#green fraud is still fraud
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We welcome the Grauniadâs digging into the âcreative accountingâ that underlies claims of âcarbon neutralityâ.
The massive differences in location-based and official scope 2 emissions numbers showcase just how carbon intensive data centers really are, and how deceptive firmsâ official emissions numbers can be. Meta, for example, reports its official scope 2 emissions for 2022 as 273 metric tons COâ equivalent â all of that attributable to data centers. Under the location-based accounting system, that number jumps to more than 3.8m metric tons of COâ equivalent for data centers alone â a more than 19,000 times increase.
It should be obvious that paying to build wind and solar facilities somewhere does not mean that your data center is âpowered by renewable energyâ. Some use of fossil fuels may be displaced, but even so, swapping kilowattâhours that come at their leisure oneâforâone against kilowattâhours that come when you call for them is clearly trading something of a lesser for something of a greater value.
Modern society demands, not merely energy, but energy services. From the beginning, those have been provided primarily by fossil fuels. The dataâprocessing industry has benefited from the delusion of a âtransition to a postâindustrial societyâ, in the course of which, âoffshoringâ of heavy industry has led to the temporary availability of large uncommitted blocks of dispatchable electric generation. Many factors, such as the withdrawal of obsolete generating plant from service, and the slow disappearance of the structural advantages of producing lowâmargin goods in countries with few labor and environmental protections, are requiring dataâprocessors to begin to really compete for electricity, while industry practices assure that (despite increasing machineâlevel efficiency) their power demand grows ever more rapidly. And that demand is strictly for âfirmâ, reliable power, the kind that comes when called for.
When we consider what society needs in terms of energy and energy services, it is clear that firm, dispatchable electric generation must be a large part of that. And at the same time, minimum environmental impact, in particular nearâzero COâ emissions, is an indispensible requirement for this basic largeâscale activity. Fortunately we have an energy source which exactly fits those requirements. When will energyâusing industries, and likewise publicâinterest journalists, face up to that?
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Itâs fair to ask : what is going on here?
One of the things opponents of atomic power like to do is to rhetorically lump it together with coal. This gives us an interesting insight, because from a power-system engineerâs perspective, coal and nuclear do the same job â but nuclear does it without all the unpleasant side-effects, such as the constant spewing of noxious effluvia into the air, the colossal mounting-up of ash piles, and the incessant rumbling of coal trains.
At the same time, renowned âenergy guruâ Amory Lovins, prophet of the solar future and implacable enemy of atomic power (the fellow who claimed that one kilogram of plutonium, dispersed in the environment, would cause twenty billion lung cancers), spent decades promoting a coal power plant on every city block as environmentally benign and a key component of his âsoft energy pathâ.
We are left to believe that it is not the evils of coal that they are most opposed to, but its benefits, which fission provides better than coal can.
Faced with the fact that atomic power, as practiced today (and we know we can do better), shows considerably lower life-cycle greenhouse gas emissions per kilowatt-hour generated than wind or solar, some Greens say âthe facts donât matterâ. (I have been told this to my face.) That at least is honest. Others switch rapidly from saying that the climate emergency is an existential threat and the most important issue of the present day, to saying âemissions arenât everything.â
Many of the older anti-nuclear crusaders, especially, will admit at some juncture that their objective is to transform society by moving to âdistributed energyâ. (One is left wondering just how distributed small-scale coal-burning really is â most city blocks donât have coal mines under them, and you wouldnât necessarily want to live on one that did.) They say that centralized energy is inherently authoritarian, and decentralized energy is inherently democratic.
The problem with their idealism is that a society characterized by decentralized energy isnât democratic. It's feudal.
With central-station power, your consumption of energy is limited by your income. With decentralized power, itâs limited by your wealth â your ability to afford solar panels and land to put them on. And wealth is distributed far more unequally than income. Central-station power means that people of small means can improve their lives by the use of energy. In a world of distributed energy, access to the benefits of energy depends on your relationship with a wealthy patron.
#green fraud is still fraud#antinuclearism#energy prosperity#energy democracy#coal kills#split don't emit#atomic power to the people
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Ep 96 in which...
Ikki steals Seiya's color palette.
bro really took out his contacts off screen đ
#phoenix ikki#saint seiya#new headcanon: ikki uses temporary hair color wax to make his hair blue and wears blue contacts#this is his true form#shun's hair is still naturally green tho#ikki is a fraud#in an actor AU this would be the most hilarious oversight#posts like this are why it takes me 2 hours to get through a single episode#shitposting
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Identity Fraud
Hunting
Part 6
Previous
Danny was having a good day. He had aced a presentation, turned in an essay early, and got a bunch of lab work done. Plus he was excited to hear about Elle's day! She had been so excited to go to that museum, he's sure she'd be bursting to tell him about-
She wasn't at the school. No one was at the school. Why wasn't anyone at the school?? What had he missed? Danny immediately checked his phone to find a call from the school and a voice mail. "Due to unforeseen events, the 5th grade field trip is cancelled for the day. All children will be brought home accompanied by a Gotham PD officer to insure safety. We at Gotham Academy-" Danny hung up before the voice mail could finish. Elle was possibly with a cop at their apartment, someone who could definitely turn them in. He needed to get to his sister, he needed to make sure she was alright. He needs to protect his little sister. Danny's core burned as he rushed back to his apartment to find nothing. Danny panicked, had they already taken her? Had Danny failed to protect her so soon?
She was still close
His core was buzzing as much as his ears were ringing. Danny went Ghost, he wasn't supposed to here, even if Gotham was full of ecto-energy and its own ghost as soon as he transformed he was trackable but Elle was so much more important than that. Plus they were likely already compromised. They'd have to hide again, maybe leave this country this time. He'll have Tucker and technus erase their identities here and make a new one wherever they land.
As Danny's thoughts spiral he went invisible and intangible fading through the building he knew Elle was in floor by floor, room by room. He needed to find her- He needed to find her. He needed to protect her.
Danny did find her. He found her dying on a couch from fucking Blood blossom poisoning. He found her surrounded by vigilantes and some muscular guy. A guy who had definitely died before. That didn't matter, he needed to focus on Elle. Danny dropped the Intangibility and invisibility as he crouched down in front of Elle gently placing a hand on her little face causing her to whine. Danny was enraged as the vigilantes immediately jumped and tried to restrain him. Unfortunately for them they had died before, unfortunately for them he was the king of the realms. Fortunately for Danny they had to listen to his commands. Danny stood up as the two vigilantes readied to attack along with the muscular man. The muscular man would be the easiest to control, giving him more energy to help Elle. Danny made eye contact with the muscular man, as soon as he did the man's eyes glowed green. Danny then did something he hated, he gave the dead an order.
"Restrain and hold them still."
And with that the muscular man attacked the two smaller vigilantes. They yelled and cried as the muscular man attacked them but Danny had tuned them out. He had to focus on Elle. Danny held out his palms in a sort of cup as green ectoplasm formed in his hands glowing brightly as all that came from the king did. He carefully allowed the liquid to drain down Elle's throat till the blood blossom effects had faded away. Danny didn't care about the Vigilantes yelling as he picked Elle up. Before going invisible and intangible again, he looked at the muscular man who looked at him with practically empty glowing greens eyes, Danny gave yet another order.
"You may release them in t minutes. Then you are also released"
Danny and Elle then both left, he would take her to the zone to heal properly.
âââââââââââ
Jason couldn't control himself. Jason couldn't fucking control himself. Jason was frozen, unable to move against the figure that just just appeared. As soon as that white haired.. Thing! Looked at him his vision filled with that awful green but it felt different this time. There was no uncontrollable, all consuming rage but a soft him of rage that waited for something.
Restrain and hold them still.
A voice? No a feeling maybe? broke through the buzzing, a calm voice that for some reason the pit listened to. Jason felt 2 figures in his hold, struggling to get away but unable to as he held them tight. The calm voice called again.
5 minutes
Jason held his grip as the voice counted down, as what he was holding struggled more.
4 minutes
Jason felt calm, calmer than he should have ever felt with the pit taking hold of him but for some reason.. This was so peaceful.
3 minutes
The smaller of the two he was holding had stopped struggling allowing Jason to change how he held it.
2 minutes
He began to hear the world again, barely. He could barely hear his brothers yelling at him.
1 minute
The world was slowly coming back as the green faded from his vision. Jason felt odd as he slowly let go of the brothers he was holding so firmly.
0 minutes
Jason was almost fully aware of the world around him as gently placed down his brother. His head was spinning and the world felt fuzzy. What had happened? Dick was there? Dick was slowly tapping on his arm, a soft grounding rhythm that Jason could match his breathing to. What had happened? What was going on??
âââââââââ
"It took Danielle, we need to go after her!" Damian got up quickly as soon as he was let go. Damian immediately began to look for how that person got in without setting off their alarms. As well as any clues of where they went. Tim was on the floor gasping for air as Steph looked after him. Whatever had made Jason restrain them made him restrain the two of them with the same amount of force. That was fine for Damian and his tiny stature but for Tim Jason was practically squeezing the life out of him till he adjusted his hold.
Duke and Cass were trying to find where the figure went and where he had taken the girl, Barbara was looking at security cameras, and Bruce in all his Batman Glory was immediately checking on all of them he was their father after all. Then came the report from the 2 of them.
Tim had hit his emergency Beacon first, then when he was being choked by his big brother in some sort of mind control haze, he just kept pressing the button hoping the others would get there before he passed out. Damian had hit his after struggling for a bit only making the grip tighter and Tim wheeze.
They both froze as they watched the figure summon Lazarus water in their hands. Then they both struggled and yelled more as it poured the water down the girl's throat. Was that why it had taken control of Jay? Did it have control over those damned pits? The figure never even addressed them just sent Jason to keep them out of the way before disappearing. That thing wasn't human. That thing was dangerous to their family. That thing was going to get the hell out of Gotham before it could possibly hurt any of Bruce's kids. He won't let that happen not again.
They'll look into this creature tonight for now Bruce needs to make sure his boys will be safe.
âââââââ
Danny mostly unaware of the chaos he had just caused for the bats shoves up at the Far Frozen holding a still unconscious Elle. Frostbite began treatment of her almost immediately, but even still they'd have a few days before Elle would be stable and conscious again. Danny could cover his little sister's absence for a few days. He can cover her absence for a few days, that should be fine. It's not like they were currently being hunted for.
#dc x dp#danny phantom#dcu#batman#the robins#tim drake#dick grayson#damian wayne#jason todd#king phantom#saw a thing about danny being able to control ghost/ectoplasm because of the whole being king thing and I'd thought it'd be fun to use#the batfam is all going to have a collective panic attack because WTF
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Grishaverse/Ketterdam dashboard simulator
đŞ Barrelrat1877 follow
just spilled my drink on a Fierdan's boots and now he's threatening to duel me. Should I call the stadwatch??? I'm lowkey scared.
