#he’s not.

[kitkats-and-kittens]

Damian loves all animals.

ALL animals.

This is cute and funny when his siblings catch him playing fetch with Titus or snuggling on the couch with Alfred the cat.

It’s not so cute and funny when they find the big-as-fuck dragon bat that he found when he was like 7 and just claimed as his?!?!

Like how do you just get a dragon bat?

It’s even less funny when they find out about the actual 20ft dragon he decided to adopt and name fucking Wiggles. Like you can sit on that things nose. It towers over you?!? It could quite literally consume all 5 feet of you in one bite and you named it Wiggles?!?!

It’s even worse when they realise all animals includes bugs.

Idk Damian just gives of obssssed with bug vibes.

Like he owns several habitats filled with ants. Probably a giant ass spider that gets loose one day and causes a whole ass lockdown since Damian is the only one anyone trusts to not get eaten by it.

They can’t do missions in any sort of area that could potentially be the habitat of any kind of wild life without locking him down and preventing him from picking up some feral beast because it was quote on quote ‘friend shaped’.

The indomitable human spirit is just Damian’s ability to adopt the most unadoptable creatures on the planet. Honestly probably off the planet as well. God forbid that child ever finds some vaguely lonely space alien dog that seems to have zero friends in site cause it’s coming home with him.

Ik Alfred is tried.

[sciderman]

[saturnsorbits]

There’s a secret line AU of my self-ship, where before Bakugo realises he’s actually in love with Kirishima and not me, he gets me pregnant and we have to co-parent…

[sadclowncentral]

the city where we live doesn't allow public barbecues so my brother fucking welded a grill to a handcart and now hosts "chill and grill sessions" where he sends all his friends his live location so they can hunt him down on their bikes with sausages in their backpacks while he carts it around evading the police like some sort of barbecue vigilante, grilling on the run. i have never been prouder of him

[wolfythewitch]

jesus in the hades art style

[scramratz]

[ourlordapollo]

The zoo in my hometown posted this picture of one of their cheetah cubs and I'm obsessed

HIS NAME IS YAM ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDINF ME

[dsmsix]

thought I was muted and just had this exchange with a coworker on a zoom call

[princehendir]

I also think that all the "um okay knives out & glass onion were good. Wrap it up now" posts are so funny. You're tripping if you think there's not going to be at least five Benoit Blanc films lol

[girldraki]

[fangs-4-fags]

remembering the time i drunkenly told a stranger i was a trans man and he started going off about alpha sigma and beta males and how each one was equally important no matter what anyone says and that i shouldn't feel pressured to be a strong alpha male because emotionally intelligent beta males were just as important

[teaboot]

BRUH a dude I know from work came in for the first time in months and I thought he looked different but couldn't figure out why?? So I asked if he'd changed his hair and he was like "BITCH I GOT TOP SURGERY"

[mallalada]

get yourself a main character whos two primary emotions are "little cunt" and "catatonic with grief"

[awittylemon]

kabru is so fucking funny. he’s out here playing 15 dimensional manipulation mind chess with a guy whose hobby is barking like a dog

[longsightmyth]

People are so stupid about snakes. If there's a little black racer chilling outside just leave it alone, you don't have to kill it, it's probably dealing with all your pests for you, jesus christ