#he WAS super creepy about the wilds & asking where she lived & said he wanted to bring the wilds back to reverie no matter the collateral

[artemissoteira]

i do love that knoll fully had no idea why dappled was killing him slfdhdskjfj. it wasn’t that someone discovered his plan to end sea travel and commit genocide, or uncovered that he was fae. it was that dappled just really hated his vibes because he wouldn’t stop building his train through her jungle.

he didn’t care at ALL about her jungle. he just wanted to do a capitalism through it and said he was jealous of her. and she super killed him about it

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

Asdfghjklmgf Ingo being literal uncanny valley for Laventon is so funny?? Meanwhile it doesn't even ping on Ingo's radar because somewhere in his subconscious he's used to seeing rabbits. Laventon falls back on ingrained politeness, but internally he's just going 'what the fuck what the fuck what the fUCK' every time they meet. The rest of the Galaxy Team eye his strained smile and carefully back away; they don't want to risk Laventon somehow getting the creepy murder eyes too. Again, Ingo does not really notice any of this as he stares blankly into space. There's something Wrong With That Rabbit...

Sneasler's just like, "Fuckin'. Bye, I guess." And then does her best to jog after him. Good thing she probably has a good sense of smell, otherwise she'd just straight up lose him until he finds his way back or she wanders across him just chilling as if nothing had happened. She frets over him for a bit or chides him for running off, but he doesn't like. Get It. He's fine now, so it's nothing to worry about. She stuffs him in the basket just so he can't run off again before she can really make sure he's alright and help get him sort of settled (as much as he's ever settled, that is. She probably has the best luck of soothing some of the panic though, once she's hidden him away in his tent where he feels safest). Which he thinks is overkill, but whatever. She'll let him out if he asks her to, so it's fine. (Everything's always fine, until it very suddenly it's not.)

I bet that's actually like, really worrying to Irida. She's probably the one who sees him most often aside from Melli, so to see him go from mostly normal for a jackrabbit to even more thin and scruffy with wild eyes  and heavy breathing is, uh, very concerning. Sneasler tries to supply her warden with food, but stressed and scared rabbits will sometimes lose their appetites and I assume hares are the same. So even more stressors for his body, and just another reason for any brain fog he might experience. He never stops being functional enough to do his job, but he sometimes toes the line. Being a perpetually stressed out prey animal is hard! Emmet is gonna riot the next time he sees him. 

Part of being too thin is often that you have a hard time thermoregulating, so that super would not help any issues he had with it because of his ears, especially when it's a very sudden change. The humidity of both those places would be killer on him too, because going from dry to humid, even if you're from a Hot dry place, is the absolute worst. It feels sticky and like you're living and breathing in soup, it's terrible. Cabala probably has issues with the change now at her age too, but in the opposite direction because she lives predominantly in the Mirelands, and her joints probably haaate the cold.  

Peacocks actually use their tails to intimidate too, that's why the spots look like big eyes, so Melli probably doesn't get confused, but other people sure would. It's a joke in the Diamond Clan that people will see them together and be like, "um? Is this really the time?" all awkwardly and then proceed to think they're dating, which Melli finds hilarious and Adaman does not. He's trying to look like a very serious leader here!

How would a seal anthro work? Like a mermaid?? Though, Iscan is so skittish that I'm kind of leaning towards a small prey animal, like a water shrew or water opossum. Oof though at Palina taking it even harder that her noble was lost at sea, because here she's a very strong swimmer.

Wait okay, who do we have for wardens so far?

Ingo, jackrabbit

Melli, peacock

Lian, marmot

Mai, domestic cat

Cabala, goat

Arezu, ???

Palina, otter

Iscan, ???

Gaeric, polar bear

Sabi, penguin?

And we have Adaman, but not Irida. 

Other prominent characters are:

Protagonist and counterpart, domestic cats

Laventon, domestic rabbit

Cyllene, mountain lion

Kamado, grey wolf

Volo, dove

Am I missing anyone?

arezu i think we said poodle? not sure if that was ever like 100% nailed down though. but i like that, or some other dog breed with a lot of hair for haircut reasons. irida we haven't said, but maybe she could be an arctic fox? but now i'm not sure about mai being a housecat either, since the protagonists are housecats and it feels a little weird to have them both be. what if she's another lizard like adaman? maybe she's a blue-spotted tree monitor. also: cogita as a mourning dove, maybe.

ooh i like water shrew for iscan. and then yeah, palina could have easily swam herself and growlithe to safety, but she wasn't strong enough to pull lord arcanine too, and in refusing to leave him she almost drowned all three of them, before iscan pulled her out.

irida's having such a hard time rip. she cares so much about ingo, he's been such a blessing to the clan, but she just doesn't know how to help him. she doesn't know what he needs, and anything she does just seems to create new problems, and just asking doesn't work because he won't even acknowledge anything's wrong. every time she sees him he looks worse and he doesn't even notice. sneasler sure does, though, and is Not Happy about it.

...would melli notice? and do something about it? i mean he might not care that much about ingo himself (and if he does he probably wouldn't admit it lol) but sneasler's a noble and if ingo's not doing his job well it would probably fall on melli to take over. which he would hate and be furious about, so ingo you BETTER get your act together. shame on you, giving him MORE WORK. at the very least sneasler probably knows that in worst-case scenario she can drag him over to moonview for actual Help. (since it's not like she can bring him to calaba without him getting fucking heatstroke)

emmet's probably got some stress problems too, back in unova (+ his hare instincts are also dealing with the sudden failure of the Buddy System), but it's definitely waaay better than what ingo's dealing with. he's gonna be SO mad, not like, at anyone specifically, but just generally at the universe for letting this happen.

[words-4u]

they don't know about us - j.'h'.s

pairing: jake 'hangman' seresin x reader

wc: 1.8k

a/n: i am so happy to see glen powell getting the recognition he deserves <333 also listen to 'they don't know about us' by 1d cause that also kinda inspired this imagine!

top gun: maverick masterlist

you've had a passion for flying ever since you were little. it came from spending time with your dad on the airbase whenever possible. seeing the glimmer in his eyes anytime he would return with a new story about flying the f-14s made you want to pursue the same thing, so you did.

the second you were able to sign up for flight school, you did. it was against your mother's wishes because she had already lost your father to the sky and didn't want to lose you too. ultimately, she knew there was no convincing you because once you had your heart set on something, that was it.

flight school was interesting, to say the least. the boys in your class didn't view you as much competition but ever since you smoked their asses on the first day, they were quick to respect you. during your time at flight school, you became super close with natasha aka phoenix as she was the only other girl present and you two got on like a house on fire.

when you found out you and pheonix were heading to top gun, you nearly threw up from the excitement. top gun was no joke. it was the elite school for the best of the best aviators and you were now one of them. it was difficult, wild and stressful but also you also had the best time of your life there. you met all kinds of new people, especially ones that you normally would never surround yourself with because they are cocky, egotistical and very full of themselves making them insufferable. so imagine your surprise when you ended up falling for said person.

jake 'hangman' seresin caught you by complete surprise. you and him didn't talk much until one day you were put together on the same team for beach volleyball as a team bonding exercise. no one knew that you were on your high school volleyball team and took them all the way to the championships so it was fun watching their faces when they realized how good you were at serving the ball.

"holy shit, y/c/s! you're pretty decent at this," hangman said dragging his eyes up and down your body. you were in a black sports bra and biker shorts, nothing too fancy yet the way his eyes lingered on you made you feel like you were dressed in the finest clothes.

"i think you mean to say she's fucking incredible!" phoenix proudly put her arm around your shoulders pulling you in and resting her head on yours. your team won 10 to 4 and it was all thanks to you.

the losing team had to buy the first round of drinks at the hard deck. fanboy and bob were not fans f that but still did it with a smile on their face. you were sat at the bar watching your team bond. one thing about you is that you liked to people watch, not in a creepy way but you liked to see people living in the moment. what you didn't realize is that hangman was observing you. he stopped playing pool with the boys and joined you at the bar.

"tell me something," he began as he pulled a seat next to you. you almost choked on your drink as you weren't expecting company. "where did you learn to serve like that? cause it looked killer,"

you smiled into your drink. "i played a little in high school."

"how did i not know that?" he scoffed.

you gazed into his eyes, slightly taken aback by how intensely he was staring back. "you never asked. in fact, you haven't spoken more than 10 words to me since we started at top gun so there wasn't ever a chance."

"well," he raised his empty glass. "it's time we change that."

you knew you shouldn't get sucked into his orbit but was too late the second you started to clench your thighs anytime he smiled at you, you were a goner.

taking your cup and clinking it against his, you grinned at him. "i guess it is."

"penny darling, another round please."

the two of you fell into a comfortable conversation. of course, hangman being hangman he flirted in the most obvious ways but you laughed it off. it was quite alarming how much you were starting to enjoy being in his presence but you brushed off those thoughts and embraced the moment. the rest of the bar fell into a blur and it was like you two were the only ones there until you two were actually the last ones there. he was a gentleman and asked to walk you back to the accommodation you shared with phoenix.

"this is me," you said walking up the steps to your door. you turned around and found him on the step below you so were at eye level.

"thanks for today. i had fun."

"name the time and place and i can always show you a good time," he smirked.

"okay hangman. good night," you started to turn around but his hand caught your arm.

"wait, y/n," you looked back and your heart softened a bit. you've never seen jake 'hangman' seresin so nervous before.

"do you-can i see you again?"

"yeah, i'm gonna see you tomorrow for class." you joked. you knew what hewas really asking but you wanted to make sweat a bit.

"yeah i guess you are," he said chuckling, scratching the back of his neck. "what i'm trying to say is i liked your company a lot tonight and i'd like to do it again in a more... intimate setting?"

you couldn't help but let out a giggle. "jake seresin, are you asking me out on a date?"

"only if you say yes"

you pretended to deliberate for a few seconds before putting him out of his misery. "i'd love to."

you had no idea then but those three words changed your life. you fully intended that date with hangman to be a one-off, but it turned onto second and third and with each passing day you fell more and more.

hangman and you wanted to keep things professional at school but off-hours, you were all over each other. because he couldn't touch you in front of your peers in private, his hands were always on you. while you two studied? his hand on your legs while it was on your lap. sleeping together? his hand will always find yours in the middle of the night. walking on the beach at night as you are right now? you guessed it, his hand was holding yours.

hangman was a confident man, to say the least, but he came undone when it came to you. it terrified him at first but it quickly became a strength of his because you made him want to be a better man. he loved you and he knew you loved him and in your shared world things moved so fast but he wanted one thing to remain constant and that was you.

you stopped at random and took in a deep breath. "i don't think i will ever get over the ocean breeze at night. it's incredible."

hangman's eyes were on you. "yeah, it is."

you looked back and smiled but it feel a little when you saw his look of unease. "hey, what's wrong?"

"n-nothing." he grabbed your hands and kissed your knuckles "it's all good."

"i know you too well to know it's not, so spill."

"i love you," he began. "like a lot. with everything that flight school or life could have prepared me for there was no way, i could have prepared for you. for the longest time, i thought that flying was my first love but i've never been more wrong. it's you y/n and i want to spend the rest of my life with you. only you."

your eyes were burning with unshed tears. "jake," you whispered.

he got down on one knee and opened a small black velvet box travelling a stunning ring. "there are many ways to be happy in this life but all i really need is you. so y/n 'y/c/s' y/l/n will you marry me?"

you got down on both knees not caring if the water was soaking your silk skirt. "yes! yes! a million times yes!"

he slid the ring on the appropriate finger before you took his face and kissed him as hard as you could. it took a second before hangman took full control of the kiss, running his hand through your hair.

you pulled away and brushed his nose with yours. "hi future husband."

"hi future wife," he kissed your forehead before lifting you back into a standing position with him.

you two couldn't wait months to plan a whole elaborate wedding to be married so on a random day you two had off, you went straight to the california city hall and got your papers.

you guys kept it very lowkey around others much like when you were dating but to the outside world, it looked a budding friendship. for the rest of your time at top gun, you guys pushed each other to be the best always trying to one-up each other. the competitiveness usually ended up with you two having hot sex later on but no one knew that. it wasn't until graduation day that the cat was out of the bag.

you had decided to hyphenate your last name and your husbands name and you wanted to be said like that when your name was called. "lieutenant y/n 'y/c/s' y/l/n-seresin."

whispers broke out among your peers but you stood up proudly and saluted your commanding officer before sitting back down. pheonix tried to catch your eye but you stared straight ahead not wanting to have a much-needed conversation non-verbally.

the second graduation was over you went over to the refreshments table. "i knew i'd find you here,"

the comforting voice slid his hands around your body and kisses your head. "i'm proud of you, baby"

"never in a million years did i ever think i'd see hangman so cuddly!" a voice called out behind you two.

you guys turned around and there was rooster, coyote, phoenix, fanboy and payback.

"someone quickly explain because i am so lost,” rooster said.

"surprise?" you nervously chuckled holding up your hand and hangman did the same showing off his wedding band.

"what? how? when?" fanboy asked.

hangman went on to tell the story and as you stood there watching him, surrounded by your friends, you were the happiest you had ever been. you and hangman went through tough times together and made it out the other side stronger. there is truly no other person you'd want to spend the rest of your life with.

[melanielocke]

Lost in the Shadows - Chapter one

Lucie, Cordelia, Thomas and Alastair are spending the summer in a small town at the edge of a forest. Lucie hopes she can finally tell Cordelia how she really feels, while Thomas hopes to get to know Alastair a bit better. Alastair and Cordelia are glad to get some time away from their family and their parents separating. But something is not right in the forest. People are disappearing, and a creature warns Thomas that he is in danger, that a debt to a powerful being has not yet been repaid and they will need to combine all their abilities to stop what’s coming, and save Thomas.

CW: past toxic relationship, past abuse, mentions of alcoholism, PTSD It won't be super gory, but can be creepy

Tag list: @foxglove-airmid @alastair-esfandiyar-carstairs1 @nott-the-best

Tagging @julywood because Thomas is one of the main characters

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32505550/chapters/80620474

‘Are you finished packing, Lulu?’

Lucie heard her father’s voice from behind the door of her bedroom, but she didn’t respond immediately. She was working on her story, and needed to finish this chapter so she could email it to Cordelia. She needed to concentrate, and that required blocking out all sounds coming from the outside world. The chapter had taken a bit longer than anticipated and the ghost of one of Cordelia’s dead boyfriends had somehow made its way into the chapter. Fictional Cordelia had had many boyfriends and all had died tragic deaths to make way for the next. She currently didn’t have a boyfriend and Lucie wasn’t planning another one yet. The real Cordelia had only dated her brother James for a while a year ago. Lucie didn’t think she wanted real Cordelia to have a boyfriend either.

The door opened and her father peeked inside. ‘You haven’t started packing at all, have you?’

‘I need to finish my chapter for Cordelia,’ Lucie insisted. ‘She will be stuck in a very long car ride with only Alastair for company and she needs something to occupy herself with.’

Lucie would be staying the summer with her parents in her grandmother’s manor, whereas her grandmother would be traveling to southern Italy with a couple of friends. While Lucie was usually excited about spending her summer there, she had feared it would be lonely considering her brother James wouldn’t be coming this year. He’d graduated school and he and his best friend Matthew were going to travel across the continent by themselves. She’d feared she’d be alone all summer, but then Thomas, her closest friend besides Cordelia, had convinced his parents to travel to the same town this summer, renting a cottage nearby her grandmother’s house.

‘Alright, I’ll pack for you,’ her father said. ‘But if you find your swimsuit or your sparrow plush toy is missing, then I will not be held responsible.’

‘Jack is coming,’ Lucie insisted, referring to her sparrow plush toy she’d once named after Jack Sparrow, and she put her laptop away to put her plush toy in her bag.

After a short moment of contemplation she put her new pink bikini and an older black and red striped one piece in there too. There was a lake close to grandmother’s manor and Lucie expected she’d go swimming regularly. She returned to her laptop, and tried to think of a good ending for the chapter. She didn’t like to end everything in a cliffhanger, but the story needed to remain intriguing.

‘No clothes? Underwear?’ her father asked.

Lucie considered just bringing everything suitable for the summer but realized they didn’t have that much space in the car. So instead she opened her closet, picked out some tops, skirts, dresses and jumpsuits and put them into her bag. She would probably regret leaving something behind later on but there was no time. Just to be sure, she went over the closet again and added a couple more dresses. She couldn’t leave her new yellow wrap dress behind, she’d sent Cordelia a picture of her wearing it a couple of weeks ago after she’d bought it and Cordelia had commented that she looked gorgeous. Lucie suspected it was just Cordelia being nice but the comment had still made her heart run wild.

She added enough underwear to last her several weeks and then went back to adding clothes at random until the bags were full.

‘Done,’ she announced, and she went back to her laptop, finishing her chapter.

Adding in a ghost was a difficult choice, but Lucie had decided fictional ghosts behaved similarly to real ghosts. Lucie had never seen a ghost of a dead boyfriend though. She hadn’t seen Jesse Blackthorn even once since he’d died four years ago.

When the chapter was finished, she emailed it to Cordelia, hoping she would receive it before she and her brother left home. Cordelia had almost not been allowed to come stay with her family this summer, her father tended to be strict and wanted to keep Cordelia at home. There had been some trouble lately at the Carstairs home though, and Cordelia’s mother had decided it would be good for her to go spend time with Lucie. Cordelia’s brother Alastair had decided to come with her, although Lucie wasn’t sure why. Either way, Lucie had decided she and Cordelia were going to have the greatest summer ever.

 ***

Thomas hadn’t been this excited about going on a vacation with his parents in a while. The small town where they’d be staying sounded boring, and certainly wasn’t the location most boys his age wanted to spend the summer, but then Thomas wasn’t interested in drinking and partying all night and would much rather explore forests and go swimming in lakes with Lucie Herondale. That wasn’t the main reason he was excited though. A week ago, Lucie had confirmed her close friend Cordelia Carstairs would be staying the summer with her, and a couple of days later Lucie had informed him Cordelia’s brother Alastair would be coming as well.

Thomas had gone to school with Alastair for a year, Alastair a year ahead of him, and at the time Alastair had been rather awful, especially to Thomas’ friends James and Matthew. To be fair, Alastair’s jokes about Matthew behaving like his mother were funny. Matthew did behave like his mother, always coming to collect him when he’d spent too much time around Alastair. Why he’d fallen in love with Alastair anyway, he wasn’t sure. He’d been intrigued by the mystery, he guessed, Alastair’s sad eyes and vicious tongue.

But after that year, Alastair had changed schools, and had gone to school with Lucie and Cordelia instead and he’d heard much from Lucie about him. Alastair had defended Lucie from bullies had kept to himself and created this image of someone who was untouchable, no longer a bully, but he would destroy you if you even considered hurting his sister or her friend Lucie. Thomas was once more intrigued. While James and Matthew were still angry, Thomas had decided he must have changed and he was thankful Alastair had protected Lucie, heaven knew that girl knew how to get herself into trouble.

Thomas checked his phone for the millionth time. He was done packing, but his parents were not. Lucie hadn’t send any new texts and Thomas suspected she needed to pack or finish the latest chapter of her novel before her parents left. She’d listed some ideas that might help him spend more time alone with Alastair, although Thomas was not yet sure if he wanted that. He wasn’t out to anyone but Lucie yet, and although he intended to tell his parents, he wasn’t yet sure how. He wasn’t yet sure he was ready for a relationship, and although he liked Alastair, he was also a bit intimidated by him.

Barbara had sent a message, and Thomas opened it. It was a picture of her and Oliver in front of the Eiffel Tower. Barbara and her boyfriend Oliver had gone to Paris to celebrate their two year anniversary and to celebrate Barbara graduating as a nurse.

Thomas texted a response and put his phone in his bag and walked outside, checking to see if his parents needed any help. A couple of gnomes were running around the garden. Thomas didn’t mind them, they took good care of the garden, and were far from dangerous, but they could get up to mischief. He’d learned that whenever cookies, forks or socks went missing, it was usually the garden gnomes. They lived in forests sometimes, but also liked to build their homes in human gardens. Of course, most humans had no idea they were there, but Thomas could see all sorts of strange creatures. Most were harmless, so Thomas never minded much. He didn’t seek out the supernatural, but he didn’t mind its presence.

Both his mother and Barbara had the same gift, and although Eugenia didn’t she had learnt to see the gnomes. Thomas had found out everyone could learn to see the supernatural if they knew what to look for and knew it was out there. Most people didn’t believe so they didn’t see, but Eugenia had grown up with a mother and siblings who saw everything whether they wanted to or not. She had always known what was out there.

Eugenia and her friend Kamala would be spending the summer in India this year, they’d saved up for months for their big trip. Thomas suspected they might be more than just friends but so far Eugenia had not confirmed this.

‘We’re almost done,’ his mother promised, handing him a plate of cookies. ‘Give some to the gnomes, will you? To show them our thanks for taking care of the garden.’

Thomas went into the backyard where even more gnomes had gathered. It was difficult to imagine most people could look at this scene and see nothing out of the ordinary, when several gnomes were running around, holding something shiny in their hands.

‘The car keys,’ Thomas groaned out loud and he put the plate of cookies on the ground.

‘You can have these, but please give me the keys back,’ he said.

The gnomes said something, but Thomas didn’t understand their language, and then attacked the plate of cookies, dropping the car keys in the process. Thomas picked them up before the gnomes realized anything, and picked up the plate as soon as it was empty. Gnomes could be monsters when it came to cookies and they didn’t have table manners, they just attacked any food they saw. Thomas couldn’t blame them.

Thomas quickly washed the plate and put it back with the others before joining his parents again, who were finally finished with everything.

‘Feeding the gnomes again, Sophie?’ his father asked. ‘Are you sure that many cookies are healthy for them?’

His mother shrugged. ‘They’re gnomes, Gideon. Who knows what’s healthy for them?’

His father couldn’t argue with that logic. Thomas wondered if there would be gnomes too at the cottage where they would be staying, or if other creatures would show themselves. Thomas had learned that if there was a myth or any kind of story depicting it, it probably existed somewhere, but most such beings were very rare and so far Thomas had mostly encountered gnomes.

Checking the car one last time to see if they had everything, Thomas got into the passenger seat next to his mother who would be driving, his father behind. Thomas had gotten too tall to fit in the backseat of this car and sitting there for a long drive would be unnecessarily painful. Besides, Thomas was better at reading maps than his father, and if they got lost they would depend on him to find the way.

