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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 1 year ago

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Old Scars, New Blood 1

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, manipulation, borderline bullying, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Reader has accepted that she'll never be wanted, not only by the man she's crushed on for years, but by anyone. That is until a new player enters the game. (f!, short!reader)

Character: Lloyd Hansen, Thor Odinson

Note: I could blame yall for talking me into it but we know it's all my fault.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you all. Take care. 💖

The sharp zip cuts through the air. Lloyd hauls the long black bag up and checks his watch. He struts over to you and shoves the heavy luggage at you, letting it go before you can wrap your arms around it. You nearly topple from the weight.

You grunt and hug it tightly, the long duffle isn't exactly a vacation's worth Hawaiian shirts and cargo shorts. You can feel the long metal barrels as cases of ammo dig into your arms. You manage to get a hand on the handle and swing it after several tries onto your shoulder.

He's already halfway out the door. You trail after him, nearly stumbling to keep up. He's so tall you often find yourself running after him like a stray dog. So tall and handsome and--

Shut up! That's not what you should be thinking about.

Your phone vibrates and you struggle to pull it out of your pocket. You sigh as Lloyd continues along without notice, whistling casually as he approaches the stairs. Shit.

As he begins down the stairs, you stop at the top, leaning with the pull of the bag. You try to reply to the text as he makes quick progress to the bottom.

He whistles up at you and snaps his fingers. You pop your head up and amble down the steps, barely catching yourself against the railing as you slip. When you get to the bottom, he's standing at the door, huffing impatiently.

"What's goin' on, kid?"

Kid. That's what he's always called you. Even though you're not that much younger than him. It's never sweetheart or honey like the pretty ones. Just kid.

"Plane's delayed. There's headwinds--"

"Christ's sake," he snarls.

"Sorry, sir, the pilot's trying--"

"Boring," he chops his hand through the air to silence you, "let's go."

He stands by the closed doors. You try not to let his impatience bother you. You can't blame him. He has an important mission. There's no time to be waiting on a cloud cover.

You open the right door and he steps through, tramping down the stone stairs to the mosaic walkway. Once more you're on your toes as you scurry after him. You watch how his jacket stretches between his shoulder blades. His sleeves hug his arm tightly, showing off his hard work and muscle. You shake your head, stop. Ten years. You know better.

You're out of breath as you get the idling car. Jackson, the driver nods but is similarly ignored as he opens the door for Lloyd. You go to the trunk as it pops and you put the gun bag inside.

You get in the other side as Lloyd splays his legs out and unlocks his phone with his thumb. You keep your cell clutched tight and tap it nervously. He doesn't handle roadblocks well, he's the type to demand and get. Something he hired you to make sure of.

"Well, extra time, I guess," he mutters as he swipes across the screen.

The car rolls up the long drive as you check your messages again. Still no updates. You cross one leg over the other as Lloyd's loafer nearly touches your oxford shoe.

"Hmmmm, can't decide on this one," he grumbles and tilts his screen toward you, "what do you think, kid?" He wiggles it at you as you look at the woman on the screen, "tits are nice but the tattoo screams Hep C."

You nearly gasp but just raise your eyebrows instead. He's always looking for a reaction. Your cheeks set alight and you twiddle your fingers around your own phone.

"Well, sir, I… she's pretty."

"Relax, you won't be invited to threesome," he scoffs and leans back, swiping left, "that's what this is for. Variety."

You don't say a word as you bring your hand to the side of your neck, feeling the heat of your skin. It's not just that it's him saying it, it's that gnawing feeling of inadequacy. The mystery of the unknown makes you self-conscious and wary of saying the wrong thing. The same way when you talk to your sister and she tells you about her husband. Well, you don't hear from her much these days.

"I'll send you their info. You can make a few calls before we get back," he snickers, "get everything ready for me."

"Uh, sure, sir, but uh… like I said before, that's not exactly part of my job."

"Don't tell me what your job is," he barks as he blacks his phone, "goddamn, you're always such a tight ass. Usually I'm all for a tight hole but you really know how to squeeze a man by his balls."

"I'm sorry, sir–"

"Another fucking 'sorry, sir' and I'm gonna snap. I can't do eight hours on a flight with you pouting like that."

"Understood, won't happen again," you dip your head down, "sorry, s–"

You clap your hand over your mouth. The words are so habitual they start to fall out before you realise, and yet another urge to say them. Just stop talking. You peek at Lloyd with wide eyes and drop your hand.

"You're a fucking downer, kid," he sits forward, "Jackie, pull the fuck over."

"Yes, sir," the driver replies from the little speaker under the barrier between the front and back seat. "You, get the fuck out."

You're surprised by his sudden flare of anger. There's not much about him that truly shocks you anymore but as irritable as he can be, this is unusual. His agitation has boiled to molten hot in a matter of minutes.

"Sir?"

"You can walk back and start getting shit ready. I mean, we'll see if you can since you can't get the goddamn plane on the ground," he growls as the car pulls onto the gravel wing of the road. "You're getting fucking soft, kid."

"Sir, I didn't–"

"You did. You fucking killed my boner so get out," he shoos you with his finger and unlocks his phone again, "buh bye."

You hesitate. You slowly move to the door and let yourself out. You're buzzing in disbelief. He can be a jerk, you're used to that, but this all seems so abrupt. You can only assume there's something else bothering him.

You shut the door as you stand on the side of the road. You hear Lloyd's deep timbre muffled inside the car before it pulls away. You stare after it, crossing your arms as you sniff and the sun glares along the edge of your vision.

You slowly turn and face the horizon. You're not that far. Maybe twenty minutes. Well, the single silver lining. You can't help your disappointment. You look forward to missions. It's an excuse to be with Lloyd. A reason for him to put up with you.

You set off, trodding along without urgency. There's nothing at the compound for you. It's not like you go on every mission but it's the unexpected change that gets you. More so, his temper. You see it aimed at others more than yourself.

Your phone buzzes again. The plane's landed. That's good news. As you continue your trek, you dial out to Lloyd's phone and put the speaker to your ear. No answer. Several more tries have a similar result, the last call clicking dead right away.

You send a text and it bounces back as undeliverable. You don't get it, your signal is strong. It's a military grade phone. You slide your phone away and try not to let your anxiety get the best of you.

He wouldn't block your number, would he?

You're not special, that much is clear, but you've stuck around so long that you just can't see it ending over one slip-up. Sure, Lloyd has screamed agents out of the compound, he's even stranded them in hostile grounds, but they weren't there as long as you've been.

You drag your feet as you approach the gate. You let yourself in with the code and ignore the gazes of agents as you cross the yard and go back inside.

All this and for what?

If Lloyd fires you, you've spent ten years pent up in places like this, doing his grunt work. The tail end of your twenties and much of your thirties traded for imagined cues and empty hopes. You accepted long ago that Lloyd would never see you, just the woman he called 'kid', but the thought of losing even that makes you want to cry. You can accept that you're not as good as the models he fucks around with, but you can't accept not being there at all.

You're overreacting. You always do this. It's always the end of the world.

Lloyd will come back and everything will go back to normal. You're the only one who gets his coffee right and knows that he hates mushrooms but loves Salisbury steak. He needs you, just not like you want him to.

❤️‍🩹

Radio silence. You don't hear from him and any message you try to send is unanswered. He's on a mission, he's in blackout mode, yet you can't help but be paranoid.

Without him to order you around, you're not quite sure what to do with yourself. It's sad but that's just who you are. You're not the one doing, you're the one listening to those who do.

The first day is the worst of it. On the second, you're not as addled and a bit relieved not to be hidden in some safe house waiting for a signal or listening to Lloyd make sick jokes. Still, you'd rather be with him.

The second night, you expect some sort of word from him. Still nothing.

You lay in bed, restless. You don't dream about him anymore, you don't close your eyes and think about what it'd be like to be beautiful or interesting, you know it will never happen. But you worry about him. That you'll never be rid of.

The third morning, a Saturday, you go down to make your coffee. Other agents mill about as the tech crew speak into their headsets and type furiously. Something’s going on.

You near the doorway and listen in, trying to discern the chaos. There's cams to switch cameras and directions given, coordinates read out and warnings about oncoming targets. It's the usual, the same chatter you listen to over the comms when Lloyd's out in the field. Now you can only hear one side.

As the tempo builds, there's another furor. The chime that signals the censor at the front gate. Rico storms out of comms central as you flatten yourself to the wall and wait to trail him until he's past the stairs.

"What the fuck is going on?" He waves an agent in black close, "who the fuck is here?"

The agent puts his fingers to his earpiece, "we have sights."

"I asked who it was, not if you can make a shot," Rico shoves the man and stomps to the front doors, shoving them open before him. "Tell them to go the fuck away."

An agent runs up the driveway, puffing as he holds his gun securely in front of him. He stops as Rico gets to the bottom of the stairs

"Sir, sir, it's… it's Valhalla."

"Val-what?" Rico snips.

"Valhalla!" The man repeats louder.

"Shit. Fuck." Rico continues in a rampant flurry of Spanish, "they're early."

"Sir," the agent bows his head as another appears before him.

You frown and watch from the doorway, trying to stay out of sight as you eavesdrop.

Hm. Valhalla. You know the name, rather well, but only through correspondence. A code name. For a faceless man and his deep pockets. You hadn't heard it recently though. You thought that whole thing fizzled out.

"Fuck, Hansen, take your fucking time," Rico mutters between his Spanish diatribes, "let them in. Full search." You hear him clop back up the stairs before he blusters inside, "I need men. Now!"

He turns and sees you cradling your coffee with a dumb look. He sneers and rolls his eyes, "perfect. You'll do. We need rooms. We have guests."

"What?" You squint.

"You're a woman, you should know how to make them at home."

"You're not my boss," you grimace and drink your coffee.

"Don't get smart with me just because that idiot keeps sniffing at his heels. Go and do something useful for once," he claps at you.

You don't move. You take orders from one person. Otherwise, you stay out of the way.

"Fuck!" He hollers and twists on his heel again.

He marches into the next room and you slowly near the front doors, still ajar as they gape out at the golden day. You come outside and descend the steps, standing just by the plinthed flower vase at the bottom. You watch the gates roll apart, letting in the convoy lined outside.

There are four cars in total. All ivory and gleaming. They hardly seem like military vehicles.

You don't get it. You pull out your phone and scroll through your emails. The last message you got from Valhalla was months ago and it left you at a stalemate between them and your indomitable boss.

The first car pulls up and stops, the other fanning out behind it. Agents circle, keeping a broad perimeter as they watch with similar intrigue. Rico appears again, muttering to himself as he holsters a gun.

You look back to the grated bumper of the luxury SUV. The engine rolls over as you find yourself holding your breath. This is it, the vaunted Valhalla. You keep your mug close to your chest as the car door opens and your jaw nearly hits the floor.

