#he loves annoying mae in the beginning

[jellyfilledeyes]

Gumipunk Doodle dump

[goldfish-or-smthing]

The Updated Tedependent Masterpost

Disclaimer: Same as last time! I have no problem with people who ship other things, don't ship anything, or ship Tedependent but don't want/expect it to be canon! This is just a theory... (a TED LASSO theory 😎)

Quick notes:

original post here!

Some of this stuff is new, some of it is old, some of it is my observations, and some of it is from other people... I was just getting annoyed at the old post missing stuff and wanted to have all the Tedependent evidence in one place

I’ll be updating this post if new evidence comes along 😊

PART 1 - The Evidence

Car park/similarities with Michelle

In 1x05 when Ted tells Michelle he’s ready to get divorced, he talks about how their relationship began —at school, in a parking lot. Not only did Ted and Trent visit a school on the day they began to get to know each other, but their last scene of season 2 takes place in the Richmond parking lot, which draws even more parallels between their relationship and that of Ted and Michelle. This post also illustrates some connections between the scene between Michelle and Ted and the one between Ted and Trent at the end of 3x02.

Ted’s focus on Trent

From the very first time he calls on Trent in the press room, we see Ted act differently towards Trent than the other reporters. He makes jokes with him, and Trent responds in turn. Ted also makes Trent’s daughter biscuits, which we never see him do for any other reporter and which also implies that not only has he interacted with Trent outside of work but he’s also met his daughter too, something that he doesn’t appear to do with other journalists.

Parallels between Roy/Keely and Ted/Trent

This is a list within a list! The parallels are: - Roy and Keeley have their first big romantic moment in the Richmond parking lot, which is also where Ted and Trent's last scene of season 2 is set (and connects to the Michelle parking lot speech too). - When Roy first invites Keeley on a date, they do a sort of press room roleplay thing. Not only are they just generally mirroring Ted and Trent, but Keeley literally introduces herself as "Keeley Jones, The Independent Woman", announcing herself in the exact same way that Trent usually does, even down to her joking newspaper name, which is literally.... The Independent Woman... It couldn't really be any more on the nose. - The first scene where we see Roy and Keeley begin to fall for each other is at the end of 1x03, after Roy headbutts Colin in the club and threatens everyone to stop bullying Nate, and we get Keeley and Roy nodding at each other in acknowledgement. As this is happening, Trent is reading out his article about Ted, which could be considered the first time we see Trent beginning to fall for Ted. - Roy and Keeley also have Phoebe, who's almost their pseudo-daughter in some scenes, similar to how Trent has a daughter.

Twelfth Night

In 2x07, at around 31 mins in, we get a scene with Trent going up to Ted in the pub to ask for a quote. At the beginning of this scene, right before Trent shows up, Mae says to Ted "If music be the food of love, play on, give me excess of it", which is the opening line to Shakespeare's romantic comedy Twelfth Night. In Twelfth Night, this line is said by Orsino, who is lamenting about a woman named Olivia, whom he loves but who doesn't love him back (I take this to be Ted and Michelle). Orsino then moves on and falls in love with Caesario, a man who is actually a woman called Viola disguised as a man. To cut a long story short, the relationship between Orsino and Viola/Caesario is considered to be a homosexual love story. Bear in mind that lines in this show are rarely said for no reason, and that this line serves no other purpose (and frankly seems a little out of place) than to hint at a romance between Ted and Trent.

Casablanca

At the beginning of the same scene, when Trent sees Ted, he says "Of all the pub joints!". This is a reference to the line "Of all the gin joints in the world, she walks into mine" from Casablanca. As well as this, episode 8 of season 3 is titled “We’ll Never Have Paris”, another reference to Casablanca (although so far some of the suspected titles have been slightly different from the actual title). Casablanca is, of course, an incredibly famous (perhaps the most famous?) romance movie, and it’s interesting to me that not only does it get referenced in a scene between Ted and Trent but it comes up again in season 3.

Also to note: Raja Casablanca is the name of the football club Edwin Akufo invites Sam to join in season 2. Because of this, some people have speculated that the episode title’s reference to Casablanca is actually meant to link back to Sam. I find this unlikely though, as the episode preceding it is titled “Ola’s”, which is the name of Sam’s restaurant, so it would be unlikely to have two Sam-centric episodes in a row.

Trent’s Date

On the same scene of season 2 (we got a LOT from that scene...), we see Trent leaving someone at the door. Many people have speculated that this is his partner or someone he’s dating, which is very likely when you consider Trent’s not-very-platonic tone and way of touching the man. An interesting detail about the man Trent was dating is that he has a moustache, much like someone else we know… 🤨🤨

Higgins

In 2x05 Higgins describes to Rebecca how the first time he met his wife, he embarrassed himself by spilling beer all over himself, and the first time Ted and Trent interact, Ted also embarrasses himself by spitting water everywhere.

Similarities between Trent and Rebecca

There are quite a few similarities between Trent and Rebecca- they’re both very icy to Ted in the beginning, are won over through food (Rebecca through the biscuits, Trent over spicy Indian food), are almost the exact same age according to the pilot script, have strangely similar hair, and the only people Ted makes biscuits for on the show are Rebecca and Trent’s daughter. As well as this, in 1x03 Ted says to Trent “Watch your back, Gay Talese there’s a new iconic profile about to be typed up by one Trent Crimm” then in 1x09 Ted says to Rebecca “Watch your back, Kate Moss there’s a new bad girl on the British modelling scene”.  I believe this is a way of twisting the expectation that Rebecca and Ted are going to end up together to have Ted end up with someone similar, but not who people expect.

Final scene of season 2

Ted’s final scene in the whole of season 2 is him with Trent, which is especially interesting as this scene is sandwiched between scenes about the other major romances on the show (the scenes go Rebecca and Sam, then Ted and Trent, then Roy and Keeley). The significance of Ted’s last scene of the whole of season 2 being with Trent can’t really be overstated. Ted Lasso is a show that loves its parallels, and it would’ve been satisfying to have both season 1 and 2 end with Ted and Rebecca having a debrief about the season in her office, but season 2 instead breaks this expectation by having the scene between Ted and Trent after this.

Trailer/last episode release dates

The trailer for season 3 was released on Valentine’s Day, which was likely a deliberate choice hinting that this season will include more romance. As well as this, the last episode airs the day before pride month, which, although less likely to be deliberate, is also an… interesting coincidence.

The Trent trailer

In the run-up to season 3, Apple TV released a sort of trailer/teaser thing on their website featuring Trent narrating the events of early season 1. This is a very strange video- it was released shortly before season 3 but doesn’t contain any new footage apart from Trent’s voiceover and a couple of shots of Trent’s desk, so it’s not really a trailer. It’s also not a summary- it doesn’t contain any information about season 2, or even the events of season 1. It’s also not spoiler-free though- it includes many shots from late season 2 that give away the plot and even has Trent sign off as “Trent Crimm, independent”. So what on earth was this video made for? And why is it displayed on the website with this photo, of all things, as the icon?

I don’t have the answers to those questions. But what I can say is that this video gives off very rom-com journalist falls for main character vibes. And seems to exist for no other reason than to have Trent wax lyrical about Ted for 3 minutes.

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

In their last scene of season 2, Trent tells Ted that he doesn't know how to ride a bike, which seems to me to be a very deliberate hint that at some point in the series we’ll get him learning to ride. We know episode 6 is set in Amsterdam, aka the bike capital of the world, and during this episode the song Raindrops Keep Fallin’ on My Head plays, which also plays during a bicycle riding scene in the movie Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. As well as this, Paul Newman and Robert Redford, who play the titular characters of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, are referenced in 3x03 and 3x04, respectively, so it would make a lot of sense for episode 6 to have a romantic bike riding scene referencing the film, definitely with Trent in and most likely with Ted there too. On top of this, the film has a lot of queer subtext, which makes it all the more interesting that it’s referenced in season 3 and most likely referenced in a scene between Ted and Trent. Thanks to @crimmcast for bringing this connection to my attention!

11:11 wishes

At the beginning of 3x02, Ted states that 11:11 is his wishing time, and then at exactly 11:11 in the episode, Ted says "Trent Crimm is writing a book about us". While I don't think Ted wished for Trent to write a book about the club since he already knew that was happening, I think that between this and Trent being in the scene where Ted first talks about his 11:11 wishing tradition, Ted’s wishes and Trent are somehow connected. Thanks to this post for pointing this out!

"Goodnight Sport"

Ted says this to Trent at the end of 3x02, and it's significant for a few reasons. Firstly, Ted gives other members of the Diamond Dogs nicknames such as "sweetheart", so this cements Trent's place as part of the group. Secondly, in the scene preceding this, they talk about how sport is an excellent metaphor, after Roy uses it as a metaphor for his relationship with Keeley. This means that, having just used sport as a metaphor for relationships and love, Ted then chooses to apply this word to Trent. Thirdly is the connection to The Great Gatsby, in which Gatsby frequently refers to Nick as “old sport”, with the relationship between Gatsby and Nick often considered to be queer coded.

La Cage aux Folles

Shortly after the first episode of season 3 aired, Apple Music released the playlist, which included all the songs in order in season 3. The final song on the playlist was I am what I am, which is the last song of Act 1 of La Cage aux Folles. La Cage is a musical about a gay couple who run a nightclub, and this song is about Albin refusing to hide his sexuality and go back into the closet. It’s the final song of the show, so if this season follows the precedent set by the previous two and closes with the same character it started with, this song will play over a scene with Ted in it. Apple has recently removed all the songs from the Ted Lasso Season 3 playlist from episodes we have yet to see, which indicates that the playlist probably includes spoilers, which this song, if it’s used as expected, definitely counts as. I’ve seen some people express worries that I am what I am will be misused and that the writers/showrunners may not understand the significance of the song to the queer community and end up using it to express Ted’s acceptance of his mental health or something similar. I severely doubt this- I don’t think a show like Ted Lasso, which so carefully puts in lines that hint at things that happen several seasons later (think the way Roy’s anger at Trent was laid out from the start of season 1), would be so blind as to overlook the cultural significance of the final song used in probably the entire show.

