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alicedopey · 6 hours ago

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Mind games

Fandom: The 355, The Gray Man Pairings: Nick Fowler x Reader (Past relationship), Lloyd Hansen x Reader (Not established) Genre: Angst Number of words: 1131 Warnings: None Summary: Nick sees you with someone else and he does not like it. A/N: Just a drabble that @thezombieprostitute inspired with this post.

You hated those events. It was always overcrowded, too noisy and just a way for the big heads of the office to show off. But when the boss said it was mandatory for all agents of the CIA, you had no other choice. Funny how your superiors tended to remember you were also a full agent when it was to attend some meaningless event but loved to point out you were not a real agent each time some left on a mission and you just stayed there in front of your computer.

Luckily, attending said event did not mean mingle and socialize. Once you had made yourself seen, you knew they would not pay that much attention to you.

Thus, as soon as you got the opportunity, you slipped out and got a breath of fresh air on the terrace. The chilly air of this spring evening caressed your face and you exhaled with relief.

“So, Hansen, huh? Didn’t think he was your type.”

You instantly tensed as you recognized the voice of the man talking to you. He had set his eyes on you and your date the moment you came into the room where the event was taking place. He did not even acknowledge you though. He just stared down at you and looked the other way mere seconds later. You felt his eyes on you all night long and yet, each time you turned your head, he was busy talking with someone else. You ended up thinking it was just your imagination but it looked like it was not the case after all. This made absolutely no sense. Why would he spend his time looking at you when all he wanted to do was pretending you did not exist?

“He asked.” You answered nonchalantly without even bothering to turn around to face him.

Your companion snorted and you heard him get closer. You tensed even more as you tried not to make a move and show him that you were upset by his closeness.

“You and him being here together has nothing to do with the fact that you are perfectly aware we hate each other, I assume?” He asked mockingly.

“Not everything has to be about you, Agent Fowler.” You answered as you finally turned on your right to look at him. He was staring at you with those mesmerizing blue eyes that made you fall for him in the first place. His dark suit was making him look elegant and yet, so sexy. He was a girl’s trap and he knew it. You felt your heart clench. You had been one to fall into his trap and got hurt in the end.

“Hansen is not someone to play with. He could hurt you in the worst possible ways.”

You frowned at his words. This was not like him to show some concern. What was he playing at?

Nick tried to reach for your arm but you put it out of his way immediately. “You are the master at playing games, not me. Mind your own business.”

He raised his hands in an appeasing gesture. “Just thought you should know.”

“Go back to the party, Agent Fowler. Your date is waiting for you.”

Nick scoffed. “Is that what this coming here with Hansen is all about? Because of Mace?”

“Again, not everything is about you, Fowler.”

It was half a lie. Agreeing to go with Lloyd was just a way not to come alone, Nick Fowler or no Nick Fowler. But he knew being seen with Mace would hurt you, considering that you were always envying the respect she got towards her peers just because she was on the field. What hurt the most though was coming to terms with the fact that Nick saw you just as unworthy as the others did and being here with her was him showing it you. He was mocking you and that was making you feel truly angry.

“I got that you did not want to have anything to do with me anymore. You did not need to do that. Just because I am not a field agent doesn’t mean that I am an idiot or uncapable of doing anything. I got a pretty clear view of the way you are seeing me.” You snapped at him.

“That is not what this is about. I am not interested in her and I value your work…”

Nick tried to catch your arm but you managed to evade his touch once again.

“Of course, you do.” You sneered. “By the way, I heard you were going on a mission together. Congratulations! It looks like all your wishes are coming true. I am glad I could be useful for once.”

Nick pinched the bridge of his nose. Frustration was radiating from him. “This is not what it looks like.”

“Really?” You tilted your head. “What does it look like, then? Tell me, Agent Fowler. I am all ears.” You straightened up, crossing your arms against your chest sternly.

Nick just stared at you but no words came out of his mouth.

“Just what I thought. It is precisely what it looks like, Agent Fowler.” You laughed ruefully before turning your back on him and making your way towards the glass door.

“Just…be careful”. Nick said softly.

His tone made your blood boil. “I can take care of myself, don’t worry.” You answered without even looking at him. “Besides, you’ve been ignoring me for the last three months so stop acting like you care.” You added coldly.

He took a few steps towards you but stopped when you abruptly turned around and threw daggers at him. You were waiting for him to mock you, give a snarky comment like he used to do but he just watched you intensely at you and sighed.

“There are things that I can’t tell you but… just keep in mind Hansen could hurt you.”

You snorted. “You have seduced me, took advantage of me to get some information, ridiculed me and ditched me. What more could he do?”

Without waiting for an answer, you left the terrace and closed the door behind you, leaving Nick alone with his thoughts. You hugged yourself as the reality of the situation hit you once again. Blinking back tears, you joined Lloyd as he was talking with one of your colleagues.

Nick watched you through the glazed doors. His jaw ticked as Hansen put an arm around your waist and held you close. You let him and even smiled at him. He clenches his fits. Things were not going precisely as he had planned but he had a mission to go through first. Then, he will get you back. No matter who he would have to get rid of along the way.

Tagging: @thezombieprostitute

#thanks for reblogging!#mind games

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alicedopey · 7 hours ago

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Ah Zombie, I kept this to enjoy it before going to bed and I was not deceived. First, I am glad to see a new part of the Royal AU posted, especially if it's about Ransom hehe. Second, I am happy to see them together and I am proud of reader for trying to make it work as much as possible, even if it means dealing with a grumpy Ransom. He seems to have understood her demands though. "It doesn't surprise you he's not trying to return the fake affection." Well woman, he is just doing what you asked. You do not want him to touch you, he is obeying. It's not like Ransom is used to PDA anyways. He probably fucks around, that's it. It's going to be fun witnessing him being unsettled by those sudden displays of affection. I bet reader could be surprised too in the end... Speaking of demands, "Well, maybe he wouldn't object to you have a separate relationship as well. You'll have to bring it up at your next round of negotiations with him." I doubt he is gonna regret it if he agrees to it because something tells him once Ransom gets attached, he will turn very territorial. Also, reader already picturing him trying to get rid of her or taking a younger and prettier mistress as soon as he can, breaks my heart. The angst ! The angst ! ....I love it lol ! Now about Linda. Well, she was her usual despicable self, self-centered and obnoxious. Hated her comment about reader's body being curvier. But, maybe she could be reader and Ransom's common enemy. Somone who could bring them close.

Anyways, thanks for the update, it was awesome ! You rock, as always !

Royal Pain: Announcements

Summary: You talked back to Ransom and now you're getting married to him!

Warnings: Arranged marriage, Bad parents, Fat shaming, Insecure reader. Please let me know if I missed any!

A/N: Reader is plus sized, female. No other physical descriptors used.

Word Count: ~1.8k

Series Masterlist

The press in the midst of a "Wedding Season" campaign. With the announcement of Prince Rogers' engagement to the Princess of Carga, the media was making it seem like it was a good time for everyone to get married. It certainly made your own engagement announcement easier to handle since it got swept up with all the others or buried by comments about the Prince's announcement.

That's not to say it didn't hurt that your wedding was considered so much less important. You knew you'd never make the front page, that your wedding wouldn't be an ordeal, but it would be nice if your friends would actually congratulate you. Then again, every time you chat with them you get the feeling of being unwanted. It was difficult to find anyone who would let you into their friend circle but now they appear to hate you for marrying above your station. Even though you didn't ask for it, you're now somehow both above and beneath their interests.

No friends and a future with a man who didn't want you. Well, your mother never made any promises of love and happiness in your future.

