#he is PROTECTING HIM ARE YOU JOKING ???
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Daddy, don't go.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#jiang fengmian#Scenes that are tragic but still made me laugh: JFM wrapping the boys *right back up* after finding out it was YZY who tied them up.#I know he did it because he understands the severity of what's going on in lotus pier & the need to protect his children.#But it also comes off as 'Oh your mother said so? Yeah I'm not overruling her. Listen to your mother kids. I gotta go.'#You guys ever think about how the last time Jiang Cheng saw his parents alive it was them both pushing him away one last time?#I do!!! I sure do!!! Now you can too! Welcome to my sad little club. The refreshments are all saltwater.#And the subtle difference in who the parting is intended for. YZY meant to leave WWX with JC as a protector. JFM wants them both safe.#The reveal that Zidian responds to JFM aches so badly.#The fact the weapon she literally lashes out with also reveals her heart is so poetic.#I sure hope they can reconcile their feelings. I hope it all works out.#This is the last of the math boat jokes. Back to labeling the boats properly after this.
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deadclaws badassery where it's revealed Wade and Logan tested the distance on Logan's hearing.
Watch them hundreds of feet away from each other in the battlefield and all it takes to set Wolverine loose is for Deadpool to mutter "Logan."
gif credits to original owners!
#why?#because don't come into my house and tell me Wade doesn't have Logan wrapped around his finger. that's why.#especially when Wade is mortally compromised? all that regeneration and smartass banter that Logan loved? compromised?#non negotiable#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool#wolverine#logan howlett#deadpool 3#wade wilson#poolverine#deadclaws#deadpool 2024#AGAIN WITH THE SUPERHERO NAMES BEING DIFFERENT TO THEIR UNMASKED NAMES#The rest of the world can refer to him as Wolverine. the hero. the x men. deadpool's partner. sure.#i specifically want Wade to use Logan's name in this moment because i want to continue the love theme between them#romantic or platonic i genuinely don't care#Logan hears Wade say his name and he knows things are Drastic#Wade might be the type to call him Wolverine to his face in moments of joking. light hearted mocking.#one or two moments of sincerity including “You wanna know something? You're the best Wolverine.”#but “Logan.” through a mouthful of blood and a scratchy throat is different#we marvel x men kids know how protective logan can get over his students#what more over his partner?
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“the kids chose protective mom izzy in the divorce” is literally my new favorite joke to come out of s2 so far I’m utterly obsessed
#Ed haters don’t clown on this post btw this ain’t for you. this is a lighthearted joke from a fellow Ed liker don’t be bitchy in the tags#anyways I’m literally never getting over this concept it’s so funny but also so genuinely sweet to me#like I have never rlly considered izzy as a parental figure at all but it is SO fucking cute and important to me#how protective he is of the crew this season 😭😭#like?? he genuinely risks his life to try and protect them?? he shoots Ed to protect them??? shut up I love him#stern mom izzy is my new favorite thing. so so obsessed#also just. divorce joke hilarious to me. ofc.#he’s taking the kids bitch!!!! he’s getting full custody!!!!!!!#izzy hands#ofmd#ofmd spoilers
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Danny as Fenton takes a hit that no human boy should survive while in a different city (im going crossover here) and just transforms into phantom and pretends to be all sad that he died. Just for a moment. He then proceeds to kick the baddies ass. Claims he got ghost powers and fucks off. Imagine if Captain America or Batman saw this while failing ti protect him, hell or any hero type. Danny doesn’t think much on it and just goes on with his week. Continues being Fenton of course but what if he runs into whatever hero, but out if costume, saw him do that.
“How are you here? And alive?”
Danny holding a smoothie:”uhhhh I made a miraculous recovery”
He just shrugs it off and goes about his day. It isn’t until he finally gets some sleep later that night that he wakes up in a cold sweat realising he now knows their secret identity. “Oh well it’s neat I guess” starts to go back to sleep only to bolt back up “oh god now they know my secret identity”
Meanwhile said hero is too busy trying to figure out how to help this random kid to even be worried about the fact that they outed themselves. Someone else probably points it out to them and has to explain it twice before it gets thru.
