#he is decent at apologizing to ppl he at least likes Enough

[selfoe]

shepherd if he doesn't like you

[toxintouch]

so I found your post about what if the cult that raised Unnamed MC was one of Vere's old cults and I just had a few thoughts. a Deicide Vere flavored thoughts.

(also I apologize in advance because this was a lot longer than I planned on it being lmao)

what if MC was meant to eventually be sacrificed? like, in an attempt to bring Vere back or something along those lines. and the MC knew they were going to be sacrificed; it probably played a decent factor in why they ran.

so how would MC react to finding out that Vere was the very deity that they grew up worshipping, had grown up knowing that they would eventually be sacrificed to him in a vain attempt to bring him back?

maybe the Devout Follower part of them hadn't been snuffed out by the time they met Vere. maybe all the old habits they tried to leave behind started to come back after being face-to-face with their god. maybe, in a scenario where something, or someone, would have to be sacrificed in order to remove the collar, they would decide to be almost exactly what the cult raised them to be: a sacrifice, but to free him instead of bringing him back?

or, alternatively, the Devout Follower part of them had been completely snuffed out by the time they met Vere. how would they react to finding out that, after all that running, they somehow managed to end up within arms reach of the very thing they had been running from? what if they choose to run again because of it, just up and leaving Eridia, leaving Vere still chained to the Senobium?

and of course: how would Vere react? MC being an ex-follower of his is one thing, but them being an ex-follower and an eventual sacrifice? someone who once fervently worshipped him and was, at least at some point in their life, fully willing to lay down their life for him with no guarantee it would even lead to anything?

(or how would he react to the "MC just fucking leaves" scenario specifically? sure, Normal/Canon Vere would be going through it, especially if him and MC were close, but Deicide Vere? yeah I think that would be his breaking point)

I don't mind the length at all!! I'm the last person who would ever complain, many ppl will attest to my long DMs, etc. In fact, thank you for taking the time to write out your ask and tysm taking an interest in my beloved Deicide Flavored Vere! ˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗ Sorry it took all day to respond, I wanted to be able to set aside proper time to read your message and consider! :3 You're picking up what I was thinking abt for sure with your sacrifice train of thought! Though I'll admit I was thinking more of MC being a less literal sacrifice - chosen as the conduit or the one who is supposed to find Vere and bring him back to his people now that he has disappeared.

Oh, but the literal sacrifice angle is juicy. And less convoluted/more clear than how I was trying to make the pieces fit, when I made that post? I let myself get stuck on the thought that I wanted MC to feel...fashioned for Vere, but I was thinking, perhaps, too logically & not cult-y enough, lol.

✦ Perhaps MC thought - when they were a child? - that they would be alive to meet Vere when he came back, but once they became older they realized that: no, they were to be a sacrifice to bring him back. They had to be ready to die for him. And they are only acting as Oracle in stead of their deity until they become strong enough to divine his return, which they (via the cult's teachings) believe will require them to sacrifice themself to him, to die...

But once they realize that their curse is a curse and not a god-given ability that's been granted to them... What else isn't true?

✦ Or perhaps they realize that to be a sacrifice is to die for their god at the same time they realize the truth about their hands, like you suggested, and they knew that they had to flee for the sake of their life and for the sake of finding freedom. They finally saw the gilded cage they had been kept in.

I definitely want to further explore the branching thoughts & paths of Sacrifice!Unnamed grappling with their Devotion vs Apostasy, but I don't want to keep you waiting too long for an answer so I will just resolve to make relevant posts as I consider more/write more! Until then:

✦ I think, even if they want to say that they have left all of their devotion to their god behind...old habits die hard. Things slip through the cracks. No matter how tightly you think you've closed the door, a sliver of a shadow can still find its way into the room where you thought you were safe and alone.

✦ In this MC's mind, they have always been Vere's.

✦ And Vere... [incoming POV shift to match the original Deicide fic]

His own autonomy is important to him, yes, but he's a hypocrite at heart. He's a glutton. He craves power. And he craves you.

He didn't put the collar on his own neck.

But you did.

You belong to him; you were made for him.

You devoted yourself to him, chained yourself willingly and he's not about to allow you to take all the oaths and prayers and the sweet, secret whispers you've given to him back.

(Oh, but he’d have been a kind god to you. Eventually. In that other time, that fictional reality where life is fair. You can earn his kindness, but never his mercy. It isn't in him to be merciful.)

You can't take your devotion back. He has a taste for it now. The only way he's letting it die is if he devours it whole.

And how had he not recognized the taste of himself already on you? How had he failed to notice, so distracted by your enticing promise, that he'd already laid claim? He's been woven into your life from the very start. He didn't even have to go to your town to demand you. You came to him.

(He'll reward them, still, the dregs of his followers – a quick death when he kills them for leaving their hand prints all over what they knew was his, for the suffering they inflicted on you that was his to mete out – suffering that was his to bless you will, as punishment or otherwise.)

And the depth of your devotion? That presses into him, something tender and cutting, unfamiliar or at least long forgotten. He'll reward you once he's satisfied with your repentance. Once you've renewed your faith in all the ways he sees fit.

(How shall be react to your willingness to die for him? It's been so long since he's had something to lose...)

✦ Deicide!Vere is such a mess of feelings. I think he would have a lot of trouble deciding what to do about Sacrifice!MC being willing (currently or previously) to die for him.

✦ The complexity of the matter is that: Were it anyone else, he wouldn't hesitate. He'd be pleased to throw them into harm's way if it meant being free. But Deicide!Vere has been lonely, searching for something - someone - like him for so long. I think he sees the potential of Sacrifice!MC as the one person outside of himself that he could really treasure. (AKA love) They're the "thing" he wanted most, before he lost his freedom. Being confronted with a situation where he may have to sacrifice one of his greatest desires for the other? Even he's not sure what he would do, if the situation arose as such. So he pushes that thought and that feeling away. My vision of Vere is that, though he is somewhat scheming, he is also impulsive and driven by hedonism. For regular Vere, I'm sure he pushes it away until it has to be an impulse decision. For Deicide Vere? This is the shittiest, no-win scenario. Low luck stat really comin' thru.

✦ Re: MC just fucking leaves scenario: I think you're right that something about that breaks him. The rejection. The idea that they've found him unworthy, not the other way around. But most of all: the abandonment. That they would leave him to suffer, presumably forever.

He's their god, yet it's them who's sentenced him to hell.

✦ Another thought I often consider: MC succeeds in removing his collar and even manages to survive doing it. But they don't chose to stay with him. He's been mistrusting of them, too cold and harsh and unwilling to see them as an equal (or at least: unwilling to admit that he does). And so, they lay the collar at his feet and leave. One last supplication, the final prayer from their lips being: "Goodbye, Vere." And the door is firmly shut, this time. He's free but he's back where he started. Searching. Alone. (He knows they're out there somewhere, but they've surpassed him in order to free him. If he hides in the shadow, they hide - they live in the places that match their golden veins, and he can't find them there.)

✦ He thought he could find them anywhere. But he's lost their scent....

I know my reply was a little bit messy, but hopefully I've answered in a way that was fun to read! and maybe even scratched some of the Deicide!Vere itch for anyone who, like me, is constantly infected. Ty again for joining me in my little brainrot corner!

p.s. lmk if i didn't answer/can answer anything more specific that u were hoping for an answer to, it's been kinda a week for my brain!

[drifloonz]

dating headcanons between g!red x reader x steven?? :3

my name is glitchy red, yo. [ VINE BOOM ]. my husbands name. is strangled red, yo. [ LOUDER VINE BOOM ]

[ said at the same time ] and this is our partner, y/n red, yo. [ THE MOST OBNOXIOUS VINE BOOM YOU'VE EVER HEARD ]

sorry. Anyways that was a yes. i assume this is polyamorous bc i always assume that by default ( love triangles are boring, fight me )

long As usual and im not too proud of this ( i ramble too much!! i get too into the dynamics and the issues and the characterization rather than just the lovey fluffy stuff ppl prob want!!! ) but i hope it suffices

glitchy red x reader x steven headcanons!

ღ i have no idea in what situation you'd start dating the two of them, and i have no idea how steven and glitchy met either. but hey. You're all in a relationship now. This is a win for red emoboy kissers

ღ i like to think glitchy and steven argue sometimes. its honestly mostly glitchy getting angry, and then steven responding in an entirely neutral tone, and glitchy getting angrier and mistaking it for vague passive aggressiveness bc steven's tone is hard to read a lot of the time. To be fair steven is sometimes smug or passive-aggressive when he feels comfortable being like that, mainly with glitchy since he likes to piss him off as a joke. he usually does this later on in a relationship since he initially doesn't speak much. please calm them both down theyll bite eachother ( not really ) ( ... i mean ok, glitchy will probably bite, but it'd barely make steven flinch )

ღ if they ever have a genuine argument both of them usually don't apologize without a bit of nudging. or until like. weeks later. please nudge them in that direction for a Healthier Relationship. they'll kiss and make up and then kiss you at the same time. they both love u very much <33

ღ two very big scary boyfriends <333. glitchy is the one who obviously lets himself show emotion a lot more visibly - at least, his rage. if anyone is shitty to you glitchy is going off on their ass verbally, and steven is just staring at them. like. fucking death glaring. neither of them will genuinely hurt anyone unless they hurt anyone within the relationship first, but they do have thoughts about it. They Consider It.

ღ glitchy likes to explore a lot more than steven does - mostly pacing and taking a stroll to clear his mind or let off steam after an argument or negative experience. if you also want to then glitchy and you will drag a tentative steven around by the hair. he just lets it happen at this point. Most stable polycule.

ღ you two will usually end up in a cafe or smth bc glitchy is the one who usually initiates dates, due to just exploring and finding a place that catches his eye and then mentally jotting it down for later to take you two there. the waiter will be so confused since... pallet town's local ex-champion cryptid, the current champion but put through jpeg compression, and someone who is Probably relatively normal are sitting at a table together. they didn't get paid enough for this.

ღ steven is a decent amount taller than both you and glitchy. glitchy himself is probably 5'11 or 6' and steven is like fucking 6'6 or something insane like that. he's also pretty strong. will usually scruff the two of you out of bad situations or when either of you are misbehaving. he is somehow the most functional and reasonable one out of the polycule, probably, which is very funny considering how dysfunctional he actually is.

ღ steven and glitchy both very much enjoy their hair being played with, styled, or brushed.... a good lazy day in for the two of you is cuddling in bed while you brush and braid stevens hair, and pet glitchys ( surprisingly soft! ) hair at the same time. the two will also do this to each other sometimes, but since glitchy is Bad at taking care of hair all he'll do is run his hands through steven's.

ღ if you like this as well, they'll be sure to reciprocate. do be warned that glitchy has no fucking idea how to take care of hair though. steven does since he has long hair, but glitchy just. Never had to do that. glitchy will just run his hands through your hair though since he's certain he can't mess that up - hopefully.

ღ they both have very similar clothes. you will probably joke about how they'd look like the same person if glitchy didn't have his whole glitchy aura and had longer hair. after some thinking, the two probably talk and buy you a matching set of clothes along with your own hat out of sheer curiousity. they will not admit it but... you look really cute in it.

ღ steven and you will play games together sometimes ( once again. never forget that steven is canonically a gamer. Do not let anyone forget ) and glitchy will just sit there and backseat. steven probably doesn't get that annoyed by it, but if you do then he finds your outbursts after you've had enough of glitchy back seating sorta funny.

ღ if you're the type of person to give compliments really easily, it'll destroy both of them. glitchy will stutter and flub his words and his face will become more red than his namesake, while steven on the other hand will just... blush, look away, and mumble a "Thanks."

ღ they will get back at you for this though ( aka both will intentionally try to fluster you and hard. they also try to fluster each other sometimes. especially when arguing, steven will just say shit like "You look nice today." to glitchy ( mostly to make him shut up ) and he'll continue ranting until his brain registers what steven just said and then he'll just verbally keysmash like "IUQYhnj(!*&????" . because he can do that this is canon im the author of glitchy red /j )

ღ steven's probably the best at flustering you two, though. after all he Did used to be a people person and also had a girlfriend. although he used to be stereotypically romantic and cheesy with it, but nowadays especially the more the relationship goes on, he can just casually say smth like "You look hot, by the way." and just not think about it. he always flirts in a very blunt and straightforward way like this and it messes with you two - he finds the reactions funny and will just silently chuckle to himself.

ღ i sort of forget a bunch of details abt glitchy reds og pokepasta sometimes - for example glitchy Probably not having pokemon due to the weird... cursed... poison... thing in the og pokepasta. therefore, you all have a mutual pokemon as a pet. which is a big hulking fucking dragon. you know what time it is baby its MIKI TIME !!!!!!!! glitchy might be freaked out around her, mainly her... missingno bits. missingno doesn't scare him as much as it used to - there were much worse glitches out there to him, but god he never gets fully used to it. he'll eventually calm down the more and more he sees her, but he can't help but be unnerved. still gives her pets though and she seems to appreciate it?

ღ due to this steven will sometimes make miki jumpscare glitchy bc he finds it funny. glitchy Very much does not find it funny and he'll panic and glitch out pretty hard. miki feels bad. steven feels a little bad. you have to reconcile them after this like you do a bunch of other times </3

ღ glitchy also does piss off steven and fuck around with him sometimes more than he should though. they really just like to get under eachothers skin. and then sometimes make out as an apology. Most stable polycule x 2. they're sort of petty and childish with how often they try to prank and piss each other off. neither will stop until you tell them to or until they even the scores out between them. please help them or else they'll divorce for the 45th time ( they're not even married )

ღ glitchy is usually the one who points out and pushes steven to take care of himself, though. if you're bad at doing that for yourself then he will with you as well - he notices because he's surprisingly the person that takes care of himself the most. ever since he got out of the game he craves to feel and be real, so he loves to eat and bathe and sleep and do all of that since he was never able to in the game, so it's easy for him to notice when you two aren't.

ღ steven sometimes has bad dreams, mostly about The Incidents. it'll be pretty clear when he does - usually grumbling or sleeptalking and moving around in his sleep a decent bit. due to glitchys Dream Bullshit Powers he'll help steven if he's awake when he's having a bad nightmare. same with you. i like to think glitchy just doesn't have the capability dream whatsoever ( or he does but theyre always lucid ), but it's up in the air.

ღ these two both hug spine crushingly tight because both are very undersocialized. you have to tell them to knock it off and go lighter. when they cuddle with you in bed though, they're noticeably a lot better about it. the two wrapping their arms around you makes you feel really safe and loved.

ღ whoevers in the middle when you two go to bed / cuddle changes sometimes. steven's content with being on the sides, but glitchy and you i like to think sometimes argue for that middle spot. he loves being held even though he will never admit it. please hold his hand or hug him he will Fucking die.

ღ when glitchy or steven can't sleep, they're both the type of person to just sorta watch you sleep and take comfort in it. they don't intend to be creepy about it but if you wake up and just see their red fucking eyes staring back it is slightly jarring.

ღ steven is at least decent at cooking. glitchy is trying to learn how. both are Malewifes. will give you breakfast in bed with a side of 50 kisses.

ღ if you ( or glitchy, somehow??? ) are sick though, steven will be the one to try to take responsibility, mostly bc glitchy doesn't know ... how to really help. and steven's used to taking care of sick people since he's had a few times in his life where he had to care of his brother, his (ex) girlfriend, and his pokemon when they were sick. if steven himself is sick though he'll just either pretend he isn't and do his day-to-day things until he collapses, or will just sit in bed until it goes away.

ღ glitchy has a soft spot for plushies and will probably buy and collect a few to adorn your ( probably shared ) bed/bedroom with.

ღ they both snore a little, glitchy snoring the loudest. i hope you are not annoyed by snoring bc if you are then uhh. Woops.

ღ steven has gotten into the habit of making some hot tea for himself and you two whenever he wakes up, so i hope you like tea. it's mostly for his own throat to be honest.

ღ please massage steven's back for him his scoliosis is fucking awful. literally if you even just lay on his back he'll probably like it. glitchy slouches a little but not as often. if you asked steven to stand up straight you'd hear 50 of his bones crack /j /probably

ღ steven's usually either basically always up or is up at the weirdest times ever. dude who goes to bed at like 8 am. or 4 pm.

ღ glitchy i don't think is much better but he's slightly more normal about it. they'll try to orient their schedules around yours though ( aka by sleeping around the time you do ), since... neither really have much to do anyways?

ღ since glitchys the one that goes out a lot ( other than maybe you ) he buys the two of you gifts a lot. you will be bombarded with affection. NOW !!

ღ ok i dont have that much else to pad this out with uhh erm uhhhhhhh. they may fight w eachother a lot but they really do love eachother. and you especially! you're like the glue that holds the whole thing together and the two of them really appreciate it.

[hhoneyglasss]

i’m glad i’m not the only one whose had this stuck in their head lol.

look, i love sam, i do, but he’s v, v stubborn. ik he said he “knew he could heal himself,” but i rly doubt that he would’ve been able to. i think he would’ve died if alexis hadn’t turned him. i mean, he was the one who said that he wasn’t able to direct his own healing magic fast enough to heal her bite, which u’d think would be smth easy to heal, or easiER at least, especially for someone who has studied as a healer for who knows how long.

also, u’re v right abt how suspicious it would’ve looked if alexis hadn’t turned sam. but honestly, in either outcome (whether she turned him or allowed him to die), she looks like a vengeful, borderline evil prick who couldn’t take it when someone told her ‘no,’ whether that ‘no’ came from sam’s refusal to being turned or him telling her he didn’t have romantic feelings for her, or both. the situation looks bad in every circumstance, especially when u consider what sam has said abt her personality and attitude.

i’m so curious abt her intentions tho. like i’m burning up inside bcuz i NEED to know whether she’s just straight up evil, actually a decent person who just wanted sam to live (even if his future didn’t include her in it), or a mixture of both. i’m also curious to know what other ppl think bcuz the fandom seems pretty split halfway down the middle as to who alexis is and y she actually turned him. i also will forever think it’s interesting how she nvr apologized— if u cared abt someone and then did smth horrible to them (like turning them w/o their consent), especially someone u wanted to pursue a romantic relationship w, wouldn’t u try to save it? wouldn’t u try to take that first step in at least apologizing, even if someone else (like william or vincent) had to be present?

but then again, she also knew to keep her distance? like she hasn’t still tried to pursue sam, she’s not still chasing him— at least not obviously. to assume she isn’t still chasing him, she knew to draw that boundary and leave him alone. she directly avoids him— they both avoid each other, it’s not just one way with sam only avoiding her. u could argue it’s an example of how she genuinely does care abt him. but then how she nvr apologized directly contradicts that 😭 she’s so confusing, i both love it and hate it. it’s good writing nonetheless, tho.

i saw a post a while ago pointing out that there r parallels in the imperium and prime universe, and i hv to wonder if alexis’s hatred for werewolves (she killed them in the imperium, right?) will transfer over to the prime universe. or ooooo if that hatred blooms bcuz of darlin. that’s hella interesting!

also, the debate of whether or not intention matters in a situation like this is clearer for me. personally, i don’t think it matters. while there is a huge part of me (probably half of me lol), that hopes alexis just wanted him to survive for himself, not her, i don’t think it matters bcuz at the end of the day/night, she nvr apologized. she still took away his right to say ‘no’, even if he might not hv been thinking clearly. she forced him into vampirism, which is a path u can’t turn back from. he is literally living w HER decision every single day, not his own, for the rest of eternity. it’s not some scar he can hide or a memory he can force himself to forget bcuz he’s reminded of what she did every time he has to feed, every time he has to use his powers, and just every time he looks into a mirror. it’s like a shadow following him wherever he goes— now that i’m thinking abt it, that sounds genuinely miserable; like HORRIBLE. i’d be way more bitter or pessimistic abt everything if i had to live like that. i’d lose my fuckin mind bro.

