#he’s still my second favorite prosecutor so the joke’s on me

[festertheguineapig]

When you’re Japanese playing The Great Ace Attorney

[lungthief]

Just discovered your Klema situationship art I'm enthralled

eee thank you :') it means so much to me that people are enjoying it, their dynamic is my absolute favorite to write/draw and i adore them as characters

tbh it was one of those things that began as a joke and then made a lot of sense to me once i started actually thinking about it—like ema and klavier both strike me as the kind of people who are pretty cavalier about physical intimacy but very guarded when it comes to emotional intimacy, so yknow. having a coworkers-with-benefits relationship would come easily as a sort of begrudging “they’re hot and it’s convenient and i don’t have to worry about all the messy emotional stuff because we agreed we don’t want that” thing (and in klavier’s case he doesn’t have to worry abt ulterior motives or whatever bc ema straight up Does Not Give A Shit that he’s famous and dislikes him quite a bit at the beginning) and also like. they both could use some stress relief lbr

anyway i think it’d be really interesting to see these two people—one of whom wears a very flirty, outgoing facade and another who is outwardly very prickly and jaded—slowly realize that they both have a bit of a kindred loneliness about them and actually develop a friendship out of something that was intended to be entirely perfunctory. especially after the events of AJ i mean holy shit talk about bonding over Sibling Issues

for ema specifically i think there’s initially a lot resentment toward klavier in terms of his success (prosecutor at 17/got a famous defense attorney slash friend of hers disbarred/international rockstar) and her own perceived lack thereof (failing to become a forensic scientist) which kind of weirdly drives her to start the whole thing in the first place after klavier repeatedly indicates that he’s attracted to her—like “well he may have done all these impressive things but he still wants me desperately despite how openly inimical i’ve been to him so he’s not above me” which like. first of all girl go to therapy but second of all her perspective then can shift a lot over time when she gets to know him little by little and finds out that he also has a lot of horrific insecurities and considers himself kind of a fuck-up and is crumbling quite a bit under the weight of everything

also it is just like. inherently very funny. like you know they absolutely do not advertise this arrangement literally at all so any time anyone else finds out that they were sleeping together at one point it completely alters that person’s perception of reality

anyway all this to say love them love messy fucked up characters with messy fucked up baggage and intimacy issues sorry for writing a literal dissertation about this. I Care Them

[alynnl]

My (Unnecessary) Feelings about Miles Edgeworth: The Saga

Presented without context as I play the Ace Attorney trilogy for the first time. Spoilers ahead!

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney

Case 1-2: Miles Edgeworth makes his debut as a prosecutor with a winning record.  He’s arrogant and smug. I’m not sure if I like him when he’s clearly trying to get Maya and later Phoenix put in jail.  What do you mean, updated autopsy report?!  He’s corrupt as the summer days are long.  I don’t understand all the fanart featuring him.

Case1-3: I’m laughing.  His witnesses are giving him a hard time and I’m laughing.  Edgeworth takes major Ls in this case but he still puts up as much of a legal fight as possible.  He actually helps Nick this time around towards the end of the case, which was a surprise!  Maybe he’s not so bad after all. (And all the fan artists and fic writers have a point.)

Case 1-4: I immediately want to defend him.  Edgeworth is a lot of things but I didn’t want to believe he was a murderer. Knowing how cold hearted Manfred von Karma is, made me even more protective of him.  And what’s worse, Edgeworth wants to try and convict himself for his own living nightmare!  I was so relieved when he was found Not Guilty, both for the Gourd Lake case and DL-6. His smile group picture, his awkward but genuine thanks and his brief moment of cheering for the new year before hanging his head endeared him to me so much.  I cried tears of joy experiencing this scene.  He’s definitely my favorite without a shadow of a doubt!  I fully understand all the WrightWorth fanart, as well as the individual Miles Edgeworth art. He’s a fandom favorite for a reason!

Case 1-5 (first and second attempts): Despair, anguish, hopelessness. I cried sad tears, twice.  I want to defend him but I can’t. Politics are getting the better of him (and me too.)  I know actions aren’t free of consequences but the narrative seems to go out of its way to doom Edgeworth even though he’d just been saved.  He’s in his worst mood and outlook in this case.  Him taking the L is no longer a joke.

Case 1-5 (reprise, finale): A hope spot with a whole lot of angst.  The hope comes in that even though he’s put in a tight spot, Edgeworth still finds small ways to help Phoenix look for the truth, in and out of court.  He’s trying his best in a very grim situation!  He’s truly resilient.  But he’s not able to accept others reaching out to him (yet?)  He’s not able to grow (yet??)  Even though this case was added later and game 1 was supposed to end with case 1-4, it sure paints a clear picture as to what will happen in the second game when he goes missing.  It’s a rather sad picture.

Ace Attorney: Justice for All

Case 2-2: The first hint that he’s disappeared/he’s gone.  It’s Franziska von Karma we face off with in court (and if I remember right), Phoenix’s inner monologue makes it seem like Edgeworth died.  I refused to believe it because there is no evidence, of course!

Case 2-3, Investigation Day 1: Second hint that Edgeworth has disappeared/is gone.  Gumshoe confirms it.  He’s incredibly cagey about it, which is unlike our normally talkative detective.  The way it’s framed also implies character death, but there is still no evidence.  I have background knowledge that Edgeworth has not one, but two spin off games, more appearances in the first trilogy and a presence in the later trilogy as an NPC, so I know on a meta level he survived.  But from an early story perspective, I still have yet to figure out how he survived.  He has some major explaining to do!

More notes to be added, as I make more progress.

[alexiethymia]

snippet (res ipsa loquitur)

“Look who’s here. Professor Yang’s favorites!”

Professor Yang raises an eyebrow at that, as if to say that he didn’t have favorites, but Professor Kim Eun Sook pays him no mind. Dear friend though he may be, and though she would trust him with any case, his hard-ass act didn’t fool her. He could say whatever he wanted, but his subtle actions belied his fondness for his once-students turned professionals. Just the fact that he regularly invited them back to Hankuk to discuss cases was just one example.

“I don’t know about Prosecutor Han here, Professor Yang’s protégé that he is, but I’m certainly no favorite when I had to be Erica Shin just to get him to eat with me.” Lawyer Kang has certainly grown up to become a balanced professional, but Professor Kim is happy to see that she’s kept that refreshing bluntness of hers.

“If being Professor Yang’s favorite means additional work like getting called back to school, then I’d rather be your favorite.” Prosecutor Han for his part hasn’t changed much either. Although he’s settled into himself now, becoming as calm in actuality as he sometimes presented himself back in school, that teasing gaze towards Kang Sol A was still present how many years later.

Professor Yang just stares deadpan at what he deems to be nonsense from his former students. “I never taught the both of you to be lax as students, much less as professionals.”

“We’re just joking, Professor,” Kang Sol A – Lawyer Kang now – can easily look her once-savior in the eye and smile, as Professor Yang just raises an eyebrow, “You know we’re always glad to help with whatever we can.”

“We must have inherited your curse as a workaholic, Professor,” Prosecutor Han jokes. Even when he was just Han Joon Hwi, and not yet Prosecutor Han, he never had that fear towards Yangcrates. Frankly, he admired him, though it had always been a complicated emotion with the way all their fates had been tied.

“Ehem. Who would have thought that when I asked you to come hand-in-hand to my office so many years ago as students, you’d be doing it again and again now that you’ve become professionals.” Professor Kim is only half-serious. Even then she’d had an instinct about these two – one with the sharp mind and logic and the other with the fiery heart and passion. They would balance each other out, though she wouldn’t have picked up on it if not for Joon Hwi’s propensity to be a knight-in-shining armor for his then frazzled seatmate.

Kang Sol A mock-scoffs before smiling prettily, while sharing a gaze with an amused Joon Hwi. It was good to see that they still got along marvelously so many years later.

Professor Yang stares long and hard at them as if they were a crime scene he was investigating, before going on ahead and asking Joon Hwi to follow. Eun Sook’ll poke at his thoughts later though she’d be lucky if he felt like sharing them.

“See, you really are his favorite,” Kang Sol A nudges Joon Hwi playfully, while he only chuckles. “No need to worry Lawyer Kang. You’re my favorite at least.” Both Eun Sook’s eyebrows raise at that. With time and his new position, it seemed as if Joon Hwi had gotten more direct, if at all possible. Ah but perhaps, Eun Sook thinks while observing how Kang Sol A just laughs in response, rather than time it was circumstances that forced him to change his approach.

A slight movement behind Professor Kim’s desk catches all of their attention, and a doting smile appears on Eun Sook’s face.

“Aigoo. Is this your daughter Professor Kim?” Kang Sol positively beams at the small curly haired girl hiding shyly behind the Professor’s desk. She was so adorable! It reminded Sol of Byeol when she was at that age. Looking sideways, she sees Joon Hwi sporting an equally wide and fond smile. It was no wonder. With how he was with her younger sister, first when they’d met and until now, Kang Sol surmised that he must be ridiculously fond of children as well. Distantly she thinks that he’d be a wonderful father someday, although uncharacteristically cynical, she also has to admit that she doesn’t exactly have any good bases for comparisons.

“Yes,” Professor Kim says, proud, like all mothers are, “Say hi to oppa and unnie here. They work with the law just like mommy.”

Funnily, it’s a race between them for the privilege of lifting Professor Kim’s daughter up in their arms, but Joon Hwi lets her win (much like he always does). Kang Sol A openly cooes, while Joon Hwi hovers closely to the both of them, also introducing himself to the young girl.

It’s such a heartwarming sight that Professor Kim almost wants to take a picture of it, even if it would be inadmissible as evidence later on.

They’re momentarily interrupted when someone enters the legal clinic.

“Ah Miss, it’s so wonderful to see you again.”

“Ahjumma!” Kang Sol exclaims happily upon seeing the lady who ran the Bad FaMa website enter the legal clinic. Seamlessly, she adjusts Professor Kim’s daughter on her hip, before transferring her to Joon Hwi who carries her on his arm. “How are you? What are you doing here? It’s not another defamation case is it,” Kang Sol asks worriedly. Of course, she’d defend her properly this time since she was now a full-fledged lawyer, not only giving half-baked assistance and having to rely on Joon Hwi because she wasn’t prepared yet.

“Ah no, no need to worry Miss – ah my mistake, it’s Lawyer Kang now isn’t it? You sure showed them didn’t you.” She smiles warmly, proudly, at Kang Sol, and Kang Sol gets happy flutters in her heart and stomach, “I volunteer here at the legal clinic sometimes. Professor Kim has been helping me out with lobbying for stricter child support laws, and the other lawyer who volunteers here - Lawyer Jeon - has been helping me with cases of single mothers. She’s been telling me all about you. I’m really glad to see you doing so well.” Though it’s been a while since Kang Sol has seen her – since when she was still a law student in fact – the older woman and that case will always hold a special place in her heart. She considers it as her first case, and though it did cause a slight rift between her and Joon Hwi, she had been the first person outside of smug Second Judicial Exam Passers and terrifying law professors who had genuinely thanked her for the legal service she provided. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that Kang Sol owes a lot to her for reigniting her reason for studying law in the first place.

“And Prosecutor Han, I’m delighted to see you’re doing great as well.” Joon Hwi inclines his head at her while responding in kind. Even with a child on his arm, he looks every bit the respectable Prosecutor, and Kang Sol could sometimes shake her head in amused resignation at how flawless her – (Friend? Best friend? Family?), - at how flawless Joon Hwi is. She shakes her head for a different reason this time around, to get rid of that brief interruption in her mind.

Ahjumma smiles, full of maternal care. “What a lovely daughter,” Joon Hwi and Kang Sol exchange wordless glances and smiles, fully agreeing with her assessment – Professor Kim’s daughter with her soft curls, and shy and polite demeanor really was just too cute for words, “the both of you two have,” – before freezing in their tracks.  

Ajhumma seems not to notice the slight disturbance in the force, nor Professor Kim’s silent but far from inconspicuous chuckles, since she goes on, “Perhaps I’m just biased, but I’d always thought that the both of you suited each other well, even back then. And to see the both of you with a daughter of your own makes me really happy. We have enough parents who abandon their kids, but I know you would be such loving parents who would do everything and anything in your power to protect your daughter.” She grasps Kang Sol’s hands in her own and says sincerely, “Congratulations to the both of you.”

Prosecutor Han for all of his brilliance in court seems for the first time at a loss for words. It was a misunderstanding yes, but a reasonable one in Eun Sook’s mind. She would have probably thought the same, and yet for all that Eun Sook imagines they’ll just brush this off and regain their easy momentum, the pause lasts far too long this time around, and Professor Kim suddenly worries.

Kang Sol is frozen, and looks to be a million miles away. It’s to the point that the woman grasping her hands finds her smile slowly falling. There are no flustered denials, nor a hint of red anywhere. Kang Sol is blank, and this worries Professor Kim since the younger girl has always been full of life, of emotion, and to see this is disconcerting. Joon Hwi sees her from the corner of his eye, and Professor Kim is suddenly transported back to that Civil Code classroom so many years ago, for he once again saves her from having to answer, as always reliably following-up after her.

He slowly lowers her daughter down who immediately rushes to her. Upon seeing that, realization breaks across their guest’s face. “She’s not our daughter, but Professor Kim’s,” he explains smoothly, although it may be a bit redundant now. That seems to snap Kang Sol from the daze she’s in as she energetically reassures their guest that there was no need to worry regarding the misunderstanding. 

Eun Sook picks up her daughter and sends a questioning gaze towards Joon Hwi who seems reluctant to meet it. He smiles that characteristic smile of his, the one that seemed to say that he had everything under control, that there was nothing that could trip him, before politely excusing himself from the room to follow after Professor Yang. “He must be tired of waiting.” He doesn’t rush, nor does he run. Both his voice and gait are measured and paced, and though he catches Kang Sol A’s eye in that form of wordless communication that Professor Kim observed was common to him, her, and even Professor Yang, Kang Sol A seems to break it first to rejoin her conversation with their guest and her.

Joon Hwi stares a little longer at her profile before exiting.

The warm atmosphere the legal clinic had when the two had entered earlier seems to have dissipated.

Professor Kim really cannot help but worry.

[1ddotdhq]

🏴‍☠️Sat 31 Oct ‘20🎃

Harry is sending out 150 Golden postcards (they appear to be numbered out of a batch of 150) from the Golden website! They all have the Amalfi Coast on the front, “You’re so Golden” written on them, and are signed, “ <3 HARRY”. Look, I thought that LOUIS had trouble with hearts, but Harry’s are, uh, somehow worse. It’s been gleefully pointed out that fans have been selling postcards for Harry’s singles for the last few months, and that Harry once again seems to be looking to us for promo ideas! Hey, if it works, it works, and if Harry wants to send me a postcard I’d LOVE it hahaha. Niall is taking a page out of Liam’s book and is rehearsing his show - which is in ONE WEEK (!) - and his band members continue to post pictures of their rehearsals. Love that! But lest you think it's a slow news day aside from Liam NO-- Zayn posted his annual halloween look!! A zelfie!!! Less elaborate than past years, maybe he's not getting enough sleep for some reason, but amazing (amazayn) nonetheless: he's angled downwards, pulling a funny face, with his freshly buzzed hair, earrings, and a Slytherin tie over a white shirt captioned, “Happy Halloween from Slytherin”. Liam’s chat when the picture dropped: “Zayn have you SLITHERED IN HERE???” Hope he enjoyed Tom and Liam's show...

And on to the main event: Liam has DONE IT AGAIN!! Despite some wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff with the event time (it started one hour and ten minutes later than planned), once Liam got started, nobody could drag him down! Lola Young, Carly Gibert, and Tom Felton were all charming openers, and, because of their very different styles, they all brought something new to the table. Then Liam, broadcasting from the London Dungeons (a spooky tourist attraction), started the show trapped in a cage (so HE’S the cage dancer this time!). The songs he chose from his own discography were ghoulish and grim and surrounding the topic of, uh, life and death. It did seem to be intentional, though, as this all led up to a moment when a masked guard led Liam out of the concert and into a bloody tribunal, where they accused him of “crimes against fashion” and “being a bad bandmate”. They had fans on zoom playing the prosecutor and defense. He was acquitted of the first crime after a fierce defense from a fan, but after a long list of joking accusations of him being mean to the other boys (it felt uncomfortably like a normal day on twitter, but Liam says no fighting about it!), the prosecutor convicted him (was I outraged?? YES! I WAS!), and the sentence was DEATH. Liam then did a bit of a costume change: he went from Jack Sparrow to ZOMBIE PIRATE, ie added some uncomfortable contacts ("guys I can't see anything").Then he came back to finish his set with Billie Eilish and 5SOS covers, and SEVERAL One Direction songs: Live While We're Young, Drag Me Down, One Thing, What A Feeling (can you believe this is only the SECOND TIME a member of 1D has performed it live? AMAZING!), and a cool personalized version of Midnight Memories (“the opening number has now become the closing number”).