At least Ransom seemed willing to negotiate a few things so you wouldn't be entirely miserable together. Maybe he'd tolerate you getting a pet cat so you wouldn't be so lonely. Sure he said he wasn't able to get a mistress but Linda won't be around forever and once Ransom has full access to the accounts, either he'll divorce you and marry someone younger and prettier or he'll keep you around for optics while sleeping with someone younger and prettier. Well, maybe he wouldn't object to you have a separate relationship as well. You'll have to bring it up at your next round of negotiations with him.

Today you're meeting with Ransom and his mother, Linda, to discuss the plans for the wedding. Based on what you know about her, you're fully expecting to just sit and agree with everything Linda says is going to happen. Yet another aspect of your "special day" that you have no control over.

As you enter the manor, you're greeted by a servant who takes your coat and another leads you to Linda's office.

"Your Grace," you say as you politely bow.

"Oh, just call me Linda," she says in a tone that you recognize as fake friendliness. Well, at least she's better mannered than Ransom and your friends?

"Hello, Linda," you correct yourself. "It's nice to meet you in person. You're quite the legend!" It was no exaggeration on your part. Linda's fight to inherit her father's title instead of her brothers was quite the impressive feat. Even if the primary reason for it was her father advocating for her at the court with bribes and being overly dismissive of her brothers.

She smiles and shakes her head with a false modesty that's easy to see through. "Honestly, I just hope I can inspire more women to fight for what's theirs."

"And where is Duke Ransom? I understood he'd be joining us for the wedding planning?"

Linda rolls her eyes, "he should be here already. He's probably whining and moping in his room again. You'd think he'd grow out of this." She lights up a cigarette before turning to one of the servants, "go and bring him here." As the servant bows and leaves she turns back to you, "at least it gives us a bit of girl time, right?"

You smile and nod. Linda gestures for you to sit across from her and sits in her own overly large chair clearly built to add to the intimidation of the giant desk. You were meant to feel small in front of her.

She continues to talk about herself and her accomplishments while you smile, nod, and mentally take notes. The nobles you've interacted with seem to take it personally when you don't remember something about them and will not hesitate to "quiz" you at random times.

In the middle of telling you how she single-handedly increased her property's crop production, Ransom stumbles in, reeking of alcohol. Linda rolls her eyes at him as he nearly trips over his own feet. You rush to help him, giving him your arm. The stench of alcohol clings to him and his breath and you can't tell if he's hungover or still drunk.

"Oh, don't worry about him," Linda waves her hand. "Let him fall on his face."

Ransom sneers, "oh sure. Would serve me right for trying to enjoy my last few days of freedom."

Speaking as tactfully as you can you tell them both, "it might be good for me to learn how to handle him when he's like this. In case he's like this in public?"

"Smart," Linda nods. "Should probably also get some practice on PDA while you're here. Don't want either of you flinching at each other while on camera or something."

Ransom snorts. "She doesn't want me touching her."

"Well I don't blame her," Linda scolds. "You're a mess! But you're both going to at least be holding hands whenever you're seen in public, understand."

"Yes, Linda," you nod, keeping your eyes down.

"Yes, Linda," Ransom mocks.

"Don't you start with me, young man," Linda chides, wagging a finger at him.

Before Ransom can reply you look at the servant who brought him, "can you please get some water for him?"

The servant turns to leave and Linda gives you small glare. "Already trying to usurp me?"

"Oh, no. I'm so sorry, Linda---"

"Your Grace," Linda interrupts.

"I'm so sorry, your Grace," you say while mentally noting the change in address based on her mood. "I will refrain from instructing your servants any further."

"Good," she snaps before turning to Ransom. "You see, Ransom? This is what good behavior looks like. This is acting with integrity."

Ransom rubs his forehead. "Can we save the lectures for after the painkillers kick in?"

Linda rolls her eyes and you see the family resemblance. "Fine. Let's go over some of the wedding details. But I need to make sure you two can pass as a 'happily married couple' so you better start practicing!"

Without further prompting you take Ransom's hand and gently rub the back of it. You feel him try to pull away but then he seems to think better of it.

"You said you didn't want me touching you," he mutters.

"I don't, but right now, I'm touching you, not the other way around," you softly explain as you continue to pet his hand.

"You touch gently," he comments as he watches your hands move.

Not wanting to feel even more awkward, you turn back to Linda, "have you already picked out a venue for the wedding, Your Grace?"

"Yes," she nods as she pulls a large folder from her desk. "It's a traditional wedding spot from my husband's side of the family. I would have set up something from my side of the family but it's currently overbooked because of the Prince's wedding. You understand." You nod in confirmation and she continues. "Now, given that the place is outdoors, we have to have a flowers and plants themed wedding. We'll get you a custom made dress from one of our designers. I'm sure your person is very good, but we need to upgrade your wardrobe to match your status. There will be a lot of fittings because they're not used to someone so...curvy."

You give a small smile and nod while Ransom rolls his eyes. The servant arrives with the water and Ransom busies himself with drinking it, removing his hand from yours.

"Also, I know that young ladies today are a bit more...sexually aware--" she's interrupted by Ransom spitting out the water in surprise.

"Seriously?" he yells.

"Oh grow up," Linda shoots back. She turns back to you, "I'm all for the more sex-positive stuff, of course. Body positive, too. But our designers have some serious codes for their wedding dresses. If you're not a virgin, they will not give you a white dress, it'll be off white. So we need to know about your virginity status."

Heat rushes to your face as you tell her, "I am a virgin, Your Grace." From the corner of your eye you see Ransom's face turn a shade of pink.

"Excellent," she says as she makes a note. "Now, for the flowers I'm thinking sterling silver roses. The roses for 'love' and the purple to remind people of your new status. It will be a small wedding, of course, but that just means fewer people for Ransom to embarrass us in front of."

"I'm sure he'll do okay," you demur as you resume holding his hand.

Linda scoffs, "I sure as hell hope so." She points her pen at Ransom, "best. Behavior."

"Yes, Linda," he huffs.

She turns back to you, "make sure he doesn't drink at the reception."

"Yes, Your Grace," you nod again.

The rest of the meeting is spent as you expected, simply nodding and agreeing with everything Linda has already planned out for you. You're regularly making sure pet Ransom, hold his hand, other things. It doesn't surprise you he's not trying to return the fake affection. What does surprise you is how, aside from that first instance, he has yet to try pulling away from you. Clearly he's as eager to not get yelled at by Linda as you are.

The two of you are finally dismissed with Linda telling Ransom to take you out for lunch and "smile for the cameras." You were hoping for some time to decompress but that'll have to wait. At least it'll give you and Ransom another chance to negotiate some aspects of your shared life.

Ransom insists on driving you to a nearby restaurant but you're hesitant. His car is his pride and joy and you don't want to accidentally break something on it. He lets out an exasperated sigh and opens the car door for you.

When he gets into his own seat he says, "don't expect me to open the door for you every time, okay?"

"Oh, that's not what I was...I was worried I'd damage your car somehow," you admit.

He gives you a confused look. "How would you?"

"I don't know! But I know this car is your world and I didn't want to screw something up."

He gives you a look you can't interpret. "Huh. Okay. Let's just get some food. I missed breakfast."

Tagging: @alicedopey ; @delicatebarness ; @icefrozendeadlyqueen ; @irishhappiness ; @kmc1989; @lokislady82 ; @peaches1958 ; @ronearoundblindly; @theinheriteddutchess; @thiquefunlover63

#royal au #ransom drysdale x reader #ransom drysdale #royal pain

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alicedopey · 8 hours ago

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Please reblog if you are a girl and have ever been made to feel ashamed of one or more of these things (wanting to prove a point to some asshole):

-your weight

-your clothing choice

-your amount of make up

-having sex

-not having sex

-breast size

-having your period

-saying no

-not appreciating catcalls

-masturbating

-body hair

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alicedopey · 8 hours ago

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Oh it was truly a delight to read ! I loved this ! The reader is so cute and a perfect example of an unmarried young woman at that time, that is innocent and naive. Her questions were so cute and I am glad Bucky had the patience to answer them.

