#he’s so multi-faceted!!!!!
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get you a man who can do both
#he’s so multi-faceted!!!!!#people who say maximus is boring and uncomplex as a character literally fight me#he is so nuanced and deeply characterized#the fact that he’s such a good devoted and honorable man makes him less interesting???#in our world of morally gray antiheroes we’ve lost the ability to treasure a character who is genuinely good-hearted#that’s why maximus stands out so much as a movie hero#we don’t see characters like him because hollywood thinks morally gray = the only way to be interesting#you people don’t know where our media culture came from!!!#you people don’t realize that without characters like maximus the antiheroes mean nothing!!!#you have to have the standard before you can have the deviation#and maximus is the golden standard#his goodness and honesty and sincerity and kindness and selflessness shadow everything he does#it changes the entire course of the film#it drives not only his character arc but those of the other characters too!!#i recently saw an article describing maximus as an antihero and i was like#DUDE#YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT WORD MEANS#maximus is literally the blueprint for a traditional hero and that’s why i will never cease being obsessed with him#he is the hero i need in my life#we all need a superman and he is mine#maximus how i adore you equally for your fierce snarls and your soft smiles#my perfect beautiful wonderful husband <3#gladiator#maximus#maximus decimus meridius#gladiator 2000#russell crowe#funny#memes
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3.13 | ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀꜱᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ʟᴏʀᴅꜱ
link to the post I accidentally wound up prattling endlessly about in the tags 💀
#doctor who#tenth doctor#martha jones#david tennant#freema agyeman#(good god. without even meaning to I went into 'psycho stream of consciousness tagging' mode. whoops)#always thinking of that one post#where OP mentions how the writing tries to make it seem like Ten looked right through Martha/etc#which is a good concept for demonstrating his grief. but also isnt what we really see throughout S3#(not saying he wasn't a grieving MESS because he was. but he's a multi-faceted character and he can grieve AND value Martha simultaneously)#but we see such fierce protective instinct+trust; a bond between them that obviously isn't some one-sided affair#+ his clear intent to impress her/be admired and respected by her (apropos the post that inspired this sentiment)#but RTD obviously isn't the most infallible of writers#*cough* [list of reasons I cut down b/c long] *cough*#He can make Martha say “he's not seeing me/he doesn't look at me” but then you just watch with your eyes and you get a different story#It's like the opposite of when Moffat tries to make you believe someone is super important through bold claims without showing his work#instead RTD tries to make you believe Ten is functionally blind to Martha's existence while showing numerous examples of the contrary#then bring in the novels+myspace blog+cartoon that he all signed off on. Which tie together to create a canon backdrop#basically I said all of that to say this—#it's the whole reason I had to make this blog to get this sort of stuff off my chest (even if it's just for me sometimes)—#Ten not only SAW Martha—he trusted+respected+enjoyed+adored her. And it's a good thing#it doesn't cheapen his grief. I feel like people must think it does which is why I constantly see bad unnecessary takes about them#it just means that Martha was SO important to him and it's ok. they had a killer friendship outside the unrequited minutiae and it's ok#there's even a comic where 'someone' makes him believe she's Martha and he makes her change her appearance because “it's still too raw”#Just saying you don't say that sort of thing about someone whose existence you're all blasé about#Martha already gets fucked by the narrative in enough ways without people totally missing her significance in the Doctor's life#you don't have to ship them to appreciate them on a deeper level#anyway. fuck. if you actually read all of these then I'm so sorry#creating this blog has taught me that there are only like two people who feel the same way about tenmartha matters and it’s fine 😂#but if I didn’t give myself an outlet it would probably form a tumor SO there we are then
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Yearning…
Now available as a print on my InPrnt!
#ofmd#ofmd season 2#ed teach#digital art#art#artists on tumblr#my art#guys im so normal about the new trailer holy fuck#love ed in his revenge emo era but i still havent gotten over his pathetic dressing gown era#hes so multi faceted and meow meow#s2 it gonna wreck us all i just know it#also obvs heavily inspired by Flaming June by F. Leighton!!! love that painting a lot#fungusart#prints
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camilikha on twitter posted with mtl the part of the TGCF Audio Drama production team's talk where they discussed hua cheng's character concept, and i love what the AD team said so i attempted a rough translation of the CN text:
"The core of Hua Cheng's character: Ultimate beauty, ultimate danger, ultimate devoutness The simultaneous contradiction and balance in his feelings: On one hand, he has a yearning desire that is blasphemous; on the other hand, he sees Xie Lian as sacred and inviolable, so he simultaneously possesses a devotee's sense of worship and sacrifice [1], and restraint [2]. His love is akin to a fire in the abyss; on the surface he approaches everything with effortless skill and ease, but in his heart he is always simultaneously suppressing and yet burning with fervour and zeal."
*translation notes:
[1] "献祭 worship and sacrifice" here refers to the religious act of a worshipper making sacrificial offerings to their god. the sacrifices offered to the god can be other people/things, or oneself.
[2] for the part about "restraint 禁欲", the CN phrase used refers to religious asceticism or abstinence (the AD team used many phrases with specifically religious connotations in this description of HC). however, "asceticism" felt to me like the wrong eng word for HC as he is not ascetic at all, nor is his devotion or love chaste. I struggled to find an eng word that fit here, but this is what the AD team was likely referring to (his abstinence during the centuries before he met XL):
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(I think the AD team may also have been referring to how HC initially attempted to hold himself back early in Book 1/Arc 1 for fear of overwhelming XL at first (during the period before they started kissing and HC realized XL fully reciprocated his attraction and desire).
and just my thoughts but i love how the AD understood HC as character so well! i love how they highlighted how he is simultaneously the concept of the most faithful devotee, and the most ardent lover. whether it's his religious devotion or his romantic/sexual love for XL, it's intense & passionate to the highest degree
i also love how they described the juxtaposition btwn HC's effortlessly calm & competent exterior, vs the intense passion he holds within. i really love how well the AD understands his character and allows HC to be as layered, multi-faceted and gorgeously romantic as he's meant to be
#tgcf audio drama#hua cheng#hualian#tgcf#heaven official's blessing#the AD is my fav adaptation they rly understand the characters so well and are most true to the novel#i love how they highlighted how he is simultaneously the concept of the most faithful devotee + the most ardent lover#and how whether its his religious devotion or his romantic/sexual love for XL#it's intense & passionate to the highest degree#i also love how they described the juxtaposition btwn HC's effortlessly calm & competent exterior#vs the intense passion he holds within#i really love how well the AD understands his character and allows HC to be as layered#multi-faceted and gorgeously romantic as he's meant to be#my translation
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gojo writers i now Formally understand the joy you all feel when writing about him
#truly. satoru always has Endured every single waking moment of his life#having someone recognize that and NOT fault him for it??? it’s not only what he needs but what he DESERVES#i’m just waxing poetic abt everything i admire about satoru like he really is my favorite man ever#he’s so cool to me i just think he’s the best lil guy out there#and i like the idea of his selfishness/selflessness#bc i think it’s a real fine line and idk if i WOULD call him selfless but then honestly sometimes i would absolutely call him that#he’s soooooooo multi faceted and people don’t give satoru the credit he deserves#he has so many amazing attributes i can’t wait to talk abt them in this fic#it’s midnight and once again my talent of willingly posting when dash is dead is a talent and also part of my charm <3 :3#personal#snippets
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Today’s a good a day as any to give a semi-gentle reminder that Essek is a multi-faceted character and him being bitchy and canonically Neutral Evil for a portion of time does not preclude him from also being sweet in other moments. Like his whole character arc was about growing from being the aloof Shadowhand who didn’t care about anyone or anything but himself and his research. Depicting him as caring about things and people other than that is fine and good actually.
Or, in the wise wise words of Brennan Lee Mulligan…
gifs from this post
#I’m so fucking tired of people acting like one facet of him is better or realer than another#no he’s multi-dimensional#get over yourself#I’ve kept my mouth shut long enough
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I swear someone asked for a fic about the first time the Cubs saw each other cry, BUT I THINK I DELETED IT I AM SO SO SO SORRY!! :(((( However, I still wrote it, so whoever it was, here is my gift to you. Giving you a big virtual hug!!
There are some canon times we do see them cry, so I took some liberty with this. So these are SOME of the first moments we see them cry with one another, as I have imagined them.
Side note, it was REALLY hard to come up with something that would make Finn really upset. I feel like, for him to cry, something needs to really rock his boat (like Logan getting traded), sooooo... I made him sick. Sorry, Harzy, I guess. He is not very good at being sick.
Enjooooy!!!! All credits to @lumosinlove <3
Mid-April 2019
The bar was a bit loud, Logan thought, even for a Friday night. There was a rowdy group of people on the other side of the room, and the bass of whatever was on the jukebox was pounding in his skull, making his jaw tingle. It was a rare Friday night out, their last one before the playoffs, and Logan was committed to enjoying himself. He took a sip of his rum and coke, eyeing Leo where he was talking with Thomas and Remus over at a high top. His blonde curls were stuck with sweat to his forehead, his cheeks flushed in the same way they did on the ice, in the gym- in bed, Logan now knew.
Living with him and Finn was like living a dream every day of his life. While they couldn't be together in public quite yet, they could be together at home, in the apartment they shared that smelled like the three of them, with Leo's pristine kitchen and Finn's overflowing bookshelf. He scanned their corner, looking for a familiar shade of red, when he felt an arm come across his shoulders.
“Hey, you,” Finn said. His gesture was platonic, but he said everything Logan needed to know with his eyes. The corners of which, Logan noticed, were a bit strained. “How we doing?”
Logan nodded, brow furrowed. “Good. Rouge, you okay?”
Finn bit the inside of his cheek, gripping Logan's shoulder harder. “Yeah, feeling- feeling a bit dizzy, though.”
Logan turned, grabbing Finn's biceps to get a good look at him. “Merde, rouge, you're pale.”
