#he was born to be a gay vampire
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christiancagesupporter · 11 months ago
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how do we get swerve in interview with the vampire
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martynsimp69 · 2 years ago
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Are you a fello bigslab shipper
late 2 answer this bc ive been so busy and i wanted to write up a whole thing abt the post bu the tl;dr is that i got invested in bigslab bc of an au with my partners that involves them with a rly fun dynamic. i just havent seen it anywehre else but now im like dang. i should rotate them more
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softloustat · 1 month ago
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10 absolutely unhinged things Daniel has done
pretended to be a straight drug addict journalist to get gay sex (and drugs)
flew across the globe in the middle of a pandemic with an autoimmune disease to meet with a vampire who almost killed him last time they did this
proposed oral sex to calm down the man who was torturing him
started undressing in the middle of an interview
insinuated his interviewee's partner of 77 years is a rebound (and was right about it)
shouted at his interviewee that he could be his husband and his dead daughter at the same time, but better
had a rap just ready to go for wild reveals and actually got to use it
was immediately into the idea of having gay sex in a coffin
risked his life to break up a vampire couple of 77 years; did not exactly survive but can now claim a 200% divorce rate
is a 514 year old vampire's first born
Armand's version
Louis' version
Lestat's version
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gustdekarios · 22 days ago
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wholesome old man yaoi this toxic old man yaoi that. whatever. you will never get anywhere on this with bloodweave because thats not where they fall on the old man yaoi taxonomy. they are circumstantially toxic and circumstantially wholesome but what they are, 24/7, in every moment, is comic relief. every interaction with astarion hes on his knees begging you to laugh with him, he's evil and cunty and gay and everything he says is surface level, he pinky swears. he has so much bad luck you're beggining to suspect the real reason mirrors put a restraining order on him but he CAN and WILL make light of it all, mostly by playing it up to a comedic level. his misfortune is unmatched but so is his ability to entertain himself. you can tell he was born too early to be an ipad kid and studying law has made him immune to boredom in any way that matters. gale on the other hand is the king of underreaction. you bite his hand off, hes a bit miffed before he vanishes into the void forever. he lovingly comments on the moistnest of his mindflayer partners tentacles. he monologues about the sanctity of a wizards tower and immediately follows it up with but this wizard isnt home so lets take a look. he gets horny in the land of eternal death, misery and decay when youve all been fighting disturbing undead abominations for days. so i solemnly propose a third category, clown old man yaoi. their individual one man comedy routines combine delightfully into a two man comedy play. you have the patron saint of heebie jeebies and the guy who thinks astarion's biggest problem is his lack of manners. gale's the type of guy to tell astarion he can't watch him drain an innocent person, not because of the vampirism or moral qualms but because he thinks the slurping sounds are gross and unnecessary and not for polite company. likewise hes the type of guy to say things like goodness, today was so difficult.... first it was raining which makes my knees ache then i stepped into a puddle and then a dozen of my students accidentally vanished into the shadowfell today and i missed lunch getting them back. and it was my favourite lunch, this is so annoying...... and thats just setting the stage for astarion's overreaction routine. hes counting to 30, hes checking for cameras, hes shaking his shoulders going hey. hey. shadowfell?? SHADOWFELL??? isnt that kind of a big deal??? like genuinely its not about whether they make each other better or worse, its that they both get to prance around thinking theyre the normal, sane person in this relationship while the rest of the group goes wow. what a pair of fucking weirdos, they deserve each other
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krispycreamcake · 2 months ago
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No thoughts just Catholic church boy Yuma running away to gay vampire Shu in the forest after his parents beat him for not praying again
Broke back mountain who??
Also I really wanna make a coquette joke but someone lowkey edit Yuma to that one song
THIS ONE OMG
Everyone's always like Yui would be coquette this, Yui would be coquette that, NO.
I say, Yuma mukami is the picture perfect epitome for the American dream, he has all the D you'll ever need in Howdy pardner
Guys look tell me u guys see it
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I'm going insane it's official, someone just plz draw him the way he was born to be drawn
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connorsnothereeither · 2 months ago
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As promised, a comprehensive chronological history of Nox Bloodborn’s life as recounted by him during the Foolsbound stream:
His parents died in a car crash before he was born
Is apparently a “half vampire, half angel, half mermaid (on his mother’s side)”
Nox was raised by wolves as a child, allowing him to speak to animals “like in the Jungle Book”. He considers himself “a wolf in all ways except physical”
“The Plague” struck the world, killing everyone over the age of 32 and a 1/2
Was designated as “a the chosen one” (apparently there’s “like six of them”) by… fate or something? Was delivered to save what’s left of the world
Trained for many years under “elegant masters” in the way of the blade, where he was gifted his sword “Crimson Rivers” with which he is proficient in all forms of combat. May or may not contain the souls of his enemies.
At some point seemingly unrelated to The Plague™️, the apocalypse happened? Presumable the biblical one? From the Bible? During the apocalypse all of the other angels died, leaving Nox “the last one”
Originally started wearing white clothing, which was stained red and black by the blood of his enemies, which he drinks to satiate his dark vampire desires. His angel blood prevents him from harming an innocent being so he only drinks from wrongdoers
Has “experienced love many times” all of them fleeting and tragic
He totally has a girlfriend but she goes to a different world and you definitely don’t know her and she doesn’t have a MySpace account so DONT EVEN ASK, OKAY-
Apparently during the apocalypse he has fought or at least met The Devil many times? Enough to refer to him as both “his arch nemesis” and his “only constant friend in this eternal hellscape”
Has seen hell, and believes that the worse torment exists inside the human soul
Is not used to “social interaction with people my age”
Not entirely clear what his age is. He seems like 20ish and is definitely an adult but also claims to have been fighting the demons of hell for “decades” so I dunno maybe there’s vampire wonkiness there or something.
Spent many years combatting the “warring kingdoms” formed by the “roving malícia tribes of the wasteland”
Is on the search for his purpose as a the chosen one, which has led him on an inter-dimensional quest to save his own world and all others
Never had a childhood but has found solace and a sense of comfort and companionship in the “FNAF Style Shadow the Hedgehog Plushie” he found abandoned on the ground. He feels a connection with Shadow
IMPORTANT ADDITION
Able to throw it back in a maid dress so hard he turned The Devil gay
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within-your-eyes-if · 2 years ago
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Within Your Eyes Intro Post
DEMO [Last Updated June 22nd, 2024]
You are a Warden, a monster hunter who has come to the Kingdom of Auris which has become the forefront runner in it’s acceptance of magic and supernatural alike within the West Highlands. But when strange happenstances occur, you are called upon not just because of skill, but also because of your condition. A condition you’ve lied about for last 12 years.
Unearth the secrets that magic holds as a new form is discovered.
Befriend or romance those who attempt to worm through the cracks of the mask you wear. Or will you fight to keep them at arms length?
Regardless of where your journey takes you, your feathered friend will be at your side. As he always has been.
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This story will be 18+ for the following reasons:
Explicit and erotic intimate scenes
Death, including of a child
Violence, blood and gore
Thoughts of suicide
Mentions of suicide
Self harm
Explicit language
Mental trauma
Horror elements
Feelings of being watched
NOTE: Your character will be pretending to have a disability (blindness), not because of a disorder but out of self preservation.
This list may be updated.
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You are running away from your past. As you take a this new job, you're forced to confront it. What vices do you use to cope? Will you learn to rely on others or will your raven be your only source of comfort? Will you feel guilty for your lies? Yours will be a journey of self-forgiveness, or maybe you'll only fall deeper into despair.
Play as a man, woman, or non-binary. Gay, straight, or bi.
Plenty of customization options from physical appearance to clothes.
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Φ Admos de Le Wren ─ Male | Draconian | Second-Born
Admos, the Dragon Lord of Auris, ascended to the throne following a devastating conflict with his father, bypassing his older brother's claim. This decision deepened the rift among his siblings. As he enters his fifth year as sovereign, Admos grapples with guilt and uncertainty about his role in the family's discord. Will you help him find clarity or fuel his doubts?
Φ Lyth/Lyari de Le Wren ─ Gender Selectable | Draconian | Tenth-Born
Ly took on the role of Viceroy/Vicereine in Auris and became their brother Admos's Right Hand, playing a vital part in the kingdom's recovery after a conflict with their father. However, an incident they triggered over a year and a half ago almost led to another war, casting doubt on their suitability for their position and their aid to their brother. Will you help Ly grapple with their past actions and uncertainties about their role as Viceroy/Vicereine, or will their internal conflicts remain unresolved?
Φ Leese/Lea van Laere ─ Gender Selectable | Human | Vampire
Born into nobility, Lee's life as the child of prominent figures in Lenia took an unexpected turn when they were turned into a vampire. Forced to leave their home, Lee now wrestles with their new identity, desperately seeking meaning in their existence and if it's worth maintaining.
Is Lee a monster consumed by instinct, or can you help them reclaim their humanity?
Φ Xiang Xiaowen/Xiaodan ─ Gender Selectable | Human
Xiao, an ambassador dispatched to Auris to aid the Dragon Lord in Council matters, fought hard to secure their role. Serving as an unofficial advisor, they frequently share insights to assist Admos. Yet their unwavering dedication to obtaining this position hints at a deeper motivation. Perhaps they will reveal it to you.
Φ Gabriel Duarte ─ Gender Selectable | Human
Assigned to you as an assistant of sorts, the recently knighted guard is searching for their place within the Order. Perhaps their new mission will set them on a path for glory, or sink them beneath the turmoils it takes to obtain.
Φ Hestia ─ She/They | Elf? | Witch
Even the most kind have their secrets.
Φ Elies de Le Wren — He/Him | Draconian | Exiled Prince
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Φ Harus Emery — He/Him | Half-Draconian Half-Human | Warden
Poly Routes: Lyth/Lyari and Gabriel | Leese/Lea and Gabriel | Xiaowen/Xiaodan and Hestia
Love Triangle: Admos and Elies (Note: Will not be resolved in poly. Don't overthink it.)
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FAQ
Romance Information Post
Ko-Fi
Tumblr Asks are disabled for the time being.
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WYE will always be free with chapters released once they are finished.
This is a planned trilogy.
Thank you for reading and for your support! ♥
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resident-gay-bitch · 1 year ago
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Defiance & Desire
18+ wolfstar drabble
James and Sirius sit cross legged on the floor of their dormitory, quill and parchment between them, and lolly wrappers scattered around. 
Sirius taps his chin, listening as James reads out everything on the list so far; all things that would absolutely piss his mother off and have her rolling into an early grave if she ever found out about them. 
There are a lot of things on this list so far. 
“How about… mooning the crowd at the next quidditch match?” Sirius suggests. 
James bursts out laughing, “Merlin, Sirius. That will have Dumbledore rolling into an early grave.” 
“Good.” Sirius grinned. 
“What would Minnie say?” 
“Erm, probably… detention for the rest of my life.” He chuckled, “Oh, Minnie…. Love her.” 
James cracked a bright smile and wrote it down. 
“What else?” Sirius hummed, “I need as many as possible. It betters the chances of them getting back to her.”
“Erm…” James thought for a moment, fixing his glasses, “You could… oh, shag a muggle born… or like, a halfblood or something?” 
