#he should drop the names you know
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“... I couldn't find another actor to do "Variety's Actors on Actors" with me because they were too afraid to go and talk about this movie. and it doesn't matter, that's okay, that's not to point a finger at anybody. I've gotten to do a lot of great things.”
#he should drop the names you know#but that's just me#god he's so passionate about this thing#and i keep thinking about it#because people keep saying he's doing it just for the awards and baby#at this point i don't think he's gonna be part of the group you know?#with this whole boycotting thing seems kinda impossible#but he's been saying this since the boogeyman started in 2016. and through the years his thoughts on him are just the same#so... yeah makes me feel kinda frustrated#deleting this later#sebastian stan#sebastianstanedit#sebstanedit#fysebastianstan#sstanedit#stansclan#sebastiansource#gbbb
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#mrs flood who are you: time lord edition
#dwedit#doctor who#mrs flood#fifteenth doctor#the master#jacobi!master#tenth doctor#jack harkness#martha jones#twelfth doctor#ninth doctor#*#okay here is my argument: mrs flood IS a time lord but her presence here has nothing to do with the doctor#instead she's here because of ruby. she's seemingly part of/related to the pantheon of discord & we know that ruby is connected to them too#so i think that she was deliberately placed as ruby's neighbor by the pantheon/oldest one/ruby's mom/? in order to watch over her#it also explains why she was there to check on ruby in 1.04. once she realizes she's on the phone w carla she says 'nothing to do with me'#and she leaves. which implies that it COULD have had something to do with her. if it had been something else going on#ANYWAY. to get to the time lordness of it all. rn i personally believe that she's a time lord that's been hiding on earth for 50+ years#bc i don't think she recognized the police box as a tardis initially. that first quote should be taken at face value.#instead picture this: she's watching over ruby as per usual. a police box is there - weird but nbd. then it dematerializes in front of her.#she drops her groceries. she's shocked. she kinda looks scared. if she already knew it was a tardis why would she react like that?#so imo she knows OF tardises. she DIDN'T know the police box was one. and she's worried the time lords have found her hence the fear.#but when nothing happens and nobody comes at her she realizes she's still safe#later when she sees the doctor she realizes the tardis is his/he must be a time lord. he doesn't identify her but that's happened before#so then when she asks him who he is i think what she's actually asking for is his title. WHICH time lord are you.#bc lbr if she knows abt tardises then she knows about time lords and if she knows abt time lords she knows what it means for ruby#to be joining him - and that's why she wishes ruby good luck. meanwhile this is clearly the outcome she WANTS (them to be together)#bc she gets visibly upset when the doctor seems to decide to leave without ruby.#and for once i'm not master clowning bc the list of names the doctor gives out is VERY interesting. some of them we've never heard before:#the bishop; the conquistador; later he adds the pedant and sagi-shi and reiterates the bishop AGAIN. so i wonder if she's the bishop.....
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granby + iskierka + keynes
#em draws stuff#em is posting about temeraire#temeraire#iskierka#john granby#doctor keynes#<- I do not know if keynes ever gets a first name so This Shall Do for tagging purposes for the present moment#speaking of which. my logic here is that granby is always getting whopped upside the head and stabbed and shot and dropped from high places#and therefore I think he should maybe cultivate his relationship with his crew's surgeon. because he is going to Need to.#keynes now. My Friend Keynes. I reallyreally would like to know More About Him and how exactly someone ends up as an aerial corps SURGEON#what is UP with this man I would like to KNOW about him#I would like to write fic even maybe. Hello Sir. Your Backstory?#designwise he ended up looking like patrick gallagher who you may be aware of for his role as awkward davies masterandcommander#which was not entirely intentional but I did end up leaning into it as I went on with the drawing.#he looks a lot like many people's version of tharkay here... I should make an effort for distinguishing them by drawing More Tharkays.#either way. keynes and gong su my favorite tem characters I don't really see anyone drawing. my underappreciated blorbos...#(this is maybe because I'm only on book 3 but) keynes is certainly on page a deal more than certain fellows I could name#anyWay. we are slowly creeping up to drawing BigLarge Iskierka but not all the way there yet. Stay Tuned.
