#grog you piece of shit

[gior-gio]

Random person that is not even my type: *says one nice thing to me once*

Me: I will develop a crush so big on you that it will traumatize me for life

[write-it-motherfuckers]

Well, that was a much bigger shitstorm than I had been expecting.

First of all, kid's ok, they just kept him over night because he's so young and concussions are a bit more of a risk, especially given his extensive medical history. Thankfully though, he seems to be on the mend, and he should be home by the time you Darlings are seeing this post.

As for why you're seeing this post, originally I was just meant to be playing emergency babysitter until the dad finished work and got home, but unfortunately he's just as big of a piece of shit as he usually is (Why they're still together and actively having more kids I have no idea) and decided that since someone was already with the kids, then instead of rushing home like he was asked to by his wife, he was going to make the best of it and go out drinking with his friends.

Both his wife and his elderly mother in law tried to contact him, but after the third set of calls, he turned off his phone. Not once did he ask who was with his kids, or how his injured son was, all he cared about was going out and drinking. (I sincerely hope she leaves his arse soon. Holy shit)

The mum did apologise to me repeatedly, but since their only living family is her elderly mother who is by no means capable of looking after five kids under the age of seven, she really didn't have a choice but to rely on me until her or her (shitty) husband could return home. And for obvious reasons, she couldn't exactly leave a four year old in the hospital by himself.

In the end, the "dad" didn't get home until about nine am this morning, stinking of grog, and I don't feel comfortable leaving them with him. I did quickly head back and grab a charger for my phone so that I could type this up, but since the youngest ones will be waking from their after feed nap soon, and the mum is still a way's off from getting back, I'm probably not going to have time to sort through my reblogs properly.

On a small positive note though, it does look like all my stuff is back now, so I should be able to go back to posting older reblogs tomorrow. For now, I'm just going to focus on the kids and then go back and crash into my own bed.

Thank you for your understanding and patience, Darling ones. Please remember to take care of yourselves 🖤

[railroad-migraine]

In honour of Legend of Vox Machina coming out, can we have a Percy x (fem/gender neutral) reader with the prompt "You feel like home to me." Maybe reader also lost their home (or they were from Whitestone too)

'Welcome Home'

-> Percy x GN!Reader

Notes: Angst and fluff, hurt comfort. I started writing this piece in January 2022. As of June 2023, I have now watched TLOVM. Sorry it took a while Anon, but I wanted to save your lovely request for when I eventually got into Vox Machina 💙 Can be read as platonic or romantic

~ Poet

*****

It wasn't meant to be like this.

Things had not gone to plan. What was the plan, you say? That is debatable depending on who you'd ask.

To start, Vax was unfortunately spotted skulking around the enemy's camp. That then lead to small confrontation, one that he'd be fine to handle all by himself, one where he was suspiciously poked and prodded at innocently, but Keyleth instinctually stepped in to save him - thus getting the whole party involved and quickly overwhelmed. It was manageable until the exact moment where Grog lopped off the head of one of the bandits.

To put it simply, all hell broke loose and it all went to shit.

However, in the end, when the bandits lay dead and smloldering by the campfire, it was a victory for Vox Machina.

A victory, maybe. But not quite a win.

Wounds were in need of tending to, and Pike was far too exhausted to treat everyone. Camping in the woods did not seem to be the best option, the trees offering little cover, and neither did the cliff face nearby. Frustrated, tired, hungry - voices raising at each other prickled the hairs at the back of your neck and you knew you had to step up. To be the adult.

"There is a village," you start, but no one chooses to listen, your voice just another one in the argument.

"There is a village," you repeat, a little more firm and insistant, and the others begin to withdraw, eyes falling onto you, "not far from here. I- I didn't mention it before because it doesn't belong on the map. Not anymore, at least.

"We can go there, set up camp, sit down and just shut up for a few hours," you sigh.

Most of the party look hesitant but Scanlan raises a brow and shrugs with an easy nonchalance that you envy. "If you say it's safe, I'm down."

It wasn't meant to be like this.

"It is." You hope. "I promise.

Percy watches you carefully, the fading light of the Sun behind him casting shadows on his face, sharpens his already sharp jawline even further until it cuts into his coat's collar. Something dangerous in his expression. "Lead on, then," but he doesn't sound convinced.

And so you lead your friends to the home and earth that once nurtured your childhood, the very same that you abandoned all those years ago in favour of adventure.

You were still young. Like a child, scarrless, soft, green and new to the greater world that waited for you beyond your doorstep.

It wasn't meant to be like this, you think as you fall to your knees, taking in the grim sight before you. It's hard to tell what exactly happened, whether the homes had been raided and intentionally burned down, or if it had been a simple accident and the townspeople luckily fled somewhere safe.

How long had it been since you left home? What seemed like yesterday were many, many months for your people, and anything can happen in that time apart.

But you never expected to be returning home to a graveyard.

It wasn't meant to be like this.

"I'm sorry."

You sniffle and quickly wipe your nose with the sleeve of your shirt, choking back a bitter laugh. "Percy." He pulls his mouth into a straight line, a grimace of sorts. "You can be a thorn in my side at times, but why should you be sorry?"

He shifts his weight on his feet. "Because... because it's what people might have said to me when I was in a similar state. I'm not sure if it would ever have made me feel better, but I suppose it shows some level of... respect. Condolences. Comfort, sometimes. Or so I've heard."

He pulls his coat tighter around his torso, the bite in the air unforgiving even as you mourn for your childhood home while your knees press into dirt. You risk a glance up at his face, and his forlorn expression shatters your already broken heart. He feigns a weak smile, and ducks his chin in sympathy. "It's not for everyone, I suppose."

It's a cold comfort as your grip on the ashes of your home loosens, and slips through your fingers, like sand lost in the wind.

Percy says your name, clear and grounding, and you manage to tear your gaze from what's left of your history. "Look at me." You crane your neck to look to where he looms over your hunched form. "Home is a feeling... I know that more than anybody."

Slowly, so slowly and gentle as if caught in slow motion, he crouches down to meet your height. He appraises you for a hesitant moment, then reaches out to wipe a tear that trails down your cheek, one that you had accidentally neglected. It smears across your skin smoothly, leaving a clean line in the thin layer of dust you had acquired since the battle and trek over here.

He looks at you softly, and you nearly sob from the incredible amount of emotions you feel all at once. You grip his hand like a lifeline and press it into your face so that you can lean into the comfort he's providing, and a shudder washes over you at the warmth radiating from his glove.

Percy nudges your chin up with his free hand, and you have no choice but to meet his watery eyes.

"And you feel like home to me."

In that moment, you know you feel the same for him.

*****

[posts this and RUNS]

[waltwhitmansbeard]

this is literally all i could think about on my drive to work today so i present to you

what cars would vox machina drive?

keyleth: you know she's a subaru girlie, olive green and dented (bc lbr keyleth would not be the best driver) and covered in just ALLLL the bumper stickers, for state parks and liberal politicians from like two decades ago and charities she doesn't even remember donating to (she has three different "who saved who?" bumper stickers and she doesn't know how she got any of them). there's a rattle that starts whenever she gets over 40 mph but she's choosing to ignore it.

percy: this is an old money bitch so you know he has a bunch of cars, mercedes and aston martins and bentleys, but i think his go-to is a brick of a rolls royce, dark gray bc black is too obvious

vax: an olllllllld black thunderbird that is absolutely falling apart, just a complete hazard to have on the roads, but vax pours any excess dollar he has into keeping the piece of shit running bc he loves it so much

vex: a sensible, clean honda civic sport (blue) that has every single bell and whistle offered but that she negotiated down to $10k below the sticker price. she will drive this thing into the fucking ground before she gets a new one. the back seat has a special protector/sling thing for trinket.

pike: just the most absolute unit of a gargantuan pick-up truck you can imagine. something that no self-respecting construction professional would even drive, just so fucking mammoth that the TIRES are taller than pike. she has special electric stairs that descend so she can get in. she has this because a) she is a monster and she deserves it and b)

grog failed his driver's test (both written and practical) six times before just giving up, so he just goes wherever pike goes

scanlan: a tricked-out cadillac he had specially painted the most gnarly shade of purple with sparkling gold rims and LED lights along the undercarriage that are linked to his illegal stereo that he is always bumping way too loud with the windows down. just a fucking pimpmobile of a vehicle. leather seats that you do NOT want to look at under a black light and special hidden compartments for the contraband he insists he has but absolutely does not.

tary: this twunk drives a gold porsche 911, and he hates giving his friends rides when they need one but when he does, he makes them take their shoes off. do NOT ask him for the aux, it is a waste of your time. he is an insanely reckless driver, and once he finally wrecks the porsche for good, he's shocked to learn how much they cost (this one was a gift), so vex drags him kicking and screaming to honda to get him a civic of his own (not as nice as hers bc without daddy's money he definitely can't afford it).

