#had to unfollow and block someone who did that a while ago

[whumperofworlds]

TW, suicide mention and vent.

(If you make gifs of actual, IRL people killing themselves and post them for all to see, you lose all my respect and you will be blocked hard. End of subject.)

[ghostofhyuck]

NCT Dream when someone won't stop sending you messages.

AN: Just an unexpected prompt because a former classmate of mine won't stop sending me messages! (Weirdo) 

Mark Lee

Mark knows about that guy who you met at your internship. He won't stop chatting you in your social media that you started worrying. "Just mute him," Mark said because he knows that it's hard for you to block and unfollow people who you used to be close with him. You only follow your boyfriend's order and mutes the guy's account on your social media. "If he chats you again, just tell me." Mark said one last time. 

Huang Renjun

It's frustrating because you already ignored him on your Instagram, now he's on your Twitter dm. You couldn't help but to let out a frustrated sigh because why can't guys take a fucking hint!? But in a split second, Renjun grabs your phone and you weren't able to stop him from chatting a long-ass message to the guy, telling him to fuck off because he's being a creep, and then presses send. "Don't worry, I put my name below, he should know that you're taken."

Lee Jeno

You only stared at your phone. You don't know what to do when your former classmate sent you another message. He's weird for pressing likes on your ig stories and now, he creepily sent you a "hi." You know that he has some hidden intentions, that's why suddenly, Jeno grabs your phone and sees what you've been staring at. "Jeno ---" "Blocked him for you," your boyfriend said, returning your phone to you. "You shouldn't let people make you uncomfortable." 

Lee Donghyuck

"What's his name?" Haechan asked when you told him that your former friend sent you a message once again. You stared at your boyfriend but it seems like he was serious about sending the guy a message since you told him that you're starting to feel uncomfortable with the unsolicited messages. You told him the guy's name and you watch Haechan type on his phone with a serious look. Minutes after, he looks at you and gently smiles, "That'll stop him."

Na Jaemin

You opened your concern to Jaemin when you found out that you had a missed call from your former classmate. It used to be just him sending you a message and no matter how many times you ignore his messages, he would still send you messages. You were in the middle of your rant when you heard your phone's ringtone. Jaemin only smiled at you, asking for your phone in which you gave without any hesitations. "Don't worry princess, I got you." Jaemin said before his expression turned into a serious one. 

Zhong Chenle

"Let me see," Chenle looks at the chatbox. It contains nothing but tons of message from that guy you met at a bar, and that was years ago! You were surprised when he started spamming you with messages. "What's his number?" he asked and you only looked at your boyfriend. "Come on, he won't stop unless someone told him to fuck off," you were convinced, giving him the guy's number, and you watch as Chenle let out string of curses at the guy, telling him to stay away from you. 

Park Jisung

First, you can't block him because he's a former classmate of yours. Your other classmates will know that you did it and you don't want to cause any drama. Even though you ignored him numerous times, he still won't stop chatting you, even sending you a text message as if he was desperate. Jisung had enough of it, he grabs your phone, blocks him on your phone and returns your phone to you. "If he chats you one more time, I'll expose him if that means shutting him up." your boyfriend said while wearing his sweetest smile. 

[suzyandthefox]

Clarification, Apologies,A word for the community, and Blog Updates..

On 31st of July, around a week ago, A situation involving some users, myself included, happened, causing me to go on a temporary hiatus for a week, as it was handled indelicately and caused a lot of harm to users who never asked to be a part of it.

For the sake of privacy and not stirring the pot again, I will not name any of the users.

I should clarify that English is not my first language, so there might be grammatical mistakes in this.

TLDR: I was careless and I reblogged from NSFW blogs not knowing they were NSFW blogs, causing harassment to other members of the community. I have deleted these reblogs and I decided to not reblog anything on this blog for the safety of everyone.

Elaboration under break:

It started when an user, who I will not name, made a callout post about me. They screenshotted reblogs I made, and while I still believe that that user fully intended to cause drama instead of addressing any real issue, they were right in calling my mistakes out.

Throughout several months, I have reblogged from NSFW accs, even though I have a bold NSFW DNI on the top of my blog. I have also reblogged from an MDNI account multiple times despite having minors on my blog, endangering both parties.

I have since blocked these accounts and deleted these reblogs. However,that doesn't undo the damage I already did.

I know I have problems with many social skills, like social cues and etiquette. I do have Autism and ADHD after all. This led to, when I was reblogging things that I found cool, me accidentally missing many of the signs that most would have seen. I didn't realize what was happening until someone told me.

At the moment of the discourse, this blog had 194 followers (202 as I write this). In any other social media platform, this number means you're basically invisible, and so that's the logic I went with. I thought nobody saw this blog so I was lenient with my content, treating this blog as my personal shitposting place.

However, after this discourse,I realized that I am being seen on Tumblr. That unfortunately was at the cost of accidentally hurting innocent users who never asked to be a part of this, along with ruining my mental health for a while.

There have been kind hearted users who defended me, and users who told me that I am being looked up to and that I am a well respected member of the community, which is something I will remember for the rest of my life.

What I am trying to say is, I fucked up. Badly. Yet despite that, the community has given me a second chance, proven by the fact that I wasn't blocked or unfollowed (Quite the opposite actually)

I now understand the responsibility that I have and that I need to be very careful with what I post, especially since I have made the choice to let minors interact with this blog. I now understand I must look after them because of that.