The songs get more romantic after Amsterdam

The songs get considerably more romantic after the Amsterdam episode, and although this could technically be for other couples on the show, it’s a CONSIDERABLE increase—over half the songs post-Amsterdam are romantic, which leads me to believe that Ted either gets into a relationship or things ramp up romantically during/after Amsterdam. Technically, this piece of evidence isn't specifically for Tedependent, but more for Ted having some sort of relationship in S3.

The infamous James Lance interview

These are some quotes from an interview James Lance did after season 2 had just finished airing. I try not to read too much into what actors say in interviews as it can easily be misinterpreted, but his insistence that there’s “something there” in the way Trent looks at Ted as well as that there is something about Trent, to do with Ted, that is yet to be revealed in season 3 is certainly intriguing. He also refuses to answer whether Trent is gay or not. I feel like this is most likely because if viewers knew about Trent’s sexuality, the Colin outing storyline would not be as compelling, as knowing for sure that Trent is gay would essentially rule out him outing Colin.

Season 3 is far more queer than the previous seasons

Season 3 is considerably more queer than the seasons before it, and not just because of the Colin storyline. Concepts like changing your name being integrated into episodes (although I hate Zava and have a lot of opinions about the Zoreaux/Van Damme storyline), Zava’s line about gender being a construct, and even Ted correcting Rebecca about West Ham in the first episode (which, although Ted is technically correcting her on using they/them as a plural pronoun and not singular, is still very queer coded) all make this season have a lot more queer undertones. As well as this, Ted has had multiple… suspicious lines this season. His comment in episode one about the “muscular thighs” of rugby players, telling Beard/Roy to “just KISS”- Ted this season so far has been far more overtly queer coded than in previous seasons.

Height as a metaphor for masculinity

This point isn’t entirely about Ted and Trent themselves, but rather an interesting thought I had about the season’s portrayal of height so far. We’ve had both Ted and Trent comment on other men’s heights—"He’s tall" and "You’re tall" respectively—as well as Nate, whose masculinity was constantly undermined throughout his time at Richmond seen struggling to reach the believe poster. Both Beard and Roy laugh at Nate’s struggles, two men who are confident in their own masculinity, but Ted and Trent do not, as men who, in Ted’s words, have had “guys underestimating me my entire life”. Neither Ted nor Trent are particularly short, and their comments about other men’s heights seem a little out of place, but they are both unconventionally masculine, and the men they direct these comments to are the opposite—Zava in particular, as a successful football player, is masculine in the most typical sense. Taking these lines as nods to Ted and Trent’s unconventional masculinity also makes them queer coded, with non-typical presentations of masculinity often synonymous with queer men.

Unconventional families

A big theme in the whole show is family, particularly found family, but this season doubles down on that with the idea of unconventional families coming up a few times in the first few episodes. Ted tells Michelle that "I love our family, no matter what it looks like", and there's also Higgins' joke about the boy and his father, which elicits a few responses about different unconventional families (gay, sperm donor). As well as this, in this interview, Jason talks about Ted finding “another way to go about living this life” and the idea of moving away from the nuclear family structure, which is all very interesting. 🤔🤔

The House in the Cerulean Sea

As I said earlier, I try not to reference things the actors/creators of the show say or do on social media too much because there’s often a big scope for misinterpreting or reading too much into things. That being said, when Jason Sudeikis likes a tweet comparing Ted Lasso to my favourite book ever, I can’t not say something about it! Because wow was that a moment. Embarrassingly, I somehow never noticed the connections between two of my favourite pieces of media until I thought more about it after seeing this tweet, but WOW, are there connections. I’ll try to give as spoiler-free a synopsis as I can… Linus Baker, the main character, is trapped in a morally dubious job that he tells himself is important and something he enjoys, until he gets sent to observe and report on an orphanage run by Arthur Parnassus, who’s very Ted-coded and shows Linus kindness that he’s never encountered before, making him think more about who he is and what he’s doing with his life. If the Trent connections aren’t already blaringly obvious, consider the way Linus starts the story as an observer and over time slowly becomes a part of the narrative. I’ll stop there because I don’t want to get carried away and give spoilers, but the whole book is SO Ted Lasso coded! (Not just in the relationship between Linus and Arthur, but literally the whole book) I really encourage everyone to read it. Also, um… did I mention? It’s basically a slow-burn queer love story between Linus and Arthur.

The Kinks

In 3x02, we get Trent entering the clubhouse to the tune of A Well Respected Man by The Kinks. Later in the show, around episode 11, Strangers plays, which is another Kinks song. This is a romantic song, and considering the Kinks are already connected to Trent through his entrance in episode 2, this song could be used for a moment between Ted and Trent.

Robert Redford

After Trent shows the coaches the security footage of Nate ripping the believe sign, Ted says to him “May a young Robert Redford portray you in a film someday”, and Trent responds, “Probably Dustin Hoffman”. This is in reference to All the President’s Men, a film about journalists uncovering the Watergate scandal, where Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman play the main two journalists of the film. The strange thing about this line is that Ted decides to compare Trent to Robert Redford, pictured here on the right, despite him clearly looking much more like Dustin Hoffman, especially with the hair. By comparing Trent to Robert Redford, Ted is essentially saying “Hey, I think this incredibly attractive man should play you in a movie!”. And if that isn’t a gay thing to say, I don’t know what is.

PART 2 - Conclusion

I’ve talked almost exclusively so far in this post about connections between specific lines and other character’s arcs/pop culture references and mostly avoided analysing the chemistry and compatibility between Ted and Trent themselves. This is because I wanted to present as solid evidence as I could, and things like romantic glances are far more subjective and up for interpretation. Something that can seem romantic to one person can be seen as completely platonic by someone else. That being said, I do think the two of them have a lot of chemistry, and their arcs fit together so well: Ted as someone who often hides his feelings and puts on a mask of positivity, and Trent as someone who can see through people’s masks and get to what they really mean. They have had a few romantic moments as well: their last scene of season 2, as well as at the end of 3x02, which both contain lingering looks, and the latter is literally overlaid with a romantic song. As well as this, they just get each other; Trent understands and responds accordingly to every single reference Ted throws at him, and he even enjoys his puns (in contrast to Sassy’s denial of Ted in which she cites his “dreadful puns”). The two of them work so well together, and it would be so beautiful to see a queer middle-aged love story, especially if it tells the story of discovering your sexuality later in life.

The idea of Nate’s downfall was hinted at in season 1 with a few lines and subtle moments, not enough for a casual viewer to notice the first time around but just enough to see it clearly laid out on a retrospective rewatch. We have a lot of season 3 left to go, and a lot of reveals are still yet to be… revealed, likely ones that will be just as surprising as Nate’s downfall was but will, like Nate’s arc, have had just as much subtle set up. Set up like referencing Shakespearian romantic comedies, or building up the idea of wishes at 11:11, or references to unconventional families, or drawing parallels between one relationship and another, or slowly introducing more queer concepts into the show, or referencing one of the most famous romantic drama movies of all time, or—you get the gist. No one can say for sure whether Tedependent will become canon, but it’s undoubtable that the setup is there. Whether the show will actually have the balls to go for it... only time will tell.

Thank you for reading :)

Before I go... In no particular order a huge thank you to @thedanceronthestreets, @crenttrimm, @garaksrod, @firefam, @mandiffe, @wrong-energy, @ishouldbedoingalright and @strawberryswords (as well as others I've probably missed!!) tysm for listening to my delusions and sharing all of your own <3

[willalove75]

Can I have protective Rebecca welton x reader where perhaps the reader and Rebecca are together and maybe they r at the bar and some creepy guy is harassing the reader and Rebecca gets rlly protective and punches the guy and maybe the reader gets rlly annoyed because Rebecca makes a scene so she storms outside and they have a fight and then they go home and go to bed angry and the next morning the reader apologies bc she/they realise Rebecca was just trying to protect her and they make up. Tysm !!!! ❤️🤍

Yes!! I love this! Thanks so much for the request!💕

TW: Handsy, creepy, drunk middle aged dude, lesbian slur.

You and your girlfriend Rebecca walk hand-in-hand down the street, you laugh and chat about the double date you just went on with Keeley and Roy. You head towards your flat when you pass one of the bars you frequent.

"Hey," you say stopping in front of it "what about a nightcap?"

"Yeah, why not. Is this place any good?"

"Well no one compares to Mae, but it's pretty good. Some of the guys that come in here are, shitty, but overall I like it here."

Rebecca raises an eyebrow at you.

"Shitty how?"

"You know, the usual middle-aged man that's out drinking by himself and is a little, creepy" Rebecca gives you a look "It's only happened once! Come on." As you pull her into the bar.

You both take a seat at the bar and order drinks. The bar is a little loud so you both lean in to each other to hear one another while you sip on your drinks. You chat and laugh as the second round comes out.

"I gotta pee, I'll be right back." You say as you get up.

You walk towards the bathroom; before you turn down the hall you feel someone grab your ass. You spin around and see a balding, middle-aged man. He sits back against the bar with a smirk on his face and a beer in his hands.

"Oi the things I'd do to that ass if you'd let me take you home." He says, just barely slurring his words.

"EW?" You say to him and go to turn around.

Out of the corner of your eye you see his hand reaching for you again, you spin around and grab him by the wrists and dig your nails into his arm.

"OW OW OW" He yells.

"I swear to god if you ever touch me again it will be the last thing you ever do. Got it?"

The man tries to get out of your grip but you dig your nails harder into his skin and draw a little blood.

"Got it?" You say, looking straight into his eyes with daggers in yours.

"Yeah I got it I got it let go of me!!"

You throw his wrist away and walk into the bathroom. You didn't notice but Rebecca saw a little of the interaction and looks concerned when you walk back.

"What was that? Are you okay?" She says with concern in her eyes.

"I'm fine baby," you say as you bring your hand to the back of her neck and stroke her cheek with your thumb to comfort her. "It was nothing, just some creepy drunk dude, being a creepy drunk dude. It's fine I handled it."