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Thinking abt Kae’s Fatui verse,,,,
#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#//Him having a sort of fatal attraction vibe goin with Traveler like Came||ya’s whole thing almost hdbfb#//The whole ‘you’re interesting; I really like you; I can’t WAIT to see what makes you tick’#//Except he might actually be more of a danger to them; considering his endgame for those he ‘loves’#v; l’innamorato (fatui!kaeya)#//The love idea of him v attached to Signora; deffo got along with the kiddos of the HotH better fjhdh#//Prolly loved presenting her W|ll Sm|th style; even if the attention it drew to him too did make his skin crawl more often than not#//Love the idea of him stalking Traveler thru their journeyw lil heart eyes; interfering at key moments to hinder or help them progress#//Depends on how he’s feeling at the moment jcbcb#//In this verse would deffo butt heads with Taru in Fontaine specifically—he wants Traveler’s attention too jfbfb#//Prolly met them in Mond as part of Signora’s lil entourage—IMMEDIATELY got intrigued at first glance#//Background wise; I like to think he was a Fatuus meant to infiltrate the knights like many of Eroch’s ppl#//And in the progress of going through the knight thing got acquainted w Luc & began to have doubts abt the Fatui cause#//After visiting his home; hearing abt and meeting his father; then the day of the Heckening happens & they fight#//Bc Kae already planned to come clean & renounce the Fatui & Khaenri’ah; but the mess Crepus’s death made of him#//Tried far too hastily; far too bluntly to tell Luc the truth of his origins; swearing he knew nothing abt the Delusion#//Only to get claymore’d; which absolutely helped cemented him into the Fatui’s ranks more#//A part of him knows it wasn’t the time to say it; that he is at fault for trying to take advantage of Luc’s vulnerable state to tell him#//Only for the lad to have been far too volatile & so it turned out badly; but he still blames Luc for the break of their bond#//Anywho; I like to think as of Inazuma; he does have a certain grudge against traveler bc of Signora#//Before; encounters were more of puppy love bordering on dangerous obsession—after that; the dangerous bit became Personal#//Ohhh I’m writing a yandere here; okay<-should have realized that from the FIRST slew of Fatuiverse hcs lmao#//He genuinely does love Traveler; would like to see them breaking down in despair in his arms#//The two of them together would make a most beautiful ice sculpture indeed#//Even with his grudge; Traveler does stand a chance at swaying him to actually be helpful#//Sumeru quest wise; Co||ei is the magic word—i like to think he came along with there bc he wanted to see abt the Eleazar#//And maybe find clues to her family or even her herself; Traveler or Paimon dropping the name would make him cooperate SO fast#//Klee in Mond is basically his Teucer jffb. She is as good as fam in his eyes—I like to think he keeps up his habit of collecting pyro ppl#//Bc he never got over his broken bond with SOMEONE. Even if this verse has him more bitter abt it#//But ye jdbdbd. Is it rlly a Allie posting if it not short lol blurb and then heckin TAG SPAM lololol
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Could I possibly request some Tk? Travis konecny, rat man himself?
tails!
