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agh82701 · 2 years ago
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Harry Potter but everything is happy:
It was an ordinary Wednesday in Godric's Hollow except today was what the muggles called Halloween. Those in the Wizarding world called it All Hollows Evening. It was a night of feasting, parties, and games, yet Lily and James Potter kept to themselves. This year, they were targets. Or rather, their first son, only a year and a few months old, was a target. A prophecy made the year prior declared that the son of people who had defied the Dark Lord three times born at the end of the seventh month was the only one that could bring about his downfall. Now, Lily and James had defied the Dark Lord three times and Harry had been born on July thirty-first, but Neville Longbottom, born on the thirtieth, son to Alice and Frank Longbottom, who had also fought and defied the Dark Lord three times over could have also fulfilled the prophecy. Between the two boys, something had compelled the Dark Lord to pick Harry as the one the prophecy was talking about. This is why the Potters decided to lay low this year for Halloween. They had placed a curse on their house to make themselves unfindable to anyone unless their secret keeper, James' best friend Sirius Black, told them where they were. Sirius, however, had talked with his and James' other friend, Peter Pettigrew, and had ultimately decided that Peter would make a better secret keeper and Sirius would go into hiding with the Potter family. Unfortunately, Peter stabbed his friends in the back and told the Dark Lord where their house in Godric's Hollow was. On that fateful Halloween night, the Dark Lord made his move.
As the Dark Lord crept into the Potter's home, he stepped on an unfortunate floorboard that creaked under his weight, alerting James and Lily to his presence. James whipped out his wand, ran downstairs, and killed the Dark Lord where he stood, frozen in the shame of failing to stay stealthy. Harry remained asleep in his mother's arms the whole time.
10 years later-
"Harry!" Cried Charlotte, climbing on top of Harry. "Uncle Paddy and Uncle Moony are here! They want to go with us to King's Cross to see you off to school!" Harry who had been fast asleep and dreaming of his own face on chocolate frog cards was now wide awake. Not only because his little sister had jumped on top of him but because Paddy and Moony were here. They weren't really his uncles, but they may as well have been, they were his parents' best friends, Sirius and Remus Lupin who still used the nicknames they had made for each other in their days at Hogwarts, Sirius being Padfoot for his animagus as a dog, and Remus being Moony as an allusion to his lycanthropy. Harry leaped out of bed and ran downstairs to his family.
"There's our first year," beamed Sirius as Harry came into view. "Ready for your first year at Hogwarts?"
"Yeah," said Harry who though excited, had a stomach full of Cornish pixies. He sat down at the table next to Remus who was nursing a very pale cup of coffee as Lily set a plate of toast in front of her son and tousled his hair. Harry began to eat his breakfast when his father and sister joined them at the table.
"Now Harry," started Remus. "Your Uncle Paddy and I have something for you, not a going away present, but just to make sure everything is okay at school." He reached under the table and pulled out a birdcage in which perched a beautiful snowy white owl. Harry gasped. He could not believe it, his very own owl.
"Your mother said you could use the school owls but I wouldn't have. My godson has to have his own owl if he's going to keep us updated with all the trouble he gets into," exclaimed Sirius with a smile.
"That's if he's anything like you three while you were in school," Lily said glaring not only at her husband but his best friends as well. "Harry is a perfectly well-behaved boy and he'll get top marks in his classes."
"So was James before he met Sirius," said Remus under his breath so only Harry and Charlotte could hear. The three of them giggled as Lily shot Remus a look that could only say "I'll see to you later about the owl."
"Well, what's her name, Harry?" Asked James clapping his son on the shoulder.
"I don't know," Harry said, still in awe that this owl was his. "I have no idea,"
"Well, you better come up with something. We have to leave for the station in an hour and a half."
Harry wasn't anywhere close to being fully packed for school. His robes were everywhere and his class books were still wrapped up in the thick brown paper from the bookshop. He picked up the stack of books by the string tying the paper up and the paper tore open as the weight of the books tipped to one side. The books came crashing to the floor, half of them landing open. A flash of white flew by Harry's face and landed on one of the open books. His owl must have heard the books fall and come to check out the noise. Picking up his textbooks, the owl sat peacefully on A History of Magic knowing that her owner was safe.
"What are you sitting on?" Asked Harry as he gave the owl a pat on the head. She flew back out the bedroom door and out of sight as Harry read the page that was now a bit crinkled from the large bird that had just used it as a chair. It was about a German witch from the middle ages. Hastily, Harry threw his loose books, wrinkled robes, school supplies, and brand-new wand into his trunk and headed back to the kitchen.
"You all ready?" Asked Lily. "I packed you some lunch for the train, just a sandwich and a few sickles to get some sweets from the trolley," she held out a small paper package to Harry who now couldn't contain his excitement.
"Is it time to go yet?" He asked his parents.
Remus let out a chuckle, "He is definitely your son Lily, I don't think James has ever been that excited to go to school,"
"He was for our seventh year when we had spent all summer making a list of pranks we couldn't wait to pull," Sirius said eyeing James with a smile.
"Slow your roll kid," James said to Harry, "You hardly ate breakfast," Harry took his seat between Remus and Charlotte once again and nibbled at his eggs and toast.
"Thanks for the owl," Harry said between bites. "I picked out a name for her,"
"You named your owl Paddy after me? That's so kind of you," Sirius teased.
"No," protested Harry with a giggle, "Her name is Hedwig,"
The six of them arrived at King's Cross at a quarter to eleven and made their way to the column between platforms nine and ten. They meandered around until the coast was clear of muggles and slipped quietly into the column and onto platform nine and three quarters. Harry had been on the train plenty of times when his parents had taken him to Hogsmead for their annual Christmas shopping trip, but he had never been on the Hogwarts express. The scarlet engine let out a huge puff of steam as Harry loaded his trunk and Hedwig onto the carriage right in the middle.
"Why can't I go with Harry?" Charlotte whined.
"You'll go when you're eleven," explained Lily.
"That's so long away,"
"It's only 2 years Char," Harry said hopping off the train to say his goodbyes to his family. "When I'm a third year, you'll be a first year. Then I can show you all around the castle." This idea pleased Charlotte as she smiled and gave her big brother a hug.
"Now, you be safe," Lily said motherly, "and write to us as much as you can,"
"He'll be fine Lily," James said comforting his wife as she teared up at the idea of sending her first child to school, "He's a Potter. If he doesn't have your brains he has to have my knack for mischief. He can take care of himself." Harry hugged his parents and his uncles one last time as the warning whistle sounded at two minutes to eleven. He climbed onto the train and into a compartment that was empty except for one very red-haired boy who was hanging halfway out the window. Harry made his way to the window as well and the boy made room. As the train started to pull away from the station, they both waved and yelled at their families one final goodbye.
"I'm Ron Weasley," the boy said as they took their seats. "Are you a first year too?"
"Yeah," said Harry, thankful he was with someone his own age. "I'm Harry,"
"You know, you look just like that Potter guy who killed the Dark Lord," Ron said squinting at Harry.
"Yeah, I get that a lot. He's my dad. I'm Harry Potter,"
"No way! That's so cool! What's he like?" Ron's eyes were full of awe and wonder.
"I dunno, he's just my dad," Harry laughed. Who would have known the first person he met would be a fan of his parents'?
The two boys talked about their families, the Weasley family having six sons and one daughter, Harry saw his own family as quite small. When lunch time rolled around, both Harry and Ron pulled out the lunch their mothers packed.
