#he does not know how to handle himself normally when things dont go his way huh

[abnomi]

random assorted headcanons for Turbo because I like thinking and having fun !!!! 🎉

Read More to Find Out...or are you too scared?... i bet ur too scared ahaha youre too scared Lol! Hahaahaaa!!!

The steering wheel of his kart is covered in bite marks, similar to how one would bite their favorite pencil. he bites things to mark his territory because Nobody is gonna touch that unless they want all of his diseases (150+).

i just know he was fighting to restrain himself not to chew on any of the candy civilians

when it comes to music, he doesn't see the point of listening to it. he doesn't have enough patience to really take it in; to him, it's just a thing that exists and not much more than that ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ ∵⁠ )⁠_⁠/⁠¯

adding onto that point, this guy listens to metal clanking sounds and loud engine roaring for entertainment because he likes things that would overstimulate any normal person. turbo is incredibly sensory-seeking and will do anything for The Sensations

someone should take him to a heavy rock concert i think it would change him a little. keep that thang on a leash

related to being sensory-seeking, i think he would absolutely love running his hands over random textures. if anyone has run their hands along a wall while walking alongside it...He does that...If u know u know... he is SO stimmy its unbelievable. Unreal.

very pain-tolerant. he'll whine and complain about it for attention, but physical hurt really doesnt bother him much until it gets in the way of what he wants to do.

funnily enough, he is very picky when it comes to temperature. he can handle getting ran over but if its 1° too hot or cold he'll start nagging and nagging for it to go back to normal. turbo really needs his own enclosure i think it'd do him a lot of good

this is a more popular headcanon and its canon-leaning, but he's an artist :-] he usually sticks to graffiti art because its generally considered more "rebellious and cool" but he also sketches cars, design decals, and other stuff when hes alone!

i would love to see his process of character designing king candy because i dont think he really knew what he was doing

he was just like "ok what does a generic king look like. uhhhhh.... 1, old and jolly like santa claus.... 2.... uhh crown..... 3......... purple.... FUCK YEAH im so good at this!!!!🔥🔥🔥"

i just noticed how his design has like 0 actual candy motifs aside from his bow being a candy wrapper and his shoes having those little gumdrop end pieces. what was he THINKING

while King Candy has a lisp, i think it's a coverup for his actual voice because of how goofy and recognizable it is. Overall its the same as his regular voice, he just gets silly with it. i noticed that he still does retain some of his lisp when hes screaming his lungs out at Vanellope, however, so maybe he genuinely does have a lisp that makes itself known when furious :3

another thing i noticed is how he hisses his S's. very cool very cool the reptilian

@/tasticturbo made a post abt how he has tinnitus from the constant noise in his game and i couldnt agree more

AND THE PRESCRIPTION GLASSES. where did he get those...he needs to See

side note, the aforementioned account has made so many interesting analyses on turbo and theyre all so insightful. i recommend u check them out

i think he gets migraines from stress. constant buzzing or pain flood his head but hes like "IDGAF i need to DO something at ALL TIMES no matter what"

hes like a shark in that way. if hes not moving he'll die instantly. idk a lot about sharks or if thats how it works srry but im going off of what the Worms are saying to me and i dont have much to work with

i think a really big contributer as to why he lacks in the self care department is because he fails to notice that something in his body is wrong. hes far too distracted on something he thinks is more important than remembering to Eat Food or Drink Water or Wash Himself or

he's like "WHY DO I FEEL LIKE SHIT ALL OF THE TIME!!! I HATE MY LIFE" and he hasn't slept in 4 days

hes so me. Sorry.

i dont think turbo is necessarily suicidal, but the way he behaves shows a clear disregard for his own safety and wellbeing. he thinks that he knows what he needs but he really doesnt :-[ i think he has some kind of immortality complex, feeling untouchable and like nothing could get to him. as scared as he was when ralph was about to turn him into sloppy mush, he didnt take the threat very seriously. like it was some kind of joke

his kart regenerates every time his game starts up, so what if he smashed it into buildings for fun. He's the number one fan of car accidents. he is all about that shit

i think his living space would literally be a garage btw. its a place to sleep and a space for his car all in one!! he thinks its very convenient and awesome but i think he is coping. he has some old dingy stained sheetless mattress that he has never washed in his life and its covered in dirt and smoke particles. no wonder he has such heavy eye bags Dude Please

the turbo twins have a garage used in a similar way, and while its still pretty shitty, they still at least TRY to maintain it. they just fight a lot over who has to care of it. nobody taught them how to take turns ever

but this aint about them. maybe another day

i think that turbo would find comfort in garbage and keeping it around because its familiar to him. a big clean empty space would make him so mad and if anyone moves even an inch of scrap off to the side he will throw a fit. he generally doesnt pay attention to his surroundings but when its his personal space he is 1093 times more neurotic

i think the big empty castle he stole wouldve been a big transition for him. maybe it helped him clear his mind a little more to practice his tricky schemes...it helped him get more subtle

thats all i have for nowww ty for reading ^_^ if anyone else has any wacky ideas pleeeease tell me i would love to hear them!!

[killjoy-prince]

I FORGOT..... JUMIN STEALS HIS CAR IN JAEHEE'S ROUTE AFTER SHE QUITS

[windupaidoneus]

playing inquisition first then the other games truly gave me whiplash about cullen. the way my characters feel & act toward him are very much a byproduct of how Mixed Feelings my feelings are about him 😭

[wonwoonlight]

are you like me too? / kwon soonyoung

⇢ Soonyoung x fem!Reader

⇢ word count: 1.1k

⇢ angst // breakup(??)!au // comfort?

⇢ A/N: i wrote this in like, 30 minutes bc i was watching the epik high and hosh's performance in akmu's show and got a random burst of writing juice so. enjoy? i'm obsessed w the song and this particular part btw so it's definitely inspired by that. as always not proofread but do enjoy somehow lol

요즘 뭘 먹고 마시고 어떤 행복을 찾는지 what are you eating and drinking these days? what kid of happiness are you looking for? epik high ft. hoshi - screen time

[ - - - ]

Soonyoung has never felt so stupid.

But, then again, being drunk and regretful at the same time is an obvious recipe for disaster.

He doesn’t even usually get drunk, as he’s often already passed out before he gets to that point. But there’s something about tonight that compels him to keep on throwing back drinks over drinks even though Jihoon is already looking at him in worry and Chaeyoung is trying to stop him from getting more.

But of course, drunk Kwon Soonyoung is even more hard headed than normal Kwon Soonyoung and Jihoon eventually tells the younger girl to just stop trying because perhaps the guy needs it.

After all, Jihoon knows Soonyoung has been regretting his decision to end… whatever it is he had with a certain someone and he hasn’t had the chance to properly throw himself a pity party that it’s probably been eating him inside out for the past week.

“Why the fuck did I…” He mutters to himself, not even caring that two of his friends are there worried out of their minds. He eventually kicks them out an hour later because he can only handle so much pity being thrown his way in his own fucking house. 

He’s pitiful–pathetic, he knows, but it doesn’t make things any better and he does need this to (hopefully) make peace with whatever stupid decision he made last week to end things with you.

You’re not even his girlfriend–and whose fault is that?–he swallows another shot bitterly. And yet suddenly not having you any longer feels more painful than the last time he broke up with his ex-girlfriend.

Is it simply the alcohol, bubbling thoughts into his mind? Amplifying the pains even though it’s not really all that?

He glares at his phone, silent with nonexistent notifications from you. And then he looks at the mirror and glare at himself for pushing himself into such a situation.

Why did he think it was a good call to cut you off his life when it was him who talked to you first, asked for your number, begged you for a chance to go on dates, and now grovelling in his own room because he told you that he thinks it’s better to stop seeing each other when you’re not even yet in a relationship.

What was there to end, really?

A possibility, perhaps. 

Love that was possibly growing in your heart that he cruelly plucked when it hadn’t even bloomed.

Is that a good thing, then?

Would it hurt more for you if your feelings had grown deeper than what you currently harbour towards him?

He takes his phone and scrolls through your old texts once again. He can probably recite them in his sleep at this point, but he doesn’t care because he misses you and he wishes he still has you–your texts, your laughter, your touch, your voice–you. 

🧡: look at this dumb dog lmaoooo

how can u call him dumb :(

hes cute u meanie :(

🧡: //youre/// dumb🙄🙄

🧡: you know i dont mean it like that 😠😠😠😠

🧡: how dare you make me a villain against dogs!!!!