Sirius nodded, “Yeah, that’s good… I mean, I’ve done it, but I suppose I could do it a few more times.” 
“Oh, yeah…” James grumbled, forgetting about Sirius’ history with girls, “Ooh, you could shag a bloke. That would really send her.” 
Sirius’ eyes widened, “A bloke?” 
James nodded, “Yeah, like, ya know…” He shrugged, “I’d offer but I’m a happily committed man, Sirius.”
“Hmm.” Sirius bit his lip, thinking about it for a moment, “Add it to the list, I’ll consider it.”
James grinned and hurried to scribble it down, “Shagging… a criminal would work too… that also goes under the category of becoming a criminal. Because, you know, conspiring with them and all that.”
“Ooh, yeah, I’d shag a criminal.” 
“Or like… a creature or something.”
“I’m not shagging an animal, James.” 
James laughed, “No! Like… like a vampire or something, you know? Or a werewolf.” 
“Oh, yeah.” Sirius nodded, “That could be cool.”
“Yeah… hot, right?” 
Sirius shrugged, “Erm, I suppose. I like the muggle vampire romance books, so…”
James sighed and wrote it down, “Oh, look at that.” He hummed to himself, his tone a little playful, a little curious, “A halfblood, criminal… a creature, a bloke…” He chuckled, “You could just shag Moony.” 
“Moony?” Sirius asked, looking down at the parchment. 
James shrugged, “You’d be killing like, four birds with one stone. Your mother would be beside herself.” He laughed, “Ah, I’m just playing fun, Sirius. Obviously you’re not gonna go shag Moony. It’s not like you’re both gay or anything.” 
Sirius nodded his head, “Yeah, it would be funny though.” 
“Yeah.” James sighed, looking back at the parchment, “Ooh! Let the girls do your makeup and go have dinner in the Great Hall in a dress.” 
Sirius gasped, “Oh, James, you’re brilliant!” 
☆ ★ ☆
Sirius swings lazily on his chair, one leg propped up on his bedside table and the other just his toes touching the ground. His hair is tied back all messily, and he’s got his tie loose around his neck and a few buttons on his shirt undone. He’s humming to himself, watching the record spin and spin and spin on the table until it comes to a scratchy stop. 
With an effortless swish of his wand, the record lifts itself up and slots itself away into the Ziggy Stardust sleeve on the shelf. And then he groans, throwing his head back and exposing his long pale neck. 
Remus is going insane. 
“I’m so bored.” He whines, “Why’d she have to make my detention so late?”
“To further punish you, I suppose.” James shrugged. 
“You know, you should be thanking me. If I didn’t take the fall for you, Prongsie Boy, you’d be the bored one right now.” 
“And I’ll forever be greatful for it, shnookums.” James laughs, bouncing over to kiss Sirius sloppily on his forehead. 
Sirius yelps and nearly falls out of his chair, swatting James away, “You’re disgusting.”
“No, you are.” James says, tapping Sirius on the end of his nose like a sappy couple would, going back and forth about who’s cuter. 
Sirius rolls his eyes and smiles anyway. 
“I’ll see ya later.” James calls, “Gotta go do my rounds with Lily.” 
“Bye.” Sirius waves, and goes back to his chair swinging. 
Remus barely mutters his goodbye as he watches, and James laughs to himself as he leaves. 
It’s just them two now. Alone. In their dorm. James out for the next few hours, Peter no doubt distractedly talking with the girls for hours on end. Remus should go down and join them, he said he would, but… well, right now he’d rather watch Sirius swing on his chair. 
Besides, Sirius has to leave for his detention soon, so he can join them later. 
Sirius huffs and a shiny strand of hair flies up out of his face. It slowly settles back down, and then Sirius blows it back up into the air again. He does this a few more times, until it falls off the side of his face and out of reach, and Remus watches, entranced the whole time. 
“Moonshine?” Sirius asks, eyes squinting as he looks out the window. He’s tracking a bird as it loops around the sky. 
“Yes?” Remus squeaks out, then clears his throat and deepens his voice, “Uh, I mean, yes?” 
Sirius shrugs, “Would you ever be interested in shagging?” 
Remus feels his cheeks go red, “What?”
“Shagging?” Sirius asks, turning to look at Remus, and it’s mortifying, “Like, sex… fucking… you know?”
“Ah… yes?” Remus nods, “Yes, I’d be… I mean, who isn’t interested in sex?” He laughs nervously.
“Erm… me, I suppose.” Sirius sighs, looking back up at the roof, “I mean, I do it a lot I suppose- or, well, not that much. But, you know, more than you or Pete and the girls and stuff.”
“Right.” Remus nods.
“But I mean, it’s not that great. You know, if I never shagged again, I wouldn’t care.” 
“Really?” He asks, curious. 
“Yeah, I mean, sure, girls are gorgeous and all but… eh, you know?” 
Remus swallows, “Eh?”
“Yeah.” He shrugs, “It’s just… slimey down there. And like… I don’t understand the whole boob thing. I guess… I ‘spose it’s not really normal, so I just ignore it. But I don’t go out of my way to shag a girl unless she asks, you know?” 
“Sure…” Remus says, because he very much knows- or, well, not really. He knows he wouldn’t shag a girl no matter what, because he doesn’t like girls. So he gets that, but he doesn’t really understand if Sirius is implying the same circumstance or not. 
“Have you ever shagged anyone, Remus?” 
“No.” He swallows, “Never.”
“Oh…” Sirius nods, “But you want to?”
“Yes.” Remus nods back. 
Sirius seems to think about this for a moment, humming to himself in quiet contemplation, and Remus just watches. He has no idea what he’s feeling right now, other than downright confused and so fucking intrigued. 
“Would you ever shag me?” 
Remus chokes. He starts coughing and spluttering, cheeks red and eyes wide, “Sorry?” 
Sirius shrugs, “Sorry.” He laughs, “Didn’t mean to catch you off guard like that. But would you ever shag me?” 
“I… I mean…” Remus rubs his forehead, “I’m… I don’t…”
“Just, you know how James and I are finding things to piss my mother off?” 
“Yeah…?” 
“Well, we thought it would be good if I shagged a bloke, and a creature… a criminal, and like… a halfblood.” Sirius smiled, “You’re an unregistered half blood werewolf with a cock, so-“
“Bloody hell, Sirius.” Remus looks at him, absolutely gobsmacked. Lily will go crazy when he tells her about this conversation. “I mean… what?” 
Sirius shrugged, “I mean, it’s not like I’m gay or anything. I just know it would piss her off.”
Well, that’s disappointing. 
“So yeah, do you wanna shag?”
“Are you serious?” 
Sirius smirked. 
“I- no.” He scoffed, laughing into his hands as he hid behind them, “Are you genuinely asking me to fuck, right now, Sirius?”
“Yeah…” Sirius smiled, “Just a bit of fooling around. It doesn’t have to mean anything, and I know we’re both not gay so it’s cool. It doesn’t have to be weird.” 
“Right.” Remus nods, because he’s not gay, no, not at all. 
“Besides, imagine the bragging rights.” 
“Sorry?” Remus hummed. 
“Well, I can say I’ve fucked a werewolf, and a criminal, which is… pretty cool.” He grinned, “And you can say you’ve fucked Sirius Black.”
“Oh, you cocky bastard.” Remus groaned. 
Sirius laughed, “Imagine it, one of those girls in the halls bragging to their friends about how I’ve been inside them- and what, you’d just be able to say you’ve been inside me! Something they’d never be able to say.”
Remus’ eyebrows furrowed, “I’d be inside you?”
“Well, yeah.” Sirius shrugged, “Oh, unless you prefer it the other way around. I just think I’d prefer if you fucked me, is all.” 
Remus’ brain is short circuiting. He’s beginning to question whether or not Sirius is as straight as he claims. 
“When you said shag, I assumed you mean handjobs.” 
“Oh…” Sirius nodded, looking a little disappointed actually, “Oh, yeah, we can… we can just do handjobs if you want.” 
“Erm, no that’s okay.” Remus cleared his throat, “I can… I can, erm, do that, if you’d like.” 
“Oh, Moons, you don’t have to just do it if you don’t want. I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable.” Sirius smiled, so, so prettily.
“No, it’s okay, yeah, I’d…” Remus looked away for a moment, unable to believe he was actually having this conversation, “I’ll fuck you.”
“Oh, brilliant.” Sirius grinned, “You’re really the best, Remus. Like, my favorite person in the world. Mother will be so pissed if she ever found out- and don’t worry, I’m not just gonna go tell her. It’s just the idea of it.” 
“Right.” Remus nods. 
“So, erm… I’ve got detention, so we can’t do it now… how about tonight?” 
“To-“ Remus stops himself mid sentence and looks at Sirius aghast, “You’re just… yeah, okay, yeah.” 
Sirius hummed, “James will have his date thing in the astronomy tower by the time I get back from detention so… we just have to get Peter out of the room somehow.”
“Leave it to me!” Remus says, “I’ve got… I’ll figure it out. I’m… yeah, we’re good mates so I’ll sort it.”
“Oh, Moonbeam, you really are the best.” Sirius smiles, hopping up out of his chair and bouncing over to pet Remus on the top of his head, “Really, I owe you big time.” 
“Yeah.” Remus blushed and ducked his head, watching Sirius waltz out of the room, humming a happy tune. 
☆ ★ ☆
“Holy shit guys, I just…” Remus plops himself down on the couch between Mary and Marlene. Lily is sitting on the floor against Mary’s legs and Pete’s sitting across from her, they’re playing snap. “I… I think I’m gonna have sex with Sirius.”
All four of them went dead silent, turning slowly to look at him. 
Remus swallows and looks up, “He wants to piss of his parents and… apparently secretly having sex with me is the perfect way to do that?”
“What?” Peter gasps. 
“Yeah, my thoughts exactly, Wormy.” Remus muttered, “Erm, we’re gonna shag tonight… he wants… he wants me to shag him, tonight.” 
“Merlin…” Lily grins looking up at him, “Oh, Remus!”
Remus bites his lip, blushing, “Pete… you reckon you can clear the room tonight?” 
“Trust me, I’m staying as far away as possible.” Peter laughed, “Bloody hell, I owe James ten galleons. I really didn’t think that would work.”
“You planned this?” Remus asked, “Wait, you bet on this?”
Peter looked at him deadpan, “I’ve already made fifty galleons from winning bets on Sirius, he’s so predictable. Obviously I bet on this.” 
Remus sighs and sinks down into the sofa, “I’m going to have sex with Sirius tonight…” He looks around at them all, “How do you have sex?”
“Oh, Remus.” Lily mused. 
☆ ★ ☆
It’s just them. Just Remus and Sirius. The moment he got back from detention James was waltzing out of the room with a cheerful grin, off to his date, and Pete was following right after in hopes of finding Marlene. 
So they’re alone already, which makes things so much easier for Sirius. 
“Thanks.” He smiles, “For sorting Pete out.” 
“No problem.” Remus nodded, “He was gonna hang out with Marlene anyway.” 
“Oh, cool.” Sirius said, starting to feel a little awkward, “Erm, so, I don’t really know how this works.”
“Me either, I suppose.” Remus swallowed, “I did some research, though. Figured out some stuff.”
