#he loves elio. it is strange for him to say because he was elio. at one point. he isnt anymore. maybe thats why he Can say it.

[mxdotpng]

i know if i just started drawing them elio mavis and atlas would take the world by storm (unrealistic) but that would require drawing them regularly.

[flower-yi]

(just sending the ask again bc tumblr crashed when I send it orz, so I'm sorry if it shows up double!)

hii, its octopus/viioletnoir from ao3 :> just read your new chapters, and for the prompt thingy, may I request nr. 36 with Bladie please? ♡♡

I hope you have a wonderful day!!

36. Helping brushing their hair after a shower. | "One summer, I taught myself how to announce in Latin to the world that I wanted nothing at all, when, in truth, I was desperate to be heard, understood, loved; my name a warm memory; There was the wind and the ocean, and in it there were whales that lowed in the darkness like the onset of collapse; There was this dark will, and what could I say but my name and what hurt?" All I Know, Paul Guest

It is sudden, and it is new: the image of Blade sat in front of a dresser, reflection showing you behind him. His hair is wet, damp from a shower, and his normally pale skin flushes with a hint of crimson—some sort of sign that he’s alive, but barely.

You admit it’s strange. Blade is not one to be… coddled like this, but sometimes, for how predictable he is, he can be spontaneous.

“You look nice.” Blade feels nice in your embrace, arms wound gently around his shoulders; tiptoe barely helping in reaching him. He is silent, like always—only ever making a sound as a response, and this time, the noise that leaves him is warm.

When you look at the mirror, his eyes has slipped close and a pleasant air wafts around him.

Oh, you can’t help but comment on it. “A shower can get you like this, huh? Mm, well… I like it. It suits you.”

It hangs in the air, your compliment. You don’t divulge further that he looks alive like this, few minutes out of the shower, because Blade, right now, has a countenance of someone normal—someone you’d see in the streets and not regret knowing.

“Mm… thank you.”

“Oh, manners?” You press a soft kiss to his cheek. “You’re being nice today. I wonder what’s happened.”

The both of you don’t have to wonder, really. It’s one of the few moments there’s no imminent scripts to play out because Elio decided to take a rest in some rare fashion. All of the hunters dispersed to places they normally reside when not called, and in Blade’s case, it is with you.

You make barely a move of your arms to put them elsewhere and a bandaged hand comes up to wrap itself around, as if to stop you. Then, something cold grazes your skin, and with a glance down, you see the tip of his nose pressing onto your arm, and— and he sighs.

Stunned, you fall silent.

Another breath. “We have all day,” his voice rumbles, as if to say do not leave.

Blade’s voice allows you to get your bearings, and you say, in response, “I just want to brush your hair, silly,” You press another kiss on him, this time on the back of his head. With his grip loosening, as if some form of relief has made itself clear, your arms fall back.

A hairbrush is within your hold, one that’s been barely used. It’s Blade’s, something you’ve bought him months ago, but only now has it returned to your hand since the day you brought it home.

(Blade’s reaction when you got it was a simple appreciative hum, and he returned to whatever he was working on.

You remember leaving a lipstick mark on his face before he went out on a mission. He came home with a storm in his eyes.

It was in tact. Barely been touched at all, despite how disheveled his clothes were.)

One of the things that surprised you about him was how soft his hair was. You’d gotten a touch of it before you were Blade’s partner, and it was nice. Silky, managed, and most of all, beautiful.

You expressed it to him, once, and he fixed you with a firm stare. Only then, when Kafka told you of his origins, did you understand. (It was innocent, however. Blade could not fault you once for it.)

“Did you use my shampoo?” The strands fall perfectly into place, dividing like a glimmering waterfall under the bristles. You press your nose to his shoulder, enamored, “Wow. You even used my soap, too.”

Something akin to an amused huff leaves him. “You choose your products wisely.”

“Do I?” You’re grinning. “Well, that settles it. We’ll both be smelling like each other.”

(In the mirror, there is a quirk of a smile curling his lips; so faint that even you miss it. But it does not matter. Because to him, your smiles are enough to replace his own.)

With each brush of his hair, you fill in the space of quiet Blade leaves you to occupy. You talk about everything; to how lucky he is that he’s got a partner that would brush his hair like this, to how his hand should hurry up and heal for him to play with Silver Wolf, to how he should allow you and Kafka to spend time together—to which he frowns at—to how you think you’re seeing wrinkles on your face, and a few white hairs spurting out.

“I think you should pluck them out today. What do you think?”

Blade is quiet. Too quiet, perhaps. You discard the brush on the vanity, glancing at the mirror—

"You will be the first to have hair turned white," Blade suddenly speaks. "I will follow second."

You ask, "Would you still be here by then?"

He turns, moving his hair from your hands, and fixes you with a smoldering gaze. Blade doesn't need to answer, you think. The curse will force him to live longer than you will, and that knowledge burns at the back of your mind, but you want to humor yourself despite knowing your lover will roam the earth until eternity.

"I will be," Blade's reply comes unexpected. "I expect to be the one to see you off."

Is this panic you're feeling, or comfort? Panic in him setting aside his desire to die for you, for your presence in his life, for the respite that you bring? Or comfort in knowing he'll live until then, until your body decides to become one with the soil, until you say your last I love you?

It's becoming hard to speak, pressing yourself up to his side; arms wound tight around him. "Like some pretty grim reaper,“ You force out, teeth gritted. ”That sounds so ironic.“

“It is an act of love,” Blade defends. “Don’t misunderstand.”

How could you not, when you are always faced with the fact that your lover will never meet their end?

[fandomrose]

Blade- Scars of love.

Hello- this is a Blade 'what I think he'd be like in a relationship with a non-immortal.' Or rather a scenario I just dreamt up one day.

I tried to make his character as believable to Canon as possible, but, well its Blade and he's a bit 'not suited to a relationship.'

I do think he is alot different than alot of popular portrails of him. Alot calmer most of the time. Alot more caring but also not outwardly. Very much a ride or die (lol) man. And very dramatic. (We love)

There are warnings because.. Blade.

So content warnings for: angst, talks of life and death, blood, injuries, scarring.

Enjoy 💙

-------------------------------------------------------

Today started like any other. You and your partner Blade had just finished a sparring session and had showered together to clean off. It was a nice time, the two of you bonded through battle and a mostly innocent, yet intimate bathing time. 

Like any other day you and Blade lay in bed completely naked as you trace his scars softly. The two of you were very comfortable with each other's bodies at this point, Blade never saw any point in being squeamish over nudity and that eventually rubbed off on you. His eyes are closed and his breathing even, if you didn't know his body so well you would think him asleep. You were jolted out of your reverence of his scars by his voice softly calling out to you though his eyes remain comfortably closed.

"What is your fascination with my scars? Do you not find them unsightly?" His voice was rough as always, but there was a softer quality to it than usual even if he was still intense.

"Hmm, no. On one hand its sad that you've been hurt so much but, I like your scars, they are attractive." You kept tracing them as if trying to prove your point. 

"Good, you are strange from what I understand, but good it's good you like them..."

You wondered what had gotten into him this evening, he never asked anything like this before. Even if he tried to seem blasé, he definitely had something 'scar related' on his mind.

"Of course I like them, they are a part of you. Also you'd be surprised, there are quite a few people that find scars attractive."

He didn't answer but you noticed that his breathing got slightly heavier. 

"I want to ask you something.." You were once again startled by his voice. He sounded a lot more intense and slightly hesitant. 

You looked up at him jolting slightly when you saw his eyes open and stare you down.

"Of course Blade what do you want to ask me?" His intensity was slightly alarming, clearly whatever he was thinking was deeply important to him.

"... I would like you to contribute to the scars you enjoy so much..."

"What? Blade, what do you mean?" You think you understand but surely he can't be actually asking you to injure him.

"I mean I want you to cut into me deeply, scar me, leave an everlasting mark on my body." He said it so simply, albeit incredibly intensely. He'd clearly been thinking of it for a while.

You were shocked speechless and his request brought up the insecurities of your relationship. You are mortal, he is not. He had sworn off love after being betrayed by his best friends, he couldn't even fathom a romance before you. But you are mortal, and you will leave him behind one day unless he finds a way to die sooner. Elio claims he can't see the future you and Blade will share so you are both taking a shot in the dark with this relationship.

Blade was still staring at you waiting for your response. He wasn't a fool, I knew this would be a big deal for you. Hurting Blade was out of the question in your mind, you hated him getting hurt let alone you being the one to hurt him. So he knew to let you wait to make a decision he would wait for you.

After a short while of deliberation you eventually decide to say... "yes, okay, I will scar you, but-" You put your finger up getting his attention for your terms. "I want us to prepare properly, towels, a med kit, sterile equipment. Even if it won't kill you I won't have you getting an infection." 

"I want you to use the knife I made for you" was his only response. You sigh deeply. 

"That's not safe Blade..." He raised his eyebrow and looked at you blankly. 

"I'll be fine, you know that."

You sigh again, going silent to think before you nod. "Yes you'll be fine I know I just.. i don't want to hurt you unnecessarily. Obviously there will be pain I mean you want me to cut into you so deeply it scars for a long time-"

During your worried ramble blade sits up and covers your mouth with his large hand. "Enough, I, will, be, fine. I know you care about my wellbeing but I will be fine. I want this. You- will leave me one day and I want something to remember you by, marked on this wretched body. Though I would rather die by your side." 

He had never verbally acknowledged the reality the two of you face and neither had you, preferring to leave it hanging above you both like a guillotine. You feel sharp, hot tears prick your eyes, blinking rapidly to be rid of them.

"Don't cry, it is merely reality" He said simply as if he didn't have a care in the world. He did though, he cared and you knew it. He wouldn't have requested to be carved into by you if he didn't. It was such a bittersweet request and it touched you to know he cared but your very soul ached at the reason. 

Blade twisted his hand to wipe the couple of tears that dropped from your eyes. Sniffling, you regain the courage to speak.

"I know it's reality, it doesn't make it hurt less. I really love you, you know. I can't fathom leaving you alone in this vast universe." You lean your head into his hand and breath deeply before continuing. "I will do it, I will scar you with the knife you made for me... what would you even want me to scar into you? Have you thought about it?"

"I have, I want it to be simple but memorable, not something that can be easily replicated by a random injury and something that wouldn't take you too long to do.... I couldn't think of something specific though, do you have anything that fits that description?"

He really did think of nearly everything, even going so far to think of your own comfort. Something did come to mind though, something that did fit the description and symbolised you fairly well. You retrieve the knife he made you and look at the carvings, one was an intricate symbol of love from the xianzhou and the other was a simple four-pointed star. A representative of you and the way you met. Under a large four-pointed star that was suspended in chains, hanging above you in the world of your birth. That same four-pointed star would be your symbol of existence from birth to after death.

"I have an idea blade." He saw you looking at your knife and nodded a rare soft, almost imperceivable smile on his face.

"Alright, let's get set up then.." blade rose from his place on the bed and retrieved a med kit and some black towels. You could feel your heart beating faster with nerves as you watch him move through the room retrieving the necessary items and laying them out on the bed.

"Here we go. ... is everything okay? Do you still want to do this?"

"Yes, I'm just nervous, what if I make it badly, or ugly." 

Blade frowned and you couldn't help but think you said something wrong.

"The purpose of the scar is to remember you by not be pretty"

"Right, yes I know I can't help but worry." 

Blade just nodded and layed down taking deep breaths as he prepared himself mentally. 

"I'm ready when you are... the scar is to go over my heart. Just to clarify."

You nod and move to straddle his lap sitting on his stomach being in the position to cut into his chest. 

Blade looked relaxed beneath you, his arms were underneath his head and his eyes were closed. He was awake just more relaxed than you feel he had the right to be considering your own anxiety about what you were about to do.

[sweetestpopcorn]

Honestly, I can't forget how much that part of the fandom wants for Rhaenyra's importance in Daemon's life to be reduced. I remember I stumbled upon a post and it literally said "She wasn't that important to him anyway, all we know of their relationship is that she was his niece, his wife and they had two kids together", which left me completely ???? It made me wonder if they took the informations regarding Rhaenyra from the TV tropes site, where they spent paragraphs on Laena and Nettles, but a single line for Rhaenyra.

So - just for a short recap - Rhaenyra was his niece, the first woman he ever asked to marry, the wife he always wanted and choose for himself, mother to three of his children (because hello baby Visenya), his Queen, but to these people she was what? An inconvenience to be pushed aside? Like, I already knew she was hated and people wanted for her to be unloved/unwanted/undesired, but some of these takes really cross a certain line sometimes. It's very strange.

Hi there Anon 🤗

Once again sorry for this huge delay.

Ok so I just have to say how much I love the ""She wasn't that important to him anyway" followed by "all we know of their relationship is that she was his niece, his wife and they had two kids together".

Hum...

Just imagine this situation:

"Hi Paul!"