She looks over at the guy with a little fear, but mostly anger in her eyes.

"Hey," you say as you pull her back to your attention. "It's fine, I said I handled it, don't worry love."

She cups your face in her hand.

"Are you sure?" She says with worry in her eyes.

"Yes baby, I promise." You lean in and kiss her and you feel her relax. You pull away and look into her eyes "Okay?"

"Okay." She says softly.

You give her another quick kiss and you go back to your drinks and conversation. You both have another drink and you accidentally knock your jacket onto the floor. You hop off of the barstool and bend down to pick it back up. You turn to put it back on the hook under the bar and you feel another grab. You turn around and see the man again, just as pleased with himself as he was before.

"What did I fucking tell you-" You begin to say

"Are you FUCKING kidding me?!" You hear Rebecca yell. You look over and see her face, you don't think she's ever been this angry before. If looks could kill, this man would be dead where he stood.

"Baby-" You try to calm her down and you pull her face towards you "just ignore him" you say with pleading eyes.

She rips her face out of your hand and goes to yell at the man again.

"Oi would ya look at that, a couple of dykes, what I'd give to take the both of ya home. I'd set you straight right quick!" He laughs at his drunk buddies that laugh along with him.

You look over at Rebecca and you see something snap inside of her, the room slows down, Rebecca gets off of her stool and your try to grab her arm but she rips it away from you.

"Baby!" You yell at her.

Rebecca stands up, towering over the man, and starts screaming at him. You feel like everything is in slow motion, you notice the bar fall silent as she rips him a new one, shoving her finger in his face. She continues to yell at him, he's a little frightened, but the liquid courage flowing in his veins keeps him there, yelling back at her. You turn your head to see people looking at the three of you, watching the commotion. You look back at Rebecca and she's still screaming at him. Suddenly the slow motion ends and you hear her yelling at him.

"HOW FUCKING DARE YOU TOUCH HER. WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE YOU TWAT. YOU COULDN'T GET A WOMAN TO SLEEP WITH YOU EVEN IF YOU PAID HER. YOU BETTER FUCKING APOLOGIZE TO HER RIGHT NOW" She yells and points at you.

You feel everyone's eyes shift to you and the room slows down again.

"Rebecca please!!!" You yell as tears start to fall from your eyes.

The man gets up into Rebecca's face. "No wonder your husband cheated on you so much, he didn't want to deal with your fucking crazy ass."

He spits down onto her shoes and goes to turn around, you look at Rebecca's face, suddenly calm, but in a terrifying way. You look down and see Rebecca's fist in a ball. You go to reach for her and the slow motion ends. Before the man is able to turn around Rebecca's arm goes flying, her fist making contact with his jaw, he falls to the ground.

"NO!" You yell

The bar erupts into chaos as people try to separate the two of them. The man tries to get up and fight back when a group of guys grab him and throw him out of the bar. Your eyes darting across the bar, everyone is yelling, either at the man or at Rebecca. You feel a panic build up in your chest as you look around the room.

You feel hands on your shoulders and look up, you see Rebecca looking down at you.

"Honey are you okay?"

"I told you to leave it alone!!!!" You yell at her. You quickly grab your stuff and run out of the bar.

Rebecca stands there in shock and confusion. She quickly pulls out cash and throws it on the bar and runs out after you.

"y/n!!!" She yells as you hear her heels on the pavement heading towards you.

Your run slows to a walk and you stop to catch your breath, the panic still in your chest and your head is spinning.

"Y/n!" Rebecca says as she catches up "What the fuck?!"

"I told you to ignore him!!!" You yell as you walk towards your flat.

"Are you kidding me? How was I supposed to ignore that?!"

You pull your keys out and unlock the door. You walk in and try to slam the door but Rebecca stops it.

"What's wrong with you?!" She yells as she walks in and closes the door behind her. "I defend you and you get mad at me?!"

"I didn't need you to defend me!!" You yell back "I told you to leave it alone and you didn't!! You fucking punched him!!"

Rebecca looks at you with hurt and confusion on her face.

"I shouldn't have hit him." She says looking down at her hand, her knuckles still red. "But I couldn't let him get away with harassing you!!"

"You should have!!" You yell, your breathing labored, the panic still in your chest.

Rebecca looks at you, her eyes shift from hurt to concern.

"Love," She says as she takes a step towards you.

"NO!" You yell and take a step back. You stand there for a second and head into the bedroom and slam the door.

"Honey," She says and walks to the door and goes to grab the handle. You hear her walking towards the door and you lock it before she's able to open it.

She hears the door lock and gently tries the handle.

"Y/n," she says through the door. "Love please open the door."

She stands there for a minute before walking away. You rip off your dress and throw on pajamas. Frustrated, you pull out a makeup wipe and drag it across your face and crawl into bed. Your heartbeat slows as your breathing returns to normal. The panic in your chest subsides and you can finally breathe again. You try to see if you can hear Rebecca in the house and without even realizing it, you're asleep.

You wake up the next morning to the sun shining into your window, you hear birds chirping, and you're greeted with a wicked headache. You think back on the events of the night, things seem fuzzy even though you didn't drink that much. You remember the guy at the bar and you remember Rebecca decking him. You remember feeling like you were drowning during the chaos and you remember what happened when you got home. Guilt fills your stomach as tears start to form in your eyes. You were horrible to her, but she was just protecting you.

You get out of bed and go to open the door and realize you locked it, you unlock it and walk out into your flat. You look around, afraid that she left and desperately hoping she's still here. You see her shoes tossed aside on the floor and you sigh a breath of relief. You walk into the kitchen and see her sitting at the table with a cup of tea in her hands. There's a little bit of makeup under her eyes, her hair is in a messy ponytail and she's still wearing the same dress from last night.

"Hey" you say sheepishly as you walk into the kitchen.

She looks up at you as you walk towards her "Good morning"

"You're still in the same outfit?" You ask as you sit down at the table with her.

"Well the door was locked so I didn't have much of a choice" she replies flatly.

You close your eyes and furrow your brows, you forgot, again, that you locked her out. You slowly open your eyes and look up to meet hers.

"I'm sorry." You say as your eyes start to glimmer as tears form on your waterline. You look down and see her hand holding the tea cup, her knuckles still a little red with a small bruises where her rings laid when she decked him.

You look down, ashamed of how you treated her, she protected you from some creep and in return, you were a raging bitch to her. You look back up and meet her eyes, you're surprised that she doesn't have anger in her eyes, she should by the way you treated her. Instead, you see hurt and concern.

"I am so sorry babe" you say as you rest your hand on her arm. "All you did was protect me and I-" you look down and start to cry "I was fucking horrible to you. And I don't know why. I'm so, so sorry."

She puts her tea cup down and grabs one of your hands and wipes away your tears with the other.

"What happened?" She asks, leaning into you.

"I don't know, the whole bar went into slow motion and I had this like, horrific feeling in my chest and everyone was looking at us and I wanted it to stop but I couldn't make it stop and-" you break down and cry more. "I don't know, I just fucking freaked out. And I took it out on you and I don't know why because you didn't deserve it and-"

You're interrupted by Rebecca as she gets up out of her chair and wraps her arms around you and pulls your head into her chest.

"Shhhh, it's okay." She says lovingly as she strokes your hair and kisses the top of your head. You begin to sob into her, she guides you up and into the living room. You both sit on the couch, her arms still wrapped tightly around you. She gently rocks you back and fourth as you cry. She continues to kiss your head and stoke your hair. "It's okay love, you're okay." She whispers to you.

You're able to collect yourself a little and look up at her, she places a kiss on your forehead and hugs you tighter. You wipe the tears from your eyes and sit up facing her. You look into her loving eyes, not a hint of anger or frustration behind them, you're amazed given how shitty you were to her last night. If the roles were reversed, you'd be pissed right now.

"Why aren't you mad at me? I was so shitty to you, you should be pissed at me right now!"

She gently brushes your hair out of your face. "Oh I was, if that's any consolation." she chuckles "but I get it now, baby, you were having a panic attack." She holds your face and looks into your eyes. You look back into hers, a little confused.

"Is that what that was?" You ask.

"I think so, you said you had a bad feeling in your chest, right?" You nod to confirm. "The whole room slowed down, you felt completely out of control?" You nod again, tears filling back up in your eyes. "That sounds like a panic attack to me. But it's okay, what happened was insane and I'm sure me punching that twat in the jaw probably didn't help - even though he did deserve it." She says with a smirk. You chuckle a little and hold her hand. You turn her hand over to look at her knuckles, you can see the bruises from her rings more clearly and you put your other hand over hers.

"Hey," she says and she lifts your chin up towards her "it's okay love, I'm fine. I'm not hurt and I'm not mad at you, I promise."

You wipe more tears from you eyes and look back down at her hand.

"Have you iced this yet?"

"Yes, I actually meant to tell you, I fell asleep with a bag of frozen vegetables on my hand so I had to throw them in the bin when I woke up." She says with a small chuckle. "I'll buy you more, I promise."

You laugh "No it's okay, they've been in there forever anyway. I don't even know why I bought them." You take a deep breath and look into her eyes. "Thank you." You lean into her and bury your face into her neck as you wrap your arms around each other. "Is there anything I can do to make up for me being shitty to you?" You ask as you pull back and look at her.

"Well you could let me wash up, I feel foul."

You both chuckle as you grab her hand.

"Okay, come on."

You lead her through your bedroom into the master bathroom. You close the door and turn the shower on and let it run for a minute. Rebecca grabs a makeup wipe and removes what's left of her makeup from last night. She goes to reach for the zipper on the back of her dress and you gently reach up and pull it down as she looks on over her shoulder. Her dress slides off her shoulders and down her waist, she pulls it over her hips and it falls to the floor. You reach up and unclip her bra, the straps slip down and she pulls it off. You put your hands on her hips and place gentle kisses across her back. You stand up on your tip toes to get as close to her neck as you can. She grabs your hand and pulls you in front of her with your back to the countertop. You go back to kissing across her collarbones and up her neck as she leans into you. She pulls your pajama shirt over your head and you pull your hair down. She slides her hand to the back of your head and pulls you in for a passionate kiss. Her soft skin pressed against yours, she places her other hand on your waist and holds you close. The steam starts to build from the hot shower as you part, she pulls off her underwear as you pull off the rest of your clothes and she leads you into the shower.