Finn winked, but it wasn't convincing. “You already knew that, Lo.”
Logan made a noise in his throat. “Non, you're really pale.” He pressed his palm to Finn's forehead. “And hot, fuck. You have a fever.”
“No, I'm fine, I-”
“Non, Fish, we've gotta go home.” He turned to face away briefly. “Leo!”
Leo turned abruptly, his bright smile falling as he saw Logan's expression. He excused himself, then came over hurriedly. “What's wrong?”
Logan stepped aside to allow him to look at Finn. “Rouge has a fever.”
Leo immediately put his own palm to Finn's forehead, wincing as their skin connected. “Shit, Harz, you're burning. Does your stomach hurt?””
Finn rolled his eyes. “Only a little-”
“What'd you have to drink? Did you eat anything funny?”
Finn huffed. “I had one beer, and lunch at the rink and you cooked me dinner. I swear, I'm fine!”
Leo raised his eyebrows. “Spring flu is going around. Kuny was out with it last week, remember? We should go home.”
“But it's our last night out before the playoffs, and-”
“Ah,” Leo said, in a very good impression of his mother. “I don't want to hear it.” He took Finn under his arm and steered him towards the door. “Let's go. Time to go home.”
They called out their goodbyes over their shoulders, Remus narrowing his eyes, concerned. “All good?”
Logan shrugged. “Rouge doesn't feel so good. We're taking him home.”
“Let me and Coach know, okay Tremz? Trainer's orders.”
Logan smiled. “Ouais, promise.” He clapped Remus on the back. “Night, Loops.”
“Drive safe.”
They walked out to the car, Leo reaching into Finn’s front pocket to get the keys. Finn huffed out a sigh but dutifully sat himself in the backseat, head lolling to lean against the cool window. Logan furrowed his eyebrows at Leo from the passenger side, but Leo just shrugged. So he had no idea then, either.
They rode in silence, letting Finn rest his eyes, Leo with his hand on Logan's thigh and drumming with his fingers. Logan took his hand and played with the digits, eyes flashing to Finn in the side view mirror. His gray T-shirt was a little damp with sweat around the neckline and he looked uncomfortable. Logan frowned as Leo turned into their parking garage, the change in tempo rousing Finn from his sleep. He blinked, then winced, placing a hand on his stomach. Something was wrong.
As soon as Leo had the car in park, Logan hopped out to open Finn's door and give him a hand. Finn, despite being in obvious pain, attempted a smirk. “Chivalry is not dead after all.”
Logan just raised his eyebrows. Finn sighed, but took Logan's hand.
“When did you start feeling sick, honey?” Leo asked as they made their way to the elevator.
Finn's hand gripped Logan's hard. “I don't know, this afternoon? I felt a little dehydrated at practice this morning, I guess, but that was all before we took our nap after lunch.”
Leo bit the inside of his cheek as the door opened. “Come here. Let's go get a thermometer.”
Inside their apartment, Logan settled Finn on the couch and went to get him some water while Leo went to their bathroom. When he came back with a glass, Finn had slumped back into the cushions, breathing a little ragged. Leo put a hand on his forehead and coaxed him into opening his mouth, slipping the metal probe under his tongue. When it beeped, Leo squinted at the little screen and his eyes widened. “Shit, Fish.”
“Quoi?” Logan asked worriedly.
Leo turned the thermometer so he could see. “A hundred and two. Geez, Finn, that's high.”
Logan gripped Leo's forearm. “Hospital?”
Leo shook his head, placing a cooling hand on Finn's temple. “Not unless it lasts a few days, or gets to a hundred and three.” He kissed the skin just beside Finn's eye. “How you feeling, sweetheart?”
Finn groaned. “Sick. Feel really sick.” He curled around himself a bit. “Tummy hurts.”
“Okay,” Leo said. “I'll get you some ginger ale, some ibuprofen, and a pillow and blanket. Lo, can you take him to shower? I think he should sleep out here.”
Logan nodded, lifting Finn from under his arms. Finn whined out, but Logan gently shushed him as he guided him to their bathroom. He helped them both brush their teeth, then Finn shivered as Logan undressed him, his skin covered in goosebumps and a little sensitive.
“Rouge, hot or cold?”
“Hot,” Finn said. His brown eyes were a bit glassy. “Please.”
Logan got the shower up to temperature and helped Finn under the spray, immediately going to wash his sweaty hair and body. He wanted him in dry clothes and under blankets as soon as possible, and Finn didn't look like he could stand up much longer.
“Mon rouge,” Logan whispered, kissing his cheek. “What's wrong?”
Finn fell forward with his head on Logan's shoulder. “I feel so shit.”
Logan kissed his neck repeatedly, carding his fingers through his thick waves. “Why didn't you tell us?”
“Don't know,” Finn said, pressing harder into Logan's hold. “Didn't want to stop you from going out.”
Logan backed them out of the shower and wrapped Finn in a towel. “Non, you could never disappoint us.” He stood on his toes and kissed Finn's forehead firmly. “I would rather stay here with you than go out. Le, too.” Finn just nodded, obviously too tired to argue. Logan wrapped him up tighter in the towel and tugged him to their bedroom. He dressed them in boxers only before going back to the living room. “Le?”
“Here,” Leo said. He smiled gently, opening his arms for Finn to fall into. “Hi, sweetheart. Got you some ginger ale, okay? I'm going to go have a shower, then I'll sit here with you.”
Finn made an affirmative noise, and Logan watched as he let himself be tucked under the blankets Leo had put out, propped against a few spare pillows from their closet. Leo handed him a cup with a straw and kissed his forehead before turning to Logan.
“Ça va?” Logan asked as Leo cupped his jaw.
“Ouais,” Leo whispered. “I'll stay out with him for a while, okay, honey? You should get some sleep.”
Logan pinched his eyebrows together. “Non, je-”
Leo interrupted him with a kiss and a soft smile. “No, it's better if one of us sleeps. He'll need space to let the fever run its course, too, so we can't snuggle him on the couch anyways.” Leo shrugged. “Besides, it's not like I will sleep a lot regardless.” At Logan's noise of dissent, Leo laughed breathily and shushed him, pulling Logan closer. “One problem at a time, sweetheart.” He kissed Logan again and wrapped him in a hug. “Go say goodnight and go to bed, please. I love you.”
“Je t'aime.”
With a last peck, Leo walked to their bathroom. Logan sighed, watching his back for a brief moment before turning back to Finn, who was blinking up at him with big eyes. Logan knelt by his head, and brushed his hair out of his face. “Salut, mon rouge.”
“Mm,” Finn sighed. He closed his eyes and breathed heavily. “Love you.”
“I love you, I love you, I love you.”
Finn sighed again and then his breathing evened out. Logan kissed his temple in a lingering press of his lips before quietly standing and walking towards their bedroom. With a last look at Finn and at the bathroom door, he crawled into bed, big and lonely without either of his boys, and laid down to try and sleep.
***
“Okay, it's okay, honey. Let's go to the bathroom.”
Logan jerked awake at the sound of Leo's voice through their open bedroom doorway. He heard a thump, then two sets of footsteps, and a groan from Finn down the hallway. Logan sprung out of bed, jogging quickly to watch just in time as Finn threw up in the toilet.
“There you go, baby,” Leo said, rubbing a hand up and down Finn's sweaty back.
Finn reached up with a tired hand to flush the liquid away, head bent over the seat. He let out a groan and wilted a bit, Leo scooting behind him to support his weight with an arm around Finn's stomach. He was sweating profusely and shaking, face paler than it had been.
“Fuck,” Finn said.
“Oh, mon coeur.” Logan knelt beside them. “Feel better?”
Finn shook his head. “Uh uh.”
Logan tisked. “Want water?”
That made Finn gulp. “No. Gonna be sick again.”
“Shit,” Leo said. He reached another hand around to brush Finn's hair out of his eyes. “Don't try and force it down, honey, that'll make worse.”
And with that, Finn bent his head over the toilet once more as his stomach convulsed. “Ugh.”
Logan pressed the lever on the toilet this time, allowing Finn to sink back into Leo again.
“Okay?” Leo asked.
“No.” Finn's breath hitched. “Le.”
“Sh, sh, I know.” Leo adjusted them, bracketing Finn with his legs and allowing him to sit curled against his chest. He pressed a hard kiss to the side of Finn's head. “I know, it hurts. I think your fever is breaking at the same time. But it's okay, baby, we got you.”
Finn let out a noise and Logan realized he was crying. Logan reached out to rub his arm. “Rouge.”
“I'm sorry,” Finn said wetly. He peeked out at Logan with one teary eye. “I'm sorry, it just really hurts.”
“Sh, sh,” Leo said again. He brushed Finn's cheeks with his thumbs. “Don't be sorry, Fish. It sucks to be sick.”
“It's not just that,” Finn sniffled, tears now flowing freely down his freckles. “It-it's that I've been feeling like shit for hours, and my head hurts, and my stomach hurts, and we have the playoffs soon, and I ruined our night out-”
“Whoa,” Logan interrupted. He took one of Finn's hands and kissed it. “Mon amour, I told you that you didn't ruin anything.”
Leo turned to look at Finn, too. “You're worried about ruining our night out?”
Finn's bottom lip was poking out and quivering as he nodded. “Yeah.”
Leo let out an oh and wrapped him tighter in his arms. Finn clung to his biceps. “Oh, honey, no, you didn't ruin anything.” He tucked his nose into Finn's hair. “And in terms of the playoffs, we still have a few days. That means you can rest, it's probably just a stomach bug. You'll be good as new in no time, sweetheart.”
“Ouais, rouge,” Logan agreed. He leaned forward and kissed his cheek. “We just want you better.”
Finn groaned again. “I feel so sick.” He looked up at Leo. “I'm sorry, peanut, this is not-” His breath hitched with another round of tears. “This is not very sexy.”