The sex scene was written wonderfully. Bucky was so attentive and caring. It was beautiful.

Now I admit I am a bit worried about the following parts because the summary is foreshadowing some trouble and a very distant Bucky...

Anyways, great fic ! ❤️

Want To Be Loved By You

Part 1

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary: He's in need of a wife, and you are in need of your own household. As you're an orphan your cousin Steven is in charge of you and arranges the marriage. Fortunately your new husband is kind and appealing. At first things are going marvelous, but when Bucky suddenly becomes distant, things take a turn. Your happiness might not be a given anymore.

Word count: 4.634

Warnings: arranged marriage (but consented), mention of orphans, awkward wedding nights. Mentions of ableism and derogatory names and views of disability.

Notes: another one🥹 I really enjoyed writing this, I think these two are really cute together! I'm hoping you will enjoy it as well. 💕

Masterlist * Lord au Masterlist

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

You were nervously pacing around in your room for the remainder of your solitude.

What should have been a happy time surrounded by family and friends celebrating your happy day was now one full of nerves and loneliness.

Sure, cousin Steven was there as well, but you two were very new to each other and he was more concerned about his friend than your well being.

You realised he saved you from poverty, as he could have sent you away or maybe the goodness of his heart could have given you a small allowance, but instead he set up this marriage.

His friend was in need of a wife, and you were in need of a home; a perfect match.

And now the day had arrived where you were to be wed to a stranger. You had conversed only once, with Steve acting as chaperone and as Lord of the House, but you had never been alone with him. You had heard of the man’s reputation, of course, hearing he had been injured in the war. All you knew however, was that your future husband was honorable, but less desirable as a suitor since he lost his arm during battle.

Despite your lack of wealth, your name was good enough to marry someone of his standing, and you would be taken care of.

More importantly; at least Lord Barnes lived nearby so you would have family around you. You suspected he was lonely too as both of your parents had died, though his much earlier than yours, and therefore being near your cousin might benefit both of you.

You supposed you should be grateful that your future husband was not much older or much uglier, but you still feared for what the marriage would bring. Would you even have things in common, would he treat you nicely? Would the marriage bring forth children? All these worries circled around in your head, but it was foolish to think of now when you couldn't change anything anymore.

Promises had been made and within the hour you would be Lady Barnes with your own house to keep up, and a husband by your side to obey and follow. Hopefully he would be pleased with you.

There was a knock on the door, hesitantly, and as you called out, a shy maid entered and asked you if you were ready. As ready as you could be, you thought to yourself. As you stood up, you nearly stumbled and righted yourself. You hoped it wouldn't happen in front of anyone else. You could only imagine your husband's shame as he surely would think he had married some boorish girl.

You walked out of the room, with your head held high, your parents had given you the right education after all, and you would not shame their name. Cousin Steve was waiting just outside, looking quite nervous himself, as he fiddled with his sleeves and tried to pull it down. He was in need of a new wardrobe. His short stature seemed to have stood still since early adulthood, yet had risen barely noticeably during his earlier years. You would speak to him about it at your next visit. He was high in ranking, he needed to dress the part.

Cousin Steven was a bit of a mystery. All your life you heard about his fierce temper, opposite what people assumed when they noticed him, but he had displayed kindness when he met you, and he truly seemed to care for his dear friend. He spoke freely of his admiration of Lord Barnes, a man he considered the reason why he was still alive. Both Steven and Barnes had insisted on fighting instead of simply giving orders and sitting back as others did the job for them. It was admirable, but in Steven's case, quite a risky adventure. He did not look like he would take even a friendly brawl.

He survived apparently because Lord Barnes had shielded him, causing his arm to take the damage. Everyone spoke highly of this brave act, yet several ladies turned away when he approached, since a missing arm was not a pleasant sight to behold, and an injured husband needed care they weren’t willing to provide.

You had no idea how much your husband needed a carer, and resigned to fill your further days helping him. A companion as it may, but a wife in public. It was a good match, you supposed, you needed each other.

You took Steven’s arm, and breathed deeply in and out. “I am ready.”

Steven smiled slightly. “You sound like you have to brave the battlefield.”

“Do I not? All eyes here will be watching me. I never imagined how it must be for those marrying someone they do not know. Now I do, I must admit I do not like it much.”

“Bucky is a kind man, you will find out soon,” he assured you.

That was another thing. Bucky. A nickname Steve used. In return, Lord Barnes called him Stevie. And it seemed he was the only one to be able to do so without Steven becoming insulted. It was through friendship these men were able to address each other so informal. You were allowed to call Lord Rogers by his first name and you had been relieved enough he seemed to want to be more familiar with you. Your last remaining family member.

As you walked, you felt your heart beat fast, and Steven squeezed your hand in a clumsy manner to comfort you.

You saw Lord Barnes in front of the clergyman, looking - if you may say so - quite dashing. His hair was full, and the dark color complimented his blue eyes. Had you seen him in passing, you would have found him handsome and perhaps even giggled with the other ladies who agreed with you.

Now he was looking sternly ahead of himself, reminding you this was duty that called. Not romance.

The ceremony was simple. Vows of honor, in sickness and in health, and you reminded yourself of that profusely, after all it was why you were here, were it not? A vow of loyalty and care. A press of his hand, chaste and quick. Your first touch. It wasn’t anything to make you wish to faint, like you heard some women talk about. It was forgettable.

There was to be cake and a celebration, but it wasn’t extravagant. There were few people there. A few former army friends, a few of your friends, but it suited you just fine. You weren’t in the mood to be rambunctious.

As the excitement died down and it was time to retreat, that's when the nerves came up again. You were going to go home. To his house, to a new bed and new servants. Everything would be different. You were not looking forward to spend the night in bed linens, not your own, being prepared to lay down by strange faces. It was a woman’s burden to adept, however, and many had done it before you. It was times like this that you missed the kind words of your mother. The missing faces of your parents put tears in your eyes. And you knew your husband must feel the same.

He helped you in the carriage, his hand strong and warm in yours, the second contact you had since meeting him, and how strange it felt. As you settled in, he sat down beside you and you felt heat rise inside of you. Being so near a strange man, not your close family, would take some getting used to. And off you went, to your new life.

When you arrived at The Barnes Estate it was impressive enough, and as you walked through the halls, you admired the simple design. Nothing was trying to prove its wealth, like some of the Gent liked to display. Lord Barnes clearly didn’t feel like he needed to prove anything.

He offered you a light supper and you agreed, it had been long enough since you had eaten and you did not wish to retreat to bed with an empty stomach.

Sitting at the same table as your new husband proved to be slightly uncomfortable as you both seemed to search for a subject to conversate about. You asked him if he liked hunting and after an awkward pause you realised your mistake and lowered your face in shame. He answered none the less, saving you more embarrassment.

“I used to have good skill in the activity, unfortunately it is not in my capabilities anymore. However, I found other entertainment.”

“Oh, such as?” You asked, eager to change the mood as well as the subject.

“I have always enjoyed reading, and I found I can still use a pistol, so while I can't go hunting and riding, I like to walk with the dogs and practice my aim.”

As someone who was never incited to such outings, it wasn’t proper for women after all, the idea of simply walking and using a smaller weapon had never occured to you and it was a relief to find your husband wasn’t ready to give up on pleasures in life and was finding new ways to entertain himself.

“I have heard you are quite good at painting?” He asked you, and you nodded, happy to discuss something you did know about.

“I have loved it ever since I first got lessons. Of course I could never live up to the great painters, or make a living of it, but I have always gotten praise from all my teachers.”