He takes a deep breath as he plays the video you sent for the nth time, still having it in him to smile at your small dog trying to jump into the sofa even though you had laid out a perfectly new dog stairs right next to it.

He presses his lips together at the sound of your laughter in the background, probably the only way he’s still able to hear it now. 

It’s only been a week. He knows it’s only been a fucking week. But he’s already wondering how you’re doing and who’s making you laugh, if you get to eat that dumpling that you’ve been wanting to try since last month, if you’re sending your dog videos to someone else now, if you’re still watching the drama that you were watching with him.

…If someone’s holding you because, maybe… and just maybe… you’re also as sad as he is.

He hopes you’re not though. He doesn’t wish this wrenching feeling in his chest upon you.

He hopes you don’t like him enough to be as sad as he is.

He hopes you don’t like him enough to drink yourself to sleep–to numb the pain and silence the voices inside your head.

Closing his eyes, he contemplates on calling you. But he remembers that it was him who rids himself of that choice.

“Hello?”

Fuck. He’s even imagining your voice now.

“Hello?” Your voice calls once again, and Soonyoung grips his phone tighter because it’s getting too real and perhaps it is time to stop drinking. “Soonyoung? Are you there? Are you okay?”

He jumps when he realises it’s actually you, panics when he realises he accidentally presses call when he’s too deep in his thoughts. For someone who contemplated on calling you just not too long ago, he’s suddenly hyper aware of the situation and no longer sure what to say.

He opens his mouth to say something, but a violent cough makes it out of his lips–enough for him to hit his chest because it feels like he’s about to vomit though there’s nothing in his throat.

He hears you panic from the other side, and as much as he wants to tell you not to worry and apologize, he couldn’t do it because his head is spinning and a part of him wants you to know that he’s hurting and he’s regretting. 

You already hang up once he’s calmed down.

And it’s thirty minutes later someone knocks on his door, his eyes widening in shock when he finds you on the other side, seemingly running out of your place in a hurry because you simply have a jacket over your pajamas. 

“Are you okay?” You look up in worry, your hand already busy trying to see his temperature. It’s when you realize that Soonyoung has been looking at you in silence that it finally hits you that you’re not supposed to do this.

That he… he breaks up with you before you even begin dating and you’re probably out of your fucking mind for thinking that you should rush to him the moment you think he might need help.

Mistaking his silence as resentment, you quickly retract your hand and apologize. But before you can even turn away, Soonyoung pulls you into his place and closes the door and then wraps his arms around you.

You can’t even begin to comprehend what’s happening, but when you feel his body shaking and hear him trying to hide his tears on your shoulder, you decide it doesn’t matter.

For whatever reason, Soonyoung is hurting.

Whether he’s hurting because of you or some other reason, he’s hurting and he’s looking for comfort in you if the way he holds you so tight that it hurts a little and the smell of alcohol on him says anything.

You hug him back and Soonyoung cries harder. 

[ - - - ]

©wonwoonlight – all rights reserved. I don’t allow any reposting, translation, and any other kind of redistribution of this fic. Please tell me if you’re aware of anyone doing this without my permission.

A/N: wow been so long since i wrote for him???

[riotlain]

You still take requests???

If so could you write hcs about batboys realizing they're in love 🥰 (with male reader if you could) (if you did before could you share link 🙏) Love you...

IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG JT GOT BURIED UNDER DRAFTS IM SORRY 😭😭

THIS IS A NWLNW BLOG!! WOMEN DNI

Dick Grayson

When he realizes hes in love with you

HES DOWN HORRENDOUS

ok he's like probably really bad at hiding his feelings so he ends up like flirting like prolly more often

Bottom of the barrel shit sometimes too

Bro would straight up say "Nice cock" if he had balls

Batfam teases him for how obvious he is

Depending on whether or not youre a superhero he's gonna be protective

Like yea as a civilian hes protective enough. Gotham is very dangerous!!

If you're a superhero too than he'll probably be a bit less protective... or atleast try to be

"Y/n can handle dealing with Poison Ivy himself it'll be fine... I'll go show up just in case."

If you're a villain though he's always the one to arrest you (he lets you go)

He aint the elaborate plan type of guy when it comes to this

So he one night jusy thinks "Yea im def gonna fess to him"

So no matter if youre civilian, hero, or villain he'll confess with a bouquet of flowers under the moonlight with some shit pick up line

Jason Todd

Used to have internalized homophobia but now hes over it... mostly

If youre a villain he'll straight deny his feelings for the longest time

Civilian or hero though? He'll definitely flirt

As in he just shows that he wants to protect you I guess

It honestly took him a while to realize he had feelings for you

Like yeeaaa hes gotten with alot of women and all but like with you? Something is hitting different and he doesn't know what

Roy finds out for him

He found out and teased Jason and Jason is just like "Wait what🧍‍♂️"

So with this new found crush how will Jason approach it?

Hes either really blunt or will completely avoid it all together 💀💀

Like i'm ngl you gon have to make the first move

Tim Drake

He found out he was bisexual and really went "Oh🤨??...OH😲"

Like if you just go to school with him he'll like try to hang out with you more

If you're a hero he's going on patrol more often just to hang around

And if youre a villain💀💀 He definitely tries to keep up the hero facade but like

Fucks it up with getting nervous

"I dont wanna hurt him too bad so he hates me. Wait he's trying to kill me though. I think he is???"

Has definitely lost a few fights with you bc of that 😭😭

Damian found out first (analytical lil shit) and made fun of him

Not in the homophobic way but in the way where his brother has a crush and looks like an idiot

"Drake you look like an utter idiot."

He tries to be smooth (Advice from Dick ofc) and fails

He does the thing where he tries to lean against a wall and fell the other way😭😭

Man just ask him out so he can quit embarrassing himself please

Damian Wayne

Def has internalized homophobia sorry

You know he isnt the best at his feelings so when he's around you he goes a bit crazy-

'I think of Y/n as a friend. Why would I think more of him as more?? Is it normal for me to like boys???? Dear god.'

Asks Alfred about it (One of the batbros prolly heard him though and barge in I'm ngl)

He isn't sure how to go about uh... "Courting you" as he calls it

Like yea he gets the kinda stuff to do for girls he's read many novels on that

But boys??? Hes stumped

He ends up stalking all the couples in his school for an answer

And probably ends up avoiding you :((

Whenever you try to confront him he just says "Its nothing." and leaves

Buuttt one day he ends up spilling everything on accident

[diazisms]

hi bia, I want to know your opinion re eddie cheating and latino culture/catholicism. I feel like in many ways a man cheating is something so normal in latin families (idk how this applies for latin people in the us but it's definitely a thing when living in latin america) and that's something that doesn't cause as much struggle with catholicism and "sin", as being queer does. I find it interesting how of course there's a loss that eddie thinks may happen if he cuts that last link to his religion connected to latino culture by coming out/coming to terms with his sexuality, that just doesn't seem to happen with other "sins"... idk if you've watched Brooklyn 99, but in there there's a Latina that comes out as bi to her parents and in the scene they basically tell her they'd rather she was dating someone married than admit that she was queer, and I feel like that's it, even tho I'm not sure eddie is aware of, he's falling into this (i believe) specific latino man stereotype where it's okay to do a lot of bad things, things maybe not accepted by the religion but unfortunately accepted by the culture, as long as you DON'T do the worst thing ever, which is being queer... idk if this makes sense lol, maybe it's not a thing lol, you dont have to post it I just dont have any other latino people i follow that may understand it, sorry

god, yeah, it's totally a thing. i grew up in texas but i was born and now live in latin america and this is so, so true. there are sins men are allowed to commit in latino communities because the sins are still "masculine". cheating on your girlfriend (they're not even married) is nothing. who cares. it still aligns with the misogyny that runs so rampant in latino culture. eddie sleeps with multiple women even though he has a girlfriend? oh, she wasn't enough him. she wasn't doing her job to keep him satisfied. it's a moral failing on her part, not his. and eddie's not that kind of guy, we know that, but this is all he learned growing up. it's very, very easy to fall back on the excuses you've heard a dozen times even when you know it's cruel. eddie dates two women at once and doesn't tell either of them? he's a firefighter, he's a single father, his life is stressful enough. let him have two women so when one gets high maintenance and irritating he can go to the other.

this is real! this is so real! it's so fucked up!

