#harry and poppy

[freedomfireflies]

Pillow Talk*

Summary: The one where you and Harry both have insomnia, and decide to spend one very strange night together.

Word Count: 7.2k

Content Warning: 18+, smut, daddy kink, mentions of drugs, angst (w/ happy ending!), not suitable for Ramadan!

“Oh, absolutely not.”

“Come on. Just one time.”

“No. Are you out of your fucking mind?”

“Probably. I haven’t slept in 32 hours.”

You huff as you hide yourself behind your door. You don’t even want to see him. Because you don’t want to have this conversation or entertain this idiotic idea. This is what Harry does. He plays games. He tricks and he ruins and if you open this door, you know you’ll regret it. 

“Poppy, please,” he calls, and you hear his forehead land on the wood as though to brace himself. “I’ve tried everything else, okay? It always works with you. I just…I wanted to try. See if it still does.”

You frown. “You realize how wildly inappropriate this is, right? Asking if you can come in just so we can sleep together?”

“Yeah, but that’s all I want to do. Sleep,” he insists again. “Really. I’ll keep my hands to myself and I won’t even talk to you.”

You consider this. Truthfully, you haven’t slept all that well since the breakup, either. And sure, you’ve longed for the nights when the two of you would fall into such an easy, simple, and incredibly effective routine. 

But he broke your heart. And now you’re both paying the price.

“Just one night,” he pleads again. “And if it doesn’t work, I swear I won’t bother you ever again.”

There’s a subtle ache in your chest. Just hearing his voice reminds you of the pain. Of the joy. Of every good moment and every bad one, all wrapped up in the same silky cadence.

You take a deep breath. Perhaps you’re curious, too. Even if you don’t want to be. Because maybe this will work. Maybe you’ll finally be able to rest and get on with your life.

Or maybe it won’t.

But at least if it doesn’t, maybe you can find some closure.

So, with that thought…you open the door. 

He looks worse than you’ve ever seen him. Which makes you just a touch happy if you’re being honest with yourself. His usual curls are askew and unkept. The bags under his eyes are dark and his clothes are wildly wrinkled.

And you’re surprised. He’s been up for longer than 32 hours before and handled it much better. You wonder if his age is catching up with him or if there’s something else keeping him awake.

It wouldn’t be the first time.

But you don’t fight with him. He’s not here to fight and you accept his terms as you widen the door and allow him to step inside.

He nods gratefully as he slips into your living room, but his eyes linger on your face. Almost like he doesn’t recognize you, and it makes your insides turn as you shut the door and put a few feet between you.

“What?” you huff.

He shakes his head. “I don’t know, you look…different.”

“Okay…?”

“You changed your hair.”

“Yeah.”

“Hm. It’s nice.”

You cross your arms. “Thanks.”

“Sure.”

Another pause, and the silence feels heavy.

“Well…do you wanna…?” you eventually say, and he nods.

“Right, yeah.”

“Okay.”

You turn to lead him to your room and it’s…unsettling how normal it feels. Like an old habit rearing its ugly head once again.

When you get there, his surprise returns. “You changed your room, too.”

“Yeah.”

“Oh. Why?”

Your eyes roll as you angrily toss your blankets back. “This is the one room I associated with you the most. And short of moving, I needed something you hadn’t touched or tainted. So I made the room mine again.”

He thinks about this, attention lingering on the new paint on the walls and the new furniture in each corner. “I like it.”

“I don’t care.”

He smiles. “I know.”

“Great. Can you get in the bed please so we can get this over with?”

Obliging, he slips off his shoes and joins you under the duvet. “Never thought I’d hear you say that again.”

“Never thought I’d have to say it.”

“Mm. You changed your mattress.”

“Obviously.”

“And the sheets and blankets, too.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Is there anything in here you didn’t change?”

“The carpet. But only because my landlord said I couldn’t.”

“Right.” He’s smiling again. “But you did get a rug.”

“Yeah.”

“It’s nice.”

“Bite me.”

He laughs now and you want to smack him. “I see you still get grumpy when you’re tired.”

“No, I get grumpy when my asshole of an ex shows up to my apartment at 3 in the morning demanding to be let in so he can sleep in my bed with me like a fucking child,” you argue. And you know you’re being snippy and maybe even rude, but he deserves it. After everything he’s put you through, you deserve to be in charge of your own emotions. 

You turn the lamp off and the dark room grows incredibly quiet. You’re both stiff, unable to relax when you’re this close. You don’t want to touch—not the way you used to. And you don’t want to be close or let your guard down, although you suppose you’ll have to in order to sleep.

And then he says, “I really did try, you know. To find another way to sleep.”

You look up at the ceiling and release a soft exhale. “Okay.”

“Melatonin, light therapy, cut out coffee. Even drank those…sleep mocktail things everyone talks about.” He shifts. “I don’t know, I guess my brain just wouldn’t turn off.”

“Yeah. I know.”

More quiet.

“I haven’t done any since we broke up,” he finally says. Gentle, like he’s afraid to break the silence. 

Your lashes flutter. He doesn’t have to say it for you to know what he means. “Great.”

“Yeah.” Another beat. “I thought it was work, I guess. Maybe the stress or something. I’ve been sleeping fine, but these past couple weeks…”

“Right.”

“And I just figured��”

“No, I got it. It’s fine, let’s just…let’s just try to sleep,” you say and he nods.

The bedroom settles and you try, you really do. But you can’t when he’s breathing so goddamn loud and shifting every two seconds and sighing like he’s in pain.

“What?” you eventually hiss.

“Are you dating someone?” he asks.

“What?”

“Are you dating someone?” he repeats. “Josie said you were.”

You hesitate. “I don’t know. Kind of. I guess.”

“You guess?”

“We’re…we’ve been on a few dates. It’s not official.”

“He hasn’t asked you to be his girlfriend?”

“Why does it matter?”

“I don’t know. It doesn’t. I just figure you deserve someone that actually wants to date you.”

“Oh, do I?” You roll your head to look at him. “Funny, you didn’t seem to think so when you were dating me.”

“All right, touché,” he mumbles. “I could have been better, I know that. And I know I took advantage. You did a lot for me and I didn’t…I didn’t care.”

Surprised, you twist your fingers together. “Uh…yeah. Right. Thank you.”

His head rolls, too. And even with the dim-light, his eyes find yours. “I’m sorry, Poppy. You really did deserve better than me. And if you found it with this guy…I’ll be happy for you.”

You swallow before sighing to yourself. “I mean, I don’t know if I did. He’s…he’s really nice. But he’s so…he’s just…”

“Vanilla?”

Your eyes widen. “Yeah. How did you—”

“He was wearing Crocs with tube socks.”

You laugh—loud. “Oh my god, how did you know?”

“I might have looked him up,” he admits through a grin. “Wanted to make sure he was worth your time.”

“Yeah? And?”

“And he wears Crocs with tube socks. He can’t make you cum.”

Your features scrunch together as you gasp and look away. “Ew, Harry. It’s not about that—”

“It’s always about that. Come on, am I wrong?”

“You—yes. What he wears has nothing to do with what he’s like in bed—”

“So he’s not vanilla?”

“He’s…” You pause. “He…look, he really tries—”

“So, he is,” Harry finishes for you. “Well, at least you got some.”

“I…yeah. Uh-huh.”

Instantly, he turns onto his side, head resting in the palm of his hand as he studies you. “He couldn’t get it up, could he?”

“Harry,” you groan, and reach out to swat him. “Stop, it wasn’t that. We just…we were taking things slow. We did some stuff. Just not…all of it.”

“So what he’d do?”

“Harry—”

“Come on, we’re adults, just tell me.”

“Ew, no—”

“Listen, you used to get fucked good. I’m just trying to help you get back to that.”

You frown but do oblige. “I don’t know. He ate me out and I blew him. That’s it.”

“And…?”

“And…I don’t know. He was fine. He was good.”

“Sure.”

Your eyes roll. “Okay, he…he wasn’t really all that into it. He stopped after a few seconds and asked if I came. Then he said his jaw was tired and that maybe we should just switch.”

Now, Harry’s features scrunch, too. “Shit. What a fucking pussy. Ironically.”

“I guess. It could have been worse.”

“Really? Eating you out was always my favorite. What kind of asshole just stops if he doesn’t have to?”

You feel a rush of heat through your body as you look away. “I guess they can’t all be you.”

“Damn fucking right,” he scoffs. “Seriously, you still wanted to see him after that?”

“He’s cute,” you argue. “And nice. And yeah, maybe he’s not that adventurous but that’s okay. I don’t need wild sex all the time.”

He’s quiet. “How about just one time?”

You turn back. “What?”

“I—okay, I was just thinking…you know, one of the things we would do when we couldn’t sleep was…fuck, so—”

“Oh, absolutely not.” You sit up, as though to put some distance between you. “No. Forget it—”

“Poppy—”

“Don’t call me that,” you huff. “You don’t get to call me that ever again. Okay, I’m not gonna fuck you just so we can sleep—”

“It wouldn’t be just for that,” he argues, sitting up as well. “It would also help your mood, too—”

“Oh, my mood?” You glare at him. “My mood is just fine, actually. In fact, I’d say it’s pretty good if I agreed to let you in my apartment in the first place—”

“You didn’t have to. I’m just saying, if sex with him is gonna be bland, might as well get in one last good fuck before you commit to a lifetime of boring—”

“Oh, my god. It’s not a lifetime and you’re a fucking asshole—”

“Yeah. We’ve established that. Doesn’t change the fact that you need it.”