As they drove, Thomas couldn’t help but think of Alastair Carstairs. Why had he decided to join the Herondales? Thomas didn’t think he was particularly close to Lucie, although he knew Will Herondale had a weak spot for anything that carried the name Carstairs. He wasn’t surprised the Herondales had invited him along. Could he be thinking of Thomas? And would Lucie’s plans to get them to spend time together help, or only make everything worse?

 ***

‘I cannot get this bag to close,’ Cordelia complained.

‘Perhaps that’s because there’s a limit to how much fits in there,’ Alastair said without looking up.

He was finished packing, of course. Cordelia, on the other hand, had decided she had not yet enough clothes packed and with some suggestions from her mother and aunt Risa had tried to add more.

‘Don’t you have another bag for me?’ Cordelia asked, annoyed.

She loved Alastair, but sharing a room with him was a bit too much and they’d gotten on each other’s nerves. They were currently staying with their aunt Risa, their mother too, but Risa’s apartment was a bit small for all of them. It was a temporary situation and Cordelia hoped that after the summer she and Alastair didn’t have to share a room anymore. At least in the Herondale manor, there were plenty of rooms and Cordelia intended to get one as far away from her brother as possible. Alastair tended to be neat, and his half of the room was always perfectly in order, whereas Cordelia was a bit messier, and both were irritated with the other.

‘You can check if any of my bags have some space left. Or you can leave the bag opened and put it in the car like this and hope it doesn’t end with clothes littered everywhere.’

Cordelia went to the building’s parking garage and to the car and put the bag there, half open, making sure nothing fell out. No one but the two of them would be fitting in there with how much Alastair had packed. Cordelia couldn’t imagine he’d need all that, but she knew better than to attempt to convince her brother he could leave something behind.

Back inside, she saw Alastair sitting on his bed, vaguely staring into the distance as if he was daydreaming.

‘Alastair, stop doing that,’ Cordelia said.

Calling his name usually brought him out even when his senses were closed off from the world around him. Alastair had an ability that Cordelia best described as him being Harry Potter’s pensieve. He could revisit his own memories, and if they allowed it, other people’s memories as well, as well as bring people with him into memories. Alastair tended to stay out of other people’s memories, but could get lost in his own. Outside their family, no one knew about it and Alastair preferred to keep it that way.  

The Carstairs family had always been aware of the supernatural, of course. Once their father Elias had carried the magic sword cortana and fought evil creatures with it. That had been a long time ago though, and Cordelia owned cortana now, but she had never used it to fight anything beyond straw men in the backyard. She didn’t have any abilities though, not beyond her connection the sword, nothing like Alastair’s odd memory. Neither of them understood why he was that way.

‘Were you revisiting your break up again?’ Cordelia asked then.

She knew he’d been revisiting that memory over and over lately, although she didn’t understand why. It couldn’t possibly make him feel better, could it? Of course, Alastair wasn’t exactly known for making the healthiest choices when it came to coping.

‘Charles has been texting me,’ Alastair said, his face blank. ‘I made sure that when I broke up with him, I was very clear about not wanting him to contact me. I wanted to see if there was anything I said that might have made my meaning unclear, any invitation for him to keep texting me.’

‘I don’t think Charles has ever listened to a thing you said,’ Cordelia said. ‘That’s his problem, not yours. Have you blocked his number yet?’

Alastair didn’t say anything.

‘You can block him,’ Cordelia insisted. ‘And you should. It’s creepy how he keeps texting you.’

As far as Cordelia was concerned, Charles had been creepy long before that, ever since he began a relationship with her brother despite Alastair only being sixteen at the time when Charles was six years older than him. Charles must have known how wrong and creepy that was, even if Alastair hadn’t.

Alastair hadn’t told anyone about his relationship, not ready to come out yet, which must have been convenient to Charles. Cordelia had only found out four months ago when she’d started to worry about Alastair, how he’d seemed more nervous and prickly than usual, how he’d lost weight from not eating. Reluctantly, Alastair had told her about his relationship, and Cordelia had been horrified to learn just how much abuse he’d accepted, believing that was how relationships worked. After a month of Cordelia trying to convince him of how toxic Charles was, Alastair had broken up with him. She’d been very protective of him ever since finding out, and was glad he’d decided to come stay with the Herondales with her this summer. Some time away from everything would be good for him, right?

Then Cordelia had found out Alastair had been keeping even more secrets from her, this one surrounding their father. Cordelia had always loved her father and looked up to him, a former warrior who’d slain the supernatural horror that had taken his brother and sister in law, a former hero who’d fallen ill in later life. A while ago their cousin Jem, who was a psychiatrist, had visited, despite their father trying to keep him away from their family, and he’d noticed Alastair was not doing well after an anger outburst. Cordelia and her mother had always assumed Alastair’s moodiness and anger outbursts were just him being a difficult teenager, although at eighteen he was getting a bit old for that. Jem, familiar with mental disorders, had recognized symptoms of something more.

He had recommended Alastair see a therapist. After some pressure from both her and Jem, Alastair had gone and he’d been diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder. Cordelia had found out father was not sick, but addicted to alcohol instead. Alastair had spent years protecting her from the effects, attempting to take care of father while he was drunk so she have the illusion of a normal childhood. Now that she knew, she guessed she understood a bit better why Alastair had thought what Charles had offered was love.

‘I guess I can block him,’ Alastair said.

‘I’m serious,’ Cordelia insisted. ‘You have to stop revisiting bad memories, you’ll only get hurt again. I don’t like seeing you hurt.’

Alastair took his phone out his pocket, presumably blocked Charles’ number, and put it back.

‘Are you ready to go, Layla?’ he asked.

When Cordelia was young, she’d loved the story of Layla and Majnun her mother used to tell her, and Alastair and her mother had taken to calling her Layla.

‘Ready when you are,’ Cordelia said. ‘Lucie just emailed me the latest chapter of the beautiful Cordelia. I’ll have plenty to do on the way.’

[breanime]

Theoretically if rio's cute neighbour, the one that watched his son, was being harassed by an ex or just some creepy guy. What would rio do?

So you can find the first neighbor headcannon list here. Also, this headcannon list got long as hell... haha, sorry?

*gif not mine*

Rio had been out of town for the last week, handling business

He’d texted you to let you know he’d be back soon--

--partly to be a good neighbor, and partly cause he wanted to see you

The two of you weren’t dating, but there was definitely something between you

(sexual tension)

And Rio was eager to see where it would go

He walked down the hall to his apartment, his bag slung over his shoulder, glad to be back in his own space

Then he saw your door

The wood was cracked, as if someone had punched it or something, and Rio stopped dead in his tracks

He knocked on your door, eyebrows knitted

You answered with a bat in your hands

“Huh...” Rio said, eyes roaming your body--from your tense posture to the bat in your hands to the tired, exhausted look in your eyes. “... Rough week without me, mama?”

“Oh, Rio,” you sighed, and Rio watched your body relax, “Sorry. I was just--”

“Expecting someone else?” He asked, walking into your apartment. 

He dropped his bag at the foot of the couch and turned to you, frowning

Rio watched as you locked both locks on the door behind him; he’d been in your place about 100 times now, and he’d never seen you do that before

“Yeah, kind of...” You answered. “How was your trip?”

“Fine,” he answered, sticking his hands in his pockets, “but I don’t wanna talk about that right now. Let’s talk about you.” He titled his head. “What’s going on here?”

You sighed again, and Rio wanted to hold you. You were stressed, and he longed to fix it

“I’ve just...” You crossed your arms, hugging yourself. “I don’t want to bother you with it.”

Rio took a few steps forward, until he was in front of you. He eyed you seriously. Someone so beautiful, he thought, shouldn’t look so sad. Not when he was around to help. 

“Bother me,” he said softly, his voice firm but low

“Last year...” You began, looking down. “...I dated this guy, and he was just...” You shook your head. “He was an ass. We broke up, and I never heard from him again... till a week ago... The night before you left.”

Rio’s eyes narrowed; he remembered that night. He’d taken you out for drinks before his trip, spending the night smiling and laughing with you. He’d gotten a call in the middle of it, and when he came back to the table, he saw a man walking away. But you hadn’t said anything about it, and you seemed fine, so he didn’t ask about it.

“The guy from the restaurant...” Rio said, nodding to himself. “That’s your ex.”

“He saw us out, and when you stepped away, he came up to me--but all he did was say hi. He wasn’t weird or aggressive or anything,” you said back, “But then he... I guess he found out where I lived...”

“Yeah,” Rio licked his lips, “that his handy work on the door?”

“Yeah,” you nodded back, “Every day since that night, he’s been calling me nonstop and showing up here, pounding on the door. I called the cops, but they said there’s nothing they can do unless he actually hurts me, so--”

“I got you,” Rio said, grabbing his bag 

He turned to go, but you held onto his arm.

“What are you gonna do?” You asked, eyes wide.

He looked down at you

On one hand, he could lie to you, keep up the polite charade that he made his money the legal way, that his business was simply in “providing capital” like he’d told you once before. The two of you hadn’t ever explicitly discussed what he did, but Rio knew you knew his vague descriptions of his business were just that: pointedly vague

But on the other hand... he could tell you the truth. Maybe you’d be cool with it.

Or maybe you’d shy away and turn from him. 

Either way, he was going to handle this for you, but he couldn’t deny--

--he wanted you to be ok with it. With him. For some reason, as Rio looked down at you, he saw something special, something that made him feel protective of you, something beyond the lust and friendly affection he had for you

When he looked at you, he saw a partner

 “I’ma tell him that the next time he so much glances up at this apartment,” Rio answered evenly, “I’m gonna put a bullet between his eyes. And if he doesn’t like that, I’ll put him down then and there.”

“You... You’d do that for me?” You asked, pretty eyes wide

“I’d of had this handled already if you would’ve told me before,” he confessed, reaching out to cup your face in his hand, “but since I’m here now, I’ll handle it personally.” He leaned down, his mouth just inches from yours. Rio wanted to kiss you so badly, he felt the desire in every part of him with you so close. “Stay here,” he told you, “I’ll be back in a few hours.”

He didn’t move, though, and neither did you.

Your hand flexed on his bicep, wanting to bring him even closer. “Rio, I...thank you.”

He smirked. “Don’t thank me yet.” He leaned in closer, about to say something else

And then you kissed him

Rio had kissed a lot of women in his life (a lot...like a lot a lot...)

But never had a pair of lips felt so good against his own. 

Rio’s arms wrapped around you, and he silently marveled at how perfectly you fit against him. He titled his head, slipping his tongue into your mouth, and you moaned into him. 

Chuckling, Rio’s hands went to your waist, and he led you towards the couch

You took a hold of his collar and dragged him down onto the couch with you, your legs wrapping around his waist as he laid on top of you

“Baby,” he chuckled into your lips, “I gotta go.”

“I know,” you said back, grinning, “I just need a few more minutes...”

He laughed. “For what?” He asked, even as he dipped his head down to start kissing your neck. The little sounds you made when his lips ghosted against your skin were driving him wild. 

...the ex might have to wait a bit.

Rio was kissing your collarbones while lifting up your shirt when a loud band sounded behind him

You jumped, but Rio just turned lazily, one eyebrow raised

“It’s him,” you whispered, and when Rio looked down at you, he could see the fear in your eyes

This, he decided, would be the last time you would ever look like that

“Relax,” he said, his voice low and calm. He leaned down and kissed you sweetly, and he felt you relax under his touch. “I got this. Just stay here,  mi bonita chica.”

Rio got up, kissing the top of your head as you sat up, and reached down into his bag.

“Y/N,” the banging was louder now, “I’m not playing with you--open this damn door right now!”

Rio grinned--it would be his pleasure

Rio opened the door and leaned on the doorway, a lazy smirk on his face. “Hey,” he greeted the man, “you know this is a private residence?”

The man blinked, taking a step back, and Rio chuckled. He knew this type: big, loud, and bad--until someone badder came around. 

“Wh--what the hell are you doing here...?” The man asked, craning his neck to try to peek into the apartment. 

“Yo,” Rio stood up straight, shaking his head, “What you lookin’ for? Huh?” He stepped up, and your ex stepped back again. “Y/N?” He asked. “She ain’t your concern no more, homie. I am.”

“I--I don’t--”

“Oh,” Rio chuckled, “That’s right, I’m sorry. I haven’t introduced myself.” He whipped out his gun, pointing it directly at the guy’s paling face. “I’m Rio. I’m the man Y/N’s currently seeing, and she wanted me to let you know that this shit,” he waved the gun, the smile no longer on his face, and the man backed up into the wall, eyes wide with terror, “Is done with. You stop callin’, you stop comin’ around, and you definitely stop trying to intimidate her into talkin’ to you. Matter of fact,” Rio went on, “the next time you see her, you better get the fuck away, cause if I hear about you even breathing in the same space as her again,” he stepped up and pressed the golden gun into the guy’s forehead, “I can’t promise I’ll stay this controlled. Is that understood?”

The ex nodded, looking like a bobblehead with his huge eyes “I---”

“No no no,” Rio smiled, “don’t speak.” He glanced back at you, you were standing in front of the couch now, watching. “You got any cash on you?”

He nodded

“Great,” Rio said brightly, “let’s see it.”

The guy reached into his pocket and took out his wallet, handing it over to Rio

“Mm...” Rio eyed his ID, memorizing the name and address for later use. “This looks like just enough to cover the cost of repairing the door,” he said, taking out a wad of bills, “and a lil extra for emotional damage.”

Rio threw the wallet back at your ex, who caught it, eyes never leaving the gun in Rio’s hand

“Okay now...” Rio grinned. “Run.”

He didn’t have to say it twice, your ex scurried away so quickly, that he fell half-way down the hall and just crawled into the elevator. If Rio didn’t know any better, he’d say he smelt piss in the hall now...

Rio closed your door, tossing the gun--which was empty--onto his bag on the floor

He turned to you, laughing when you launched yourself into his arms

“Thank you,” you said, your head buried in his chest, “thank you, thank you, thank you--”

“I told you,” he said, smiling down at you, “I got you. And yo, I was thinkin’...” He held up the cash. “...why don’t you use this on some self-defense lessons, just for fun?”

“But what about the door?”

“Ah, baby,” he leaned down, kissing you, “that’s what we got a super for!”

*******************************************************************************************

Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think! 

Everything Taglist: @encounterthepast @jigsawlover10 @gollyderek @charlylama @realduckvader @whovianayesha  @lexxierave@loveintheroyalfamily  @fanfictionrecommendations-com  @maxslime-blog@songforhema @lucielandss @themadhatter92  @christinawxxx @anabella-baby @blackcoffeeandgreenteaforme @luminex3 @ashkuuuu @luckysstrikes@carlaangel86 @floralpeaceofmind @dylanobrusso @iaintnofurry  @ymariejp@its-my-little-dumpster-fire @mrsjaxtellerfan @holamor @drinix @rhabakoli@stories-you-wont-hear @king4thesirens @leahnicole1219 @evanlys19 @binbons-is-theloml @aikeia @bitch-imma-head-out​  @witchygagirl@geeksareunique @sparrows-books  @nyxxnoxx​ @justvnash​ @truly-insatiable​

Rio Taglist: @gemini0410​ @sweetybuzz25 @glimmerglittergirl @gensneverland @jamielennkeeler

[sagamemes]

critrole sentences  —  thursday by night, part one.   here and below the cut, there’s 160+ lines of dialogue from with the first installment of the two-part show. themes in these sentences are supernatural, survival situations, danger and murder.some more casual things dropped in there to spice things up... but mostly it’s about weird or bad things happening. go wild with horror and supernatural and zombie aus. change names, pronouns, diction, anything to your liking.  tw:  death, violence, uh... consumption of humans, gore mentions.

❝  i'd say you're dead to me, but, you know. you're dead to everybody.  ❞

❝  he's wearing my jacket. if you get blood on my jacket, i'm gonna be very upset.  ❞

❝  they like disney films. cheese. amazon gift cards.  ❞

❝  maybe they have some leftover chinese.  ❞

❝  finish it. finish it, i dare you.  ❞

❝  are you gonna suck [name]'s blood?!  ❞

❝  if we break the magic, everything comes back to normal, that's how these things work.  ❞

❝  it's probably just sean. he works so late.  ❞

❝  we're gonna get the fuck out of here, and we're gonna take you with us.  ❞

❝  look at my teeth!  ❞

❝  come and sit down, have some tea, it's just what you need.  ❞

❝  don't fucking jump out and scare me, i'm gonna fucking attack—  ❞

❝  i never get this kind of positive feedback, i'm actually liking this.  ❞

❝  he's your [petname/friend/brother], man. make sure he's gonna...  ❞

❝  you're actually the person i'm most concerned about.  ❞

❝  it doesn't look like you're in a lot of pain, i can't tell?  ❞

❝  yeah, you guys are fucked.  ❞

❝  it's the only door the keycard won't open. /i don't know why./  ❞

❝  don't think i don't have plans.  ❞

❝  we would be doing so well if [name] was with us right now. he would know what to do.  ❞

❝  this looks like a really crazy game that you're playing.  ❞

❝  we don't tell [name].  ❞

❝  you're nothing without us!  ❞

❝  i found a bunch of pencils.  ❞

❝  somehow, he looks less creepy.  ❞

❝  you're here to keep everybody safe.  ❞

❝  i just kicked someone in the face and they laughed!  ❞

❝  you wanna switch?  i take the dagger, you take the giant sword?  ❞

❝  whoever comes out, it's not gonna go well for that person.  ❞

❝  i am not going to kill you.  ❞

❝  /i/ am not going to kill you.  ❞

❝  you really need to keep me safe so i can get us out of here.  ❞

❝  i'm gonna be honest with you. not all of this was the plan.  ❞

❝  how do i end?  ❞

❝  do you usually touch things that look like they're gonna explode?  ❞

❝  what did we learn about drinking the tea?  ❞

❝  there are, for some strange reason, lucky charms in the cabinet.  ❞

❝  those might also be worth some money.  ❞

❝  you guys have your own language.  ❞

❝  you and i will just get out of here.  ❞

❝  i wanna eat [food/"food"] again. it was really good.  ❞

❝  if you're really squeamish, it's gonna get a little weird.  ❞

❝  how well and intimately do you know [name]? ...could you recognise him by just—parts?  ❞

❝  you could've lied and i wouldn't have known that!  ❞

❝  knock... seven times when the coast is clear. no one knocks seven times, that's ridiculous.  ❞

❝  i gotta get to the office.  ❞

❝  dad's coming back any second now.  ❞

❝  evil people don't pinky-swear!  evil people middle-finger-swear!  ❞

❝  is anything safe?  i mean, come on.  ❞

❝  can i take my shirt off—?  ❞

❝  what's the matter? you love lucky charms!  ❞

❝  we're really thankful that you're here, but...  ❞

❝  oh man, this is intense. i'm not even sure this feeling is a high, i don't know what this is.  ❞

❝  i've been busy all week.  ❞

❝  that's a very good keycard.  ❞

❝  the wedding is probably not happening.  ❞

❝  welcome to terrible decisions in my life.  ❞

❝  she'll freak out.  ❞

❝  i convinced [name] that i'm on her side.  ❞

❝  i really like [name] but i kinda feel like we should kill her.  ❞

❝  half the people you've talked about i've never heard of.  ❞

❝  you stay close to me.  ❞

❝  [name]'s a goner.  ❞

❝  mushrooms have never sat well with me.  ❞

❝  life needs things to live.  ❞

❝  how cute is the rat?  ❞

❝  there's still time. things can still get weird.  ❞

❝  it's gonna get a little weird and i'm so sorry.  ❞

❝  will it explode if i touch it?  ❞

❝  do we get a refund on the wedding gift?  ❞

❝  they're saying that if things go pear-shaped, they're gonna fuck us and take care of each other.  ❞

❝  i could ask upstairs.  ❞

❝  we're all kids when we're in the jaws of a werewolf.  ❞

❝  i mean, if you're gonna be a big girl about it.  ❞

❝  okay, if shit goes down, i'll help you.  ❞

❝  this is not a riddle, i don't have time for that shit.  ❞

❝  i feel funny. i'm really hungry.  ❞

❝  i'm glad you asked though, it's very polite.  ❞

❝  you don't wanna go upstairs.  ❞

❝  only i know.  ❞

❝  we can't tell [name], they were about to get married!  ❞

❝  this doesn't make any sense, but so much sense, at the same time.  ❞

❝  you have some weird people working here, you know that?  ❞

❝  [softly] jazz hands.  ❞

❝  i didn't seem like it was possible to win.  ❞

❝  if things go pear-shaped, i got you.  ❞

❝  can i just quickly admit that i don't know the layout of the building at all?  ❞

❝  pick up the ashes!  ❞

❝  have some tea. we'll explain everything.  ❞

❝  something is wrong.  ❞

❝  quick note:  we could get out of here and leave everybody else.  ❞

❝  oh my god, i killed someone?  ❞

❝  something is wrong, including the giant sign on the wall painted in blood that says  ‘ something is wrong ’.  ❞

❝  this place is even more trashed than normal.  ❞

❝  wow. you /love/ me.  ❞

❝  is this one of those magician tricks where you're telling me to pull a certain card and i don't realise it?  ❞