"Ew," exclaimed Ron. "Corned beef. She always forgets how much I hate it."
"I'll trade if you want. I just have ham," Harry offered. The boys swapped sandwiches as they heard a rattling in the corridor.
"Anything from the trolley dears?" A witch pushing a squeaky-wheeled cart full of candy asked.
"No sorry," said Ron looking a bit disappointed.
"I'll get you something," said Harry. "Can I have some chocolate frogs and a pumpkin pastie?" Not five minutes later were all the frogs opened and the boys comparing their trading cards from inside the wrapping.
"Has anyone seen a toad? A boy named Neville is looking for his," a young girl with fluffy brown hair appeared in the doorway to the compartment startling both Harry and Ron.
"I haven't," Harry said. "Have you?"
"None that aren't made of peppermint. Those are on the trolley," Ron started laughing at his own joke as the girl glared at him.
"Well, anyways, I'm Hermione. Hermione Granger. You know, we're almost there you should probably put on your robes," she disappeared almost as quickly as she arrived, bouncing off to the next compartment to ask the same question.
"Well," said Ron with a sigh. "She's something. A Ravenclaw I bet."
"Oh yeah, what house are you hoping for?" Harry had completely forgotten about the sorting.
"My whole family has been Gryffindor I think I'd be a disappointment to them if I wasn't."
"Same here. My parents, my uncles Moony and Paddy, I have to be Gryffindor." With the thought of the sorting at the front of his mind, the rest of the train ride flew by and before Harry knew it, the Hogwarts gamekeeper Rubeus Hagrid was beckoning all the first years toward him. Harry was thankful to see a friendly face which eased his nerves about starting school.
Hagrid was a friend of his parents and had come around for dinner a few times, even more over this past summer holiday to tell Harry everything about Hogwarts and what to expect. His mother, Lily, was a muggleborn and grew up going to a muggle primary school. She had decided that it was best for Harry to be exposed to the muggle world before going to Hogwarts, therefore Harry attended the same primary school his mother and Aunt Petunia did. Harry could only hope that dinners with Hagrid would help ease Harry into Wizarding school.
Hagrid lead the gaggle of eleven-year-old wizards to the lake that stood between the castle and the train station. They all climbed into small wooden boats and Hagrid guided them towards the school. Harry looked up at the tallest turret. The towers looked taller than they had from the streets of Hogsmead. He felt another surge of anxiety and looked over at Ron and could tell they felt the same.
The massive front doors to the school stood looming in front of them and Harry gulped nervously. He hadn't been nervous until now but the sorting ceremony was about to start. A young witch walked the first years to the front of the Great Hall where a stool sat with a wrinkled pointy leather hat perched on top. A witch with square glasses and emerald green silk robes stood behind the podium at the front of the hall at the professors table.
"Welcome first years," she said smiling at all of them. "I am your headmaster, Professor McGonagall." She went on to explain the sorting ceremony which Harry mostly zoned out for, distracted by the enchanted ceiling above. He only snapped back to reality when he heard a name he knew. Hermione, the girl from the train, got Gryffindor, as well as Neville Longbottom, a boy Harry had met a few times since their parents were friends. He clutched a squirming toad in his lap as he got sorted and Harry realized it was Neville's toad that was lost on the train. Finally it was Harry's turn.
He slowly walked up to the stool and the sorting hat was placed on his head. Harry began to panic. What if he wasn't Gryffindor? What if he was placed in Slytherin?
"Don't worry about the what-ifs," a grumbly voice said in Harry's head. "Whatever house I put you in, you'll fit in,"
"Please, please, please," Harry pleaded.
"You could do well in Slytherin,"
"No!" Harry's mind screamed.
"And Hufflepuff could be a good fit,"
"No no no no no," his panic grew. "Please, Gryffindor," he knew his family would love him regardless of his house, but he had to be Gryffindor, he had to keep the family legacy. "I'm a Gryffindor," he told the hat.
"Well well, bold of you to tell me what I know," the hat whispered to Harry. "Gryffindor!" It cried loud enough for the whole hall to hear. The table at the far right of the hall erupted in cheers. Harry grinned ear to ear and sat next to Hermione and two identical red-haired boys that Harry assumed were Ron's brothers, Fred and George, whom he had heard about on the train. The end of the alphabet approached and Ron was sorted into Gryffindor as well. His brothers whooped and hollered and Harry cheered. It was going to be a good school year.
And it was. Harry and Ron were best friends and their duo turned into a trio turned into a quartet as they grew closer to Hermione and Neville. Fred and George were the pranksters of the Weasley family, but that didn't stop Ron from getting into his own mischief and Harry followed in his footsteps. One night, Harry found an intricately folded square of parchment in the side pocket of his book bag. He unfolded it and another slip of parchment fell out.
I solemnly swear I'm up to no good
Harry read it out loud and the larger bit of parchment blossomed with maroon ink. Harry was face to face with his father and uncle's legacy. The marauders' map. Harry took it upon himself to explore all the secret passageways the map marked out for him. He wasn't taking after his mother or father. He was taking after uncle Moony.
While at Hogwarts, Lily was a star student. Sirius and James got in their fair share of trouble. But Remus kept his name clear. In public, Remus was like Lily. The top of their class, both prefects. But when he was alone with his friends, Remus was the brains of all the pranks. Harry filled this role in his friend group, while Hermione and Neville were the ones that had their noses in books studying to get the best grades, and Ron was always getting caught getting into trouble. Harry was Ron's cover. He got good enough grades for the professors to like him but the marauders' map and the invisibility cloak he had snuck out of the hall wardrobe that belonged to James, made him as sneaky as can be. As Ron got in more trouble, Harry shared his sneaky secrets. They hung out in the shrieking shack and all kinds of other off limits places and even got Hermionie and Neville to join them sometimes. The four of them were made for each other. Harry and Ron made sure Hermionie and Neville loosened up to have some fun, while they made sure Harry and Ron did their homework and kept their grades up, helping them where they struggled.
Ron's younger sister Ginny joined them the next year, and Charlotte the year after that. The following year brought the Triwizard Tournament. A seventh-year Hufflepuff named Cedric got selected to represent Hogwarts and Harry and his friends cheered him on to victory. Ron and Hermionie were made prefects in their fifth year, which everyone laughed at since out of all the Gryffindor fifth years, Ron had gotten in the most trouble the four years previous. McGonagall had her faith in Ron, thinking being made prefect would whip him into shape, however, pranks became more elaborate as Ron got roped into Fred and George's growing joke business. The next two years were uneventful as O.W.L. and N.E.W.T. exams took up most of their time. They all graduated with honors and went on to careers at the Ministry of Magic. Ron and Harry became Aurors hunting down groups that tried to emulate the Dark Lord. Hermionie, born to muggle parents, went into muggle relations which was her specialty since she didn't even know about the Wizarding world until she turned eleven. Neville was a herbology researcher with a focus on antidotes. Ginny joined Weasleys Wizard Wheezes as the twins' financial advisor and Charlotte had fallen in love with the care of magical creatures while in school so she was on a path to working at a dragon sanctuary with one of Ron's many brothers, Charlie.
Everyone was happy and all was well.
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fredgeorgegredfeorge · 3 months ago
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Green-Eyed Monster | F.W.
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For the first time ever, Fred Weasley finds himself jealous over the only person in the world he needn’t worry a bit about.