#guys please help me
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đŚ Dregsconfessionsofficial follow
SUBMISSION: Last night I was walking around the barrel and I saw dirtyhands petting a dog. Like I'm not even joking, no gloves and all. And it was one of those crusty white ones.
#submission #omg I hope he washes his hands??? # those dogs are so crusty
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đ tidesofthecanals follow
Final results from 672 votes
â ď¸ kvasandass follow
Razorgulls stop sending anon hate to op over a poll challenge, level impossible, no glue no borax.
#i hope they get caught for tax fraud
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đ thislittlelife follow
A drawing my talented daughter made of Sankta Alina. We pray to her each night đđđ
đž magic-tricks follow
46.244.29.14
đ thekingofravkaishot follow
hello??? Omg. Why would you dox someone just like that??? This is literally putting them in danger. It's just a sweet mother with her child, who posted a drawing. What is wrong with you.
đľď¸ krugebythedozen follow
Op admitted to lying like a year ago about how they don't actually have a kid, but took the post down. It's probably a dime lion trying to troll us like they did in mass when sankta alina died. Also, respectfully, shut up. You posts thirst traps and long drawn out texts on how the king of ravka is "babygirlâ. Go get help.
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đ¤ theholyhandofghezenofficial follow
To the citizen who spread a highly damaging rumor that we were hosting a petting zoo inside the church, please come to talk to us. You are not in danger, but words will be exchanged. Lots of trouble was caused due to careless behavior.
âď¸ ketterdamfails follow
Womp womp
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đ justapigeon follow
Hey guys. Sorry I haven't been able to update my Pekka Rollins x Jan van eck fanfic. I've been searching for my mom for almost a week since she ran away after hearing that you had to get a vaccine for Firepox after the last outbreak. (She believes in praying to the saints.)
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đŞ eatthemerchs follow
I hate all of you. Why is this website making Kaz Brekker a soft boy when he literally MURDERS PEOPLE. No, he won't cry if you hug him. No he doesn't want to pet your dog. He'll take your eye out.
Stop romanticizing crime, all of you are sick.
(I am TIRED of the dog memes. Brekker is a crime boss. Why would any of you think he'd even care about your dog.)
đž magic-tricks follow
Your border collie is nice. But your chihuahua barks too much.
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đŚ northerstaverner follow
literally just saw some tall ass guy with a huge gun, a revolver and the brightest outfit l've ever seen, trot past my window??? In broad daylight??? Like oh my god. It felt like looking at a stork who made a wish he was human. His clothes were purple and green. Who wears that. Like, iconic. But still.
đ° jeepsteristhebestshot follow
But was he handsome
đŚ northerstaverner follow
He was built like a stork.
đ° jeepsteristhebestshot follow
But was he handsome???
đŚ northerstaverner follow
I'm not answering that... who is this.
đ§sugarandredribbons follow
Op answer
âď¸ theweststavesucksass follow
Op we all want to know
𫵠isthisbarrelbossproblematic follow
OP THIS IS AN URGENT MATTER
đŤdmitrithekerchman follow
OPPPPP
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#six of crows#dashboard simulator#fake dashboard#kaz brekker#jesper fahey#inej ghafa#kaz x inej#jan van eck#pekka rollins#ketterdam#nina zenik#matthias helvar#wylan hendriks#wylan van eck#nikolai lantsov#alina starkov#art#grishaverse#the grisha series#crooked kingdom#kaz dirtyhands brekker#the wraith#soc#rule of wolves
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Witches
Tw:Stabbing/SH
You couldnât have let your girlfriend Elphaba go to The Emerald City to meet the wizard of Oz all by herself. And your worry proved to be true as the wizard only wished to use her power,Eplhaba revealing that he couldn't even read the spell book let alone have any magical abilities himself. Elphaba was concerned by getting out of there and dragged you through the corridors with her into a tower. Barring the door which wouldn't last but would buy you time. Running up the stairs to the top,using a spell to create a flying broom. She extended her hand to you âLetâs goâ But before you could take her hand you were pulled backwards by the guards. Struggling against the guards as you reached out for Elphaba but you couldnât fight them off.Â
âNo, leave her alone, she hasnât done anything wrong. Iâm the one you want, Iâm the one you want, itâs me!â You struggled as you were held back by the guards.Â
"Elphaba!" you cried out her name. Her eyes were full of despair as she looked back and forth between you and the men holding you. Tears streamed down her face, she desperately looked for a way to get you out.
"Go!" You shouted, she shook her head, looking at you like you said the most ridiculous thing in the world. She couldnât just leave you, you were her girlfriend, and she would never forgive herself if something bad happened to you because of her.She was torn, she wanted to stay and fight so you could be safe, but she knew the only way you would be safe for sure was if she fled.Â
"I'll be fine,go!" Tears streamed down her face,she was worried what could happen to you once she left. She didnât trust The Wizard, she knew he was a vile old man that did not care who he hurt to get what he wanted. But this was her only chance to escape him and she had to take it
"I'll be fine" you promised,she wanted to believe you too but she couldnât help but still worry. She hated leaving you behind, and she knew that she would never forgive herself if anything bad happened to you. "Go" you said but this time it was a whisper. She turned to leave, not daring to look back because if she did, she knew sheâd never be able to leave
The wizard immediately tossed you into a dungeon,locked up with no chance of escaping.You are tossed unceremoniously into a dark, damp cell and shut in with heavy iron bars. You are now left alone in the cold, dark room with nothing to do but wait for whatever the Wizard had planned for you
Several days later you were brought before the Wizard,Elphaba had resurfaced and started to wreak havoc across the land. The wizard fully aware you were her only weakness and intended to use you against her. You were forced to your knees before the fraud of a wizard.
âAh, look what we have here. The green girlâs love interest. Such a pretty thing to use against her, donât you think?â He said with a smirk
"I'll never help you,I'll never hurt her"
âOh, I think you will. Elphaba values you very much, and sheâll do anything for you. So yes, you will give me what I want, whether you like it or notâ He snapped his fingers and one of the guards grabbed you by your hair, forcing you to look up at The Wizard. He held your chin in his hand, his eyes narrowed as he leered down at you âYou donât have a choice in the matter. You see, Elphaba has become quite the nuisance as of late, and I need her stopped, by any means necessary. So, if you cooperate with me, you might have a chance at surviving thisâ You were sent up to her castle with one mission from the wizard,kill her or you die.Â
You made your way into the castle, the sound of your footsteps echoing through the empty halls.It was silent and cold. You looked around, the sight of the place abandoned, made you feel even worse about what you had to do.
"Elphaba" you called out,"it's me" You call out into the silence, your voice echoing off the stone walls. There is no response at first, but then slowly, from somewhere ahead. You could hear a faint sound, the shuffling of footsteps against the floor. The footsteps get louder as Elphaba steps out of the shadows, a look of confusion mixed with surprise on her face. She stops suddenly as soon as she sees you, her eyes going wide with shock. You ran up and wrapped your arms around her,she froze for a moment but then quickly returned the embrace. She holds onto you tightly, like sheâs afraid you might vanish any secondÂ
"I'm so relieved you're okay. I was worried sick theyâd hurt you. I was so scared Iâd never see you againâŚâ She put her palm against your cheek for a moment before she buried her face in your neck as she cried. You comforted her,one hand on her back tracing circles as the other clutching the knife you were given. It was a beautiful moment, but it was over all too soon as you shifted and she felt the cold, sharp edge of the knife against her skin. She knew what was coming. She knew what you had to do, and yet she couldnât help the tears that flooded out of her eyes.
"I'm sorry,he's forcing me to do this" tears streamed down your face.
âNo, darling, no. I-I understand, itâs not your fault, just⌠I trust youâ
"I-I Elphaba it's either you or me" your hand was shaking.
âI know. I know, darling. I love you, you know that right? You have to do thisâ She held your hand,steadying you. The knife you were given was enchanted and it would only set you free when it came in contact with blood.
âJust⌠promise me one thingâŚâ Elphaba could feel your hand shaking as she took it in hers, steadying it slightly. She looked into your eyes, tears flowing down her cheeks. Elphaba knew what was about to happen, and even though it was going to kill her, she wasnât scared. She trusted you, and thatâs all that mattered right now. You looked up at her,meeting her eyes.
âPlease donât blame yourself. This isnât your fault, okay? None of this is your fault, remember thatâ In one move you twisted the knife and plugged it into yourself. She was frozen in place for a moment as she realized what she did.
âNo-no, oh no, NO!â Elphaba was frozen for a split second, completely stunned by what just happened. You looked up at her.
"I I couldn't do it"Â
âYou- you chose death over hurting me. You-â She could hardly believe it. You had chosen to die rather than hurt her, even if it meant your own life. She looked at you with tears streaming down her face, completely overwhelmed. She never thought someone would care about her so much, that she was worth such a sacrifice. It was too much to wrap her head around. Elphaba grabbed her spell book immediately, frantically flipping through pages, trying to find a spell that would heal you. Her hands were shaking as she desperately searched for a solution, knowing that every second counted. Finally finding one,without a second thought, she started saying the incantation, letting the magical energy flow through her as she desperately hoped it was enough,and the spell worked,she pulled out the knife and your skin closed itself around the wound. She held onto you tightly, her body trembling with emotion. For a minute she couldnât even speak, all she could do was hold you and let out the occasional sob of relief. She had never been so afraid in her life, and the thought of losing you was almost too unbearable to think about.âYouâd really sacrifice your life just to save me?â She looked at you with tear-filled eyes, taking in every detail of your face, as though trying to memorize every line and freckle. She reached out and gently brushed a strand of hair out of your eyes.
"I love you,of course I would"
âI-I donât even know what to say to that! I donât deserve you, youâre too good to me, darlingâ
"Don't expect me to do that again,it hurt like a bitch" you joked,trying desperately to make her laugh.Elphaba let out a snort of laughter, and then suddenly she was laughing for real, a mixture of relief, amusement and amazement, and she couldnât seem to stop.
âOh, I-I wouldnât ask you to do that again even if my life depended on it! And donât think I donât know youâre trying to make me laughâ
"You're cute when you laugh"
âOh, stop it. I am not cute. Iâm supposed to be the scary witchâ
"Oh,sorry you now have a reputation to uphold" you joked again,struggling to sit up.She reached out and helped you sit up, a mixture of concern and amusement in her eyes.Â
âYes, thatâs right. I canât allow myself to get a reputation as a gentle, kind witch. I have a fearsome image to maintain!â
"I guess I'll have to uphold that too,as your.." you pulled your shirt down to show off your necklace which was a chain with a black ring around it. You hoped she'd realize what you meant.
"You... You really want to marry me...?"
âI practically killed myself for you,I think if anything that proves my love for you"
"I suppose it does, yes. I⌠I still canât believe everything youâve done for me. You never cease to astound me" Elphabaâs heart melted a bit at your words. She reached out and touched the necklace gently, a soft smile on her face
"So is that a yes?"