You stare at him. “Is that why you’re really here? To trick me into sleeping with you?”

He leans back. “What? No. I don’t trick people into having sex, it was just a suggestion—”

“Yeah, a pretty dumb one. Did you honestly think I’d say yes?”

“Yeah,” he admits haughtily. “Yeah, because we didn’t break up over the sex. We broke up because you’re an uptight—”

“What? Say it,” you sneer. “Say it. I’m an uptight bitch because I wouldn’t let you do cocaine.”

He scoffs again and looks off into the dark of your room. The argument lulls. “I could never do anything right.”

“That wasn’t the problem and you know it.” You pull your legs to your chest. “I wanted to move forward and you kept going back. You’re almost 30 and you still act like you’re 19.”

“Maybe I didn’t want to get married and do the whole white picket fence life,” he says. “Maybe I liked things the way they were—”

“No. No, you liked parties with your friends and doing drugs that kept you up for hours  and getting fired and leaving me to pay all the bills—”

“You didn’t pay all the bills and I told you I would do what I could to help—”

“Yeah. But apparently that included getting fucked up and staying out all night just to crash the next day.” You study him closely. “You were never around anymore. I never saw you. We were on two different paths and the only time we ever talked was when you asked if I wanted to fuck.”

“So, that’s it, huh? I’m just a villain in your story. You were this perfect fucking princess, and I was a monster that ruined your life?”

“No, obviously not. I wasn’t perfect. I know that.”

“Do you?” His eyes flick between yours. “You didn’t want me to move forward with you. You liked your new job and your new friends because they didn’t remind you of me. Of who we both used to be.”

“So? I’m not proud of what I used to do. And sure, maybe I wanted to make a better impression on the people paying my salary and keeping me employed. Is that such a fucking crime?”

“No. But you didn’t want me to be a part of that impression and you know it.”

“Right. Because you were shit-faced all the time.”

He opens his mouth, ready to retort. But then he closes it. He closes it and he stares at you and then…he surges forward.

Even if you were given at least two seconds to prepare, you’re not prepared for the way his hands feel on your cheeks as he kisses you. As he presses his lips to yours and steals the labored breaths in your lungs.

But you don’t fight him. You know you should. Know you should push him off and berate him. Yet you let him kiss you. And you kiss him back. And it’s far too easy to slip back into this routine as his tongue slides against yours in such a teasing way.

Your stomach flips while your hands land on his lap. You’re desperate to be closer, to feel his body against yours. His skin, and the way it melts beneath your palms like butter. You dance this devious dance and before you know it, you’re stripping each other of the few clothes you have.

He starts with your shirt. Ripping it over your head before his mouth lands on your chest. Bare and beautiful to him. His kisses are wet and sloppy and you arch yourself closer as you drag your fingers down his scalp.

The only reason he stops is to let you peel his t-shirt off, too. And then his jeans and socks. And you move so fluidly, you’re nearly naked in under a minute. The only thing left between you now his underwear and yours.

He lays you down, gentle. Surprisingly gentle, given the anger that brought you here. And he gazes at you in a soft, unspoken way that says everything you don’t exactly know how to say. 

His fingers brush down your cheek as his body settles atop yours. He still fits between your legs like he was always meant to and the weight of him almost feels good.

“Are you all right?” he finally whispers, and he doesn’t sound like the same man from before. He sounds like the man you fell in love with. “Is this okay?”

You nod quickly, scared that if you think about it, you’ll ruin it. “Yeah. Go.”

He doesn’t. “We don’t have to,” he says. “You were right, it’s probably a dumb idea—”

“Yeah, but…it always works.” You shift beneath him and reach for his briefs, rolling them down his hips. “And I’m tired. Tired of fighting with you, tired of not getting any sleep…tired of pretending I hate you. You were right, our sex is good. So let’s do it. And then we can sleep. And we can finally move on.”

Not the most romantic of speeches, but it works. At least right now. He kisses you again and drags your underwear aside in order to tease you with the tip of his cock.

He feels like you remember. And maybe you find just a touch of comfort in that. There are no awkward pauses or confusion about what to do next. You don’t have to find your rhythm or anticipate the next step. You know him. And he knows you.

Your rub your clit in order to stimulate yourself. You aren’t exactly wet enough for this to be enjoyable, but you don’t expect him to do what he did before. The foreplay is up to you now and you’re more than all right with that.

However, he’s not. And he instantly swats your hand away in order to do it himself. Allowing his fingers to drag up and down your pussy until you shiver before he slips the tip of his middle finger inside.

“Shit,” he whispers. His forehead drops to yours. “Fucking missed this.”

You bite the inside of your lip to keep from grinning. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” He starts to pump, bending your body to his salacious intentions until the unmistakable sound of wetness echoes throughout the room. “I know you missed it, too.”

“Hm. Don’t push it.”

“Why not?” He presses a kiss to your cheek. Then to your jaw. Your lips. Your nose. Your neck. Everywhere you used to love. “Are you really gonna tell me you didn’t?” 

“Maybe.”

“So Crocs with Tube Socks is better, huh?”

“…not exactly.”

“Right.” He adds a second finger and your eyes roll back. “Don’t worry, Poppy, I’ll fix it.”

“Don’t…call me that,” you pant again, and he chuckles.

“Don’t know what else to call you. You were always my pretty Poppy.”

“But now I’m not,” you say. “Now you call me nothing. Because I’m not yours to call.”

He sighs but does seem to obey, at least for now. And the faster he thrusts his hand, the needier this growing feeling becomes. Stronger and louder until you finally grab onto his shoulders and say, “Just put it in already.”

He smirks. “How romantic.”

“It’s not supposed to be. Just come on.”

So, he does. He takes hold of his cock and he slips it through the gathering arousal until he can push in. And you both reel.

Truthfully, you’ve missed the sounds he makes when he’s turned on. The way he groans and grits his teeth together. The way the muscles in his arms strain until you can see those beautiful veins you used to love to run your tongue over. 

He’s stunning. Even now, in the soft light of the moon through your curtains. His silhouette is unholy as it hovers above you. Strong hips beginning to thrust as you both work in tandem to find release.

And it’s closer than you expected. There’s something about him that can get you there even without much effort. Something Crocs with Tube Socks could never seem to figure out. 

Because he’s not Harry. And only Harry can play you like an instrument and make such symphonic music all with the flick of his finger and a thrust of his cock.

He kisses you again and you both feel anxious. Soft murmurings of praise and, “Keep going,” that have you arching from the bed and moaning into his mouth.

You’re sweating and gasping for air and clutching onto his back as you attempt to meet his rhythm with rolls of your own. You need this. You need to cum so you can find release and you need to cum so you can finally sleep and you need to cum because then you’ll finally be able to let him go. To close the door on the chapter of you and Harry and move the fuck on.

But how can you move on when you’re still under him? How can you insist that you’re fine and doing great if you’re so easily convinced to fuck him just so you can both get some sleep?

There are other remedies to insomnia that don’t involve his cock and maybe you should have tried that before you let him into your apartment. 

Either way, you’re coming before you can think twice about it. Raking your nails down his back and whimpering his name as he pulls out and finishes on your thigh. 

And just like that…

It’s over.

You find him in the kitchen about an hour later. You managed to sleep at least a few minutes before you felt the sadistic hand of insomnia pull you back out. But when you woke, Harry was gone. His clothes were still on the floor, so you knew he hadn’t left. But he wasn’t with you.

He’s staring out your kitchen window when you slip into the living room. You’re not sure if he hears you or not but if he does, he doesn’t acknowledge it. Instead, he keeps himself braced against the sink, clad in nothing more than his briefs.

Curious, you call, “What’s wrong?”

He shakes his head. Silent. Contemplative. “I used to love this window,” he eventually says. Soft, like he’s reminiscing. “The way the light looked in the morning. The way your little crystals would put rainbows on the wall and you’d get so excited. How you’d make me dance with you to some Elton John song while we were literally in the middle of cooking.”

You blink. “Um…okay.”

He turns and his eyes find yours. “I fucking loved this apartment. And this kitchen. And that couch. And your room. And even the hallway. I loved being here, all the time. I hated going back to my place because it never felt the same.”

The silence grows louder now as you look down at your feet and pull your robe just a bit tighter. “I know,” you finally whisper. “That’s why I changed it.”

“I know,” he whispers back. His expression falls. “You changed everything. This apartment, your life…us.”

“Because I had to,” you argue, glancing back up. “I had to, Harry. I couldn’t keep going in circles. I couldn’t drag you along behind me into the future when you clearly wanted to be anywhere else.” 

“Because the future you always painted didn’t seem to have room for me,” he huffs. “Okay, with all these dinner parties and fancy houses and good school districts. You’d planned out the next 30 years and I didn’t see myself anywhere in your picture.”