i know rat in hockey terminology is like . yeah? but every time i think more in the nutcracker direction . get in the mecha (rat suit) shinji (travis konecny)
#philidelphia flyers#ask tag#ask game#neon tetrart#travis konecny#i need to be honest rn#i know virtually 0 players outside the sharks#and i have to do some backreading and researching to feel a little more confident on the vibes of it#which says more about me than anyone else#and i am telling you all of this#first of all thank you for full name dropping i would not get anywhere with 'tk nhl' on search engine LMAO#second of all oh god hes popular should i know him#im getting a bad grade at hockey
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#hmm🫤#is it time to abandon this desperate desire to meet someone organically in person and finally wade into the world of online dating?#obviously. i would still be incredibly open to meeting someone organically#but is it time to start actively looking online??#30yrs is not that far off for me and....I'm ready to have that person who is *my person*#the person i can call when I'm lonely and not feel like a loser because i know they want to share in my company as much as i do theirs#someone who will kiss my forehead and let me lean against them while we watch a movie#someone who will play new board games with me and maybe even some Dnd#i was feeling the Big Sad Lonely last night so today I got out of the house and drove into the city to go to a few shops...#...and just drive in the traffic (I'm a weirdo who actually enjoys city driving on highways)#and one shop i went to was a big game and ttrpg store (so much awesome stuff)#when i checked out i had such a lovely pleasant and fun interaction with the guy at the checkout#he was kinda handsome. not a chad by any means but he seemed cool and had such an attractive voice#and i know nothing about him/his values/his life--not even his name#but i tell you. if that store wasn't 1.5hrs from my house--I'd be dropping in a lot more often just to maybe get to know him a little better#he was so nice and i felt like there was some chemistry there???#maybe??????#but i feel like the odds of us actually sharing all/most of the same values are low so I'm just torturing myself by dwelling on it probably#the ramblings of a dragon#i want a man. a fun godly. creative man#maybe i should be looking online 🫠
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FIRST FULLY FINISHED ART IN THIS BLOG WOOO!
The Great King himself:
It took me so long to find a way to draw him, but the biggest pain of this whole piece was HIS DAMN HAMMER
I just have a hard time drawing weapons or any objects in general but anyways-
I am actually very proud of how this turned out
Pogger moment:
#kirby fanart#king dedede#dedede#that's the name you should know#he's the king of the show#nlg he kinda looks like he could drop those banger cereal ads at anytime
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me and the generic extra strong Tylenol and the pure rage in my system
#Every once in a while I think. It’s not too bad home. I’m over dramatic. It’s not bad and it won’t be bad when I go home and never been bad#Then actually think and remember#I shouldn’t have been hit as a small child. I thank god that my parents stopped that with me.#But also. I should have been taken seriously when I went To them with concerns and shouldn’t have been brushed off.#But also to be a 14 something year old and to realize your parents aren’t in love is a crushing feeling#Since that must have been when. 13-14. Appa passed. Pandemic times. I’m sure my father. Since this would have been the last time I saw Appa#We went down to visit. Dad didn’t go he had work. He sent us off. I remember sitting in the passenger seat by mom in driver#Dad praying for our safe travel and for him going in for a kiss and the moment of hesitation and unwant from my mother#And the awkward silence and the way everything seemed to just shift to the side#That was summer of 2019. My first time realizing my parents weren’t both in love happened when I was 13-14.#I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.#And going to college has me feeling so guilty. Like I fucking ditched my siblings? The kids I raised as a child myself?#(I had to go. I don’t know if my scholarship would have held I don’t know if my financial aid would have held. I couldn’t have waited. )#(I would have likely done something bad to myself. Genuinely. If I weren’t able to be here. If I had to stay. I wouldn’t survive that.)#my siblings are fine. They have no responsibilities. My sister is manipulative. They will manage. They want me to get the education I need#They aren’t going to have to use their own college money to pay to be able to eat because the parents won’t feed them for the summer#I went into college with at least a couple hundred less than I should have. Because I had to parent. I had to feed my siblings.#And I had to pay to fill the gas tank on my father’s gas eater truck. We couldn’t be home because of the selling home situation.#I had to do something to get us out and to feed us but I didn’t get paid back for anywhere near all of it#I don’t regret it. But a kid shouldn’t have to pay for them and their siblings to live.#But then I remember the dread I have for returning ‘home’ for the breaks. I don’t know what I’m going to do.#If I can’t work all of the breaks then I either won’t be able to pay next semester#Or I’ll have almost no money in savings. Like nothing to my name. Can’t buy gas. Can’t do anything. Can’t buy food.#Unless the next scholarship stuff I’m doing pulls through. But I’m willing to work the whole break just to get away from either house.#I want to violently shake my parents and get them to comprehend#Father you have dropped 260$ into my bank account in the last two weeks. Why could this not be earlier in the semester.#Why couldn’t that be in the time and fashion you FUCKING PROMISED for helping me pay my schooling?#You have money to spare. Stupid. Why couldn’t you help like you promised.#Mom you fucker. I get that you are kinda with a new man now. But you’re leading yourself into a relationship with a man you said yourself#You don’t want to date because he wants to move away with his sister and because he hates it here