The hot water cascades down her body as she steps underneath it. She runs her hands through her hair, getting it properly soaked. You can't help but stare at her, she looks like an angel, her perfect hour glass figure, the water running over her breasts, down her belly to her feet. She opens her eyes and sees you looking at her and smirks.

"What?"

"Nothing, it's just- you're amazing. Everything about you is amazing."

She smiles and takes a step towards you, her wet hands hold your face as she looks down at you, water droplets run down her face, her green eyes look so beautiful as she looks into yours. She pulls you into a kiss, her wet lips meeting yours. You put your hands on her hips as you lean back against the wall. She pulls away and gently bites her lip and smiles at you. You switch place and get your hair wet, Rebecca grabs her puff and gets it soapy, she brushes it across her body, lathering herself. She drags it across her shoulders and you take it from her hands and gently wash her back. She sighs and her head leans back. You drag the puff down her shoulders to her lower back in small circles, you bring it further and rub it across her perfect ass and giggle.

"Hey" she says with a laugh as she looks back at you.

You switch spots as she rinses off and you lather yourself up and wash. She shampoos and conditions her hair when you rinse and you grab your shampoo. You squirt the shampoo into your palm, rub your hands together and scrub it into your scalp. You feel a second set of hands massaging the shampoo into your head and you let out a sigh. You drop your hands as Rebecca gently runs her fingers through your hair, thoroughly washing it . Once she's satisfied, she takes the shower head and rinses the soap out of your hair. She grabs your conditioner, puts some into her hands and gently runs her fingers through your hair. She picks up your brush and gently brushes the conditioner through your hair, softly detangling any knots she comes across. She rinses your hair once more and you turn to face her, you pull her close and place your lips against hers. You come up on your tip toes and wrap your arms around her neck as she wraps her strong arms around your waist. You slowly kiss her as the water runs over and between your bodies, pressed up against each other. The hot water soothes the both of you as you feel the stress from last night wash away down the drain. The kiss ends and you stare into each others eyes for a moment.

"You ready?" She asks

"Yeah, I guess." You say reluctantly, not wanting to leave the warmth.

Rebecca turns off the taps and you step out and dry yourself off, wrap your towel around yourself and plop your hair up with your hair towel. Rebecca gets out, dries herself off and pulls her bathrobe over her shoulders and fastens it around her waist.

You walk out of the bathroom into the bedroom, you climb into the bed and pat the spot next to you for her to lay next to you. She walks over and lays next to you. You run your fingers through her wet hair, looking into her beautiful eyes. Even without makeup, she's the prettiest woman you've ever seen. She kisses you softly and pulls you into her. You rest your head on her chest and listen to her heartbeat. You both peacefully drift off to sleep in each others arms.

[schlong2]

hey was the human at the beginning of Kingdom that scared the shit out of Noa in the fish house supposed to be Mae? and did Noa know that?

because i never see people talk about the fact that she was the reason he broke his fucking egg. the egg he went to top nest for, that would make his father proud and be the next big step in his life. the broken egg that he had to replace, leading him to discover the murdered eagle clan patrol. that led to his horse being in the spot it was when more of Proximus' guys showed up. that led them right back to Noa's clan.

like Mae was just trying to eat and survive. but from Noa's pov, i think he would've connected the dots and blamed her a bit more for everything that went down. he just kind of acts mildly annoyed at her presence (before she speaks, mind you) like she's any other echo, so he probably didn't recognize her because all echoes look the same to him. if i were to break my super important egg because a fucking squirrel or raccoon scared the shit out of me, my ass would NOT recognize that thing. especially because its really dark (do apes have better night vision than humans??) and he gets like a glimspe of her before she scurries away.

also interesting that there were initially not enough eggs for all three of them in the first nest. that Noa went out of his way to get another, that ended up broken anyway. you're supposed to pick the one that "sings" to you, but Noa didn't get that choice. which is maybe why it ended up broken. like it was never meant to be his really, that he was always meant to end up with Sun. (Anaya and Soona's eggs were broken too in the raid but whateva)

i just love that. if Mae's desperation was what inadvertently lead to Noa's broken egg and ultimately the pillaging of eagle clan, i fucking love that. because it foreshadows what she means to do later with the flood. also out of desperation.

[ghoultrifle]

Ghost on Taskmaster !!

Copia is Alex Horne and you cannot convince me otherwise. Awkward rat boy who's subservient to his master? Yeah, rings a bell.

Honestly I don't think any of the papas have the right vibes to be the taskmaster, in my mind it's Omega. Big, strong, kinda mean and takes no shit.

Okay now here's my ghoul-by-ghoul analysis on what kind of contestant they'd be and which past contestant i'd compare them to !!

Aether - Definitely a Jo Brand or Julian Clary. Couldn't give less of a shit, just here for the free food tbh. Will occasionally try but can't be fucked to do anything physical. Everyone loves him for it, too.

Cirrus - Kiell Smith-Bynoe. Ultra competitive, has beef with another contestant (Rain). Effortlessy hilarious in everything she does.

Aurora - Charlotte Ritchie. Dressed appropriately (dungarees). Tries really hard but doesn't always succeed. Very optimistic though :)

Mountain - A mix of Bob Mortimer and Mark Watson. He's a prize task extraordinaire with hundreds of unbelievable (but true) stories. Will also get bullied by the Taskmaster though.

Phantom - Lucy Beaumont and Judi Love vibes. Just doesn't seem to understand what the fuck is going on at any point. A good laugh though and will always fight for points.

Sunny - James Acaster. She's chaos incarnate ("My eyes are circles?"). You think it's a character but as time goes on you begin to question that assumption ajskldfkh.

Rain - Mae Martin. Gay and good at it. No notes.

Cumulus - Al Murray. She's focused but also really cheeky. Always looking for loopholes. Will throw money at the tasks like it's nobody's business.

Dewdrop - Nish Kumar or Katherine Parkinson. People think he's going to be a half decent contestant, but he's actually incredibly shit at everything. Gets annoyed frequently.

Swiss - Ed Gamble. Once again very competitive and will throw a fit if he doesn't win. Can also laugh at himself but secretly dies inside when he does badly on a task. A great podcast host for the after-show interviews.

tagging people who expressed even the tiniest bit of interest so this incredibly niche post doesn't flop @sphylor, @thesunhatesme, @chapel-of-rizztual, @ghouletteanon, @cheerycherrycandy-resurrected, @mikorsghouls

Thank you for listening, have some homoeroticism :)

[mageofseven]

The Boys' Opinions on MC's Dog

Same premise as the one with the cat, but this time with my sweet furbaby Elsa~

This is Elsa, my babygirl 🥰

I adopted her a few years back during a time of heavy depression and she has boosted me up for the better.

She is a chihuahua mix (or so the people I adopted from guessed; their other guess was a terrier mix) and was found wandering the streets. They think she escaped her previous owner's backyard, but aren't sure because no one came looking for her. I adopted her when she was one and a half.

Before anyone asks though, I will explain about her eyes. Those pinky red spots are her tear ducts, as I was told. We call them her cherry eyes and she's had them since I adopted her. I've talked about them with the vet and the lady said they don't hurt her or anything of the sort; they just sorta look strange when they pop out like this.

There is a surgery to fix it, but it's was too expensive and then she might have to have eye drops in her eyes for the rest of her life (and she hates eye drops a lot). Overall, I feel like it would cause her more harm than good to do it anyway.

I made sure explain this because I've literally had people (both irl and through me messaging them her picture) react like "Dear god, what is wrong with her eyes!!!" And it's like chill dude and stop insulting my dog.

She's still a beautiful and sweet little girl 🥰💕

So yeah! She's fine so there's no need to worry about the cherry eyes. She is however partially blind in one eye, but that is because...well, she dislikes cats and in the beginning of taking care of her brother Beanie, she wasn't his biggest fan. One day she had him cornered, he swatted her, and I had a $300 vet bill on my hands.

She is a sweet girl though! She just thinks she's bigger and tougher than she actually is. I call her my little Gryffindor sometimes lol.

Elsa's other names: Elsa Mae, Babygirl, Baby Love, Little Love, Baby Angel, Sweet Girl, and Little Bitch (jokingly since the non cuss word meaning of bitch is female dog and she's little, hence little bitch lol)

And lastly

The Queen 👑 hehe~

Now let's see how the Boys' handle her! She is quite needy so let's see how this goes hehe.

•▪︎▪︎◇°●♡●°◇▪︎▪︎•

Lucifer:

Was honest less reluctant than he was in Beanie's timeline.

Lucifer preferred big dogs (evident by Cerberus), but believed small dogs have their own charms.

Elsa was just this little helpless girl and he quickly grew a soft spot for her.

She was bit annoying though since she was always crying about something

But she was easy to soothe and the pride demon did enjoy holding her close and comforting her

Once she got used to him at least.

In truth, Elsa is scared of men, something we guess to be a part of a past trauma, either from when she was on the streets or because her first owner treated her poorly.

Because of this, it takes her awhile to feel safe with any man

But Lucifer is very patient and soft with her and he soon becomes one of her favorite people.

She can often be found on his lap as he does paperwork and will gently distract him from his work with a nudge of her nose to his arm.

Though it was annoying to him at first, those brief periods of having to stop his work for a moment to pet the needy furbaby actually did wonders for his stress.

Overall, he finds Elsa slightly tiring, but very sweet and enjoys the comfort she gives him.

Mammon:

This dude likes making fun of the dog

And gets smacked by MC on the arm or back of the head every time they hear him say anything mean.

In truth, he does like the chubby little thing.

Elsa's cries for attention always make this need dude feel needed and that's a feeling Mammon really wishes he felt more.