“And they weren’t paid to do so?”

You felt offended until you looked up and saw the amusement lingering around his lips. “No. They were paid to teach me well, and they did. One teacher even lamented that it was a shame I was a woman, because if I was not he could teach me more.”

“Ashame indeed. Personally, I think one should be able to pursue their talents.”

You were in awe about that. “You aren’t against a woman indulging herself?”

“On the contrary, I find it unfair how we expect women to stay home and give up any interest for their husbands.”

You were silently staring at him, amazed at his words. You had never heard anyone speak the way he did.

“I have no problem if you want to paint, the room on the right wing has a lot of sunlight in the morning, it can be yours if you wish.”

This was a kindness, most unexpected and you could barely whisper a ‘thank you’ while you tried to process all that had happened in such short minutes.

You continued finishing your plates and agreed to withdraw for the night. You wished him goodnight and hurried after the housekeeper to show you your room and prepare you for the night.

The woman addressed some younger maids to help you out of your clothes and wash you, a bath already prepared for you, steaming in the air, and hands carefully undressed you and guided you to the water.

You sighed as the hot water engulfed your body and you relaxed for the first time that day. You were washed, and you tried to find out the girls' names and remember them for next time. They were friendly enough but you missed your own servants. Steven’s servants now, of course.

As soon as you were done and clean, they dried you off and helped you into your nightwear, as you eyed the bed. It was big, you would feel small in it. They left you in front of it, smiling to themselves, some of them blushing.

“Goodnight M’lady,” they whispered , and left you alone. “M’Lord will arrive soon.”

They left before you had time to react. Arrive soon? Oh my. You had wondered if he expected to sleep separately. But deep down inside you started to come to the realization your husband might indeed mean to consummate the marriage. He had not shown any signs of a man with no energy left, in fact he was very active and made use of the possibilities he still had.

Suddenly the nerves came back, and you wrung your hands. The wait seemed to last forever. Maybe he wasn’t going to show up anymore? It has been a long day, perhaps he had fallen asleep?

You sat on the bed and then abruptly stood up again. It might look too promiscuous. But then, your husband might want to…to touch you. You brushed unseen wrinkles out of your sleeping gown, wanting to look composed. With trembling body, you waited.

When he arrived he looked hesitant, but he approached you anyway. You smiled nervously, eyes catching on his but breaking the contact several times, noticing he did the same. He was not as comfortable either. Had he laid with a woman before?

You heard about men laying with women out of marriage - though the picture you imagined was actually laying side by side, fully dressed, or maybe in night wear (scandalous!), as you did not yet know the deed between a woman and man.

When he eventually neared you, his arm reached out and touched the sleeve of your arm gently. “You look beautiful,”

Warmth spread through you. It was nice to hear that you were pleasing your husband at least in looks. You smiled smally and replied. “I think you look very handsome too today, husband.”

He froze, only a moment, but you feared you had spoken wrongly, until his hand reached up to your arm. “I want to take you to bed, darling.”

And his voice, so gently, had you melting inside. The look he gave you when you dared look back at him, only worsened it. He looked like he was suddenly seeing a good roast, or the sweetest of desserts. You did not know what to think of it, but your body did. Reacting in ways it hadn't before.

He guided you towards the bed, and before it you stood as his hand started undoing your dress. You had to help him when he got frustrated at the slow progress. Your fear of him feeling incompetent with missing one arm overshadowing your insecurities about being exposed. He was your husband now after all. In sickness and in health. He was allowed to see you and do with you as he pleased.

He stood back and watched as you revealed yourself more and more, and licked his lips. He had a full mouth, beautifully shaped lips, you wished to draw him some day. He would make a beautiful portrait. You reminded yourself to make one of cousin Steven as well, thanking him for deciding on a kind husband and not just the richest but more unpleasant one he could find.

You did not care for the missing arm, it was undoubtedly holding him back from certain activities, and you tried to understand the ways this held him back, but he seemed healthy and capable nonetheless.

You had prayed for a kind soul, and the body around it mattered less than being treated well by it. So far, Lord Barnes seemed to be intent on not scaring you into submission.

He had started undoing his clothes as well, and you could not deny the way his naked chest raised even more heat in your body. The way he did not seem to have any fat on him, the way his muscles seemed to stand out.

You had been exposed to the naked body - only for your art classes of course, and it had been very hush hush, like your teacher thought it was highly inappropriate but necessary for you to progress- but it hadn't looked like this.

Your hands reached out without further thought until you managed to come to realization at the very end and halted. He had witnessed it, however, a smile spreading on his face, those beautiful lips blessing you with the sight. “You can touch me, if you please.”

You took no further convincing. Your hands exploring what they could reach. His abdomen, his pecs and shoulders. The terrible scars did not faze you. Your painter's eye already envisioning how you'd position him, and where, for the best lighting, and how you were going to mix the blue to get the right color of his eyes. The way he would look magnificent once you were done.

Of course he couldn't be naked, that would be shocking, but perhaps one day you would have the courage to ask him to pose naked, and keep the portrait to yourself, hidden away from other eyes.

The thought excited you. So much so, that your hands traveled down to explore the appendage dangling between his legs, a gasp falling from both your mouths. It was a strange thing. The feel of it, and the way it moved and filled, and became bigger!

Oh how glorious. You did not know it could do that.

“How much!” You expressed in wonder.

“How much what?” He stuttered.

“How much bigger can it become!” you let out in excitement. Your mind coming up with all possibilities. “I did not know it could move.”

He let out a chuckle and when you eyed him, he was highly amused. “It grows a little, but this is the end of it. Believe me, you would not want it to be bigger.”

“No?” You wondered. Why not, it was marvelous!

“You won't want it to hurt.”

“It hurts you?” Suddenly you were terribly worried and instantly let go of him in fear you were causing him pain.

He laughed again. “Not me, but it has to go inside of you, you would not want it to be so big it hurts you more than it should.”

It would hurt? You stepped back, suddenly repulsed. “No.”

He sobered up from his mirth. “Oh no, honey, it will be fine. I will be gentle.”

“That,” you pointed to his eager looking manhood, “goes in me?”

He hesitated and thought for a moment. “It does. I will prepare you and then it will go inside. It will feel good.” He tried to assure you.

Suddenly your happiness about it growing evaporated. “Can you make it go back?” These were hopeful words. It didn't look as intimidating as much before.

“No,” he sounded certain, amusement seeping through again. “Only after.”

“After what?” Your curiosity piqued again.

“After we sleep together.”

“It stays like that a whole night?!” You were so shocked, imagining him in this state until early hours. It looked very uncomfortable.

He averted his eyes. “No, after…nevermind, I will show you.”

He guided you to lay down on the bed, carefully letting you settle. He was very strong, and you watched the muscle in his arm bulge as he helped you to adjust in the sheets. Eager eyes swallowing all his movements. He had the physique of those Greek statues of their gods, surely some of them seemed to be inspired by him.

Then his hands trailed down your body, over your breasts and you squeaked, never had a man touched you so boldly before. They pebbled instantly and you seemed shamed enough for him to notice.

“Your body reacts to me, as it should, this is good.” he murmured to you assuredly. “I will prepare you, but you will let me know if it hurts you, or if you do not like it, understand?”

You nodded. Slightly scared of the “if it hurts” part. But you were supposed to lay with your husband, the priest had informed you of your duties, since your mother could not. He had told you firmly to obey your husband and fulfill your womanly obligation. You presumed that was to run a household correctly and please your husband and have children.

Of course the man never actually explained what that meant entirely, but it had apparently been of no concern.

So, obey you will. Lord Barnes seemed to know what to do, maybe the priest had explained it better to him, for as a man he was allowed to know such things as he needed to guide and protect you. He certainly moved with an eagerness you hadn't expected.