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the flash should have ended with barry quitting his job at ccpd to become a stay-at-home husband and that's on that
#the fun part is it genuinely could have ended like that. i have no idea. still haven't watched it#NOBODY TELL ME BTW#THAT IS NOT ME ASKING FOR SPOILERS. I'LL GET TO IT#but honestly it's the only thing that makes sense. i have genuine reasons for this#namely: how the fuck is iris. an incredible but ordinary non-speedster woman. meant to look after a baby speedster#ordinary babies are already making it their life's mission to die. eating shit they shouldn't. rolling over and suffocating.#idk i don't know about kids but i know babies are breakable and will roll off tables and god knows what else#now imagine you have a toddler and she can literally move at hundreds of miles per hour#how the fuck was iris meant to cope?#i still maintain that when they did the 'she put a power dampener in nora' plot it should have been like. not a control thing#but also yeah. literally a control thing because HOW THE FUCK ELSE WAS SHE MEANT TO LOOK AFTER HER BABY#if barry is gone and she's a single mother. assuming no other speedsters are around to help her. what the fuck else was she meant to do?#of course she had to suppress her powers because how can you stop your toddler running into traffic if she can run 1000 times faster than u#how do you keep her in her crib at night if she can phase through the bars?#in that sense. yeah it's fucked up. but you can understand it. you can empathize. what other options did she have?#so yeah stay-at-home dad barry is the only thing that makes sense for genuine safety reasons#he is quite literally the only one who can keep up with the kids#they dropped the ball on nora is all i'm saying. again. fic that lives in my head where original nora's death actually means something#and we get a new nora who is ACTUALLY a different person. as she would be considering her whole upbringing was different#and she has to somehow live up to the memory of a version of her that was erased from time#part of barry and iris can't accept that that specific version of their daughter is gone and it's not her#THE ANGST POTENTIALLLL#in my head she doesn't even go by nora because she's like. THAT'S NOT ME. SHE DIED. WHY CAN'T YOU ACCEPT WHO I AM AND LOVE ME FOR ME#she goes by dawn bc yeah im still kinda sad they didnt use that name#fictional characters give ur kid an original name instead of always naming them after dead ppl challenge#my fics#my meta
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Have some art stuff! I'll leave context for a bit of these in the tags, but basically: Smokey and Bizzle make people smile, college doodles, Roach being an asshole but not a bigot, me when Inside Out 2 (loved it so much holy shit) and Shrignold adopted the maggot from the end of DHMIS 3 (love cult episode)
Bizzle is @spiritzee 's character and the Desmond guy is...complicated, but I'm tagging the creator just in case @sp00kysh4rk0
#original character#ocs#digital art#traditional art#dhmis roach#dhmis shrignold#dhmis smokey#inside out 2#inside out anxiety#so first ones are Smokey and Bizzle trying to bring happiness and smiles to the world and failing immediately#i should post my other college doodles. most are of me suffering which is also most of my college experience#also yes I'm in college#our economy might be shit but education's free and pretty good#Roach is that one guy who gets into a fight with a trans guy and then gets into a fight with the principal after he said to not fight a girl#i know the inside out stuff is very ugly but i was rushed and I'm bad at drawing shaped characters#alright so y'know the maggot that gets out the egg and goes “FATHA” at the end of dhmis 3?#yeah I turned him into a creepy kid and Shrignold adopts him cause he reminds him of himself as a kid#and the tree guy who's also Shrignold's adoptive dad teases him like “aww he's doing the same creepy stare you gave to the guests#also the kid's name is Jeremy cause it's the first kid name i could think of#the Leggy owner thing is cause technically I'm the owner of the character now i think? but I still feel i should tag the creator#all this doesn't make sense and i know but also don't care I'm just dropping stuff every so often to make sure you know my hands still work
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My main takeaway from TSC now being the second trilogy is that I'm gonna spend the next two books waiting for Stuart to do his routine of showing up out of nowhere, being an absolute cunt for no reason, and then leaving at least one more time. Do I think it will happen? No, I didn't even expect it the first time. But a girl can dream.