“I didn’t fucking care about the parties or the school districts,” you nearly yell. “God, I—I didn’t want the white picket fence life. I didn’t want the 1950’s American Dream shit you keep thinking I did. I just wanted you. Yes, I wanted a good job with insurance and stability. But I wasn’t gonna trade what we had just for that—”

“But you did. You didn’t tell your parents we’d moved in together. You didn’t even tell half of our friends. You went on trips without me and you stopped telling me about your day and we never talked—”

“Because you were never around! You were either out with your friends getting drunk or high or you were in there playing video games because you’d had a ‘hard day.’ So, no. I didn’t want to talk to you when I knew you weren’t even listening in the first place.”

 He leans against the counter and crosses his arms. Angry. Indignant. “You resented me. You resented the fact that we were together and you resented that I wasn’t perfect like your precious new friends—”

“Oh, that’s—” You pinch the bridge of your nose and force in a deep breath. “No. I didn’t want you to be like them. I didn’t want you to act pretentious and stuffy and talk about the stock market every goddamn second of the day. The only thing I resented…was the fact that you wouldn’t take care of yourself.”

“I was taking care of myself—”

“Bullshit. You were doing drugs—you were doing cocaine—and you weren’t eating, you weren’t sleeping, you nearly drunk yourself to death—”

“Right, but I wasn’t doing it all the time. It was just…it was occasionally, and it wasn’t a lot—”

“I don’t care. You shouldn’t have been doing it at all, Harry,” you finally shout. “You…you scared the shit out of me. Every time one of your friends would call and say you were passed out, I thought…I thought this was it. I thought I was gonna lose you. Do you know how many times I just sat on the floor and cried because I was so scared? Because you never wanted to listen when I told you to stop? Because you were so sure you were invincible?”

He seems pained by this, features wilting as he takes a tentative step forward. But he stops when you move back. “Poppy, I wasn’t trying to scare you, I…I didn’t know—”

“Yes, you did,” you scoff. “I told you, over and over that I didn’t want to lose you, but you thought I was being dramatic.”

He nods once. “I know, I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry?”

“Yeah. I am.” He looks at you. “S’why I stopped after we broke up. You were right, I needed to get my shit together.”

You nod, too. “Good. I’m glad.”

His gaze dances around the kitchen. “I hate that you changed everything,” he says again, and your heart wrenches. “I hate that it doesn’t look like it used to. I hate that I hurt you so bad that you felt like you had to erase everything I ever touched.”

You step closer and wipe a tear from your cheek. “Yeah, I hate it, too. I hate that I had to. I hate that stupid mattress and I hate that my kitchen doesn’t look like a rainbow anymore and I really fucking hate that I have no one to dance with when I cook.”

His eyes soften as they find yours and in only a few seconds, he’s reaching for the belt on your robe and tugging you to him. Wrapping you in his arms as he presses you against his chest, the way he always used to when you were sad.

“No,” you argue weakly, although you do nothing to stop him. “No, you can’t…you can’t—”

“Yes, I can,” he retorts quietly. You feel his lips press to the top of your head. “You don’t get to cry over me anymore. You’re better than that now. You did what I couldn’t. You moved on. And I don’t get to ruin that for you.”

You sniffle as you run your hand down his stomach. “It wasn’t about moving on. I just needed to learn how to be strong enough for both of us.”

“Poppy,” he breathes and holds you tighter. “You shouldn’t have to be.”

And deep down…you know he’s right.

“Shit, just like that…a little closer. Good girl, hold yourself open for me, baby. Yeah.”

Doing your best to oblige, you slip your fingers between your folds as Harry nudges his nose closer. Kissing his way along your thighs before allowing his tongue to lick a very generous stripe up your pussy.

Round 2 is on the couch. Harry wanted the kitchen counter—nearly insisted on it, in fact—but you knew you didn’t want to ruin your favorite breakfast spot. And you weren’t about to just for him.

So, the couch it was. He complained about it as you got settled. He hates this new couch, too. The color, the lumpy cushions, the way it feels like you’re sinking when you sit. 

You told him you didn’t care. You loved it and if it annoyed him, that was a bonus.

Thankfully, he swallowed his complaints in favor of swallowing you. He tossed your robe open and pulled your thighs apart. And then he buried himself between the warmth of your pussy the way he always used to.

And you decided that maybe you don’t mind insomnia so much if this is the remedy.

“Missed this, too,” he says now as he nips at your clit. “God, you’ve always tasted so fucking good. S’fucking crazy, baby. Can’t ever get enough.”

“Sure,” you snort, head dropping back. “I’m sure you say that to all the girls—”

“No.” He shakes his head and his nose nudges the sensitive nerves as you whine. “No, there’s no other girls. Come on, did you really think there could be?”

“With a mouth like that? Yeah,” you admit. He laughs. “That’s how we met. You were such—fuck—such a player.”

“Maybe,” he concedes before mouthing at you again. “But nobody else has ever made me feel the way you do.”

You snort. “Where’d you learn that line?”

“It’s not a line. It’s the truth.”

“Harry. Come on. I know you.”

“Then you should know I don’t say shit I don’t mean.” He smooths his palms down your thighs in order to spread you just a bit further and see the way your hole flutters. “Oh, pretty girl. S’just drenched, hm? All sensitive from the last one…need Daddy to make it better?”

You scrunch your nose. “You don’t get to call yourself that anymore.”

“No?” He grins. “Why not?”

“Because I hate you and Daddy is reserved for someone I like.”

He tsks. “I don’t know, kind of seems like you still like it. Keep clenching around my tongue like you wanna hear me say it again.”

You hesitate as you weave your fingers through his curls. “Never.”

He hums and the vibration against your cunt makes your thighs twitch. “Come on, baby. Don’t be mean to Daddy.”

You want to glare. Slap at him, refuse him. But he’s right—you have missed the moniker. If only just because of how good he sounds when he says it. So, you let him tease you and taunt you as he tastes you. You let him do whatever the hell he wants because your second orgasm feels stronger than the first and you don’t imagine you’ll survive this one. 

He slips a finger in as well. Beckons your pleasure closer with every curl of the large digit. It’s practiced. He sucks and licks and nips and thrusts and curls and pumps all at the same time.

Then, he pulls back and brings his palm down in a sharp smack to your pussy. 

“Stop squirming,” he instructs, then shoots you an obviously pleased frown. “Don’t be a brat.”

“M’not,” you whimper. “Not a brat…just wanna cum.”

“Do you, hm?” He licks you again then adds two fingers. “Should I let you?”

“Obviously.”

“Obviously?” He’s smirking now as he starts to go faster. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe you do deserve it. Yeah? After being so nice as to let me in.”

You pout. “Mhm.”

He’s so happy. He’s always his happiest when he’s suffocating himself with your pussy. He does everything he knows you love. He leaves teasing kisses to the inside of your thighs. He slaps at your leg, your clit, your hip. He helps rock you against his tongue and even lifts you from the couch to find a deeper angle. 

And he does all of this out of sheer enjoyment. 

“Harry,” you whimper as you melt into the cushions. Your limbs feel like jello. The pleasure is everywhere, and he looks like a god. His face is covered in you, glistening about as bright as the stars.

“I know, Poppy,” he says. He kisses your pussy and then smiles at you. “I know.”

You like the way Harry’s chest feels. Warm and soft and painted in the tattoos you used to trace with your finger.

He’s gently scratching your back as you both lay in bed. The room is quiet—you haven’t spoken in minutes. Still, neither of you can seem to find sleep and you know you’ll desperately need it soon. 

But this is nice. Even if it is the last time. You like getting to reminisce—pretend for even a moment that things are the way they used to be. When you were happy and safe and content to be together.

You weren’t sure you’d ever feel this kind of peace again.

“I missed you, too, you know,” he whispers after a moment.

You glance up. 

“I didn’t just miss your apartment. I missed you.” He takes a breath and runs his palm along your spine. “I miss our Sunday mornings and I miss when we’d watch scary movies just so we could make out and I miss the way you used to dance around in your underwear to some stupid musical you were obsessed with.”

You swallow a lump in your throat. “Har…”

“And I don’t know what happened,” he says. “I felt like…I felt like I was watching you do all these amazing things and I just couldn’t keep up. You were getting promoted and moving up and I was still at the fucking bar serving drinks. And you knew what you wanted to do. I didn’t.”

“I didn’t know,” you argue gently. “Not really. I hate my job. I hate that I don’t enjoy it the way I used to. I mean, I like that it pays the bills, but maybe that shouldn’t be enough.”

He presses his cheek to the top of your head. “You should do what makes you happy.”

“You used to make me happy.”

The soft strokes against your spine slow. 

“You did, Har,” you tell him. “So happy. That’s why I hated that we started fighting all of the time. I hated that you were gone or that I was gone or the fact that I was too ashamed to tell you that I missed you. And that I was scared we were losing each other.”

“Maybe we needed to lose each other,” he says and you feel sick. “Maybe we needed to be apart to see what we really wanted.”

You think about this. The idea sounds nice. Inviting. A happy end to a rather dreadful story.

But you both know better. Five months has taught you better.

“There’s a reason we broke up,” you finally murmur. “We didn’t…we didn’t like each other anymore. We were holding each other back—”

“I liked you,” he says softly. “I loved you. Yeah, I was mad, but I didn’t just stop loving you.” 

“Maybe you should have. Maybe it would have been easier for us and we wouldn’t be…here.”