Sleeping seemed to have nothing to do with it!

He had moved lower, to your private parts and that did not prevent him from urging your legs open. Weirdly exposed, you laid there, his movements in front of you sending a brief waft of air against your sensitive area. You shivered.

“This is where it goes,” Lord Barnes explained as he touched you gently, causing you to gasp. A tingle went through you at the touch and your eyes shot to him. “I feel faint,” you warned.

He smiled affectionately. “It will worsen.”

Worsen? Were you in need of a doctor? He was quick to reassure you. “It is normal. you will feel warm and tingly, much more. And it will be fine, let me do what I want, I will make it feel good.”

You had to trust him. He was your husband after all. But you were not completely convinced. You eyed his appendage again. “That?” You shakingly pointed.

“Will go here.” He told you, his fingers moving around your opening and you clutched his arm. To stop him? You weren't sure, it simply all felt too much.

“Let me in,” he whispered. His eyes were locked in between your legs, mouth reddened by his biting on it, and cheeks a healthy blush. He looked eager. You weren't sure for what, but the thought of putting his manhood into your womanhood seemed to not repulse him in the least. The thing twitched in front of you.

“Is it hurting?” You whispered, still concerned he was in pain.

“No, it's unpleasant, it wants to release.”

“Release?” It could come off? “Where does it go?”

He suddenly stopped touching you and chuckled again, his hand rubbing his face, then stopping to groan and smell his fingers, before his eyes found yours and burned into them.

“Darling, I can't explain properly without shocking you. But believe me. It will be happy to be inside you and be able to find a place there. Let me move on with it before I'll release where I'm standing and embarrass myself.”

Was he talking about urinating? You were so confused, but every question seemed to amuse him and you did not want to further embarrass yourself. This was proving to be a very difficult situation. The clergyman had not inform you of this!

Feeling slightly annoyed with the man’s antics, you wondered if at next service you could approach him and persuade him of perhaps making a mass out of it, warning future wives exactly what was to happen so they would not have to endure this the way you were. You were set on remembering the details leading to this. Surely if you informed him the way your husband approached you and touched you, how big his manhood grew and where it was supposed to go, the clergyman would realize the women had to be warned? The man himself might not know what to do with his own, never married after all, but perhaps if you delicately explained, he would understand the urgency! Perhaps the nude portrait would serve well here! You would start on it in the morning.

Thoughts of making a pamphlet were interrupted as your husband reached down once more and inserted his fingers into your…into you…. You moaned. There was slight pain, but it felt so weirdly warm and intimate you didn't know what to think.

“My Lord”, you gasped as the rest of his hand rubbed over something more sensitive.

“Bucky,” he told you, voice so low it didn't sound like his own. “Call me by my name.”

“Bucky.” You obeyed easily.

He groaned again and rubbed quicker, as his fingers moved in and out and the friction was uncomfortable, perhaps overwhelming, maybe delightful, maybe pleasant, all at once?

He seemed to have no patience anymore. Removing them before you were ready. Feeling strangely bereft of something, but there was no time to linger, as he grabbed his manhood and moved quicker towards you.

Moving between your legs, you felt the warm end of him bumping into you.

“I don't want it to hurt,” you confessed,

This made him look at your face again, a warm look in his eyes as he looked down at you. “I will be gentle. It might only hurt a moment, for the first time, as you adapt to me, but I will go slow and it will feel better. Pleasant even.”

“How do you know this?”

“I-” he looked away in shame.

You suddenly realized. “You have done this before.” You didn't know why you felt disappointed. It was different for men and women, like everything was in society. It was expected for a man to behave in public, but you heard rumors of scandals, had seen the difference between men making mistakes, opposed to women. So it would only be reasonable to believe this act between a married man and woman would be tainted as well.

“But you will be the last.” He vowed. And strangely, you believed him. He seemed very adamant. “Had I known before, I would have waited for you, but I was young and foolish. The only benefit I have from it now is that I know how not to hurt you and make it pleasant for you.”

And as he said that he pushed forward and you yelped. He stilled immediately and shushed you. His only hand touching your face gently, a heavy smell coming from them you weren't acquainted with. It did not matter. He was comforting you, gently stroking your cheeks and lips, murmuring words to you, trying to distract you from the pain and fullness of him being inside of you.

He kissed you softly, and that you did like. His full lips were so soft and warm as they explored you. You clutched into him.

“When,” you gasped. “When does the pain lessen?”

“In a moment” he assured you. “It won't be long, darling.”

It took too long in your opinion. “Surely it isn't pleasant for you either?” You were desperate to believe you weren't the only one.

“It is very much so. The best feeling in the world,” he admitted, and it seemed he couldn't stop his hips from moving, causing you more discomfort.

“Don't move,” you ordered desperately. It was very unfair! That you just suffered, while he seemed to derive pleasure from it!

“I'm trying, but you're feeling heavenly.” He praised, his lips kissing your neck before lowering to your hardened nipples and softly suckling them, sending a shock right down your core.

“Oh you liked that, wife?” He teased, and tortured the other nipple.

“Lord - Bucky!” You scolded, but it was lost in a moan.

His hips pulled back, making you feel strange ever more as you felt your body unwilling to depart from him, before gliding forward again.

“Bucky!” you exclaimed again. “It feels weird.”

“It's going to feel so good soon,” he groaned. He continued his rocking back and forth, his hands finding that tingly spot again, and then it felt wonderful.

His member gliding in and out, his fingers rubbing you, and everything felt amazing.

You grabbed his arm where you could reach and spread your legs further, you moved, you moaned, you felt warm all over.

“You look so beautiful like this,” he confessed, moving faster and you felt something building up from inside. “My wife. My Beautiful wife. I'm going to, I'm going to -”

And you didn't know what he was going to, because suddenly everything fell black as the pressure unleashed.

Part 2

Tag list:

@rnurse-kole

@peaches1958

@alicedopey

@chickensarentcheap

@thezombieprostitute

@watermeezer

@greatenthusiasttidalwave

#lord au #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #want to be loved by you

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alicedopey · 9 hours ago

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Awww 🥰 It was the most adorable fic ever. The reader makes one awesome event planner, the Easter egg hunt she organized was excellent and I loved that she personalized a little gift for each of them. She really is a gem.

Steve was the sweetest as always. I am glad he found the strength to confess.

Very sweet fic ! ❤️

Easter hunt

Summary: You decide to plan an Easter hunt for the Avengers.

Pairing: Avenger Steve Rogers x Event planner female reader

Word count: 2574

Warning: None pure fluff

A/N: Happy Easter for everybody who celebrates it. I hope you will like this story. It's a big more a team story that a real Steve one but I hope you will like it.🥰

This story is part of my contribution at @marvel-oc-hub ❤️ - It's the Holiday prompt

You had been in contact with Tony for the last ten years. You were one of his must trusted partners. You were the one being able to make a simple event into something memorable. This is why very young, you decided that you would be an event planner. Your speciality was parties but it could be a lot of different things. For you, it always was a pleasure to see smiles and atonement because of your creation. You loved it. You loved making people happy. It was one of your goals in life.

Today had been different. Tony did not personally request you. He did not really plan to do anything until you came to his lab to see him. He was working on a new Iron Man suit. You were always fascinated but the dedication and the look of them. They were always so impressive with the full technology that he was putting in. However, if someone asked you if it was your favourite suit, you would say no. Your favourite ones were the ones that Steve Rogers was wearing. You could see the small details change over the years. You had to admit that you had been attracted to him really early in your encounter. You did not have a lot of conversations with him, but his charming personality and shyness always made your knees weak. You were trying very hard not to fangirl when meeting him despite wanting to know everything. How were the forties? Why was he so eager to fight? What did he have to prove? What is it like to wake up in this new world? Does he wish to go back where he was coming from? What was his favourite food growing up? Does he like coffee? You wanted to know everything, but you were not close enough to authorise yourself to ask all of this. You wanted him to be comfortable if one day you did.