âOf course itâs a yes, you fool. I would never say no"
#elphaba thropp x reader#elphaba imagine#elphaba x reader#elphaba thropp#wlw#wlw fanfic#wicked fanfiction#wicked#wicked x reader#wicked wlw
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Guys, I am begging you. Please please please please please PLEASE do NOT vote 3rd party, or not vote at all.
I get it. I really do. Bidenâs handling of Israel has been, not gonna mince words, dogshit. Abominable. Unspeakably bad.
But we cannot afford to protest like this.
We donât need Biden as president. We do need to keep Trump out of office. And to those who respond âwell, I donât want just the lesser of two evils,â please, for the love of god, grow the fuck up.
For one, why wouldnât you want the lesser of two evils. It is, by definition, LESS EVIL.
âWhy canât we just have no evil, why isnât that an option.â I really wish it was. Just as much as you. But itâs not. These are our cards, and we have to play our hand to the best of our ability.
Which brings us to two.
Trump is more evil. Like, so much more evil. Weâre comparing apples and oranges here guys.
I understand that a lot of you might doubt that. The largest demographic of people advocating for third party or non-votes are in the 18-26 range. New voters, with one or no elections under their belt.
So they donât remember.
Most of us (I myself fall under this age range) donât remember 2016. The election, that is. They donât remember how so many people protested Hillary vs Trump by going 3rd party or writing in joke votes, because they saw the two as equally bad. And Trump won.
Half of us donât remember the Trump presidency. Weâve heard he was a weird, bad, bigoted president, but donât fully grasp the scope of how bad.
So off the top of my head, here are some highlights of real things Donald Trump did while he held office.
- threw toilet paper at hurricane victims like he was trying to shoot a 3-pointer
- fired the man investigating him for election fraud
- called African countries âshitholesâ
- appointed members of the Supreme Court who would go on to overturn roe v wade
- stole classified documents from the white house to hide at his resort
- tried to instate a Muslim Ban
- incited a insurrection to try and keep himself in office, and maybe hang his VP if there was time
- looked directly at an eclipse. Like no glasses, full on.
- fueled covid conspiracies. Also told people to âdrink bleachâ to fight the virus
- withdrew us from the Paris Climate Accord
- cofefe. Remember that? What a fun, normal thing for the president to tweet at 2am.
- employed literal white supremacists
- called Naziâs âvery fine peopleâ
- got endorsed by the KKK, and refused to condemn David Duke
And thatâs just what I can remember right now.
So if youâre angry at Biden about Palestine, please please please do not think for a fucking second Trump would be better. He would almost certainly actively be worse. He would give Netanyahu the green light. If you think Biden has used a loose leash, at least itâs some kind of leash. Trump would be all in. Full chips, flying to the Middle East to send in the bombs himself.
If youâre still hesitant, consider this last plea.
Things are bad. These shouldnât be the only two choice we have, but they are. You canât look at the menu, which is offering either bland soup someone spit in or actual rat poison and go âcould I have some steakâ.
You can order the soup and live to write a one-star review on Yelp, maybe call health inspections on the restaurant or contact the owners and say âyou guys know your menu has only two options and theyâre both dogshit. If you donât add more, youâll be unemployed soon.â
Or you can order rat poison and die.
If we elect Donald Trump in the fall, we will be eating rat poison. He has repeatedly said himself to be in favor of a dictatorship. He quotes Hitler. If he is put in office, the change we all want and so critically need will not be fucking POSSIBLE. Because with Biden, itâll be hard, and tedious, and long, and exhausting, but at least it will be goddamn possible.
So, come November, please donât order the rat poison.
Please just eat your shitty ass soup so we can live to get really angry about it.
Please.
#gaza#usa#politics#2024 elections#trump#biden administration#joe biden#israel#social justice#election 2024
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This is a very sleep deprived thoughtâand I don't actually believe it, per seâbut.
I've seen a lot of people who are deeply unsatisfied with the retcon of it being Agatha that bound Jen's magic. Mainly, because it felt like shoe-honing. Especially since Agatha made such a point about going out of her way to not kill Jen despite hating her, because she respected her work too much.
I think many interesting discussions can be had about this. I've talked about this beforeâthe fact that Jen's character felt sort of neglected in the finale, and the fact a lot of people struggled to connect with her prior to rewatches. (I myself didn't have this problem, but still, my criticisms are still of the same nature-)
So anyway, Agatha probably chose to bind Jen to keep her out of the way, not realising the weight of that, the intersectionalityâperhaps not caring about the suggesting very much at all. Because, you're a midwife, Jen. You can still do good. You will do good, just out of my way. And I truly do believe this is how it went.
But what if Agatha hadn't been the one to bind her? What if, in a brief moment of clarity, Agatha locked in to get everyone out? Her movements are always supposed to be calculated, so is carelessness really in her repertoire?
Maybe, just maybe, she heard Jen say that, âI'll be damned if I let one of you two idiots die,â and that triggered her. Maybe because of prideâgod knows she was overwhelmed before the final trial and all her walls had come right back up. But the same didn't apply to Jennifer. She had actually changed. Jen had actually re-discovered her worth. She'd remembered who she was, power or not. She was someone Agatha respected in spite of the resentment. Someome who heals, nurtures, helps, does good. Not the vain, surface-level, self-serving fraudâwho had previously been on a dark path too similar to Agatha's own, so close to complete cynicism. Lilia had saved Jen from that path and oushed her to be the path ahead. The Obstacles? Agatha.
And Agatha won't accept Jen's helpânot after what happened to Alice, which to Agatha's & Billy's eyes alike stands as evidence of the fact she is a monster. She won't even accept to acknowledge her own character development, as a mere episode ago she jumped in front of a sword to save Lilia. She won't, above all, acknowledge that Jen has grown to care about her. Instead, she will do everything tomake that kdea crumble. She will destroy it.
All she needs to do is shape the narrative Billy truly thinks is true, and so it can become the truth. Billy, who created the condition in which it was possible for Alice to break her generational curse. Who found the spirits of Evanora and Nicky alike. All the trials were his limited understanding of the coven & of witch folk. (Jen's was right out of her vision board, she looked like one of her clientsânothing like the rootworker midwife we know she used to be. Alice's is in the seventies, which mathematically makes no sense with her age as she would have been born in the eighties to be the age she is on 2025âbut Billy based everything about her trial on Lorna, because that's what he was familiar with. Agatha's mind he couldn't readâall he knew about her was that something happened to her son. So he puts a grown woman in children's clothing, to force therapy on herâand she regresses into the hurt little girl she was at the stake. Lilia, whose mind is the loudest & most easily accessible to Billy, had the most personalised trial, but even then, it latches onto the witch stereotypes that she so desperately hates. All of those do help the girlsâminus Agathaâbut still don't fully represent them. As for the green witch trial, well, it took him a while to cook it up, because he just found out Rio is death. Anyway, I digressâ) My point being, if you can shape Billy's understanding of a situation, you can have some power over what happens. (One trial for each witch, the public transport system, etc.)
Would it be such an impossible stretch to say Agatha painted herself as the villain once more, embracing the part presented to her, the oart most familiar, the oart she knows best to simultaneously reject Jen's offered sisterhood/peace/altruism AND make sure the road gave Jen her powers back? She gets Jen out of the wayâgo do good again, just out of my wayâbecause she's hellbent on the narrative that Agatha Harkness can't be anything but a covenless witch.
And what's the next thing she does, after assuring Billy that the road took Jen to safety after giving her what she wants?
She tries to get what she wants, because she knows Billy is in no real danger in his own road. Give me a little power-boost, dungeon master, get me out of here, come on. But he doesn't trust her. And if he doesn't trust herâshe can't possibly convince him to willingly hand himself over to Rio.
So she gives him what he needs, what he wants from the road. She guides himâcradles his head and helps him fight the guilt, she helps him save Tommy. The second abomination that Lady Death was trying to prevent has already been re-born, but Rio's too busy playing mother-knows-best in suburbia on Agatha's rooftop.
So Agatha gets Billy out, accepts that, âsometimes boys die,â that death herself can't be blamed for Nickyâshe forgives Rioâand starts to mourn herself. She's gotten Jen & Billy out. She can stay here and die the villain. But the road presents her with the opportunity to liveâfrom death, lifeâ(she also realises right then that Nicky was also Rio's, btw)âand she makes her dramatic exit. The rest is... A different post.
#agatha all along#agatha harkness#jennifer kale#billy maximoff#billy kaplan#lilia's leggings#agatha all along analysis
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love is not a walk in the park*ŕłŕź
"when something that should be a walk in the park feels like a maze for the feline and canineâat least it's beautiful, serene, and sunny!"
warning; from the blackcat!Y/n series, the parts don't need to be read in order!
a/n: reuploaded from old to new account
.ă . ⢠â . ° .⢠°:. *â ° . â
It was the gentle breeze that pushed the clouds to move, the way there was a faint buzz of bees in the distance, the scent of green grass and soil and the presence of two suns that brought Y/n a serene feeling within her.Â
It was as if she was alone, but not lonely because, despite their different nature, Yunjin brought her something she had been missing.
That feeling of inadequacy became faint.Â
The words in her book didnât hold a deeper meaning than her being able to live one life and during that one life being able to feel warmth on her skin despite sitting in the shadow of the tree.Â
This was the most normal her life had ever felt which was ironic considering people would disagree because she was an idol. It was though, because she hadnât been able to live her life more freely than now even with certain restrictions that came with fame and the need to keep a neat image.Â
Yunjin basked in the sun where half of the blanket wasâthe other in the shadow where Y/n satâthese moments were the most peaceful ones she had. In a hectic life, as a person who indulged in the hectic with her energetic personality, Yunjin appreciated that she had Y/n to balance that out for her.Â
The scent of cinnamon and benzoin was one she associated with serenity; Y/nâs scent reminded her of how she could wind down at times.Â
There was a certain flow to the way her pen moved along the pages of the notebook as she scribbled down lyrics. Those songs she would brush off as silly, knowing she would never release them, that were, at times, about the feline her eyes would glance at now and then.Â
What exactly were they about? Yunjin couldnât figure that out, she couldnât pinpoint what it was that she described when writing about someone she could write books about. It left her lost, but she kept chasing after the only thing her mind could think of; Y/n.
She wanted to state that she knew Y/n the best which still wasnât as deeply as some would think that it was. However, Yunjin unlike others was able to figure out Y/nâs disguise; the girl always told one-fourth of a whole story and while the rest took it for the complete version the girl knew that there was more.Â
Pretty eyes worn as a disguise.Â
She looked up from the notebook and at Y/n who was leaning her back against Yunjinâs side for leverage.Â
What exactly was it that she felt for her? So much, too much to simply put it into words, but it surely did make it easier to get words out on paper.
The feline was the perfect muse; Yunjinâs muse.