eddie breaks up with both marisol and not-shannon and gets with buck, though?

that'd be a problem. i have no doubt in mind eddie grew up hearing gay as an insult and faggot thrown around casually because homophobia is casual, not only in latino communities, but in the american south in general. he saw the way men who cheated would show up to mass with their wife against their side. her eyes were always so heartbroken, but that's something he's allowed. it's his right as a man. how can you fault his nature?

queerness is wrong, though. it's an abomination. you can't even confess to your sins because the church won't let you inside anymore. eddie can feel guilty for cheating on marisol all he wants, but guilt over something he's allowed is still better than bone deep shame over something he has not control over being.

and eddie's gonna hate himself for it! he's done so much to unlearn the worst parts of machismo, the parts that hurt him the most as a child, but god is it easy to fall back on when you need an excuse. his dad was absent most of his life growing up, but that's okay because he was providing. men don't sin for no reason. their wife isn't enough, they need to provide for their kids, their kids are a little too queer and need fixing. a heavy hand is better than an eternity in hell.

it's so complex. it's such a complicated relationship with himself, with religion, with being latino. god can judge him but how will he handle the judgment from his family. the church can hate him all they want but how is he supposed to handle the side eyes and whispers when he shows up to his high school friend's wedding and there's no plus one because it's either show up single or show up with a man.

men are allowed sin. men are allowed moral failing.

men are not allowed queerness.

and as much as eddie has been doing so much good work to unlearn that, the nasty, nails in your skin part of growing up latino are just as impossible to shed as the skin that covers your bones.

(also, yes, i did watch b99 and i remember that!)

[briliantlymad]

padme time travel plot bunny bouncing in my head

theres a good chunk of time travel fics where obiwan travels back or anakin does. but not enough where padme travels back in time and decides she's not letting her husband and the world she loves go to shit. and just. orchestrates an assasination with her handmaidens. this is padme amidala people i really do think she's capable of handling the entire situation really well. I feel like a padme armed with the knowledge of the future really would do whatever it takes if it meant keeping anakin and her kids safe.

Like i genuinely do believe that the reason padme was willing to leave the republic behind and take anakin with her was cus she was disillusioned with the republic by then. she knew anakin was a symptom of a failing republic not the cause. and at that point she'd forgiven him so much what's another thing to the list? she's back in time, she's not going to hold anakin responsible for crimes he's yet to commit, there's good in him. she knows he's capable of far greater good than he thinks himself to be.

palpatine is dead and she thinks everything will be ok now she doesnt have to worry much about the clone wars cus she knows what to do and anakin's capable of a lot when he doesnt have a snake whispering in his ear. i just want her to have a good chunk of time where she believes that with palpatine out of the way things will go back to the normal. that palpatine and his schemes was the only reason democracy fell to an empire and the clone wars continued as long as they did. and for a time they do.

Anakin gets to come home to her more often. she's able to gather support for her bills as the time passes. but. things aren't moving as fast as she'd like. she understands that progress takes time but with palpatine out of the way things should've gotten significantly easier. only its not. the rot runs deeper, its entrenched in the very soul of the republic.

and i need her to be completely annoyed and angry as things only get worse as and Dooku comes out on top and maul is still causing problems all over the galaxy. its in a sith's nature to take their master's place. so it doesnt make much difference to dooku. in fact. he's glad for it. now he can carry out his grand plans for an ailing republic and show the order how far astray they've gone without palpatine looming over his shoulder.

anyway i dont really know where i'm going with this. i'd like to think she'd try for the chancellorship and fall down into the alure of power for the right reasons. what's the harm in using the ill gotten powers of palpatine's chancellorship if she's doing it for the greater good of the republic?

on the other hand, padme is just as likely to pack her shit up and grab anakin and leave as things continue to crumble. and when an empire forms as she'd predicted only with dooku at its head. she's far better prepared with her rebellion and less jedi die. more disaster control cus she probably wont be able to prevent the fall of the republic on her own

[adidegmez]

spn s6 spoilers

I know there are many spelling mistakes in the text. but I wanted to share anyways. If I don't forget, I'll make arrangements tomorrow.

s6 ep1(exile on main st.)

hi dean😁. dean is happy. he is living a normal life. we entered with a happy music. everything will go bad, right? his old habits won't leave him. he is still running into danger. sam and samuel is back that is a good thing but i think bad guys are behind this.

s6 ep2(two and a half men)

i love soft dean. i love him no matter what. he would've made a great father. i still can't trust campbells and sam(a little). lisa understands dean and i love her for this.

s6 ep3(the third man)

btw what happened to the father shapeshifter. I thought they would catch him in this ep. I love teleportation. Dean's reactions to the teleportation are very funny.

s6 ep4(weekend at bobby's)

i love seeing bobby. i missed seeing dean but i really loved this ep. i am glad bobby got out.

s6 ep5(live free or twihard)

sam let the vampire turn dean into a vampire. why sam? he litterally watched it. sam isn't sam. he is different. he let his brother turn into a monster. idc if there is a cure what if he drank blood dean wouldn't drink i know he would rather die than drink. which he did. but how could sam do that. dean could never be a monster. even if no one stops him he'll stop himself. i am glad dean learned what sam did. he doesnt know why he did it neither do we but its good that he knows he cant trust him. no dean you can't trust sammy. he isn not the sam we know and love. either he changed or he is not the real sam. either way he is not the person he used to be and we cannot trust him. and sam and samuels deals are different. samuel hid djin from winchesters. and samuel doesnt know whats up with sam. It may have been the same person who brought them back, but I think something different must've happened afterwards.

s6 ep6(you can't handle the truth)

dean couldn't handle the truth. did sam deserved the beating i dont know. he is different but even if he cant feel anything i think he must know what is wrong and what is right. he really let dean be a monster. i dont know how he can redeem himself. i hope he can, really. but i dont know how he can after all af this. and what is sam if he is not human? the goddess of truth couldn't have lied.

s6 ep7(family matters)

what do you mean his soul is gone cas? Sam is lying, again. i know he cant feel but he must know the difference in right and wrong. i love crowley some times but most of the time i want him dead.

s6 ep8(all dogs go to heaven)

sam really doesn't has a soul. he makes logical choices. but they need emotions sometimes.🤷🏻‍♀

s6 ep9(clap your hands if you believe…)

aliens, huh? is gabriel back? funny ep. i love dean's reactions. and i love sam trying to understand emotions. at least he is trying.

s6 ep10(caged heat)

when i learned about cas on the internet i thought we'd see him often in the show. but he is rarely on the show. i hope we'll see him more he is so funny. i am not sure if sam should have his soul back either. i dont think crowley is really dead. he'll come back.

s6 ep11(appointment in samarra)

sam's gone too far. he tried to kill bobby. i hope this sam will be gone for good and we can have old sam back.

s6 ep12(like a virgin)

sam might be back. it's nice to see sam care. i missed him. soulless sam wasn't sam. and i can see itin his face. the way he looked. i love jared padalecki. mother? is she Echidna from greek myth(percy jackson😁). might be🤷🏻‍♀.

s6 ep13(unforgiven)

i really missed caring sam.

s6 ep14(mannequin:3 the reckoning)

i really liked lisa and dean. and ben of course their little family was beautiful. i think dean was genuinly happy with them. i now believe sammy when he says he's got dean's back and so does dean.

s6 ep15(the french mistake)

i love balthazar. omg i didnt know this would be the ep where they go to the real world or something like that. i thought that was in later seasons. im so excited. this ep is amazing. what is wrong with the angels? they have no difference from the demons.

s6 ep16(…and then there were none)

rufus and bobby might be my favorite hunter duo after winchesters. i was really angry with sam and i didnt know if i could love him the way i did before all the bad things happened but after soulless sam i really missed old sam and i love how he cares about dean i love how he would kill anyone for dean and i love he is back. he did some bad thing but he always tried to save the world and dean. and i love him. and i really hated soulless sam. but i am glad we got soulless sam for a little while thanks to him i still love him the way i did before all the demon thing. rip rufus.

s6 ep17(my heart will go on)

ellen and jo are alive. ellen and bobby are married! they don't know about titanic. this must be a parellel universe. and i liked this universe already. [KAZ 2Y5] is back. impala is gone.

s6 ep18(frontierland)

somethings are really wrong with angels. dean can pull off any look. cas is scaring me, little bit.

s6 ep19(mommy dearest)

Jefferson starships i love dean's face when he says that. dean, you are a genious. i hope eve is really dead(probably not). cas and crowley, huh? they make a good team i guess. but this will make dean mad.

s6 ep20(the man who would be king)

cas looked at us, right? castiel brought back sam and he lied. dean will be devastaded. dean really trusts him. i would've trusted him too. dean has a point. but i saw what he did. cas lied to their faces. crowley manipulated cas. every bad thing ha ppining in spn is because of manipulative demons. first ruby then crowley. And yet a father abandons his child.

s6 ep21(let it bleed)

i knew balthazar would help. dean sad again. i wish he could just live with lisa and ben.

s6 ep22(the man who knew too much)

how could cas do that to sam? balthazar was right. he didnt have to help but he did anyways, is a good angel. cas is really changed. he broke the deal. even demons wouldnt break deals. cas why did you kill balthazar? he was just trying to help dean. you've got to be kidding me. angels and demons they always ruin everything. i really thought cas wouldnt go this far. but he did. i know some spoilers but i am not sure what they mean but cas must go back to normal. I know he will make peace with the Winchesters. hopefully soon.

i would watch new season now but i just slept 4 hours this morning so i have to sleep. I'll watch new season in the morning.