I apologize so much for everyone that has been hurt by this. I won't ask for forgiveness. I only ask that everyone knows that I have acknowledged my mistakes and I promise to better myself in the future.

I am a human and I make mistakes, please don't ever be afraid to tell me when I do something wrong. (Tell me, by messaging or commenting. Please not by making a call out post on me, since this has proven to hurt more than help others.)

I made this blog to be a safe place to enjoy a certain trope without getting hurt, and I want to live up to that. For the safety of everyone, me included, I will make some changes to this blog.

Changes:

1: No more reblogs

This blog was handled indelicately, and unprofessionally, and I decided that I will change that, I will make this blog into an Art/Writing blog first and foremost, With prompt posts being a second priority.

The only exception to this will be fanworks or fanfics or things that are directly made for me/things I am mentioned in, I will tag them accordingly depending on content.

2: This blog is now +16

Yes, I interacted with users younger than 16 before, Yes,I have followers who are less than 16. I have thought about it deeply and I realized that for the sake of not hurting anyone, and if I wanted to be more comfortable around this blog, then I need to keep people who are slightly closer to my age range, Instead of censoring myself,

that's because I have taken a liking to (Nonsexual) fatal vore and gore, I want to make similar content in the future, as well as other darker topics.

I will not block anyone who is younger than 16, but I will not directly interact with you anymore, even if I'm not responsible for your actions, it's just to be safe.

Now I need to make some things clear:

I am not a minor so I can interact with MDNI blogs and they can interact if they wish to. As long as they're SFW

But, again, I will not reblog from them for the safety of those who are minors following my blog.

Vore is nonsexual for me and I don't want my work to be sexualised, especially because I depict myself in it.

I have absolutely nothing against people who are into it sexually, I just don't want my work in these circles.

I can't control how my work is perceived and where it goes, however my blog is SFW (In the sense that there's nothing graphic or sexual on it), meant for people who are also interested in that content, and so I don't want to see people who think it's “hot” here.

I am not responsible for anyone's actions on this blog, I am not responsible for people who find my content weird or sexual or whatever,I am not responsible for the minors on this blog, I am not responsible for my mutuals, I am only responsible for my own actions.

This community has been extremely supportive of me, and there have been people who comforted me during this whole situation, without them I probably would've deleted my blog from sheer panic.

I owe these people my life, thank you so much for being on my side.

I hope that one day, my blog can be a source of comfort too.

Thank you for reading and I hope you guys have a wonderful day!

[lovely-cherubs]

Sometimes whenever I go on Twitter, I feel like the Hunter x Hunter fandom is slowly becoming a bit like the Genshin fandom and it scares me.

A couple months ago, I saw this post and me being someone who has opinions like everyone else, I replied.

I said "Kurapika isn't trans. Togashi has confirmed several times he's a male." And for some reason, that prompted some (not all) people to jump straight to the conclusion that I am homophobic and/or transphobic for saying that. Not only did that happen, but two people that I used to follow on the app blocked me over this and called me the same thing(s) as well. Not only that, but they didn't even let me explain myself and blocked me before I could even do so.

Because they had already blocked me, I didn’t see it when they say things like "oh she had to coming" and "she knew it would happen", etc. behind my back. I only knew about this because one of my friend who follows them was able to see their posts and told me about it.

So lemme just say this and make it very clear: I am someone who sees Kurapika as cisgender and straight. I personally see him being attracted to the opposite sex and identifing as a male. While I understand why some may think and speculate that he's transgender, non binary, etc. due to his androgynous appearance, it doesn't mean that he's genderqueer to me as there are plenty of cisgender people out there that are androgynous. Androgynous ≠ genderqueer.

It's one thing to disagree with my opinion/headcanon. It's another to call me homophobic and/or transphobic and then proceeded to block me afterwards just because you didn’t agree with it. So I just want to say that if you're someone who finds this "opinion/headcanon" of mine to be a problem, please kindly unfollow/block me because I have no room for this type of behavior nor do I have the patience to put up with this kind of shit.

It's OK if you disagree with me, but if you know that you’re going to be disrespectful about it, simply unfollow and/or block me and go on about your day. Thank you.

~ lovely-cherubs

[ben-marco]

so glad i blocked leigon and many but one a while ago simply because they did things that i personally found weird (although many but one did say on tumblr that they "didnt care" about legion proudly claiming to be a radfem.. so. idk)

i feel like the amount of slideshows and stuff of them graphically describing things that happened during the abuse they both faced was a bit odd, i mean they had TW / CWs but still. i found myself going back to those slideshows continuously to try and trigger something because, guess what, it did trigger things, and im so desperate for that smoking gun of proof that i'll do anything. which in hindsight just feels dangerous. i dont trust either of them to be good people, especially since on many but one's tumblr they just spouted slurs they couldnt reclaim in response to someone saying that a term they used is derogatory (and they defended that by saying "[alter] was using it to describe herself" which doesn't erase the meaning behind the term..)

leigon posts vents a lot without any trigger warnings, and blocks / unfollows people at random for simply disagreeing with them. ive heard that they also tend to get their followers on people's asses if they talk about how leigon spreads misinfo!

as someone with npd i used to just dismiss it by saying "oh they have npd i get it" but no... what is even going on at this point. their whole alpha to omega document is just full of misinfo (mainly the fact that not all programming types use greek letter names, i think they just pulled that out of their ass to make the document "aesthetic"), which is sad because it is really well written.