"Oh, who's this lady here with you?"

"Oh no one especial really, she's my wife of ten years with whom I have two kids with and who I met since she was born. No big deal."

Ok then, so if being from the same family, being married, and having children together is like no big deal and nothing important, can I ask wtf is?

Also this is a complete lie since we know about Rhaenyra and Daemon's relationship with much more details than ANY of his other relationships across all stages of Rhaenyra's life: when she was a child, when she was a teenager, when she was a young woman, and then a grown woman. So if we know nothing about Daemon and Rhaenyra's relationship which spans across all of the Dance, can I be as bold as to ask what great information we have on his other relationships? Ah yes a couple of lines. 'Mazing.

Like once again, write all of the fanfiction you want, have all your "headcanons", but keep it real right now and don't make yourselves seem like you need some medication by pretending Daemyra aren't the main relationship of the Dance and the main characters.

And if I can add for all the confused besties, Daemon's character was specifically created for Rhaenyra. She has existed since GOT, him we have only evidence of having been created post "A Dance with Dragons". There was a Targaryen male we knew she married to have Aegon but he was literally "Targaryen Husband" and nothing else. He was very recently created.

What more do you need? Because I'm a doctor but I cannot prescribe medication.

Regarding any website the only legitimate one concerning the canon asoiaf universe is awoiaf.westeros.org run by Elio and Linda. Yes, it's not perfect, has some missing information (not a lot) and some aspects that need updating and have minor errors, however it is the most completed and accurate one and the only one I would advise anyone to go for regarding information from asoiaf, all others seem to be run either by G*T universe fanboys and girls and by people who lost their way to AO3 and somehow ended up writing a wiki for their imaginary fanfictions.

Oh, Anon, have no doubt that many lines have been crossed when the subject is Rhaenyra and I have seen almost all. The same people calling Rhaegar a pedo🐻 and feeling so sorry for Lyanna being dead silent about Rhaenyra and Daemon and blaming Rhaenyra for seducing Criston - these are canon fans btw, not redacted and this was many years before redacted - people writing about Daemon ab_sing and r__ing Rhaenyra while telling her how the LoVe Of HiS LiFe was Laena, people legit calling her a wh0re, fat, disgusting etc... list goes on and on and on.

I would be shocked but this fandom has taught me better and can we really expect anything from a fandom who calls DANY - I repeated DANY - a r__ist, slaver, racist, etc etc, writing entire f_cking metas about how she's worse than Joffrey? Like the bar is BELLOW the titanic and every sh:t show Hb:tchO puts out there will only lower it.

All the best to you, say no to websites run by people who lost their way over to fanfiction.net and AO3, and yes to the ONLY legitimate asoiaf website.

Also when you talk nonsense and you know a story by fanfiction and metas, stop it and get the books. And maybe some medication. There's support available.

Popcorn out!

PS: This is NOT about redacted. Keep Ryan's fanfiction out of canon discussions.

[purplecritter]

Dragon Age: Vows and Vengeance (Ep. 7)

Official episode transcript here

My notes while I was listening under the cut… Spoilers ahead!

I am always so uncomfortable with these types of “surgery” scenes. Could never be a combat medic

So they plan to pack the wound with a “poultice of mud, moss, and herbs”... DAO Warden drinking health poultices is cringing right now :’)

The dramatic thunders are paid actors

Ngl “Blood of the Black Rot” sounds like Blight. Taint if you will. Plus there’s no cure, and darkspawn blood isn’t like oil but it does look quite viscous idk

Okay merchant Ramiro (adds to the notebook of “characters to look out for in Veilguard)

Aww I like Lillemar

I did not anticipate Emmrich having company other than Manfred so this Rolet is a surprise idk why

Okay Emmrich is OPTIMISTIC we love a man that trusts in nature (Nature will absolutely destroy those horses sorry dude)

Mkayyy so a fortnight = two weeks, to get from Antiva past the whole Free Marcher to (near) Hunter Fell (between Nevarra, Tevinter and Orlais basically). Good to know!

The way Emmrich talks is satisfying? Does that make sense? Pleasant voice!

Oooh I wonder if Manfred is a literal spirit of Curiosity or if that was more of a figure of speech. [Spoilers for Tevinter Nights] In “Down Among the Dead Men” Audric is a spirit of curiosity but I don’t recall any other case where we closely interacted with one of this kind, it’d be neat if Manfred was one even silent as he is!

Earthquake mention 🎉

Emmrich what do you mean “by jove”?! Who is Jove here💀

“I don't mean to sound dire, but best you search your heart for something to believe in” okay foreshadowing I see you

Manfred disliking being given nicknames was not on my bingo card but I like it. Number 1 nemesis of Varric’s as soon as they meet

I don’t know why Rolet was with Emmrich and at this point I’m too late to ask

“Things have gotten strange in the lower crypts ever since the incident in the Silent Plains [...] There was quite an explosion in a cave a few weeks back. Its effects have reverberated throughout the area, compromising bits of the Veil” 👀

why do the lineages always have to be patriarchal

Yeah not there’s no way this “Pascal De La Forsa” guy isn’t a vampire or something. His vibes are rancid, as they say

“Almost sounds like the Fade out there, no?” better hope Nadia can learn the Warden’s way of closing Fade rifts by waving their weapon around because I have a feeling it’s not going to stay “almost” for much longer

“Oh no, personally, no. Just the tales I've heard. I imagine it's similar. I'm really just thinking out loud.” this was Solas every time you asked him about things he shouldn’t have known lmao

OOf the sister is even less subtle about not being human 

“Perhaps a little spirit is just what you need” uh huh I see what you did there

“Spirit fire of midnight suns, through my spire of ill and ire, the wretched blood he blessed, not mired” ← Emmric’s incantation to heal Drayden

“Cetus bile” blegh. Anyways Cetus is (drum roll please) a sea dragon! Wonder if they’ll get a spotlight in Veilguard 👀

Demon to Nadia: “Now I see why he wants you” cool cocol cool so either Elio got a reputation since getting possessed or he’s not talking about Elio here? 

^ Maeror apparently. 

“O-NAY, AH-TAY. O-NAY, AH-TAY. SCAH-TOE, TOW-BRAY” ← chanted by demon to open Fade rift

NAAAH THE RING WAS WITH THE TEMPLAR DEMON!! Nadiaaa get awayyy

Yeah much as I hoped in the first couple episodes that Elio could be saved. I don’t think that’s likely at all anymore lol

[warmaidensrevenge]

Always seen you

Pairing: Eddie x Insecure! plus size reader x Friend!Elio x Billy Hargrove

If you want to read my other work you can find it HERE

A/N: Hey buds. This is the next part to my Always seen you series. This one has another character. Billy will be introduced in this part. Just a heads up. I want Billy to be like the very confident version of himself. But totally not the racist version of him. So I am going to use a kinder Billy in this. Hope you like it. As always feedback is greatly appreciated. And comments and asks are always welcome. Kay love you bye.

Warnings: 18+ language, fluff, angst, alcohol use, slight bullying, body insecurities,  jealousy, arguing, mention of unprotected sex, smutish, slow burn and not proof read and no word count.

Summary: You finally got your guy. But something always gets in the way. Does true love conquer all?

Part 17

💔💔

The following morning you woke up and Eddie was gone. Last night was something you never experienced before. One, you saw Eddie drunk out of his mind. Two, you found out he was depressed because you guys were apart again. Three, you had unprotected sex.

Though it was absolutely beautiful, you were scared. You and Eddie were too young to have children. Maybe it would be different if you guys lived in the same state. But you didn't and you were working on your future. So was Eddie. You guys were living completely separate lives. Yes you were still dating and hoped that when everything was said and done, you would finally be together how you planned. However, this wasn't a direction you wanted to go in right now.

Last night was not necessarily a mistake. But a stupid decision. You would never regret being with Eddie in that way. But you could beat yourself up for not thinking.

You got up and got dressed. You were gonna wait to ask Eddie to take you to the clinic until he came into the room. 

He had a small brown paper bag in hand and a beautiful smile. He always made you flustered when he looked at you like that.

" Morning Angel."

" Morning." 

He came and sat with you. You could tell he was a bit tense.

" How did you sleep?" You asked.

He put an arm around you. " Good. I got to hold you. So it was good."

You smiled and put your head on his shoulder.

" Not hungover?"

He kissed the top of your head. " Nah. My girl took very good care of me."

You guys sat quietly for a minute before Eddie cleared his throat.

" So uhh…I went to the pharmacy and picked up the morning after pill. If…if you want to take it."

You looked up at him. "I was just about to ask you to take me to the clinic."

" Yeah?"

" Yeah. I ummm…we're not-"

" Ready?"

You nodded. 

Eddie kissed your forehead. " Yeah. It's umm too soon for that. And I'm sorry that I didn't put on a rubber."

" Don't be. Last night was on both of us. But umm I have a confession." You put your head back on his shoulder and looked at the ground. " I…I liked it."

" Liked what?"

You hesitated for a moment. " When…when you came in me."

Eddie smirked. " Is that right?"

" Y-yes. I hope that's not weird."

" No it's not weird. Truthfully, I was always scared to do that. But, it felt like we were closer than ever before."

" It did." 

You grabbed the paper bag and pulled out the pill. Eddie grabbed the cup of water you brought in last night. 

After you swallowed the pill you sat there looking down at the glass. You guys needed to have a conversation. A very serious one at that.

Eddie knew this too. When he left earlier, all he could think about was not wanting to leave for 3 months. Even though this was always his dream. To have the world hear his music. He didn't want it if it meant he had to be away from you so often.

"Can I ask you a question y/n?"

You looked at him. Your name sounded so strange coming out of his mouth.

" Sure."

" How-how did you do this? How did you take me leaving so well?"

" I…I didn't."

" What happened?"

You took a breath. " At first it was okay. Because I didn't get to say goodbye. If you would have woken me up, I would have begged you to stay or asked for you to take me with you. But the next day my heart felt like it was falling. And it just got worse. I stopped eating and I quit all my clubs. I just laid in bed most of the time. I tried not to let it show how badly I missed you. But then on New Year's your uncle said some stuff to me that I really needed to hear.

" What did he say?"

You shifted a little, moving closer to him." He said that relationships require a lot of work. That it's gonna be hard sometimes. But as long as we communicate, everything will be fine."

Eddie sat there holding you tighter. How was he going to ask you to move to California? How was he going to tell you he didn't want to be apart anymore?

" Eddie, I don't like being apart either. Being without you feels like a part of me is missing you know. But, we had plans for ourselves before we got together…I think that as much as we care about each other, we have to focus on what we're doing. To pass the time between visits."

" I…I don't want…" 

He tried to say he didn't want visits anymore. He wanted to say for you to just come with him. But he couldn't. He couldn't ask you to put your dreams on hold for him. So he diverted.

" I ummm been drinking a lot. And I don't want to anymore."

You nodded and moved so that you could look him in the face. " Eddie, are you drinking because of me?"

He looked away not wanting to tell you the truth.

" Eds, please talk to me. I know our relationship isn't easy. But remember it's not us versus each other. I'm your partner. It's us versus the problem…Wayne told me that."

Eddie swallowed gently. " You know I drank sometimes. But now with all this work, and not being able to be with you has been a lot you know."

You grabbed his hand and continued to listen.

" It's not really a big deal…it's just…you know my dad was an alcoholic."

You nodded.

" I…I don't want to end up like him. I don't want to mess up what we have or get distracted when it comes to my music."

You cupped his face to make him look at you. 

" Love, it's okay. I know that all of this is overwhelming. And I get it. But you won't be like him…I won't let you. You're strong Eddie. Even just talking about this is a step in the right direction. It's okay to have a drink every once in a while to relax. But, last night…even though you were being very cute. It scared me seeing you like that. This lifestyle has a lot of influences that can be very hard to ignore. But I know that you can do this. We can find help if that's what you want. It's always better to have a plan. Just so that if it gets bad. You can stop it."

Eddie put his hand over yours. You would never know how much this meant to him. He was afraid for the longest time he would live up to the Munson name. But knowing you were gonna be there to help him. Meant the world to him.

" Ed's, I'm here for you. No matter where I am or what I'm doing. I'm just a phone call away."

" Thank you y/n. You don't know what that means to me."

You gave him a warm hug. 

" I love you Eddie. And all I want is for you to be okay."

Eddie could have cried. Never in his life did he think he would find someone who actually cared for him like you did.

After a minute or so you stood up.

" Are you willing to come to the clinic with me? I ummm I want to see about some birth control. And maybe we can talk to the doctor about any recommendations for you."

Eddie stood up. " Yeah. Okay. But umm birth control? You don't have to do that. I know last night got out of control-"

You moved to him and put your fingers on his lips. " Ed's, last night was amazing. And I want to do it like that from now on if that's okay with you. But we have to be responsible about it."