“Oh, Moons…” Sirius smiled, he really is the most grateful for Remus. He really is the best. He just feels so much admiration for him all the time. “You’re such a good friend.” 
“Yep.” Remus nods, “Such a good friend.”
“So like… are we just doing the sex bit, or foreplay too?” Sirius asked, hoping Remus votes for foreplay. Sirius is good at foreplay, it’s his strong suit. It’s the part he likes the best of sex, so he doesn’t want to make it weird by not enjoying any of this. 
But foreplay is what people do when they like each other, most of the time. So Sirius would understand if Remus says no to it. Like, it would be extra disappointing, but he’d get it. 
“Forplay?” Remus’ eyes widen. 
“Yeah, like… kissing and all that.” He shrugs, “Undressing each other .”
Remus swallows, “Sure.” He says, and for some reason his voice just got higher. Sirius likes when Remus’ voice does that, it’s funny and it makes him feel kinda good, like, proud in a way, but he doesn’t know why. 
“Oh, cool.” Sirius nods, acting all nonchalant when really he’s feeling very happy inside. 
“Uhm… we have to use lube.” 
“Oh…” Sirius furrowed his brow. Girls don’t need lube. He really knows less about this sex stuff than he thought. “Right, well, I think we have some of that butter left from the prank-“
“Not butter.” Remus cuts in, laughing at him, “Definitely not butter, Sirius. It’s going inside you-“
“Oh, yuck. I don’t want butter in my arse.” He grimaced. 
“Yeah, I don’t really want it on me either.” Remus laughed, “Like, sex lube.” 
“Oh…” Sirius nodded, “What’s that? Can we make it?” 
“No.” Remus smiled, turning to his bedside draw, “It’s just gel stuff, I guess. Erm, here…” He tossed a little tube over to Sirius. 
It’s see through and has a transparent slime inside, “Oh, where'd you get this on such short notice? It’s half empty.” 
Remus went red again. Sirius likes when he makes Remus go red. “Erm… cause I use it.” 
“I thought you didn’t have sex?”
“I don’t.” Remus splutters, “It’s for… wanking”.
Sirius looked down at the tube, then over at Remus’ crotch, “Oh… really? I don’t need lube when I wank- I mean, not that I wank very often, but it’s always wet enough when I do.” 
Remus’ eyes widened and he just stared at Sirius for a moment, “Right…” 
Sirius shrugged, “This sex stuff is interesting.” 
“Erm, you’ll also have to be… fingered.” Remus gritted out. 
“Can you finger blokes?” He asks, genuinely baffled as he flips the bottle of lube around in his hand absentmindedly. 
Remus nods. 
“Oh, I didn’t know that… why?”
“To make it like… big enough.” Remus nods, “You know… for…” He waved his hands wearily around his crotch. 
“Oh, yeah, I suppose it’s kinda a small hole, hey?” Sirius hummed, the pieces slotting into place now, “Cool.” 
“Yeah, cool.” 
“So… like, I haven’t kissed a bloke before, but I’ve kissed girls.” Sirius smiled, “Have you kissed a bloke before? I know you’ve kissed a couple girls.” 
Remus nods, “I kissed Peter once.” 
Sirius immediately does not like that. He doesn’t know why, but that’s just weird. It’s just so, so weird. Peter? Remus has kissed Peter? What the fuck. 
“What?”
“Yeah, we made out once-“ Remus cuts himself off, giving Sirius an unsure look. 
Sirius knows it’s because he’s scowling. He’s not even ashamed of it. Remus and Peter made out, how fucking weird. That’s just fucking weird. That’s so gross, that so- oh, is Sirius homophobic? Oh, Sirius really doesn’t want to be homophobic. A lot of his friends are gay, that would be really bad if he was homophobic. 
He huffs and looks at the ground, “Did it mean anything-“
“No.” Remus says immediately, “The girls just dared us one day, since they’ve all kissed each other- it was just stupid. Didn’t mean anything. Never will. Never has.” 
“Oh, cool.” Sirius nods, some of the weight lifting off of his shoulders. The thought still makes him a little queasy, but less so now.
Perhaps shagging a bloke will make him less homophobic. He really hopes it will. He feels really terrible. His whole life he’s been running from the man his parents tried to shape him into, and yet, the shadow lingers. 
It’s terrifying. 
“Erm, so… do we just… kiss?” 
Remus is still for a moment, and he’s looking at Sirius kind of strangely. Sirius doesn’t know what to do with himself in all honesty, he never does under Remus’ gaze. It’s always so intense, it makes him nervous, fiddley… giggly. 
Oh yeah, Remus makes him so giggly. He’s fighting the urge to giggle like a child now. Remus is just… he’s looking at him, like really looking. Sirius feels so special when Remus looks at him, because he knows Remus doesn’t look at anyone else like this. No, this look is reserved especially for Sirius and that’s just… well, isn’t that just delightful? 
But he really doesn’t want to giggle right now. He’s trying so hard not too, because that would be embarrassing. He feels like a girl, which is so weird, and so dumb, because why would he ever feel like that? 
“Do you want to kiss?” Remus asked back eventually. 
“Yes.” Sirius says, without a thought, mouth on autopilot apparently. And that’s probably a good thing, because his brain is kind of a bit useless at the moment. So much is going on up there, yet there are no thoughts at all. He nods his head for assurance, “Yeah, that’d be good.”
“Okay.” Remus smiled and took a couple of steps closer. 
Sirius looked at the gap between them, there wasn’t much of one, but he certainly wasn’t close enough to comfortably kiss. So Sirius took the final step, the baggy wool of Remus’ sweater brushing up against the buttons of Sirius’ shirt. 
“Hi there.” Sirius murmured into the small space between them. If he leant forward, just a smidgen, their noses would bump together. 
“Hi.” Remus smiles, his cheeks flushing a really adorable pink colour, flushed under freckles and scars. 
Sirius really doesn’t know how Remus doesn’t get girls, because he thinks Remus is quite attractive. Well, sure, he’s not dashing in the way Sirius effortlessly is, and he’s not cute in the way Peter is, and he’s certainly not stoically handsome like James. But he’s attractive in his own little way, in the Remus way, the way that he’s just really handsome because he simply is and everyone should just agree because Sirius knows. 
Besides, he looks really cute when he’s about to get kissed. All up close and personal, honey-golden eyes barely visible behind the dilation in his pupils, flushed cheeks smattered under a galaxy of freckles, silver scars that are just so intrinsically Remus, pert lips that look so… so… uhm, Sirius can’t think. He’s too distracted to think. 
Point is, Remus is damned attractive and it’s appalling that not more people think so. 
Remus huffs and bites his lip, and Sirius can feel his eyes searching all over Sirius’ face. But he can’t help but stare at the place between Remus’ front teeth, the plush skin, it’s so pink and shiny. He’s just so… so cute. 
Sirius boops their noses together. 
Remus almost giggles. 
Sirius kisses him. 
It’s… well, it’s so much better than kissing girls. Honestly, Remus must have been practising because he’s just really good at this whole kissing thing. Maybe there’s a spell or something that makes you really good. 
Whatever it is, Remus is it. They’re not even making out and it’s just so much better than every girl he’s ever kissed, ever. 
Remus is really just such a good mate, isn’t he? Gosh, Sirius really thinks so. 
Remus shuffles a little closer and tips his head to the side slightly, opening his mouth and sliding his tongue along the seam of Sirius’ own lips. 
It’s so well done, his smoothness, that Sirius breaks out in goosebumps. Once this is all over, Sirius will have to tell Remus that he really is just so good at all this kissing stuff. 
He’s really that good that Sirius kinda just wants to keep him to himself. Like a little trophy that only he gets to have. No one else should be allowed to be graced with such good kissing skills because honestly, Sirius doesn’t think any girl out there would be able to properly appreciate it. 
It’s so good, when Remus slips some tongue into Sirius’ mouth and reaches up to tug Sirius in by the belt loops, that he moans. He actually moaned, and he’s not even embarrassed because Remus needs to know just how good at this he is. 
Remus tugs him closer and Sirius lifts his hands to grab at the back of Remus’ neck and tug at the jumper over his shoulder because something has just come over him. Something wild. Some primal need or something to just tear Remus’ clothes off and have him. He blames Padfoot. 
They shuffle back to Sirius’ bed until Remus’ knees buckle and he flops down onto it. Sirius shoves himself into Remus’ lap, straddling him and pressing close which just feels… so good. Like, Remus really doesn’t know how good he is. 
He must be some sex god or something. How Remus hasn’t had sex yet, Sirius doesn’t know. But what he does know, is that Remus is so fucking wonderful and Sirius doesn’t want to share. 
How strange is that? 
Remus’ bony fingers reach up to undo the buttons on Sirius’ shirt, but before he can even get halfway, Sirius is yanking Remus’ jumper up and off his body in a rush. 
“So good.” He mutters, leaning in to kiss Remus again. He starts shoving off his own shirt before Remus can do the last button. “Oh, you’re really good at this, Moony.” 
Remus moans against his mouth and wow, holy Godrick, that’s really a wonderful sound. How are his moans even that brilliant? This really isn’t fair. How is Sirius ever supposed to be so good in bed? He really hopes he doesn’t let Remus down. 
“Fuck.” Remus mumbles, latching his lip onto Sirius’ throat and groaning when Sirius digs his nails into Remus’ shoulders, “You- oh, you’re really- you’re so hot.”
Sirius flushes all over, and he dips back down to kiss Remus again. He can’t help but giggle. 
☆ ★ ☆
“Please, please, please, please.” Sirius is mumbling, actually completely naked underneath Remus which is just… it’s really a sight to behold. It’s an image which will be imprinted in Remus’ mind for the rest of eternity. 
Remus can’t help but duck down to kiss him, right on the lips, because Sirius seems to actually really love that. He actually seems to really love a lot of things involving Remus sexually. 
Remus moans, his hips pressing down against Sirius’. The friction from that alone is far better than anything he conjures up in his mind and creates with his own right hand at night. 
“Yeah.” He nods, “Yeah, erm… do… do you wanna do it yourself?”
“Do what?” Sirius gasps, bucking his hips up when Remus doesn’t grind down again. 
“Finger yourself.” Remus says bluntly, because there’s really no other way to say it. 
“Oh, uhm…” Sirius’ eyes fly open, and they flick around Remus’ face for a bit before he flushes more than he already has and smiles, “Can you do it? I don’t really know what I’m doing, and I’ll just probably like it more if you did… you’re like… really bloody good at this sex stuff.” 
Remus knows for a fact that he is not really bloody good at this sex stuff. He’s never even done it before, and he’s being really awkward as he always is. The first kiss they shared he was so stiff for, and he literally opened his mouth and shoved his tongue out really weirdly because he was just so shocked by Sirius actually doing this. He knows that was a terrible kiss, but Sirius just kept kissing him anyway. And then Sirius kinda took the lead there a little and gave Remus some time to figure it out, thankfully. 
So yeah, Remus knows he’s so fucking bad at this. He knows Sirius has been with a good handful of girls who are confident, and experienced, and way nicer to look at. And yet, Sirius won’t stop banging on about how fucking good Remus is at all of this, how his mouth is fucking magic, and how he’s making Sirius all tingly. 
It’s like a dream. A real dream brought to life or something. Remus really pinched himself at one moment to make sure he wasn’t actually dreaming it up. 