[hopeless-eccentric]

ok so now i actually have the energy to address this! let’s talk about boromir

i think my biggest issue with the way boromir gets characterized is that you see a lot of 1) prideful, near-spoiled cautionary tale characterization or 2) least “moral” member of the fellowship characterization, and i really just dont see either of them. if anything, i find him to be a very moving character with complex motivations that unfortunately get missed a lot because theyre not incredibly blatant and a bit hidden in the appendices

so boromir was raised to be an heir of what we know denethor sees as their kingdom, and faramir even mentions a young boromir asking why the stewards weren’t just considered kings after 1000ish years. a lot of what comes off as “pride” isnt just this guy being a dick, it’s directly what he’s been raised to think. he’s spent years learning how to be a good leader of a country he sees no reason not to lead. i wont deny he’s a proud character, but his reaction makes sense from someone raised to see this country as his responsibility. he’s not just gonna leave it the hands of some guy

to dig into that more, we know from the appendices that as a kid, boromir was his brother’s “protector” (the placement of this passage suggests that this may have been from their father, though it’s possible that faramir was just an incredibly bullyable child), but assuming either, he’s spent most of his life singlehandedly keeping what he loves safe. for faramir, he wouldve been his only supportive family after the death of his mother, and with the whole “best man in gondor” title going on, it doesnt seem like he’s in a place to get a whole lot of support or help when he needs it. im not saying boromir’s got older sister syndrome, but--

another thing along that line that pisses me off. especially when two children are close, favoritism towards one kid and maltreatment of another is going to fuck BOTH of them up. for one thing, if one child is constantly praised for successes and the other is constantly berated for failures, how supported or able to ask for help do you think kid A is gonna be? that is not a way to raise a kid if you want them to be able to handle pressure or failure normally 

as for the ring, this is a guy who’s got the weight of a nation on his shoulders. if this is the weapon that could singlehandedly save his home and his people and he just passes up on it? if the world ends and he couldve stopped it? that’s horrifying, on top of the fact that boromir’s probably got some nasty ingrained issues with failure from his childhood

and what REALLY gets me is the attitude that boromir was somehow “more evil” than the other party members for being taken over by the ring. resisting the ring is treated as one of the best markers of heroism throughout the text (galadriel, gandalf, faramir, etc), and boromir cant pull it off immediately, but he DOES IT. even in his last words, he tells aragorn he failed, but aragorn replies “no, you have conquered.” he’s talking about the ring man! boromir’s not necessarily naturally the most susceptible to the ring, he’s just more psychologically worn down than the other party members and the least supported. but he MAKES IT. he doesnt get gollumed, he doesnt waste away, he doesnt lose himself. he dies as boromir, as he was in life, protecting the people he cares about

and what really breaks my heart is that in the silmarillion, there’s an insinuation that because humans fear the Valar but love the ocean, most “miracles” are done through water. when faramir talks about finding boromir’s body, frodo points out that it wouldve taken a miracle to get him over the waterfalls safely, but faramir says it couldnt have been a dream because it left his shoes wet. so putting two and two together, the Valar step in to perform a rare miracle to bring boromir home

so at the end of the day, boromir was a man, and he was so much more than proud, and so often, his “proudest” decisions are motivated by fear. he wasnt the least good of the Fellowship, just the most troubled and the least supported. he was a protector, a man of his people, and a hero

anyway next time someone reduces him to just the “least moral member of the Fellowship” im gonna blow a gasket

[kooksbunnnn]

im sorry but jungkook literally acts like he’s the victim when he’s the one who cheated, never communicated or told his wife what’s going on in his current life?

why is he acting like he needs sympathy when he was the one who choose to sleep with another person even though he was the one who was in a committed relationship why didn’t he cry and act like a victim too in that moment? i don’t know how to give a person advice when it comes to cheating because i refuse to give that person a second chance but if i was oc i think him crying, walking on eggshells around me, not telling me anything related to his job or life outside of our relationship and me only becoming aware of it by other people wouldn’t want me to reconcile and move forward if that makes sense? i mean she’s literally pregnant why does she have to be the dominant person and make decisions for both of them when he’s the one who’s at fault? she has so much on her plate and i don’t think she deserves any of this. she deserves to be doted on, cuddled and praised for carrying a tiny human being but instead has do deal with a overgrown man child and his problems because he’s not capable of getting anything done on his own. i also don’t want you to think im bashing your character but i just can’t for the life of me see them being happy when he doesn’t show any growth from his past actions that hurt her. im really trying to understand him i really do but i don’t like to see people acting like a victim or cry 24/7 for the things they have no right over to cry and only do it because they don’t know how to handle the situation.

i also think her being „horny“ and them sleeping together wouldn’t be a good idea she would literally blame herself and i also think that’s to soon for them. i just don’t think he doesn’t deserve any praise or her going soft on him. he did the bare minimum and i hope she doesn’t settle for that when she’s way more worth.

I love how you want my OC to have a happy life🥺 the thing with overthinkers is that they dont know how to communicate, me being one, I know this. Regarding Jungkook and his crying? this is a new thing to them, and its just something they've never done before. OC has confidence issues, and jk cheating on her made her believe it more that it was her who was the problem.

Jungkook is crying because he hates himself for what he did to OC, He cries because he caused that. He cries not because he wants to be the victim but because this is something he doesn't know if he could fix or not. They both love each other, but Jungkook has always made sure OC knows that she can leave him if she feels like it.

He is trying to make things better. Jungkook walking on eggshells and crying might seem like he's overdoing it and playing victim but ig us seeing it that way is because people who cheat are not genrally trying to make things better, so this seems unfamiliar. This is just my opinion.

Jungkook not telling OC about his decision is described in chapter 4.1, but if you did read it, I would just like to say that when someone doesnt know how to live normally after this kind of situation, he is also doing things that might work sometimes and might also fuck things up sometimes.

OC is not the common way of horny, she is the type of horny where she doesnt think its right to give in, wants to give in, cant co trol her own body because hormones, she just needs the comfort of her husband but thinks that her past self deserves better, but what about her future self? Present? It's just so complicated for her. So yeah, she is not the common way of horny. it's different, difficult.

This is a situation neither our OC nor Jungkook ever imagined they would be in, so they're doing progress together, and sometimes they both make mistakes. They're human and not calling cheating a mistake, but if they want to fix their relationship, they should understand at some point that communication is important.

Being vulnerable is not a weakness sometimes, it might strengthen their relationship. Every person deserves a happy ending, but maybe everyone's happy ending has their own definition.

Thank you for reading my story, and I ho estly love it when people tell me their thoughts about how they felt while reading the chapter. It makes the writer in me happy to know that I can make people feel things through my stories.