Leo laughed, which just made Finn cry harder into his shoulder. He kissed Finn's head. “Oh, sweetheart, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I laughed, it's not funny.”
“No it's not.”
Leo wrapped him up fully. “It's not very sexy, no. But I love you.”
Finn let out a strangled noise, then abruptly turn his wet face around and threw up another time into the basin. He moaned. “I just want to be better.”
Leo supported him still with a hand low on his stomach and Logan rubbed his back. “I know, mon chou,” Logan said.
“It still hurts, why does it still hurt?” Finn cried, before vomiting once more.
“Geez,” Leo said. “You think that's all?”
“Ugh,” Finn groaned. He flushed a final time, then fell back, letting out an oof and a sniffle. “I think so. I still feel really sick.”
Logan clucked his tongue and pressed his hand to Finn's forehead. “Still warm, rouge.”
“Why don't you brush your teeth, honey,” Leo said, rubbing his hands up and down Finn's heaving ribs. “I'll get you some ginger ale again.”
Finn wiped his eyes. “Yeah, okay. Thank you.”
Leo kissed his cheek, then lifted Finn under his arms to help him stand. Logan took his weight, then Leo was gone back to the kitchen, and the two of them were stood in front of the mirror. Logan rested his lips to Finn’s shoulder and played with his fingers while Finn brushed his teeth. He had a bit more color, but was still sweaty and shaky.
“Are you cold, mon amour?” Logan asked once Finn was done rinsing his mouth.
Finn touched their foreheads together. “I don't know. Now I am, but on the couch I was hot.”
“It's the fever,” Leo said as he appeared in the doorway. “I think it's still breaking.” He winced. “Not ideal when you're also throwing up.”
Finn took the ginger ale. “Thank you, peanut.”
“You're welcome, sweetheart.”
“Allez,” Logan said. “Let's go sit.” He kissed Finn's wet cheek, then Leo's. “We can sleep.”
Leo pursed his lips. “But we can't-”
Logan kissed him on the mouth. “I'll hold you in the chair so you can sleep, mon coeur. Then Finn has his own space, but we can be there.”
Leo traced a finger down his cheek, then kissed his nose. “Okay.” He turned to Finn. “Sound good?”
To their surprise, Finn grin and winked. “Got my own nursing staff.”
Logan rolled his eyes. “Merde. Only you say dirty things while sick.”
Finn huffed out a chuckle, but wobbled a bit, spilling some ginger ale. “Whoops.”
Leo sighed, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. “Come on, sweetheart. Bed time.”
Logan let Leo tuck Finn in while he went to get more pillows and blankets. After they each gave Finn a kiss on the forehead, Logan sat in their leather chair and reclined it, pulling the lever for the foot rest. He fluffed a pillow behind him and opened his arm with a look to Leo. “Ici, soleil.”
Leo climbed in gingerly, careful not to put too much weight on the footrest, then settled onto Logan's chest with a sigh. His feet hung off the end, but he didn't seem to care. Logan tugged the blanket over both of them. “Ça va?”
Leo nodded into his chest and kissed his collarbone. “You sure you'll be able to sleep like this?”
“Of course,” Logan said. He squeezed Leo to him. “With you, always.”
“Mm.” Leo shifted slightly, burrowing his nose into Logan's neck and peeking out at Finn's sleeping form. “Hope he's okay.”
“I'm sure he will be, soleil.” Logan kissed his forehead softly. “Je t'aime.”
“Love you,” Leo said. He yawned, making his face look like that of a puppy, and Logan pinched his button nose as it scrunched up. “Hey.”
Logan nuzzled their noses together and kissed his lips lightly. “Love you, love you, love you.” He sighed. “Bonne nuit, mon amour.”
Leo let out a breath, and between one moment and the next, they were both asleep.
***
Mid-March 2019
Logan’s hands shook slightly as he held his cell phone, his mother’s contact staring up at him. It was a picture of the two of them in Nice during the summer when Logan had been about seven. He was wet and sandy, his hair short and spiky like he'd liked at that age. He and his maman were both facing the camera, his skinny arms reaching up to wrap around her neck. He'd always loved physical affection, and was a frequent snuggler with all his family members, but with his mother especially when he was younger. They were both laughing in the photo. The fading sunset reflected against his mother’s dark hair and made her skin golden. Logan thumbed over her face- he had her eyes.
“Fuck,” he whispered, dropping his cell phone on Leo and Finn’s apartment floor. “Merde.”
“Lo?” came Leo's voice from the bedroom. He stepped out, curls damp from their post-run shower and in shorts and Finn's sweatshirt. “You okay?”
Logan just looked at him. Leo made a soft noise, coming over to the couch and tucking Logan under his arm. Logan pulled the Saints sweatshirt sleeves over his hands and snuggled into Leo's side.
“What's wrong?” Leo asked in French.
“I can't do it.”
“What can't you do?”
“Call my parents.”
Leo looked down at him, brow furrowed. “What?”
Logan sighed. “I want to tell them. About us.”
Leo pulled him closer, dipping his nose into Logan's hair. “You don't have to do anything you don't want, d'accord? I haven't said anything to my mama and dad yet, either. That's for after you move in.”
“Je sais,” Logan whispered. “I just- I can't keep it in anymore.” He carded his hands through Leo's hair. “My sisters know, and Finn's family knows, and I can't keep it in any longer.” He pulled Leo down for a kiss. “I want to tell them about you.”
Leo's eyes widened slightly. “Me?”
Logan nodded firmly. “Ouais. They won't be surprised by Finn.” He kissed Leo again. “I want to tell them about you, too. You're so amazing, mon coeur.”
Leo smiled against his mouth. “I like it when you say things like that.”
“Quoi?”
“When you tell us, directly, what you want from us, what you like about us.”
Logan smiled back. “I do like you.”
“I sure hope so.” Leo kissed him once more. “I'm sure it'll be okay, Lo. Your mother already loves me.”
Logan snorted. “All mothers love you.”
Leo shrugged. “It's my disposition.” He nuzzled their noses. “But I know it's scary.”
Reality came crashing back in. Logan bit his lip, staring down at his phone on the hardwood. “It's just…” He looked back up to Leo. “What if they don't love me anymore?”
Leo looked alarmed. “What?”
Tears pressed at the edge of his vision. “They didn't ask for this. And it- it will make their life harder, and I don't want that.”
Leo pulled back to sit up straight, and Logan felt cold. “Their life harder? Sweetheart, it's about you. It's about us, and I- what matters is Finn loves you, and I-”
Logan's heart jolted. They hadn't said that to each other yet.
Leo shook his head. “I'm here for you. I want you, Lo. That's what matters. Are you- are you sure you want to do this?”
Logan sucked in an alarmed breath, meeting Leo's eyes. “Mon coeur, I want you more than anything. And I'm- I'm not ashamed, I'm just…” His voice felt weak. He blinked and tears fell.“I'm scared.”
Leo deflated. “Oh, honey.” He wrapped Logan up close, and Logan let out a sob into his chest. “Sh, sh, it's okay. It's okay, sweetheart, it's- Finn!”
“Yeah?”
“Can you come here, please?”
Finn also appeared from the bedroom, grinning and freshly showered like Logan and Leo and in Logan's high school hockey sweatshirt and boxers. “What's-” His face fell. “Shit.” He hurried over to kneel in front of them and cupped Logan's calves. “Baby, what happened?”
Logan tried to answer, but his voice caught, and he turned to bury his face into Leo's forearm.
That made Finn more alarmed, eyes wide. “Logan, Lo, baby, what's going on?” He looked to Leo. “Peanut?”
Leo's voice was tight as he spoke. “He- he tried to call his maman. To tell his parents about… well…”
“Us?”
“Yeah.”
Finn ran his hands up and down Logan's thighs. Logan peeked out through his eyelashes, expecting some sort of panic or frustration, but all he caught a glimpse of was Finn's soft gaze before he pressed a kiss to Logan's forehead. “Oh, baby. I'm so sorry.” He brushed Logan's hair out of is eyes. “Are you nervous?”
“Ouais,” Logan said hoarsely. He leaned into the touch of Finn's hands. “Ouais, I'm nervous.”
Finn hauled himself up to Logan's other side, an arm thrown over Logan’s torso, gripping Leo's where they criss-crossed. “How about we stay with you when you call them, baby? We're right here.”
“He's right,” Leo agreed. He kissed Logan's head. “We’re always right here, sweetheart.”
Finn dipped to whisper in his ear. “Love you.”
Logan kissed his cheek, then Leo's, and bent to pick up his phone. He unlocked it, still on his mother's contact. Leo gave him an encouraging smile, Finn a small squeeze, and he took a deep breath. His mother picked up on the second ring.
“Salut, mon ange! Ça va?”
“Ouais, maman,” he sighed. “Ça va.” He took a look at Finn. He'd probably be itching to know what they were saying, but Logan needed to speak French if he was going to get through this conversation. He'd tell him after. “I have something to tell you. Is dad there?”
He could imagine his mother's eyebrows, dark and full, furrowed in worry. “Is everything okay?”
“Ouais, it's good news. I hope it's good news.”
“Give me a moment, sweetheart. Marius!” A beat of silence. “It's Logan!” There was some rustling, then her voice sounded far away. “You're on speaker phone.”
“Salut, Lolo,” his dad said. “All good?”
Logan took a deep breath. He reached up to take Leo's hand that was pressed over his heart and squeezed. “I have- I have something to tell you.”
“What is it?” His father's voice sounded worried.
He looked to Finn, who thumbed his damp cheek. “I-I'm seeing someone.” He turned to Leo, who was watching him with soft blue eyes. “Someones.”
“Quoi?” his mother asked. “What do you mean-”
“It’s Finn and Leo. Both. Both of them.”