Thank you so much for bringing this up, anon. I always thought those posts were really strange, too.

When people post extremely detailed, graphic/triggering things like that, it makes me wonder what their motive is. What do they expect from those posts and from people's responses to them? What are they looking for? I've known people who post things like that and all of them have either been bad actors or people who are so unstable that they really should be working on basic stabilization before they delve into these spaces to begin with.

Posting things like that is so, so, so dangerous too. For the poster and for people seeing it. I think a lot of people are drawn to return to that kind of content to see if it triggers them-- and guess what, that content is triggering and upsetting to most sane people, survivors or not. Most people are going to be upset by, or triggered by, graphic discussions of OEA and surrounding topics.

I just...don't think those kinds of graphic posts benefit anyone. You're putting that information out there about your abuse/trauma for god knows who to see (and in Legion's case, attaching your face to it too), potentially putting yourself in danger, and for what? So someone else can see it and be triggered by it?

I said earlier that I've only ever seen this kind of behavior in people who are bad actors or just very destabilized. And honestly I feel like Legion is a bad actor at this point, especially due to their defensiveness and their willingness to weaponize their followers against anyone who disagrees with them, as you mentioned. Their transphobia and participation in radfem circles is certainly a huge problem but it's not the only issue with them or their behavior.

I don't really know anything about Many But One other than that they associate with Legion, so I appreciate you mentioning those things about them.

[antiendovents]

[this is very much a rent, my apologies]

I hope it's okay for me to discuss this here, but we've been pro-endo for a very long time, ever since we realized we had PF-DID about four years ago... but the longer we stay in that community, the more we've been hurt and I personally think we desprately need to escape it. But so many other alters in our system are terrified of being "horrible people" if we start interacting with anti-endos, due to the trauma we went though when we were younger, and I'm completely stumped on what to do.

Our abusive ex is also well known in the pro-endo community, and that's causing us significant harm and stress. But no matter what we do to get away, someone always backpeddles and I'm really stressed out at this point. Some of us even still try to talk with our ex and it's just... horrific. Our host believes that if we become a "sysmed" then we're a horrible person who's harming others, despite the fact that we're constantly being harmed and mocked while in the endogenic community. It feels like there's no escape and I have no idea what to do

this is complicated, but its not bad to be anti-endo. you are not harming anyone by simply believing in the actual science of DID/OSDD. i'd recommend attempting to slowly leave pro-endo spaces (unfollowing some people / blocking them) and attempting to just quietly back out i guess? it will be easier to think for yourself when you're not surrounded by those people. once you think you're ready i'd also recommend trying to join some anti-endo spaces, most of them that we've found have been pretty accepting and supportive to past pro-endos (sorry if this doesn't make much sense, i'm not from the subsystem that runs this account but i wanted to answer this anyways)

[naniskys]

thanks for the tag @sollucets i loved reading ur answers !!! 🫶🫶 i've been a little ia lately + busy with irl things but i'm slowly trying to work through the backlog of tag games 😅

1. why did you choose your url?

it's from the french words "la monnaie," which basically means small change. i found the word amusing when i first learnt it a while ago and i've been using it as a username practically everywhere ever since :]

2. any sideblogs? name them and why you have them

technically no? i set up the ao3 feed for the dangerous romance tag on a sideblog pretty much just for my own convenience, but that doesn't rlly count lol

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

i've been lurking on tumblr since ~2015, when you could actually use the website pretty functionally even without an account, but i only made this account in 2020.

4. do you have a queue tag?

i do! it's just "q" (although it's empty right now because i haven't been on much 😩😩)

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

i finally made a tumblr account after 5 yrs of lurking because of this one niche movie that had somewhat of a fandom on here and i wanted to interact lol

6. why did you choose your icon?

because fairy lights !! they're pretty :))

(i use this icon everywhere as well as my url, i think i've only ever changed it once on here)

7. why did you choose your header?

i had to go back and check my blog because i genuinely didn't remember what my header was 😭😭 but it's just a cute gif off of google that i picked coz i liked it :)

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

apparently this post about akkayan and raysand??? guess that answers the shitposts question as well LMAO

9. how many mutuals do you have?

quite a few !! is there any way of actually finding out the number? i have no clue, but if someone follows me i tend to check out their blog and if we have similar interests i'll follow back :] that being said, probably around 30-ish who i've actually interacted with beyond mutual liking and rbing hehe

10. how many followers do you have?

382!

11. how many people do you follow?

486 - definitely need to do a clean out tho because i follow a lot of random blogs from interests long gone by

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

yes lol

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

it depends honestly, sometimes several times a day for several hours (😭), other times i'll go a day or two without opening it <//3

14. have you had a fight/argument with another blog?

nah, if i don't agree with something i'll just unfollow and/or block

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?

very unnecessary, i get that there's good intention behind it but it's honestly just annoying to see and will actively make me not reblog it 😭 (or at the very least i'll go back and rb a version without the addition)

16. do you like tag games?

HELL YEAH, i love yapping about things 🥰🥰

17. do you like ask games?

yesss they're so much fun !!!! (that being said, my askbox is so wonky that it never saves my posts as i'm writing and then it'll randomly crash and i just the ask altogether????)