More silence. It stretches for what feels like hours.

And then, “I can’t sleep because of you.”

You suck in a quiet breath. “What?”

“When Josie told me that you were seeing someone, I couldn’t…I couldn’t stop thinking about it. And she showed me a picture she took of you guys and you were so happy. Smiling at him like you used to smile at me and I just…I didn’t know what to do.”

Another pause. You don’t know what to say.

“I put my fist through a wall,” he tells you. “And somehow, that still didn’t hurt as much as knowing you’d moved on.”

You snake your arm around his middle and snuggle closer. “Harry, you knew we both had to move on eventually.”

“Did we?”

“Harry…”

“But so soon? It’s only been five months.”

“Yeah. Five months to grieve you and cry over you and realize I did this for you.” You close your eyes. Tight. “We’re better people now.”

“No, we’re tired people now,” he teases, and you smile. “And I think I’ll be losing sleep over you for the rest of my life.”

“Don’t say that.”

“I mean it. I’m always gonna think about you. Think about what I did wrong. What I could have done better.”

“I fucked up, too,” you argue. “I should have told my parents. And our friends. I should have talked to you more, asked you to do more things together. You’re right, I was ashamed of you. Of this…routine we’d fallen into. And I’m sorry.”

He says nothing. After all, there’s nothing more to say.

But he kisses the crown of your head and it speaks louder than any words.

“Fuck…fuck, Poppy, please—”

You grin as you lick your lips. He’s always sounded the most beautiful when he’s begging. And his best begging always tends to happen when his cock is down your throat. 

“What, Daddy?” you ask innocently. “What do you need me to do?”

His eyes roll back and he grips the sheets in his fist. “Please…”

You reposition yourself over his legs as you dip back down to have another taste. You lick and you suck and you stroke until he’s making another strained noise that sounds like sex.

You hope your neighbors can hear. You bet they missed him.

“Good boy,” you purr, squeezing his thighs as you take him even further. 

He sucks in a sharp breath through gritted teeth before his hand finds your hair and he squeezes. “Easy…easy, baby. S’been a while. Don’t hurt yourself—”

You respond to his instruction by inhaling through your nose and relaxing the muscles in your throat. Allowing him to hit the back the way he always used to.

His head drops into the pillows. “Shit—Poppy, I mean it. M’not gonna fuck your throat. It’s gonna hurt and I don’t wanna hurt you anymore.”

It’s an oddly thoughtful gesture but it does nothing for you now. Instead, you shake your head and pull off, a string of saliva dripping down his cock in your wake. “I’m fine, H. Trust me, I can take it.”

“Yeah?” He pushes up onto his elbows. “Is Crocs with Tube Socks hung or something?”

You grin. “No. But that dildo you got me last year is.”

He blinks. “You…fucking hell, you fuck your throat with that?”

“Mhm.” You swirl your tongue around his tip as he curses. “And then I fuck myself. And I pretend it’s you.”

He tightens his hold on your hair and forces your eyes back to his. “Are you serious?”

You nod, now feeling a touch shy as you wipe your mouth with your knuckles. “Yeah…I know that’s…probably weird, but…I mean, you got it for me, so I thought I’d be weirder to think about someone else—”

“No, it’s…” He stops. Struggles. “Shit, I really needed to hear that.”

“Oh, you did, huh?” 

“Yeah. I wouldn’t want you to think about anyone else when you used it, either. It’s got my fucking initials on it.”

You laugh, louder than you mean to and it makes him grin. “Yeah, it does, doesn’t it? It was a pretty good gift, I’ll admit.”

“S’a fucking perfect gift,” he retorts. “We had a lot of fun with that dildo.”

“We did indeed.”

“But apparently not as much fun as you’re having with it.”

“Fucking myself helps me sleep,” you remind him. “So sometimes it’s necessity.”

“Is that right?” 

“Mhm.” You squeeze the base and he twitches. “You used to watch me. Remember?”

“I do.” His eyes get darker. “Do you fuck yourself a lot?”

“…these days, yeah. Apparently, I can’t sleep all that well, either.”

“And does it work?”

“Most of the time, yeah.” You turn your attention back to his cock in order to avoid his curiosity before you quietly admit, “Sometimes I pretend you’re here. Sleeping next to me. And…that helps, too.”

He reaches for your wrist and pulls your attention back. “Poppy—”

“No, don’t look at me like that, it’s dumb—”

“I imagine you, too.”

You blink. “You do?”

“Every night. Except the past couple weeks. Cause now I just think about you and him. And then I can’t fucking sleep.”

You turn your hand so your fingers brush through his. “Shit. We’re a mess.”

He smiles. “Yeah.”

The conversation falls away as you dip back down to resume your work. Squeezing his balls, moaning as you take him on your tongue, and milking him for every last drop. 

Turns out, you missed the taste of him, too.

Morning comes before either of you find a moment of rest. But you can feel yourself growing tired. Your eyelids are beginning to droop, and your body feels incredibly spent. 

Turns out, round 4 is where the magic happened. He brought out your favorite vibrator and teased your poor, swollen clit with it until you squirted. It was easy and quick and he seemed rather delighted to be bathed in you.

Until, of course, you insist on an actual bath to clean you both.

The shower felt good. The warm water washing away the sticky sweat on your skin. And the two of you fell back into a similar routine. He ran the soap down your arms and you washed his curls with your favorite shampoo. A shampoo he claimed he looked everywhere for after you broke up but could never find.

He said he missed the smell. The way it made his hair so soft. And the way it would make his pillowcase smell just like you.

You were grateful that the shower hid your tears.

You both crashed on the couch after you had dried off. The sheets still needed to be cleaned and neither of you could be bothered. But, as it turned out, the couch was growing on him. And he begrudgingly admitted it was rather comfy as the two of you curled up in your usual spot. 

You know you’re both close to sleep. Finally, after all your efforts to get here. But you also know that once you wake up, Harry will leave. 

And there’s a chance you won’t see him again.

You know that nothing has changed. The two of you still want different things, even if you want each other. And you hate that that’s not enough. That what you want and what you should want don’t align.

Instead, he’ll move on with his life and you’ll move on with yours.

But you don’t want to learn how to fall asleep without him.

“Make me a deal,” you whisper.

He hums. Lashes shut tight as the morning light slips in through the window. “What?”

“If I wake up, and you’re still here…we do this again. Not…as a couple. But as two broken humans that find rest with each other.”

His eyes open.

“But if you’re gone,” you continue, “then we don’t. We don’t do it again, we don’t see each other again, we don’t reach out again. We cut ties. Officially. Block and move on. For real.”

He seems saddened by this, and you hate that you’ve made him sad. But you both know it’s for the best. This won’t be sustainable in the long run. And maybe it’s a bad idea to continue at all, but maybe you want to hold on to him anyway. At least for a little while.

Even if it’s just as friends.

Exes.

Two broken humans that used to make each other whole.

His lips press together and he nods once. “Deal,” he agrees, and you can tell by the look on his face, he’s already made a decision.

You aren’t sure which way, but you suppose you’ll find out soon enough. So, you allow your eyes to fall shut and your dreams to take hold. Melting into his arms and into the sofa as you finally find sleep quicker than you have in months.

You’re not sure how long you’re out. It feels like hours. A heavy slumber that leaves you rather refreshed as your eyes eventually flutter open. 

You don’t see Harry as you slowly adjust to your surroundings. And you don’t feel him, either. But you’re too afraid to really look. To sit up and realize that he’s gone. For good.

And then, just when you think you’ve lost him…you hear the most beautiful sound in the world.

“Good morning, Poppy.”

Taglist: @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @keepdrivingkisses @swiftmendeshoran @tiredinwinter @straightontilmornin @justlemmeadoreyou @harrysdaydreams @tiaamberxx @peterparker1sgf @myfavfanficsever @littlenatilda @vamprry @fdl305 @tchalametishot @ssaama @indierockgirrl @likeapplejuicenpeach @vane28282 @lukesaprince @closureesny @lc-fics @0nlythrowharrybeaux @hannahdressedasabanana @iguessyourejustwhatineeded @dylanobandposts21 @butdaddyilovehim-hs @floral-recs @itjustkindahappenedreally @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @laelamarley @myalovesharry

[slytherinsprincesss]

**MC staring longingly at Sebastian across the room being idiotic**

Poppy: So why aren’t you and Sebastian dating again?

MC: Because I’d destroy him…

Ominis: Trust me, he’d definitely be into that.

[letmeinimafairy]

A commission for @dramatic-opening-shot , James and Francis, finally free, walking somewhere beyond. For some reason for me arctic poppies are deeply associated with the other side now.

[maraudersthesis]

Hello! I'm 21 years old. I'm an Argentine Communications student. I'm writing my thesis on how fanon is built within fandoms. Please rb to help me reach more people.

I'm looking for a way to get in contact with the legendary MsKingBean89,

in hopes they'll be kind enough to grant me an interview. It'd be (of course) under that username, and I'M NOT GOING TO ASK FOR ANY PERSONAL INFORMATION. All I need is a short interview (could be written, but I'm okay doing it over voice call or any other way they prefer) about the Marauders fandom and the fanon.

This may be a long shot, but it's worth trying.