❝  i've been wanting to get you in one of my games for a while.  ❞

❝  i love the impulse for violence.  ❞

❝  evil people don't pinky-swear!  ❞

❝  we are in a survival situation!  ❞

❝  i ate a rat, baby!  ❞

❝  don't burn the company down [when/while] i'm dead.  ❞

❝  could somebody get me out of wherever the fuck it is that i am?  ❞

❝  i know you're not supposed to be in this meeting.  ❞

❝  how much you overestimate me.  ❞

❝  you are super cute and all but could you get me out?  ❞

❝  [name], this is messed up! [other person] and [other person] are dead!  ❞

❝  [name]... [i/you] don't drink tea.  ❞

❝  hey, that was a tough night, but i'm sorry, are you okay?  ❞

❝  you're huge! you can like, deadlift a house, you can't bust down a door?  ❞

❝  what the fuck happened to you?!  ❞

❝  i feel like you haven't /earned/ that kind of information yet.  ❞

❝  it doesn't taste right.  ❞

❝  i hate to rush into anything too hastily.  ❞

❝  oh, yeah, right, you're married.  ❞

❝  i'm having fun in the most terrifying way possible.  ❞

❝  now we all know how you feel about us.  ❞

❝  i'm just terrified i'll still have a deadline if i ever get out of here.  ❞

❝  stop sticking your fingers in your mouth!  ❞

❝  i never know what you're talking about.  ❞

❝  maybe there's a way to undo it.  ❞

❝  i feel like this is real life.  ❞

❝  [it/she] thinks you're the nicest, sweetest, most wonderful person.  ❞

❝  we're gonna find a phone.  ❞

❝  there's a lot of work to be done.  ❞

❝  i'm judging you hard. real hard.  ❞

❝  i don't know what any of these buttons do.  ❞

❝  i don't see his head.  ❞

❝  i think we're all fucked up.  ❞

❝  we keep the lights on at this place.  ❞

❝  we've never fucking drank tea.  ❞

❝  you know me:  this is not a riddle.  ❞

❝  it was like breakfast pizza and... gyros.  ❞

❝  i'm gonna club her in the back of the head, and then we're gonna run off like bandits.  ❞

❝  don't judge.  ❞

❝  sorry about the stabbing.  ❞

❝  well, ask me no more questions and i'll tell you no more lies!  ❞

❝  man, you're nervous!  ❞

❝  the fuck are you talking about?!  ❞

❝  it's not safe out there, shut the—!  ❞

❝  [name], show me your hands!  ❞

❝  you think this is magic?  ❞

❝  i was born in a box.  ❞

❝  this is like jumping out of an aeroplane without a parachute but knowing it's foam underneath.  ❞

❝  we said that we would look after each other.  ❞

❝  everybody's a kid when you're a vampire.  ❞

❝  everyone here, i don't know why, kinda likes me. i'm an idiot, but they do.  ❞

❝  [name] must be so worried.  ❞

❝  i'm sorry i told you you look like shit right after everything happened. i didn't think about it.  ❞

❝  i just punched through the floor.  ❞

❝  it's not that cute.  ❞

❝  you know, you should never meet your heroes.  ❞

❝  they're kind of refreshing. don't judge, man.  ❞

❝  you're my best friend. /they're/ my best friends, but they're /married/, they have to help each other. so you and me—...  ❞

❝  everybody likes me here.  ❞

❝  you keep me alive—we all live.  ❞

❝  i ate a /man/.  ❞

❝  of course! of course, i know what's going on;  that's my job. i know what's going on.  ❞

❝  i have a good mind for these things and you know what?  my intuition is saying i go first.  ❞

❝  i think that's a compliment.  ❞

[mrsgreenworld]

Son Yaz Episode 23

"İmkansız" ("The Impossible") aka It's Worth It

It's strange but after the last episode I've been thinking a lot about Arrow. Sure I'm a big Arrow and Olicity fan. Hell, they're the reason I got a Tumblr account. When the show ended, it was tough. Because it had been a part of my life for several years and it resonated with me deeply and it had given me a sense of community and belonging. So I feared I would never feel it again. But then Sen Çal Kapımı kinda attacked me, pulled me in and it was so great - feeling this passionate about something again. And despite SCK having turned into a mess and huge disappointment, I'll always appreciate those early days and keep them in my heart. After all, it brought me to you @lolo-deli and @djemsostylist. This alone is something I'm very grateful for. But my disappointment with SCK left me wondering yet again: would I ever find something worth watching and shipping and obsessing over? I got my answer when, after having seen all the amazing gifs by @aslibekroglu, I finally gave in and started watching Son Yaz. And it's completely taken over my life ever since. Not in a way SCK had back in the day. By similar to the way I felt when I was watching Arrow. I know it may seem kinda crazy because Son Yaz and Arrow are two completely different shows. Like, two shows cannot be any further apart, almost to the point of polar opposites. But I've realized that, if we look past the genre, language, the storytelling and all other differences, there's something very similar in the heart and core of both these shows. I looked at Akgün in the last episode and holy shit how much he reminded me of Oliver Queen. And I'll gladly explain why. Let's get down to it.

Akgün

So how the hell did I end up comparing Akgün Gökalp Taşkın and Oliver Queen? It's very simple really (at least it is in my mind 🙈😆) and I'm surprised I haven't made this connection before. Because both Akgün and Oliver are essentially the same type of character - a tortured hero, tainted by darkness and burdened with past sins but ultimately a very good person with a pure heart, bright light inside and infinite capacity to love. Both of them don't hesitate to make sacrifices for those they love, they can be borderline suicidal when it comes to protecting their loved ones. Sure Oliver had a mission and wanted to make a difference by helping people and protecting the whole city. Akgün doesn't have these ambitions. But then again Son Yaz isn't a superhero type of show. But if we remove the "super" part and focus on just the men, we'll see that what they both crave is actually very simple - love and family. I also think that Akgün reminds me of Oliver more now because in season 1, despite his difficult childhood and the loss of his mother, there still was some innocence left in him, he wasn't truly touched by the darkness. It changed when he shot his brother and helped Selim beat up to death and then buried a man, possibly still alive. Taking someone's life robs a person of innocence. Same thing happened to Oliver. However, he's way more acquainted with darkness, given how he dropped bodies left and right at the beginning of his vigilante career. It's clear that Akgün and Oliver had very different journeys but it's impossible for me to ignore the core similarities.

Another thing Akgün and Oliver have in common is their desire to not just protect their loved ones from the dangers and evil of this world, but also from themselves, their own darkness. They deem themselves unworthy of the women they love. Akgün even straight out confessed it to Yağmur in the moment of panic. That's the reason he left - he didn't want to taint her with his darkness. But then again, he's never truly left her or given up on her. He's given up on himself. He's doomed himself to loneliness.

I must say that episode 23 in general made me love Akgün even more. We saw not only his devotion and fierce love for Yağmur but his love and loyalty to Soner. Their brotp is one of the best things on this show and I sure hope they won't destroy it.

The Rocket Team (yes, the name is now canon!!!!) reunion gave me all the feels. Seeing these three grown men turn into teary eyed mess just melted my heart.

Throughout the whole episode we saw Akgün trying to be there for everyone. He didn't want to argue with and go against Selim but he also didn't want to betray Soner. The scene where Akgün met with Selim and told him that Soner and Naz had gotten married, made me so proud of him. He was the reasonable one in that moment. That's a first 🙈😆 At the end of the scene Akgün also managed to make me laugh. Really laugh. I didn't think I would be laughing any time soon this season but his wild gestures, his frustration with Selim and his "just listen to me for once" - all of that was funny to watch.

Just like I said, Akgün was supportive and tried being there for everyone, that's why he was immediately on board with the wedding. Soner had to only ask and it's like the three years of not having seen each other were erased in that moment. Akgün didn't try to talk Soner out of it, didn't ask any questions. He did remind Soner of the consequences but it was very cautious, filled with love and concern, without overstepping and disrespecting Soner's choice.

Then there was Yağmur... Akgün and Soner going to search for her and then the moment when Akgün found Yağmur in that storage room - that was for sure the highlight of the episode for me. First we saw Akgün and Soner working together as a well-oiled machine. Perfect partners in crime 😎 And after they split, the moment when Akgün stopped for a second and just smelled Yağmur... Damn. Such a parallel to Yağmur smelling him in episode 22. It doesn't matter how many years have passed, what they've been through, how much they've changed, doesn't matter if there's anger and pain and so much unsaid between them - they still just feel each other. Their connection is there, strong as ever. And Alperen totally knocked it out of the park, showing Akgün's panic and raw fear the moment he found Yağmur. He'd never seen her like that and it shook him to the core. I swear he looked ready to cut his chest open, take out his heart or, I don't know, lungs and give to Yağmur, just to make it stop, just to make her okay again 😭😭😭

When Naz tried to tell Akgün about Yağmur and what she had been through, Akgün didn't want to hear it. Because he couldn't bear it. But in the end he was forced to witness Yağmur's breakdown. The first one of many others to come. And when they come, he won't be able to stay away any longer.

Yağmur

Yağmur's journey this season is all about healing and acceptance. She has to live through those 5 stages of grief. Just like Meredith Grey once said: "There are five stages of grief. They look different on all of us. But there are always five". And I already said in my episode 22 review that Yağmur locked herself in denial. Naz in her conversation with Akgün confirmed it. But ever since Akgün showed up in the restaurant, it's like the floodgates of Yağmur's grief have been open. She started spiralling, diving head first into anger. All her anger was directed at Akgün. And even though Yağmur came to visit Akgün in prison to say that she was no longer angry with him, her biting words, the "I don't love you anymore" and the following panick attack - all of that only proves that she's still just as angry with him as she was, simply because she's still very much in love with him.

I think Yağmur's bargaining stage of grief revealed itself with Naz, when Yağmur went to the hotel to bring Naz home. In Yağmur's head there is this idea that she has to protect Naz, she's convinced that she can save her cousin from suffering Canan's fate. But Naz refused to go with Yağmur, therefore making Yağmur feel helpless and maybe even abandoned. Already in this fragile and vulnerable state, Yağmur completely lost it after having heard gunshots. She finally started accepting that something's wrong. And it's so important that, when she finally said the words "I don't recognize myself anymore", Akgün was the one she said those words to. It's like she had been waiting for him all this time. Naz told Akgün that Yağmur needed someone to tell her what had happened to her. Akgün's that someone. Only with Akgün back in her life, Yağmur will finally accept her mother's death and then start moving on.

Selim

I don't have much to say about Selim in episode 23 other than a string of curses 🤬🤬🤬.

I've never loved this character and barely even liked him. Canan made him bearable and with her gone... Well, we've got what we saw in the last episode. I wonder how he was never kicked out of his job. Not only was he completely unhinged but also absolutely stupid and unprofessional during that mission with Sare. Then him forcing Akgün to choose between himself and Soner. And of course him storming into Yağmur and Emel's house, yelling and demanding to see Naz. Mister, it's not your place to demand anything, let alone act all righteous and question Emel as a mother. I swear, I wanted to rip his tongue out 😠😡😤

That's pretty much all I have to say about Selim in the last episode. Well, I've got more to say but I don't see it moving forward without me spitting profanities and turning violent.

A few honourable mentions:

🖤 Naz and her attempt to talk to Akgün about Yağmur.

🖤 Sare was kinda funny and she deserved a cookie for putting up with Selim. Glad they didn't make her stupid and she figured out that she was being followed.

🖤 Cihan trying to help Yağmur with her panick attack was very sweet. It was a nice first meeting. Although him being her secret admirer is kinda creepy and makes zero sense for now. I really hope they're going to show how it all started. Speaking of Cihan. I'm kinda conflicted about him. On the one hand, he's sweet and gentle with Yağmur, pretty hot when he was speaking German but also cunning and cold-blooded when he tipped off the Mertoğlu about Soner's whereabouts. And in episode 24 he's going to team up with Akgün to avenge Soner?🤔 Damn, the guy's making my head spin.

And that's pretty much it. Görüşürüz!

[volleyball-dontknowher]

Everyone else + One direction songs as boyfriends

Okay so this is a part 2 to literally the second work I had posted to tumblr and that’s linked right below here (you’re welcome, I scrolled through 440 posts to find it) 

Karasuno Boys as boyfriends based on One Direction songs 

It is super cute and it includes

Oikawa, Iwa, Bokuto, Akaashi, Kuroo, Kenma, Ushijima and Tendou 

Oikawa

One Thing

This is one of my favorite songs and it fits oikawa so well because he is so confident in himself and he knows how hot he is and expects people to fall for him so when he fell head over heels with you he was so shocked and it was all that he could think of over and over. He started by doing that asshole smirk and flirting that got him all of the girls but you were different and he worked so hard to get you like he could not let you reject him. (Not in a creepy way like you definitely have the choice to but he knows that his typical douchy ways deserve to be rejected and you are too good for that anyway so he needs to do something better) Turns out he does and asks you out in the cutest way with a rose and some really cute compliments and he is so blush and shy that he stutters through it but that’s totally okay because you say yes. He is totally obsessed with you like he is always checking in on you and trying to make himself better for you but still snaps on accident and stuff because he isn’t used to being actually vulnerable with people and he knows that won’t get away with you. Every time he sees you his eyes light up and he will say something sarcastic but then pull you into the sweetest heart filling hug ever that really shows you how much he loves you even though outsiders really might not see it.

Iwa

What Makes you beautiful

Iwa was so sick of telling girls that he did’nt know where Oikawa had gone that he automatically dismissed you when you approached him but when you said that you needed to give the paper to him he was so shocked that he had been so rude and had to take a step back, even worse you were absolutely gorgeous but so shy. He is the boyfriend that is really nervous to do things because he doesn’t know girls but he knows girls way better than he thinks because when he texts oikawa and he gets a dumb answer from him he knows but himself that it is a dumb answer and that he should not try and carry you places because you wouldnt like that. You take turns planning dates and choosing where to go but it is never an argument and he is a total gentleman like classic gentlemen, the whole opening doors for you, meeting your parents first and everything like he cares so much about what you think about him because he just thinks you’re amazing and he just finds himself looking at you and just high five-ing himself mentally. He dishes out his fare share of sarcasm but always with love like you’ll ask if he wants to hangout later and he tells you no, like flat out no and of course you get sad about it all until you realize that he wants to hangout now and literally was walking the way back to your house with you and you didn’t realize because you were sniffling and being dramatic.

Kuroo

Live while we’re young

Kuroo is such a worry wart like he wants you to be happy all the time and whenever he messes up he doesn’t know what to do like he is just so obsessed with you. He comes with his own warning label because he is going to be absolutely wild. He tells you that he has an idea and twenty minutes later you two are going cliff diving or going three towns over to try some new restaurant. He is the one for you. Everything seems spontaneous with him but he really wants to just surprise you because he loves your smile and how you get so shocked, secretly he looks for things to go take you to do that you haven’t done before because he likes being the person with yo for all of these firsts in your life and he hopes one day he can be that person forever. He would literally never put this much effort into things if he didn’t love you with his whole entire heart and whenever you are out on these dates or going somewhere he always does the cliche thing where he looks down at you and is like “hey, I love you, you know that right?”. The smile when you get when you go out together is the smile he secretly gets when he thinks about you. He also gets really sappy and sentimental but would never let you know that.

Kenma

Night Changes

🥺 This one makes me a little emotional because I see the two of you dating after being friends for a while first like he just one day sees you in a different light and just can’t help but ask you out on the spot and little does he know you’ve liked him forever. It was such a spur of the moment thing but he couldn’t imagine anything else and just the idea of things changing so quickly and you dating someone else just made him blurt it out. It’s a nervous relationship for the both of you because you haven’t dated very many people yet and you want things to be ‘right’ like they are in all of the shows and stuff but your relationship is different. It’s less big surprises and actions and more listening and nights in and small things together. Kenma shows his love in so many different ways that are so uniquely him, he likes to bring you with him places, or have you by his side and even asking if you need anything like he does little things for you or sees things and thinks of you in public and sends them to you. It’s nothing huge but he makes sure to make you smile and that you know he’s thinking about you at least everyday. It takes forever to tell each other that you love them but when it finally happened it was just right like no other word but right. He changes his phone background to a dumb picture of you and just adores you so much like you get to see his little smile more than anyone else ever.

Bokuto  

One Way or Another

Boy if this isn’t the two of you I don’t have any idea what it would be. The two of you are chaotic and fun with each other and are always supporting each other but he also does weird shit too like the first time he comes over he definitely walks by like four times to make sure it is actually your house (he has picked you up from here before and knows it is your house but he still is nervous okay). Once the two of you are dating more he gets so clingy that he will pull a Twilight and crawl through your window just to sleep next to you and then he will parkour jump out the window in the morning so the two of you don’t get caught. He is also really really loud when he introduces you as his girlfriend because he is so happy and excited that he could just scream it to the world in fact he has just screamed it to the world before because he just is so excited and loves you. He always finds a way to make things work, one way or another, like when he starts training more for nationals he comes and sees you wayyyy early in the morning or will carry your bag for you between classes because he wants to show you that he cares every single day. He’s forgetful but he tries really really hard so you can’t even get mad at him for forgetting things like anniversaries because he treats you like everyday is special together.

Akaashi

Drag Me Down

Akaashi has always been so level headed but talking to you like he has no thoughts in his head and he hates it. YOu are just so perfect and he tells you all of the things he loves about you in such little ways like you’ll be doing things and he will just randomly compliment something about you, he is so good about knowing what you’re insecure about and literally complimenting it away like you have no idea how but you’ll be nervous about wearing a crop top or something and he sees you and immediately just tells you how beautiful you look in it. And when you do the same to him he always tells you something dumb like “i know” but really does take all of your compliments to heart and just thinks about I forever like you really called him pretty and told him that his eyes were beautiful like he gets so happy like no one ever compliments him He is so caring and listens to every single word you say and always knows how to make you feel better even if you don’t like he’s learned that when you’re so stressed you end up crying you need a snack, a walk and then to go to bed and it always helps so much. He is your rock and you are his like you two are so strong and as long as you have each other no one can drag you down.

Ushijima

They don’t know about us

DUDE this is 100000% your sons because like the two of you just have such an unexpected relationship and everyone just makes assumptions about it and things about your relationship but they have no idea how sweet his is behind closed doors and how he never forgets anniversaries or anything and knows you better than you know yourself. But what is super annoying is when people tell you that he is more into volleyball than you and that you are going to just hold his career back and you can’t even understand why because those are two separate things and he wants to do it forever. In public he is typical Toshi but that’s who you fell in love with so that’s okay. But as your relationship gets stronger he slowly starts showing more affection but like how he has seen in movies so first it is holding your hand, then kissing the back of it as you walk and you have to tell him that it’s sweet but he is perfect the way he is and he doesn’t need to change or be someone he’s not. Besides he is a big touch deprived baby and he is super affectionate when you’re alone like kisses and cuddles and just constantly has some part of him touching some part of you like it could just be your legs laying over his lap as you watch something but it is something and he finds himself mindlessly doing the same.

Tendou

Best song ever

Tendou is such a happy go lucky guy and the most positive boyfriend ever like he sees you one day in the hall and just was like “yep, she’s the one” and no one believed him and he was actually serious. He asked you out without even getting to know you first at all and saying yes was the best thing ever. He is the let's go get McDonald’s and ride in circles kind of boyfriend where dates are so frequent and most people don’t call them dates but it is so fun just being with you too. He always surprises you and dresses nice and takes you out somewhere nice for anniversaries and holidays and stuff but that’s not who you fell in love with. You fell in love with the dork who takes you to Walmart with him to get things to try and home make some crazy recipe he found on the internet. Or you two just laying together watching TikTok with each other just laying around together, when you two hangout you have more fun with no plans. But do not get me wrong he is going to show you he cares and makes sure you feel his and he surprises you a lot and stuff but he doesn’t care about the superficial things. He buys you both so much food but he doesn’t count that as actually getting you things, he gets the most thoughtful and kind gifts ever like he will keep secrets from you for weeks so he can get it right.

[themonkeycabal]

The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, ep 3

Good morning!

Spoilers! of course

Previously on:

The new Captain America is a massive tool, but his buddy, "Battlestar" (lol), is a little bit adorable. They work for something called the Global Repatriation Council, which sounds like a bureaucratic delight and joy.

Bucky got arrested for skipping his therapy appointment to go to Germany (nothing good ever happens to you in Germany, Bucky. Stop going to Germany.) on a mission with Sam (the mission went badly). And once he's sprung from the clink, he and Sam are suckered into the most awkward team therapy session in many an age. Things Are Said and everybody ends up mostly feeling pretty bad about everything.

Speaking of feeling pretty bad about everything — we discover there was a black super soldier in the US Army during the Korean war who was repaid for his service by being imprisoned and made a lab rat for thirty years. Just as awful as it sounds.  

Also our pseudo-terrorists from the first episode turn out to be a pack of idealistic kids who grew up in a blipped world and whose goals are probably as murky to them as they are to me. They, however, have pissed off somebody much bigger and badder (probably by stealing super soldier serum). 

To find just what in the sam hill was going on with the super soldier serum being out in the wild, Bucky suggested they go talk to that very stable and rational repository of Hydra knowledge, Zemo. I'm sure this will go swimmingly.

I've got my chips and guac and beer, it's 12:30 a.m., and I'm ready for some good ol' fashioned fisticuffs! Bring it, Marvel,

And we open with a sunny, smiley propaganda ad for the Global Repatriation Council. Helping you get back to the way things used to be. Reset. Restore. Rebuild. Cut to a shady black police van with the GRC logo and militarized police hop out along with Captain Massive Tool and the shield that really shouldn't be his. They seem nice.

"Don't give them a second to delete, shred, or breathe," says Captain Biggest Bestest Hero Ever as they prepare to breach a graffiti covered building. Ah, it's the hideout in Munich where Karli and the flag stompers gang were bunked last episode. The owner refuses to give up any info, calls them brutes, spits in Captain Tool's face, and Captain Biggest Bestest Hero Ever roughs him up and yells "Do you know who I am?" The owner replies for us all, "yes, I do, and I don't care."

Captain Tool leaves and grumbles about not having intel on that super dangerous criminal 12-year old, Karli. Battlestar (lol) points out she's giving shelter and meds to displaced people, and so they're loyal. And I'm just going to let that go at this point, because last ep she was on about how the GRC only cared about helping the returning people and not the people who were there all along, and the Flag Smashers wanted to return the world to how it was during the blip. But now suddenly they're all about helping the displaced, who I thought were the ones who were gone, thus, you know, being displaced when they come back to a world that's moved on without them. And I'm letting it go …. now.

Or not. I mean, I guess we could say that they're helping the displaced the GRC doesn't want to help, because they're not politically useful or the GRC is funneling its massive resources somewhere else. Or … something. Like I said, it's all very murky at the moment. I could keep watching and probably discover the answer. And I'm sure the GRC is corrupt as hell, so you go Karli! Though, she's like 16 (okay, maybe early 20s), and I'm not sure how she's managed this level of pull and resources in the few months since the great Un-Blippening and also she's got like a team of 8 (or 7, one died last ep) and she's not exactly oozing charisma. But, never mind. Moving on. For real this time.

That's all my way of saying that 3:48 into this episode and I'm already super done with Captain Massive Tool.