And then the Afterparty!! Liam, as promised, involved MUA Abby Roberts in picking his Halloween makeup looks, the winner being a fantastically scary writing of “Liam Payne” on a fan’s face that was made to look like mottled scar tissue - UGH what an INCREDIBLE look! He also pulled up his “accusers” on zoom, told fans that it was all in good fun and to not send any hate, and admitted that he also felt bad for pantsing Harry. But, he insisted, it’s not his fault! Louis dared him to do it! And, as everyone knows, no one in that band was allowed to back down from a dare. Abby Roberts admitted to being a 1D fan - she even visited some popups! - and videographer Conor also spilled that he first met Liam at a 1D meet and greet. Liam thought this was the best thing, and reminisced about being at the very dungeon he was in ten years prior for Halloween with the (then brand new and still on the X Factor) band. A crew member then managed to scare up (heh) a picture, which was sweet and nostalgic, which was true of a lot of the show! Personally, this has been my favorite LP Show, and Liam has really raised the bar for what online shows can and should be.

Of course, like with all good parties, there was an AFTER afterparty, where he spilled some more tea! He streamed live on Tik Tok - is it time for me to concede and get a Tik Tok??? Sigh, the things I do for these boys. In his after afterparty, he answered some more questions about himself and the boys. He said he was glad to have done a show on the anniversary of the last One Direction show (sad), that he wrote several songs with Louis that have not been released, notable HideAway and even sung a bit of it: “Something in the way she moves...we just have to hide away”. He also said that he saw Harry last year at the Jingle Ball and that he had a slight American accent (“he said ‘AHND’ that way”), that his phone bill would be huge if he called Louis right now (hmmmmm), and that even if he DID call to prank him, Louis would just swear anyways, which was not what they were going for. Awwww, friendship!

[viridiave]

NARUMITSU <ATTEMPTING TO READ THE SUBTEXT PLATONICALLY>

*Wrote all this some time last month so I might be off- really really off- also full disclosure I too am a Narumitsu shipper- this is just me giving myself a bad time doing the impossible and having fun XD

-I am going to fail sooner or later. Looking at you, Bridge to the Turnabout.

FIRST GAME >Turnabout Samurai -Yep. We're jumping right in with 'unnecessary feelings'. I'm going to be put on a stake for this. -This is going to become the main argument with any and all homoerotic subtext present in the first game- that it was unintentional. They didn't actively start making it gay until the second game, and even before then the producer for the games had to warn the development team not to try and insert these themes for fear of getting it wrong and lose the fanbase they'd accidentally caught the eye of. I can still create arguments for why this specific, hilariously meme-able line could be read romantically of course- but as far as the game development team at the time was concerned this interaction was never meant to be read as romantic. -Unease and uncertainty are... very valid feelings for Edgeworth to feel at this very moment and as much as I'd like to joke that he was feeling uncertain about his sexuality after seeing his childhood friend as an adult, this line was really just likely meant to lead up to the conclusion of Turnabout Goodbyes and Edgeworth's character arc for this game. His perfect win streak had just been shattered in a case prior. In this case, he was meant to persecute the lead actor of his favorite show- and in some ways his helping the defense can be taken as his biases getting the better of him. His sense of justice and his entire worldview is about to be overhauled, and I can see how he would regard this budding doubt in himself as an unnecessary (heh) distraction from what he believes is his true purpose in life.

>Turnabout Goodbyes -Edgeworth wanting to keep him away from DL-6 has its own section mostly because of how stubborn he becomes when it comes to Phoenix's insistence in particular. It's clear that this stubbornness is a front, I will concede with that- but there are merits to his initial reluctance in accepting Phoenix's defense. It's evident that Phoenix himself has grown over the course of the game so far, but in both of the times that he faced off against Edgeworth in court, his victories were... a tad bit contrived. For instance in Turnabout Sisters, Phoenix really only wins because Mia was being channeled and blackmailed White as he was about to leave the stand. Turnabout Samurai is a little better- but had him rely on quite a lot of coincidences (proven later to be substantiated) that surfaced during the trial. This is nothing to say of the deeper reason Edgeworth has over dissuading Phoenix from taking his case ("You in particular I cannot ask to do this.")- where I can make an argument for his pride and/or concern over Phoenix's career as an attorney. The stakes are relatively high here as well- if Phoenix fails, Edgeworth is incarcerated, Manfred von Karma goes free, DL-6 goes cold once again with no hope of getting re-opened, and everything that Phoenix has been working towards as an attorney would have been in vain. DL-6 is a case that has ruined many lives- it'd make sense if Edgeworth himself felt as though it would be a waste of time and effort to take this case because of how convinced he was of murdering his own father prior to Gourd Lake. He'd grown up for the past 15 years with a nightmare and a death sentence over his head- I wouldn't be surprised if he simply gave up and accepted that he was going to die at the hands of his prosecuting mentor. Even if he were acquitted for the murder of Robert Hammond, his perceived involvement in DL-6 would have thrown a wrench in his freedom- any lesser attorney would have given up on that. And this is unloaded BEFORE Phoenix tells him about the true reason as to why he became an attorney. -Phoenix's insistence to defend Edgeworth in this case can easily just be read as platonic- his complete, unfettered faith in Edgeworth's innocence is heavily influenced by that class trial, for better or for worse. While I'm perfectly happy to imagine that Phoenix's attachment to his idealized version of Edgeworth grew into something deeper sometime in the fifteen years that he hasn't seen him, I do believe that Phoenix in particular really is just that much of a sentimental person. This is to say nothing of his nature as a defense attorney- and what little time he's managed to spend with Mia has taught him that unbridled trust in his client is what gets him through the day, and he's putting it to practice here. Edgeworth was what he has been working towards the moment he decided he would practice law- as Phoenix at this point in time still believes that he could do no wrong despite seeing what Edgeworth is truly like in court. -Cutting into the meat of Phoenix and Edgeworth's shared past, I made a point earlier to say that Phoenix's perception of Edgeworth as a person is idealized. Every memory that Phoenix has had of Edgeworth prior to the events of the first game were from their childhood- and they had 4-8 months (plus one year if we're generous with the retconning some of the official art gave us) MAX to develop a friendship so strong that Phoenix makes major life decisions just to meet with this man. The fact that this time spent together was ENOUGH for Phoenix in the first place is... really hard to skirt around. To quote Dan from GameGrumps "this is something that you would only do for someone you're trying to marry" and if one of them was a woman I guarantee this ship would be canon already. But then again- since this is Phoenix Wright in particular somehow I can believe that he really is just that sentimental- and that isn't always a bad thing. He'd managed to save Edgeworth twice with this conviction after all. When Phoenix sees Edgeworth, he doesn't see a demon prosecutor, he sees his childhood friend who aimed to become a shining example of justice following in his father's footsteps. They address how shaky his foundations for becoming an attorney were in the Phoenix Wright Files once actually- going through a mini-existential crisis because he'd become an attorney with the main goal of saving Edgeworth from what he'd become, and now that he's accomplished that he's just kind of... lost. Edgeworth himself manages to pull him out of this, though. -man that hurts my case a lot actually but to be fair I was banking on failing -I just didn't expect it to happen so early even with the first game -in fact ESPECIALLY with the first game -though I cannot for the life of me wonder how I can come up with a heterosexual explanation for why the buildup towards Edgeworth telling Phoenix and Maya about his nightmares reads so much like a stunted love confession. I'm serious- just read any high school shojo manga ever. You'll find that it hits a lot of the same beats.

>Rise From The Ashes -It's in this case that we observe some of the consequences that the intial upheaval of Edgeworth's worldview in Turnabout Goodbyes causes him; distrust in the enforcement of the law. Not exactly the time for him to be dabbling in another, meme-able brand of unnecessary feelings. Several things like the Prosecutor's Office's relationship with the Police Department starts to waver with the murder of Bruce Goodman, and this becomes the final nail in the coffin for Edgeworth's worldviews and values as a prosecutor. His and Phoenix's teamwork in this trial becomes prevalent- the story behind the King of Prosecutors award represents this best despite it's currently incomplete state. The backstory behind this award paints an ideal of justice in the courtroom wherein the truth comes out as a result of the efforts of contradictory forces. A broken halberd that can cut through any shield (the prosecution) and a broken, unbreakable shield (the defense). Read as representation the text becomes something of a metaphor for the ideal justice that manifests itself in the best parts of Edgeworth and Phoenix respectively- the duality of their opposing professions rather than something that is limited to their relationship. -The same argument that I've used for Phoenix's unwavering belief in Edgeworth's innocence in Turnabout Goodbyes can be used for this case as well. -Though Edgeworth still goes M.I.A for a year after this case, it does grant his disappearance a bit more context as to why exactly it is that he left- and I'll be taking a tiny liberty with this and apply the interpretation that the Miles Edgeworth Files grants us, and that he left in order to better himself and grow as a person, a prosecutor, and as a friend to Phoenix Wright. It's... difficult for me to want to read this as anything but romantically-charged because the narrative beats are NOT lost on me (the dialogue makes this especially hard. send help.)- there's a possibility that Edgeworth at this point in time realizes the value in having a better, more functional dynamic with the one defense attorney who he considers a true equal in court. This dynamic will allow for less chances to encounter missteps and errors in any verdicts handed down in court, and if Edgeworth is to pursue his ideal of justice- Phoenix Wright is undoubtedly essential to this endeavor. The aftermath of Rise From The Ashes is indicative of this newfound goal of his- the symbolism behind the old King of Prosecutors award and the two halves of the evidence list certainly helps this case. -<"It seems all you do is worry about me." -Miles Edgeworth, Rise From The Ashes> For good fucking reason Edgeworth. You were accused of murder and have implicated yourself on the stand for DL-6 just a few months ago- and if the Investigations games are anything to go by, you're more of a danger magnet than PHOENIX is. I had to say it. The first Investigations game takes place over the course of 2-3 days and the sheer amount of shit that Edgeworth had to deal with in between that interval truly makes me wonder how Phoenix Wright ended up with the title of danger magnet. And THIS time- Edgeworth's car becomes a crime scene because his corrupt superiors needed a convenient way of transporting a corpse. There's VERY good reasons to worry about the livelihood of Miles Edgeworth. -Okay I... can't believe I forgot about the chessboard. Here's the kicker- the one we see from his office isn't even the only one he owns. I... legitimately cannot give you ANY purely heterosexual, platonic explanation for why Miles Edgeworth has THREE (THREE. I CANNOT OVERSTATE THIS. HE HAS T H R E E OF THESE FUCKING THINGS. GOOD GOD. HE CAN'T BE ANY MORE EXTRA.)(there exists a similar, portable set in the Investigations games- and he has a new set by the time of Dual Destinies) sets of custom-made chessboards with personalized, highly-specific red and blue designs made purely to depict his rivalry with Phoenix Wright. I fold. I give up. I forgot about the chessboards I wAS NOT EXPECTING TO FAIL THIS E A R LY- -You know what the real kicker is with Rise From the Ashes? The main argument that I have introduced back in Turnabout Samurai does not apply here. Rise From the Ashes was made as a DS-exclusive case and did not exist in the original GameBoy version of the Trilogy. Which means if there is homoerotic tension written in for this case (and there happens to be a lot. the chessboard is proof enough.), then we can safely assume that the writers at this point were well-aware. So yeah- maybe don't feel TOO bad about the unnecessary feelings line- because ever since then the writers have been playing off of that and it SHOWS. -Is there really a point to this I'm just- everything is stacked against me tryna interpret this platonically -Like I know I make a point to say that a romantic relationship isn't the end-all of all relationships because this franchise LOVES pushing the Found Family dynamic and I'm an absolute sucker for that -good god by the time Dual Destinies rolls around I'll probably just give up and happily say they're happily married -that's literally what they act like don't even pretend

[vannahfanfics]

A Dash of Cream and Sugar

Category: Mild Romantic Fluff

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Characters: Emi Fukukado, Shota Aizawa

Emi hunched over the counter, fist digging into her cheek with her lips pursed as she sourly fixated on the corner of the coffeeshop. Bent over a laptop, fingers smoothly gliding over the keyboard, the handsomest man she’d ever clapped eyes on diligently attended to his work. Onyx-black eyes lidded as they fixed on the computer screen, wavy brown-black hair tied in a loose bun behind his head, and a white dress shirt clinging to his lean but muscular frame, local prosecutor Shota Aizawa sure was a mouthwatering sight— and a frequent one. The man practically lived on coffee, and thus was a regular figure in the mom-and-pop coffee shop where Emi worked as a barista. 

He’s so attractive that it’s a crime, she moped, slumping further into the counter as her longing mounted. She released a dreamy sigh, hearts practically beating in her eyes while she watched him take a languid sip of his black coffee. How can he walk around looking that fine when he’s a prosecutor? Talk about hypocritical! She giggled at her own joke, drawing the attention of her coworker Yu. 

“Ahhh, daydreaming about life with our local sleep-deprived filthy rich prosecutor, are we, Emi?” the blonde woman crooned as she bopped Emi atop the head with an empty coffee cup. The other woman frowned and rubbed the top of her hair, turning to look at her friend with pursed lips. 

“Not so loud!” 

“Relax. The only one who’s unaware of your affections is the object of your affections,” Yu teased. Emi puffed out her cheeks angrily, but said nothing, because she was right. Despite Emi’s most valiant attempts at flirting— batting her eyelashes, fleeting touches, and even bending over the counter to give a great shot of her endowments— had failed miserably. The man was just oblivious. Stone-faced, he’d just take his coffee with a simple “thank you” and shamble off to his corner to attend to his paperwork. 

Emi was at the end of her rope. She wasn’t getting any younger, and dammit, she wanted this man. 

“What do I do, Yu?” she warbled miserably while turning to plank against Yu’s chest. The woman cooed and patted Emi’s back encouragingly, prompting the green-hand woman to seek further solace in her bosom. Buried in her pillowy chest, Emi’s words were muffled as she groaned, “I just want him to notice me…” 

“Alas, my dear Emi, men are dense sometimes,” Yu tutted and patted Emi atop her head. “However, we women must persevere to win the hearts of men, however blockheaded they may be! It’s clear we have to take drastic measures.” 

“Drastic measures?” Emi echoed, turning up her chin to peer at Yu with pursed lips and a few of her sea-green hair sticking up from her friend’s comforting caresses. 

“That’s right!” Yu asserted and clapped her hands down on Emi’s shoulders, making her jump a little. “You have to lay it on so thick that he can’t possibly think you’re doing anything but flirting. Listen carefully, dear Emi, and we’ll net your man for sure!” Emi straightened up and Yu leaned in close to whisper fervently in her ear, both their gazes flickering to the unsuspecting man sitting quietly in his corner and type-type-typing away… 

That’s how Emi found herself sauntering up to the small round table with a fresh coffee in hand, an exaggerated sashay in her hips and a pleasant smile on her freshly-glossed lips (courtesy of her savior Yu). She called cheerily to Shota, adding a delighted wave to play up the cute and endearing act, and her heart skipped a beat when his lidded black eyes slid in her direction. His eyebrows quirked up his forehead when he noticed the steaming cup of coffee in her hand, her seafoam green acrylic nails a stark contrast to the white paper cup. 

“What do we have here?” he smirked, straightening in his chair. Emi’s knees nearly turned to jelly when he stretched his arms above his head, part of his dress shirt coming untucked from the waistband of his slate gray slacks and revealing a bit of his chiseled abdominals. She wobbled in her heels, legs stumbling in front of each other, but thankfully he had his eyes closed as he popped his aching vertebrae. It gave her just enough time to stagger up to the table and catch herself with the edge— and greet him with a million-dollar smile when he cracked his eyes open. 

“You’ve been here for a while, hard at work,” she explained, setting the fresh coffee down. “I thought it was high time for a fresh cup.” 