#I also like being able to fully call it the second trilogy it's such a neat separation from original canon that recognizes the time that has#between installments. and its simmetrical and scratches my brain. win win#other niche thing that I will need is a name drop or truly just any confirmation that Ichirou's fiance is real#only because I truly don't believe she exists. also RIP my man for getting married at 24 I still mantain he should have been at the club#Nora Sakavic has the chance to be the funniest person alive and make that fiance Allison.#absolutely implausible AND impossible but it would be. So funny. You go queen canonize the rare pair you basically made up for a tumblr pol#third niche thing is that I want more Zane. i know that one we're definitely going to get unless chekovs gun gets shoved up someones ass#my guess is he's either gonna be a whistleblower for the press or kill himself in front of Jean. no in between. 50/50 odds honestly#i say niche bc I am fully aware I am the only person in this fandom that fucks with Zane#but that's fine. a boy would be the son of France etc etc etc#stuart hatford
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Eternal gales isat au except Bloom is the one looping and she never fucking escapes due to the curse of being 9 years old. Oh and also the middle aged woman actively sabotaging her at every step of the way ig
#rat rambles#eternal gales#for context in the main version of the au I have au aris as loop and as such in any swapped looper hypotheticals their loops would be their#au antag counterpart and just so happens bloom has by far the worst one to be stuck with#all the other au antags would play varying degrees of nice but au bloom very much Would Not.#au bloom's whole motivation in canon eg was kickstarted by their original universe being destroyed after all#and to have that happen after being stuck in timeloop hell? she would Not be ready to let the universe fuck her over without a fight#and this is only one drop in the bucket of many Many reasons that bloom would have a unquely fucked up and horrific time if she was looping#fydd wouldn't have a great time either but I do think au fydd would be nicer to him no matter how low that bar is#au fydd would be incredibly unstable and angry but he wouldn't necessarily blame fydd for that I think#seeing his literal younger self go through what had broken him as a teenager would probably get him to try to keep it together#he'd understand theyre both victims that got massively fucked over#au sier would probably get closest to loop in terms of helpfulness but probably still less helpful if that gives you any idea of how#useless these fuckers would be like even the ones who would legitimately try would just sorta suck at it I think#owl in particular would probably be Way too stuck in the playing mysterious zone to be very helpful#au fydd just wouldn't know shit nor know how to go about explaining shit#au aris would be very very distant with their advice and take a very mia appreach to things (take a clost look at your evidence esc)#au mase would be dead silent 99% of the time#and as said au bloom would be actively sabotaging everything at any chance she could get#now aris and sier are so nicies to me by having au antags that already have easy loop names#owl already altered her name in canon after all and while uni isnt here au aris can still borrow their name#thank god sier isnt the main character here if the act 6 twist was revealed with sier awf owl full name drop thatd be horrible lol#isat spoilers#justttt realized that I should add that. thats what happens when you post at 4 am ig#speaking of time to pass out
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"Your first full season in the American League (Stockton Heat 2016-17; AHL) you played with Garnet Hathaway, Brandon Bollig and Jamie Devane. And I'm wondering—those are 3 tough guys. Did you guys do any work together? Did you ask them for tips and stuff? Because in prepping for this podcast, I'm watching all your fights and like, brother, you know what you're doin'! You know what I mean? You're counter-punching Maroon, you got a good grab, control, you're coming in, you know which guys are lefties so you're working that strategically. You really know what you're doing!"