He pretends to find her annoying, but in truth grows to love her.

Some nights he'll try to steal the pup from her mama's (MC's) bed just for the dog to turn on him and bark still the whole house knows he's doing shit.

Will sometimes bribe her with food to try to get Elsa to choose him over his other brothers and it will usually work since she's so food driven.

Overall, Elsa makes this man feel important and gets Mammon addicted to the feeling.

Leviathan:

This dog knows how to make him feel guilty and he hates it.

He can't even eat a meal without her staring at him.

Feels like she thinks he's some monster who would starve her just 'cause he eats his own food.

Elsa's big eyes are good at this so it's not just Levi.

The envy demon also hates when she tries to come into his room.

Levi isn't worried she'll mess with his stuff or anything like that since she's such a good dog.

However, his room is stuffed with things that could crush the tiny girl if they fell

And this man has too much anxiety to chance it

So instead she cries outside his bedroom till eventually she fall asleep against his door.

Almost stepped on her while leaving his room once and this dude still hasn't forgiven himself.

Overall is very anxious about her size and just tries to distance himself from what he sees as an incredibly fragile little thing.

Satan:

This man is a cat lover; we all know this.

Still, he treats Elsa nice enough.

Will sometimes have to excuse himself when she cries too much.

It really gets on his nerves and the Avatar of Wrath knows his limits at this point.

Will pet her and call her a good girl, but that is the extent of his interactions with her.

Another brother worried about Elsa coming into their room.

Satan has so many books and many cursed books.

The poor girl could get severely hurt if a pile fell on her

And there's always the risk of a curse one touching her and then Satan will have to explain to MC why her precious pup is now a baby chick or something like that.

It's just safer to keep her out.

Overall, Satan is good to her, but overall disinterested.

Asmodeus:

Omg she's too perfect!!!

Gushes over the furbaby and spoils her with love.

Will refuse to let her on his lap if she's been outside recently though; Elsa has dirtied his clothes like this in the past and it upset the lust demon when his favorite pants got mud on them.

Is usually the brother ready to snuggle her when she cries.

Overall, Asmo loves Elsa very much and will always give her the affection she craves.

Beelzebub:

The man who can never put her down.

This dog just activates his Daddy instincts and he can't help but take care of her.

Is literally terrified of stepping on her; he is a big man and she is a tiny girl after all.

This is a part of why he holds her so much; if she's in his arms then she can never be hurt.

Plus hugging her makes him oh so happy 🥺💕

Is the brother that helps with most of Elsa's needs.

Beel will trim her nails for MC, despite Elsa's loud wails the entire time like she's being murdered (she hates her paws being touched). It hurts his heart, but he knows it's good for her.

Will sometimes help MC give her a bath, but not always.

Her cry is extra sad and pathetic, enough to break the hearts of anyone within hearing distance and it's too much for Beely 😢

Finds it funny afterwards when she refuses the towel and dries herself on the carpet (she rolls around and does a funny dancer essentially) while staring at MC with accusatory eyes.

Unfortunately, Beel is always one to sneak her food as well 😅

Elsa is a bit overweight and the vet wants her to lose some pounds but this girl is always hungry.

For obvious reasons, this man empathizes with her and can't help but sneak her some dog-safe food at times.

Overall, Beel fell in love. MC may be this dog's mama but he wants to be the daddy so bad.

Please MC 🥺👉👈

Belphegor:

Gets annoyed with her easily and can say some pretty mean things to her.

Belphie doesn't mean it though! Boy is just grouchy when woken up and Elsa tends to do that a lot.

She can't jump on beds by herself so cries and cries till she is finally placed on it.

Once the pup snuggles up with him to join him for his nap, the sloth demon immediately feels like an ass.

Belphie is also the one Elsa runs to when there's a thunderstorm.

She'll hide under the blankets with Belphie and he'll do his best to stay awake long enough to give the shaking dog some comfort.

Overall, likes her but gets annoyed by her a lot.

Diavolo:

This man gets so excited when MC brings Elsa to the castle!

Barb has zero chance of getting the prince to do work when the sweet pup visits with her mama lol

Honestly, this man is probably one of the few Elsa bonds with the quickest.

Dia is just so happy and showers her in love and treats (he always has an excuse for MC for why it's perfectly fine for Elsa to have so many treats 'just this once').

Elsa will literally run to this man the very second she sees him.

This little girl loves her 'Uncle Dia' so much (and boy, does Diavolo love being called that 🥰)

Barb takes the interruption to the prince's work schedule in stride

And even will uses it a motivator to get the man through his paperwork without staring out the window for like ten minutes at a time.

Will often make deals like 'like finish x amount of papers today and I will ask MC to bring Elsa tomorrow afternoon and bam, the work is done in lightning speed.

Elsa is more of a help than a hindrance to the prince's work so it all works out well 🥰🤭

Overall, Dia loves Elsa to bits and wishes she could visit more.

Barbatos:

Honestly, this man is no where near as close to Elsa as he was was with Beanie.

He finds Elsa cute and a good motivator for Diavolo, but a bit of a trouble maker.

Elsa doesn't quite understand what the Little Ds around the castle are, but assumes they are strange animals.

She'll snarl and try chasing the Little Ds, only for some to push her back or scare her off, resulting in her running to Barbatos and hiding behind his leg as she shakes.

This prompts Barb to frown and make a small sigh before kneeling down and comforting the scared pup.

Elsa causes problems for herself and expects help from the butler; this is no different from some people he knows and so he is used to it.

I'll admit, he never completely got over the time she tracked her muddy footprints all over the castle after being in the garden on a damp day, but blames MC more than he blames the ignorant pup.

Overall, Barb likes Elsa, but is less than thrilled about some aspects of her.

Solomon:

Honestly finds the dog precious.

It takes a while for Elsa to get familiar with him and not let her fear of men include him though.

Solomon was patient though and had no issues with waiting.

Didn't go out his way to bribe or force affection onto Elsa; just let time do its thing.

Even once the two started bonding, Elsa would bark every time he comes into House of Lamentation.

Solomon just laughs it off and say HoL has a pretty good security system now.

Despite the rather loud greeting, the dog always has to sit on his lap for a bit and will whine to rush him to sit down.

Overall, Solomon likes Elsa and thinks she's funny.

Simeon:

#1 pet sitter right here.

This angel sees Elsa as one of the most precious beings he's ever seen and is always up for pet sitting when need be.

Despite her fear of men, Elsa was never the least bit scared of Simeon.

Why that is, MC has no clue, but it definitely made some of the other men jealous in the beginning.

Just Simeon's name alone will make the dog run to the door and whine, making her think he's here to visit her.

His name becomes a trigger word the residents of HoL have to spell in order not to hype her up for disappointment

Just for Elsa to somehow associate the spoken letters of his name to his name and react the same.

How the hell is this dog so good at spelling???

(She legit is. Spell 'treat' around her and she will lose her shit; idk man she is too smart for her own good lol)

They literally just have to refer to him as 'the angel' when he's not around, a fact that Simeon finds funny.

Overall, Simeon loves the sweet pup dearly and Elsa loves him to a degree that shocks others lol

Luke:

!!!!!!!!!!!

The best of friends, through and through.

Luke practically fell in love with the dog instantly and Elsa loves older kids so the feeling was mutual.

(She doesn't like toddlers because of the time my nephew hit her when he was two, but loves older kids who know how to be gentle).

Often begs MC to let him to sleepover HoL for a night so he can spend more time with Elsa and even snuggle her while he falls asleep.

Will also bake her peanut butter treats, a favorite of hers 💕

These two are freaking cute together and no one is immune to it.

Overall: Besties. What more can I say?

[justagirlwhowritess]

This was asked for, I hope I did him justice, it was too long for tumblr, i got a little carried away but here's a snippet. Idk why soft mha as dads is ruining my life rn.

Pairing: Hizashi Yamada (Present Mic) x Fem! Reader

Genre: Fluffy/ a little sad

Warnings: Season 6 of the Anime Spoilers, slight mention of insecurities.

Additional Notes: N/A “He’s married?? But he’s sooo loud! His poor wife” you heard two girls in the hallway start giggling while they were talking about what you could only assume was your husband, pro hero and teacher who went by Present Mic. You worked for the biggest support company in Japan as one of the lead designers, always on the forefront of new hero technology. When it came to Hizashi, however, you met him during your time at UA. You adjusted your daughter on your hip as you continued to move down the hallway to Hizashi’s classroom. “Y/n? What are you doing here?” Aizawa asked, looking at you confused. “Shouta, lovely to see you. Hizashi asked me to come, and said something was happening and I needed to bring Kiki with me.” you told him truthfully. A scowl was now present on his face. Hizashi didn’t go into detail but you could sense his worry. The way he cared for you was unmatched. “Oh. That. Yeah, it’s probably going to be better coming from him." His words struck you as odd. “What does that mean?” you asked, tightening your grip on Kiki. “Danger is coming. Things are starting to get bad.” your eyes widen. Hairs start to stand on the back of your neck as you think about what he could possibly mean. “You should talk to him.” Aizawa states. “Talk to who about what?” you feel relieved at hearing Hizashi come up beside you. “Just the man I was looking for.” You hummed. His eyes perk up as he turns to you. “Oh really, for what?” he smirks. You laugh and hand him your restless child. “She has been driving me crazy, your turn. Also you asked me to come.” You spoke as he took his tired child in his arms. “Dada” she mumbled quietly as he got her situated. “Yeah, come on.” he mumbled, placing a hand on your back leading you to his now empty classroom. The kids must be at lunch, you think to yourself as you sit on the corner of his desk. “So, what is it?” you asked, trying not to grow impatient, today was your day off and you didn’t really want to spend it at UA. too many not so great memories. “You know the villain presence is getting stronger since the situation with all might. The liberation front is beginning to cause chaos. Nezu has decided to open the campus as a shelter. It will be safer for you and Kiki to stay here.” His words shook you to your core. You didn’t want to live here, even if it was temporary. “Hizashi I-I don’t want to stay here.” you told him as you rubbed your arm. He sighs. “Y/n don’t do this. You know this place is a fortress. You both will be safe here. If anything happens to either of you because of this I will never forgive myself.” You know he’s telling you the truth. You take your face in your hands and rub it lightly. “When?” you asked. “Tonight preferably.” his response elicits a groan from you. “How long have you known about this?” You asked, growing annoyed. “A few weeks.” He admitted. You cross your arms over your chest. “Why did you wait to tell me?” He sighs “Because you were so busy, and I didn’t think things were going to get this bad.” He shifts slightly, your daughter now asleep in his hold. “How bad have they gotten?” you ask cautiously. He wasn’t a private person, at least not with you. You watched the news, more so recently, but with how the media is you know there are things they are hiding. You know a lot about his students, Aizawa’s, even helped Mae Hatsume tweak some of her work for class 1-A. She is a brilliant child and you were trying to convince your company to snag her once she was closer to graduating. “Midoriya left, the kids want to go after him.” He admits. Your eyes widen “Wh-what? There are children fighting in this war?” You felt tears well in your eyes, you became slightly softer after the birth of Kiki, imagining children in this scenario would rattle even the strongest of wills. “Y/n, please, I am begging you, you need to be here.” He redirects the conversation back. “Fine. Gonna have to let my job know I'll be remote for a while. UA is a decent hike.”