He heard two sharp inhales, then a soft noise from his dad. “Oh, Logan…”
“Ouais,” Logan said. He was crying again. “I-I'm so sorry, I-”
“Now what would you have to be sorry for?” Iva said. She laughed, and it was teary. “You've been in love with Finn since the first day you met him. And Leo… well, he's so good to you, I adore him.”
Despite it all, that made Logan laugh. “That's what he said.”
He could imagine her smile. “It's true. He's an angel.”
“Ouais, he is.” He bounced his leg nervously. “Papa?”
“Sorry,” his dad said gruffly. “I'm just- I'm so proud of you, mon fil.” His voice made Logan cry all over again. “We love you so much.”
“I love you,” Logan replied.
“Do you love them?”
His father's question made Logan jerk his head up. First, he found Finn's eyes, loving and caring, almost jewel-like. Then he turned to Leo. He and Finn had a plan to tell him they loved him, and while it hadn't been said out loud, Logan already felt it deep within his bones. He may have fallen in love with Finn O'Hara years ago, in a shit-hole Harvard frat house, but he fell in love with Leo Knut the first time Leo had ordered them both sundaes and tea on the road, when they had talked about missing home and Logan, missing Finn like an ache even if he was right in front of him, had for the first time in a while felt a sense of peace, of home, in Leo’s blue eyes. They knew him wholly, completely, without so much as uttering a word, and Logan never felt more seen than when he was in Leo's arms.
“Ouais,” he said to his parents. “I do.”
“Are you happy?”
“Ouais. I'm so happy.”
“Then that's all we could ever ask for,” his father replied.
“Thank you for telling us, sweetheart.”
“Ouais, maman. Thank you for listening.” He took a shaky breath. “And- the team knows, and the girls know, but we're… we're not ready for it to be public yet.”
He could imagine his mother shaking her head gently. “Whenever you're ready, Lolo. We'll be right here for you.”
“We love you,” his father said. “Bonne nuit, mon ange.”
“Bonne nuit.”
Logan ended the call, staring at his phone for a second before bursting into tears.
“Sh, sh, honey, it's okay,” Leo hushed. He cradled Logan to his chest. “It's going to all be okay.”
“Non, non,” Logan said. He sat up, wiping his eyes. “They're okay. They're okay with it.”
Finn's wide grin filled his vision. “That's so great, baby.” He cupped Logan's cheek and kissed him hard. “What'd you tell them?”
Logan sniffled. “That, um. That we are together and that- that the world doesn't know yet, but the team does, and that-” He looked into Finn's eyes. His own welled up again, and he blinked a few tears down his cheeks. “That I'm happy.” He turned and kissed Leo. “We're happy.”
Leo smiled against his lips. “The happiest.”
Logan flopped back against him and opened his arms for Finn to give him a hug. “Can I stay here tonight?”
Finn kissed his cheek. “Of course you can. You're moving in in a few weeks.”
Logan groaned. “But that's so far away.”
“It's the best time for it, sweetheart,” Leo said, pulling Logan slightly into his lap. “We've got two days off after the regular season ends.” He made a raspberry noise against Logan's neck, making Logan giggle. “Plus, we need to give the Dumais kids some time to process.”
Finn whistled lowly under his breath. “Yikes, yeah. We're gonna be public enemy number one after stealing their Frenchie from them.”
Logan hit the back of his head lightly, then pulled him in for a kiss. “Don't talk about my children that way.”
Leo snorted. “They're not yours.”
“Katie is.”
“Well, fine, fine,” Leo sighed. He gave Logan's temple one last kiss before moving to stand. “I'm starving after that run. How about some burritos? I've got some meat, and I can make spicy rice and pico and guac.”
Logan smiled as he shifted over to let Leo out. “Merci, soleil.”
Leo kissed them each on the lips briefly before sauntering into the kitchen, whistling. Logan watched Finn’s eyes follow him. When he turned back to Logan, he smiled widely. “Hi, baby-baby. Feel better?”
Logan nodded, but he remained serious. He brought their faces closer. “I love you.” He played with Finn's hair briefly. “The day I move in I want to tell Leo we love him,” he whispered.
Finn's smile grew so big it scrunched his nose and the corners of his eyes. “Yeah?”
Logan smiled, too. “Ouais.”
Finn wiggled excitedly. “Yay. Yay, yay, yay!” he whisper-shouted. “We can get that cake he likes from down the road, and we can light candles, and I'll put on that jazz record-”
Logan kissed him, unable to direct his eagerness anywhere else. He was flushed with just the thought. “Ouais, yes, yes, yes.”
Finn just laughed and leaned into kiss Logan once more.
***
End of March, 2019 (this takes place after Ch. 17 of SW)
Lorgan sat down on one of the kitchen barstools heavily with a sigh. He loved team dinners, he loved the Dumais, but he did like coming home to his own space. Or, not his own space but his-and-Finn's-and-Leo's space. An adult space. A home, one that they were making together.
It had been only a few days since moving in, a few days since telling Leo he loved him (We, he could hear Finn's voice say. We told him we love him.), and already he couldn't imagine existing in the same space as anyone else. It was bliss, it was home, it was love and pleasure so heady that Logan almost couldn't contain his joy and neediness. In fact, that seemed like a pretty good idea. Finn was in the shower; Leo was texting his parents, but maybe Logan could drag him away with a few kisses and join Finn underneath the spray, all steamy and glistening, and-
Logan sucked in a breath, already hot at the thought, and went to their bedroom.
He put on a smile, biting his lip in a way he hoped was sexy enough for Leo to want to kiss him (not that it was hard), and leaned against the bedroom door. Leo was sat on the mattress, all tall and nicely dressed from dinner, and looking intently at his phone.
Logan wanted to kiss him so badly. “Le?”
“Hm?” When Leo looked up, his eyes were wet and his face flushed.
Logan stiffened and pushed off the wall. “Merde,” he said. He went to stand in between Leo’s legs and cupped his round face. “Peanut, what's wrong?”
Leo blinked, pulling back to wipe at his face. “Sorry. Sorry, sweetheart, I'm okay.”
“Non,” Logan protested gently. Leo watched him as he walked around to the other side of the bed and crawled over to settle against the pillows by Leo's left side. He sat up, stretched out his arm, and tugged Leo until he fell against his chest. “Mon soleil, can you tell me?”
Leo swung his legs onto the bed to lie down fully, bringing a hand up to hold Logan's bicep. “I watched Sirius’ interview. From the game.”
“Okay,” Logan whispered into his hair. He kissed Leo's temple, letting him collect his thoughts.
“What he said,” Leo continued. “About- about loving the game and finding someone who allowed him to love the game and love outside of the game. About Remus, it- I don't know, it just made me sad.”
Logan made a noise of dissent and squeezed Leo harder. “Why would it make you sad, mon coeur?”
Leo’s breath was shaky. “Because it- because so many people reacted so horribly, and now all he does is answer questions about it. I'm- I'm so proud of them, and so grateful that there are openly gay people in hockey, but it-” Leo's voice turned high pitched, and Logan felt as his body hitched with a sob.
“Mon soleil,” Logan whispered, hugging Leo tightly. “Sh, c'est bien, I've got you.”
“Nobody should have to do that,” Leo cried softly. “I don't want to do that.”
Logan felt his heart break and his body stiffen. He knew Leo wasn't shy about his identity, not in the way Logan was. They were still figuring this dynamic out, the three of them, and had agreed to wait a while, but Logan couldn't help but wonder if Leo would have chosen to have done something differently if he hadn't gotten together with the two of them. If he would have already come out, however subtly.
Finn chose that moment to walk through the door, a towel hanging from his hips. He entered with his usual swagger, but stopped upon seeing Logan and Leo. “Shit,” he said. “Give me two seconds.”
He threw the towel on the floor and rummaged quickly for a pair of boxers, then came to lie beside them on the bed. “What's happening? Leo, what's wrong?”
Leo sniffled, leaning into Finn's hand that was smoothing back his hair. “I watched Sirius’ interview. After the game.” A few more tears fell down his cheek and Finn wiped them away. “I don't like watching him have to defend himself and Remus, or- or just answer questions about it.” He ducked down into Logan's chest. “He's good at hockey. People seem to forget that now, sometimes.”
Finn glanced at Logan with knowing eyes, then looked back down to Leo. “Do you- do you think about that, sweetheart? Having to answer questions about it?”
Leo nodded, his eyes welling up again. “Mmhm.” He snuggled closer in Logan's arms. “I'm not ashamed of who I am. I just wish that it wasn't a given that I'll have to talk to reporters about it. To defend it.” His lips wobbled a bit. “I'm good at hockey.”
Finn bent his head to press kisses to Leo's cheeks. “You're so good, nutter butter,” he whispered. “And you're so beautiful, and gentle, and kind.” Every descriptor seemed to make Leo cry harder, but Finn just kissed the tears away. “You're so much more than just your sexuality, baby. And you're everything to us. Right, Lo?”
Logan nodded hurriedly, kissing Leo's head repeatedly. “Ouais, mon soleil. We meant it when we said we loved you. You're everything.”
Finn made a noise in agreement. “We love you so much. We talk about it all the time.”
“You do?” Leo asked, almost timid.
Finn kissed him slowly. “Of course we do. And we will only come out whenever we are all ready. And we will do it in such a way that we avoid as much questioning as possible.” He had a fierce glint in his eye. “I will defend you both if I have to, but I will not let anyone tell me loving you is wrong.” He looked between them both. “It is the most right thing that I've ever felt.”
Leo nodded against Logan's chest and Logan held him tighter. It wasn't often that he was the one holding one of his boys like this, and he loved the weight of Leo's body on top of his. He vowed to do it more often.
“I love you,” Leo whispered tearily “I love you so much.”
“Love you,” Logan said, kissing Leo's temple in bursts. “Love you, love you, love you. Now, soleil-” He sat up slightly, jostling Leo a little bit. “-I was going to come in here and ask to go give rouge a sexy surprise in the shower-”
Finn's eyebrows shot up.
