#great meltdown of 2024

[ennobaka]

Dude fr though I don't know what to do about this fear of the future thingie if I'm in the vicinity of people talking about their future plan I wanna cry

[allylikethecat]

talk shop tuesday question: how are fictional adam and fictional ross dealing with the on a friday situation? are they rooting for matty and george to figure things out?

YAY Happy Talk Shop Tuesday! Thank you for sending this one in! Fictional!Adam has found himself with a front row seat to the disaster that Fictional!Matty currently is (since Fictional!Matty is currently camped out on his couch) and he can see first hand just how miserable and unwell he is. He just wants Fictional!Matty to get better, whether that be by confronting the Fictional!George situation or something else. Fictional!Ross is more detached from the situation (and Fictional!Matty has been keeping his distance as well since Fictional!Ross is an alpha but not the *right* alpha) but he is pretty sure that Fictional!Matty returns Fictional!George's feelings, even if they're both too dumb to do anything about it at the moment! Overall, both of them just want their friends to be healthy and happy - preferably together!

Thank you so much for sending in this ask and for reading! I hope you enjoyed todays On a Friday chapter! I hope you had a wonderful Tuesday and that you have a great week!

❤️Ally

[slutforpringles]

"I take this as confirmation of Daniel. Ultimately, I have reason to believe that he signed that contract [for 2024] at Silverstone a couple of days after the British Grand Prix. I think it was locked in at that point, having spoken to his manager a few times during that period, although Blake would never tell me. Yeah, all I’ll say is that his dentist does an excellent job because he did a lot of smiling. Must have taken a leaf out of Daniel's book on that one. But yeah, there was quiet confidence there for a long time, but it was great that we have that confirmation now.

And it also explains why Red Bull has not been in a hurry, why Daniel hasn't been in a hurry to jump back in that car and to really rush things with his recovery because he's never needed to. He's confident in that he knows his future. Right now, the best thing that he can do is put himself in the shop window next year. This year doesn't matter. So just get yourself right, get yourself back to full fitness, or very close to it, so that anything that's happening in his hand doesn't impact his driving, doesn't detract from his driving, because doing that, all he's doing is setting himself up to make that job harder. His sole job now is to impress Helmut Marko and Christian Horner to the point where it's a no-brainer for them come this time next year. Yeah, that's his sole job. He doesn't need to do anything else, everything else between now and then is a bonus."

-Mat Coch on Speedcafe's Pit Talk Podcast | Oscar Piastri's big week ends on the podium; Red Bull Racing wins the teams title: Japanese GP review

The hilariousness that the collective meltdown over Daniel getting one of the AT seats when it was announced last week was all for nothing - since it turns out he most likely signed for 2024 back in July so it's literally been his seat all along (as most of ricnation have been saying this whole time). Also YAY for Blake!! We stan Daniel's stage mum/boss/minder.

[queridaz]

sorry, i'm, like, spiralling and y'all are gonna witness it bc i need to vent to prevent a meltdown <3

i reeeeeeally don't want to leave but i'm also v happy to not have to 11th wheel anymore

[0oolookitsme]

It's Buzzcut Season, Anyways!

Eeeeekk!!!! Hi Hi everyone!! I hope you are all doing well, here comes the first post of the year! <3

So.. It is my birthday today, and I'm very excited to tell you that I'm introducing to you, another one of my pairings! This a little excerpt from the fic (wip) I'm writing about this chaotic pairing, and I really do hope this gets you as excited about their story, as I am! This was supposed to be up in December but for some reason, I didn't post it?? Anyways, other than that, you shall see more, further on in 2024 :)

Also, shoutout to @cupid-styles and @elioslover for picking my ice hockey!Harry to be the one to get a buzzcut, hahah! My indecisive self (who lowkey wanted you guys to pick him), could've never 💗

All the love always, A.

Verse - NHL Player!Harry x Figure Skater!Y/n (uni era)

Word Count - It's just an excerpt so it's short!

Warnings - None that I can find but if there are any, do tell me and I'll edit them into this!

Y/n is reluctantly trimming Harry's hair when her nose feels funny, and she sneezes. Its good though, that Harry asks for her opinion regarding a change that he would rather appreciate.

Please rb to share! | Masterlist

Y/n sat on her unmade bed, hair unbrushed and messy since she woke up from a 3-hour nap. Her fingers typed away on her laptop, her face showing zero signs of any stress regarding the assignment she's going to have to turn in un-edited.

Probably because of the breakdown she'd had before taking nap. She'd been so stressed that she had drawn blood from her lips and broken two of her nails -- which was rather disappointing to her considering she'd got them done not so long ago in the honour of the upcoming season of winter.

The temperature was still as hot as summer, but half of the world was snowed in, and she wanted the peace of mind that winter brought her; so, she deluded herself into thinking that it was indeed her favourite time of the year.

A silent burp made its way up her throat, as she drank the day-old diet coke she'd been drinking before her meltdown-that-leads-to-an-amazing-nap.

Just as she slurped on the last sip that wasn't anything but melted ice, she heard the door to the flat open and her eyes rose up just in time to catch the sight of a sweaty and out of breath Harry, through the open door of her room.

"Y/n?" He called for her, walking towards her room when she only hummed in response. He passed her an apologetic smile on reaching her doorframe, and she knew he was going to ask something of her that the both of them know she wouldn't be willing to do quite easily.

"I need your help," he grinned at her. "...And Immediately."

She looked at him suspiciously, before deciding to shift her focus back on her assignment, knowing that he would lure her in if she were to continue looking at him.

But Harry was at once kneeling beside the side of bed she was sitting on. With his hands joined, he contorted his face in a way that looked like he was about to cry. "I beg of you, please! If you don't help me right now, my life will be ruined forever!"

Y/n's eyes had fallen into untrusting slits by now as she minimized the document that she had been writing in. "What is it, Harry?" She asked him in a monotonous tone, shutting her laptop as if procrastinating the essay any longer would be a great help.

"Cut my hair."

Instantly her jaw dropped open. Shaking her head, she began reopening her laptop and Harry took a hold of her wrists. "Harry, there's no way!" She yelped as he began making her get off the bed.

"I'm not asking you to give me haircut like Zayn!" He exclaimed, as if that'd ease her. "Just trim it a bit," he shrugged, walking out into the small living-room with Y/n thrashing behind him. She even threw a few hands at him, but he had a feeling that she wasn't as opposed by the idea as she was pretending to.

He pulled out a chair in front of the mirror that, though they had been living in this flat for nearly two months, had yet to be pinned to the wall. "C'mon, you work at a salon -- surely you know how to trim a guy's hair," he teased her, knowing that questioning her abilities would get to her and she'd cut his hair better than any hairdresser ever could.

Looking at her reflection glaring at him through the mirror, he winked at her before bending down to unzip his bag. He pulled out an electric trimmer from inside it and handed it to her, pulling the towel from the coffee table that he had left there earlier in the morning.