In Berlin, Bucky and Sam are visiting Zemo in prison. How'd they get permission? The guard seems very chill about them being there, he even leaves so Bucky and Sam can go to Zemo's cell alone. Which is so very weird. Are they hoping somebody will shank the weirdo who sits in his cell listening to opera and playing chess all day? "Oh no, he's dead, how sad. Heinrich! Get the mop!"

Anyway, Bucky says he'll go in alone, because Sam's an Avenger and Zemo doesn't really have warm fuzzy feelings for Avengers. Sam, who is currently in possession of the duo's one (1) brain cell, remembers how Zemo literally stalked Bucky and tried to frame him for a bombing and mass murder. "He was obsessed with Hydra. We have a history together," is Bucky's very questionable counter-argument. Well, I mean, technically yes, I guess.

Seriously, they just let him walk right in. Wow.

Zemo steps out of the improbably dark recesses of his cell and immediately starts reciting the Winter Soldier control words. "I just wanted to see how the new you reacts to the old words." By staring. It's his thing.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry. It was never personal." I don't know why, but this made me laugh. His delivery is great. It's just like "hey man, good to see you again, hope you got past that whole framing you for murder and the global manhunt thing. Sorry and all. I just really hated your BFF for that time he dropped a city on my family. Bygones, amiright?"

Bucky skips the chat. "Somebody recreated the super soldier serum. I need to find out who." Ah, Zemo is super interested. But, of course. He killed all the other Soldiers, he wouldn't be keen on others around, would he?

Zemo knows where to begin looking for the answer. Cut to Sam and Bucky walking around in a dark room full of some sort of vague equipment (ah, it's a garage), Sam regretting every life decision he's ever made that led him to this point "what are you talking about you want to break Zemo out of jail? Where the hell are we? Buck, have you lost your mind?" Stupidity, who knows, and yes.

"Zemo's going to mess with our minds. Especially yours. No offense." "Offense." lol idiots.

Bucky finds the lights. They argue some more about Zemo. "Super soldiers go against everything he believes in. He is crazy, but he still has a code." Sam's like, yeah, I saw his code, it was blow shit up and kill a lot of people. Sam cannot believe he is hearing this crap right now and he's got to be like "steve rogers, if you weren't 106 I would beat your ass for leaving me with this moron".

"Let me just walk you through a hypothetical. Can I walk you through a hypothetical?" Sam, feeling those cold, tingly chills, the slowly creeping horror of realization, "What did you do?" "I didn't do anything," Bucky lies like the terrible liar he is. Wow he's a bad liar.

Cut back to Zemo's prison cell. Zemo ticks another off the "creepy euro villain" checklist, when Bucky randomly asks what he's reading and Zemo says Machiavelli. But of course. He's hiding something in his book. A key card.

Meanwhile, in the garage Bucky is explaining things to Sam. "The weakest point of any system isn't the software, or the hardware, it's the meatware." lol elegantly put, Bucky. "The human element."

Anyway, to sum up, Bucky's already broken Zemo out of prison. Poor Sam, the look on his face as Bucky hypotheticals through all the steps of the breakout, I laughed so hard.

Sam: “i hate everything, especially this asshole”

"And where are we?" Sam asks, very fed up with Things. 

The door opens and here comes Zemo in his purloined guard's uniform.

"You're going back to prison!" "We need him, Sam." Zemo, politely, "If I may—" "NO!" "NO!"

Argue argue argue. Bucky makes a weird pitch about how Steve didn't sign the Sokovia Accords and neither did Sam and, they went all illegal and on the run, they did it for him and so he's asking Sam to do that again. I mean, Sam's still slightly cheesed about that, Bucky. But, it seems to work, and Sam agrees with A Great Deal Of Reluctance.

Zemo's just standing there all quiet and well-mannered as they go through this, like he's their little pet whackjob.

The garage is full of classic cars belonging to Zemo and they're full of weapons and other goodies. He says he spent years tracking down all the Hydra people who might know how to make the serum, because if it's out there, then somebody could create an army of people like the Avengers. He's taking clothes out of one of the cars and finds a purple ski mask, which he stealthily slips into a bag. Nobody cares about your weird purple mask, Zemo, I've thought that thing was dumb for 30 years.

"To do this, we'll have to scale a ladder of low-lifes." heh

Next they go to an airfield. In Germany. You guys, come on.

Anyway, Zemo owns a plane, he's rich, his family was royalty, he's a baron. Sam's like 'wtf?' Bucky just rolls with everything. Or he does until they're on the plane later and Zemo has somehow lifted Bucky's book of amends and decides to read through it. "Who is Nakajima?" And Bucky's got him by the throat.

Sam's all hey that's Steve's book. "I told him about Trouble Man, he wrote it in that book. Did you hear it? What did you think?" "I like 40s music, so…" "You didn't like it?!?!?!?!" "I liked it." Zemo chimes in, "It is a masterpiece, James. Complete, comprehensive. It captures the African-American experience." lol wtf

"Everybody loves Marvin Gaye," Sam is so offended. "I like Marvin Gaye," Bucky says, probably trying to remember 'who is Marvin Gaye?' "Steve *adored* Marivn Gaye," Sam insists. lol. I like Marvin Gaye, Sam.

Zemo starts going off about Steve, and how the danger with those heroes and super soldiers is they're put on a pedestal and we forget about their flaws. And while he's not wrong, he also clearly wants Sam to throw him out of that airplane.

"Do we want to live in a world with people like the Red Skull? No. That is why we're going to Madripoor." Ahh Madripoor, I haven't thought about that place in a long, long time. A wretched hive of scum and villainy, iirc. Ah, yes, Zemo and Bucky confirm.

Zemo says they can't go as themselves and Bucky's going to have to "become someone you claim is gone". Bucky looks Deeply Unhappy.

On to a GRC resettlement camp in Latvia. Karli is playing soccer with some young kids. Because of the good-natured idealism. She's summoned to a hospital bed, in a ward stuffed with beds in an old, fancy building that's seen better days. Somebody is dying and she's crying at their bedside. Her mom maybe?

Back to Madripoor. It's a glittering city of colorfully-lit skyscrapers. The trio are walking across a bridge to give us a picturesque view and exposit about what they'll be doing. Sam is wearing a very questionable suit with like a black and red floral pattern and yellow-green circles. Or something. I can't tell what's going on with that thing. He says he looks like a pimp. Well no, but it is a terrible suit. Zemo calls it fashion forward, but Zemo wears a great coat with a fur collar and a purple ski mask. Don't take fashion tips from Zemo.

He says Sam will play a "sophisticated, charming, African rake, named Conrad Mack. Aka the Smiling Tiger." Sam is still not thrilled, "even has a bad nickname." Though, yes, the original dude does dress that poorly and he looks like Sam, so suck it up, Sam.

Fortunately they don't have to walk all the way across the bridge (it is a long ass bridge), they're met by a car about halfway and Zemo says they have to super duper stay in character no matter what happens.

The car is surrounded by elaborately decorated motorcycles ridden by very armed people. Hell of a welcome wagon. They're escorted to a graffitied, crumbling underpass, presumably the entrance to Low Town. It's part Macao, part Kowloon, part Jakarta, crammed full of neon and people and ramshackle buildings piled together in a maze of narrow streets, rails, and weird building-to-building bridges. Good set design.

Everybody is "fashion forward" and very heavily armed. They pass a wall with the words "Power Broker Is Watching". That's the charming fellow Karli and her do-gooders stole from.

They enter a bar decorated with golden baboon skulls and koi fish. Zemo asks "are you ready to comply, Winter Soldier?" he's attracted attention from unsavory sorts. I mean, more unsavory than the already unsavory sorts who fill the bar. The bartender is surprised to see Zemo and the Smiling Tiger. Zemo asks for Selby.

Somebody at a nearby table pulls a hood over her head, and by somebody I mean Sharon Carter. NOT SUBTLE SHARON!

Bartender asks the Smiling Tiger if he wants the usual and Sam silently nods. The bartender seems suspicious, but he takes a pickled snake out of a jar, cuts something out of it, drops it in a glass and places it in front of Sam who's like 'what in the actual I am going to puke'. lol Sam bravely tosses it back and does not puke no matter how much he really wants to and he really wants to. Bucky's being the Winter Soldier and is not at all laughing in his head about this.

A power broker minion comes over and tells Zemo he's not welcome there. Zemo says if PB wants him to leave, he can talk to him himself or bring Selby. The minion looks at Bucky and asks if he got a new haircut. Bucky gives him pure murder face. So the Power Broker and his minions know the Winter Soldier, so they were Hydra? Or, I guess, they all ran in the same shady circles.

Anyway, PUNCHING AT LAST! Power Broker minions approach to remove Zemo and Zemo tells the Winter Soldier to attack. Bucky is not pleased, but I am, because now there's punching. It's just been the sort of week that needs punching to improve it. Bar brawl! It's a lopsided fight, Bucky's wiping the floor with these dudes and the suspicious bartender is moving away to make a call.

"It didn't take much for him to fall back into form," Zemo tells Sam. Shut your pie hole, Zemo.  Aw, now the guns come out and the fight's over. Zemo calls off the Winter Soldier and the bartender tells them Selby will see them.

Selby is lounging in her backroom, listening to 50s french pop, and hanging out with lizards and piles of cash. As you do. She'd like to know why Zemo is there and by the way wasn't he in prison? She makes a weird purring sound at Sam. lol. I like her. The actress looks familiar but I can't place her. Anyway.

Zemo says if she tells them what she knows about the super soldier serum, he'll give her the Winter Soldier and his control words. Then Zemo weirdly fondles Bucky's face and like rubs at the cleft in his chin. lol. fucking weirdo.

Selby is charmed. She says she's glad she didn't kill him straight away. Weirdos of a feather, I suppose. Anyway, she says the serum is in Madripoor and developed by Dr. Wilfred Nagel. He was working for the PB. She won't give up Nagel's location for free, though. …and Sam's phone rings. Pro tip, Sam: turn off your phone when you go into meetings with deeply shady crime bosses.

Everybody stops and stares at him and he just sort of lets it ring. It's his sister. Dude, just turn it off. Too late. Selby wants him to answer it on speaker. Okay, well, she'll kill you either way, so just refuse the call and get ready for punching and running. So, he answers it.

Sarah says she needs to talk to him about the situation and he wants her to say exactly what situation. So, she says the one with the boat, dummy, and are you high? So he's going to play this off as a Doing Crime phone call. And it kind of works until Sarah calls him Sam. Selby's like wtf kill them and then she gets shot in the chest by … I don't know who? somebody from the outside. Now this trio of geniuses is going to get blamed for it. Immediately a bounty for them goes out to like everybody in Low Town. lol. That went well, guys.

And the shooting starts, they run. Except not so great for Sam who we just discovered is wearing heels. "I can't run in these heels!"

Here come the bikers. And they get picked off by somebody in a nearby warehouse. Oh, is that Sharon? Yep. And she's salty .When asked what she's doing there, "I stole Steve's shield, remember? I also took the wings for your ass so you (sam) could save his ass (bucky) from his ass (zemo)." lol. She didn't have any backup so she's off the grid in Madripoor. Did nobody think to clear her after everybody was all heroic and then pardoned after the Un-Snappening? Come on, guys.

She's better than they deserve and despite being bitter, she says she's got a place in High Town they can hide.

Sharon runs a gallery selling stolen masterpieces and other hot craft goodies. The creators of this show bless us with a long shirtless Sam scene as he changes out of this Smiling Tiger duds and apologizes to Sharon. She says she'd be arrested if she went back to the States and Madripoor doesn't allow extradition. Besides, she muses, heroing is hypocritical bullshit. Right Sam, since you gave up the shield and all. And Sam's all "bwhu?"

Then she turns her bitter on Bucky and asks how the new Cap is and Bucky's like "i hate him the most" and she's all 'come on', she knows he buys into all that heroic bullshit, "before you were his (zemo) pet psychopath you were Mr America, Cap's best friend." Well, no before that he was the Winter Soldier long before Zemo.

"Wow, she's kind of awful now," Bucky tells Sam. lol. You really get a sense of how much Bucky lucked out with his goat farm. Thanks Wakanda!

Sam gets them back to the point and wants to know where Nagel is, though Sharon says they should stay out of it to be safe. Sam presses, he says he can help clear Sharon's name and she's like 'wow, bargaining with my life?' but he gives her a Cap-worth speech about trying. "They cleared the bionic staring machine and he's killed almost everybody he's met." "I heard that," Bucky says from ten feet away. "I don't trust charity." You just tried to guilt him about bargaining with your life, Sharon!

Anyway, they strike a deal.

Zemo's being suspiciously quiet.

Then they go to a rave. Madripoor is party central. Sharon's gallery is hosting a party for clients and whatnot. She'll see what she can find. For some reason she invites the boys to join her at the party because hiding from the bounty on them and probably also from the Power Broker means walking into parties packed full of the sort of people who buy expensive stolen goods in Madripoor, like say, the Power Broker or his wealthier minions.

Zemo's just happy to be out of prison. The shot of him dancing. lol.

Sharon finds a lead on Nagel and the next day this quartet of galaxy brains heads to the docks. Nothing bad ever happens when you go look for scientists at the docks. No sir. And he is apparently hanging out in a shipping container. Sharon's like hurry up you've got a bounty on your heads and I'm sick of you three already.

The container is empty, but Sharon insists it's the right one. Zemo goes in and finds the false back which leads to a set of stairs going up. "Comin' Home Baby" is playing in the distance. I know I always listen to Mel Torme when I'm tinkering on gene-altering serums in my secret shipping container lab.

They find Dr. Nagel, who is not keen on chatting but he's willing to maybe listen to offers. He's definitely the mad scientist type.

Sharon, keeping watch outside, spots trouble. Some bad guys heading towards the container. She attacks! Moar punchies! Or beating the shit out of people with a baton. It's eleventy zillion bounty hunters. How did they find them? Did that Very Wanted Trio maybe go to a very popular party the night before, or something?

Bucky attempts to persuade Nagel with his gun. Nagel says he was brought in to Hydra to work on the Winter Soldier program. Then he was recruited by the CIA. They had blood samples of a subject (Isaiah? the black super soldier from last ep), and he was able to recreate the serum off of that. "I was a god! I did what no other scientist since Erskine was able to do."

Zemo is pacing around like a very, very angry psycho about to shoot the mad scientist. Guys, maybe it wasn't a good idea to bring Zemo to the person who could create the super soldier serum, given that is the opposite of what he wants. Kill Nagel, no more super soldiers. This is gonna end bloody. Zemo seems to have found a gun hidden in the lab. Yep.

"How have we never heard about this?" Sam asks. Well Sam, it turns out Nagel was blipped. Thanks, Thanos! Anyway, when he came back the CIA project was abandoned but the Power Broker was happy to help fund him. He made 20 vials and Karli stole those. And then Karli being a super duper genius, called him a few days earlier and asked if he could help somebody dying of tuberculosis. Karli … don't call the bad guys and ask for help after you stole from them. That's like day one stuff, kiddo.

Meanwhile, Sharon is still fighting every bounty hunter in Madripoor. She's killed like twenty guys.

Sharon runs in "guys we're seriously out of time" and Zemo takes the distraction to shoot Nagel. Who didn't see that coming? Oh yeah, Sam and Bucky and Sharon. Nobody was using the one (1) brain cell today. Or Zemo was. That's what you get for loaning it to the lunatic.

And then somebody fires a freaking rocket at the shipping container lab. Man. But, can you collect a bounty if all that's left are unidentifiable, charred corpses? Nobody in Madripoor is using the brain cell today.

Now they're trapped in a burning lab that's full of probably very bad explosive chemicals and o2 tanks. And yep, it partially blows up. Zemo gets away. Or seems to have, anyway. It's a gun battle now and also arguing. lol. Sharon's like "FOR REAL YOU IDIOTS?"

Oh, here comes Zemo, stomping along the top of a shipping container, carrying his purple ski mask. He fires at a gas line, the explosion distracting the bounty hunters and giving the trio time to run. Zemo beats up some bounty hunters and then finds a convertible muscle car in a container and swings by to pick up the others. Sam is very grumpy "you're going back to jail". lol.

Sharon's like 'okay, buh-bye!', she's had enough. Aww, is she really only in one episode? Well, Sam does promise to try and get her that pardon, so …

Anyway, Bucky calls shotgun and refuses to move the seat up for Sam. Payback is sweet. Heh.

Oh, not done with Sharon yet. She meets a minion and says they've got a couple of big problems.

Lithuania. Karli and one of her pals are stalking a GRC depot. Karli's sad. Her buddy says she should take some time to mourn. But, no, she's got do-gooding to do. They chat for a bit about what they'd be doing if they weren't do-goodering. She'd be a teacher or some such. They were all in Madripoor, washed up there during the blip, put then put out when everybody returned. Hmm. Lots of expositioning. Blah blah, scary taking the serum. "But it was worth it, because this world is ours." And they're going to give it to the kids in the displacement camps. … alrighty then.

Anyway, she's convinced that now that Nagel is dead, the Power Broker will come to her begging for the rest of the serum. No, sweety, I really don't think a person like that begs. Yikes.

"So we've got the one fight ahead of us then? I'll take those odds," says her very dim buddy.

In the prison in Berlin, Captain Massive Tool is talking to the guards about how Sam and Bucky where there when Zemo escaped and the guard's all "you … you don't think they had something to do with him getting out…." World class security. I find it really grating that Captain Tool calls Sam and Bucky by their first names. It's just so weirdly familiar that it almost crosses into dismissive. Completely unearned familiarity.

Lemar says they can't just accuse Sam and Bucky without evidence, but Captain Tool seems to think they can just, you know, make it up or some shit. "If we get the job done, do you think they're going to sweat us on the how?" Fuck you, Captain Tool.

Back in Zemo's plane, Bucky's fastidiously cleaning his metal arm, like a big grumpy cat. And Sam is trying to get a lead on the person (Madani) Nagel told him Karli wanted to help. He's got Torres on it.

They get to talking about the shield and how many people died or got messed up because of it/the serum. Sam says he made a mistake giving it up and he should have destroyed it. Bucky says, "Look that shield represents a lot of things to a lot of people, including me. The world is upside down, we need a new Cap, and it ain't gonna be Walker [preach]. So before you destroy it, I'll take it from him myself." Kick his ass, Bucky!

Torres gets back to Sam just as Zemo brings them lunch. Such a good host. "They found Madani. Dead. She died in Riga, a city near the Baltic Sea." … was that last bit really necessary? Like Riga is such a mystery? Even if you don't know where it is, like, that's so weirdly clunky. Somehow I think if you don't know Riga, you probably don't have the Baltic in the map in your head, either.  'Have you ever been to London? A city on the River Thames.' 'I've always wanted to go to Los Angeles, a city near the Pacific Ocean.'

Bucky should have said "oh yeah, i love Riga. I killed a diplomat there back in '64. Great beer."

Zemo's got a place they can go and he's looking forward "to coming face to face with Karli." Not creepy at all, Zemo. Nope.

Meanwhile, the kids are raiding the GRC depot and chatting way too much and calling each other by name. Oh dear.

"Filthy Flag Smashers" grumps a soldier tied up on the floor. I can't take them at all seriously with a name like that. Karli says they had six months of supplies just sitting there. "Don't you understand, we're fighting for our lives." Are you? Why and in what way?

Okay, so this is my continuing issue here. They're trying to build up this un-Blipped world, which is great, but they're doing it through So Much Exposition and so much of it is vague. We're supposed to think the GRC are probably shady, but are they? I don't know. Could be. They're sitting on these supplies! Evil! Maybe they are, but why? Why stockpile all that? Is it being sold on a black market? Or diverted to other people? Who knows! I don't. You don't.

We're supposed to sympathize with the Flag Munchers, but they're so vague in their goals. They want the world back how it was during the Blip. Okay. How was it? I don't know. What was so great about it? What we saw in Endgame didn't look all that great. But, we saw it from a different point of view, to be sure. So, what was it like for the average person who survived? Hell if I know. Also the Munchers want to help the people in the displacement camps. Okay. So do those two goals go together? I don't know. Are all the displacement camps bad? We're meant to think so, but I don't know. Is it just some of them? Is it regional? Who, exactly, are the displaced? It seems to be a mix of those who were blipped and those who weren't. I guess. I don't know.

It's just all taken out of the Big Book Of Cliched Assumptions for Lazy Worldbuilding. Why actually do the hard work of details, when they can just fall back on tropes, make vague pronouncements about how 'bad' things are, and let us assume the answers. This might bother me less if we didn't have to spend so much time with Captain Tool and the Flag Munchers. I cannot tell you how much I currently don't care. I find this all very frustrating. I don't mean to spoil the fun. Let me look at Sam's face again:

That was better. But, I stopped too soon. We're still with the Munchers. 

They're leaving the building they just looted, and there’s a bit of business I don’t care about, involving Karli’s car and how she’s not taking it, she’s going to just leave it parked, completely unsuspiciously in front of the building. And, she’s going to ride with her pal Mr. Dimbulb. 

She tells him to put his seatbelt on and she's very insistent. And then her car blows up and the building catches fire and it’s very dramatic. 

Her buddy's like wtf there were people in there and Karli says, "This is the only language these people understand." ARGH. Who people? Why is bombing them the only language they understand? Like, in this show, the GRC have literally DONE NOTHING. Nothing we’ve seen and nothing we’ve heard. At least have people chat about dark and dire rumors or something. Hell, they haven’t even been accused of doing anything other than ‘caring more about the people who returned than the ones who never left’ which is literally their job. sighing all night long. Maybe they’re horrible and evil and the Worst Thing Ever. But I DON’T KNOW THAT, because nothing in the show has bothered to establish that. 

ANYWAY

Riga, a city on the Baltic Sea

The trio are walking down the street, Zemo expositing for us again. Sokovia was apparently swallowed by neighboring countries, erased from the map. "I don't suppose any of you bothered visiting the memorial? Of course not. Why would you?"

Bucky's looking not happy. Probably remembering '64. They get to Zemo's place and Bucky says he's going to go on a walk. Zemo and Sam go on ahead and Bucky watches until they're out of sight and he circles back and finds a beeping thingy on the ground. He notices something across the street. Ah another round beepy thing. Now he's collecting them. He steps into an alley and says, "You dropped something". Nobody immediately appears.