Logan rolled his eyes playfully. “-but I think it's best we go to bed.” He tilted Leo's face to the side to kiss him lightly. “Let's take a shower. I want to wash the day off of me, then we can cuddle.”
Leo bit his lip around a small smile. His eyes were still a bit wet, but the tears made his baby blues crystal clear. “I could be persuaded into a sexy surprise.”
Logan felt heat stir in his belly. “Ouais?”
Leo nodded. “Ouais. It makes me all hot when you tell me you love me.” He made to sit up, then turned to Finn and winked. “We'll be right back, sweetheart.”
“Fuck that,’ Finn blurted out. He shot up and scurried around the bed, grasping Leo by the hips and kissing him as he nudged him out through the doorway. “I'm joining.”
Leo laughed in between the wet kisses Finn was pressing to his mouth. “You just- hm, Finn- you just showered, honey.”
“I literally said I don't care. I'll shower after, if you want, too. Just no sexy showering without me.” Finn held out a hand to Logan. “Chop chop, Tremblay, sexy shower time.”
Logan shook his head fondly and flushed, allowing himself to be pulled off the bed, pulled out of their bedroom, pulled out of his clothes, pulled into the steamy shower, and pulled off the edge, in free-fall and forever- forever- in love. This, he thought as his boyfriends’ bodies blanketed his own, their laughs in his ear and their mouths against his skin, was what a home should feel like.
#lumosinlove#finn o'hara#leo knut#logan tremblay#o'knutzy#sweater weather#vaincre#coast to coast#lgbtqia#love#leo is a *nurse* angel and a *comforting* angel and a *comforted* angel- he's multi-faceted#finn literally running a fever: 'no i'm fine!' 😠🤒 then he's taken care of and he is like 'sexy nurse bfs yes plz i <3 them so gorge' 😙#brave logan tremblay has a special place in my heart he is so full of love and i feel like we need to recognize that more#like YES he is a bit needy sometimes BUT#he puts in so much effort and loves his boys so hard he is an active participant in their relationship he can be both plz and thx#sick fic#comfort#hockey boys#coming out
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/07d0bd19c26f9ab8d2e0116e5662ef01/3b11923a6172af8c-81/s540x810/ccfc01e4802ad35b9b6ccfad4522eb5192051803.jpg)
You'll never convince me that she doesn't completely adore this man.
#quiet love is still valid in this house#francesca stirling#john stirling#francesca bridgerton#bridgerton#he's already been so good for her in so many ways#their relationship isn't bodice rippingly intense but it doesn't need to be#francesca experiencing both kinds of love in her lifetime just makes her more multi-faceted#also i'm going to miss john he's so so so sweet#michaela will be that passionate love that the show thrives on but they will probably have less in common and more friction#which is also *chef's kiss*
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im actually going to tear into totk’s dragon’s tears/ memories rn bc i remember feeling distinctly unsatisfied with them when i got all of them so im just going to write some general bullet points about them, about what i dislike or maybe what i do actually like about them, leaving out both master sword scenes and the mummydorf one because i’m here to talk about the stuff in the past not that
- off the bat (i play this game in english btw so all of this is based on the english text and translation i am aware some stuff is slightly different in other languages) im not really a fan of how the descriptions of all of the tears is just a literal description of what happens?? i think my issue with it is that some of the text is a little bit too in depth, as in it just tells you literally everything about the scene. this might be nitpick-y but i personally dont like it
- what’s up with zelda saying ‘but that must mean...!’ at the end of the scene. is it suggesting that she’s made the realization that rauru and sonia are the first king and queen of hyrule? because they literally tell her that like ten seconds before. i guess it’s suggesting she’s realizing she’s in the past but... idk the texts says ‘she’s left startled by a suspicion that she’s heard those names before’ yeah theyre the first king and queen of hyrule?? they tell her that. they tell her their names and that they are the first leaders of hyrule is she just now connecting the dots that she’s in the past? that’s what the next cutscene implies. but all of the surrounding dialogue and the description don’t suggest that that’s what she’s realizing i feel like this was kind of muddled in the translation
- why did sonia elbow rauru he was just standing weird he didnt say anything this isnt a nitpick im just confused. is it because he’s not being very empathetic towards what zelda’s going through? she elbows him and then she goes and talks to zelda why even elbow rauru. ordinarily you elbow someone like that if you mean for them to go do something why elbow someone if you’re going to do the thing you want anyways
- why doesnt zelda offer to help with the purah pad or anything like that. what happened to her sheikah tech fascination from botw. not even as someone actually familiar with the technology who could give mineru some points as to how it works
- what are sonia and zelda doing behind rauru when he shoots that insane fucking beam at the mulduga swarm they’re clearly doing something with their stones but like... are they amplifying rauru’s power somehow?? what do time powers have to do with the beam of light i dont- what were they doing please the text description only mentions him using his powers so are sonia and zelda just... supporting his powers? idk man
- dragon tear #5 is a whole can of worms with its worse-than-oot reenactment of that one scene from oot. why the focus on sonia and her tear btw. i mean yeah she dies to motivate rauru and zelda but like. why not aim for the new girl who probably doesn’t know how to use it as much and is probably more likely to be separate from the king who can shot insane lasers. im really not a fan of this scene for how strongly the game sides with rauru and zelda being passive and judgemental but ganondorf is literally the best part of it there’s a lot of character in just how he picks up his sword and stands up to leave
- putting memories 6 and 7 together just because of how there was just. no fucking care put into the idea of zelda learning to use her time powers. memory 6 zelda talks about wanting to use her time powers and sonia gives her tips on how she could use it and visualize the use of it and then in memory 7 she can just use it perfectly with great control and timing. why even bother talking about her nothing yet understanding how to use it when the very next scene she just uses it like it’s nothing. how much time has passed we get nothing to show us zelda trying to practice this power just. nope. she’s good she can use it perfectly. also more awkward dialogue sonia saying ‘what a picture zelda paints of him’ as she is. looking directly at zelda. change the line to like, ‘what a picture you paint of him’ she is literally looking right at zelda so why would she say it like that
- generally i feel like memory six should have been before 4 and 5 (4 being where she uses some power to... support??? rauru and it being before memory 5 so that there isnt this weird break in between the memories concerning ganondorf.) memory 6 does not have anything to do with memory 4 or 5 so just put it earlier so there isnt a weird shift in focus between the two big ganondorf scenes
- good god they introduce the idea of sonia and zelda being aware of ganondorf using a fake zelda but theres literally nothing about it having been a problem or them having experience or like. anything. they just TELL you that they know and suggest that it’s been like. a thing for a bit??? also obligatory ganondorf’s face model rigging is fucked comment he’s still the best part
- the pacing of these memories is just weird in general, memories 7 and 8 being separate but the same scene is strange when other memories are long as fuck but cover one event each, plus theres clearly barely any passage of time between memories 7 and 8 it almost feels like they were split up to fill space or just because otherwise it’d be... too long? man idk
- ‘queen sonia needs you!’ girl she is DEAD good fucking luck doing anything to help her
- ganondorf’s horse and its armor both look sick as fuck i really wish you got to see more of it outside the memory it appears in
- everything about the original sages honestly sucks. they aren’t characters they’re just walking macguffins. they have no names and are not relevant or mentioned or make any appearance until they are needed by the story. why does the zora sage talk about getting word about the attacked gerudo village in this scene when like. they’ve all met up and have clearly. been together for a bit. when she gives them the news it’s clearly the first they’ve heard of it... but... why would she wait until this moments to give this info unless for the benefit of the player watching the scene. why does the ZORA sage have this news and not... the gerudo sage?? what’s with the masks. they’re all made of zonaite or whatever sure theyre gifts from rauru but like. i hate that it kind of denotes them being subservient and lower than him and the zonai. honestly i really hate this scene in general mostly because of the uncomfortable showing of how rauru absolutely holds power over them and despite them being leaders as well they are expected to be wholly blindly loyal to him. rauru only gives them these stones when he needs their aid and they swear loyalty too him soon after but you also see that sonia and mineru have stones, too, so they’re clearly withholding these things despite it being kind of reasonable for him to give each race their own secret stone as further proof of their pact? there is so much shit to be said about the imperialistic themes or whatever in this fucking story and i really hate it
- i do kinda like how the next scene shows you that the one rock in the corner of that first hidden room in the forgotten temple is sonia’s grave
- zelda’s phrasing and description of how she and link found ganondorf is weird to me ‘he’s still alive’ ‘he lives on’ girl that was a mummy. he was not moving until you got there. he’s undead at best as far as you know. this is def a nitpick but eh. also the reliance on link is a... bit odd when zelda does not actually know that link is safe until she gets the master sword. its fine but still. also her shell-shocked expression after rauru talks about her being in the past for a reason is a bit... it doesn’t fit her emotion it’s kind of similar to the expression she had when sonia was killed
- the memory about the imprisoning war starts with practically the whole story up until now being repeated back to you by mineru with a decent amount of bias on mineru’s part and while it’s fine because of some of the extra stuff you learn but it does a lot more telling rather than showing when it comes to the actual imprisoning war and... idk the whole thing about their ‘fight’ kind of falls flat when you don’t actually see any fighting you just see that the sages have gotten their asses beat. i think it would have been a little interesting if in the god-awful repetitive sage-awakening scenes they had actually showed you the og sages fighting ganondorf instead of just. slow-mo freeze-frames for whatever. once again ganondorf if the best part of the scene
- the rest of the memories are fine idc
i get the feeling that the japanese-to-english translation was either all-around rough or somehow rushed, because some of the phrases in the game as well as some of the dialogue is really awkward and... could have been better. i don’t know how it works but it feels like a lot of it was very literal, direct translation and no one at noa thought that it ought to be tweaked just a little bit
these memories also do a fuck-ton of telling rather than showing and it really is like they don’t really trust you to connect the dots, and some of it does come off like they either didn’t want to make more memories or ran out of time or something. i felt like the memory of ganondorf just summoning his monsters and riding on his cool horse could have been a bit longer to actually show us the forces of hyrule fighting him and having a hard time with it
a lot of the character animations doesn’t have a whole lot of personality to them, ganondorf is the character who had the most distinct and interesting movements. rauru and sonia had their... singular movement (rauru putting a hand to his chin and sonia taking zelda’s hands) and zelda was kind of just... standing around and reacting to stuff, and neither mineru nor any of the other sages had any really interesting animations asides from mineru’s coughing fit in memory 16 (plus her reclining chair that was a nice touch). very few of their movements really express anything about the characters besides some really baseline values or traits.