It's a man more gorgeous than anyone you've ever seen before. Well, maybe not everyone but damn close. His golden hair is braided down his back and a few wavy strands hang loose around his face. His sky blue eyes shine in the sunlight as he smiles, the expression lining his face immaculately. You gulp and force your mouth shut.

There's a brief lull before anyone reacts. Rico is the first to snap into action. He clamours down and offers a hand, "Valhalla, hello, Rico. Hansen is in the field but I will be your host."

"Ah, Rico," Valhalla repeats with a keen lilt, "you'll do for the time being."

His blue eyes scan the facade of the compound. It appears nothing more than a remote and overpriced mansion. The man takes a deep breath as if tasting the air and pauses as his gaze falls upon you. His brows twitch but he does not react otherwise.

He turns back to Rico and claps his back, "well, we traveled far, we require food and sleep and if you can spare it, lots of alcohol."

#lloyd hansen #thor #dark lloyd hansen #dark thor #dark!thor #dark!lloyd hansen #thor x reader #lloyd hansen x reader #the gray man #mcu #avengers #marvel #au #series #old scars new blood #fic #dark fic #dark!fic

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postersofleon · 1 year ago

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SEVEN

Leon had issues and you understood them. Tied in a world where he couldn't even trust his own government, where bioweapons are a common thing and mistrust is common. Breaking up with an alcoholic with the best option to have. However, when time passes, Chris decides to bring you to help with Leon's current crisis. When he sees you, he is ready to give endless promises now. Seven days to win you back.

notes: i maybe like pathetic men but healing is hotter. inspired by jungkook's seven. no assigned race to reader but afab and she/her pronouns for them. EDIT! um, future chapters will have smut

monday: loving you

tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday, saturday, sunday

Being an agent wasn't made for you. You spend nearly twelve years training your body, scars had now decorated your body- it wasn't fair that your life was dominated by the cruelty of the world. When Wesker died, you hoped and prayed to any living god that this was over, but it was a useless dream. And with what happened in your last mission. You were tired. You woke with night terrors and your boyfriend wasn't doing so hot either. All the way from Raccoon City, his mind was still traumatized by seeing death that Ada Wong became his worry. He needed to protect her despite her being able to do it herself.

You weren't jealous. No matter how many people warned you should, and trusting Leon didn't bring horrible consequences. That was until Leon pointed a gun on Chris.

No offense, but Ada wasn't worth making your life worse in the government's eyes. There was an uneasy silence now. Even Helena noticed it.

You couldn't date him. His drunkness was getting into a dangerous issue, and now his sense of what's wrong or right. You liked Ada. But unfortunately, despite being a mercenary, she always worked for the bad people. Combining that with his saviors complex. You didn't want to be selfish. It had been years. You dated Leon for years, but right now. Especially pointing a gun to someone who was promised to always stay by their side.

You couldn't trust Leon.

But you still loved him. That was no issue. Maybe you needed to heal as well.

Two years had passed. You were still working in the DSO, but for now, as a nurse who helped the injured agents. It was a suprise when you saw Chris and Rebecca enter your lair. You took off your gloves, "What brings you two here?"

Chris gave a small smile, "Um, well, we are trying to find Leon."

Your eyebrows furrowed, "Leon? Why ask?" You threw them to the trash. Wouldn't bring Jill be a better option considering that Leon was on vacation?

Rebecca cleared her throat, "He is... hard to find."

A small laugh escaped your lips, "Always is." Your arms crossed against your chest. Chris looked a bit disappointed from your words, but Rebecca looked determined with your laugh. "You know where he is?" Your eyes touched the ground before meeting Rebecca's.

"Of course I know where he is. He sends me texts."

Chris looked up, "I thought you two broke up." You nodded your head, "Yeah, but it makes him happy to tell me where he is." And you'll be avoiding his booty calls in this conversation.

"But you need to leave him alone. He is tired." You made sure they heard those words. Leon is exhausted. He needed a break from the life given to him. You turned around and gave them your back, "Everyone deserves to take a break." Your fingers tapped on the cold metal table.

"He needs you." Chris whispered softly.

You turned around to see him, "He needs comfort." You knew Leon way too much. It hurt you to say it because it felt true. "He finds comfort in the bottle more than he did with me." It was your bitterness just approaching over and over. You sighed deeply, trying to ignore your anger.

"If you need him so badly, I'll tell you where he is," You grabbed your phone and looked through all of his texts, "Here." You showed Chris and Rebecca. "Now leave me alone." Your fingers tapped repeatedly against the table, and before you can clear your thoughts you got a message from him.

You turned around to see Rebecca and Chris. You were probably stupid thinking an alcoholic could change his ways. "I'll go."

#resident evil #leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #vendetta leon #leon kennedy angst

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honey-milk-depresso · 11 months ago

Note

Batboys watching anime with reader

You know my ass went FULL ON LOCK MODE with Tim. I went crazy- 💀

***S/o is above 18, which means characters below are also aged up!

Doing requests until 1 Feb! Please see my pinned post and read the request rules on the navi! Thank you!🩷

Batbros watching anime with you

Dick Grayson

He’s watched a few 90s anime before, more the basic ones like One Piece and Pokémon, and he probably still watches them to this day. Boy has old CDs he has and you should probably try finding a Blue Ray (or use his if he can have Tim help fix it because it’s good as dead 💀) because he’s popping in every CD of old anime’s he have lying about.

“Wow, I didn’t know I had cowboy bebop! Or Slam Dunk!” He got a few rare gems, which makes it all the more fun to sit down on the couch under a blanket as you huddle and watch the nostalgic 90s anime shows together while eating popcorn.

He doesn’t mind watching new, modern day animes, just be prepared for when you two watch sad anime shows because he will sob like it’s the end of the world.

“NO, WHY WOULD KAORI DIE LIKE THIS?? AND SHE LOVES ARIMA- OH MY GOD IM SO—”sobs even more. He gets emotional while watching them because it’s so sad that it’s sO GOOD-

Loves dancing to those danceable anime music with you. He goes ALL. OUT. He even sings all of it in Japanese like wow-

I would love to hear him sing Cruel Angel’s Thesis in his Discowing suit and with goth makeup on it because it “sets the mood”, PLEASE-

Overall, great time watching with Dick. <3

Jason Todd

You expect someone like him to like Chainsaw Man, Trigun or something like those grunge-y, guns and knives animes, right? I mean, he does, but only with you and ONLY with you will he let his inner Magical Girl enthusiast ass shine. Because he LOVES Magical Girl animes. That’s probably the reason and one point of time why he wore red ribbons around his arms, he wanted that Sailor Moon experience and Tim might’ve just teased him about that era without knowing his love for Magical Girl animes and Jason might’ve flipped and freaked the fuck out and started chasing him down the manor.

Jason watches Sailor Moon, Madoka when he feels edgier than usual, Cardcaptor Sakura, every Precure series, Tokyo Mew Mew, man has all these shows somehow. He swears they weren’t through illegal means and he just worked very hard to gather all of them. He also might be a shoujo anime fan because if he loves Jane Austen books, you bet his ass would be reading Fruits Basket, Maid Sama or something because of course he would.

Also a Studio Ghibli fan, although watching the Tale of Princess Kaguya might make him feel too much, especially getting pissed off with the dad who forces his daughter into a wealthy life without her input and- yeah, you gotta calm him down as he cries bitterly and sourly with a pout on his face.

The two of you can go on and on about debating about unclear endings of animes all day long. You know the “AND SHE WAS A PRINCESS” video? That’s Jason.

Great man to watch anime with, and he’ll gladly be your Tuxedo Mask to your Sailor Moon (and not the “But you did nothing meme- or the other way around- he don’t mind being the Usagi-). <3

Tim Drake

I’m very convinced this man got into his whole detective shit because he watched Detective Conan and honestly I can’t blame him. Tim has probably the largest vessel of anime knowledge out of all of them. He doesn’t really have a specific genre he likes but he’s pretty fond of old 90s and 80s animes. He can explain the whole lore of One Piece, Fairytale, Pokémon like Jesus Tim, calm down- 💀

I can see him watching Neon Genesis Evangelion, Serial Experiments Lain or Key the Metal Doll because he likes that little bit of horror nature and mystery and thriller in his animes although he really doesn’t mind watching Haikyuu all over again if you want to.

Might introduce you to underrated and/or old animes like Revolutionary Girl Utena, Nadia the Secrets of Blue Water, every Studio Ghibli movie, those kinds of animes that give off the really pretty and aesthetic old anime animations that is just so pretty to watch and with really good storylines that both of you can cuddle on a couch together and watch. I bet he even watches anime with you even before you two got together, so you guys pretty much have “watching anime together” as part of the foundation of your relationship. Owns so much manga that you can’t even count, too.

Just… don’t make him watch those really slow burn, comedy love animes, specifically Love War. Not that he don’t like romance animes, he watches Ouran High School Host Club and Your Name, trust me, but Love War? He is going absolutely insane because of it.

“OH MY GOD- PLEASE JUST KISS ALREADY. ME AND S/O ARE ALREADY TOGETHER FIVE MONTHS AGO ANF YOU TWO ARE STILL TOO PROUD TO ADMIT YOU LOVE EACH OTHER WHILE BLUSHING- JUST KISS ALREADY-” <3

Damian Wayne

Damian likes anime. Would 100% go to an anime convention with you as a date if you’re up for it. He doesn’t mind (surprisingly- just for you only-).

He doesn’t necessarily like showmen animes although he has enjoyed a few, but he really loves slice of life, I feel. It just feels like he wants to put himself in a normal life and with a tad bit of drama in it like what the characters go through. The touching ones like Hyouka or Natsume’s Book of Friends.

Also animal related anime maybe except Beastars because he didn’t understand shit-?? He calls that peak anime. Aggretsuko, Chi’s Sweet Home and My Roommate is a Cat?? Damian loves this shit, he watches it intently with his arm around you. Even if he doesn’t smile, you know he loves it by the way his eyes sparkle.

Just don’t tell his brothers. He will seriously feel betrayed if you do so because he only watches these kinds of shows with you: the cute animal ones that are actually wholesome and/or funny.

The whole family is into Studio Ghibli, and he is no exception. He feels like it’s the best kinds of anime to watch with you when you guys just want to turn in for the day and huddle up on the couch. It’s one of the rare times he relaxes and softens and he’s glad to have quality time with you. <3

Duke Thomas

He likes anime! Studio Ghibli is definitely a favourite of his and he would gladly watch it together with you! He also love a fair bit of Shounen animes, the more popular ones like Jujutsu Kaisen, One Piece, Haikyuu, or Spy x Family. He likes them a lot!

A big fan of romance animes too: Ouran High School Host Club and The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya (if you two are in the mood to huddle on the couch together and cry).