Pairing: Fred Weasley x f!reader
Word count: 8k
Warnings: SMUT 18+, unprotected sex, oral + fingering (f!receiving, (lots of) dirty talk, name calling, praise/degradation, dom/sub dynamic, some nipple play, touch of a breeding kink, possessiveness/jealousy, some toxic themes, established relationship, swearing, drinking, arguing, angst, fluff, sorry if miss any!
first hp fic in a very long time! what better to post than this mess (jealous, possessive, sexy mess). basically pwp—let me know what you think! (Barely edited at all lmao my apologies)
You sat quietly at George’s desk, eyes focused on a piece of parchment as you both tried to break down the recipe George had scribbled down. There was a hiccup, a hitch in the plan of brewing a batch of Euphoria Elixir for the joke shop, and it was pushing back your plans to place them on the shelves this week. After a few hours of quiet deliberation on his lonesome, George decided to seek your help in hopes of speeding up the process.
So, the two of you put your heads together and re-read the ingredient list a million times, wondering how the hell it turned out murky green instead of sunshine-y yellow. The cauldron sat smoldering across the room, a rain cloud above it as the bubbly mixture spilled over the sides. Upon first glance, you had stated the absolute obvious.
“Isn’t that supposed to be a rainbow?” You raised an eyebrow, looking at your brother-in-law as he collapsed in his chair.
“Yes, you git.” George rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. You shot him a sharp look, warning him to be nice if he wanted your help. You knew George didn’t mean any of the insults—he was simply frustrated and maybe even a little embarrassed that he could not figure it out by himself. “Sorry, Y/N.” He conceded, realizing he came on a bit too strong.
“S’alright.” You assured him, stepping towards the desk where he sat. “Where’s the ingredient list? We’ll start there.” You offered, knowing you would help no matter how poor of a mood he was in. You loved George almost as much as you loved Fred, if you had to compare. Even if it was in a different way, you had a hard time refusing him when he used the same charm tactics as his twin brother.
After spending so many years in a relationship with Fred, it would be obscure for you not to have a bond with the closest person to him. Over the years, he’d surpassed a friend and had grown into your own brother. You were certain that no matter where life took you and Fred, George would always hold a special place in your heart. When the two opened their shop in Diagon Alley, you volunteered most of your free time to help them in any way you could, and whether it was tweaking new products or doing some of the dirty work, you never really minded.
That evening in specific, Fred was off on some ‘official business’, which really just meant meeting with a potential product buyer at The Leaky Cauldron. Last month, George took the burden of doing so, and they decided it was only fair for him to do it this time. Unfortunately for you, as much as you loved supporting them, it did interfere with your evening plans with him. So, sulking and trying your best to swallow it down, you distracted yourself with stocking shelves downstairs to prepare for another busy day ahead.
You were actually near grateful when George emerged from the office, calling out to you in desperation. It gave you a break from the monotonous back and forth, and someone to talk to. If it could not be Fred, you decided George was the next best.
“So, what’d’ya think it could be?” George asked, peeking over the cauldron that was still spitting back at him. He dodged out of the way, trying his best not to get any of the splashback on his new jumper.
“Well, from what you’ve told me, seems like you put all the right stuff in.” You deducted, pursing your lips slightly as you read over the list for what seemed like the millionth time. “Sad as it sounds, I doubt we can save it now, even if we figure out what happened.” You said, recalling your potions knowledge that Snape had relayed over the years.
“Right, but I’d like to know what’s wrong before I try again.” He explained, taking a moment to look over your sad expression. His eyebrows furrowed, his head cocking to the side as he tried to figure out where it was coming from. “What’s got your knickers in a twist?” Your eyes flickered upwards to meet his, your cheeks tinged red from the heat of the room. Your lips dipped into a frown as you shrugged your shoulders, brushing him off so you did not need to explain yourself. “I know you better than that. Come on, now.” He urged, placing his palms flat against the desk as he leaned towards you, a challenging look in his eye.
You narrowed your brows, keeping a stony expression as you met his gaze. “What’s it to you, Weasley?” You shot back, unsure of where your defensive nature was coming from. Perhaps you weren’t willing to discuss your relationship problems with your boyfriend’s twin brother, or maybe it was because you felt foolish for being upset at all.
“Reckon we’re past that, hmm? Your problems are our problems, and all.” He responded, also unsure of why you were being so reserved with your thoughts. Usually, you were an open book, especially with the two of them.
“My problems aren’t your problems, Georgie.” You shook your head, shutting down the ridiculous notion. “Let’s get back to the real problem, yeah?”
“No, I don’t think so.” George disagreed, his concern now over something completely different. “Is it about Fred?” At that, the tips of your ears began to burn and you shifted uncomfortably in your seat. “Ah, I see.” A devious smile crossed his lips.
“It’s not a big deal.” You covered your tracks, tapping the ink-less quill against the worn parchment.
“I have a hard time believing you, considering you just lied to me.”
“Lied is a strong word,” you rolled your eyes, quickly realizing that there would be no escaping the conversation. “I didn’t lie about anything.”
“What’s he done?”
“Nothing!” You exclaimed, a dry laugh leaving your lips. “It’s just… I’m just being dramatic.” And it’s true, you were being dramatic. Well, maybe not fully, but that’s what you were trying to convince yourself of. “I just miss him, I suppose. I know you both have been busy, but I think maybe I underestimated how busy you would actually be.” You continued, knowing it was wrong to confide in his twin brother about your relationship issues. Still, it felt good to get it off your chest, to voice the concern and have someone shoot you down, just so you knew you were being irrational. “This is the third night in a row we’ve canceled our plans. I’ll get over it. It’s no big deal.”
“That’s a big deal.” He hummed, sympathizing with you to make you feel better. “Bloody inconsiderate, if you ask me.” But you weren’t asking him, and somehow his justification of your feelings only made you feel worse. “What? Not allowed to speak my mind?”
“No—“ you let out a defeated sigh, slumping down in your seat. “I know that, but I was hoping you would tell me I’ve gone mad, instead.”
“Blimey, Y/N, you’re allowed to be upset. We're busy, yeah, but you’re still his girlfriend.” George said, jumping slightly when the rain cloud above the cauldron let out a crack of thunder. “If you’d rather, we can forget the elixir and grab dinner instead. I’m not Fred, but I’m pretty damn close.” He gave you a cheeky smile, earning an honest laugh from you.
“S’alright, Georgie. Thank you, though.” You appreciated his kindness, but you were sure it would only make your predicament even worse, considering Fred’s recently acquired short-fuse when it came to you and George spending so much time together. It was odd for him to be so protective, so jealous of the one person in the world he needn’t worry about, but it seemed as though the new trait was permanent. Perhaps it came from the fact he was also missing you due to your busy schedules, and how it sometimes seemed you and George were most often left at the shop alone.
“You know, I have noticed that lately.” George continued, leaning against the desk as he reminisced over the last few weeks. “Always seems to be us stuck here together.”
“Mhm.” You mumbled, slowly realizing that you weren’t as insane as you previously thought if he was noticing all of the same things. “Let’s just figure this out so I can get home.”
So you did. A grueling hour spent recounting George’s every step in brewing the elixir left the two of you puzzled and even more frustrated. By that point in the night, you were hunched over the long list of his steps you had jotted down so you could (hopefully) discover what he missed.
“I dunno, Georgie.” You sighed. “Seems like you did everything—“ you cut yourself off, leaning closer to the page on the desk as you caught something you hadn’t seen before.