"Yeah, that's—It's something that... I always love being aggressive and fighting, and stuff like that. So I was always drawn towards these guys—Growing up, watching the tough guys, you watched Don Cherry; my favourite part was always the fighting and the big hitting, and stuff like that. Once I turned pro—every tough guy I played with—I would ask to drop the gloves and for them to show me something.
Whether it's something they always do, something they don't want a small guy like me to do to them...just picking up tips from every single one of them. Huge shoutout to those guys! I played with a lot of tough guys, especially in the American League, and every one of them showed me something that I carry with me to this day.
Right to the first guy: [...] in my Stockton days. He was a Toronto legend growing up where I grew up. He was my stall-mate, he's such a badass, cool dude. I remember dropping the gloves with him in practise, and asking him to show me some things. I'm always trying to learn, and do different things.
When I first started fighting although I asked for—to show me... it's not too comparable because our fighting styles are a little bit different; he fights a different caliber-type of fighter than I do. When I first started fighting I was more a straight defensive fighter—you know, you hold on and when you see an opportunity you punch, and other than that it's a pretty boring fight. And then as you get more comfortable and you start to learn a little bit more—get punched in the face a couple times and realise, you know, it doesn't hurt all that much...then you can start to try new things. I still remember the first time I ever threw a left punch in a fight! Definitely a lot of trial and error...
Jamie Devane, specifically—actually, I remember I got in a fight...Jarred Tinordi blew up Rasmus Andersson in the middle of the ice. I can't remember the hit exactly, but it was elbow to the dome. It could've been clean, I don't know. I remember looking around... we had some tough guys on our team, like we said—none of them were on the ice. I'm looking around like 'Aw, fuck. I'm gonna have to...I guess it's my number, I'll go...'
I go over and I fight him, we grab on and he punched me once—whatever. I go to punch him, I'm like this far from his face...
...So I realise 'Oh god, this isn't gonna work out very well.' I kind-of just hold him out there as much as I can...He's just punching my helmet, I couldn't sleep on this (my left) side of my head for like 2 weeks! Helmet's broken, it doesn't click anymore—Helmet's broken.
I get in the locker room, I'm like throwin' my shit and Devane was actually—I don't know if he was hurt or scratched that game—comin' out of the shower and sees me all pissed off, he's like, 'What the fuck happened?' I'm like, 'This fucking—fuck, Tinordi!' and he was like right away, 'Did he string you out?' And I'm like, 'Yeah, I couldn't fucking touch him! I couldn't get in there!' He's like, 'Alright, tomorrow (because it was a back-to-back) I'll go out with you and I'll show you what to do when that happens.'
He showed me what to do. If it happens again I'm gonna revert back to what he said. I would imagine it's gonna work because he's been in that situation multiple times where he's stringed guys out. He told me what guys do against him and what works and what doesn't.
It's things like that: where I'll go out of my way or they would go out of their way—but just that respect to acknowledge how tough...these guys are...they're just as willing to help out a guy that's willing to do something like that for his teammates."
The Buzz Pod | 8.7.24 (x)(x)
"[Devane] is one tough customer! Obviously a lot of guys listening to this probably have no idea who he is 'cuz he's an AHL-lifer, but guys he's—"
"I've never seen that guy lose a hockey fight once! Never seen him lose a fight!"
"He's as tough as they come, man!"