2 much writing abt a topic that rly doesn’t matter 2 furious. but what can i say, its fun to talk abt!! who knew the dichotomy of consent in near-death situations could be so damn interesting!

oooh ia with your turning post, but it made me think of other 'turnings under duress' like can you really consent to being turned truly in a situation like lovely's where you've never discussed it before and are literally dying in that moment??

i was thinking abt that too! and tbh, i hv no idea. u’re honestly right, bcuz how r u in ur right state of mind in a situation like lovely’s where the life force has literally been slurped out of u by a bunch of shades. like how r u supposed to hv a clear mind when all u’re focusing on is trying to stay calm???? it’s a blurred line that i can’t really see the answer too.

ig u could argue that it’s a bit different with lovely and vincent bcuz they were partners prior and it was a perilous situation, but even then, lovely didn’t give full consent bcuz they physically couldn’t. and just bcuz u’re partners w someone doesn’t mean u hv a right to their bodily autonomy.

i think a situation like alexis’s and sam’s is slightly clearer to navigate. even though they were friends and it was ALSO a perilous situation, sam literally said “no, i don’t want that.” and alexis took it as a flashing green light and basically said, “no means yes!!! now let me at him!!”

but ALSO— was sam rly able to think clearly either? i mean, i don’t think so— bro had a car door INSIDE of him. could he really think abt how he was going to die when all he was thinking abt was the metal lodged in his torso? u could argue alexis was just trying to save him and meant no harm, and maybe if the situation was different, sam would’ve been grateful for him ‘saving’ her. idk abt alexis’s intentions tho, since we hvn’t met her in the prime universe. but do her intentions even matter when the harm was still done?

i think lovely’s and sam’s situations r more similar than some ppl think— each person just looks back at their own turning w different lenses bcuz of the different response they both had to asking if they wanted to be turned (or, forced, in sam’s case.) lovely looks back on it as vincent saving them, while sam looks back on his as his right to being human stripped from him. and both of their views r valid.

also oops, u probably didn’t expect an essay on the tribulations of navigating consent in a vampiric world LMAO, sry abt the ramble. this has just been rattling in my head for awhile and i was talking abt it w my friend the other day. apologies for u hving to be on the receiving end of my word vomit!!!!! but thanks a bunch for the brain juice 🧃

[t0wnspersonb]

Twin Bed (Tsukishima Kei x Reader)

Anonymous said:

are u taking requests rn? 🥺 ive read ur tsukki fics and i know to myself ur the only one who can write this request amazingly: tsukki sneaking in to his s/o’s room at night bc he misses her and he saw how cute she is in her pajamas but couldnt help getting turned on as well bc she is wearing shorts and an oversized shirt it also didnt help that her bed is for one person only ;) UR AN AMAZING AUTHOR AND NEVER STOP WRITING TSUKKI OR HAIKYUU SCENARIOS COS THE PPL NEED U

~~~

Word Count: 2,475

Rated: Explicit

Warnings: SMUT, my shit writing, bad language

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Yoooo this is was legit so fun to write lmao. I hope I did your request justice anon and I appreciate your kind words!!! I know I have other requests sitting in my inbox and I will try and to get to them soon. I might be a bit inactive the next couple of weeks, I will be going vacation (I definitely fucking need it lol) this week and then I start classes again. RIP. I hope you guys enjoy this one and let me know what you think!:) I literally am at a lost for words with how amazing you guys are and how unproblematic you guys have been considering the bullshit that’s been going around in the community. I just want to reiterate that this is a safe and fun place for everyone, it is never my intention to make anyone uncomfortable and if I do please let me know so that I can apologize correctly for it! But to make things clear I will not tolerate any fuckery on this blog, I don’t have the energy nor the patience to deal with shit like that. We are all capable of being decent human beings to each other. No drama, no bullshit, just a fun and safe place for everyone that wants to be part of it. ANYWAY, enough of my ranting, please enjoy this filth and my shit writing lmao 😘😘😘💕💕💕💕

~~~

You frowned slightly as you looked at your phone, your eyes squinting against the harshness of the light. 

 Tsukishima had texted you, multiple times - at two in the morning - in fact. While you dearly adored your boyfriend of only five months, you didn’t exactly adore the fact that he woke you up at this time.

 Especially considering you had to be up in about five hours to get ready for an exam.

 You sighed through your nose as you tugged your blankets from your body and made your way to your door. 

 “Kei… it’s two in the morning…” You yawned, looking up at your tall boyfriend with sleepy eyes. “The dorm manager is going to get mad at me if she catches you here.” 

 “Well let’s not get caught then.” he drawled out, gold eyes flickering over your body. A blonde eyebrow arched up; “is that my shirt?”

 You blinked at him for a moment, not fully registering what he had just asked before a soft blush began to coat your cheeks.

 You were definitely wearing one of his shirts, a green Sendai Frogs shirt that was way too big for your body, given his tall stature. He had left the shirt at your dorm two weeks ago, and naturally you wore it to bed almost every night. 

 “No.” You said in a small voice, carefully playing with your fingers as you looked up at him through your lashes.

 A soft blush covered Tsukishima’s cheeks before he scoffed, his slender fingers reaching up to push his glasses back up his nose. “You’re a terrible liar. Looks good on you though.” he said, brushing past you to get into your room.

 You turned to see him plop himself onto your bed, and you couldn’t help but stare. It was a strange sight to see to say the least. His 6’4 frame was just a tad out of place in your room, especially sitting on your incredibly small bed. But more so he was out of place because, well, your boyfriend was beautiful. It was like a Greek god decided to pay you a secret visit before the sun came up, ready to disappear at any moment. 

 Tsukishima’s hair was tousled perfectly, the tight black shirt he wore complimented him perfectly, emphasizing his broad shoulders and thick biceps. You felt your mouth go dry as you realized that he was wearing grey sweatpants, clinging low on his hips.

 How could someone look so good at two in the morning?

 ��Are you just going to stare at me the entire time?” He called out, his back leaning against the wall your bed was pushed up against, his phone in hand. 

 “You’re the one that wanted to come over.” you frowned, locking your door before making your way towards the bed. “You’re taking up all the space.” You whined. 

 He rolled his eyes before his long legs parted, creating a space on the bed. “Come here.” 

 You felt your face burn even more, a strange shyness overtaking you at the intimate position he wanted you in. 

 It wasn’t like you had never been close to Tsukishima before, you guys had been intimate, many times... but then why were you so nervous all of a sudden?

 “What are you waiting for?” he asked, a blonde eyebrow quirked up.

 “Shut up.” you grumbled, carefully climbing over one of his long legs. You settled yourself against him, your upper body fitting easily between his legs, your back resting against his stomach and your head gently pressing into his strong chest.

 Resting against Tsukishima was far better than resting in your tiny bed. 

 One of his arms carefully wrapped around your waist, his large hand gently pressing against your stomach, the other hand held his phone in front of both of you, a volleyball game overtaking the screen.

 It was silent for a moment, both of you absorbed in the video. It had only been fifteen minutes into the game when Tsukishima began looking over your body. His gold eyes taking in your bare legs before flickering up. He zeroed in on the exposed skin of your hip, the shirt you wore had been pulled up slightly. 

 He swallowed thickly, arousal beginning to spike in his blood. Christ, it wasn’t like you were naked right now; it wasn’t like you were wearing anything incredibly enticing, but… fuck. Tsukishima began wracking his brain for when the last time it was that he had seen you. That’s right, it had been a while, a little over two weeks in fact. 

 His sudden desire was because he had just missed you right? He couldn’t possibly be turned on from the simple fact that you were in the shortest shorts known to man, or the fact that you were in his shirt and you weren’t…. Christ, you weren’t wearing a fucking bra. 

 He could see your hardened nipples through the shirt despite how baggy it was on your small body. 

 “Can you hold the phone, my arm is getting tired.” he said quietly, hoping that you hadn’t felt his hardening member against your back just yet. 

 “Really Kei?” you rolled your eyes but took his phone nonetheless, your eyes completely glued to the screen. The game was just beginning to get interesting.

 It was silent again.

 But this time, Tsukishima trailed his hand down to your exposed skin, carefully sliding his fingers under your shirt, gently tracing against your soft skin.

 You sighed softly at his touch, your body wiggling slightly against him to get more comfortable. Tsukishima took that as a good sign, his hands traveling further up, the rough pads of his fingers felt incredible against your skin; goosebumps erupting over your body.

 You shivered slightly, desire spiking in the pit of your stomach as his long fingers began moving further up, until they rested just below your breasts. Your breath hitched, your heart thumping loudly in your ears now. 

 His fingers carefully dragged against the soft underside of your breasts. You felt Tsukishima shift, his upper body sitting up slightly, his lips brushing gently against the shell of your outer ear, hot breath rustled your hair. 

 “Who’s winning?” he murmured, lips grazing against your ear before carefully brushing down towards your neck.

A soft whimper tore through your lips. “It’s uhmm… uh - o-oh Kei.” your eyes fluttered shut as his tongue darted across your skin, tasting you before biting down softly. You could feel your cunt clenching at his actions, your bundle of nerves suddenly throbbing to be touched.

 “What was that?” he teased softly, the hand that was gently caressing the underside of your breasts suddenly moved up, carefully cupping your entire breast, long fingers gently tugging at your hardened nipple.

 You moaned loudly before immediately dropping his phone, both hands clasping your mouth shut tightly.

 “Oh, that’s right, if your dorm manager caught me here, she would be furious right? I don’t want you getting in trouble, so you best be quiet hmm?” he murmured softly against your skin before pinching your nipple hard between two fingers.

 Your breath hitched, your eyes squeezing shut as pleasure rippled through your body.

 “But you make the cutest noises when you're turned on.” he said, his voice incredibly quiet and calm, despite the growing hardness that was pressing into your back now. “You’re in quite the dilemma, aren’t you?”

 His other hand suddenly trailed down, his fingers curling against your through your shorts. 

 “Fuck… you’re soaked.” he groaned quietly, feeling your arousal leaking through your panties and staining your shorts.

 He suddenly leaned back once again, your head once again resting against his strong chest. But despite his composure, his heart was racing just as much as yours. 

 He suddenly bucked his hips up, his cock rubbing against your back. A soft sigh escaped his lips, the hand that was groping your breast pulled out of your shirt and tangled into your hair, gently tugging and forcing you to arch your neck, staring up at the blonde male now.

 His gold eyes held nothing but lust now as he stared down at you with half-lidded eyes. 

 You had never seen a more gorgeous man in your entire life. 

 “What do you want?” he asked, his voice deep with arousal. But before you could say anything, the hand that was grasping you through your clothes suddenly tugged your shorts and panties to the side, long fingers brushing softly against your weeping slit.

 Tsukishima exhaled loudly, his cock jumping against your back as he felt just how wet you were. 

 “Fuck…” he whispered quietly, and carefully slid his finger to the top of your cunt, his finger gently pressing down against your clit.

 A jolt of pleasure erupted through your body, your mouth falling open in a silent plea as your eyes fluttered shut.

 He began rubbing delicate circles against you, a soft pleasure beginning to build up in your lower stomach, your hips rocking up carefully with his movements.

 “K-Kei…” you trembled, your hand reaching down and grasping at his forearm helplessly. 

 “Are you close?” he asked, his finger pressing down just a little bit harder, but that was all that you needed to get your legs shaking.

 The way he touched you… the way that he took care of you… it was no wonder you were completely head over heels for him.

 He was just too good.

 You nodded helplessly against his chest, and then suddenly he pulled his hand away from your dripping cunt, a soft cry of distress tearing through your lips. Why did he… but you were so close…

 “Can you move away for a second?” he asked quietly, gently pushing you forward. You shakily scooted away from him and heard the rustling of sheets and clothes. You twisted your head to look back and - your mouth went dry.

 Tsukishima was still resting against the wall, his lower body easily sprawled out against your bed as you still sat between his long legs, but this time… this time… he laid with one hand behind his head, the other was easily grasping his member, lazily sliding up and down his shaft. His grey sweatpants were bunched up around the tops of his thighs, his black shirt pulled up slightly, exposing his lower stomach and the perfect lines of his Adonis belt.

 “Come here.” he demanded, you turned to crawl over to him, fully intending on taking him into your mouth- his hand flew up, halting your movements. “No. I want to be inside you.”

 Your lips parted slightly as you nodded in a daze, your cunt squeezing around nothing at his words. But before you could sink down on top of his cock, he stopped you once more. 

 “Turn around.” he commanded. Your lips trembled softly, your hands gripping his upper thighs as you situated yourself on top of him, you could feel his fingers tugging your shorts and underwear to the side again, and then something blunt and thick began rubbing up and down your soaked entrance. 

 “Don’t tease me Kei, please.” you whimpered out, but before you could plead further, he grabbed your hips, forcing you to sink all the way down onto his member in one movement.

 You gritted your teeth tightly, biting back the loud shout that wanted to escape your throat at the sudden intrusion, at the force of him already hitting the most devastating depths within you.

 Fuck you had never been quite this full, never had someone quite this deep until you met Tsukishima.

 “Shit.” he cursed, growling slightly, his grip on your hips tightening as his eyes fluttered shut as your tight heat engulfed him completely.

 He could never get used to this. 

 After a moment of adjusting to the new intrusion you began rocking your hips, carefully sliding back and forth, your lips forming into a silent o as pleasure jolted through your body at each drag of his cock against your walls.

 A soft whimper tore through your lips as he began grabbing handfuls of your ass, his fingers gripping tightly at the soft flesh, kneading and pulling your cheeks apart. Before his hand settled on pulling your shorts and underwear further away, his eyes taking in the obscene way your cunt swallowed his cock.

 The quiet room was filled with the sound of rustling sheets, the wet noises of your arousal leaking through your stuffed cunt as Tsukishima slid in and out of you, the soft and breathless moans that escaped your lips, and the soft grunts of Tsukishima as he fought back his release. He couldn’t cum yet, not until you did.

 But he could tell that you were close by the desperate way you rocked your hips, faster, sloppier, chasing for a release.

 “Cum for me.” he demanded, his large hand cracking down against your ass. Your hand came up, stifling the loud gasp that wanted to escape your lips, your cunt clenching tightly around him. You could feel it then, the pleasure mixed with the sharp pain, the tightness in your lower stomach finally releasing. 

 “Fuck that’s it.” He murmured, watching as you trembled above him, his hands coming down to grip at your waist, forcing you to move faster against him as he began chasing his own release.

 Tsukishima gritted his teeth tightly before carefully shoving you off of his member, a soft cry escaping your lips as you collapsed on top of his legs. He gripped his member tightly, shooting thick ropes of his warmth all over your raised bottom, staining your shorts completely.

 “Shit hold on.” he panted slightly, carefully moving himself from under you. He tucked his softening member back into his sweatpants before moving towards your closet, grabbing a towel and making his way back to you. His gentle hands easily cleaning you up before tugging your shorts and panties off, replacing them with fresh ones.

 You looked up at him sleepily as he began situating you both on your small body, half of your body resting on top of his as he drew the blankets over your guys’ form. 

 “You suck Kei. If I fail this exam because I’m too tired to focus, you have to buy me ramen.” you mumbled against his chest, your eyes drooping as sleep began to tug at your mind.

 “If you fail this exam just because you’re tired then that just proves you didn’t actually study for it. You should’ve been able to retain that information regardless.” he said, fingers gently running through your hair.

 “You suck.” you sighed again, softly nuzzling your face into his chest.

 A smile tugged at his lips, but he didn’t say anything else. 

 Not that you would have listened anyway, considering that you were knocked out now. 

 Tsukishima’s body was definitely more comfortable than your twin bed. 

[saturnwritings]

freeze your brain

—after a disheartening start to the evening leads you to hide under a table at a party, a chance encounter with kenma leads you to have one of the best nights of your life. | based on a pov by a cosplayer on tiktok (@/sea.kaninchen)

pairing(s): kenma x reader, past/brief daishou x reader 

word count: 3993

warnings: cheating, hints to sexual themes (only briefly)

a/n: i think i should mention that I DONT HATE DAISHOU!!! i think hes a complex and interesting character and ppl shit on him a lot but i did need a villain for this so im sorry for being basic he doesnt deserve this 😪also i was honestly really excited to do this?? like tiktok cosplayers’ povs are not bad i love cosplayers its just straight tiktok’s povs im sorry 😔 

9:32pm.

You let out a sigh as you glance at your phone for what seemed like the thousandth time that night, the numbers moving slow, in almost a mocking way. The blinding, multi-colored lights dancing around the room kind of made your eyes spin, and the air around you made you wonder if it was possible to describe air as ‘sticky’ and what… questionable ways it could get to that state. There were bodies moving all around the room, most likely all around the house, doing a multitude of things: dancing, talking, loitering.

You had been coerced by your friends, as well as your boyfriend, Daishou, to come to this party, with promises of letting loose and free food. As reluctant as you were, your boyfriend had assured you that he would personally make sure you had a good time; said boyfriend was nowhere to be seen.

As you leaned against the wall, you raised your phone screen to your face as you mindlessly scrolled through various social media feeds and such, trying to pass the time. Ultimately, there’s only so much you can do constantly refreshing pages. On top of that, it might have just been your imagination but people seemed to stop and sneak looks at you, probably wondering why you were staying by yourself in a corner for so long.

Putting your phone away, you decided to approach some of Daishou’s friends - after all, the least he could do was to hang out with you at the party he kind of forced you to go to. Taking a quick look around the room, your eyes landed on a group of boys hanging out on the couches, you recognized them as your boyfriend’s friends. You greeted them as best as you could over the loud music, almost pounding your eardrums.

“I was just wondering, have you seen Daishou anywhere?” As soon as you mentioned his name, that atmosphere within the group grew tense. They all seemed to avoid eye-contact and some even started fidgeting. Suddenly, one of the boys spoke up.

“I- uhm, I think I saw him go upstairs?” He was met with pointed looks from the rest. Confused, you thanked them nonetheless and located the stairs.

Maneuvering your way through the many bodies on the stairs, you start searching through the many rooms of the house as you think to yourself: Who’s house is this? Why are there so many rooms? You must’ve looked through the first 4 rooms of the hallway (bathroom, storage closet, bedroom, bedroom) before reaching another door.

When you opened the door, thankful it wasn’t locked, you immediately saw two figures in a bed in the middle of the room. Upon closer inspection, you saw that they were very much not having a nap together but instead moving in tandem. You were about to exit before they could see you when one of the figures, a girl, locked eyes with you. She immediately fumbled and pushed the other figure, a boy, off of her and drew the sheets to cover herself. Feeling awkward and frozen in place, you started to spew out apologies. 

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry, I, uhm,” you hands out in a defensive motion “I didn’t mean to walk in! I was just…” You trailed off when the boy turned around and you got a good look of his face. It was then when you had realized it was your boyfriend in a bed with his ex-girlfriend, Mika. 

“Suguru…” Your face morphed into a disheartened expression, “You’re…” you couldn’t finish your sentence though, your eyes frantically shifting between Daishou and Mika, who you had just realized the identity of, in confusion as you opened your mouth to say something, but the words lay stuck in your throat. Fat tears welled up in your eyes, eventually falling down your cheeks, but you had yet to move. 

“y/n! It’s not what you think!” Your boyfriend started as he moved off of the bed and towards you, fumbling for an explanation, but his lack of clothes told you everything. No matter what excuse he came up with, the intentions were clear. 

You choked up and you pushed him away. “Save it! We’re through!” Your voice wavered as you turned and ran out the door, covering your mouth with your hands in an attempt to stifle your crying. Unfortunately, you moved to hide in the bathroom to gather your thoughts, gripping the door handle and pushing when you realized it was locked. 