Duke doesn’t mind any kind of anime so long as it doesn’t have too much horror or gore like… Higurashi. He gets chills when that anime is mentioned. D-Don’t watch it for your own sake if you don’t know. And if you do, avoid it with him at all cost because he will.

Duke also like singing some good anime songs with you and you guys can go crazy and dance around, just not as dramatic as Dick.

He would be super excited to spend a date with you watching shounen anime movies like from Jujutsu Kaisen and he would be so hype to spend time with you being a fanboy while also sharing that romantic air for the shared love of anime between you two and the love that you two share, although that love is far stronger. <3

Reblogs help! ^^

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asherashedwings · 5 months ago

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Hey chat, remember when I did that one charting pattern analysis on Pico and Darnell?

Well I'm doing that again. But with EVERY FNF CHARACTER.

Girlfriend

Girlfriend, shocker, doesn't really have a pattern. This is mainly due to her being featured in only one song, and it's the tutorial. If we ever get any action from her in the future, then maybe we can find something then, but for now: no pattern.

Daddy Dearest & Mommy Mearest

Okay, so they do have a pattern, and it's a shared pattern. I mean, makes sense, since they're kind of a package duo. It's kinda hard for me to explain, but they have patterns that tend to focus on the left and right notes?? If that makes sense. Good examples I can think of are Satin Panties, High, and Cocoa. Mearest more so than Dearest, but Dearest's base charts are also rather simple due to his week being so early. BUT! These patterns are apparent in his Erect songs! Namely Bopeebo. But yeah, patterns that are left and right note focused. Which -- and I don't know if this is just a coincidence or not -- seems rather fitting given the colors of those notes: red and purple.

Spooky Kids

Another set of characters that don't really have a set pattern that I can distinguish. Although, I do find that rather fitting for them. Their lack of pattern matches their rather chaotic nature that's displayed in their show. They're just silly unpredictable guys.

Monster

Okay, so Monster is just already so different from everyone else that it's just hard to hold him to the same standard. But he does have his own patterns! Namely a LOT of hold notes. Which makes sense due to the lingering nature of his songs. He's slow and eerie, so of course his charting would reflect that

Pico

Okay, so I've covered Pico before. He does a lot of back and forth patterns. .... I could turn this into a super complex character analysis that is completely just my brainrot talking but I don't know if I should go there. I'm going there. Okay, so Pico's entire character in FNF revolves around him going back on the various jobs he's been given to protect Boyfriend and Girlfriend. Week 3? Backing out of his job to rap with BF instead. Week 7? Denying his mission yet again to save BF and GF. He's constantly going back and forth between his job and his morals. And it's not always clear which is the correct option. This same logic can also be applied to Weekend 1, except it's not him choosing BF and GF over his job -- it's him choosing them over his friends: Darnell and Nene. His character is just a constant cycle of back and forths.

Senpai

Okay, so this fucker was the reason I first wanted to make a full analysis on all the characters. So, this guy I noticed, uses a lot of trail notes. And in my brain it does tie into his character and. Like. The only way that I can explain it is like. You know those videos of people arguing with misogynists, and the misogynist keeps cutting off the other person before they can make their point, and keep repeating the same thing over and over again cuz they think that's how arguments work? That's the same vibe I get from Senpai's trail notes. It feels like he's just. Repeating the same things over and over again cuz he thinks he's making a point. And just going on and on so BF can’t speak Idk. If that makes sense.

Tankman

Tankman uses a lot of stairs. I had no idea what to make an analysis out of here, so to quote the wise words of @braveboiart ; "He's a bitch and I hate stairs." ACTUALLY! That is half right. Came up with this while replaying Week 7 for this post. Tankman is explicitly shown to be able to break the fourth wall, so it is entirely possible that in Ugh and Guns, he is purposefully using an egregious amount of stairs to just. Be a pain in the ass. This would also perfectly explain his switch up in Stress. He's taking BF and the player a little bit more seriously, so he starts to be a bit more genuine. Also, I would like to point out that he also uses back and forths a ton. Tankdad canon. ALSO I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE NOTE OF A LIL DETAIL I NOTICED WHEN PLAYING PICO ERECT

Pico Erect shares charting from Stress. Realistically, this is likely just a lil reference to Stress since Pico made in appearance in that song but FUCK YOU, TANKDAD CANON.

Darnell

Okay, so I've already gone in depth on Darnell, so this is mostly gonna be me repeating myself. Good to have everything in one place, yknow? Darnell has a progression of charting throughout Weekend 1. In Darnell, he starts out almost identical to Pico's charting, before slowly transition to his trail and double heavy charting through Lit Up and 2Hot. My analysis of this was the idea that he starts out the week mocking Pico; making fun of the fact that Pico chose to rap battle BF instead of killing him. But as the week progresses, he gets more into it and starts having fun with it, slipping into his own style.

And last but not least

Boyfriend

Okay, so, surprise surprise: Boyfriend doesn't really have a pattern. But it's not cuz he just repeats everyone! There's actually a lot of moments where he freestyles, namely in the Erect tracks. But when analyzing those bits, there isn't really any set pattern. Which makes sense! BF is a go with the flow kinda guy. The charting he uses depends on what the moment calls for; what will outshine his opponent the most. I mean, his charting kinda needs to be versatile, given the variety of his challengers. So yea.

Uhhh... Hope y'all enjoyed my analyses. I'm gonna go pass out now (It is 4:36am at the time of writing this rn)

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misctf · 2 years ago

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Age Burner

“Getting older ain’t easy”. My dad would often say that when I was growing up, and like most things your parents tell you, I didn’t take it too seriously. But 30ish years later, I started to appreciate those words of wisdom. I was a college baseball player, the ladies were all over me, and I actually had hair on my head and not everywhere else. But now I can barely throw a baseball around with my son without an ache or pain. And with him about to go off to college and play baseball, it was like he was reliving my golden days.

So with father’s day and my birthday coming up, another great reminder of my age, I decided to get something for myself. I happened across an internet ad, big letters flashing “Age Burner!” Initially thought it’d be some type of scam supplement or something. But I ordered it and a few days later, a small package arrived with a single pill. I had half a mind to throw it out, but I already spent the money. I took the pill right before I went to bed as instructed, and had the best sleep of my life. When I woke up the next morning, I immediately noticed a difference. No aches or pains! My skin felt youthful and firm. No hair anywhere but my head! I ran to the mirror and was shocked- it was like time was turned back and I was my old 19-year old self. I could barely keep my hands off my firm pecs and my abs. I even flexed to show off my guns. It felt so good to be back.

After some time, I rummaged through my closet and found my old baseball glove, a grin forming on my face. I knew what I wanted to do. I wanted to play ball with my son, show him what his old man was capable of back in his youth. I ran over to his room, excited to spend the day with him when my heart sunk. The man sitting in my son’s bed looked nothing like him: bald, hairy, a small flabby gut sitting between his legs. He looked up at me, a handful of his gut in his hand, too shocked to say anything.

After the initial shock subsided, and my son had two cups of coffee, we went and investigated. The pill does in fact burn away age, almost like a fat loss supplement. But that age had to go somewhere and in this case, it all went to my son. Reversal should be easy enough, he would just need to take the pill too. The problem was the pill was on back order for at least a few months- apparently it was very popular and the company was having a hard time keeping up their supply.

It’s been a few weeks without them taking any new orders, but my son seems to be adjusting well. He’s enjoyed keeping up with lawn care and found himself a construction job. And the other day, he offered to fire up the grill for me and my new buddies from the baseball team. I even came home and found him sipping a beer on the patio and laughing with a few of his new work buddies. I'm just happy he's happy. To tell you the truth, the longer things stay like this, the more I wonder if we’ll want to go back. I for damn sure know my answer.

#male tf #male transformation #age progression #agre regression

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equiz923 · 6 months ago

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Please don’t crucify me for this, but I really do not like how dunmeshi ended. Spoilers for the ending of the manga under the cut (obv this is all my opinion but if you have a diff one and you wanna chat im v open to that)

Ending things is hard, ending great stories is even harder but I just finished rereading the manga in full and it makes it so apparent how rushed the ending feels.

With Laios specifically, him running a kingdom Does Not make sense. It feels too storybook ending. ESPECIALLY with what the winged lion showed him during his dream- the idyllic world where he runs a monster kingdom but figures it all out. I thought that this was kind of clear with how dream falin had to shoo him away from his actual duties to make the idea more palatable. It was a clear manipulation by the winged lion to try make it something Laios would actively want to do, an appeal to his greater sense of morality to try convince him that he was the good guy, especially because we all know he just deep down wanted to be a super epic monster.

With this in mind, the manga actually ending with him running the kingdom is insane. We as an audience have already found out and understood that he actually does not want to do that shit, and that there is no way that the kingdom would prosper under him. I personally really don’t like the way that the winged lion’s curse is pretty much thrown in as a joke on the final page, because the idea is really really interesting from a character perspective. From what we know of Laios, would he not clearly break at some point and try to chase after the monsters? Go insane? Both? Also him always being hungry is such a genuinely cool idea that gets another throwaway line, that has such interesting character implications. It is fine to add that as a footnote at the end, but it’s not treated with the gravity it should have.

Another character I think really got rushed toward the end is Marcille. Her character resolution of after the banquet being okay with Falin’s death is crazy. Her calling her time with the winged lion a tantrum is insane. Her extending of others life may be something that she now sees the consequences of, but there is not payoff for that realisation. We do not see it happen, it apparently occurs offscreen.

There’s a lotta other little things that feel off to me but those are my two main examples. I found in reading it again there were times that the story didn’t show or explain things properly (Kabru in magic handcuffs is something I only found out about when he broke them, I genuinely cannot find where itsumi found that doll of Yadd). You can make the argument that’s a reading comprehension error on my end, that’s fine but there were enough small things that I don’t think I’m the only one that missed small half panel cues. Chekov’s gun only works if you let the audience actually see and note the gun.

Again, please don’t take this as a hate rant, I genuinely love dunmeshi. It’s a really good story. But the best stories are the ones that need to be critiqued. The basic happy ending just does not fit at all, to the point that it feels completely wrong.

Idk, hi if you actually read this whole thing, you’re a legend. Please tell me your opinions id love to hear them

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dunmeshi #dungeon meshi spoilers #HUGE ENDING SPOILERS #I needed to get this out I felt like I was going insane #like Laios would as king #dude that shit would crumble to dust in a week #that would be a funny ending as well Why didn’t they do that??!??!??!!!??#absolutely illegible media criticism is my middle name

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thewulf · 2 years ago

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Thick and Thin Part 2 || Jake "Hangman" Seresin

Request: Reader is a former police officer, but now is working at the hard deck. Her last undercover work went terribly wrong and she was hurt really bad (got captured and held in a damp and cold cellar.... See rest here

A/N: We’re pretending the aviators are at Top Gun for a few months not a few weeks! Didn’t follow the prompt completely… but it’s cute! Def more cute than angsty. Enjoy!

Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Y/N

Word Count: 3,900+'

Part 1

“Are you alright?” Penny asked. Flicking your eyes up towards the sandy haired woman you gave her a faint nod.

You shot her the best smile you could muster, “I’m fine.”

“I think those glasses are clean enough Y/N. You’ve been at them for the last thirty minutes, yeah?” She took the rag from you sensing something was off. Something didn’t seem quite right with you this afternoon. Far quieter than your normally chipper and happy self.

“Sure. They were just really dirty is all. You should really have that washer checked out.” Nervously, you laughed knowing she sensed you were off. Because of course she did. Penny could read you like a damn book. Any damn book she wanted you to be.

“What’s wrong?” She asked as she watched you walk around the bar. She gently pushed you down into the barstool outside the bar.

Sighing, you knew there wasn’t a way you could get out of talking about this one, “It’s dumb Penny. Really dumb.”

She shook her head, “Can’t be dumb if it’s got you thinking so hard.”

Looking ahead you saw the group of aviators with their newest addition, Olivia, the blonde that you thought was leagues above you, “Jake’s got himself a new girlfriend.” You nodded in her direction trying not to look like you were shooting daggers right at her. You wanted to. This jealousy thing sucked.

Penny’s eyes followed your line of sight over to her regular group of aviators. Her eyes raised as she scanned over the new girl, taking her in, “How do you know she’s with Jake?” She asked hoping you wouldn’t really have an answer.

You shrugged, “Might’ve been his hand on her ass or them making out last night in the booth, something like that.” Looking away you turned your attention back to Penny.

She sighed seeing your deflated face. “Well, that’s a sign I suppose.” She nodded in agreement, “She’s just a fling honey.” Penny continued seeing the utter sadness seep through your expression.

“She’s gorgeous Penny, I don’t think…” You paused not really wanting to think about what this really meant. Did this mean he’d no longer come up and talk with you? Flirt with you? Even you had to admit that was some of the most fun you’d had working at the bar. The nights when Jake were there flew by, he made sure of it.

She shook her head not letting you respond either, “Look, I’ve known Hangman longer than you. She’s definitely just a fling. Doubt she’ll be around tomorrow.”

Penny was wrong though. She was around the next night and the night after that. When she showed up the following Friday night you were sure you were about to lose it. Your only saving grace being Bradley. He was out on a training mission for the week so when that tall brunette walked through the front door you about sang his praises right then and there. A smile crept up your cheeks as you made eye contact with the cocky son of a bitch you’d grown close to over the previous few months. God were you thrilled he’d taken a job at Top Gun.

“Bradley.” You smiled handing him a tall glass of his favorite draft, “Glad you’re home. First one’s on the house.”

“Better be.” He grinned taking it from you. He only threw his hands up in defense when he saw your bitter scowl, “I kid! Thank you, Y/N. It’s good to be back.”

You nodded, “That’s more like it.” It felt almost foreign to smile after the shitty week of hidden frown’s you’d been giving seeing your less than favorite couple walk through those doors. You hadn’t even tried to make eye contact with him. The second you saw him with her you’d turn the other direction.

Things got a little rocky the third time you saw her. She’d come up and ordered drinks for her and Jake in a not so nice manner. You replied back in a not so nice manner. She tried to get you in trouble with Penny bitching about her bartender having an attitude, but Penny shrugged it off before telling you all about it. That was the night you could feel Jake’s eyes on you, but you couldn’t look at him. Not after that. You hated making yourself look like a fool and you were sure she was painting you as a full on clown now. Why’d you have to let Bradley talk you into your feelings for this stupid boy?

“How’ve you been?” Bradley asked taking a seat in front of you. It was still early enough in the night that you weren’t too busy yet and could spare the time to chat.

You nodded wiping up the counter in front of him, “Okay. Weather’s been shitty. You picked a good week to leave.”

He leaned back taking you all the way in. He too could see right through you like Penny could. A quick glance around the bar confirmed his senses. Hangman was sitting over in the corner with a blonde girl on his lap without a care in the world. He was only gone a week and Hangman had managed this already. Bradley knew how sensitive you were about your injuries. How insure they had made you. How they made you feel like you were less than and didn’t deserve the love you really did deserve. To see Hangman sit there and almost confirm all those fears in the time he was gone pissed him off. Bradley was proud of how much progress he had made with the two idiots who didn’t seem to know what they wanted. He had managed to get you both to confess to him the true nature of either of your feelings. It perplexed him how he was now in a worse off situation than he had left the previous week.

“Who’s that?” Bradley asked leaning closer to the bar again knowing how much you probably didn’t want to be talking about it. But he knew you were trapped. Sure, you could run and serve other customers but eventually you’d have to come back and talk to him.

Rolling your eyes you snuck a quick glance at the overly touchy couple in the booth on the far side of the bar, “Olivia. A teacher or something like that.”

Bradley raised his eyebrows letting his glasses slide down his nose, “You know that’s just a distraction right?”

“Shut up Brad.” You wanted to slap him silly right then and there. You couldn’t let him talk you into getting your hopes up again. The first crash hurt enough already.

“It is! You’re not a man, so how would you know what he’s thinking?” He rattled off.

“And how would you?” You fired back, irritated with him already, “Playing the man card? Really Bradley?”

“Okay, ouch… fair.” He smirked, missing the less than friendly banter back and forth in just the week he’d been gone. He’d gotten so used to you being there that he didn’t realize how much he loved your presence until he took himself out of it.

You shrugged not knowing what to say. You’d love to believe Bradley, but you just couldn’t seem to. They’d stopped in the bar four times in seven days, it felt like he was trying to make a point to you. One that you fully understood and didn’t really want to be a part of. He was choosing her. Not you.

“Come on, he likes you!”

“He’s got a very interesting way of showing it doesn’t he?” You spat out with a little too much disgust in your voice. Even if he did like you, you were annoyed with the whole thing. What were you in? Middle school?

“It’s his way of deflecting! You should know, you’ve done it long enough.” Bradley smirked more to himself than to you. Surely you couldn’t give up on the non-existent relationship before it even started? Bradley was better than that at meddling with relationships and he knew it. Just last week he got Natasha and the girl at the bar to finally strike up a conversation. Big bad Phoenix became a chicken in front of a pretty girl.

“I’m not doing this with you right now. I’ve got people to serve anyway.” You grumbled turning away from him before he could argue. You loved the man with your whole heart, but boy was he difficult. He never backed down from an argument, certainly not when he knew he was right, which he was. Bradley decided he better knock some sense into Hangman. What he didn’t realize is that it would send the Olivia girl right up to the bar where you were.

You hadn’t realized Bradley got up. That was your own fault for not keeping tabs on the loose cannon. You only realized when you heard that familiar cough behind you. A nasally cough to grab your attention. Not even having the energy to fake a smile you mumbled out a somewhat coherent, “What can I get for you?”

“You know, he doesn’t like you. He likes me.” That irrationally squeaky voice that made you want to do questionable things spoke far too confidently for you not to consider what she was saying.

You really hadn’t the energy to deal with this right now, “What are you talking about?”

“Jake. He complains about you all the time. Your attachment issues. Getting sick all the time. You seem pathetic really.”

You wanted to frown. Betrayal coursed through you. How dare he mention that to her? It felt like you were just an object to talk about not a person underneath, “Okay. Are you ordering anything or?” Was all you could think of. You tried to remain as unbothered as you could. Although, you weren’t sure if your face was playing along or not.

“No.”

“Bye.” You rolled your eyes subtly before turning to the next guest. She took the hint retuning to Jake. You were sure she interrupted whatever conversation Bradley and Jake were having as Bradley looked flabbergasted when she climbed right back into his lap. You wanted to turn away but the sheer look of horror on Bradley’s face seemed to make it all worth it.

After serving a few patrons Bradley made his way back to where he was originally sitting, waiting patiently on you. Sliding him another draft you raised your eyebrows, waiting on whatever he had to say, “Exactly what I thought. A simple deflection. An easy one.”

“Just, drop it. Tell me about your training mission?” You really didn’t want to talk about it anymore. It’s all the two of you seemed to chat about anymore. It was exhausting you; you couldn’t imagine how Bradley felt.

The two of you chatted until it got too busy to ignore your bartending duties. You felt a pit in the bottom of your stomach when you saw the two blondes leaving together later on in the night. You felt his eyes on you continuously throughout the night. What had she said to him? If she was that brash coming up to you earlier on in the night then you could only imagine what nasty things she’s said about you to him.

It hurt more than you were mad at him for telling her about you. He had to have known you felt something for him and to do this felt like he was all but rejecting you. Once Bradley left you let yourself spiral in your head but maintain that fake ass smile as you served guests.

It didn’t get better once you got home. You continued to think about what that stupid little mousy faced girl said to you, ‘he doesn’t even like you.’ Could that really be true? Were you really that fucking annoying? Sure, the sickness was a burden, but you never tried to place it on him. Fuck. You couldn’t believe you’d let Bradley right back into your head and let him convince you that.

Sleep didn’t come easily. The stress of the simple conversation placing too much anxiety on your brain. Not sleeping well with the added stress was never a good mixture for you. When you woke the next morning you felt warm, too warm. You knew what it meant but you decided to try and nap it off. That was a mistake as you woke feeling exponentially worse.

Placing the thermometer under your tongue you frowned when you read 102.6 Degrees read across. Texting Penny that you were sick you took a quick shower before finding your way back into bed. It was amazing what the human brain could do. You let yourself get so wrapped up in those little comments that your body was straight up having a physical reaction as well. Rejecting your thoughts completely.

Frustrated you tried to sleep again. Turning your phone to silent just deciding to ignore it for the afternoon. Not like anybody would be reaching out other than Penny. She’d assume you were just sleeping anyway.

When your eyes opened again the night had taken over. Sighing you popped into the shower rinsing off all the salty sweat that was coating your body. This was the worst of it when your temperature was the highest and you felt freezing. The highest the shower could go only calmed your shivers down some more. Contemplating taking some Tylenol you decided against it, letting your body fight this one off.

Laying on the couch you found a show you liked. Letting yourself drift in and out of sleep to the quiet volume from the television. You would have likely slept there the rest of the night had there not been a knock on the front door. Deciding to ignore it you closed your eyes hoping whomever it was would go away.

But they had other plans. The persistent knocks only seemed to get louder. With a huff you shuffled your feet to the door making sure to keep the blanket wrapped around you. It was far too cold out in the open air to be walking around without one.

Taking a look through the peep hole in the door you frowned seeing Jake on the other side. What in the hell did he want?

“Y/N, open up. I can literally hear you. Right there.”