Once done draping it over his shoulders, he handed her the trimmer and added a touch of his puppy-dog eyes even though he knew they simply don't work on her.

"Okay. If you end up bald, don't complain then," she grumbled before running her hand through his hair. "Is this sweat or did you wash your hair after practice?" Her face was already contorted in disgust, like she knew he surely couldn't have done the latter.

"Don't you worry, I washed it after practice," he assured her, looking at her as if she should appreciate him.

She turned on the trimmer and held his hair in sections by one of her hands. "Why didn't you go to a salon?" She asked him, trimming the hair on his sides with her mouth parted.

Harry shrugged and immediately retorted when Y/n shrieked, mumbling an apology. "The salon's too far. I don't have the time to get there; got a handful of assignments to turn in before midnight." He told her. "And I mean, saving some money never hurt anyone."

"You do realize that I've put doing my assignment on pause to do this silly shenanigan with you?" Her eyebrows rose up as she fired another question at him. She suppressed a smile when he passed a dimpled-lopsided grin to her. "God, I hate you," she said, and a smile slipped on her lips as she moved to the other side to trim the rest of his hair.

She had no reason to be doing a parttime job at a salon, it wasn't going to help her in the future in any way, but it did help her in the present with its money. The money she got by being apprenticed to a dance company went straight into the flat-bills and some other necessary purchases that she couldn't avoid.

But she wasn't complaining about it. Living among frat people was a nightmare for her. She did have fun with people but being a clean-freak and a morning person didn't match well with the frats. They did love her dearly, but when Harry came in asking if someone would be willing to be his flat mate, everyone had chanted for Y/n. And, when he asked Y/n at the rink, she had quite literally jumped at the opportunity and in the joy of the moment, hugged Harry with a tight grip that still had his heartbeat rise whenever he thought about it.

With her touching his hair, Harry's heart was beating so hard in his chest that he was afraid it was going to break a rib. His eyes never once left her reflection in the mirror, not with the way she was being so careful and serious. Her lips had parted without her knowing, and she wasn't even blinking often enough.

That was when Harry saw a hair-strand fall in her face, and her face scrunch up in a way it does when she's about to sneeze. He saw as she turned to sneeze in her elbow -- a habit that she still hadn't gotten rid of. He shifted his gaze down on his hands in his lap, to prevent her catching him staring at her.

When Y/n caught her breath after the sneeze, her eyes grew wide. Her hand began shaking as she brought the other hand to cover her mouth, looking at his head in horror. She wasn't sure if she should laugh or begin spewing apologies and decided on the latter one.

But as she opened her mouth, Harry looked at her. "Should I just buzz it off?" He questioned her and thought that she had paled at the thought of him going bald. "I mean, the match season is finally over. I don't have anything to do but study, do my parttime and of course practice hockey." He shrugged explaining his point of view, looking at her to help him decided.

"S-sure! I mean, you'd look good with any-any type of haircut." She was shaking and stuttering, but Harry was too lost in his train of thoughts to question her. "A-and its buzzcut season, anyways!"

That seemed to be helpful for Harry. He smiled at her, "Shave it off, then. I'm basically on vacation from tomorrow... and I guess I'd really appreciate a change like this!" He was back to grinning and Y/n's sweat was beginning to cool off.

She imagined sitting with Harry on a sofa on some ordinary-night with her feet in his lap like he were her closest friend and telling him about today -- a movie playing on the lowest volume possible in the background. She stopped herself before she could get lost thinking about his reaction and mess up even his buzzcut.

[coimbrabertone]

Motorsports Christmas: An After-Action Report.

May 26th, 2024 was one of the biggest days in motorsports, and it was freaking exhausting in the best ways possible.

So, everybody knows that the Monaco Grand Prix and the Indianapolis 500 are on the same day, well, the Charlotte 600 is on that day too, making for the triple. This year, the Catalan Motorcycle Grand Prix also fell on that weekend, so there was a quadruple of racing, and I was ready to watch it all.

I woke up around 5:30am - the joys of the Mountain Time zone - in time to watch MotoGP at 6am. Aleix Espargaro took pole on the factory Aprilia and Raul Fernandez on the Trackhouse Aprilia satellite bike lined up third, but it was Pecco Bagnaia in second that turned into the protagonist of the race. Bagnaia held off the likes of Jorge Martin, Marc Marquez, and Aleix Espargaro behind to take a calculated victory.

I was happy for Bagnaia, however, with Jorge Martin in second having a dominant championship lead, it did sort of feel like a pyrrhic victory. Bagnaia gives this controlled, smart victory ride but it doesn't really matter since he only scored five more points over his main championship rival. Add in the fact that Marc Marquez, who is toe-to-toe with Bagnaia in the fight for second, finished third. This means that Bagnaia leaves the Catalan Grand Prix 39 points behind Martin and just 2 ahead of Marquez.

That's not even the worst part.

Enea Bastianini - the rider I support - kinda had a meltdown this race. First, he starts eleventh, loses places off the start, and then got pushed off at turn one by Alex Marquez. Enea cuts the track to rejoin, receives a long lap penalty, refuses to serve it. He then gets gets pushed off again in a second attempt. Enea receives a double long-lap penalty for failing to serve the penalty, serves one but not the other, and then gets a thirty second penalty post race.

In his interviews, he called it a protest against unfair stewarding decisions.

On track, it led to him finishing eighteenth and out of the points.

This is particularly devastating as Jorge Martin and Marc Marquez - the guys in second and third - are fighting to take his seat for 2025. I already did a blogpost about this a few weeks ago and I have a lot to get to today, so I'll keep this brief, but yesterday was not a good day for Enea Bastianini.

The Monaco Grand Prix also happened. Swiftly moving on...

Joking. I'm joking. Monaco was actually pretty good this year. The Ferraris and McLarens qualified 1-3 and 2-4, respectively, so we got a fight between them rather than Red Bull dominance. Unfortunately, they decided to fight by going as slow as possible to prevent anyone else from pitting once they all got a free change of tyres under red following a scary first lap incident between Sergio Perez and the two Haas cars.

Still, it was a fight between Ferrari and McLaren and the top seven all put a lap on eighth place. That was as vintage F1 as you could get. It was also at vintage speeds with them running around four seconds off the pace, but hey, strategy shenanigans are fun.

Charles Leclerc won and proceeded to drop the Monegasque flag in front of the Prince of Monaco, twice. That is objectively funny and probably my favorite F1 moment of the weekend.

So, the Indianapolis 500.

Normally it would start shortly after Monaco, however, a rain front in Indianapolis delayed the 500 into the afternoon. This would wreck Kyle Larson's attempt to do the full 1100 mile double at Indy and Charlotte - more on that later - but it did actually lead to some great moments for me personally. Spending the hours in discords with other motorsports fans talking about when the rain might stop, when the track might dry out, when the race should start, whether Larson would stay or go...it all gave a very wholesome, community feel that I really enjoyed.