You looked around for something, you weren’t really quite sure what, but you knew you needed to be away from your boyfriend (ex-boyfriend, you reminded yourself) no matter what. In the heat of the moment, you stumbled your way downstairs and into the dining room. It was completely empty, which came as a surprise, but you realized it was probably because the living room was big enough for everyone to do what they wanted and the food was spread out in the kitchen and living room. 

You managed to take a second to catch a break. You were about to take your phone out to call an Uber when you heard Daishou calling your name. In a moment of panic, your eyes landed on the dining table in the middle of the room. Swiftly, and with less gravitas than you’d like to admit, you crawled under the table, thanking the lords above that it was covered in a table cloth that reached the floor. An interesting style choice? Sure, but you were thankful nonetheless.

Holding your breath, you heard your name being called before you heard footsteps leave the room. So there you were, crying under a table at a party. You could still hear the loud techno and pop music from the other room, albeit muffled, and let it drown out your sorrows. 

You thought of calling an Uber now, but you figured it would be smart to take the time to let your thoughts regroup so you at least stopped crying hysterically. 

***

“Please, Kenma?!” Kuroo pouted as he clasped his hands together, “C’mon, it’s not gonna be that bad, it’ll be really fun!” Kenma sighed. He looked down at his paused game of MonHun and took note of the time.

3:51pm.

It was nearing 4pm and Kenma still had yet to clear this level. “I already told you, I don’t wanna go,” Kenma started, “I don’t like parties.” That had Kuroo bouncing and flailing around.

“But Terushima always throws the best parties, they’re fun for everyone!” Kenma grunted in response, he had started playing his game again, Kuroo narrowed his eyes and pouted even harder. “Pleeease?! Everyone’s gonna be there, it’s gonna be great! But it won’t be fun without you,” Kuroo pleaded. Kenma scoffed at that, he considered agreeing just so shut Kuroo up, but he wanted to know what he was getting into first.

“Who’s gonna be there?” Kenma asked, not looking up from his PSP.

“Everyone!” Kenma thought it was almost comical how Kuroo immediately perked up. Kenma shot him an incredulous look. “Uhm, okay, so I know Bo’s gonna be there, which means Akaashi’s gonna be there… You can hang out with him!” Kenma hummed, only partially listening, “No, you’re right, you’re right! What was I thinking? Obviously Akaashi’s gonna hang out with Bokuto, which means I’m gonna have to third wheel!” He tuned Kuroo out as he went on.

Just as Kenma had lost another round, Kuroo seemed to have finished his rant about being a third-wheel and the dynamics between Bokuto and Akaashi.

“Um, well, I mean pretty much all of the Volleyball teams are gonna be there, Terushima really wants this to be epic! Uhm, other than that… Oh! Isn’t there that girl? I forgot her name but she’s dating… Daishou…” Kuroo shudders, Kenma hummed in response. “She’s in your class isn’t she? What’s her name, you can hang out with her!” 

“y/n.” Kenma offered, still not looking up from his game. 

“Yeah, that’s it! Ugh, she’s kinda strange… like, Daishou? Really? Last time I saw him, he was wearing that ugly sweater…” Kenma tuned him out once again. 

While Kenma continued his game, he subconsciously pondered on your relationship. You guys had never really been close, save for the occasional group and partner projects you guys did together, as was expected, you were in the same class after all. If Kenma was being honest, the only time he paid you any mind was when Kuroo brought up how Daishou was most definitely blackmailing you into dating him or something or the sort.

Fed up with Kuroo’s whining, Kenma spoke up after another round lost. “Kuro, I’ll go to the party,” Kuroo’s eyes widened as he gasped, sporting a surprised smile, Kenma continued, “But if I get bored or stressed, I’m leaving.” 

Kuroo nodded.

***

Needless to say, Kenma wasn’t having a good time. While he did enjoy seeing his friend, Hinata, again, the loud and, quite frankly, annoying music was starting to hurt his ears and the food provided was decent at best, meaning fast food pizza and about a million different bags of chips.

“Kenma! C’mon, get over here! We’re playing beer pong, I need a partner!” Kenma sighed as he heard Kuroo call out to him. From where he was leaning against a wall, he could see Kuroo, Bokuto and Miya Atsumu setting up red solo cups on a table. 

This had been happening all night, Kenma minding his own business, occasionally engaging in conversation with Hinata or Akaashi if they crossed paths, with Kuroo swooping in to try to get him to play some sort of party game with him. The first was Just Dance, which Kenma avoided by saying he was hungry, next came truth or dare, Kenma used the bathroom excuse on that one, and so on and so forth. The cycle continued, Kuroo hunting down Kenma and Kenma finding any way he could escape. 

That led Kenma to this moment: leaning against a wall in the kitchen playing on his PSP, with Kuroo struggling to maneuver around everyone to get to him. Kenma checks the digital clock on his PSP. 

9:46pm.

That seemed like a good time to leave, Kenma thought. As he was pocketing his PSP to get ready to make a dash for it, Kenma panicked for a moment, realizing that to get to the front door, he would have to pass by Kuroo and the beer pong table. Contemplating for a moment, he concluded that he would much rather wait it out and leave a bit later than have to explain why he was leaving. 

When Kenma came to his senses, he realized Kuroo was even closer to him than he thought. Scanning for options, he ran the only direction he could, through the arch connecting the kitchen with the dining room. 

In a moment of desperation, he ducked under the table cloth.

***

You checked yourself again in your phone camera. Thankfully, you had calmed down and stopped crying hysterically, and were only left with the occasional sniffle. Unfortunately, the redness was still very much present, as were the tears when you thought too hard about Daishou. Despite all the nasty things other people, especially in your school, would say about him, he was a kind person, passionate about many things and was very caring towards you: always cheering you up and lending an ear when you needed to vent. 

I guess he just… really liked Mika, then, huh, you thought to yourself as you hugged your knees close to your chest.

Deep in your thoughts, you hadn’t noticed the frantic footsteps making their way towards you. You only realized something was off when the table cloth rustled and was lifted open, only for someone to slip in and under the table with you.

The boy seemed to be catching his breath when you made a startled noise of surprise. Hearing it, the boy snapped his head up to meet your stare. You were both just staring at each other with wide eyes, after a moment you both started fumbling out uhms and i’s, glancing around to avoid eye contact. 

After accidentally looking up at each other at the same time, you realized who the boy was.

“Wait… Kenma?” He blinked.

“y/n?” He responded with a tilt of his head, “Uhm, I’m sorry, I was just… trying to get away from someone…” You shifted in your spot, casting your eyes away in embarrassment hoping he wouldn’t see your red face and stray tears. “What about you?”

“Hm?” Your eyes widened in confusion.

“Why are you, uh,” he paused awkwardly and gestured around vaguely, “What’re you doing under a table?” You didn’t really know how to respond to that.

“Uhm… well,” you felt tears welling up in your eyes again, “I-” a sob wracked through your body. Completely overwhelmed with emotions, you burst into tears. Kenma’s eyes shifted frantically before he regained his composure, he had never really been good and expressing emotions or helping others with theirs.

Kenma thought to himself: What would Kuro do in this situation? Sure, Kenma had gotten upset lots of times, and Kuroo always knew how to help. He realized that one thing that Kuroo did was ask him if he wanted to talk about what was going on - of course, Kenma never did, but for some strange, unknown reason, it made him feel just the tiniest bit better. In the back of his mind, Kenma thought that it made him feel better because it told him there was someone who cared about him.

“Do you, uh, wanna talk about it? Maybe?” He winced at his awkward delivery, his hands fidgeting.

“Is that,” you sniffled, “is that okay?” Kenma tried his best to give a reassuring smile, he was sure it came off as strained.

“Yeah, sure.”

You told Kenma about your relationship with Daishou; how it started, all the ups and downs, and finally how it ended. How you kept having chance encounters: at school when you were out shopping and even late one night at a public library - that was the night he asked you out for the first time, and you couldn’t have been more smitten. 

During your relationship, he was so kind and considerate to you, and he never failed to make you laugh. You told Kenma how he even said that despite going to different schools, there was no one else he'd rather be that: that apparently didn’t stop him from hooking up with another girl.

After you went silent, Kenma found that you were finished. Despite only thinking of you as ‘that other girl in his class that was dating a volleyball player Kuroo hated’ until recently, seeing you cry and pour your heart out gave him a strange, internal attachment to you.

“Do you wanna get out of here?” Kenma asked suddenly, turning to you and planting a hand on the floor, learning towards you ever so slightly. You blinked.

“What?” Surprised by his own outburst, Kenma decided to roll with it.

“There’s an arcade a few blocks down… sometimes when I get upset, I go there and it always cheers me up?” To be perfectly honest, Kenma wasn’t really expecting you to say yes. He expected you to brush him off, say you were feeling better and ready to go home. 

Kenma himself didn��t know why he asked, he usually didn’t really like spended excess time with people he didn’t know that well, but subconsciously, there was a part of him that wanted to help.

“Oh, uhm, yeah! Sure, why not?” You metally cursed yourself for your stuttering, it was bad enough you were info-dumping and completely oversharing, you didn’t want Kenma to think you were that weak. You sniffled again, realization dawning on you.

“We gotta find a way out of here first, thought.” You said. Kenma cringed. 

***

Long story short, you and Kenma managed to escape the table without anyone seeing you. You were extremely thankful, as it would have been very awkward if someone saw the two of you crawling out from under a table. 

Getting outside was another thing, thought. Kuroo and the beer pong table were still very much blocking the way out, and there was always the risk of bumping into Daishou again. After a bit of asking around, you found out that there was a backdoor in the kitchen, so you and Kenma were able to make your escape. 

Now you were playing away to your hearts’ content to some random racing game at an arcade. You both were playing side-by-side, versing each other. To no one’s surprise, Kenma was beating you. Deep down, though, Kenma was a little impressed you were able to keep up with him so well, being a religious player of Mario Kart himself and all. 

You both fleeted from game to game, playing almost every game available from shooting games to claw machines to even a Space Invaders-esque game. You had managed to earn a good amount of tickets, all thanks to Kenma’s membership card and the loose tokens he found in his wallet.

Eventually, you had played until the arcade was empty and one of the employees came up to you to tell you they were closed. They did mention that you could still buy some prizes if you wanted to, to which Kenma turned to you.

“Do you want to?” 

Over the time you had spent playing games together, you had gotten to know Kenma better than just ‘the quiet boy in your class��� in between passing conversations and empty, teasing threats, some of your favorites had been: I will steal your kneecaps and If you play with that character you don’t deserve rights.

“Yeah, sure!” You replied, a genuine smile crossed your face. 

In the end, you had gotten a keychain with a mini funko character on it and Kenma settled on a cute sticker that, with much encouragement from you, he stuck on the case of his PSP.

After exiting the arcade, Kenma took a moment to glance over at you. The empty street illuminated by semi-faulty lampposts, and he found it showed your face more clearly than all the neon lights of the arcade. Your tears dried up, although there were still hints of red in splotches on your face. 

As he watched you talk excitedly about your new keychain, he couldn’t help but feel a strange way, an unfamiliar feeling he had never felt before. It was warm in a way, something akin to stepping home for the first time after being away for so long. It was weird, in all the years he had known you, or been partnered up with you for whatever, he had never thought of you as anything other than a random classmate. However, after everything you had both gone through together that night, something new was forming.

Little did Kenma know, you were thinking the same. You noticed the little things about him; you thought back to how his nose would scrunch when he would mess up in a game or you would surpass him in something, or how his eyes lit up and almost sparkled ever so slightly when he was picking out stickers. Now that you were outside, you could see how his dyed hair swayed gently in the crisp November wind, or how his eyes would somewhat crinkle as he laughed when you made a joke.

After a few moments of silence, you spoke up. 

“Hey, so, I didn’t really get to eat at the party… Do you maybe wanna get something to eat nearby?” You asked, turning your head to Kenma. Realizing how that sounded like you were asking him on a date, you quickly stuttered out “Of course, you don’t have to! We can just get a small snack or, or maybe we don’t have to get anything!” You laughed awkwardly as Kenma showed no obvious emotions, however his eyes were slightly widened and his cheeks growing more red, but you chalked that up to the colder weather and surprise. 

Kenma suddenly remembered how he didn’t get a chance to eat as well, but in all the games you guys were playing, he didn’t get a chance to feel hungry. Realizing he had not responded, he quickly thought of a place to get food, his mind immediately wandering to 7/11.

“Oh yeah, sure. There’s a 7/11 down the street, if you want?” He said, and you were off.

***

Sitting in the 7/11 with Kenma under the fluorescent lights was oddly comforting. You were happily eating your warm soba noodles (topped with tempura) as Kenma ate his apple pastry (having already eaten half of an egg salad sandwich and wrapping the rest for later) as you engaged in mindless conversation, Kenma periodically pulling out his PSP to either play or check on things. 

During some random conversation about a new game Kenma was playing, you noticed him occasionally glancing behind you. Eventually, you looked behind you to see what looked like a newly installed slushie machine, touchscreen and all. Realizing Kenma wouldn’t speak up about it, you decided to take charge.

“Do you wanna get slushies?” You said with a grin. Kenma looked surprised for a second before lightly laughing.

“Sure.”

Over the machine, you tapped the screen to get a strawberry lemonade slushie, while Kenma opted for cherry one.

Slushies didn’t exactly pair well with warm soba, but tonight was apparently a night full of surprise, what with finding out about your boyfriend (ex, you reminded yourself), not to mention these spontaneous adventures with a random boy who was, you thought, not so random anymore.

“Wanna have a competition?” Kenma’s voice interrupted your train of thought, “Let’s see who can drink theirs the fastest.” You grinned.

“You’re on!”

After Kenma counted down, you both tried to down your slushie. Halfway through, though, you had to stop.

“Ah! Brainfreeze!” You exclaimed, clutching your head with one hand. Kenma also stopped drinking and laughed, “My head feels so numb, argh!” You hummed. “At least now I won’t think of Daishou anymore… My brain feels like it’s pounding like, like it’s having a rave or something!” It was getting late, meaning you were dangerously close to your stage of drowsiness that caused you to infodump like crazy. Kenma’s smile dropped every so slightly. 

“Hey, uhm,” he looked as though he was looking for the right words to say, “I’m really sorry about what happened, uh,” he scratched the back of his head nervously, “Sorry, I’m not great at… feelings… but, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.” 

You blinked for a second before smiling. 

“Thanks, Kenma.”

As you were finishing up the rest of your slushie, you turned to Kenma.

“Hey, uhm, I know this is pretty random but do you want to be my partner for the project we’re doing in science?” Kenma looked up from his PSP and stared at you, as if trying to remember what you were talking about, “The one about incomplete dominance and sex-linked traits? The teacher said you had to find a partner of the opposite gender so you could create a ‘hypothetical baby’, which, honestly, I find kinda dumb… Like, if the baby’s just hypothetical, then you could partner up with anyone, right? It’s not just me that feels that way?” 

Kenma remembered what project you were talking about, but he really enjoyed when you would continue on these rants. Being one to not talk that much, he liked how you were able to fill in the silence, although the times when you would be eating and he would be playing in silence were not as awkward as he thought, they weren’t awkward at all. 

“So… Do you want to pair up?” Kenma flushed, realizing he was mindlessly listening to you talk.

“Oh, uhm, yeah, sure.” You beamed.

bonus: you did your project on incomplete dominance and sex-linked traits and learned about the wonders of co-dominance in blood types. also kuroo was very worried about kenma leaving and thought he got kidnapped by a van that said ‘free games’ but it was all cool when he learnt kenma left with a girl ;)

[amjustagirl]

im so sorry but this is gonna be really long 😭 i know it's a bit late but i just read a sea of flowers in bloom because i got busy while waiting for it to finish (im too impatient to read on going series') and i really need to let this all out. i apologize for bad grammar and vocabulary in advance—im still crying

first i wanna say that you captured all the emotions so well. i cried reading every single chapter (because i was either sad, hurt, or proud). the way you wrote it was so beautifully expressive and described, i couldn't help but hold onto every word you wrote. your writing style never ceases to amaze and enchant me.

moving forward tho, i love how the story really captured how an individual's insecurities and self perception affect how they make their choices and how their relationships play out. i think that's something that's greatly overlooked yet so important to remember (both when evaluating yourself and the actions of others). i also love how you also showcased the importance of communication, not just with your partner/potential partner but also the release of emotions and the troubles we don't notice we have.

you managed to highlight the importance of being open to change and learning how to rely on yourself for happiness and i think you wrote that so beautifully—it felt so real and raw. i was so proud of mc for slowly realizing how much power she holds over her own happiness and it was so realistic how she found the strength to move forward when Kaiyo needed her the most—because that's what a sense of responsibility, indebtedness, and most importantly love does. Their friendship is beautiful and it's wonderfully executed.

i love how you dedicated a whole chapter to how kita feels and his thought process (tho it isn't surprising since you do give both perspectives in all your other stories) and how he came into terms with the fact that he wanted to try—he's going to try because he wants her. i also love how you implied that communication took time for them and how it's a conscious effort on both parts. there's also the fact that they have their own little 'ritual' of saying "It's because you love my voice" for when they need confidence to say what's on their minds,,, ma'am pls u made me cry more with how soft and meaningful that is, how your love for someone will give you courage and confidence because they love something about you or how you do something. it's just so real.

it really is beautifully written story about two people who learn that there's someone out there that will love them for the people that they are.

there's so much more I'd like to say, but i think this is enough for now. Thank you so much for sharing your writing with us, you're truly so talented. I can't wait to read your future work and reread all your other stories! I hope you stay safe always and get a good amount of rest!

much love, yenyen <3

ps. congrats on your new job! go get that raise 😩 still can't believe there are decent bosses in this world tho HAHAHAHA

yenyen! *blows kisses in your direction, gently wipes yr tears away*

right so - pls don't ever apologise for length or grammar or wtv - i love love your ask, and i think i must've read it at least ten times ehehe and i shld be the one to apologise for answering this so late!

i think i started off wanting to write this as a simple love story with the v handsome, v wonderful kita shinsuke, but i just wasn't satisfied with how kita's oftentimes depicted as the perfect man (i mean i personally love reading fics like that - e.g. @inarizahki drabbles never fail to make me hoot and fall in love) and i wanted for my own fic, to delve in deeper, dig into his psyche, his insecurities, his fears. and so while doing that, i developed the reader's own journey, her own fears and insecurities paralleling his, and how their choices make them grow and make their relationship eventually not just possible, but very, very fruitful ;)

hahaha now im worried im gonna be predictable (but i do love writing both perspectives in my fics!! good spot there hoho) but it is so true. marriage has taught me that communication is key, bcos good intentions can only get you so far. it's not an easy thing for either of them to learn, but like you said - their love gives them confidence, their love builds trust, and that little ritual - talk to me, because i love the sound of your voice is just...something that spoke to me and i felt like that would really be the cornerstone of their eventual relationship, because miscommunications really derailed their early friendship and courtship.

and the reader's friendship with kaiyo. y'know i was worried that...i might bore ppl bcos kaiyo is my own character, and we're here to read romance HAHAHA but it's just so impt to me to write women supporting women and healthy female friendships so they really have each other's backs, and it's just such a meaningful moment to me when the reader realises that she's got to buck the fuck up when kaiyo's down for the count and ugh. i love the both of them.

oh gosh i'm glad you love my other works too!!!! i feel like each work of mine in the storm chaser universe is kinda different in tone, but it's just fun tying them all together :)

p.s. yeah like - i didn't know i cld get out there and fight for that raise, and get a healthier work environment with nicer bosses but wanting to pull my weight in my marriage really motivated me HAHAHAHA. fingers crossed it turns out well, but ty for the well wishes bb <3

[alexiaugustin]

you can be all uwu poor 16 yo child but then can't expect lucas who's like what 1 year older to be an adult who never fucks up... you're babying lola and shitting on people who do the same for lucas. not everyone has to like someone as selfish as lola and make excuses for her just because she's a female character

babe it's so wonderful just how much you are missing my point right now and how much you are once again proving my point that nobody in this fandom is allowed to have their own opinions as long as they concern the cis white mlm characters. the thing i was talking about was how the fandom views/bashes lola compared to how the fandom has been treating lucas ever since season one. so the fact that you must have felt so offended about this post and then went ahead and turned it into a discourse about how lola is a bitch n lucas can do whatever he wants because he has abandonment issues seem like a YOU problem because i wasn't even talking about the characters and who was more valid for doing what they did on the show🤪🤪

but okay!! take a seat, drink some tea and here are a list of quotes from my own posts that i've made during the last 24 hours so let's see if the points you made in your ask are actually valid criticism of my post or if you very simply lack reading comprehension😍

you can be all uwu poor 16 yo child but then can't expect lucas who's like what 1 year older to be an adult who never fucks up...