"I was wondering when you were going to show up." And he turns around and it's one of the Dora Milaje. She looks unhappy and she’d like to know where Zemo is. Yeah, the Wakandans are not just gonna let Zemo wander free. That's a sticky situation you got yourself in, White Wolf.

Credits.

Well, I really enjoyed the bits that didn't contain the Flag Munchers or Captain Tool. Do better with your world-building, people.

[takerfoxx]

Here's the next part of the Walpurgis Nights girls watch The Rebellion Story, this time stretching from that upside-down reflection conversation to Homura and Kyoko's wacky bus trip.

Reminder:

G=Gretchen

H=Homulilly

Op=Ophelia

Ok=Oktavia

Ca=Candeloro/Mami

Ch=Charlotte

...

Ca: Okay, so, is everyone ready?

Ch: Yeah. Yeah. Sorry about losing my shit. I’ll try to keep it together.

Op: No, by all means. I’d say you’re entitled.

G: I mean, if I found out that I was a tiny, living doll that turned into a giant worm, I’d be upset too!

=Charlotte sighs deeply=

G: Oh. Sorry.

H: It’s a fake.

G: Eh?

H: All of it. The whole scenario. We’re caught in a super-witch’s labyrinth, or some kind of virtual reality simulation, or a shared dream.

Ok: Like the Matrix?

H: The what?

Ok: Oh, I’ve got to show that one to you. It’s this old movie from the world of the living about how all of humanity are trapped in this virtual world because machines have taken over the planet, and they use people’s bodies as living batteries or something. And-

Op: Tavi, starting to ramble.

Ok: Sorry. Anyway, there’s like three different recreations out there. Personally I like the one from Madd Dogg Studios the best.

Op: Because of all the sex.

Ok: Yeah, the other two don’t have those. Shame, really.

Ch: Okay, hold on though! If all that is some kind of weird simulation, then why am I there? By rights if you guys never turned into witches, I should be dead! You should’ve killed me, and then I would be comfortably here in Freehaven while you guys sit around singing songs to severed heads inside of demented teddy-bears!

G: Well, if there’s no witches in this world, then maybe we never fought you in the first place.

Ch: But I’m clearly a witch!

G: Yeah, that is weird.

Ca: Let’s find out.

…

Ok: You think that all of this being in an upside-down reflection means anything?

H: Yes. That it’s a fake.

Op: You are not going to let that go, are you?

H: Just watch.

Op: Have you seen this before?

H: Obviously not.

Ok: Well, this version of Candeloro is just as on it with her tea game, I see.

Ca: Some things never change.

Ok: Like Ophelia’s dislike for sour stuff, apparently.

Ca: It’s her tradeoff for her ungodly tolerance for spicy.

Ch: Yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s not as high as she makes it out to be.

Op: Hey, who exactly ate those dockengaut viper peppers without flinching? Me, that’s who!

Ch: You literally had to the hospital and grow your tongue back.

Op: But I didn’t flinch.

…

Ok: They really like showing us around the town.

G: Do any of these locations mean anything?

Ca: Well, that’s the school, so I suppose-Huh?

G: UM!

Ok: Why is everyone’s faces suddenly horribly disfigured?

Ch: Are they melting? It looks like they’re melting.

Op: Yeah. And…ours are fine?

G: See! You two are sleeping in class! I told you that having a party right after fighting that Nightmare was a bad idea! Growing girls need sleep!

Op: Honestly, I’m more concerned about the horrific burns on everyone’s face than I am about our counterparts’ unhealthy sleeping habits.

H: HA! Called it! It’s a simulation! None of those people are real! We’re the only actual people here!

Op: Hey, credit where it’s due, you did call it.

G: Looks like Hitomi’s real too.

H: Oh, goody.

G: So’s that guy with the silver hair? Who is he?

Ok: Oh, so that must be Kyousuke!

Op: That was who I was up against? Huh. Well, he’s…pretty.

Ok: I always wondered what he looked like.

Op: …so?

Ok: I’m sure past me thought he was good-looking, but I still think I traded up.

Op: Darn right, you did.

…

Ch: So who took the time to make food in the shape of your heads?

Ok: You know, between this and Hitomi, there’s a lot of severed heads going around.

=Candeloro frowns and feels her neck=

Ch: You okay?

Ca: I’m fine. I just got the weirdest feeling of déjà vu all of a sudden.

Ok: Who wants to bet that the one with all the bags of junk food for lunch is Ophelia?

Op: What? Why me in specific?

Ca: That one must be mine.

Ch: Well, at least I get my own severed-head snack now.

G: Right next to Kyubey.

H: If there was any justice in the world that would be his actual head.

G: Still. Those soul-gem treats are pretty creative.

Ca: Oh, wait! Never mind! That’s Homura’s lunch.

Ch: Homulilly? Why are you eating my face?

H: Don’t ask.

Op: And of course I snatch Blue Raspberry’s soul-gem!

Ok: Even then, you couldn’t keep me out of your mouth.

Op: AAANNNDDD the rat just ate it. Huh.

Ok: Oh, that makes me so uncomfortable.

Ch: And we get a close-up of me looking like a lunatic. Thanks, movie.

Op: I mean, that is a pretty accurate depiction of your face whenever you get anywhere near a piece of mozzarella.

H: All of this making me incredibly uneasy.

G: What is?

H: The slow pace. The lack of audible dialogue. The somber music. Something is up.

Ch: That’s all kinds of deliberate.

H: Well, at least this other me can tell that something’s wrong.

Op: I for one am incredibly disappointed in the rest of us. Everyone in the city has their faces burned off. That ought to at least raise a few red flags.

…

Ok: AAANNNDDD it’s gone all weird again!

Ca: Okay, this is obviously a witch’s labyrinth. They’re not even hiding it anymore.

Ok: Except from us. Like, are we blind?

Op: Oh, hey. It’s me. A lunch date?

H: I doubt it.

G: Is any of this normal? I mean, I know Freehaven is strange to newcomers but normal to us, so in this world, is it normal to just hang out on a floating island filled with chairs and tables with really long legs while blimps fly by in formation?

Ok: To say nothing of that freakshow going on down there. What are those? Those creepy little girls and the guy with the wind-up box?

Ca: Witch’s familiars.

=everyone looks to Charlotte, who is nonplussed=

Ch: You know, I’m actually okay with being the villain. At least that would make sense!

Op: You better get some kind of redemption arc and a weirdly sexually charged gunfight with Candeloro.

Ch: That would honestly make up for everything else that’s happened so far.

Ca: I don’t know. All of this looks very witchy, but it wasn’t what I remember from your labyrinth.

…

Op: Hey. Teenaged me. Wake up and smell the bad drug trip.

Ch: Why do you guys have so many cups on that table? Do you have a drinking problem or something?

Op: Look, shit is weird. Don’t judge our coping mechanisms.

G: Is it just me, or is there a bunch of random objects just falling out of the sky all around you?

Ok: Is it just me, or did that blimp have to come literally out of the river to fly at that angle?

H: This is getting progressively more dream-like.

Op: Nice crotch-shot, movie. How come I don’t get the boob or butt camera like Candy and Tavi?

Ch: Do you really want us to answer that question?

Op: I’d prefer if you didn’t.

H: Anyone else notice that the number of cups keep changing?

Op: Like I said. We all have our own ways of coping. Don’t judge.

…

H: Well, at least I’m noticing that something’s off. Even if I’m completely blind to the obviously bizarre stuff going on all around me?

G: Oh, so it’s going to be like a mystery story! And you’re the detective!

Op: And I get to be the sidekick. There are worst roles, I guess.

Ch: I guess that means you’re the main character after all, Lilly.

H: Thank you, but I’d really rather be the lead of a completely different movie.

…

Op: And off we go, on our wild adventure!

H: Beneath endless stone bridges. I mean, seriously. If either of us wanted proof that something was wrong, all we have to do is look up.

G: If this is a fake world you’re trapped in, you’re probably programmed to not notice that anything’s wrong. You know, like how we never really how strange dreams are until we wake up.

Op: Oh, what the hell. The bus is dropping us off in this fever dream? WAKE UP, IDIOTS! WAKE UP AND SMELL THE FREAKY!

Ch: They’re not even hiding it anymore.

G: You know, I can’t help but wonder if this world was always this strange, but that since the first few minutes were from our point of view all the weird stuff not having to do with the Nightmare wasn’t shown. But now that Lilly’s noticed, the weirdness just keeps coming out more and more.

Ch: I would not be surprised.

Ca: I think we can all collectively agree that despite whatever the witch turns out to be, this is all Kyubey’s fault, right?

Op: Fine by mean.

Ok: Agreed.

H: I wonder where all those fake people are going.

Op: I’m just going to assume that there’s a big meat grinder at the bottom of those stairs.

G: Ew.

…

Op: Oh, that’s not right? THAT’S NOT RIGHT? YAH THINK?

Ok: Of course you would be tipped off by the wrong destination but not by the field of hazy red filled with windmills.

Op: Turn left? We were supposed to turn left? HOW CAN YOU TELL? THERE’S NOTHING THERE!

Ch: That does bring up an interesting point. I’m assuming that you’re just blind to the weirdness because it’s got you trapped. So, what is it that you’re seeing?

G: Probably just a normal road, I guess.

Ok: Well, what did you expect taking the loop line?

…

Ch: Okay, so there’s a clear divide between the big, empty, red field with the windmills and the mostly normal looking city.

H: A very loose definition of the word “normal.”

Ch: Well, yeah, but you know what I mean.

H: Like I said. It’s not real.

Ch: We know, I’m just trying to pick out details.

Ok: Hey, girls. Don’t get on the creepy bus.

…

G: If at first you don’t succeed…

Op: Come on, other me! Get a clue!

H: I notice the field is blue now.

Ch: Probably to signify the change from day to night.

Ok: That bus driver is weirdly okay with a couple teenaged girls jumping onto the front of his bus and yelling at him.

H: He’s a fakedy-fake-fake.

Ok: We know! It’s called commentary!

H: Sorry.

Op: “Crossroads”? “Left fork”? How can you tell the difference! It’s a bunch of shiny tiles and windmills!

G: Plus that giant tower made of pipes!

Op: That was probably where we were heading. Giant tower made of pipes.

Ok: Wonder where the ramen shop was.

Op: Third pipe cluster from the bottom.

Ch: Hey, girls. Word of advice. Don’t walk into the scary, blank void.

Op: I know they can’t see the weirdness, but I still feeling like yelling at them.

G: Oh, hey! It’s normal again!

H: They were brought back to the city.

G: Well, relatively normal, at least. With a really tall bridge and giant moon.

…

Op: So…are we about to kiss or something?

H: Obviously not.

Op: I don’t know. You’re holding me awfully close.

H: I’m just trying to keep you from doing something stupid.

Op: If you say so.

…

Op: Oh, hey. If we didn’t have enough problems, it’s a zombie apocalypse.

H: All with our faces, I see.

Op: Somehow, that’s freakier than if they were just the classic rotting kind.

Ca: Obviously a defense system put in place by the witch. Once one of its prisoners start to notice that something’s wrong, the familiars come in to stop them.

Ch: You know, as much as the early parts weirded me out, I am really starting to dig this! I mean, sure, the cake song was…a thing that happened, but now there’s a reason for the weirdness! There’s a mystery! There’s set-up and atmosphere! It’s not just weird for the sake of being weird!

Ok: I’m pretty sure there’s some of that.

Ch: Well, sure.

H: You do remember that with the way things are going, you’re probably going to be revealed as the villain, right?

Ch: I am okay with this.

…

Op: And the zombies leave after I change my stance?

Ok: Those hips don’t lie.

H: More of they sensed that you weren’t resisting anymore.

Op: Might want to rephrase that.

H: You made it dirty. Not me.

Op: At least this me is starting to wake up. So you have at least one bad bitch supporting you.

H: I feel so much better.

G: Oh, hey! Even then you did that thing where you give people candy as a sign of affection!

Op: I’m honestly surprised that more people don’t do that. Honestly, most problems would be solved if people just gave each other candy all the time.

[2018shawn]

the anatomy of you and i | s.m

Hi I was wondering if could do prompt cozy 3 and 12 with Shawn and inexperienced!y/n she’s never shared a bed with a boy before or something only if ur comfortable u don’t have to of course just thought it would be soft and sweet 🙈❤️

cozy prompt 3: “Don’t be nervous, you can come closer”

cozy prompt 12: We could... take a nap together?

a/n: so it came out like college!shawn x college!reader au bc that’s just kinda what flowed so i hope that’s ok and i also really kinda wanna do a part 2 to this because it turned out more of a fic than a blurb lmao 🥺👉🏽👈🏽 also pt 2 i’m sorry the layout of this is gross i’m on my phone and can’t figure out how to do anything ok bye

warnings: just swearing and i think that might be it

the music from the room next to yours was something you imagined only happened in movies. it was loud and bassy and everything you didn’t want on a wednesday evening; you knew part of living in dorms would entail disturbances and inconveniences, but a party? on a wednesday night? you picked up your tote bag full of reading and text books after throwing your trusty vans jumper over your head, all ready and prepared to head down to the 24/7 library on campus. 

if you thought the music was loud in your room, you could think again, because in the hallway, not only could you hear the echos from the speakers, you could hear the shrill screams and yells from the party goers. the further away you got from your neighbouring apartment, the (thankfully) quieter it got and your short trip to the library was soon complete, the dull street lamps and soft breeze in the trees accompanying you along the way.

just as you thought, the library was empty, nothing but the sound of the door clicking shut behind you filling the room. a relieved sigh left your lips as you tugged your bag close to your body, as if the room was full of robbers who were about to mug you for your oh so precious books. opting for a more relaxed approach, seeing as it was 10.45pm, you headed to the sofa area, half thinking it would be a great place to take a nap.

instead, the anatomy of the heart was more important and your assignment was due in within a matter of days. you grabbed one handle of your bag, stretching it away from your body so you could pull out your book of choice before coming around to the front of the sofas so you could finally relax and take your time and- oh. you weren’t the only one here.

even though he was sprawled across the sofa, you could tell he was tall, really tall. the cap, embroidered with the college logo, covered his hair, but from the few stray strands, you could see wild, chocolatly curls falling loose. his eyes were shut, almost peacefully, arms crossed across his chest and very, very quietly, you could hear the soft sound of music coming from his headphones. his eyes flickered open, feeling a presence above him, and he laughed at you when you freaked out, realising you were staring at him. creepy or not, he thought you were cute; the way your finger twirled the front sections of your hair, the way your hip popped to the side as you watched over his resting frame, the way your eyes pulled into a squint as if it was the most bizzare thing to see another person in the library. the very public library.

you muttered a very embarrassed i’m sorry, before turning to walk away from the chilled area of the building. he pulled out his headphones, the sound of the 1975 becoming much more prominent, and propped himself up on his forearms. “hey, no...” he spoke, “come sit.”

scoffing, you rolled your eyes as you thought to yourself, as if you was going to let a random (but incredibly handsome) boy tell you what to do. as if you was going to actually listen and do as he said. as if- who are we kidding; your feet brought you back to the sofas, perching awkwardly on the end of the seat opposite his. he smiled, not smugly, not suggestively, not even cockily, but just a pure, genuine smile. “sorry i didn’t realise people actually like...”

“used the library?” you raised an eyebrow and he threw his head back in laughter, forearms still supporting his body which only made his t shirt strain against his chest. you recognised him from around campus, and you thought he was one of the music kids, one of the ones that did open mic nights and played guitar on the beach until 1am, but from the judgment of his toned physice, you thought maybe he played a spot of sport on the side, just for fun. not like the serious jocks who lived, breathed and worshiped football. he was definitely friends with your roommates boyfriend too, or friends with one of his friends, or- something like that, there’s a lot of people at college.

“yeah, well, no. but at this hour? why don’t you just read in bed?”

you sank back into the cushions, bringing up your legs and crossing them infront of you, looking like a little buddha wearing a vans hoodie and comfy leggings. “why don’t you just lay down in bed?”

this time, when he smiled, he smirked. “touché.”

he popped his headphone back in his ear, and the music died down again as he let his head fall back to the sofa, eyes closing shut. you wondered what had happened to bring him here, why the somewhat popular boy was cooped up in the library at this hour with clearly no intent of using the facilities. he thought the same about you. you felt awkward at first, pulling out your reading and note books, turning to the pages you had marked and setting them down around you. unbeknown to you, he cocked his head to the side slightly, eyes opening into thin slits as he watched you. he’d seen you around, even told one of your friends that he thought you were cute, but you were from different stretches of the college and really, he was nothing but the friend of a friend of a friend of a friend. he wanted to tuck the fallen piece of hair behind your ear and help you lean onto him as he noticed how you struggled to manage holding two books at once and tell you not to grind your pen in between your teeth as you thought about your work and- “can i help you?”

busted.

“sorry, i just... what you reading?” he asked, even though he could quite clearly see the front cover of the book, which read a bold title of the essentials of human anatomy and physiology. and even though you held the front cover up further, showing him more of what he could already see, you confirmed it with words.

“i got an assignment on the heart, so, yeah...” you shrugged, peeling off a post it note marker and sticking it to a relevant paragraph in the book.

“can i see?” he didn’t know why he was asking, he just knew he wanted to be closer to you. he genuinely was interested in what you were learning, and although you’d only spoken a handful of words to each other, he thought the way you spoke and tone of voice was the nicest he’d ever heard. nicer than any voices he’d heard during his classes and he studies with people who sing all day. he pushed himself up, body resting into the corner of the sofa, leaving an empty space on the pad next to him. you took that as an invitiation, not entirely sure where your sudden confidence and welcoming of strangers had come from. “what are you studying?”

“human evolutionary biology and biological science.” it rolled from off your tongue like you said it every living minute as you rested down on the sofa next to him. “you?” even though you were 95% sure you already knew, you didn’t want to let on.

his answer was much simpler, and in all honesty, he felt like a fool. “music.”

“that sounds fun.” you nodded with a smile. he reached over for your book, fingers running down the edges as he looked over the words which looked like a completely different language. your body was tense, and the closer he got, the more you could feel your heart beating, which just felt highly ironic.

“these words...” he laughed, mentally kicking himself for sounding like a dumbass who literally just knew how to strum a few chords. “chor... da? tend.. in.. ee?” you giggled innocently at his attempt, but he found it in no was patronising or belittling. in fact, he thought it was cute.

“chordae tendineae.” you confirmed, looking up and directly into his eyes for the first time. you were instantly lost in the hazel pools that looks slightly lighter when certain flashes of light fell across his skin. “heart strings, to you and i.”

you went on to explain that heart strings were in fact not just an expression that people used when they felt some sort of emotion, that you could actually physically hold a heart by their - chordae tendineae - strings and they wouldn’t break because they’re so tough. you told him it would take a lot of strength and pain to actually break one. he admired how passionate you were about the subject, reeling off facts as if you could tell them in your sleep. “sorry, i get carried away.”

your cheeks blushed a deep shade of pink and you did that hair, twirly thing you did when you felt nervous. “don’t apologise, it’s nice.” he restored your faith that not all pretty boys were assholes, and maybe it was just your poor judgment in the past that had led you to ever think that. as you stared down at your book, he stared at you, wondering if he was being overly friendly or super creepy or just a total inconvenience to your evening. you thought he was neither of those, but simply a nice addition.

“so, what brings you here at...” you looked at your watch for time reference, eyes widening as you realised you been sat boring him for the past 20 minutes... about heart strings. “11.30 on a wednesday night.”

he shrugged, leaning back and falling into the cushions, hoping a more relaxed body language would help you to relax a little more too. he could tell you were just perched on the edge of the sofa for fear of touching him. “sick of my room mate fucking his girlfriend like a porn star, dont know how he’s got it in him.” your lips formed an open ‘o’ shape, not expecting the sudden change in tone or language. “told him i was going out, he said he’ll be done by 11.30.”

“and they said chivalry is dead.” you dryly commented, only to make his eyes crinkle up as he laughed. “do you have a rota for that kinda thing or is it just a come and go as you please kinda rotation?”

“well, my rota’s severely empty.” you were shocked, and thought maybe he was just saying it because he might be a total fuck boy. you could imagine he had girls falling at his feet, and you wouldn’t blame them, because those eyes. “what about you?” you furrowed your eyebrows at him and tilted your head. “no... i mean... the why are you here part... not the sex rota part...” he pulled his cap further over his forehead, wanting to bury himself in a pit of embarrassment. if you didn’t think he was a creep before, you most probably did now, he was sure of that.

to say you were, inexperienced, would be total honesty. you’d slept with one guy and one guy only, and he was someone who thought having sex on the foot of the bed was adventurous, and you vowed never to distract yourself from your studies with boys who would waste your time. it was also just a couple of hook ups, nothing serious, in fact, you’d never even shared a bed with him overnight- and you laughed at yourself for ever being the naive girl that thought he wasn’t just using you to get laid. “there’s a party next door, they usually go on until the early hours, so whether i’m here or there, i still get no sleep.” you confirmed, and he nodded, half wishing you were going to tell him your rota was also empty. not because he wanted to pounce on you and take advantage, but because the hopeless romantic inside of him thought maybe there’d be a pathway to something special. “also, it’s 11.30, so your probably safe to head back.”

he thought maybe he was an inconvenience to your evening, that you said that because you wanted him to leave you in peace so you could crack on with what you’d set out to do. shoot your shot, shawn, he thought to himself, pulling his bottom lip inbetween his teeth and you had to force your eyes away from him because you suddenly felt all warm and bothered. “you wanna come?”

“huh?” your head snapped up, book also falling from your grip and you fumbled to stop it from landing on the floor. it was an expensive book, and you weren’t about to let some cute ass boy ruin your pages.

“not like... i mean... if you want somewhere to stay. i can take the sofa.” in the 8 months you’d been at this college, not one boy had offered you an invitation back to his dorm. mainly because you hid from any form of human contact and spent most of your time cooped up in your own room with no intention of leaving.

something in you switched, when you looked back to him to see he’d taken his cap and flipped it backwards, the peak of the hat now dipping behind the back of his neck. more light hit his features, and you felt like jelly, realising just how incredibly perfect he was. even the little scar on his cheek was kissable and you don’t know where this new confident you had appeared from this evening. you leant closer, placing your book down - carefully, of course - on the sofa, letting your hands rest on his thighs and you thought you felt him tense up, but you were probably just imagining it. “only if we can stop for hot chocolate.”

“i think we have some.”

“whipped cream?”