You removed your fingers so he could talk.

" Are-are you sure?" 

" Only if you're ok with it."

" No-no. I'm definitely okay with it. I love doing that. I've never done it before. And it felt so good…you felt good."

You looked away and blushed. Making Eddie smile.

" You felt good too Eds."

…

Over the next few days. You and Eddie got back to your roots. You guys didn't leave the confines of his room for pretty much anything. You guys didn't have sex. It was just a huge cuddle fest of kissing and holding onto one another. Talking like you used to and watching movies. 

The doctor suggested that Eddie start going to AA meetings. Just to see and listen to others that have struggled with alcoholism. You went with him to show your support. But as soon as the meetings were over you both just went back to his bed.

The last day came and you helped Eddie pack. It actually wasn't that bad like the first time you did this. There was still so much to say but yet you guys just stood quiet and smiled at each other.

Eddie wanted to take you out to dinner so you got dolled up. 

Instead of going out to a fancy meal you just grabbed some dogs from a vendor and went for a walk. While you ate you heard music coming from a bar. You smiled when you heard the song. Eddie grabbed your hot dog and pop and set it down. 

" Dance with me." 

You took his hand and started swaying to the music.

" You look so beautiful Angel."

" No you."

Eddie grinned pulling you closer and started singing.

🎵

So caught up in you, little girl

You're the one that's got me down on my knees

So caught up in you, little girl

That I never want to get myself free

🎵

When the song was over Eddie tucked your hair behind your ear. 

" Thank you for coming. I…I don't know what I would do without you."

" Well you won't ever have to worry about that…I'm here to stay. You got me Ed's. I'm your girl. Always."

When you guys got back to his apartment Eddie lit candles and turned on his radio. You were in bed already completely naked.

You held the sheet up to your chest and motioned him to lay down. 

When he got in you started to kiss. Eddie's hands mapped over your body. He pulled you on his lap and kissed all over your chest and neck. 

" Ed's?"

" Hmmm?"

" I have to tell you something."

You looked deep into his eyes.

"I feel like everything in my life has led me to you…all my choices and all the hurt. Everything. And when I'm with you it's like magic. When we're together all that pain seems worth it. Because if I did one thing different I would have never found it in me to talk to you. You are absolutely my favorite person in the whole world. You're the only one I truly trust with my heart. So I want to thank you. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for choosing me. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being my home."

Eddie hugged you and moved so that he could lay you down. He caressed your cheek and stroked your hair.

"Angel, I…I may not find the right words to tell you what you mean to me. But…I will spend the rest of my life searching for them. I love you. With everything in me."

You gave him a sweet smile before you kissed him. 

This was what Eddie always wanted. Being with someone who was meant for him. As he made love to you. All those bad thoughts went away. When he was with you, he was on top of the world.

…

When you went back to school a sense of joy filled you. Though you missed Eddie like crazy. You were happy with how you guys left things. There was no crying this time. Only I love yous. And pinky promises to see each other soon.

Once the school was in sight you smiled. It was time to get to work. 

You went to your room and checked your voicemail. You had gotten a call from Matthew to see if you made it back okay. And then the next one was Eddie. As soon as he started talking, your roommate came in.

" Back from your vacation I see."

" It wasn't a vacation." You said stopping the tape.

" Yeah okay. Words out that you went to see your "boyfriend". It must be nice to leave school whenever you like.

You looked at her.

What the hell is your problem? 

You crossed your arms. " Did I do something to offend you?" 

She scoffed. " No. Not at all."

That was the most sarcastic response you had ever heard.

" Seriously? You've been a complete asshole to me since I came here. "

The girl laughed. " Well I'm sorry. I just don't like you. I don't like how people can just get into this school, just because they have money. It must be nice being able to do whatever you want with daddy's money."

You furrowed your brow. " What are you talking about? You think I'm rich?"

" Please. You come here wearing all the latest fashion, and with all that jewelry. You stay out almost every night and what? Party? Which I don't get. You're always on the phone talking to whoever. And you just leave in the middle of the semester to go and fuck your so called boyfriend."

" What I do outside of school is none of your business. And for your information I'm not rich. I got into school based on merit. If I had money, do you really think I would be living in a dorm? No! And I don't go out every night. I have a job. To help pay for the stuff I need. And all the things I have were a gift from my boyfriend. And yes I ameon the phone when I can because I miss my family and I miss my boyfriend. So is there anything else you like to assume about me?"

She smirked. " You're a good liar, chubs."

" Screw you. Believe me or don't. I don't care."

You grabbed your purse and took off. 

The nerve of some people.

You stormed off wanting nothing more than to go home. You were already exhausted from flying and worried about Eddie. 

You went straight to Elio's dorm.

" Hey. Welcome back. Come in."

You entered his room." Hey E."

You looked around and were surprised by how neat he was. He went to grab a notebook and handed it to you.

" This has everything you missed. So…how was the visit?"

You sighed. " Thanks. Umm it was good. For the most part."

" Oh no. Come here."

Elio patted the side next to him on his bed.

" What happened?"

While sitting next to him you spoke.

" Nothing Eddie and I couldn't handle."

" But was it a good visit?"

" Yes. A very much needed one…thank you by the way. You don't know how much it meant to me that you helped."

He shoulder bumped you. " That's what friends are for."

You laughed.

" So what are we doing today?" Elio said standing up and putting on his jacket.

" Well right now I want to nap. But my roommate is there. And she honestly is a nightmare."

" Yeah? Well sleep here. I have to go to the library for a bit. And when you get up we can get food."

" What about your roommate?"

" Oh that guy is joining a fraternity. He never sleeps here anymore. So come Monday I will have all this room to myself."

You yawned. " That's nice."

Elio grabbed his bag. " Get some sleep. I'll wake you in a few hours."

" Okay."

Before he left you called out while laying down on his bed.

" E, thanks again."

He gave you a warm smile. " You're welcome. Oh and don't open the door for strangers."

You giggled and nodded.

3 hours later Elio turned on the light making you squeal. 

" Ahhhhh!"

" Wake up, pretty lady! I'm starving." Elio said, jumping on the bed.

You turned your back towards him " Ohhh common, five more minutes."

" Nope. Get up." He smacked your tush and climbed off the bed.

" I'm in the mood for Italian." 

You groaned and sat up.

" Italian huh?"

" Yup. Let's go."

"Ugh. I have to go back to my room and change."

" Well come on. Let's go."

You groaned again and started for your dorm.

When you and Elio got to the door you prayed your roommate was gone. 

When you got into the room you sighed in relief.

" Okay just give me 3 minutes."

Elio sat on your bed and waited. 

" Hey E." You called out from the bathroom.

" Yeah?"

" I brought you back something. It's in my bag on the bed."

Elio smiled and turned to grab the bag. He pulled out a button up baby blue shirt with flamingos all over. He absolutely loved it.

He quickly took off his shirt and took off the tags when someone came in. 

Your roommate stood there in the doorway with a shit eating grin on her face.

" So do you like it?" You asked coming out in your bra.

" Wow! And you get around too huh?"

Your eyes widened seeing her standing there with her hands on her hips. You immediately covered yourself.

" It's not-" Elio tried to say. But she held up her hand.

" I don't get it. You're hot. Why the hell are you with her? And I thought you had a boyfriend?"

" I-I do it's not-"

The phone rang, cutting you off.

Your roommate dashed for it. 

" Hello?...oh yeah she's here. But umm she's kinda naked with a guy right now."

Your soul left your body. 

" Yeah. Okay. Bye."

She hung up the phone and shook her head. " That was Eddie. He seemed pissed. She grabbed her books and left.

You didn't know what to do. So you just sank down to the floor. 

" Hey." Elio came to you. " No, it's going to be okay."

" E-eddie."

" It's okay. We'll talk to him."

…

When your roommate said that at first Eddie thought it was a joke. But when he heard you gasp he got pissed. How could you do this to him?

He wanted to go and get drunk immediately. But then the phone rang. He didn't want to answer. But he needed to know what your excuse was. 

" Eddie please. She's lying."

" So there's not a naked guy in your room right now?

" No Eds. It's just Elio. I was getting changed so we can get food. That's all. I swear."

" Then why would your roommate say that?"

" She hates me. She thinks I got in because I have money."

" Why would she think that?"

You didn't want to tell him about the stuff he bought you. And you also didn't want to tell him that Elio was gay. Because it wasn't your secret to tell.

" She thinks that because I went to visit you. And because of all the gifts I have."

Eddie wanted to believe you. And at the end of the conversation he convinced himself that you would never do that. But he still had this doubt. 

 When you hung up you didn't feel better after the conversation. Elio sat next to you and held your hand.

" You should move in with me."

You looked at him. " W-what?"

" Yeah. Your roommate is a liar and I don't think you should live with her anymore."

" I-I. I don't think that's such a good idea. Eddie won't like it."

"If he really cares about you. He wouldn't want you staying with someone like that. She's not a nice person."

You looked down at your hands. " I just don't want him to think anything about us."

" Did you tell him about me? That he doesn't have to worry about that."

" N-no. That's your business."

" You can tell him."

" I didn't think you wanted anyone to know."

" I don't. But I don't want us being friends to cause problems."

You nodded. 

" But tell him later. And let me take you to dinner."

" Yeah. Okay."

You had thought you guys were going to a restaurant. But when you pulled up to a house you were confused.

" So ummm my parents don't know I'm gay."

" Umm okay."

" I know it's a lot to ask. But uhh if they ask. Could you just play along?"

" Ask what?"

Elio hesitated. " If…if we're together."

You raised your brows. " Umm yeah. But we don't have to kiss or anything right?"

"God no! You're pretty and all. But uhh I might vomit."

" Geez. Thanks."

Elio laughed. " Common. My birth giver made pasta."

You laughed too and hopped out the van. 

Dinner was nice. Elio's parents were really kind. You learned that they were Italian. And that they normally summered in Italy. But this year elio started college. So they stayed. You were glad they didn't ask you if you were his girlfriend. For some reason you knew Eddie wouldn't like that. 

The whole time your mind kept going to him. You didn't know how to bring up that you didn't want to live in that dorm anymore. Or how to approach living with Elio. Sure you and Elio were very new friends. But something about him made you trust him. Shit he brought you to meet his parents already. However, Eddie's feelings were very important to you. And you didn't know how he would take it if you said you wanted to move in with Elio. 

So you decided to wait until you talked to him again.

…

A few weeks went by and Eddie hadn't called. You called him but he was always too busy to talk. You wanted to wait to move in until you had the discussion. But after the thing with your roommate, she was calling you a whore under her breath. And she continued making fun of you. So you moved. Hoping that Eddie would finally get back to you. But he didn't.

One day the van was making funny noises so you decided to take it to a mechanic. Elio was busy with swim practice so you went alone. When you pulled up to the garage there was this blonde haired guy standing outside smoking. You felt the guys eyes on you while you passed. You gave him a small smile before going inside. 

After a few minutes he came in and went behind the counter. The guy you were working with started talking to him.

" Billy, this young lady needs you to check out her vehicle. She said there's a little rattling going on. She also wants the oil changed and fluids topped."

Billy's eyes never left you. You felt so anxious that you couldn't meet his gaze. 

Billy smiled seeing you blush. " Yeah I'll take good care of her."

You looked up and he nudged his head for you to follow him. 

" Could you pull in? I want to hear what you're talking about."

You nodded and brought the van in.

Billy got closer to the front end and listened. 

" Okay you can turn it off." He said.

You did so and got off. Billy lifted the hood and looked over the engine.

" This might take a whilem" he said, not looking at you.

" Oh-okay…umm is there somewhere I can wait?"

He pointed at the corner. " Yeah. There's a table right over there."

" Thank you."

Just before you walked away the guy said something that caught you by surprise.

" You're welcome sweets."

You laughed nervously and went to sit. You actually wanted to watch him work so if it ever happens again that maybe you could fix it. But you had a lot of work to do. So you pulled out your stuff and started on your reading.

You kept feeling Billy's eyes on you. Which made you uncomfortable. And it was really hot that day. So you took off your cardigan and sat there in your university shirt and shorts.

Billy noticed you were hot so he moved the fan that was on him and pointed it towards you. You looked at him and smiled. 

To Billy that was the most beautiful smile he had ever seen. You were a very beautiful curvy girl. And he thought it was cool that you drove a rickety old van. 

About half an hour passed and Billy was sweating through his shirt. So without really thinking he took it off and shook his hair. 

You made the mistake of looking up when he did that. Your palms started to sweat. And you had to look away. He was annoyingly attractive. Kinda reminded you of Eddie.

Eddie.

You looked away ashamed of yourself for thinking that. No one was like Eddie. 

Your mind started to wonder. What was Eddie doing that he couldn't call you back? Was he still upset about the whole Elio thing? After the conversation the other phone calls started off awkward. But it always ended with I love yous and I miss yous. 