the ordering of some memories is kind of odd, the excessive flashbacks in memory 17 are a bit much, the telling rather than showing, the sometimes awkward dialogue, a lot of the scenes are characters just... talking at each other, you don’t actually see very much of hyrule in the past or any characters beyond the main four, and it really did nothing to actually get me to care about these characters at all.
tldr i dont like totk’s dragon tears
#i didnt want to revisit this game but the memories in totk bother me. once im done with this tho i can go read my new volumes of berserk#salty talks#loz#legend of zelda#totk#literally the narrative of this game dragged the rest of the game through mud for me so im going to complain abt it more#any time i wanted to rewatch a part of a scene i have to sit through a few minutes of bullshit just to get to the point.#these things are so long and barely anything happens in them#half of these cutscenes are just characters standing around and talking theres so little actual character to most of the character movements#ganondorf has the most emotive and distinct movements in all of these scenes#they have the most personality and you get the most variety. with rauru and sonia its just. shes gentle n motherly hes uhhhh arrogant king#honest to god. i miss linebeck. i miss the way he was animated and the sheer amount of personality they gave him in every cutscene#fuck man i miss botw's memories. despite them being shorter (i'm pretty sure) i feel like there was more essence to them. more character#listen. i understand that gamedev is hard and so is writing and animating but like. this game is seventy fucking dollars.#despite him being so disappointingly one-note. ganondorf was the most interesting fucking character in these memories#finding the dragon's tears was fun but actually watching them was lame af#hey remember those posts i made about ph's cutscenes? maybe its the autism but i feel like i couldnt write those paragraphs abt totk#ig just. ph is my special interest and i have a negative bias against totk. if you think im dead wrong about this stuff go ahead.#i dont blame anyone for taking my words with a grain of salt. come to your own conclusions. if oyu like totk's memories cool!#anyways im done bye im gonna read berserk. which actually has a nuanced story and world and characters and a multi-faceted villain#totk spoilers#bitching abt totk
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uh-oh she's gushing about shinon again and it's super long
So you guys know I love Shinaff. BUT!!! I would like to explain to you part of how that came to be, i.e. how Janaff's supports with Shinon were both different and important!!! In other words, a direct exploration of his development involving laguz and how he's turning out for the better post Janaff A support and RD (and how it makes the most sense to have their A support slotted between the beginning of PoR and the end of RD for a full progression of his development)!
First of all, Shinon only has three supports; so unlike most characters, every line counts and needs to hold more weight to his conversations.
Rolf and Gatrie's supports portray different sides of him: the mentor and the friend. What we see in these supports is stuff we essentially already knew about him, but we're given more depth. The thing to note here is, again, we already knew these things about him. This is the man we started with.
What we don't get in these supports is proper development. Janaff is the only support he has that gives him that. Janaff's supports with him are the only ones that gives him any self reflection and improvement. This isn't necessarily a bad thing for the other supports, but it's more that it props up these ones a little bit more.
Also, when you get to RD, Shinon comes off as though he's already gotten this development. He feels like he's grown as a person. While that makes sense, from a player's perspective, we didn't really see that development in him (like we would have with characters like Ike, Mist, Soren, etc)... unless you supported him with Janaff.
In RD, Shinon has Gatrie and Rolf as bonded by defaults. These are basically internal bonds in RD - ones that aren't needed by supports. You can carry over support data from PoR to RD, and characters will receive a bond with the character they A supported. For some, like Ranulf and Ike, these bonds will be there regardless of if they got an A support.
That means that even without supporting them in PoR, Shinon will bonded to these two by default. Janaff is his only other support, so if they reach an A support and that data is carried over to RD, he now has his full list of supports bonded to him. Mind you, that's a liiittle bit of a big deal (and kinda cool to me!) as nobody else can do that (or almost nobody, since I'm not totally positive what Stefan and Volke's situations are and would have to check on that in my game, as the only other characters with an extremely low amount of supports).
So why do I say that's important? Because the only character he won't have by default as a bond is Janaff. You have to go out of your way to get their support bond (and when I say out of your way, I mean it pretty literally if you don't normally use one or both of them, due to how PoR's support system works). Janaff is the only character Shinon has to build up a bond with from scratch, which is something the player has to decide to do.
Gatrie and Rolf are the base - the bare minimum. It's given to you, no questions asked. Shinon doesn't have to develop as a person to have those bonds. When Janaff arrives in 3-7, if they were A supported in PoR (and your data was carried over), he and Shinon automatically have their bond show up in the bond list on each of their profiles as of the turn Janaff is on the map. This also means they can get a double A support, which is, again, something Shinon has very few options for.
Without Janaff, Shinon doesn't get that extremely direct development. In RD it's assumed all the characters had development of some sort (example, Shinon is much more chilled out and takes a much more active role in watching out for the GMs and making sure they're properly funded). However, with the way Shinon's development toward laguz went, you'd think something must have happened for him to change his mind.
However, it's an uncontestable fact that Ike stated everyone in the GMs decided to stay knowing full well they'd be fighting for the Laguz Alliance:
"I told the others they could leave if they didn’t want to work with laguz, but everybody decided they’d rather stay. Don’t worry about it, Ranulf."
If they didn't want to work with laguz (Shinon and Soren would be the primary candidates he brought this up for), they didn't have to go. They didn't have to take part. They didn't have to be there. Shinon decided to stay despite fully aware they would be the only beorc there. That's development already... but if he supported Janaff, it starts to make more sense and feels like a proper linear path for his development.
"But DCB, he was racist toward Lyre!" Sure! He's not perfect and there's still room for growth. In fact, Shinon started out calling her a sub-human but referred to her as a laguz when Gatrie was the only one left to hear him, so he either:
is trying to keep up appearances in front of laguz he doesn't like, using sub-human to their face but not using that term in private anymore (or to laguz he doesn't hate, i.e. Janaff in their A support where he catches himself about to use that term. Though he wasn't quite ready to say "laguz" yet, he stopped himself from using "you sub-humans" and instead said "you guys").
slipped up in using sub-human (from habit*) and called her a laguz when speaking to Gatrie because he's becoming more used to using that term regularly. That is to say, it's becoming more natural for him to say.
If you got his A support with Janaff, it makes sense that he slips up sometimes still but is trying to speak more properly about laguz. Getting out of old habits is hard. Feeling differently about something you've had a steady mindset for (in his case for 27 years as per his support with Janaff) is hard. There will be slip ups.
*It's possible Shinon uses "sub-human" as an insult aimed at individuals he doesn't like while not meaning it toward others (i.e. he doesn't like Kyza and Lyre). Yes, this is a big flaw! He could very well be using a racist term to express distaste toward someone specific but not mean it toward the whole of laguz. It's still racist and shouldn't be done, but the fact that he turned around and said "laguz" only a couple sentences later (if that) means that something is kicking in and some gears are turning.
Again, if you look at his A support with Janaff, he wasn't even at the point of using "laguz" at all! If you consider their A support part of his linear development, he starts as he is in PoR, supports Janaff and goes through their conversations while seeing laguz differently now, and ultimately ends at respecting Janaff. Despite this, he's not ready to use "laguz" yet because he experiences with laguz to date, prior to Janaff, had all been presumably negative enough for him to develop this racist mindset.
Linearly, that brings us to RD. He's suddenly fine staying with the GMs and fighting a war on behalf of the Laguz Alliance, even when he was directly given an out. Next, we have him refer to a laguz as a laguz - something he wasn't able to do yet in PoR.
Does the linear progression stop there? Not if you supported Janaff! Following those things, again, when Janaff arrives in 3-7, their bond will show up in their profiles. These bonds are separate from RD support bonds in that they're basically saying these characters were bonded before the events of RD and thus have special bonuses near each other, regardless of if you support them in RD.
So where does this lead us? Well, like in PoR, we start to lose focus on the GMs as a whole and only end up with focus on a few of them. Our next line of progression can only come from supports again. These are notable and extremely important if he's supported with a laguz.
If it's Janaff you support him with in RD, he gets one of his standard support quotes in battle. Maybe you're thinking that sounds unimpressive and unimportant... but this means he's responding to Janaff as someone he's familiar with and not treating differently from the others (which is not the case when responding to several others, which I'll get to). Normally you'd expect him to treat a laguz differently, but he speaks with Janaff like he would to any beorc.
It gives off an air of familiarity - like they already know each other, are passed all that nonsense and aren't even thinking about it anymore. This is, of course, the case regardless of if you supported them in PoR (but again, I find their PoR supports to be important in terms of a proper, full linear progression of Shinon's development, which is something not every character actually even gets, i.e. they don't get a fully fleshed out and ongoing development story between both games if they're not a main character).
It's almost like it's considering that you may have gotten their PoR supports. It has to leave it up in the air as to whether or not you did, because it'd be odd if he was suddenly treating Janaff like they weren't as familiar with each other after getting their PoR supports. In other words, by default, their relationship in RD is not as bad as it starts in PoR in their C support. It feels like they've already supported and are closer now to be at this point.
So why is it important that he acts no different with Janaff than anyone else? Because he does act different near laguz kings. He's given special, personalized lines to the laguz kings and refers to them sincerely as laguz. Important to note is that the laguz kings only become playable in part four (Tibarn and Naesala) and Endgame (Caineghis).