The rest is on my A03! Link attached :D.

[cerseiwexler]

1 through 6 and 13, please <3

i asked in dms to clarify, and am going to be answering about miss mae taylor!

1. What kind of person is your OC in a crisis? Are they calm and collected? Do they panic? Or are they chronically the cause?

she's often aiding and abetting the cause at the very least tbh 💀 but when she's not, she experiences a panic response -- typically freezing, though on one occasion she's almost ready to fight (and on behalf of a simple goldfish, no less). when directed by someone else, though, she's usually able to push herself through the motions laid out for her. one thing that legitimately helps sometimes is her acting skill; if she can pretend to be okay until she's in a secure enough place to break down, then maybe she can stay cooler-headed until then. (when it's time for that breakdown, it comes hard. but that's a story for another question.)

2. Is your OC a loner or a social butterfly? Are they satisfied with how they come across to other people?

a social butterfly, 100%! honestly, a big part of the reason she's drawn to performance as a field is the attention and affection it allows her to receive. she's even more invested in the attention and affection in her interpersonal relationships. with the exception of her grandfather, she's close with her family, especially her sister. her circle of friends is mid-size, but she's quite close with each one of them; she has few casual acquaintances outside of folks she's brushed shoulders with at work, preferring more intimate connections. and then with jimmy and kim, she feels like she could just spend all day and night with them and not get bored or annoyed -- she'd crave interacting with other people after a while, but that wouldn't mean she wouldn't still want to spend time with them too.

3. What is your OC's financial status? Are they just scraping by, making enough to live comfortably, or wealthy? Has there ever been a drastic change in their status? If so, what happened?

at the beginning of what i consider her ~canon, mae is blacklisted in the regional acting industry by a powerful and awful producer (weinstein type), and scraping by on money she makes through the few tiny commercial jobs etc. she lands, and her burlesque dancing. luckily, she's got lots of friends with guest rooms and couches who are happy to help out for a while. when she and jimmy get together, he's still living in the nail salon he lives in at the beginning of bcs, so they largely split their time together between there and mae's friends' places. after that, the answer would involve bcs spoilers, so i will not tell you!!! : -)

4. Does your OC have a failed friendship or relationship they still think about? What happened? Is it an unresolved regret or is there a chance for reconciliation?

no, jimmy is actually mae's first serious relationship! she's had Flings here and there, but she's always been so career-minded that she spent her entire early 20s relentlessly trying to get her name out there with no time to spend on mere pursuits such as dating. especially in the entertainment world where youth is so commodified (which both mae and i could write a rant about it, but we will refrain), it felt like too important of a moment in her professional life.

5. Does your OC have a signature weapon and/or attack? How long did they train to master it?

one thing mae is absolutely not is an action girl. that said, she's an acting girl, which is something that comes in remarkably handy when dealing with organized crime and all the people who work in it. it's important to be able to project the image you want to project at all times! and she's trained since she was 4 or 5, doing her first kindergarten plays and falling in love with the craft. she was all about acting camps and classes as a kid, and then continued taking classes when she could afford them during the period when she lived in la (and even after her setbacks in albuquerque, to keep her skills sharp).

6. Does your OC know magic? Were they born with magical ability or did they train to acquire it? What is their favorite type of magic? Least favorite?

magic doesn't exist in her universe in a typical fictional way since her universe is... y'know, new mexico. but when she was a teenager she dabbled in potion making and spells. it was the unserious type of teenage dabbling that involves going to the old occult bookstore in town, picking up a volume that promises unrealistic results, trying a few rituals, then letting it collect dust on the shelf, but it was dabbling all the same.

13. How important are romantic relationships to your OC? Do they prefer casual sex, short flings, or long term relationships? Do they want to get married or are they content with what they have? Or do they have no interest in romance whatsoever?

if mae didn't have jimmy and kim, i think she'd still be more focused on Making It(TM) than on her personal life. she might get lonely sometimes and have little relationships sometimes, but i don't think they'd last very long or be very well reciprocated on her end. that said, since she does have jimmy and kim, romantic relationships matter extremely much! she feels very much that she's found her people in life, her soulmates, and isn't willing to let them go for anything. if anything, she might be a little bit too dedicated. but then again, would she be one of my little squad of semi-self insert ocs if she wasn't?

[minimutty]

Ok! I finally finished Fire Emblem Echoes! Gonna share my thoughts on the game and stuff below. Of course there might be spoilers, I played this game almost blind except the stuff spoiled to me by FEH.

Here we goooo

Art and Voice Acting: 10/10 absolutely beautiful. I particularly love Berkut's he did an absolutely great job. Fernand also. VA also gave Mae and Boey some great and funny lines, really fleshed em out.

Gameplay

A lot different than I was used to. The previous game I played was FE10, which was much more similar to the other FE games I played (6, 7, 8, 9). Healing/spells use HP. One inventory slot. No durability. No item management. No rescuing. It was different but not unmanageable. I did miss rescuing though. You could heal by eating flour, though, which was neat.

I played on Normal/Classic bc I'm a filthy casual, I think I only got Mathilda killed (I legit didn't even notice. Maybe I autobattled through it? I normally rewind if some1 dies.) Most enemies do like 1dmg, biggest thing was being ganged up on.

Plot

Nothing groundbreaking but not terrible imo. Guys go north, beat up dragon, shenanigans along the way. The relationship b/n Alm & Celica felt forced, I don't think any 10yo (however old they were) act that lovey dovey, felt very fairytale predestined unrealistic. Plus the whole beginning part of "your station doesnt matter" but oh look Alm is secretly destined to be King and he has a magic mark that makes him the chosen one so yeah nvm your station totally matters, haha. If I suddenly found out I was to be king after like 17years of not, I'd be a lil more reluctant than he was. I know about the controversy of Celica giving her soul but I won't get into that. She felt pressured into it so it's whatever. The revival of Celica felt a bit contrived, but I guess they gotta get married somehow, huh.

Classes

Alm: kinda fell off mid game until I gave him the Blessed Bow. Bows felt better on him until he got the final Weapon(tm), but he wasn't very strong most game for me.

Celica: Pretty good early game for me, fell off around mid, used mostly as a healbot and Seraphim spammer for the zombie characters. Not bad but not notable imo. I didn't get her super special weapon apparently but she was just healbot and Seraphiming by end game.

Clerics/Mages/etc: Entirely healbots by the end for me, their magic wasn't strong enough (aside from Seraphim) to be useful and using HP to cast spells made them really not worth it for him.

Archers: Absolutely nuts. 5+ range on basic archers? And I thought Rolf was crazy. I had Kliff, Leon, Alm, and Python as my dedicated archers. Kliff was the best for me.

Mercenary/Myrmidons: Insane. Saber was insane. 47 consistent crit and always doubles? He could legit toe with the final boss for a bit. Crazy movement range too. I had he solo parts of the map he was so good.

Armor: Actually not bad. I didn't use them previous games bc they had too lil move and still got nuked by mages. Here mages aren't as bad and they made good tanks. Lukas is legit the best character in the game in terms of character. Ace rep hype, haha.

Conclusion

Uhh, anyway. I had a good time with the game. The dungeon crawling parts were a bit annoying and exhaustive, so I had to take breaks from those, but other than that it wasn't bad. I had a good time. The upgraded graphics and animations were definitely a step up from RD imo.

[moviewarfare]

A Review of “Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes (2024)”

The Andy Serkis Planet of the Apes prequel/reboot was one of the most surprisingly enjoyable modern trilogies. The second movie in particular, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, is phenomenal! It was a great conclusion and didn't need more but when has that stopped Hollywood? The 4th entry no longer has Andy Serkis or director Matt Reeves. It is a whole new beginning of a new trilogy. Does it live up to what was done before?

Firstly, the film is visually remarkable! In an era where it feels common to see bad CGI, it is just lovely to see a movie where the CG is amazing. It also has great cinematography with a lot of gorgeous-looking shots. The movie being set 300 years after War of the Planet of the Apes, results in some great-looking world design. Seeing these old human landscapes covered in green in the background really showcases the time skip. It is also fun to see as well, such as a Baseball Stadium or shopping mall as places the characters go through. I also appreciate that they don't acknowledge it because why would they know what a shopping mall is? These locations are for us the audience to appreciate.

It was also difficult to make a great new protagonist after the amazing Caesar but I find Noa a good new protagonist. He is incredibly likeable and relatable, which is why it was easy to root for him on his quest. Proximus was also a solid villain despite only coming into play in the second half of the movie. He is basically a cult leader who is very charismatic yet menacing. There is also a great supporting character in Raja, an Orangutan that Noa meets. He is a fun character for Noa to bounce off. The actors all do a phenomenal job with special praise to Kevin Durand as Proximus. The first half with the adventure between Noa and Raja is the most fun and engaging part of the film.