>”ofc im not out here blaming everything that went wrong on lucas like the whole situation was nuanced amd neither of them was right nor were they completely wrong”

you're babying lola and shitting on people who do the same for lucas

>”there are almost always times when i dislike or just can't stand a character at one moment and like that's completely normal”

>”lucas used to be my comfort character in 2019 so this is absolutely nothing against ppl who like them like that's fine!!”

>”she wasn't allowed to mess up. she wasn't allowed to be a multi-faceted character. she wasn't allowed to grow, heal, learn & apologize. she wasn't on the show but she also clearly wasn't in the fandom and the only thing ppl cared about was that lucas would have a chance to "go off" on her and be "hot"🤪”

not everyone has to like someone as selfish as lola and make excuses for her just because she's a female character

>”you didn't even have to like lola at all but as you said a lil bit respect would have been cool... haha🤪”

>”my point in the first place was more about how lola was treated in the fandom and how quickly ppl were to cancel her and call her a bitch when Lucas got away with.... the same amount of shit”

>”you weren't obligated to lover her because she was the main character or to even like her because she was a character on the show at all. but a little. just a little empathy and understanding for a mentally ill sixteen year old teenager is smth that i would have actually expected in a fandom where most people are even older than i am.”

so in conclusion.... thank you for trying to defend someone so hard by purposely misinterpreting all of my posts and just erasing the parts from your brain where i was proving you wrong about your arguments against me. you lack reading comprehension and im much rather on the flipside of the coin where i at least have a very basic understanding of other people and what they are going through and would be decent enough of a person to let someone who's going through it right now sleep in my bed and not yell at my girlfriend for caring about her!! very glad that that's me rip to all the people who wouldn't but please leave this blog then. thank you!😍😍

[andrcs]

hey  friends  waddup  !  i’m  jen  ,  just  turned  23  (  n  am  already  feelin  it  )  ,  from  the  gmt-2  tmz  ,  n  i  go  by  she/her  pronouns  .  i  had  about  ,  like  ,  half  an  hour  of  sleep  today n  i’m  actually  redoing  this  entire  intro  because  as   i  was  editing  the  finished  version  to  post  it  ,  i  accidentally  deleted  the  whole  thing  n  tumblr  wouldnt  let  me  have  it  back !  it’s  fine  i’m  fine   :-)  anywho  i’m  gonna  let  yall  go  n  learn a  lil  more  about  our  friend  andre !  hopefully  u  like  him  but  if  u  don’t  thats  ok  bc  sometimes i don’t  either !!

𝐈.    𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐒  :

𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞   :   andre  harris  solomon  .

𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞   :   n/a  .

𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐚𝐲   :   august  fourth  ,  1991  .

𝐳𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐜 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧   :   leo  .

𝐨𝐜𝐜𝐮𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧   :  cco  of  solo  conglomerate  .

𝐈𝐈.   𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃  :

during  the  solomon’s  dynasty  ,   the  family  had  its  fair  share  of  tumbles  and  quite  a  few  scandals  .  great  uncle  abel being  arrested  after  trying  to  steal  half  his  brother’s  fortune  was  one   was  a  big  example .  may  god  bless  the traitous  bastard’s  soul  .  also  cousin  denzel  ,  declaring   in  the  middle  of  thanksgiving  dinner  he  wanted  to  be  a  opera  singer  ,  of  all  fucking  things  ,  and  giving grandpa  harrison  an  almost  stroke  ,  could  be  counted  .  no  matter  what  ,  though  ,  nothing  prepared  the  family  to  watch  the  solomon  fortune’s  heiress  coming  home  on  her  christmas  break  during  her  freshman  year  in  college  with  a  baby  bump  and  no  father  to  claim  the  child  she  carried  . 

in  the  following  years  ,  with  the  slightly  judgemental  help  of  all  of  her  closest  relatives  ,  but  most  of  all  ,  the  never  ending  support  of  her  parents  ,  gaia  solomon  managed  not  only  to  get  her  college  diploma  ,  enter  the  family  business   and  help  solo  grow  into  the  biggest  media  conglomerate  of  the  western  hemisphere  ,  one  that  had  a  solid  hand  over  pretty  much  all  aspects  of  media  and  entertainment  .  chances  are  if  you  wanted  to  publish  or  sign  a  record  label  deal  or  be  on  a  tv  show  ,  sooner  or  later  you  would  encounter  someone  from  solo  .  but   she  had  also  manage  to  raise  with  the  utmost  love  and  care  ,  no  lack  of  sacrifices  ,  and  a  healthy  amount  of  ear-pulling  ,  a  man  she  can’t  help  to  be  most  proud  of  .

andre  solomon  never  knew  who  his  father  was  ,  or  cared  to .  and  as  far  as  his  mother  was  concerned  ,  he  didn’t  have  a  father .  as  a  child  ,  he  never  felt  like  he  was  missing  anything  in  life  ,  there  was  no  angry  void  aching  to  be  filled  ,  no  painful  moments  to  remember  his  childhood  by  .  he  had  been  happy .   no  matter  how  busy  his  mom  was  ,  she  was  always  loving  and  attentive  whenever she  was  around  ,  played  baseball and  football  and  soccer  with  him  whenever  he  asked  her  to  ,  and  grandpa  harrison  was  always  available  if  the  boy  ever  needed  a  guy  figure  in  his  life .  of  course  ,  there  were  some  bumps  and  bruises  along  the  way  ,  and  a  pinky  finger  he  never  fully  got  the  feeling  back  , but  it  was  a  beautiful  ,  fulfilling  childhood  .

as  a  teenager  ,  recently  acquainted  with  a  never  seen  before  freedom  ,  and  just  out  of  puberty  ,  andre  grew  more  acquainted  with  getting  in  trouble  .  thankfully  ,  nothing  like  cousin  gina  , who  had  to  cut  off  a  part  of  her  ear  after  piercing  it  by  herself  with  her  tenth  grade  friends  .  while  rambunctious  and  mischievous  ,  he  was  always  to  smart  to  get  caught  doing  something  that  could  get  him  in  any  kind  of  real  trouble  ,  and  by  then  ,  the  family  knew  that  they  could  trust  andre  to  not  be  too  irresponsible  ,  and  even  if  they  didn’t  ,  at  least  he  had  both  ears  intact  .

 a  full  grown  adult  ,  after  getting  his  marketing  degree in  northwestern  university  ,  andre  followed  his  mother’s  footsteps  and  worked  hard  to  climb  the  organizational   ladder  and  reach  the  cco  position ,  becoming  one  of  his  grandfather’s   valued  advisors  along  the  way  .  these  days  ,  he  works  hard  to  keep  his  image  clean  and  his  professional  life  very  well  separated  from  his  private  one  ,  being  very  succesful  at  it  thus  far  .

𝐈𝐈𝐈.   𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘  :

andre can  definitely  be  considered  a  little bit   too  cocky  in  his  confidence  .  he  knows  his  strengths  and  doesn’t  believe  in  fake  humility  ,  always  eager  to  be  praised  by  whatever  actions  .  also  very  focused  ,  he  feels  as  if  he  knows  exactly  what  he  deserves  in  all  aspects  of  his  life  ,  and  doesn’t  hesitate  to  work  for  it  until  he’s  satisfied .

he  is also  ,  however  ,  a  very  fun  loving  individual  .  andre  believes  in  the  motto  work  hard  ,  play  hard  .  and  you  can  definitely  find  him  going  on  expensive  trips  to  exotic  locations  or   some  rich  person  adventure  more  often  that  he’d  like  to  admit  .  is  constantly  surrounded  by  a-list  celebrities  or  clout  chasers  who  attach  to  him  due  to  his  connections  into  the  industry  .  and  as  being  the   center  of  attention   is  one  of  his  favorite  things  ,  he  absolutely  adores  it  .

very  ,   extremely  sarcastic  and  definitely  not  the  most  outwardly  affectionate  person  ,  it  takes  a  lot  to  get  him  to  soften  up   ,   but  andre’s  also  extremely  loyal  to  those  he  knows  are  his  real  friends ,  and  always  makes  sure  that  they  are  with  him  no  matter  where  he  goes  and  what  he  gets  .

is  known  to  be  quite  the  ladies’  man  ,  and  often  lives  up  to  the  reputation  ,  even  though  he’s  settled  down  quite  happily  a  few  times  during  his  adulthood  .  he’s  not  averse  to  relationships ,  per say  ,  but  also  doesnt  want  to  jump  in  carelessly  ,  specially  when  he’s  not  felling  the  situation  .  is  frequently  engaged  in  some  sort  of  drama  with  the  girls  in  his  life  and  even  though  he  claims  to  dislike  it  ,  he  loves  all the  attention  he  gets  from  them  ( ew , i  hate  him  ,  he’s  gross  )

𝐈𝐕.   𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒  :

childhood  best  friend  /  chicago  native  ( 1 / 2 )  :  people  who’ve  known  him  since  before  he  hit  puberty  and  became  cool  and  who  are  with  him til  this  very  day  .  they  might  not  be  best  friends  for  whatever  reason  but  still  are  closer than  most  friendships  out  there . ( pearl , )

flings /  could  be  past  or  present  :  could  also  range  from  the  silliest  to  the  most  angsty  stuff  ,  andre  definitely  has  the  repertoire  for  it .

ride  or  dies  (  2 / 6  )  :  truly  ride  or  dies  ,  his  closest  group  of  friends  ,  the  ppl  that  are with  him  no  matter where  he  is  and  the only  people  outside  his  family  he’d  do  whatever for  . ( devin , watson )

exes  /  chicago  native  (  2 /  2  )  :  i  have  some  ideas  about  them  but  lets  just  say  one  would  have  ended  in  decently  good terms  and  one  would  not . ( vera , aurora )

friend  with  interests  (  0 / 2  )  : andre  has  a  lot  of  ins  with  the  media  industry  ,  and  this  person  would  definitely  have  an  ulterior  motive  to  hang  around  him  ,  whether  he’s  realised  it  yet  or  no  .

flirtationship   (  1 / 1  )  : first  of  all  i  hate  that  word  my  GOD  but  also  ,  would  be  a  kind  of  thing  where  they’d  both  be  feeling  each  other  but  for  some  reason  things  just  wouldn’t  progress ? ( elissa )

there is a  lot  more  but  i’ve  just  written  this  thing  twice  in  a  row  n  my  brain  is  currently  just  2  neurons  barely  communicating  so  i  should  probably  quit  while  i’m  ahead  ?  but  pls  message  me  bc  if  u  want  to  know  some  more  about  andre  or  come  up w  plots  or  just  talk  about  how  hot mbj  is   n  how  unfair  it  is  that  the rpc  doesnt  gif  him nearly  enough  ?  or  we  could  also  talk  abt  something  i  might  be  delusional  rn  so  i  have  a bunch  of  interesting  topics  ok  bye  thanks  for  sticking  around i  love uuuu

[sunsetsover]

i’d love to read one of your posts about ben’s actions tonight? like, we all understand /why/ but you have such a lovely way with words and i like pain. thanks 🥺

thank you, you’re so sweet!! usually i like to answer asks in order but imma let u skip the queue just this once bc this one’s time sensitive and ur so nice 🥺

so……. where do i even begin w this……..

the thing is ben has such horrible self esteem issues and a lot of ppl (both characters on the show and ppl in the audience) don’t realize that bc he comes across as very confident and bold and unfazed by anything, but the thing is….. that’s a front…….. he is not confident, he is not bold (not when it really matters) and he’s affected by pretty much everything. like massively so. what other people think of him - particularly people he cares about - affects not only how he sees himself, but also how he behaves. he seems to almost want to be a self fulfilling prophecy - remember how everyone thought it was ben who hit phil over the head, so ben was like ‘well seeing as though everyone thinks i tried to kill him, i might as well actually do it’?? yeah. he’s very susceptible to allowing other people’s opinions on him dictate his opinions of himself, as well as the course of action he ends up taking.

so it’s very easy to see how that lead to what happened with callum and their date. ian making a comment about it? well ben gives back as good as he gets, and this is ian we’re talking about, who is as obtuse as they come. but you see as ben leaves the beale’s that despite seeming unbothered by it, that comment actually got to him. it got him thinking: what if ian was right? what if he has a point? literally ben was already doubting himself after a snide comment from ian, that’s how affected he is by other people’s opinions (and also that’s how much he cares about callum!). and then you’ve got jay piling on top of that, and ok maybe his comments were innocuous and maybe he had a point, but with what ian had already said? the doubts really start taking hold. like maybe ian isn’t just full of shit, not if jay’s thinking the same thing - jay, who probably knows ben better than anyone. so maybe he and callum aren’t right for each other. maybe they won’t work.

and then you’ve got stuart who just puts the giant fucking nail in the coffin. he sets the disaster snowball rolling down the hill. and he does it in a really clever, manipulative way too (it’s a similar type of manipulation we see ben use on callum when he sold him that van!): he disarmed ben with an apology and with this newfound openmindedness, offers ben an olive branch by saying ‘i care about callum and i think you do too’ - essentially lowering ben’s guard - and then goes in with the ‘bad things happen around you so you need to stay away from callum because i don’t want happened to paul to happen to him’. and that undoubtedly completely fucks ben up - we didn’t even really need ian and jay putting doubts in his head before that tbh, i think what stuart said would have been enough to screw ben up on it’s own. and you know, i think even with ian and jay’s comments, if stuart hadn’t said what he said they might’ve been alright. ben might be a little bit off, but it probably would have been recoverable. but as soon as paul was mentioned - as soon as what happened to paul was mentioned - it was all bets off the table. we’ve seen how much paul’s death still affects ben, how much he still blames himself. so to have stuart basically insinuate that yeah, what happened to paul was somehow because of ben and that the same thing might happen to callum - someone that ben obviously really cares about - again because of ben? it was game over. stuart softened him up then went right for ben’s rawest spot. like how the fuck was he supposed to recover from that in a matter of hours?

and yeah, he probably should have done the decent thing and just cancelled. but that’s not how ben’s brain works. ee have already established that doing this exact thing is a pattern of behaviour for ben - he broke up w the guy he was seeing (that he was into!) in newcastle for the exact same reason he purposely sabotaged his date with callum: because he ‘had to, because if anything had got, like, serious, then [ben] would have ruined his life’. those are ben’s exactwords. now who does that sound like? what kind of paranoia is that kind of thinking feeding into? this is what ben thinks about himself. this is what ben worries he’s going to do to the men in his life. like this is what ben does!!! which is why it really surprised me that some ppl thought his behaviour yesterday was OOC. it seems to me that if anything this behaviour is perfectly in line with both his character and his previous actions. and to be perfectly honest, i think if ben hadn’t tried to deliberately fuck it up now, then he probably would have eventually. at least if he’s doing this right at the very beginning the two of them have a chance of working through it.

so why didn’t ben just cancel? well callum would’ve wanted an explanation. and what could ben have said, when he had been so up for it until then? ‘sorry, a few people have talked some sense into me and i realized i like you too much to ruin your life’? that wouldn’t have worked. ‘i changed my mind’? callum’s gonna ask why. ‘something came up’? callum might ask for another date. and ben clearly likes callum quite a bit, and he knows as well as we do that if callum had asked him out again, he probably wouldn’t have been able to say no. so he thinks: i have to break this until there’s no chance of recovery. i need to destroy any chance there is for us, get rid of any interest callum has in me. i need to make him angry at me, because then he’ll stay away from me. i need to make him hate me, because if he hates me at least he won’t be hurting. and if i do have to hurt him, it’s better to hurt him now rather than further down the line when it will hurt him ten times more. it’s flawed thinking, obviously, but ben’s a flawed man with a lot of issues and no self esteem who thinks that a) he doesn’t deserve someone like callum and b) that he’ll only end up hurting him, or that callum will end up hurt because of him. so in his own fucked up way, he was really trying to protect callum - from ben himself, and whatever pain ben’ll inevitably (as far as he’s concerned) end up inflicting on him. (and don’t forget paul and what happened to him was now at the forefront of his mind too, so i’m sure that only made him even more determined to make sure he gets callum as far away from him as possible.)

so what does he do? he completely fucking destroys this date. invites other people along, pays callum no attention, makes 0 effort, literally cops off with someone else in plain view and then makes it clear he’s not bothered what callum thinks about it (although it backfired a little bit bc callum’s such a sweetheart and also has no self esteem so he went the ‘no hard feelings’ route which must have infuriated ben bc like no!! he was supposed to kick off!! swear!!! call ben a bastard!!! anything but be so painfully understanding!!!!) and he does all of this to basically fuck their relationship up beyond repair. bc if he does that then callum will be able to move on and find someone else, someone kind and safe and normal who won’t hurt him or fuck it up.

and i know it won’t make sense to some people, but he did all of it with the best intentions. with callum’s feelings in mind, not ben’s own - in fact, ben’s feelings and what he wants are practically redundant in this situation bc he’s so set on doing what he thinks is the best thing for callum. what ben wants and feels about it doesn’t matter.

and he manages to do a pretty good job of ignoring his feelings up until the very end, when he’s essentially alone. then - and only then - do we get to see how fucking upset ben is about the whole thing. like he’s sitting there drinking by himself trying not to cry! he’s fucking heartbroken! because his actions during the date, that wasn’t him wanting to be cruel or vindictive or hurt callum. that was him trying to protect callum (and i know, i know not everyone will understand or agree with that but i promise you that’s exactly what he was trying to do). his own happiness, his own feelings, they don’t matter. he’s fucking devastated, but it doesn’t matter. callum is safe now. he’ll be alright, and as long as callum’s alright, nothing else matters.

and the most telling part of it all? the fact that ben didn’t go home w that guy he’d been kissing earlier. he could have. he so easily could have - the guy was into him, he was up for it, and we know ben’s not opposed to random hook ups. but he didn’t. he wasn’t at all interested. why? because he wanted callum. he caresabout callum. he was just using that guy to make his point - that ben is bad and callum shouldn’t be interested in him bc because he can do better. he had 0 interest in that guy and the minute everyone was gone and no one was around to witness it, ben made that very clear - he didn’t even want fuck him as a rebound or to prove he doesn’t care about callum or whatever. he couldn’t even pretend.

like ben just really cares about callum and that’s exactly why he did what he did - because he thinks that it was the best and kindest thing to do.

idk i just hope that this helps give people a little bit of perspective on why ben did what he did bc i feel like some ppl were kind of unfairly harsh on him. the way he behaved was not at all fair on callum, and i don’t condone what he did, but as someone who has been there myself (not literally the same situation, but the same ‘i need to scare them off now so i don’t hurt them in the long run’ way of thinking) i can confidently say that it was from a place of good intentions. completely twisted and fucked up and unfair, yes, but his heart was (mostly) in the right place.

but yeah lmao i’m glad you like my way with words bc you just got a lot of them!!! and perhaps a lot of pain too lmao 💕💕

[sans-mots]

captain america civil war is on netflix, my tummy hurts and it’s my day off so time to watch it for the first time since I saw it in theatres (I hated it that much tbh, still have only seen age of ultron once)

time to see it again

i like how they custom made a fancy red leather star notebook for the winter soldier’s operational codes

two white ladies wearing shades/baseball cap and drinking coffee not ten feet from each other and talking into thin air?? it would have been much more normal to have them be in a conversation, like expat friends meeting up for coffee, then they’d be noticeable but not weird. geez

steve just stole a dudes gas mask that’s hardcore as all hell. aint give a shit rogers

Nat’s stupid fckin flowy hair she would for real just have a pixie cut, or even her short bob from the first avengers if she actually fought like that all the time. wanda’s makes sense because she’s a long range combatant 

ok i get that rumlow’s mad at cap but wouldn’t his real beef be with sam because sam was the one who literally let a building drop on him

sam is literally the only normal acting person with his little drone I love him

i’m really glad that they actually showed human casualities as important and not just being like oops we blew up some random people who don’t matter like in every other action film

ah yes here’s where it turns into another avengers/iron man film and suddenly tony is the main character ( i love u but go back to your own franchise pls)

tony you do realize just because someone goes to mit that doesnt mean you should fund their project (weapons testing is a thing hmmmm)

alfre woodard being in marvel tv+movies a+++

steve looking beautiful and feeling guilty. wanda too. 

uh why is vision dressed like an accountant

rhodey! but also the close up being on him for new york is ambiguous-sad that ppl died or reminded tony almost died?

god zemo. this plot was so fckin convoluted and stupid. 

th fckin sharon carter speech that didnt make any sense to say at a funeral but only served to further plot

nat+steve hugging a+++

sharon and steve are so awkward there is zero chemistry. and what a waste in an overly packed film. like honestly if they had screentested someone who really had chemistry with him it would at least be worth it

sam and steve’s matching baseball caps and aviators. zero percent subtlety

“I don’t do that anymore.” so defeated oh godddddddddddddddd

“it always ends in a fight” fckin hell

bucky using steve’s shield when its still on his arm a++

tchalla’s claws tho. also i wonder if german special forces would be firing on him if they knew he was the king of wakanda lol

TIME FOR THE MOTORCYCLE FLIP

so turned on by the motorcycle flip. just as good as I thought it would be

rhodey “Congratulations, cap, you’re a criminal” 

“dude shows up dressed like a cat you don’t want to know more?” yess sam

IT LITERALLY MAKES NO SENSE THAT NAT IS ON THE ACCORDS SIDE AND SO SMUG ABOUT IT “technically [the shield] is the government’s property” fuck that writing

“my name is bucky” <3

zemo’s plan is still way too fckin intricate

tony you literally need a suit to fight don’t fckin try to go toe to toe with the winter soldier

the looooove helicopter (lens flare, biceps)

whats with them and falling into bodies of water.

lets use 12 mins of a captain america movie to introduce spiderman... ughhhhh 

how did tony already have a suit for peter parker without knowing the specifications of his powers?