“What?” He asked, his head snapping towards you. “What is it?”
“You said when you let it simmer, it was turquoise.” You said, looking up at him.
“Yeah, so?” He replied, confused why it was such a big deal.
“It’s meant to be blue.” You explained, a grin on your face as you relayed the information to him.
“Turquoise… blue… same thing, innit?” He asked, standing and walking over to you.
“Maybe to you.” You giggled, pointing to the piece of paper where he missed the step. “After you add the shrivelfig, you have to stir it until it changes color.” He walked up behind you, placing one hand on your arm as he leaned over your opposite shoulder. He smelled of butterbeer, likely due to the one he’d been nursing the entire time you sat together. You immediately noticed the warmth of his body, how similar it felt to how Fred touched you, but how drastically different it was all the same.
“Blimey, you’re right!” He exclaimed, his voice still soft so he was not yelling in your ear. “What would I do without you?” He gave your arm a gentle squeeze, leaning closer and pressing the side of his face to yours in a makeshift hug. His hand dropped to your back, lingering there as the conversation continued.
“It’s nothing, really.” You smiled, closing your eyes to enjoy the warmth for a moment. “So now you know. You can do it again, but make sure to stir it until it’s blue. By tomorrow, we’ll have it bottled and on the shelves just like we planned.”
“Our number one girl, saving the day yet again.” He sighed in relief. “I better get to it—“
Before his thought could finish, the door to the office swung open, cutting him short. Your eyes turned upwards, landing on a slightly drunken version of the boyfriend who’d abandoned your evening plans. The gloss of his eyes and the goofy smile on his lips led you to believe so, and the redness on the apples of his cheeks only solidified it. Only his cheeky grin didn’t last too long when he processed the scene in front of him, how close the two of you were, how heavy George’s hand seemed on your back and how rosy your own cheeks were.
Quickly, his jaw tightened, his gaze narrowing as he tried to decipher the whole situation. His nostrils flared ever so slightly, and his arms raised to cross over his chest. Immediately, you knew what you’d be in for; a long, tiresome argument that changed absolutely nothing. Instead of fighting the silent accusations, defending yourself for no real reason at all, you watched him with the same intensity while you awaited a snide comment.
“So what’s all this, then?” Fred asked, his face clearly conveying all of his emotions.
“Helping Georgie make the elixir while you were off getting sloshed at The Leaky Cauldron.” You muttered, noticing George straighten himself up in hopes of avoiding any further damage.
“I was not getting sloshed, I was doing business.” He corrected, defensive over the fact. “S’pose you were hoping I’d take a little longer, yeah? Give you some more time to cozy up with my brother?”
“Blimey, Fred. If you took any longer, I’d imagine you’d have to move in with the lad.” George took your side on the matter. “At least she wouldn’t have to worry about you missing dinner again.” At that, Fred’s eyes cut to you, immediately understanding where the underlying tension was coming from.
“Is that right?” Fred’s voice was no louder than a whisper, all of the pieces clicking together in an instant. “I don’t suppose the two of you had dinner? Let him fill in for me while I was gone?”
“No, we did not.” You snipped, standing as you gathered the ingredients for George’s second attempt at the brew.
“Yeah, right. What else did he fill in for, sweetheart? Anything you think I should know?” At that, your eyes widened and your face turned red. Your entire body felt like it was engulfed in flames, appalled that he would even think such a thing.
“Piss off, Fred.” You muttered, stepping out from behind the desk as tears stung your eyes. George shot you a sympathetic look as you pushed past his brother and out into the stairwell. You trodded down to the main level, swiping fallen tears away from your cheeks as you rushed out the front entrance of the building.
The cool air of the night was nice, especially after spending so long cramped up in the tiny office space, but it was not as freeing as you might have hoped once you heard footsteps following behind you. Without acknowledging him, you pulled your keys from your pocket, hoping that maybe he forgot his own set and you wouldn’t have to deal with his drunken arguments tonight if you got inside before him.
Of course, you knew that was childish and cruel, because despite being upset with him, loving him was the only thing you knew how to do. You unlocked the front door, holding it open with your boot-clad foot as he stumbled his way behind you. As soon as he passed through the doorway, you continued on your journey to ignore him and tossed your keys on the counter.
“Hey,” Fred reached out, his warm hand landing on your arm, stopping you from running any further from him.
“What?” You snapped, immediately regretting the harshness of your tone. He recoiled at the sound, shocked that you spoke to him in such a way. Usually the two of you saw eye to eye on everything, and in your long standing relationship arguing had never been your thing. Until you left school, you were certain the two of you had never been angry at each other, ever.
“What the bloody hell was that about? I leave for a few hours, and the two of you get on like that? Does that happen every time I step out?” You couldn’t help but roll your eyes again, wondering why this became such a problem in the few short months you’d been graduated.
“Merlin, Fred. You’re acting like you caught us in a broom closet.” You tried again to make your way to the bedroom, unwilling to argue a point he knew was blasphemous anyhow. “We were working, not fucking.”
“Yeah, but I bet you would’ve let him, right?” He grabbed your hand, spinning you back around to face him. He pulled you into him, his athletic build never leaving him even after he stopped playing quidditch. “Bitching and moaning cause I couldn’t be home to take you to dinner… if you were so upset, why didn’t you come to me, princess? Tell me what was wrong?” You could smell fire whiskey on his breath, feeling his chest heaving with anger against your own. As angry as you were, you couldn’t help but feel a rush of arousal run through you. The slight sneer on his face, the fire in his eyes, and the protective hold he had on you was sending your head spinning with thoughts much less pertinent to the topic at hand.
“Maybe I would have if you spared me the time of day.” You argued, finding yourself short of breath as you realized just how much he towered over you. “But, as it seems, you’ve been too damn busy to spare me a second glance.”
“Christ, when did you get so needy?” His rebuttal came easy, like he’d been waiting to have this fight for weeks. “Weren’t satisfied at home, so you thought my brother could do it for you?”
“Are you daft?” You hissed, feeling his fingers tighten on your hips. You hated that the feeling made you forget about your troubles, urging you to push the argument to the side and settle it in a better, more pleasurable way. “If that’s what I wanted, you think I’d be up here arguing with you?”
“That depends, sweetheart. Were you planning on getting caught?” He raised an eyebrow, the thud of his heart against his chest letting you know just how worked up he was. There was no way he truly believed you would do that to him, especially after all you had been through together. You wondered if maybe the lack of time spent with each other was getting to him, souring his thoughts because he missed you just as much as you missed him. “We may be identical, Princess, but he could never give you what I can.”
You hated to admit it, but for some strange reason, jealousy looked really good on him.
“What, a headache and a poor mood?” You decided to play his game if he wasn’t willing to listen to reason. If he wanted to fight, you could do it too. “I’m sure he could manage. In fact, he could probably do a hell of a lot more.” That seemed to strike a nerve in him, pushing him over the edge in an instant and changing the entire mood hanging heavy in the room. He no longer wanted to talk, but rather prove a point.
He took a step backwards, never easing his hold as he pushed you towards the kitchen table. He didn’t stop until your ass hit the edge, a mischievous look in his eye replacing the earlier annoyance. He had you locked in place, no intent to back down as he stared down at you over the bridge of his nose. Then, a small smirk turned the corner of his lips, leading you to believe he was also thinking of a much more simple way to solve your problems.