When you asked Tony if he had prepared something for Easter, he told you that he was not really celebrating it. Your eyes popped. How could he not celebrate the day of chocolate? Yes, you knew that Easter was not primarily the chocolate holidays, but it was for you, so you really did not understand him not doing anything. You were here to make him a proposal. You wanted to do something nice for the team. They were working really hard to save the world. The last mission a few months ago was a big one. You knew it because one of your friends was a field agent. You would have organised something earlier, but you had in mind that Steve and Bucky probably never celebrated Easter. You knew, of course, that Loki and Thor did not have this tradition in Asgard. You also suspected that Natasha had not celebrated during her childhood. It seemed really intense. You did not know the context, but even if she did, you did not think that she really did anything special.

You were in the leaving room, finishing to put the last basket on the table when you saw the team coming in. It was still early, but you thought that the earlier, the better. You needed to enjoy the sun before it was too bright. With the help of some of your collaborators, everything was ready on time. You greeted everybody, letting them take their place. Some sat, and the other stood up. They were curious. You could see Loki in the background trying to hide the fact that he was inquisitive. He pretended not to care about what was about to happen.

“Good morning everybody. Thank you for coming.”

You looked at all of them.

“I know some of you would probably prefer to be in bed while others are awake for hours already. I tried to find an hour that would not be too early. I know that you are working really hard to keep us safe, all of us. People don’t seem to see it, but I do, and I wanted to thank you all for that.”

You tried to regulate your breathing. It was not as easy as planning something for Tony. You were actually now afraid that you made a mistake. They were adults in front of you. And if you would be really happy if someone proposed you your idea, you did not know how they would react.

“I know that for some of you, Easter doesn’t mean a lot or even anything, but I was thinking. A lot of you never had a proposer Easter egg hunt, and I just wanted to offer you that. I hidden with help, of course, eggs all over the compound and the garden. Some are chocolates, and some are different. I don’t want to spoil you anything. I thought it could be fun.”

Your eyes went to each of them. You could see smiles on each face. You did not really expect that. For Loki, it was more of a small line turning up into a smile.

“So you are telling me that we can hunt and find chocolate eggs and eat them?”

“Well euh yes. That was the idea. When the bells go back to Rome, they leave chocolates behind them. So I was thinking of ringing this bell and everybody would look for them?”

You look at the bell next to you. Bucky could sense that his question might have seemed like he thought it was childish. He stood up.

“Do we need to pair up or is it a solo mission?”

You let a sighed that you did not know that you were holding. Your face brightened at his enthusiasm.

“It’s like you prefer, but I think will all of your competencies, you don’t really need to team up.”

Natasha jams in.

“I am so in. I am going to kick all of your asses.”

“Not if I found them first.”

You could not help a laugh leave your mouth.

“I just want to say you can use your power, but the maximum eggs that you can find are thirty small ones, ten mediums and three big ones to give a chance to everybody.”

“That’s not fair.”

Your head turns to Loki, your smile falling down. You hoped that they would love it and did not really expect any reluctance.

“Why not?”

“What if I found everything before the others. That means that I can not participate after I find my numbers?”

“Well, it’s for everybody to have fun and be able to enjoy the day. I know that all of you can bit the others and that’s also the fun of it but everybody needs to have fun, not just one person.”

“Fine, if you insist.”

It kind of makes sense, but Loki wanted to win. He did not like to lose. He intended to find the maximum of eggs and the fastest.

Once all of them were standing up, you rang the bell. Everybody quickly stood up to go hunt. You watch them looking for the eggs. You loved it. They really seemed to enjoy it. You could see the competition. They started by the tower before going outside. You did your best to put egg in every location possible. Some were easy to find for others, and they needed to look more for them. After all, they were superheroes. They needed some challenges, and it was always fun to look for them to find them easily.

Steve saw an egg in the branches of one tree, but Loki had been faster, open a pocket with his magic and taking it.

“Hey, you cheated.”

“She said that we could used our skills.”

He smiled and move on to his next target.

You saw Natasha and Bucky fighting over the biggest egg. She tried to do her signature move, locking him with her legs but he arrive to defeat her and tie her against him, while Thor defeated Tony by extending his hand just on top on him where he could not reach. The scene was so funny to watch. All the members were participating. You had a doubt with Loki and Clint, but they took part of it without any complain, really enjoying themselves. You saw Clint climbing a tree like if it was nothing and Natasha doing the same on the opposite side. You laughed when you saw them try to take the same egg, making them lose their balance by being surprised to see the other. Steve sprinted against Bucky after seeing one of the big eggs after looking for it for a long time.

After two hours of hunt, all the eggs had been found. Everybody had their basket full. You could hear them talk over each other.

“That was so much fun. We should do this again.”

“I totally agree. I really liked to just run for pleasure and not a threat.”

“I am really happy that you enjoyed it. I can prepare it again next year.”

“You will need to participate.”

“I liked doing it for others.”

“but we really want you to have fun too.”

Natasha tried to save Steve. She knew the soldier desperately wanted to ask you out. If he had to wait another year, he would be alright with that. She would not. He would spend another year talking about you instead of making the first move.

“I have one last surprise for you.”

“You did not have to. It’s too much.”

“I really wanted to. I did not know who would win, so I wanted everybody to still have something at the end of the day.”

You brought a package for each of them. The bag was at the colours of the suit. Steve opened curiously his. Inside was an egg. It looked like a Fabergé egg. Of course, it was not a real Fabergé egg, but like them, each egg was different. You decorated them with their colours. Inside was a little gift. For Steve, you put a little plate saying “You are special in your own”, for Bucky you put a figuring of a white cat to remind him of Alpine, Natasha received a little plate saying “be yourself”, Thor received a little hammer while Loki was blessed with a little charm spell, for Tony, it was a replica of his first creation, Clint received a small family figurine, looking exactly like them. For Bruce, you went a bit more old school and opted for a little Matryoshka doll that was alternating with him and the Hulk. You wanted them to have something special because they were their own people, and you wanted to show them that.

“God, it must have taken you so long to do all of this. You shouldn’t have.”

“It was nothing really.”

“You keep saying that but that’s not true. It must have taken you ages to do all of this.”

Ok, it took you the last three months to create all the eggs. You had to recreate some of them because the present was not fitting inside. However, you wanted them to feel special and that all that mattered. You did it with love. Time was something to be spent on who you wanted and what you liked. This is exactly what you did.

After eating lunch outside, taking and watching movies when the weather decided to turn to rain, it was time to go home. The team offered you to stay in one of the vacant rooms. You could have, but you thought it was better to let them be together for the end of the day. All of them walked you back to the entrance, thanking you profusely. You smiled, telling them that you were really happy that they enjoyed their day and that they all deserved it. You were crossing the double doors when you saw Steve coming next to you like if he tripped. You looked at him, raising an eyebrow. He shows you the door, letting you go first before accompanying you to your car.

“Thank you for organizing all of this. It was really nice of you.”

“No problem. I am really happy that everybody liked it.”

“Liked it? Everybody loved it. We don’t do this kind of things. It’s one in a million for us.”

“Well, if you ever want me to organise something fun even if you don’t have any idea, you can just call me. It will do it with pleasure. You all should have time to just enjoy yourself and have fun.”

He looked at, not saying anything for a few seconds. You took it as a queue to leave.

“I should go.”

“Hum sure.”

You open the door. Before you can enter, he puts his arm in front of you. The team will kill him if he does not do it. It was now that he needed to make a move. He could see you looking at him, surprised by his gesture. He took a deep breath.