#danny phantom#crossovers#dp x mcu#dpxdc#dp x dc#I like to use batman a lot cause his need to protect these kids probably makes him a little stupid#like imagine him in the batcave looking into fenton now and nightwing comes in starts asking about it#only to have to find out that bruce basically told the kid hes batman#except bruce is tired and worried so he isnt getting it#no B I mean like how does bruce wayne know the kid died. only batman saw it#if you are trying to make some sort of joke it’s not working. now please excuse me I have to figure this out#a sigh and facepalm#B imagine what the kid is gonna think when bruce wayne asks him how he is alive but batman watched him die.#slowly bruce stops typing and leans back from the computer#he freezes#eyes widening#a soft but sharp intake#oh#yea oh B geeze you must be tired if it took this long for you to get ut#bruce with his head in his hands realising he just messed up big time#maybe he should get more sleep after all#as for the mcu I would like to think it was hawkeye or hulk#I like hulk cause it’s also a bruce but I like hawkeye more. guy is very comfort character#clint just kid I saw you die now why don’t you explain that#danny giving him nothing till clints like come on it’s kinda messed up letting me think I let a kid die isnt it.#oh poor me loosing so much sleep watching a young boy become a ghost. I could hardly go on#danny rolls his eyes laying it on a little thick arent we old man#gasp! I will have you know I am only (insert haskeyes age here)#geeze you are waaayyy okder than I thought
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Anakin did at least once accidently call obi wan mom/mommy during his childhood since training with him and you can't never change my mind about that.
#i mean its only natural obi wan straightly became family for anakin#his mentor and brother and father best friend and mom#and it also helped that obi wan is so unbelievable mommy coded its not even a joke now#mommy-wan#like for real#he is such a soft caring warm protecting loving mommy ♡#plo koon is the dad equivalent of that for his men#wolf pack#one of his men also accidently called him dad once (wolffe most definetly)#anakin and wolffe had the most embarassing day but obi and plo had the day of their lifes#when you reach the highest rank of mentor/teacherhood:#accidental being assumed with a parental figure by your student(s)#star wars#star wars prequels#obi wan kenobi#star wars fandom#attack of the clones#revenge of the sith#the phantom menace#anakin skywalker#space jesus#the clone wars#plo koon#master plo koon#tcw wolffe#commander wolffe#jedi training
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Finally, my internal 90 year old persona was recognized
#genshin impact#afinna explores teyvat#genshin impact thoughts#I quite often joke that I feel very old even though I’m not so it was funny to suddenly get this in game#on the other hand can’t believe that aq made me like ororon so much#bc I straight up was like. nope don’t care when I saw him first#but he is. indeed. a grandson#and thus should be protected at all costs thank you for coming to my Ted talk#genshin impact 5.1#genshin impact natlan#genshin impact ororon
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No bc everything is okay when I see this picture
#he is PROTECTING HIM ARE YOU JOKING ???#protective blitzo#protective blitz#protective stolitz#I LOVE PROTECTIVE TROPES I EAT IT UP EVERY TIME#stolitz#stolas#helluva boss blitz#helluva boss#hellaverse
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funniest answer for "what happened during Jason's fight with Krios" is, rather than Jason having a physical one-on-one unarmed fight with Krios, Jason just tears Krios a new one re: legislation by chewing him out for unauthorized activity in a state park. Because one of Jupiter's big aspects is law!
Jason sends the entirety of the Titan Army forces in California marching out of Mt. Tam State Park with their tails between their legs with one strongly worded argument and some threats to inform San Francisco Fish & Wildlife. And he gets made praetor for it.
#pjo#riordanverse#jason grace#was joking about Jason both forgetting about but also being overly familiar with san fran's fish and wildlife legislation yesterday#what do you think are the chances that because of the Mist and him being raised by Lupa's pack that legally Jason's considered a wolf#a la Doofenshmirtz legally being an ocelot. cause the mortals are probably aware of Lupa's pack right?#they're a magic immortal wolf pack but they *are* just wolves. but Jason was a whole baby human.#the Mist would probably disguise him but not the pack as a whole. so it'd be funny if just as far as California is concerned#Jason is just a wolf pup from this random pack. and he pulls that out at random opportunities as a running joke#''Sorry. I'm protected under Wolf Conservation Law. Under the California and Federal Endangered Species Act it's illegal to harass me.''