Which made you feel better about the whole situation. However, Eddie was missing way too many dates and you started to worry. 

Billy cleared his throat bringing your attention to him. When you looked up he was grinning. 

" So umm I changed out your spark plugs. That was what was causing the noise. And all your fluids were topped off. Oil looked almost new. So I didn't change it. No reason to do that when you still have about 3,000 miles to go."

" Oh. Umm okay."

" But I do recommend you get new tires. Those bad boys are practically bald."

" O-oh. Umm sure. Can I get those today?"

Billy wiped his face with a towel. " I'm sorry sweets. We don't carry that size here. But I can definitely order them for you."

" Yeah…okay… umm how much do you think it would cost?"

He sat down across from you.

" Well with four tires and labor it cost about 200."

" And the cost for today's work?"

" Four sparks plugs plus Labor is about 100."

You looked in your wallet and only had 150.

" I can pay you for the work today. But I can't give you the rest until I get paid on Friday."

" That's okay. I'll order the tires and you can pay me when you can."

" Are-are you sure?"

He gave you a smile and nod.

" Umm that's really nice of you."

" Don't worry about it."

There was a moment of silence before it felt weird.

" So is it safe to drive?" You asked, looking at Eddie's van.

" Yeah. You should be fine for a little bit. Just don't drive when it rains. You will definitely slide when you break."

" Okay. Umm here you go."

You held out the money for him and for a brief second your hands touched. You quickly pulled away. 

He smirked. " I'm Billy by the way."

" I'm uhh y/n."

He chuckled. "Not sure of your name?"

"N-no."

" So you go to school around here?"

" Y-yeah."

Billy laughed again. " Really shy aren't you sweets?"

You stood up and gathered your things." Haha ummm. I better go."

Billy stood up too. " So can I call you?"

Your eyes widened and the first thing you thought was a hard NO. But then you relaxed when he said why.

" For the tires."

" Oh…y-yeah."

You wrote down your number on his carbon copy of your receipt.

" I'll call you as soon as they come in." He said with a gorgeous smile.

All you could do was nod. Sure you found guys attractive and all. But the way he looked at you was weird. Like how Eddie looked at you. And that didn't feel too good coming from someone else. 

You drove back to the dorm and Elio was outside smoking.

" Hey E." 

" Hey pretty lady. How's the beast?"

You laughed at his nickname for the van." He's good. Needs a new shoes."

" Cool. Have you talked to Eddie today?"

You shook your head.

" What the hell man?!"

" He's busy."

" Yeah but at least he can check up on you."

" He knows I'm fine. I just wish I knew if he was okay."

" I'm sure he's good. But are you okay with not talking to him?"

" You know I'm not. But what can I do? He's a musician. And he's on tour."

Elio frowned. He didn't know Eddie. But he felt like at the very least he should call. Elio could see how everyday that went by your heart broke a little every time you looked at the voicemail and it had been nothing there. 

" Y/n. I don't mean to be putting my nose in your business. But Hun you're sad. I know you are. You try to hide it. But you're not very good at it."

" I know. I've never been good at covering up my hurt."

" I think you should call him and talk about what's bothering you."

" I want to talk to him about it. But he doesn't call me back…I have a feeling that something's going on with Ava."

" No Hun. The way you talk about Eddie. He doesn't seem like the type of person who would do that."

" I know. It's not him I don't trust. It's her."

Elio grabbed your hand " Common. Let's go try him"

…

The phone trilled a few times before you heard him. There was a lot going on in his side. That you could barely hear him.

" H-hello."

" Ed's? Can you hear me?"

" A-angel?"

"Ed's?"

" Hold on baby. I can't hear you."

" You sat there fidgeting with the loose strings on the bottom of your shorts. 

You heard some rustling then quiet.

" Angel? God I miss you."

You smiled a little. " Miss you too Eds…where have you been?"

' I know, baby. I'm so sorry. Please. Please forgive me. It's just been so hectic. That I barely even sleep anymore."

You were quiet for a few seconds.

" Angel?"

"Eds. I need to talk to you."

" Umm okay. Can I call you tonight? I have this interview in a few minutes."

" Eds it's-"

" Yeah I'm coming." You heard Eddie talking to someone else. " Baby I gotta go. But I promise. I will call you later. Love you."

"Love you too."

You hung up the phone and wanted to cry. Elio came over to your side of the room and hugged you.

As tears fell you hugged him back. 

" Why are you crying Hun?"

You let him go and wiped at your face. " I…I just really miss him."

Elio hugged you much tighter this time. " It's okay. Everything is going to be fine."

It was about midnight when Eddie called. Around the 1030 mark you had given up on waiting for him. So you cried yourself to sleep. Elio woke you up and handed you the phone.

" Angel?"

"E-Eds?"

 " Hi baby. I'm sorry it's late."

" Are you hanging out with your friend?"

" It's okay. Umm where are you right now?"

" In Colorado. Just checked into a hotel."

" Oh. Okay. Are you okay?"

" Yeah baby. I'm good. Miss you though."

"Miss you too."

There was this awkward silence before Eddie started talking.

" Umm not exactly."

" What do you mean?"

You sat up and sighed. While Elio sat by your feet.

" We umm we moved in together."

Eddie's loving tone changed immediately. " Uhhh. What?! When did that happen?"

" A couple of weeks ago."

" And you're just telling me now!?"

" Well I did try calling you. But you never called me back."

Eddie was quiet. That was true.

He sighed. " So you just moved in with the guy? Did you think I would be okay with that?"

" I…stuff happened with my roommate. And I just couldn't live there anymore."

" Okay. But you couldn't move into a room with another girl?"

" I wanted to live with Elio."

" Y/n. That's not okay."

" Eddie, Elio is just a friend. You have nothing to worry about."

Eddie was pissed. How did you not see moving in with a guy not make him worried?

"I'm not okay with you living with a guy."

" Well I'm not okay with not talking to you."

Eddie sighed again.

" Eddie. What's going on? Why haven't you called me?"

" I've been busy. So have you from the sounds of it."

You looked at Elio with tears filling your eyes again. 

Elio mouthed be strong.

" Eddie don't be that way."

" I'm sorry. It's just a lot to hear that my girlfriend is living with a guy."

"I know. And I really did try to talk to you about it. But Eddie, it doesn't feel like we're together anymore."

" What?! Y-yes. Yes we are."

" Then why doesn't it feel like it? You always call me. Did I do something wrong?"

" No. It's just this collab and tour."

" Is it that bad that you can't call me for just a minute? "

" Baby please. I know that this is hard right now. But we are together. And- and I miss you."

" I…just don't get it. How can you miss me and not try and talk to me? Because it kills me not talking to you. To not hear your voice for weeks. Weeks Eddie."

Eddie fought back his tears. He knew that not calling you back was going to hurt you. But he really was working a lot. And he was trying to get as much work done so that he could surprise visit you for your anniversary. But then time just got away from him.

" Angel. I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry."

You were quiet for a second. " Eddie, can I ask you a question?"

" You can ask me anything. You know that."

You thought for a second. " Am I still important to you?"

" Of course you are. Baby you are the most important person in my life. I think about you all day every day."

You were too quiet for Eddie's liking. He was pissed and hurt that you thought that. And to top it off you were living with Elio. Sure he believed you that you were going to tell him. But still, it hurt him that you found comfort in someone else.

" Y/n. Please hear me…you're so special to me. You're my reason to keep going. When I want to quit and go to you. I hear you telling me to keep going. Baby you are my everything. And if I could be with you right now. I would be there in a heartbeat…y/n I'm so sorry I haven't called you back. I'm sorry for making you worry about our relationship. But it's me and you baby. I love you. And I still want us."

" Me too Eds...I'm sorry. I'm just worried that I lost you."

" Baby you could never lose me. You're stuck with me."

You laughed a little. " I love-"

" Eds baby, you gonna come?" 

When you heard Ava seductive voice you covered your mouth and quickly hung up.

" What happened!?" Elio asked.

You looked at him and moved your hand. 

"I…I" 

...

@chloe-6123 @irishhappiness @idkidknemore @hiscrimsonangel @hellv1ra @browneyes528 @b-irock @erinsingalong @salenorona23 @eddie-is-a-god @screaming-blue-bagel

[sunshinenextdoor]

Does Seraphina ever lose control of her fire? Is her fire affected by the environment or emotions? 👀

Oh but of course! Have been struggling with it my whole life! Apparently, my parents tried to help me learn how to control it, but I swear to Elios, it's the darn hardest. These flames are like a bunch'a tiny dogs on a leash! Well, with time I learned to moderately take control over them at least, but I'm still not the best at it haha. That's the life of an elemental, I guess. The fire changes according to different weather and emotions yes yes, and if one is a decent observer, can probably tell what is on my mind by taking a look. Also, I despise the rain and cold weather. I look so raggedy, it's terrible! My hair becomes thin and slicks down into curls in the winters, and crops itself down when it rains, it looks like messy bedhair and I don't really like it... Wesley says it looks strangely adorable, but I think he just wants to be kind. And speaking of him, I lose any control of my flames when I'm with him! It is insane! I'm telling you I've never felt that before - besides that one time when I got really angry - and it freaks me out. I hate it because it makes me worry about my dear Wes, what if I accidentally burn him? Oh noes, my fragile heart could not take it. The créme brulée can have it all to itself but not him. Oh, that créme brulée. It was almost perfect, too! Liam told me it'd be great if I did it because he sees some talent in me, and I still goofed it up, look at me.. I also have been into some ceramic artsy stuff that Jun showed me, I love doing things where I can also use my flames for something in the process. I might visit Lynn soon, too. Well, I do believe that is all I have to tell you about the flames! I hope you got an answer from my ramblings, haha.

[fvdvrdvechfgdvd]

OK, nothing to do with Daddy Gosling, but HAHAHA, I've been browsing this page and things have come up... I don't know, they're weird, lmao so... hey! to this strange community :') what I am going to publish is not hatred against you (the one who is reading it) or against anyone.I think this has gotten out of hand and it's not from now, it's from a long time ago, so I'd like to say something.The first thing is that cmbyn's "fandom" (if it can be called that) bothers me a lot, a lot, it's a nice movie that talks about things that can happen to a person, but I'm not going to talk about the movie, I'm going to talk about those or those who publish and write nonsense about two men, Timothee and Armie.Girls (probably 14 years old) have made accounts on Ig doing very risque photo editing and no, they are not about Elio and Oliver, they are about Timothee and Armie doing sexual things, also writing sexual things about the two of them on Tumblr, Wattpad and aO3 . I really see this stupid, I see that they have no life, that they don't have enough attention from their parents and they do that kind of thing I don't know why, why is it really ridiculous, but I really fucking love Call Me By Your Name, I love Timothee, not Armie, because of those things he's done, but it's fucking annoying that you do those things, it's stupid and disgusting I really mean it, Armie has children and was married to a woman, after divorcing her, a lot of people did more stupid things . They said Timothee was secretly gay and in love with Armie, speculating about a person is offensive to me and surely to him, since this type of "fans" have said that Timmy is secretly gay and that he loves Armie. I read that close friends and people from Timmy's own family have come out to defend him by saying that he is NOT secretly gay.Now the question is, why the hell do you say that? Why have you ever used queerbating?? Or why did he make a movie that plays not a homosexual but a bisexual teenager? or just because you appreciate your coworker?? And that's why he's secretly gay?? Please! He and Armie define themselves as heterosexual you can't say or speculate that Timothee is gay, you can't make two grown men do something they've done in a fucking movie, have something like in the movie, that's ridiculous and from what I see it's not you understand exactly what a good friendship is. Also when Timothee was in relationship with Lily-Rose Deep they kept shipping them, they insulted Timmy, for being with her and not with Armie, Armie even denounced an account of a 'fan' who asked him to leave his wife (at that time it was) and left with Timothee, who had to fuck Timmy and not his slutty wife, Armie reported the account and said 'it seems that people don't know how to differentiate fiction from reality' and it's true! Really the little girls who say "I love my Armie" "I love my Timmy" "I love them" it's a lie you don't love anyone you are disgusting I really say it and now, I'm already fed up and what I want to get at is that you can't make stories about two people who have worked together, been friends and moved on with their lives, you can't why it's really all in your fucking head you have something in your head that's never going to happen and it's totally ridiculous.Timmy is happy, I don't care if it's with Kylie or Tay or I know with someone else, Armie I don't know, I'll suppose that too, so leave this shit alone, if you really love them as you say and you're fans stop, it is not normal. Timothee is straight, Armie is straight, you can't change the sexuality of two people who are sure of their sexuality. So think, reflect... why it's ridiculous. NOW I AM NOT OFFENDED BY CMBYN FAN ACCOUNTS AT ALL, I LOVE THAT VERY MUCH, but the #Charmie accounts, #CharmieForever #Charmieisreal this... are aberrations and are embarrassing.