Then the race itself. It was amazing.

The clouds cleared, we got a partly cloudy afternoon with filled grandstands and a full 500-mile race around the Indianapolis Motor Speedway. We got a little bit of everything. Crashes (where thankfully nobody was hurt), engine failures, competing fuel strategies, sixteen different leaders - that's half the field! - and a last lap, penultimate corner pass for the win.

Now, I'm an Arrow McLaren fan. Alexander Rossi was a driver who I followed in F1 because I was excited at the prospect of seeing the first American driver in a decade. Rossi's F1 hopes with Marussia didn't work out, but he went on to Indycar and won the Indy 500 in his first attempt. Between the peak Andretti years where he had the knife between his teeth bringing the fight to the likes of Josef Newgarden and Scott Dixon, to now, where he's in that beautiful #7 white and orange McLaren, bringing the fight to the likes of...Josef Newgarden and Scott Dixon.

Then there's Pato O'Ward, the exciting, young, charismatic Mexican charger in the #5, driving an awesome orange and black car. It's perfect, he and Rossi have night and day cars, and they were slingshot passing each other in the Indianapolis 500 to save fuel. That was the happiest I was during the race, watching my two favorite Indycar drivers in my favorite team leading 1-2.

Then Alexander Rossi made his final pitstop for fuel.

They were racing to keep track position, so they fueled him just a bit short, and I fear that ultimately decided the course of the race.

Josef Newgarden cycled out in front at the end of the fuel cycle, Alexander Rossi attacked first, got in front, but immediately got overtaken again as he had to save a bit of fuel. Rossi would try again, but Newgarden would nose ahead, as would Pato O'Ward.

Pato O'Ward was a student of the Indy 500, so he knew he had to make the pass as late as possible to ensure that Josef Newgarden wouldn't be able to respond. Pato would lift in turn one on a number of final laps to stay second and keep the draft, before finally making the attack in turn one on the final lap...only for Josef Newgarden to come back at him in turn three.

There was nothing Pato could've done at that point.

Josef made the pass in turn three, got a good exit off turn four, and Pato didn't get enough of a draft to the finish line in order to stop him. Pato was rightfully devastated, Rossi ended up in fourth, behind the lead two in addition to third placed Scott Dixon, as a result of his fuel strategy.

It was utterly devastating.

But that's motorsport. The days that you lose are what make the days that you win more meaningful. The Indianapolis 500 happened in its entirety despite all the rain and the worries. Not only that, but NBC is saying that the preliminary ratings look to be over 5 million viewers for the race. A last lap pass, a back-to-back winner, and a ratings bump over last year. As much as I wish Pato or Rossi could've won that race, I've spent the last day making my peace with it. For now, I'll just be happy that Indycar as a sport snatched a victory from the jaws of defeat.

Then there was the Coke 600 at Charlotte.

I tuned in late thanks to the late Indianapolis 500, and I was pretty emotionally drained at this point, but a charge from Brad Keselowski at the end of the second stage got me motivated again. Brad Keselowski, the owner-driver of the #6 for the team I support in NASCAR - Roush Fenway Keselowski Racing, also known as RFK Racing - pushed his way up the field. He moved into second, and he was hunting down the leader, Christopher Bell.

I began to believe that, after a 1,113-day winless streak, Brad Keselowski would win two races in three weeks.

Unfortunately, as soon as he caught up to the back of Bell, it started raining.

To add insult to injury, Kyle Larson, who had run the Indianapolis 500 earlier that day and completed all 500 miles, finishing 18th after a pitlane speeding penalty, had just arrived at Charlotte. He was about to take over the #5 from replacement driver Justin Allgaier, only he never got the chance.

At this point, I was emotionally drained after three and a half races, so at around 8:45pm, I fully embraced my grandmother era and went to bed.

That wound up being the right decision, because despite waiting out the rain and attempting to dry the track, NASCAR would end up calling the race anyway when they hit the end of Fox's TV window. Christopher Bell would win the race, Brad Keselowski would have to settle for second.

I quite literally missed nothing by going to bed when I did.

So, I sorta got the result I wanted at Catalunya, a full-on positive result at Monaco, and narrowly had my picks finish second at both Indianapolis and Charlotte.

In the grand scheme of things, that's not a bad Motorsports Christmas.

And on June 14th and 15th, we have Motorsports New Years with the 24 Hours of Le Mans, so the Racing Holidays aren't quite over.

[growwithmeastrology]

Friday, August 23rd 2024

Sun in Virgo ♍️🌍 Moon in Aries ♈️🔥and Taurus ♉️🌎

Mercury Trine Chiron

Use your words to heal and connect. That’s what Mercury (rx) in Leo trine Chiron in Aries is all about. And it’s not just about talking, it’s about saying things that matter. Your words are received well and with more understanding under this influence. Heal and inspire others to do the same.

Moon Trine Mercury

The Aries Moon will give Mercury (rx) in Leo really nice support today. Your mind and heart could actually be on the same page. You could also get some mental clarity that can help cut through the fog of this retrograde. It’s a really great day for heart-felt conversations. This one can also boost your creativity.

Moon Conjunct Chiron

The Moon and Chiron will then meet up in Aries turning up the volume on emotional baggage. Old wounds can surface but they’re coming up for a reason. It’s time to clear. This one can also really boost your intuition.

Moon Enters Taurus

The Moon shifts from fiery Aries to sensual Taurus and it’s time to savor the sweeter things in life. Treat yourself to your favorite things under a Taurus Moon. You can even indulge a little. Slow your pace down and find your place of comfort and stability. Self care is always a good idea.

Moon Square Pluto

Shortly after the Moon enters Taurus, she squares off with Pluto (rx) in Aquarius. We’re digging deep into the emotional vault again. This one could really have you battling inner demons. Take deep breaths if you’re feeling a little more on edge than usual. Arguments and criticism are seemingly everywhere. Work on having emotional break-throughs not meltdowns.

Sun Trine Moon

The Virgo Sun will give the Taurus Moon some support. After all the other emotional struggles of the day, this one can help you get through it. Everything seems to click under this influence. It may even restore your confidence. Harmony and connection can help strengthen bonds.

Mercury Sextile Mars

Finish off the day feeling like your own personal super hero. Everything starts to click again with your mind operating on all cylinders. This one can also make you feel adventurous or bring on sudden bursts of energy. It’s also great for flirty conversations or a little friendly competition.

Want to dig deeper?

Learn more about your energies and how the forecast personally affects you! Comment below or DM me for a consultation or birth chart reading.

Please like, comment, share and consider a gratitude tip in support. 🅿️ PayPal, Venmo or CashApp - @NaliniFlor

[jasper-book-stash]

June-August 2024 Reading Wrap-Up

Hey, sorry for disappearing off of the face of Tumblr for uhhhh three months, but I read twelve books in that time and I'm here to complain.