“is that for the hot chocolate or for me?”

although he was joking, he didn’t know if what he had said had sent a wrong message, because on the walk back to his dorm, you went back to being your quiet little self, answering questions briefly and turning the questions around onto him more often than not.

you didn’t think he had sent a wrong message, but you were well and truely helpless at flirting and maybe he wasn’t even flirting with you and you was completely overthinking it, but nevertheless, it made your stomach tighten and breaths deepen. whether it was an accident or not, your hands brushed against each other’s several times on the walk back, and it was one of those cliche, awkward moments where you both look at each other and laugh awkwardly like little kids. both of you also introduced yourself, coming to the realisation that no names had been exchanged but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t already know yours because he definitely searched for you came across you on facebook. “are you sure you’re okay? i can stay with you in the library if you prefer?” he asked, although you were both nearly at his door.

“you think i’m walking all the way back over there? nuh-uh, plus, you promised hot chocolate.” he smiled and nodded, “unless... you don’t want me, and then i totally can leave you alone.”

“no i do want you.” he spoke so quick he thought he must’ve sounded so desperate. “do want you to be here, i mean, like, if you’re cool.”

you nodded, feeling somewhat... wanted? by a cute boy? who treat you like a lady and offered you his jacket even though you had your own? who literally peeled your bag from your shoulder, just so he could carry it for you? and made you walk the side of the sidewalk furthest away from the road? and took a genuine instrest in what you said?

you’d be damned if you didn’t wake up and it was all a dream. this was by far the most college-ey thing you’d ever done; meeting a random guy in a random location and deciding to risk your life by going back to his place. maybe risking your life was a bit dramatic but we’ve all seen what happens in horror movies.

when you both reached his door, he unlocked it with the key and swung it open, holding out his arm as invitation for you to go first. of course, you thought, just be even more of a gent. inside the room, it was very similar layout to yours - you walked straight into the living/kitchen area and three doors were spread across the two back walls, one of which you guessed to be the bathroom and the other two to be bedrooms. the room was dull, the television being the only thing to illuminate the area and shawn sighed with relief when he saw his roommate and his girlfriend chilled on the sofa. “well, looks like we’re safe from the porn.” he whispered to you, throwing his keys on the table next to the door.

when his roommate’s girlfriend heard shawn speaking, she shot up and peered over the back of the sofa. her eyes flickered between you and shawn, before she poked at her boyfriends arm to get his attention. “brian...” he ignored her at first, popping another piece of popcorn in his mouth. “brian. shawn has a girl here.”

“girl can hear you. and so can shawn.” shawn said, rolling his eyes as brian also shot up, smirking as the four of you all entered a staring competition.

was it such a big thing he had a girl here? because you didn’t think it would be so much of a huge deal. have you seen him? perfect college boy with incredible muscles (from what you’d seen in your imaginatation), and here you were, stunning the members of the household into silence. “hi, uh, i’m y/n?” you almost sounded like you were questioning yourself, unsure whether you were meant to say anything or not.

the girl got up from the sofa, offering you some popcorn as a peace offering before she finally spoke to you, instead of about you. “so sorry, shawn just, never brings girls here because - ow!” shawn lightly jabbed her on the arm, taking the full bag of popcorn for himself and grabbing a handful. “it’s nice to meet you, i’m winnie. and brian...” she pointed at the boy still sat on the sofa who was too busy sending brain signals and eye expressions, about the random girl in their apartment, to shawn to notice he was being introduced. “brian was actually just talking about getting a mcdonald’s so, we can go do that and you can do... your thing.”

“nothing like that,” shawn was quick to jump in and although you weren’t necessarily here for a quick fuck or a one night stand, you felt slightly disappointed.

“oh? okay, well, let us know.” she smiled and snatched her popcorn back from shawn. “i know shawn doesn’t take long.” she laughed, clearly joking about the situation which only made shawn feel like he was dealing with bringing a girl home to his parents for the first time. before thinking about it, shawn grabbed your hand and dragged you towards one of the back rooms, presumably his bedroom.

you figured it must be when the door opened and you saw three guitars perched against the wall, an unmade bed, a laptop open on the desk and a bunch of photos on the wall of him with numerous other people. “make yourself comfortable, i’ll be back in a second.” he smiled and vanished back out of the room.

taking the time to be a bit nosy, you let’s yourself study the photos on the wall. a shorter, younger girl appeared in a fair few, along with two older adults who would appear to be his family and it made you smile at the fact he wasn’t afraid to have them on display. you felt a light twinge in your heart as you looked at a picture in which a girl was kissing his cheek, even though you had no right to feel any form of jealousy. moving on, you found the notebooks on his desk that was already opened up on a page which sent your notebook organisation through the roof. the page was full of messy scribbles, more than half of the words had been crossed out aggressively and replaced with new words. it was quiet, only the sound of quiet mutters could be heard from the other side of the door and you tried you’re best to listen in to what they were saying.

dude, she’s hot

you’ve never made any other chick hot chocolate

go back in that room and get some

at least try

you tried to look like you weren’t eavesdropping when he came back into the room, holding two mugs of hot chocolate, and just as you’d requested, with whipped cream. shawn thanked brian and winnie and their weird ass sex kinks for that. “thank you.” you smiled, taking it from him and wrapping your small hands around the mug to be met with warmth.

“i’m, uh, sorry about them..” he said, setting his own drink down on the bedside table.

“don’t be. they seem nice.”

“so, if you wanna go to sleep i can leave you be and like i said, i can take the couch and you can have the bed.”

“we could both have the bed?” you’d said, before even having time to think about letting the words fall from your mouth. his eyes almost looked like they’d lit up and you blew into your hot chocolate just so you had something to do instead of awkwardly staring back at him. “if you want, i mean, i can go home, i’m sure the party will die down soon.”

“stop doing that.” he rolled his eyes, leaning back against his headboard as you sat cross legged at the edge of his bed, surrounded by the navy duvet.

“doing what?”

“doubting yourself.”

“well i’m good at it.” he laughed at you, reaching his hands out and taking your hot chocolate mug from your grasp.

“i wanna know more about that heart shit.” he admitted, missing how you passionately spoke about something you were so interested in.

“heart shit... you mean the thing that keeps you alive? maybe tomorrow, i’m all organed out.” he looked a little disappointed and you thought maybe he was thinking you’re suggesting you don’t wanna stay up with him. he was wrong. “although, modern family is back on netflix now and that is something i will never turn down.”

he grabbed his laptop from his desk, setting it next to you at the edge of the bed. you adjusted yourself, moving more to the middle of the mattress, therefore, slightly closer to shawn. you could smell his cologne, just like you could when you sat close to him in the library.

smiling at how you twirled your hair, bit your lip when you concentrated on what people were saying, covered your mouth with the sleeve of your sweater when you started to yawn, he thought; it was weird, how he just had this feeling that he wanted to spend countless nights with you, learning about whatever organ you needed to. and you thought too; how you felt more comfortable around him than any other person you’d met at college thus far.

still sat upright, cross legged in the middle of his bed, your back started to ache and legs started to feel numb as the second episode started. you stretched out as much as you could before looking behind you and eyeing up the empty space next to shawn. “i was wondering how long before you couldn’t sit like a buddha anymore.” he laughed, speaking over the familiar theme tune coming from the laptop. “please get comfy, you look in pain.”

“i am not in pain, i am simply just... respecting personal space.” in all honesty, you couldn’t remember the last time you cuddled up to a boy. the last guy used to literally leave as soon as he’d done what he needed to do, leaving you empty and alone every night. “and you might not want me, all up in your space.”

“oh my god, just stop!” he laughed, despite his demanding tone.

“stop what?!”

“doubting yourself... again!”

you huffed, uncrossing your legs and crawling up to where shawn was sat. he smirked as you got closer, settling down next to him, your back also against the headboard. your legs were outstretched, finally free from their crossed positioning, and your hands fell to your lap. another ten minutes of the episode went by when you get yourself getting tireder, head leaning to one side a little more.

shawn noticed how your body was a little more relaxed, less rigid than when you first joined him at the head of the bed. risking his move, he stretched his arm behind you, draping it over your shoulder which caused any relaxed part of your body to stiffen back up. “don’t be nervous, you can come closer.”

you looked up to him, shooting him a warm smile. it didn’t take long for your body to relax again, and it actually felt nice how natural it felt to be curled into his body. his fingers traced patterns on your shoulder as your head moved in time with his chest, a loud yawn escaping your mouth. “tired?”

“mhmm,” you answered, evidently too tired to even speak an official word.

“we could... take a nap together?” he stuttered.

“a nap? shawn it’s like 12.30am, we need a full ass sleep.” you giggled, leaning up off him to pull your sweater over your head.

“then a full ass sleep we shall have.” he sorted the set up out, turning off the laptop and placing it back on the desk. he took out a t shirt and shorts from his drawers, putting them on the edge of the bed before retrieving and additional pair of shorts. he told you he was going to change in the bathroom, and to put his clothes on, only if you wanted, before disappearing out. you took advantage of the empty room, immediately peeling off your own clothes and replacing them with his. they smelt like him, like citrus and cassis and as you climbed back into the bed, where you were previously sat, a light tap on the door sounded.

“yup,” you said, popping the last letter as he shot his head around the door, smiling when he saw you’d taken up his offer of borrowing his clothes. he says borrow, but he’d be more than happy for you to keep them, because you looked a hell of a lot better in them than he did.

he’d lost his t shirt, not that you were going to complain - and yes, he did have muscles exactly how you’d imagined him to - and the sweat shorts he’d changed into hung low from his hips and you’re pretty sure you’ve never seen a sight like it. shawn wasn’t the type of boy to feel embarrassed or nervous; hell, he’d managed to shit talk his way into getting you to come back to his dorm, just in a bid to keep hold of your company because he’s never felt a feeling like it. shawn’s clothes were the first you’d ever borrowed from a guy, never having the experience of the morning after or spending a long night with someone you really like, staying up all night and talking about nothing in particular. it was also a first that you’d let yourself be conned into coming back to a guys dorm.

“you sure you don’t want me to take the sofa?” he asked as he stood at the side of his bed, unintentionally towering over you, almost making you feel as big as ladybug.

“stop doing that.” you raised your eyebrows, pushing back the duvet so there was an empty space next to you.

his face showed pure confusion, having no idea what he’d done. “doing what?”

“doubting yourself.” you mocked his voice the best you could, dropping a few pitches and moving your head theatrically.

he rolled his eyes, plopping down into the empty space next to you, and although his clothes smelt like him on your body, he could still smell the orchid and vanilla scent that covered your skin. “i don’t sound like that.”

rolling onto his side, he turned to face you, slightly closer for comfort than he would normally like to be, but with you, he didn’t think he was close enough. you were on your back, eyes tracing the outline of the shadows on the ceiling that crept through from the blinds. “you kinda do.”

“oh... as opposed to, the deoxygenated blood travels into the left ventricle-” he’d put on his best higher pitched voice.

“right atrium.”

“-and opens those little valvey things-”

“just valves is fine.” you rolled onto your side to face him, but he was too busy mocking you to notice.

“-which make your heart do the ba-dum thing that i’ve been able to feel in my fucking throat all night-”

“you mean the heartbeat?”

“-all because you’ve been pulling on my chordane tendineae because you’re just too fucking amazing.” you swolled hard, and suddenly it was you who could feel the ba-dum thing in your throat. he was just looking at you, now aware you were face to face with him, only inches apart in his queen sized bed. he had just tried to twist your words in a confession of admiration, but couldn’t help but think he’d just sounded dumb instead. “no smart ass comment?”

normally you’d be offended at someone calling your comments smart ass, because they were in fact just the truth, but you knew shawn was messing, although, maybe not about the heartbeat part. you’d found yourself being drawn in, faces getting closer together with each breath, so much so you almost didn’t notice how his hand was stroking over the skin of your hip. he was searching your face for an invitation, he wanted to kiss you so bad, but at the same time, didn’t want to scare you off. the air was thick, and you were sure you could hear your heartbeat, but shawn was convinced it was his. his breath fanned against your lips, creating a cool minty sensation, and as your eyashes fluttered, your eyes looked straight into his. “kiss me.”

shawn taglist: @imaginashawnns @fallinallincurls @mendesficsxbombay @fallinfortom

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #457

“blue are the words i say and what i think  /  blue are the feelings that live inside of me”

Do you buy your lingerie at Victoria’s Secret? No. That shit is so overpriced and not for my size group. Would you ever use an online dating service? I never would again. Are you good at multitasking? ABSOLUTELY NOT. Have you ever eaten Frosted Mini Wheats? Ugh, those are so gross. What does your bikini look like? You think THIS bitch wears a bikini??????????????????????? Does age really matter in a relationship? To an extent, yes. How much does the last person you kissed mean to you? I honestly don't even know if I'd be here without her. Almost like magic, Sara popped back into my life right after I returned home from the hospital following my suicide attempt. She helped make recovery possible as a solid source of support. Do you use lotion? Not NEARLY enough. My skin is so dry; I need to. Do you believe in teenage love? I experienced it deeply and thoroughly, so yes. Have you ever sat on the roof of your house? No. Do you like Sublime? I like that one popular one of theirs. "Santaria" or whatever it's called? What’s your favorite movie genre? Paranormal horror, especially the "found footage" type. It's creepy to imagine it being actually real. Is there a celebrity that you’d be willing to have a one night stand with? If he was single? I know in my gut I would lmaooooo Do you want to live in your current town the rest of your life? OH MY GOD PLEASE NO If you found out today your best friend was gay what would you do? She's demisexual, so. She can like anybody. If you could get a pet for free today-what kind/what name? A tegu, because it wouldn't need an enclosure that I don't have. I'd let it free roam. God, I can only imagine Roman's reaction. How many people have you slept with? If you mean what I think you do by "slept," one. Do you ever wish you had a family business to become a part of? Not really. What’s the most gruesome way you could come up with to kill someone? Hunny, have you seen my dark RP????? The world best be glad I'm a pacifist lmfao Do you think anyone deserves to die that way? I don't believe in torture, so no. If you had to fight for survival, what would your weapon of choice be? A gun, I guess? I'd want something with range and that's quick. I wanted to say a bow and arrow, but preparing another arrow after shooting once could really cost you your life. Where did you buy your favorite pair of jeans? I don't wear jeans anymore. Do you have a large dog? We don't have a dog, period. If not, are you afraid of them? No, I love big 'ole puppos!!!!! I just don't wanna own a dog myself. Are you good at playing darts? Holy fuck no, I have NO hand-eye coordination. I once stabbed the guy at a balloon popping booth thing with a dart in the arm, if that tells you anything, ooooooooooof. Do you like breaded chicken sandwiches? YESSSSSSSSS omg Do your parents know that/if you smoke? They know that I don’t. Have you ever been under a blacklight? Omg so in elementary school, we did this thing once where we all washed our hands as best we could and then put them under some sort of light (maybe a blacklight, idk???) to see JUST how resilient germs are. You gotta scrub the fuck out ya hands, people. How many pounds do you want to lose? I'd rather not share a number, but a lot. What’s your favorite natural phenomenon? The Northern Lights. Do you snore? Very surprisingly for someone with sleep apnea like mine, I actually don't. How many people do you know with the same first name as you? Off the very top of my head, one, but it's spelled differently. I KNOW I know of a shitload more Brittanys, though. Is it possible you could be pregnant? Well, I haven't been intimate with a man in years and just finished my period, so like- Could you go a day without texting? I go most days without texting. Do you have a step-parent? My dad is remarried, so yes. If so, do you get along with them? She's EXTREMELY Christian, so her beliefs wildly disagree with mine, but I keep my mouth shut a lot just to keep the peace. She IS a very sweet woman, nevertheless, and am glad she and my dad are so happy together. Does your current/last job require that you wear a uniform? My last job (which lasted not even two hours lol) did. When will your driver’s license expire? My permit has been expired for like... two years. Do you live in an apartment? No. If the last person you kissed proposed to you what would you say? That's too wild a concept to even imagine. I'd probably ask if she was okay lmao. Would you ever get back with one of your exes? Weeeelp, I want to get back together with Girt. Pretty badly. Write a foreign word, and what it means: "Schadenfreude" is a German term that essentially means secondhand embarrassment, but it doesn't have a perfect translation. Is there an ex you think about everyday? Inevitably. That's PTSD, my friends. Who is the last person that you said I love you to, besides family members? Sara. What's the worst thing you have ever said to anyone? Something along the lines of "no one could ever love you like I do." It boils my blood just typing that; I considered even deleting this question. That quote right there is fucking manipulation, even IF I thoroughly believed it. Who was the last person to comment one of your pictures? I don't feel like looking. Do you tend to go for older or younger when looking for someone to date? It's weird, I'm into slightly older-than-me guys, but probably girls who are barely a bit younger than me. Have you ever been used? I don't think so. Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head? Like I've said in plenty of surveys: Jason is probably a permanent fixture. But also as of the past two days, Girt's been living up there. I went from "hmmm I just don't know how I feel" to "FUCK I want to talk to him about how stupidly into him I am right this fucking INSTANT" pretty goddamn fast. It kinda scares me just because of how extreme my feelings are. Again. That's only ever gotten me hurt. Buuuut let's not get into that. Have you ever got caught cheating on a test? No, because I've never tried to. Will your next kiss be a mistake? I hope it won't be. But it's not like I know the future. Have you ever worn an oxygen mask? Actually yes, when I was young and thought I was having an asthma attack or something. Mom had one for her own asthma. Then I obviously wore one for surgery. What song do you want to be played at your funeral? "Paradise" by Coldplay is absolutely #1. How many swear words are in the song you’re listening to? I'm not listening to music; I'm back to watching Gab play Sekiro. What color was the last swimsuit you wore? Black. Have you ever kissed anyone of the same sex, and if so, who? Yeah, just Sara. Who did you last tell to ‘shut up’? Ha, I think my WoW friend Lyndsey, but only playfully, of course. We pick fun at each other all the time. Would you ever get a tattoo of a boyfriend/girlfriend's name? NOOOOOOOOO. Are you one of those girls who already have baby names picked out? I know what I'd name my kids IF I actually wanted any, yeah, but I don't. Do you think guys with long hair are attractive? Yessss, I love long hair on guys. Are any of your siblings taller than you? I think Ashley is a liiiiil bit taller? I know my brother is, for sure. Have you ever scared someone so badly that they cried? Yikes, no. When was the last time you wore high heels? Boy oh boy, no idea. Is there someone that you want to hurt right now? Jeez, no thanks. What was the most interesting or colorful birthday cake you’ve had? I don't remember, but I'm sure something from childhood. What was the last thing someone bought you? Was it expensive? Mom bought me food from McD's, which obviously isn't expensive. Do you have any interesting moles anywhere you don’t want people to know of? No. Have you ever gotten high or drunk in a really formal place? Strong "no" there. Do you ever write poetry and post it on any certain websites? On the very rare occasion I write poetry and actually like it, I'll sometimes post it on dA. What do you miss most about your childhood? Actually, genuinely having fun and not dealing with fucking anhedonia. Would you like to know the precise date of your future death? Hell no. Do you photograph well? I'd like to hope so. Are there any animals you flat out refuse to touch? Maggots and similar bug larvae. What super power would you refuse, if it was offered to you, and why? Mind reading. It just sounds... awful and overwhelming. What’s your favorite discontinued product that you wish would come back? Oh, I KNOW I have answers to this, just none are coming to me immediately and I don't feel like sitting here for five minutes thinking about it. If adults had show and tell, what would you bring into work? My snek! :') If you had a reset button for the last 10 years, would you press it? Tempting, but... I don't think I would. I cannot go through how deep my depression was again. Who is someone you would never swear in front of? My nieces and nephew. Yes, I don't believe in profanity being a "thing" and is just a stupid human fabrication, but nevertheless I acknowledge societal standards and expectations, and they're way too young to get when you shouldn't say something like that and why. Have you ever won a contest or competition? A few. Who is your favorite TV character? I don't think I really have one? Do you coo over other people’s babies? Not really, no. Sometimes I'll think they're super cute and be like "awww," but I don't like... squeal and spaz like some people do. What is something that makes you very squeamish? VOMIT. Has there been a celebrity death that really affected you? Steve Irwin got me deeper than anyone else. Chester Bennington hit real hard, too. If you’re out of high school, have you stayed in touch with your high school friends? If you’re still in school, do you think you will? Most of my closest ones, yes, at least via Facebook. What’s a movie that you want to see? Old movie, but Jacob's Ladder. It was a massive influence on Silent Hill, so naturally, I'll probably love it. It's a classic, anyway. Do you use the same username everywhere online or do you have a lot? I use "Ozzkat" in most places, but I do have some other ones for different sites. Who was the last person you know who became pregnant? My friend Ana recently revealed she's expecting her second child, a boy. What fad were you actually into? I have zero clue. Have you ever tailgated? Would you want to? Fuck no. That's how so many wrecks happen. My sister legit got in a wreck with an 18-wheeler mostly because she was tailgating (which she does BADLY); she was trying to pass, and he moved over at the same time because he couldn't see her coming around. It's a borderline miracle she got out with only some cuts, bruises, and a seatbelt burn. Have patience, people. Get off cars' asses. Why did you fall for the last person romantically? Look, don't get me started on this. There are a shitload of reasons and I have been way too emotional over this the past few days laksdfja;lwke What’s the last thing you had to eat? A bagel w/ cream cheese for breakfast. Do you ever pick up your house phone? We don't have a landline phone. Truth be told, are you more into looks or personalities the most? Personalities, for sure. I cannot be into you if your personality isn't attractive.

[bomberqueen17]

mother says no

Let me just preface this by saying I’ve never seen a ghost in my life, and I’m not sure I want to. But I love people’s ghost stories. And it’s always fun when  you’re in a group of people to bring up the topic and find out who among you can see ghosts, and who can’t. People’s ghost stories are always wild.

(The one apprentice who’s been here all summer is definitely a ghost-seer, and confidently said that the farmhouse isn’t haunted, nor is any of the farm. BIL, who is not a ghost-seer, hypothesized that all the ghosts wash right down the creek that goes through the farm, and go down the Quackenkill to the Poestenkill to the Hudson. VegMan, who also does not see ghosts, theorized that the ghosts of this farm would mostly be chickens, and also theorized that chicken ghosts would be no smarter than live chickens, so there wouldn’t be a whole lot to fear, especially since probably left unrestrained they would in fact just go in the creek and get washed away. So, somewhere in the Atlantic, depending on the currents, there’s like a large cache of ghosts of really stupid chickens that died on this farm...)