[smokszyvverstar]

I am tired from uni, so F it. Havent talked about my AU nobody cares about in a while, and im gonna make it your problem

During Peach's second pregnancy her heart told her it was gonna be a boy and a girl. And Mario has been to the future, and there were the twin prince and princess. So their suprise when the ultrasound comes and, they both appear to be girls. Strange, but whatever, maybe its too early..? Twins are born, they both appear to be girls. Strange.

The twins are about 5 and Elio says something like "i dont want to be a queen like mama, I want to be a king like papa." And Mario and Peach share the most intense like "that makes too much sense" teh pieces fall in place. Peach's heart was right the future is unchanged. They do have a boy and a girl.

Why didn't Elio tell Mario this during the whole time travel world saving thing? Idk

Elena and Elio are joined at the hips, maybe even more than Mario and Luigi. This kinda annoys Chanterelle, as they bounce off each other, but in the future, she will be glad they have each other.

Mario decided not to tell anyone who of the twins is older, because he doesn't want them to feel like each others responsibility. He didn't want the younger to feel like they're stuck in the others shadow, or the older like they have to protect the younger. The twins spent their tweens trying to pry this info out of anyone and everyone. They even tried to get Edama to ask any ghosts that may have haunted the maternity wards. They eventually came to the (incorrect) conclusion that Elio being named after an old friend must've meant something (they don't know about the first paragraph)

Chanterelle has always been this elegant, fancy princess. She always looked up to Peach, a real mama's girl, but she does have a love for heroism like her papa.

One time, when in the Oho oasis with her Zio Luigi and cousin Edama, Chanterelle sneaks out in the night. Luigi wakes up in a cold sweat and, as he usually does when this happens, checks everyone is there. But they're not, Chanterelle is missing. He runs out to find her. He sees a light near the ruins he got thunderhand, and a conflicting feeling in his heart. It knows that's her, so he knows she is safe, but he also knows the trouble these abilities can bring. He rushes to her. Her whole body burning bright like a star. When she sees him she cries out for help, he holds her tight, and tells her to breathe slowly. The firebrand reacted with the heart magic inherited from Peach, and was too much for her. Elio and Elena are forbidden from going to Oho Oasis.

[multi-fandom-imagine]

The Little Mermaid || Anthony Bridgerton || pt1

“Once upon a time their was a little mermaid that longed to be human and a man that wanted more out of life and how they fell in love. This is their story .”

A/n: Collage made by me

You wanted more out of your dull life….more.

You wanted to go on land.

It was something that you’ve always had longed for, something that in you that would always pull you to the surface. The lake you and your sisters lived in was peaceful enough and they always warned you how the surface dwellers were dangerous but how can they be so dangerous when it seemed so wonderful.

Your desire to be on land might do with the fact with wanting to see him, the human that had caught your attention for years, you do anything to meet him.

The man you would catch glimpses of as he swam feet from you. The man you would watch from afar as he would row on those wooden things.

To go to those balls he would often talk about the others he was with, you wondered what it might feel like to touch him.

And it happened one day when the sun was setting, you were watching the fish swim around something you would find yourself doing rather often since your sisters would scold you from going to the surface when the sun was still shinning.

You had heard the rather loud splash in the water, you felt something rather large hit the lack but it was the panicked scream that drew your attention. Curious you decided to swim to the source of the sound, and that’s when you saw him. You wondered why he wasn’t swimming to the surface. Then you saw the blood floating in the water, his eyes closed.

Tensing you wondered what you should do, should you just let him drown? Would someone even save him?

Biting your lip you clutched the fabric of his clothes, pushing your tail to move faster. It didn’t take long for you to break the surface of the water nor when you swam him to shore. You hair slipped past your shoulders as you placed your hand upon his cheek. His skin was so cold, brushing a strand of the dark curls out of his eyes you lent close pressing your lips against his.

Feeling pressure against his lips Anthony’s eyes snapped open to see a woman hovering over him. It wasn’t just any woman, she was naked from what he could tell though that only brought on a coughing fit from him.

Hearing the laughter he turned to woman narrowing his eyes. “Yes yes. Because me nearly drowning is very funn-did you....did you save me?.”

Tipping your head to him you gave the strange man a gentle smile only for it to vanish once you heard the voices. Panicking you turned back to the man, pushing away you dove back into the waters.

“Wait!”

“Anthony!”

“Brother what happened.”

Anthony didn’t know what to say? What could he say? “I…I do not know.” He felt like he was going crazy. Did he imagine the woman? He had too...but the kiss. Placing his fingers on his lip he felt Benedict help him to his feet as the men walked back to the estate. “I need to rest.”

“What were you thinking y/n! saving a human” One of your sisters hissed, her hair floated around her as she tugged you towards the cave. “What if he saw you?”

“Nothing happened! H-he...I was not about to let him drown.” You huffed crossing your arms over your chest. “I don’t understand why we can’t talk to the humans....it’s stupid.”

“Why do you even one legs, it’s strange” another of your sister commented.

“They can walk, they can run, they can stay all day in the sun!.” You can feel tears start to swell in your eyes. “Flipping our fins we can’t get to far. Legs are required for jumping and dancing.”

Dancing, you always wanted to dance.”

“ENOUGH!....enough of this talk, this...It is what keeps us safe.” Another one of your sisters commented as she tugged you over to your little nest. “Now get some sleep.”

“Hmp”

“Go on Elios...tell us again, who saved our dear brother?” Benedict did his best to stifle his laughter as Colin snickered next to him, their mother fretted over the man as she cleaned out the cut on his head.

“It was a mermaid mother! She was beautiful and she saved Anthony!”

“Stop with that childish nonsense" Anthony snapped, “A woman just....happened to be close and she pulled me out of the waters and left before you three arrived.”

“Do you honestly believe that” Eolis huffed crossing her arms over her chest. She wasn’t blind, she saw the tail.

Colin let out a laugh, it was even better seeing Anthony flush from the embarrassment. “If I am being honest....I would run to if I saw Anthony's mug.”

“All of you stop this at once and Anthony please get some rest.” Violet sighed shaking her head as she stepped out of the room.

You didn’t remember much from when you got captured, you did remember the pain of the net digging into your fins. You remembered wanting to call out to your sisters but you stopped because you didn’t want to suffer the same fate. You remember seeing the blue of the lake tint red with your blood.

You remembered the gaze of those humans, you didn’t understand what they were looking at. 

You remembered one of the men touching your breasts, him making some comment about how shinny the scales covering your skin were, how soft your hair was and how much of a shame it was that you didn’t have the lower half of a woman.

You remembered those men selling you off to another strange man but the people with him were kind. They said they were part of a circus and these people taught you how to read, how to write though you were still unhappy. 

You might have been on land but you were still stuck with your fin, people gasped, the tiny humans, they were the ones you liked the most and while you saw so many people from the little tub you were forced in you had hoped you would see him...you just never thought it would be so soon.

Eloise was feeling giddy, she was happy that her brothers were accompanying her to the circus. Something that she’s always dreamed about going but it seemed that it was a thing that would never happen.

“A circus! Can you believe they are finally here! I heard so many things!” Eloise eagerly shouted as she and her brothers pushed through the crowds, he eyes landing on a particular tent. A man shouting about a mystical creature.

“What a load of rubbish.” Anthony muttered as he trailed after his sister.

Once he reluctantly paid the man he slipped into the tent, people gathered near a large tank. He was bored, far bored.

“Must be a large fish.” He muttered as Benedict let out a snort.

It was Eloise’s gasp that made him look up.

“She’s beautiful.”

His sister was correct, you were indeed beautiful though he couldn’t understand why you looked so familiar. “Yes...yes she is.” He felt hypnotized by you, you were smiling at everyone until your eyes locked onto him. A seductive smile formed on your face as you lent against the tub, your hair slipping past your shoulders.

Yes you were indeed a beautiful woman and he had every intention on finding out who you were.

[ratingtheframe]

10 Films to watch this Valentine’s Day if you’re single as hell.

If anyone or anything is making you feel worthless on the Capitalist Holiday that is Valentine’s Day because you’re single AF, then don’t fret because it means one of two things;

You’re happy enough with yourself to not need anyone else.

You’re allergic to people.

Though mine is both the former and the latter, I can still get down to a good romance movie now and again. Now I’m not talking about those horrendous rom coms that Netflix seems to be churning out every damn minute, but those emotionally invested, earthy and well written dramas that has you ugly crying into your bathrobe for 17 minutes straight (me at the end of Her.). Here is a compiled list of some of the best romance films I’ve seen over the years and how each one doesn’t showcase an abundance of clichés and brands them as “acts of love”.

A Star is Born (2018 or 1953, take your pick)

I’ve found that both the 1953 version of A Star is Born with Judy Garland and the 2018 newer version to be a perfect and well rounded love story. What makes this love story so fierce is the vulnerabilities and downfall of its characters, which even though there are many sad moments, it perpetuates and strengthens the acts of love shown in the film. Both versions are similar in that they follow a woman who’s rise to fame as a performer becomes overshadowed by her jealous partner, who is also a notable celebrity. In the 2018 version starring Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper, Gaga’s character Ally is helped by a country singer, Jackson Maine to become a successful singer and icon amongst the music industry. As she rises, Jackson falls and the character dynamics and intensity between them is a fitting love story. I was thoroughly bawling at the end and I guarantee you will too as Lady Gaga’s rendition of Love Again was the true scene stealer of the film. 

Call me by your name (2017)

I have an incredible bias towards this film and it has nothing to do with the film’s context or characters or even Timothée Chalamet The reason why I feel so connected to this film and proclaim it as my favourite film of all time is because of when I watched the film. It’s almost like seeing a film about a political event right after it's happened; you have this rush and connection towards something that’s actually affected you in the real world. I had the same feeling with Call me by your name after going through a rough and confusing patch whilst trying to get over someone I thought I truly loved. Turns out I didn’t (thank god) and yet Call me your name was almost like a shoulder to cry on. It’s a film that’s taught me to love and love hard but most importantly, not beat yourself up or try to distinguish the pain felt by true love. If you haven’t been fortunate to catch this beauty of a film, it follows two men, Elio (Timothée Chalamet) and Oliver (Armie Hammer) and their brief relationship in the summer of 1983 in Northern Italy. 17 year old Elio lives with his parents and his father (Michael Stuhlbarg) is a scholar who invites students from outside the country for the summer in hope of passing on his wisdom to them. This is when Oliver arrives, a handsome twenty something American who becomes the infatuation of Elio. 

I’ll never forget the first time I heard the monologue that Elio’s father gave his son at the end, explaining to Elio why he shouldn’t feel embarrassed by the pain he felt after loving Oliver:

“We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster, that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to make yourself feel nothing so as not to feel anything - what a waste”

That, ladies and gentlemen and all in between, is what love is.

Her. (2013)

Once again, another film about love that had a profound effect on me because of when I watched it. Her. follows the story of Theodore (Joaquin Phoenix) and his search for a story using an A.I to help him write. However, after getting to know this A.I named Samantha (Scarlett Johansson) and hearing the way she adapts and shows emotions, he soon falls in love with it. Some may deem this as rather sad (which it is) but I think it speaks to bigger constructs like internet dating and letting go of people you loved thus diminishing the fantasy and world you created for the two of you. This part of the film got to me a stark way as I felt the pain of letting go of not only a person, but a fantasy, just like Theodore had to do in letting his past partners go. Her. is truly beautiful, with some great production design, cinematography and acting.

Portrait of a Lady on Fire (2019)

The absolute queen of love stories would be Céline Sciamma’s Portrait of a Lady on Fire, a film about the romance between two women in the late 18th Century. Definitely not a narrative you see every day or one that’s been painted in such a way (pun intended). Marianne (Noémie Merlant) is commissioned to paint the beautiful and stubborn Héloïse (Adèle Haenel) and the portrait is to be gifted to a suitor of Héloïse’s from Milan. But instead of getting the painting done and sending it off, Marianne and Héloïse unexpectedly fall for one another at a subtle and well timed pace that had me gawping at the screen the entire way through. Slow, sensual and moving is Portrait of a Lady on Fire and I would definitely say is one of the best LGBTQ plus films ever made to date.

Broke Back Mountain (2005)

Ang Lee scooped up a BAFTA, Golden Globe and Oscar for his direction on his adapted screenplay of Brokeback Mountain. Ennis Del Mar (Heath Ledger) and Jack Twist (Jake Gyllenhaal) form a romantic bond after shepherding alone together on the side of a mountain. Once their time herding sheep comes to a close and they return back to their respective lives, it's clear that their bond is stronger than they had anticipated. They live in constant fear of their relationship becoming apparent to those around them, which leaves one of them taking matters into their own hands. A controversial yet extremely successful film of its time, Brokeback Mountain does a fabulous job of showcasing the consequences and despair of love using two of Hollywood’s finest actors.