[utilitycaster]

How Funny is it for Chetney to die on the Next Long Rest: 3x82

since I started this only last episode here is a link the previous edition to refresh your memories re: the vibe. Also only 15 minutes or so have passed since then which means most of that post is still entirely relevant. It's okay though because for my own entertainment I have added a bonus feature at the bottom:

Hilarity considerations:

Just hard-carried the thinking of the party; farewell to what few arcana checks were made

finally: a werewolf that has reached the moon! what shall he do oh he's dead huh

there's still plenty of time on the moon today for him to pick up a piece of predathos BEFORE the long rest. Does the responsibility to pass that along fall to the rest of the party? THERE'S a shenanigan to be sure?

Does he have a death letter. He better have a death letter. Everyone should have one (Molly is excused bc he is proudly barely literate bless his heart and also Taliesin's letter for Percy was good enough for two games). If he does it's gonna be LIT.

No really imagine you are Matt though and Chet just fucking dies on the moon. This is a complication for Matt but it is funny for me.

I think he should play as Yussa if this happens.

Hilarity complications:

Honestly they are roughly the same as last time but I did just remember Dorao too. Plot is stored in the Travis Character. I don't mind plotlines ending bc of this death but man that destroys any ongoing non-moon plotlines basically except whatever the fuck is going on with Delilah. You know how two of the three post-Campaign VM one-shots are specifically because Grog pulled a card from the Deck of Many Things? This would be like the opposite of that. Campaign ends ten episodes earlier than it would have because we don't have any of Chet's stuff.

What if he plays one of Ishto's party members who DID actually make it but got trapped on the moon. That's a weird dynamic.

The return to the war council becomes messier and messier...Bells Hells has: raised the alarm for basically every Reilora. Otohan is here. They have left SO many witnesses. And now they got a new guy.

Forecast: 1% chance of Chetney Death. A weird arcane lightning rod level of hilarity.

Bonus because this might get repetitive (fun fact, the wizard tracker? also launched just as shit got WICKED repetitive because every episode was like max 3 hours of real time. it is my gift, and my curse.) Things in this episode with slightly more personality than Otohan Thull:

The polymorphed possum

The nervous unnamed Vanguard member in the tent

The tent

The hypothetical concept of Tent Kite

[taste-of-the-divine]

ꕤ | Who's Begging Now? | Vax'ildan

— VOX MACHINA : cockysubby!vax'ildan x fdom!reader

✩ 𝙎𝘾𝙀𝙉𝙀: ​you put vax'ildan in his place, pretty little noises and all. ✩ 𝙋𝙊𝙎𝙏 𝙄𝙉𝙁𝙊: drabble, 1.2k words ✩ 𝘾𝙊𝙉𝙏𝙀𝙉𝙏 𝙒𝘼𝙍𝙉𝙄𝙉𝙂: vax'ildan recieves + reader gives : dubcon, somnophelia, overstimulation, humiliation, degredation, deep throat, sex drugs, messy spit/saliva, begging to cum, orgasm denial/edging, ruined orgasm, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, aftercare // reader recieves + vaildan gives: deepthroat on vax's cock, gagging, humiliation outside the bedroom, being called ma'am.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ 𝙉𝙊𝙏𝙀𝙎 𝙁𝙍𝙊𝙈 𝘿𝙄𝙑𝙄𝙉𝙀: this was supposed to be way shorter but i got carried away but likes and reblogs are super appreciated :’)

𝘔𝘖𝘙𝘌 𝘝𝘖𝘟 𝘔𝘈𝘊𝘏𝘐𝘕𝘈 | 𝘔𝘈𝘚𝘛𝘌𝘙𝘓𝘐𝘚𝘛 & 𝘖𝘛𝘏𝘌𝘙 𝘞𝘖𝘙𝘒𝘚 | 𝘔𝘠 𝘗𝘈𝘎𝘌

vax’ildan has been acting out of line lately— he’s bold, flirtatious, he’s always been so— but something’s changed, you can feel it. he’s gotten cocky. he talks back a little more now, he intentionally towers over you when you sit at the end of the bed. he pushes you to your knees now, too, places his cock on your lips and cheeks and smears it over those plump lips of yours that he loves so much— ah, correction: that he loves fucking, ramming, bruising, so much, with the base of his heavy cock. the feeling of his pubes tickling your lips and you gagging at the same is a familiar one— so much so that dick nuzzling isn’t practical anymore.

he enjoys being in charge; you enjoy letting him think he’s in charge. but now he’s getting too cocky— you hear him bragging to scanlan, grog, pyke, gilmore, anyone that would listen, about how he forces you to the floor, how you turn into putty in his hands, how you beg for him to fuck you like you want no one else’s cock but his.

but you know it’s all a fucking lie. what a pathetic piece of shit. fucker needs to be put in his place, so the next morning, right before he wakes up, you find secure cuffs for his wrists and ankles from somewhere in the house. he’s still sleeping but his cock is throbbing under the thin fabrics of his boxers, leaking precum at the tip. you mouth at him through the boxers first, and then you pull him free and take his whole cock into your mouth.

he wakes with a groan, tugs on the handcuffs. how fucking pathetic. fitting for you, you say, lifting off his cock. he’s incredibly hard, his hips bucking involuntarily, looking for the warm wet of your mouth and his mind is muddled, foggy, can only think about cumming. you drugged his drink the night before, just an aphrodisiac. he had a lesson to learn, and you had to teach him, all means necessary.

you jerk his cock— he moans and tugs at the cuffs— until his balls are tight and he goes light headed from how much blood is pumping through it, keeping it big and heavy. the veins pop angry and blue and purple, throbbing in your hand. his cock is as much of a drooling mess of precum over your fingers as is he is— head rolled back, lips parted, panting and begging you to drag your hands on the underside because that’s all he needs to cum. you don’t, because he forgot to say please, so instead, he says your name in prayer as his eyes goes crossed when you let your spit dribble down your chin and slide onto his sensitive cock head. you love watching him like this, love watching his body spasm and jerk at every touch, watching that his stupid fucked out face and that stupid fucked our brain trying to ask for something he won’t get. his whimpers are starting to sound like crying, voice climbing in pitch. his skin is flushed so, so, so pretty, you tell him this, between scolding him and asking him who’s the one begging to cum now? who’s the one that’s desperate? im going to tell the others about how utterly embarrassing you are.