“Much appreciated, Emi.” Her nerves sang as he used her name, just like every time; with how often he was here, he was on a first-name basis with all the baristas, especially Emi since she worked full-time to supplement her income as a part-time standup comedian. He took the cup and brought it to his lips, sampling it with a teasingly raised eyebrow. He then smiled at her, and she wanted to do a happy somersault when she saw the pleased twinkle in his onyx eyes. “Perfect. I would be disappointed if you didn’t have my order memorized.” 

“The strongest brew of the day with a dash of cream and sugar and an extra two shots of espresso, or as I like to call it, Liquid Death,” Emi joked with a waggle of her finger. “Of course I know it, since I make it almost every day.” Her heart thrummed when his smirk twitched into an amused smile. 

“And yet, it’s not on the menu.”

“The management believes that it may unnerve our normal customers,” Emi purred with a playful wink. A chuckle rumbled in his chest, throaty in deep, and she melted against the table as her knees once again melted at the devilish attractiveness of this man. I’ll die before I even get to ask him out! She thought, resisting the urge to fan her slowly-flushing face. 

“What a shame,” he tutted and took another sip. Emi watched him with an intense stare— more specifically, the writing in permanent marker on the cup he’d yet to notice, as it was currently hidden underneath his thumb. Would her and Yu’s carefully-constructed plan fall to pieces all due to unfortunate physics? Her heart pounded against his ribcage as she just watched him sip at the coffee, her brows furrowing more and more with each passing second. 

Please notice me… I’m right here! she pleaded silently, nearly reduced to tears with frustration. Her heartbeat rose in pitch with each thump, until it thundered in her ears at near-deafening intensity. 

“Emi? Emi. Emi.” 

“O-oh!” she stammered when Shota’s voice finally reached her. She jerked violently and fluttered her eyelashes as she came back to reality; it took her a few moments to register that he was holding out some bills to her and looking at her in concern. 

“You all right?” 

“H-huh! Oh, yes. I just got lost in thought!” she evaded with a light-hearted laugh. She looked down at the offered bills, then waved a hand dismissively with a smile. “Oh, don’t worry about the coffee! I used my daily free drink.” 

Shota raised an eyebrow questioningly, his hand falling a little. 

“Well, that leaves you without a drink, now doesn’t it?” 

“Bahhh, don’t sweat it!” she insisted with another fluttery wave, using her other hand to rub the back of her neck. “I don’t feel like drinking coffee today.” Shota looked unconvinced, but obediently tucked the bills back into his wallet. He picked up the coffee and sipped at it thoughtfully, once again failing to see the writing scrawled on the white surface. Emi wanted to fall over and throw a tantrum, it was so infuriating how the world hated her so!

“Still, I feel like I should repay you some way…” 

“Really, it’s not ne—” 

“If not monetary reimbursement, then perhaps a date?” 

Emi almost spit all over him with the completely flabbergasted sound that came out of her mouth. Shota actually chuckled a little at the way her mouth fell open and she just stared unresponsively, dumbstruck. 

“While you were staring off into space, I read your little love note,” he revealed, turning the coffee cup around and giving it a shake. Emi had written the poem “Roses are red, violets are blue, if it’s not too much trouble, can I go out with you? <3” in black permanent marker in the white space of the cup. “Quite original, I must say. Much more enjoyable than your phone number, though I suppose I’ll need it,” he said with a wolfish grin and a saucy wink that had Emi almost faint. 

“O-okay,” she said breathily, submitting to the urge to fan her face as a blush blazed across her face. She retrieved her trusty permanent marker and the empty coffee cup, lifting it up with trembling hands to write down her number. Her quivering hands made the numbers jerky and twitchy, but thankfully still legible. When she handed it back to Shota, he appraised it with a hum, and then set it down. 

“Thank you. What time do you get off tonight?” 

“T-tonight?” she wheezed. Though this was everything she’d ever wanted, suddenly it felt like it was all happening too fast. Somehow, she remained steadfast and squeaked out, “Ei-eight…” 

“All right then, Emi,” Shota smiled and leaned back in his chair. “I’ll see you for dinner, then. Now, you and I both should probably get back to work,” he said, motioning to the coffee bar with his chin. She looked back to see Yu struggling to man the front herself and casting desperate glances at Emi. 

“O-okay!” she said breezily, wobbling as the situation finally began to dawn on her. Still, her friend needed her, so she staggered back to her workspace to replace Yu at the register and fumble through the orders with a hazy mind. She kept thinking how much Shota’s coffee order fit him— though he seemed dark and brooding, just like pure espresso, but there was a hint of sweetness, a dash of cream and sugar, swirling within. She couldn’t wait until their date, when she could really get a taste of her new favorite brew…

Enjoy this oneshot? Feel free to peruse my Table of Contents!

[detectivesvu]

Another Round

—

Rafael Barba x Fem. Reader

Warnings: None.

Word Count: 2,454

“Moral of the story, take a chance in life. You never know what might happen.”

—

The bar was rather uninhabited compared to usual. Even for a Wednesday night the crowd was scarce and things were quiet. The smell of liquor and bodily fragrances wasn’t as thick in the air as it normally was. There were a few patrons seated at the various booths around the establishment. Most of them were office coworkers attempting to blow off some steam to ensure that they could push through to Friday where they could look forward to a couple of days off before having to prepare to do it all again the next week. 

There were only two customers actually sitting at the bar. One was an older woman that you had the pleasure of seeing every Wednesday evening for about an hour or two. She was a lovely lady who worked in accounting at a private establishment. She had actually found the bar you bartended at by accident. She had been caught in a torrential downpour and ducked into the nearest building to let the rain pass. That building just so happened to be your little bar that you offered as a temporary home to those who needed it. You convinced her to at least stick around for a drink, to which she ordered a dry martini. Ever since that day, she now came every week. She was convinced that you made the best dry martini (with extra olives) in the whole city. In a general sense, she was great company and an even better tipper.

“Wonderful as usual, [Y/N],” She called to you from the opposite side of the bar; “I’ll see you next time!”

She tapped the money she had left on the bar to make sure that you noted to take your tip. You flashed her your warmest and most genuine smile, waving at her once she made it to the door;

“Thanks, see you later!” You called back. 

Once she left, you were sure to clean off the bar where she sat, taking your tip, and setting her empty martini glass aside to be washed after hours. That left the only other person sitting at the bar. You had seen him about three times over the last few weeks and not once had he seemed interested in conversing with you. You had impeccable customer service as well as having a talent for reading people. You knew nothing about him, not even his name. However, you knew that whatever he did for a living was a killer on his mental health and overall being. Every time he had come in during your shift, he looked like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. He would sit in the same seat and very quietly order his usual drink of choice: a glass of scotch served straight. 

He usually would nurse his first drink for a little while before eventually loosening his tie and pulling some sort of work out of his bag. You were never nosy enough to try and figure out what it was, but it seemed to be important based off of the way he usually never took his eyes off of it. Most people would just look at him as being busy, but you looked deeper and identified that he was lonely. 

You knew that some people weren’t as talkative as others. There was a portion of bar-goers that would rather order their drink and not say a single word the entire time. As a bartender, you craved to talk to those people to give your best job performance. As a good hearted human being, you craved to talk to those people because you knew that they desperately needed to. You wanted to be a listening ear to anyone who needed it. No questions asked or judgements given.

You had a rag in one hand and a highball glass in the other as you gently stood in front of the man. He was extremely focused in on whatever he was working on, so you softly spoke to get his attention and not break his stride;

“Can I get you another scotch, sir?” You asked.

A little startled, his head snapped up and his eyes trained on you. He processed your question before sighing and rubbing his forehead stressfully. He leaned back into his chair and set his shiny pen down next to his papers. Poor guy. He was beat.

“Yes, please.” He replied simply.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” You apologized sincerely, but with a slight smile. 

You turned to the array of bottles behind you, selecting the same bottle of scotch you had served him before. He chuckled at your statement and exhaled deeply;

“No, no. Don’t be sorry. I got a little lost there for a minute.” He said briefly motioning towards his work. 

You refilled his glass, returned the bottle to its proper place, and leaned forward against the bar just a little ways off to the side as he began to sip his second drink of the night. 

“I can see that. You always seem to bring work to the place where work is supposed to be left behind.” You astutely noted.

He shrugged and cocked his head to the side shortly;

“You’re observant. I like that.” He responded rather coyly. 

Now it was your turn to shrug;

“It’s in the job description,” You joked; “This might make me a bad bartender, but I’ve seen you in here more than once and never caught your name.” 

He smiled tenderly. It was now that you realized just how charming he was when he wasn’t tied down to his paperwork. 

“Rafael Barba. You’re [Y/N], right?” He introduced himself.

You nodded, but your head was hard at work. That name sounded so familiar. Where had you heard that name? Surely you hadn’t ever met him outside of work. Then it hit you.

“Barba...oh, you’re the prosecutor on the Lindsey Darien case!” You announced.

His smile changed into a surprised expression;

“I am. Not many people remember my name,” He admitted; “Usually I’m just the lawyer that people happened to catch on the morning news.”

You laughed gingerly at that. You couldn’t even imagine being a criminal prosecutor. It all made sense now. The late night arrival at the bar, the tense posture, the constant attention being on his work. He might as well have the weight of the world on him. It was no wonder he always looks so uptight. You couldn’t comprehend the things he probably saw everyday. The stories he had to hear on the regular would keep you up at night for weeks. You were just fine slinging bottles and cleaning up crushed pretzels off of the floor. 

“That case is...an intense one, yeah?” You questioned, being careful not to pry.

He shot you a look that read ‘finally someone gets it’ and ‘you don’t even know the half of it’. You knew he couldn’t tell you any specifics and honestly you didn’t want to know. Again, you were behind a bar for a reason. You weren’t cut out for that kind of work. 

“To say the least. One of the hardest of my career.” He confessed, finishing off his drink.

You wondered if there was anyone outside of work that he was able to talk to about his job. You hoped he wasn’t confined to only speaking to people involved with the cases he dealt with. That was a lot of bottled up feelings to carry around all the time. 

“Well, in that case,” You proclaimed; “The next one’s on me.”

You refilled his glass once more, knowing this would be his last one for the night. He never drank more than three. He thanked you and proposed a new topic, wanting to continue speaking with you. He was beginning to find himself intrigued by you. He had met lots of bartenders in his life, but none of them seemed to have the same kind of energy that you did. He found it refreshing.

“What about you? I bet you’ve got some stories.” He remarked.

Oh, you definitely had stories. You learned very quickly that bartending was going to allow you to see the absolute best and worst of people. In a weird way, that’s what made your job so beautiful to you. It was a relief to know that it was okay to not be your best all the time.

“Sure I do. All bartenders do,” You agreed; “Are you asking for the craziest, funniest, or scariest thing I’ve ever encountered, counselor?”

He groaned with a modest guttural sound;

“Please. Call me Rafael. I don’t need my favorite bartender calling me by my job title too,” He said with a smirk; “But how about your favorite story?”

You felt your cheeks get hot at his nonchalant compliment. Many of your regulars were adamant about you being their preferred bar technician, but for some reason it felt different coming from Rafael. Something strange was brewing inside you and you could feel it in your chest...almost like a weird flutter. He was feeling it too, but he brushed it off as the alcohol settling in. 

“My favorite story...” You repeated; “Well, I do have one in particular.” You declared.

He was very tuned in now. He was not the same man you had just been in contact with when he first walked in. 

“I’ve been at this bar for a long time. Like, almost 15 years. I’ve had a lot of regulars come and go,” You began; “I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve forgotten a good many of them. But there’s this one guy that I’ll never forget.”

Rafael was watching you from over the rim of his glass, sipping slowly to savor his drink. He wasn’t sure where this was going yet.

“He came in every week when I was working and each time he looked more defeated than the last. After he had been coming for awhile, I finally asked him what was going on in his life,” You recalled; “It turned out that there was this woman that he had been friends with since elementary school. He was head over heels for her and always had been.”

You smiled brightly as you continued telling the story. It still gave you chills to this day;

“He was worried because he didn’t want her to reject him. He didn’t want to ruin their friendship. They were both getting close to their forties and he had convinced himself it was too late to get married and start a family. On top of that, he was scared that if they did get together then he’d always regret the times they could’ve had together but didn’t because he waited too long,” You told; “I told him that there was a reason she was still in his life. There was a reason that she never committed to anybody else. They had been tip-toeing around one another for decades. I knew they were meant to be together.”

Rafael was an extremely good listener. He wasn’t one to overly enjoy cheesy romantic stories, but this one was awfully captivating. For the first time in weeks, he wasn’t thinking about work.

“We talked for a long time, up until closing time. I convinced him to go for it. I told him that it wasn’t worth never taking his chance and then always wondering what could’ve been. The next time I saw him, he had a woman with him. Sure enough, it was her,” You recounted; “Turns out, they had been waiting on the other to make a move. They’ve been married for...13 years now.” You said doing the math in your head.

Rafael’s jaw dropped and his eyes widened. Turns out you were quite the persuasive speaker.

“They’ve got two kids. One biological and one adopted. Even after they got together, he didn’t stop coming here every week. She would just always come with him.” You continued.

He leaned his face into his hand. He was positively amazed.

“Wow. Do they still come around?” He asked curiously.

You shook your head;

“Sadly, no. They moved out west a couple of years ago. Although, he still has family here so anytime he visits the city he’ll come by. So we somewhat keep in touch,” You answered; “Every time I see him, he thanks me for giving him a push. He never would’ve taken a chance if I hadn’t.” 

You took Rafael’s finished glass from the bar counter, setting it aside as well. He was speechless.

“Moral of the story, take a chance in life. You never know what might happen.” You advised.

“I’ll say. That’s incredible.” He exclaimed. 

You smiled, happy that he thought so.

“Does that satisfy your story telling request?” You asked.

“Very much so. I appreciate it.” He expressed his gratitude.

Just as you were about to offer him a different story, his cell phone rang. Oh, well. There was always next Wednesday. He fished his phone from his pants’ pocket, read the caller ID, and groaned. He began packing his things up and you took that as he had to leave;

“Duty calls?” You asked.

“Yep. I’m sorry to cut this short.” He apologized,

“No worries. You know where to find me. It was nice to finally talk with you.” You said sweetly. 

He smiled a bright, happy smile. It warmed your heart.

“You too. I’ll see you next week for sure.” He returned the sentiment.

He was in a rush to get back to his office, but you ducked under the bar to grab one of your business cards that had your number on it. With all this talk about taking chances, you found it appropriate to take one yourself. In the split seconds it took you to grab a card, he had already dashed out of the bar and down the street. You laughed in amusement, shoving the card in your pocket. You saw that he had also left a healthy tip, but with a small piece of paper on it as well. 

Looks like you weren’t the only one wanting to take chances tonight.

He had left his office phone number as well as his cell phone number. With a small note that read; 

Consider this as me taking a chance of my own. Call me sometime. 

You grinned, making sure you didn’t lose the piece of paper. You wondered how he was able to scribble out a note and make it out of the bar in the few short moments that you weren’t paying attention. But it didn’t really matter. You had a new favorite customer.

One that was going to have a bigger impact on your life than you would ever dream of.

[prurientpuddlejumper]

Out Tonight (Part 5)

<- Part 4 | Part 6 ->

Summary: It’s been 24 hours since you woke up next to a panicked Rafael Barba who turned out to have been much drunker than you thought. Despite the blame and confusion, there remained a primal attraction that led you to decide to try a (sober) date. Was this a terrible idea? Do you have anything in common besides drunk karaoke?

This was supposed to have smut but it’s just a date XD Smut next time! Soon!

3,431 words

Drunk. He must have still been drunk that morning. There was no other explanation for his wildly impulsive, juvenile decision to accept a date with you after that fiasco of a morning, waking up in your hotel with zero memory of what was almost certainly an even bigger fiasco of a night.

But he had agreed to it. Given you the address of his favorite coffee spot that didn’t have wheels. Set a time. It seemed childish to back out on you at the last minute just because he’d had twenty-four hours to sober up and think about his life choices. And so, Rafael Barba stood outside, leaning near the door out of the way of foot traffic, impatiently glaring at the minute hand of his watch.

At least it was only breakfast. Nothing exciting in the history of the universe had ever happened this early in the morning. Everyone in the relatively small Sunday crowd seemed too tired to be here. He would show up for one bleary-eyed date like an adult, make sure you were still alright, and, assuming your story hadn’t changed—that you hadn’t remembered something traumatic he’d forgotten he’d done—you could both part ways with a clear conscience.