Unfortunately, the second half is just not as good. Once the story has the character stuck in one location is when it starts to become kind of dull. There are many scenes where the characters are just sitting around and talking while the plot barely moves. The movie ends up feeling too long when it could easily shave off 10 minutes to improve the pacing. The music score is also very underwhelming. Michael Giacchino sadly doesn't return to compose and is instead replaced by John Paesano. However, he didn't do a great job as I didn't feel like there was a memorable soundtrack that elevated any of the scenes.

One of the strong elements of the Caesar trilogy is the strong human character to balance out with the Apes. Rise with Franco, Dawn with Jason and Gary Oldman, and War with Woody Harrelson. Kingdom has Mae played by Freya Allan but her character is just not that strong. Her story is very vague as it feels like they are leaving that for the sequel. It leads to her not being that likeable or interesting. It gets annoying in the second half when it starts to feel like she is taking the main character role away from Noa.

Overall, Kingdom is not as good as the Caesar trilogy. However, it isn't as bad as I thought it would be. There is a lot of charm in this movie and it is an engaging coming-of-age story. The ending is also intriguing enough that I would love to see where the sequel would take the story.

For more reviews like this visit:

https://moviewarfarereviews.blogspot.com/

[excusethequality]

🔪 - What is the strangest horror movie you’ve ever watched?

Oh, jeeeez...I watch so much weird shit (especially horror movies), I'm sure my take on this is very warped. It also very much depends on what exact definition of "Strange" you use.

I'm gonna have to be one of those annoying people who can't give a straight answer and give a few, because they're all strange in their own distinct ways.

Los Parecidos (2015) is a Mexican horror movie about a group of people that get caught in bus station during a hurricane when strange phenomena begin to occur. It's is based around a mystery and some places online seem to straight up spoil it in their description (so be warned), while others leave the mystery intact. I think if you're going to watch it, it's best to know as little as possible, so I won't say any more. But, suffice it to say: it's one of the weirdest reveals you've ever seen.

Monkey Shines (1988) is a movie from George Romero (aka the director of Night of the Living Dead) about a quadriplegic man who winds up getting a lab experiment as a helper monkey. Unfortunately for him the monkey forms a telepathic bond with him, falls in love with him, and then tries to kill anyone who gets between them. So...ummm, yeah, I think the strangeness there speaks for itself.

This one might just be an honorable mention, but Boxing Helena (1993). There's a strong argument to be made that this isn't a horror movie at all, but a thriller. But I also think that the movie goes so far outside the norm that I think you have to put Horror in the conversation again. If you consider Misery (1990) to be Horror, then this has to be considered as well. It's about a man who becomes obsessed with a woman and, uh, how do I put this...he tries to take away her autonomy in order to posses her. When I heard exactly what it was about I thought it was a joke so I looked it up, learned it wasn't a joke, immediately tracked down a copy, then spent the entire movie going, "what the fuck even is this?"

The Slumber Party Massacre (1982) is conceptually strange. First of all it is one of the rare horror movies written and directed by women. You see it was written by noted Mystery novelist and feminist Rita Mae Brown as a satire of the slasher genre, but all her satire went right over the studio's heads and they wanted it as a straight-forward slasher. Enter film editor Amy Holden Jones who wanted to try directing something and used the script to prove her worth. The result is this weirdly interesting concoction where you take a feminist script, translate it into typical genre piece, then direct it from a woman's point of view. I don't know if people who aren't big horror heads will appreciate just how odd this all is for an early 80s movie, but it's such a strange film when you look at it closely.

And then if we're talking truly "WTF even is this?"-level strange, then Mad God (2021), Skinamarink (2022), and Rubber (2010) have got to be up there. Because they're all movies where the creators clearly didn't give any fucks what anyone else thought and just went out there to make some weird shit.

[claire-starsword]

The Guardiana Magic School Run - Part 3

No doodle this time as I had no ideas, every joke about giant bats sucking has already been done I think. Also I've just realized I lost all my pre battle screenshots due to a emulation mishap so. Oops. We bad at pictures today, sorry.

Anyway. We return to Guardiana to sing our praises and maybe not dwell too much on the fact Gong just died. Resurrection is too a good display of Guardiana's magic. I guess.

We say hi to Mae and Gort and grab their weapons for extra money. We also grab plenty of stuff from the treasure room. The Antidote gets safely tucked in the item box as poison won't be a thing for the next battles. The Angel Wing is against my rules and thus to be sold. The Power Wine and Defense Potion also go to the item box as I don't see the need for them right now.

More importantly, the Rousing Ring. This thing is a gift for giant bat haters everywhere, preventing a character from falling asleep. Unfortunately there's only one in game (unless they show up in deals? but I sure haven't seen them there ever). I give it to Gong because Max is kinda overleveled right now, and Tao and Lowe should not be directly hitting enemies too often.

All the loot we could sell gives us a sizable chunk of money. I check the deals and there's still nothing there. The Guardiana weapon shop is also very disappointing. So it's time to start stocking on Steel Rings as I hoped. And by stocking I mean buy two. Definitely would like to have more, as for now, I move all three to Tao, who is by far the most frail character right now, and next battles will be more open so I don't think Max and Gong will manage to fully protect everyone.

I also replenish everyone's stock of Medical Herbs, which isn't a big deal since we didn't use many.

This is where I should have screenshots to show how absurd Max is getting in stats, his attack is like 20 compared to the others having less than 15, definitely need to let the others catch up on levels. Tao's base defense is 4, which is half of Gong's, the guy who died last battle. You can see now why I want those rings so bad. Especially since I recall now there being more Rune Knights next battle.

We cannot delay meeting them any longer. I save the game, and go on for the glory of Guardiana's Magic School.

The clear bonus is 400 gold for winning in at most 10 turns, almost enough money for another Steel Ring, so I want that, but perhaps I should have learned a lesson from last time. Also I don't think skipping enemies to get to Alterone is worth it, we'd miss a lot of exp. Let actually try to minimize deaths this time.

We have a couple of bats who I think will advance immediately, and a lot of dark dwarves. I would love if they didn't advance, which might mean taking things slowly and missing the bonus. Though they might advance anyway and then I'll feel very stupid. Oh well.

Turn 2, nothing happened. The dwarves indeed don't feel like moving, while the bats have inched closer. Let's see if we can deal with them quickly. I send Max to bait them as his huge stats should shrug off bats without much issue.

They take the bait immediately due to having great agility. Their position annoys me a bit, but at least every other character can hop to beat them up right now.

By characters I mean Tao. Lowe can't reach, and Gong gets dodged because flying enemies Do That A Lot. Tao does level up though, and gets Blaze 2, which is fun and exciting. I will mention though, she has yet to get a single defense point via level up. I'm beginning to wonder if it's ever a thing for her.

Turn 4. Gong has managed to hit the second bat and take more than half its HP so Tao can definitely finish it up after Gong tanks a hit, and he will not fall asleep due to his ring. Let's see if Max can bait some dwarves already, though I have little hope of getting the bonus. I just rather these guys come for Max than anyone else.

The dwarves refuse to come and are instead gathering to block the road, which is the fastest path to Alterone. But I said I wouldn't rush, so perhaps beating them from the forest side I can get some terrain bonuses. Unfortunately they too will be getting the terrain bonuses.

To put it plainly, I don't know what I'm doing.

Turn 6. Whatever I did was good, one dwarf came after while the others are now closer to the road and thus getting less terrain bonuses. Hope they stay that way.

Max and Gong team up flawlessly and Gong's level up makes him seem very determined to not die again.

Man, why did I even want the Demibuster.

Lowe is doing a whole bunch of nothing so I send him to heal Max from all the 1 damages he's been taking.

Everything proceeds smoothly and Tao proves that yes, she can get defense on level ups. Sometimes. Occasionally.

Lowe also gets to do something after Max kindly left a dwarf with 1 HP remaining.

Unfortunately we're at turn 9 with a mass of knights and bats remaining so it's safe to say the bonus is impossible. So let us be as cautious as possible and go through the forest, hoping dispatching the bats before the knights get involved.

The bats get baited and finally some snoozing happens. It's chill though, I legit skipped Max's turn to see if others can get the exp.

Lowe proceed to disappoint me as usual.

Eventually he does land a hit but it doesn't even do half and I don't have that kind of patience, Max reaps the rewards here and his level ups continue to be absolutely wild.

Knights are horrible in forests so I'm hoping it's okay to advance this much. Gong also heals himself for some exp, clearly no useful healing is getting done today.

I mess up again because they can still use the roads! Everyone thank the Steel Rings right now.

Gong is also reaping sweet rewards of his training. The reward is "dying less".

Tao spends her last MP on sweet revenge.

Lowe finally gets a level up from healing Tao, and learns Detox. This never happens in a timely manner on my usual playthroughs.

Nothing else to say, we wipe out the knights in this chill manner, with mostly Max and Gong. I try leaving this final guy for Lowe but Max counters because he's too good to share the spotlight. We're four or five turns beyond the bonus, I didn't pay attention, but the battle itself was pretty easy. I feel this will be a pattern in this playthrough, we're pretty overleveled for this part so we survive well, but with few characters we just don't deal enough damage to wipe the enemies fast enough. Obviously, this is because again I wanted all enemy exp instead of rushing to the objective.

There's only so much I can weep about it right now though. This is Alterone, the town full of loot. So money won't exactly be lacking. I might have one less Steel Ring by the end of the chapter though :(

after like ten minutes maybe more of opening chests, including the one after talking to the king, we have extra herbs, Healing Seed for the late game, another Power Wine and Defense Potion, a Life Loaf that might actually be from Guardiana and I didn't notice, some Middle Swords, plural, and useless wooden weapons, I can't understand why they're here. One Middle Sword manages to make Max more powerful than he already is. The rest of the weapons are going to make us rich as the average Alterone citizen.