he knows his answers to these questions, cries, me, me, me, I’m desperate to cum, please, ma’am, please— please don’t tell the others, please please, i’m sorry— and then suddenly your hand are wrapped around his throat and he knows he just fucked up. his eyes are wide, taking in your pissed off and disgusted face, and he can’t help but almost cum from how ashamed he feels. his dick throbs against his stomach, but you keep your eyes on him. i wasn’t asking, you stupid pet, you spit in his face. and that name, his favorite name that you use to put him into his place— it’s enough to make him go over the edge with fluttering eye lids as his mouth falls open, panting like a dog and making broken vocal sounds as his hips go taught and he cums. his head feels like there’s a million stars in there wanting to burst right out of his cock, and his cock needs friction while he cums because even though he’s cumming it isn’t isnt enough to get rid of the aphrodisiac that makes his balls aching to cum again. he looks at you, a whimpering mess with tears in his eyes, begging with them for you to do something, to make this go away, please I need to cum again, he says with his hazel irises.

you take mercy on him, he seems to have learned his lesson— you grip his cock in your hand an pump once, and like that, he folds in on himself as much as his bound limbs let him, a cry forming from his chest as he cums a second time, this time so much incredibly harder than the first that he almost goes unconscious twice throughout it. his eyes are white, he can’t even breathe, hips and cock twitching into and in your hand as you smear his cum over his sensitive tip. eventually his chest fills with air, but his face looks like he'd been properly fucked in the ass even though you've only used your hands and mouth. so pathetic.

when you’re done with the fun you’re having with him, you leave him there, bound to the frame of the bed slick in his own sweat. he learned his lesson, so after a few minutes, you come back with a glass of water and some fresh snacks from the kitchen. you take his bruised wrists and ankles out of the cuffs, massaging the cuts and kissing them better, cuddling him as he stirs awake from his sex haze. you kiss him, remind him that he’s yours, you love him, but firmly tell him he has no place lying about who’s desperate in the bedroom. he nods his face into your chest, tears welling in the corners of his eyes that you kiss away, whispering in his ear that you love him all the same. his arms wrap around your waist tighter, muttering that he loves you too, thank you, thank you, thank you ma’am, i won’t do it again.

© copyright @taste-of-the-divine 2023 𝘔𝘖𝘙𝘌 𝘝𝘖𝘟 𝘔𝘈𝘊𝘏𝘐𝘕𝘈 | 𝘔𝘈𝘚𝘛𝘌𝘙𝘓𝘐𝘚𝘛 & 𝘖𝘛𝘏𝘌𝘙 𝘞𝘖𝘙𝘒𝘚 | 𝘔𝘠 𝘗𝘈𝘎𝘌

[marcussour]

C3E114 random bits and thoughts

2025 - MAKE MORE SMUT

"Hey guys, we're saving the world again", "What would they do without us"

Oh, I love that Percy's going full tinkerer with wind up toys that are secretly weapons

Love that Vex's first attack with the explosive arrow was a nat20.

Fuck, the giant vidulch is something else. And of course it's the Sunder King's mount.

"That's the 20th count of the initiative", MATTHEW, WHAT ARE YOU DOING

Oh, thankfully it was both nat 1s

I love Ashley's "GOOSH" sound effect

"Scanlan, what does your horse eyes see?"

I love that now's officially "Scanlan's Hand"

Vorak!

"That's what the nuns told me sex was like"

I expected nothing them from them than to burst into singing Manfred Mann's Earth Band's "Blinded by the Light"

The holy aura spell really was a life saver, since every enemy has been attacking with disadvantage and avoiding all the nat 20s

And of course the moment after I wrote that, Lieve'tel dropped concentration

"Here's what I'm gonna do" by Ashley Johnson

TRINKET!

DIVINE INTERVENTION! Lieve'tel is just, clutch

"You take 14 points of acid damage"; "we'll buy you some Pink Floyd"

Over 100 points of damage in a single round. High level barbarians are something else.

So the beacon was somewhat related to the Luxon

So long bloody bridge!

Scanlan's (and Sam's) hate for Trinket, will never stop being funny

That frenzied wrath that Ozo's has is crazy

OH NO VEX

Look, I know they can revive her still, and it wouldn't be Vox Machina without at least someone dying, but shit, that one hurt

See, she's back thankfully

Love Percy's long ass turn, just, unloading anything on Ozo to avenge Vex

"He's inside of you one last time", "Balls deep"; the more things change... etc, etc

VAX'ILDAN!

Rest in pieces Malleus Key

Of course Vax's first roll is a nat20

If I had a nickel for every time in this campaign that a priced mount/companion of a big boss enemy turned against them due to the actions of the party

THAT WAS THE MOST GROG WAY TO JUST WRECKING UP AN ENEMY, AMAZING

What would Scanlan do

Make it Funny, Make it Cool, Make it Perverted!

"Hey, you look like diseased genitalia. Tell me, does it burn when you urinate?", Robbie's a gift

Look at Vax just being back and cool as fuck

NGL, I wanted Scalan to keep the vidulch and just, take him whenever he rejoins his mid-midlife crisis escapades.

One night. Let's pretend everything's alright for one night.

I didn't expected a happy ending, but that was bittersweet.

I do have to say, besides Vax getting one night along with the group, it did left me with some questions. Because the whole conversation with the Raven Queen sounded like, maybe Vax can/might serve her in the material plane?

Also, what is going on in Issylra? The angels told them that they needed to regroup, and plan the next stage of the attack, possible on Ruidus? Like, is it prepping in case both Bells Hells and the Mighty Nein fail? Is it related to if/when Predathos awakens? Or is something else going on? Like, maybe Ludinus or someone else attacked Vasselheim while everyone was away? I don't think it was the broadcast of the message from Aeor since I imagine Vox Machina would've gotten it too. Lots of things that might happen.

Anyway, loved this mini arc or whatever we want to call it. Having Vox Machina again was just, the best.

Also, did Lieve'tel went with them to Whitestone? I imagine she did, if only so she could visit Bertrand's grave.

[innocent-cat]

Hello! if you're still taking request could it be a crossover headcanons of vox machina x mha, were there member is like shoto todoroki or vox machina x one piece were there member is like nico robin. Which one do you prefer? Its okay for me.

Hiii! I'd be more than willing to write a "fire/ice curse" headcannon ;)

Vox Machina x Reader Head Canons

Warnings - none?

"Cold shoulder.", Vox Machina x Reader

.·:*¨༺༻¨*:·..·:*¨༺༻¨*:·..·:*¨༺༻

Okay, so the entire team has their own negatives that everyone seems to like.. make a good thing and use it to their advantage?

Obviously, for plot reasons, you have Shoto's family trauma too.

They have NEVER seen your ice/fire curse as something to be looked down upon, but they never really tried to convince you it isn't.

I feel like they'd be too awkward about it knowing the background LMFAO

Because of this, you just kind of thought they were equally as ashamed of you as you were with yourself.

It's some powerful magic shit so they try to tell you to be careful about it, you took it the wrong way

You eventually end up talking to Keyleth about it, and she started squabbling about it to you nervously because she thought she offended you

In all actuality, they all love you and enjoy your company.

They think its cool when you do ice tricks.

It obviously took you a while to warm up to them with fire magic, and its always nice to have around winter.

Pike specifically asks you to warm a lot of stuff up for her, since you figured out how to just make your hands warm.

Usually things like socks, blankets, food, drinks, or for you to boil water in the middle of no where.

It's always a funny conversation to have with her.

"Heyyy.. uhmmm... You mind-"

You take the item and already start heating your hands up.

"No. No I do not."

You love being helpful to them ˙◠˙

Percy likes to bring you to his little workshop and make you his assistant, he finds its much easier to make weaponry or contraptions with someone who can help him bend metal.

"Hands?"

You stick your hands out, and he places a long, thin, spiral of metal on them.

"Thank you." You hum. in response to him.

Percy is so thankful to you out of all of them. He says thank you for every little thing.

if you feeling a little romantical about himm... he says thank you when you hold his hand in the cold or his face in the cold #cuties

BUT ANYWAY

Grog doesn't get it.

I mean, if I was him, I wouldn't either.

With all honesty, he's just worried for you.