These are characters he would have absolutely no chance at having any development with in either game prior (even if you consider time spent in PoR, Tibarn and Naesala are not playable until the final chapter and you can only pick one of them. Caineghis, plain and simple, is not even an option). That means his supports with them are the very beginning of their relationship.
This is by part four. There's been development since part three in his character that we don't see. He's now openly referring to them as only "laguz" (remember, he was back and forth earlier in RD). He treats them with respect.
"But DCB, of course he does! They're kings! They're powerful!" But the Shinon we started out with in PoR wouldn't have cared less. To him back then a sub-human was a sub-human. Even as allies, he wouldn't have respected them (re: his C support with Janaff). Instead, here, in RD with these supports, he can talk with laguz directly, refer to them as such, and give them respect.
He also doesn't start out being intentionally racist toward them. He's at the point, by the time he can support the laguz kings, where he skips right past the active "sub-human" bullshit.
What do I mean by that? Well... I mean with Tibarn, he almost says sub-human but catches himself and doesn't just say "you guys" like he did with Janaff in their A support (which came before his C support with Tibarn if you consider his development linear and including Janaff). He corrects himself, and instead uses "a king" - similar to his "you guys" pull back, but outright referring to him as a king is actually a step above that (and again, this is their C support).
King Tibarn. It seems like a sub-hu– I mean–a king such as yourself can hold your own.
He's learning! He's growing! He's maturing! He's realizing he can get out of that mindset! All his experiences prior to PoR, based on his supports with Janaff, would imply he's only ever known that he has to protect himself against them. He never got to actually meet one. When he did, it was hard to pull himself out of old habits for new experiences. He was trying for Janaff, but he wasn't quite there yet. Here, he does something very similar.
With the other kings, he just outright refers to them as kings with no stumbles.
Hey, Lion King! Of anybody here, it seems like you’d be just fine.
Raven King, you seem all right. No need to be babied, I hope.
Mind you, the latter is pretty standard Shinon in personality. It's unrelated to Naesala being a laguz. However, both are these are completely respectful as a person talking to another person.
For his B supports we have:
I thought you were the all-conquering King Caineghis! And yet, you mess up. Bizarre. You better stay by me.
Hawk King, whew, even you mess up sometimes. Kinda makes me nervous. You better stay by me.
Raven King–your fighting? Not good. Just…stay by me and let me handle this.
Bizarre, he says, that one of the strongest people he knows is having trouble. He's actually surprised. No comment about how sub-humans suck or anything, not here!
Similarly, even Tibarn messes up sometimes. He's surprised. He expects basically perfectly from Tibarn (so this presumes he has positive expectations of him from what he knows of Tibarn).
Naesala's fighting isn't good? Well what does PoR Shinon care! Let him die! But that's not RD Shinon (and remember, these quotes could've been anything else considering he got specifically personalized quotes with these three, and personalized quotes for RD supports are somewhat few and tend to be for specific pairs).
Stay by me, he says! The same things he'll say to anyone! To any beorc and to any laguz. Again, personalized quotes did exist and they were there for certain pairs. Those pairs got special quotes specifically for their relationship). He didn't avoid saying "stay by me" just because they were laguz.
Mind you, his support quotes with these three are much more respectful than usual Shinon. He's very, uh, hilariously Shinon (there is a word for this, however at this time I cannot think of it 😔. I am not thinking of sarcastic, I am thinking of... something else. Granted, these lines are directed to Reyson and Rafiel, who technically can't fight... so I'll give him a break on that one) in most of his quotes, and some don't sound particularly respectful ("Prince ___, it’s really hard to watch you fight. Why don’t you stay by me and let me handle this?").
Now for the A supports (and BOY HOWDY I'M EATIN' GOOD HERE)...
You know, I’m not one for making friends and being nice. But, Caineghis, I gotta say, you are one bad laguz. In a good way! Hang in there.
I gotta admit… I didn’t like you when I first met you. But, Prince ___, I hope you make it through all this. I was wrong about you.
You know, I really don’t care who lives and who dies. But, Hawk King, for a laguz– hey, for anyone–you seem pretty decent. I hope you make it.
You know, I never thought I’d say this, but… King ___, I’m thinkin’ you should live. Don’t ask me why! Just a crazy notion. Maybe I like you?
Not one for making friends and being nice in general, with beorc, but he's befriending a laguz? Well now! What would PoR Shinon pre-Janaff say!
If you need me to explain the lines to Reyson and Rafiel to you, I have no hope for you at this point. If you can't read "I was wrong about you" and understand what that means, you might need to go back to school. In fact you definitely do.
For a laguz - no, scratch that because that doesn't fucking matter anymore - for anyone - you seem pretty decent (<-- this is the way Shinon talks to everyone).
Maybe he likes Naesala? Maybe they're friends? Maybe he just admitted he's fond of a laguz? Maybe he just said he likes a laguz??? Gosh jolly, early PoR Shinon is rolling in his grave!
So uhhh, what does this have to do with Janaff? Well, like I said, I feel like their supports slot perfectly into Shinon's development that's going to exist anyway. It's like the middle part of it that you get to see but also may miss out on. It's like jumping from PoR to RD and wondering what on earth happened in between to bring Shinon to that point... and if you consider his A support with Janaff, it makes sense that that's what happened. It fills that gap, and it also slots in perfectly with where he is in his development as a character between two games.
Timeline:
PoR start - Shinon hates laguz. He seems to hate them for reasons unknown. Greil dies; Shinon leaves. Chapter 18 is reached and Shinon is recruited back into the GMs. Despite that the GMs are now working with the Crimean army which has actively allied itself with the beast and bird tribes, Shinon whatevers his way through that fact and rejoins. He'll tolerate, he guesses. Fam is here.
Cue Janaff supports. New birb, who dis, except he's rude! Yes folks, it was Janaff who was rude first (his lines were also very Janaff... who is very like Shinon, so it makes sense that would get a negative reaction from Shinon even if he was a beorc). Shinon is set off and now thinks he was right to hate laguz. Look at this annoying birb face and his dumb lil hat!!! Better threaten to kill him just to be safe...
B support, they're having a conversation and learning from each other because Janaff came over to apologize. He knows he was in the wrong to nag at Shinon just for being an unfamiliar face. Shinon is still pissy though because it's a goddamn birb with a hat!!! Their conversation is a mix of ugh fuck this annoying guy to actually talking things out... and Shinon admitting why he hates laguz - because he's always needed to protect himself from "those half breeds". Sounds like his only experiences were very negative, so he ends up racist. Well, Janaff was also racist until very recently for similar reasons, and he used to think all beorc liked to kill. He, too, had misconceptions that bred a racist hatred. Now, though, with Shinon talking to him, he's realized he was wrong about beorc and is open to seeing things differently. Shinon backtracks, realizing he's having this conversation with the birb with a hat and wonders why.
A support, they talk more and it's getting better... and Janaff not only admits to relating to Shinon - which is a nice touch because they're two sides of the same coin who are both still very much learning about each other's races - and mind you Janaff was racist at 110 years old so he's been doing this shit for a while! It was because he talked with Shinon and learned more about beorc that, on top of what Ike did for Leanne, he's being more open minded now. Janaff, understanding where Shinon is coming from (ignorance and misconceptions), is much more polite and kind to him. Shinon, in response, backtracks when he almost uses the racist term "sub-human" so as not to offend Janaff, leaves off here respecting him and, when Janaff has to leave because the support is over, calls him back because he wants to hear more about the world from him because Janaff has lived for so much longer. Maybe the birb with the hat isn't so bad at all after all!!
From here the GMs fight with laguz allies until the end of PoR. Two or three years pass idk shit's inconsistent I guess, and we get to RD.
By this point Shinon has already been in an army that allied with and fought alongside laguz, and maybe that's tempered his feelings. When given an out from joining the other GMs in their aiding of the Laguz Alliance, and as the only beorc, he chooses to stay with the group.
At this point he's back and forth with "sub-human" and "laguz". There's definitely improvement, but old habits still get out sometimes. Still though, he's progressed from "you guys" to outright using "laguz".
The laguz kings join in the fight against Ashera. Shinon can support them, getting personalized quotes specifically for them (and for the herons). With Tibarn, he catches himself and corrects what he almost said - something he did once before with Janaff as per this linear timeline. That's the only instance left of a mistake in his wording. By now he's not using "sub-human" at all (B and A support with Tibarn or C-A with Caineghis or Naesala), or he's freely and without stumbling using "laguz" with no "you guys" esque backtrack.
This is obviously only one aspect of Shinon's development, i.e. the development of him growing out of racism similar to Janaff, and there are more aspects to him that did develop and grow throughout both games, but this post was specifically to highlight the importance of having Janaff there as part of his growth. Without it, it's like a blank, empty spot in his development where you don't know how it started happening and to such a degree (how did he go from outright using sub-human to using laguz at all? It feels like there had to be something in the middle of that growth, and without Janaff's supports it's just missing.
With them though, it's quite clear how he reasonably went from sub-human to "you guys" to laguz with some slip ups (ones that he corrects himself with if he actually respects the person, in this case Tibarn. He didn't bother correcting it with Lyre and Kyza because he didn't like them, which again, is still a flaw, but that was prior to his ability to support the laguz kings. It would be more reasonable to say he's starting to grow out of using "sub-human" just to specific people as an insult by this point.