“Maybe you just need a reminder of who you belong to, yeah?” He asked, his voice quieter than it was before. You felt your mouth run dry, your eyes never leaving his as a dull ache between your legs began to pester you.
That would make you feel better, but he had pissed you off enough that you wanted to refuse him the satisfaction.
“Maybe we should get Georgie up here. According to you, he’d be the one to set me straight.” There was a slight venom in your tone letting him know you wouldn’t be letting anything go so easily. A low chuckle shook his shoulders, his eyes gleaming with a sinister look you weren’t sure you’d ever seen from him before that night. He shook his head ever so slightly, playing into you as he reached one arm behind you.
Your heart raced as you awaited a response, wondering if maybe you pushed him too far and crossed a boundary you could not double back on. You didn’t have to wonder long, because without a second thought, he cleared all of the items littering the table with one swift move of his arm. Papers scattered everywhere, floating through the air and landing all over the floor. Broken products and half finished merchandise for the shop tumbled off the edge, falling less than gracefully onto the tile below. Without ever breaking eye contact, he raised an eyebrow, daring you to say it again.
“You think he can fuck you better than I can?” He asked, giving you the opportunity to change your mind.
“Right now? Yeah.” You spat, wondering if he’d ever drop the act and get on with his day. “Seems like all you want to do is get on my nerves.”
“Yeah?” He challenged, his face so close to yours you could feel his breath on your skin. The tip of his nose grazed your own, his normally warm and comforting irises engulfed by his lust-blown pupils. Or perhaps it was anger that gave him the new look—you weren’t quite sure. “You’d rather go home with him at night? Wake up next to him every morning? Is that really what you want, princess?” He taunted, knowing very well that your heart was his, even if he found himself caught up in a few moments of doubt.
Still neglecting to give him any gratification, you nodded your head despite the sickening feeling that washed over you at the thought. As if he called your bluff before you ever said it aloud, he laughed at the certainty in your action, which only seemed to anger you further.
“If that’s the case, seems like I’ve got my work cut out for me tonight.” He responded, brushing the comment off as if it were nothing. If there was one thing Fred couldn’t ever turn down, it was a challenge, and since coming upstairs with you, it was only further proven to him that’s all this was. “Maybe I’ve gotten too comfortable, sweetheart. After so long, you think you’d know that you’re mine, huh?” Before he continued his tyrant, he used his hands on your hips to lift you onto the table with ease. The ache between your legs had grown stronger, more intense and impossible to ignore. You could feel the wetness soaking through your panties, and the thought of his strong arms lifting you so carelessly only made you spiral further. “Maybe I expect too much of you.” He theorized, recognizing the gleam in your eyes because he’d seen it a thousand times before.
He let his hands trail under the hem of your jumper, settling on the button of your jeans as he undid it with ease. You never let your eyes trail from his face, realizing that no matter how upset you were, it could never take away from how much you loved him. He was beautiful, his fiery red hair and the freckles splattered across his cheeks and nose creating a perfect picture. The softness of his complexion and the gentleness hidden deep in his expression assured you that whatever the two of you were doing was nothing more than an act. He knew you were his just as well as you did, but he knew the only way to settle the (admittedly, misguided) fear was to hear you say it aloud.
You helped him pull the fabric from your legs, wrapping your arms around his neck as you lifted your hips from the table. He discarded the clothing on the floor, paying no mind to it as he returned his hands to your bare legs. His eyes searched your face, carefully looking for any sign of discomfort. Instead, he was met with a pleading expression that only seemed to fuel his too large ego even further.
“No matter,” he disregarded his earlier rant, his eyes growing heavy as his hand fell between your legs. His fingertips grazed the thin fabric separating him from your core, a shiver running down his spine as he noticed the arousal that had soaked straight through. “I don’t mind having to show you. Least I’ll get to have my fun too, yeah?” He applied slight pressure to your aching clit, watching to see your reaction. Your eyebrows knitted together, your lips parting slightly as your hips moved forward into his hand, your body betraying your mind and begging him for something more.
At that, a grin encased his face, happy to see that he hadn’t lost his touch, even if your lives were vastly different and ever-changing by the day. He knew exactly how to make you feel good, and he took pride in it.
“See, Princess? She’ll always tell me the truth.” He taunted, his voice quiet as his eyes trailed down to his hand. You swallowed hard, knowing he had you in a stalemate. “Tell me again, who do you think knows how to make you feel good? Who does it best?” He was on a power trip, unwilling to slow down until he heard you admit it. Still, you stood your ground, pressing your lips tightly together so not a single sound could pass through. His grin faded, slowly sinking into a scowl as your disobedience remained clear.
He removed his finger from you, tracing the hem of your panties as he hooked his finger through the side of the fabric resting on your hip. He awaited an answer, giving you the opportunity to change your mind. When you kept your stoicism, he gave one, hard tug on the lacy fabric until it snapped in two. He used his other hand to do it to the opposite side, giving himself easy access to you without hearing a complaint on your end.
“So you don’t care who’s between your legs?” He continued, unrelenting as you stared him down. “Doesn’t matter who, as long as there’s a cock in you? As long as someone’s taking care of your pretty pussy?” Your cheeks flushed, your chest burning as the filthy words washed over you. “Doesn’t matter, sweetheart. When I’m done with you, I’ll be the only person you can think of. Surely then you won’t be able to forget who you belong to.”
His hand connected with your bare cunt, his fingers trailing through your arousal and settling over your clit as he began to trace slow circles into the sensitive area. Your legs trembled at the contact, finally feeling some relief from the nagging sensation that had been taking over.
“Fuck. Fred.” You whispered, giving yourself away immediately. He let out a low hum, pleased with the sound and knowing he was the reason for it. He had you where he wanted you, and now he just had to keep up the pace. You could feel his hardening length against your leg, distracting you completely from the pent up anger and frustration.
“That’s it.” He encouraged, his middle finger sinking inside of you as he let his thumb take over on your clit. “That’s my girl.” He made sure to accentuate the claim, never once letting you forget it. “All you needed was a little help remembering.” Slowly, he pumped his finger into you, keeping time with his thumb as he began to work you towards a climax. “You want to say it for me? Tell me what I already know?” Instead of responding, you let out a whine, your hips bucking forward into his hand. Although it wasn’t what he was looking for, it was just enough for him to keep going.
He curled his fingers as he pumped them into you, begging for a reaction as your hand wrapped around his bicep for support. You felt the tense of his muscles as he worked at you, only pushing you closer to insanity. You were his, undoubtedly and wholeheartedly, and you would be crazy to ever want anyone else.
“Stubborn little thing tonight.” He remarked, his eyes focused on the point in which his hand met with you, never breaking his stare as he watched his fingers disappear into you. “What’s gotten into you?”
“Need more, Freddie.” You replied, your eyes squeezed shut as you felt the pleasure pulsing under your skin. It had been a long time since you felt him this way, and your impatience was quite clear.
“My little whore needs more?” He teased, applying a little more pressure with his thumb. A gasp fell from your lips, sending your upper half leaning forward until your forehead rested against his. “Asking a lot from someone you aren’t being very good for.” He chastised you for your behavior despite being the one that caused the problem in the first place.
“M’sorry, my love. S-so sorry.” You rushed out, his fingers brushing against the sweet spot inside you only he knew how to find.