***

The GPS on your phone indicated you were at the corner of the street you needed to turn down. There would be no going back if you turned that corner—the cafe was just a few doors down. You almost turned around and walked back to your hotel, but before you could leave, you saw him. Across the street, under the awning of the cafe, a short, well-dressed man radiating authority stood checking his watch with the words “Why the hell did I agree to this?” creased into his brow. You recognized that expression from your own face and almost laughed, only holding it in because you didn’t want to be that crazy person laughing to herself in the middle of a crowd.

His handsomeness had not been an illusion of the drink and low lights of the bar, you realized as you crossed the street. He was really fucking handsome. He wore another stylish and expensive suit, a colorful blue-striped tie, and you assumed suspenders under the jacket, and his dark hair was groomed with precision to the side.

By the time you were close enough to hear his voice calling out to greet you, you remembered kissing him, and how solid his chest felt when your arms were wrapped around him. A flush of heat warmed the base of your spine, and suddenly you were glad you had made this date after all.

Barba was not so sure. Not at first.

He wasn’t certain he would even recognize you in a crowd, but the moment you turned the corner, he spotted you. Your face was permanently stamped into his memory, right along with the time he wet the bed at a sleepover in second grade and the waitress to whom he’d replied “you too” after she told him to enjoy his meal.

The first thing he noticed was that your clothes were not as nice as he perceived when he was drunk. What little memory he had of karaoke painted you as a perfect goddess of seduction, with legs that went on for miles, wearing couture woven by angels out of dewdrops. Even in your disheveled state the morning he could remember, he had maintained a lofty impression of your image, or what he imagined it would be when you cleaned up. But the cute little sundress swishing around your knees as you crossed the street was not designer. It looked nice on you, but was more comfortable, practical, and a bit hippie-chic. You were even wearing a backpack instead of a purse. Your whole aesthetic was woefully down-to-earth. Like a Subaru. You were the Subaru of people.

Yet, even his unfortunate habit of judging people based on their clothing couldn’t dull the spark he felt when you drew close enough to smell your shampoo and look into your bright eyes. He couldn’t help feeling irrationally protective when those bright eyes froze as you stood in front of him, almost spreading your arms for a hug, then almost extending a hand, and then staring like a panicked deer that wandered into Times Square.

“Good to see you,” he smiled, pressing your shoulder amicably, sparing you from the decision.

***

After a short wait in line to order your latte and croissant sandwich, Barba squeezed into one of the tiny seats at one of the tiny tables in front of the window, and you squeezed in next to him. It was such a tight fit, your shoulders almost touched every time you lifted the mug to your lips, and your legs bumped accidentally amid stammered, awkward apologies.

“So...” you began, and your voice sounded far away, like you were trapped deep inside your own skull operating levers to make yourself speak. And you had nothing planned after “so,” and nothing came to you organically, so even though it was a trite, over-used question, you sputtered out, “How have you been?”

“Not bad,” he replied, just as stiffly rote. “You?” The boilerplate question sparked a deeper concern, and he twisted in his seat to grab your eye contact under a furrowed brow, and asked more seriously, “Are you OK?”

Your cheeks burned. He must have noticed how weird and nervous you were and thought there was something wrong with you. “I-I’m fine!” you squeaked.

His brows stayed wrinkled with worry. He lowered his voice. “If you… remembered anything. Anything painful. Something you need to work out, to process… report? I want you to know I will support anything you need to do. If I hurt you, I will do whatever it takes to make it right.”

“Oh!” You nearly spilled your drink. “No, no! God. Nothing like that. Just… embarrassment. Shame. I mean, if anyone should be angry or need to process stuff, it’s you. That was all my fault.”

He breathed a little sigh and his shoulders relaxed. He nodded to himself and turned back to his coffee. With a sideways glance and a sly smirk, he added, “You know, you shouldn’t incriminate yourself in front of a prosecutor.”

You were pretty sure he was joking, but your laugh was tight and high in your throat, and your palms began to sweat.

“Actually—” you reached into a pocket and pulled out your phone, “Tengo unos fotos… if it will help you remember?”

He stopped mid-sip, set the mug back down on the narrow shelf of a table, then coughed into his fist. A near spit-take. “What do you mean, you have photos? Qué tipo de fotos? Muéstramelas.”

Barba had forgotten, or didn’t care, that your Spanish wasn’t terrifically fluent and made his demand at a rapid, clipped pace. Fortunately, your first instinct was to show him.

It was a good thing he had already set down his coffee, because his eyes went wide, and he choked on the air. Picture after picture of him red-faced and disheveled, most of them with a wolfish grin and his hands all over you. He still had on his tie and the grey peppering his temples was evident, and you looked so young and innocent you could almost be mistaken for underage in the soft lighting. The angle of the selfie drew attention to your cleavage. You flipped back once more, and a crackle of tinny audio burst from the phone speakers as a shaky video of Barba singing the tail end of One Song Glory began to play. “Shit,” you cursed, and muted it.

“Delete that,” he croaked, raking his fingers down his face. “God, this is a scandal. Those look—I look—” His eyes narrowed, and he cocked his head with a brash, hostile grin. “Is this blackmail? Is this blackmail amateur hour?”

“What? No! Why would this be… Oh my god, are you cheating on someone?!”

He scowled with indignation at the very suggestion. “I would never cheat on someone. Those make me look like a… a boozy lecher. It could damage my reputation if they got out. Why do you have those?” he hissed, feigning a pleasant smile over gritted teeth. It looked like it hurt his face.

“You told me to take pictures and send them to a friend! You kept going on about ‘gathering evidence’ in case things went sideways.”

“That’s ridiculous,” he scoffed. “It is sound advice,” he considered. “That sounds like me,” he concluded, pinching his brow.

“I’ll delete them all, OK? See? I’m deleting them.” You clicked the trash button and watched them disappear one by one as Barba’s blood pressure went down. “Ooh, I’m keeping this one, though,” you said, fawning.

You flipped the screen to show him a selfie of him smiling wide and carefree, cheeks flushed, his arms wrapped around your shoulders, and you kissing his cheek. It was sweet, almost chaste. The karaoke stage was in the background, and you both looked like you were having a great night.

Present-Barba’s horrified expression didn’t soften. Your face fell. “Alright, I’m deleting this one too,” you soothed.

Your wistfulness must have tugged at his heart as you gave the picture one last look, trying to memorize the happiness you’d felt when you took it. With your finger poised over the delete button, he caught your wrist. “No… If you really like it, that one isn’t horrible. Just don’t send it to anyone in the DA’s office. Por favor.”

“I won’t,” you promised. His eyes were an overpoweringly lush green as they fixated on yours so close up, and you could swear there was a spark of the connection you’d felt that night. Then he blinked, and it was gone, self-consciously letting go of your wrist.

With that matter resolved, Barba became cold and distant, as if all he’d come to do was settle things from that night once and for all, and now he was done with you. You tried to carry the conversation forward, but he met your efforts to bond with the sober version of him with minimal, dismissive responses, leaving you in uncomfortable silence. He would barely even look at you anymore. It made you feel small.

Barba was right—you didn’t know him.

The mood was tense as you quietly chewed your croissant, and it would have been tenser if not for the cramped tables. Had you a spacious seating arrangement, you might have felt the distance between your two obviously different lives stretch out between you like a vast, insurmountable chasm.

Had you met the real Barba first, you would have known this guarded, cynical, tightly-wound ball of nerves and assholery would never sing karaoke without being three sheets to the wind.

The effortlessly charming open-book of a man you’d been wooed by two nights ago was a fiction crafted by alcohol. Without his flirtatious nature to offset the severity of his bespoke suits and high-profile job, you were weighted down with the thought that this man had his shit together more than you ever would. He was too good for you. He thought so, too. You saw that look in his eyes, the sarcastic quirk of his mouth as he glanced over you outside the cafe, though he’d tried to hide it. Your entire outfit cost about a tenth of his jacket alone, and his rich-jerk radar honed right in on it. Barba said you might not like him sober, and he seemed keen to prove himself right. When he finally did ask you questions, it felt like you were failing a test—his brow going up because you had never heard of some famous restaurant or popular composer, proving yourself a cultural dilettante in spite of your mutual love of RENT. When you asked about his job, he was all but sneering at your lack of legal acumen on what he considered very basic things.

You would have downed your latte in under fifteen minutes, shaken his hand, and never seen him again if not for one seemingly unimportant fact.

The table was cramped.

Forced to sit so close together, waves of his scent kept washing over you like an aphrodisiac. He smelled radically different than last time. Then, he was steeped in the stinging smokiness of scotch whisky and the heady musk of sweat from a long day on his feet in the courtroom and the claustrophobic press of bodies at the bar. Today he smelled clean, like fresh soap and a woody, spicy, citrusy cologne as old-fashioned and classy as his suspenders. There was something profoundly soothing in the way he smelled. Soothing enough to push back your anxiety about being unworthy of his attention, and enough to enjoy the sparks of heat spreading under your skin every time your elbows or legs bumped.

The smell of him and the press of his body was enough to make you horny, angry, and bold enough to take him by the hand once the date was done, and drag him somewhere you could teach him a lesson about underestimating you.

***

“You think you’re so much better than me, don’t you?” you growled over your shoulder, as if that was meant to be an answer to his question of “Where are we going?” He fell a step behind your determined pace as you literally pulled him down the sidewalk with a scary, but—he had to admit—sexy fire burning in your eyes.

“I never said that,” he cried unconvincingly, and felt he rather deserved it when you scoffed in response. He could be hard on people who couldn’t keep up with his standards, unless they were the victim of a horrifying enough crime to stir his compassion. And now that he was sure he hadn’t hurt you, well… you were just some woman from a bar who didn’t know the difference between civil litigation and criminal trials.

The fact that the neckline of your dress was so dangerously low, he caught a peek of something he shouldn’t when you leaned over your latte was just another reason to distance himself from you. He cursed his weakness for the tightening in his pants.

But that picture stuck in Barba’s mind. He was ashamed of his behavior, but at the same time, he was fascinated by this other Barba. The smiling Barba who didn’t make a million anxious excuses for why he couldn’t or shouldn’t be with someone he desired, who didn’t tell himself to wait, and wait, and wait until they were gone. He looked so comfortable with the woman on his lap in that picture. He wondered what exactly happened to make you grow so close?

After marching for several blocks, you finally slowed down where the geometric grey concrete of the city broke upon an oasis of wild green. Barba hunched forward, catching his breath in front of the entrance to Central Park closest to the pond. “Alright,” you challenged him with your hands on your hips, “Name one of these trees. Just one.”

“Shirley.”

You narrowed your eyes until he dropped his clever little grin.

“Worth a try,” he shrugged, straightening up. He unbuttoned his jacket to let some of the heat out. He pointed to a large tree near the path with three-pointed leaves and smooth, camouflage-patterned bark. “That’s a maple,” he said with confidence.

You raised your eyebrows at his breathtaking ignorance and tutted. “Oh, Rafael, that’s such an easy one. This is an American Sycamore, Platanus occidentalis. The bark is a dead giveaway, and maples have opposite leaf arrangement, while sycamore is alternate. But I’ll let it slide since the leaves are similar.” Your voice was dripping with intellectual condescension, and he immediately understood that you had brought him here to humiliate him. A familiar roar burned inside him that he felt any time someone thought they could get the better of him. His sharp eyes bore into yours, the slightest hint of a smile at the corner of his lips. Rafael Barba did not back down from a challenge.

He walked farther into the park, past sweeping rock formations covered with climbing children, and you followed behind, watching him as he swiveled his head in search. It was almost magical how the park felt like a trail in the countryside until you looked up to see the gleaming peaks of skyscrapers and 5th Avenue. Barba stopped next to a green park bench in front of a tall conifer with drooping branches. “Pine,” he said matter-of-factly. “I know what you’re trying to do, but even a city boy knows what a pine tree looks like.”

Except from the way your cheeks puffed out as you tried to contain your laughter, he apparently should not have sounded so sure of himself. Or you were just being vindictive, pretending he was wrong because you assumed he wouldn’t know the difference.

“That is a pine,” he insisted. “That’s basic middle school science class.”

“That is a conifer,” you corrected, still giggling at his expense, and his cheeks darkened with realization. Conifer. Pine. They were different things. He braced himself as you lectured him like a school teacher about how the Norway Spruce is in the genus Picea, while pine trees—and there was a White Pine right over there, too!—are in a totally separate genus, Pinus. When he tried to call it hair-splitting and trivia, you exploded. “You realize we live on a planet, right? All of human life on Earth couldn’t exist without forests—you literally need trees to breathe—yet you can’t identify a single one. Your furniture is made of maple, beech, oak,” you gestured to a few specimens, “but you don’t know what they look like growing in front of you. It is crazy to me how people lack even a basic understanding of the environment we can’t survive without. If we didn’t have laws, life would go on. If the whole world was paved like New York City, humanity would go extinct. So go ahead and judge me for not knowing who Puccini is when you know fuck-all about the planet.”

You had worked yourself into a lather, and all he could think was how much he wanted to kiss you. Your face was flushed, and you were so animated with passion for the subject as you laid into him—even though he knew nothing about it or even found it particularly interesting, he oddly enjoyed being torn apart by your arguments. You might make a great lawyer, if your clients were green.

“Are we even?” he smiled. “Now that you’ve judged me?”

You took a half step back and covered your mouth. “I… got a little defensive, didn’t I?” you cringed.

“Just a little,” he pinched his fingers together so they were almost touching. He stepped toward you.

“Sorry about that,” you laughed nervously. “Yeah. We’re even.”

He took another step closer, and you didn’t back away as he entered your personal space. He could feel his heart hammering behind his rib cage. Behind his over-dressed tie. His tongue darted unconsciously across his lower lip as he glanced down at that temptingly low neckline before snapping his eyes away to meet yours. He wondered if you’d noticed his glance. If you had, your reaction was not to slap him. There was a tentative hope shining in your eyes, breath catching as he stood too close to be platonic.

“So, you’re the Lorax,” he smirked.

“I do speak for the trees,” you said, glad to finally understand one of his references. “I work in conservation. Mostly management plans to control invasive species.”

He tipped his head back with a knowing “Ah,” that you were in some outdoorsy field. That explained your crunchy-granola vibe and the fact that you weren’t at all winded by speed-walking six blocks to get here. You fit in better here, surrounded by greenery, than in the city. You were some sort of forest nymph, a fae creature who had come out of the woods to seduce and enchant him, and spirit him away into the ether.

Your lips were close enough that he could capture them in one fluid motion of his neck, but he hadn’t yet, and now you were simply talking too awkwardly close together while a million excuses not to chanted in the back of his sober mind. So he reached for your hand instead.

“You know, there’s a whole field of environmental law that I am woefully rusty on…” he began. Linking arms, you chatted about your interests as you strolled through the park in the cool morning air of what would be a humid summer day.

• ● • ━━━━━─ ••●•• ─━━━━━ • ● •

@beccabarba​ / @caked-crusader / @itsjustmyfantasyroom / @thatesqcrush​ / @dianilaws / @permanentlydizzy​ / @mrsrafaelbarba​ / @da-po / @madamsnape921 / @charlottegrice / @onerestein​

[crtter]

Haven’t written my review for the new episode yet! It was another skit compilation, this time with a special focus on AUs (hence Cosplaymatsu, I believe!). There were a lot of skits, some I like more, some I like less, but overall... I’d say it was a pretty solid episode! Lots of skits means I have a lot to say so... sorry in advance for the lengthy post, heh.

In the Nothing-I-Can-Do-Police skit, Jyushimatsu and Choromatsu, in the roles of neighborhood passerbys, try to dissuade a certain desperate side character from jumping off a building. A passing policeman, played by Ichimatsu, is ill-suited to de escalate the situation though, given that he’s even more disenchanted with life than the to-be-jumper is.

Despite the heavy subject, was pretty funny to me. I wasn’t expecting to see the infamous Atsushi OR one of the Sutabaa barista girls in incidental roles like that, so that was a funny surprise. I thought Choromatsu and Jyushimatsu’s old men designs were very appealing as well. The ending was a bit predictable given the fact it’s Osomatsu-san and the thing the brothers resent the most is other people’s luck in love but I felt like it tied the whole thing together pretty well.