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

hmm i have no concept of tumblr famousness but just looking through my moots there's quite a few who i feel are pretty well known???

that being said, gonna give a shoutout to dee @distant-screaming who is the most famous person ever to me because i love love love their fics so much 😭😭😭 like have i ever fully watched nlmg? nope. do i still constantly go back and read her palmnueng fics? absolutely.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

no i wouldn't say so :) i admire a lot of people on here and i love all my mutuals <33 (but in a platonic way hehe)

20. tags?

i feel like people have done this already (so no pressure + pls tag me in ur post if u've already done it !!) but tagging @dramalets @distant-screaming @winnysatang @hellswolfie @blackstar-gazer <33

[creaturefeaster]

new day new morning post

Currently 06:55 PST as I begin this post.

Does anyone else listen to The Cure? They're touring this year overseas, the last time they did was 8 years ago. I'm going in June to see them live, and I'm very excited. When buying tickets with my husband, I remarked that a The Cure concert is probably one of the only places I could be where people wouldn't stare at me (my fashion is what I'd call dark and loud)-- something I found funny.

On top of this, I was asked if I wanted to get a tattoo for my birthday. I have been considering a tattoo for a while now, though I've been on the fence because the idea of putting something permanent on my body is a hard hurdle to get over in my brain. Or moreso, I'd just want to make sure it isn't something I would regret down the line. I'm considering imagery of things I've always loved; Cow skulls, roses & thorns, eyes, a few things that cross my mind that are also pretty safe and hard to get wrong on a tattoo.

Maybe I'll find someone to help design a tattoo for me. That'd be fun. But also perhaps difficult when there's only a couple of weeks left until my birthday. Much to think about.

Speaking of much to think about, I succumbed to one of my usual dreams of dire last night. I have always been a nightmare dreamer, usually about zombie invasions, or an indescribable entity that kills the population in swathes. Tonight though, it was a dream about someone who was considered to be so perfect (for reasons I don't know. the guy was kind of a dick imo), that there was a mad chase to both capture this guy, and also keep him safe from harm.

My dream ended sort of abruptly near the end. I don't remember much about the details of the dream, other than that it was a lot of sneaking around in the dark. One of the ending scenes though was someone attacking this 'perfect guy,' completely severing his hand and pulling his arm so harshly you could see it hanging from the ligaments that attached it to his shoulder.

People in my group, that I was apparently in, flipped the fuck out and decided the only way to balance justice in this situation was to axe the attacker right in the forehead. The gore was excessive!

I'm not sure why this dream was so brutal and graphic. But I have awoken quickly because of it, meaning I can start my day early and more awake. I'll take it.

...

RE: To follow up with my little grumbles in my last morning post, nobody is harassing me. That hasn't happened in years. It's moreso an influx of people either messaging me and begging me to come back, or people messaging me asking if they can have my ask blogs. Both insensitive considering that I feel I've been pretty clear on my stances with the blog & fandom. But also everyone gives the fandom too much credit for making me pull away from the show. One of the biggest things for me was some of the more recent stuff they had in the show that made me feel so sickened, I just couldn't enjoy it anymore.

I've considered recently just unfollowing people who post about the show on the regular, or even blocking some, because tumblr reallllly likes to recommend me blogs just loaded with SP content still, and it's starting to get on my nerves. That, and the more I think on what happened in the show, the more it makes me uncomfortable to be around people who just pretend it never happened/ignore it.

...

Anyways, this is more than I wanted to say on the subject already. I'm over it for now.

P.S. By the way, I loved reading from you guys how you've all been doing. Some left replies, some sent me asks, some DMed. It's nice to know what people around me have going on :3.

Here's this morning's question: What's the latest dream you can remember having?

[espoopee]

Okay so I'm back

It's been a couple of years since I've decided to actually use Tumblr for any other reason than to look at aesthetic stoners making pretty bowls with their crystal bongs or whatever.

The truth is, I'm once again in a pretty dark place in my life because I just had a 5-year relationship end pretty terribly, and not even of my own fault (objectively!!!). This is pretty much the only place I can talk about it because my ex would see the reactions and emotions I post on other social media and he would, for whatever reason, retaliate by blocking/unfollowing/whatever and just generally punishing me for being open about how I feel.

I'm not good. I feel so beat up and I even just got a new job that I really can't fuck up because it'll spell out the rest of my career for me. I really don't know why, but I really just crave some sort of apology or show of remorse from my ex.

For context, we broke up because... at this point, IDK. My ex said it was because at the time, I had no job and he was tired of opening his wallet for me for dates. Fine, that's totally valid. He wouldn't give me a chance, and I couldn't get a say. Bad. But the thing is, we never talked about this in person. He broke up with me via chat. It's one of the things that I quickly learned I shouldn't take lightly and I have to demand a proper breakup from him, especially since the circumstances weren't even that drastic. He refused, and kept avoiding me. He was kinda scathing to talk to when I could, always bringing up the reason for us breaking up. When I bring up that I no longer care why he broke up with me (since we're no longer together) and that I care more about the way he treats me post-breakup (since we have 5 years of experiences, many of which are good), he freezes and it's so obvious he feels some sort of guilt and he didn't think that far ahead. I just wish I was smarter in taking advantage of that.

It's been almost a month since it happened. At first, I didn't even know we broke up, because he didn't say anything. I had to go look at his twitter bio and see that he removed me without even telling me or warning me, and that's when it actually happened.