Religious Text

None applicable.

1/10 - Why Did They Publish This?

Moonbeams and Ashes: Tales of Mystery, Love, and the Paranormal | Margarite Stever

I picked this up from some bookstore here in Missouri under the local authors shelf. I wish I hadn't. These stories were all poorly written, and a good chunk had nothing to do with mystery, love, OR the paranormal. They weren't even bad in the fun way.

2/10 - Trash

None applicable.

3/10 - Meh

My Mother Road | Phyllis York

I picked this up from some OTHER bookstore here in Missouri under the local authors shelf. I wished this book had ended 480 pages sooner. The only highlight was at the end when the grandpa physically kicked a guy off of the porch.

Athena's Child | Hannah Lynn

A Greek myth "retelling" centering around Medusa and intercut with Perseus. It...was just mediocre. There wasn't anything interesting about what it did or changed or told, there was no taking the myth and running in a new direction with it, and worse of all we opted for the Ovid's Metamorphoses route but still used the Greek names for the gods.

4 to 6/10 - Mid-Tier

Crossword Poems, volumes 1 and 2 | Robert Norton

Two itty-bitty volumes covering what were apparently once commonly-known poems that you'd be able to remember based on half of the hint. Decent enough stuff, just kinda boring without that historical note.

Shelling Peanuts and Other Odd Odes | Howard Nelson

Another collection of poems that were ultimately mediocre with a few funny or insightful ones. Not bad, just not especially good either.

Songs of Honour | Noble House Publishers

These were, on the whole, better than the other two, but I knocked it down to 6/10 based on the fact that it took me the entire month of July and a third of August to finish. The formatting was lovely and each poem only took a page, but it was ultimately just "good-to-mediocre" on the whole.

7 to 8/10 - Good With Caveats

Outlaw: Champions of Kamigawa | Scott McGough Heretic: Betrayers of Kamigawa | Scott McGough Guardian: Saviors of Kamigawa | Scott McGough

While I personally listed Guardian as a 9/10, I figured I should keep the entire Kamigawa Cycle together. This is the story of Toshiro Umezawa, everyone's favorite fuckup self-centered protagonist dealing with the consequences of his and everyone else's actions. There were a couple times when something was referenced that didn't make sense in the setting (such as angels, Hell, or pixies), and you can definitely feel the "early 2000s white man writing a Japanese setting based on vibes alone" emanating from most of the pages, but I had a good time calling Toshi a dumbfuck over and over again.

9/10 - Very Very Good

None applicable (besides aforementioned Guardian).

10/10 - Unironically Recommend To Everyone

The Tale of Despereaux | Kate DiCamillo

In my book club, we randomly pulled this one as the one for all of us to read at the same time, and let me tell you, this book hits different when you're a queer young adult in your early twenties than it clearly hit the grown women in their 50+'s. Great book, absolutely adorable, and I love the fact that we accidentally timed it to coincide with the release of Bloomburrow.

Scaredy Squirrel: In a Nutshell | Melanie Watt

Yes, this is an Easy-level book. But somehow, this squirrel with anxiety and possibly OCD (yes, I'm projecting slightly, I kept going "he's just like me for real" aloud when I read it) is now one of my favorite fictional guys. And when he was having a meltdown, the other characters actually gave him space and respected his boundaries. Do you know how impossible that is to find in fiction? One of my favorite books now, hands down.

[ennobaka]

That was a whole lot of money just to hear I need to lose weight lmao

[tunedtostatic]

Blog updates 2024 edition, or more specifically, one big, potentially very good update: Last year when I did my 2023 blog updates, almost but not quite a year ago now, I said I might be within a month or so of things no longer being in serious crisis/my life being basically okay-adjacent. It is hard to write this even now but it turned out that that didn't work out - things did get better, especially for a chunk of six months in the middle of the year when I had safe housing and things felt wonderful compared to the last few years, but neither external circumstances nor my own ability to deal with {PTSD, external circumstances, &c} got to the point hoped for where I would be able to say "I'm living a life where things are more or less normal and okay." Even though I never quite reached things being okay-adjacent during that chunk of months and things got not great again end of summer to now, having that time of things being close to almost okay-adjacent was a very important springboard to me for make it to a point now where I might be within reach of actually okay-adjacent.

Right now, what I said last year about potentially being within a month or so of things being basically okay is potentially true again, and I think I have a better shot at it this time for both external reasons and personal "knowing more about what to do to get safe and having my shit together" reasons. I might be within reach of things being okay-adjacent and feeling like I have a real normal life outside of crises (here defined as safe housing, employment, no people hurting me in my immediate vicinity, financial and scheduling ability to manage physical medical issues on a day to day basis while still eating without mental health issues getting in the way of that, clothing in drawers not trash bags, nothing actively medically scary).

If so this will be for the first time since 2018 so of course it's a big deal to me. Right now of course I'm both excited and relieved things might work out soon and terrified that they won't.

Meanwhile (the reason beyond updating that I'm posting this!), as I get ready to fully move into the place that will hopefully be the "safe housing" part of this, it's been really hitting me that even though living a life that is normal-adjacent and okay-adjacent will inherently be orders of magnitude better than the last 5+ years and of course I'm prepared to be extremely grateful for that, I'm still going to have all the grief and emptiness I have now. Even though I will as always be (too) busy in some ways trying to get everything done in a day while dealing with chronic pain, no longer having so much time soaked up trying to survive whatever the problem of the week or PTSD meltdown of the day is means that I'm going to have hours and hours of empty time to fill every week.

When I talk about loss I know some people's minds will jump to the worst case personal scenarios so I will clarify that I am fortunate that by grief I don't mean the death of an immediate family member, not that kind of grief. A lot of different things - people who have been awful, deaths, horribleness in my neighborhood that was like family, lost time, and all the losses prior to the last few years in some ways since grief doesn't fully go away, and then things like a close friendship breakup last year that is not as painful as any of the above since we are both alive and managed to be kind to each other throughout the breakup but it's still over. It has been hitting me that a lot of the work of grieving everything from the past couple decades, like the work of dealing with PTSD, is what I had to get through these past couple years to have a chance of getting my shit together, but now that I've made enough headway on the work of grieving to be able to have a chance at my life being okay, the losses and emptiness themselves will still be there ("still be gone"?)

If anyone has suggestions for fun stuff to do, book and movie recommendations, &c, it would be a really good time for them! If anyone can recommend social stuff, e.g. friendly good-boundary-having discord servers, that would be amazing. I think y'all know my favorite things in fiction and music (fiddles, writing fanfic that comes to a screeching halt 2-3 times a chapter to talk about food, thoughtful meditations on torture?, swords) but I'm usually down to at least give media outside my wheelhouse a try.