But no. It’s real. And Sirius’ is enjoying it. And Sirius wants Remus to finger him. And Sirius wants to have sex with Remus. 
Remus is almost certain that Sirius just… isn’t actually into girls at this point. Or at the very least, is into guys in one way or another. 
Remus grabs the lube from under Sirius’ back, where he’d landed on it a while ago when taking off his trousers. He pops the cap and squeezes a big glob of lube onto his fingers before spreading it around a little. 
Sirius gazes up at him, his legs are slightly open, spread around Remus’ own knees, all just… naked for him. His gaze is heavy lidded, and Remus fights the urge to look further downward. 
“Just be nice, yeah?” Sirius asks, a finger reaching out to draw over a scar on Remus’ middle. “I haven’t been fingered or anything before, so… do you think it will hurt?” 
Remus shakes his head, “Ah… I did it to myself once. If you go slow it doesn’t… I’ll go slow.” 
“Okay.” Sirius blushes again, “You really are the best, Moonshine.” 
Merlin, that name? Oh, Remus is starting to lose it. He’s actually going to lose his mind about it. It’s bad enough as is, when Sirius calls him that just out and about. It makes his heart race and his stomach fill with butterflies. 
But here? Now? Well, Remus is going to implode. He’s so, so fucking into Sirius it’s sickening. 
“Thanks.” Remus mutters, reaching a sticky finger down between Sirius’ legs, “Erm, is that… are you…. Can I?”
“Yeah.” Sirius breathes, his eyes falling shut, “O-oh, fuck, yeah. Oh, Moony, you’re so… mhm, you’re so good at this.” 
Remus’ brain melts a little more, because he hasn’t actually done anything. Really, his finger is just sitting there, only the very tip of it has pushed inside and Sirius is there acting like Remus is just about to make him cum. 
Sirius really can’t be straight. He’s either really good at faking it, or really, really gay. 
Remus hopes for the latter. 
“What about that? Hurt?”
“No.” Sirius hums, smiling to himself as he turns his head into the pillows, his hands gripping the sheets, “No, s’good. Oh, Moonbeam, you’re- oh, you’d never… never hurt me. Never hurt me, baby. S’good.”
Remus has suddenly lost all coherent thought. 
☆ ★ ☆
Sirius feels euphoric. 
Really, he wishes he had sex with Remus earlier because this is just fucking brilliant. Remus is really just so good. 
When Sirius has sex with girls, he feels kinda good physically a lot. Like, his cock likes it, he supposed. But it’s usually really boring. It’s just not all that great, he doesn’t get why James likes sex so much. 
But like, with Moony? Well, everything is great. He’s just really good at it, and he must know exactly what he’s doing because no matter what it just makes Sirius feel so amazing. 
Physically and emotionally. Like, everywhere. He feels like a live wire. 
“R-Remus.” He stutters out, because he’s not very good at talking anymore. He’s mostly just loudly moaning and stuff. Like, it’s so loud that Remus actually stopped midway through to cast a silencing charm so people outside the dorm wouldn’t hear. “Oh, fuck, Remus. Please, can you just fuck me?”
“Shit.” Remus moans, “F-fuck, yeah. You… you sure? You sure you want that?” 
Sirius nods, because if Remus fingering him is this good, then he really wants to find out about the rest of it. 
“Yeah, please.” Sirius said, “Really, really, please, Moonybaby. Oh, fuck- you’re so- you’re so good at- uh.” 
“Fucking- okay, yeah.” Remus chokes out, pulling his hand away from Sirius.  
He can’t help but whine about it, feeling so cold and empty. He reaches out to cling to Remus, but all he gets are glorious, sweaty, scarred thighs. 
He lifts his head when he hears a wet sound, and watches Remus smear some lube over himself, quite entranced by it. He watches the slick glide of Remus’ wonderful hands and wishes it was himself between those magical fingers. 
Remus comes closer, and Sirius immediately grabs for him. His arms sling around Remus’ neck, fingers sifting in through hair and clawing at his back. 
“Oh, Moony.” Sirius moans, kissing him as much as Remus will let him, “Please. Oh, you’re so… oh, R-Remus.”
“Bloody hell, Sirius.” Remus grunts, pressing in as close as he can. His whole body shivers as he slowly sinks down, Sirius whining helplessly in his ear. He can’t help it, it feels so fucking good, just like he thought. “Oh, fuck, you’re so- so hot. So fucking… oh, fuck.”
Sirius can’t stop kissing, everywhere. Anywhere his lips can reach he’s attaching himself to Remus. It really is quite delightful, getting fucked by his sex god best friend. 
He thinks about recommending it to James, but thankfully James is a committed man. Then perhaps Peter, but- no, they’ve already kissed, they’ve done enough. Besides, Sirius is apparently homophobic about that so he probably shouldn’t suggest it. 
Maybe he’ll just tell everyone Remus is really bad, so no one else goes and fucks him- yeah, that sounds good. No one else gets to have him, only Sirius. 
He’s probably a really bad friend for that, but, well, he doesn’t really care right now because Remus is just making him feel so, so good. Like, really lucky. 
☆ ★ ☆
Sirius is clinging to Remus like he’s his life line. It’s probably the best feeling in the world. And yes, that includes the feeling of been balls deep inside Sirius. 
Both are fucking amazing, but being clung too by Sirius beats it by just a smidgen. 
He’s shaking, actually, so much to the point that Remus had thought he’d done something wrong. But no, Sirius has assured him it’s purely because he just feels fucking amazing. That Remus is doing a bang on job. 
Really, Remus isn’t sure why Sirius keeps saying such things. Like, sure, now it’s fine because Remus has found a rhythm and gotten more comfortable doing this, but he was so awkward those first few thrusts. They were miscalculated, and kinda desperate, and just not very good, he could tell. But still, Sirius had said it’s the best feeling ever. 
Remus doesn’t know what to do with himself. So he just lets his body do whatever the hell it needs. And what it needs is to make Sirius finish, and apparently, to say dumb shit he’s going to regret later. 
“You’re so… so fucking pretty, baby.” He mutters, kissing Sirius between each few words, “So good, so gorgeous. Feels so good- so good. Oh you’re just so good, so-“
Remus reels back, because Sirius is thrashing almost violently, and is getting louder and- Remus looks down to find white smeared all over Sirius’ stomach. 
Sirius doesn’t give Remus time to process that before he’s pulling him down into a deep kiss and thrusting his own hips up to meet Remus’. 
“Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.” Sirius is muttering on repeat, smattering kisses everywhere on Remus’ face as he chases his own. “Oh, so- so good, Moonshine. You’re so good, too good to me.” 
Remus presses their foreheads together as he cums and kisses Sirius midway through. When he pulls away, Sirius is dazed. 
He has a faraway, dreamy look in his eyes and a relaxed smile on his lips. His cheeks are bright pink, a stark contrast to his pale complexion, and his skin shimmers with sweat. 
Oh, he really is just so fucking pretty. 
“Fuck.” Remus grunts, shifting until he’s laying down beside Sirius, both on their backs, shoulders overlapped. 
Sirius whines as Remus slips away, and shivers slightly. Remus grabs his jumper off the pillow and lays it over Sirius’ chest like a blanket. 
“Hmm.” He hums, and closes his eyes. 
Remus cleans them both up, reaching the end of the box of tissues on Sirius’ bedside. But they’re clean, so it’s fine. 
They lie there in silence for a while. Remus feels the moment Sirius comes too again, stiffening beside him. It’s awkward, tense. Slowly, Sirius shucks Remus’ jumper off his chest and they both lie there, completely naked, staring at the roof. 
They hear James and Peter come into the room, “Told you.” 
“Don’t believe you.” James muttered back, “Pads, mate, you in here?”
“James, they’re probably having a meaningful conversation.” Peter huffs, “Look at the curtains.” 
“Well, I want to see him.”
“You can later.” Peter offers, “Sirius, if you want James to come in, say something back.”
“Don’t come in!” Sirius shouts, and silence lingers outside. 
“See, he doesn’t want you too.” Peter says after a while, “Completely silent.” 
“The charm must still be on.” Remus muttered. 
“Oh.” Sirius nodded. 
“Fine.” James groaned, “Come to my bed later, Sirius. I’m going to sleep.”
Sirius and Remus lie there for a while, listening to James and Peter get ready for bed. Honestly, Remus is glad Peter didn’t say anything to James about them having sex. 
Or, well, he doesn’t think he said anything. 
Not that he’d be mad if James found out Remus is gay. He’s pretty sure James already knows. But, he’s sure Sirius would want to tell him about that. Sirius would probably have some strange things to say about it, so, it’s best if Sirius is the one to lay it all out there. 
Once the room goes silent again, and the lights are all turned out, they dare a glance over at each other. Just as quickly, they look away. 
Remus starts to feel a little guilty. He knows how he feels about Sirius, and Sirius clearly hadn’t felt the same way. At least not prior to now. So, he decides to bite the fucking bullet, despite his own judgments, and confessess. 
“I liked that.” 
“Yeah, me too.” Sirius nodded, eyes fixed on the roof, “Felt good. You made me cum really hard.”
Merlin, he really doesn’t make anything easy for Remus, does he? 
“Yeah.” Remus nods, “But like… I liked it in a gay way.”
Sirius tenses beside him again. 
“Erm, cause I’m gay.” Remus fills in, refusing to look anywhere but the stupid poster of a half naked motorbike girl on Sirius’ ceiling. “And I like you.”
“You… like me?” Sirius mumbles. 
“Yeah.” Remus breathes, “A lot… I think you’re… brilliant. You’re really, really, fucking brilliant. And also really good at sex.”
Sirius swallowed, “So, do you think I’m pretty?”
“Yeah.” Remus nodded, “I said it, before.” 
“I thought you might have just been doing sex talk.” 
“Oh…” Remus swallows, “Were you just doing sex talk?”
“No.” Sirius shakes his head, “I just… no, it was all honest. But, girls often make up sex talk, so-“
“I’m not a girl.” 
“Yeah, I know.” Sirius swallowed, “So you… you fancy me, for real?”
“Yeah.” Remus nods, “A lot.”
“Oh.” 
Remus chewed on his lip. 
“Excuse me.” Sirius muttered, and then climbed out of bed. 
He didn’t even stop to put trousers on or anything. Remus listened as he walked over and pulled back the curtains of James’ bed. 
“Oh, Sirius, hey, I- Merlin! Where are your clothes?”
“Over there. Remus and I had sex.” 
There was silence for a while before James said back, “What?”
“Remus and I had sex.” 
“When?” James asked, fucking gobsmacked. 
“Just then.” Sirius said, “Before you came into the room.” 
“Wh- why?”
“It was your idea!” He said defensively, “You said I should just fuck Remus, so I did. I fucked Remus- or, rather, he fucked me.” 
“And you just decided to come tell me this, still very naked?”
“Yeah.” Sirius said, “I think I can still feel his cum inside-“
“Bloody hell, Sirius. You know he can- just, get in.”
“Do you want me to put clothes on?” 
“Merlin, I don’t care, just…”
“He’s gay, you know?” Remus heard Sirius shuffle into the bed, “Said he likes me.” 