Carol (2013)

It’s difficult to fully appreciate LGBTQ plus films set in the past as they mostly focus on the persecution of homosexuals as opposed to the love they wish to express. However, this was pretty accurate of the time and it's only very recently that we have begun to accept one another’s sexualities and genders fully so much that we play these stories out on screen without the persecution part. Carol is a film directed by Todd Haynes and stars Rooney Mara and Cate Blanchett. I found them to be an extremely intense pairing whilst they unravelled as their characters on screen. Therese (Rooney Mara) works in the toy department of a department store when one day she lays eyes upon Carol Aird, a beautiful and elegant married woman who becomes the infatuation of Therese. Therese throws all caution to the wind in order to be closer to Carol and because of this and the 1950s society they live in, their relationship is doomed from the beginning. I was in complete awe of the way Carol had been shot and created into this sensual and rich drama set in the 1950s. From the costumes, to the lighting to the acting, everything about Carol held weight to it showcasing the devotion of a truly talented director.

Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind (2004)

Usually I’d pass on a Charlie Kaufman film, seeing as they make no sense, however I felt that it was time I delved into this cult classic starring Kate Winslet, Jim Carrey, Kirsten Dunst, Mark Ruffalo and Elijah Wood. It’s a really well made film with a clear and distinct message to it that’s represented in some phenomenal filmmaking techniques. The plot line of this film follows a man trying to erase a past lover and his memories of her get wiped away physically before your eyes on screen. It made me wish that I could do the same with people I’ve liked in the past, but the contradictory of this would be the trauma of eventually ending up with someone you had already met in another life. I haven’t experienced a break up nor felt the pain of one, though I could judge that this film tells that experience really well.

Moonlight (2016)

Moonlight is one of few films that I would genuinely worship if it were a religion. It's also one of the films that I outwardly shame people for not having seen, as it is truly a masterpiece and film lover’s film. Deep, emotionally connected, colourful, harsh, moving and eye opening, this film takes you on an emotional rollercoaster through the eyes of Chiron and the three stages of his life that have carved out his essence as a human being. Not only that, but he falls in love with another boy at his school, and when he does, he’s hurt rather badly. Literally. Moonlight is the definition of profundity and was awarded the top prize of Best Picture at the 2017 Academy Awards. 

Loving (2016)

When I think of a truthful and honest testament of love, the film Loving comes to mind which is a fitting title for such a delicate yet strong story. The film is based on a true story of an interracial couple, Richard and Mildred (Joel Edgerton and Ruth Negga) being banned from Virginia in the 1950s for choosing to be together. If that ain’t a true sacrifice of love, then I don’t know what is. Choosing someone you love over your own home is an unfathomable thing and certainly shows the strength that this couple had in facing the judgements of others whilst remaining emotionally truthful to themselves. 

The Shape of Water (2017)

The Shape of Water is a strange yet enlightening love story between Eliza, a deaf woman (Sally Hawkins) and a creature being tested on in a laboratory. Awards season went mental for this back in 2018, winning four of the THIRTEEN Oscars it was nominated for. I would categorize it as quite the niche film and wouldn’t usually think that such a film could be garnered with Oscar success. However everyone who worked on this film really pulled out the stops in creating an entire new world and perspective that has many layers to it, as well as an abundance of conflict and dynamics for audiences to lull over. The relationship between Eliza and the feared swamp monster that’s being cruelly tested in the laboratories where she works, is heartfelt and honest, which is strange seeing as Eliza’s virtually in love with a monster. The casting in this was outlandish yet it really worked as all actors in this melded well into the story as their prospective characters. It also has one of the most touching endings to a film I’ve ever seen.

And there you have it, ten Romance films for you to enjoy this Valentine’s Day. Watch them all at once, or maybe just watch one. Whether you watch it alone or with someone, it doesn’t really matter!

Lots of love

Ang x

[trini-trin-trin]

Sharing this from a FB group that I am in. I was very moved by the article and felt affinity with the experiences shared. A really sweet read.

Here is the article if you don't want to click on the link (I know it is a little long, but well worth your time to read!):

The letter I received ten years ago was unsigned and bore no return address. Clearly its author did not expect, much less want, a reply. A message in a bottle, from no one to no one, that letter still remains the most bizarre form of communication. It asks nothing but to be read, promises nothing but to share a few facts and feelings, and, seeing that it must have been dashed off on a lined yellow sheet that seemed hastily torn out of a pad of paper, the author would not be surprised if, after skimming through it, the recipient decided to crumple and lob it into the closest dust bin.

The letter is one page long. One page is enough. The handwriting is uneven, perhaps because the author had lost the habit of writing in longhand and preferred the keyboard. But his grammar is perfect. The man knew what he was doing. I assume he was writing the note by hand because he didn’t want traces of it on his laptop, or because he knew he was never going to send it as an email and risk a reply. Now that I think of it, he probably didn’t care if it even reached its recipient, a local Bay Area reporter who had mentioned my novel about two young men who fall in love one summer in Italy in the mid-1980s. The reporter eventually forwarded it to me, minus its envelope with the postmark. It took no time to see that all the author of the letter was looking for was a chance to blurt out the words he couldn’t dare breathe elsewhere.

My book had spoken to him. His letter spoke to me.

So here it is: dated April 16, 2008.

I came upon Mr. Aciman’s book while on a business trip back East. Not the type of book I am normally able to read, so I bought a copy for the flight home. I think I’m glad I did.

You see, I was Elio. I was 18 and my Oliver was 22. Though the time and place were different, the feelings were remarkably the same. From believing that you are the only person who has these feelings, to the whole “he loves me – he loves me not” scenario, Mr. Aciman got it right. I was particularly impressed with the attention he gave to the morning after Elio’s and Oliver’s first encounter. The guilt, the loathing, the fear. I felt it too much. I had to put the book down for a while.

But in the end I was able to finish the book before we landed at SFO. Which was good, because I couldn’t take the book home. Unlike Elio it was I who married and had children. My Oliver died from AIDS in 1995. I’m still living a parallel life. My name is not important. His name was Dwight.

Instead, I kept the letter. I kept it for ten years.

What moved me was not just its sobering matter-of-factness or its hint of downplayed sorrow, but the associations it provoked in my mind. It reminded me of those short, clipped messages to loved ones, written by people about to be shipped off to the death camps who knew they’d never be heard from again. There is a chilling immediacy about their hurriedly scribbled notes that say everything there is to say in the fewest possible words — there wasn’t enough time for more, no smarmy pieties, no hand-wringing, no treacly hugs and kisses before the tragic end. It also made me think of the moving phone messages left by those who finally realized they were not going to make it out alive from the Twin Towers and that only their family’s answering machine was going to take their call.

“My name is not important,” he writes, almost as an apology for remaining anonymous; yet the author drops quite a number of hints about himself — hints he likely knows will stir his reader’s wistful curiosity to know what made him write the letter in the first place, what he hoped to accomplish, and if writing did indeed help. The letter itself allows us to see that he travels for business. We also sense that he probably lives in the Bay Area and that he travels not infrequently to the East Coast, since, as he writes, he is “back” in the East. And we know one thing more: that he simply needed to come out and tell someone that a man called Dwight had been his lover when the two were young. The rest is a cloud. We’ll never know more. Writing has served its purpose. We write, it seems, to reach out to others. Whether we know them or not doesn’t matter. We write to put out into the real world something extremely private within us, to make real what often feels unreal and ever so elusive about ourselves. We write to give a shape to what would otherwise remain amorphous. This is as true about authors as about those who want to correspond with them. Over the years, many have written to me either after reading or seeing Call Me by Your Name. Some tried to meet me; others confided things they’d never told anyone; and some even managed to call me at the office and, on speaking about my novel, would eventually apologize before bursting out crying. Some were in jail; some were barely adolescents, others old enough to look back at loves seven decades past; and some were priests locked in silence and secrecy. Many were closeted, others totally out; some were widows who felt a resurgence of hope if only by reading about the loves of two young men called Elio and Oliver in Italy; some were very young girls eager to meet their long-awaited Oliver; and some recalled former gay lovers whom they’d occasionally bump into years later but who’d never acknowledge what they’d once shared and done together when both were schoolmates and neither was married. All were keenly aware of living a parallel life. In that parallel life things are as they perhaps should be. Elio and Oliver still live together. And no one has secrets there.

Unlike Dwight’s lover, everyone who took the time to write to me did not withhold their names, but all had, at one point or another, withheld something very primal. They withheld it from themselves, from a relative, from a friend, a classmate, or colleague, or from a beloved who would never have guessed what troubled longings seethed below their averted gaze whenever they crossed paths.

Some readers wrote to tell me they felt that my novel had changed them, and given them new insights into themselves; some felt it was urging them finally to turn a new leaf in their lives. But some couldn’t go so far and, despite their perfect command of language, confessed lacking the words to explain why they were so moved by my novel or why they felt an unresolved longing for things they’d never considered or desired before. They were experiencing an upwell of emotions and of ungraspable might-have-beens that were asking to be reckoned with because they seemed more real than life itself, a sense of themselves that beckoned from an opposite bank they’d never known was there and whose potential loss now was a source of inconsolable grief. Hence their tears, their regrets, and the overpowering sense of being lost in their own lives.

And yet, they said, theirs were not tears of sorrow. They were tears of recognition, as though the novel itself were a mirror for readers to watch their own emotions laid bare before them. These responses made me aware that Call Me by Your Name does not call attention to anything readers didn’t already know, nor does it bring new truths or revelations; all it does is shed new light on things that were long familiar but that they never took the time to consider. It would be so tempting to say that they are reminded of their forgotten first loves; the truth is that all loves, even those that occur late in life, are first loves. There is always fear, shame, reluctance, and not a tiny dose of spite. Desire is agony.

Everyone who’s read Call Me by Your Name understands not only the struggle both to speak and hold back their truth but also the shame that comes whenever we want something from someone. Desire is always cagey, always secretive — we’ll tell everyone we know about the person we crave to hold naked in our arms, but the very last one to know this will be the person we crave. Same-sex desire is even more guarded and watchful, especially in those who are just discovering their sexuality. Awkwardness and desire are strange bedfellows at a young age, but shame and inexperience are just as paralyzing as fear when we watch them tussling with the urge to be bold. You’re torn between the raw horniness that makes you dream scenes you hope to forget as soon as you’re up and the scenes you pray you’ll dream again and again — if dreams are all you’ll have. Silence and solitude exact a cost that leaves us emotionally wrecked. At some point we need to speak.

So “is it better to speak or die?” asks Elio, the narrator of Call Me by Your Name, quoting words penned by the sixteenth-century Marguerite de Navarre in her collection of tales known as The Heptameron. Marguerite was the sister of King Francis I and the grandmother of Henry IV, himself the grandfather of Louis XIV, hence she was plenty familiar with court intrigue, gossip, and the risks of opening up to someone who may not welcome what’s in our heart and could easily make us pay for it. Not everyone who has written to me has dared to speak their hearts to those they loved. Some have sought silence — slow, lingering droplets of quiet desperation taken every night before bedtime until they realize they’ve been dead and didn’t even know it. Many have written to me with the feeling of having missed their chance when someone tethered his rowboat to their jetty and simply asked them to jump in. “Some sentence or thought on almost every page,” writes a reader, “triggers tears and knots my throat and chest. Tears well up in my eyes on the subway, at my computer at work, walking down the street. Perhaps I am weeping in part because I know that at my age there is virtually no possibility of experiencing anything remotely comparable to what Elio experiences with Oliver.” Someone else writes, “Reading Call Me by Your Name made me feel a love I never had.” A happily married 50-plus colleague took me aside and said, “I don’t think I’ve ever been this much in love in my whole life.” “I'm 23,” tweeted someone else, “and have never felt such love, until I read Call Me by Your Name. I feel like I lived it.” “Elio and I are essentially the same age,” writes a teenage girl. “I have never really experienced his environment of the Italian summer…My experiences have only taken place halfway between nature and smog, however I have felt the same tension, fear, guilt and overwhelming love that you express perfectly through both Elio and Oliver…Finding myself in Elio was something I never expected and I’m positive that I won’t experience anything quite like it ever again. The first girl I ever loved remains…the only girl I have ever loved and though everything she and I shared…lives now as a secret between two friends.” “I finished reading Call Me by Your Name a couple of days ago,” writes someone else, “and wanted to let you know how much it affected me. It felt like a narration of my thoughts that I had systematically buried long ago.” And finally this from a 72-year-old: “I was fascinated by the idea of parallel lives where would I have been if I had gone with him, where would I be if I traveled alone? Maybe the point is just what do I do with the gift you have given me during the remainder of my life.”

There are at least 500 more such letters and emails.