“Do you really mean it?”

“Mean what?”

“That I am special on my own.”

You smile at him softly.

“Steve, you never had been the serum. Does it help? I suppose yes, but you always had been special by being yourself. You are courageous, you are kind, you are empathic, you are shy, you have your morals, you are stubborn but you listen to other people opinions before you stick to yours, you have a smile that could light up the entire universe if you let it. You try your best every single time. You are special, and you deserve to believe it. You deserve to be happy and not let your insecurities take over. You are special just the way you are.”

He kissed you without thinking. He knew that it was too spontaneous. You probably just saw him as a friend or at least just Steve. He probably made a mistake that would make you run away and not come back or at least not talk to him. You tip toe to have better access to his lips. He pulls you closer when he does not find any resistance. After a long time, you break the kiss, needing air to breathe. You smiled at him.

“I was wondering. I know that it might seem inappropriate but would you like to go out on a date with me?”

“Inappropriate? I think it’s the main thing that you can do after kissing me like this.”

“You think so?”

“Don’t you? Do we need to kiss again?”

He nodded. This time, you initiated the kiss. He let you take the lead before needing more. Keeping you the closest to him like you would disappear.

“Are you sure you need to go home.”

“Well, I guess I can stay a little longer if you really want me too.”

“You could stay forever.”

You put your head in his chest, smiling like a teenage girl.

“We might need to ask the team first.”

“We don’t mind.”

You jump, not expecting to hear all the Avengers at once. You move to see them all standing outside the door. You look up to see you Steve watching you.

“I guess I can at least stay for the night.”

Everybody erupted in screams, happy to see you take the next step with Steve. He would have taken four years for the soldier to ask you out, but it was the perfect timing.

@mochie85 @alicedopey 💗💗

#steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #easter hunt

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alicedopey · 10 hours ago

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If you get a star ⭐️ in your inbox. It means your moot appreciates you, and your efforts in the community. Send this to 10 mutuals to continue the love!

Awww thank you so much 😊 ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Right back at you, sunshine.

#mutuals love #answered asks #asks answered

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alicedopey · 11 hours ago

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Sebastian Stan for the Vanity Fair 2025 issue

#sebastian stan #is it hot in here ?#the last one 🥵

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alicedopey · 11 hours ago

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Precisely what I need too 🥵 A Lloyd / Nick sandwich.

You know what I need? Both Nick Fowler and Lloyd Hansen, right here right now… Same time same place 🥹🙇‍♀️🥵

Wanna know something interesting? ME TOO!🥵🥰🩵

#nick fowler #lloyd hansen #is it hot in here ?

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alicedopey · 16 hours ago

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Well, it was bound to happen. I am just sad Simone sensed something was off between Lloyd and her mother (because, technically, she cheated too even though she was not willing) before sensing something was off coming from her father. She began understanding that he was useless but she still doesn't know how much. Who can blame her honestly ? She comes to conclusions from what she is seeing and her mother was in another place, sleeping in another man's bed....it's easy to assume something is going on.The problem is that tension are gonna rise between mother and daughter and Pete is gonna take advantage of that...or not, because he is so stupid lol.

I am not certain Simone will tell her father and even if she does, the more I think about it, the more I'm quite sure he won't believe her. Pete won't think for a second that some man as successful as Hansen (because that's what he thinks he is) could be interested in his wife.

If things turn ugly, I sincerely wish he won't claim the kids. Mama Bear is gonna feel horrible and the kids won't be happy. It might help Simone realize how much of a scum her father is but still...poor little beans.

Lloyd's interactions with kids are so funny and awkward lol. He does not know what he is doing but he is trying...which makes it even more awkward. But I love it !

Thanks for updating this one, I love Mama Bear !

Same as it ever was 15

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as neglect, bullying, manipulation, cheating, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Between your home life and work, you just can’t catch a break. Especially after you draw the ire of your boss.

Characters: Lloyd Hansen ft. Pete Brenner

Note: Hellllooooooo

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

Your muscles release as you whine. The orgasm ripples but unlike before, it doesn’t pinch behind your tailbone. It’s like everything is looser. You heave into the top of the pillow as your body slackens against the cushions.

Lloyd rubs you gently as he slows, spreading your cum along your folds, a trail streaked over the curve of your ass. He gropes you, only for a moment, then lets you go with a growl. He sighs.

“Fuck,” he taps you with a single finger. “Dimples are kinda cute, ya know?”

“Hansen,” you snip.

��Don’t undo all my hard work,” he warns and stands. “Now, I don’t know how you put up with them but you got kids. They got what... four more hours at school? That means we need to get you back in semi-working condition.”

“The doctor said I need to relax,” you say. “Which is easier when you’re not around.”

“Sure, my mom used to say as much—er, cut that.” He snickers, but not very genuinely. “Look, he said a hot bath would do ya well. Get this, I got just the thing.”

He bends and scoops his arms under you. He tips you into them and lifts. You lean into him with no other choice. You’re overly aware of your stomach rolls.

“Baby, this is kinda hot. Like a doctor-patient sorta thing. When you’re back on your feet, maybe I'll get you a nurse outfit. Crotchless and all,” he taunts.

You groan and rest your head on his shoulder. You’re tired and weak. A little ashamed of how easily he got you going. Well, he's taking advantage of an injured person.

He’s right, though. It’s been a long time since Pete got you off. A long time since he genuinely wanted you. He might claim to be trying since you found out about his betrayal but you know better. He’s guilty and afraid. He feels bad for being caught and doesn’t want to face a life of single fatherhood. Well, you think you’re done worrying about what your husband wants.

Lloyd carries you into a pristine bathroom. Gold-veined black marble with matching metallic trim. Large mirrors across the wall above the floating countertops; a furry bathmat; fluffy towels hanging on gold bars, and a large black porcelain tub with a perfect circle brim. Huge, deep. Expensive.

“It’s got jets,” he proclaims proudly as he sits you on the toilet, a fluffy cover over the lid. “Ten settings, including pulse.”

You look around. Another twinge of inferiority in your chest. He saw your house, the home you barely keep together; your worn-out couch and fading rug. As much as it makes you self-conscious, it makes you angry too. How’s a prick like that get paid for being so terrible?

He bends over the tub and twists on the faucet. He pushes down the stop and stands with a groan. He braces his hips.

“Ah, I’m feeling a bit stiff myself,” he turns to you, his bulge at eye level. You sigh. “More than enough room for both of us.”

Your eyes drift to the side. He’s worse than a child. He is willfully petulant.

“Let’s get you in first,” he lifts you and angles you over the edge. You grip the sides and help him ease you in. You won’t complain, not as the hot water laps around your legs. Sweet relief.

He steps back and peels off his shirt. You roll your eyes. He snickers. He strips without shame, leaving his clothes in a heap. He steps over the wall of the tub, dick bobbing without a care, and lowers himself across from you. He keeps his arms stretch around the brim.

“Ahh, this is nice, isn’t it?” He preens.

You meld with the porcelain, staring at the ceiling.

“Quite the upgrade, huh?”

“Look, I get it. It’s a nice place,” you say.

“Baby, if you think that’s what I’m getting at--”

“With as much respect as I can muster for you, Hansen, kindly just stop for two seconds.” You rest your hands in your lap and groan. “Thank you.” You look at him. “I appreciate you doing this even if it is for your own gain.” You drop your head back. “My back fucking hurts so bad.”

He laughs, “need some more pills.”

You shake your head, “I’m fine. Just...” you close your eyes. “Shh.”

You wait for it. Steel yourself for it. Another smart remark.

It doesn’t come. Instead, the tub thrums and a jet sprays right against your hip. You moan without meaning too. Oh, that’s nice.