In The Hell?! Maid, Karamatsu is surprised when Chibita’s oden stand seems to be have rebranded itself as a Maid Oden Stand. Chibita, however, seems to be taking the maid role very seriously.

I know a lot of people dislike “boy character dresses up as a girl” jokes, very understandably so (and me included), but I personally thought Chibita dressing up as a café maid and performing the café maid role so well had a much more endearing tone than a mocking one. The humor of the skit wasn’t due to Chibita dressing up as a maid, but more due to how ill-suited oden is as a food item for a café setting and how clashing Chibita’s rude mannerisms are next to a maid’s cutesy ones, something I appreciated a lot.

Maid cafés are basically a staple of anime these days, so I also appreciated seeing Ososan’s take on it! To top it all off, we hadn’t seen Karamatsu and Chibita interact one on one like that ever since... season one? Karamatsu makes for a very good straight man next to Chibita’s particular brand of weirdness and it’s always a delight seeing those two together. Well, it’s always a delight seeing a Chibita skit, period. I just love the little guy. Definitely my favorite out of all the skits!

In No-Chance Trial, Osomatsu is brought to court to be judged for... farting crimes. Prosecutor Choromatsu and Defense Attorney Karamatsu eventually reach the agreement it’s not THAT bad of a crime. Judge Todomatsu, however, feels like the only appropriate punishment is the death penalty.

Another solid skit! I really liked the Ace Attorney references (even the BG music resembled the music of the games!) and Todomatsu’s insistence on getting Osomatsu killed for his insistent farting in his general presence got some good laughs out of me. There wasn’t a big side character presence in this episode with the exception of Chibita’s, but I liked Totoko, Nyaa-chan and Dobusu as members of the jury, and the Riceball robots as stenographers. The ending was, as Ososan is famous for, hilariously gross.

In Reborn As a Mosquito, Choromatsu is, as implied by the title, turned into a mosquito isekai-style when he laments not being able to find a girlfriend. As a mosquito, he’s free to bite pretty ladies whenever he wants to! That is... if he can bring himself to do such a uncouth thing.

This one didn’t amuse me THAT much, but it was a fairly decent skit. I liked seeing Choromatsu having second thoughts about doing something pervy for like, once in his life, heh, even if the devil on his shoulder tried to convince him otherwise. The double joke of him hating the taste of blood AND being killed right after that got a “ha!” out of me. Not my favorite and fairly uneventful but not a bad skit.

In Mister, Osomatsu is a local unemployed bum who entertain the neighborhood kids, played by his brothers, by making picture card shows in exchange for pachinko balls. The story he tells them eventually hits a little too close to home, though.

Not my favorite either, but I liked everyone’s designs a lot, and it was fun seeing the original tortoise and the hare fable getting more and more complicated as Osomatsu ends up making it about his life instead. Now, this is a VERY “me” complaint, and I’ll understand it if people don’t agree with me but! I felt like that was a role that would be better suited for Iyami. I mean, think about it! He’s already an unemployed bum living in a shabby house who’s bothered by local children in pretty much all his incarnations. It’d be perfect for him! But maybe I’m just a little miffed he didn’t show up.

Also, I feel like this might be a reference to something? I’ve definitely seen a very similar “local poor man puts on picture card shows for children” story in manga before. I’m going to look more into it to see if it’s a “thing” I’m not aware of.

In I-Do-What-I-Want Bartender, Todoko and Ichiko try to get a drink at a bar, just to find out the bartender, Karamatsu, fancies himself as an artist and refuses to serve them what they ask for, instead making fancy, elaborate drinks.

I liked seeing the Girlymatsu again! You know... even if it was just 33.33% of them, heh. This one wasn’t all that eventful either, but the joke felt pretty solid and I thought Karamatsu having so much trouble not acting on his “vision” and serving the girls what they asked for was pretty funny. Him loudly complaining thinking they couldn’t hear him was great as well.

In A Restaurant Filled With Mysteries, we see the return of Businessman Osomatsu, this time accompanied by Choromatsu as they try to get lunch in a foreign restaurant they can’t quite place where it’s from. Turns out that the restaurateur, a very unsual man from the unheard-of country of “Jyushimatsu”, isn’t going to make it easy for them.

I’ll be real: I felt like this could have... very easily taken a less-than-savory turn when it comes to mocking other cultures as “weird”, especially with the Indian-inspired imagery. In my opinion, they didn’t QUITE cross into shitty territory but they stayed... uncomfortably close to it. Reminded me a bit of the whole deal with the Oompa Loompas in the 2005 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie. The country was fictional, Jyushimatsu’s ethnicity was fictional (good call making him blue skinned) but... you know. They could have done it a little bit more tastefully. I did like the holes joke, though. It was a nice subversion of the whole ��gross foreign food” trope that’s still so popular in cartoons and such.

Well, that’s it! Overall, more good points than bad points, in my opinion. Next episode seems VERY promising when it comes to Iyami but I’ll get into it into another post. This one’s too long already.

[adultswim2021]

Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law #1: "Bannon Custody Battle" December 30, 2000 - 4:30AM | S01E01 Welcome to the first episode of Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law, the first show on Adult Swim’s roster that I rejected as a substandard product. It should’ve been the Brak Show. In the opening episode, Birdman takes a case from Dr. Benton Quest, better known as Jonny Quest’s father. Race Bannon is fighting for custody of the boy, arguing that he’s a much better, much more present father figure to Jonny. Harvey Birdman was first conceptualized with an episode of Space Ghost Coast to Coast. In the episode “Pilot” we’re shown a supposed disastrous pilot episode of “Coast to Coast” where Birdman was originally attached as the star. Birdman, a depressive, out-of-work super hero, utterly botches the job as his inability to host a late-night show due to his deriving all his powers from the sun becomes more apparent. The character recurs a few more times, most notably in the episode “Sequel”, where Birdman guest-hosts the show. Still, to call this a proper Space Ghost spin-off requires carrying a big asterisk along with it. The character name “Harvey Birdman” was invented for Space Ghost, but besides both being based on the old 60s Birdman Hanna-Barbera show, they have little to do with one another. One would get almost nothing out of watching the original Space Ghost episodes before watching this (except for, you know, getting to see episodes of a much funnier show).

So in Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law you have one 60s Hanna-Barbera character as a lawyer taking court cases from various other Hanna-Barbera characters, usually of a similar vintage. In this particular episode we’re treated to a lot of jokes about the homoerotic subtext of Jonny Quest, specifically the relationship between Race Bannon and Benton Quest. The writers decide to tastefully side-step the seemingly pederast relationship between Race and Jonny. Watching the original Jonny Quest with the same attempt to subvert and recontextualize the relationships between the characters through a modern lens, a certain type of observer would probably note the amount of shirtless roughhousing Race does with Jonny. Speaking of watching Jonny Quest: I have to admit something: I never really watched Jonny Quest at all before writing this blog. I’ve had an interest in older shows and cartoons my entire life, but the entire genre of action cartoon didn’t appeal to me whatsoever when I was a kid. So last night I watched my first episode of Jonny Quest, in glorious 1080p on my new 4K television; a format it was never EVER intended to be viewed in. Jonny Quest is objectively junk. It’s fun, boyish, escapist entertainment, and there’s a lot of good irony in it, especially with it’s antiquated portrayal of other cultures from a bygone era when we were far less connected to the rest of the world. It has limited animation and simplistic design. The backgrounds look like they were painted on a post-it-note and most of the men are drawn to look like reskinned versions of Race Bannon. But there’s at least something a LITTLE charming about it. In fact, there was one moment of beautifully scripted action that absolutely won me over: Race and Jonny’s speed boat goes airborne briefly and crushes the bad guy’s boat from above as they speed towards one another. I nearly cheered when it happened. I knew The Venture Bros took liberally from Jonny Quest, but the coolest action sequences on that show seemed to be striving for the same exact visceral reaction I got from seeing Race crunch up some lizard men on a boat. Birdman is a similar deal: He was a cookie-cutter imitation of comic book heroes from the silver-age of comics (the obvious comparison here is DC’s Hawkman). I actually did watch a Birdman adventure late last night as I was falling asleep to follow up on Jonny Quest, but it felt less important. I can remember checking out the original Birdman on DVD not too long ago. Also, your typical Harvey Birdman usually focuses on jokes about shows other than Birdman. Still, it’s neat to see those characters in their original context, as well as that Hanna-Barbera stock-explosion animation we all know and love from Space Ghost blowing up Zorak on Coast-to-Coast. Also the episode I watched will be heavily referenced later, but not for this. I only watched the first episode of Jonny Quest taking a cue from my friend Kon who noted that most of the references in “Bannon Custody Battle” are directly from the first episode. The most specific (and funniest) scene in the whole show involves the Lizard Men, the main villains of that first installment. Other characters show up very briefly, and are all ones that appear in the opening sequence. Unless I find out differently (I’ll probably try to make my way through the rest of Quest in preparation for Venture Bros.), it really does seem like the writers just watched the first episode of Jonny Quest to write this show. Watching this episode of Harvey Birdman was like batting away an existential crisis. I remember vaguely at the time not being SUPER hot on this show, but I cut it a lot of slack and trusted that it would simply get funnier. I wanted to love all the shows on Adult Swim. Anyway, I went from being lukewarm on Birdman, to hating it. Reading my own earlier review of Birdman I blasted this episode for being homophobic. I used to have a very low tolerance for gay jokes, back when they were highly in fashion. But now that we live an era where there’s an arms race to find new ways to scold one another for perceived slights gay jokes can sometimes, NOT ALWAYS, be a little refreshing to hear. The fact that my stance on gay jokes can change as long as it’s in direct-opposition with the rest of the world is at least a little troubling. Does this mean I’m an inauthentic reactionary? Yes. Yes it does. There, I admitted it. Now, let me off the hook, please. I say that sorta jokingly. The gay jokes in this are mostly pretty lame, and come off like Mike Scully-era Simpsons gay jokes. The early scene at the beginning where Birdman eyes widen when he’s misunderstanding the nature of Dr. Quest’s and Race Bannon’s relationship really does come off as early 90′s homophobia. I remember it seemed out of place at the time. I’m sure it played just fine in the midwest, but the show didn’t really put it’s best foot forward with that. Speaking of lame jokes, this episode has a few that have nothing to do with insulting gay people. One of my least favorite bits involve the specific gag of undercutting a dramatic moment with characters fumbling around awkwardly in true-to-life fashion. Why, if a person tried to recreate a dramatic sting you’d see before a commercial break in real life, you’re right, it’d probably go awkwardly! But this 11 minute show has at least 3 explicit examples of this, and it’s only mildly amusing once:

Bannon dramatically walks out on Dr. Quest, after announcing his intention to take Jonny with him. He awkwardly comes back because he forgot his keys

Birdman dramatically argues with a rival prosecutor and summons his personal digital assistant, and then awkwardly fumbles with it

Birdman proves that the Race Bannon on the witness stand is actually a robot by unplugging him, but he accidentally pulls the wrong cord and has to spend a few seconds untangling and retracing the correct cord.

Another thing about Birdman is that there is usually a lack of strong jokes. The show usually includes a layer of comedy where there are simply characters who simply have odd, scattered speech patterns or odd ticks. The rival lawyer in this slurs his speech in a particular way: cut to the jury looking confused. That’s the joke. The Judge grumbles in an ornery fashion and generally acts like he doesn’t wanna be there. He says stuff that sounds like bad improv. That’s the joke. The show will only ocassionally come up with jokes to justify these character traits. It’s just silliness that doesn’t usually go anywhere. But, I do kinda like some things about this episode. It was animated by J.J. Sedelmaier, known for early digital animation seen in the crude era of Beavis and Butt-head and SNL’s TV Funhouse. They really do have their own style of comic timing, and there are some gags in this where the animation works in their favor. There are some jokes where the drawings really sell the comedy. I’m not sure if I liked this animation better or worse, but it does match the oddly-stilted Jonny Quest animation better than the episodes that came after this would have. Oh, one of the funniest bits not on the show was when I popped in the DVD I forgot that the menu music is Wesley Willis’ “Birdman Kicked My Ass”. If I were in high school when the DVD came out I would have loved it just for that reason. Same could be said “Jonny Quest Thinks We’re Sell-Outs” by Less Than Jake. I was an easily impressed kid.

[kneamet]

Angel of cards (13/16)

Trigger Warning: no.

Summary: Joker, Mr. J, anarchist psychopath, Tom Hiddleston. He had many nicknames. Joker was Gotham’s most dangerous and insightful man, with sharp makeup and horribly memorable scars on his face in the form of a smile. He was absolutely crazy and deadly. No one knows his real identity and everyone is afraid of his cruel jokes. But what happens when he becomes obsessed with an ordinary girl?

She belongs to him. No one can take her away from him. Even The Batman.

Chapter thirteen: the Hospital

"Dear Bruce,

I'll be honest with you... I'm going to marry Harvey Dent. I love him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. When I said that if Gotham didn't need Batman anymore... we can be together... I wasn't lying. But I'm sure the day will never come when you don't need Batman.

I hope I'm wrong. And if so, I'll be there. But as a friend. If you have lost faith in me, please keep your faith in people.

With everlasting love, Rachel, " Bruce whispered the last sentence softly, resenting the loss. There were gentle tears in his eyes. The hand clutched the paper on which the love words were written.

Why Rachel? Why her? Why exactly the love of his life, and not... someone else? Why did the Joker say this address and not some other address? Why did he name the place where Harvey is?

"Alfred?" Without taking his eyes off the window, his right eyebrow slightly raised, but still with an emotionless, steely voice that had an anxious and trembling note in it, Wayne asked.

In his peripheral vision, Bruce could see that Alfred had entered the room, dressed like a string. He couldn't see his expression or feel his feelings, but he knew that his beloved butler was also deeply sorry.

"Yes, Master Wayne?" asked Alfred, in his usual voice, with a hint of regret in it. He knew how much his master loved Rachel.

"Is it my fault?" Bruce asks with a sigh, feeling the paper get wet because of his sweaty palms from the fear of responsibility. "I was supposed to inspire good... not madness and death, " Wayne's always calm voice faltered. His jaw trembled slightly. A single tear rolled down her cheek.

"You inspired good, but you spat in the face of the Gotham mafia. Did you think there would be no consequences?" Alfred asked, still holding the bottle of wine in his old hands, which Bruce would probably drink in one gulp. "Life always gets worse before it gets better," he sighed again and stood up from his comfortable black chair, turning to Pennyworth.

"But Rachel, Alfred," he countered, raising his voice slightly. It was too much to bear. Will Bruce be able to cope with such grief on his own? Would the general darkness swallow him up?

"Rachel believed in what you stood for. Gotham needs you, " the butler said in a reassuring old voice, moving closer to his master. He just looked down.

"Gotham needs a real hero," a real one. Not like him. Gotham needs someone who can always defend their rights and protect Gotham in a truly legal way. "And I almost let that psycho blow him to hell," Bruce whispered softly, referring to the Joker.

Wayne's hand, which was already holding the piece of paper with the love and voluptuous words, only tightened and tightened. The Joker. This blood-pumping and frenzied lunatic who only thinks about how to destroy Gotham.

And what about his equally beloved Blake? The same person who could always support him when Rachel was away? And if Rachel, he sighed, could be subject to that darkness, he didn't notice it for Blake.

Still, what does this fucking nutcase want with his best friend's niece? Bruce licked his parched lips of honey that had become wet from the tears of the meek.

He must understand everything.

***

"She wanted to wait for me," Harvey mumbled, gripping his aching knuckles tightly. He could still see the pleas and screams of his beloved as she died. Rachel. He opened his mouth slightly in annoyance, pulling his lower jaw forward. Will he be able to live without everything now?

First, the Joker took away the first ray of light in his life — Blake. His beloved niece, whom he adored with all his kindred love. Would he have been able to break into the ranks of prosecutors if he hadn't been there? Hardly.

The second thing the Joker took from him was Rachel. His favorite, his sweetest girl, for whom he was willing to do anything. Exactly the same one. The one who always supported him, helped him.

He didn't listen to Gordon's useless talk. Even aside from the fact that he was a very nice person who really felt sorry for him, Harvey didn't want to see him right now. His obsessive and mumbling behavior only irritated him and injected more anger.