CLIIIINNNT thank you. 

the “move or you will be moved” lady yesssss

ughhhh more sharon and the kiss. WHY YOU KISSIN PEGGY’S NIECE RIGHT AFTER SHE DIE YOU NASTY

that car is not low profile, it’s old.

ummm isn’t antman a convicted felon? isn’t he supposed to like not leave the country?

ughhh nat would so be on steve’s side i hate this arbitrary assignment of her to the accords side

“barnes is mine” tchalla that’s steve’s line

“I don’t know if you’ve been in a fight before but there’s not usually this much talking” I love you sam wilson

ew vision on his fckin high horse again.

“Arrow guy” “tic tac”

ew the fcking new york talk murder me 

YOU ARE PLAYING HOPEFUL MUSIC WHEN IRON MAN’S TEAM IS WINNING AGAINST CAP’S IN HIS OWN MOVIE AND SAD WHEN CAP WINS??? LIKE I KNOW IT’S ALL MORALLY AMBIGUOUS BUT JESUS this is supposed to be CAPTAIN AMERICA: civil war (just like, a reminder, the avengers is supposed to be about all the avengers, not jsut tony)

also t’challa’s kind of an asshole to clint like damn if you wanna be friends with nat you gotta be friends with clint 

OOOO I forgot about nat letting them get to the quinjet

also why does peter parker not know star wars??? isn’t he a loser who goes to science high school???

okay and the whole rhodey thing??? vision was literally going to drop sam out of the sky which could have also potentially killed him--rhodey just got hit instead. you can be upset about it but it’s literally not sam’s fault for NOT WANTING TO GET BLOWN OUT OF THE SKY. in fact vision should have been the one apologizing but his amygdala is synthetic so waaha wawhaa

literally the only conversation steve and bucky have is in the quinjet for five seconds and they had 12mins of spiderman backstory??? smh

honestly this movie is such a mess. zemo’s plot, the whole winter soldier(s). this should have been an avengers movie(it basically is with a cap subplot) because literally NO ONE’s motivations are clear which makes it way too hard to empathize with either side. 

i wonder if you calculated all the minutes of different people’s screentime what it would be

smh i can’t believe tony fans think it’s reasonable to get mad about steve fans acting pissy about civil war when steve was basically demoted to second lead in his own film. obvs there are some unreasonable steve/bucky peeps out there but the amount of whining tony fans do is kind of ridiculous when tony has literally such an intricately written emotional arc and steve and bucky both have diddly, as I have said before IN THEIR OWN FILM. (bucky is going to be cap one day might i remind y’all)

eww yes dolores. because all steve/bucky stories must be about bucky being a ladies man. not like he had any other defining character traits, that would be like... decent writing.

ah yes the intricate unfolding of zemo’s storyline ughh spare me. 

lol those are the best security cameras ever for roadside 1991

literally zemo just told you “empires that fall from within never rise again” and you think the best decision is to give into his eeeeeevil plan? be mad, don’t be stupid

like tonys known for being a hothead but all this manpain is so gratuitous.

“he killed my mom” tony your weapons have killed hundreds of thousands of innocents and you weren’t brainwashed when you made them. if you hadn’t had multiple chances to repent, where would you be?

“my father made that shield” yeah for steve. it wasn’t a conditional fckin offer

rhodey is literally the best person. Tony Stank

i still can’t believe the fckin straightjacketed and collared wanda it makes me so mad

good thing the end credits are of shadows and rubble cuz THAT’S WHAT THIS MOVIE IS

oh right I TOTALLY FORGOT bucky’s fate is relegated to a end credits scene ebcaues he’s not goddamn important enough it seems

the white outfit tho

“let them try” thank you tchalla for being the only person who listens to reason and actually has defined principles

i really don’t hate tony he literally dominates every film he’s in so this shoudl have been an avengers or iron man film to write such an intense storyline for him. 

they literally don’t let cap emote at all. like if you look at clips of the film its just blue steel all the way--he never gets a chance to break down and be upset. not like tony does.

tony fans need to imagine if steve came into an im4 film and just became the sole focus of the film, how they would feel that their fave character’s film was usurped. 

anyways---in conclusion i still hate this movie. unlike the first two cap movies I can’t separate my critical aspect from it enough to love or even like the film. alas. 

[survivor-kuwait]

Episode 4 - “I'm tryna figure out this vote like magnifying glass emoji." - Matt S

So naturally I’m panicking because I’m so sure I’m going to warzone, and the last thing I wanna do is be the swap vote out. I’m enjoying the Ma’an Tribe and just being able to talk to people, especially Kait and Owen. So far I only have individual conversations but maybe tribal will actually allow me to make alliances. I hate saying that cause I would never ask to go to tribal unless I really had to.

Challenge update. I think i have decent scores. Will they keep me from the bottom 5? Who knows but im trying my best. Im trying hard in the first game because i think thats the lowest score. Also FUCK multitask. That is very hard. I just want to be safe this round and figure shit out with Nehe, Stephen, and Trace. I have a little rant about Nehe coming up soon. 🤭 Oo I wanted to scream to Renee not to say anything till the votes were read. I knew she was gunna say something when it was a 3-3 tie and she unmuted. It was a big MOOD tho. I just hope she is able to stay safe. I do trust her a lot.

So we recently switched and I still don't know who is on my tribe lol. I am still with Kait which is great! I am with Owen, Stevie and Madison who I spoke to briefly, Matt who I just met, Chloe who I have always wanted to meet, and some new faces such as Timmy, Renee, and Jacob. I always love a tribe with a bit of everything.

Hello diary room how are you? I am making money moves. Connecting to my “tribe” members. Even Trace. The only bitch i don’t care to be friends w is Maynor bc he stinks of Renee’s brainwash. As we all know, Renee hates me and wants me out etc etc. I am doing what I can to protect myself if I end up going to tribal. All i can hope for is that, if renee is at tribal, maynor isn’t as I would have 4 who would have my back from my tribe. That’s 5 votes. If I can get Matt or Madison or someone else on the other tribe to come with, it’s Au Revoir René. I don’t think I’ll be immune as I only had about 3 hours to work on these 5 flashgames but who knows. I trust Adrian. I hate to say that but I do! I quite like Ian and want to trust him but it’ll take time. I believe Devon has my best interest at heart. Okay that’s all for today x

- - -

Just played Axon and I hate this game soooooo much. I play Minecraft all day and spam click all the time but this game is gonna give me carpal tunnel I sware. My arm hurts so much. I guess it’s time to go to multitask

I have been trying to beat my scores in these flash games and i cant. I dont think they are good enough to keep me from the bottom 5. I’m really nervous to be in warzone with people i havent worked with before. Jshdiw i hope i couls find that idol tonight. Ill feel better if I have it in my hands. Nehe rant. So like he said he was down to work with me and have my back. And once again for some reason has happened again. He lied to me about voting for doodle (also willing to do Stevie) because he voted for Renee, my partner! His reasoning was cuz he told me that he was told thats were the majority was so even tho he told me he trust mr, he didnt believe me when insaid that it was going to be doodle when it switched. He still wantsbto work with me so thats good and i have leverage i culd use because he told me he wanted trace gone so i could throw him under the bus if i feel like i cant trust him. Idk if i should be upset about this cuz ppl liebin survivor but in this twist trust is way more important now than in a regular season.

Immunity or tribal it doesn't matter the game presses on. The benefit of immunity is to just build relationships with people without the risk of going home or burning my idol(side note fuck all you bitches when you inevitably turn against me an make me burn my favorite piece of jewelry). Corey has really grown on me, talk game of thrones with me and I'm alliance putty in your hands! I was happy to see Maynor again, I feel there is something there that can be fostered,  Cullan is a bit of an ignima to me still. I'll crack him though one way or another. Trace and I have begun chatting so I'm still up in the air on him and really most my tribe and people in this game. I honestly expected to be on the low end of scores for this challenge but I wasn't? Idk, double elimination means retrograde and please, please don't let it be Chloe vs Willow, I want them both to stick around and be valuable allies. If they can't keep the votes off them then as Walder Frey once said, " I'll find another."

This warzone where 2 people are leaving is just not cute. I was not happy when I saw that. I knew I was going to be here because I did each of the flash games like once or twice and called it a day so I knew I was going to be here and I accepted that. When I saw who else was there I thought "okay, I think I can probably find people to vote with and stay safe this time around" and then BAM it's a double elimination with the vote and it totally changes the strategy of the vote. Could be more difficult to navigate. All I know is that I need to step up my social game because I haven't chatted much with people and I need to start building relationships so if I end up here again I have people that have my back. I am just struggling with the idea of working with Nehe. Longevity I don't think I want to do. Short term, sure. But I don't think I want to deal with that for the whole game. Been there, done that and I am over it. I was talking to Adrian last night and my god that was an infuriating conversation. Adrian had no idea how the warzone was operating because he hadn't been there and I just wanted to say "sis, read an effing post you lazy ass and it will make sense" It's not that hard to understand, it is just different from normal. I just hate when people don't know things because they don't want to read a post. Going back to this double elimination tribal; it is really hard to choose two targets. Being on tribes that don't seem to matter because we get scored individually makes it almost a moot point to target people for poor challenge strength because it is a pretty individual game. I guess that would be incentive to get out strong challenge performers but all of those people won so again, not a good strategy. Also everyone has just encountered different people and no one is being put together with the same people as someone else so there are a bunch of different dynamics between players, more varied than normal because we aren't forced to interact with the same people for an extended period of time. These votes have just been a lot more nerve wracking than votes normally are and making it out alive feels like more of a feat than normal. I'd say I like the extra challenge to step up the strategy because it's different, but I honestly don't. I don't need this extra anxiety about votes, no thank you. I just hope I survive this!

New tribes yay... I miss maynor and it’s overwhelming to actually be forced to talk to more than one person lmao. But other than that it’s good and I’m safe and immune and so far everyone here seems cool... even if I can’t trust anyone because of those 3 votes I got last tribal!!!! Doodle and Stephen and maybe nehe better watch OUT

Now that the game has finally sped up a little bit, I'm excited because I feel like I can actually play the game more. I am also ECSTATIC that I am not at this double tribal thing, because that sounds stressful and I know that avoiding it completely was the best case scenario for my game right now. I really really like Corey. Him and I have hit it off and I can see us working together really well deep into the game. I'm glad that he is safe this round too because he is probably the person I am closest to on this tribe of people I am kind of afraid of. Ian came to me and started talking as well, but something just doesn't sit well with me about him. He blew everyone out of the water in the challenge, so that will have to be something I need to think about down the line when I decide who I want to vote out. Nehemiah talked to me a lot before he went into the war zone, trying to apologize to me about voting Renee. He made it seem like I was withholding information from him which could not be further from the truth. Classic erratic Nehe again making shit up and trying to pin it on me. I want his ass out and I want it out soon. I feel like I finally have some footing in this game. Timmy and I are tight, Corey and I are tight, and I made good relationships with Renee, Madison, and Owen in the last war zone. Hopefully if I do end up going to the war zone again I'll be able to have at least a few people to work with, because right now I don't feel very comfortable on my tribe if this game were normal and we voted each other out.

I am feeling FUCKEN PAN-tastic!! I was working last night so just read the post quickly and it said I was in the Warzone. I felt really sad and nervous but there was an error and I was actually immune. I was so happy that work didnt suck. It was a double too so Im super duper happy that I didnt end up going to tribal. I need to talk more to Ian because Me and him are talking most than others. Im also talking to Trace since he is Timmy’s partner and I want to work with him. Ive been talking to Corey for a bit. I need to make stronger connections while im safe so I can rely on them to want to work with me in the future warzones.

I am so happy to be safe this round! I'm kind of just glossing over the tribe swap because it's barely like we're on tribes since we're competing against them. Just hoping it's 2 from the other tribe gone so that way we still have 5 people to be safe. But also it'll probably be 1 and 1. Either way someone is coming back because retrograde is activated every round 2 people leave so that's going to be interesting. Them and Nehe can start a club...unless it's Nehe again lol. Honestly let it be Nehe again because it means he won't win in the end. Like who would vote for the person who was voted out twice, once has happened, but twice, idk if people would respect that. It would be he hasn't been playing a good game since it was easy to take him out. I'm just excited that I don't have to attend tribal and I can talk to people without the stress of making plans. Matt and I have been talking and he's pretty cool. He is definitely someone I can see myself working with since he's easy to talk to so far.

Well this twist is proving chaotic as it was intended. It appears we have a split but who the hell onows with this round. I do feel a little vulnerable with short repossess from some. I mean anyone could go home tonight.

i will write something longer when I'm home but I'm shook???? that I won the flash game thing. Matt is my fave and I hope my boring Scorpio person goes home thx

Do I trust that these people are gonna give me the correct information when its only 15 minutes before tribal? Not for a fucking MOMENT! But I haven't heard my name and people are like swimming between 2 names and I love both of them equally. Like this is sooooo hard. No me gusta.

I got meself an alliance AND I somehow still haven’t gone to tribal... why am I more stressed now than I was before??? I think the fact that the game is becoming super real is what’s making me really nervous, and as much as having a solid 3 with Owen and Kait makes me extremely happy, considering I trust them more than I’ve trusted an alliance in most games, there’s still so much game left to be played, and I remember in Solomon getting swapped away from my allies and it screwing me over.... I’m shaky!

Oop. Tribal is going to be soon. I wonder who the two that will be going. I just hope it isnt someone Ive been talking to. 2 people will be leaving so i think its going to trigger retrograde and one will be back.This warzone is really messing up strategy in this game.

I missed two round confessionals which suck but to quickly basically sum what y’all missed. I formed the voters pact that plan was throw challenges to get to the warzone but that in it self failed cause they didn’t all throw and then doodle was voted off the next round. I also kinda got lied to about the vote so like boo. This round  in the warzone I kinda like this batch and it’s now how do we navigate the double vote out thing. I have a personal vendetta with Adrian cause I don’t trust him and Chloe is basically a non factor . So the plan since last night was always to go for those two it was just how do we go about it. I decided to make a group of 5 because it made it easier for them to willingly “choose” who they wanted to vote. And thankfully we lead them into voting chloe and Adrian. Now it’s just navigating who votes who and if the plan stays the plan. Fucking Devon is chaotic switching shit. He tried to switch the vote to willow to succumb to Thomas but who gives a fuck what Thomas is voting. I just care about the finale vote tally. I’m afraid definitely if it’s gonna be me for the fact that I don’t want to go back to the retrogade but it can easily be me. Like personally I feel like I’m always able to get people to groove in the direction I want but then I let them mingle and shit happens. I always make sure to have a hand in with everyone sonthey don’t want to turn on me but really the people I truly trust is stevie, Devon and maybe Stephen. Stephen is weirding me out shady vibes but we’ll see.

Immunity never tasted so good! I need Adrian to be safe. I need Madison and Jacob to be safe bc I think they’re at tribal? I would like Renee and Maynor gone but they’re both safe boo hoo. I am socializing w everyone. I love Trace, Adrian, Ian. I would like Cullan gone sooner rather than later as he is hard to socialize with but I like his partner, Willow. That being said, I think everyone likes Willow. Her leaving wouldn’t be the worst thing tonight but I do stan.

I have no sins I’m literally just sitting !!!! Kisses!!!!! Made an alliance with Matt and Kait. But you know how this is gonna turn out....? Kait and Matt are gonna get closer and at some point she will pick HIM over ME!!!! Heksjd this CYS flashback. But for now I like them. Glad that Timmy and madison are on my tribe even tho Timmy considered voting stevie.... speaking of Stevie zzzz boy rlly almost didn’t save himself Lol. But yeah I’m happy the game has shaken up and I’m excited to see what happens at this tribal. I need to really step my social game up tho so I have numbers when I’m down in that bottom ten

I’m tryna figure out this vote like magnifying glass emoji

It sucked thay Willow went. Hopefully she is able to come back because I feel like i had a good connection with her. Madison and Stephen survived so that was good. Right now Im hoping that i can be part of the live challenge. So I have hit M4 N4 O4 P4 and Q4. Im hoping R4 is the last one and i get something tonight at 11:30pm. I keep forgetting to do a reminder for idol guess so it keeps going back further n further.

so happy we voted out two girls, no offense but this warzone twist makes it impossible to backstab nehe and co. effectively. Its fine, hopefully itll be over soon and I can vote his ass out. No offense to the guy but he just very controlling.

Willow, nothing against you, but I really wanted you gone. I hated that you made it to FTC of another ORG without anything besides an idol play and I can say I am not fulfilled. Sadly, Chloe went to and it sucks because I always wanted to play with her but sadly it was short lived, for now. Hopefully Chloe wins her way back into the game!