The deals section decides to finally have something…

It is an axe. Which no one will use in this run. Also I would love to have data on these special weapons because the Jagged Flash tends to be the most useless of them to me, I don't notice any significant extra damage on flying enemies and flying enemies dodge it all the time anyway. This might be the worst thing we could have possibly rolled. Let's just check the normal weapon shop.

The Demibuster is a whopping 800 gold and actually weaker than the Middle Sword. It will still deal more damage against dark dwarves, but man, Max doesn't need it.

The Voodoo Staff meanwhile is a new weapon exactly between the Wooden and Power Staff. Makes sense, right? It can also poison enemies, which I guess could be useful, if we weren't killing anything in one or two hits anyway. With all that said, the Power Staff is debuting like, literally the next battle. I also don't have much interest in sending the blazing woman and healer guy to hit stuff when they could be blazing and healing instead, especially when their defenses still don't inspire much confidence. That's right baby this isn't the Alterone Magic School run this is the Guardiana Magic School, I'm going back there and grabbing more Steel Rings before the chapter closes!!

Just to complete the ramblings, Alterone has their own special ring too, the Evade Ring. In this version, characters have no natural chance of evading as far as I've seen, and depend on equipment like this instead. Of course, this one stacks to a chance of at most 6-8%, so it's very shaky compared to our great and solid Guardiana equipment. It is cheaper than Steel Rings though, so might be a good option for squishy characters once we run out of money.

For now though, we're off to funding the restoration of our glorious country. We buy three rings and store them safely in the item box for now.

We have an old friend to meet next time, after all.

Losses: 0 Deaths: 1 This episode: not yet sponsored by the Guardiana royal family but Queen Anri if you're out there I'd love the money

[panelshowsource]

anon wot do you meeeeeean hehe when dara does the buzzer it means get off the stage your turn is over! hehe

a buzz for good measure 🫡

here anon i did the world’s lowest budget photoshop just for you

hooonestly there are probably 3 gens — pre-2005, 2005–2012ish, 2013ish onwards — but for the sake of most people reading this it’s more like before and after ~2012. not that we’re being super pedantic about this, but if i say old gen then at least you know what’s going on in my head! sue and julian are both definitely old gen and i can’t WAITTT for that! apart from simon and definitely miles, we all want to see ed byrne, right?? gangly bastard i just love him

i am really surprised how many people said kiell was their overall favourite from the series, even though he was obviously a lot of fun. i have a serious aversion to...genuine anger. on taskmaster, at least? some frustration is okay (speaking of which omg i was just rewatching bridget x alex moments and it’s fucking HILARIOUS to me what she brings out in alex that literally no one else has, and i’m terrified of 1) her power and 2) alex’s tiny “for fuck’s sake”s)), and i obviously don’t mind bantz, but ed and greg and all of the contestants re-inforcing how annoyed kiell was at the trickery and scoring ambiguity was somewhat of a turn-off for me. there’s a spectrum of what i’d call uncool anger on the show ranging from iain stirling on the most offensive end to, like, josh widdicombe on the whiny, frustrated end? and kiell was certainly no iain and that’s not his overall comedic persona anyways, so it wasn’t that i came to dislike him, only that he couldn’t surmount the others to be one of my faves from the series. this is something that only i seemed to feel about fern, as well, when she genuinely whined about certain elements of the tasks or just used that, what greg called, “reverted to a 15-year-old complaining” voice that only i seemed to find pretty unfunny, but i disgress—

—ANYWAYS, i find that i like everyone on every series more the second or third time i watch it through, and i found both kiell and mae even more charming after watching it again! i was just thinking, wouldn’t it have been even more madness is kiell and jenny were on a team alone without mae to ground them in any way? LMAO...gives me a chuckle to imagine it... the team of 3 did feel just a hair too random this series, but i don’t think i would have changed frankie x ivo even though both jenny x kiell and oldies vs young’uns both would have been a little better overall. also it was so cute when kiell would totally body a task and then just give that :)!! i could see how much fun alex had with him and not quite knowing where he was going to go with things, and i think the contestants’ dynamics with alex are really underrated aspects of what make them great on the show. i do hope kiell looks back fondly at the whole experience :’)

omg that’s so exciting 🤩 i hope you have so much fun! did you begin from the first series? the first ~5 are some of the very best ever, so you’ll start on a real high!

[spinachcattt]

Leaf Pile - Steve Harrington

warnings: fluff :), steve not having a childhood, leaves.

Summary: Steve is raking the leaves and his girlfriend corals him into her fall shanegans

As the weather got cooler, the ground grew firm and the leaves lost their summery green in favour of reds and oranges before shortly falling off the trees, Steve and Maeve spent their time enjoying the cozy season. Until the leaves got to Steve, seeing the lawn littered with all the colours was great. Though, it was a pain to have to walk through. Plus more would fall and it would become more of a problem. So, on the weekend he bundled up and walked outside to begin managing their pretty, though slightly annoying, leaf problem.

He had raked half the lawn when Maeve came outside to see what he was up to. “Raking? This is your idea of a relaxing weekend?” She teased him, he turned to see her bundled up in his old coat. Still wearing her slippers, “Well, it was getting hard to walk through. I had to do something” Steve continued raking as she stood there. “What if I jumped in that pile,” Steve turned and glared at her. “Do not” She laughed at how stern he looked, “But if I did, what would you do?” She moved closer to the pile, taking slow steps. “You could get hurt, what if you hit the ground.” Maeve laughed, “Stevie, have you never jumped into a leaf pile before?” She asked as she grabbed the rake. “No, my mom said I would get too dirty and never let me.” He watched as she raked more leaves into his already very large pile. “Well, that old hag can’t stop you now,” Steve laughed and shrugged. “But what if I hit the ground? I don't need another head injury Mae Mae” She playfully rolled her eyes. She set the rake down and jumped into the pile. She was quickly swallowed by the red and orange leaves. Steve panicked and began tearing at the leaves. She popped out with a big smile on her face. “See I’m fine. The leaves cushion you, you won't hit the ground.” She got out and began raking the leaves back into a pile. "Go ahead, we can do it together.” She grabbed his hand and counted them down. They jumped into the pile. Once they both emerged from the leaves Steve had a big smile on his face. “That was fun” She laughed, “Bad news though babe. I lost a slipper” She held up her socked foot. He laughed and began feeling around for the fallen slipper. Once he found it he handed it back to her, he got out and once again began raking the leaves into a big pile. The two spent who knows how long jumping, and raking the leaves back into place. Steve felt warm, his heart full of love for his girlfriend. Watching her as she smiled and laughed, being childish and having fun. He wouldn’t want to spend his weekend any other way. So maybe the leaves on the front lawn weren't so bad…

[project1939]

Day 36- Film: Clash by Night 

Release date: June 16th, 1952. 

Studio: RKO 

Genre: Drama/noir 

Director: Fritz Lang 

Producer: Jerry Wald, Norman Krasna, Harriet Parsons 

Actors: Barbara Stanwyck, Paul Douglas, Robert Ryan, Marilyn Monroe 

Plot Summary: Mae Doyle returns home after 10 years when an illicit romance breaks up. No young woman anymore, she is now bitter and reclusive. When she and childhood friend Jerry begin dating, Mae tries to break it off, saying she would never be a good wife to him. Eventually she gives in and marries him, hoping that she can feel secure and learn to love him. It doesn’t take long for her to tire of his simple pragmatic ways, however. Jerry’s best friend Earl, meanwhile, falls desperately in love/lust with her. Will the temptation be too great to resist? 

My Rating (out of five stars): ***½ 

Damn, until about the last 10 minutes, I was going to give this 4 stars- even though I hated almost all of the characters! The ending nearly completely ruined it, though. Until then it was an unusually cynical and bleak movie for Hollywood in the early 1950s. It seemed obvious that it was an adaptation of a play, which it was, and it seemed obvious that the original ending was changed, which it was. I really struggle to even understand why this was adapted for the screen if a “happy” ending had to be tagged on to it. It completely compromises the entire thing. 

The Good: 

Barbara Stanwyck was impressive. She is definitely of the old school acting style, before the more naturalistic style we’re used to today became prevalent. Even so, I thought her performance was very effective. And my god, she played bitter and jaded well here! She gave me chills sometimes. 

Paul Douglas was also wonderful. A Letter to Three Wives is one of my favorite films, and I fell in love with him in that. He plays earnest everyman characters so well, and he’s always so likeable. His character in this is a bit weak and gullible, but also a genuinely good person. 

The main love triangle in this is between people who are all in their 40s! That is exceedingly rare for a Hollywood film even today. I loved the way that added a different layer of maturity and complexity. 

A lot of dialogue was really good, again, so no surprise that it came from a play. I usually try to jot down interesting quotes while I watch a movie, and there were so many, I kept having to pause this to get things written down. 

The cynicism and darkness were pervasive and engulfing. There was a kind of claustrophobia in all three of the main characters' lives, and it really made you feel trapped in a kind of hell with them. 

I hated so many of the characters, but they were real and made the despair of the story intense. Earl repulsed me on a physical level- I could barely stand to watch him. Mae was not a good person either. Jerry had a mooching uncle that I could barely stand. Even Jerry himself, generally being a good guy, was a bit annoying in how much he tolerated being around these terrible people. 

The Bad: 

The ending! The ending! I don’t know if I could ever tire of ranting about how stupid the ending was. Spoiler ahead: When Mae suddenly decided out of nowhere that she should go back to Jerry, it was ridiculous and totally out of character. When Jerry takes her back, I even said out loud, “Well, this will probably last a week!” Nothing about the film made sense with this kind of ending. 

Hating so many characters was a plus and a minus. The minus was that it made the movie hard to sit though at times. I could care less what happened to Earl or Uncle Vince or even Mae. 

If I didn’t hate Earl enough, he had a whole repeating segment about doing his “Chinese impression,” where he pulled at his eyes and made strange noises that sounded nothing like Chinese. I am SO SICK of these scenes in movies, radio, and tv shows! I hope they get less frequent as the project goes on, because I’m barely more than 1/3 finished.