However, Y/n remained a mystery Yunjin loved being around.Â
âWhat if we made a song together?âÂ
She casually put it out there, not thinking much of it as she mindlessly doodled on the page, underlining certain words.Â
It wouldnât only get them closer as she would get to spend more time with Y/n, but the girl beside her was amazing with her words. Yunjin would be able to learn; Y/n was highly lyrical and expressed herself in artistic ways Yunjin had yet to grasp.Â
âWhat?âÂ
Y/n put the bookmark between the pages before she closed the book, her eyes didnât leave the cover though. Nerves and uneasiness washed over her at the suggestion, her fingers traced along the outlines of the book in her hands, not being able to comprehend why Yunjin would want to write a song with her. Scared that she would get exposed for the fraud she felt like she was in a place she was supposed to fit into, but never felt like she did.Â
âI mean we donât have to release it, but just work on something together like a side project for fun.â
Yunjin shrugged and shifted in her place to turn to Y/n who sat up straight.Â
âWhy would you want to do that?â
âWhy wouldnât I?â
That wasnât the problem that Y/n saw with it, there were many.
âI mean as in; why with me when there are better options?â
The problem was that the girl felt like she was the least sought-after option and Yunjin would acknowledge her for the con that she was. Y/n was sure that she lacked, especially among all these other talented people. She stood out like a sore thumb and for all the wrong reasons; the feline did her best to stay hidden. She didnât fit in a crowd of people who were talented when there were so many things she could do and have done so much better.Â
She had achieved such high things in life, but was that enough? Was she enough? No way. All that she had done, Y/n could have done better, couldnât she?
âAre you kidding?â
No, Y/n wasnât kidding and she wasnât going to entertain it either as she rolled her eyes and looked back down at her book, opening it again. Yunjin knew just how to make everything melt in the end and Y/n didnât like that; no, it wasnât that she didnât like that; she just didnât understand how Yunjin always managed to do it.
She was so confused about what it was that drew her to Yunjin. She just knew that it was a want; a need. Y/n wasnât fond of that, especially as someone who had always been independent; she did not want to possibly become even slightly dependent on someone. She could simply ignore her emotions like she always did by occupying herself and pretending that she didnât need Yunjin when it came to certain things.Â
Yunjin smiled, putting down her pen as she huffed and moved to lie down on her back. Her smile didnât disappear as she loved seeing the feline, who puffed up her fur at moments like these, melt into a puddle just for her. She loved not only the puddle Y/n could be, but she also loved her for the pompous behaviour and the person she was.
Was that it?
Despite her eyes being glued to the words she wasnât able to read them and she let Yunjin put her head in her lap. Y/n was doing her best to try and ignore her canine, but it was hard to ignore the sun when it was beaming right at her.Â
âY/n, youâre the most competent person I know when it comes to music, especially when it comes to writing lyrics.â
The book got gently moved out of the way, Yunjin being able to see more than the cover as she looked over Y/nâs face and now met her eyes. She was aware that Y/n appreciated compliments, she could see how they worked as reassurance to her feline who she knew was insecure on the inside despite the confident and cold facade.Â
Yunjin was always there for the girl; she was a loyal life-long companion for her feline.Â
Still, words alone wouldnât melt away a facade like hers, but Yunjin managed to do it with more than just words. She did it by simply being herself and it left Y/n confused; lost in something that sounded like an easy walk in the park but was like a maze with continuous dead ends.Â
âHow would you know?â
Comically Yunjin pushed the book back, blocking their sight of each other as she looked off into the distance of the park.Â
The green grass gently blew with the wind, the sun beamed strongly and warmed her skin, and the whistle together with the rattling of the branches and leaves above them filled the momentary silence.
However, Y/n put it down onto the blanket they were on and looked at Yunjin with raised eyebrows. As far as Y/n knew she hadnât shared any of the lyrics she had written and had yet to agree to help with the lyrics for their group's songs. The fear of being caught was too immense.
âI mightâve stumbled upon some papersââ âYunjin.â Y/n groaned and Yunjin cowered, ducking her head at the bookmark that she was smacked in the head with.Â
âTo be fair, you gave me your book to read and it just fell out.â She defended with a squeak, peeking up at Y/n with her lower lip now jutted out.Â
Y/n heaved a sigh and reclined, lying down on the blanketâYunjinâs head still resting on her lapâand she stared at the tree above them. The green leaves swayed with the light wind and the sky peeked through the cracks of the branches. She closed her eyes when the sun managed to seep through the cracks and held them closed for a while as her mind started to work a shift.
At the silence Yunjin moved, sitting up and turning to look at Y/n. There was something overly serene about the feline when she looked at her. The bright ray of sun splayed across her face and her dark hair glimmered in the light as she lay with her eyes closed.Â
Was it the sun? Yunjin could feel her face heat up at the ethereal view of her feline so comfortable in the open field.
She pulled her knees up to her chest, hugging and resting her chin on them while staring at Y/n. The canine knew she could spend a whole day just looking at the cat-like girl in front of her.Â
Her head tilted slightly to the side, âY/nâŚâ Yunjin carefully started and got a hum in return, watching the hues of the sun reflect on Y/nâs skin. âYouâre not mad that I did, are you?â She warily asked because the last thing in the world that she wanted was to make Y/n upset with her. It wasnât difficult to get Y/n annoyedâYunjin was awareâbut it was difficult to get her upset and angry.
It was extremely rare to see Y/n angry. Matter of fact over the past few years sheâs only seen her angry once.
That was enough not to want to see more.
Yunjin held her breath when Y/n blinked her eyes open, squinting slightly at the bright light and her eyes glimmered like water did in the sun. Water Yunjin wanted to dive right into and swim in for an eternity.Â
She stared at the girl who looked like a puppy that had been kicked to the curb. It was simply impossible to get upset with Yunjin. It made Y/n purse her lips for a second, the only person she was upset with was herself for being like ice cream in the sun when it came to her companion.Â
Y/n exhaled, trying to cool off, but it was impossible when Yunjinâs big doe-like eyes stared at her like the sun. âNo, Iâm not.â The girl annoyedly admitted and the latter visibly perked up at the words, excitement evident because knowing that her feline wasnât upset with her brightened her whole world which was filled with butterflies she loved to chase for the feeling.Â
âOkay, and Iâm sorryâŚIt just happened to fall out and I didnât know what it was at first so I read it thinking those were notes for the book.â
âI know you wouldnât read if you knew, itâsfine.âÂ
Yunjin nodded as she manoeuvred around and lay on her stomach beside Y/n, resting her chin in her palm. Their eyes met as they stared at each other in yet another silence. It felt like a contest when in reality it was simply because neither of them wanted to look away. There wasnât anything better to stare at in the end.
âWill you make a song with me then?â She at last repeated her question, but in a much smaller voice as if to not startle the girl.
Y/n broke their eye contact, but only to reach into her bag. Yunjin watched as Y/n blindly rummaged through it before she took out what she was looking for.
âHere, letâs look for some inspiration.â Yunjin happily grabbed one airpod and plopped down onto her back beside Y/n who opened her phone.Â
âDo you haveââ Y/n didnât get to finish her sentence as Yunjin spoke up, âgenuine love, like when you know that youâve genuinely fallen in love because you are confused about why you fell in love in the first place.âÂ
The feline lolled her head to the side, coming face to face with Yunjin whose wide eyes gazed at her, a pink tint resting on the canineâs cheeks.
âYouâre awfully clichĂŠ at times, you know?â
âLove is a clichĂŠ we canât escape though, isnât it?âÂ
âUnfortunately.â Y/n agreed and moved closer to the girl, resting her head on Yunjinâs shoulder so they could both look at her phone and be closer.Â
The two didnât need much inspiration though when they had each other.
.ă . ⢠â . ° .⢠°:. *â ° . â
#yunjin imagines#yunjin fluff#yunjin x reader#yunjin x female reader#le sserafim x fem reader#le sserafim x reader#le sserafim imagines#le sserafim fluff#girl group imagines#fanfic#girl group fluff#blackcat!y/nđââŹ
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If lawmakers are serious about fighting climate change, they must design climate-friendly legislation that cannot be exploited by anti-development activists.
I don't know how to tell you thisâŚ
Any attempt to mark some essential distinction between âlegitimateâ environmentalists and âantiâdevelopment activistsâ is bound to fail. Anyone who has read through the controversies of the 1960s and 1970s â for instance @atoms4ca here on Tumblr â can tell you that the opposition to nuclear energy, the defining characteristic of the Green movement, the one thing they are unwilling to give up, even in the face of the threat of climate catastrophe? Was founded on the desire to deny industrial civilization a sustainable energy source.
Itâs NIMBY all the way down. The founders of âFriends of the Earthâ looked at California and though âit would be awful if more people were here, and this State canât support more people without electricity, and nuclear is the only reasonable option to supply that, so letâs oppose it.â Simple as that. And the Sierra Club, which had been saying âAtoms not Damsâ, trying to accommodate development with minimal harm to the environment, saw money flowing to these radicals, and followed suit.
The CEQA process, just like the NEPA process, has been from the beginning and is being abused, because it was created to be abusable. There are few or no scientific or other objective standards attached to the Environmental Impact Statement process, and the ânull hypothesisâ alternative presented is generally a completely unrealistic one. âWhat happens if we donât allow this power plant, or mine, or other projectâ is typically answered with ânothingâ, not with an acknowledgement that the power, or minerals, or whatever will have to come from somewhere.
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His Mayoral Duties
âMayor Bradley! How do you feel now that youâve just won a second term in office with a surprise landslide victory?!â A man with a microphone asked.
âIâm honored the people of Stocksville have chosen me to lead them again. Iâm excited to get back in my office and make changes for the better.â The man confidently said, adjusting his casual yet sleek blue suit. He combed over his curls with his hand to make sure they werenât frizzled.
��Mayor! To what do you contribute to such a meaningful success?â A blonde woman in a red suit nearly jumped out of the crowd. She, of course, was talking about how a black man, like himself, was the first to win a reelection as mayor in Stocksville.
âI think my policies speak for themselves. Our economy is doing better, crime is at an all time low and people are content with their lives in the city.â The mayor confidently responded.
âAnd mayor, what do you have to say to those who believe your victory was the result of fraud?â A man asked before being pushed back into the crowd.
If the people had known him personally, or had studied his body language, they wouldâve known Scott staggered for a brief moment before responding. âI ask that they wait for the voting office to put out their data, and, for now, work with me in making progress towards a better Stocksville.â He smiled.
âHow could they have known?! I was completely certain it would be a secret-â A man with shaggy brown hair walked back and forth before being interrupted by Scott.
âJust shut up! I know my office isnât rigged with cameras or mics Iâm not aware of. Thereâs no way it couldâve gotten out.â He said, leaning forward onto his desk.Â
âThen how would they have known we used dark ma-â Scott almost literally zipped the manâs lips this time.
âRoger. There is absolutely, assuredly, zero reason for people to believe we did anything suspicious other than their own conspiratorial beliefs. We have done nothing wrong, and thereâs no proof otherwise.â
Roger wiped the sweat from his neck, âWellâŚâ
Scott glared, âRoger.â
âIâm not saying I kept the book, but-â
âRoger!â Scott growled. A rarity for him.