#ryan lomberg#i think its so important to hear this fighting diatribe from lombo#it is very much quintessential to lombos fighting philosophy#its a long doozy (4 minutes) but very worth it#go read/listen to it#also ahl appreciation for the grinders#my ears gave up trying to understand which player he named as his stallmate and i shant try to understand it#very much obsessed with lombo sparring with every guy he meets to gain fighting tips like hes natsu dragneel#welcome to lombos fight club#can he please drop a list of all the players hes learned from i need it so bad#also getting the shit beat out of him that devane was like okay well ill teach you what to do so that doesnt happen again#also because lombo was throwing a hissy fit XD#do you know how genuinely wild it is to say “everyone one of them showed me something that I carry with me to this day” about FIGHTING#WHAT ARE YOU A SHONEN PROTAGANIST#WHAT IS THAT#i need to lie down for a long time i love and miss my wife so much#she should be fighting for us :(
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thinking of the very likely possibility there are true crime channels in the rgg universe and one (1) person has probably looked into masato's ''''''death'''''. for shits and giggles of course.
#snap chats#just got my spanish exam back and i love it when profs are like 'your lowest grade'll be dropped'#bestie i KNOW this'll be my lowest grade i just wanted to test the waters for how exams will go </3 i promise not to suck next time </3#anyway main text post time. NO BUT DO YOU THINK#cause arakawa was infamous before and people knew of his son then but esp after the kamurocho k3 shit#his name DEF exploded and people DFE got nosy.....#i dont think anyone would have figured out that aoki was masato but maybe one (1) person figured he wasnt really dead#i still wanna know how masato's public death went..#but yeah can you imagine. going on youtube and some girl is talking about your fake death like it really happened and is speculating#and you just get to sit in your governor chair like Lol.#IMAGINE IF THE POOR LASS GETS FUCKIN. NECKED FOR THATLKEJKLJ#i dont think aoki would consider some random youtuber as an actual threat but that'd be hilarious if he did#anyway i just think we should exploit social media and the sort more with rgg characters#i think itd be really funny and the peak of comedy if we acknowledged how Actual people might react to shit#i mean... we already got vtubers interacting with the fuckinnn yakuza.. cant get more ridic than that.. lol..#ok bye im learning spanish now
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#Spotify#music for when you’re driving to ace hardware to buy mousetraps so you can kick out that mouse like Nick Cave says#and when you get there you give him your best friend’s phone number bc you unfortunately have it memorized and he goes to ace hardware all#the time for work#and the guy on the register squints at you and confirms the very male name on the screen#and you resist the urge to squeak out an excuse and just confirm#and then you stop by aldi on the way back and buy two tubs of Greek yogurt and two bottles of synergy kombucha#bc even though you brew your own and actually have way more than you could possibly handle rn bc it’s so hot in your house#you are a sucker for limited edition flavors and it will cause you to spend $8 on kombucha#so you buy pomelo lemonade and cherry coconut lemongrass#which is the summer flavor named unity or something#and you usually get one every year#but you still feel ridiculous walking out of aldi with two tubs of yogurt and two bottles of kombucha and nothing else even though no one#you know sees you even though west ********* is crawling with acquaintances#and then you get back in your car and you’re proud of the rare burst of executive function which allowed you to finally put the new battery#in your car keys even though you stole the battery from target like two months ago you just couldn’t figure out how to open the damn thing#and the convenience is novel and you think wow maybe I should injure my ribcage more often if it’s forcing me to take care of all these#tiny tasks like buying mousetraps and replacing your key battery and cooking figs in honey et cetera#and you drive down the hill and see low clouds snagging in the blue ridge mountains and feel alright for a moment#and go to the scratch and dent where you buy butter and a couple 33¢ seltzers and a diet ginger ale as a lil treat#and when you get back home you drop it on the gravel road and the ginger ale begins to leak out so you