#he can't swim but i can
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*texting*
Regulus: do you ever wanna take your heart out and squeeze the emotionans away and then put it back in your chest so you'll feel less emoticons
James: ...
James: I'm coming over
#regulus is me#we only have one difference#he can't swim but i can#HA#marauders#jegulus#regulus black#james potter#james x regulus#reguous x jamss#starchaser#sunseeker
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Jonathan Crane, also known as: Creator of the World's Worst Exposure Therapy.
#this would be his title on a dating show#truly the man could change lives#too bad he likes ruining them instead#it reminds me of a crime show#i can't remember the name#where a therapist would try 'exposure therapy' with his patients#and then kill them under those pretenses#the scene of him tricking a man who couldn't swim#into drowning in a lake#kind of haunts me#but it also feels like something jon would do#shit can get dark#hi i'm rambling in the tags again#jonathan crane#scarecrow
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friendly reminder that frederick kreiburg canonically cannot swim
+ bonus art of him looking like a bitchass hater because i love his expression here:
#rambling#idv#identity v#frederick kreiburg#idv composer#idk if it's like. he can't swim#bc like people who can swim do very much still get into Situations where they need to be rescued#but i think it's funnier if he can't swim#also his tuning fork + mallet being his earrings in this design is such a cute n cool little detail god i love him#so tempted to just make an appreciation post of his + ganji's piercings in their skins / merch designs#not rn but maybe later
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Idk what I'm drawing lol
#for some reason I think geppie can't swim#he probably can tho#but this is an au anything could happen#honkai star rail#hsr#sampard#sampo x gepard#sampo koski#gepard landau#fanart#momochizu
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zomg... the girls! Sketched out! And a few characters I never showed designs for! haha! I keep thinking about the beach, so this is their swimwear.
I hope to make a full fledged drawing for all of them soon~ then the guys~~
Some newbies are: Aura (blue!) Katya (Gold!) and more of Verra (Green!) We'll eventually see more about them as I draw more things and doodles.
#Because I realized I never drew the girls as much as I did the guys#I used to exclusively draw women until I figured out how to draw men... I then awoke drawing nudethaniel and speedo vincent#so we're reeling it back a little#Ryoko Kui said she draws her oc's outfits in modern times to see how the different characters would dress. I thought about it- it definitel#says a lot about your character!#Monica is REALLY tall. And muscular! with a strong ability! no wonder she's taken down armies! She doesn't care to swim much but will use#a rashguard to swim in.#Sera is copying her style a bit but thankfully owns an actual wetsuit. Feels like home considering how her aerodynamic armor is designed#Sonia is sonia. She seductively asks Vincent to help her put sunscreen on... Only to be met with an albinoid man's journey to sun poisoning#He eventually gets greased in sunscreen and aloe vera after what feels like hours of nagging him. (it was forty five minutes.) Sorry Sonia.#Some things cannot be changed. When he did eventually look at her body he laughed at her ass being out rather than think anything naughty.#Not girl Summer. Vincent did end up helping her with the sunscreen though. “Lmao you can't do this yourself or something?” ruined the magic#Karin tailored her swimwear. She bedazzles her arms with accessories <3 Her nail polish can detect drugs <3 & cyanide caps in her earring <#Poor Katya is a supermodel but is way too thin... Strohl doesn't say it.. But he's worried. She makes way too much money to want to quit.#Verra is in rabbit mode because her summon LOVES to swim and hey who is she to halt its fun?#Aura is pretty modest and prefers to meditate in the water or by the shore away from all of the roughhousing. Nate and Strohl join at time#They kind of freak out when she starts floating though. Or invoking the elementals of the seas. The guys are both areligious. Awkward.#Especially when the waves start to get a little rowdy minutes later. Strohl is torn between considering religion and asking for a tutorial.#ark_systema
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i have not stopped thinking about roger a single day since finishing the dlc btw. godsend to all the inattentive adhd folks who struggle with independence and fine motor skills💥💥💥💥i just KNOW that man never learned how to tie his shoelaces. and when peter tried to teach him no matter how hard he tried he couldn't do it right (HE'S JUST LIKE ME FRRRRRRRRRR)
if he read warrior cats (he probably does). i definitely think alderheart would be his favorite
#headcanons#he also can't swim or properly ride a bike. because i can't do those things either and i love to project#and i Know making sandwiches has gotta be the most intimidating thing ever (and the most complicated food he can sorta make himself)#(buttering is HARD)#sorry the moment i find a character who's heavily adhd-i coded like him i have to give them All my issues#and he's by far been the easiest to do it with. Good job roger#this is what you get for showcasing executive dysfunction in MY presence!!!!!!!!#roger jones#dialtown
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Floaty boy can't swim, ocean boy to the rescue.