âWhat if I need a demon for a hot chick or something? You never know.â Roger, now much more casually, admitted.
âIf by âdemonâ you mean âadviceâ then sure, but you definitely donât mean what you said literally, right?â Scott said, with a thick emphasis on the sarcasm.
âRelax Brandon, thereâs nothing to worry about. Iâm like, ninety-nine percent sure thereâs no negative side effects.â Roger started, âYou did do what the de- what the advice told you to do, right?â
Brandon sighed, pulling out the greasy takeout bag, âYeah, I bought a burger after I won. I really donât get how this was equivalent to whatever thatâŚadvice did.âÂ
He took a large bite out of the burger, finding the taste divine. Scott quickly took another, and then a sip of his soda.
âWoah, slow down their champ. Just because you won doesnât mean you canât get sick from eating like that.â Roger advised, but it seemed Brandon wasnât listening.
âMmph, sorry,â Scott swallowed the last of his burger, âI donât know why, but that was the best burger Iâve ever had from McTasties.â Finishing his soda and the fries, Scott went on, âI think Iâm gonna get another. They mustâve changed their recipe or something!âÂ
Roger noticed how Scott wiped the grease onto his blue suit, which, thanks to the dark color, didnât detract much from it. However, he thought back to how Brandon got pissed off when he spilled water onto a similar suit.Â
âYeah, Iâm gonna head home. Call me if you need anything not politics related.â Roger said, the drawstrings of his green and gray hoodie flipping through the air.Â
Despite his calm demeanor, Roger was still thinking about his friendâs behavior. Just what was it that they had summoned the night before?
âDestiny! Two more orders of McTasties double cheeseburgers. One with fries and one with onion rings. Of course I want two milkshakes!â Scott said over his newly installed desk microphone. He had gotten tired of constantly walking down to ask her to order him more food.Â
âRight away Mayor Bradley. Oh, city council wanted me to notify you that theyâre meeting for ordinance 5507 in 10 minutes.â Destiny replied.
Scott smiled and thanked Destiny. He slowly sat up from his chair and walked over to his mirror. His stomach bulged against the white undershirt and blue suit he adorned. A ketchup stain marked the white and a grease one the blue suit. It had been a stressfulâŚ2 weeks in office. Scott hadnât taken the time to think about how he had gained weight so quickly, or how fast time had gone by.Â
Regardless, Scott decided to head down to the council room and wait for his colleagues there.Â
Opening his doors, he found an unwanted surprise.
âScott! I really need to talk to you ri-â Roger nearly shouted.
âCan it wait? I have McTasties and a council meeting waiting for me downstairs?â Scott replied, rolling his eyes.
âI really donât think you should. Iâm not sure how much longer you have?â Roger panicked, welcoming himself into Scottâs office.
Raising an eyebrow, Scott now fully entered the conversation, âWhat, do I have a disease or something?â âYou might as well! You know that âadviceâ we summoned the other night?â Roger asked, using his hands to sign quotation marks in the air, âWell, apparently that deal was just its way to get ahold of you.â
âWait, you mean Iâm possessed?â Scott scoffed at his own words.
âBasically! Itâs like an infection,â Roger opened the book Scott had berated him for 2 weeks ago, âThe longer you donât treat it, the more it affects you. This weight youâve gained isnât natural.â Roger poked Scottâs belly to emphasize his point, Scott smacking his friendâs hand away.
âSo what, I've gained a few pounds. Iâve been stressed and cooped up in this office, Iâll be fine.â Scott said, stifling a belch.
Roger looked at his friend with glazed eyes, âYouâve barely done anything but eat McTasties and watched how the media is praising your election.â
Scott didnât want to admit it, but as he looked at the greasy takeout wrappers on the floor, Roger was right. He hadnât done much other than eat and pass a few laws that were already in the works before he was elected. But then, a lightbulb.
Well, a buzz on his desk microphone.
âMayor Bradley. City council is meeting in 5 minutes now. Also, your McTasties is here.â Destiny rang.
Now with a smug look, Scott smiled at Roger, âIâm actually in the process of passing a new city ordinance right now. And youâre making me late. Now if youâll excuse me.â
Scott then headed down the hall and towards the city council. Roger looked at the book and sighed. At least this wasnât going to ruin his life. He hoped.
Entering the city council meeting room with his two bags of McTasties, Scott settled in before the last of the council members arrived. Immediately digging into one of the cheeseburgers and fries, the other city council members stared in shock.Â
âUhm, Mayor Bradley. Mayor Bradley!â An older council member nearly shouted.
âHmm? What is it?â Scott replied, licking ketchup off of his fingers.
âWeâre starting our meetingâŚis it truly necessary for you to eat your lunch during our meeting?â The older man inquired.
âOh, Iâm almost done with it,â Scott casually replied, sucking down his milkshake, making a loud slurping sound in the process, âYou all should try it sometime. Now, where were we?âÂ
The following months saw historic change for Stocksville. Probably in the most insipid way possible. Ordinance 5507 gave more freedom to âinexpensive food companiesâ that was cited to help âimpoverish citizens attain a more consummate meal.âÂ
In reality, Scott just wanted more McTasties near city hall and his house, both of which now had 2 within a block.Â
Not that Scott walked to the fast food restaurant, but it certainly alleviated the weight on his employees. Though, it didnât relieve weight in other areas. Within those months, the Bradley office staff had all put on at least 70 pounds of fat. Dozens upon dozens of McTasties orders came to the office each day, a majority of them coming from Scott himself.Â
Speaking of the mayor, he had gone up 3 suit sizes in the several months following ordinance 5507, which of course was followed by ordinance 5508, 5509 and 5512. All of which gave the McTasties company more power in Stocksville.Â
None of this caused the Bradley office any concern because, like Scott, they had all become addicted to the greasy junk. Seemingly overnight, the town had transformed into some Las Vegas for greasy restaurants. A competitor, Pattyâs Burgers, was on the rise and produced even more restaurants for Scott- for the Stocksville citizens to order from.Â
Though, not all hope was lost for the town.
âScooooooottttt!â A man with shaggy brown hair shouted down the hall. The guards were too fat and lazy to stop him from bursting into Scottâs office. âScott, Iâve found out how to solve this- what the hell happened to you?!âÂ
The mayorâs first response with a burp, followed by him trying to sit upright in his chair.
âDo you mind, URP, Roger? Iâm trying to eat my pre-lunch snack?â Scott replied, taking a chomping bite out of a burger that looked much too large for human consumption. 3 more bags were filled with food next to him on the desk, Roger being able to tell they were filled because he couldnât take a step in the office without his legs brushing up against an empty one.
âHow fucking fat have you gotten? Do you realize what this is all from? That âadvice?ââ Roger, again, emphasized the word advice.
Scott slurped down a soda before literally dumping a carton of fries into his gaping maw. âWhat, the fucking demon? Yeah, whatever. Like anyone believes that shit.â He let out a very noticeable fart before going back to chowing down on a burger.
Roger noticed his friendâs new dialect. âDude, since when did you swear? I thought you had to uphold an image or something.âÂ
âYeah, what-fucking-ever. People are so happy with all the McTasties, and now Pattyâs! Who cares if I fucking swear!â Scott said with a little too much enthusiasm, finding himself wedged between his office chair, âDamn, this thing is getting old.â âUhh, yeah. Anyways, Iâve figured out how to stop all this and get back to normal. All you have to do is eat some vegetables and fruit, lose a bit of weight and the possession should slowly go away. If that doesnât work weâll need a priest and-â âBro, youâre actually still on this possession thing? I told you, Iâm in complete control.â Scott said, taking a final bite out of his burger.Â
Then, a squeak was heard, followed by a snap and then Scott falling to the ground. Rips could be heard behind the desk as the mayor sat behind his desk.
âFuckâŚthat actually felt kinda good.â Scott mumbled to himself.
Roger, however, was much more worried, âDude! Are you alright?!â He went behind Scottâs desk to help his friend up.
He immediately noticed that one of the buttons on his suit had burst off from the fall, leaving a portion of Scottâs belly wide open to the public. As he helped heft his friend up, Roger noticed that Scottâs pants were now torn at his thighs, exposing a significant amount of cellulite. After helping Scott up, the fat man waddled to the mirror in his office.Â
âDamn, I donât look too bad.â Scott admired himself. Roger hadnât taken the time to notice in his rush to save his friend, but as his friend looked on in the mirror, he really saw how far Scottâs appearance had fallen. The once well-shaved man now had a scruff that was forming a goatee, and the same furry situation could be said for his now-exposed belly. His suit was tattered with stains, and had torn in places Scott hadnât even noticed.Â
âScott I really think you should reconsider-â
âRoger, my time in office has been incredibly successful. Employment is at an all time low. People who were starving in the streets now have homes and food! Public transportation goes all over the city and our economy is thriving and healthy. All because Iâve invested in McTasties and fast food restaurants.â Scott went on, looking over the city, then back at Roger, âDonât think I havenât noticed your extra weight too.â He poked Roger in his belly, to which the pale man sheepishly backed off.
âJust listen to me dude, I think something is really wrong. I mean, how did you even convince the city council to get all of this done? Arenât they notorious for stopping all your ideas?â Roger asked.
Scott smiled devilishly, braggin, âThey attributed it to my âcharisma.â Theyâve really fallen for me.â He walked over to Roger and put his arm around his friend, âLook me in the eyes when I tell you this, Roger.â
Listening to his friend, Roger looked into Scott's eyes, but they werenât Scottâs. They glowed a deep red, and were almostâŚhypnotizing.
âGo get yourself some McTasties on your way home. Tell them itâs on me, theyâll cover it.â Scott ordered, very persuasively.Â
Roger couldnât help but slowly nod his head and turn around to leave Scottâs office. He could really go for a McTasties burger.
The next month saw Mayor Bradleyâs only roadblock in his reign of ordinances. A group called âAlternatives for Healthâ rose to political distinction as a, you guessed it, alternative to Scottâs campaign. Not that there would be an election any time soon, but they aimed to rally support against all of the fast food-centric regulations that had recently been put in place. Lobbying Scottâs office near daily, they wouldâve annoyed the hell out of any other group in office.
But, by this point, Scottâs staff had grown too fat and tired to care.Â
âURRRRRP, Desti-URRRRRRP. Destiny, whereâs mâ damn order of fries?â A sweaty, double-chinned, bearded face mumbled over the desk microphone. When there wasnât a response in 5 seconds, he repeated himself. âDestiny! URRRRRP, I need mâ aftaânoon snack!âÂ
âItâs, URP, on its way now. Sorry, thought it was for me.â A voice that was distinctly deeper than it was 4 months ago replied.Â
Just then, several bags of greasy food then came elevated up through a small nightstand-like desk. Grumbling as he slowly stood up from a wider chair, the fat mayor waddled to the bags of food. Not bothering to waddle back to his desk, he plopped his fat ass down on the ground and started devouring the food.Â
âGodâŚthis ainât gonna be enoughâŚitâs sho goodâŚgonna need moreâŚâ Scott trailed off, plowing through the food like he had the littered takeout bags in his office. Sweat poured down his barely clothed body, pooling into the rolls that were made from hours of eating. A white wifebeater and black basketball pants were what Scott adorned, since nothing else fit and he had to keep up âpublic decency,â whatever the hell that was.