[intoloopin-archive]

AN INTERLUDE: IN UNITY.

TWS: A rapist and drugs are very briefly mentioned. The boys are fighting. And I believe that's all. characters (starring): Na Seungsoo. Woo Gyujin. word count: 2,457 words. time stamp: January 21th, 2024 (the day Dylan released his mixtape). author's note: not exactly super beated because I am literally dying! But anyways! Transitionary piece to get this plot going! Productivety! Hell yeah! *passes out*

January 21th.

Seungsoo doesn’t miss LOOPiN’s old dorm because he can’t miss it.

So every time he gets close to airing a complain about their current house, he instead makes a point to remember that their former two story apartment came straight out of Jiahang’s pockets, rented with a fraction of one of his many, many trust funds set by his millionaire parents for when he grew up and decided to go to college to study rare plants, or be a nepotistic model, or move to Monaco and do nothing forever. It becomes very easy to cultivate a vendetta against it that way.

But right now what Seungsoo can’t help but miss is having a bigger balcony, one that won’t cramp him when he tries to have a peaceful and quiet meltdown in his own goddamn home. There's a breeze hitting him right on the face while he’s staring at the goddamn sunset but he still feels suffocated. And he’s only sharing space with Taesong’s outside plants, their leaves a depressing shade of sick green, and Haegon’s brand new bike, which he only bought because he wasn't allowed to get a haircut after leaving Sunyoung for the nth time. 

From behind him, Seungsoo hears the sound of the balcony’s door being quietly pushed open, and of a series of steps growing closer. The living room’s light has been turned on and it’s painting his body in yellow light.

“Haruki, look–” Seungsoo breathes, turning on his heels quickly, ready to raise his arms high in rendition.

Who he finds behind him is someone else, tough, someone worse – or maybe not. Haruki hates him now, romanticizes the living Hell out of Dylan now, so he would have certainly been way worse to look in the eyes now than Gyujin.

Gyujin who, with his brand new eyebrow piercing and wet hair from his one hour long shower, greets him with a smile then says, as if he’s queued to deliver a joke, “You wish.”

“Great,” Seungsoo mutters to himself, turning his back to him, getting back at supporting his elbows on the wall. For a second, he marvels at how nasty the fall would be if he jumped to the backyard. “Get out, Gyujin, seriously. I’m not in the mood.”

“Boo-hoo. I didn’t ask.”

With that, he comes close. He sits on the thick wall in the little space the plants give him, both hands holding on the concrete while he bends dangerously backwards, dangling his feet. 

And Gyujin just stays there, barely moving and not talking, only whistling like a goddamn cartoon. In retaliation, Seungsoo frowns harder at the horizon and begins to fidget on his sleeping clothes, fingers anxious to hold onto something.

He never picked up on smoking and he kind of regrets it now, can’t remember the reason why. Maybe because he likes to smell like cologne too much, or because he hates the thought of being unable to kiss someone without it tasting bitter.

It takes a mere minute or so for him to break, because that’s what Seungsoo does best: he can’t hold back an impulse, can’t swallow a single word down. He needs a collar, he’s realized recently, a muzzle, and no one ever gets him one – no one ever gets him.

“That was just so damn childish,” He mutters through his teeth. “Releasing all the songs like that.”

“Oh?” Gyujin tilts his squared chin down. He’s almost looming over Seungsoo, with the way he’s set – taking him from up above, an angle Seungoo’s had a problem being perceived from ever since he was the youngest of his mother’s kids. “And unfollowing Chihoon on Instagram wasn't childish?”

“I don’t like when any of our private business gets exposed, no matter how vague. He knows that.”

“Didn’t you just make it more public now with your little show? Or do you really think no one will connect the two, that the timing isn’t obvious, that you aren’t raising tension?”

Seungsoo suppresses a little scream by pressing his knuckles hard against his lips.

“You didn’t think that far, did you? Tsk, you just never do,” Gyujin lets out a laugh. “So what is it, Seungsoo, really? Why did you do that? What’s wrong with you?”

“What’s wrong with me?!” Seungsoo breathes, straightening up quickly, viciously – he almost hits Gyujin on the forehead with his head by doing so. “What is wrong with you?! Do you really think it’s okay for him to make something like that and release it without checking with us first?! When it’s mostly about the team?! We’re not illiterate! We can understand all his goddamn English!”

“Hm. Little League’s mean, I never said it wasn’t,” Gyujin agrees, but his relaxed posture lets it clear to Seungsoo that he does so only partially, half heartedly, even – always so comfortable with the possibility of a fall, he thinks, eyeing his horrible posture. “It’s a mock song made to piss Haegon off, and it got the job done. He’s justified in everything he chose to do about it. I just don’t get why you’re so offended. Is it because Chihoon didn’t write about you?”

“Are you insane? It’s not about getting a song or not, or Dylan doing things on his own or not, I just don’t–” Seungsoo shakes his head, searching for the right words, any other words but–

“You don’t like remembering we’re not friends,” Gyujin completes – spot on like fucking always. “That he doesn’t feel like he owes us secrecy anymore.”

And to think there would be a time, not even so long ago, where Seungsoo would immediately jump to refute him, banging on his chest and saying with real pride, “We’re all friends! We’re all close!”

But saying it now would just make it sound like a blatant lie; a joke with an awful punchline. So he bites his tongue and goes back to being quiet.

“Na Seungsoo, I need you to listen to what I’ll say to you,” Gyujin tells him, his voice set on a tone deeper than his usual, making the full name ring off his mouth like an intimation. Ungrundly, Seungsoo listens. “You need to start processing the things you do before you do them.”

Seungsoo scoffs, forced and loud, and looks away from his face quickly – runs from the ice underneath his setting jaw.

“We have problems, alright? All great groups do,” Gyujin keeps up, bumping their shoulders together once, then not again; Seungsoo recoils more against the wall and lightly grates his arm all to escape his follow up attempt by a matter of millimeters. “Sometimes things get sour and they spill over, and that’s just how it is. You get around, you know I’m right. No one has it easy. Idolmaker is in the middle of a PR nightmare with all the Hosung freakout, we’ve been seeing it first hand, and you won’t find Gayoung or Jeonghun getting petty in public because it isn’t smart.”

“So what can I actually do, Gyujin, about our situation?” Seungsoo asks him. A spot on his jaw is hurting from how hard he’s clenching it.

Gyujin gives him that awful, awful look of his that always tells him ‘You’re an idiot’. “Seungsoo, please. Dylan’s vent album is not a situation–”

“C’mon, Gyujin, I know it’s not!” Seungsoo says, too close to yelling. “And I know your little speech isn’t really about the goddamn unfollow! It’s you trying to get inside my head and control how I’ll act now that I know the group’s ending!”

The words make Gyujin pause. He almost fully freezes. It’s all the confirmation Seungsoo needs, the mute answer to the question that’s been eating him alive since Christmas.