“Wow, really?” James gasped, “I had no fucking idea. It’s not like he stares at you longingly or anything.” 
“Oh…” Sirius mumbled, “I think I’m homophobic, by the way.” 
“Sorry?”
“Yeah, he said he kissed Pete and that made me feel kind of nauseous.” 
There was another long stretch of silence, and then from his own bed, Peter muttered, “You owe me twenty gallons, James.” 
“Fuck.” James muttered, drawing the curtains around them, “Look, Sirius, you’re not homophobic.”
“Erm, yes I am.” Sirius said in defence, “Why else would I get mad about Remus getting involved with other blokes?”
“Oh, Sirius.” James sighed, and cast a silencing charm around them. 
☆ ★ ☆
Remus is startled awake by the curtains swishing back. Not that he slept very deeply, just a little nap. He’s still in Sirius’ bed. He was too anxious to move. 
Now that he sees Sirius standing there, still very naked, he feels like he should have left. 
Sirius lifts up the corner of his blanket and slides under, closing the curtain around them before casting another silencing charm. 
He tugs at the sheet and gestures for Remus to get under. And then they both lie there again, shoulder to shoulder, staring at the roof. 
“You okay?” Remus asks after a long silence. He feels so awkward about it. 
“Yep.” Sirius nods, “Just… trying to figure out the least scary way to ask you to be my boyfriend.”
Remus’ heart falls out from under him, “What?”
“Oh.” Sirius mutters, “I guess I just did, didn’t I?”
“Are you serious?” Remus gasps, turning to look at him. 
Sirius smirks and turns his head slowly to look back at Remus. 
“Don’t answer that.” He mutters, “I’m…”
“Yeah.” Sirius nods, genuinity behind his pretty, pale eyes, “Erm, yeah, James told me I’m gay.”
“What?” Remus gaped, “What do you mean he told you you were gay?”
Sirius shrugged, “Like, I’ve been gay this whole time, and I really like you. I just didn’t know it, is all. I thought I was homophobic, can you believe that? James just made me realise I was jealous.”
“Jealous… of Peter?” 
“Yes. Never look at him again, please.” Sirius said sternly. 
Remus furrowed his brow, looking at Sirius in shock. 
Sirius broke into a grin, “I’m kidding. But really, I did get jealous. I’m jealous about you a lot. It’s why I get so angry at you sometimes.”
“Oh.” Remus swallowed, “That…”
“Yeah.” Sirius smiled, laughing at himself softly, “It’s stupid. I’m stupid.”
“You’re not.” Remus corrects, “You’re really smart. You’re the smartest person I know. Sometimes this stuff is just really hard, I get it. I know.” 
He blushes, and it’s fucking adorable. It’s always adorable. 
“You’re so sweet, Moony.” Sirius hums, kissing Remus’ shoulder, “So, will you?”
“Will I what?”
“Be mine?” He asks. 
“Oh…” Remus’ heart is racing. It’s going so fast, beating so hard he can feel it in his throat, “Yes. Fuck, yes please.” 
Sirius breaks out into the most brilliant smile before rolling over and wrapping himself around Remus, “Yay.” 
Remus hugs him back, entangling their legs together and hoping they never have to untangle, “You really mean it?”
“Yeah.” Sirius hums, pressing his lips to Remus’ skin a few times, “Oh, I was so crazy for not knowing it, Moonshine. I’m mental about you.” 
Remus feels extatic, “I’m mental about you too, sweetheart.” 
“Oh, I really like that.” Sirius mused, “I really like you.”
Remus chuckled, “Okay, sweetheart.” 
Sirius hums, content, snuggling closer into Remus’ side, “God, imagine my mother now. Not just shagging an unregistered werewolf bloke, but now he’s my boyfriend?”
“She’d have a heart attack.” 
“Good.” Sirius smiled, “Oh, I love when everything just comes together like this. James is so exited. He owes Pete a lot of money, they’ve been betting on us for ages.” 
Remus snorts, “I think Pete’s been cheating then. He’s known I’m into you for ages.”
Sirius snorts, “Of course he is.” He lifts his head to kiss Remus sweetly, “Let me take you out on a date, Moonybaby?”
Remus melted, sighing against Sirius’ lips, “Yeah, please.” 
“Oh, I’m gonna woo you so hard, you won’t even know what hit you.” Sirius smiled, “And then we’re gonna shag so much again, because I didn’t know shagging was actually fun.”
Remus snorts and kissed Sirius some more, “I did, I was just waiting for you to prove it.” 
The way that Sirius swooned made Remus feel like he was on top of the fucking world. 
⋅⋆ ☼ ☆ ☾ ☆ ☼ ⋆⋅
HAPPY HORNY SATURDAY! i hope you enjoyed this one, it was very fun to write. just a silly little bit of smut because why the hell not, i say?!
don't forget to reblog and commentary is ALWAYS welcome here. thankies!
Since you guys were interested I’m just tagging you here :)) hope you enjoyed!! <3 @stranger200-blog @addsalwayssick
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ccrisntok · 2 months ago
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whace but.... vampire... monster hunter...
im sick and feel like garbage please take the gay people
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there isnt rlly a story here. ace is a monster hunter and is good at it bc he goes fucking crazy when hes scared. whit is a vampire who was born one bc his mom was one (im sure thats not how it works but who cares). he eats ethically sourced animal blood bc hes a liberal. ace and levi work together. ace and whit fall in love somehow i dunno
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tossawary · 3 months ago
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I'm only on Episode 5 of "Teen Wolf" and it's hard not to think about Stiles/Derek due to the pairing's influence as a fandom juggernaut throughout the 2010s. It has, over the years, occasionally made me intensely curious as to what was actually in the source material to spark this, versus how much of it was the migratory slash fanfiction fandom stuff.
I don't have... super strong opinions of them from the source material yet? I don't really think they have positive or negative chemistry at the moment. Their interactions are hampered by the fact that I think Derek Hale is currently kind of incoherent as a character, apparently not allowed to actually talk to anyone due to contrived drama reasons, preventing him from connecting naturally on an informational or emotional level to Stiles or Scott. Derek's backstory is still murky and largely unknown. Derek's personal goals here are also a little unclear. Some of this will be cleared up as the season goes on.
I do think that I personally would enjoy Derek more if he had actually been only a few years older than Scott and Stiles, as Stiles says in the first episode, and actually looked it as well. I think that Derek being younger, being another "teen wolf" at 19, would have 1) put him on more even footing with Scott, and 2) made him come across as more of a scared, cornered animal, lashing out at the Argents and stumbling around lost without his family/pack. Like, the traumatized lone wolf thing is apparently what's happening with Derek anyway, but I do think all that would be better communicated to the audience if Derek looked younger and more pathetic and was allowed to snap at / talk to people more and with purpose.
If Derek was younger, I also think that he would function as a better mirror / foil to Scott. Here's this kid who was born a werewolf (unlike Scott), had a big and loving family (Scott has a single, loving mother and an apparently better-absent father), and is now orphaned and homeless and friendless (unlike Scott). It would also make Kate look even more vile and I'm good with that. I know the writers are going to absolutely miss the opportunity to have Scott and Derek's relationship have some more positive give-and-take. Scott has a lot to offer Derek! Scott's kind heart is one of my favorite things about him so far!
Anyway, back to the Stiles/Derek stuff. Yeah, I would also like Stiles/Derek or Scott/Derek more as concepts if Derek was younger. Right now, from the actual canon material I've seen, disregarding the knowledge I've picked up over the years regarding Derek's life, Derek is mostly giving me Angel from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" vibes. And I really did not like Angel and especially not Angel/Buffy.
One positive thing I will say for Stiles/Derek is that I can absolutely see where the ship originally came from. Stiles does have some very queerbait-y lines with the "am I attractive to gay guys" humor. Derek is conventionally attractive. Derek and Stiles are the only two people in on the "Scott is a werewolf" problem, helping him out, and there's maybe a dash of "pair the spares" to it, but these two people are actually interacting and cooperating to solve problems together. And "I got you arrested for a murder you didn't commit" / "you need to cut off my arm" is a hell of a starting point for a ship. That's honestly great stuff. That's a level of freak that might generally inspire me to invent chemistry for a pair of characters, just to figure out how to make that relationship work.
In conclusion, I don't personally ship it, but I get it. I totally see where it came from.
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wolfstarlibrarian · 4 months ago
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9 books to read in 2025 (sweet + spicy)
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Thank you SO much to @eyra for tagging me! I love an excuse to talk about books.
I had SO much fun reading these books I'm excited to share them, so pretty please let me know if you read any of them? I might put anon asks back on because I'm so eager to discuss them. Also, all of these books have HEAs.
Also, I'm working on related marauders lists for almost all of these, so stay tuned!
🌶️ = the more peppers the spicier it is
🍭 = the more lollipops the sweeter it is
Captive Prince: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
This series is one that ifykyk. It's a dark, dramatic, sexy mlm series set in a pseudo historic age and WOW. If it was a fic it'd come with tons of warnings and tags, but there's also an underlying softness between the main characters. Lots of angst and drama and characters you can't help root for. DEFINITELY an 18+ rec so please proceed accordingly.
Johann: Vampire Mates: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ 🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭
I already rec'd one of the books in this series here, but this one is tied for my favorite. A modern soulmate/vampire au that's got humor, the CUTEST cinnamon roll who's inexperienced (and hundreds of years old), a russian mobster, and just enough angst to make me you ache.
Boystown Heartbreakers: 🌶️🌶️ ����🍭🍭
If you're a wolfstar fan, then you'll absolutely adore this friends-to-lovers modern story about a hairstylist who is so worried about dating his DROP DEAD GORGEOUS best friend. All the internal turmoil paired with a book boyfriend you'll absolutely love, and lines that actually had me laughing out loud makes this one of my top reads for the year.
The Charm Offensive: 🌶️🌶️ 🍭🍭🍭
This one totally surprised me with how well it dealth with mental health issues in the middle of a VERY charming story about falling in love with someone (when it's literally your job to help them fall in love with someone else). A bi-awakening and oblivious pining gem. If you want more fics that feature a reality show check out this rec list.
Myles Below Freezing: 🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭
Okay can someone alert the Hazelnoot server? Because this one feels like a cross between Solntse and Sweater Weather. Myles (a cinnamon roll, nerdy Remus IMO) has to solve a murder mystery at the South Pole while trying not to fall for the sweetheart Russian Alexei. The banter is incredible and honestly my friends and I need a second book about the lesbians in it. Forced proximity, oblivious DATING, anxiety rep, action and chase scenes, cuddling, and locked-in together all in one.
Sapphire Sunset: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ 🍭🍭🍭
If you don't know Chris Rice, he's the gay son of Anne Rice (author of Interview With A Vampire) and thank god he's followed in her footsteps because his romance books are SO good and intense and yet fluffy? It's a ton of drama about an ex-marine and a hotel heir and a family scandal for the books. Feels delightfully like an age-gap modern Drarry book.
Lightning Born: 🌶️ 🍭
A friend recommended me this Frankenstein mlm retelling, and I was like "ew, no". However, I was completely surprised by how much heart it had, and how much it reminded me of R/S. Amnesia (due to ya know, dying), forbidden love, some serious angst, and thankfully a HEA that includes lesbians getting to live out in the tropics.