Of fucking course it's Chloe and Willow in the retrograde. Bastards are voting off the people I know for sure would mess up and leak it to me if I needed to play my idol. I told Corey about how Cullan is short with me and he confirmed he is short to him as well, it must just be how Cullan is. That's fine and all but makes it hard to get a read on him. Corey and I continue to get along from my perspective, more good news, I did not fuck up while I was completely wasted last night and tell someone about my idol. I have a bad track record of getting drunk and laying all my cards on the table to people. I'm not only playing against everyone in the game but also drunk Ian, and that guy is a prick.

I did my next hit and it sunk the ship!! It’s my first time actually finding something in these idol searches. It may not have been an idol but a vote steal is a good item to have when you just need that one more vote. Im not going to tell anyone I have it. Its going to be a secret until it is used to take a big target/threat in this game.

so far in this game im just working on building my connections! i havent gotten a vote yet which is good but i want to try and not go to tribal as much anymore bc eventually i will become a target. i feel as though my best alliance is with madison obvi since we started together and are good friends. other than that im glad adrian stayed because she is someone i could see myself working with

Fuck this I’m tired and my fingers hurt and ugh

Im waiting to found the retrograde duel and hopefully willow is able to come back because I have some part of connection with her. That is all for today. Oop. Bulbasaur in detective Pikachu was the cutest!!

I got voted out bc I had a busy 2 days and I don't think my score for retrograde is very high goodbye

[winterywitch]

ace discourse survey results:

okay, so unfortunately i can only see 100 of the 176 [as of writing up this post] respondents as a non-paying member of surveymonkey - my apologies for not noticing/unpublishing it sooner, hopefully these results are comprehensive @_@ looking at them, i feel like for the most part they are

so aight here we go, i’m posting the results for each question - the data for the 100 respondents i can see, including the answers i agree with personally

1.) Who are the two opposing sides in ace discourse, if there are sides at all?

my hot take: Ace exclusionists vs ace inclusionists

2.) Is the ace discourse a recycled form of bi discourse?

my hot take: Yes, the bi community was excluded and in many ways still is for many of the same reason aces are now. [in hindsight i wanted to add a slightly more neutral answer for this one though]

3.) How do you feel about the comparison of TERFs to exclusionists?

my hot take:  There are a lot of noteworthy similarities, but it's important to acknowledge the differences in scope, power, ideology, etc. between these two groups instead of insist they are identical.

I think it's a fair comparison, but only in the hands of trans women. If you're not a trans woman, you have no place to be making this comparison.

4.) Do you check someone's about or links before calling them a cishet?

my hot take:  Yes, someone who is not cishet should not be called a cishet, ever. It's invalidating and it's just wrong.

Yes, people are constantly mislabeled and misgendered in the discourse on ALL sides and I don't want to contribute to that.

Calling people cishets isn't a thing I feel moved to do, usually. I don't think it matters, if you're making a shitty argument then you're making a shitty argument.

[the last other response is kind of funny to me FSR like welp at least youre honest!]

5.) Where do you think aroaces lie on the scale of oppressed vs not oppressed?

my hot take: Aroaces are oppressed, but their oppression functions differently than the oppression of gay men and women, multiple-gender-attracted people and trans people.

Aroaces are not oppressed, but they're not exactly favored and praised by society either. They're sort of neither privileged nor oppressed. [at least not oppressed in the exact same sense otherwise LGBT ppl are]

Unsure

6.) Let's say someone you know is a butch woman who is attracted exclusively to other women, but she has no real interest in sex and doesn't experience sexual attraction to other people, though she's got no problem having sex if it means pleasing her partners. What would you call someone like this?

my hot take:  Of course, she is whatever she identifies as, but my impression of her before being told what her preferred labels are is:... (pick another answer from the identity labels above)

An ace lesbian

(and/or) A stone butch lesbian

[note about the 2nd response: yes, absolutely, but the point of this question is how people identify these traits - this person could identify as literally any and all of the terms listed here if she chose to, you would not be forcing any of these labels on her.  maybe a better way to word this question would have been “lets say YOU are [etc etc], bc the point isnt how well you force labels on strangers. i am against forcing labels on people.]

[note about the 3rd response: the woman in question is a lesbian, shes a woman attracted exclusively to other women. but i had no idea that bi/pan women had their own terms like that, thank you!]

[note about the 4th response: errrr, this is about two adults having consensual sex, the hypothetical lesbian is not being taken advantage of, and she would not be at fault if she WAS. people are not in the wrong for consenting to sex, if they happen to be asexual. what is wrong is taking advantage of people. sorry i dont mean to argue with any of the responses but this one, as a survivor of coercive sexual abuse, and someone who used to wholly consent to sex when i IDed as ace rubbed me ALL kinds of wrong ways.]

7.) Let's say someone you know is a cis man exclusively attracted to women sexually, but has no real interest in romance and doesn't experience romantic attraction to other people. What do you call someone like this?

my hot take: He can call himself whatever he wants, but it would bother me if he referred to himself as anything but...: (pick another answer from the identity labels above)

A cishet aro man

8.) A man calls himself bisexual because he is attracted to women and nonbinary people. How do you feel about this?

my hot take: I'm happy! He's respecting NB peoples' genders, which is something that's unfortunately rare. Good on him for not lumping in NB people with binary women. BUT: I hope he understands he doesn't experience the homophobic aspect of biphobia, he does not experience oppression on the axis of being same-gender attracted.

[note about the other responses: there are a lot of concerns expressed about fetishization wrt saying you are “attracted to” nonbinary people - what i meant to imply with that is that he does not exclude them from his dating pool, and that he does not lump them in with binary women. he is not a nonbinary chaser, and he is not identifying people as NB just by looking at them, he is taking them into account as they come into his life. so the comments about fetishizing dont really apply in this situation - that’s on me, sorry for not wording the question better!]

9.) How do you personally identify in terms of gender and sexuality? (Don't be afraid to use the "other" option if you don't see yourself represented here)

my hot take/identity: Bi

Nonbinary

Woman

Don’t call me SGA

10.) Do you feel there have been any real, tangible benefits from the discourse? If yes, choose the answer that best fits how you feel, or type something in the "other" box. If no, choose the answer that best fits how you feel.

my hot take: No, it's all seemed seriously pointless.

No, it's ruined a lot of my friendships and mutual follows I liked a lot.

No, it's made my time spent on Tumblr extremely tense, uncomfortable and anxiety-inducing. I wish it would just end already.

No, it's caused a rift in the LGBT community on Tumblr that I fear will never be repaired. I preferred when we were all unified, and we weren't arguing over who is and is not LGBT "enough." [note: we were never unified, but there was definitely a period on tumblr when FAR FEWER people were arguing about LGBT identities with each other within the community]

No, and I wish it never started at all. However, I've found like-minded peers who make it a bit more bearable.

No, it triggers a lot of bad feelings in me and leads me to argue much more than I normally would. It's almost impulsive, I can hardly stop, but I hate it and it hurts.

Yes, it's shown me that Tumblr is a hellhole beyond hope, and it's given me the strength to move partly/completely to Twitter/Discord/Mastodon/Etc.

Yes, I've learned who and what to avoid for the sake of my own mental health.

I'm a little conflicted on this one. Yes and no, I think. [Ideally pick another answer or two from the above that you agree with to explain exactly how "yes and no"]

so hm thats that i guess!! feel free to reblog this with your Hot Takes and whatnot but i am REALLY gonna request that no like, actual arguing/discourse/aggressive shittiness takes place on this post, this is a zone for people being nuanced and decent with each other and their Discourse.avi, not for your sick owns about the pure aceys or the oppressive allos or whatever

[bwicblog]

SA: does anyone know scary stories.

TT: your fa(\/)e TT: #goTTem

SA: my face is not a plural.

VV: ♚ ~ Not to mention it's a rather nice face.

SA: thank you ❤

VV: ♚ ~ But I also think scary would depend on the troll, yes? My scary is likely very different from crabbies.

SA: What makes a story scary to you, Perdia?

DD: i dont really know any myself but id love to hear one!

DD: i think so anyways

DD: i dont actually watch horror movies or anything like that very much they always seem so disturbing

DD: but theyre popular around campfires arent they so there must be something to them!!

DD: granted i dont know much about campfires either but thats mostly a circumstance of living underwater until recently

VV: ♚ ~A scary story to me is someone bringing a Birkin to dinner but not bringing a coach bag to put it in just incase it rains...!!

VV: ♚ ~ Or not being prima ballerina anymore.

VV: ♚ ~ truly horrifying.

DD: i think that falls more into the tragedy genre really when you think about it!

DD: horror is when you find out it doesnt matter because it was a knockoff all along! 😛 😛 😛

VV: ♚ ~Be still my tender heart....you're rather correct.

SA: not bringing a coach bag to put it in... in case it rains.

SA: that is very complicated.

SA: I find it easier to have a single wallet.

SA: I enjoy ghost stories. Primarily because I do not believe or feel ghosts.

SA: although i have met mediums.

VV: ♚ ~ Yes! You put the coach in your Birkin, then if it rains you put the Birkin in the Coach. VV: ♚ ~ I have many more things than just a wallet I need a bag to carry it all, may as well be fashionable while I'm at it.

VV: ♚ ~ Did you tell the medium you don't believe?

DD: and really i think the point less about having things to put in your bag and more having the bag in the first place DD: its an accessory!

DD: but oh my goodness i think i believe in ghosts altogether too much

DD: though i guess at the moment im running a little bit more into revenants!! DD: the desert is full of them 😦

SA: oh, no. that would be rude.

SA: I don't understand why you need another bag to put the bag in.

SA: But alright.

SA: yes, there are many out there. so i've heard.

DD: well one of the bags is very valuable fashionable and easy to damage if it ends up in rainy conditions so if you want to be fashionable and be able to bring it places you should have a second less valuable and easily ruinable bag to protect the first one should you need it!

SA: ...Or you could simply have a decent waterproof bag to start that looks well with what you wear.

VV: ♚ ~ Ooooooh this one gets me. I enjoy this seadweller much more than yesternights~ What's your name? I never introduced myself properly, Perdia Averic.

VV: ♚ ~ Honeycomb please, I won't judge your wallet don't judge my superior, luxe bag.

DD: well yes but bags like that typically arent quite as nice! DD: though i spend most of my time underwater so that is what i end up using most of the time anyways admittedly

DD: and oh my goodness well thank you very much that is lovely to hear DD: i was afraid i had come off unfavorably earlier so i am glad that i have not yet succeeded in alienating everyone! DD: my close friend often says i sort of have a way of not being great with people so

DD: although i do agree that vv overall does have a point that while functionality is all well and good if you are into that sort of thing and surrounded by people that are into that sort of thing it really is important to have the appropriate fashionable items at certain times

DD: though i would also argue that does have a function as well just a social one!

SA: well the bag is very pretty with you, little princess. I just could never justify carrying one myself 😃

DD: oh dear i am talking a lot again

DD: my apologies!!

VV: ♚ ~ It's an ultra functional bag~ VV: ♚ ~ Thank you Prisma ✨ I'll carry your wallet for you then. I simply do have looks to upkeep even with my hue. When one works hard to keep a stance certain....choices come with it. VV: ♚ ~ Like a bag in a bag .

VV: ♚ ~ Don't apologize though DD~ You speak a lot but it's not exactly grating. Needs editing, some conciseness of course but ah~ You have a head about you which is more than can be said for some! Pity really. For them of course. They have my pity.

DD: oh but maybe i wouldnt mind some pity insert jokingly coy giggling here DD: you dont happen to be a particularly attractive rainbowdrinker bedecked in frills do you? DD: because i have recently discovered i am quite partial to those! DD: more seriously though thank you that is very lovely to hear especially from a princess of such good taste!

DD: but you are right in that i could do to be more concise my good friend often says similarly though admittedly it is more due to the linebreaks in my codewriting

DD: it is a work in progress!!!

VV: ♚ ~ Oh how transparent you seem to be! I am bedecked in frills often enough but unfortunatley, or rather fortunatley as I am fond of my rougey hue, I am not a jade let alone a deceased one. VV: ♚ ~ Plus my pusher is already claimed hohoho <3 VV: ♚ ~ There's always bound to be one that wanders into this forsaken chat one night though! Sweep them up before another troll does.

VV: ♚ ~ Or go for more...violent measures but I really don't and would never recommend someone get their owns hands dirty.

VV: ♚ ~ Ah! Speaking of maintanence. I must rest. Not that I require much upkeep but a good rest is important! Do rest well new friend, and Honeycomb prince as well~ Good light .

DD: i guess i am pretty transparent but its not as though i have anything to hide really DD: aide from company secrets of course but that's something im good at keeping mum about! DD: and oh dear i dont suppose i really know what you mean when it comes to more violent measures but that sounds like the sort of alarming thing maybe more suited towards the scary stories people brought up earlier!!

DD: and thank you very much i do hope you have a good rest as well!! DD: it is actually nearly moonlight over here as well and i should be turning in soon i just DD: got caught up working on a project of mine and lost track of time! DD: i was just taking a break when i turned on this chat but really i will go to bed DD: i only have to finish... DD: a few more minor things!!! DD: and maybe....

DD: hm!

SA: I apologize, I had to get ready for rest myself.

SA: finish them then?

SA: ..."would never advise someone to get their own hands dirty"

SA: 🤔 goodnight

DD: i am going to finish them!! DD: i just thought of another idea i could implement alongside the module that i am currently editing and oh dear

DD: i cant just stop now! DD: i am on a roll

DD: also i do believe our dear vv is advocating for the use of an auspistice! DD: or an assassin!! DD: i am not quite sure which!

DD: though i am a little bit inclined to select the mediator option on account of i have had some rather hands on dealings with assassins lately and it has all left a sour taste in my mouth!

DD: and not even the good kind of sour like you get with pickled herring

DD: oh dear i believe i am craving fish again DD: there is NO FISH here in the desert!!

ID: alright status report, how is everyone doing post-faire?

SA: Working.

SA has sent IMG_045.png. It is a selfie of him, angled high enough to show a blue or dark indigo troll pinned on the ground. They appear to be unconscious

ID: pftttt. nice selfie background there. better be careful. =:P

SA: this is the last one for the night 😄

SA: I am excited to go hive and sleep.

SA: How are you? How was the party at Siparas?

ID: i'm sure you are.

ID: i'm good. tired, but i didn't expect to sleep well so it's whatever. watched way more fantasy trolls crying about having to dump a magic ring than i ever wanted to.

SA: Oh, it was the lord of the rings?

SA: what would you do if your friend wouldn't let go of the ring, Hadean.

ID: uh i probably would have ganked the ring like. a perigee ago lbh.

SA: it isn't even that useful... Doesn't it just turn the wearer invisible?

ID: i don't know, the evil dude seemed to make it seem like it could do more. maybe it can amplify psi or something. i think the main whiny guy was a flatscan.

SA: maybe. How else would you become a flaming eye.

SA: truly living the life.

ID: idk it was fun. lots of eyecandy at least.

SA: the elves are always nice ❤

SA: I appreciate the costuming more than anything. much better than the chainmail bikinis at the faire.

ID: i liked aragon. he seemed like a cool guy.

SA: And he even got all of his quadrants in the end with his kingdom surviving.

ID: and he got to lead like. all the cool fights.

SA: I'm growing my hair out.

SA: this is what I've gained from this conversation.

SA: I want you to know this.

SA: Hang on, my client is being difficult.

ID: pff if you're gonna, go for it! you got one of those damn mugs that gets to look good no matter what, so.

AA: omggg. but will it blow majestically in the wind? >:}

ID: he already can see stuff.

ID: pris, what do your cuspy eyes see?

SA: Me beating the shit out of this fuchsia if they don't double my pay.

ID: pffff live the dream pris. and get good with a bow.

SA: I am good with a long distance rifle, does that count

SA: No, it will not blow majestically in the wind.

SA: problem resolved. cusp is now theirs.

SA: I can go hive now.

ID: i mean a rifle is just an advanced bow right. so sure.

AA: booooo, no point in long hairn w/o it blowing.

ID: uh the point is to put it in a cool braid. obvs.

AA: brnaid? singularn?? n.

AA: go big orn go home, hads, gotta have, like, at L E A S T a dozen beforne they'rne cool. >:}

SA: Hadean's hair is. too long.

ID: bite me. =:I i like my braid.

AA: you like plenty of lame shit, brnah, embrnace it. accept yrn weak sauce brnaid tastes. >:P

AA: and too long???

SA: emerel stepped on it during the fight, that's too long.

ID: i got him off of it, didn't i?

ID: i mean him stepping on it was just being spiteful.

ID: and i really should've put a spike through his foot for it.

AA: y, that. on both. AA: you can't do yrn app by what ppl might grnab, othernwise, you'll just, like. AA: look borning as fuck. >:P

ID: i mean if it wasn't my braid, he'd have been stomping on my horns.

ID: i have a very grab-able appearance.

SA: I feel as if his foot would have rolled off though due to the shape.

SA: You do.

SA: If I ever need to stop you I can just reach slightly a head but I may also clothesline you

ID: wow pris, don't clothesline me. or grab at me, hella rude. why would you need to stop me! =:P

SA: Maybe I saw something cute in a window and wanted to show you while shopping.

SA: I have clotheslined people as they've ran away, however. It is. hilarious.

SA: because I knoww here they will be so I stategically do nothing.

ID: ....it's called telling me to stop pris, c'mon.

SA: I know that

SA: Please, like I would actually do it...

ID: i like not being clotheslined. =:P

SA: I would never clothesline you.

SA: does that help

ID: yes.

SA: In general i would never intentionally cause you harm.

SA: sleep well at night.

AA: lmao. awww.

AA: but will you watch him while he sleeps to guarantee he sleeps well?? bc, like, if we'rne clarnifying things, that totes is apparnently a thing that should be clarnified, too.

ID: no we cleared that watching people sleep is fucking creepy.

SA: I am not going to watch him sleep...

ID: though apparently pheres disagrees.

AA: okay, okay, good. >:}

SA: I admit I am unsettling but i am at least vaguely aware of proximics and personal boundaries.

ID: i sleep like shit without worrying about someone watching me sleep. =:I

AA: we do not talk abt phern's shitty rnom tastes, 'kay, we just close ourn bulbs and trny to ignorne them.

AA: and gj, prni. AA: the vaguely is totes still ominous tho. >:} jsyk.

SA: it is what i do best.

SA: It's how i keep my clients in line and from not abducting me 😉

SA: nom tastes?

ID: romantic tastes.

SA: ah.

AA: .... AA: ........ AA: WTF arne yrn clients trnying to abduct you forn.

SA: nothing, it was a joke.

ID: oh.

SA: however I would be a convenient thing to trap and use of free.

ID: i figured they'd try and abduct you to use your psi without having to, y'know. pay you. seems about right.

SA: yes

SA: I've only been threatened a few times.

SA: The Provenance underground is much more managable, though.

AA: >:{

AA: did you cull em?

ID: trolls can be fucking weird.

SA: They have been dealt with in a way that doesn't cause me long-standing harm, let me put it like this.

SA: murder isn't a sollution always, their court will come after you.

ID: you ever meet some of those highbloods that read helmsman romance.

ID: they'll make you want to scrub your skin raw after talking to them for like. a second.

AA: hmph. did you at least make a good example of them?? bc, like, if yrn getting pushed arnound, then not fucking making a points only gonna get theirn peeps brnave.

SA: I don't get pushed around.

AA: ugh, y. lived with one. they'rne the fucking wornst.

AA: good!!

SA: don't worry, I am fairly good at this.

SA: as naive as I often seem.

SA: crime and work and military are things i excel at.

ID: the fucking worst is right.

SA: What happens in helmsman romances?

ID: and go pris. =:)

SA: I understand the concept but... how.

AA: y, y, obvs you arne a strnong independent - hahahaha.

AA: hads can dd you, bc I ain't in the mood to scrnub my hands clean aftern. >:P

ID: oh. you know. usually they start out in a clade or a quad. and then end up getting drafted to the helm. and the highblood happens to be on the same ship.