“You’ve heard the fucking rumors, you– Gyujin, you know! I know you know! The March shareholder’s meeting has been canceled, Minwoo hasn’t sat down to write a real song since October, and Jiahang’s fucking dad called him back to China last month. For what?! He’s backing out, isn’t he?! He’s selling his shares because New Wave is dying. They’re going to debut the girls and just– fate out with us in it!”

Gyujin takes a defeated breath. Finally, he makes his way down the wall. “Sony hyung–”

“Don’t you Sony hyung me, man!” Seungsoo exclaims, angling his head up to fully face Gyujin, round eyes on round eyes. “Look, I know I talk even when I shouldn’t, I know my brain is goddamn slow, that it makes me do stupid shit, but why is everyone keeping things from me now?! I’m a producer too, aren’t I?! I’m a part of LOOPiN just as much as everyone, maybe even more than some people we got! Isolating me is fucked!”

“No one is isolating you, Seungsoo. Things are just complicated when it comes to giving you confidential information,” Gyujin counters, crossing his arms in front of his chest. His voice is again different, hitting at him cutting and terminal. It infuriates Seungsoo more. “And you know why that is. You put yourself in a hard position. Face it: you broke the trust. This is your own doing.”

Seungsoo’s mouth hangs open, stays open. “I broke the– what?! Why?! Because I pushed Jiahang once when he was about to do cocaine off an Inkigayo sink?! Because I took Dylan with me to haunt down a serial rapist?! I don’t regret any of those things, and I never will!”

“Was that all you did, really? Because the way I see it, the way it came across for everyone, was you going all vigilante over the members' private business,” Gyujin stresses. “And what good did any of these things do for anyone? You almost costed Jiahang his eye, Seungsoo. You almost got Chihoon arrested–”

“So now it’s all my fault?! We’re sinking, we’re doomed, and it’s all my fault?! Fuck you! You have no idea how or why– what do you even know about anything, really?!” Seungsoo spits at him, infuriated. “You just fucking got here, and– and you’ve been with us for a year and some fucking weeks, max! And it seems like everyone forgot that, that they all forgot that there was a time without you, but I didn’t! Do you even know what Haegon said, when he came with the idea of unfollowing Dylan?! ‘No matter what we do now Gyujin’s gonna fix it in the morning, so let’s do something dumb and tiny, so he won’t kill us!’ Like you’re in control or something! But news flash, this is New Wave Music, and you’re not in control, no one is! And if someone was, that someone would be me! Minwoo, Jimin, and me!”

“Or maybe not, now!” Seungsoo’s mouth keeps on going. He’s griping at the concrete of the balcony with one hand, pointing one straight at the center of Gyujin’s chest, and just letting a whole torrent out. “Maybe you do deserve trust more than I do! You– You know everything because everyone tells you everything, and you songwrite too, you can still play the tuba, why don’t you just take my fucking place, uh? If I get it all wrong and you do it all right?! Go be an executive producer, go on! Fuck writing all over just Beomseok, end me too! Minwoo likes you better anyway, maybe you can make his slump go away! Jimin fucking likes you better too, he won’t even mind me being gone, you might even get him to stop hiding Nicola from everyone, who knows!”

Seungsoo takes a shaky pause to breathe, his chest rising. He’s sure his face is red, that there’s a line of sweat on his forehead.

Gyujin remains too close and unmoving, his eyes semi close, analyzing.

“And what else?” He asks. He’s still grinning like he knows something Seungsoo doesn’t. “C’mon, go on. Spill it all out. I wanna hear it.”

“You sick–!” Seungsoo grunts, then takes another deep inhale, ends up almost choking on his own spit.

Coughing, he dismangles his grip off Gyujin’s shirt and forces himself to fall silent – they both do. Somewhere down in the street, a million cars honk and make out a disastrous symphony, and it pierces through Seungsoo’s ears like he’s in the middle of traffic. He’s minutes away from developing a killer migraine.

“So this is what comes out of you when you’re scared, yeah?” Gyujin eventually notes, quiet. Seungsoo can almost hear the tiny smile on his face stretching and growing warmer, showing just a flash of front teeth, white like a goddamn grain of salt. “Pretty animalistic reaction, although highly entertaining–”

“I’m not scared,” Sengsoo fires back, even though he is. He knows it deep in his bones, by the lack of good sleep: he’s terrified of blinking too slowly and missing any more warning signs, more sunny days; fearing they’re already all long behind him. He turns his head down. “Just, just– Tired of feeling– Tired.”

And feeling like I don’t belong, is what he thinks but doesn’t say: Like I’m not good at my job. Like no one will ever forgive me. 

He feels one of Gyujin’s warm hands setting over his shoulder, offering it a squeeze. This time Seungsoo leaves it there, allowing it to linger. “Hyung, I can see that. We all can. You’ve been putting on some crazy hours in the studio lately. We appreciate how hard you’re covering for Minwoo hyung. I might not have thanked you for that yet, so–”

“Spare me the prase shower, Woo Gyujin,” Seungsoo grunts, running a hand over his face, onto his hair. “Just tell me to fuck off now so I can go to sleep with at least one argument settled.”

“And make it that much easier for you? Ha, of course not,” Gyujin laughs, amused. “Besides, we’re not fighting, have never fought, and never will. You have nothing to settle with me. But I’ll give you space to gather your courage to face who you really should.”

“Fuck you,” Seungsoo says, just to be the one to get the last words as Gyujin’s walking back and away. It comes off sounding tiny and defeated, a little ashamed.

He doesn’t get that: as soon as Gyujin gets a hand on the door, he calls back, “And in the meantime…”

Seungsoo takes an annoyed peek over his shoulder to glare at him. “What?”

“Follow Dylan back, you fucking drama queen,” Gyujin says, rolling his eyes, grinning like the Devil he pretends he isn't. “And relax, okay? We’ll be fine. We always are.”

And he disappears behind the glass, pulling the curtains inside and turning off the light.

On the tiny balcony only Seungsoo and the never quiet city remain, looking as the sun goes down and down.

[lenbryant]

(LongPost) Joe Biden completely recast the 2024 election and Donald Trump can't handle it

Democrats were able to take bold action. Republicans are still embracing a fascist, who's having a full-blown meltdown.

Michelangelo Signorile

President Biden did something Donald Trump could never do: give up power.

He listened to members of his own party, people who weren’t afraid to speak up.

That’s the opposite of what happens in the GOP, where Trump silences anyone who challenges him with threats of political annihilation, the hallmark of an authoritarian.

And now, as Biden announced he was dropping out of the race while focusing on important issues for the remainder of his successful presidency, we can all get behind a historic candidate for president, Vice President Harris, someone who will energize voters and transform this presidential race.

Already, Democrats have raised a torrent of money from online small donors—over $50 million as of last night. It was the biggest online haul from small donors since 2020, showing the enormous excitement.