Mans ain't perfect, but he's trying and he's working on it. Why is that without Janaff involved in his development? I 'unno, I guess he just had some random offscreen development between the games. With Janaff though? It actually works, fits and makes sense. It feels like that part of his development is meant to be there, as it compliments his development going forward.
that's it that's all i had to say bye now
#Shinon#there is quoted evidence so nobody can say im just bias and making shit up 😤#anyway he's a multi faceted character AND gets development which FE does NOT usually do for non-main characters!#they especially don't usually get BOTH of those things!#Shinon's extremely lucky in that regard (especially bc not even all of the GMs were given this treatment and good fortune)#It's also very fun seeing Shinon and Janaff develop simultaneously. you get Janaff a SINGLE chapter before you can#get Shinon back (actually use him again) and the very first time you can ever use Janaff is ON the chapter Shinon returns#cooooincidence? maybe but I choose not to think so#Janaff feels so integral in Shinon's character growth in this regard#at this point my brain has cemented their supports as canon#anyway they're a great couple they never kiss and they definitely don't admit to being in love#they think y'all are delulu for thinking they're dating but actually they're the ones who are delulu#i have a do not separate policy for them in part four so shinon always ends up in the hawk army#which rly i don't need to do bc it's not like i need as many shrieks as i end up with#so really janaff doesn't HAVE to be with ulki and tibarn but it feels right#also it's like the one time i have everyone from a respective class type (archer classes) in every army#ALSO also I think it's an interesting situation to have Shinon in the final chapter before endgame 1#maybe it would be cool to write about someday. him seeing the feral drugged laguz and how nastily mindless/cruel/violent/etc they are#compared to the people he knows and starting to realize this was how he used to see ALL laguz#and now seeing it's only these mindless drugged ones and how the people he knows are nothing like this...
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@ofgctham sent🔪 to walk in on my muse standing over a dead body (for bruce).
betrayal is one of the worst things to have to deal with, barton decided, as he sat with his back flush against one of the cold bathroom walls. it tears you up inside — squeezes your heart in a vice-like grip in a way that makes it seem like it's never going to let it go, and that you were stupid to have trusted anyone at all. barton would know because that is exactly how he felt right now sitting next to violet. he thought that they were friends, for they'd known each other almost a year now. but it was kind of funny how quickly their relationship was destroyed at the first sign that barton wasn't all that he seemed; violet turning into something of a cornered animal, willing to do anything to get out of a situation when she got a text message from someone she used to know. and this was only to find out that barton was hurting them for her.
barton tried to explain it to violet in a way that made sense to him. but of course, she didn't get that he deserved to die for what he did to her. violet was actually scared of the concept. of him, and whenever barton looked into her eyes then, all of the affection she'd felt for him was gone just like that. so much for being the most 'perfect, understanding friend,' as violet almost immediately declared that he needed help and she was going to call the police. needless to say, after hearing that, barton wasn't too pleased. from there, things just continued to escalate. one moment barton was telling violet that he didn't want to hurt her and the next he was trying to plunge a screwdriver he found through her gut. though that same screwdriver was wrenched out of his hands by her and in desperation, violet sunk it into his side whenever barton had taken to choking her out.
and that hurt like hell. she took off from there into the communal bathrooms of the dingy motel they were in to try to hide from him; but barton had found violet despite him leaving a very visible blood trail everywhere he stepped. he killed her by smashing her head into one of the sinks in a rage, it seemed, which he partially remembered and partially didn't. barton's eyes looked like just a bunch of veins with how bloodshot they were from crying while he bit down on his sleeve to keep himself from screaming out due to the pain of pulling out the screwdriver. if someone didn't at least report the blood they'd seen on the pavement out there leading to the bathroom, it'd be a damn miracle. but barton didn't even care if he got caught right now.
it really was a bad idea to take out that screwdriver, for he couldn't even stand now without his legs feeling like jelly and collapsing in on him. but he was able to do it while hanging onto the same bloody sink he'd used to kill violet. her body was right below him, and all barton could think of while looking at her was, why did things always turn out so badly for him? (maybe it was because he deserved it.) he could hear someone's heavy footsteps rush into the bathroom then. and with a weak chuckle, barton turned to face him. the batman. ❝ you're late. she's already gone. ❞ his knuckles turned white with how firmly he was gripping the sink to hold himself up.
❝ i liked her a lot, you know. she was my friend. but something happened, and i just... lost control. ❞ barton cleared his throat while tremors racked his body. looking down at her now made him suddenly feel very hot, probably from all of the adrenaline running through him, ❝ god's, i can't believe i killed her. ❞
#ofgctham#ahh. so... i know this one has an entirely different vibe to it than the one i sent you for jim BUT i uhh might've gotten slightly inspired#and by that i mean i might've been listening to sadder music this time JSJSJ no but barton really did like his friend here.#man's is just so multi-faceted that he can go from being a complete menace one reply to being a rather vulnerable human being-#the next...i guess you could say? yeah it's something like that. but yeahhh i'm sorry if this one was a bit depressing but i hope you like-#it anyhow and that you're having a good day so far <3 also i might've gone with this in the direction that bruce was in his batman-#suit here but i could always change some things around for my reply if you'd prefer for him to be dressed in civilian clothes! though for-#now... barton isn't wearing his mask right now just so you know so his face is clear for everyone to see#tw: blood.#tw: heavy violence.#tw: mentions of murder.#tw: unhealthy relationship dynamics.#tw: negative thoughts.
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i really do worry for the state of media literacy these days
you go into any tag and see people with their whole ass chest saying wrong and untrue shit, and they wholeheartedly believe they’re correct despite the canon source they’re pulling from saying otherwise
#this is specifically about Travis and someone saying he can 'get away with all the murders he committed'#in the ending where he Laura and Ryan find and kill Silas and break the curse#that would mean that canonically Travis has committed NO murders. because he only ever crosses that line when Laura shoots him in chapter 7#and you cannot break the curse by doing so because Laura and Travis have to work together in order to go after Silas#'going to do everything in his power not to get caught'- tell me you didn't absorb anything other than surface level detail from the game#without telling me. because i can very much tell you didn't get much of anything out of the experience#that man literally gives Laura the power to kill him before going after Silas. he is ready to atone then and there to her#he is repeatedly saying and showing that he hates the cover ups and lying and misery the curse and helping his family is causing#you can not like a character but for fuck's sake - making shit up to make you feel more self righteous about your hate is pathetic looking#and most of the information about Travis is hard fact - it is peppered throughout the game through his dialogue and notes/clues/evidence#vs. Silas who there is almost NOTHING set in stone about. you only know that he's the source of the curse and Eliza kept him caged#even Travis in the end can say he has doubts about whether he was actually Eliza's 'son' or if she didn't just take him and cage him#anyways...i know i'm biased but Travis is the most multi-faceted character in the game and he's the best <3
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I love Loki so much I’m going INSANE… I’m going to bite him
#rom.chaotic entanglement🐍💀#The chaotic neutrality of it all…#the fact that his whole facade and vibe stems from this deep seated need to be valued and belong somewhere#The fact that it mostly manifests against Thor (who’s always belonged and always been valued as the firstborn son)#BUT THEY STILL HAVE THEIR MOMENTS AS WELL…. GOSH#I cannot express how much I care about them#YOUR HONOR THEY ARE BROTHERS#I love being late to things like this#I am going through all the fandom stuff (and actual source material) and everything has died down I love it#anyway. he’s so pretty and multi faceted as a character. I will bite/sloppy make out with him
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why write Bad. like why do that.
#i was worried that my i initial interpretation and resulting loss of my mind was just#well i was worried i interpreted it through a very white perspective. sorry. sorry about that#but idk... i'm continuing to think about his perspective and see it more in context#and while i can now more readily see that he was in fact bad and in what ways he was bad#it still reads as funny to me.... right? whether he means it or not it's funny RIGHT? im BAD (^BAD BAD^) im BAD (^REALLY REALLY BAD^)#well i know i'm not crazy#Prince saying i'm not singing 'your butt is mine' to you and you're certainly not singing it to me'#like it's way overdone and ridiculous#....RIGHT?#and i get like. he was trying to rebrand the word 'bad.' the peter pan of pop is STILL the peter pan of pop but he wears buckles now#it still means rebellion! but in kind of the other direction#i have no linear point i'm making here i'm just ruminating ig#trying to figure out if i overshot before. when i first freaked out#i don't think so#i think actually. michael jackson was a really interesting and multi-faceted and shrewd artist#he doesn't let you know how much He knows. yknow?#like. looking more feminine than ever he dons the leather and buckles and says he's bad.#(which... badass. tbh)#there's no acknowledgement or engagement with THAT side of things ok his part#and it's like. so........ wh. how intentional was that? he's more aware than he lets on...#it's like if a stupid simple little song were soooooo complicated#bro these tags are riddled with typos also i'm embarrassed to talk about my ignorance#luckily this is my private little journal. that anyone can see
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I like to think Osvald was a “Live, Laugh, Love” dad before his wife got murdered tbh. Just sends Harvey the Solistian version of cheesy work memes
And the prison time and murder just did this to Osvald
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#Osvald’s second worst crime in Harvey’s eyes is being happy#Harvey would have used one less firestone if Osvald hadn’t sent so many work memes that he had to fake laugh at#Harvey so funny as a character because he just essentially exists to make Osvald’s life worse#just comical levels of evil considering some of the other antagonists like Partitio’s and Throné’s#the former being a capitalist getting a train gundam and the latter just being fairly multi-faceted (Father)#other guy? a bit more comically evil but not Harvey’s level
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I NEEEEEEEEEEEEED TO MAKE A TOJI FIC.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a33004393292c16823f44304ddd3ca4e/29a4eeb2bf9ba036-e8/s540x810/68051cd0439e064e4f0adf0b2711dd9ce0502a54.jpg)
#i already have the title for the fic planned now i just need to plan the actual fic 😭#that’s the most important thing to me but i’m oddly nervous/shy to write him#i think it’s bc he’s my fav and i do NAWT wanna fuck up my characterization of him#he’s sooooooo multi-faceted and there’s so many ways a story can go w him#which is why i do PLAN to make many for him (fluff angst smut etc…)#but for my first fic……….. i want it so be a soft fic……… bc i love him w my whole entire soul#no one understands the Love i have for toji……….. it CONSUMES me.#personal
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