I've been in the fandom for a while, so when I had to choose a topic for my thesis I knew I had to do something like this. I've always been fascinated by the way the fandom works, how we create all this content we identify as The Marauders™, even though there isn't a lot of canon information about the characters and their story. I love the personalities we've given them, all the symbols we identify them with, and all the relationships we've created.

I'm studying the way people interact on the internet and the colective creation that results of that interaction.

If you want to talk about this, the Marauders or have any suggestions or ideas I'd love to chat!!

Edit: this is a sideblog, so I can't follow back/send asks/like posts, but I'd like to thank anyone who reblogs this: you're helping me get my degree and I appreciate that a lot.

[congressoutofwedlock]

Guilt

Total time: 9 hours (4 hours lining and sketching, 5 hours coloring and rendering)

Please feel free to zoom in and spot all of the tiny details. There are some easter eggs pertaining to the positioning of Merlahad & Percilot.

[fierymiasma]

❀ And You Look Fetching in Yellow ❀ // Sebastian Sallow x f!MC

Summary: Hogwarts couples exchange scarves to signify their intention with each other. Unfortunately for Sebastian, MC is new to the whole magic thing.

It's been weeks since Sebastian had gifted her his scarf. And yet nothing romantic has happened between them.

How was she supposed to know that she had to give him something in return?

Part 1: You Look Better In Green

♪ Tags: Slight Dark!Sebastian, angst, sadness, manipulation, making out, heartbreak

Word Count: 5k

|| Masterlist || AO3 ||

"Did you see what the new girl was wearing?"

"Obviously, do I look like I live under a troll's bridge?  The whole school is talking about it!"

Sebastian preened, sitting a bit straighter in his seat.  He had been lounging on a bench with Ominis in the Dark Arts Tower, bored out of his mind.  About ten paces away, a gaggle of 3rd year girls were giggling and loudly whispering amongst themselves.  The student body of Hogwarts never had anything better to do then to guess who started courting who.  Sebastian had never cared much about this (often incorrect) news, having always found it dull. 

But it was looking like Hogwarts was just about to get bit more interesting.

"What was she wearing?" one of the shorter girls asked.

"She was wearing a Slytherin scarf!" another whispered conspiratiously as if it was an unspeakable secret.

There were gasps around the group.  The new Hufflepuff student?  Wearing Slytherin's green and silver scarf?  It could only mean one thing.

"Ohhhh, she's seeing from someone from Slytherin."  There was much fervent whispering.

"I bet so many hearts are crushed now.  Someone finally got to her first."

Sebastian couldn't' help but puff out his chest.  Finally, in his time as a 6th year at Hogwarts, the natural order of things were being corrected.  No longer did he have to worry seeing his Hufflepuff in ugly red and yellow. 

"Who do you reckon gave it to her?" one of the Ravenclaws bounced on the tip of her toes. 

"Well, there's not that many Slytherin boys that she associates herself with."

Sebastian grinned.  He leaned back against the wall, crossing his hands behind his head.  He was constantly next to her side whether that meant on the battlefield or at the library.  His devotion to her had most definitely discouraged any potential suitors who thought they were worthy of wasting her time.  An effortless arm thrown around her shoulder.  His coarse hand tucking a strand of hair behind her ears.  His chin resting on her much shorter head.  Now that the whole school knew that the most amazing girl in all of Hogwarts history was his, Sebastian's worries could finally-

"I heard from someone in Charms that it's Ominis."

Sebastian stilled.  What?

There were squeals of delight.

"Of course!  That makes so much sense! They look so cute together!"

Sebastian scowled.  No they didn't. 

"Awww, I'm so happy for them.  I bet he swept her off her feet!" 

"It's the eyes isn't it?  All the Gaunt kids have those gorgeous eyes."

In Sebastian's personal opinion, blue eyes were incredibly overrated.

"That makes so much sense!  They're always in the library studying together."

One of their voices took a cheekily tone.  "Studying?  Is that what the kids are calling it now a days?"

Yes, Ominis and his Hufflepuff were always studying together, only because Sebastian invited both of his best friends to his study session.

The group of girls all squealed bouncing up and down like a group of Puffskeins.  They were loud and annoying enough that Professor Hecat had opened the doors to her classroom.  With heavy scolding, the professor shooed them outside, to spread their gossip elsewhere in the castle no doubt.

Sebastian felt as though he took a troll club to the head. That was his green scarf around his Hufflepuff.  It was Sebastian's scarf that she was wearing every day.  Not Garret's.  Not Natty's. Not even Ominis's.  It was Sebastian's.  Turning to stare at his best friend, he was startled to find that Ominis was still engrossed in his book.  The other boy looked completely at ease, as if Sebastian's entire life hadn't been entirely upended.

"What," Sebastian spat through gritted teeth, "in Merlin's name, was that all about?"

·͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙

The hero of Hogwarts laid on her back like a starfish on the grounds of the Transfiguration courtyard.  Having successfully commandeered a quiet corner of the courtyard with Natty and Poppy, she tried her best to relax between classes.  Poppy was playing with Gerald.  Natty attempted hastily to finish her astronomy homework before the next toll of the bell.  The ancient magic user scowled at the bright blue cloudless sky as if it personally had cursed her.   

She was still wearing Sebastian's scarf.  The new Hufflepuff hadn't taken it off since Sebastian had kindly (or possessively?) wrapped it around her.  His signature bergamot and oak scent was starting to fade. 

She had learned quite quickly the ins and outs of courting at Hogwarts thanks to her friends.  Coming from the muggle world, it was dizzyingly confusing all the fake rules that witches and wizards put upon themselves.  She wasn't sure if it was wizard conservatism or teenage boredom that forced the students of Hogwarts to play these stupid courting games.

Wearing another House's colors was a walking advertisement to the rest of Hogwarts that you were officially being pursued by classmate of another House.  The second that a Gryffindor was caught wearing green and silver or a Ravenclaw was caught wearing red the whole school would erupt in commotion and gossip.  

In her opinion, the student body of Hogwarts needed to go outside more.  Experience some of the real world for once. 

After all it was their coy games that put her in this whole mess.  She thought, as any rational being would, that after a whole year's worth of 'dates', alone, unsupervised, not under the watch of any adult, that something more would come of her relationship with Sebastian.  She had hoped by now she would be wrapped in his strong arms with his green scarf wrapped around the both of them, joining them together. 

She had thought wrong.  Instead, it was the still the same Sebastian.  Teasing tone, seductive one-liners, coy looks when he thought she wasn't watching.  He always held her at an arm's length, never getting too close.  Despite all of his flirty comments, he never made a verbal hint that they were anything more than friends. 

Ugh, this was all so maddening.  If she had it her way, she would march right up to Sebastian, grab him by the beautiful luscious curls of his, and kiss him silly until he finally got the message through that thick skull of his.

"Why isn't my brilliant plan working?"  She whined as she laid beneath the sky, as if hoping it would give her the answers.

"What plan?"  Natty asked, not looking up from her astronomy homework.  "Your mind has been up in the clouds all day."

She groaned, throwing her arm over her eyes to block out the sun.  "Why hasn't Sebastian made a pass at me yet.  For Merlin's sake, we went to Three Broomsticks and Sirona gave us her Valentine's Day Special.  We shared it, together.  Using one spoon, like a couple."

"Have you considered that Sebastian might think you two are actually exclusive?" Poppy interjected.  "I mean, you're wearing his scarf.  That has to count for something."

The new student groaned.  She started ripping the grass next to her in frustration.  "I don't think we're dating.  At least, I don't think Sebastian Sallow is the type to not snog his girlfriend silly when she drops obvious hints."

Poppy made a show of gagging at the thought of her friends making out.  In retaliation, the other Hufflepuff half-hearted threw some of the plucked grass in Poppy's general direction.  The strands lamely flew everywhere but their intended target.

Natty sighed, brushing the grassy debris from her astronomy chart.  "Honestly, Europe is so behind.  Back at home, things were much simpler.  Girls do not have to wait for the man to ask them to be in a relationship!  Anyone could do the asking!  All of this exchanging of clothes is so silly to me.  What if two people from the same House start dating?  Then what? This makes no sense to me."

Poppy hummed in agreement.  "Dating at Hogwarts does seem like such a headache compared to Uganda, Natty.  But," she squeezed Gerald tightly, "you can't deny how cute it is when you see the couples together wearing each other clothing.  They're so mismatched and adorable."  Poppy paused awkwardly.  "Come to think of it, I've never seen Sebastian wearing even a hint of yellow."

The air stilled.  Both Poppy and Natty turned to stare at their friend who was still in the process of pulling out all of the blades of grass in her vicinity.  It was a long awkward moment before the hero of Hogwarts realized that her two good friends were looking at her, expecting a reaction out of the wallowing girl.

"What?" She asked.

Poppy gave her a pitying look.  "You…you did give Sebastian your scarf right?"

The new student blinked owlishly, her hands stilled in their destructive action. 

Natty sighed.  "A hat?  Your tie?  Cufflinks?  Merlin's beard, even your socks would do.  Anything?"

For being a wielder of ancient magic, she sure didn't have a clue as to wizarding culture.  "Um, no?  Was I supposed to?"

Both girls groaned.  Natty shook her head, disappointed in the lack of charisma her friend had.  Poppy looked at her pitifully as if she was the runt of a Niffler litter.