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"why did Orpheus turn to check if Eurydice is there if he can just return to Hadestown if Hades really did lie about letting her go" that's the thing. he can't. the only reason he can enter Hadestown without taking Hades' deal/dying is because the lalalas open the way for him. Eurydice only gave him a chance after he showed her the power of the lalalas. and in Doubt Comes In, his lalalas no longer work - twice he tries to call on them, and twice he fails. he has lost the ability to wield their magic because he stopped believing their power can change the world. if he leaves Hadestown and Eurydice isn't behind him, she will well and truly be gone forever. of course he turns around. of course he can't take those final few steps out of the Underworld without making sure the lalalas worked.
#hadestown liveblog#listening to doubt comes in west end bootleg on repeat and going AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#very much in the same vein as ''why should orpheus trust hades''. it's not about him trusting HADES it's about him believing in his mission#and holding true to his beliefs. THOSE are the things he betrayed. he was supposed to believe hades would fall under his influence.#and hades DID!! but orpheus no longer believed he could hold power over a king.#he was no longer the boy who noticed hades looking at eurydice and placed himself between them as if he could protect her.#WHICH IS WHY I AM ANNOYED THAT THEY TURNED IT INTO A JOKE. LIKE. BRO. it is supposed to be IMPRESSIVE. you're supposed to be like#''oh damn orpheus you're so brave???'' but no broadway turned it into a haha ''look at this pathetic kid defying hades'' moment#ANYWAY. ORPHEUS I LOVE YOU.
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Hanguang-Jumpkick
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#xue yang#lan wangji#su she#blood#This was supposed to be no.69 but I forgot that I don't number the bonus episodes B*( In my heart it's 69.#LWJ hasn't had dialogue in 10+ comics but that's because his mouth has been busy biting and ripping and tearing into flesh#He and LXC never fought as children so he has all this pent up rough and tumble energy he needs to let out#A LWJ does not hunt for sport. A untamed LWJ hunts to protect his territory and a tamed one hunts on command#however it is very hard to get the loyalty of a LWJ. One must prove themselves worthy by demonstrating acts of standing up for justice#once a LWJ chooses you then he will stay by your side forever.#He will need daily nutrients in the form of head pets. Do not let him starve#I had a lot of alternates for the third panel line. Hanguang-jun-jitsu. Going for the Hanguang-jugular. Hanguang-judge jury and executioner#Hanguang-june means Hanguang-jokes
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i just think it's sooo interesting how every time someone needed to be the butt of a joke that subtly othered them within a group of masculine men or to get sensually pinned down and/or tied up or otherwise emasculated by a villain (almost always morgana which is also very telling) it was always closeted gay metaphor the titular merlin™️ or known arthurian bisexual g(a)waine. they really don't do homophobia like that anymore these days. which is probably for the best but when you add everything up it sure does paint an interesting picture of transgressive masculinity (and femininity in morgana's case)
#[morgana metaphorically and literally penetrates both merlin and gwaine] this is a homosexual act for everyone involved#bbcm#merwaine#gwaine x merlin#its them... the blоwjob brothers#e morgana!#the hierarchy among the men is also interesting like if merlin is there hes the butt of the joke and gwaine may even join in on the teasing#if merlin isnt there everyone gangs up on gwaine#and if neither of them are there its just arthur posturing and looking constipated in front of his men#in a lot of ways arthur is worse at performing masculinity than gwaine but his status protects him from critique#for as long as he postures which he never stops doing so hes fine <3#he did stop a few times in s1 and it was very compelling but they nipped it in the bud pretty quickly#meanwhile no amount of posturing can save gwaine hes like lets talk about ladiessss :)) and the other knights are literally like#[rolls eyes] go brush your hair or yap on the phone or eat an apple like the fruit you are#this sort of treatment is to be expected with merlin and morgana because they are so Visibly Other#but gwaine is a masculine action hero thats rough around the edges and they could STILL smell it on him. wild
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Alastor's Father
WARNING: period-typical racism, WW1, race-based murder
I see a lot of fics where Alastor's dad is a piece of shit and abusive, but I'd love to see one where Al's dad actually loves and cares for his family but was taken from them when Alastor was too young to remember much about him.