This conversation was during the Great Pumpkin Pie Off, so Farmkid’s BFF’s family was present, and while Rock Collecting Lady, BFF’s mom, was at the kids’ table, BFF’s dad was at our table. And it turns out, he can see ghosts, and their old house down in South Troy was super haunted. There was a cat, that they saw most often, and an old woman who was upstairs in the garage, and an old man who kind of wandered around. The other apprentice is clearly not a ghost-seer either, because she asked if the ghost cat glowed, and of course, no; most of the people who’ve told me stories have concurred that ghosts are just sort of echoes of people and critters and so on and largely look or sound like they did in life, just not entirely all there. (Very many of the ghost stories I’ve been told have been of ghost cats.)

“We thought it was the downstairs tenant’s cat,” BFF’s Dad said. “And then the tenants moved out and the cat stayed, and then we bought the whole building and spent a bunch of time in all of the building and knew no cat lived in the building and the cat stayed. And then we’d be sitting with both our cats in our laps and we’d hear it jump down from the table in the other room, stuff like that. It came and went regardless of doors, and was just around doing cat stuff where no cat should be. Our cats could see and hear it too.”

Anyway, we got talking about things being haunted and he told a story of when he and his wife were looking for an apartment. “When your main criteria is cheap you see some wild shit,” he said. “One place we looked at, the front room had a dirt floor, and I was like oh no we are not living here, but my wife was like, Can we have cats? anyway, and the landlord-- he was so creepy, you guys, he was super fucking creepy-- he closed his eyes and kind of tilted his head back and scrunched up his face, and went Mmmmm-- mother says no, and we were like we need to get the fuck out of here before he buries us under this dirt floor.”

so that’s now a punchline, on the farm. “Mmm... Mother says no.”

[salt-warrior]

WHEN EARTH TURNS TO ASHES

Masterlist

Chapter Seventeen: Song to the Lost

"So to recap what you're saying: Cinder's mother is actually a psycho ghost that we have to kill by going to Denver and lighting an old bracelet on fire?" Thorne practically gasped for air as he gave Kai a look that said he thought they should all be locked in an asylum.

"Yes," Cress responded without waiting a beat. "But we have to summon her mother first, or else we won't be able to banish her spirit to the Gray Realm." She said all of this as if it were the most ordinary thing in the world. "And whoever says the trigger words has to really mean them, or else it won't work."

Thorne sucked his lips in between his teeth and looked as if he were trying not to burst with laughter. "Okay, okay. So are we gonna do this now, or wait until after Christmas, or...?"

"I'm not making this up, Thorne," Cinder barked with agitation. Kai yearned to reach for her and lend some comfort, but he got the sense that it would only increase her rage.

Kai had come to believe Cinder and Cress after only a few minutes of arguing, but that didn't erase what he had said before he had come to the conclusion that they weren't lying. Cress may have forgiven Kai, but Cinder still remained stand-offish from him.

"They're not lying, Thorne," Kai said, earning an eye roll from his best friend. "They're not!" Kai exclaimed, feeling more and more defensive— though that may have just been his desire for Cinder to forgive him speaking.

Iko stepped toward Cinder and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "I believe it," Iko said. "I've always believed in ghosts, and your story makes complete sense." Thorne scoffed, but didn't interrupt.

"I've heard of the Gray Realm before, but what exactly is it? Why can't the ghost just go directly into the afterlife?" Iko asked, glancing a Cress.

A devilish grin spread across Cress' face, making her look like a mischievous schoolgirl. "The reason is this: the ghosts have come back to earth for another 'chance at life' and that makes them unable to live in whatever the afterlife is."

"So what is the Gray Realm?" Kai voiced the inward concerns of everyone else in the room. His whole brain hurt from his new knowledge of ghosts and whatever, but at least it all made sense.

"I was leading up to that," Cress spoke in a mocking tone. She looked at Cinder, raised her brows, and then turned back to Kai as if they were all petulant children who couldn't grasp one plus one.

"The Gray Realm—or Gray Void as some call it— is just another dimension of this world, but without all of the humans and stuff." Cress nodded and grinned in a way one would while talking about the probability of rain that afternoon. "Ghosts get caught in between the two realms, or the middle void. You have to banish them to the Gray Realm or else they're stuck in the middle realm forever."

"That's why old war-sites or places where murders happened are often said to be haunted." Cinder added with an air of professionalism. "It's hard enough to track down the power source of a single ghost who you knew well, but hundreds of ancient people whose power sources and backgrounds are impossible to figure out— it's not even fathomable."

Kai was beginning to wonder if one could pass out from information overload, just as Thorne put his hands in the air to silence the flow of confusion. "Whoa, okay, okay, please stop." Thorne paced across the room in a flurry of agitation, and Kai was right there with him. "While all of this creepy stuff actually almost makes sense, I don't understand why Cinder's ghost isn't like the others."

"What do you mean?" Cress and Cinder asked at the exact same moment.

Thorne scoffed, walked towards Cinder, and kneeled in front of her. He held his hands forward in a pleading motion, as if to signify his submission. His face had gone from bewildered to calm in three seconds flat— which Kai found an incredible feat considering the circumstances.

"Ghosts don't kill people normally, do they?" Thorne questioned. "Ghosts stay where they die, so why is Cinder's mom following her where ever she runs?"

Cinder placed a gentle hand on top of Thorne's, surprising everyone else in the room. "It's because I carry my mother's power source. The bracelet; I've always had it with me because I want to get rid of her, but it's also carried her with me."

"We tried burning it one time in High School, but its didn't even singe." Cress added. "We have to summon her first, and it has to be in Denver or else she can't be banished."

"As far as ghosts go, She's strong. She's not vulnerable unless we summon her on the site of her death." Cinder swallowed hard, her face contorting.

Kai hurt as he watched Cinder. She was too young to have no parents; too young to have watched the only people who loved her die in front of her eyes; too young to be so broken. Kai wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around her and tell her that it would be alright. He longed to shield her from all her woes— but some demons must be fought.

"Well," Kai said, nearly choking on his words. "What are we waiting for?"

***

"Your legs are taking up all the space," Thorne whined. "My right leg is all tingly now. Give me more space."

"Shut up, Thorne, we're almost there." Kai scolded from the driver's seat, sounding more akin to an agitated father than a best friend.

"Like I have more space," Iko threw back, knocking her legs into Thorne. "And your legs are too hot and sweaty. They're making me feel uncomfortable."

Cress moved her legs until they were crossed and crammed against the door. "Here, Iko, you can move your legs closer to mine."

"Oh, and now you're trying to make me feel bad!" Thorne exclaimed, pointing a wild finger at Cress. "And," Thorne drew a vicious finger on Iko, "my legs are sweaty because they have no room to breathe and are crying."

The bickering in the backseat continued, but Cinder didn't even notice. Her brain was too distracted. She was scared of what would happen; she didn't want anyone else to get hurt. She was frightened to have her friends with her. She wouldn't be able to forgive herself if anything happened to them.

Cinder remembered the first time her mother had come and attacked Ran Kesley. He was her first real friend, and she loved him more than she thought she could ever love a person. He didn't tease her for not having any family. He never cared that her mother had been killed because she was so far in debt due to her drug addiction. Ran only ever loved her, and he paid the unforgiving price of his own life for it.

Peony's death had been different. She really was like a sister to Cinder. They bickered, and discussed the hottest actors on television, and shared books that they liked. Peony was the only person who ever felt like family. Her love had been so pure and innocent— so blind and foolish.

Kai reached forward and held onto Cinder's burned hand. He didn't say a word, but just held it, and Cinder didn't let it go.

Cinder was still furious with Kai for everything he had done. He had stalked her, and dug into her past, and even gone through her most personal items. She may have made up with Cress, but it wasn't his business bringing back her ghosts. He was honest about looking through her stuff and finding the letter, but it was still rude and selfish.

Yes, Cinder was mad at Kai, but there was also something else. She needed someone— someone to just be there for her. She longed to be held. She wanted everything to go away, for the monster to just stay under the bed. Everything was too soon and scary, but Kai was always there to protect her. Kai was her guardian angel, but too human to be perfect at his job.

"It's going to be okay," Kai whispered. His thumb traced careful circles along her hand, and Cinder felt her anger melting away.

"Thanks, Kai," Cinder murmured, her eyes growing hot.

Kai didn't say anything, or even look at her, but he kept hold of her hand. And that was all she needed in that moment.

"If a person is killed by a ghost, and it's super violent, do they come back as a ghost?" Thorne wondered aloud, earning an elbow to the ribs from Iko. "Ow, sheesh, I just want to know if I'll be coming back if Cinder's mom kills me."

"Why would she want to kill you?" Cress asked, before turning red and turning away.

Kai coughed, "I could think of a few reasons why."

"Oh, HAHA, just laugh at the only guy who doesn't have a death wish." Thorne mocked, clapping his hands in the air. "I'm just.." Thorne's blind rage vanished as quickly as the car stopped.

Everyone fell silent as Kai parked the car. Thorne put his hands down, and suddenly he looked ten years younger. Cinder could feel the vibrations flowing from the spot. She could sense her mother, and more importantly, she could sense the fear.

No one said anything as they took in the scenery. It was a park, empty and barren in the dead of winter. Naked trees lined the area, and the wind howled at the blood red sunset. The whole world appeared to stop for that single instant, as if the ghosts had come to pay a visit from the past.

Memories of coming to this same park with her mother swarmed through Cinder's brain. She remembered her playing on the swing set and begging her mom to push her higher. She could picture her mother's beautiful face waiting for her at the bottom of the slide. She could hear her high, cool laughter floating on the wind like a song to the lost.

Cinder was the first to break the silence, never turning to look at the others. "You don't all have to come if you don't want to."

No one answered, so Cinder continued. "Thorne, I know you didn't sign up for this at all. Same for you, too, Iko." Cinder turned to look at Kai, an almost teasing look on her serious face. "You kind of did ask for it, but I won't blame you it you want out. You could all die, and I don't want any of you to feel as if you owe me, because you don't."

"Cress, I know there's no way of talking you out of this, and there's no one else I would rather have by my side." Cinder smiled at her old friend, and Cress smiled back with regret.

"You've all been amazing friends, but you guys should know by now that my friends don't have that long of a life span." Cinder choked out. "I care about you guys, and I don't want any of you to get hurt."

"And we care about you," Cress said instantly. She placed a comforting hand on Cinder's shoulder, and Iko did the same. "So we're all coming with you, whether you like it or not."

Thorne bit his bottom lip, but didn't reject the point. Cinder glance from each of her friends faces. At Cress, both determined and fearless; at Iko, kind and loving; at Thorne, reckless and brave; at Kai, intelligent and supportive. They were her friends, and they weren't going to leave her.

"Alright, then." Cinder nodded her head at each of them. "Let's go."

[ryttu3k]

Part 2 of my season 12 reaction posts! Find part 1 (Resolution of the Daleks to Fugitive of the Judoon) here!

Praxeus

Thoughts on Doctor Who - Praxeus!

OKAY FIRST. THANK YOU, SHOW, FOR FIXING A BIG ISSUE I HAD WITH THE FIRST SEASON. So they were doing a thing where they’d introduce incidentally queer characters, have a female character mention her wife, stuff like that, only for them to die. This episode had Jake and Adam, married/separated/it’s complicated couple, who face huge amounts of danger, who both come close to dying, but who survive! And have a Big Damn Kiss! And walk off together holding hands! They survived!!

Plotwise, I enjoyed it a ton while watching, although in retrospect it did feel a bit free of danger. The companions were never in true peril because the Doctor can home in on them automatically, and we never got the true scale of the risk of infection, since the only people we saw get infected were in isolated areas. I would have liked to see, for instance, the threat of Praxeus spreading beyond just the very Hitchcockian birds; all of the peril was on an individual level.

Good message, if unsubtle. Mind you, that’s kind of Doctor Who’s thing, and it pisses off conservatives, so all for it, really XD (They must have loved the core relationship in this episode, too!) Like. Subtle doesn’t work. There are literally climate change deniers that exist. Sometimes you actually do have to tell a message with all the finesse of a sledgehammer because .

(Side note, I was deeply concerned when I saw the cowriter was the guy who did the hot mess that was Kerblam!, so at least this was just an unsubtle and kind of questionably written story instead of an actively harmful one.)

The companions: Ryan seems a fair bit more confident on his own? His initial scenes with Gabriela showed that he’s starting to work well even without backup, and picking up the bird proved to be a damn good call. Yaz and Graham were a fun pair, and Yaz got a lot to do when she and Gabriela (again!) got to explore, and I can definitely understand the conflict between curiosity/doing what’s right and safety when it came to the teleport scene. She does seem to be bordering on the reckless. Intriguing!

Minor plot snag - Graham knows how to set up an IV, presumably because of the shitload of time he spent in hospital! …And yet he doesn’t know what a pathogen is?

Friend note!

“fun fact about graham seemingly not knowing what a pathogen is! in my reading of the scene, i saw it as graham knowing what one was. with "Well, I’m glad you asked that…!” he seems like he’s actually sort of pleased with himself, like he’s about to launch into an explanation, and then IIRC there’s a very brief shot at Ryan giving him a Look and Graham immediately changes tone to “…cause I didn’t want to look stupid.” he immediately changes from boosting his own ego to bolstering ryans and im love"

In which case, good shit gooood shit.

SFX - the infection was creepy as shit. The very obviously puppet bird near the lab was hilariously bad.

Apparently the filming was tricky because it was super windy so all the shorts of Thirteen with her hair Like That weren’t planned, it just kind of happened. Love a fluffy ruffled Thirteen.

So anyway. People calling for more plot focus - literally this is the Doctor trying to distract herself and not focus on the plot! This is her avoidance tactic! Emotional honesty? Who’s she? She’ll get back to it eventually, but for now she needs a distraction after being punched in the emotions. Give her that for one episode, c'mon.

Ryan: “…I do a lot of running.”

Graham: “Whatever is giving off those weird readings… is on the other side of that wall!” Yaz: *silently turns scanner around* Graham, not skipping a beat: “…is on the other side of that door!”

Yaz: “I don’t want you to panic, but… we followed one of those things through a teleport and now I think we’re on an alien planet.” Thirteen: “…well, you don’t do things by halves!”

Thirteen: “That’s why you smell of dead bird! I thought you’d changed your shower gel.”

Thirteen: “I’m having half a thought. Ooh, this one tickles!”

Thirteen: “What can I say? I’m a romantic~”

In conclusion, Doctor Who said gay rights.

-

Can You Hear Me?

Thoughts on Doctor Who - Can You Hear Me?

Trigger warning for discussion of depression and suicide.

You know you're in for a wild ride when iView warns for horror themes instead of science fiction themes.

Overall: at first impression, it felt sort of mashed together? There's 14th century Aleppo, and there's 21st century Sheffield, and there's a deep space station, and there's creepy monsters and dream villains; I do kind of wonder why Zellin targeted a random girl in Aleppo as source for his pet monster, although targeting people like Ryan's best friend makes sense if he's deliberately trying to lure the Doctor to him.

The theme, on the other hand, of mental health resiliance and reaching out, was done incredibly well. Oh yeah there'll be more comments about it - the Guardian described it as 'adventures in Wokeness' - but damn, sometimes you need to hear it. I loved getting more of Yaz' backstory, about being a desperate teenage runaway at the point of being suicidal, and her reunion with the older woman legitimately made me tear up.

But like, goddamn. Her nightmare - she's still hearing that. She's still hearing her sister saying that she should "do it right this time" and that this time she won't call and that no one is coming and holy fuck. God this makes so many of Yaz' scenes incredibly painful in retrospect, knowing that she was at that point only three years before and that she's still dreaming that shit! It makes her recklessness terrifying!

Ryan's nightmare, and his experience with Tibo - it's quite reflective of the Doctor, too. She wasn't there, and Gallifrey burnt. And Ryan is realising this now, and really thinking about the potential future in Orphan 55. I think this is absolutely foreshadowing Ryan leaving at the end of the season (there's been a lot of speculation given Tosin's new TV role), and I think Ryan and Yaz' discussion at the end of the episode was a definite hint in the direction of Ryan choosing to going back to Earth.

Would have really liked Graham, during his talk with the Doctor, to gently remind her that she can talk about her own problems, although I can understand the narrative choice on why she didn't (although, yeah, would have been good for Graham to ask). Because, yeah, if anyone needs a sympathetic ear (...sans fingers) or a shoulder to lean on, it's her!! The entire theme of this episode was like... reaching out. Conquering your fears with the help of others. Sharing your fears to lessen them. Getting help. And the Doctor deliberately... not doing that makes it into an actual Thing that I think is going to seriously be addressed by the end of the season.

It's been such an ongoing theme. A bunch of episodes have started with an obviously depressed Doctor. The Fam has tried to raise the issue multiple times and have discussed it amongst themselves even more. Scenes like Yaz' reaction after being abducted in Spyfall (...which makes her, "I thought I was dead" part even more worrying) and being comforted by Ryan, not the Doctor... her whole reaction to Graham being like, "I'm glad you talked to me but I literally can't do the same in return" - if it's not addressed by the end of this season, it's at least going to have to be an ongoing theme, because it's becoming very deliberate now.

An interesting note: the actor who played Zellin (an immortal manipulator of nightmares) also voiced the Remnants (who were the first to mention the Timeless Child in The Ghost Monument). Coincidence or deliberate?

Assorted thoughts:

"I'm still quite socially awkward." There's socially awkward and there's emotionally repressed... (I saw a description of it on Tumblr as 'weaponised dissociation' and... yeah. And also yikes.) Also the way she was so closed in on herself, basically hugging her arms to her body! On a semi-related note, talking to herself in Aleppo was a bit depressing. Like it's continuing the theme of The Doctor Does Not Like Being Alone.

The finger thing - ew ew ew ew it's in their EARS ewww D:

Stylistic comment: the traditionally-styled animation for the Immortals' game was gorgeous.

"Try not freak out, yeah, but you're on a floating space platform trapped in a gravitational pull between two colliding planets."

"Thanks for lending a helping hand!" Companions just being, "...Doctor p l s."

On an old lore note, loved the callback to Eternals, Guardians, and the Toymaker! On a concerning note, man, the Doctor has so many issues with immortals. They abandoned Jack, there was the punishment they gave the Family of Blood, they had those Issues with Ashildr (from what I've read), now this, an eternal punishment with no chance of redemption, perhaps because she knows what immortality does? Parallels with the Doctor as quasi-immortal too, which Zellin even pointed out.

"You're wrong about humans. They're not pathetic. They're magnificent. They live with their fears, doubts, guilt. They face them down everyday and they prevail. That's not weakness. That's strength. That's what humanity is."

(Contrast: "That's what humanity is." The Doctor isn't human. She's not prevailing against her fears, doubts, and guilt.)

In conclusion, literally everyone but the creepy immortals needs a hug.

-

The Haunting of Villa Diodati

Thoughts on Doctor Who - The Haunting Of Villa Diodati!

tfw you think you're just going to get a nice spoopy historical and instead get major plot?

Overall impression: Well, Jack is going to be pretty miffed, given that the Doctor had to do precisely what he didn't want to happen - giving the Lone Cyberman what it wanted. To save Shelley, and also to save the future, although that does bring up the question on if the death of one person can rewrite the future, why doesn't that apply to literally everyone? Fletcher the valet and Elise the nurse died too, do their deaths have the same impact? Either way, the Doctor takes the Cyberium for herself - then realises that the Cybermen are inevitable, and returns it. And now she's trying to go and stop them. So... a bit conflicting in the message there, I think.

Yeah. Bit of a Trolley Problem there.

The characters were really fun. I did enjoy seeing Mary's sense of morbidness, but also her kindness and sympathy towards the Cyberman; you can see the foundations of Frankenstein there. I'm seeing some criticism of how Byron was portrayed as a coward, but eh. Nice little callback to Ada. Also I love how one of the rules was 'no one snog Byron'. Put that dirty boy back, you don't know where he's been! Glad Claire realised that too, although historically, she was already pregnant with his daughter at that point (and that didn't go well at all)... Either way. Good display of all these bright young reckless things.

(And yes, they were young. Byron was the eldest at 28. Shelley was 23, Polidori was 20, Mary and Claire were just 18. And while Claire lived to 80 and Mary to her 50s, the three men all died young, too - Byron at 36, Shelley at 29 - yes, from drowning, Polidori at just 25. Also wasn't mentioned that Polidori also created something on that Dark And Stormy Night along with Mary's Frankenstein - he wrote The Vampyre, the first modern vampire story!)

The Lone Cyberman (and I am deliberately using that instead of 'Ashad') - creepy as shit. Not just the whole Frankenstein look, but the way he acted! Not emotionless and blank, but actively manipulative and sadistic! Mary showed empathy and he actively threw it back in her face! I mean, yikes.

House was terrific and also spooky as hell. (Am lowkey miffed that no one went "VIBE CHECK!") The jumbled layout was quite Castrovalva, and I actually really dig that Graham got to see some actual ghosts. Ghostly sandwiches!

I think we got actual confirmation here that Yaz does have feelings for the Doctor? (Bleeding Cool News is pretty sure that it was for Ryan, but... lmao no.) BBCA twitter certainly thinks so!

Claire: "His answers only increase the enigma." Yaz: "I know someone like that." Claire: "This enigmatic person of yours... would you trade them for reliable and dull?" Yaz: "My person's a bit different..."

I MEAN.

(It got deleted. So. There is that.)

Thirteen: "Hmm. Fourteenth... no. Fifteenth century... touch more umami." (Doctor, have you been playing Detroit: Become Human again?)

Mary: "I don't think they're really from the colonies!" Byron: "No, she... is from somewhere much, much stranger." Polidori: "The North."

Thirteen: "YOU HAD ONE JOB."

Cyberman: "You appear courageous. But your vital signs betray a heightened state of anxiety." Thirteen: "Or as I like to call it... Tuesday."

Thirteen: "Yeah, 'cause sometimes this team structure isn't flat. It's mountainous, with me at the summit, in the stratosphere, alone. Left to choose. Save the poet, save the universe. Watch people burn now, or tomorrow. Sometimes even I can't win."