I just don't really know how to move forward, since this whole thing was pretty much forced upon me. I get that I have the option to accept it, but the way it happened is obviously gonna affect the way I feel and do things. I didn't get a proper breakup, of course I'm gonna feel some rage. I didn't get closure, so I'm gonna be constantly confused. I didn't even get to say goodbye, so it's gonna take a long while to realize that we're really no longer together, and that any form of reconciling isn't on the table.

I'm just in disbelief that a person can be that callous. How in the world can you leave somebody behind so hurt and confused? He always said he was hurt too, and stressed or whatever. I never really knew what to do with that information, because being hurt and confused doesn't make you immune to responsibility.

I don't even know where to begin when I tell people what happened. I know it's kind of selfish, but I really want someone to have my back when I tell them how much I've been hurt. He had his immature friends bully me during the breakup. It's wild, but I kinda wish I didn't have "mature" friends who think it's best if I just let them be and move on. I guess I'm looking for justice for myself, when no one else would.

If for any reason you Tumblr lovelies are still reading this, be assured that I'm fine, and don't have any plans on offing myself any time soon. I mean, I guess I did two weeks ago, but I was quickly reminded of what a terrible idea that is. I'm trying my best to cope and keep busy, despite my situation being stuck at home for the meantime. I might use Tumblr more often as a sort of journal/diary. The more I talk to my friends, the more I realize they just listen and don't do anything else, so if it's any consolation, I'll just use Tumblr to let ALL my thoughts out, no matter how negative.

[shut-up-rabert]

Irony, You're allowing anons to tag transphobes and terfs of desiblr you interact and you haven't reply to my " @desi-stree being a terf and transphobe and casteist" ask. my bad... You're not gonna do anything ik.

I don't really know what made the anon think of you as terf. Probably because a long time ago I've also seen you and @suvarnarekha talking about jk rowling and her reply was also twisted (in one line she was like jk was wrong and in another she was neutral and in another she was like jk was telling the truth so yea-) I've seen you interact with @desi-stree so it's either you are a terf or your views like always is neutral when it comes to terfs and you'll keep interacting with these kinda shitty mutuals just because they're a part of hindublr. Either way i hope i never see your name on my dash again. I was here for your political views ofc I don't think i need that anymore not from you

Hey, do you think its that easy?

I cannot react without speaking to her, I'm not an internet incel to just go "Oh look at these screenshots IG I'll block her on everything"

I was waiting until I could talk to her but thanks to you and your lovely anon friends who just don't know when to fucking stop, I couldn't. My mutuals and I were getting showered with all of your anonymous love so ofcourse I had to do something about it first :D

Also, there's asks in my box since last year that I have not reacted to yet, so yeah, get in the fucking line.

As of Suvarnrekha, she was talking about different things when she said JK was wrong and when she said she was right. When she said she was right, she was talking about the "biological sex cannot be changed" bit. She did not affirm her transphobia, not even once.

All in all, I'm a terf? Simply because I do not skim through people's entire blogs before speaking to them? What kind of incel does that, anon?

I did not know, not that I did not care, so how about you all take those labels and shove them where the sun won't shine?

Tell me, do you seriously think I had the time to speak to someone while I had the sword of being accused as a castiest, terf, hanging over my head? People form assumptions when they do not immediately get their answers, you yourself are an example.

Honestly, unfollow me if you have not and block me aswell. I cannot deal with such fragile followers who will turn in their judgement while someone else is mentally tired of dealing with unrequired hate .

[electricea]

@tazmilyxfamily sent - 6. excessive ooc! ( RP Talk - Accepting! )

6. Excessive OOC.

I guess for me, excessive would have to be really be really excessive - like for example, early on in my days in the fandom, there was a blog who used to make a lot of really depressing ooc posts - things like 'guess nobody wants me around anymore. goodbye.' and it was almost constant especially towards the end of their blog - at the time, I never unfollowed but the sheer amount of ooc negativity and just the way the posts were phrased, did make me feel uncomfortable.

A few years ago, there was a similar blog - almost every day, they would get anon hate - or they'd make similar posts - posts about how nobody liked them, how everyone would be so much better off without them and along with that, they would IM me a lot like telling me about the anons and there were so many times when I tried to tell them to block the anons, to turn anon off, to just delete them and not answer them - but this person just seemed stuck in this constant cycle of negativity and eventually it did reach a point where I had to unfollow because not only was it just getting to be a lot, having to see and to hear about it, but also no matter how many times I tried to talk to them, they kept answering these anons and making these posts - it was like they found themselves stuck in this non-stop circle of negativity and couldn't pull themselves out.

Also, while I do enjoy joking around and crackposting as much as the next person, if I see nothing but crack posts then after a point, I do consider unfollowing. Yeah, I do it myself - I also love to joke around and just have fun - but I'm also here to write with folks and if that's all I'm seeing from someone, then maybe we're just not compatible. There's nothing wrong with it, it might just be a clash of styles and or personalities, but that's how I feel.

As mentioned above though, for me 'excessive' would have to be every day or every other day - like if I pull up your blog and that's all I'm seeing, then yeah, I might have to consider a quiet unfollow - but a vent post here and there or the odd post joking around? Nothing wrong with that.