At one point you overheard a conversation with him and Pike.

"Are they okay Pikey??? They just lit on fire and shot ice at the same time..˙◠˙"

"Yes, Grog, thats just they're magic.."

(At that point, Pike tried explaining it 13 times to him, and it was 4am)

Vex and Vax are utterly ridiculous about it.

Least petty twin siblings, honestly.

Vex asked you to light her arrow on fire so she could shoot Vax's coat 'accidentally' and burn it.

To be fair, in her defense, he asked you to freeze her gold chest lock so he could steal from her..

At one point, when you were still learning, You froze one of Keyleth's plants, and she got a brain freeze for a solid 15 seconds.

"Oh my GOSH! Keyleth I am so sorry oh my gosh.."

"No-no.. its okayy.. he was almost dead anyway.."

She said, holding her head, groaning from the severe brain freeze she suddenly got.

Req pt 2 if this gets popular, but add who u want more of ;)

[demigoddessqueens]

Okay so I’m wondering could you write a little something for Percy where the reader gets hit by some kind of curse (courtesy of Delilah😈😝) and she’s slowly turning to stone and she like confesses that she loves him at the last second cause like of course she waits and then percy is just such a mess because of course he was in love with her too but never said anything

And then maybe he confesses or cries or kisses her hand once she’s a statue or something to try to true love that shit but it doesn’t work and then grog accidentally knocks her over or something and Percy’s horrified because he thinks that’s the end of her and she’ll be shattered but instead the stone’s cracked open like an egg and the readers fine and she heard everything and this is getting to be a long ask but I think you get the picture 😅

Ohmygod 🤣💕😭😝💔😓 this man is gonna have a heart attack

Cassandra may have landed the fatal final blow to Delilah, but this witch was not done

You could see the witch summoning a last blow of magic before a final bolt was aimed at Percy. Everything moved too fast but slow at the same time.

You quickly moved to push Percy out of the way, the protests of the others buzzing in your ear, until you felt Delilah’s strike hitting you in the heart. Percy’s panicked cries sounded out through the chamber as he caught you when you stumbled.

It was almost instantaneous as you felt the loss of feeling start to spread. From across your chest to shoulders, to arms and legs that were now frozen.

“No, no no no! Why did you—? No! Why?!”

If you could feel your heart, it would have been breaking at Percy’s begging but you didn’t have enough time so you made the most of it.

“Percy, I don’t know how long I have. But…..I love you. I always have, and I always will.”

You quickly glanced to the rest of the party and Cassandra, frozen in horror at what Delilah had done.

“Love him well. He will need it.”

Percy’s green eyes shine brighter with the unshed tears that threatened to burst.

“Not you—not you too! I can’t lose you—.”

You already felt the stone creeping up your neck, just mere seconds before it was over.

“Percy, live a life for yourself. Find someone who will—.” Your words were cut short as the stone consumed you completely.

Percy’s anguished cry echoed throughout the chamber as he crumbled next to you. Still holding onto your stone hand he buried his head into it with broken teary murmurs of “I’m sorry, I love you.”

Frantically looking to help his friends, Grog searched through the bag for any of the elixirs or potions that could help.

“Percy maybe we could try—.” He meant well, but Grog bumping into the statue of you along with Percy almost set the rest of his nerves over the edge.

“Grog wait—!” The statue of you hit the floor with a resounding “thud!” as pieces chipped away at you.

For a while, Percy thought the last of his sanity slipped away until he saw a tuft of your hair peeking out. The rest of the stone was beginning to crack and he saw peeks of your skin.

“Quick, everyone help me! Please!”

The rest pitched in to help pick away at the pieces until the cracked stone was pushed away. You opened your eyes in amazement and shock, along with a deep breath. Percy choked on his relief as you were pulled into a bone-crushing hug

“I almost thought I lost you.”

Back at the home they were rewarded, Pike let out a deep sigh of relief at the sight of her friends. Her eyes wandered over to the sight of you and Percy huddled close together. His face buried into the crook of your neck as he held onto you tightly to his side.

“What happened to him?”

You all spoke in unison. “Don’t ask.”

[masterqwertster]

Got to thinking about it in this AU too, so...

Bells Hells C2 Class Swap AU and Titan Shit

Sometimes AUs walk slightly to the left of canon's path, and sometimes they run off into the bushes for a little while...

Also this is long, so it’s beneath the cut.

So, I don’t think Bells Hells ever even learns about the Spark of Rau'shan in this AU since Keyleth (and Pike) tag Ashton as titan-blooded about one month before the Apogee Solstice begins.

Because while Kiki is busy as fuck prepping for the Solstice and putting out Ludinus's Distractions For People of Importance and Power fires, I'm pretty sure she could put aside thirty minutes to Scry on Evontra'vir, Transport Via Plants through to him, and ask him "What the fuck did you tell/give to Efterin of the Hishari?" and get her answer before teleporting back to business. Or she could send a lackey to interrogate the tree, or Pike could go if she feels like it (get back to some of her sailing roots travelling the Shattered Teeth). Because there's no way they're letting a titan-blooded kid run around getting tangled up in Big World-Ending Problems without knowing what that means, if there's more titan blood to be found, and if more can be made any time soon because the last thing they need is another titan blood except they're batting for the other side.

Happily for Keyleth, the answer from Evontra'vir was "fulfilling Destiny" ...by sending Efterin after an artifact he knew the cultist would misuse and accidentally (but in accordance with Destiny) implant in his kid. Yeah, Keyleth's not impressed. But it is nice to know what exactly she sensed in Ashton: a Shard of Ka'Mort, Empress of Earth.

Also, no mention is made of the Spark of Rau'shan, as Evontra'vir is Destined to guide Ashton to that, so he's not telling anyone else. Though Keyleth suspects that if a fragment of Ka'Mort survived, there's also a piece of Rau'shan out there. But best to let sleeping dogs lie if it's gone unclaimed this long and getting the Shard of Ka'Mort took a Destiny Tree's instructions to retrieve.

Which is fine. There's a reason canon!Bells Hells found crispy skeletons in the spelunking nightmare but didn't get crisped themselves: the Spark wasn't willing to be moved without the Shard nearby. As evidenced by the roiling lava calming at Ashton's approach vs the Doompa Loompa report of Big Boom when someone upset the Spark (likely trying to take it away).

Anyways! What this means is that once Bells Hells has retrieved Blue-Butt Flowers (sorry, Matt) to help Keyleth recover, part of their Questions on What To Do Next is "Can we get Ashton more Titan Powers for their power-up? The [Hybrid Form] is cool and all, but kind of lame for a Titan Shard when you can go Earth Elemental better than him."

And Keyleth has been thinking about this. What she sensed in Ashton is immensely powerful, and the boi only seems to ever use an itty bitty fraction of that might, instead relying more on the strange other power that he's now religiously(?) tied to as well.

Her answer on the Titan Power-up front is two-fold:

1) Bells Hells can go to Vasselheim to see if the Stone Titan's corpse nudges anything, and potentially, probably, meet with Grog, who's still got the Titanstone Knuckles.

Keyleth kind of doubts the Stone Titan Corpse will do anything, being long dead and divorced of its elemental might beyond the continued existence of the body (otherwise the Whispered One was wasting a free Super Earthquake Machine). But it did make the Titanstone Knuckles react (because they were forged from that particular titan's heartstone), so it's not a 0% chance. Probably.

But Kiki does think the Titanstone Knuckles might do something for Ashton, since they are, in a way, an inanimate version of him.

...If Grog is still in town. Kiki may have lost track of her friend in all the Solstice hubbub.

2) Keyleth can send Bells Hells to Terrah, village of the Earth Ashari. The abundant elemental earth energy there might jumpstart Ashton's earth titan shit. And if that's not enough, they could try taking a few steps through the Rift to the Elemental Plane of Earth and see if that intensity of earth energies does the trick.