"What?  We're supposed to trade scarves?  Who made up that rule?  Is that why Sebastian hasn't made a move on me?"

"YES!"  The other girls replied, getting fed up with the drama.

"No one told me about this!"

The three girls bickered back and forth, homework now entirely forgotten.  So lost in debate, they missed the Slytherin that was approaching them.

Imelda Reyes, captain of the Slytherin team, stood in front of them, interrupting the trio of girls.  "Oh good, the losers are all gathered together."  She looked rather bored as if she would rather be on the field than here.

Poppy frowned.  Gerald stuck his tongue out at the offending girl.  "Imelda, why do you keep calling your only friends at Hogwarts losers?"

Imelda ignored the remark, flipped her hair behind her shoulders.  "It keeps the fans in line.  Got to remind you lot of your place."

The Slytherin girl turned her sights onto the other Hufflepuff who was still wallowing in the grass in self-pity.  "Anyway, I came to collect on my good deed.  Some token of appreciation would be nice.  Even a thanks would do."

The Hufflepuff sighed.  She pinched her nose in frustration at the annoyance that was Imelda Reyes.  Rolling over to her side, she faced the Slytherin captain.  She propped up her chin on her hand.  Nothing that Imelda ever have to share was interesting.  "Imelda, what is it now?  Why should I be groveling at your feet for this time?"

"You should be thanking me for saving your relationship with Sallow."  Imelda nonchalantly stated.

The new girl spluttered, her chin slipping off of her hand and hitting the ground.  She made a pained noise, rubbing at the growing bruise.  "Excuse me?"

"You heard me."  Imelda inspected her glossy green nails.  "It's painful to see you two fumbling about like Quidditch little league toddlers.  I just gave a gentle nudge in the right direction."

The bottom of her stomach was in free-fall.  Imelda "helping" was never a good thing, despite what the Slytherin believed.  "Imelda, what did you do?"

Imelda grinned.  "Oh, you know, just started a rumor that Ominis was the one who gave you the scarf."

She finally sat up.  Bits of grass stick to the Hufflepuff's hair.  "Why on earth would you do that, Imelda?  The whole school is going to think that Ominis is courting me!"

"Indeed."

Natty frowned.  "I have to admit.  I do not see the game you are trying to play.  How does that help our friend?" 

Imelda rolled her eyes.  It was sometimes frustrating being the only Slytherin of their girl group.  They were so slow to stack the odds to get what they wanted.  They were so narrow-minded as they achieved their goals, seeing only a couple paths towards victory instead of the millions of possibilities Imelda always saw.

"Boys like Sallow are easy to manipulate.  Start a rumor that his best friend is seeing the love of his life, and the boy will make sure to do everything in his power to correct the record."  Imelda flicked off a speck of dirt on her otherwise well-polished nails.  "He'll come crawling back to you in a week tops."

Poppy oo'ed in approval, clapping excitedly at the new development.  Natty shot her a judging look.  Poppy dropped her "oo's" to a respectful volume.

The other Hufflepuff gaped in silence, at a loss for words.  "Sebastian's one of the smartest people I know.  He can pick up even the most difficult spells on the first try." She crossed her arms.  "He's too smart to fall for your tricks, Imelda."

Her compatriots were silent. Natty, Poppy, and Imelda ginned and looked at each other deviously.  Poppy was the first to bust out in laughter, causing the other two to join in.  The offended girl scowled behind her green scarf, annoyed.

The Hufflepuff rolled her eyes.  "You all think so low of him.  I'm telling you, Sebastian's not the type to care about this sort of petty thing.  You'll see."

"Oh, we'll see alright." Imelda sneered.  "I bet my best broomstick that your Slytherin will come crawling back to you on his knees.  Why I bet he's foaming at the mouth right now."  

·͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙

Sebastian was practically foaming at the mouth.  He wanted to scream and pull his hair out.  Back in the sanctuary of his dorm room, he could finally take off the mask of indifference he'd been wearing all day.  Ever since he eavesdropped on the rumors surrounding the new student, they have followed him incessantly, mocking him.  It seems like all the students, all the professors, even the godforsaken portraits were talking about the 'newest couple in Hogwarts'.  How on earth that anyone could see her and Ominis actually together was beyond him. 

Speaking of Ominis, Sebastian glanced over at his friend who was sitting comfortably in his own bed, reading a book in braille.  Ominis looked serene as if he was above the petty comments of the commoners of Hogwarts.

Suspiciously aloof in Sebastian's opinion.

"How are you not bothered by all of this?" Sebastian asked.  He squinted his eyes, trying to see if he could catch Ominis in the act of trickery.

Ominis sighed, marking his place in his book before closing it with an air of finality.  He had foolishly hoped that the silly rumors going around Hogwarts wouldn't upset his best friend too much.  The students of Hogwarts were constantly talking Sebastian after all.  Gossiping about his charm around the female students, about his duels, about him getting detention for the second time that week.  Sebastian was never bothered by gossip, seeming revealing in it.

This rumor was different, it would seem.

"I'm not sure what you're on about."  Ominis tried.

Sebastian could smell something was up.  "Don't you play dumb with me.  You know exactly what I'm referring to.  The whole school thinks our new friend is seeing you.  Now, I believe that the heresy isn't true."  Sebastian's voice threatened to crack.  "Is there any reason to believe otherwise?"

The accused boy huffed, rolling his eyes.  "Merlin, Sebastian, you really live up to the infamous Slytherin jealousy."

"Don't you avoid the subject."  Sebastian said.

Ominis frowned, confused.  "Why don't you just correct the rumors?  Haven't you been courting her the whole time?"

Sebastian scowled, turning away from his friend, hiding the disappointment on his face.  He'd thought that everything was going so well.  Her secretive smiles and stolen glances whenever she thought Sebastian wasn't looking her way.  The way she stared openly and unapologetically mid-duel as his muscles strained under the force of his spells.

"No, we're just friends, Ominis." Sebastian responded stiffly.  "That's all there is too it." 

Sebastian had thought that she returned his affections, especially when she accepted his scarf, a calling card of his intentions to woo her.  He thought things were going even better when she invited him to an date to Three Broomsticks, reminiscing about their first of many troll attacks.  Sebastian thought the date had gone perfectly when he walked her like a gentleman to her dorm.

It wasn't until she bid him a cordial, kind but only friendly, goodbye that he had realized how wrong he was.  She had not returned to give Sebastian her own yellow and black scarf, a token of her acceptance towards the courting.  And Sebastian had stood in front of the wine casket that hid the Hufflepuff common room, scarfless, lamenting in what an absolute fool he had been.

Ominis's frown deepened.  "Enough of this nonsense, Sebastian.  She's interested in you.  I mean, half of the female population is.  I can hear the way you two talk to each other."

Sebastian chuckled darkly.  "If that were true, I'd be wearing a yellow scarf."

It had stung.  The blatant, but very gentle rejection that she had given him.  Sebastian wasn't raised to be a troll to woman, and Anne had taught him to be better than his peers, so he allowed himself a few days to wallow before swallowing his pride.  It was privilege enough that she would be friends with him after all that had happened in their 5th year.

He was an idiot for thinking that someone as amazing as her would want to be with someone who's done so much bad as him.

Ominis shook his head.  "I'm sorry, Sebastian, but I am convinced that something is afoot between the two of you.  As both your friend and her friend, I can say without a shadow of doubt that the feelings are mutual.  I think the time for games is finished.  You must confess your feelings towards her."

Sebastian scoffed at the ridiculous notion.  It's like Ominis wasn't even listening to him.  Sebastian had literally just finished explaining how not interested she was in him.

"Gyffindors don't have a monopoly on courage, Sebastian."  Ominis chided.  "We Slytherins are brave enough to get what we want.  We always have been."

Sebastian narrowed his eyes.  He could feel the venom on his tongue.  "Oh?  How's courting my sister working for you?"

Sebastian wasn't sure what reaction he was expecting from Ominis.  What Sebastian was for sure not expecting was for a blush to creep its way up Ominis's neck.  His best friend sat ramrod straight, as still as a statute.  Ominis was incapable of schooling his expression and looked like a child who was caught in a lie.

Sebastian's mouth dropped at Ominis's shift in demeanor.  While he had some suspicions over the nature of Ominis's outings beyond Hogwarts grounds, it was a different matter entirely to have confirmation that Ominis was attempting to woo his twin sister. 

The two boys were quiet, frozen in place.  The air in the dorms was stifling and awkward. 

Ominis cleared his dry throat, very comfortable with pretending that he was also selectively deaf.  "Well, anyways, it is my humble opinion that our friend is head over heels for you.  All you need to do is ask."

Sebastian threw up his arms.  He was going to get nowhere with this infuriating boy.  Giving up, he collapsed, face first, on his bed, defeated.

·͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙

The Hufflepuff sighed, chewing on the end of her quill.  Sitting on one of the dusty decrepit armchairs of the Undercroft, she relished in these moments of silence.  No one, student, professor, or villager, was asking anything of her.  Instead, she could simply be alone with her thoughts.

Unfortunately, her thoughts often revolved around Sebastian.