Still, he doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t gloat about the fancy tub or the noises escaping you. You cling to that peace, that rare instance when you can just be. Not an employee, not a wife, not a mother. Just a woman basking in a moment’s peace.

🗄️

“Mom,” Simone’s voice breaks through the darkness.

Your eyes snap open. Panic swells over and you lift your head with a confused blink. You stare at your daughter then look down at yourself.

You’re in a fluffy black robe. Not your own. It’s a bit bigger and much softer than any of yours. A blanket drapes across your, pulled up to your waist, and a cushy pillow sits under your head. Your eyes scan the room. You’re still at Hansen’s but how did she get there?

“You were sleeping. Tried waking you up but... figured you needed it,” he puts his hands on his hips.

You glance at him as Malik appears at his sister’s side. His eyes are round.

“This creep showed up at the school,” Simone says.

“Hey,” Lloyd frowns. “I’ve been nice, you know? You could try.”

Simone rolls her eyes and shifts her bookbag on her shoulder. “Where’s dad?”

“He’s...” you hesitate, sorting through your foggy thoughts. “He’s got his meeting. Sweetie, why don’t you read your book? I just need to wake up.”

“Mommy,” Malik pouts.

“Come here,” you pat the sectional beside you. There’s more than enough room.

Simone drags her feet away, “when are we going home?”

“Soon. I’m just... I went to the doctor. I should be okay soon.” You explain.

Lloyd paces listlessly as Simone sits in a velvet chair. She curls her lip at the decor before she digs in her bag for her book.

“Well, you need anything, kiddo? A snack?” He offers, his voice uncertain. You could laugh. He’s really clueless.

“First, don’t call me kiddo,” Simone says. “Second, don’t talk to me when I’m reading.”

You should tell her to be nice but you won’t. Malik climbs up and sits against your stomach. You lay your head back down and yawn.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get you all home in one piece,” Lloyd declares. You squint. He’s trying a bit too hard.

“Right,” you pat Malik’s leg and turn, planting your elbows to haul yourself up. The pain is duller but still there. Manageable.

“I can put something on for the boy?” Lloyd grabs a remote. “Those freaks in their coloured shirts or that annoying cartoon dog.”

“Sure,” you say. “Mal, I’ll be right back.”

You angle yourself around and grunt as you get to the edge. Simone peeks up at you. You frown.

Lloyd flips through the streaming guide and finds some childrens’ show. He hits play. He puts the remote down and approaches. He offers his hand and you push him away.

You stand and whisper, “where are my clothes?”

“Bathroom. The half-bath down the hall,” he points.

You glare at him, “you should’ve woke me.”

He shrugs. You shake your head and shuffle out. At least you can walk.

You find the half-bath and your clothes are waiting. You dress lazily. You do your best to tidy your appearance before you emerge. You can call a cab.

As you open the door, you flinch away from the figure waiting outside. It’s Simone. She scowls at you.

“Oh, hi, honey, everything okay?”

Her lips downturn further. “You’re cheating.”

You blink, gasping as if she’s slapped you. “What?”

“You’re cheating on dad.”

“Honey--”

“It’s gross and you shouldn’t have let him bring us here--”

“Honey, no, that’s not--”

“I know. I can tell. I’m not stupid, mom,” she snarls. “And I’m going to tell dad.”

You shake your head, “sweetie, things are complicated right now--”

“It’s nasty. He’s nasty. Mom! How could you choose him?”

“I didn’t--” You shudder, “baby, you don’t understand.”

“I do.” Her face turns to stone. “And I hate you.”

She turns and stomps off. You stare after her, paralysed. You touch your chest, the breath trapped inside, and you whimper. She’s twelve. You can’t explain this to her, but what do you do?

You go to the living room, “where’s my phone?”

Lloyd looks confused at the TV as the cartoons put spaghetti on cotton candy cones. You don’t understand those shows either. He peeks over at you.

“Huh?”

“My phone. I need to call a taxi.” You hiss.

“I’ll drive you. It’s no problem. I was just going to order dinner--”

“No, Hansen. You’ve done enough. I’m taking my children home.” You insist.

“Watch yourself,” he warns.

You grit your teeth, “Malik, come on, let’s get your shoes.” You cross the room and grab the remote, shutting off the TV. “My phone, now.” You shove the remote into Lloyd’s hand.

He stares you down, “what did I do this time?”

“I have a husband. I have other things to worry about.”

He sighs and snatches the remote. He turns and slams it down. He grabs your phone from a black tray on the console table. He gives it to you.

“Well, seems you’re feeling better. I’ll see you at work.”

“You will, Mr. Hansen,” you sneer.

You go and grab Malik’s hand. You take him off the couch and into the entryway. You look around. You go to the door and peek through the window. She’s sitting on the front step with her book and bag.

You get Malik’s shoes on and grab his knapsack. You gnash down on the pain fluttering in your lower back. You let yourself out.

“Sim, let’s go. Cab’s coming.”

You quickly order a ride through the app and mourn the unnecessary cost. You stand beside her on the top step. She gets up and looks pointedly away from you.

You wait in a silence only punctuated by Malik’s clueless questions. When the car gets there, you make sure the kids are buckled in and ride in the middle seat. The way home is much too long.

You wallow in resent. You deserve that. Simone is so much like you and that makes you both proud and sad. She’s stronger than you in ways but you don’t want her to be damaged by this. You don’t want her to be as cold as you’ve become.

You tip the driver on your phone before you get out. You heard Malik up the walk as Simone stomps to the front door. You unlock it and she charges inside. She kicks her shoes off on the mat and continues onward. You don’t stop her.

You put Malik in front of the TV with his cars and go into the kitchen. You focus on the simple task of figuring out dinner. It’s thoughtless as your mind spins. You did this. Not Pete. Not Lloyd. You. You let it all happen.

You were too weak to find another job. Too weak to stand on your own. And you can be as mad as you want that Pete did it first but it doesn’t absolve you of your own actions.

Simone deserves a better mother. Malik too. And you deserve every ounce of spite coming your way.

#pete brenner #lloyd hansen #same as it ever was #mama bear

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alicedopey · 20 hours ago

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You will truly be missed but I understand your decision. Take care of yourself and do what’s best for you ❤️

Hi everyone! I don’t want to make this a big thing, I just want to come out with it and be upfront instead of ghosting off again and let you all know that I am not going to be posting or writing fics any longer - or at least not any time in the near future. I won’t be around here very much if at all but I will be leaving all my fics up (with a few exceptions) for the time being. I’ll try to get everything up on ao3 (nickfowler) eventually as well.

It’s been such a pleasure being around this community here and sharing my writings with you guys, and I want to say thank you for every kind word you may have ever sent my way. It’s been fun, and maybe I’ll see you around here again one day. I know I’m going to be missing all of this the second I really step away but it’s something I just have to do right now.

Sending love to each and every one of you. And apologies for all the stories going left unfinished here - if I come back around to writing again, I’ll be sure to get them up on ao3. I obviously can’t really do anything to stop anyone but I sincerely ask that you don’t enter any of my stories into any kind of ai program to get a finish; if you really want a good ending I would love you to write or imagine your own! And more apologies to all the asks going unanswered, too. It was never, has never, and will never be my intention to ignore anyone for any reason so I hope you know any ask I never answered was never maliciously ignored, I just always forget to go back to asks and I’m really sorry about it!

I love you all and I wish you absolutely nothing but the very best that life can offer. I don’t really wanna say such a definite goodbye, so I’ll just say goodbye for now. 🩵

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alicedopey · 1 day ago

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Nick fucked up real bad. She is tired of being used and she doesn’t care about his fake concern. This story wasn’t supposed to be this angsty but the muse did not want to go elsewhere so…😅

Thanks for your unconditional support, Zombie 😘