Honey Girl: 🌶️🌶️ 🍭🍭🍭
This is the only book on the list with wlw as the main pairing and by god, it's beautiful. The writing style gripped me on the first page and I've been recommending it to everyone since I've read it. Imagine waking up in a hotel room in Vegas, by yourself, with a wedding band on your finger and a note. The whole book feels like an intimate love letter and it should absolutely be on your TBR.
On Writing
No spice or sweetness in this non-fiction book, because it's a book by Stephen King on writing. Whenever I talk to anyone who's struggling with their craft I always recommend this book. It's short, to the point, and will leave you feeling much more confident in your abilities while helping you improve your writing. 10/10.
Okay well I hope you enjoy these recs! I've turned on anon asks so please share your thoughts or your own recs as I'm always looking for new books and fics to read. (We'll just ignore how long the TBR list is already...)
Tagging: @thedrarrylibrarian @wolfstarwarehouse @wolfstarmicrofic @pancakehouse @imsiriuslyreading @lavenderhaze @rainbowrowell @gayliketheancients @brandileigh2003 @mrtellmeafckingsecret @imjusthereforwolfstar And ANYONE ELSE who also love books
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bumbl3beetle · 4 months ago
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HI, I'M HERE TO INTRODUCE MY BAND DR!!!
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Band name - Mixed SuitCase (MSC)
We are a multi genre band who started out making music in our guitarists closet.
We all met in band class, and we started the band due to boredom, and due to me and the guitarist (Milo) constantly fighting. We hated each other, and the band forced us to get along.
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Introducing.. THE MEMBERS !!!
Me !
nickname(s): Luci, girl guy, Lucio
band role: lead singer
age: 16
birthday: 04/01
pronouns: he/him
Sexuality: bisexual
Face claim / look alike claim:
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
Marla !
nickname(s): Marls, Marla
band role: drums
age: 16
birthday: 03/26
pronouns: She/they
sexuality: Pansexual
relationship: close friends!
closeness: 9/10
extra (traits, hobbies, tendencies): LOOVES peanut butter. She's allergic to grapes. Her favorite animal is a bearded dragon. Her favorite color is blue. She's very touchy. People often talk over her, and prefers one on one. She has ADHD. She hates coffee, but doesn't mind the flavor. She loves writing lyrics. Her voice claim is "Agnes" from "Fantastic Mr. Fox".
face claim / look alike claim:
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
Ruth !
nickname(s): Ruth bear, Ruth berries, Ruth
band role: back up vocals, bassist
age: 16
birthday: 08/18
pronouns: She/her
sexuality: Bisexual
relationship: BESTIES
closeness: 9/10
extra (traits, hobbies, tendencies): Favorite food is cherries. She hates bananas and chocolate. She loves rap but specifically 90s rap. She’s been known to leave her things around, having completely forgotten about them. She has ADHD. Her voice claim is "Young Vi" from "Arcane".
Face claim / look alike claim:
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧���。˚ ⋆
Milo !
nickname(s): Milo, Mr handsome
band role: guitar
age: 15
birthday: 01/02
pronouns: He/him
sexuality: Bicurious
relationship: Erm close friends? we hated each other
closeness: 10/10
extra (traits, hobbies, tendencies): loves metal (the material). Believes in manifesting. Got his ears pierced when he was born. Learned guitar to “bring in the ladies”. He’s Filipino and Korean. Loves physical touch, his hands are rough. His mother used to go to gay bars just to see pretty outfits. His voice claim is "Rob" from "The Amazing World of Gumball".
Face claim / look alike claim:
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
We only have two albums currently, "Dear PenPal" and "UnORIGINAL".
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The album contents and the artists who made the songs in this reality! ↓
Dear PenPal
Fade into you - Mazzy Star
No other heart - Mac DeMarco
Again & Again - The Bird And The Bee
Iris - Goo Goo Dolls
For the First Time - Mac DeMarco
BIRDS OF A FEATHER - Billie Eilish
Once More to See You - Mitski
.・。.・゜✭・
UnORIGINAL
Clay Pigeons - Michael Cera
Velvet Ring - Big Thief
Linger - The Cranberries
I Just Threw Out The Love Of My Dreams - Weezer
Vampire Empire - Big Thief
Chokehold - Sleep Token
.・。.・゜✭・
I'm currently working on our third album, which will be completely metal! I do eventually want to make an album that is country, and one that is Gothic. Can you see why I chose Mixed SuitCase?
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Anyways, thanks for reading! If there's anything you want to know / want me to add to this, lmk!
Have a wonderful day and go shift!! ˙˚ʚ(´◡`)ɞ˚˙
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cosmorandom · 4 months ago
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If we go by the theory that Rin (and possibly by extension, Eiden) is a creation of Huey— as in they're magical babies without a biological mother (unless Huey birthed them out himself ig)— then would it be farfetched to say that Aster and Morvay could possibly be "tests" before Huey created Rin/Eiden?
I'd say some of his grievances regarding Aster's behavior is the result of Aster being Huey's very first complete essence-created-lifeform. I'd imagine Huey picked up a book that detailed the biology and anatomies of different mythical creatures and used that as a reference for the familiars to try and familiarize himself with the process of creating life out of essence. With Aster, he clearly succeeded, but perhaps expected Aster only needing essence to be fed and not blood despite the fact that he created a vampire. Maybe his logic was that; even if he creates a vampire, that vampire may not necessarily need blood specifically to be fed, only essence because of that fact that this particular vampire was born through essence and not born through a womb (or however normal vampires are born). WHile Huey was correct to a degree— Aster himself has stated that he's relatively okay with feeding through guzzling cum like Morvay, he just prefers blood— he probably expected Aster to be less "savage".
Anyway, Aster successfully being created probably gave Huey the confirmation that yes creating life out of essence is possible.
Then comes Morvay. Huey likely didn't think he'd need to create life again, but he did! Maybe he used this opportunity to further improve on his.. Life creating skills or smth.. And as of right now, Heuy doesn't seem to have any particularly negative opinions on Morvay or how Morvay feeds (probably because Huey was expecting it, considering what Incubi are) so maybe, Huey thought that he had done a better job this time.
ALL OF THIS IS TO SAY Aster and Morvay may have been "trial runs" or "tests" Huey created before attempting to make Rin. After all, Aster and Morvay are based off of mythical creatures and therefore have a "reference" that Huey could go off of. And after creating the familiars, Huey mustered enough confidence to create Eiden/Rin
But that's just a theory!! A GAY THEORY!!! Soooooo take ALL of this with industrial sized bags of salt
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rallamajoop · 8 months ago
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Queer lit of the 1800s: Two gay Victorian vampire stories you've probably never heard of
So, I have this post in the works tackling that all-important question: just why are there so many gay vampire stories? But in writing it, what was supposed to be a brief tangent about a couple of little-known m/m vampire stories from all the way back in the late 1800s era… started expanding into something not-so-brief, as such tangents are prone to do.
But what the hell, the internet tells me it's queer history month: clearly the only solution is to give those stories their own post, where my tangent can spin out as far as it likes!
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Now, if you know anything about Victorian vampire literature or the lesbian vampire genre, you’ve probably already heard about Carmilla, by Sheridan le Fanu (1872), the world’s very first (known) lesbian vampire story. To this day, it's easily the second best-known and widely adapted tale in all the Victorian vampire canon (after Dracula, obviously) – and it probably deserves to be too.
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But this is not a post about Carmilla, because Carmilla is not the only gay-vampire-story written way back in the Victorian era. It's not even the least subtle gay-vampire-tale.
There are (at least) two others, both featuring male/male vampire/human pairings. And whether or not they ‘deserve’ to be remembered in the same breath as Carmilla, they’re both fascinating works in their own rights: Manor, by Karl Heinrich Ulrichs (1884) – one of the world’s first gay activists – and A True Story of a Vampire, by Count Eric Stenbock (1894).
You can read both online. A True Story of a Vampire is long out of copyright and can be found on Gutenberg (Carmilla is too, if you're interested), and many other places. Manor has been translated into English only much more recently, but you can still get hold of it in pdf form, or buy it in ebook format. But if what you really want are some summaries, and/or whole lot of extra context and analysis to go with the stories themselves, I've got you covered below.
Manor (1884), Sailor Stories, and Karl Heinrich Ulrichs
We’ll start with Manor, since it was published ten years before our other example, and because I’m not quite cruel enough to leave you going "wait, did you really just tell me there was a legit gay activist writing vampire slashfic in his free time way back in the 1880s?" while I ramble on about the other story first. We'll start with the author himself, because his own story is at least as interesting as any fiction he ever published.
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Born in Germany in 1825, Karl Heinrich Ulrichs knew from a young age that he was attracted to men. He trained in law, but wisely resigned before he could be fired in 1854 when his proclivities came to the attention of his superiors. Most in his position would've redoubled their efforts to hide; Ulrichs spent the next several years joining societies dedicated to science and literature and developing his own theories about non-hetero orientations, before officially coming out to his family in 1862.
He was just getting started. By 1867, he was ready to come out to the whole world.
Ulrichs is far from the first gay man to recognise his attraction without shame and find society in like-minded individuals ‒ but he may well be the very first to come out voluntarily and publicly, and advocate for the decriminalisation of homosexuality. And when I say "publicly" what I mean of course is, "in a formal address to the Congress of German Jurists." He was shouted down, but it was still a staggering act of bravery for a man of his time. It would still be a staggering act of bravery in many parts of the world today.
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Undaunted by his reception, Ulrichs would also publish a dozen booklets advocating for rights for his community between 1864 and 1879, framing their sexuality as natural, inborn and wholly benign. In 1880, after multiple arrests for his political advocacy, he left Germany for self-imposed exile in Italy, where he would remain until his death in 1895. But it's during this period that he published some poetry, as well as Sailor Stories, a collection of four short stories inspired primarily by Norse mythology, including Manor (which we’ll get to, don’t worry).
Though Ulrichs saw little legal success in his lifetime, through modern eyes, his greatest failure might be only that he was so far ahead of his time. When he began writing and advocating, the word 'homosexuality' didn't even exist yet ‒ he himself used the term 'Urnings' for gay men, eventually coining terms for variations like 'Mannling' and 'Weibling' (gay male equivalent of 'butch' and 'femme') as well. He also came to recognise bisexuality, lesbian attraction, and even intersex conditions, theorising that all resulted from some combination of male and female characteristics developing in the same individual, as the available knowledge on embryonic development suggested might be possible. For a guy with only Victorian era science to work from, that's still remarkably close to the modern consensus today.
Nor did Ulrichs' work die with him. His writings would go on to inspire and be republished by gay rights movements that followed him ‒ including the work and advocacy of Magnus Hirschfeld, who created what may be the world's first trans-affirming clinic. Even in his own time, responses from his own readers show much his work meant to them, reassured at last that they weren't alone.
So how does a German activist from the 1880s find himself publishing gay vampire fiction based on Norse mythology while living in exile in Italy? I only wish I knew. My sources suggest his main goal with Sailor Stories was to publish something that would sell. Unsurprisingly, given the subject matter it seems to have sold very little. Manor is the third of four short tales, and by far the gayest of them all. It's also (IMHO) by far the best, and the most interesting.