#dirkjohn#johndirk#john egbert#dirk strider#homestuck fanart#my art#why three different artstyles? yes#john can't swim but can breath underwater#which doesn't make his attempt to learn to do it like a regular human any more enjoyable#he's so used to floating he can't stand the feeling of his weight pulling him down#i guess?#and dirk just uses this as an excuse to hold him in some way#he's a compicated guy with simple wants and needs
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Astarion can't recall his own eye color but he remembers Sebastian
#bg3#bg3 spoilers#astarion#baldur's gate 3#what if i just died Larian hm? what if#can't remember his face - the color of his eyes - if he can swim#but he remembers a handsome shy man who had never been kissed#god I'm gonna throw up
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He deserves a bit of everything, as a treat (Patreon)
#Doodles#Wander Over Yonder#Commander Peepers#Up front - that first one was very inspired by one of Kurole's sketches of him - absolutely spectacular use of shapes ahhh <3 <3#His iris dripping directly into his tears?? Excuse me I die immediately#I did a full study later since as noted that one was from memory lol - not quite! Kurole's shapes are so pretty ♪#Peeps' shapes are some of the funnest to move around! He's so stretchy and squishy lol#He's so fun to pose#At first I was just going to doodle Peeps in the outfit the Watchdogs drew him in for The Cartoon because cute!#But I figured it'd be easier if started with the actual shapes they used - dissect how they lay on each other and all that#Turns out the bean form is also very cute hehe <3 They can try to make him as stereotypically dorky as they want! He's still the cutest!#He is quite handsome in the same outfit at his usual proportions tho#Not me always enjoying characters in glasses/putting characters in glasses#Of all the features I myself have that'd be the last one I would expect to be So about lol#Plus the little heels on his boots?? I can't believe the Watchdogs were Completely making a mockery of him hehe ♪#Maybe mocking him a little bit for being short but he loves heels! He loves feeling tall!#And they match his shirt? Fashionable all the way around ✨#Last one of him on Ziziks and trying(? maybe?? Lol maybe not) to relax#Open tourist-y shirt over loose swim trunks >>>#Gotta dork it up with the visor gloves and boots tho lol hopefully he put on sunscreen too#What would burnt Watchdog skin look like anyhow :0 Redder?#You just know he's still on call even if he managed to get some time off - and if he was forced off he's on call by choice lol#Little workaholic
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I feel like I'm going insane. I can't trust my brain at this point I keep seeing people talk about how Garrus said let's retire to the beach or draw them on the beach together I'm going legitimately insane where are you getting this. did he actually mention a beach and I completely missed it. Because like yeah headcanon what you want, it's cute, I don't mind, but it shows up even in meta analysis posts??? I'm slowly falling to madness did he ever say a word about a beach
#wild rambles#slow descent into madness#im seriously going insane he said somewhere tropical in their last conversation before the final battle#but i for the life of me can not recall any mention of sea or beach or anything like that#he does say turians can't swim also. but idk#AM I GOING CRAZY IS THIS CANON OR IS IT JUST SOME WEIRDLY POPULAR HEADCANON
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I'm rewatching Finding Dory, and Hank is honestly a miracle of animation
#Finding Dory#n0t seri0us#I had a dream about it last night that was like... a sequel to finding dory#humans had left the earth in ships that looked like the titanic on a big cushion of water#and I guess water had risen and fish were living among the abandoned cities#except the humans were also coming back and were a threat somehow? and the humans were also trying to reintroduce species#and make something like a zoo or nature reserve#it was all so stressful (thanks sertaline)#on a biology note I do enjoy the fact that when he's in water#Hank mainly crawls around instead of swimming#irl when octopuses swim their main heart stops beating so they can't swim for long before they have to stop#also Hank you bullshitter you would have definitely been able to fit in the pipes lmao#the only real 'hard' part of an octopus is the beak and potentially the eyes#so I thibk he would have been able to fit lol#also fun fact an octopuses can asphyxiate in it's own ink if it inks in an enclosed container (e.g. if they're being transported somewhere)#it's one of the reasons why they're so difficult to transport#on top of their amazing escape abilities#it's something I always think about when Hank inks in the kidzone pool lol#also during this rewatch I was like 'octopuses have a venomous bite. hank could potentially bite the kids.' (not recommended)#octopuses have two saliva glands#one is in the buccal mass - the sack that contains the beak & radula#the other is er.... behind it I think? closer to the eyes? If I recall correctly that's the one responsible for the venom#anyway back to the film & a big shout out to Hank because he is one of two octopuses that kickstarted my obsession with the#*them#the other was octodad lol
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Part 3 of the Gintama Flower Suite features Gintoki! I considered both the lotus and the cherry blossom for him. Ultimately I went with the lotus mostly because I have other plans for the cherry blossom. It might be weird to give this canonically sleazy and even sometimes stinky character this hallowed symbol of purity, but a major theme in Gintama is having him work as a purifier for many of the people he meets, paradoxical yet powerful. Such is the strength (or fate) of his silver soul.