Claire: "You pursued Mrs Doctor without a care for my presence, belittled my thoughts and opinions... and then proceeded to use my person as a human shield." Byron: "...And?" Claire: "And the spell is broken... my lord." Polidori's face: "haha you fucked up dude"

Next week: Shit Hits The Fan.

-

Ascension of the Cybermen

In lieu of a proper post for Ascension of the Cybermen, here are a list of questions we need an answer for.

Will Graham and Yaz survive, on a giant carrier full of Cybermen?

Who is Brendan, and what is his relevance to the story?

What is the Boundary?

How is Gallifrey in the Boundary?

How was the Master in Gallifrey, and not trapped by the Kasaavin?

Who is Ko Sharmus and why am I getting Yana vibes?

Who is Ashad and what is his story? (And why is his theme such a literal banger?)

Is he an actual Cyberman? Because I'm totally getting this impression he's human in armour?

How did Brendan survive being shot, and why did his non-ageing father and mentor do that?

Why did it look like a chameleon arch?

Is Ethan's tech-savvy just warzone familiarity or something more sinister?

Are there any other large human populations left?

Was I detecting a hint of romantic tension between Graham and Ravio?

What's up with Yaz?

Why did the Cyberium get sent to that time period?

Who or what is this alliance Jack is a part of?

How do the Time Lords and the lie of the Timeless Child come into it?

WHO THE FUCK IS BRENDAN?

-

The Timeless Children

WELL THEN.

While I gather proper thoughts on The Timeless Children, here are the questions I had from Ascension of the Cybermen, now with answers!

Will Graham and Yaz survive, on a giant carrier full of Cybermen?

Yup! Disguises for the win!

Who is Brendan, and what is his relevance to the story?

Brendan is a filtered overlay memory of one of the Doctor's former lives.

What is the Boundary?

An anomaly, as far as I can tell.

How is Gallifrey in the Boundary?

No idea!

How was the Master in Gallifrey, and not trapped by the Kasaavin?

No idea!

Who is Ko Sharmus and why am I getting Yana vibes?

A big damn hero.

Who is Ashad and what is his story? (And why is his theme such a literal banger?)

We're still not actually sure. Either way, he's an action figure now.

Is he an actual Cyberman? Because I'm totally getting this impression he's human in armour?

Yeah, sort of.

How did Brendan survive being shot, and why did his non-ageing father and mentor do that?

Because Time Lords.

Why did it look like a chameleon arch?

It's probably related technology! If the chameleon arch rewrites memories, this one just wipes them.

Is Ethan's tech-savvy just warzone familiarity or something more sinister?

Just warzone familiarity. Poor li'l bean.

Are there any other large human populations left?

Possibly! If the Boundary really did send them to random places, there still could be surviving pockets elsewhere in the universe.

Was I detecting a hint of romantic tension between Graham and Ravio?

Maybe a bit XD And now they're all on Earth, who knows?

What's up with Yaz?

Who knows?

Why did the Cyberium get sent to that time period?

Ko Sharmus sent it. Didn't send it far enough.

Who or what is this alliance Jack is a part of?

Same organisation Ko Sharmus is part of. Also, young!Ko Sharmus/Jack please.

How do the Time Lords and the lie of the Timeless Child come into it?

In so many ways.

WHO THE FUCK IS BRENDAN?

The Doctor!

More thoughts later!

-

Thoughts on Doctor Who - The Timeless Children.

...Actually, first thought is the title. Timeless Children? Hmm.

Anyway. That is... sure a literally mind-blowing revelation for the Doctor, yes! Like, damn, the discovery that you're not even the species you thought you were, that your adoptive parent spent lifetimes abusing and experimenting on you, that your memories were routinely erased by people you thought you could trust (including your adoptive parent), that you're literally the progenitor for your entire species, that you've lost who knows how much time and who knows how many memories... yeah. Damn.

What's an appropriate birthday present for someone turning ten million?

Also, huh. Amidst all the old lore and casual mentions (like Borusa!) that got mentioned - were they taking hints from the Cartmel master plan? About the Doctor being some kind of founding figure for Gallifrey? Not exactly written as Cartmel had it, but that big main concept of the Doctor as a sort of... foundation piece of Time Lord culture was still actually there.

Brain of Morbius Doctors confirmed, I guess. I guess even Four was going, "...the fuck?"

Cybermen = still scary. Regenerating Cybermen = felt somehow obscene. Like, no, that's just fundamentally not right. Like the TARDIS responding to Jack by noping the fuck out kind of not right. God. And the Master was completely and utterly magnificently batshit, like, more than usual, come on, dude, you know they'd kill or convert you the second you turned your back.

Still. Deeply, deeply entertaining to watch just from a villain perspective, completely Chaotic, and like... I do understand where he was coming from? His entire life is a lie. His entire life is because of the Doctor, who, I think it's fair to say, he has Complicated Feelings regarding. (Their entire interaction this episode was a giant power play. Like damn guys just get into BDSM and leave the would-be genocide and universal takeover.)

Tecteun = Rassilon, I'm assuming. Goddamn. Like they were a pompous abusive asshole from the outset, this just kind of makes it worse. I also wonder if Rassilon chose the Master specifically to get the drums because he was friends with the Doctor? That actually may have been something the Master worked out himself, too. I mean, I'd be pissed off as well :-\

Also, how many people know about this? I assume Gat knew, since she was implied to be responsible for the mind wipes, but was it like... a super tightly-held secret or was it something a lot of higher-ups knew? Because that's fucked up tbh

Thought on the Master. Okay, he's hugely furious that he's been lied to, that the entire origin of his people is based on a lie, that his greatest friendrivalloveenemy is incredibly special and that a part of her is in him and not in the fun way, but like... I'm also wondering if he's looking at the Time Lords, the way they turned him into their puppet, how they drove him insane for their own purposes, then looked at the Doctor - someone who has also been used, abused, experimented on, manipulated, controlled, and went, "No. This is an injustice and the Time Lords need to be punished for it."

Oh, saw a nice theory regarding the TARDISes - Ruth!Doctor had the original busted police box TARDIS. When she was eventually taken in to be mind-erased, they sent the TARDIS off to storage to be eventually repaired. The Doctor manages to steal that one, goes to Earth, and it immediately gets stuck again because it's still broken. Explains how Ruth!Doctor can have the police box while also being pre-everything.

I really want the Doctor and Jack to sit down and have a nice chat about being timeless undying constants of the universe. Also for Jack to get one of the spare TARDISes around. Be kinda funny if he got the Master's old one, given the Year That Never Was, but it really is just sitting there. (Poor TARDIS stuck as a tree on a random wartorn planet in the far future, though!)

Also, Jodie was fucking magnificent in this episode. The hurt, the absolute fury, the almost glee when she's telling the Master he can't break her, her refusal to press the button at the end (so much like Nine's "coward or killer?" moment!)... just... so good.

Beautiful post I saw here on Tumblr - the Doctor as the Timeless Child, making the choice to help.

Amazing post here on Tumblr about abuse and repressed memories. Even if the Doctor doesn't remember it all, the abuse they underwent at the hands of a beloved parent figure still informs a hell of a lot of their behaviour, but it doesn't define them. The Doctor's need to run = informed by abuse. The Doctor's desire to help crying children = informed by abuse. The Doctor being an inherently good person = being their own person, no matter what their upbringing, no matter what their past was. They made the choice to be the Doctor, and that's a hell of an important thing.

Extremely painful post I saw on Tumblr about the Doctor being 'hip with the kids' by calling her companions her Fam but hell if they're not more family to her than her actual adoptive mother ow my heart.

Also, the scene between Yaz and Graham was so sweet <3 I do want to see Yaz, at some point, admit that sometimes she's so terrified she can barely move, and to tell him what she came so close to doing when she was sixteen, and Graham to just go, "Yeah, but you keep going." Also I'm trying not to think about how Yaz would respond to the Doctor going off on a suicide mission when Yaz was suicidal just three years earlier because ow my heart. She knows that Ko Sharmus went after her, she knows the Doctor might be alive, but either way, she's just seen someone she loves leave with the intention of dying (and Ko Sharmus too, actually). Someone please give her a hug. Actually please just let the Fam have a big group hug in general.

"Have you ever been limited by who you were before?" "Huh. Now that does sound like me talking."

So, remaining questions to be answered next season!

What actually is the Doctor? Since they were found near the Boundary, they could be from anywhere. It's fair to say they now are recognised genetically as a Time Lord, but what were they originally, why were they abandoned in the first place, and are there any more of their original people out there?

How do the Remnants know about the Timeless Child, or were they just picking up on that unconscious knowledge from the Doctor's own mind?

Like... we're generally under agreement that the Master, the eternal cockroach, survived, right? Despite definitely being lowkey suicidal like oh, was hoping the Death Particle would kill me? Like the Death Particle was made by the Cyberium, it could have gone, "Nah, keeping this one."

What's going on with the Kasaavin? Remember them? Still out there, stationed all through time and space? And are we going to see Daniel Barton again?

Is something going on with Yaz?

Will the Fam stay on? (I personally think Ryan will elect to stay on Earth to account for Tosin Cole's new TV role, and if Graham and Ravio enter a relationship, he might too.)

When will we see Jack again? If he was connected to the Lone Cyberman arc, that seems... pretty conclusively finished, unless we're going to learn more about it?

Is it Christmas yet?

............so the Christmas/NY special is going to start with Jack using his vortex manipulator to bust the Doctor out of prison and get back to the Fam and it'll never be mentioned again, right.

"At least buy me diNNER!!"

[prurientpuddlejumper]

Well This is Strange and Unexpected [Toshinori x Reader] [Part 3]

<- Part 2

Summary: You’re feeling guilty over past mistakes and wake up in a bad mood only a certain human golden retriever can cure. 

2,696 words | SFW (but there is some canoodling & severe injury)

Hot tears roll down your cheeks, flowing in burning rivers along the side of your nose, and over your lips, filling your mouth with the taste of salt. Searing pain shoots through your left arm from the elbow up through your shoulder. Every time you move, even in the slightest, unbearable agony rips through your arm and pulses through your whole body like a thing with teeth, consuming you whole. So you sit as still as possible, trying not to move, dreading every breath and every sobbing wail that makes your chest rise and fall, shifting enough to renew the torment.

Your arm is broken, but you don’t understand that. You are four years old, and you have never experienced this kind of pain before.

You just want it to stop.

Mama runs toward you, calling your name. She’ll make it okay again. She’ll help. She’ll make the pain go away. You would do anything to make the pain go away.

She scoops you up in her arms, cooing calming words. Wrapped in her protective embrace, the pain goes away.

You stop crying.

She screams.

“Are you all right?!” A hand shakes your broken arm.

Your eyes shoot open. Lightning blue irises stare back at you from their shadowed sockets.

“No!” you scream, scrambling back until you strike the headboard. “Stay back! Get away from me!”

Toshinori retreats to the door with a yelp, turning his back respectfully and shielding his eyes. “I’m sorry! I wasn’t trying to be creepy, I swear! You were shouting, and I thought...”

Broken? Your arm still throbs with the sensation of being fractured. No. You rub it with your other hand, testing it, and find no pain. Not broken. You knead and stretch the offending limb, massaging away the horrible prickling beneath the skin. You’re fine, you breathe. It’s fine.

Someone is frantically muttering apologies in the doorway.

Crap.

Toshi. He thought you were angry at him. You have to—

You try to hold in a laugh, but, failing, it ungracefully bursts out your nose as a snort.

He is wearing a short pink sweater that shows off his abs, and sweatpants that say “DAT ASS” on the butt.

 ***

A wave crashed behind you, spraying up sea foam and a million jewels of water that reflected the dazzling fire-colored sky silhouetting your entwined forms. If someone had been standing there with a camera, the frozen snapshot of that moment would have made a stunning poster for a heart-throbbing summer romance film.

Unfortunately, time marches on, and in the next moment, you were both soaking wet in water up to your ankles, fleeing, gasping at the shock of freezing water. You laughed about it, but since you hadn’t taken your shoes off to walk on the beach, and the not-quite-summer sun was sinking below the horizon, the walk back to the train was uncomfortably squishy and cold. The damp chill set off Toshinori’s blood-fueled cough nonstop, making other passengers stare, unsure if they were in the beginning of a zombie film.

Huddling close together for warmth the entire way home, however, somehow made all the shivering worth it.

He insisted on getting off at your stop and walking you home—he couldn’t let you go off all alone freezing! In turn, you refused to let him go home covered with goosebumps and hacking up blood everywhere. You lent him some dry clothes, but he is so much taller than you, all of your shirts fit him like crop tops. You’re not sure why he had to pick those sweatpants though. He claimed it was because they were the most comfortable pair, but you didn’t quite believe that reason as he twisted his hips to show off the ass-writing while grinning like an idiot.

“Nope. You are not walking home like that,” you said dryly.

“Aw, come on. I’m adorable.”

“Yes. But someone will beat you up.”

“It wouldn’t be a date with you if I didn’t get beat up.”

“Couch!” you growled, dragging him across the living room and pushing his shoulders down onto the sofa. He was being so goofy all of a sudden. You’d never seen him in such a relaxed, cheerful mood—and it was infectious. You couldn’t resist climbing onto the couch after him, straddling his lap. He folded his arms around your neck and laid back, drawing you down on top of him. Your nose was an inch from his, and your face grew hot with the desire to kiss him again. A throaty hum rumbled in his chest.

This wild-haired scarecrow man smiling up at you between your arms. On your couch. You swallowed, a squeezing in your heart. He was so affectionate, like a stray dog once it warms up to you—like he craved it. And he was good at it.

His hands began to slide up your shirt, watching your face for hesitation. When you let out a shuddered sigh and relaxed more of your weight onto him, he started caressing the curve of your waist and ribs, hands enveloping most of your back—so large for such a slender man, though in proportion with his height. He leaned up, but instead of kissing you, missed your lips and nipped your ear. You let out a pleased gasp, which elicited a devilish grin from him, full of teeth.

Your heart beat faster. You wanted more. You were lying on top of him with his hands under your shirt—it seemed like more was where this was headed, and yet… how could you? The squeezing in your chest tightened; became constricting. He only likes you because he thinks you’re heroic. All that stuff you told him about your quirk, about wanting to help him, that’s what attracted him. Just like his refusal to take advantage of your ability turned you on. But he had the wrong idea. You’re the opposite of heroic. Would he still want you if he knew the real you?

You barely knew him, either, come to think of it. And there you were canoodling like teenagers.

You realized his hands had paused on their path up your back, and his lopsided grin had sunk into a worried frown, tension tugging at the creases of his eyes. The giddy, intoxicated atmosphere between you turned harshly sober. Did he notice your sudden panic, or was he having his own second thoughts?

A PHONE CALL IS HERE! A PHONE CALL IS HERE! A PHONE CALL IS HERE!

Bless that obnoxious ringtone. It broke the silence that had fallen between you, and you both jerked upright, straight as boards, straightening your clothes, a discreet sigh of relief escaping both your lips.

“S-sorry, I need to take this.” He clapped a silencing hand over the phone as he held it to his ear, quickly retreating into the bathroom and closing the door. Apparently, it was private. You could just make out a few hushed words, “All set?”, “...internships…”, “good.”

“Do you have to leave?” You asked as he finished the call. God, you hoped it wouldn’t end on such an abrupt, awkward note.

“No, no, everything is fine, just checking in. I'll actually be free most of the week,” he smiled. “Well, freer than usual, anyway.”

He sat back on the couch next to you. You both flushed again, a bit unsure if the other wanted to resume... whatever was about to happen. “Ah, m-movie?” You offer.

He wanted nothing more than the reprieve of a familiar activity. A movie would be a welcome distraction to cool off from the conflicting uncertainty of moving way too fast. Yet, he couldn’t let the fire be extinguished that easily without paying it proper tribute first.

He took your hand and drew it to his lips, keeping his eyes on you as he kissed each knuckle. Your heart pounded. He smiled mischievously, and let out a chuckle, raising his eyebrows in commiseration, “A movie would be great.”

Less than an hour later, he was snoring softly, mouth hanging half-open. Quietly turning off the television, you tried to disentangle yourself from his arms without waking him. You threw a warm blanket over his gangly form, curled in on itself to keep from spilling over the sides of the sofa. Silently mouthing, “Goodnight,” you tip-toed back to your room.

 ***

“Toshi, wait, it’s not you! I was having a nightmare,” you stretch out your hand to beckon him back, wiping sleep from the corners of your eyes. “And I’m wearing pajamas, you don’t have to hide your eyes,” you add with a yawn.

He had peeked out from behind his hand at your outburst of laughter, suddenly not sure whether he had grievously offended you or not. This new development seems reassuring.

“Sorry for scaring you,” he says, penitent.

You had already startled yourself most of the way out of the covers, so you sit the rest of the way up and throw your legs over the edge of the bed. You shake your head.

“You didn’t. I was just… afraid of hurting you.”

“Hurting me?”

Morning light filters in through the window, casting glowing shapes over the blanket and floor. It’s a sunny day, but your body feels heavy, like there’s a rainstorm outside. Though you’re awake, the nightmare lingers in the air. Its dark clouds had parted momentarily thanks to this enormous puppy dog’s wardrobe choice, but they close in around you again, suffocating.

And there he is—your gaunt, ungainly puppy’s head tilting slightly, trying to figure out what’s wrong. He looks… nervous? He doesn’t know what to do in this situation. It’s weird. Ugh, why are you being like this? He’s too thoughtful, and you’re being weird. Shouting in your sleep and then being all ominous and moody. Taking up his time. Embarrassing.

But you may as well explain.

You recount the dream. Memories, really. Replayed and repackaged a thousand different times courtesy of your brain. The details and facts might change, but the essential truth remains the same: you hurt somebody close to you, and it could happen again.

As you talk, your heartsick expression drives him to sit down next to you and take your hand, massaging your palm between his thumb and fingers.

“You were just a kid. It wasn’t your fault. Kids accidentally hurt people all the time when they manifest their quirks. It can be ugly, but it’s a fact of our super-powered society. You can’t blame yourself.”

Your eyes focus in and out on a pattern on the wrinkled blanket beneath you, where a printed line meets a neat row of stitches. Should you tell him? You chew on the inside of your lips. Does it matter? It was so long ago.

“That wasn’t the only time,” you finally croak, a tightness in your throat. “Remember the I-almost-died story? How I learned my lesson about playing hero and using my quirk more than I could handle? I made it sound like I was the victim. But I left something out that… changes things.”

A villain attack damaged the school. Emergency services hadn't arrived yet and all of your wounded classmates were looking at you like you were the solution to all their problems. And you thought, this is my chance to prove I can save lives. That I’m not a monster who breaks people.

Every part of your body screamed out in agony. You writhed on the ambulance bed like a feral animal blindly lashing out, though every movement shot a crackle of lightning behind your eyes. There was no position you could lay in that didn’t hurt. Each breath was like glass shards rattling in your chest. All rational thought was drowned out by the pain screaming in your ears, burning you like fire. Every moment was more than you could endure.

Only one impulse remained: Make it stop. Please, make it stop.

“A medical technician made the mistake of touching me, and I hurt them. Bad. Just trying to escape my own body—to save myself from my own stupid mistake.

“I always pretend it wasn’t my fault. It was because my classmates kept asking me to help, even though they knew it was hurting me. It was because All Might made it seem noble to grit your teeth and smile through the pain. It was everybody else’s fault for making me go past my limits. Except it wasn’t. I was the one who did it. I was the one who couldn't control myself.”

“Yeah, that was pretty stupid,” he says plainly. Oh. That was blunt. He sighs and tips his head to the side. “Did you want me to scold you for it? It sounds like you already know exactly what you did wrong, and you’ve beaten yourself up plenty.”

It wasn’t the most comforting thing to say—more like he was lecturing a child—but to be honest, if he had sugarcoated it and told you it wasn’t that bad, you wouldn’t have believed him.

“I just... don’t want you to have the wrong impression of me. You probably think I’m a good person, but I’m not. I’m a villain!”

He actually laughs. Then he sees your face.

Toshinori’s eyes flick wide in a moment of panic, realizing he was being callous, before instantly transforming into comfort mode. He puts his arm around your shoulders. You hadn’t realized you were on the verge of tears until you instinctively turn and bury your head in his chest. Dark wet spots appear on the borrowed sweater where your face presses into it.

“You are not a villain, young lady.” He kisses the top of your head, nuzzling your hair. “Nothing like one.”

“But I still used my quirk, even after all that, knowing it could have happened again. When I make a mistake, people get hurt. And I broke the law! I’m not licensed!”

“It was to help someone you saw in need. You reacted. It was brave, especially knowing how worried you must have been about using it.”

“Yeah? I doubt All Might would see it that way.” Your words, hitched and muffled in the pink sweater, are needlessly sharp, but you don’t care about insulting his stupid idol right now. “Any hero would still just see illegal public quirk use. There's only good and evil with heroes, no in between, and clearly I'm on the wrong side.”

His grip around you becomes fiercer, his teeth gritting, like he’s trying to squeeze the sadness out of you. “I am absolutely certain he would not want you to feel that way. Only an idiot would think you're evil.”

Well, All Might is an idiot, you think, but don’t say, choosing instead to bury your face into his chest again. Even if you could speak through the crushing pressure of his arms, you wouldn’t want to spoil the moment, or end the comforting, consuming weight of his embrace. When he finally lets up, you gasp for air. He takes your shoulders firmly but reassuringly, hands so large his thumbs rest tenderly on the sides of your neck. He blinds you with his bright blue eyes.

“When you make a mistake, you learn from it, and keep moving forward.”

His voice is so deep and confident, yet so gentle. The way he says it makes it sound easy, and the heavy storm clouds begin to evaporate into the morning air.

“Just move forward, huh?”

He nods. “It’s a dangerous gift you have, but you weren’t afraid to use it when someone needed help. In fact, you insisted you’d use it again in an emergency, even if I told you not to.” He smiles warmly, his thumbs ghosting up and down the crook of your neck. “Why is that?”

You slowly let out a breath. “Because I know my limits now, and how to defend my boundaries. I know I won’t lose control again.”

“That doesn’t sound like a villain at all,” he lifts a brow.

“No… I guess not.” You wipe your eyes on your pajama sleeves, sniffling. “Dammit, you squeezed the sad out of me!” You laugh. He’s a little confused, but glows when he sees you smiling again.