[baltears]

starting to realize that one reason not everyone reads you the same way and some people think it's a dramatically dumber show than it is is bc not everyone is aware of how precise the writers were in creating joe's pathology and the amount of verisimilitude in the writing around his extreme trauma and the resultant extreme behaviors.

joe acts the way that he does because part of him (the inner child) sincerely, very deeply craves love and connection, but bc he grew up in an extremely high stakes survival situation – & never really experienced a life away from his multiple sources of simultaneous extreme threat* and longed-for crumbs of affection & validation & emotional comfort before reaching adulthood – he quite literally cannot help recreating that same completely insane level of high stakes in his own life because that is still how his nervous system is wired. he is too internally fragile to feel like he can withstand true inner scrutiny, the type required for deep recovery from trauma. this part is also hard to explain to people who dont have this type of trauma, there's this very pervasive terror that certain things will just somehow annihilate you and swallow you up, such as looking too closely at your feelings, or someone else seeing who you are deep down and rejecting you.

so when joe fixates on someone he has fantasized will save him,** he feels the need to stalk and gather information in order to craft this perfect, completely fabricated self that he knows will not be rejected the way he thinks his real self automatically would be, bc deep level rejection also = annihilation. and because his mom (and i'm not trying to be harsh here, she is also a victim and a survivor, just being real) failed in her handling of the situation with his dad and further failed in her handling of joe killing him, child joe forms this impression in his brain and nervous system that "situations that i am involved in can unpredictably escalate to extreme violence", and "extreme threat to my feelings/emotional self also goes along with extreme threat to my physical body and life". this impression never changes. he never unlearned this. so what he ends up doing is unconsciously creating circumstances where this will happen because it is familiar &he never really learned how to function in situations where the threat level is "normal". when he gets rejected or the threat of abandonment comes up or anything else goes wrong, he immediately internally escalates to maximum threat response and is prepared to resort to extreme violence in order to 'protect' himself and/or a woman or a child. i just feel it's worth noting that the vast majority of human interactions do not and would not escalate unpredictably to extreme violence, and the reason it keeps happening around joe is because he (again, unconsciously- this is a nervous system level response) either creates it himself or seeks out environments where this level of dysfunction is the norm. btw the patriarchal obsession with protecting women comes from a combination of misogyny + a deep mostly unconscious need to justify killing his dad to protect his mom because his entire self worth hinges on whether that would make him a bad person who deserves to die.***

he manipulates others as a survival tactic by mirroring them and saying what he can usually tell they want to hear, but actually does it so constantly and compulsively that it becomes maladaptive and frequently hurts the social impression he gives (how many times did other characters call him out for being a weird phony?). he compulsively narrativizes himself and his life in bizarre, binaristic, fictional trope-based ways because he coped so hard with books when he was locked in a cage as a kid & had to tell himself stories about what was going on around him and what it meant in order to feel like his existence could withstand his circumstances. i could go on. my point is that i think joe is in a lot of ways actually a very accurate intelligently written and sensitive portrayal of a cptsd victim. like frankly i personally just don't want to have the conversation anymore about whether we're allowed to relate to joe because he does the memey relatable narrator thing and is a white man, those things are not why i find him relatable. yes the "commentary on protagonist status being automatically applied to white men", "commentary on patriarchal norms and how women are de-voiced / objectified and treated as disposable", the genre deconstruction stuff, the topical stuff, the memey stuff, are all vital parts of the show as well and deliver some extremely cogent points and an entertaining viewing experience but what im getting at is this cake has layers. love is also an amazingly written character for very similar reasons and i love all the pov stuff with her in season 3. ok signing off now

*in the case of neglect and abandonment from his mom, which has life or death level stakes for a child, and physical abuse and extreme psychological terrorism from mooney

**i want to briefly draw attention here to the fact that healing fantasies are a vital survival tactic for kids in traumatizing situations, although they can become maladaptive into adulthood – there is a misogynistic flavor to joe's because he is a misogynist deep down, but my point is that the healing fantasy is used to avoid total despair/annihilation in the midst of the extreme pain of trauma. most of the other traumatized characters in the show also display signs of coping with a healing fantasy, and the reason joe is so good at manipulating fellow traumatized people is because he recognizes on an unconscious level how to create the image of a healing fantasy that they will be vulnerable to.

***so, again, life or death level emotional need to uphold this belief system, as we saw in s4 when he hit a point of no longer being able to justify any of his behaviors and very rapidly reached a decision to attempt suicide.

[yomiurinikei]

You know which character I want to send for meme but yeah it is obvious can I get Kinji in that meme template?

ah yes, so obvious, we all know ur favorite character is kinji hakar1 (dont wanna invade tags akdsjksd), who everyone associates u with, and totally isn't just the first fictional kinji that popped up when i googled the name.

my identity hc for them

GAY gay homosexual gay. sorry kiyoka calling him out just. i cant view him as anything else. i do think there's canonical backing for this, not specifically him being exclusively into guys, but for him liking guys in general, i think its canon supported. i also Just Like it.

i think he's like. amab, but i think he just doesnt really Get It/feel any particular way- he's comfortable with how he presents and is perceived the way he is, and doesn't really feel a desire to change! he's content, and i don't think he'd be any happier if he changed how he performs gender. and seeing as i want this boy to do some soul searching and examine his relationship with faith, ill let him have a constant in his life. just this once

Thoughts on their home life/family

aaaaa.... i think like. mentioned this in the hcs i wrote for him recently, but i think his dad (the bishop) was a genuinely good person, and a good dad! i just think like..... it would've been cool if after being adopted and coming to italy, he had more than one role model and like. god. i dunno i think that mayyyybe having the person who chose him, who chose to take care of him, be a well-respected bishop who wound up living a secular life and etc etc mightve maybe impacted kinjis path in life. i don't think he was forced into anything, but i do wonder the degree to which kinjis faith started as a way of feeling connected to his dad and feeling that he was part of a community.

anyways though. i think he was a happy child, well cared for, etc. but i feel like maybe someone should have forced him to go outside and make friends, or stopped to question why he might be throwing himself into religious studies so much, or, after all that. maybe. i dont know. NOT SENT HIM TO JAPAN BY HIMSELF AS A MIDDLE SCHOOLER? ??????

its kinda a miracle hes as stable as he is. and while i don't think he's... literally traumatized, i feel like there was some side effects of his childhood past "oh he doesn't Understand friends". honestly a vv interesting example of how childhood and environment shapes people.

anyways though. i wouldn't be surprised if his focus on orphanages/caring for kids stemmed from him being a like... pre-teen/younger, and his brain just naturally orienting towards "wanna be with peers, wanna play, wanna form social bonds", but he had already placed himself in the role of an adult, and so he took on the same place as the priests he was trying to emulate. its kinda silly why did literally everyone go like. well if everyone else is treating him as an adult i guess i will too... kinji is the poster child for "was called mature as a kid"

How i feel about their canonical writing/handling

mmm... its objectively Good. i just feel like.... kinji kinda falls into the issue of so many characters to explore, so little time? like. we don't really get to see a whole lot of the depth that i see (linuj may not get him the way i do), and it makes sense, but it still kinda sucks... it'd be nice if he survived and made it to the end (and then held hands with tsurugi i mean-) buuut. i understand why he didn't. :(

tho one thing i wanna note is. linuj originally intended for his ch3 meltdown to be his true personality of sorts. and was gonna have his motivation just be that he liked murder. and he acknowledges that how he acts in ch3 isn't kinjis normal personality, and that he likes having a actual motive better than his old plan for kinji. but i feeeel like linujs old plan kinda pokes through at times with how kinji is handled? specifically like.. tsurugis response of "woah i didnt know a priest would act like that"- tbf, that does reflect on tsurugis black and white thinking and how he struggles to remedy his values. but also it just kinda feels like linuj is still treating it as a shock value twist that kinji is Just Like That, despite textually saying otherwise. that kinda sucks

The one thing i’d want to make canon about them

im not fucking joking im trying to think of something else. i would like canon gay kinji. again we have NO TIME FOR THIS. but if he had survived, i think that could be something nice to write in + subtextually show. i wont ask for the complete and utter tone shifts that would have to happen for more than subtext to be real. but. i think it'd be a good thing to do w/kinji if he had more time with us.

also i think it'd be neat to hear more about kinjis bio parents, just because im curious? but ya know. i kinda dont trust linuj and can just be weird about why he still uses uehara as his family name in my head, and have that be canon to me, instead of having to ignore linuj, so.. im content

My number one favorite ship for them

tsuhara. nobody look at me.... i promise i will post my thoughts on them one day. currently im trying to handle all myyy.. non-spring quarter graduation requirements (aka, some stuff my hs wants me to get done other than the classes im taking this quarter), so thats kinda my goal for april. and then may will have midterms and then ill be working on finals ughhhh... so im not really dedicating time to it. but its like... the only canon sdra fan content im working on rn? its. its in the works and its on my schedule and it wont take long. its just a matter of when i can get around to it, so i wanna explain why im not prioritizing it akjdjskjdjsdk.

anyways. im so not normal about them and ive been not normal about them for the past ninety three years. my beloved boys with their moral beliefs and their systems of justifying their actions and and and. aaaaaa.....