"I'm sorry about Rachel," he said suddenly, after a long silence that lasted about a mortal two minutes. Dent choked on his breath. "The doctor says you have a terrible pain, but you don't take your medication. That you refuse... from a skin graft, " knowing that it would not entail anything good, Gordon said quietly. Harvey only stifled a guttural growl. Idiot. Idiot. What kind of mumbling creature is this?

"You remember that name... what you gave me... When did I work for you?" Dent asked, turning to face Jim, who was standing with his head down and his brown-and-green cap in his hands.

He could see the flash of fear in the commissioner's eyes, but immediately suppressed. Is he afraid of him? But why? What's there to be afraid of? These burns on the second half of the face? Or what?

"How was it, Gordon?" he asked in a more severe voice, squinting his right eye.

"Harvey, I am..."

"Speak up," Harvey said in a steely and very stern voice, feeling an uneasy shiver run down his spine. He knew the nickname. Knew. "Speak up!"

"Two-face. Harvey is two-faced."

"Why hide who I am now?" the man asked, baring his teeth and swallowing.

"I'm sorry," Gordon said in a low voice, only clinging more tightly to himself. He didn't like being shouted at, even though he'd seen a lot of things in his life.

"No," came the steely reply again.

***

Damn Moroni! The Joker thought furiously. His thoughts were now just a hailstorm of thoughts and a chaotic chaos that couldn't calm down. He licked his dry, bland, cold lips with a rough tongue. He was walking briskly toward Harvey Dent's room.

Oh, yes, the very man he had almost killed, and whom Batman had saved just in time. What a good boy he is. He would have to do it again somehow, and arrange a soft and favorable game for his favorite toy.

Although to be honest, Batman was eerily boring. That mumbling, stern voice and thoughts that he couldn't even properly show and say. Were you sure he was Bruce Wayne, the son of rich parents?

The Joker clenched his fists. His nostrils flared wide and he drew in a sharp breath. He resisted the urge to grimace. He likes the smell of the hospital. Medical supplies and equipment. Terribly. It's disgusting. Antiseptics for surface treatment, autoclave, hospital food, quartz, and the patients themselves, who apparently rarely wash, also had an unpleasant smell.

The Joker pressed the black plastic doorknob, pushing open the white door and entering a room that was clearly designed for premium guests. He chuckled, licking his painted lips again. Sloppy.

He quickly looked around the room, trying to find something that could be used against him. His quick and deft eye caught only a small silver tray, but he was unlikely to be able to defend himself with it.

The Joker sat down on the brown chair next to Harvey's bed. What beautiful burns the fire had left him, the Joker grinned. It definitely suits him. And how he hadn't done that to himself before. He stifled a small laugh.

"Hi," the Joker drawled, grinding his teeth together and making an unpleasant sound. Harvey, of course, woke up. The man saw the body of the injured patient tremble slightly and suddenly Harvey turns his head, shuddering slightly and trying to stand up.

"You know..." the Joker drawled again, prolonging the intrigue, until suddenly he noticed the terrible look of his interlocutor. Why is he looking so surprised? Oh, yes, the nurse's costume. In general, he liked it.

The Joker, or rather Tom, always liked to dress in women's suits. He felt to the bottom sometimes... more complete, or what? Yes, I suppose so, considering that it was only his mother who took care of Tom at the time.

He pulled back his fake red hair, trying to mess it up even more. Although it would seem that much more? They were already in a very sloppy state.

"...I don't want any hard feelings between us, Harvey, " the Joker curled his lips in disdain, slightly pinching his nose and frowning. "When my angel..." The Joker liked this savage look of Harvey, who was ready to tear anyone up for his favorite girls in the form of Blake and Rachel. But now that neither one, that is, Harvey, nor the other, that is, Bruce, has a favorite, how will they cope now?

How good it was that he had an angel of his own.

"Blake!" said Harvey loudly. The Joker grinned imperceptibly and raised his hands in the air, as if admitting the truth of the other person.

"...my angel was kidnapped ... " the Joker continued, taking great pleasure in Dent's anger. "...I didn't kidnap her. More precisely, I kidnapped her, but not to kill her. I'll do you a huge favor... My angel, or yours, or maybe Bruce's, Blake, is still alive. And I confess from the bottom of my heart, I'm being a gentleman to her," he saw Harvey's displeased face.

What doesn't he like? His niece is alive and well, she is happy to spend time with him, what is the problem?

"By the way, I didn't detonate those bombs," the Joker said quickly, as if trying to get off the subject, raising his hands again and licking his lips. To be honest, it was not pleasant for him to go without his favorite gloves.

It's terrible to look at your scars. They're so awful, Tom thought, suddenly breaking into the Joker's thoughts. Go away, Thomas! You're in the way! And didn't the Joker tell you that it's not exactly the right time to show up? Yes, and that very moment of obsession.

"These are your people. Your plan!" accused Harvey loudly, trying to rebel again, but the Joker only let out a nervous laugh, after which Det immediately stopped moving, froze with his eyes wide open.

"Do I look like someone who has a plan?" the Joker asked in an insistent tone, arching an eyebrow. He chuckled. However, suddenly, his eyes widened and he quickly jumped out of the chair, lowering his shoulders down and taking quick steps towards the door.

Harvey asked when the Joker was already out the door, but still not closing the door. The man just smiled reassuringly.

"My angel will miss you, I know, but I promise I'll beat the crap out of her and she'll be my wife," the Joker said unctuously, watching as Harvey's eyes began to grow larger. He tried to do something again and began to move quickly, trying to free himself and stand up. Suddenly, a door slammed. "Goodbye, Harvey-ee-ee," the Joker sang.

The man began to walk quickly towards the main exit. Now the fun begins. I wonder if the media will like this show? But he didn't want to think about it now. His biggest concern right now was his angel. Oh, how she must have missed him... Hungry and bored for sure. Well, he would help her.

And now we need to kill Harvey Dent.

[screamingaboutaceattorney]

Spirit of Justice Cases Ranked

Last one! This has been a lot of fun, I think I might do something like this in the future! Anyways, let’s go!

DISCLAIMER: Spoilers ahead! This is also all my own opinion (and subject to change), so please don’t take this as fact or whatever. Also, there are very few cases that I actively dislike, since most of them are extremely good in my opinion. Enjoy!

#6: The Magical Turnabout

I wish I could put this one higher, but I can’t. Trucy is precious, and that scene in the detention center is always so sad. Her aside, though, this case is pretty good. I like the characters, the focus on magic was cool, and new information on Troupe Gramarye is interesting while simultaneously depressing. On the other hand, though, Retinz needs to be punched in the face and I unfortunately can’t do it. This case also introduced Nahyuta, who is cool, but one of my least favorite prosecutors. He feels too tacked-on to Apollo’s backstory to me, as does the entire Khura’in plot. I’m not saying I don’t like it, but I feel like it could’ve not happened and we would’ve been fine. But that’s not about The Magical Turnabout, which is still a really good case!

#5: Turnabout Storyteller

I’ll be honest, the main reason I like this case so much is because of @ministarfruit and their art based on it (check out their blog btw it’s really good!!!!!). Even without that, this case is very fun and silly. I love Blackquill coming back, and the characters are fun and interesting! This case also brought Blackmadhi to life, and I can’t tell if I ship that more than Skyemadhi, but either way, I’m glad it exists. I hope we get more Athena cases in AA7!

#4: The Foreign Turnabout

The Foreign Turnabout is tied with Turnabout Trump for my second-favorite first case (I love Turnabout Memories so much). It’s a wonderful introduction to Khura’in, the Divination Seance, the DC Act, and, of course, Rayfa and Ahlbi, both of whom I love. If I had to pinpoint any flaws with the case, it would be that they really thought a nine-year-old killed a perfectly healthy fully-grown adult and that Payne returns, though the latter was really unavoidable. Either way, this case was a lot of fun and I really enjoyed it!

#3: The Rite of Turnabout

*chanting* MAYA MAYA MAYA

In case you haven’t realized by now, I fucking adore Maya. She’s one of my favorite characters, and I was so happy when she showed up again. This case is mostly this high because of her, though I also really like Datz, the fact that the death was a suicide (that hasn’t happened since Magnifi), and the sense of impending doom with the guilty verdict was overwhelming. But Maya was also accused twice (which needs to stop, it’s not funny and never has been), and the Divination Seance was particularly awkward. Overall, though, I thought this case was a lot of fun!

#2: Turnabout Time Traveler

This case was AWESOME! I really liked how the writers tried to make it a “retro” trial (even if that setup has only happened once (hi Turnabout Samurai) and even then didn’t have Larry), that was a really cute idea that they pulled off well! Ellen is goddamn adorable, and I liked the romance between her and Sorin. My only gripe with the case was the fact that Miles and Phoenix didn’t get married, like, they’re already both on the case, it’s about a wedding, why would yOU NOT--

#1: Turnabout Revolution

Welcome back to “Let’s take away another person who’s close to Apollo, how many does he even have left, he’s got his boyfriend and his best friend and his coworkers and that’s fucking it, I don’t see anything wrong with this.”

Jokes aside, though, Turnabout Revolution was a really fun case! Dhurke was fun to interact with (even if he was a kinda shitty parent), Armie was adorable, and taking Ga’ran down was incredibly satisfying. I particularly liked the revisualization sequence where it was revealed Ga’ran had no claim to the throne, and the trial against Phoenix was nerve-wracking in the best possible way. While it was a bit long, I don’t think that it would’ve worked as two separate cases. Not the best in the series, not by a long shot, but still a great case and a perfect ending to this game.

And... that’s it! I’ve given my thoughts on every Ace Attorney case! This was a lot of fun to do, but I don’t see myself doing something like this for a while. I would like to do something similar again at some point, but I’m still proud of this. Hope you guys enjoyed, and I’ll see you again soon!

[everythingisgayandnothinghurts]

The Darkest Depths - Part 1

A visit from his mom is meant to be harmless, but instead it sends TK into a tailspin of depression and darkness.  Will he be strong enough to fight or will he be dragged down into the darkest depths?

“TK, can you stay a minute?” The young firefighter turned on his heel at his father’s voice and made his way up the stairs two at a time to approach the glass encased office.  The flash of anxiety would never fail to hit when his father asked him into his office.  It had been a good day on the job, no losses and every success.  He hadn’t had a problem on any calls or taken any risks deemed unnecessary.  Despite knowing it had been a smooth day, TK couldn’t help thinking for a moment that he was in trouble.  The look on his father’s face didn’t help this fear as TK took in the pinched skin by his eyes and his lingering frown.  

“What’s up?  Everything okay?” TK asked as he slowly sat in one of the vacant chairs in front of the desk.  His father hesitated and that alone made TK’s nerve skyrocket.  His father didn’t hesitate about anything.  He only hesitated when it was bad news or when it had to do with-

“Your mother is coming to town.”  His father looked like he had swallowed something sour and while TK was glad it wasn’t detrimental news he still wasn’t thrilled about this impromptu visit.  

“To Austin?  For how long?” His shoulders slumped and he was already gearing up for a miserable dinner or two with both of his parents.  

“For a weekend.  She wants to have dinner with us.  She wants to make sure this is an okay life for you after the shooting and all.”  It was always amazing how bitter his father sounded when he spoke of his ex-wife sometimes.  Particularly when said ex was coming to check up on them.  To see if Owen could provide for him properly after she left.  

“Does she mean to act like I’m a kid still?” TK grumbled as he watched his father slump into the chair behind his desk.  “Does she realize I'm an adult and I can choose a life for myself?  She acts like she has a right to examine my life after she’s the one that left it.”

“Now, she is still your mother and she cares for you very much,” The familiar lecture came up and it seemed like no matter how much time went by or how often TK was hurt he was still required to respect the woman who gave birth to him.  He had fond memories with his mother when he was a kid, but that didn’t change the sting of when she left when he was nine.  She chased a career ladder higher than he could join her for and now she was a top prosecutor in upstate New York.   “I’m going to set us up to have dinner at the house Saturday night, alright?  We’re both off that weekend and we can have a nice night in.  I would say bring Carlos but…”

“It’s likely not going to stay civil,” TK finished for him and felt a little bad as his father cringed.

“I wish that wasn’t the case, but she likes to hit nerves.  Maybe you could introduce her to Carlos on Sunday before she leaves?  I know she would want to meet him.”

“And interrogate him on his life choices and how he’s treating me?” TK rolled his eyes and ran a hand through his hair.  “We’ll see how dinner goes first.  I’ll gage what sort of mood she’s in.  I promise I’ll iron a shirt and seem somewhat put together, okay?”

“I’m sorry this is hard for you,” His father apologized and TK could see the guilt in his clear eyes.  “I know dinners with both of us isn’t your favorite.  I will do my best to steer things in a civil direction.  She doesn’t know about your latest overdose and I promise it will stay that way.”

“I’m kind of surprised she hasn’t pulled any and all hospital records for the last year,” TK sighed and got to his feet.  “I gotta head out for dinner with Carlos.  Mom will be mom and then she’ll be gone again and we can get back to normal.  I’m not too worried about it, but thanks for the heads up.  Making vegan lasagna?”

“It’s the only vegan dish she likes so yeah,” His father pulled him into a fond hug before sending him out the door.  

It took him under twenty minutes to get home, but TK couldn’t remember one minute of his drive to the place that most felt like home in Austin.  He was trying not to make this visit a big deal, but he couldn’t dread the questioning and examining and somehow he knew his mom knew more than what his dad had told her.  She had a lot of pull in New York and somehow she probably knew he had overdosed six months ago and coupled with getting shot she was coming around to tell them both what a mess they were making of things.  Her visits weren’t light, especially on such short notice.  

“Something wrong with dinner?” Carlos asked him after they had sat in silence for most of their shared meal.  TK shook himself out of memories and assumptions and realized he hadn’t eaten much of the steak and potatoes Carlos had made for them.  

“No, it’s good I’m sorry,” TK ate a bite of his cold meal and chewed thoughtfully.  “My mom is coming for a visit this weekend.”

“That’s big,” Carlos remarked and it was funny how even he knew how out of the ordinary this was.  “She on a business trip out here?”

“She’s coming to evaluate my life since I got shot,” TK sighed and went back to pushing around his food.  “Which means she’s going to come out here and criticize anything she can and make us seem like we’re doing everything wrong.  She hates that I”m a firefighter like my dad, always has.  She thinks it’s too dangerous and too consuming of a career.”

“Most parents are pretty proud of first responders,” Carlos frowned and reached to put a hand on his knee.  “I’m sorry she makes you feel bad about something undeniably heroic.  Does she know how much you love it and how good you are at your job?”

“That would probably make her more bitter and angry,” TK felt his stomach twist and already knew he would be lucky to manage half of this huge meal.  “She’s not an easy woman to please.  She has opinions and never would accept that maybe she’s wrong.  She hated how my dad chose the firehouse over our family a lot after the towers fell.  He was at work more than he was home for months.   She ended up leaving us less than a year after that and she has always parented from afar since then.  I chose dad in the divorce and ever since I’ve followed in his footsteps.  It’s driven her crazy and she’s never approved.  Plus I turned out gay, and while she won’t say it I know it disappointed her.  It’s complicated where she’s concerned.”

“That’s a lot going on,” Carlos had put his full attention on him now, and TK felt bad he was soiling another meal.  

“It’s okay, really.  It’s just a weekend and then she’ll go back to New York.  I’ll be fine.  I know she loves me, strong opinions aside.”  He sighed and rubbed his forehead.  “She may want to meet you.  If you’re okay with that.”

“I would be happy to meet her if that’s what you want,” Carlos rested a hand on his back and rubbed gentle circles.  “You’re a good man Tyler, and she can see that.  Anyone with half a brain could see that.  It’s just for a weekend.”