The problems with these ideas are:

Vasselheim will likely react poorly if they find out Keyleth sent a baby titan their way to do some teething on the titan corpse stuck in the middle of their city.

Keyleth definitely needs to talk to Pa'tice about sending a baby earth titan to Terrah for teething, because who knows what that will do to the energies and Elementals in the area and the Rift.

Now Chetney, FCG, and Imogen are all interested in going to Vasselheim, for different reasons. Chetney wants to check Issylra off his List of Continents He's Been To. FCG would like to visit a big Changebringer Temple for advice/guidance (yes, they still picked up religion. It just doesn't fuel his powers this time). And Imogen wants to visit the Stormlord's big temple to further pursue the challenge of following him that she started during the Party Split.

Of course, Team Issylra is wary of going to Vasselheim considering they helped kill part of a missionary group from Vasselheim.

Fearne is neutral and goes where Orym goes.

Well, since it's going to take Keyleth a little while to talk with Pa'tice and get the okay for Bells Hells to visit, she was thinking Maeve could take them to Vasselheim for a day or two while she does that.

...With a quick, initial detour to get Dancer (and crew) on fixing the Quintessence Array. Just in case Bells Hells finds anything of interest to slurp up. (Also because I'd like FCG and Dancer to find their closure still. And don't want to have to worry about the logistics of failing to stop Ratanish's Joe-assisted sabotage before they start making skyships drop out of the sky...)

So, Vasselheim!

Yeah, they can see the titan corpse from where they arrive in the Abundant Terrance. Which is a completely different district than where its feet are planted.

First stop though, ends up being the Changebringer Temple (which I don't see an official location for on the wiki, but think makes sense to be placed in the Quadroads as a crossroads of sorts for the goddess of roads). Partially because it's on the way and partially because FCG is getting a lot of looks of dislike from the locals, so Temple approval for the robit should help. Hopefully.

Keyleth did not think through sending a soul in an arcane machine to a city that severely distrusts the arcane. Thankfully, he's got friends to phalanx around him and stare down the glares. ...And Laudna may have to go inside the phalanx too, as undead.

So! FCG gets to talk to more holy people who follow the same goddess as him. And maybe gets to meet a therapist-type, to replace the meeting with Jirana, so they get that realization too.

Next stop: the Braving Grounds. Which has all of the other attractions Bells Hells is interested in.

Ashton, Chetney, and Fearne (as she is a barbarian in this AU) are all super interested in The Crucible fighting pit when they come across it. So probably some matches to roll there. ...Though Fearne may be more interested in picking gambler pockets than fighting herself. Laudna is welcome to try too as a monk/frontliner. And so is Imogen, as an attempt to further impress the Stormlord into being the new juice behind her cleric abilities.

When they drop by the Trial Forge (Stormlord's Temple), after talking with Groon's apprentice(? whatever you want to call the person being trained to take over after him because monks age super well but don't live forever and Groon is old. Also, for extra trouble, they could be a really buff older woman, to mess with Imogen's taste in women) who's currently running the place since the Earthbreaker himself is at the Red Center Resistance camp, the Stormlord does present Imogen with a challenge. But not his usual "Where does your strength come from?" question. Because let's be real: Imogen would immediately and without hesitation answer "Laudna," which is generally the correct answer, even if it's not the whole "My friends are my strength" answer he's usually searching for. So I think the Stormlord should challenge Imogen to not use her mindreading on others (or at least the party) for a while, to make her actually communicate with the group instead of brain-checking when she gets impatient. Make her learn that while her mind powers are a strength, there's more to be found in trusting her friends, in having faith in them.

Then it's off to actually get a close up look at the titan corpse. Which, hot damn is it huge. Like, they knew that already since they could see it the whole time they've walked around the city, but it's even more mind-boggling up close.

And then they have a moment of realization that what's inside Ashton was probably bigger and even more badass. After all, no one remembers this one's name or any titles it might have held, but Ashton's got a piece of Ka'Mort, Empress of Earth.

Also, like, what the fuck has Vasselheim done with the titan corpse parked in the middle of their city? Is it now a giant condo complex (that slowly drives people cambial insane like the dwarves of Thomara)? Is it a shopping mall? Is it a new skyport? A challenging free-climbing "mountain"? Just a tourist attraction? Seriously, what did they do with this giant obstruction in the middle of their city over the past thirty years? Tell us, Matt!

Anyways, they sidle on up to one of the titan's feet so Ashton can touch it (He touched the butt foot). This may include sneaking past guards to keep people from doing exactly that.

It doesn't awaken any powers in Ashton, but they do get a use of Grim Psychometry on it. Which Ashton technically shouldn't really have yet, as Bells Hells probably needs to go through one more big fight before reaching Level 11 (canon level up was after getting on the ghost ship), allowing for 2 Cleric/9 Blood Hunter, but I'm giving it to him just this once anyways for Titan Shit.

Ashton gets to see flashes of the Stone Titan living its life in the primordial chaos of early, early Exandria, and the death of the Stone Titan (which made a mountain range with the impact of its body being thrust into the ground). Maybe a bit of its zombie march on Vasselheim via the Whispered One's power. He just gains a bit of understanding of what the titans were.

That's about all I have planned for Vasselheim. Of course, there's room to get in trouble, visit the Slayer's Take, talk with Maeve (try to get childhood blackmail on Orym), let paladin Chet visit the All-Hammer Temple, have Delilah stir to cause trouble at the site of her most recent defeat (or close enough to it), and do other stuff for the day or two they're there.

I should also mention that Bells Hells has been asking about Grog while they've been running around, but they don't get anything recent or distinct enough to follow to find him. Mostly because I'd love to know where Grog is in canon ...and also really kind of love the moon-greeter Grog that came up on 4-Sided Dive ep18.

Or Bells Hells does locate the Grand Poobah, and have to bail Grog out of jail. And deal with Ashton trying to steal or fleece Grog out of the Titanstone Knuckles. The Knuckles call to them and seem so... tasty.

Adventures in Vasselheim done (or they can be skipped in exchange for hanging out in Zephrah, but I do like the opportunities it provides for other party members to achieve stuff), it's back to Zephrah to see if Keyleth has gotten Bells Hells the okay to go to Terrah.

She has, so off they go through a tree! ...to an hour or two out of town so that Bells Hells has the (escorted) hike towards Terrah and its Rift to see how Ashton reacts to that energy and that energy reacts to him. With plenty of time to back out or be sent away.

Ashton is definitely feeling more energetic the closer they get to town and the Rift. And having to fight off the growing urge to take on their Hybrid Form. Meanwhile, the local earth elementals/eidolons are clearly taking notice of the baby titan coming into town. They are not being terribly subtle about following Ashton around and/or wanting a bit of attention from him while doing whatever he asks of them.

Once they get to Terrah proper, Bells Hells spends some time helping around under Pa'tice's supervision (the place was recently in trouble with a cult trying to destabilize the Rift, I'm sure there's some cleanup Bells Hell can creatively help with) and poking at Ashton to see if his powers have upgraded yet. And while I'd say that the earth energy there gives an extension to Ashton's time in their Hybrid Form, it's just not quite enough to really wake up the Shard.

Which mean field trip time!

Bells Hells take what is meant to be a trip to loiter around the Rift until something happens for Ashton, but ends up being more of an adventure because Reasons.

Reasons could be Cult of the Dark Heart people still hanging around on the Earth Plane side of the Rift that Bells Hells chases down for potential info or because they kidnap someone (from the party or an Earth Ashari guide/guard). Could be a bunch of Earth Elementals cart Ashton away to be worshipped as the Empress returned and now Bells Hells has to get them back. Or it could be that Bells Hells thought they spotted something interesting and ended up running after it like they do (see rabbit with a Feywild Shard back in the Heartmoore).