She rested her head against her fist and blew a raspberry in frustration.  The parchment before her was riddled with crossed out phrases and giant bleeding blotches of ink where her quill had paused.  She had spent the whole afternoon trying to come up with…something to say to Sebastian.  Four hours of work only to come up with nothing.  Ugh.  Why did words have to be so hard?

Maybe everyone was right.  It would be much easier just to throw him a Hufflepuff jumper and call it a day.

Before she could finalize her thoughts, the iron gates of the Undercroft swung open.  She hastily stuffed the quill and parchment into a random pocket in her bags.  She couldn't help but fix her hair, just in case it was Sebastian.

In walked the very man who had been on her mind all day.  And Sebastian Sallow looked rather miffed.  Hands already clenched in frustrations, he walked up to her.  His eyes trailed up and down her form.

"What are you wearing?" he asked without preamble.

There was a sense of deja vu at the question.  "My school uniform?  Because…I go here?  I'm a Hogwarts student?"

Sebastian frowned.  "Where's your scarf?"

She huffed.  Really?  Out of millions of important things they had to talk about: Sebastian's behavior, Anne, their maybe date, their questionable relationship status.  Her scarf was the thing he chose to fixate on?  "It's warm outside, Sebastian.  Why on earth would I be wearing a scarf in the spring?"

He scowled, now pacing unable to contain his anxiety.  So she decided not to wear his scarf anymore.  What did this mean?  This only proved Sebastian's theory that she did reject his affections.  Ominis's words of encouragement last night only worsened Sebastian's current mood.  Ominis had no idea what he was talking about.  Maybe after all this time, she finally learned the symbolism behind the gifted scarf and was appalled at Sebastian's rather forward claim on her.  Maybe the rumors were to be believed, and she was interested in Ominis.  Maybe her and Ominis "studying at the library together" actually had no studying whatsoever.  Maybe-

His thoughts got interrupted when something rather soft smacked him square in the face.  Whatever the scratchy material was had hit in right in his open eyes.  His eyes watered, stinging at the insult.

"What in Merlin's beard?"  He ripped the offending fabric off his face.

In his hands was a warm, yellow and black striped Hufflepuff scarf.  The one that she had worn throughout the fall.  The one that always managed to hide her teasing smiles and blushes.  It smelled of their shared apple tarts and a bit singed at the edges as if one of her Confringo spells exploded a bit too close for comfort.

It smelled like her. 

He looked up to catch her gaze.  She was leaning with all her weight on one foot with her arms crossed, slightly annoyed at the silly affair.

Sebastian recovered quickly.  He couldn't stop the grin from his face.  He felt like he was back to his old self, just like how he was when the two of them first met.  "Well, well, I was waiting for you to pay me back eventually.  Nice to know that Hufflepuffs have some manners."

She huffed, tired of these games and double-speak.  "You know, if you don't want it, you can always give it back."

"Now hold on,"  Sebastian cut her off, already wrapping it possessively around his neck in intricate woven pattern so tight so she couldn't even separate it from him if he tried.  "I never said I didn't appreciate the gift."

She rolled her eyes.  Walking up to him, she picked at the scarf on instinct, fluffing it in a more comfortable manner for him.  "This is frankly so dumb." 

He hummed in delight at his Hufflepuff fussing over him.  With her so close to him now, he felt like a purring Kneazle.  "Well, as dumb as you think it is, I think I look rather fetching in yellow.  Don't you think so, sweetheart?"

She choked on her spit, hands frozen on her scarf.  She missed the safety of the green and silver scarf that allowed her to hide her expressions from the world around her.  With a scarlet face, she muttered.  "Sebastian Sallow, you know I find you attractive."

Sebastian smirked, preening under her words.

Whatever speech she had drafted now forgotten in favor of venting her frustrations out onto him.  "You should also know that you drive me absolutely bonkers.  I just can't believe we had to go through this whole song and dance.  Merlin, I've been drunk on the Amortentia that is you, Sebastian Sallow, for a whole two years now." Her hands tighten the grip that she had on hers (now Sebastian's?) yellow scarf.  "I've been in love with you ever since you first took me to Hogsmeade.  Merlin's beard, Sebastian, I've taken you as my companion to every poacher duel I can think of.  We explore the most dangerous dungeons together.  We fight off foul Acromantulas together.  And it takes a silly yellow scarf for you to finally realize my feelings for you?"

She finally looked up at him, her fierce eyes finding his.  What she wasn't expecting was a rare moment of vulnerability on Sebastian's face.  The confident charming boy before her looked uncertain all of a sudden.

His rough hands reached up to gently meet hers, holding her in place.  "Why would someone as good as you want someone who's done so much evil like me?"

And therein laid the truth of Sebastian's fears.  If the savior of Hogwarts was too good for people as dull and drab as Garreth or Prewett, then in what world would she want to be with someone who had so much blood on his hands as Sebastian?  No, she deserved the best.  And it certainly wasn't someone like him.

She was flabbergasted.  She was so used to the Sebastian Sallow she first met.  The boy whose Slytherin ambitions urged him to greedily take what was rightfully his.  Where was the young brash and carefree optimistic boy whose boldness and forwardness had charmed her? 

She gently removed her hands from his.  His expression was caged off from her.  Gently, she reached up to caress his face, angling his chin slightly downwards so he could look at her in the eye.  He turned to her, like a wilting flower dying for the sun.  The walls around him melted as his knitted brow soften to look at her.

"Sebastian, you are rash and reckless.  You are possessive and incredibly jealous, even though you have no reason to be."  The other boy looked away, trying to pull away from her.  She held his chin in place forcing him to look at her.  He looked gorgeous in yellow. 

"You're also the most devoted person I know, devoted to Ominis, to Anne, to me.  You fight so fiercely to protect what is yours both on the battlefield and off of it.  Everything you have done, both the good and the awful, has been because of your love.  Everything that you are, your recklessness, your kindness, has been because of your love, your devotion to those that you care for.  How could I not fall in love with you?"

The bright joyous colors brought a sunny aura to his usual darkened expressions.  The Hufflepuff scarf around his neck made him look lighter, more open to the possibilities around him.  The hues of yellow reflected the golden flecks that were hidden in his brown eyes.

He scoffed, trying not to think too hard at her words, not willing to break into a million pieces in front of her.  "You are so brilliant, sweetheart, you could have anyone you wanted in the world.  I'm just a boy from some hamlet who couldn't even save his sister."

Her shoulders softened.  Oh, Sebastian.  "That's not true.  I am here with you, Sebastian.  I am choosing to be here with you.  I will always choose to be here with you, in this moment."

He could see her eyes dip down to look at his lips.  And with that, it was like the weak dam to his flood of emotions was broken.  He surged forward catching her lips in his.  His hands flew up to cup both sides of her face, marveling at the beauty he was holding.  She responded in turn, throwing her hands around his neck.  She met the storm that was Sebastian with equal ferocity.  Her lips pressed forward, almost bruising him with the passionate intention behind it. 

He could feel the curl of her smile against his.  Her long eyelashes fluttered against his cheeks as if they were kissing the freckles that they found there.  She smelled of their shared apple tarts, and her lips were warm against his.  In her arms, he felt safe, like the world was created just for the two of them.

Lungs dying, he could barely stand ripping himself away from her.  He rested his forehead against hers, not wanting to let go of this moment even for a second.  His thumb was still caressing her cupped face, marveling at the miracle that was the savior of Hogwarts. 

"You should know, you are never getting your scarf back."  Sebastian quipped. 

She let out a breath of laughter.  Sebastian eagerly chased it with another quick kiss.  Later, much, much later, after he was finished kissing his darling silly, he'll walk out the Undercroft with a yellow scarf around his neck holding hands with his Hufflepuff wearing that green scarf of hers. 

[callmehopeless]

POPPY SWEETING - SIX OF PENTACLES (VI) Ominis | Sebastian | Garreth | Amit | Poppy | Natsai | Leander (Made for RoR using Midjourney, Canva & photo editors)

[ohnoema]

today I bring you: my fav lesbians

pls is there already a name for this ship? i just love them too much

[thatsoanjie]

When the wind settles

Sebastian Sallow x reader

Summary : After Ranrok was ended, a Goblin rebellion happened. This is 5 months after the rebellion, and everyone thought you were gone for good. Sebastian revisits Feldcroft in an attempt to find traces of you again, not knowing what's to come.

Word count : 1.5k

Notes : This one was a little heavier to write! Just had to get this one out of my mind.

TW : Mentions of su!c!dal ideation... read at your own discretion.

Read my disclaimer and fair use notice here

The ruins of Feldcroft lay still, a silent testament to the war that had ravaged the land. The village, once vibrant with life, was now a graveyard of memories, its cottages reduced to charred skeletons, its streets choked with debris. The air was heavy with the scent of damp earth and ashes, a grim reminder of all that had been lost. Snow had begun to fall again, soft and steady, as if the sky itself was mourning.

Sebastian Sallow stood in the center of what had once been his home, his heart as cold and lifeless as the stones scattered around him. It had been five months since the final battle of the Goblin Rebellion, five months since he had lost almost everything that mattered. Ominis and Anne were safe, and for that, he was grateful, but the knowledge did nothing to fill the void inside him.

Because you were gone.