A voice annoyingly came through his microphone desk.
âMayor you, URRRRRP, have a visitor.â Destiny rang.
Grumbling again, the mayor heaved his beanbag-esq belly off the ground and waddled back to his oversized chair.
âSend âem up!â Scott said, farting as he settled back into his chair. Just moving across the room had gotten him drench in his own salty perspiration. He rubbed his hairy, sweaty belly to coax out more gas before his visitor arrived. Though, he figured he already knew who it was.
âURRRP, Scott, I got more sco-URRRRRP-op on that health group.â Roger barged in. The trip to McTasties a month ago had treated Roger well. Some mightâve said a little too well. But Scott said it hadnât treated him well enough, and sent his friend back for more.
âGood man! Whadda they want? URRRRRRPâ Scott belched out, not bothering to stop eating.Â
Pulling out a bunch of graphs and research papers, Roger messily placed them all over Scottâs desk.
âSo basically, URRRRP, âscuse me. Basically theyâre trynaâ prove that beinâ fat is bad. Apparently it raises your chance for âheart diseaseâ and âcholesterol related illnessesâ but I havenât heard of anyone hospitalized for those things recently.â Roger explained.
Scottâs brain was still trying to process the papers in front of him. Months ago these wouldâve made sense, but for some reason he could barely comprehend the words. Words like âarthritis,â âartery,â and âhigh fructoseâ were hard to read. Almost like he was realizing his descent into slobdom, Scott almost put the pieces together.
That was, until Roger shoved the straw to a milkshake in his mouth.
âYa looked starved. Thank god I brought more McTasties.â Roger said, with Scott eagerly reaching for the bags with his sausage arms.Â
Roger rubbed his own exposed, pale belly that pushed out underneath his green hoodie. Surprisingly, the same hoodie from 4 months ago still fit the growing lard boy, but he was too addicted to the junk most of Stocksville ate for breakfast, lunch and dinner to be bothered to notice.
âSo,â Scott pause for a monumental fart, âHeh, that was a nice one. Anyways, whatâre we talkinâ about?âÂ
âThis, uh, health group.â Roger explained.
âOh yeah, how do we get rid of them? Theyâre gettinâ in the way of me buildinâ more McTasties.â Scott shoveled another handful of onion rings into his mouth. Roger couldnât even tell what was grease and what was sweat on the manâs face.
âJusâ...lemme handle it.â Roger smiled, with Scott appreciating the simple reply. âHowâs the move goinâ?âÂ
Processing the question, Scott remembered he had ordered the leanest of his staff to move his home necessities to his office.Â
âAwesome dude! I got a TV and internet, so Iâm basically set. All I need is a personal McTasties and Iâd never have to leave.â Scott replied, his rolls and moob jiggling as he went to wipe sweat from his forehead.Â
âSounds like the next ordinance at city council.â Roger smirked.
Scott belched and threw an empty milkshake cup into the trash pile that littered the room. âOh, I disbanded that. They all got too lazy to come. So now they put their trust in me to make the laws.â
Rogerâs eyes perked up at those words. âYouâre just telling me now?!â Scott let out more gas and continued to eat, âSorry, forgot I guess.âÂ
Roger went over to Scott and leaned against his a fat roll.
âMy friend, itâs a good thing youâve started moving; I donât think youâll be leaving your office for a while.â
âWhaddare they sayinâ? Mâ fuckinâ tits râ blockinâ mâ vision.â A fat blob of a man whined.Â
âHold on Scott I gotta turn up the volume.â A less fat, but still incredibly massive, man replied. The less fat man placed a milkshake in between the blobbish manâs moobs, with the latter eagerly sucking down the contents of the cup.
âRoge-URRRRRRRRRRRP. Whaddare they sayinâ damnit!â Scott whined again, finishing the milkshake in record time.Â
Roger smirked and smacked Scottâs immense belly, âYouâve got no opposition mâ friend. Youâre running unopposed next election.âÂ
The wide man forgot to mention how he had gotten a few of the skinnier interns to infiltrate Alternatives for Healthâs own office and sneak McTasties into their diet. A combination of this and tactically cutting off their funding so fast food was all they could afford spiraled to a quick downfall of their opposing organization. Scott let out a fart from the pressure on his belly, smiling nonetheless. âThasâŚURRRRRRPPâŚfuckinâ awesome.â He unabashedly stated.Â
âStill itâll be Stocksvilleâs first mayor whoâs a human blob. And I donât think itâll be the last.â Roger stated, planting a kiss on Scottâs greasy lips.
Scott let out more gas, drool and more greasy getting into his beard, âHuh? Did âm new order come yet?â Scott had gotten a one-track mind. Which might have been a good thing had he not been corrupted with greasy takeout. The naked blob of a man now never left his office. Not that he could, given his recent immobility in the past month. His thighs were as thick as a hog plumped for a Christmas dinner, leading to an ass that was as large as his belly just months ago. Whenever the man moved, either to let out gas, to try to see the TV, or, recently, to pleasure himself, his entire body jiggled as if shockwaves were sent through him.
Arms hung uselessly at his sides, sitting on rolls upon rolls of fat. His face was basically just his unkept goatee, his several chins, greasy, and sweat. Oh christ the sweat. It was as if Scott had constantly come back from a workout at the gym, but his workout was simply processing thoughts and eating his McTasties meals. It got tangled in his hairy body and made the entire office smell like a sports locker room.
âScott, âm back with your pre-pre-brunch snack!â Roger reassured the massive man.Â
Roger hadnât faired much better after being âconvincedâ by Scott to try McTasties. He was also shirtless, but wore underwear that had definitely seen better days. Just their yellow coloring and greasy stains were enough to paint a detailed picture. His gut rested over these underwear, looking like a dad who had recently gotten divorced and hit the liquor store too much, though with a more jiggly belly. He looked like Scott did just months ago, which didnât bode well for his future. âAnything I can get for ya while Iâm up babe?â Roger asked, opening his phone to see the news about Alternatives for Health.â The two had started dating because of what Scott again contributed to his âcharisma.â They were basically inseparable now, Roger serving at Scottâs beck and call.
âActually, fuck, yeah.â Scott said through mouthfuls of food, âCall in ân intern anâ suck me off.â Giving a knowing smile, Roger leaned against his massive boyfriendâs belly. He slowly got on his belly and crawled under Scottâs massive belly. They had done this enough times that Roger knew where to go in the sweaty expanse.
As an intern walked in and started to feed Scott, the immense man started to let out some affirming swears. Roger knew he found his goal.
âURP, Mayor Bradley, what will you do to, uh, ya know, make sure our city stays great?â An interviewer asks over a video call.
âIâll, uhm, URRRRRRRRP, uh, yeah.â Scott replied.
They were all too fat to do professional interviews in-person anymore. Not that it mattered. They only had one choice anyways. Thank god they werenât doing this in-person anyways. Scott barely fit in frame on the Zoom call. He barely fit in his office anymore. An amalgamation of sweaty, hairy fat.Â
âGreat response, babe.â Roger egged his boyfriend on. He was nearing immobility too, struggling to get up and feed Scott nowadays. The interns took care of that for them.
The interviewer, clearly struggling to paint Mayor Bradley in a good light, asked another question. âTo what do you contribute your, URRRRRP, successes.â
Scott nearly went cross-eyed. He let out a far that was audible on camera before responding. âMore, URRRRRRRRRP, McTasties. Thas whatâll do!â He slurred.
The interviewer smiled and said, âExcellent idea!âÂ
âThey should, PFFFFFFFFFTTTTT, vote faâ me jusâ âcus âm hot.â Scott gobbled down multiple burgers after the interview. Grease splattered all over him, and the walls. And his rolls. And his tits.
âThatâs a gr-URRRRRRRRRRP-great idea babe!â Roger continued to egg on the massive man.Â
It was a wonder nobody realized how their demon, oh sorry, âadviceâ, had caused all of this. Roger didnât do a very good job at hiding the evidence once he got a bite of McTasties.
If anyone had the brains to realize what was going on, theyâd know their mayor hadnât any.
That was okay, though. A quick bite of McTasties would fix their worries. Thank god they were expanding to other cities nearby.
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OOZEPUNK
WHAT IS OOZEPUNK?
Oozepunk is the term I'm coining for the microgenre of urban heroic sci-fi horror-fantasy that first exploded in the mid-80s with movies, shows, and comics like Ghostbusters, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, The Toxic Avenger, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Hellboy, Street Sharks, and others. Lots of natural crossover with Biopunk and Cyberpunk, aesthetically and philosophically.
Your childhood trauma didn't let you forget Roger Rabbit heavily featured colorful nightmare slime, did it?
A ragtag gang of weirdos (often horribly mutated--more on that soon) band together to save a city that doesn't understand them. Grimy sewers, abandoned buildings and graffiti'd brick walls are lit up by neon lights, streams of mysterious, glowing goo and/or the unearthly lights of futuristic particle weapons--ideally all of the above!
Beyond the "cracked concrete and gutters full of liquid plutonium" aesthetic, Oozepunk prankishly asks "What if catastrophic aberrations of science, particularly DUMPING TOXIC FUCKING WASTE STRAIGHT INTO THE ENVIRONMENT created fucked-up monsters... but they're HEROIC fucked-up monsters!" These catastrophic aberrations of science grant the heroes incredible powers, but COST them their place in human society. (Ghostbusters and Roger Rabbit eschew character mutation in favor of discovering that the undead and olde tymey cartoons are real [and exploitable!], respectively. 'Busters and 'Toon sympathizers alike are treated like insane idiots and/or frauds in their respective universes.)
Oozepunk heroes are challenged not only by strange supernatural beings, but by human society itself. The Ghostbusters battle with local politicians as much as they do the undead. In the recent (and delightful) TMNT: Mutant Mayhem, Splinter warns the Turtles of humans and their obsession with "milking" mutants for their blood--on top of the villainous mutants they're trying to thwart!
Crank up the creep factor in Oozepunk and you get awesome anti-establishment goo-horror like 1988's The Blob, The Stuff, Street Trash, and probably a bunch more. Toxic Avenger is a batshit crazy splatter-comedy (i.e. classic Troma)... and still garnered sequels, a kid's cartoon and toyline!
And there's a Shredder's Revenge-style Crusaders beat-em-up coming out next year??
youtube
This looks dope as shit
Ghostbusters and TMNT are the only current, "evergreen" (or radioactive green!) Oozepunk franchises I can think of off the top of my head, but Oozepunk elements are buried in almost all of the stories and settings I love the most. Heroic kaiju like King Kong, Godzilla and Gamera paved the way for our freaky friends, but so did comics characters like Fantastic Four's Ben "The Thing" Grimm, The Hulk and Swamp Thing. Hell, I think I blame SESAME STREET of all things for starting me down the Oozepunk path.