The Signorile Report is reader-supported. If you’ve valued reading The Signorile Report, consider becoming a paid subscriber and supporting independent, ad-free opinion journalism. Thanks!

Yes, these last few weeks and the process surrounding them were messy and drawn out, taking up precious time. We weren’t in agreement about what was playing out. Many of us went back and forth in the span of a few days—or even a few hours. It was also often enraging and heartless, as a sensational corporate media inflamed the discussion for its own purposes. I was certainly outspoken about that, as were many of you.

But we’ve come to a great place.

First off, the drawn-out process—which mostly was about Biden coming to a decision that certainly had to be made deliberately and with care—wound up benefiting Democrats and hurting Trump. He chose JD Vance, going full MAGA extremist and Project 2025-backed in his VP running mate selection. He was cocky and confident that Biden wasn’t leaving the ticket. He would have chosen someone who highlighted diversity or was part of the GOP establishment if he believed Biden was stepping down and endorsing Harris.

Better yet, Trump’s entire campaign and the entire Republican National Convention have been wasted, as they were focused on a candidate who is no longer running. He’s even now whining about having spent all his money on Biden. Poor baby.

We also seem to have dodged the suggestions of a “mini-primary” and a chaotic battle at the Democratic convention. There is simply no time left for that. As the days went on, more Democratic leaders came behind supporting Harris if Biden dropped out, as a consensus was built. It helped to alleviate fears of disunity and a party in disarray at an open convention in August.

There will likely still be an open convention and voting by the over 4000 delegates, as Democratic leaders heed the advice of those who say this shouldn’t be a coronation by the few hundred members of the Democratic National Committee.

But other potential candidates, named in recent weeks by those calling on Biden to drop out, took themselves out of the running. Governors Gavin Newsom, Wes Moore, and Gretchen Whitmer made that clear, while Governors Josh Shapiro and Roy Cooper quickly endorsed Harris, as did Cabinet Secretary Pete Buttigieg and Senator Mark Kelly of Arizona. They are all potential running-mate contenders, with Shapiro, Whitmer, Cooper, and Kelly reportedly under the most serious consideration.

So Harris will not have any real competition—even as Joe Manchin laughably announced he may re-register as a Democrat to run for the nomination, only to backtrack on the idea this morning—and Harris comes with a campaign war chest and, most powerfully, Biden’s endorsement, which the majority of delegates will surely honor. Already, at least five state delegations to the DNC announced they unanimously backed Harris as the candidate, as did all 50 Democratic state party chairs.

I know there’s lots of disagreement, angst, and sadness among many about the pressure put on Biden to drop out. I was in fact among those who two weeks ago were saying we needed to get behind Biden, as he’d made it clear he was not leaving the race and we needed to focus on Trump. And many were annoyed that the discussion continued even after Biden said he was staying in.

But I trust that almost everyone involved has been acting in good faith (except for the corporate media). Trump is an existential threat. Concerned people, from the donors and members of Congress to the rank and file of the party, had different opinions about what would be the least risky path. Many believed Biden should stay in, viewing that was less risky, while others pushed for a replacement, seeing that option as having less risk. And it was debated in the open for over three weeks.

This is where that’s all come now, and everyone should get behind Harris. And let’s be clear that it happened because Biden, and Biden alone, made a selfless decision to put the country ahead of himself based on data about the race and what he was being advised. That shows him to be a patriot in addition to having had one of the most successful presidencies in history, one which Harris, as a member of that administration, can build on in a new presidency.

Don’t buy all of the palace intrigue stories in the media about Biden “seething” in recent days at his beach house in Rehoboth Beach, Delaware, “digging in” and refusing to drop out—stories based on unnamed sources and reported even as late as Sunday morning, just hours before he announced he was leaving.

We now learn—from the same media that pushed those narratives, mainly the New York Times—that Biden was in fact preparing his letter to the American people announcing he was leaving the race all day Saturday, even as the reports of him being “dug in” were circulating well into Sunday afternoon just before his announcement.

Share The Signorile Report 

The president saw polling and other data that made it clear to him that he needed to make a move. Biden saved us from Trump in 2020, and he now passes the torch to a candidate who makes history, who would become the first woman and Asian American, and the second Black person, to become president. 

Biden is not stepping down because of cognitive decline—contra the ridiculous claims of those in the GOP now saying he can’t run the country if he can’t run for president—but rather because of shaky support in polls (in his case, because of a very bad debate that exacerbated the situation). This is what President Lyndon B. Johnson did in 1968—another enormously successful one-term president—and what other presidents did after they saw support dwindling. So it’s nothing new, and the president can certainly run the country for the remainder of his term.

This is a fresh start, and, as I said, the excitement is reflected in the amount of money Harris raised from small donors—and the big donors who were worried about Biden—in less than 24 hours.

And Donald Trump is very worried.

As I noted, he picked JD Vance, an extremist in his positions and a bit of a dud in his oratory and campaign skills, thinking Biden was the candidate. He stupidly listened to his two not-very-bright sons, Eric and Don Jr., who were charmed by Vance, who is a tool of the man who bankrolled him, tech billionaire Peter Thiel. The Vance pick was lauded by the leaders of Project 2025, who excuse Trump’s crimes and wouldl help him commit more as they work with him to consolidate power.

Trump again tried in vain to distance himself from Project 2025 at a rally on Saturday in Michigan, deathly afraid of the connection. And after Biden’s announcement on Sunday, he showed how petrified he is of Harris, already pushing back against debating her.

His fear drove him to write ugly, panic-laden posts on Truth Social attacking Biden and Democrats, which had critics saying he was “shitting his pants” in an overnight meltdown. Even the far-right Wall Street Journal editorial page criticized Trump in an editorial, headlined: “Trump Gives an Assist to Democrats: His reaction to Biden’s decision was small-minded and divisive.”

The 2024 election is Donald Trump’s to lose, and he may yet manage it.That was our reaction to his splenetic outburst on Sunday after President Biden’s withdrawal from the presidential race. It should have been an opportunity to show some class and judgment by welcoming the decision, warning U.S. adversaries not to take advantage of Mr. Biden’s last few months in office, and saying Vice President Kamala Harris will have to defend Mr. Biden’s failed record. Short and presidential, with a unifying tone. Not Donald Trump. On Truth Social on Sunday after the announcement, the former President posted this: “Crooked Joe Biden was not fit to run for president and is certainly not fit to serve—and never was! . . .” And on down from there.  We realize Mr. Trump is frustrated that he won’t be able to run against Mr. Biden. The biggest doubt voters have about Mr. Trump is that he’s a divisive, vindictive man who is unable to speak for all Americans. He had a chance on Sunday to show he was capable of more, but he didn’t rise to the occasion. 

Trump, of course, will never “rise to the occasion,” as he is incapable of it. The WSJ editorial page knows this, even as they hope against all hope.