Damn, were you really breathing that loud? Not really having the option you unlocked the dead bolt opening the door seeing the handsome man before you. He was dressed down, not in any Navy Uniform. You had to admit he looked damn good no matter what he was in. Hot as a pilot and maybe even hotter as a civilian.

He studied you for a second as you simply tried to keep your eyes open. Not having a clue of the time, you shuffled away from the door letting him in. Making your way back to the couch you snuggled right back into the spot you were in earlier, “To what do I owe the pleasure?” You mumbled out.

He took a seat on the opposite side of the couch, “You didn’t text me back… all day.”

“Sorry,” You sighed realizing you really hadn’t looked at your phone since about lunch time and it looked late out now, “Just been sleeping.”

He looked down, almost ashamed, “Why didn’t you call?”

You shrugged, “Didn’t think too. I don’t know. I’ve got everything I need.”

“I told you to call me when you were sick Y/N. I could’ve helped.”

This time your frowned. What was he getting at? Didn’t he have Olivia to fuck or some planes to go fly?

“Thought you were busy. Didn’t want to bother you.” It was a lie. You were too scared to bother him. To place your burden on him especially after what the blondie said the day prior. It was easier to lie than to comfort your feelings so suddenly.

“How many times do I have to tell you, you aren’t a burden Y/N. You aren’t a bother at all. I want to help you! Rooster wants to help you! Do you know how worried sick we’ve been? Penny all but begged me not to come but I couldn’t sit around that bar any longer knowing you weren’t answering your phone. You could’ve been dead for all we knew!” You winced hearing him raise his voice slightly at you.

He noticed, “I’m sorry. So sorry.” He apologized quickly.

A wave of emotions hit you all at once as you finally listened to him. You’d have probably argued back if you didn’t feel like such shit. You hummed closing your eyes while resting your head on the pillow behind you. You felt slightly guilty straight up ignoring him, but your head was pounding, and the fever was apparently raging.

You almost jumped ten feet in the air when Jake’s icy hand contacted your forehead, “Christ, Y/N you’re on fire.”

“And you’re freezing!” You pulled the covers closer hoping it would stop the shivers that erupted from your body.

“Here,” He handed you the thermometer that was on the kitchen table, “Can you check please?”

Placing the thermometer under your tongue you watched him as he watched you. The air in the room felt a little awkward for the first time. It had all usually flown so naturally between the two of you. But you were holding back on him, not letting him know why you were really truly upset… Olivia.

He didn’t look away as your eyes connected with his. He’d missed you, of course. Olivia was exactly that, a distraction from you. Because Jake was just like you. He didn’t think you’d ever give him the time of day. With your background and skillset, you’d be an asset to any relationship. Bradley even tried to talk him into admitting his feelings for you.

He was almost successful. Right before Jake was going to coming to admit his feelings and ask you on a proper date he chickened out and sat on the beach instead. That’s where he met Olivia. And the rest was history.

Until last night. Olivia got in his ear about you. Tried to say bad things before he shut them down right then and there. He reluctantly left with her when she asked him to. It was early and she could sense the irritation coming off of him. Jake broke the weeklong fling off as they walked the beach. He couldn’t stand the thought of even being friends with someone who could be so cruel to you.

He was going to tell you the next night, but you never showed up. You always worked the Saturday evening shift. Almost every bartender did. He barely got an answer out of Penny before he bolted for the door heading straight for your apartment.

You were lost in thought when the thermometer beeped. 103.2 degrees. Whew, that was warm for an adult. You hadn’t recalled the last time your temperature had actually gotten that high. Oh well, you’d just have to deal with it.

“Have you taken any Tylenol?”

You shook your head mumbling out a soft, “No.”

He sighed, “What the hell Y/N? If you aren’t going to call you have to take care of yourself.”

This time your returned the sigh. Tired of the act. He couldn’t really care for you like that. Not even as a friend. Especially if that Olivia said was true, “Why do you care?” You let out a little more coherently. It wasn’t like you to pick fights, but you were confused, truly.

His eyes crinkled downward as he took in your question. Gently, he sat down beside you, “Why would you say that?”

A slight flush coated your cheeks, he seemed so damn genuine, “Olivia… she came up to me yesterday when Bradley came to you. She went on and on about how annoying you thought I was. How attached I was. How being sick was… the worst or something.” You looked down, not having the slightest bit of courage to look up at him.

“And you believed her?” His frown deepened as he considered your words.

You sighed feeling slightly embarrassed about the whole thing, “Yeah, I mean she’s convincing… I guess.”

“Hey,” He took your chin in your hand, “You know that’s not true right.”

You nodded, loving the feeling of your head in his hand, “Yeah.”

“That doesn’t sound very convincing, Y/N.”

“I’m sorry… she’s just better than me. Prettier than me. Smarter…”

“Stop,” He shook his hand giving your chin a gentle squeeze. Not willing to hear such negativity come from your mouth, “First off, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for making you feel that way. You don’t get to see yourself from my view. How pretty you look when you smile at customers. How smart you sound when your just casually chatting with people. How easily you seem to connect with people. You’re so much more than what you see yourself as. Your not perfect, nobody is, but you’re damn near close to it.”

If you didn’t feel like you were going evaporate from the fever you were sure your cheeks would be inflamed. But your exhaustion and the heavy conversation seemed to dull your senses a bit, “You really think that?” It took a moment for you to process but once you did you were floored. Jake thought so highly of you?

“Of course, you’re incredible Y/N. You might not believe it, but I do. I see it every day. Olivia was nothing. A distraction from you. I was scared.”

“Of what?” Your eyes fluttered between opened and closed. Not seeming to be able to keep them in one state. You so desperately wanted to keep the conversation going. You were finally broaching the feelings subject. Of course, your fucking body would throw you out of whack when he tried to do so.

“You rejecting me.” He answered all too honestly.

You laughed a little, “I’d never reject you Jake. I’d never feel good enough for you if we’re being honest.”

He took your hand in his gently giving it a squeeze, “You’re more than enough Y/N. Everything I’d ever need.”

Blinking away the tears that Jake inevitably brought on you realized you must not have been successful as you felt his thumb brush away one that escaped, “Don’t cry sweetheart.”

You looked up seeing his overly concerned face. Oh, how soft Jake Seresin could be when he wanted to, “Happy tired tears.” You laughed softly feeling the day and conversation fully catch up with you.

“Come on,” He pinched your side forcing your eyes open, “Let’s get you to bed.”

You shook your head, “I’m good here. Comfy and too tired to move.”

“That’s what I’m here for darling.” Jake didn’t waste anytime laying it on thick. He was a romantic after all.

Without listening to your reservations, he scooped you up with ease. Gently, he laid you down in bed tucking you in under the covers.

“Jake?”

“Yeah?” He smiled looking down at you.

“Can you stay?”

“I thought you’d never ask.” He chucked diving into bed next to you. He pulled you close into him. He’d normally be warmed but you were rocking with your fever at a higher temperature.

“Night Jake.” You sighed enjoying jakes slightly cooler temperature.

“Goodnight. See you in the morning beautiful.”

Tag List: @senjoritanana @blackcatdhisgf @ohgodnotagainn @havlindzk @alana4610 @greasemonkeydarling

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fayeandknight · 6 months ago

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Something I've been chewing over is Forte's work as a service dog, or rather how I utilize him as one.

I put so much time and effort into training him and, aside from the odd outing or event, I really only take him on grocery runs.

Don't get me wrong, he is amazingly helpful to have on them and I've been able to improve my diet because of him. He's also super helpful at home. But a big part of my drive in training a service dog in the first place was to make my world bigger. To give me the ability to do the things I want.

I had that with Faye. We went shopping for clothes so I could wear things that made me feel good about myself instead of just whatever t shirt and leggings were clean. We went to movies and the zoo. Heck I had a membership to the semi local aquarium because of how often I went. And while human company would have been nice, it was so life affirming to be able to enjoy those things on my own terms.

And I really don't do that with Forte. Not because he isn't capable of it, he proves that he is any time I "dust off" his public access skills and go somewhere. Like today I got out of work early so I stopped at the mega mall on the way home, just to see how he'd do and refresh his training in a bigger/busier place. He did amazing. He switched between casual heeling and fmp as directed, ignored the people calling to him, alerted in a timely manner, and after an hour of wandering around - led me to my car in the giant parking lot. And he did it all happily. Nothing bothered him, not the flashing lights of an arcade, not the toy gun range, not the indoor bounce house, none of it.

So why don't I utilize him more?

When I sit myself down and really think through it, it's internalized ablism.

When I lived further from my family I was free from their direct input on deciding to go out and do things with a service dog. Now that I'm with them again, I live with their constant pushback around bringing my service dog. They want to go out to eat, but do I really have to bring him? It's such a hassle and really they're family and that should be enough for me. They want to see a play but there's no need to bring the dog when we're going together. And on and on until somewhere along the way I just started opting out of going because it was easier.

No amount of 'but we're your faaamily' changes my disabilities or benefit of having a service dog. But I've grown so accustomed to anticipating complaints that I talk myself out of going now before they can.

And honestly I'm pretty disappointed in myself to come to this realization. I don't want my life to consist only of home, basic errands, work, and nothing else. I worked so hard to give myself an avenue of independence and I'm wasting it.

So here's my pledge to myself. I will do more. I will go to places and enjoy the world again. I will visit the library and bookstores and cafes more than every once in a blue moon. I will see that really interesting museum exhibit. I will go to the aquarium because I absolutely love it.

I'm going to focus on easing him back into working more frequently out and about and for longer durations first. But I am also going to trust him more to do the job I worked so hard to train him for. The job he shows me he loves at every opportunity.

It's past time to start living life again.

#personal #personal growth #or something like that #maybe #hopefully #belgian tervuren #forte #psychiatric service dog #service dog #this is mostly me yammering at myself as i work through things #i just hate how small i let my world become again #i want to go to the aquarium so badly in particular #and there's no good reason i can't #I've just been letting internalized bullshit hold me back

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super-unpredictable98 · 4 months ago

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The Eighth Child (~TUA AU~) - Season 4

Chapter 1: Your Dreams Came True, Now What?

Warning: Strong language, guns

a/n: Hello everyone! I really missed The Eighth Child and I hope you all have as well. We can all agree this season was pure bullshit, so here I am with a very short series of chapters to fix it. Welcome to the final show, hope you all like it <3 also thank you so much @jozstankovich for supporting me and being my guinea pig beta reader

(The Eighth Child Masterlist)

"Of course we're coming, Dieguito!" Victoria said on the phone while trying to tame Fortune's big curly mane. "Tunnie is very excited to play with Gracie and the twins. Alright, see you later!"

"Lunch is ready," Klaus called from the kitchen. He wore a frilly apron on top of his completely normal and absolutely not flamboyant outfit. "No no no! Fortune, don't run, we don't wanna get hurt, right?"

"Right, a safe girl is a happy girl!" She repeated what her father always said.