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Set in a Norwegian fishing village, Manor tells the story of the romance between a 15-year-old boy called Har, and the titular Manor, a sailor 4 years his senior, who rescues Har from the wreck which killed his father. In the days that follow, the pair become close, and Manor takes to swimming across the bay on summer evenings to visit Har at his home. And so they meet whenever they can, until tragedy strikes again, and Manor is killed in a shipwreck near the coast, leaving Har inconsolable with grief.
But this being a vampire story, in the nights after Manor’s death, something is seen swimming across the bay to Har’s home, just as Manor used to do. Har is visited night after night by the spectre of his beloved, who lies beside him in bed, strokes his cheek with cold hands, and kisses him with icy lips, draining his blood from his heart, "like an infant at its mother’s breast." Har himself awaits each night with mixed joy and fear, longing to see Manor again, even in such a form.
As Har weakens, the villagers attempt to trap Manor in his grave by hammering a stake through his body, but he continues to visit Har nonetheless, now sporting a gaping wound in his chest. The villagers return with a new stake, widened at the base like a giant nail, and finally, Manor is restrained in his grave. But it’s too late for Har: weakened and heartsick, he dies, begging only that he should be buried beside his beloved at last. Neither rise again. 
Though I can’t speak to how it reads in the original German, in translation, Manor is relayed in largely workmanlike prose. Its tale is short, simple, and sad – but so much about it fascinates me all the same.
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(Draugen, Theodor Kittelsen, 1891)
There’s the incorporation of elements you might better recognise from Norse draugr folklore – revenants more typically associated with deaths at sea, or charged with guarding their own graves ‒ but still far more closely related to the vampires of Slavic mythology than most people probably realise. Manor is also one of painfully few stories which clearly recognises what is surely the original purpose of hammering a stake through a vampire’s body: not to kill it, but to hold the creature down and prevent it from leaving its grave. As a hopeless vampire-nerd (I've presented panels at conventions about this stuff, it's dangerous to get me started), I can’t tell you how much I love those aspects of this story.
But above all, Ulrichs’ tale captures what might be one of the oldest and most traditional versions of the folkloric vampire: the spectre of a lost loved one, and the potent mixture of fear and twisted longing thus inspired, that the weight of their loss might drag you down into death to join them. Many ‘real’ tales of vampirism have been inspired by outbreaks of wasting diseases like consumption, working their way through a family, one member at a time. But in Har’s case, it is clearly grief as much as Manor’s physical visits that claims him. He loves Manor so much that he welcomes his lover back, even as a revenant. In his own way, Har too is cursed by Manor’s death to wander the world like the walking dead, until finally reunited with his lover once more.
Nowadays, tragic love stories like this tend to get an eye roll from a lot of the queer community. The old ‘bury your gays’ trope has been done to death, and we’re largely sick of being told that noble suffering is the best we can hope for. But it’s notable nonetheless that Manor’s sexuality has no bearing on his death, and little about the story would change were Har female. It's far from clear if the rest of the village even recognises Har and Manor's love for what it is, let alone whether they'd disapprove ‒ after all, vampires will often go after friends and acquaintances when lovers and family members are exhausted. As such, it’s hard to read the village’s attempts to keep Manor in his grave as a simple matter of prejudice. They're also genuinely trying to save Har's life.
And yet, the way Har keeps the undead Manor’s visits a secret, even begging for the stake to be removed so they can resume, echoes the real experiences of so many gay and lesbian couples far too clearly to be accidental. And however disturbing to a contemporary audience, Har’s willingness to follow his lover to the grave leaves little doubt of the depths of his feelings. To an audience in the 1800s, even the most cliched example of bury-your-gays would be revolutionary.
Did I mention that this story fascinates me? There are layers to this thing.
For completeness, I’ve also read the rest of Sailor Stories (and you can too at the same link). Only one of the other three tales contains any queer romance: the first, Sulitelma, where a boy called Erich falls for a handsome sailor called Harald he meets aboard a spectral storm ship. But there's no happy ending: his sister falls for the same handsome sailor, and shoves Erich overboard to his death to eliminate her competition.
Atlantis, the second story in the collection, is a direct sequel to Sulitelma, but it's even more bizarre. Erich is barely mentioned, and instead we find ourselves reading a tale which I can only summarise as like something I might have found on fanfiction.net back in the early aughts, written by some 14yo trying to straightwash the original material. Here, Harald and some of his fellows go on shore leave to the land of the phoenix, populated by Greek nymphs and Cupid, and mildly comedic hijinx ensue. It is fascinatingly bizarre, but not exactly satisfying as a read (or a sequel).
The final story, The Monk of Sumboe, tells of how two close friends destroy their relationship and themselves with their fixation on the tale of an alluring siren. There's a solid concept in there somewhere, but it's far too short and abrupt to do much with it, and all the characters remain strictly heterosexual. But if there's one thematic detail that ties it to the rest of the collection (beside the many Norse elements), it's that hopeless longing for something others would warn you away from ‒ whether that be a phantom ship, a visit from a vampire lover, or an elusive siren. None of these tales end well for their protagonists, but we're drawn to sympathise with them nonetheless.
I cannot guess what reception Karl Ulrichs expected in publishing this book. Sailor Stories is neither a work that could expect good reception from mainstream audiences or a defiantly-radical queer masterpiece. What did people make of it in its own time? Was it read and cherished by at least a few boys or men like Har and Manor? I’d hope so, but I’ll probably never know.
If you'd like to read more about Karl Ulrichs, I can recommend (among my sources) this New York Times article for a quick overview of his work, or the various work of Michael Lombardi-Nash and Hubert Kennedy (link 2). You can also read the first chapter of his published correspondence online for free.
A True Story of a Vampire (1894), and Count Eric Stenbock
Our second Victorian vampire tale was first published in English, though it was written by a Swedish Count. Like Carmilla in its own day (and quite unlike Karl Ulrichs), both story and author seem to have flown largely under the radar until many years after publication, the queer subtext little noted or commented upon (if at all).
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If nothing else though, A True Story of a Vampire aptly demonstrates that at least someone of that era spotted what Carmilla was really about – because he wrote his own version, only about men. Stenbock’s tale is effectively a much shorter, gender-swapped version of Carmilla – but with a larger age gap between vampire and victim lending the story uncomfortable pederastic overtones.
"Vampire stories are generally located in Styria; mine is also," it begins – though I couldn’t name you any vampire story from the era besides Carmilla set there. The narrator, the surviving sister of the vampire’s victim, is called ‘Carmela’, if you needed further proof.
Much like in Carmilla herself, the vampire, Count Vardalek (a Slavic term for vampire) arrives at their house after being forced to seek local hospitality when some convenient ‘accident’ interrupts his travels. There, he bewitches and slowly drains the life from her brother, Gabriel – a boy described in terms variously angelic and fey, a wild thing who befriends wild animals and would rather climb a tree to a window than take the stairs to his own room, but who cleans up beautifully for church – a sublime, cinnamon roll of a creature, far too good for this sinful earth, too pure. Gabriel is a true male equivalent of the likes of Dracula’s Lucy, feminised further still by his youth and innocence. Had a vampire not got him, one can only imagine he’d have eventually have been spirited away by the fairies.
Gabriel and the mysterious Count are drawn to one another immediately. Even as Gabriel wastes slowly away, he greets Vardalek eagerly each time he returns by throwing his arms around his neck and kissing him on the lips. Count Vardalek himself seems to be a vampire of the psychic variety, gaining in health and vitality while Gabriel wilts, merely after spending time in one another’s presence. Vardalek himself seems to genuinely regret Gabriel’s inevitable death, but unlike in Carmilla, there’s no rescue at our conclusion. Gabriel dies, and we’re given no reason to assume he’ll rise again.
To the modern reader, the true horror of this tale lies not with the vampires or even the homoeroticism, but with those uncomfortably pederastic implications. Gabriel can’t be more than twelve years old, his youth and innocence emphasised in his every description. Pains are taken to suggest that Gabriel’s own attraction to Vardalek is as much responsible for his fate as the vampire himself. Gabriel’s father is similarly bewitched by this charming stranger, and never recognises the danger, or the reason for his son’s tragic death. Even the narrator, his loving sister, cannot truly hate Vardalek for taking her brother from her – even when her father dies of grief soon after. Gabriel’s fate seems sealed from the moment the Count enters their home.
But knowing how often real child molesters get away with it, their actions excused or downplayed by their family, their victims accused of ‘seducing’ their abusers and made complicit in their own misery… I can only say that, for my money, A True Story of a Vampire is a very effective horror story in ways the author probably never intended, once you start to question the reliability of its narrator.
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It won’t surprise you to learn that the author, Count Eric Stanislaus Stenbock, was a (very) gay man, deeply involved with the gothic and decadent artistic movements of his day. Born to a Swedish Count and an English heiress, Stenbock seems to be remembered less for his writing than for his character. In The Oxford Book of Modern Verse, 1892-1935, W.B. Yeats describes him as a "scholar, connoisseur, drunkard, poet, pervert, most charming of men" ‒ naming Stenbock as an exemplar of the poetic zeitgeist of the age. Notably however, none of Stenbock’s actual poetry is featured in the volume.
Stories about Stenbock are so bizarre that it’s hard to know how much should be believed. Eric Stenbock supposedly travelled with a multitude of exotic pets and a life-sized doll he referred to as his 'son', dabbled in religions ranging from Roman Catholicism to Buddhism, and decorated his dwelling with peacock feathers, oriental shawls, a bronze statue of Eros and a hanging pentagram. One acquaintance once compared him to a 'magnified child': "very fair hair beautifully curled, and a blond, round, blue-eyed face," who paused at the door and "took a little phial out of his pocket, from which he anointed his fingers, before passing them through his locks." But by his thirties, he was already dying of liver disease after years of alcoholism. He passed away at only 35.
Stenbock’s surviving artistic legacy consists of three volumes of poetry and one of prose, with some of those poems including explicit references to Ganymede or male lovers. So how did he escape the same controversy that dogged similar works by other queer creatives of his day, like Oscar Wilde or Walt Whitman – let alone Karl Ulrichs? Well, simple: his work never attracted enough attention to generate real controversy. Stenbock may have been just as much a character as figures like Wilde, but he hadn't nearly the same talent or success.
One last minor biographic detail that may be worthy of note (discovered courtesy of some very poor-quality scans of his one proper biography) is that the youthful Gabriel of A True Story of a Vampire may owe his name to a real Gabriele ‒ a female cousin ten years Stenbock’s junior, whom he would've spent time with in his teens, and seems to have been especially fond of. Whatever the true significance of that name, he'd use it more than once in his fiction: another short story, The Other Side: A Breton Legend, also stars an angelic little boy called Gabriel, with a similar dangerous attraction to the strange. It features some lovely mood and imagery as it sets the scene, but (perhaps as a result of the lack of a suitable model story like Carmilla) it is, in my opinion, a much weaker story overall.
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But again, the most disturbing aspect of Stenbock's biography are the hints about his own relationships with much younger men. His second book of poetry, Myrtle, Rue and Cypress, is dedicated to three people: Simeon Solomon (a gay painter of the pre-Raphaelite movement, whom he met at Oxford), Arvid Stenbock, Eric's cousin, and to "the memory of Charles Fowler" ‒ the son of a Clergyman, who died of consumption at only 16.