Some find themselves weeping at the end of the film or the novel, not for what happened long ago or for what did not and might never happen in their own lives but for what has yet to happen, for the terrifying moment when they too will soon have to decide whether to speak or die. This from an 18-year-old: “[Your novel] gives me hope that one day I will meet someone whom I desire so badly that I’ll actually find it in me to make a move, the way Oliver is that someone for Elio. Maybe my Oliver will also turn out to be someone that I realize I love as well as desire.” She was crying for a week, as was this 15-year-old young man: “I stopped reading…because I didn’t want [the book] to end, didn’t want the wounds that you caused me to close, I didn’t want to overcome, for some reason that I have yet to find out. I wanted to stay a wreck, emotionally and mentally fragile….My mother handed me tissues because she had never seen me cry like this. I had finished your book and ‘moved’ is too weak a word to express what your book had done to me. Here a week later and it is literally all I can think about, not my midterms coming up, but…Elio and Oliver and if it is better to speak or die. You answered questions I didn’t even think I had.”

Indeed, the whole novel seems to enable the outing of all manner of feelings, feelings from Elio’s relentless inward journey and obsessive self-examination that readers are invited to identify with. Through Elio’s unfettered introspection they too feel exposed and sliced open like a crustacean without a slough, now forced to look at itself in the mirror. No wonder they are moved. The mask that is torn off their faces is not just the mask that conceals same-sex desires from themselves and from others. Rather, it is the realization, through Elio’s voice, of what they truly feel, who they truly are, what they fear, what bears their signature, and what coy little shenanigans they go through to read others and hope to reach them. Some identified with some effusive sentences in my novel so much that they had them tattooed on their bodies. They even attach photos of these tattoos. People have also tattooed peaches on themselves!

But what moves most people — and this is as true now as it was when the novel first came out — is the father’s speech. Here he not only tells his son to nurse the flame and “don’t snuff it out” after his son’s lover has left Italy, but that he too, the father, envies his son’s relationship with a male lover. This speech tears away the last vestige of a veil between reader and truth and is a moving tribute to the irreducible honesty between father and son.

Most readers have written to me about the scene because the father’s speech rekindles the very difficult moment when they decided to come out to their parents — or, as is often the case with people 60, or 70 or older, it reminds them of the conversation they wished they’d had but never did have with their parents. This is the loss no one forgets and from which no one recovers after seeing Call Me by Your Name. It bears the very essence of that precious and life-defining might-have-been moment that never happened and never will.

Here is the speech:

“Look…[y]ou had a beautiful friendship. Maybe more than a friendship. And I envy you. In my place, most parents would hope the whole thing goes away, or pray that their sons land on their feet soon enough. But I am not such a parent. In your place, if there is pain, nurse it, and if there is a flame, don’t snuff it out, don’t be brutal with it. Withdrawal can be a terrible thing when it keeps us awake at night, and watching others forget us sooner than we’d want to be forgotten is no better. We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster than we should that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything — what a waste!...

“… {L]et me say one more thing. It will clear the air. I may have come close, but I never had what you had. Something always held me back or stood in the way. How you live your life is your business. But remember, our hearts and our bodies are given to us only once. Most of us can’t help but live as though we’ve got two lives to live, one is the mockup, the other the finished version, and then all those versions in between. But there’s only one, and before you know it, your heart is worn out, and, as for your body, there comes a point when no one looks at it, much less wants to come near it. Right now there’s sorrow. I don’t envy the pain. But I envy you the pain.”

I received the anonymous letter sometime in early May 2008. At the time, I was staying at my parents’, because my father was suffering from throat and mouth cancer and was already in hospice care. He had refused radiation and chemotherapy, so I knew his days were numbered; though morphine was clouding his mind, he was still lucid enough to bandy a few quips about a host of subjects. He had stopped eating and drinking water because swallowing had become very painful. One afternoon while I was stealing a nap, the phone rang. A reporter I’d met in California had just received a letter, which she wanted to share with me. I told her to read it over the phone. After she’d read it I asked if she felt she could mail it to me. I wanted to show it to my father, I said, and explained he was dying. She felt for me. We talked about my father for a while. I told her I was trying to make it up to him these days, and that he too had been exceptionally easy to be with. How was it growing up with him? she asked. Tense, I replied. Always is, she added. Then the conversation ended, and she promised to mail the letter soon.

After hanging up, I got out of bed and went in to see him. Over the past few days, I had made a point of reading to him, which he liked a great deal, especially now that he was having difficulty focusing. But rather than read to him the memoirs of Chateaubriand, one of his favorite authors, and feeling buoyed by the letter I’d been read on the phone, I asked if he’d like me to read from the French translation of Call Me by Your Name, the galleys of which I had just received from Paris that very morning. Why not, since you wrote it, he said. He was proud of me. So I began to read from the very beginning, and soon enough I knew I was opening up a subject neither he nor I had ever broached before. But I knew he knew what I was reading and why I was reading it to him. This made me happy. Perhaps it made him happy as well. I’ll never know.

That evening, after the rest of us had dinner, he asked if I could continue reading from my novel. I was nervous about arriving at the father’s speech because I didn’t know how he’d react to it, though he was the kind of father who would have given that very same speech himself. But the speech was two hundred pages away still, and that would have taken many, many days. Perhaps I should skip some parts, I thought. But no, I wanted to read him the whole book. My father didn’t last long enough to hear the father’s speech. And when the letter finally arrived from California, he was already gone. His name was Henri, he was 93 years old, and he inspired everything I’ve written.

[bubblytarts]

The Adults of the Emissary AU

Because of course our protagonists can’t take on all these bad guys by themselves! There are lots of grown-ups who TOTALLY know what they’re doing, haha! (Which, of course, is a lie. They have no idea what’s going on either!)

And there’s also the bad guys here that play important parts, because they’re here too, and some play some very interesting roles.

*Also disclaimer that there is some shipping. 

HAHA AND THE THEME OF THIS GOING UNDER THE CUT BECAUSE IT’S WAY TOO LONG CONTINUES

Giovanni - As if he wouldn’t be included. After being defeated by Blue and then completely decimated by Red, Giovanni disappeared. But not to hide, but to gather his new forces. He would love for Silver to join him, but his son wants nothing to do with him. Giovanni is not someone to empathize with. He is cold, calculating, and willing to do terrible things to get his power and revenge. 

Lance - Lance is an interesting case, but a crucial one. Lance is normally very calm with an intense edge, but recently that’s changed. He’s been having nightmares about a little girl, who warns him of terrible things yet to come. This has been going on for a while, and Lance is getting a little desperate as to what it all means. 

Steven - As the Champion of the Hoenn region, Steven wants to do what’s best for both people and pokemon. He convinces Brendan to feel the same once he realizes that Brendan might defeat him in a challenge. However, his father and the pokemon league may not agree with some of Steven’s environmentalist methods, as the league is pushing for a more industrial approach. It makes the confrontation with Teams Magma and Aqua more intense for Steven, who agrees with their end goals, but not the means of going about it. 

Wallace - Wallace is the Sootopolis gym leader, a contest idol, the guardian of the Cave of Origin, and Steven’s loyal husband. Wallace is much more laid-back than Steven, and so is helpful in calming Steven, Brendan, and May down when they all get hyped up about something. Wallace also is an incredibly skilled trainer, and fights both Archie and Maxie at the same time, defeating Maxie before Archie slips away. 

Archie - Archie’s motivation is the same as it always has been. However, he would very much like to be friends with Maxie again, as it seemed like their friendship was developing into something more before they split into Magma and Aqua. But now, Kyogre is all that matters. Beat Maxie. Increase the sea. Those are the only rules. But there should have been an extra rule about making sure to not touch the Blue Orb, because that’s where the real problem is.

Maxie - Maxie’s motivation is the same as it always has been. While he wants to talk to Archie about their past, his pride won’t let him, and if that fails, Tabitha definitely won’t let him. In the meantime, summon Groudon. When Maxie is defeated by Wallace at the Cave of Origin, Archie surges ahead to summon Kyogre. While Maxie is able to summon Groudon to fight Kyogre, he has much bigger problems with Archie’s situation. And then of course, is when Giovanni makes his entrance.

Cynthia - Cynthia is a bit scatterbrained and tends to ramble on, but she knows that something is amiss. It’s pure luck that Dawn, Barry, and Lucas figure out Team Galactic’s plans before her, but she’s always right there to make sure the kids never get in over their heads. As for the leader of Team Galactic, she never thought she’d see him again, and as soon as she stops Giratina, she’s having a very stern talk about how you don’t abandon friends. Unfortunately, Cynthia doesn’t really get to have that talk. 

Cyrus - Cyrus’s motivation has always been the same. To get rid of spirit. Dawn and Cynthia just keep interrupting his plans and trying to talk to him about feelings and happiness. Getting trapped in the Distortion World isn’t the worst, if it means he can avoid talking to Cynthia, but Giovanni has other plans. 

Ghetsis - Ghetsis is the worst. There’s literally nothing else to say. He tries to kill N constantly once N figures out that Ghetsis isn’t as kind as he says he is. He’s dismissive of Colress. And he’s the reason that Hilbert goes missing for two years. Ghetsis is so mean he makes Giovanni look like a Dunsparce. He inserts himself into Giovanni’s evil boy band with the plan of taking over. At least he’s not subtle about it. Giovanni knows exactly what’s going on.

Colress - Colress is one of the only members of Rainbow Rocket to voluntarily join, and the only one of the voluntary ones to not be seeking revenge. He’s merely interested in what Giovanni intends to do with this “Ultra Space” plan of his. If he can study the strange readings he’s been getting from certain trainers, then he’ll be happy. That, and if Ghetsis and Rosa will both leave him alone. 

Sycamore - Sycamore has a lot of issues. All signs point to Lysandre somehow being involved with Team Flare, but he would never do something that stupid. And when the truth comes out, how can Sycamore ever forgive the man he thought he’d spend the rest of his life with?

Diantha - Diantha knows that Lysandre must be involved with Team Flare, but she doesn’t want to accuse him without having any solid proof. If it’s not true, she’ll ruin her friendship with Lysandre. If it’s true, Sycamore will be inconsolable. Diantha’s stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Lysandre - Lysandre knows the world must be purified. Even at great personal loss. His plan is to keep Diantha off his back and Sycamore blissfully unaware. But then a crucial part of his plan goes missing, and Lysandre fails to see his best laid plans falling to pieces around him. Even when he is left for dead, Giovanni and Colress can’t seem to let him die in peace. 

Kukui - Kukui’s pretty chill, considering that the kids are discovering portals to a suspicious alternate world. That’s more Burnet’s thing, anyway. He figures that Selene can handle herself with that, and he might need to hop in to help Elio with taking down Team Skull. He’s got some unfinished business he really would like to discuss. 

Burnet - Burnet is one of the lucky ones. She avoids getting involved with the Ultra Space fiasco in Alola, but manages to learn a lot from the experience. What comes first in her mind now is to fix the friendships that have been damaged by past events, like Kukui and Guzma’s. Her experience with Ultra devices will definitely come in handy though.

Guzma - Guzma had a tough time when Lusamine got involved with Ultra Space, but now he’s having a nice time helping Kukui around the lab. They’re on much better terms now, and Guzma’s ready to put his past behind him. It’s a shame Rainbow Rocket goes after him first.

Lusamine - Lusamine went into hiding after being defeated by Selene, Elio, and their friends. Giovanni quickly reached out to her, and Lusamine became one of the most loyal members of Rainbow Rocket. She even got Colress to promise her a Nihilego sometime. She has yet to cash in the deal, but it’s there.

Faba - It was Lusamine who recommended that Giovanni invite Faba to help Colress with his latest project. Colress despises the man, but Faba definitely helped to get the project off the ground a lot quicker. 

Leon - As Galar’s champion, Leon’s a busy man. Lucky for him, he’s got Rose to support him. However, some of Rose’s behavior is a bit concerning. Leon may be the worst at reading directions, but he’s got a knack for reading people. Rose is up to something, and Leon’s going to protect Hop and his friends from whatever Rose is scheming. 

Sonia - Sonia’s got a lot on her plate as the new pokemon professor of Galar. Most recently, she’s been invited to help work on the Universal PokeDex and help write the entries on Dynamax. If only she wasn’t a technology disaster. 

Rose - Rose knows what has to be done for Galar. He also knows that Leon isn’t clever enough to catch on. That may not be true. Rose hires Victor as his personal photographer, and while the future of Galar comes first, Victor has a very interesting story from his time in Kalos, and Rose is desperate to know what secret the boy is leaving out.

Looker - Looker’s investigated teams Rocket, Galactic, and Flare, and been hired to help track down former members of every other team that’s popped up in the past decade. Too many coincidences are happening to let the leaders of these organizations escape him, and Looker knows he’s about to crack the case. 