Surprise! I've loved screaming trash monsters with secret hearts of gold since I was a fucking baby, and they've ALWAYS been there for me!
But it's not just Oscar, Sesame Street as a whole is a proto-Oozepunk utopia, years before the big Ooze-splosion of the 80s. Muppets, monsters, talking animals and chill humans all live and work together to scrape by with a little dignity in a gritty-but-wholesome urban world!
Sesame Street, a decades-long reminder that educational childrens' programming can and SHOULD be cool as hell looking and loaded with all kinds of friendly mutant freakuloids.
OOZEPUNK! Whaddya think?
#oozepunk#ghostbusters#teenage mutant ninja turtles#toxic avenger#toxic crusaders#street sharks#who framed roger rabbit#ooze#slime#hellboy#sesame street#goop#goo#Youtube
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Previous: Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3
âVelvet finally breaks down and tells the truth about her brother⌠why hes been gone⌠Velvet now tries to run off as she figures out someone is after her. Floyd and Branch join her in hopes they can bring her back to BergentownâŚ
When she finds herself in danger, shes rescued by none other than her father, VaughnâŚâ
Velvet couldnât sleep that night.
She lay awake facing the ceiling⌠She could hear the low menacing growls of the Bandersnatch. Velvet didnât know if the thing was near her window, or if she was just imagining everythingâŚ.
But that wasnât the only thing going through her mindâŚHer entire conversation with her dad replayed over and over againâŚ
How long had it been since she heard his voice? Too long maybe. She hated that she missed itâŚShe hated that she missed himâŚ
Velvet turned on her side covering her head with a pillow⌠He sounded worried, sounded like he was looking for her⌠like he had been looking for them the entire time.
Heâs with your mother now, Vaughn had said about her brother. He had found him, he had found her brother and had been searching for her all these months. But she canât go backâŚshe wouldnât go back. Velvet tossed and turned being unable to sleep, unable to close her eyes. One thing was for sure, she needed to run. She needed to run and get out of thereâŚ
âIs that thing still out there?â Floyd asked Branch, joining him on the edges of the Bergen wall. The brothers glanced out to see the Bandersnatch pacing back and forth just outside the Bergen walls. Guards were placed all around the perimeter around the clock.
âYep. Still growling and prowling. The Trolls are using the under ground tunnel to come in and out. Bergens are too afraid to walk out.â
âThat thing is owned by someone.â
âWhat?â Branch arched an eyebrow, what gives you that idea?â
âI noticed a collar around its neck. More like a sort of tracker.â
âSoâŚ. Someone sent it? After Velvet. I donât get it.â Branch turned to look at his brother, âWhy go after an ex pop star? A fraud basically.â
âYour guess is probably as good as mine.ââŚ
The Trolls turned to make their way back to the Bergen castle, when they noticed a shadow moving about outside one window. The moonlight illuminated her green hair, the purple beanie she had on⌠Velvet.
âWhere is she going?â Floyd quickened his pace, Branch at his heel calling out to him, telling him to stop.
Velvet swung her bag over her shoulder. She figured in the Bandersnatch was at the far end of town, sheâd sneak off the opposite direction, hoping she could sneak by without any detection. Velvet packed everything she could. Anything that would help her get a couple of days away from Bergentown. Where she was going, she wasnât sure herself, she just needed to leave. She secured her brotherâs beanie safely around her head as she began climbing the Bergen wall. Velvet had to hurry before guards come to patrol this side of the wall.
Securing the rope she began to climb and climbâŚthe only exit being the front of Bergentown. When she got to the top, she could see that forest surrounding the back. Perfect. It was perfect for her to hide in if she was pursued. Quickly glancing around her she reeled up the rope and tossed over the other side to make her way back downâŚ
âWhere are you going?â She heard a voice call out. Velvet turned around to find two little Trolls standing amongst the stone of the wall.
âBeat it! Iâm out of here.â She murmured.
âOkay bye.â Branch turned around to walk away, Floyd holding back by the arm.
âOh no! No you donât. That thing is out there obviously trying to get you. Someone is out there trying to get you. Youâre staying here where itâs safe.â Floyd demanded.
Velvet scoffed turning to the small Troll, âDonât you think that thing is gonna figure out how to get in! Once it does, weâre all in trouble. I just need to go. I canât stand it here!â She tossed the rope over the ledge securing it tightly.
âVelvet, whatâs going on? Weâve noticed something has been off about you since you got here. Weâre worried. Youâre not telling us anything.â Floyd followed her.
She began climbing down the wall, âNothing is wrong. I just want out. I just want a fresh start.â She moved faster and faster until her feet were firmly planted at the bottom. Unhooking the rope she reeled it in and put it away. Floyd moved, but Branch held him back.
âYouâre not going to follow her are you?â
âShe canât be out there alone! She needs protection. I have to find out whatâs going on, maybe convince her to come back.â Using his hair, Floyd swooped down landing on the other side of the Bergen wall with a thud.
âFloydâŚ..Floyd!â Branch called out. âUggggghhhhhâŚâ He groaned swooping down to follow his brother, âYou owe me Floyd.â
âVels! Vels!â The little Trolls ran to her, as fast as their small legs could carry them.
âBuzz off.â She groaned trying to ignore them.
âVelvet please. You canât go out there by yourself⌠You have to stay safe. At least until that thing is gone, then you can leave.â Floyd begged hoping sheâd turn around, but her pace only quickened as she neared the woods. Velvet glanced back, making sure the creature wasnât at her heelâŚit hadnât caught her scentâŚat least not yet. She followed a trail, glancing up at the treesâŚVelvet could hear the Troll trying to talk to her, trying to reason with her, but she continued to ignore himâŚshe continued walking for what seemed hours. Velvet had walked so far in that she couldnât see the Bergen castle through the trees.
âVelvetâŚ.VelvetâŚ.Velvet!â Floyd kept crying out. But she wasnât stopping, she wasnât listening, âFineâŚYou leave me no choice,â He stopped in his tracks, Branch by his side, ââŚ..whereâs Veneer?â
âŚThat did itâŚThat made her stop. Her hands clenched into fists, ââŚ.What did you say?â
ââŚVeneer. Where is he? Why isnât he with you?â
Branch could see the anger begin to form inside the girl, ââŚFloydâŚthats enough.â
But he continued to press on, âWhere. Is. Veneer.â
Velvet spoke, her back still to them, a cold tone to her voice, âI told you to never say his name. NEVER. How dare youâŚHow dare you speak his name!â
âWhy Velvet? Why canât I say his name?â
ââŚFloydâŚâ Branch began to warn.
She turned to the Troll, eyes furious, âBecause you canât!!! No one can anymore!â
âWhy Velvet?â
âBecauseâŚ.â
âBecause why?â
âBecause I said so!â
âThatâs not a reasonâŚ.Why Velvet?â
She pulled at her hair, falling to her knees, letting out a cry, âBECAUSE HEâS DEAD!â Velvet wrapped her arms around herself, tears spilling out from her eyes, âThere! Happy? Happy to know the truth now! Happy to know why I canât stand being in Bergen town. Stand being around youâŚStand hearing his stupid name! I want to forget him! So stop saying his name!â
The Trolls only stood there. No words, nothingâŚVeneerâŚ.Had been dead this whole time? It was surreal. He was so young. How? The Trolls were afraid to ask. She had just opened up to them about her brotherâŚIf they pressed on, she would shut down again.
ââŚVelvetâŚâ Floyd began.
âNo! Donât say anything! Donât you dare say anything!â She cried outâŚ.
SWOOSH.
A sound in the thicket caused them to pause, the Trolls ears perking up in alert. Velvet wiped her tears away and stood her ground⌠She took out a small kitchen knife she took from Gristleâs castle��.
SWOOSH⌠the sound came and went again.
Velvet began backing away slowly, her feet warming up to prepare to runâŚnothing yet âŚ..
⌠SWOOSH!âŚ
Velvet screamed as the Bandersnatch pounced on her, knocking her on her back, its menacing eyes and yellow teeth snarling at her. She tried kicking and budging, trying to break herself free.
âVels!â The brothers cried out. They wrapped their hair around the nearest try, and attempted to sling shot towards the creature. It was enough to distract it for a second, giving Velvet the opportunity to grab the kitchen knife and stab the creature on its shoulder.
It let out a wailing cry, loosening its grip, allowing Velvet to break free and scramble to her feet. She took off runningâŚ.she didnât know which direction, Velvet just needed to gain distance from the damn thing. Branch and Floyd swooped in landing on each of her shoulders.
âHead back to the Bergen castle!â Floyd cried out.
âI am!! I just donât know which way Iâm freaking going!â The more she ran, the more she realized she was getting farther and farther away from the castleâŚVelvet had ran the total opposite direction. She could hear the snapping and breaking of branches and twigs behind herâŚ.the creature was gaining on them. Velvet stopped and spun in circlesâŚnothing but trees all around herâŚso she began to climb.
ââŚWhat are you doing?! We have to run?!â Branch exclaimed.
âItâll catch me! I donât have any other ideas, twig!â She exclaimed. Velvet climbed all he way tot he top of the tree. It was perfect, it was too high for the creature to jump.
The Bandersnatch closed in. Following her scent it looked up at her with a menacing snarl, ââŚWeâre to high up.â Floyd murmured.
Yes. But would it be enough to discourage it?
âŚ.ThudâŚ.ThudâŚ.
The Badnersnatch began jumping on the tree causing it shake. Velvet held on desperately⌠it was trying to tear down the treeâŚ
âCrap!â Velvet cried out.
âYou gotta move! Jump to the next tree!â Floyd cried out. But each time Velvet stood up, the force the Bandersnatch was inflicting on the tree knocked her to her feet⌠nearly knocking her off.
âI canât!â She cried out. Crap, crap, crap, she murmured. Why did she have to leave? Why was her loss, her mourning causing her to make irrational decisions?
âŚ.thudâŚthudâŚ.thudâŚ
She screamed as the tree began to loosening from around its roots, it was loosening and beginning to top over.
âFloyd! We have to get out of here! We have to go!â Branch exclaimed looking at his brother.
âIâm not leaving her.â
âŚthudâŚthudâŚthudâŚ.
Velvetâs eyes darted around frantically. She tried collecting a plan, tried seeing where is she could run to, where she could hide. What this creature lacked in jumping, it made up for it in sheer strength and speed. So no matter what, she knew this thing would eventually catch herâŚ.
ScreeeeechâŚ. Crash!!!
A vehicle came speeding from the thicket, slamming against the Bandersnatch. It sent the creature flying knocking it out coldâŚ.
ââŚ. What the hellâŚ.â Velvet murmured.