Something about the pandemic mixed with Fortune growing into her own person, realizing Victoria was no longer indestructible, and Klaus staying fully sober, made him into a complete nut job. He was scared of absolutely anything and everything that could harm him and his family. The idea of dying and not being there to raise his kids was too much for him to even think about.

"You too, Liebling, you're in no condition to run," he caressed her baby bump.

Victoria and Klaus started off their married life as happy as can be, but the real world was right ahead and with his new sobriety and paranoia, it became harder and harder for her to... how should one put it... feel attracted to him.

Klaus was a completely changed man, his wife didn't necessarily like that. But alas, every once in a while, they still had some romance and of course she got pregnant by chance one of those times.

"I'm not sick, Klausie. Don't you remember when I was pregnant with Fortune and we would party all night in the clubs near campus? I was fine and so is she."

"I know, I know, but we were totally irresponsible! The world was different too, no COVID for starters..." He shivered before taking a bite of his risotto.

Victoria sighed, looking at the several cardboard boxes surrounding them. Right after marrying, she used her saved money to rent the apartment she used to rent back in her college days with Klaus, she loved that place and it was special to begin their new lives there.

After about a year, she made enough money with her bakery for a downpayment on the apartment. But now with their second child on the way, it wasn't viable to live in such a tiny place, even though it hurt to let it go.

"Something wrong, Mommy?" Fortune asked, seeing her mother's face. Sadness, conformity, longing, and a little disgust in her eyes.

"No, baby, I'm okay," Victoria sighed, but her husband also noticed that look. It had started about two and a half years ago when he was really focused on his sobriety journey, she seemed to simply lose interest in the person he was becoming.

Every morning, he woke up afraid she'd be gone. Every day when she left for work, he was scared she'd meet someone more exciting that would fill that void he unwillingly left behind. He was terrified she'd leave him like she did back when they were younger.

"Hey, Schatzi, since Fortune is having that sleepover with Gracie tonight, we should do something special," Klaus suggested.

"Like what?" She gave him that vacant look like she was dead inside.

"Romantic dinner, watching a movie, some... special cuddles," he winked.

"Sure," she sighed. Something horribly dangerous happens when your dreams come true... You're stuck with them.

"Die Hard!" Diego opened the door to Brigaderia Oito, Victoria's bakery. "How's it going? How's Klus?"

"It's alright, he's... sober," she mumbled. "Ah Dieguito, married life isn't what I signed up for."

"Trouble in paradise, huh? It's tough, marriage is hard work. I feel like everything I do is meaningless, but in the end, we're with the people we love, and we have amazing kids. We built something good."

"I guess so," she nodded, giving him his usual carrot cake with gooey brigadeiro on top. "I just wish Klaus would go back to being... Klaus. Not the drugs you know, but the wild nature, it's like he's broken. We barely ever have sex anymore."

"Ew! I don't wanna hear about that!" Diego pretended to gag. "My two siblings having sex? Barf!"

She rolled her eyes and placed her hand on her belly before turning to get Grace's birthday cake. She baked it and decorated it herself with cute jungle animals.

"Oh, it looks amazing!" He gasped. "How much do I owe you?"

"Nothing, it's part of her present. Only the best for my goddaughter."

"Thank you so much, Vicky," he smiled, giving her a hug over the counter and giving her belly a pat. "Already know if it's a girl or a boy?"

"Not yet, we'll get to know on the next ultrasound."

"Hope it's a boy this time, my little man needs more friends, he's drowning in estrogen."

She huffed and gave him a playful shove. "Keep the cake in the fridge."

"Thanks a million, Vicky! I'll see you later."

"See you later," she turned to pick up the phone. "Hello, Brigadeiria Oito, how can I help you?"

"It's me, Schnucki!" Klaus said into the phone. "I just picked up Fortune from school, she choked on the pulp of her orange juice."

"What? Is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's okay now, she just had a little coughing fit and was back to normal... it's just, that she got scared and wanted to come back home."

"Klaus! I can't believe you pulled our daughter out of school because she lightly choked on juice! You're gonna ruin her with all this coddling!"

"She was scared!"

"Because she sees you scared all the damn time!"

"We can talk about this later after the party. She's here now and listening."

"Why did you put me on speaker?"

"Holding a cell phone close to your ear isn't good because the temperature-"

"JESUS CHRIST! SHUT UP!" She shouted and only then she noticed there was a client waiting for her. "Just a second, I'll be with you in no time..."

"Why are you like this? Pregnancy hormones driving you crazy?" He asked.

"No, Klaus, you are! Talk to you later, I have to work... someone has to work in this household!"

"Why is Mama mad at you?" Fortune asked as she rode in the back of Allison's car with Claire and her father to the party venue.

"Mama is nervous because she's pregnant, that makes mommies a little angry sometimes," Klaus said, adjusting her seat belt for the millionth time.

"She said it wasn't because of the baby."

"Alright... you know, sometimes daddies and mommies fight, my Tunnie baby, but that doesn't mean it's forever and it doesn't mean something bad is gonna happen."

"What if you two split?" The little girl frowned.

"That's not happening, your parents have been attached at the hip since they were toddlers," Allison chuckled. "It was kinda disgusting."

"If you're Aunt Vicky's sister and Uncle Klaus' sister... does that mean they're siblings too?" Claire asked.

"That's a very long very lovely story for when you're a little bit older, Claire-bear" Klaus said before turning back to his daughter. "My little princess, don't worry about mommy, okay? I'm always here for you, and she'll always be here for you too, we love you more than the entire universe. It's just that things changed a little, but nothing that cannot be fixed."

"Hey, guys!" Victoria waved at them once they parked, she was bringing four boxes of party sweets, Brazilian style of course... beijinho, brigadeiro, bicho de pé, ninho e nutella, casadinho.

"Hey! Hey! Don't go around carrying that! You're in no condition!" Klaus took his car helmet off and rushed to help her with the boxes.

"Relax, she's pregnant, not dead," Lila came right behind with the huge bottles of soda.

"Leave it to me," he insisted.

Once they were inside, Grace and the twins came running to meet Claire and Fortune. Victoria hugged her nieces and nephew, as did Klaus before Diego gave them a look and pointed with his eyes to the doll house which was secluded and empty.

"We need to talk," she mumbled.

"Yeah... don't take your eyes off Fortune, Claire," Klaus asked. "Don't let her eat or drink anything with red 40 or 4-MEI!"

"You say as if we didn't sneak out at least three times a week to stuff our faces with doughnuts at Griddy's..." Victoria sighed as she pulled him to the doll house.

"We had superpowers and it was a different time, we were young and dumb."

"We enjoyed life," she sat down on a tiny pink chair. "We don't need to feed our child crack, but if she drank a little coke once in a while, she'll be fine!"

"What happened to us?" He looked up with puppy eyes. "We haven't fucked since we conceived this baby, you look at me like I'm a pile of cow shit, you turn your face when I go to kiss you..."

"It just hurts to see what you became. This isn't the man I married. You need therapy."

"This again? No therapy! I don't need it and we probably can't afford it."

"You're going insane!"

"Give me a chance, okay? I promise I'll make it right tonight when we get home."

She nodded, wanting more than anything to believe him. "Alright, let's see about tonight."

When the couple left the doll house, the entire family was already there, well almost the entire family.

"Oh give me a break... fake Ben is here? Who invited him?" Victoria huffed, she never really accepted Sparrow Ben as a part of the family, because he wasn't. She was even a little happy when he was arrested, meaning he'd stay away.

"Believe me, I didn't wanna be here either," he rolled his eyes.

"Come on guys, no fighting!" Luther emerged from the ball pit. "It's a family night."

"Yeah, you're right, can't let him ruin it... Cincooooo!" She went to hug Five. "Look at you, all grown up! It's like every day you get bigger, come here, little CIA man!"

"I'm not a damn child, you know?" He reluctantly hugged her back. "And I'm not little!"

"Where's Viktor?" She asked.

"He said he was coming," Luther smiled.

"Victoria, can we go outside for a little bit? I'm hyperventilating, this place is so full of people and nobody's wearing a mask," Klaus whispered.

She shook her head defeated. "Just take deep breaths, honey, it's okay. Did you see fake Ben is back? Look, our brothers are here, we're still waiting for Viktor though."

"Vicky!" Diego called from a corner while holding a piñata.

She was happy to leave Klaus to calm down for a moment and join her other brother. "What's up?"

"Does this look like a West Side piñata to you? I mean, it's clearly East Side, right?"

"Um... what's the difference?"

"The fringe, the eyes, the colors! And the fact that Lila told me she'd be on the West Side today and this looks like an East Side piñata."

"Oh Dieguito... don't overthink, it's probably a misunderstanding, let's not jump to conclusions, alright?"

"Maybe you were right, you know? I work all day and it kills me, the kids suck whatever energy I have left, and the in-laws... I'm glad they're alive in this timeline, but I don't want them living in our house."

Victoria nodded, understanding the feeling, but she didn't want their marriage to end because of her own doubts.

"Hey, cariño, come on... I know I didn't like Lila when you first got together, but she really grew on me. She's a good mom and she really loves you. It's just a rough patch."

"Liebling, please... can we step out just a little bit?" Klaus approached them.

Accepting her fate, she nodded and took his hand so they could get some fresh air. But the moment she stepped out, she knew something was wrong, there was a wrapped gift on the pavement and she picked it up.

"From Uncle Viktor?" She read the card.

"Why would he leave the gift on the street and take off?" Klaus wondered.

She started looking around for clues and after some inspection, she found a note on her windshield.

"Your brother Viktor has been kidnapped. Follow my exact instructions and no harm will come to him," she read the contents of the note. "Fucking shit cunt ass motherfucker... let's get the others."

After leaving Lila's parents in charge of the party, the old Hargreeves clan and Lila jumped into Diego's van and they headed to the address written on the note.

"Everyone stay behind me, I got a gun," Five announced, pulling his revolver as they entered the dry cleaner corresponding to the number they were given.

"Did you bring a gun to a children's birthday party?" Klaus hissed, his face covered by a gas mask. "Can you smell this? This place is a chemical wasteland."

"Says the man who made me swim in the fucking sewer six years ago," Victoria huffed.

"It's Viktor!" Luther pointed at the short man tied up to a chair with a bag over his head.

She ran and got the bag off. "Oh hey, Vik, long time no see!"

"Hey Vic yourself..." he mumbled as she started untying him with the help of Luther.

"Who kidnapped you? Dad and his goons?" She asked.

"I doubt it, this is amateur hour," Five shook his head.

"I apologize if my methods are a little crude, but it's my first kidnapping," A man came from the back. He looked harmless enough, but he held a gun, so out of instinct, Victoria stood in front of Klaus like a shield. "Hopefully it'll be my last, but I need your help."

"Kidnapping our brother and pointing a gun at us won't buy you much goodwill," Five murmured, pointing his gun at the man.