“That’s not what I want to hear sweetheart, and you know it.” His tone was firm, unrelenting as he continued his torment. You let out a groan of frustration, wishing he’d quicken the pace and give you what you wanted, even though you refused to give in to him.
He leaned forward, closing the gap between your mouths as he grew tired of waiting for the words he wanted to hear. He tasted like the whiskey that had been fuelling his poor mood, sweet and bitter all at once as his tongue grazed your bottom lip. You hated how easy it was for him to turn you into a mess, hated how easy it was for him to make you forget you were angry at all. You pulled him closer to you, holding his arm tightly so he would not pull away. You were stubborn, but despite that, you were showing him everything he wanted to see through your actions alone.
You broke from the kiss as a particularly intense wave of euphoria pulled your stomach. Your forehead continued to rest on his, holding you upright as he continued to give you just enough to keep you satisfied.
“Say it, princess.” His voice was low, raspy and laced with desire as he watched you turn into a mess below him. “Tell me you’re all mine. Tell me I’m the only one who can make you feel like this.” Instead, you connected your mouths again, letting a desperate moan out at the same time. He drank in the sound, his cock throbbing as his hips jutted forward into nothing. He was almost more desperate than you were, which only allowed for you to take him less seriously.
“G-gonna have to try harder than that.” You found a peculiar pleasure in leaving him on edge, giving him a taste of his own medicine as he continued to torture both of you at once. “Show me why I should say it, Freddie. Seems like you’re all t-talk.” You stuttered, tripping over your words as you tried to keep your composure.
He withdrew his hand from you, making you cry out in frustration from the loss of pleasure. Your eyes met his, desperation written all over your face as you protested his actions. Silently, he sunk to his knees between your legs, pulling you to the edge of the table by your hips. He didn’t spare a single glance at your face before his tongue connected with your core, the warm wetness of his tongue even more pleasurable than the rough pad of his thumb.
You laid back on the table, your hands sinking downwards and tangling in the soft locks of hair. Although you were denying him of the statement he wanted to hear, you could not deny that your last argument was wholly untrue. Fred was determined to prove a point, and he was doing it well.
You weren’t far off from an orgasm, his tongue making quick work at pushing you to the edge. The sounds falling from your lips were telling of your current state, and as delirium began to set in, your defenses began to break down.
He suctioned his lips around your clit, adding his fingers to the mix and returning to his earlier pace to torture you further. Every nerve in your body was ablaze with desire, need seeping from every pore as you realized just how badly you needed the release. Sick of the game, you finally broke in fear he would leave you hanging yet again.
“Oh, god.” You gasped, your legs resting over his shoulders in attempt to stop the constant trembling of the lips. “I’m yours, Fred, fuck!” You exclaimed, a sheen layer of sweat forming over your forehead as the knot in your belly began to tighten. “Only you can make me feel this good. Nobody else.” You whined, your fingers tightening on the locks of hair as you began to tug at the strands. You could feel him smiling against you, happy to finally hear you admit the truth.
Pleased with your confessions, he curled his fingers against your g-spot one last time, generously giving you the very thing you’d been pleading for. In a mess, your entire body tensed as the pleasure took hold. The orgasm washed over you, leaving your heart racing against your chest and your head swirling with filthy thoughts for the boy between your legs. A hum of approval let you know he was more than happy with your performance, and he kept his pace until he felt you relax against the table below you.
Once he knew he’d gotten the most out of you, he rose to his feet, towering over you as you laid below him. In the dim moonlight, you could see your orgasm glistening on his chin, only furthering his cockiness as he ran his tongue over his bottom lip so he did not waste a drop of it.
“Always taste so sweet, princess.” He whispered, using one hand to free himself from his pants and his boxers. “And it’s all for me.” He continued, slipping his shirt from his head. He used it to wipe his face clean before tossing it on the floor to join the growing pile of clothes. With shaky hands, you lifted your upper half from the table and pulled your own jumper over your head. “Isn’t that right?” He stepped toward, settling between your legs as his hands ghosted over your bare thighs.
You let out a whimper, his grip landing on your already sore hips as his eyes raked over your entire frame. Your gaze flickered to his cock, hard and aching for relief as he continued to tease you. His fingers tickled your stomach as he trailed his touch upwards, his palm landing flat against your breast as he gave it a gentle squeeze. He let the pad of his thumb brush over your hardened nipple, sending another wave of pleasure through you.
“Answer me, sweetheart.” He wasn’t playing anymore; he wanted to hear the words, and he was done with your obstinacy. He pinched your nipple between his thumb and forefinger,
“Yes,” you huffed, already forgetting the pleasure from your first climax as a whole new wave of need began to take over. “I’m yours, Fred. All yours.” You reiterated your earlier statement, now willing to do whatever he wanted of you to prove the point.
“Tell me how bad you want it.” He shot you a twisted little smile, almost as if he was getting off just from the thought of you begging for him.
“I need it, baby. Need to feel you, please.” You whined, reaching for his arms and pulling him closer. “Want you so bad, Fred. Been waiting all night for it.” You felt the tip of his cock connect with your cunt, his expression faltering as soon as he felt the wetness.
“God, you make it so hard to be upset with you.” He hissed the words through his teeth, using his hand to guide himself through your folds as he sucked in a sharp breath. He settled himself just over your already sensitive clit, pushing his hips forward ever so slightly to apply pressure to the spot. “Sound so pretty when you’re begging to be fucked.”
Slowly, he let his tip run back through your arousal, settling the head just at your entrance. He pushed himself forward, but just barely. You whimpered as you braced yourself for the feeling, only to be let down when he stopped himself from going any further.
“Fred,” you warned, catching his eye so he could see your desperate face. You hoped that if he did, he would stop being such a tease. “Please fuck me.”
“What was that?” He smirked, turning his head slightly so his ear was closer to you. “Didn’t quite catch it.”
“Fred, stop—“ you cut yourself off, letting out a huff of annoyance. You knew chastising him for his actions would only make him less likely to give in, even if it was incredibly hard to hold it back. “I need you to fuck me.” You repeated, clearer and louder in hopes of swaying his decision. “Can’t wait any longer, baby. Please.”
At that, he pushed forward the rest of the way, sending your entire body raising with goosebumps. The stretch as he filled you was exactly what you craved, and as he reached the hilt, his tip brushed against your g-spot so delicately that it almost made you come undone right then and there. Your eyelids grew heavy with satisfaction, focusing on how full you felt with him inside of you, knowing that he for certain would always be the one for you.
“That good enough for you, Princess? This is what you wanted?” He asked, letting himself rest inside you for a moment. He felt your walls flutter around him, pulling him even further and making it harder for him to resist you.
“Mhm,” you hummed, giving him a tired nod of agreement. You could feel him throbbing inside of, desperate for a release just like you had been moments before, but he was still trying to prove his point.
“Nobody else gets to have you like this, sweetheart. You’re mine.” He whispered, now sober from the alcohol but intoxicated by an even stronger, deadlier force; you. “He couldn’t fuck you like this, and you know it.” As he spoke, he withdrew his hips and slammed them forward into you again. The action stole the breath from your lungs, twisting your stomach with pleasure as your nails scratched over his skin.
He began at a pace, slower than normal but the force behind his movements making your head spin. You moaned quietly, lost within the feeling of being so close to him. He never failed to take your breath away, never failed to amaze you with his every move. You were so in love with him it sometimes felt like there was no room within your heart for anyone or anything else.