[hartz-penny]

idk where to post about this bc i kinda just need a void.

the last month i've been regularly talking to this guy, not just some random match off of hinge / bumble / tinder, but my instagram crush. he was a teacher from relatively close to me who ended up on my explore page and i thought he was really cute. i followed him two years ago, and despite a lil bit of delulu thinking he'd maybe find me cute and we would fall madly in love, i knew it would probably be just a one-sided thing.

couple of years ago, i replied to something he posted, we had a brief convo in DM, but went nowhere. i noticed around this time that he had a wedding ring on in videos so i really began to just erase the hope of any reciprocation.

i always really liked his content (it was all either really positive stuff or "millennial teacher" content) so every so often i'd reply to a story, again getting just a quick "thanks!" or smile back.

then a month ago (quite literally almost to the day), i replied to a story and we started having an actual conversation. then he seemed to start getting flirty, and i quickly checked any and all of his recent videos to see if that wedding ring was still in them, it didn't appear to be there anymore. so i flirted back. and we had a really nice long convo. i went to bed, hoping maybe he would venture into my DMs again.

the next day he did, and the next, and we continued to talk and get to know each other and flirt pretty much every day. he was really funny, we'd send goofy pictures, we'd get a little spicy with our convos.

from my insta snooping and having had followed him for 2 years, i knew he had a kid, and i hoped and assumed he'd bring it up when ready and necessary. he brought it up the 3rd day we were chatting. he was a "full time solo dad of two" (the two surprised me). while i'd spent most of the last year moving towards the "i don't want kids" side, i don't hate kids, we hadn't even gone on a date yet, and he had a lot of really, really great qualities, so despite his "i won't be offended if the kid thing scares you off" i said that it didn't. this did however make planning an eventual date trickier especially since we lived about an hour and a bit away from each other.

but we continued to chat every day, and he was refreshingly honest with me, very forthcoming that although he really liked some of our spicy conversations, he liked just chatting with me and getting to know me. it was so great, i was enjoying conversation in a way thats normally tricky when you've never met them in person, i was so excited to see where this would go, even though i didn't know when that first date would happen.

then this week got a little weird. we chatted as normal monday morning / afternoon, and then monday evening my message stayed at "sent" for way longer than normal, i figured "oh he's probably dealing with kid stuff like the other night", tuesday comes, i send a meme, a goofy picture when i'm at work, it stays at "sent" vs. "seen". i start checking if he unfollowed me and he hadn't, he viewed my story when i posted those, but i was still like "weird, but again, he's probably just busy". finally last night he replied (his kid was sick) and i felt so much better. we sent goofy pictures back and forth, and we ended the convo completely normally.

then this morning, i open insta and i'm on my profile, and i notice my follower count had dropped and it was just one of those "i know" moments. he hadn't just unfollowed me, i was blocked.

literally as recent as sunday he was telling me how he wants to just sit on the couch and watch a reality show that i like with me, that he wants to figure out how we'd tell my parents that he has kids, and then this.

i'm just so confused, and so hurt, and i once again feel like i will always be the one duped by guys, even when its someone who on paper, very much doesn't seem like the type.

[notasimpleslater]

So someone on Lipstick Alley actually confirmed that Ethan was the one who blocked Ariana back in April (I guess based on the fact that his likes were still showing up on her pictures but hers weren’t showing up on his), he apparently had been following her brother and his partner but unfollowed them around the same time. It was apparently also reported that Ariana spent her birthday with Ethan (and another unnamed woman) but I have no idea if that’s been verified or not. Just some more random evidence I found 🤷

Hmm, interesting. I've seen many people theorize why the block/unblock thing happened, but your guess is as good as mine on that front. Maybe Ethan was having second thoughts about this relationship? I've seen some people say it was to cover up an affair, but I don't see how blocking Ariana on instagram would help that.

Oh, did he really follow Frankie at one point? That must have been a while ago because I don't remember that. I just know that he was on Frankie's SpongeBob podcast last year.

That's interesting about them spending Ariana's birthday together. Throughout this year I've seen a few reports of Ariana being seen in public with an "unnamed man and woman," and I've assumed it might be Ethan and Lilly.

[fae-of-prey]

so a few days ago i mistakenly accused another writer on here of plagiarizing my work. i now know that it was a misunderstanding + in hindsight what i said here was uncalled for:

someone just copied an au concept that my literal heart & soul has been in for a very long time + i was even super secretive about it but they still stole what little i had posted about it before i could even release my actual original au. + they have a track record of ripping off many others work too. it's honestly fucking pathetic that they were too cowardly to even run it by the people they completely ripped off if they were going to take so much 'inspo'

i apologized to them for those things privately + i’m still sorry for my harsh words. i don’t want to spread hate or misinfo so i’m just going to explain what happened: 

i have been working on an au that is v dear to me for a while now, i have posted some concepts about it publicly but i told 3 moots about this au in detail. the other day one of these moots brought another writers new au post to my attention bc there was an alarming amount of similarities. at first i thought it was a coincidence, but then after talking with the other moots i had already told about my au, we believed that it was not a coincidence + indeed ripping off what little i had posted of my au. this is bc (1) it was almost identical to mine that everyone who i had told about this immediately clocked it but also (2) bc this writer has been ripping off other writers for a while now. i sent this writer the following message: “hey i wanted to talk to you bc i saw your new au post, it's really similar to an au that i’ve been working on forever + i've also noticed way too many similarities in it to things that i have posted about my au” i waited for 4 hours for a response but instead of talking to me they simply unfollowed me, so i blocked them bc i figured that meant there was nothing else to say if they were just going to ignore me instead of talking to me when they had clearly seen my message. i was also messaging with the 3 moots (the ones who knew about my au) as all this was happening who also agreed that the writer doing this instead of just talking to me was extremely suspicious + def made it seem like they were trying to get away with ripping me off. later i saw that the writer posted about this situation showing that their au was not ripping off my work, it took a minute for me to understand that but i do now recognize that this specific instance was a misunderstanding. i just wish this writer had talked about this to me first instead of ignoring me about it + proceeding to handle it the way that they did. i also wish this writer didn’t plagiarize anyone but i can’t control others, i can only control my own actions / reactions.