Any which way Bells Hells gets dragged into exploring the Plane a little bit, they do manage to awaken Ashton's Shard. Which shifts his Hybrid Form to something closer to the canon Demi-titan Form, the differences being that it's crystal clusters/spikes instead of rock, they keep the crystal claw/fingers, and the light from the cracked cat's-eyes is purple-silver where if you stare deep enough into them, you see the dunamancy galaxy swirl inside, sort of like a geode.

Ashton also gets a Second-phase Form in place of the canon Demi-titan one which comes with the super awesome bells and whistles plus penalty costs. Second-phase is taller (10' instead of 8') and bulkier. And maybe gets a second set of arms? The Stone Titan had four arms and all, and it would further differentiate a full-on Titan Mode from his Hybrid Form. Also more punching power and being able to pick up and carry the whole party under his arms if the short kings are doubled up with other people. Also, Second-phase can be used separate from Hybrid Form.

I also think it would be fun for Bells Hells to pick up some treasures to slurp up with the Quintessence Array, or just use as is, possibly by trading with a Dao (earth genie) or raiding one's treasury. Or like, offerings/congratulatory gifts for "newborn" baby titan from the locals.

After getting back to Terrah, goals achieved, Bells Hells is off to Whitestone to pick up the Quintessence Array, possibly use it, and get their next assignment/mission.

They get to meet Allura, receive a dunamancy identification from her, maybe show off Ashton's new Hybrid Form (but not Second-phase because penalties) just to say "Look what we got!", and attend the war meeting where they volunteer for Moon Scouting.

Also squeeze in that visit to Nana Morri for Fearne's heritage because going to a different Plane made Fearne miss home and they didn't get anything interesting for her from the Earth Plane but surely Nana has something cool and powerful and useful for her granddaughter.

It would be kind of funny if Grovelthrash, an Arms of the Betrayers, is sitting in Nana's storage and she gives it to Fearne. The spirit of the hammer does like when its wielder claims treasures (Fearne is a consummate knickknack thief) and Fearne is so go with the flow that she'd breeze right past it liking to cause pain, warhammers work for barbarian aesthetic, and it allows her to be a little bit twinnie with Ashton since this weapon grants some earth-based abilities. Also, bringing in some Betrayer God stuff for funsies (and adding even more trouble besides Grazzt'char, assuming that it wasn't traded in the Earth Plane. ...Yeah, I forgot they lost it on the ghost ship they did not ride in this AU until this point).

But really, any sufficiently powerful weapon or (custom) Feat for Fearne is good enough.

Chetney makes his deal, of course.

Orym... most probably not. Wizards take the "slow" way to power by learning, and learning a lot, that allows them to bend the world to their will. And like, he can probably squeeze in a quick lesson from Allura while Fearne is dealing with her family instead of bargaining with Morri.

...Though I think Laudna might try to make canon!Orym's deal instead. Monks are great, but they're also more "normal" like Fighters, and she wants to be able to protect Imogen, no matter the cost. And the others to a less intense degree. Also, it is a chance to get rid of the threat of Delilah too, who is less relied on in this AU since she's not a Warlock Patron for Laudna and Laudna does have other people who care about her now. It's time to let go of her murderer who has kind of Stockholm Syndromed her with her possession.

All that done, and they're off to the Red Center for Moon Scouting Mission.

[onyxbird]

No Strings Attached

Summary: Jarett may not usually fight alongside his employers, but he knows them well enough to know when something just isn't right. They do this all the time, so surely they have some kind of strategy for if their cleric gets possessed, right? Pike has an unusual strategy for being in two places at once, and she trusts her friends implicitly. If only they had that much trust in themselves. Also on AO3.

Jarett darted behind the piece of broken wall Vax was already huddled behind and dropped to a crouch next to him. Every line of Vax's form screamed stress.

“Vax. Not to complicate this already terrible situation, but…” Jarett grimaced, trying to figure out the right way to explain.

“Yes?” said Vax, distractedly. He stared apprehensively at the spot where Percy had just unloaded several shots into a wyvern, but his eyes did not track its movement, as if he was lost in his own thoughts. A flash briefly illuminated the battlefield, its radiance casting Vax and Jarett into even deeper shadow, as Pike fired off a spell and sprinted for the next piece of cover as fast as her short legs could carry her.

Jarett hesitated, wondering if he was making a mistake.

Vax glanced over at him, eyes focused again. “Yes, Jarett, what is it?”

“I think there is something wrong with Pike,” he blurted. “She is acting strangely; she does not sound like herself. We must be on guard. If something is possessing Pike and pretending to be her, this could be a trap for us all.”

Vax closed his eyes and dropped his forehead against the stone in front of him with a soft thud. “Fuck!”

A slight scrape of stone on the other side of the wall made his head snap up again. He exploded to his feet, flinging three daggers in quick succession to bury themselves to the hilt into the monster's head. It let out an ear-splitting screech, clawing at the dagger buried in one eye, and Vax bolted, grabbing Jarett by the back of his collar and dragging him along.

Jarett stumbled scrambling to keep up, until they reached a larger, intact wall and Vax crammed them both into a shadowed alcove, Jarett first.

Jarett eyed him warily. “You do not seem as surprised as I expected.”

Vax cautiously peeked out of the alcove, checking for enemies, and at first Jarett thought he wasn't going to answer. Then, satisfied with his check, he spun back to Jarett and leaned in close.

“She's not here.”

“What?”

“Pike's not here,” hissed Vax. “Well, her body is, but—She's checking out that tunnel while we keep them busy, looking for any way to collapse that contraption and stop it. Astral projection. We were going to leave her safely behind, but she insisted we needed a healer and that they might get suspicious if she wasn't fighting with us.”

Jarett blinked at him, stunned. “But—” The distinctive warmth of one of Pike's group healing spells washed over him, and a cut over Vax's eye closed up. “—then who is that?!”

“Vex,” said Vax, miserably. “And me. Pike figured out a way to let us basically puppet her around while her conscious focus is elsewhere.”

The boom of falling rocks from the middle of the battlefield made Vax flinch, and he frantically grabbed for his earring. “Vex, did you get her—?” Jarett couldn't hear the answer, but Vax's relieved sag against the wall made it clear enough: Pike had escaped the impact.

They both poked their heads out of the alcove, scanning for enemies. Vax's daggers combined with Jarett's crossbow sent one of the still-flying wyverns crashing into the dirt. It didn't move again, and its rider tumbled across the ground.

Jarett ducked back into cover. “Why you?” Of all the questions spinning through his head, it was probably the one that mattered the least.

Vax rattled off the answer without hesitation—clearly, it had been a point of discussion. “Keyleth and Percy don't get on with gods; Grog knows less about magic than even I do and spends most of battle in a rage, and Scanlan—”

“Is Scanlan. Say no more.”

“Yeah, well—Shit!” A flash of panic crossed Vax's face as his eyes unfocused once more. A moment later he blinked and muttered, clearly not to Jarett, “Yeah, mostly got her out. Still got clipped by part of the swing, though. Should she heal herself or try to hit the fucker before he can get another swing in?”

…

Pike skidded to a stop next to Jarett, grabbing his arm and healing him. “Hey. More guys coming up from the south. Can you get to that gate and get it barred so we don't have more of these fuckers to deal with? Vex and Grog will cover you.”

A shower of arrows from above peppered their nearest enemies as the shadow of Vex on her broom swept over.

“Uh, yes. Yes, of course.” Jarett looked down into Pike's blue eyes. Vax's accent and manner of speaking coming from Pike's mouth in Pike's voice was somehow even more unsettling than the twins' imperfect imitation of her own. From the corner of his eye, he could see Vax clinging for dear life to the back of the wyvern vigorously attempting to buck him and his daggers off.