“A very long weekend,” TK echoed as he leaned into Carlos’s touch.   How much damage could be done in one weekend?

~~~~~

The rental car pulled into their driveway and TK bit his lip, feeling ten years younger suddenly and back in high school all over again.  He hadn’t seen his mother in almost a year and he hadn’t been eager to reunite.  He loved her, but not so much when his dad was around at the same time.  They had gotten less civil as time had gone by, starting with his dad’s second wife and not improving even after the second divorce.  

“You good?” HIs dad put a hand on his shoulder as they both watched her finish up a phone call while in the car.   Truthfully he felt like he could be sick at any moment, but he could get through another dinner and only hope she knew nothing more than what they told her.   

“I’ll be fine,’ TK felt like he had said that countless times since learning she was coming.  “You got the wine ready?”

“Funny,” Owen said dryly with a roll of his eyes.  

“You think I’m joking, but there’s no way you two are getting through this without it.” 

“ We’ll get through this, kid.”  They both watched as Gwynth got off the phone and out of the car.  She was dressed casually in jeans and a blouse and to the observer she seemed perfectly harmless.  She seemed like any other mother coming home for dinner with her family.  

“I’ll get the door,” TK headed toward the door, a small part of him glad to see his mother after his near death experience.  They may not agree on everything, but she was still his mother and he would have hated to never see her again.  

“Hi mom,” TK said, swinging the door open wide and bringing her into his arms gently.  

“My baby boy,” She said softly as she pressed a kiss to the side of his head.  “It’s good to see you standing on your own two feet.  You need to stop having these injuries TK, you’ll make my heart stop one of these times.”

“I’ll try I promise,” TK ushered her inside and waited for the sniping to begin.  His parents tried to be civil for his sake, but it was safe to say it didn’t always work.  They had three courses to get through together and then hopefully not be all in the same room for another year.  

The salad and lasagna went off without too many problems.  There was the usual amount of sarcasm and sniping around, but nothing unusual.  His mom made the usual comments about his job and his choice to move at all from New York, but if that was all she was here to gripe about TK was grateful.  

“I think we lost TK to fantasies about his boyfriend,” Owen teased as he noticed TK zoning out by the time they were having some pie for dessert.

“Are you seeing someone?” His mother’s interest was piqued now and TK felt himself blushing before he even answered the question.  

“Uh, yeah his name is Carlos,” TK glanced between the two of them.  “It’s a pretty recent thing, but he’s really great.  Better than I could ask for.”

“Let’s just hope he’s fine with never seeing you and having your life at risk constantly.  Not to mention never settling down.”  Gwynth’s comments came off as harmless, but it felt like glass pricking his skin and digging deeper.

“Gwynth,” Owen said warningly.  “You need to quit.”

“What?” His mother said as if there was nothing wrong with her assumptions.  “You both insist that TK can make all his own choices and his choices sum up to never being home and constantly being in and out of hospitals.  We both know TK isn’t really the type to settle down.”

“I asked Alex to marry me,” TK said stiffly, the reminder nearly gutting him.  He hated to bring up Alex, but he couldn’t just let that comment lie.  “I am perfectly capable of settling down when the guy isn’t cheating on me, Mom.”

“How do you expect to settle down with this career you’ve chosen?  Do you really think it’s fair to put a spouse through what your father made me go through?  All you two have talked about tonight is your new team at the firehouse.  The two of you will never change from obsessing about your jobs.  Who would ever be okay with that kind of life?”

“Carlos is a police officer,” TK said quietly, her words echoing in his head and he hated the doubts that were rising within him.  Did he have a right to ask Carlos for that kind of life with him?  He already had enough reasons to leave, but would that be one of them? “He understands the hours of the job.”

“You plan on settling down with someone else who is never home?  How is that going to be a life for a kid?  Doesn’t that strike you as selfish?  TK, darling, you need to think a little with that pretty little head.  If your father has taught you anything, I hoped it would be that this lifestyle isn’t good for a family.  Don’t you remember how he left us constantly when you were a kid?”

“I didn’t leave,’ Owen protested with his eyes full of worry as he gazed over at TK.  “If the towers hadn’t fallen it would have been different.  TK and I have always had a great relationship, even with my unsuitable career as you would put it Gwen.”

“I know you think I’ve chosen everything wrong,” TK said quietly as he gazed down at the half-eaten pie on his plate.  

“I don’t,” Gwenyth protested as she leaned forward earnestly.  “But you can’t pretend like this life is the best for you.  You’ve been in the hospital shot after only being in Austin a few months and that’s not even talking about all the visits last year from injuries.  Not to mention your little overdose.”

It felt like wind was roaring in his ears as TK felt his extremities go numb when she brought up the worst moment of his life.   He had known she would dig it up, but still a part of him hoped she didn’t know.  This was one thing he couldn’t handle being thrown in his face.  

“How could you bring that up?” Owen hissed as TK struggled to breathe let alone find words to respond with.  “How do you even know about that?  Why are you digging up his records?”

“Well, Owen, if you would just bear to be honest with me I wouldn’t have to.  I just had his hospital records pulled and I assumed I wouldn’t be finding any surprises.  An overdose and neither of you thought to tell me?”  His mother was livid and it was clear this was what she had really wanted to get to.  

“I had it handled!” His father’s voice started to rise and TK felt his hands start to shake.  “It was nothing more than an accident.  He’s going to meetings and going to therapy sessions.  I can take care of my son without your help.”

“An accident?  Is that what he told you it was?  He’s been using since he was fifteen and you think he could overdose by accident? Please tell me you’re joking, Owen.” Gwenyth’s words were like out of his own personal horror movie.   Not only did she know about the overdose, she wasn’t about to buy that it was an accident.  Truthfully TK didn’t know if he had meant to kill himself that night after Alex had revealed his infidelity.  He hadn’t lied when his father had asked, but now he wasn’t entirely sure it had been the truth.  He had known he was taking a few too many pills.  He hadn’t assumed it would kill him necessarily, but he couldn’t say he would have cared at the time if it had.  It had been a year since that horrible day and his life had improved in each and every way.  Carlos was responsible for a lot of the happiness he had in his life now.  He was the most amazing boyfriend TK could ask for, but sometimes he really doubted he deserved someone that amazing.  

“I have to go,” TK got out between numb lips, knowing he had to go find Carlos before his panicked brain made him do anything stupid.  This dinner was too much for him to handle.  Normally dinner with his mom was mildly unpleasant, but this time she had come to draw blood.  He knew most of it was directed towards his dad’s parenting, but it still hurt when it was about something that personal.  “I’m sorry Mom, but I need to go.  It was good to see you.”

Both of his parents called after him, but nothing could stop him from grabbing his jacket and stumbling outside his dad’s house, gulping in the fresh air like he was a drowning man.  That house felt suffocating with the two of them once again going at it with him in the middle of their arguing.   It brought up bad memories of their divorce when he was younger.  He hated them arguing, always had.  

He pulled out his phone and pressed his latest call to hold to his ear.  Carlos was always top of his recent calls list and today was no exception.  It didn’t take long before Carlos answered, barely finished with his shift for the day but TK knew he was off tomorrow with him.  

“C-come get me,” TK stuttered over the line with his entire body shaking and his mind whirling in a million directions.  His mother’s screaming disapproval echoed around him and her accusation that he tried to kill himself acted like a noose.  “Please, please, come.”

“Baby, tell me where you are,” Carlos’s soft voice urged him from the other end.  “Are you still at your dad’s house?”

“I’ll meet you at the station,” TK forced himself to focus enough that he realized he had started walking in the direction of his second home without realizing.  “I couldn’t stay there.  I had to get away.”

“I’ll be right there, okay?” Carlos soothed him as best as he could over the phone.  “Deep breaths for me, okay Tiger?  It’s going to be okay.”

“It was awful,” TK said tearfully as he curled up on the front steps of his favorite place in Austin other than Carlos’s house.  “It was like she picked me apart slowly and thoroughly with no regard for my feelings.  She wanted to hurt my dad and shredded me apart in the process.”  He let out a sob and barely heard Carlos swear softly before trying to comfort him as best he could over the line while he raced to get there.

They were silent until the crunch of gravel told TK his boyfriend had arrived not a minute too late.  He shakily pressed the red phone at the bottom of the screen and curled into himself to sob softly.  Carlos didn’t waste a moment to fling open his door and kneel next to him and wrap his arms around him.  “Shh, carino, I”m here now.  I’m so sorry she was awful to you.  It’s okay, love.”

“She doesn’t think we’re gonna m-make it,” TK sobbed out against Carlos’s shoulder.  “She doesn’t think I can have a family.  She thinks I chose everything w-wrong in my life.  She can never be p-proud of me.”

“She doesn’t know you, amor,” Carlos told him with a kiss to his head.  “She doesn’t know us.   Let’s get you home and in a warm shower, okay?  We have all day tomorrow to ignore everyone else.  Let me take you home.”

TK curled against the door as he let Carlos buckle him into the passenger seat as he felt like he was drowning in something dark and awful that had been opened by his mother.  It was starting to rain and the sound was soothing as he closed his eyes and tried his best to stop crying.  It wasn’t new what his mother said, none of it.  Lately, however, he had been having so many doubts about himself as the one year anniversary of his overdose came up.  He had been starting to feel numb again even with Carlos as his loving boyfriend and having the most amazing team at work.  He had thought that the numbness would fade once he could find happiness.  He thought happiness was really something you sought after, but he was finding that happiness continued to slip away from him.  

“You ready to come inside?” TK blinked to see Carlos in front of him crouched next to the open car door as rain drizzled down on him, making the curls he loved appear.  He shook himself and slowly undid the seatbelt as he felt a blush rise to his face.  

“Do you think I’m overreacting?  Plenty of moms say stupid shit and not everyone acts like...this.”  TK stands and it feels as if his shoulders are weighed down with bricks.  

“I don’t know much about your mom,” Carlos said slowly as he took his hand and lead them inside.  The door closed and TK already felt safer behind it than he did out there.  TK felt at home here in more ways than just a place to sleep.  He felt safe here and protected by the man at his side.  “I think this is different because she left you.  You want to please her and that’s perfectly normal.  She isn’t around so you feel like you want to please her from afar and when it doesn’t work you feel like you failed.”

“I just wish she could say she was proud of me,” TK wipes tears away only for them to be replaced moments later.  He felt miserable and angry and while it was better than the empty numbness it wasn’t pleasant.  “Would it kill her to acknowledge that i’ve survived a lot for being under the age of thirty?  Then after never being around she thinks she has the right to snoop around and pull up my overdose to throw that in my face over dinner?  Does she think it doesn’t make me feel anything to think about that day?”

“She didn’t have a right to do that,” Carlos agreed quietly as TK paced around the living room running his hands through his hair repeatedly.  “That was an invasion of privacy.”

“Ever since she left everything is about her failed relationship with my father,” TK ranted.  “My entire life has been about their divorce.  I chose the wrong parent to live with when I was younger.  I didn’t make the right kind of grades in high school like my father.  I went to fire academy and she didn’t even come to the graduation.  She didn’t so much as send a card saying she was proud of me for something I wanted to do.  She never bothers to show up when I’m injured on the job.  She just talks to all my doctors and pulls my files before yelling at me about my career choices.”  He had started crying some time during this rant while Carlos sat on the couch silently watching him.  “Then I tell her I’m with someone I really like and all she can do is tell me about how I chose the wrong person and how I am going to be a horrible father and a horrible partner.   How I can’t have a family because of my career.  Where does she get off judging me on a life she’s never wanted to take a part in?  She claims she’s here to see me after I got shot, but really she’s only here to judge everything about my life and try to talk me out of doing what I love for the millionth time.”

“Okay, take it easy Ty,” Carlos stood up to stop his pacing that had gotten faster and faster while he talked.  “One weekend and she’s gone, remember? You’re right that she doesn’t have a right to judge your choices when she doesn't want to be a part of them.  You’re right to feel hurt and angry and upset, okay?  I just hate to see you cry like this.”

“I need a shower,” TK muttered, knowing he was reacting badly to something he had even admitted was temporary, but the words cut deep.  He was so tired of feeling not good enough no matter how many lives he saved.  He was tired of the struggle to get up every morning and act like that day was going to be better than any of the others.  He was supposed to feel happy at some point.  He was supposed to find it when he found Carlos, but that simply wasn’t true.  The honeymoon phase was over for them and now it was back to the struggle.  He had thought the overdose had to do with Alex, but honestly it was so much more than the break up.  He had never felt good enough for anyone, even his own expectations.  

He scrubbed at his skin harshly under the hot spray of water, trying to scrub away the way his mother’s criticisms seemed to crawl on his skin.  Scrubbing away all his imperfections, but there were so many that he wasn’t sure what was left.  His mother had always thought he was rather airheaded and couldn’t think for himself.  She thought he was unsuitable to have a family.  She knew about the overdose and how weak did that make him to her?  She saw straight through him.  She knew he had tried to take his own life and couldn’t even do that properly.  Now he was dragging Carlos through his problems and making him take care of the damaged person that was left.  Nobody deserved the task of picking up his pieces and he truly wished he cared enough to do it for himself.  He didn’t think he was worth the effort.  

He shuffled from the shower into bed with skin that was far too red and Carlos looked at him in concern over top of his book.  TK avoided his eyes and tried to hide the flinch as his sensitive skin came in contact with the sheets.  He flopped down onto the pillow and tried to prepare himself for a sleepless night next to a man nobody thought he deserved.  

“Give me your arm,” Carlos’s voice was soft, but firm enough to hold no argument.  TK glanced over to see he had pulled out a bottle of lotion from his nightstand.  

“You don’t have to take care of me,” TK mumbled but gave over his red arm anyways.

“I get to take care of you,” Carlos told him with a gentle smile. “Especially when you can’t.  It’s just some lotion, okay?”

TK was silent as he let Carlos massage the smooth lotion into his abused skin.  How long before the darkness consumed him this time and even Carlos couldn’t save him?

[cncofantasias]

Justice-Christopher Velez

Chapter 2: How Did We Get Here

Summary: You’ve dated your boyfriend Christopher Velez for 2 years and even now that you guys have been together for so long, there was still so much stuff Christopher refused to tell you. That is until Christopher gets arrested for the murder of a man named Zabdiel de Jesus. As the trial against Christopher goes on you learn things about him that you never thought he was capable of. Y/n is fighting between the Christopher who was her loving and adoring boyfriend and the man who’s committed so many awful crimes.

Chapter 1

-

A week had passed and today was the first day that I’d be allowed to see Christopher in a visit. Christopher’s lawyer, Mr. Pimentel had been able to explain some of the charges to me in further detail and arrange this visit for us today. But, nothing seemed real unless I saw him in here and he told me specifically what he had done.

“Cómo llegamos aquí Christopher?”

“En un carro cariño”

“Que crees? That this is a joke. Does it look like I’m laughing or I think that this is funny Christopher? You’re facing serious time y ahora ni se..” my voice cracked I looked up at him, searching his eyes for anything that could give me the hope that he didn’t do it.

“Ahora, I don’t even know who I’ve been laying in bed with.”

“Por favor dígame algo que me puede indicar que no haciste esto,” my eyes watered, pleading to him.

But, instead he looked down.

“Mi amor, we’ll get through this. I need you to be strong, te amo. My lawyer is going to fix everything, no te preocupes.”

I paused for a second and we just stared at each other, taking in every feature like it could possibly be the last time we saw each other.

“Te recuerdas Christopher, when it was Sunday night and I was at home studying for my big exam at school. I was stressed out and I called you crying saying that I was going to fail and I was a failure. You dropped everything abd you came to my house with flowers and a my favorite pizza. Ese noche me ayudaste estudiar por horas. And when we were finished I took me to bed and you just held me—“

My voice broke, but we never stopped staring at each other. The passion was still there, it was just messed up somehow now. I cleared my voice, shut my eyes for a second and regained my strength. I had to be strong, strong for him but mostly for myself.

“You held me and for those moments; I felt so safe and I forgot about my exam, about my worries. All that mattered was you.”

His hand reached across the table and he held my hand, “I remember that night, I remember seeing your beautiful face when I came to your door covered in tears and red. I hated seeing you like that and it made me work harder so you wouldn’t have to. Amor, en todo lo que va pasar with this trial. I— I love you con todo mi alma. I’m sorry I messed up, no estaba pensando en lo negetivo que podía afectar nuestro futuro. I was just thinking about the money and how if I got us enough money we would be able to go off to some other country, after you graduated with your medical degree. You’d be this amazing doctor and I your proud husband. Necesito que sabas that through everything, you were always on my mind. Always my first priority and the reason that I did certain things.”