#my art#gintoki sakata#sakata gintoki#gintama fanart#gintama flower suite#lotus flowers#gintama themes#plus i think it's symbolically hefty enough to carry him#hence why he can sit on its leaf without sinking#the fact that he can't swim just makes it even more appropriate if you ask me#gintoki keeps seeking out deep bodies of water#and somehow keeps surviving all the same when he shouldn't be able to#flower symbolism
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Imagine you have to set up yakumo's enclosure for the next couple months. How do you set it up and what do you put in there?
oh NO.! THE PROPPHECY HAS BEenm FUFILLED
i am standing in my room, leggies rooted to the floor. i am in shock .frozen and i have no idea how to proceed. there is a perpetual pathetically sobbing serpent under my blankie.
#stares at the camera and stage whispers#i can't be responsible for another living creature. i can't. or . er. i can. but I SHOULDN'T#i'll have to suppress every violent urge in my body to keep this thing alive for several months#i CANNOT fling him out the window. i WILL NOT grab his entire face and squeeze. I SHALL NOT chew on his tail.#now i'm reminded of that post where it's a pretty princess cage on the floor and comments go [that aint big enough for a dog]#and OP is all [it's not FOR a dog 😀]#yeah. that's me right now imagining a full grown yakumo in a cage by my bedside#SO FOR EASE OF MY IMAGINATION AND TO increase yaku's chance of surviving these next months#i'm going to try real hard to imagine him exclusively in pocket snake form (scrunches up my face in valiant effort)#his enclosure (crib?!?!) is flanked on all sides by eiden plushies#since yaku is an adult there is a smaller chance of him suffocating on eiden in his sleep. wait. actually#arranges the eiden walls to give some pockets of air. i don't trust him. he WILL suffocate on eiden given the opportunity#he gets one of those tiny dollhouse cooking sets for enrichment LOL#or i'll give him a bunch of those make-your-own gummy kits with elaborate setups and tiny egg gummies#crying yaku is the excuse i need to finally get a humidifier#i can survive not misting myself.. usually... but yaku will cry himself into dehydration. it's misting time#he gets an entire alcove closed off in the corner with his basic needs met. i cannot perceive#he can lurk in privacy as much as he wants. there are at least TWO hot rocks in there with garukaru's faces painted on em#there is a duplicate open-space alcove next to it for when he actually wants something from me LOL#is he a free range snake? can i take him to a bunch of restaurants and shove food into my sleeve for him? he wants to sample the delights..#tempted to put a bell on him just so if he gets loose in the basement i'll know to fish him out#but he's pretty cautious... he won't get into any fatal situations in the house right? ...does he know how to swim?!#at least one day is reserved for testing yaku's swimming capabilities.#he is going into the bathtub while it has a film of water. gonna test his traction. i hope i won't get panic-strangled#asks
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NAMI NEEDS TO GO UP THERE AND FIGHT BIG MOM I AM SO SERIOUS!!! THIS IS A BATTLE FOR THE ROMANCE DOWN TRIO!! SANJI DO NOT DARE TAKE HER SPOT!!!