“Thank you, darling,” said Pike, now with Vex's forced brightness. “Clear path between the pillar to your left and the rider impaled on a tree. Hurry.”

Pike darted back behind a wall next to another guard and reached for her earring, her tone sliding smoothly back into a bubbly approximation of Pike's usual voice. “OK, guys, who else needs healing?”

Grog, currently smoldering and with a worryingly large hole in one thigh, said “No rush, Pikey, but I could use a little smidge when you have a chance…”

“Sure thing, buddy!” chirped Pike.

…

There were no wyverns left, and most of their grounded riders were down, too, when there was a distant boom and a slight shudder in the ground. Friends and enemies alike reacted in apprehension, trying to place what had happened and whether it boded good or ill.

“Oh, wow,” said Pike suddenly. “That's—Ooo, gosh, you guys have been having a time of it, haven't you? How's everyone doing?”

Multiple heads whipped around to look at her. She doubled over, one hand pressed to a wound in her side from a claw that had slipped between armor plates.

“Pike!” A swirl of black feathers plummeted from the air like a meteor to land beside her. “Oh gods, are you all right? I'm so sorry. I—”

Pike gently batted away his extended hand before it could touch her shoulder. “I'm fine; I'm OK. Save it for someone in worse shape.” She beamed up at him despite tears of pain welling up in the corners of her eyes. “You did great.”

“You're hurt.”

“No worse than normal for our fights; it just caught me by surprise just now. And we did it!”

Vax crumpled to his knees and wrapped her in a hug with arms and wings alike.

A small gauntleted hand poked out through feathers to pat vaguely in the vicinity of Vax's back. “Hey… hey, it's OK. You guys did great. I knew you would. I knew I'd be fine.”

Vax huffed a laugh that sounded more like a sob. “I didn't. Don't ever do that to us again. I thought we were going to get you killed.”

[goopsmoker]

sailing the seven seas right now got my black flag up got the navigator yapping all sorts of shit in one ear got the parrot squawking in the other and I'm just letting the wind hit those sails baby. I'm talking about shooting cannons out into the water singing little gay shanties and sea mist spraying over every hot piece of pirate booty on this ship i'm talking about drinking too much grog kissing the first mate on some "be that your cutlass pressing against me hook there matey...?" I mean real salty dog antics out here in these waters. plus i got fucking scurvy so if you hear about any schooners carrying some oranges maybe papaya be a pallywag send a message in a bottle my way

[kaylor]

Is campaign 3 worth watching 😭 im somewhere near ep 45 and there have just been so many arcs that do nothing for me. The stakes feel absurdly high for uhh level .. 6? and i thought it would get good at some point but if they still cant make a plan by ep 80 i dont think i care to waste my time 😭😭

yuhhhh i don't know man. the malleus key and the fallout of it is pretty dope, and idk how many spoilers you've seen so i'll leave it there. but after that it gets very boring again i can't lie.

you're so right about the high stakes!! these characters haven't had any space to breathe or grow since like episode 20 or whenever it was they found out about predathos and the world ending. they've been chasing a plot they're not ready for without doing any of the character work that makes you care about their goal. it's difficult to see why the party is together in the first place because they don't talk to each other or have any reason care about each other (except fearne/orym and imogen/laudna but the latter is so bland it's actually painful).

the party doesn't gel, there's no motivations from anyone beyond orym having a personal stake in it. imogen is so wishywashy about everything. none of them care about the gods except FCG, and no one in the party cares about FCG. except ashton, who is played so passively and unpleasantly that it doesn't even matter. there's no caleb/vax doing his biweekly checkins with each party member to unlock new dialogue. there's no fjord/grog to make a buckwild (yet thematically relevant) decision to direct the party in any direction. there's no driving force behind any of these characters like sorry liam and travis, turns out if you take a backseat to let your friends have the spotlight, they will do sweet fuck all!!

another problem i think is how they're given so many pieces of the puzzle at once, whilst the big bad is already in play. i don't know if that was matt's intention, but it's led to them barely following up on any character driven plot points because, well, the world might end. so any extracurricular character development is nixed in favor of chasing a maxxed out uberbaddy who is almost definitely going to kill them. any cool character moments kind of happen in spite of rather than thanks to the events, and honestly feel a bit forced sometimes because the characters have all been so stagnant for so long, and honestly the most interesting things about the characters are their backstories, which have already happened. their current motivations are a mystery and none of them seem interested in learning more about each other. it just feels very awkward and stale.

PLUS, the stakes are absurdly high but also there are no consequences for anything!! laudna dying didn't feel important because it wasn't permanent! because they can apparently just ask a member of vox machina for a resurrection!!! absolutely bizarre choice from matt to allow that, if i'm being completely honest. like sorry i know that's your wife but marisha should be 40 episodes deep into her backup character by now because there's absolutely no way anyone in VM would agree to resurrecting a delilah briarwood puppet let's be so serious. the party (especially imogen) dealing with a PC death would have made for some really interesting development, and would have created an opportunity for imogen to either take a leadership role to get revenge on otohan, OR break bad and turn on the rest of the party. some delicious pvp. but unfortunately laura doesn't seem to know what to do with her character and therefore does nothing, so it felt extremely flat and meaningless, which kind of sums up c3 tbh. some of the highest stakes but barely a PC who gives a shit.

the past say 10 episodes have been a slog for only a handful of cool moments, so i really hope post episode 82 it picks up a bit. plot is fun and situations are fun but i'm struggling to care about any of these characters because it doesn't seem like any of the cast care about them either. which is a shame because some of them have huge potential, FCG is literally an aeormaton!!!! my god you have GOT to get into it. why is no one getting into it!!!! will someone PLEASE pick up what sam is putting down!!! the payoff is always so good!!!

[toxiclizardwrites]

WIP Wednesday

Here's a snippet from the second chapter of my Delgado x OC fanfic, Love and Rage. The rest will be posted soon, enjoy!

Warnings: 18+, drinking/alcohol, swearing, etc. no spicy stuff in this excerpt but there is in the final piece.

Tags: @bearlytolerant @lisa-and-shadow @atonalginger @avani-telvanni @aro-pancake @fangbangerghoul @eridanidreams I miss anyone? Let me know and I'll tag you next time!

-------------------

Chapter 2: Tension on The Key

Toxic headed through Reckoner’s core on the way to the Rook bunks, but she was stopped by Naeva. “Hey Rook, where are you headed?” 

“To go to sleep,” Toxic replied flatly. 

 “You look like shit. Something happen on Suvorov?”

“No. Nothing. Well, we found something about the Legacy but Del has the details.”

Naeva nodded, and pulled out a knife and started playfully flipping it around. She spun it in her fingers so the tip was pointed towards Toxic’s body. 

On edge and tired, Toxic instinctively jumped back. “Wow, a bit jumpy, are we?” Naeva teased. “Yeah a bit,” Toxic responded flatly, just wanting to get to bed. Naeva looked at Toxic thoughtfully, like she was trying to make a decision. “You know what? Fuck it. You need a drink. Follow me.” She said, and gave Toxic a hard shove in the direction of the Last Nova. But Toxic hesitated. “Naeva, I'm—”

“Nope, we’re going” she said before Toxic could finish. Sensing that she didn't have a choice in the matter, Toxic sighed heavily and followed Naeva’s steps to the bar on the other end of Reckoner’s core. 

Entering The Last Nova was like wandering into the arms of an ex that's bad for you, but in the best way. The smell of cigarettes and stale booze accented the old earth-style American diner decor. The place was especially packed tonight. Toxic and Naeva passed pirates that were arm wrestling, fighting, or grinding on each other on the dance floor. Toxic paid close attention to their faces, but nobody so much as glanced in their direction unless they were looking at Naeva. She didn't command the same level of respect as Delgado, but her presence also didn't go unnoticed. 