A figure emerged from the drivers sideâŚ. A tall, pale Rageon, tattoos seen on his forearms, dark, peacock hair slicked back. His icy blue eyes looking up to meet VelvetâŚ
âDAD!?â She called out.
âDad?â The Trolls repeated in unison.
How? How the hell did he find her? A mix of emotions was running through her veins. She wanted to be mad, appalled⌠how dare he come for her! But then⌠she felt a happiness surge her veinsâŚ. Her dad was here, everything was going to be okay⌠she was safe.
Vaughn met her eyes, âVelvet! Are you hurt?â
âWhy do you care!?â Was her snarky remark.
âDammit Velvet right now is not the time for your attitude. Get down. And letâs go!â He demanded.
âNo! Go away! We ran away from you for a reason!â
âVelvet, get down! And get in the car!â
⌠low growls were heard coming for the Bandsnatch⌠it began to wake up.
âOnce that thing wakes up weâre all dead! Now get in the car!â
âGo away!â
Vaughn threw his hands in the air, pacing around, frustrated at his daughterâs stubbornness. She could hear murmurs and curses escaping his lipsâŚ
âVelvet! Please just listen to him!â Floyd eyed the Bandersnatch as it began to stir.
âVelvet!â Her father called out again.
â⌠noâŚâ she repeated again.
âVelsâŚâ A familiar voice spoke to her. She turned to see her brother right next to her, âHe came⌠he came out for you sis.â
âI canât forgive him.â She scowled.
âI think you did⌠when dialed that number.â
Velvet thought long and hard, gazing upon her brotherâs face, âDamn you.â She murmured. Velvet turned herself around and began climbing down the tree.
Vaughn got back into the drives side while Velvet hopped on the passengers side, the Trolls still on her shoulder. He drove off quickly, before the Bandersnatch could regain any conscious.
âThere. Now take me back to Bergentown.â She demanded looking at her father as he stared intently on the road. The Trolls eyed him⌠there was something menacing about him, something cold⌠now they see where Velvet got it from⌠but they also saw the resemblance Veneer had to him⌠the boy looked like his father. A familiarity began to pass through Floyd, but he couldnât quite put a finger on it.
âBergentown? You think I came all this way to get you and take you back to Bergentown? Youâre coming home.â He scowled never taking his eyes off the road.
âNo! I donât want to go home! I donât want to ever go back! Take me to Bergentown!â She screamed.
Vaughn gripped the steering wheel, biting his tongue he didnât want to say a word, he didnât want to say something heâd regret, but Velvet kept venting.
âI donât ever want to go back home with you! NEVER! I will NEVER forgive you!â
SCREEEECH!!!
Vaughn hit the brake hard and turned to his daughter, âAfter months of looking I finally find you both!âŚ. But I find Veneer dead!? My little boy dead!!!âŚâ
SilenceâŚ. The Trolls and Velvet only listened. They can hear the tears Vaughn is holding back, âI thought I would find you dead too, but then I receive that call and know youâre alive! Alive and away from me. No. Youâre coming back. I am bringing one of my children back with me alive.â
At that moment, Velvet wanted to hug her father, but her anger, her rage towards himâŚ. Her pride took the better of her.
She shook her head violently, ââŚ. I am never going back with youâŚ. Thereâs no point. I donât have my brother anymoreâŚ. And it was better when mom was aroundâŚ.â
Velvet bit her tongue as soon as she said those words⌠she saw the hurt it brought her father, words that broke his heart⌠Vaughn opened his mouth to say somethingâŚ.
CRASH!!!
A another vehicle came slamming in from behind them, sending their car spiraling into a tree. The Trolls held on as tightly as they could⌠Floyd went flying away hitting himself against the window knocking him out cold. Velvet was able to grab hold of Branch before he went flying too âŚ
The chaos stopped⌠the tree brought there car to a halt. Velvets head buzzed as she banged it against the window. Her vision fuzzy and blurred.
ââŚ. DadâŚ.â She called out. Regaining her consciousness, she turned to Vaughn. He lay leaning against the window, blood seeping from the side of his head and nose, ââŚ. DadâŚâ
Worry began to sink in her heart and voice as she unbunkled her seatbelt. She reached over to check his pulseâŚ. She couldnât feel anything. How do you check for a pulse? Tears started falling down her eyes.
âDaddy!â She cried shaking him. Then a pair of hands reached in and grabbed her from behind.
âHey! Let me go!!!â She kicked and screamed. Another pair also grabbed Branch tossing him into a small glass compartment.
âWhat gives!â He yelled.
âLet me go!â Velvet continued to scream, âDad!! Daddy!!! Iâm sorry!!! Daddy please wake up!!â She cried and cried as they carried her away⌠throwing her into another vehicle, and driving offâŚ
#trolls band together#trolls 3#velvet and veneer#veneer#velvet and veneer trolls#trolls veneer#velvet#velvet trolls#trolls#veneer trolls#trolls velvet#trolls au#trolls 3 band together#trolls 3 velvet and veneer#trolls fanfic#fanfics#fanfiction#fanfic writing
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Rules: Make a 24hr poll listing the titles of every WIP you want to work on. (Itâs fine if you only have one, still make a poll for the vote count). Whichever WIP title gets the most votes, write 1 sentence for every vote received.
I was tagged by @thezombieprostitute The challenge makes me sweat but since holidays are not far....why not ?
Can not believe I have that many wips lol. I am such a fraud.
Tagging: @waiting4inspiration @irishhappiness @darkficsyouneveraskedfor @stargazingfangirl18 @laketaj24 @naaladareia (because you have to vote for your man !)
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Check That
eren yeager x black!femreader
summary: sometimes when family crosses boundaries, you have to remind them of their place. my excuse to write thanksgiving clapbacks
wc: ~0.5k
tags: fluff, comedy
warnings: mentions of food
notes: happy thanksgiving if you celebrate!, school is whooping me sorry i havenât been posting oftenđ, beta read, inspired by those tiktoks, mostly centered around the reader, i feel like iâm just yapping in thisđđž, feedback is welcome
Every year. You donât even know why you come to your grandmotherâs house every thanksgiving just to deal with your hypocritical family. You wish you wouldâve just gone over Erenâs familyâs house instead. Your leg bounces and Eren rubs your knee comfortingly.
âY/N, why do you sneak off on us every other holiday? We are your family, you shouldnât avoid us like that.â An aunt not-so-secretly judges you, her southern drawl making it all the more demeaning, but this year you came prepared.
âThe same reason the repo man snuck off with that busted Nissan of yours.â You reply nonchalantly, causing your boyfriend to choke on his greens before covering it up by taking a sip of his water. Quiet snickers are heard across the large rectangular table as you continue to eat.
âStill ainât got the car back yet either.â Your mother says under her breath, but loud enough for you and Eren to hear. You smirk, trying to keep yourself from laughing. You appreciate the fact that your parents have always had your back when you needed it.
That seemed to be enough to keep your aunt quiet for a good while. You bask in the warmhearted laughs and conversation now that your shady aunt has nothing more to say. The comfort of family is beginning to melt all the stress of your daily life away. That is until your aunt Jackieâs daughter Destiny decides to chime in on the topic of marriage. Sheâs been giving Eren bedroom eyes the entire evening.
âSo cuz, this is the first time you brought Eren over for a family dinner. Are yâall a serious thing?â She twirls her fork in the spaghetti on her plate, making doe eyes at Eren that causes him to screw his face up slightly.
âEren and I are just as serious as your fraud charges. Thank you for your concern, can you pass the yams?â You reply, rolling your eyes and feeling annoyed all over again. Your knee bounces a bit more intensely and just like always, Eren is right there to soothe you. He rubs your knee and places a kiss on your cheek for good measure. You exhale heavily, doing your best to keep yourself in check.
A few hours later with no further incidents, you and Eren say your goodbyes and leave out the door. You get in the passenger seat and let out a heavy and exhausted sigh. Eren turns your head towards him gently, just two fingers on your jaw and chin. He places a long, soft, and loving kiss on your lips.
âYou did good today, I thought we were gonna have to get it poppinâ on thanksgiving.â He jokes, resulting in a chuckle coming from you. His eyes seem to glow a little when he sees you smile, a satisfied look on his face.
âThere she is, thereâs my lady.â He almost coos at you, his voice is just as soothing and warm as the smile on his face before he brings you in for another kiss. The two of you pull away slowly, taking some time just to stare at each other and decompress together.
The two of you make it home with plastic bags of takeaway containers in tow, setting them on the table before separating them into what the two of you would eat on your own, and what you would share. Ultimately stuffed, you and Eren lay on the couch tangled in each otherâs limbs watching Charlie Brown movies.
#samâs masterlist#black reader#black reader insert#black!reader#fluff#eren x black reader#eren jeager x reader#eren aot#eren x black fem!reader#eren yeager#aot x you#aot eren#attack on titan#snk x reader#aot x reader#black!y/n
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I think apart of the reason why this fandom has such a skewed understanding of what a Proship is,
Is because we have a lot of minors in here
Not trying to bag on yâall I just turned 18 myself last year
But hereâs the definition so maybe we can stop some of this curfuffle of a debate
It is a ship that involves pedophilia, incest, and abusive relationships
Keep in mind it would have to be CURRENTLY/STILL abusive To fall into a proship
If you lumped ships that have had past abuse into proships then a lot of canon relationships in media would be proships. (Scroll past green if you donât care for the other media examples)
Tiny List for those who care:
Katniss x Peeta (he choked her/tried to kill her)
Luz x amity (Amity tried to get Luz dissected and has attacked her during the witches duel)
Adora x Catra (fought each other for seasons)
So why should you care to use the correct definition instead? Because one day it could get your ships too
So hereâs a list that includes some ships from this fandom that if you used âold abuse counts/caused trauma â they would be considered proships:
Jesse x Petra:
- attacks Jesse while being controlled by pama (trauma)
- attacks Jesse while being forced to by Romeo (trauma)
- constantly yelling/taking anger out on Jesse for her problems (yelling at Jesse in the portal hallway for being the leader because she wanted a turn then running off, yelling at Jesse for their success over shadowing herâs in Stellaâs treasure room, ect. Not saying Petra canât vent but she yelled at Jesse like it was their fault when it was something they could not control) (yes mental stuff counts)
Jesse x Lukas:
-Lukas was apart of the gang that bullied Jesse
-attacked Jesse when controlled by Pama (trauma)
-Surrounded Jesse with the new ocelots when he thinks thatâs the real Jesse to âshow them how things used to beâ (which btw, has a weird undertone cause like Jesse was NEVER part of the ocelots so does he mean how he used to have a gang of friends that could mess them up?) (trauma)
Soren x any old member of the stone:
- tricked them all into being frauds/didnât tell them he was controlling their skills
-almost got them killed by the dragon, brought them there to slay it knowing well exactly what their skills really are
I can go on and on
And before anyone says âYOURE LOOKING TOO MUCH INTO ITâ thatâs exactly how much you guys look into the people youâre harassing
So please start using this word correctly before your ships are next <33
~~~
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