“Tell me, Y/N.” He ordered, his stare never wavering as he fucked into you. As much as he wanted to succumb to the sensation of you wrapped around him, he found it hard to push the thoughts of your earlier arguments out of his head. “You think he’d fuck you like this? You think he could make you feel this good?”
“No, Freddie.” You gasped, feeling the strength of his thrusts increase, sending the legs of the table wobbling. His fingers tightened on your hips, likely leaving behind angry red marks that would fade into reminders of him for days to come.
“That’s it, Princess.” He panted, his chest heaving as he tried to resist the pull of pleasure. “Don’t you think, not even for a second, that anyone can give you half of what I can.” You both knew this to be fact; nobody in the entire world could ever compare to him. “And why do you think that is?”
“‘C-cause I’m yours,” you managed to stutter out the response, watching him as the statement washed over. He brought his hand to your thigh, your legs wrapped tightly around you as he pulled you back on him with every thrust. His head fell back on his shoulders, the dim light of the room casting a beautiful hue over his already breathtaking features.
“That’s right,” he grunted, slamming his hips forward again. There was a thin layer of sweat sheen on his chest, the toned muscles of his abdomen flexing every time he moved. The exposed columns of his neck made your mouth water, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed back his own groans of pleasure. “Was that why you were mouthing off? You just needed someone to take care of you? Just needed me to fuck you?”
“God, yes.” You moaned, feeling the pressure in your belly begin to reach a peak.
“You gonna cum for me, sweetheart? All over my cock?” He smiled, looking down at you so he could appreciate the view. “Come on now, making a fucking mess of it.”
“Fuck,” you whimpered, his words hitting you hard and causing the tightening knot in your belly to tense even further.
“That’s my pretty girl. Just like that.” He continued to encourage you, studying your expression as pleasure began to twist it.
It didn’t take much more for you to descend into another orgasm, your entire body quivering as you cried out for him, singing his name like a hymn and he was the god in which you prayed to. Your throat was raw, raspy from the constant string of moans passing your lips. You were tired, almost too fucked out to continue on, but he was having none of it. He didn’t slow his pace as you came down from the high, instead speeding up and ensuring that he pulled your entire body down on him as he fucked into you.
“Freddie, please.” You breathed, feeling the threat of overstimulation begin to creep in. He would have had sympathy had he known you couldn’t take it, but he was confident in your ability to keep up with him.
“What’s wrong, Princess? Wanted it so bad and now you can’t handle it?” He asked, his eyes glazed over with lust as he felt himself approaching his own orgasm. You frowned at his words, now on a quest to prove your own point as you tried to ignore the stinging beginning to set in.
“I can t-take it.” You huffed, a shiver running down your spine as he reached upwards and palmed your breast. He gave the supple flesh a gentle squeeze, his eyes closing in bliss as he let himself slip out of the persona he had created.
“Being so good for me—just a bit longer now.” He whispered, his voice far away as his eyes settled over your face once more. “Bloody hell, Y/N.” he groaned, his forehead creasing as his eyebrows furrowed together. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
He slipped his hand between your legs, his thumb landing atop your clit. He traced slow circles, knowing you were a bit further behind him and unwilling to climax without giving you at least one more. He could see how tired you were, but it did not deter him from his commitment to pleasing you.
“I love you, Fred.” You whispered, softened entirely by the sweet look in his eyes. All of his previous anger fled, leaving him just as the boy you’d fallen so hopelessly for.
“I love you, sweetheart.” He hummed, his hips stuttering and his stature faltering. “Give me one more, yeah? I know you can do it.” And he was right, your entire body was ablaze with another orgasm much more powerful than the last two.
“Together?” You gasped, reaching up and settling your palm on his cheek.
“Yeah? You want to cum with me?” He encouraged your train of thought. “Want me to fill that pretty cunt? Really show you who you belong to?”
“Fuck yes, please.” You cried, your fingertips tangling in the locks of hair hanging over his ears. Your walls clenched around him, drawing him in and effortlessly finishing what you had started.
You felt his hips stall, a low growl leaving his lips as he pulled you down on him one last time. He managed to whisper your name as he spilled his release into you, the feeling of him filling you completely sending you spiraling on your own accord. You let out a defeated sigh, the tail end of it turning into a whine as your body went rigid. Your nails scratched at the skin of his arm, your hand on him the only thing keeping you tied to earth instead of floating up and through the clouds.
The both of you rode the high together, euphoria infiltrating every nerve in both of your bodies as he leaned down towards you. Ever so gently, he laid his head on your chest, which was still heaving as you tried to catch up from the lack of oxygen. He placed a plethora of small kisses against the warm skin, his eyes fluttering closed as he appreciated the comfort that came with your company.
Silence hung heavy between you for a few moments, neither of you sure where to go from there. You were still strung out on bliss, barely remembering what got the two of you in the position until he spoke again.
“M’sorry, sweetheart.” His voice barely broke through the room, so timid and shy that you almost missed it completely. “I know you’d never do that. Just got in my head, I s’pose.”
“I… I get it.” You sighed, twisting a lock of his hair. “If I walked in on that, after us being so.. you know. I’d likely feel it too.” You confessed. “I was upset that we had to cancel dinner. I am upset, but not at you.” You tried your best to explain yourself despite exhaustion eating away at your mind. “I’m just upset because I miss you. You’re so busy now, and I’m happy for you, really, but I miss you too.”
“You think I was bloody happy about it?” Fred chuckled, the tip of his fingers tracing shapes into your skin. “I’d much rather be here, with you.” At that, you relaxed completely, understanding that you had gotten too far into your own head. “It’s my favorite place to be. Always has been.”
“Mine too, Fred.” You hummed, smiling softly at the thought.
“I reckon I was a bit jealous, ‘specially at the thought of you and George spending so much time with each other. Would rather it be me, you know, sitting at the shop and laughing with you all night… taking you out for dinner… loving you.” Another gentle kiss was placed to your chest, just before he looked up to meet your eyes. The soft, warm, familiar sight made you feel at ease. He was back to being your Fred, the one you missed all along.
“Darling, you have nothing to be jealous about.” You promised, smiling as he placed a quick peck on your lips. “Though, if it means we get to have brilliant sex like that, by all means do what you have to do.” You explained. “Bloody brilliant, at that.” Without any further words, the two of you descended into a fit of laughter and the clouds that previously hung above your head seemingly cleared in an instant, easily proving to him there was really never a need to worry at all.
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hpseeker99 · 6 months ago
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Neville: Which one of you was going to tell me that tea tastes different if you put it in hot water? Ron: Y-You were putting it in cold water? Ginny: Neville. Answer the question Neville. Neville: Yeah? I thought for like 5 years that people just put it in hot water to speed up the tea-ification process, didn’t realize there was an actual reason. You think I have the patience to boil water? Ginny: You don't have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes? Ron: Why are you, putting it in the microwave to boil it?! Ginny: Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove? Ron: It 👏🏻 TAKES👏🏻 LESS THAN A 👏🏻 MINUTE Ginny: Bestie is your stovetop powered by the fucking sun?? Ron: How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove? Ginny: Like seven minutes Ron: Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat and it boils in like two minutes… less than that is you use a saucepan… Ginny: [crying] You’re putting the whole mug on the stove?? On medium heat?? Your stove is enchanted Hermione: Every single person here is a fucking lunatic. Harry: Do none of you own a fucking kettle?