so just to be clear: i am truly sorry for my harsh words, it was uncalled for + it did not help the situation it only made it worse, i was also incorrect about them ripping me off specifically. but i’m not sorry for accusing this writer of plagiarism bc even though they didn’t do it to me they have done it to many others, this didn’t just come out of nowhere.

also this should go without saying but please do not send any negativity of any kind or start shit with anyone who you think i might be talking about here, even if you guess correctly that is not the point of this post bc it’s just unproductive + i also don’t wish that upon anyone whether its on my behalf or not. this post is simply meant to clarify what happened, i thought i owed everyone an explanation since i did turn out to be mistaken in this case.

[wat3rm370n]

The same problems continue no matter the platform.

Is it a fresh start for you and me, or for engagement clout chasing influencers making money off our attention?

Big time influencers and famous people who know how to build up a following, are now using tried and true things like engagement farming questions. Examples are asking the audience to recommend their favourite recipe or a good movie to watch on streaming, or a book to read. It’s funny to see long-time twitter hotshots reverting to these tricks starting out on bluesky.

I’m seeing a lot more people starting to point out, like I did last month, that the block lists circulating for Bluesky are questionable. If Bluesky is a decent platform that’s being managed well, you shouldn’t need to pre-block anyone like you did on Twitter to avoid being bombarded by it. All you should need to do is not follow, and unfollow anyone who’s reposting garbage stuff. And save the block button for nuisances who are deliberately trolling.

The other day something disappointing happened on Bluesky and I haven’t even been using it that much, though I’ve had the account for almost a year maybe. I was following someone on social media for years who posted a lot of nature content. And when they moved to Bluesky, then I followed them on Bluesky only to find the other day they were reposting “clever” posts by the author hotshot guy who a few years ago sent his alt-right fans after me. This famous guy posted a screenshot of some post of mine and held me up as an example of A Bad Person Online for criticizing a big shot famous person with a big following and hobnobbing with all the fancy people. I criticized a comment he made for its seemingly thoughtless disregard for disabled and high risk people. It’s apparently worse to criticize someone than for someone to be thoughtlessly cruel. So this guy’s alt-right type followers were for weeks telling me to commit suicide, saying gross things to me in DMs, and even harassing unwitting followers of mine, and I didn’t even know why at first, someone had to inform me of what had happened and why I was suddenly getting the mass trolling. This fancy author also accused me of “silencing” this bigshot scientist off of twitter, despite his huge platform, by merely voicing my concerns, as someone with no such platform. At least one woman with a huge platform backed him up too, even though she surely knew about the sexist harassment I was enduring because of all this. It was very disappointing. The thing is, this guy on bluesky who I was probably retweeting back on twitter, was probably also retweeting that horrid person who did that to me all the while, and I just didn’t know all that time because I had that author guy blocked. So here I was reposting content from someone who was boosting this gross guy, a published author with a huge following, who’d sent his legions of fans, mostly alt-right new atheist covid contrarian types, to come after me.

My point is that all the influencers, as well as the toxic people on twitter are moving over to bluesky because that’s where their targets are after all. They have other places where they congregate for their cozy community, and it’s not the open social media. Community activism doesn’t happen on the open unmoderated or lightly moderated anonymous social media with people prioritizing likes and subscribes and followers and attention farming. And posting online is not activism. Don’t rely on parasocial relationships with big shots. And it’s true that smaller groups in more moderated spaces are going to be more conducive to making friends – or plans. There’s a reason people form and like small chat groups. And also a reason why larger groups and forums need to have enforced rules.

Maybe over the past couple years if you’ve been on bluesky, it seemed like a more closed system. And nice in comparison to twitter because twitter is a total shitshow and everyone was boiled slowly like the apocryphal frog in the pot, so many people still don’t realize how bad it’s gotten. And bluesky at least has some moderation - and more importantly up until recently it was inhabited by primarily early adopters for a period of time, which creates a certain self selection of people. But it’s not going to be better just because. All the problems are migrating there, and the bots and sock puppets and troll farms will soon be in full operation there as well. The only benefit is that hopefully they won’t close down access to the data so that infosec researchers have access to it to analyse it and people who are interested will be able to find out.

There is no safe open social media platform, and arguably nothing that’s truly safe online. People follow "popular" gross violent people all the damn time - many times because they have no idea about many of the bad things because the app only shows people what they want to see and avoids showing people stuff that would make them disengage and close out.

All these platforms are all manipulated, internally and externally in some way. And they all seem to tend to be a diversion from better things because a large inherent priority is keeping people on the platform.