#big mom just giving birth here on the battlefield.....#do i comment on the incestuous relationship between clouds made of the same soul??? no?? okay...#oh jesus.... goodbye kid and killer.... nami needs to get up there and take control of zeus and i am so serious#HER SKILL IS SO POWERFUL AND SO PERFECT FOR THIS FIGHT AGAINST BIG MOM BUT BECAUSE SHE IS NOT PART OF THE STRONG TRIO SHE GETS STUCK WITH#THE B LIST VILLAINS!!!! LKKE WHY DOES SHE NEED TO FIGHT ULTI?? OKAY THAT WAS MEANINGFUL BUT THAT COULD END THERE!!!!#SANJI GO FIGHT PAGE ONE!!! SOMEONE TAKE CARE OF ULTI AND LET LUFFY ZORO AND NAMI TAKE CARE OF KAIDO AND BIG MOM!!! I AM SERIOUS!!!#big mom is inside the castle.... maybe i will get my wish granted (kinda...)#kid and nami against big mom.... maybe sanji can join... i can see it so clearly.... come on now.....#if namo knew armor haki she would have gone up there and taken zeus and dealt with prometheus and his sister wife. let the others w/ big mom#fucking hawkins... end him killer.... calling him domesticated lmao... end his pathetic ass#using conqueror's haki on the weapons..... also zoro having it too.... the flower petals symbolism..... OHHHHHHHHH#nani indeed...... BREAK THAT MACE!!!! YEAAHHH!!!! law is completely baffled#KAIDO GOT SENT BACK!!!! LETSGOOOOO AND THE OG INTRO MUSIC QUICKS IN!!!! law just saw god again....#he said fuck off i got this.... omg.... he is either gonna nearly die and doesn't want them to follow or doesn't want to worry about them#while he fights and they try to defend him.... no other explaination (apart for 4 the plot reasons)#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 1028#luffy king of everything that was such a slay#they changed luffy chiquito's design....#i was gonna say luffy swimming...... but he can't yet akdhajsj#yasopp taking care of everyones children but his own...... i see how it is....#WHY WOULD SHANKS STAY IN GOA IF NOT TO TALK WITH GARP WHO LIVES THERE!!! I AM TELLING YOU SHANKS IS IN KAHOOTS WITH THE MARINES!!!!#i was thinking about shanks scar... and thought it might be from buggy with his three knives in between his fingers you know#but it is too small... like the knives would take more space.... but maybei might be reaching and it is from buggy and not like a little paw#or little hand.... however much distrubing you want to paint it....#shanks is testing little luffy's intelligence... he knows his weak spot already akdhjasj#uta calling herself a diva.... ajshaksn might this be the reason luffy was so inclined to having a musician since the start???#episode 1029#that was like a perfectly realistic relationship between an older smartass girl and a younger boy lmao it was spot on
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#my papa was diagnosed w lung and colon cancer. and he's too frail to do anything about it. so he's essentially just going to slowly die#they're not sure how long it'll take. or how advanced the cancer is. but it's there. and it will take him.#my grandma is also descending into bad dementia from her multiple traumatic brain injuries#it's gotten noticeably worse this past month#she needs to stop driving but I'm the only person in the family w a driver's license who can get to her#so if anyone was to pick up the slack it would be me.#aside from literally not having time nor money for that. I don't know how to handle this sort of grief#I'm 26 but I haven't come to terms w the fact that there is a quickly approaching day#where I'm going to wake up and my grandparents aren't going to be around any more#and I won't see them ever again.#I know I shouldn't borrow grief. but how do you avoid it.#and my granddad too.#and I can't really discuss this with anyone else. my siblings should be the ones that I could unpack this with#but bc of the age gaps between most of us they have an entirely different relationship with these people than I do#I remember everything. picking my granddad up from the airport. him giving me tootsie rolls. crying when we dropped him back off.#going fishing w my papa. bringing the fish back and watching my grandma gut and filet them. building a sandbox with him.#shelling pecans w my grandma. watching court tv while she made breakfast. her trying and failing to teach me how to swim.#it's not fair that I'm going to be the only person who remembers those things. and that to some degree I already am.
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but what if her aim is to just make as many money as possible, as quick as possible, and then sell the business, let someone else deal with the mess of it, and just retire with her rental properties and money from selling the business and/or those townhouses and
#like what's in it for her???#she's at retirement age#and also they're 'her' clients#so she can take as many with her when the business is sold#take the employees that she likes and offers them jobs to work from her dining table#i don't think trento girl or woolworths guy would accept that#the new admin girl might accept just because she's hungry for experience and doesn't have much of it#oh yeah tony#he'd be devastated if she sold the business#or she just finds a cheaper place closer to her house to run an accounting firm#maybe she doesn't need to sell#just move to a 'cheaper' place#but i told my mum that she pays about $4000 in rent per month and my mum said that's cheap#sigh#i don't know#can't wait for her to give me a termination letter tomorrow and it'll say 'she told me to retire'#I'VE MENTIONED IT ONLY HERE#IN THIS POST#write a fanfic about her retirement#she could go cruising every year#take alex#alex would love it there's so many pools and spas and he can make the boat go faster by#he teaches her to swim#'ok three things 1. breathe on both sides 2. use your elbows/shoulders not forearms (opposite of maxi) 3. extend arm when coming up for air#she's just like 'lmao three things should be 1. breathe 2. breathe. 3. don't sink to the bottom 4. breathe'#she can count she's a creative accountant#tumblr i'm sorry#it's not my fault blame her
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