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maki-nsi · 10 days ago
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Rumors 'round Hogwarts obviously based on Norman Rockwell's "Chain of Gossip", for those not caught up, basically, Harry told Hermione who told Ron who told Dean who told Lavender who told Parvati who told Padma who told Cho who told Luna who told Ginny who told Neville who told Daphne who told Blaise who told Pansy who told Draco who told Harry
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maybebitterxox · 9 months ago
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Harry Potter ships/duos (both romantic & platonic) as textposts + one golden trio
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crackishincorrecthp · 1 month ago
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Hermione: What did you get Harry for his birthday? Luna: I got him a kitten, he's so sad since Hedwig was killed...I thought he could use some new animal company Ginny: Really? Me too! Like, I didn't want to risk an owl, so kitten it was! Neville: I also got him a cat... George: Looks like we had the same idea... Hermione: Ron, please tell me you didn't get Harry a cat as well! Ron: ...I got him a kitten Hermione: Merlin! What is Harry going to do with 6 cats?! Ron: You got him a cat too? Hermione: Yeah, I thought the same as Luna and Ginny, that Harry could use some animal company again but I didn't want to risk an owl...
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pottersource · 8 months ago
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Harry Potter, the boy who lived... come to die.
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blackbirdi · 9 months ago
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Harry Potter Incorrect Quotes #2
~~~~~~~~~~
Harry: So how’d you guys manage to crash the car last night?
Hermione: Ron wasn’t paying attention to the road, and there was a deer. So I shouted, “RON, DEER!”
Ron:
Hermione: Go on. Tell him what you said.
Ron: … “Yes, honey?”
*Cue Harry dying*
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George: *Whispering so they don’t get caught out of bed by Filch* What time is it?
Fred: *Screams loudly*
Snape: WHO THE FUCK IS SCREAMING AT TWO IN THE MORNING!?
Fred: There you go.
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Hermione: *Showing Mr. Weasley how to use muggle technology* There you go. Your laptop is all set up.
Mr. Weasley: Will it get heavier if I put more files in it?
Hermione: What?
Mr. Weasley: Like, if I download files will it weigh more?
Hermione:
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*The girls decorating the Christmas tree*
Hermione: Does anyone know where the angel is?
Ginny: *Pointing at Luna* Found it!
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Mrs. Weasley: When I said bring me something back from Hogwarts I meant something you bought at Hogsmeade.
The Twins: *Struggling to contain a Bludger* Well you didn’t specify that!
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Neville Longbottom: So how’d you know Harry was the one?
Ginny: *Dreamily* He looked at me the way every woman wants to be looked at…
Neville: Awww.
Ginny: With fear in his eyes.
Neville:
Hermione: Awwwww.
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Ron: Did it hurt when you fell from the vending machine? Cause you’re a whole snack.
Hermione: Are you silence? Because you make me speechless.
Ginny: Who do you think is going to make this dirty first?
Harry: Turn this dirty? Neither of them, Gin, they’re too cute for one another.
Ron: Are you my pinky toe? Cause I’m gonna bang you against every piece of furniture I own.
Hermione:
Harry:
Ginny:
Harry: I take back my previous statement.
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*After watching Frosty the Snowman*
Ron: What did Frosty the Snowman do other than come to life, do a little dance, and die?
Harry: Isn’t that what we all do, really?
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Ron: You played me like a fiddle!
Fred: Oh no, Ronniekins. Fiddles are actually very difficult to play.
George: We played you like the cheap kazoo you are.
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Ron: *Walking into the living room to complain* Mum! There’s no more snacks in the kitchen!
Ginny: *From the kitchen* But I’m literally right here!
Ron: *Frustrated groan*
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The Twins: We can assure you, our place of business is extremely safe.
Ron: *Looking up at the ceiling* The smoke detector is a white bowl with a red M&M taped to it…
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laughhardrunfastbekindsblog · 2 months ago
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Okay, in the past few years with different Bad Batch discussions on various social media platforms, I've come across a few too many comments questioning Wrecker's intelligence, saying that Wrecker "isn't smart," he's only "emotionally intelligent," and even (rarely, but it's happened) straight up "he's stupid."
Of course, there are different levels/types of intelligence; my point is that these comments about Wrecker are completely unfounded.
I may make a longer post about this later, but in the meantime allow me to summarize:
(Okay yeah I'm starting with what's probably a headcanon here but I think there's enough unstated evidence in the shows to back me up) Wrecker being a fully commissioned soldier means he is at least as "smart" on average as any of the other clones
His applicable understanding of physics and engineering is such that he is the squad's explosives/demolitions expert, including constructing a weapon on the fly in the middle of a battle
He may not know hand signals or immediately recognize plan numbers, but he DOES know the plans themselves
Relating to the above, Tech describes a plan as "what we did on Felucia" and Wrecker instantly remembers and recognizes it, which to me indicates his memory is outstanding
A few other points:
Being "kid-friendly" does not mean Wrecker is less intelligent overall than his peers
Behaving "childishly" sometimes does not mean Wrecker is less intelligent
Being loud does not mean Wrecker is less intelligent
Being impulsive does not mean Wrecker is less intelligent (spending less time thinking over how to tackle a problem does not mean he's less capable of thinking)
These traits and intelligence are not mutually exclusive
Intelligence does not and should not involve fitting into one "box" or definition
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yovrnewromantic · 3 months ago
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THE MEANEST GIRL IN HUFFLEPUFF
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a small series inspired by my harry potter oc! and her interactions with her peers! enjoy :) please lmk if you have any requests!!
the masterlist! (written by a hufflepuff in denial so yk its accurate)
Harry Potter... Coming soon...
Draco Malfoy
Cedric Diggory
Hermione Granger
Theodore Nott
Ron Weasley
Mattheo Riddle
Lorenzo Berkshire
Fred Weasley
Blaise Zabini
Pansy Parkinson
Ginny Weasley
George Weasley
Luna Lovegood
Neville Longbottom
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beerose12 · 9 months ago
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harry potter as memes part 1 feat.
1. ron having the emotional range of a teaspoon
2. neville being accident prone
3. hermione being done with all this fucking bullshit
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lunarlivs · 4 months ago
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harry and friends ◡̈
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sofmaart · 6 months ago
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This is my first time ever posting fanart, so I hope it goes well🦡
Anyway f*ck TERFs💗
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hpseeker99 · 5 months ago
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Hermione: And that's the plan! Hermione: Now let's see who was paying attention. *Kahoot music starts*
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sunfl0w3rmel0n · 7 months ago
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Harry’s voicemail would sound like:
“Hi, you’ve reached Harry Potter. Sorry I couldn’t pick up your call.
If you’re Hermione, please limit your message to no more than 4 minutes. I’m a busy man, ‘mione, really.
If you’re Ron, yeah hi to you too. I’ll be at yours on Tuesday night for drinks. Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten.
If you’re Neville, er- congrats on whatever new plant you just got.
If you’re Luna, yes I’ve renewed my Quibbler subscription. Tell your dad I said hello.
If you’re Ginny, congrats on winning your match and decided to call to scream at me about. If you lost… I’ll call you back soon.
If you’re Draco, I’ll be home soon. Don’t leave the stove on. Finish the laundry if you haven’t already. Yes I’m okay. Yes I miss you too. Yes I know you want my ‘bloody arse’ home. I love you too.
And if you’re anybody else, I’ll get back to you as soon as possible!”
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maybebitterxox · 8 months ago
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Harry Potter Characters As Texposts Part 2
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