Maybe he died as a soldier in WW1 or made it back to the US only to be killed some other way. If he was black, then those odds go way up unfortunately.
We don't know much about Al's parents but if it's still canon that he's creole, then that means at least one of his parents has black ancestry. A lot of the fics I've seen give him a black mom/white dad, but I think it would be interesting if both his parents were mixed too.
Anyway, what I'm getting at is if Al's dad was killed when he was still little, then they wouldn't recognize each other in hell now would they?
Al's dad sure does love his family, but everyone else can fuck off. And ooh boi did he earn his place in hell trying to protect them, not that heaven cared about his motives.
The second he finds out Alastor the Radio Demon is his baby boy? Hell hath no fury like a protective parent. He doesn't give a flying fuck about the atrocities Alastor has caused, that's his baby and no one is going to hurt him while he's not double-dead.
#hazbin hotel#alastor#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel au#alastor's father#now if we also gave alastor an abusive step-dad we could give him daddy issues AND a loving father#and also explain why he prefers the company of woman#cue Alastor's dad being overwhelmingly protective#Alastor's dad about Vox: Is this guy bothering you son?#I just want to see a fic with Al's dad trying his best and Alastor being confused over it#maybe they bond over stories about Al's mom#and dad jokes#pair this with trans! Alastor and Al's dad goes overboard with showing his support#Al's dad being the most stereotypical loving dad in existence#this was inspired by that one audio “I'm not. I fucking love my dad. My dad's fucking awesome.”
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Rewatching act 2.... yeah ISHA WATCH OUT FOR THE CYCLE ISHA!!!!! NOOOOO
#ambessa setting up the logs on a fireplace while literally adding fuel to the fire with cailtyn... subtelty#silco spent his whole life trying to rile the undercity together STUPID JOKE THAT IT IS you have the chance to pull it off#isha is the true revolutionary after all... jinx get up to her level#was jinx scared of having hallucinations when the girl she released was gonna touch her shoulder??? and then she didn't#what i find really funny is that warwick knows how to use elevators and that funicular to the prison#also there is a lot of blood when he appears in the prison.... it was surprising#vander recognizing jinx with the name of powder after she complained about it eariler its just crazy crazy crazy#people commenting that its unrealistic how caitlyn bests vi when they meet in episode 6 as if there wasn't a montage about how she lost her#edge because of alcohol and living like shit.... she's not like jinx lmao....#rewatching so recently is so weird i imagine it is as close as being dr manhattan as i can get it is literally happening all at once#also the people of piltover are so dumb... lets let the government implement martial law and put this 20 something with 0 political#experience on charge with the army of this outsider agent. alright. i can tell you guys dont vote in this oligarchy you know fuck all#well i guess in that case it isnt the people of piltovers fault... just the important families that contribute in this oligarchy...#putting count fagula in charge.... salo is speciallt dumb but we all knew that#katie leung needs awards btw.... and interviews#“do not test this or you will yearn for caitlyn's dungeons” be careful singed my friend vi fell for that and look at her... her dungeons...#vander reaching for isha not jinx.... OR VI.... she just stopped him#“hes gonna kill you” and vi fighting vander to protect jinx.... yeah#and then she trusts jinx and the beast turns into vander... he serves as a recognizing tool for their true selves...#their mom being so worried about how to name vi and then names the second one POWDER kahdksjsk never not funny... also the barber of zaun#when vi joins with jayce she unlocks this loser flop aspect of her mother's inheritance.... two losers joining to maximize their joint flop#also vander kinda giving up this promise to protect the girls instead of bettering zaun... how it puts him in a standstill bc it's either or#like damn there is nothing as undoing as a daughter for reals. she didnt experience that bc she died so now vander has to and here we are#episide 6 starts with the end of the episode when viktor drops that metal piece..... hello..... is this anything#“do you think this place could work” underground utopia.... DYNASTIES AND DYSTOPIA FEAR IS NEVER AN OPTION SO DYING'S NOT A REAL PROBLEM#didnt ambessa suspect anything when they spent loke a full minite staring at each other 😭😭 she's lost her edge...#just like when she clocked sevika but not jinx... when there's a strong butch in the area her radar gets jammed up#and caitlyn leaving her weapon behind... ambessa thought she was gonna fistfight warwick or something#the metal thing falling when viktor dies repeats THREE TIMES WHAT DOES THAT MEAN#watching arcane season 2
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it's funny. I keep making all these posts defending Aziraphale and it's because there's this annoying trend in the fandom to villainize him while simultaneously woobifying Crowley, so there's a need for more Aziraphale perspective
but I was thinking, if we stopped looking at fandom for a minute, and just regarded Aziraphale as a character, how would I criticize him or his choices?