The thought was a knife in his chest, a pain that had become as familiar as his own heartbeat. You had been his anchor, his hope, his everything. And now you were nothing more than a memory—a ghost that haunted his every waking moment. They had told him you were dead, that you had been lost in the chaos of the battle, your body never found. He had refused to believe it at first, had scoured the wreckage for any sign of you, but as the days turned into weeks, and the weeks into months, the terrible truth had settled in.

You were gone. And there was nothing he could do to change that.

The guilt was a constant companion, a weight he could never shake. You had been the best of them, the light that had kept him going through the darkest times. And now that light was extinguished, leaving him to stumble through the shadows alone.

He had come back to Feldcroft because there was nowhere else to go. The world outside was trying to rebuild, to move on, but Sebastian was stuck in the past, trapped in a moment that he couldn’t escape. The ruins of Feldcroft were all that was left of his old life, a desolate reflection of the emptiness he carried inside him. 

He wandered through the village, his steps slow and heavy, his mind lost in the memories of what had once been. He could still see it, as if the echoes of the past were imprinted on the air—the laughter of children playing in the streets, the warm glow of lanterns in the windows, the scent of freshly baked bread wafting from the cottages. But those memories were like ghosts, insubstantial and fleeting, impossible to hold on to.

Just like you.

Sebastian’s breath hitched as he reached the edge of the village, where the land sloped down toward the river. This had been your favorite spot, the place where you had always come to find peace, to escape from the burdens of the world. He could almost see you there, standing by the water, your hair catching the light as you turned to smile at him.

But it was just a memory. Just another ghost.

He closed his eyes, the ache in his chest unbearable. He didn’t know how to keep going without you, didn’t want to keep going. The world was a darker place without you in it, and he was so tired of stumbling through the shadows, of trying to find his way in a world that no longer made sense.

But then, through the silence, he heard it—a sound so soft, so faint, that at first, he thought it was just the wind. But it came again, more distinct this time, a footstep crunching in the snow behind him.

His heart stopped, his breath catching in his throat. He turned slowly, afraid to look, afraid to hope. And then he saw you.

You were standing just a few feet away, your figure half-hidden by the falling snow, your eyes wide with shock and something else—something that mirrored the grief and yearning that had been eating away at him for so long.

For a moment, he couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. His mind struggled to process what he was seeing, to reconcile the image of you standing before him with the brutal reality he had been living in. It couldn’t be real. You were gone. You were a ghost.

“Sebastian,” you whispered, your voice trembling as if you, too, were afraid that this was just a dream, that you might wake up at any moment and find yourself alone again.

He shook his head, his eyes wide with disbelief. “You’re not real,” he said, his voice breaking as he took a step back, his hands trembling at his sides. “You can’t be real.”

“Sebastian, it’s me,” you insisted, your voice thick with emotion as you took a step toward him, your hand reaching out as if to reassure him, to prove that you were real, that you were here.

He flinched, his heart pounding in his chest as he stared at you, his mind screaming that this couldn’t be happening, that you were just a figment of his imagination, conjured by his grief and longing. “You’re dead,” he whispered, his voice raw with the pain that had been festering inside him for months. “They told me you were dead.”

“I almost was,” you admitted, your voice barely more than a breath. “I was hurt, Sebastian—badly. But I survived. I made it to one of the camps, and they healed me. After that, I helped wherever I could—healing, rebuilding, trying to make sense of everything that had happened. But my work there was done, I had nothing keeping me there. I had to find you.”

He stared at you, his heart breaking all over again at the sight of the tears in your eyes, the grief and love that shone in them. “I thought I’d lost you,” he whispered, his voice trembling with the weight of his emotions. “I thought you were gone, and I didn’t know how to keep going without you.”

You took another step closer, your hand brushing against his arm, warm and solid and so achingly real. “I’m here now,” you whispered, your voice filled with a quiet, unshakable determination. “We’re both here, Sebastian. We survived.”

He swallowed hard, his throat tight with the tears he had been holding back for so long. “It should’ve been me,” he choked out, the words slipping out before he could stop them. “You didn’t deserve this. You didn’t deserve to suffer like that. I should’ve been the one to die, not you.”

“No,” you said firmly, your voice laced with a fierce, desperate kind of love. “Don’t you ever say that, Sebastian. We both fought, we both survived. And now we’re here. Alive.”

He hesitated, his heart warring with his mind, his grief and guilt battling against the overwhelming relief of having you in his arms again. “I thought I’d lost you,” he repeated, his voice breaking as he finally let himself believe what he was seeing, let himself believe that you were really here, that this wasn’t just a cruel trick of his imagination.

You reached up, your hand cupping his cheek, your touch grounding him, anchoring him in the reality of the moment. “I’m right here,” you whispered, your voice trembling with the depth of your emotions. “And I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving you, Sebastian. Not now. Not ever.”

He couldn’t hold back any longer. With a broken sob, he pulled you into his arms, holding you as tightly as he could, as if he could somehow make up for all the lost time, for all the moments he had thought he would never have with you again. You clung to him just as fiercely, your tears soaking into his shirt as you buried your face in his chest, your breath coming in ragged gasps as you tried to steady yourself.

“I love you,” he whispered, the words spilling out of him in a rush, as if he had been holding them back for too long. “I love you. I should have told you before, but I was too scared, too afraid of what might happen. But I’m not going to make that mistake again.”

“I love you too,” you whispered, your voice trembling with the weight of the words. “I always have, Sebastian. And I’m not going to let you go. Not now. Not ever.”

He kissed you then, slow and deep, pouring all of his love, all of his grief, all of his yearning into that one kiss. It was a kiss filled with the promise of tomorrow, with the hope of a future that he had thought was lost. And as he held you in his arms, surrounded by the ruins of Feldcroft, the wind swirling around you like a shroud, he knew that he had found you again.

And that was enough.

***

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed. Requests are open.

[dom1re]

Gerald was the easiest to draw the most popular choice so here ya gooo

[just-another-star-47]

I feel like Hogwarts Legacy has done a much better job in creating characters fitting into their houses. 😅

I know in the Harry Potter books it's about 'actions are more important than just character traits, but it feels weird, when Harry for example is very much a Gryffindor at his core in the first place - like he didn't really need to go against his traits at all. 😅

When it comes to the houses I always ask myself what the character would do in a stressful situation - I think that's always a good indicator of where they belong.

As Harry dreams about Sirius beeing tortured by Voldemort, his first reaction is to attack, to get into action, to find him, fight everone who stands in his way and done - simple, reckless, a little stupid Gryffindor logic.

Hermione on the other side (I know she's technically a Gryffindor, but that's the point right? In my mind she would have been better off in Ravenclaw), thinks in that exact same situation. She wants to make sure it's not a trap, thinks about the dangers that will await them and tries to prepare herself and the others for it.

I feel in Hogwarts Legacy it's much more clear.

Natsai is very adventurous, her first reaction to Rookwood and Harlow is to fight them. She throws herself in dangerous situations and just wings it from there on.

Garreth doesn't care what others think of him and just does his thing. Could his potions be dangerous to him or other students? Very much so. Does he care? Not at all.

I had my problems with Leander, but I really like now that they put him into Gryffindor because I think he shows the bad sides of the traits of his house very well. He's highly competitive (I think competitive and ambitious are different things) to a point were he becomes arrogant and annoying. He wants to fight and learn dangerous spells, to a point were he's rude to a professor. I don't think he's a coward, he's just not able to let actions follow his big words.

Amit loves knowledge just because of knowledge itself. He is easily fascinated by other cultures and probably everything around him and tries to understand it. He wants to know the 'how' and 'why' and is very creative when it comes to problem solving.

Poppy is brave, but always because of a reason, not for the adventure itself. She wants to protect and has a very soft spot for the weaker ones. If problems arise, she'll ask for help and has overall a very caring personality.

Ominis first reaction, when he catches MC leaving the Undercroft is to threaten her with his status and connections. A behaviour caused by the stress of feeling betrayed and a clear indicator of his house. 😅

And do we even have to talk about Sebastian? 😅 If there's a problem, his first reaction is to charm, to manipulate, to taunt and to gather information so that it's more likely he succeeds.

[freedomfireflies]

How long has it been sunce they broke up when this starts taking place

About 5 months I'm thinking! So not terribly long, but long enough for it to feel like it was a really long time!

[slytherinsprincesss]

*MC and Sebastian trying to sneak up on Ranrok Loyalist and find they’re path blocked*

Sebastian: Bombarda

Mc: Sebastian… we were trying to SNEAK up on the enemy.

Sebastian: Shit, you’re right. Well let’s hope they didn’t notice.

Mc: It was a big explosion, how could they not notice?!

[m00neroni]

are we sure that remus and sirius wouldn't name their daughter poppy or minerva at least as her second name?

[rewritingcanon]

forgot to add but i did a hogwarts legacy uquiz some time ago he he har har

[ccelicaa]

As I certified lesbian, I'm swooned.

I THINK THERE WAS ANOTHER PART TO UR ASK (hopefully i’m sorry if there isnt) but i’m glad Seolhee’s catching all the ladies rn….😎

I know this isn’t really asking anything, but i’m just gonna yap and say I think Seolhee swings both ways LOL I can def see her being with Poppy, or thinking she’s just a little cute🤏🤏