"It was the only way I could make sure you came here, all of you. I couldn't leave anything to chance, especially when it comes to the Umbrella Academy."

"Wow, haven't heard that name in years!" Victoria scoffed.

"Sorry pal, the Umbrella Academy doesn't exist," Five said.

"Only in our hearts," she completed.

The man put the gun down and opened a box full of artifacts, pictures, newspaper articles, masks, action figures...

"Oh look! The time we saved the Eiffel Tower! Remember?" Vicky smiled. "Zombie Gustav Eiffel!" She said in a silly voice.

"Where did you get this?" Diego asked.

"It was all in this box in the back of my daughter's car. Her name is Jennifer."

"Ugh, I hate that name," Victoria groaned, she had hated this name since the incident that took her brother's life.

"I don't know where she got it, but about a year ago she met these new friends and she started going to these strange meetings. Some very strange people, call themselves The Keepers. And then over time, she stopped talking to me, I believe something terrible happened, because we were very close."

Klaus picked Dave's dog tags from the box and frowned, which made Victoria's blood boil. She was very understanding of that whole thing when it happened, but lately, she didn't need much to get angry at him.

"Put that shit back!" She snagged the chain from his hands and threw it in the box.

"Sorry, sorry..." He mumbled.

"How did you find us?" Luther asked.

"I saw you on TV, Toss N' Wash," the strange man pointed at Allison.

"Ha! See? No small parts," Klaus poked his sister's shoulder.

"I've been watching you for a while actually and I apologize. I'm so sorry! I know you'd probably kill me if you could," the man looked at Victoria. "But she's all I have left, you must know what that feels like."

"I actually do," she sighed. "But we're not the same as we were, we don't have powers anymore."

"Yeah, we're not special," Diego agreed.

"Speak for yourself, tubby," Ben whispered under his breath and earned a punch in the shoulder from Victoria.

"I might not have powers, but I can kick your ass!"

"Give us 24 hours, we'll find your daughter," Five took the box quickly.

"Yes! Thank you!" The man cried. "Thank you very much, Umbrella Academy! I think you're special!"

"Five! What are you doing?" Allison hissed, following him outside. "You know we can't help, why did you do that?"

"Because... of this," Five pulled out a jar of marigold from the box.

"What I wanna know is how the daughter of a dry cleaner ends up with a jar of marigold in the trunk of her car," Five wondered.

The siblings decided to grab dinner at a Japanese restaurant and discuss their theories.

"Could it be something to do with Dad?" Klaus clumsily shoved rice into his mouth with the chopsticks (because of course, raw fish was too dangerous to eat with all the contamination risks)

"No, he took away our powers, and for good reason," Victoria shook her head.

"How do we know that's not just glow stick juice?" Diego teased.

"For the sake of discussion, let's say this is legit. Does anyone here actually want their power back?" Five asked.

"No way!" Klaus yelped. "For the first time in my life, I'm sober... and happy. And most importantly 100% poltergeist free."

"You're anything but free, you don't leave the house and you wear gloves and a mask in public," Victoria pointed out.

"At least I'm in control."

"Hmm I smell divorce," Ben taunted.

"Shut the fuck up! You're not even one of us, fuck off," she grabbed the jar of marigold and held tightly to it.

"It's a hard no for me too. I have a bar, a life..." Viktor quickly said to end the discussion.

"You're all such losers, we should be mainlining this shit right now!" Ben groaned.

"Whoever wants powers back, raise your hand!" Victoria stood up. Nobody raised their hands except Ben.

"We have everything we need," Lila shrugged.

"Damn right, and as much as I hate Dad, he's extremely intelligent. He took away our powers because they were the cause of apocalypse after apocalypse after apocalypse. This way we are safe and the world is safe. Majority wins and I'm taking this cause I don't trust you, little weasel." Victoria shoved her finger in Ben's face. "Now let's go home, and stop flossing in public, Klaus, fucking disgusting. You're not making me wanna have sex with you any more by being gross."

Tag List: @salvador-daley @seanfalco

#umbrella academy fanfic #umbrella academy klaus #umbrella academy #tua #tua fanfic #tua au #tua klaus #klaus hargreeves #klaus hargreeves x oc #fanfic #robert sheehan fanfic #robert sheehan character fic

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sunny-mercya · 6 months ago

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Rough Day

Steve McGarrett x Male Reader

Fandom -> Hawaii Five-0

Masterlist

A sinking feeling, which had settled into the deep pit of Steve's stomach—making it rumbling and twirling in an uncomfortable feeling, almost like vomit (and maybe it is it)—had settled free a greedy needing—none temptation with the sickly sweet mind alluring whispers—just desperate urgency, to drink as much Whiskey and Rum—and perhaps any other hard liquor in a big mixing—tonight, till Steve blacks out into an alcoholic poisoned coma.

Stepping into his house, Steve kicked his shoes off—not caring to put them onto the rack, how's he supposed to do and should—venturing into the kitchen, discarding his gun and badge—tossing them with carelessly onto the counter, creating a echoing thud—Steve racked through the cupboard for his special glas.

Sighing out a heavy breath, Steve goes into the living room—Television still on, meaning his husband still awake and Steve dreaded it to face you—crouching down to the small cabinet, clicking off the child-lock and taking out the best looking bottle.

Steve poured himself some Whiskey before stopping halfway and deciding to drink straight from the bottle instead.

Sitting here on the carpet floor, staring at the television—some drama and romance series being shown—and Steve thinks, while taking two more gulps of the heavy throat burning vanilla coated liquor, just how rough his job could be sometimes and just how cruel this world in reality is.

Sometimes Steve also wonders if he should even continue with what he does—the job he loves to do for living, to bring justice and arresting criminals—having thought about to maybe go into another field career of job, something more less dangerous and harmful—in both, psychical and mental ways—like being a teacher at the police academy or some office job perhaps.

But those fleeting thoughts of another career—to have a more peaceful life and not putting his family in any sort of endangerment—are always pushed back into the depths of mind, never starting to occur back again in his daily routine—till today.

Steve didn't know himself how deep he was in the clusters of his racing mind—like a hurricane through a highway—and how many bottles of Whiskey and Rum he drank—while watching without any focus those shows on the television—but when he heard your voice, glancing at your direction, Steve thought you're nothing but a hallucinations and came to the conclusion he did drank more than just above average amounts.

~~~

Coming down into the living room—after comforting your youngest son from a nightmare and then hopping quickly into the shower—you were surprised to see Steve sitting there, because he normally greets you when he comes home.

What also surprises you—and causes a spark of worry—were the empty bottles of Whiskey and Rum next to him and Steves unfocused gaze.

Of course Steve does drinks sometimes—one to three glasses—be it either of celebrations—because they solved a case or took down a high ranking criminal successfully—or when one of his days did get a bit rough, but never in such a excessive amount.

Taking the empty bottles and the half-full one from Steve hands—he does protest about it, grunting in a whine—you walked into the kitchen, throwing them into the trash—giving a short glance at the open laying gun, before resuming back to Steve.

Sitting down next to your husband, patting his knee for attention—Steve doesn't respond tho, gaze still drawn to the television or the space next to it.

»You okay Steve?« you asked and when Steve turned his head to you—eyes brimming, the minimal lights made it look like a glistening, with tears—whispering a „No.“ you knew something must've happened at work to make Steve greedily chucking down liquor.

Putting an arm around Steve, you pulled him into a hug—caressing your fingers through his short hair, humming a bit to yourself and moving his head so it's laying against your chest.

»You wanna talk about it?«

»Today was such a shit show. Fucking protected a Teenager, but turned out that asshole was a murder.« Steve voice shook with up flaring anger, clutching onto you—balling his hands into fists.

Steve still felt the heaviness of burning vanilla on his tongue, mouth a bit drying out by now—licking over his lips, inhaling your fresh shower scent—it's a mix between his own soap and yours—fumbling with his mind, before he starts to retell about his day.

»And then when I looked through all these photos of the children, which had went missing and being killed off, by the that monster I even protected at first and I just....just—« Steve stopped, his voice shaking with every breath he takes—inhaling deeply and slowly, wanting to slow down his marathon beating like heart. To no avail.

The first sobs racked through Steve body and you pulled him closer to you—kissing his forehead, telling him—in whispers, softly—that it is okay to let it all out and not to feel fine.

»It's okay, Steve, it's all okay. I'm here, I'm here love.«

Seeing Steve—your ever so strong husband and who's a reservist Navy Seal's Commanding Commander—breaking down, like crystal glass, shots a stinging throbbing through your heart as Steve is a man who had never cried.

It's your turn now, to giving him the most attentional care and support you could give him, being there for him—just like he had done the many times before to you.

»....And I just...just got flashes of our own children.....and it just hit me, so damn hard, that they could be become victims too.« Steve voice faded out, sobbing even more—body racking with shudders and Steve curls up onto your lap like a newborn child afraid of the unknown world.

You might couldn't relate to these experiences and situations Steve has to go through everyday as your aren't a Cop or anything else in that category of job—although Steve likes to say, more than often and still wondering if he meant it teasingly, that you were born and trained to kill—but you could understand his fears and the anxiety Steve currently feels.

You always fear for your children, parents always does—but you told yourself as long as Steve is out there, doing his job, they will be a little safer than before—but Steve himself was constantly confronted with such scenes of what's to be feared, pressures and pushed back anxieties bouldering upon his shoulder—so Steve breaking down, crumbling into a mess, was bound to happen at some point.

~~~

It was around early morning, sun started to rise up every so slowly, when could convince Steve to move into the bedroom—a beds much more comfortable than the carpet floor.

Laying in bed—you had tucked Steve into blankets, before going under them yourself—you had taken Steve once again into your arms, holding close—not wanting him to feel as if he's alone with his problems.

Steve had cried himself into sleep, exhaustion from yesterday sweeping within—face red and blotchy with tears.

Maybe you could convince Steve to stay in today, having a day of rest—minds off from the work and body relaxing from the tensions—Steve deserved one, needed it.

Grabbing your phone, you searched for Danny's number—sending him a quick SMS, knowing Danny wouldn't mind and even agreeing to your request.

And when Steve woke up—with tiredness still weighing in his limbs and eyes heavy with sleep—he wonders why you haven't woken him up yet, considering that is after lunch now.

Getting out of bed, he sees your sleeping form next to his now empty space and his youngest children all cramped next to you—apparently a stay inn day, Steve muses.

Steve lets you sleep, walking out of the room and down into the kitchen—noticing his older kids being at home too and lounging around in the living room.

»Hey, why you all home and not in school? Also, why didn't someone wake me?«

»Pa said to let you sleep, saying you need some day off and we're having two days of family time«

Steve only hummed, making his way back up stairs—the minimal throbbing headache was a reminding recall of what he did yesterday and Steve felt a good level of embarrassment about it.