…Now everyone else i ship with them

uhhhhhhm. i think his ftes were cute? hm. i think there's stuff i objectively like, like... i think it'd be nice for him and would be cute. but there's nothing im really Passionate about/see myself spinning around in my head. for ex like.. i go out of my way to think about tsuhara. theyre just in my brain sometimes. but whereas like... i was uekoba posting a few days back- that was vv nice and fun! but i wouldnt have really talked about my thoughts on kinji and haru if it wasn't for outside prompting, if that makes sense.

u all will never escape my tsuhara posting. kinji canonically got tsurugi to change both in and out of the killing game. he is the one who looked at tsurugi and did not think "oh i can fix him" but simply by existing!! fixed him!!!! aaaaa!!!!! aaaaa.

The thing i will NEVER ship

hm. hmmm. i think ive chatted about them before. ive indulged. but im honestly not a huge fan of kakeru/kinji/kanata? it feels v much so to me like.. just pairing off whoevers there. i could get behind kakeru/kinji if i saw a good argument for it. i think they could be fun i a "everything goes wrong" (aka, every murder plot fails) au, but like. yeah. and then with kanata and kinji. i just dont see the vision

also i did not want to say it. but uehiga because i dont. get. it..... this delves more into mitch's writing and i dont want to talk about him on kinjis ask. but i do not understand it. it feels to me just like when people were shipping mitch and haru but repackaged. im never going to see the vision of mitch getting fixed by his having a crush on one of his male classmates.

a dynamic/relationship i wish was explored more (in canon, or in fandom)

kinda stems from beta. but i think he and mikako could be fun. spiritual buddies!!!! it could be a nice learning experience for them both. also maybe the gamblers ornament crew? that could be fun thats a friendly group of people (and also utsuro is there too/j). i just want kinji to have friends man.

thoughts on their design (appearance-wise)

mmm.. something about it is off. i dont know. it could be the linework the silhouette i dont. knowww? it just. feels blocky or bulky or something. its plain but it works for a priest and it makes sense. i like his hair color and eye color and etc etc theres just Something about his design that feels off to me if i look at it for too long

also. i dont think this is a issue anymore? but he wears a stole. thats what he's wearing. its not a scarf. (also. i still want to tie it into a bow.)

A music-related thought- a song that reminds me of them, or what their music taste is, etc

not even gonna lie i thought i had some sort of song on one of my spotify playlists that would work. wtf.

hmmmm. mercy, by sir chloe, kinda gives me like. kinji ch3 vibes. not really though why is this so evil. every song i see just winds up making me think of a different character.

okay. ive just been sitting down working on this post since i posted the rei one tbh. so. i think that no matter where u hc kinji ends up after evaluating his relationship with faith (personally i think his beliefs stay the same, he never really looses her faith, moreso what changes is his relationship with the church), he likes hearing hymns. i think harmonies and 'pretty' voices is just something he'll always appreciate in music.

[florallychaotic]

The 100 Live Blogging

Alright yall, I'm gonna take a dive back into the only show aimed at teens that I watched as a teen. Everyone had their one CW show and this was mine. Separate posts will be made for separate watching sessions but episodes done in the same watching session will be added as reblogs. Block the tag "alli watches the 100" if you don't want this on your dash (no shame to ya)

Episode 1x01 Pilot

We are off to a bad start Netflix started playing suits when I opened it for some fucking reason

Right off the bat, Eliza Taylor's American accent isn't bad at all, but it's got the American vocal fry that I hate

Also it's really funny to me that the lead actors of this show have names that are near identical to people who are way more famous than them (Eliza Taylor and Bob Morely)

Not a good sign that the UK part of the Ark, the spaceship these people are staying post apocalypse, looks like it has cardboard on the exterior

Juvenile offenders call lockup "the sky box" which is was teenagers are never in charge of naming things

CW dialogue exposition my beloathed

Wells got himself arrested not for Clarke, but in my headcannon, that The 99 isn't as good of a title

My only solace for having to deal with Finn is that unlike the first time I watched this show, I know he dies instead of just wishing for it

Ah season one Bellamy hair, it makes him look like a middle school teacher

You see I hate CW dialogue but I also absolutely would have screamed "We're back bitches" if I was the first person back on earth in a century

Cue too on the nose pop song, radioactive by imagine dragons

I swear to god a solid 20% of Finn's dialogue is calling Clarke princess and im supposed to like him?

I will say off the bat Bellamy is the best character because so far he's the least clichéd and most interesting lol. Meanwhile I can't wait for his sister Octavia to be a good character because she does, she does get better but for now....yikes

Monty!!! Monty best boy!!!

FUCKED UP DEER MY BELOVED!!! TWO HEADED DEER WOOHOO!!!

I dont know how to explain it, everything on the Ark...like it doesn't look greenscreened but it does look weirdly hazy like it's not there??

The actor for Kane has a very bad American accent, it's so far up his nose it's like he's sick lol

Love the random girl who yelled "It's water!!!" When it started raining

Begging this society to stop using the term "floated" for executed it sounds so fucking stupid

Kane absolutely said the word "majority" instead of "maturity" and that's the take they used for some reason

Clarke is a beautiful artist and normally I don't wanna be the person to question this but how does she know what the Arc du Triumph is

Kane please don't say you're willing to "take us down to a cosmic Adam and Eve" to your female co-worker clearly both you and the writers don't realize how extra creepy that it

This show really likes shot to shot scenes where the camera is just panned up a little so you can see up the actor's nose and it's so awkward

I dont want to be that person, but I think it's very telling that Abby (Clarke's mother)'s best friend is an Asian woman who is still unnamed despite having more lines than multiple white characters who are already named. Like this show is quite diverse and it's not going to be fun rewatching and seeing how poorly they handled that diversity.

Director: "okay can you boys just improv for a moment to delay the scene so we can have the big moment at the chorus of the song?" Actors: "Sure boss!"

What!?!?! You're not alone on Earth?!?! I never would have seen that coming! /s

Final rating: 7/10 despite its flaws I'm far too interested to not continue. What shot Jasper?? Idk! It's a fun lord of the flies story that is really interesting if only its dialogue was better

[liloinkoink]

i love your writing agh. ive always wondered what your process is- like, on starting to write a fic, do you set up notes for the universe or the scene or do you just write jump in and build on the first draft? i just think that stuff is interesting to talk about

ooh thanks for asking! it's a really fun question i would be happy to answer. i will say, there's really two main ways i approach writing, so i'll tell you about both. im going ot mostly use lamplight pieces as an example since lamplight is on my mind, but feel free to ask me abt other fic as well

.....im gonna readmore this bc otherwise itll be long, but the tl;dr of my process is a focus on the question "what's the point?"

so, point. usually when i write something, i try to have an outline, but i rarely stick to them exactly. take 20 questions from lamplight (picked bc its like, 500 words, so if you dont know it its a quick read). i didnt make an outline for this one bc it's so short, but if i did, id have probably said something like...

ren and martyn traveling sometime in the middle of the plot. introduce the way they communicate--lighting up for yes/happiness, dimming for no/displeasure. make it clear the fire is ren despite the fact martyn isn't using his name, include the fact ren is a god (but martyn is still martyn about this), include martyn's armor being enchanted by ren

what im doing with this outline is three things. one, the literal plot. two, the details i think are most important to include, three (and most vitally) the purpose of the scene.

as i said, to me, the most important question in planning writing (or in writing in general) is "what's the point?"

20 questions had a lot of different driving points, since i was trying to introduce basically the entire concept of the au in a short amount of words. ren's mode of communication, status as a god, and allusions to his powers, plus his relationship to martyn, their general situation... when i opened notes to write 20 questions, i asked "why am i telling you this? what's the point of writing this?" and the answer was "introduce lamplight," so that's what this fic was.

in most of my oneshots, the point is usually some emotion im trying to evoke or an analytical idea i want to share. the points are, honestly, usually what i start with when planning these. theyre me going i need you to understand this, so how am i going to tell it to you? the point of the rhythm of cold fists for example is that i think scar threw the finale fight, so i was trying to examine what would have lead him to make that decision.

