos, but cling to him all the same, because he’s all they have. He’s made sure of that.

A few years before the Day of Unity, the culmination of his life's work, Hunter betrays him again. Belos got too lenient, allowed him to take on a student, and now he’s got all sorts of weird ideas in his head again. So he starts over, and this time, he makes sure that Hunter will stay pure and obedient until the Day of Unity.

No contact with the other scouts. No scroll, no crystal ball, no leaving the castle unless it’s for a mission. Keep the number of missions to a minimum, make him associate getting missions with good behavior. Monitor his training, monitor what he studies, keep him safe under lock and key. Make him desperate to please, never quite give him what he needs so he keeps clinging to you for more.

And it works. For a while. At least, until literally a week before the Day of Unity, Hunter shows up in Philip’s mind. And I mean, Philip doesn’t necessarily want to ruin this one, but he’s always liked testing loyalty. He can make another Grimwalker after the Day of Unity if this one fails.

And fail Hunter does, except… he doesn’t die. He escapes. Goes on the run.

Philip tries to get him back, sends out search parties and everything, but Hunter doesn’t turn up, and he’s got other priorities now. It’s fine, Hunter’s got a sigil. He’ll die during the Day of Unity anyway.

And then he fucking shows up to stop him! Him, a gaggle of witch kids, and Luz the Human, and they nearly fight Philip to a standstill! They nearly get the better of him! Philip tries to guilt trip Hunter back to his side – surely he doesn’t want to hurt his beloved uncle – but then what does he see? That Fucking Bird. Caleb’s bird. This one’s DEFINITELY gone too far now, murder mode it is.

But then oops, the Collector gets freed, Philip gets splattered against a wall, and the Draining Spell ends. 

However, Phil’s not dead, somehow. He manages to shift his consciousness to one glob of goop that lands on Hunter, and rides along to the human realm, determined to salvage the dumpster fire this whole thing has become.

He gains back strength, spies on the kids, watches as Hunter does boring child stuff that’s absolutely nothing like how Caleb acted, until… Hunter finds a bit of his goop, and like a dumbass, sticks his finger into it. And Philip, who by now has gotten the hang of this whole Venom-stuff, crawls inside a wound, and into Hunter’s bloodstream.

And as he grows in strength, he realizes. This is it. This is the culmination of everything. Hunter isn’t Caleb, but dammit, he’s close enough. Philip can save him now, save him from these witches who have been a terrible influence on him, he can finally, finally complete his great work, with his brother by his side.

So when he gets strong enough, he takes over. Consumes whatever energy Hunter had stored in fat cells and his magic heart and uses it to power himself, growing himself throughout the kid’s whole body. Taking him over. 

He’s finally united with Caleb again, he can finally finish what he started. Never mind that Hunter doesn’t want this. Never mind that Hunter fucking hates him for what he did. Never mind that Hunter isn’t Caleb, never mind that Caleb would never, ever have wanted this, never mind that Philip is now the corrupting force, it does. Not. Matter. 

And then “Caleb” betrays him again. Because of fucking course he does. Philip literally fucking invaded his body like a parasite and made him kill his own Palisman with his bare hands, and he expected Hunter to just fucking lie down and take it? To let him do whatever? He robbed Hunter of his childhood, of his autonomy, of his personhood, and he expected the kid to not just accept it, but be grateful for it?

Well... Yeah. That’s how far gone he is. That’s how far removed from reality Philip has become. “Caleb” isn’t even a person to him anymore, “Caleb” is some kind of personification of his childhood nostalgia that he keeps trying to bring back into the flesh. And it’s not gonna work, because nobody could ever fill that role. Even the original Caleb wouldn’t be able to fill that role – in fact, that’s why Philip stuck a knife in his chest in the first place!

He’s lost EVERYTHING. He’s killed his own brother, he’s reduced himself to a parasitic goop monster that’s no longer living yet unable to die, the plan he’s spent 400 years working on blew up in his face, the realm he spent so long fighting for has moved on without him, and his latest attempt to create a new Caleb to comfort him not only rejected him, but actively despises him now. No fucking wonder he’s gone even more batshit insane.

I don’t know where the story is gonna go from here. Philip is still obviously trying to carry out his genocide, and Hunter is on the fucking war path now, so I have zero doubt that there’s going to be some sort of clash between those two. Hunter now also presumably has access to Flapjack’s memories, so him gaining memories of Caleb is also not out of the question. 

Either way, Philip’s just gonna become Even More Not Normal about his brother, and I for one cannot wait.