This enigmatic dedication is all we know about Stenbock's relationship with Fowler. We don't even know how the they met (Fowler seems to have had a relative at Oxford at the same time as Stenbock, but even this is speculation). But that dedication, in a book which will go on to feature poems about the beauty of Ganymede, or explicitly addressed 'To A Boy' (Tis ever a delight, dear, To gaze upon thy face, To love the life within thee, Fair fashioned, full of grace) makes it hard to read Stenbock's feelings as remotely platonic.
It doesn’t help that the same volume includes a poem about an actual vampire, published ten years before A True Story of a Vampire would ever be penned, but with very comparable subject matter:
With slow soft sensual sips Draw the life from the tender spray, And brush from thy soft lithe lips The bloom of thy boyhood away
It's worth keeping in mind that Stenbock himself would've been only 21 at the time of Fowler's death, and that we don't know whether he ever acted on his attraction (whatever form it may have taken). He may well, as I've seen suggested, have kept his admiration private, idealising the image of the beautiful, dying boy in his final days, in that classic Victorian-gothic way. But it doesn't help that Stenbock's cousin Arvid, from that other dedication in the same book, was 8 years his junior, and that their family apparently disapproved of their relationship as "unnaturally close." Or that another famous Stenbock-associate was Norman O'Neil, a composer whom he met on a London omnibus in 1891, when O'Neil too was only 16. Stenbock was apparently taken by his intelligence and beauty, and would go on to leave him a considerable sum of money in his will. By 1891, Stenbock would've been 31, but his fixations hadn't aged with him.
So how are we to take all this? This was an age where a marriage between a 16-year-old girl and a suitor of Stenbock's age would scarcely have raised eyebrows. Uncomfortable as it may sound today, for many queer youths of the era, a romance with someone older and experienced enough to play mentor may genuinely have represented the safest real option available. There are layers of complicated subtext, meanwhile, in the idea of any gay man of the Victorian era casting himself as a vampiric monster, doomed to ruin the object of their attraction with their very touch. There may be layers more in Stenbock framing his tale as "A true story" before telling us of the misery a foreign Count brought to an innocent family, with his helpless fixation on their youngest child.
It's worth noting also that even in Manor, by Legit Gay Activist Karl Ulrichs, our love story is between a boy of 15 and a man of 19 ‒ an age gap of only 4 years, but large enough at 15 to raise some serious eyebrows. His first story too, Sulitelma, involves attraction between a man and a boy (exact ages unknown). Though Ulrichs explicitly viewed relationships with prepubescent children as reprehensible, he seems to have had no problem with relationships between young teens and much older adults ‒ even printing a story sent in by a reader (details in this article), joyfully recounting how he (the reader) was initiated into the world of male/male love as a 14-year-old by his brother's riding master. Ulrichs saw no reason to disapprove.
To confuse things for anyone looking this up today, google Ulrichs, and you'll find a number of online articles claiming that his own first experience involved being sexually assaulted by a riding instructor when he was only 14. This is wrong on multiple fronts: not only is the story related by Ulrichs as a positive experience, it wasn't even Ulrichs it happened to. No, shit like this would not be okay if it happened today (and frequently wasn't then), but we don't help ourselves by distorting the stories told by our queer forebears to fit modern expectations.
But none of that surrounding context makes the youth of the day any less vulnerable to predation, or Stenbock's fixation on youthful beauty less creepy. Today, no evidence remains to help us guess whether idealising the beauty and innocence of youth was the greatest of Stenbock's actual crimes, or the least of them. Anything is possible.
In brief: welcome to the joy of trying to reconcile the complicated place of pederasty in queer history! I'm afraid you can look forward to seeing a lot of it from here on back.
A True Story of a Vampire is not a bad work of fiction by any means. There are some lovely descriptions and entertaining turns of phrase, and the horror is certainly effective. It may even be considerably more readable than Carmilla to many, simply for being so much shorter. But how you feel about it is really going to be up to you.
One last digression about Carmilla and Christabel
There’s one additional work that I’ve once or twice seen listed as an even earlier queer vampire tale: Samuel Coleridge’s unfinished poem Christabel (1800) – the only problem being there’s no vampire in the story (and how queer it is may be questionable too).
Like Carmilla, Christabel tells of a Baron’s daughter (the titular Christabel) who comes upon a mysterious stranger in apparent distress (Geraldine) and invites her into her home. We never learn what kind of being Geraldine truly is (three further parts were planned in addition to the two that were completed), but when she undresses, Christabel spies something that horrifies her, remembering it later with the words "Again she saw that bosom old / Again she felt that bosom cold." But under Geraldine’s spell, Christabel’s recollection of this incident comes and goes, and Geraldine has soon bewitched her father too.
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All ‘evidence’ that Geraldine was intended to be a vampire rests on such details as Geraldine having to be carried past an iron gate into the house, much as vampires have to be invited in – but that particular vampire trope wasn’t actually codified until a solid century later (like most vampire-tropes, we have Stoker's Dracula to blame). The idea that Geraldine has the cold, shrivelled body of the undead and revives herself on Christabel’s blood is a perfectly valid reading, but the more obvious interpretation would be that she’s some manner of shapeshifting fairy creature, weakened by the iron of the gateway, not the entrance to Christabel’s home. The aristocratic literary vampire had existed for over 40 years and appeared in numerous works of fiction by Carmilla's day; but Christabel predates the origins of the genre a solid two decades. For Coleridge to have come up with the idea independently seems vanishingly unlikely.
I mention Christabel here partly for completeness, but mostly to bring us back around to the greater family of Carmilla, which is still legitimately the first known queer vampire story. Though far better known than any other story discussed here today, how it came about is perhaps the most mysterious.
Sheridan le Fanu was a prolific writer, but I don’t know of any other story he’s penned with subtext like Carmilla's (and I’m not quite invested enough to read all of the rest to check, though someone totally should so I don't have to). Le Fanu was married, and had children, and that's all I can discover about his personal life. Was he some shade of queer himself? Did he have connections to anyone who was? Did he even realise what he was writing with Carmilla? Nothing I’ve read about him provides any answers. Nor can I tell you how many readers spotted the subtext it the story was first published. In its own time, it caused no great scandal, nor even seems to have garnered much attention (by contrast, Byron & Polidori's The Vampyre caused an uproar when it was published in 1819, mostly thanks to Byron's established fame and debates over its true authorship). It took until well into the 20th Century for it to obtain the reputation it has today.
But I’m sure it’s no coincidence that it was Carmilla that spoke to Stenbock enough that he chose to retell it. And while A True Story of a Vampire is still the only other vampire story of the era set in Styria, there was almost another one: Dracula, at least Stoker’s early plans for the novel. Styria also remains part of the unused prequel chapter later published as Dracula’s Guest. The setting isn’t the only detail Stoker nearly-borrowed from Carmilla either, my favourite example being the weird schedule by which both she and Dracula seem to have to be in bed in their coffins at dawn each day, both apparently helpless and immobile in sleep, though both are also repeatedly seen up and about later in the day. Neither tale offers any real explanation.
Have I mentioned lately that Stoker, too, was almost certainly some shade of gay?
Now, the fact that two different queer writers both found Carmilla so very inspiring – and would even both publish their own works of vampire literature within five years of one another – isn’t much to go on, in trying to establish what a story like Carmilla might’ve meant to England’s queer population some twenty years after it was written. Maybe Carmilla was being eagerly passed around London’s own Uranian gothic societies at the time. Or maybe two different men happened upon it by chance in wholly different circumstances, and took very different things from reading it. Maybe Stoker didn’t even notice the queer subtext himself. But I can’t help but wonder if just maybe, there's something more than coincidence at work here.
Carmilla the vampire is an explicitly villainous character, her victim confused and unwilling. But she remains one of the most complex and sympathetic vampires of her era. And perhaps, to a community who had never seen Ulrichs’ writing published in their own language, and might never see themselves represented in fiction except as monsters buried in layers of protective subtext, that still meant something to readers like Stenbock, and Stocker, and who knows how many others.
In short, maybe old, gay vampire stories like these really are worth remembering. I'll leave that one up to you.
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l0stfoster · 7 months ago
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You guys are sat good okay.
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I don't even think I can classify this as an AU because I had zero ideas in mind for it beyond Parry. It's just so I can draw them being gay. BUUT IF WE ARE CALLING IT AN AU, this is what I got so far: - Darry & the rest of his gang (excluding Dally and Ace) are werewolves (funny little pack, as they should be) - Ace and Dally are vampires! Both were born as such. - Vamps and Werewolves are pretty common amongst Tulsa, even amidst the socs so there's no discrimination on that fact, just the greasers being poor. - Vampire Socs beef EXTRA with Werewolf Greasers though. - The book events happen pretty similarly to the ones in Cursed; Johnny and Dally live, Bob dies, you get the drill. - Paul and Darry also go through their "friends to lovers to enemies to enemies with benefits to lovers" arc here too. - Paul is NOT naturally a vampire. - The premise is simple though, happens after he's already dating Darry. Paul gets attacked by a few vampires (number to be decided & if they're socs or greasers to be decided) and was SUPPOSED to die after being food for them, but turned instead. They left just enough blood in his body for him to cling to life long enough to turn from the venom - Paul showing up at Darry's place covered in blood, sharp teeth n pointed ears, and 2 shades paler: "You will NEVER guess what happened lol (automatically passes out)" That's all I have for an actual storyline. Yeah gay people fuel. Steviepop is canon here bc they're all dumb dogs but I'm more focused on the Parry. This is the only doodle I've made of them its been a rough week so I haven't drawn much
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sn0wbat · 1 month ago
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whoops! all ace
details and stuff under cut <3
Rune: gay ace. doesn't realize it for the longest time though, so he just calls himself gay because well. still got that romantic attraction. he also has like no experience, so he figures that's all there is anyway. right? haha.
Einarr: aroace. just completely aromantic and asexual. a thousand years of no attraction whatsoever should be more than enough proof. indeed, he's repulsed by it. just leave him alone.
Morten: mainly aroace as well, though they miiiiight be slightly grey. it's super rare though.
Bat: he was 14 upon turning. but yeah, he's asexual for sure, romance absolutely gives him the ick as well, and he refuses the acknowledge the secret third thing. which is platonic.
as for the other flags featured:
rune gets the most classic pride flag of them all - the original gilbert baker one, because well. it just fits. he was born in the 1970s. why not.
einarr is a trans man. socially transitioned in his mortal time, physically changed in his vampire time. obviously it wasn't the terminology he used back then, but he sure is around now as an immortal thousand year old, and agrees that this does describe him.
morten is a certified flag and label hoarder, and is probably the one who knitted all these scarves. their scarf is the nonbinary flag. they're also holding the sunset aroace flag, the trans flag, and the demiboy flag, which... doesn't fully encapsulate their gender, but sure. close enough. their exact gender is wild, shifting, and impossible to pinpoint. a moving target, really. (honestly? what a mood)
bat gets the agender flag. in all honesty he's more apathetic about this gender stuff more than anything. he doesn't care much for labels, he's really just a creature. but he likes the colors so why the hell not, really. he's also totally okay with it/its pronouns, but doesn't really push for it. on his wrist he got the aro flag because again, colors.
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