I shook my head and finally the tears fell, I didn’t think I’d cry in front of him. But I couldn’t help it, I couldn’t believe everything I’d began hearing since this whole thing started. All the stares I’d been getting from the cops and the victim’s family; it made me feel like I was guilty in a way. All I wanted was to believe that he wasn’t guilty and to hold him one more time. But none of that was possible.

I looked up and I stared at him, “What’re we going to do?”

He hesitated for a second, but once he saw the look in my eyes he knew he couldn’t keep lying anymore. “This is my mess and I’ll take care of it, all I want you to do is be there at my arraignment tomorrow mi amor.”

“Velez, it’s time to go!”

I looked at him one more time and I took in his face knew I wasn’t allowed to, but I reached my hand out and I nestled his face. He sucked in a breath and kissed my palm before getting up and walking away in his shackles.

-

“Mr. Velez, is a flight risk and is being charged with the murder of Zabdiel. He is suspected to be the leader of a gang. We request remand your honor.”

“How does your client plead?”

“Not guilty your honor. My client is actively involved in community projects and has a long term girlfriend at home. He is willing to surrender his passport and wear an ankle bracelet.”

“Like I stayed your honor, Mr. Velez has strong ties to the community through gang affiliation.”

“Bail is set at half a million dollars, he will surrender his passport, and will wear an ankle bracelet. If for whatever reason, these terms are not upheld on your part Mr. Velez you will be charged with contempt of court. Is that understood”

“Yes your honor.”

My chest heaved, I didn’t know how to feel because a part of me felt relieved to be able to take him home even for a few days or weeks. A part of me just wanted him home so I could hold him and we could talk in private about all of this. But the other... the other was scared of what more there was to talk about.

I heard a commotion on my right side, I turned and I looked to see a woman yelled at the prosecutor, “So you’re telling me, he kills my baby and he gets to go home still. Como si nada! Mr. Erick Colón you better start acting like a better lawyer in court or I’ll go and find a better lawyer.”

“Si entiendo señora. Perdon, I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure he gets the maximum sentence. But I need you to go home and relax. You getting worked up will not help our case, only damage your health. Señora por favor, just let me do my job.”

“Ándale mami, let’s go it’s going to be okay.”

She gave him one last scolding look before her eyes teared away and met mine. I could see the grief, the wear in her eyes. But I couldn’t imagine what she was going to through and I had to look away ashamed of the fact that we were in this situation.

-

It was the following day a Friday, 2 pm. We had managed to get the half a million dollars and I was currently waiting for Christopher to be released. It wasn’t till I heard the loud buzzing and the sound of the latch on the heavy door unclick that I looked up.

There we were: him standing in the doorway with his regular clothes on and I sitting with my hands on my knees scared to get up. But, then all of a sudden it was real and I ran towards him hugging him.

“Como extraño tu olor y estos labios-“

He grabbed my face and kissed me, saboring my lips.

“Come on mi cariño let’s go, I just want to be at home with you.”

“Okay babe, vámonos.”

We walked hand in hand to the car and like a gentlemen he was he opened the passenger side of the door for me. I blushed, it had felt like we were on our first date again.

“Me agarraste flores! Wow que caballero!” I said smiling, blushing.

“Don’t worry mamita, hay más de eso,” he said winking at me. I shook my head, taking the flowers from him, “There better be, let me go put these in water and I’ll be right back.”

By the time I had gotten back, he was patiently waiting on my couch, “okay vamonos.”

He opened every door in sight for me: the front door, car door, the venue door. And he never complained, but he did make a point of being over dramatic in a cute and funny way.

When we got to the venue he quickly unbuckled his seatbelt and hopped out of the car; he practically ran to my door to open it. When he did he bowed with a, “My lady.”

“Pienso que estás olvidando algo”

“What’s that?”

“Your car keys,” I giggled to him, wiggling the keys in my hand. He chuckled and turned a bright red before taking my hand and helping me out of the car.

-

By the time we were settled in at home, it was already 4 pm. I had made up 2 cups of coffee and the pizza guy was on his way with my favorite.

So, I set his cup down in front of him at the table and naturally said, “you have a lot to explain and we have a lot to talk about.”

“Yo se mi amor, y te voy decir todo. I just want you to know that some of it is ugly.”

———————————-

Reader’s Note:

Okay ojalá que te gustaron this chapter because it was difficult to write. I had so many ideas and I feel like this chapter is bad if it is I’m so sorry. Por favor señoritas y señoritos perdóname. Let me know what you guys think!

[obviouslyelementary]

It’s about family - Chapter 5

Ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24198928/chapters/58490806

Warnings: Remus being a dick and the others responding to it.

Ships: Demus.

Tags: @yuna-dan

---------------------------

Chapter 5 - Feeling fine

Patton could still faintly hear the conversation in the room next door when he and Logan made their way inside the luxurious bathroom. It was truly a sight of dreams: a beautiful marble sink, a bathtub, golden faucets... Remus was really rich. Really really rich.

Logan closed the door behind them both and looked at Patton while he distracted himself with the decorations in the bathroom, squealing softly when he saw a porcelain frog on top of a shelf.

"Look Logan! It's so cute! Can I steal it?" he asked, as a joke, taking the little frog in his hands and showing it to his friend, but Logan rose an eyebrow at him and removed the porcelain piece from his hands, putting it down on the sink.

"Don't act like this Patton. You know I know all your schemes" he said, firmly, and Patton immediately deflated, sighing and sitting on the closed toilet seat. After a moment of silence, Logan placed the frog back on the shelf so he could sit on top of the sink, arms crossed over his chest. "Aren't you going to talk to me, Patton?"

"I don't have anything to talk about, you were the one that brought us here" he said, grumpily, like he did when he didn't want to do something. He could be a dad, but he was still very much a child at heart. He looked up at Logan, but the teacher just rose an eyebrow again and made him look down with a sigh. "I'm fine... and I know you won't believe me but I am."

"Patton... I will believe you, as long as you are honest with me" he said, and then reached for Patton's hand, holding it and making him look up. "I'm your friend. Your best friend. I know you inside out. I just want to make sure you are comfortable, because I know you will shut your worries and problems down for the sake of others, and I know Roman and Virgil really need us here. I just want to make sure you know that I can handle this, in case you cannot."

Patton couldn’t help but smile at that, his eyes even burning a little. God, Logan was the bestest of friends he could have ever had, and he really cared about him, even if he wasn't all that good at showing. The worry in the teacher's eyes were enough to make Patton sigh and stand up, pulling Logan for a dreaded hug.

Logan didn't like physical contact, but he hugged Patton back with no hesitation.

"Oh Logan... you are... you are the best" Patton said, a little emotional, before he pulled back and held the teacher's hands. "I promise you I am fine. Sure, a little uncomfortable, and maybe a bit too vulnerable, but I am fine. I can and I will stay here for my friends. And Janus clearly doesn't intent on saying anything, so I don't think we need to worry."

"Well that I did notice... he seems to be just as keen as you to remain silent about the fact that we do know each other" Logan admitted, and then looked at Patton, furrowing his eyebrows. "That will not refrain the talk from happening. If he is Remus' partner, and if he remains here in town like Remus surely will, then eventually the truth will come out, and we will have to talk to Roman and Virgil about it."

"Yeah yeah I know" Patton said, sighing and looking at the closed door, hearing Roman's loud laugh coming from it. "But not now. We first need to figure out how to help Roman and Virgil deal with Remus coming back... also what do you think of him?"

"Remus? Oh he is clearly an immature individual with self-esteem issues that would rather push those vulnerabilities on others rather than facing them himself and solving his own issues. I dislike him, that is what I mean."

"I know what you mean" Patton chuckled and shrugged. "I mean he is quite rude and I thought I would have to fight him for almost making Roman cry, but I don't think he is that harmful. We just need to make sure Virgil and Roman don't feel personally attacked."

"Do not worry. He is clearly not prepared for any good remarks I might have, considering his reaction to my retort to his offensive remarks about Roman. So I have everything under control" Logan said, and Patton smiled at the hint of pride in his voice. "Also, apparently Janus has control over him, so as long as Janus is around, I don't think Remus will be much of an annoyance."

"I do think you're right" Patton chuckled, and then stood up, smiling at Logan. "Now can we please come back? I'm hungry and I want more wine, it is... fantastic!"

"Of course. Just... don't forget you can always count on me, okay Pat?" Logan asked, and Patton grinned, pulling him for a tight hug that this time was not corresponded.

"Of course, my goofy little cutie favorite teacher of the whole wide world!" he squeaked, and Logan blushed deeply, shaking his head and sighing while he smiled.

"Good. Let's go."

 When they came back to the room, Janus, Virgil and Roman were still in a deep conversation, both men shifting on the couch to sit closer to Janus. Patton and Logan then sat closest to the empty chair where Remus had been sitting, and only a few moments later he showed up again, carrying two glasses of wine and seeming a bit calmer than before. The conversation immediately died, and Janus accepted both the glass and the kiss with a smile.

"Thank you honey. Are you feeling any better?" he asked, and Remus let out a sigh, nodding and sitting on his previous chair while looking away from everyone in the couch. Janus raised an eyebrow at that, and tilted his head just a bit. "Love?"

"... I'm sorry for my rude behavior" Remus said, through his teeth, and Virgil grinned so wide that even Patton was impressed his face could do that.

"Oh my fucking god, what happened to you?" Virgil laughed, clearly more comfortable now, and Remus sent him glares that could have killed him, if glares could kill. It was so similar to Roman's killer glare that Patton felt a bit unnerved. "You're like a little doggie that learned tricks and doesn't want to disobey your master!"

"Virgil" Patton said, noticing his turn to calm down his friends since the power seemed to be shifting "behave. Don't be mean."

"Thank you Patton" Janus said, finally addressing him directly, and Patton snapped his head to the side to look at him, not even noticing how he noticed about Janus never directly talking to him, and also noticing how his heart seemed to rate at the single saying of his name through his lips. "Now that we are all calm, why don't we have a civilized conversation about, well, anything. As long as we don't go hurting each other."

"Well... since you asked us what we do, what about we ask you? What do you do for a living, Janus?" Roman asked, smiling at him, clearly more at ease and seeming to quite enjoy Janus' company. The host gave Roman a smile, and crossed his legs again, sipping on his wine.

"Let's see... I too come from a rather wealthy family, so I have my own savings and I praise a more... luxurious life. But after I worked for years to become a judge, and solved many cases as a lawyer and a prosecutor, I decided to put my law days aside for a while at least and pursue my true passion, teaching."

Oh that... that was new.

"Teaching?" Roman asked, amused, and looked at Logan. "We have three teachers in this room that's marvelous! And what are you going to teach? And where?"

"Well, I applied to the local school as a high school history teacher, and I have already been accepted. I will start to lesson in the next Monday, so I believe Logan will see me quite often" Janus said, and Logan pressed his lips together, before nodding slowly.

"It will be a pleasure to work with you, Janus. Someone who studied law as their major surely is very intelligent and capable of teaching students about whatever they desire" Logan said, but it felt a bit tight and lacking the usual excitement Logan had when he talked about his work.

Patton hoped it wasn't because of their... situation.

"For sure working with you will be a blast. I already have so many ideas we can discuss for interdisciplinary activities, since the world now is so connected and interesting."

"Indeed. Many teachers are quite excited to start planning some different activities for the students, you will probably learn about them as you go" Logan said, still not at all excited, and the conversation seemed to die for a moment, with no one saying anything.

That was when Patton felt his phone vibrating in his pocket and took it out, looking at the message he had received. He hummed and stood up, excusing himself, and going to the bathroom to accept Thomas' call.

"Hey kiddo!" he said into the phone, closing the bathroom door, and hearing Thomas sigh in the other end.

"Dad, we are out of ice cream!" he whined, and Patton frowned, looking down at the clock. It was past ten pm already!

"Thomas, you are not going to eat ice cream after ten pm! Even if we had ice cream! That's bad for your stomach!"

"But daaaaaaad I really want ice cream!"

"Thomas, you are fifteen years old, why are you whining as if you were five?"

"Because that always makes you buy me what I want..."

"... tomorrow I will go and buy ice cream. Tonight you are going to have to serve yourself with whatever we have there. I think there are some cookies on the second shelf inside the cabinet. Be careful! You're not tall enough to get it so use a-"

"Already got it!"

"... Thomas did you climb the counter with socks on?"

"... how do you know?"

"Ugh... fine just... eat those cookies and go to bed before midnight! Okay?"

"Alright dad! Love you! Have fun!"

"Love you too... and he's gone" Patton said, pulling the phone away and chuckling to himself. He shook his head and walked back out, all the eyes turned to him making him blush.

"Is everything alright?" Virgil asked, always the one worried about everything, and Patton chuckled softly.

"Yeah, Thomas wanted ice cream so he called me to whine about it. The usual" he said, getting in his spot again and sitting down. He looked around to see Janus staring at him, and the host sipped on his wine before shifting on his chair.

"So Thomas... is your son correct?" he asked, and Patton nodded, smiling at him.

"Yes he is. My good old boy Thomas."

"How... old is he?" Janus asked, clearly curious, but there was something else in his eyes Patton couldn't quite put his finger on it.

"He is fifteen. Just started high school" he said proudly. He was very proud of Thomas.

Remus just let out a chuckle, shaking his head.

"Having a kid in high school? Being a single dad to a teenage boy? Working at a toy store to pay your bills? Your life sounds like a living nightmare" he said, and it wasn't as mean as it was just... honest. But Patton just turned to him and smiled.

"Many people see it like that, but in all honesty, it is extremely rewarding. I took Thomas in when he was recently born, and even though most people thought I was too young and naïve to have a child and raise them on my own, I didn't listen to them and did the best I could. I got a job instead of going to college, I rented a small apartment, and I was the best I could be, saving money everywhere I could, and now I am able to pay my rent, make sure he always has whatever he wants to eat, buy him presents, and he is just a lovely kid. He is sweet, smart, talented, everything I could ever wish for, and I think I raised him really well. So yes, it sounds like a nightmare to most, but to me it was a dream! A dream come true! I don't have much, but gosh the love I have for my kid, and the love he has for me too, it is so much more than any successful job or material gain, or even romance could ever give me. Everyone has their own desires, and mine was always to have a kid and put them into the world. So I am fulfilling my dream. Are you fulfilling yours?"

That end wasn't supposed to feel so rude, but it was honest. Patton... loved his life. He wouldn't change it for the world. And the look on Remus' face, of both surprise and shame, made him feel bad but proud at the same time, because that showed that Remus hadn't even found his dream yet, let alone conquered it.

Everyone had a different dream. He knew Logan's consisted mostly in teaching everything he knew and learning more and more every day; Roman's was to make sure children knew that dreams were possible and having someone in his life to love and cherish until the day he died; and Virgil's was to live a peaceful life with friends and take care of the little things that made him happy, like the flowers he sold in his shop and the animals he took care of in his spare time. Everyone had a different dream, and from what he could see, Remus had one too, hidden underneath layers and layers of lies and façades he wore.

And Janus... well... Patton didn't know.

"Well, this talk is all funky and dory but I am fucking done with you and I want to get wasted, high and fuck" Remus said, clearly having enough, and walking to Janus, handing him his glass. "Have fun talking to your guests. We are having one of those nights" he added, and left the room looking pissed off. Janus sighed and put his glasses down, looking at the four friends at the couch and giving them an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry. I think... he wasn't ready to see you."

"Um... if you don't mind me asking... what does it mean, when he says 'one of those nights'?" Roman asked, always way too curious, but Janus just sighed and shook his head at the question.

"Remus and I are in an open relationship. Usually we don't have anything with anyone else but tonight it seems like he wants to" he said, shrugging, but he didn't seem too happy or settled in that regard. And Patton wasn’t the only one who saw it.

"You don't seem happy with that arrangement" Virgil said, tilting his head at Janus. "You know open and polyamorous relationships are supposed to bring as much happiness as monogamous relationships right? If you don't like it... or don't accept it... it is still cheating."

"Oh I know. And I like it and accept it. I just don't like his reasoning behind it sometimes" Janus said, smiling softly at Virgil. "Thank you for your worry but you don't have to think about it. I know how to handle him. So. Any of you want anything else? A drink, some food?"

"I would love to eat something" Roman said, and Logan agreed with a nod, so Janus reached for the phone on the table next to him and called someone, telling them the food would be on its way soon.

They stayed the rest of the night in that room, forgetting about the party downstairs, eating and drinking until they were full and drunk. Patton decided not to drink much, so he wouldn't do something he would regret later, and they all parted their ways at around one in the morning, being accompanied by Janus to the car and making sure Logan would drive, since he was sober.

Janus watched them leave by the entrance of the house, the party still going strong inside, and Patton couldn't help but watch him and wave shyly, blushing a bit when Janus sent him his usual side smile.

He was beautiful... and very dangerous. Patton knew that very well.