SA: ...what is a clade.

SA: I have been holding off asking for fear of embarassment

ID: ah... like... the trolls that are quadded to your quad?

SA: ah.

AA: y! enclades arne the ppl you ain't piling, but, like, you still can't cull, bc it'd be fucked up. and if someone culls them, you gotta rnetaliate, orn Y RN fucked up.

ID: yeah. sips knows. i'm like the worst troll to talk about clades.

SA: ...that is immensely complicated.

ID: yeah social shit usually is.

AA: also, ngl, the ones I knew abt werne all, like, crneepy bluebloods falling forn theirn ship, bc the insurnmountable bond bw trnoll and ship, ect ect, and, like, despernate lost in space piles, and pirnate rnaids makin' the helms all like 'I'm the only one allowed to cull them!!', and AA: ughhh, I'm grnossing myself out.

ID: i know mostly about the younger helms novels.

AA: >:? AA: it isn'ttttt. it's totes ez, dudes.

SA: that's. horrific.

SA: that would be like writing a romance story between my program psions and their handlers.

SA: but much worse, because were are children

SA: disgusting.

ID: yeah, well. it happens.

ID: and some trolls really buy in to the idea.

ID: me and pris have never been a part of a clade so. it seems complicated to us.

SA: it sounds like it would cause a long chain cycle of revenge.

ID: i mean being part of a clade is supposed to help. prevent trolls from wanting to cull your ass i think?

ID: for fear of being counter-culled by the clade.

SA: But I feel like it would make it hard to operate as well.

SA: fear of causing tension or rejection.

SA: attrox's matesprit was a virulent, hateful thing who was also quadded to my roommate.

SA: and there was a lot of tension between him and anyof attrox's other quadrants or friends.

SA: htey broke up perhaps because of my intervention.

SA: I don't feel particularly bad.

ID: that's when you get an ashen or whatever. or break up, that works.

SA: how do you auspistice something when they don't acknowledge there is a problem?

SA: despite one of them crying contantly about how much they hurt.

SA: I do not know.

SA: I would be happy with a red or a romantic pale, if I had to have a quadrant. And just one.

AA: i mean, y, can totally starnt a wicked rnevenge cycle. but it's like hads said. AA: and lmao, you can't be a clade if ppl arne unhealthy shitfurnoodles, dude. all you can do is wipe yrn hands of that shit.

AA: .. why not pitch?? >:

AA: >:?

ID: my bachelor lifestyle has worked out alright for me.

SA: there's reasons but i'd rather not explain.

AA: you don't gotta quad if you don't wanna. but, like, idk, don't let crnazy fuckerns turn you off?? ppl arne always batshit. AA: and quads arne fun. >:} like, idk, i ain't evern without a pitch, bc.. it'd be fucking borning.

SA: i don't see excitement in that, though.

AA: flushrnoms lame tho, txt it.

SA: i have enough excitement in my life. I would be happy knowing I feel safe with someone.

ID: i mean pitch is supposed to be safe rivalry.

SA: Well yes but that's not what i meant.

AA: yrn supposed to feel safe w yrn kismesis, losern. if they'rne dangernous, it ain't pitch, it's, like. fucked up pale w pails.

SA: what

ID: idk i have a shitty personality for quads, so i just leave them be.

ID: yeahhh some people pail their pales. weird quadrant smearing stuff.

AA: y, it's grnoss. and stfu, yrn fine. have you evern even trnied having a quad??

SA: Pailing is.

SA: unsanitary.

SA: kissing is fine though. i think kissing would be nice in theory.

SA: but nothing is better than my cold bed.

ID: ...

AA: lmaooo.

AA: well, shit, then get a fish.

AA: >:P

SA: i left the airconditioning on so everything is cold and it's very nice.

SA: ...I don't... want a fish.

ID: i like lukewarm best.

ID: i got too hot and too cold easy.

SA: sharing a bed with you must be hell on alternia.

ID: only if you don't want me to bake you. =:P

SA: see.

AA: rneal talk!! have neithern of you, like, evern had quads??

AA: evern?? >:

AA: >:?

ID: i mean... nah.

SA: No.

SA: quads were discouraged for program psions.

SA: I actually believe we are all sterile so it wouldn't matter.

SA: But I am unsure of the specifics.

AA: holy shit. at both of you - AA: uH.

SA: ...

SA: was that too much information.

AA: y. am kinda curnious how the f you know that, but, like, sparne me the deets.

SA: i think you misunderstand but i will spare you.

ID: it's okay pris, we can be quadless coolguys.

SA: excellent. we can be Kool together.

SA: just what i wanted.

AA: wow, rnude, making a club wo me. when I'm like, rnight herne. AA: I am qqing irnl, jsyk.

ID: what, you got no quads?

AA: n, i've had way2many to join yrn quadfrnee club. >:P

SA: then continue qqing

ID: exactly, so no blubbering. =:P

SA: :p

AA: so go get quads and join the lam -- LMAO M E A N.

AA: fucking rnude frnom both of you. >:}

SA: only the best of rudeness for you, sipara.

SA: ❤

ID: deal with it. =:P

AA: no wondern you don't have any w those shining pernsonalities. AA: ... omg, okay, but prni is forngiven, bc that's qt A N D weirnd.

AA: hads can still fuck off tho. >:P

ID: =:PPPP

SA: Oh--- haha

ID: i've just managed fiiine without quads.

AA: lmao, if you say so.

SA: same.

AA: lbrn tho, idk how anyone manages without a moirnail.

ID: like i do. duh.

AA: .. inc you, mrn dumpstern firne.

SA: you surround yourself with stable individuals.

SA: like me.

SA: i am impervious to emotional distress.

ID: rude!

ID: i just do whatever i want and it usually works out!

AA: y, see, that's not actually good. >:}

AA: and lmaooo. y, like getting stabbed w a halbernd wornks out, rnight? >:P

ID: i'm still alive aren't i

ID: and i didn't technically lose.

ID: so it mostly worked out.

AA: that's a low fucking barn to have, losern.

ID: and yet i limbo under it like a pro.

AA: loooook. rnails arne forn, like.. making surne you don't rnun into shit like that. orn crnack yrn horns on yrn stupid limbo barn of surnvival. orn prni doesn't get jumped forn being weirnd and emojiless at the wrnong time.

AA: if you don't have any othern quads, you should totally have that.

SA: wouldn't it be a high bar because it would be so easy to pass.

SA: if it were limb.

ID: the only troll i can trust to have my best interests at pumper is myself. i'm just my own moirail, clearly.

ID: sometimes i'm just lazy on the job.

AA: lmao, yrn a p shit one, then. trnade up!!

SA: you and hadean often stop me from revealing all my secrets, which is good enough.

SA: but in day to day life whether or not I properly express myself is often irrelevant and infact volatile high bloods often take it as a threat as i cann't be coerced convetnionally.

ID: hey, i'm doing alright. =:P

ID: i'm too high maintenance for anyone else to stand.

SA: i find you tolerable if extremely unwise.

SA: 😄

AA: wherne is yrn hotel rnoom again, bc I'm gonna punch you. >:}

SA: (this is a joke)

SA: Whose?

AA: and lmao, prni. gd.

AA: hads. Ï can't punch you. that'd be so fucked up. >:}

SA: ... why

SA: I demand equal punching rights.

ID: i'll give you my punch coupon pris.

SA: thank you for this generous gift

LC: [ ... I see everYYone is doing well and fine ]

AA: n, too bad, you ain't getting em. these fists arne a summern exclusive and I've alrneady stamped Hads name on both.

SA: sipara's coachella fists.

AA: y!!

ID: =:'( don't punch me, i'm already half broke already.

LC: [ So what exactlYY did Hadean do that he is going to get punched, and Sipara whYY do YYou want to get punched? ] LC: [ I see no logical reason behind... wanted to get punched is all. ]

ID: oh hi yern.

SA: hello yern.

LC: [ Hello. ]

ID: pris is gonna punch me because she's jelly of my self-moirail abilities.

SA: let me take hadean's punch for him.

SA: i am sipara now.

AA: arne you punching him now??

SA: =>:} worms

AA: LMFAO

LC: [ Is that... healthYY though? ] LC: [ Oh mYY. ]

AA: G T F Ö, you rnuined my quirnk.

ID: it's like looking in a mirror huh sips.

SA: =>:} wornms.

ID: better?

AA: y, ty ty, gj.

SA: oh yes, the rn thing.

ID: i'm healthy as fuck yern.

AA: also like brnb must feed and watern lal. and by that, I mean he's snorning and I'm pourning watern on him til he stops. >:{

SA: oh dear.

ID: get it up his nub, that'll get him.

SA: ...nose?

LC: [ But is self-moirailing healthYY? I am not aware of such research paper existing as of right now. ] LC: [ To a degree, I am positive it works and I hope it's not just YYour last ditch effort of taking care of YYourself. ]

ID: hahah wowww. last ditch effort, that's hella rude.

SA: self moirailing could also be considered minding.

ID: i'm positive i'm a well oiled self-moirailing machine.

SA: which is a required skill for basic social navigation and problem solving.

SA: so I don't have it.

SA: :p

ID: =:P

LC: [ Well, I am not suggesting YYou can't get a moirail even if YYou wanted to. ] LC: [ And well. ]

ID: and cheat on myself? never.

ID: it's impossible to break up with yourself. i'm pretty sure.

SA: you could look at your reflection and tell it you are done with its shit.

AA: ^^^^

ID: i don't take breakups well, i'd start strangling myself. =:'(

AA: brneak the mirnrnorn!!

LC: [ I mean, that works. ]

SA: "i'm finding a REAL moirail now!"

AA: yeah!!

SA: this tells me a lot more about hadean's coping mechanisms than I would like

ID: why are you all so against me as my moirail, hella rude.

SA: note to self: strangulation is a hazard.

ID: i cope just fine!

AA: bc you desernve a prnettiern one, duh, and we only want the best form you. >:}

SA: technically I am my own moirail too only I haven't stated it outloud.

AA: and by best, we mean prnettiest.

SA: so no one can drag me.

SA: ... oh...

ID: i'm pretty as fuck. =>:P

LC: [ Well, maYYbe we care about YYou. ] LC: [ I might not know YYou as well as the others but. I think the others might be able to vouch for mYY words. ]

AA: prni. prniiiiiii.

LC: [ Prisma. ]

AA: I'm gonna drnag you now.

ID: yeah let's focus on pri he needs this more.

SA: do you want to see me make this chat sad in one sentence.

AA: ❤

SA: i'm going to.

SA: my inhibitor is my moirail.

SA: 😃

AA: oh, gtfo m

LC: [ When YYou saYY no one can drag YYou, that's a prettYY open invitation. ]

LC: [ Uhm. ]

ID: i mean. i guess it does stop you from doing anything too dumb.

LC: [ I... guess. ]

AA: hads, n.

AA: that's dumb and yrn dumb.

AA: almost as dumb as that statement. >:{

SA: it stops me from destroying myself which is the same thing, right.

ID: yeah!

SA: you narrowly limbo under death and I narrowly avoid having a catastrophic meltdown.

ID: now if it'll shock you when you blab too much.

SA: you already do that.

SA: oh wait doe this mean I can't use hearts anymore.

SA: <>

ID: whoa there pris, don't make me get jealous over myself.

SA: hahaha

AA: wait wtf you knew what hrnts werne the entirne time??

ID: back off my man.

ID: i'll cut you.

LC: [ YYou guYYs could reallYY use a moirail. ]

SA: ... what do you mean I knew what hearts were the entire time.

SA: of course I knew what i meant everytime I did this

SA: ❤

SA: I can't believe you all thught i was enough of a space cadet to not know.

SA: oh my god.

AA: oh my god, i take back my hrnt at you, weirndo.

ID: i got my moirai yern, duh.

AA: Ö H M Y G Ö D. fuck offffff. >:}

ID: i can't let myself hear all this negative talk about myself. i'll get mad.

AA: yrn exactly that level of space cadet.

ID: and hey pris i figured you knew what they meant.

ID: i mean. it's a heart.

ID: you're naive, not idiotic.

SA: oh so sipara just thought I was a fool.

SA: alright I see how it is.

SA: it's not weird, it's a way of denoting affection.

SA: my hearts are platonic.

SA: unless specified otherwise.

ID: 🖤

SA: oh it's invisible.

ID: use that one. really fuck with trolls.

SA: thank you ❤

LC: [ Ah, uh. I forgot to finish mYY sentence. ] LC: [ Hadean, well I trust YYou that it works so I hope it will keep working. ] LC: [ And uh. Invisible hearts? ]

ID: 🖤 🖤 🖤

ID: are they invisible? i see them.

LC: [ I see. For sYYmbolizing "platonic love" but not in the <> sense? ]

SA: they look sort of invisible on my phone but my backlight is dark.

LC: [ Or did I just miss the point. ]

SA: i think it's more for kismesisitude crossed with matespritship.

ID: they don't have a white heart this is bullshit.

LC: [ ... Wouldn't that be a black heart? ]

AA: i can't see them eithern. >:{

SA: well it is a black hert.

ID: 💙 we can use this one for platonic hearts?

SA: but that requires... finding it in the list.

AA: haaads, stop trn - nnnnn.

AA: and it's blue!!

SA: or you could all assume that if I'm using a heart... it's... platonic.

ID: 💚

SA: and you all can use the multicolored rainbow hearts.

SA: nevermind I like that one.

SA: that's my new heart.

SA: it's my color.

AA: prni, it's way morne fun if yrn, like, madly in love with evernyone, tho.

ID: there you go!

LC: [ Ah. ] LC: [ Noted. ] LC: [ And it is. ] LC: [ Sipara please. ]

ID: i fixed everything. again.

SA: yes, sipara. I will die for you i am so in. love. with you.

AA: yrn like the rnomcom lead we nevern wanted!!

SA: Hadean too

SA: everyone in this chat.

LC: [ Heh. ]

SA: you are all. my matesprit.

AA: amazing. >:} wait no wow back it up.

ID: hey i don't share! rude!

SA has sent :/.png it's a selfie of him makng an even more unamused face than usual

LC: [ Incredible. ]

SA: oh so I can only pick one is that it.

AA: it's gotta be unrneciprocated, that's wherne the com comes in!!

ID: i though the com comes from them both feeling romantic inclinations but not knowing how to act on them correctly.

AA has sent DUH.PNG. It's a selfie of her sticking out her tongue like a mature adult.

AA: why not both, hads??

SA: I thught the commeant comedy.

LC: [ YYou must pick Prisma. ] LC: [ Though while I understand it's currentlYY for amusement's sake. ]

LC: [ ... I hope. ]

SA: Who has to pick prisma.

SA: this is morphing into a dystopian love carat.

SA: everyone wants me and I don't want anyone.

ID has sent ravishingromcominterest.png! It's a selfie of him with his hair down making the most overdramatic puppy eyes.

AA: p surne i watched an anime like that once. >:P

SA: anti-harem.

AA: !!!

SA: Put those eyes away, Hadean.

ID: never.

SA: i don't wnat that face on my phome.

ID: too late.

SA: damn you.

ID: =:PPPPP

SA: 💚

LC: [ Well, I got some romantic interest lYYing elsewhere, so I have alreadYY picked them. SorrYY for letting YYou down Prisma. ]

AA: why keep yrn hairn brnaided?? it's so fucking shiny.

SA: oh, well, yern.

ID: uh because it fucking tangles to fucking hell. duh.

SA: that's fine I didn't want you anywyas.

SA: i am now the spiteful lead.

SA: it's called conditioner.

AA: y, why not brnush it morne and keep it unbrnaided??

LC: [ Well, no offense was taken. ]

AA: Y E A H.

ID: and yeah i got some sweet hair. even though i abuse the fuck out of it.

ID: conditioner costs cash!

ID: and i don't want to be brushing it 24/7 when i'm traveling.

SA: at least put it in a ponytail every so often.

LC: [ WhYY would YYou need to brush it 24/7 while travelling. ] LC: [ Just brush it at the morning, then at the evening. If the weather is windYY, tie it up. ]

SA: wouldn't it be easier to have short hair because you can't take careo f it....?

SA: get a hipster cut like mine.

LC: [ Well I happen to have quite a long hair and I also travel alot. ]

SA: i now advocate you being bald.

LC: [ It's manageable, and also up to what others feel comfortable with. ]

LC: [ Well, no thank YYou. MYY hair is prettYY nice as it is. ]

LC: [ I have a feeling being bald got more disadvantages than advantages to it. ]

SA: not if you wear hats.

SA: I am not tired for once and I don't know how to feel about this.

LC: [ I am not a fan of hats. TheYY are weird. ] LC: [ Wouldn't YYou feel, well, content? Not feeling like falling into a nap for once. ]

ID: i like my braid. =:I

SA: I will make you a daisy chain to loop in it when you come shopping.

ID: my face doesn't look as nice with short hair i don't think.

AA: nnnn, don't cut yrn hairn. long headfluff is bettern, obvs. prni, you should grnow yrns out. >:P

ID: why is your hair short then sips.

SA: i'll grow mine out when I'm ready to commit to a domestic stepford quad.

SA: 😐

LC: [ Well that sounds quite unfortunate. ]

SA: why is your hair short, then, yes

AA: it was down to the floorn, tyvm, and some chucklefuck cut it off.

AA: >:1

LC: [ Long hair can be quite useful. ]

SA: ...what is its use? as a rope?

LC: [ It can warm the back YYour neck during winter. YYou could use it to get cozYY with the help of it. And no. ]

ID: ah man that sucks. =:/

ID: cull them for it?

ID: or chop their hair back? =>:D

SA: scalp them.

SA: two birds one stone.

LC: [ And oh. Did YYou fight them back Sipara? ]

AA: lmfao. that was like, six pernigees ago. it's way longern than it was. and y, y, dnw, i cut off theirn frnonds and fed them to them. >:P

AA: bettern than culling!

SA: that's even worse than i imagined.

ID: i mean i don't go to cold places too much and i'm constantly warm, so. i just like my hair.

SA: I feel sick now.

SA: not really.

ID: hahahah, that'll teach 'em.

AA: it's a jk, nerndlet.

SA: I wish i had someone to get breakfast with.

SA: it did teach them I am sure.

SA: and also brutally traumatized them

ID: damn, i liked the feeding them fronds idea.

ID: what. was it the yellow chucklefuck?

ID: ....fillin?

SA: ....yellow chucklefuck?

LC: [ Well that's a combination of words I didn't expect to see... together. ]

ID: it's some sparkplug that got brainwashed in to being downw ith clowns or something, dnw.

LC: [ Wow. How unfortunate. Like, genuinelYY unfortunate. ]

SA: that's. horrific.

SA: I still can't believe we have...

LC: [ It is. ]

SA: nevermind.

SA: I am a good person.

AA: haha, n, it was a lame-o teal frnom the rning. same place as my face. >:1 AA: and hmm?

AA: haha, it's a little fucked, y.

SA: teals are unusually arrogant.

LC: [ Well, I most definitelYY don't want to know how manYY non-purplebloods got "brainwashed" to be part of the Dark Carnival. ]

ID: teals are the worst. they're in that in-between area that makes them overcompensate.

AA: ^

ID: i mean it's no worse than young psis getting brainwashed by everything else that'll brainwash you. really.

SA: military.

LC: [ MYY experiences with tealbloods been reallYY... mixed. But there are some who are trulYY trYYing to overcompensate. ]

SA: trafficking.

SA: etc

ID: exactly. we're such a hot commodity doncha know.

LC: [ Well, anYYkind of brainwashing is still brainwashing and negativelYY well... affects the troll in question. ]

SA: in some ways it was a positive experience for me.

AA: oh my god.

LC: [ YYou are the rare exception in that case. ]

LC: [ Unless it was pure sarcasm. Then nevermind. ]

ID: i mean. trolls like pris are becoming depressingly more common, y'know?