I realize people use them as a way to connect and advertise, and that makes sense, my point isn’t that everyone should just give up on social media and that everyone needs to go back to privately hosted blogs or bare bones email lists and RSS readers. The point is to know how these platforms go wrong, and avoid the pitfalls, and avoid letting any app become a pointless time sink. Though I do know people with full lives who’ve never had any accounts on any social media, so that is an option for many. Also, why not start a newsletter or blog of your own if you might have something important or interesting to communicate? You might be surprised that there are people interested.

I receive some interesting email replies and comments to my substack post emails. And at least when I see these emails in my inbox, I know it’s likely not just gonna be about sick burns for an audience, because it’s an email to me — so it’s typically someone genuinely interested in telling me about something, or asking about something, or at least just sounding off.

There’s going to be a lot to sound off about when even more of the information landscape is taken over by scammy crypto stuff and AI generated garbage.

I suggest writing to elected reps to complain about it first, before posting to social media. But maybe we’ll still see you on the next geocities.

(crossposted from my substack)

[mizakikimoto]

I believe in fun, but I hate questions like this. I hate this trendy thing with ranking everything, and giving everything a score. I'm sick of how people are seen as wrong for having their own experience, liking or disliking or feeling however they do about anything.

I don't get to do much of anything, but I miss being able to go into things blind. I miss not being forced to look at reviews and opinions when I do a search of something I'm interested in or know I like when I go online.

And conversations about entertainment, art have been online for as long as I'VE been online. But I never avoided them like I do now.

I've been having a…crisis(?) with the Internet this year. It's changed so much, and my motivation to get on here is going. I kind of hate getting on every website, but I would miss out on so much if I completely abandoned this space. I can't not check my email, and even THAT used to be fun.

….

I wrote this last month. I didn't share it maybe because I just…I don't know. Sharing myself into the digital space just doesn't do as much for me anymore. Part of that is personal...I have nothing new to share. The other part is...not liking these websites anymore. But…I will share this:

Earlier this year I made a deal with myself to be more social on here. NOT ignore random messages of people, to vote on people's stories, all that. I regret it so much 😄

All this year I just keep thinking: I don't know how to navigate this app anymore, or the "social Internet".

Because, like…

I used to be very, very active on Flickr. It was just cool seeing the world, seeing people's lives. It made the world so big to me. And when Instagram started it was advertised as a PHOTO app. Flickr became a paid thing so I was like…this is my new Flickr. This is where I'll go now.

But Instagram…has changed a lot. Even when you look at the "profile song" thing…this is more like Myspace now. A follower here is much different than a follower on Flickr.

But, at the same time, some people use this to promote art, illustration, music, movies, and everything else. They'll have that little tag on their profile: "musician", "filmmaker", "actor", fashion designer". But their page is also a personal page.

There's this filmmaker I follow on YouTube. He uses like a Fujifilm, and I found him after doing some research on video cameras, right? So a few months ago he posted a video on YouTube after a long time. I went on his profile to see if he had an Instagram. So…he did. But when I logged on I couldn't find his profile. So…my best guess is that I already followed him, and he blocked me. My feelings were hurt…I'm not gonna lie. And like…I barely interacted with his page. I might have liked some things to show support when he posted about a new short, but that was it.

Like…what the heck? You don't block people on Flickr. But this isn't "Flickr"…not anymore.

I mean…on the same hand: I used to follow this guy on here, from Chicago, who posted comedy and stuff. Comedy. That sort of thing. But then that went away and was replaced by like…hoodrat stuff. Let's keep it at that. So I unfollowed him.

Like…what is this app?

And there are people in my "story rotation". They'll have thousands of followers and I'm like "this isn't creepy", y'know…me viewing all their stories. But I realize that a lot of those are ghost/"dead" followers. Some people have probably paid for followers. I'm probably one of the few, or maybe the only person viewing their stories 😄. I noticed this because I'd view people's stories, people who don't follow me back. But somehow they'll view my story back and it's like…you have thousands of followers. How do you keep noticing my views? Oooooh.

And this is the inspiration for this post right now. Someone messaged me on here like "Who are you?" 😄 Like…sorry for viewing your stories.

But I've been thinking about this for a while even before this. I have been slowly unfollowing people. I haven't been posting as much.

And this is only a big deal because, like…I've been "a part" of the Internet for so long. And back then…there weren't view counts. Likes, acknowledgements, comments were a thing, kind of…but they were never expected. And it wasn't an addiction.

But…I feel "abandoned" by the current internet. Irrelevant.

Twitter sucked long before Elon Musk bought it. I haven't posted directly on Facebook in maybe years. Tumblr…I'm trying to get back into it, but the "community" isn't as strong as it was. YouTube is fake. It used to be every day people posting on there, but now it's all "Internet specific people".

And websites used to be experiences. For bands, video games, whatever. Now it's all so minimalistic. There aren't any "extra" features.

I don't know if I'm interested in going back to forums.

And I've also learned about so many video games, music, movies, novels, companies from Instagram. And I'd lost that a bit if I left. Like…so many things aren't pushed outside the Internet. There's no more G4. You know what I mean? There aren't always ads in public spaces. And even if there were…there's only so much space on a physical or digital billboard, in a magazine, radio, TV, and all that.

I'm sure the world wouldn't end if I went offline, but…I don't know.

October 11, 2024 6:53 AM

-Chris