(this is the oneshot i thought was quickest to explain the point of, originally i picked a different one and this paragraph was MUCH longer)

in longer stuff i usually keep notes like.... an upcoming lamplight piece (if you dont mind spoilers) im considering is this

first few days of traveling, before the inn scene and ren is in a lanter. martyn accidentally drops ren into water/a river. establish ren's fire cant be put out + ren and martyn have a more comfortable relationship than normal paladins and gods (cuz other paladins would Not get away with this). martyn's trying to decide if he's fine with following ren and being able to laugh this off is how he does that

so ive asked myself: whats the point of this scene? well, martyn is trying to figure out if he likes ren or not in the first week of meeting him, or if swearing himself to ren in a moment of desperation was equal to / worse than the place they were escaping. he cant talk to ren and find out ren's a decent guy, so hes going to have to find out through an accidental test of ren's character: royally fucking up as a paladin and seeing how the god hes following handles it. its also establishing a worldbuilding detail (ren cant be put out) on top of defining their relationship. lots of points being made here in both this specific instance and the world/plot at large

for all this ive said abt lamplight and outlines... none of lamplight until this week has had outlines. ive been mostly just jumping into my third life fic with no plan, driven literally EXCLUSIVELY by asking "what is the point?" and a desperate need to answer it

often with unoutlined pieces, this is paired with a specific visual i want to achieve. the tavern piece was more visual than point driven, and the visual was... actually the idea of embers in the burning building surrounding martyn like fireflies. i abandoned that visual for the idea of ren materializing in the flame, however, bc once i thought of that it became the driving visual i needed to see realized instead

i actually abandon details like that a lot in my writing. ill plot a scene based on 10 details and 2 points, and ill change 9 of those details because i found different ones while the points don't really budge. honestly, i hardly even look at my outlines when im actively writing--ill reference them when i start a new scene, but theyre really more for organizing my thoughts into clear points. my missing or obstructed outline doesnt look anything at all like what ive written, but the points of the story are all in-tact.

...this is long enough as is so i wont talk abt my thoughts on first drafts and editing them, but i do have them. i hope this was interesting to you, bc i had a lot of fun thinking about it!

[gotenandtrunkz]

Concept: a dragon ball fanfiction that is totally antagonist-driven and plot heavy and long and well-written and enthralling and, like, it really seems like the author knows what theyre doing and everything has a place. 

But in all of this theres also ample time for domestic stuff bc it’s a slow-build, or bc not all characters are involved at all times . And it takes place during a time where trunks is a teenager and he has braces for his shitty teeth. and as a reader youre like LOL. Wonfder why they chose to give him braces. But you dont really think abt it much.

But then also theres this subplot in which goten and trunks have been hanging out lately , playing video games, going to the skatepark, etc and youre like Oh thats sweet . Anyway let’s see where the main plot goes.

But then that subplot doesnt leave and FOR SEEMINGLY NO REASON what happens is that goten keeps trying to get trunks to eat gummy worms bc he knows it’s bad for his braces + and thats all cute and funny to see them bicker + but then goten just seems starngely transfixed on this bizarre idea of there being METAL in his MOUTH and this culminates into him eventually getting trunks to let him lick the candy out of his braces.

and again THIS IS A WELL-THOUGHT OUT STORY .. everything has a place .. everything feels thematically relevant in regards to itself AND the source material .. so WHY does trunks have braces WHY are they eating name-brand gummy worms? Like the author made that up. Why.

and it just gets weird like we can see how goten is having a hard time understanding this metal mouth situation and he doesnt like it and is vexed abt it but it also disgustingly intrigued and haunted by it .... Everyonbe keeps trying to explain to him the purpsoe of braces but hes just inconsolable. Hes like “It Just Aint Right. It’s not natural.” and Gohan tries to explain “Well see it’s like how i wear glasses, i cant see so well so theres glass on my face! But thats not that strange to you, is it?” but goten cuts him off and is just like IT’S NOT THE SAME THING.....

Anyway. We also see how Trunks handles this. And we see how sick he thinks it is that goten keeps doing this to him and at the same time we see the wordless, desperate fervor he exhibits where he sneaks down to the party store to buy more gummy worms with cash, how when the cashier lightheartedly says “hey kid, you know gummy things arent good for your braces, right?” trunks barely emotes and just hands him the money, we see how whenever he knows goten is coming over he plants these bags of candy where he thinks goten will see them just to put the idea in his head . We see how when they hang out it’s totally normal and comfortable until goten ntoices smth on the counter yonder and goes “woah. woaaah. Are those gummy worms? WOAH. Well. Dont mind if i do..” and then it’s like a ball drops and the evening is not the same as trunks just waits for the inevitable when goten is like “Hey you can have some too i wont tell your orthodontist..” and then tries to feed him these damn worms.

and trunks is saving face so well and exhibiting disapproval at the prospect of goten stick his tongue in his mouth but also he deosnt fight back THAT hard . Like his disapproval is genuine but so is the way that he wills himself to turn the other cheek.  And every time Goten leaves Trunks is in the bathroom scubbing his teeth and picking his braces clean and just trying to fucking breathe and not vomit. The thrill and the disgust are interchangeable. 

AND AGAIN. This is a perfeclty conventional and engaging dragon ball fanficiton. YOPU CANT FIGURE OUT WHY THIS IS HAPPENING?

And either you never get an answer OR you finally find out at the very end WHY this has been happening. It’s so when at the crux of the villainry, they refuse to form gotenks, thus giving the plot the proper dire kick it needs. 

Like things got TOO uncomfortable between them like their subplot get its climax in which Goten is like "WAIT WAIT WAIT. They put METAL in your MOUTH so that your TEETH will MOVE?" And he already knew that but hes just realizing it in full context again. And Trunks doesnt know what the fuck hes supposed to do about the desperate fervor that lives in his chest and makes him hide gummy worms in his room for Goten to find. And maybe this does just culminate into them making out and it's WEIRD becasue it's not like theres anythinf between them but platonic comfort and fearful disgust. And they do this and Goten deosnt even care about it becasue without the sweet tang of gummy worm flesh and the tart effect of the sour dust it's sort of underwhelming. Like the metal and teeth thing is still fucked but again it's underwhelming like hes done this before but with candy and so this is just underwhelming. And they do this until they stop and then Goten goes home ... ?

And so later, in the climax of the main plot, theres a situation where they REALLY need another strong fighter. And they're sort of getting their shit kicked in. And Bulma is hiding amongst the wreckage and her son flies down to see if shes ok and shes like “IM FINE BUT YOU NEED TO GET YOUR ASS OUT THERE.. WASNT GOTEN JUST WITH YOU? GO MERGE WITH HIM OR SOMETHING!” and trunks is just like Um. Well. About that. I dont really think that’s neccessary .....

and like the stakes are so high right now but theres this pocket of comic relief where we have time for Goten to stand there with his hands in his pockets kicking rocks around and for Trunks to be like "Hey. So. My mom says we have to fuse.." and for Goten to go "Yeah. No. I dont really wanna do that...."

And you cant really say no to Bulma so they try to fuse but they dont really do it bc they keep being like "hold on my postures off" "uh I think your ki's off" etc etc and it's becasue they're kind of nervous and completely uncomfortable for obvious reasons. And Bulma just cant fucking believe what shes seeing right now.

And so. The justification for that whole sub-arch is that so at the end, Goten and Trunks arent available to form Gotenks. Ok. Sure. Everything has a place. The ends justify the means.

...BUT DO THEY???? DO the end justify the means??? ISNT THERE ANY ROOM FOR COMMENT ON THE MEANS THAT WERE CHOSEN... SURELY there are a MILLION other ways to get to that same functional end. SO WHY??? WHY??

Again to reiterate this is a great and good fanficiton. A right proper read. It feels in chatacter and relevant. SO WHY ... DID THAT HAPPEN .!!

Thanks for reading. Love you

[dmc-tings]

The Lord's with an S/O (who just found out about their powers)

Alcina Dimitrescu

Noice 👌🏾

But what did you do for this woman to spare you?

She's like... the biggest man hater anywhere

So... if your a guy, you are lucky boi (or if you identify as a guy)

Or perhaps your a lucky lady?

I feel like she won't discriminate if she feels like your important to her

But for whatever reason she CHOSE YOU

So take that as a win

Sure, she's a vampire and has to eat people

Which was something you didn't know

But she doesn't eat in front of you

Even lying to the point of telling you she's drinking wine

You get curious, of course

So when she leaves to "take care of business", you look onto her glass or cup

You see red

"Ok... but it dont smell like wine..."