then I realized I wouldn't cos my wife did nothing wrong in her life
#joking? ish?#idk man#like the biggest sticking points are what?#he wanted to change crowley and he abandoned crowley#both of which are just wrong#there was never another option for aziraphale#if you look closely at his character arc you'd realize so#he's a protector first and foremost#but alright you say he shouldn't have gone back to heaven anyway#and what?#try to protect humanity by egging on a bunch of 12 year olds again?#stand by and watch other angels be horribly treated?#and watch humans' lives be toyed with?#like seriously what was he supposed to do?#im genuinely asking here.#even if he didn't offer to change crowley even if crowley could tag along to help him#while remaining a demon#CROWLEY STILL WOULDN'T HAVE SAID YES#so. the solution is for him to just sit tight? and watch the world end when he could've stopped it from a position of power?#yeah great#maybe i wasn't joking after all#sary rants
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john @ sam
#has someone made this joke before....probably!#joke post but i'm also somewhat serious abt it alksjdflaks#like the sam-john dynamic was always equal parts suspicion and protection to me!!!!#the reason why john is such a great character to me? he's the world's biggest hypocrite <3#hypocrisy - secrecy - mistrust the trifecta of john traits like what a guy! it all boils down to keeping control over uncertainty#sam's kept at a distance not to spare him from the horrors of hunting - it's also bc he's a potential liability#2.01 “I should've never taken you along in the first place. I knew it was a mistake” <- speaks volumes!!#he's not taking that risk! it's easier to shut him out (while also reminding dean he isn't good enough. to keep him in line)#(went to the logan roy school of dividing and conquering his kids <3)#but also. the uneasy idea of sam as a potential threat needing to be monitored and contained#a son to protect from dark forces is also the same son who drew darkness into his home!#sam's first panic room? cage? being left alone in motel rooms#it speaks volumes that legacy he leaves behind for dean#is him literally ordering a hit on sam alksdjf#i love the line 'watch out for your brother' bc it carries that dual meaning of protection and suspicion so well#like 'watch out' meaning protect him but also 'watch out' as in keep an eye on that threat#j.txt
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just remembered a wip i had which was jay at uni meeting normal people and desperately trying to act cool and normal whilst internally screaming about being in a whole new place with all new people and not having his gang with him
#i only wrote one scene where jay meets one of his flatmates#and he’s trying to make casual normal conversation & asks her who her parents are#bc that has always mattered! on the isle or at auradon prep your parentage was also a Conversation Starter#and the girl is just like ……what. why do you want to know that#but she tells him and jay makes it into a joke like hehe oh yes i met them at a soirée once. amazing company#and the girl is like ok who are YOUR parents. knowing full well who he is#and jay says that his dad fosters puppies. and the girl says that sounds like a good life and he’s like ohhh just the BEST#i really. love exploring jay at uni i’ve written a couple of things i’ve never finished#like!!! for the first time for years he’s well and truly all alone!!!!#and at least the isle & ap had similarities. uni is just full of very normal people who don’t particularly give a shit#and jay who is like THE guy who cares about everything so much all the time and how people are reacting to him and he’s desperately trying+#to be so cool and unbothered whilst trying not to revert to his isle tactics regarding people who may be threats#just. being somewhere so so new. with no one he knows. everyone else is so far away. and jay is missing his gang like he’d miss+#his body parts. and it’s like. jays always buried his own emotions & hurt so he can better protect his gang#and now he has no gang to protect#and he is just laid absolutely bare. and also constantly stressing about not being there for the others#i just think he’d have an absolutely awful start to uni <3#descendants#jay son of jafar
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