put your mouth to it even though the#thought of what nonsense is on the outside of the can from the manufacturing and shipping process lingers#and by the time you get to the kitchen and pour it over ice in a mason jar it’s fairly flat from the burst of bubbles when you poured it#awkwardly with one hand#and you drink what remains on the porch where it’s a post-rain subdued sky sort of dusk#and you think about how much it’s gonna hurt to leave and how you have no other option because of how entwined you’ve become with someone#who is the entire city and the entire vast forest and possibly the entire ecological region#and then you’re still hungry so you eat some meal prepped overnight oats that were for tomorrow morning. the end#journal
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retconning stroud out of the deep roads so i can shove laure amell and the hawke siblings and varric and anders all into the same little camp. they would all have such a bad time
#carver: dying of blight. with an inferiority complex. but mostly dying#danie: MY BROTHER!!! MY BABY BROTJER HELP HIM!!!!!#anders: oh god oh fuck. wait a minute. i recognize this area. isnt this where the commander should be? oh hell#varric: we are all going to 🪦die⚰️ in a 🕳 hole. not even a GOOD hole#warden commander laure amell of ferelden and amaranthine: oh. anders. glad you're not dead or a darkspawn but Why The Fuck Are You Here#anders: oh hell. uh.#warden commander laure amell of ferelden and amaranthine: actually shut up. darkspawn incoming. its too open here so follow me to camp#'uh- commander-' 'shut it. there are shrieks about. this is a nasty area to be in with non-wardens' [glaring disapprovingly]#they awkwardly walk to camp. sigrun and a couple other wardens are there. they all sit down & drop their stuff#amell sits on a stump and pulls out a corked bottle. pops the cork. sniffs it. takes a swig. her white hair almost seems to glow?#she coughs then asks anders 'so why *are* you this far in the deep roads with a band of nonwardens? how'd you even get here?'#anders pulls out the map and hands it over. she looks at it. her expression darkens. she rolls up the map and says 'Anders.' he looks up.#she whaps him on the head with the map and gripes 'do you have ANY idea how long I spent looking for these fucking maps?!' whap 'you dick!'#she whaps him one more time then stuffs the maps into her bag. 'that still doesn't tell me WHY you're here. out with it.'#varric speaks up: 'my asshole brother locked us in a thaig. we came down on an expedition and found an idol that he betrayed us for'#amell frowns. 'a *thaig*? there aren't any records in the shaperate of any out this far. this isn't even a main branch of the deep roads.'#'it could be ancient!' sigrun offers 'or an unsavory secret the shaperate 'lost'. like Caridin?' amell nods & turns back to varric.#'so you're looking for a way out.' they nod. 'and just happened to come by this way?' anders says 'no commander- we need your help.'#amell takes another swig of her bottle. her hair is definitely glowing slightly. 'who *doesn't* these days. but for a pair of old friends-'#she winks at anders. 'what is it you need?' danie interrupts. '-please- my brother is sick- if you can't help him he'll die!'#amell looks at hawke then at carver. gets up and steps over to him. kneels in front of him and unceremoniously grabs his face#tilts his chin up (carotid + jugular blackened) peels his eyelid back (sclera greying and bloodshot) pries open his mouth (tongue greying)#then releases his head and stands shaking her hands. 'oh yeah. that's blight for sure. this is why you sought me out?' anders nods.#'we'll take him. but you know- he may not survive the joining.' 'any chance is better than letting him die!' 'i agree.' amell says coolly.#'youre lucky. we can do it here but the prep will take time. rest. eat. be on your guard. and DO NOT touch my whiskey if you're not a mage.'#it takes like a day of prep. also no one has used amell's name so they havent figured out the Cousins thing yet#eventually amell pulls carver over to the fire and hands him a cup of the joining potion and says 'you get one warning. *don't flinch.*'#he drinks it. he lives. but he's unconscious. amell sends the party on their way#to anders: here. i found this not long after you left. *hands him the phylactery* you and justice be careful. it's getting chaotic out there#to hawke: for what it's worth im sorry. if ever you need the wardens' assistance i grant it under the authority of warden-commander amell
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