[kill-your-authors]

The absolute funniest headcanons about Joe x Nicky out there are, hands down, the ones made by people who have clearly never been in a long term relationship. And I don’t mean that to be mean! If you haven’t, it doesn’t matter! But let me just say this...Nicky and Joe do not get jealous when someone hits on/or asks the other out. Nicky and Joe do not sneak handjobs/blowjobs/quickies in while members of the guard are in the room, even if they’re sleeping. They are not (and literally, even, in the movie, they are not!) attached at the hip twenty-four seven! They do not need to constantly be reassuring the other that they love him, or even constantly be calling the other a pet name.

They have been together 900 fucking years and I know people - myself included - who lost interest in that kind of behavior within the first year of their relationship. That kind of honeymoon phase - it is something you can’t help in the beginning, because it is new and exciting and you can’t get enough of it, and sometimes it’s fun! But it’s also a result of insecurity and the fear of losing the other by breaking up which Joe and Nicky do not have. That kind of behavior is for amateurs. It is weak. 

Nicky and Joe feel nothing but sorry for people who hit on them. And maybe a little amused, or even a little happy for their significant other getting hit on/asked out. 

Nicky and Joe have gone days, or weeks, or months or fuck! Probably even years - given their lifespans and the nature of their jobs (personally I see them fighting, in say, World War 2, but at different locations on the planet, writing letters to one another about their experiences in battle and how they miss each other for however long the war lasts like those letters between those two gay men in World War 2 and they’re all poetic and sappy but that’s just me)  - without having sex and it was no big deal. Not even something to comment on or notice. Granted, it’s probably not often, and if it is as long as a year or more, it’s probably not something they can help, but nonetheless, it’s not an indication that they no longer desire each other or love each other. 

Like! There have definitely been t h o u s a n d s of times that one of them has said, “I’m too tired, do it yourself.” There have been m i l l i on s of times, one of them has said, “Brush your teeth first, you smell.” This is how people who don’t get to be together for more than fifty years act once they’ve been together for longer than one. Can you even imagine what it’s like after 900? We are talking about a kind of comfortableness and intimacy with one another that no person on earth can imagine. I remember reading that one part in Call Me By Your Name - not the part with the peach, that is definitely an early love kind of nonsense - but the part toward the end, where they’re in the hotel and Elio doesn’t flush the toilet just because he knows that he and Oliver are not going to be in each other’s lives much longer and he wants their relationship to have been as close and as intimate as it can possibly be...And I’m thinking about how early in my marriage, my husband and I were long distance and I travelled cross-country to visit him, packed lingerie and lube and all the fun works - and ended up getting horribly constipated and sick while I was there and we spent the whole night, me sitting on the toilet and him sitting on the bathroom rug, just talking to each other because we missed each other so much and it was like, just not even on either of our minds that I was literally on a toilet and I’m thinking about one of my favorite poems:

Finding Something

Jack Gilbert

I say moon is horses in the tempered dark, because horse is the closest I can get to it. I sit on the terrace of this worn villa the king’s telegrapher built on the mountain that looks down on a blue sea and the small white ferry that crosses slowly to the next island each noon. Michiko is dying in the house behind me, the long windows open so I can hear the faint sound she will make when she wants watermelon to suck on or so I can take her to a bucket in the corner of the high-ceilinged room which is the best we can do for a chamber pot. She will lean against my leg as she sits so as not to fall over in her weakness. How strange and fine to get so near to it. The arches of her feet are like voices of children calling in the grove of lemon trees, where my heart is as helpless as crushed birds.

And I just fucking - fucking think about that okay? How, when you love someone, when you’re a normal person with a normal lifespan who loves someone - there is no barrier between yourself and them. You are as close, and as intimate with one another, as you are with your own body. 

And Nicky and Joe have been together 900 fucking years. 

They are not going to be attached at the hip the way we mean it when we describe a couple as attached at the hip. They are already so mentally and spiritually and emotionally connected, that they could go days or weeks without talking to each other, just living quietly in the same space as one another, and feel no loss for contact whatsoever. Does that mean they do it? No, I’m sure not. Obviously not! They still spoon to bed! They probably don’t just randomly happen to not have sex for a year, or whatever, either. But the point I’m making is, if they were put in that situation, or if it did happen to happen, it would be no indication that they do not love each other anymore. If anything, it is an indication of how MUCH they love each other. They could be put through any test of love in existence - tests not even possible for normal people to face! - and confront it head on with ease. 

Which I think we need to to try to portray in our fan content more often!!!!

[writeblrfantasy]

cygnus & harlan in every eingard series book

i was falling back in love with tes today and i had the idea to slap this together. i'm gonna do this with the other ships, it was lovely to revisit the boys i love so dearly :)

fyi only the first 4 books have been fully completed, i've planned and written snippets of the last 3 but haven't actually written anything serious for them since last summer

“I’ll be just a minute,” Cygnus said, attempting to bind his hair with one hand and pull on his cloak with the other. His hands were shaking, and after a minute of struggling he gave up entirely on the ribbon.

Harlan’s eyes followed the movement. “Allow me.” He stepped behind Cygnus, closer than necessary, and took the ribbon from Cygnus’ fingers. Cygnus shivered as their hands brushed. The heat Harlan was radiating right behind his back was torture.

Cygnus gathered his hair in his fingers and held it out, waiting to feel the ribbon wrap around it. But Harlan gently replaced Cygnus’ fingers with his own, leaving Cygnus stunned and breathless. Iron self-control was the only thing that kept him from leaning into Harlan as he swiftly tied the ribbon into a neat bow. Cygnus swore his hand lingered before pulling away. He was probably making this out to be much more intimate than it actually was, but did he imagine the thick air in the room as well?

***

“Thank you, darling,” Cygnus said, and craned his neck up to kiss him. Harlan smiled and adjusted his black spectacles, as he did constantly while he got used to them. They’d gone from spectacles he only used when stressed and sleep deprived to permanent, as ordered by the healer. Harlan was beyond frustrated about it, but Cygnus had tried consoling him by telling him they were the most attractive thing in the world. Harlan would always retort that they were the world’s greatest annoyance, but Amina knew Cygnus’ comments made him feel a little better.

***

“Hey,” Cygnus whispered, cutting off his train of thought, which was probably for the better. He placed Harlan’s hand on his chest. “Touch me. Feel me. I’m here, aren’t I? I’m alive. I’m okay.” Cygnus looked worse for wear, tired and weathered, but when he smiled, his eyes shone. Harlan’s heart pulsed so strongly he thought it would burst.

“I love you,” Harlan managed, because he didn’t know what else to say, and he needed to say it. In case this happened again. In case next time he wouldn’t get another chance. “Never leave me again.”

“Never, darling.”

***

“Harlan sounds like a god among men, the way you talk about him,” he comments over the rim of his coffee mug.

Cygnus smiles and sighs, picturing the hard, stern eyes of Cora and the off putting scent of Heath, the heat of Elio and even the smile of Nym. But that smile had been distant and strange. Otherworldly.

It’s all too easy, then, to picture the way Harlan’s eyes light up when he casts a spell, the way he shakes his head and fights off a smile when Cygnus has done something childish to warrant it. How he walks through the markets and befriends the merchants and their families to make them feel seen and appreciated by the throne, and just because he likes them. His unwavering patience, his unwavering determination to be fair in his job. The taste of his kisses. The security of his arms at night. His dark, mysterious beauty that intrigued Cygnus years ago.

“He’s better,” Cygnus says, not caring if he sounds like a fool.

***

Harlan insists on helping Cygnus bathe after Easthaven. Cygnus is in too much pain and too willing for a welcome and needed Harlan to take care of him to argue. He gives himself easily into Harlan’s waiting hands. All he has to do is move his limbs enough to undress and lie in the basin. They don’t speak.

Harlan is still furious with himself and with everyone. it shows in his sharp, jerky movements, the symbols of tight control, how tightly he squeezes the cloths to wring them out, as if he’s imagining placing his hands around not-Anson’s throat, his distant, thoughtful eyes, the hard press of his lips together. Nothing Cygnus can say will make him realize it wasn’t his fault, so he just lets Harlan fuss. Cygnus hopes he’ll tire himself out and they’ll fall into bed equally exhausted, one of them pained, tonight.

***

Evan knows she and Amina are the victims here, but that doesn’t mean the rest of them aren’t suffering in silence, too. In the midst of caring for Amina, in the few waking and sleeping moments when her thoughts aren’t filled with Amina’s too still face, Evan sees the exhaustion on Cygnus’. That’s nothing new, but it’s gotten better over the years. It hasn’t been as it is now since the days before Esther took him into her own hands, onto the training ground. Evan is again amazed by her brother, his ability to provide her so much support while giving it all to Cygnus at the same time. Evan sees them cuddled together under the same cloak by the fire night after night, grieving in silence like her.

At least they have each other at all. This ordeal has taught Evan to be thankful for that.

***

The Cael stares them down, trapping them between the certain death of the cliff behind them and certain death in a Caelish prisoner camp. Cygnus never takes his hand off Harlan’s chest like that alone will give him the support he needs. It does.

He turns his back on the Cael to say with a grin, “If we’re going down, we might as well go down together.”

Confusion flashes across Harlan’s eyes for the barest second before realization dawns.

Cygnus pushes them both over the edge.

They can’t die apart, but they can die together, on their own terms.

He kisses Harlan as they fall.

tes taglist (lmk to be added/removed) @magic-is-something-we-create @myhusbandsasemni @sondials @mischiefiswritten @peonypearls-muddled-musings

[blissfulsaturn]

I'm gonna point out couple of more things and then I'm done for today.✨

So, this gif has been circling all day long and it's one of the most realistic things in this movie. We're talking about two men sleeping together for the first time, and i get that some movies (action movies, horror movies) tend to make things look real in them, but here "Call me by your name" is one of those small movies that didn't make a lot of money nor was a lot of money put into making it, this is a movie with a love story between two men, and yet...when it comes to their first time and the morning after, things look so realistic as fuck, almost to the point where you think, what did they do to make it look so realistic. Here are two gifs of one scene, and here is what i have to point out:

Timmy's lips : they're puffy, swollen, red, they look like either him or somebody else bit into it for many hours, they look like they've just been kissed for a very long time

Timmy's eyes : you can totally read regret and shame in them, he's so good in this scene. Might i remind you that this entire scene was done in a one-shot and with zero conversation

Timmy's skin : it's shining, still, like in the midnight scene. This is where his moles can be seen so clearly in the morning light

Timmy's cheeks : they're red and full of shame, i don't know what ran through his head when they filmed this but whatever it is it fits with the morning after shame

I also notice every time that there's a twitch underneath his left eye, just as he looks up, and at the same time, Timmy's upper lip twitches as well, those two are connected

And one of my favorite things : the vein underneath his shoulder bone

That's it for Timmy, now I'm gonna do Armie's fingers in this first gif:

First of all, those fingers are magical and i simply love when a man has long and bony fingers

I stated that Armie has very well taken care off fingernails, they look really good

Now the way he's moving them : he notices that Elio's feeling very strange, he's silent and isn't even looking at him. Before this moment, Elio kinda shoves Oliver's hand away from him and gets up on his elbows. Now, Oliver respects his decision, even though he thought things were gonna go waaay differently than this, he takes his fingers off of him to give him space and then slowly and lightly pulls them away and for just a millisecond they're back onto Timmy's skin and he continues to pull them away

Also, Armie's tattoo is visible, at least the cover up. Usually my fingers look like this when i wear fake jewelry

Now Armie's side of the gif:

Oh, one thing for Timmy though:

His tiny nipples have risen and there are these tiny little white balls on his chest, i don't know what it could be (if this wasn't a movie, I'd guess what it was lol), maybe it was the fake cum, the substance they used to look like Oliver's juices on Elio's chest. And yes, i know, when they wipe each other with Oliver's Billowy, we can see Oliver wiping his chest and then he hands Elio the shirt. This got me thinking : what if there's a scene where they filmed both Elio and Oliver with each other's juices on their chest and decided to go with the one that we got in the movie.

Now Armie, for real :

Armie's eyes : this entire scene was a roller-coaster with emotions, and Armie's eyes go from being satisfied, just before Elio wakes up, to looking glad that he's waking up, and to happy when they look at each other. Then here we see that Oliver's worst nightmare comes to life : to have Elio wake up and regret it. Armie is so fucking amazing here! His blue eyes are wondering, left and right, out of sheer panic. What will he say or how will he look at him when and if he turns around?

Armie's lips : they look puffy and swollen as well, kinda makes sense that they kissed before "waking up" in the movie. But that's just speculation and my imagination. Armie also parts them to say something but decides not to because if anything, Oliver is gonna give Elio the space and time if he needs to process what just happened.

Must point out :

Love how Oliver is in the back and Elio's in the front, and we can't look at both of them at the same time to follow their emotions and facial expressions. First time i watched the movie, my eyes were wondering from Elio to Oliver just to get the full picture. Every single time after that whenever I'd watch the movie i watch Elio, then go back and watch Oliver.

That's it. Hope i did it justice✨