You take a sip, only to spit it out right away

Retching with disgust, you tasted blood

Your not an idiot, at least not fully anyways

Alcina rushed back, hearing you gag, thinking one of her daughters were bothering you

Only to see the sight in front of her

You looked at her in fear

Which hurt the tall woman's non beating (?) heart

You backed into a corner, thinking the worst

Looking for a makeshift weapon, you grabbed a spoon

To which made the Lady shake her head

"Love, you know I wouldn't-"

"Your a damned liar!!" You barked weakly, "W-what the fuck are you!?"

She sat calmly in the chair in front of you, gesturing for you to take a seat as well

You hesitated, but did comply, not letting go of your weapon (the spoon)

She huffed sadly, normally this behavior would have sent her into a rageful fit

But this is YOU we're talking about

Her little muse, the only mortal that makes her truly happy

"My Love, please calm down."

When you showed no sign of relaxing, Alcina took her glass in her hand, swirling the blood

Then takes a small sip, and lighting a cigarette

She offers you one

You cringe, and with that she pulls back again

After taking a puff, she begins to explain

Mother Miranda, the other Lord's, the creation of her daughter's, the Village, and everything else, prior to your showing up

After she finishes, you lower your loyal spoon

Drinking in all of the information

You looked up at her

"So that's why your so keen in keeping the girls away from me..."

The large woman nodded, looking at you

You bit your lip, but let go of your spoon, placing it back into the table

Alcina looked at you, watching you relax

You nodded a calm understanding

"Well seeing as I know what's going on now... is Mother Miranda going to-"

The Lady Dimitrescu, shook her head

"She has allowed for me to keep you. As long as you only stay in the castle... seeing as that the village is too dangerous. And I don't want you mixed up with the rif-raf."

You smiled and sat in her lap, (cause you can do that) and planted a kiss on her cold cheek

She let out a pleased humm, and returned the kiss

"Just... next time, if you choose a weapon, Love, make sure it has a SHARP end."

Salvatore Moreau

You had known Moreau since before Mother Miranda made an impact on his life

You saw less and less of your significant other

He would disappear and cut your alone time short, whenever the woman called

You were saddened when he finally told you that you couldn't see him anymore

But that's didn't stop him from speaking to you through whatever door, that separated you both

He didn't keep you locked up, but he would lock whatever door was between you

So you couldn't see the monstrous transformation, causing him pain

All you knew is that his voice was becoming more and more disgruntled

As said, you knew Salvatore before this

He was a handsome and intelligent man (despite what's written in Miranda's notes)

And to hear your man become... so in thralled by this other woman, made you suspicious

One day, you both were speaking, with a door between you, as usual

Unbeknownst to Salvatore, you were picking the lock

Eagar to see him

He never noticed the change in your tone, when you got it unlocked, nor the click of the lock

Shoving the door open, and pushing Salvatore back

The male let out a yelp, trying to rush in to the nearby darkness

You stepped through the threshold, eyes blazing and searching

You scanned the room and finally landed on a heap of a shivering... beast?

"Moreau? Is... is that you?" You crept closer, and gently put a hand on his back

"D-dont look at m-me...." he shivered, trying to hide himself

Horrified, you took his face on your hands

"I-is this... the work o-of-"

He cut you off, "Do-dont. Mother loves me... she does... I know she does..."

You felt tears pour down your face

You couldn't bring yourself to speak

That vile woman, had destroyed your dear Moreau

The man you knew and loved was beaten and broken into this sobing heap before you

He looked at you, and reached up to wipe your tears

"Oh... please don't cry... thi-this is her will..."

You shook your head, "what kind of will is this, Salvatore? To turn you-"

He pulled away from you, snarling, "I KNEW YOU WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND!!! Mother loves me, and i-"

You slapped him, your tears stopping, "What kind of man have you become?!"

Disgusted, not with his appearance, but his sniveling attitude

You left

But... not unaffected by what happened to the man you cared about

You left... everything behind, the Village, your family...

Salvatore Moreau never left your thoughts and you never left his

It was a bittersweet life, but you were glad to leave what was happening behind

Angie and Donna Beneviento

These two kept you in their estate

Though Donna hid Angie from you, worried that you wouldn't understand the need for her doll

She also kept the pollen from her plants away from you

You were the first person Donna could talk to, without her illness bothering her

No need for Angie!? And this person don't care!?

Fucking Jackpot!!!

Though Angie does get a bit upset that she don't get to see you

That's about to change

You and Donna where sitting in the backroom, overlooking the waterfall

Enjoying an afternoon tea

"Dear? How are you feeling today?"

Donna looked at you, taking your hand in her's giving you a smile

"I am well." She reassured you, giving your hand a squeeze

Then you sneezed, surprised cause your allergies hadn't started up, due to the lack of pollen

And the abundance of snow and cold

Donna gasped, looking over her shoulder

"Angie, n-"

Angie revealed herself, giggling and plopping herself in your lap

You froze, "A-a doll? Donna... is this a gift?"

You never really liked or disliked dolls

Angie gave another giggle, "No, stupid! I'm Angie. Donna's most favorite doll. And a friend."

Your eyes widened at the living doll, "Uh... im-"

"I know who you are!!" She floated infront of you now

"And we like you!"

Donna was quiet, not surprisingly, but you reached out for her

She gently took your hand in her's

"Donna. Tell me whats going on. Please."

Donna nodded, quietly starting to explain.

The gifts from Mother Miranda, the plants, the pollen and finally Angie

You looked at the floating doll, who was nodding her head along, with Donna's words

Then finally, you pulled Donna closer to your side

"You don't ever have to hide things from me. I never had a problem with the other ways that you cope, Donna."

Your encouraging words sent the woman into tears of joy

She buried her face in your chest

You smiled at Angie, who patted you on the forehead

Karl Heisenberg

You sat in the smaller, (safer) part of his factory

It was a part he had built to keep you safe

From what?

You had asked Karl several times, on different occasions, what was he building

"Its none of your concern." He waved a hand dismissively, "Whats for dinner?"

You always had huffed out whatever meal you made for the pair of you

Karl was always one of three places: meeting his "family", in the factory, or right next to you

The "family" was always thrown into air quotes

You knew he disliked his "family"

He announced his leaving out again, not telling you where

But leaving nonetheless, as usual you waved him off

But today was different, you WERE going to see what the hell was in that factory

Not paying attention to the warnings he gave you, you made your way down

Once at an elevator, you pressed the button

It came up and you were met with a large, large portly man

"Why if it isn't Heisenberg's little kitten."

Shocked you jumped back a bit, but then inched your way inside

"Its alright. I mean you no harm. Come, come."

You stood next to him, "Uh... who are you?"

"You may call me The Duke." He hummed, "But what are you doing here? Don't you know it's dangerous to play here?"

You lifted your chin, "I can handle myself. Thank you."

The Duke gave a small laugh, as you pulled the switch, but didn't speak again

Hitting the bottom floor, you disembarked, waving goodbye

You noticed a door and pushed through

Only to be met with a metal drill nearly splitting your face in two

With a strangled yelp, you lept backwards

"HOLY SHIT!!! WHAT THE HELL-"

"Who's in my damned- KITTEN!?"

You heard Heisenberg's voice above you and looked around frantic

"Karl! What-"

You didn't get to finish, the same monster came at you again

Dodging to the side, only barely missing getting drilled

Running in to the labyrinth, you were soon cornered

You shook with fear, hearing more monsters come after you

Closing your eyes, waiting for the blows to take you to the Great beyond

Your waiting was cut shirt hearing a series of clang's

You moved your hands and opened your eyes

Seeing Karl, standing in front of you shoving all the monsters back...

But he wasn't touching them....

"What... how-"

"Dont just sit on your ass, get up!" He barked, grabbing your arm and pulling you behind him

Once back in the safe zone, you slapped him, breathing heavily

He took it, it was a well deserved slap

"E-explain yourself!"

He sat heavily down, telling you everything.

The reason for the factory, the monsters in it, his powers, Miranda's plan, even pouring out his emotions about it all

You finally understood and took his hands in yours, kneeling down infront of him

"You idiot. All you had to do was talk to me. Not be a "big tough guy" about it."

You kissed his rough hands

And he chuckled at you

"Always understanding. Thanks Kitten."