SA: no, I did learn much more from my program than I would haveb eing left on planet without being put in.

SA: But I would also still have complete feelings.

ID: they're deciding we don't last long enough to get a happy wrigglerhood.

SA: so you tell me.

SA: yes.

SA: My saboteur training began as soon as I was old enough to think and obey.

LC: [ I am aware. ]

AA: idk, it ain't that bad, if you don't have them cutting into yrn pan. AA: i mean, we'rne all gonna end up in the militarny anyway. >:/

SA: 😃 will we

ID: i mean. that's a big if for some of us there sips.

SA: I won't.

ID: you were already in the military pris, that counts.

SA: damn you.

LC: [ Well, I wish lowerbloods got more leewaYY just as higherbloods. And I don't have manYY intentions to be part of the militarYY. ]

SA: no but if you are sorted there then you will be but if not you will be fine.

SA: if I were recaptured and retested I would still tesr for the military based on psionics but also because my protective instincts are outrageously high.

SA: lavender chai sounds good.

LC: [ Well I'd rather not. I am a cartographer and a mapmaker, not a troll who wants to deal with official paperwork and not seeing a planet for the rest of mYY lifespan. ] LC: [ ... And I am aware I am more fortunate that I can counter-argue against it. ]

SA: you could become part of recon

ID: i mean yer is high enough, he'll get some more choice.

ID: esp if he's actually good at what he wants to do.

ID: ...you're a he, right.

LC: [ Well, I positivelYY am. And YYes. ]

ID: see? nothing for him to worry about.

LC: [ If I happened to end up as a ship captain or anYYthing (Not sure if I'd qualifYY), I'd probablYY do mYY best to provide mYY crew an actuallYY pleasant... work experience. ]

LC: [ Which is a major "If", cause being a ship captain sounds stressful. ]

ID: man, my pumper breaks for you. =:P

LC: [ I see YYour sarcasm and I am not going to counter it with sarcasm. ]

ID: good because i would have had to make it weird if you did.

SA: I don't know if you want praise for this attempt to be a decent person or not

ID: c'mon pris, he's trying! that's better than like. most of the highbloods in here.

LC: [ ... Prisma. ] LC: [ I am aware I am "priviliged" and no waYY will I ever experience what lowerbloods got to go through. ]

LC: [ I am prettYY self-aware, thank YYou verYY much. ]

SA: I never said you weren't.

LC: [ Well, some implications were there. AnYYwaYY. I am not going to go into anYYkind of sob stories. ] LC: [ I am just generallYY trYYing to be a decent troll and not judge one bYY it's caste if theYY happen to be lower on the spectrum. ]

ID: so yern, you watch lord of the rings.

LC: [ I saw it a long while ago with a friend. WhYY? ]

ID: because i just watched it and i now judge everyone based on which eyecandy they like best.

ID: so c'mon. desert island, stuck with one of them. which one.

AA: hads taste is shit, btw.

ID: fuck off aragon was alright for a fish.

ID: though i did like her better before i knew she was a fish.

ID: bitch tricked me in to liking her. D:<=

EA: +Can confirm. Shit tast=.-

ID: you guys could've told me she was a fish!

AA: wrnong, legolas was totes bettern. AA: but ikrn? she was sornt of qt if you didn't know she was hiding fucking gills.

LC: [ Well, I am not a big movie buff and it's been awhile ago since I saw it, so I'd have to rewatch it to make a decision based on it. ]

ID: i was betrayed by all of you and i'll never forgive you.

AA: U N F Ö RN T U N A T E L Y.

ID: http://img14.deviantart.net/142f/i/2013/233/e/4/lady_aragorn_1_by_lauratolton-d6j3xy7.jpg

ID: so much better before she was totally revealed as a fish. =:'(

EA: +W=ll, h=r b=ing garbag= had nothing to do with th= fins, r=ally. If you ask m=. - EA: +It was th= fact that sh= was in a garbag= movi= s=ri=s.-

ID: i mean it could have used like. 200% more bloodshed.

ID: the talking parts got too fancy and boring sometimes. =:/

LC: [ Well, that's what YYou get when the director is a seadweller. ]

SA: Legolas is perfect. And you're making a mistake Hadean

ID: legolas was too flimsy looking for me. =:'(

EA: +L=golas is fangirl bait =:|-

ID: yeah why'd he get all the super cool fight sequences.

AA: legolas is hot af and you can both fight me, soz.

SA: oh so am I too flimsy too 😢

ID: sorry pris, you couldn't even beat me in throwing knives. =:P

ID: get gud.

AA: y, prni. he is the twig judging the rnest of the fornest.

SA: it's okay when you're vetter I'll properly destroy you.

ID: swoon. =:PPPPPP

SA: if that's all it takes why not gimli...

SA: oh-- true, sipara

ID: because gimli wasn't hot!

ID: duh.

EA: +L=golas do=sn't =v=n look lik= h= could kick down a door without br=aking his lifts.- EA: +Giv= m= a strong girl clad in armor with a broadsword any night of th= w==k inst=ad.-

LC: [ So do YYou pick faves based* on their looks, Hadean? ]

ID: a mix of looks and being able to kick ass.

SA: Hadean is a shallow mother fucker of course he does

LC: [ Well, figures. ]

ID: says the guy who rated me a 7/10!

SA: well you are a 7/10 this is a logical facr

EA: +7/10 is g=n=rous-

AA: come watch me flarnp, gausia, you'll totes swoon. >:P

ID: says the one who shaves stars in her hair.

AA: y, clearnly he is 8/10, stfu.

EA: +I would if you practic=d prop=r hyg=ni=, mayb= =:P-

SA: 😳

ID: i can only go up from 8/10.

LC: [ Well. ]

EA: +Do you hav= som=thing against stars? Stars ar= hott=r than you'll =v=r b=! By s=v=ral d=gr==s!-

AA: n, mud is my aesthetic, soz yrn 2lame to apprneciate.

LC: [ Stars are much hotter than anYYone in here, in fact. ]

EA: +^-

ID: i mean body-temperature wise maybe. but i'm pretty unnaturally hot that way too. =:P

LC: [ Well Hadean, a star still beats YYou nonetheless. ]

LC: [ SorrYY to disappoint YYou. ]

SA: Hadean is a 10/10 for being hell to share a bed with

SA: I am feeling shockingly lucid today it's wonderful

EA: +That r=minds m=, I do n==d to g=t Sipara som= stuff from Lush som=tim=. Mayb= th=n sh= can prop=rly b= brib=d into taking a bath.-

LC: [ ... Do I want to know the details Prisma? ]

ID: c'mere and i'll put my burning star hands on you.

ID: what's a lush.

SA: Someone who drinks and flirts

ID: ...sip is already kinda a lush isn't she.

SA: also don't touch me with your grubby star hands

AA: lmfao. Y E S.

ID: i meant ea pris. but i'll grab you too. =:P

SA: at least use some sanitizer first

AA: accornding to the tabloids. and you. app. >:P

SA: oh! The betrayal

ID: i'm about to get in to the bath, i'll be hella clean. =>:I

SA: 🛁

LC: [ YYou most definitelYY will be, Hadean. ]

ID: just gotta, y'know. juggle a phone and try not smacking my broke ass arm on the way in.

EA: +Oh, right. Uh. Lush is sort of lik=... a plac= wh=r= you go to g=t, uh... bath products that ar= usually d=void of ch=micals that can b= harmful to your skin, and stuff? It's sort of hoity toity highblood stuff, but, th= stuff sm=lls r=ally good...- EA: +Also bath bombs. Mak= your whol= bath tub look lik= spac= or lik=, a uh... tropical, fruity thing. I am not th= b=st at this.-

ID: ...sips i want to go to a lush. =:I is there a lush on the drive.

LC: [ Well YYou'd have an easier time not having YYour phone with YYou, especiallYY if onlYY one of YYour hands is free due to the other... being broken. ] LC: [ What did YYou do at the carnival that YYou managed to break it? ]

ID: fought a jade with a halberd. duh.

ID has sent itstotesgettingbetter.png! Boy is that a broke arm. But it's giving a thumbs up.

LC: [ Oh. Well. ] LC: [ At least YYou are doing well, nonetheless. ]

SA: i am going to slap you if you don't stop using that hand

AA: .. gausia, wtf you trnying to buy me lush forn? >:}

SA: she is making unsubtle advances obviously

SA: 😐

AA: and y, we can find one. but also pls slap him, prni. AA: wtf is it out of the cast forn??

ID: it got itchy.

SA: HADEAN

EA: +This was a jok= that larg=ly got out of my hands, onc=... I finally und=rstood that no on= knows what Lush is.- EA: +Shut up, SA.-

AA: .. let me cornrnect that. you can buy me lush, Gausie, but you still ain't allowed in the trnap. soz. >:P

ID: just give the free lush to me. duh.

SA: 🤣

SA: gausia

SA: we've met before

EA: +I don't want to b= in your trap! It would b= an actual, lit=ral trap!-

SA: 🤔

EA: +... Wait, what? hav= w=?-

SA: Prisma

SA: coffee.

SA: you spilt everything

EA: +... - EA: +No, totally don't know you. Not at all.-

AA: loool, what.

SA: 🤔🤔🤔

ID: well then.

EA: +Okay, list=n, if I kn=w =v=ryon= I accid=ntly tripp=d into, spill=d som=thing onto, or, you know, I would, uh.... w=ll....- EA: +... know a lot of p=opl=.-

SA: but we talked

ID: let's move on to a more interesting topic. also if i don't reply very often, you try typing and washing your ass-length hair at the same time.

SA: well some of us cut our hair off and keep our arms in our casts like we're supposed to

ID: casts are evil torture devices.

SA: I am dragging my hands down my face.

ID: that are coated in a substance to make your skin itch under it.

SA: that is literally not how that works

AA: dude, when yrn arnm heals crnooked, I'm gonna have to rnebrneak it to set it strn8.

LC: [ Well, casts are meant to be kept on to help YYour bones staYY in one place while the break heals, Hadean. ]

AA: and I'm gonna make fun of you the entirne fucking time.

LC: [ BYY taking it off, YYou are making it worse. ]

SA: how did we know it was set straight the first time. Did anybody get him an x ray

ID: it's fine. does it look crooked? no.

LC: [ Just as Sipara said. ]

SA: Your face is going to look crooked if I see you again 👀

SA: but not really

EA: +W= can always just cut your arm off and g=t you a prosth=tic! I'll =v=n giv= you a discount!-

SA: oh.

ID: fuck that, my arm is going to heal straight as an arrow and i'm gonna shove it in alll of your faces.

SA: if it doesn't though...

ID: also x ray pris do i look like i'm made of money.

LC: [ If YYou saYY so. Then we will see. ]

AA: we didn't need an xrnay, I do this all the time, prni. >:}

AA: and n, n cutting off anything, omfg.

LC: [ And if YYour arm heals crooked and needs to be well uh... get it to re-heal the right waYY, I could paYY for YYour X-RaYYs. ]

ID: gee lc, thanks. it won't happen because i'm sturdy af but a+ using your powers for good right there.

AA: lmao, n. he's my patient, i totally got it coverned. >:}

ID: i mean who here hasn't broken bones before.

LC: [ I am not sure if that's a good thing, Sipara. ]

AA: haha, excuse me?

ID: hey sips is an a+ mediculler.

ID: i mean with all the fights she gets in to, patching herself up is enough to make her like. an expert.

AA: n, hush, let him finish, i am fucking curnious what mapboy thinks he knows abt mediculling.

ID: http://i.imgur.com/1AvMrPv.mp4

AA: >:P

LC: [ Well I am not sure if YYou got a medical training but YYour approach seems to be usuallYY more drastic, from what I can... see. ] LC: [ Not just from before but YYour general demeanour. No offense. ]

EA: +I got popcorn, who wants som=?-

ID: yoooo hmu.

LC: [ SorrYY to tell YYou but I am not here to start a fight through the internet, just state an opinion. ]

ID: sorry bud, you're in a fight now.

AA: oh, shit, if yrn not arnguing overn my crnedentials, yrn just qqing bc of my rnough pernsonality, then who the fuck am i to take offense?

AA: herne's an opinion: go choke on an entirne bulge. AA: xoxo. >:}

LC: [ ... No thanks. ]

LC: [ I'd rather not. ]

AA: rnly? yeah, guess not, wtf was I thinking. AA: go choke on yrn own bulge, how's that, brnah.

LC: [ Won't do that either, I am not nastYY. ]

EA: +Com= back to th= hot=l th=n!!!! B=for= w= =at it all.-

ID: i just got in the bath. =:'(

ID: got suds alll through my hair.

AA: now put conditionern in it. >:}

ID: i didn't buy any. you got conditioner?

EA: +Call room s=rvic=.-

AA: i am not trnekking overn to brning you conditionern. >:1

ID: i'm trekking over to you then. =:P can i use your trap to finish this bath.

AA: .. lmao, uhh. AA: y, surne, why not.

EA: +... you b=tt=r hav= a tow=l or I am actually going to call th= polic=.-

ID: dnw, i will not give you mental scars. got this sweet fucking robe.

SA: I left to get a frozen chai and I come back to this.

ID: sorry pris, you guys tell me to use conditioner, i gotta get it somehow.

SA: lord.

SA: maybe you need a bath set

AA: dw, it's warnm outside.

ID: i like baths. i just don't get them very often!

ID: omw sips, don't worry.

AA: and can a bathset beat my awesome conversation, prni?? obvs not. not even if you put my pan in a jarn with speakerns and those little floaties.

SA: 😦 I want to have bathtub conversations

ID: dnw pris, i'll still keep chatting on here while i'm chatting with sips. =:P

SA: yes but it's not the same as hearing your voice 💚

AA: go rnun a bath and it can be T W I C E of em. >:}

SA: 😂

SA: I could take a bath but I have no reason to. I'm still clean

ID: take a bath just for the fun of baths, duh!

AA: do it to paint yrn nails!

SA: mmrm

SA: paint my nails...

ID: man, sometime i'll drag the both of you to a hotspring.

ID: clearly that's the best option for bath chats.

SA: fine. I will draw a bath.

AA: make them prnetty! and glue shit in 'em.

SA: why would I glue things to them I have to work.

AA: and omg. >:} yyyy. therne arne, like, hot canals nearn my hive, but they'rne full of fish.

AA: to make them prnetty, duh, keep up.

SA: I don't have any bath bombs

SA: hot canals.. full of fish

SA: that sounds alarming

ID: i've found some springs that are fish-free. take some time off both of you and we can go.

SA: some fish eat skin in hot springs and it's good for you

ID: sips meant fish as in seadwellers. but that. eww.

SA: I'm going to drop my phone In here I'm sure

SA: oh.

SA; I thought she meant. Actual fish.

EA: +With th= discussion about sushi last night, I don't know if sh='s =v=r s==n a fish.- EA: +As in, an actual fish.-

AA: meant both. >:} but lmao, grnoss!

AA: ofc I did, nerndass, I lived on the coast forn two sweeps. seen, like, all the fish everny fish. evern the tentacle fish.

SA: you mean octopi and squids

ID: quick warning, almost to the room, hide your poor little blueblood eyes soon gaus.

SA: or jelly fish

AA: n, i meant tentacle fish. don't you brning that highblood shit into my hive. >:P

ID: my hand is full of phone so knock knock sips, hope you got the good conditioner in there. =:P

SA: 😠 I'll bring my high blood shit where I want

SA: okay I feel the joys of feeling slowly leaving.

SA: now I'm just tired. The bathtub tricked me

AA: brnb, brnb, be rnight therne.

ID: ahahah sorry pris. baths can be hella calming.

SA: you did this to me

SA: do you have a favorite scent

ID: i like spicy scents.

ID: but i don't know if they make hair stuff spicy.

ID: and by spicy i mean, like... cinnamon.

EA: +So do=s that m=an I n==d to r=turn th= jal=p=no bath bomb?-

ID: wow do i look like a masochist?

ID: i mean. the shoulder wound and broken arm might have thrown you off.

ID: so. fair assumption i guess.

SA: what about cinnamon and apple? Cardimom?

ID: apples smell alright, but just. anything spicy i like sniffing.

SA: oh, I should show you my cologne sometime, perhaps you'd like that.

SA: oud has a very specific scent.

SA: it's like sandalwood and spice.

ID: huh. sounds nice. let me sniff you up. =:P

SA: I will let you smell my wrist, let's keep a cap on sniffing.

ID: i'll take it. should've known you'd wear cologne. mr. fancy pants. =:P

SA: of course I do. I have a collection.

SA: it's one of my favorite things to shop for.

ID: sorry, got busy washing my hair.

SA: good, now it will be silky and beautiful.

SA: and not. bloody and dirty.

ID: I got the blood and dirt out of it like yesterday. =:P

SA: But was it washed and conditioned?

ID: i shampooed it! just not conditioner.

ID: it's hard to wash with just the one arm.

SA: If you keep complaining about it someone may offer to help you and I don't believe you want that.

SA: the more i listen the more i enjoy having short hair.

SA: I drink your tears.

ID: this is just some nice venting, not looking for sympathy/help! =:P

ID: yeah but my hair is cool as fuck.

ID: when i'm not dealing with a broken arm.

SA: You don't even deal with it when your arm isn't broken, though. It is pinned in a braid all the same.

SA: i am blowing disappointed bubbles into my bathwater i want you to know this.

ID: i brush it sometimes!

AA: n, no helping allowed, it'll be hilarnious when it frnizzes.

ID: ...does conditioner make it frizz.

ID: fucking rude sips. i wasn't told about this.

ID: now you gotta help me brush it so it doesn't.

AA: n, conditione AA: totally does make it frnizz, y.

SA: only if you use fluffing conditioner

AA: sinistern fucking shit rnight therne. >:}

ID: am i going to be fluffy now. =:I

SA: hotel conditioner is too cheap. I hope.

SA: I don't know. We'll have to find out who is right

AA: not if we brnush it, duh.

ID: hope you have a brush.

SA: you just said you wouldn't --

ID: where's the hairdryer.

ID: ...also should have brought clothes with me.

ID: i didn't think this through.

AA: i wasn't, but then he said i gotta, so w/e, w/e AA: do i look like i have a hairndrniern, dude? and

AA: lmfao omggg.

AA: p surne gausia is nevern gonna let you out of the trnap now, so, like, i hope you can eat soap. >:}

ID: hotels have hairdryers. i'll let myself out if i fucking have to. =:I the robe covers like. all of me.

SA: 😂

ID: unless the sight of my head, neck, and some calf are enough to kill her.

SA: possibly

ID: rip gausia then.

SA: I have to cease bathtub otherwise I will fall asleep here and I'd like to sleep in my bed

SA: see you later, Hadean, Sipara. Gausia.

ID: later pris.

AA: l8rn, dude.

ID: if gausia is gonna be a wriggler, come in here. =>:I

AA: see, if you wernen't a candle monstern, we'd have an easy solution. >:{ AA: lucky forn you, i am a fucking E N G I N E E RN.

ID: wtf is a candle monster.

AA: ... y'know, like, the wax museum things. except they'rne rnly fucking tall, and smothern ppl. also, coverned in wax. AA: get w yrn cinema, duh.

ID: i told you i don't watch movies. and why am i a candle monster.

AA: neway. Ï have made you the best fucking gift, and it's called S H E E T S. wrnap it like a tunic! voilaaa. >:}

AA: starnt watching them. be less lame!

ID: whatever, tunic sheets it is. and my phone speakers don't work and my husktop only works like. every now and then.

AA: and bc yrn also tall and drnippy. jfc, hads, keep up.

AA: prnobs bc you keep it all in a tent, dude. >:} js.

AA: also btw bettern be decent bc i am coming in in, like, five.

ID: my tent rocks and i'm decent af.