The pair made their way to the bar, where Bog nodded, his eyes moving from Naeva to Toxic thoughtfully. “What’ll it be, ladies,” he asked while wiping down the counter. Naeva ordered two pints of bog’s grog and pushed one towards Toxic, who was sitting with her head resting in her hand. 

“Drink up, Rook,” she said with a grin, and Toxic begrudgingly picked up the pint to take a swig. The alcohol was strong, and had an earthy taste mixed with paint thinner. Toxic’s face contorted a bit at the mix, even though she tried to suppress it. 

Naeva laughed. “Your first time having an adult drink, whittle baby?” She chided.

Toxic forced a smile. “It's kind of fucking gross, you have to admit”

“Oh, you're not wrong, Rook—”

Their banter was interrupted by a loud, very drunk voice. 

“Well, well well, what do we have here?” Mathis said with a slight slur in his voice. 

Toxic rubbed her hands over her face in protest of Mathis’ presence, not bothering to turn to face him. This is where it happens, she thought. This is where he tells everyone what happened on Suvorov. She expected it, of course, but not so soon. She wasn't mentally prepared. But then again, could she ever be? Her mind was racing, but she tried to act like she didn't care by burying her face into her pint. 

[waltwhitmansbeard]

🥺 pikelan and 3 "sharing something personal" on the trust prompts?

3. sharing something personal now that gocmh is finally finished i am tackling all the prompts in my askbox! this is late c1, where things happen so quickly and in such rapid succession that i can't remember exactly how things go so just fit it in somewhere ig.

Scanlan knows he's earned this. Not Vax's easy welcome back or Vex's begrudging acceptance—those are beyond what he deserves, kindnesses he'll never be able to repay. No, Grog's silence, Pike's cold shoulder, those are a fitting response to his slinking back to Whitestone, tail between his legs. He doesn't know if it was better or worse to arrive in disguise. Probably worse. He usually just makes things worse.

But if he's spent the last year learning one thing, it's that you can't just let the shit you broke stay broken. And if he's spent it learning a second thing, it's that you have to seize that opportunities that come your way. So when he finds himself with a few minutes of quiet, here on their hurtling journey toward the end of the world, he finds Pike, asks her to talk.

The way her arms are crossed, her jaw set at a crushing angle, it doesn't seem much like she's in the mood to say anything, so he starts. "I just...y'know...wanted to check in. See if everything is...copacetic."

"Copacetic." The word sounds acidic on her tongue. "Right."

"You know. Big stuff happening. Gotta make sure we're all...on the same page."

She cocks her head to the side. She doesn't get mad often, Pike, but when she does, Scanlan can't help but be reminded of the way his mother would scowl at him, tired and disappointed. "Sure. Yeah. Same page. Can I go now?"

"I just...I know we've talked, a little. I mean, not really." Gods, his palms are sweaty. "I just hope you know that it wasn't you. None of it was you."

There's a shifting in her eyes at that, and Scanlan wishes he could rewind this last second and a half to watch it, over and over and over. She opens her mouth, closes it, opens it again, closes it again. Pike has always been so good at choosing her words carefully, but this is a level of conscientiousness that Scanlan isn't used to. "Do you know how many times you told me that you loved me, Scanlan?"

He is a boy. Just a small, stupid, frivolous little boy. "No. A lot."

"Yeah. A lot. And the thing is...when someone tells you something like that? Over and over? Even when you don't particularly wanna hear it?" She shrugs. "You start to believe it." Her eyes pierce into his, icy and infinite. "Joke's on me, I guess."

A thousand sentences start and die on his tongue—it wasn't a joke, I do love you, I was incapable of love, I'm sorry, if only I could take it back—but he just stares at her, his stomach sinking like a stone in water. He knows that he needs to say something, but what? What is he going to say, silver-tongued bard that he is, that fixes this?

She doesn't give him the chance to figure it out. She spins on her heel, storms off without a backward glance. She leaves him, cold and small, and as he watches her go, he can only hope that the end of the world waits long enough for him to put back the shattered pieces of his life before obliterating them for good.

[canadiankazz]

My The Legend of Vox Machina Season 2 Wishlist

Because we are getting SO CLOSE now to The Legend of Vox Machina Season 2, here's my list of things I hope they have in the show. There's a LOT here, and I know it's unlikely they'll have all of it, but a girl can dream!

(In no particular order, under a cut because of spoilers.)

Grog talking to Craven Edge in the toilet.

Keyleth turning a wyvern into a chicken, causing it and its rider to fall out of the air.

Scanlan hitting on Kaylie until she attacks him and reveals she's his daughter.

Scanlan trying to remember Kaylie's mother and realizing that to him, she was just another one night stand and can only barely remember her name.

Pike getting impaled by Craven Edge. Grog realizing that he has to get rid of the sword and walking off into the woods to die as it claims its price.

Vax: Hi. I don't want to be alone tonight. Do you? Keyleth: I haven't been wanting to be alone most nights.

"Take me instead you raven bitch."

Just the whole thing of Percy accidently setting off the trap at Purvan's tomb because they didn't want to wait for Vax. Vex dying as a result, and Vax's deal with the Raven Queen to bring her back.

The temple of the Raven Queen with its pool of blood.

Victor the black powder merchant. "LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES!"

Grog vs. Kevdak, including Grog falling 50ft through the air to land the HDYWTDT on Kevdak and cutting him in two.

"You know I'm not scared of death, right? I would die by a dragon, I would die by a beholder, and I wouldn't care, as long as it was beautiful death. But don't want to die from Kevdak… not him."

"Hello, uncle. The piece of shit you wiped off your boot has come home."

Vax and Scanlan inside Umbrasyl.

Vax finally accepting the role of Champion of the Raven Queen and getting his wings. "If you have any wings to lend me, now is the time."

"YOU FLYING FUCK!"

Vex getting her broom.

"Your secret is safe with my indifference."

"I live as long as Whitestone lives."

The Rakshasa posing as Gilmore and almost killing Vax. (Complete with Scanlan jumping off a balcony to save him.)

Scanlan's Magnificent Mansion.

"I'm a MONSTAH!"

"If I could pull the blood of you from my veins and give it back, I would! I want no part of you!"

Percy: You’re going to have to amend that one name, though, just to be fair. It’s Lady Vex'ahlia. Syldor: “Lady?” Percy: Lady Vex'ahlia, Baroness of the Third House of Whitestone and Grand Mistress of the Grey Hunt. So good sir, despite your relationship with her, do watch your manners.

"Bidet!"

"Life needs things to live."

Saundor: I could give you so much. I could give you the means to protect them. Your home. Vex: What would you ask in return? Saundor: Your heart. Vex: My heart is someone else’s. 

Artagan's reveal.

"Do you spice?"

J'mon Sa Ord. Just... J'mon Sa Ord. :D

The Sandkheg's Hide

Grog asking Pike to teach him how to read.

Keyleth using Control Weather to clear a path for their airship through a storm.

What Vox Machina do to Dr. Ripley after she kills Percy.

Percy's revival and the Percy/Vex kiss. "I should have told you. It's yours."

Percy answering the door to a naked Vex, wondering if they'd like to have their "talk."

Vax getting into the tub with Percy for a talk, and Vex's reveal after. "I thought he'd never leave!"

And... if we get as far this season as Vox Machina fighting Thordak and Raishan...

"Call me 'child' ONE MORE GODDAMN TIME!"

Vax getting the killing blow on Thordak.

Grog finding the Deck of Many Things.

Raishan getting feebleminded.

Raishan: Why won't you all just stay down and die with dignity? Vex: We don't do anything with dignity!

Dead Scanlan in Grog's arms. "FIX HIM!"

Scanlan getting brought back to life, only to fight with the rest of Vox Machina, insulting them all, and leaving with Kaylie. "What was my mother's name?!"

The introduction of Taryon Darrington. "This is going to be fun, fun, fun!"