Getting back into bed—because some more sleep sounds like a good idea—Steve carefully moves the kids around, wanting to cuddle with you—appreciating your thoughtful gesture.

And Steve felt the most happiest to have you.

#male reader #x male reader #fanfiction #malereader #xmalereader #oneshot #steve mcgarrett #steve mcgarrett x male reader #steve x male reader #hawaii 5 0 #hawaii five 0

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old-skyguy · 2 months ago

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Thoughts on episode 54 because I am very normal about the character development of this show.

Spoilers for FMA Brotherhood. Up to episode 54, at least.

The parallels between Mustang and Scar.

The fact Scar had his whole family, his nation, his culture, taken away from him and he chose violence and retribution and destruction over trying to help what remained of his community.

The fact Mustang had his friend taken away, had to watch this man who cared so deeply get killed and see the aftermath for his family. How it must've felt to slowly realize that he did that same thing to scar and so many other innocent people to further fuel a corrupt web of lies that benefits no one but the ones weaving it. The guilt. The anger. How he wanted so badly to take it out on something, on someone, just like Scar did.

Except Scar had been changed too. Riza sees this. Riza has had to live with this guilt for a fucking *while* and I mean they all have to an extent, but none of the other military understand the gravity of the situation like she does. They can all tune it out, believe that they're doing this for their country or for the greater good, but she doesn't have that luxury . Her tattoo directly resulted in the sheer power used as violence against so many innocent people.

You know who ELSE has a tattoo that represents the hard work of a family member in the name of innovation that ultimately became a weapon never meant to be wielded?

SCAR. SCAR DOES.

He resorted to blind carnage as well. He killed off good men, people with families, with deeper aspects to them besides their part in the war, and ultimately many, many innocent people, whose deaths impacted the lives of those around them and devastated them as much as his own family's. And you know what??

He was RIGHT to be angry at the government.

He was RIGHT to be angry at the military.

That doesn't mean he had the right to blindly kill anyone in uniform. It's an absolutely brilliant juxtaposition between two extreme sides of the same coin. Such a poignant commentary on military vs terrorist ideals and how they're both just inherently wrong and dehumanizing to the very people they stand for, but both refusing to take responsibility for their wrongdoings.

Until Scar realizes how his idea of revenge affected other people, innocent people just like him, just like his family, just like the life of the child that sparked the fucking war. And he steps back. Slowly, he becomes more willing to work together, more aware of what is actually behind this, more patient with the people he once swore revenge on. Because with military, even in real life, there's always like several degrees of separation between the people who control the narrative and control the war from the conference rooms and the people who are ordered to pull the trigger. That doesn't mean he isn't allowed to be angry at the ones behind the gun, it's just that he should be more worried about the people behind the battlefield. God, this show's politics and depictions of war are so realistic and just dead on. I could talk about it for hours.

Mustang almost went down that same path of misdirected retribution. He was so close it was literally UNDER HIS FOOT. But seeing how this affected Scar, how it affected Hughes and his fellow soldiers and Al and Ed and how it affected RIZA. Seeing how she was willing to kill herself just so *his own* destructive powers could die with her.

How Envy was just a byproduct. He was always depicted as this scary, blood-shedding, horrific creature of carnage, which *is* what he's supposed to represent, but I feel like in the moment he realized just how small Envy really was, he feels for a brief moment what it was like for Scar to learn that. It was pointless to take all his anger out on the person who was created specifically to BE a weapon - just a weapon - and nothing more. Who was created to act as a blind, uncaring soldier in a war that they don't even really have the ability to comprehend. That he should save his anger for the system that created him, the system that blinded him to the truth and never let him learn empathy. Never let him be a person Just like the dehumanization of war.

It doesn't help anyone to withhold mercy from the one who executed another's will. It would be just like Scar killing soldiers, it does NOTHING about the real issue and so he'll save it for the real man behind the slaughter.

And Jesus envy as a deconstruction of that system. Brilliant. I love it. Being so confused by the mindset of the people on the opposing side and rather than confronting the fact that maybe he was on the wrong side this whole time and confronting his humanity (philosopher's stone) and trying to remedy himself like Scar and all the other State Alchemists that fought the Ishvalan War he kills himself (also with the philosopher's stone) out of fear and a warped sense of honor and loyalty to a cause he doesn't even grasp.

That could've been Riza. That would've been her if Mustang decided to go through with killing Envy himself. If he chose selfish retribution over those affected by tragedy and government corruption. But it wasn't.

He chose to focus on the bigger picture of who's at fault instead of blindly killing out of rage.

And that is the ideal leader.

Because a tyrannical, angry leader stuck in the past is a horrible leader. It's just as bad as a cold blooded murderer, and eventually, they'll become the very thing that broke them.

He would've perpetuated the cycle.

He came **so close** to perpetuating the cycle that it's honestly terrifying.

But he didn't.

The character growth showcased here is *masterful.*

I could go on but I'd just repeat myself, I'm like a dog chasing it's tail.

Inject it into my ***veins***.

#fma #fmab #envy fullmetal alchemist #fullmetal alchemist #fullmetal alchimist brotherhood #fma brotherhood #envy fmab #riza hawkeye #riza hawkeye fmab #roy mustang #roy mustang fmab #scar #scar fmab #envy #state alchemist #ishval #ik im being annoying with the tags but i need this to reach people i need you guys to hear me as i shout crazed ramblings from my soapbox #i love this show i love overanalyzing things it makes me so happy #analysis my beloved #i love being annoying to the void it doesn't mind if i shout at it it welcomes it #ESSAYS <33 #CHARACTER ANALYSIS<33 #FORESHADOWING AND SYMBOLISM <33(i am actively frolicking in the flowers.)#(dancing around in them. picking them gently and kissing them and tossing them this way and that.)#i might as well tag this as riza x roy. they can be platonic too but idk i think they work.#roy x riza #royai #they're cute :3

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novasintheroom · 10 months ago

Text

102. Hands

♡ Pairing - Vash x Reader

♡ Word count - 1k

♡ Warnings - none

Part of the 150 Bullets drabble series on AO3

Part 1 ---- Part 2 ---- Part 3 (you are here!) ---- Part 4

Don and Mac mutter to themselves across the fire. Their eyes are glazed with booze, gold and murky in the light. They’ll be out soon.

Good. You’ve had about enough of them today. Some bodyguards you are, getting drunk on the job. You shuffle your papers in your bag, carefully tucking the most vital into a hidden pocket of your overalls while they aren’t looking. They’ve been eyeing your stuff more and more each day. You suspect they’d either been hired by a rival or got it into their thick heads to make off with your findings for themselves. They’ll probably try to take the cartography drawings – and your equipment – soon. Time to switch gears and figure out a way of escape. You sigh and palm at your eyes.

It’s the way these things go. Hard to find good help these days.

Well, almost.

You look off and see the dark, purpled coat of your third bodyguard in the near distance. Vash had placed himself near the cliff’s edge, sitting and staring into nothing for the past half hour or so – messing with that pretty blue hand of his. You can vaguely hear the clinking of metal on metal, and you stand and move before you can talk yourself out of it.

The dark rocks crunch under your boots. You pick your way over the landscape. Vash doesn’t seem to notice you, but that doesn’t mean anything. He has a way of knowing things.

“Aren’t you cold?” You say in greeting. Vash’s shoulders bunch and he turns with surprise. You suspect it’s a show; he must have heard you coming long before now. Still, you stand beside him and wave. “Sorry, I should have been louder.”

He sighs and lets out a chuckle. “No, I was in my own world. Glad you pulled me out of it.” He blinks and says, “And no, I’m not too cold. Got the coat, remember?” He pulls at the red thing as a show.

“Hm, hard to forget it.” You smile when he bashfully laughs and rubs his neck. He’s cute.

“Yeah, I get that a lot.”

You feel bolder than usual tonight. Maybe it’s the knowing you’ll have to leave soon that lets you sit beside him instead of shying away. Vash watches you curiously. You give him a nervous smile and ask, “What are you working on? I can hear it from the fire.”

His own smile comes easy. He holds out his tech arm, grabbing at the wrist with his flesh one and rotating it. “Just calibrating the arm. It was a little out of sync earlier in that gun fight.” He sees the way your eyes shine at the old tech. Throwing caution away, he asks quietly, “Do you want to look at it?” His smile grows at your eager nod, moving his hand closer for you to grasp.

You take his hand gently. It’s cool to the touch. You aren’t sure why you expected it to be warm. You flip his hand over in your own, looking at all the grooves, the intricacies holding the joints and “bones” together. “This is…incredible,” you breathe. True old tech. The likes of which you haven’t seen since…Your fingers trail up to tap at each of his own tips. It follows all correct anatomy designs. There’s no give to the metal like there would be to skin. You thumb over his palm. His fingers curl slightly at the sensation. “Is…can you feel that?”

Vash nods. “Not as much as my other hand, but I can feel the pressure.” He watches your hand brush his, eyes soft. “Can feel it too when a wire gets pinched.”

You see them when he says it – nearly-microscopic lines running through the opaque metal. Those must be the wires, the “nerves.” What a fascinating piece of technology. “How do you do the upkeep for this?” You don’t even want to guess the fortune it takes to do so.

He shifts then and smiles vaguely. “Ah, I know a guy. Really good with tech like this.”

“Who? I thought I knew everyone who deals with old tech. I’m sure I would have heard about their work if they were making this!”

“Aw c’mon, you can’t know everyone. World’s a big place! Besides, I’m not in the business of telling secrets. Thought that was more your field.”

You hum. Despite his claim, you do know everyone – even the shady ones. He’s dodging, but you suppose that’s fine. I’ve only known you for two weeks, you remind yourself, and release his hand. Vash takes it back. The look on his face is gentle. He is gentle. Not often you find someone like him.

You feel your cheeks flush and look away, grateful for the dark. Darn you and your flash crushes. “Well, thank you for letting me look at it. It’s beautiful.” Your courage shrinking, you stand and dust off your pants. “I’m going to bed. Are you taking first watch?”

He nods. “I don’t think the other two can really…” he trails off and gives a sardonic smile at Don and Mac. They’ve both passed out, snoring loudly into their chests.

See, he was paying attention. You smile and wave. “Let me know when it’s my turn.”

A trailing ‘goodnight’ follows your heels. You head back to your sleeping bag, careful to check inside for any worms that may have decided to make their home there tonight. Finding none, you crawl in and face toward the fire, away from Vash.

What you don’t see is Vash rubbing his hands together and lacing fingers through fingers.

Your own hands rub together. The feeling of Vash’s metal hand will chase you into your dreams for nights to come.

#vash the stampede #trigun #trigun stampede #tristamp #writing #self insert #reader insert #vash x reader #nova writes #vash the stampede x reader #trigun x reader #150 Bullets

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