And “frustrated” isn’t the word I’d use to describe his reaction to not running against Biden. He is, rather, immensely frightened.

Trump is now the oldest candidate in the race, one showing mental declineas he fumbles sentences, confuses names, makes non-sensical comments about “the late, great Hannibal Lecter," and is an overall rambling, low-energy mess. That was clear in his sleepy yet hateful and ultimately disastrous acceptance speech at the convention—and it’s why he’s not campaigning a lot—which completely upended the convention’s bogus unity theme.

Trump thought running against Biden, and using the media’s one-sided obsession with Biden’s age, would insulate him. Now he’s exposed, as all the focus will be on his fumbles in addition to his authoritarianism.

The entire MAGA world is, in fact, angry and fearful, railing on social media and attacking Democrats and Biden. And Trump’s campaign officials are worried. Per Axios:

Some of [Trump’s] advisers are quite concerned that a fresh, youthful, non-Biden ticket presents a bigger threat than Trump assumes…the Trump team's biggest concern, and some early polling flicks at why, is that Harris would help turn out more women, who historically vote in greater numbers than men. Harris, armed with Democrats’ abortion message, which worked well in off-year elections — could leverage the nation's gender divide.

Be fully prepared that they will be working hard to demonize Harris. Democrats have got to define her before the Trump and the GOP does. The good news is that she’s already a high-profile figure who has truly grown in he past year, on the campaign trail and in her public profile.

The contrast now couldn’t be clearer: a convicted felon and his enablers vs. a former prosecutor and her fighters for justice. It’s autocracy vs. democracy.

If some voters, as the polls suggested, disliked Trump but were reticent about Biden because of his age and the debate performance, they now have a new choice: a woman who will be making the case against Trump on reproductive freedom, racist bigotry, and democratic freedoms.

It’s time to rally everyone, get energized for this fight, and beat Donald Trump.

[iturbide]

Boops aside, I'm sorry to hear you've been having a shit 2024 so far, I can definitely relate😓

the boops are a bright spot I enjoyed them very much

but yeah it's been a pretty rough start to the year haha

(cut for life problems)

In general it's just been a very busy, stressful year, which has made it a real struggle to try and maintain work-life balance and avoid a breakdown. I've had a few weeks this year to date where I've felt about five minutes away from a meltdown, including my birthday week. Fun. 🙃

Then March opened with my grandmother passing away after several years of declining physical and mental health. She was 96, and had been in and out of the hospital several times just since 2024 opened, so I'd been low-key dreading the call for a while. We hadn't been close since I was much younger (we were very, very different people who just did not mesh well), so while it hurt, it was a more distant kind of sadness. Still: not great for the year.

But the current disaster hanging over my head is that I had a doctor appointment last month where they noted an enlarged thyroid, which proved to be from nodules on an ultrasound, which were identified by the biopsy to be fucking cancer. So now I have to have a second organ removed after getting my gall bladder yeeted last November, meaning I'm going to be getting two major surgeries in the course if six months. Thanks body. at least this time I have some warning before I go in for it

So yeah three months in and 2024's kind of a fucking shit-show. I'm mostly just trying to keep my head above water at this point and eke out some time for me, which means poking at new story ideas and crafting and trying to keep the kittens from destroying their new fountain. The bookbinding is back, too, and while this isn't quite ready to post yet, here's a preview:

but yeah that's been my year to date haha I would very much like it to improve. 😔

[thgfanfictionlibrary]

General Rated Fics Masterlist (8)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 /

Created: March 12th, 2024

Last Checked: —-

For The Longest Time-albinokittens300 (ao3) Summary: Katniss and Peetas first “kiss” after the Rebellion. Frost-Alliswell (ao3) Summary:In the kingdom of Panem, authoritarian King Coriolanus is coveting an Heir, everything changes when Jack Frost falls in love with a human girl from the small District Twelve, and tries to prove himself in order to become human permanently and win the heart of his beloved. Gale vs. Geese-DandelionSunset (ao3) Summary: On a trip back to District 12 after nearly 20 years away, Gale finds himself at war with Haymitch's territorial geese. While trapped in a storage shed, he reflects on the past and is greeted with the future. Hardly Strictly-Demona424 (ao3) Summary: None of Katniss’ friends could join her for the Hardly Strictly Bluegrass festival so she decided to go ahead and do it alone. I mean how could you pass up a free 3 day festival? But life isn’t what you expect it to be, especially when her dog steals some food from the handsome man sitting next to her. How Katniss made it to bed…-chele20035 (ao3) Summary: In MJ, after Katniss finds Buttercup back in District 12 and has her meltdown over Prim finally, it says she passes out (near the couch, I believe, where she was helped to, ) and regains consciousness in her bed that night. Is it canon that it was Peeta who did this? Greasy Sae? How did she get to her bed?  I am Buttercup.-Buttercupbadass (ao3) Summary: Buttercup's life has not been an easy one but with the lessons his mother taught him, he is a survivor. Buttercup tells his life story with darkness and light, great joy and sorrow I Never Said She Stole My Money-Alliswell (ao3) Summary: Peeta tries to convince his classmates that a pair of younger girls at the Campus, are innocent of the theft of his hard earned funds, using the phrase "I Never Said She Stole My Money" each time with the emphasis on a different word. Ich Mag Dich-HGfanonezillion (ao3) Summary: Johanna thinks her new neighbor is attractive. And once she recognizes the other woman speaking German on her phone, Johanna hatches a plan to win her over. If We Met Up at Midnight-c_r_roberts (ao3) Summary: There aren’t many reasons to celebrate in District 12. Even as a Victor. But the arrival of the New Year is one of them. Canon, pre-Victory Tour. It's like a house of cards-Brown_Eyed_Devil (ao3) Summary: Basically a really short piece with me trying out writing from Peeta's POV. Anyway it's just a little glimpse into what I think Peeta might have been thinking on the train, whilst on the victory tour.

[acertainmoshke]

Redoing the Intro One More Time!

Updated 9/30/23

Call me Moshke Palmoni (they/them). I spend as much time as I can writing, but that is not as much as it might be because there's also a lot of life going on right now. I also like to read, knit, collect vintage ephemera, and play with my cat.

General WIP tag list: [your url here!]

Active WIPs:

7 Days for Fae

Coming October 2024

10-year-old Fae is isolated by her disabilities—autism and ataxia—that causes her communication and mobility issues. She doesn’t have any friends her age, and she’s accepted that. She reads a lot and plays pretend in the forest at the end of the street. Her family loves her for who she is and so far that’s been enough. Until, that is, she meets the new kid. His name is Brownie and for reasons Fae can’t imagine he wants to be her friend no matter how weird or awkward she is. When he still invites her over after a meltdown in class gets her suspended for a week, she decides to take a risk and accept. The ensuing adventures are marred only by the other sudden change in her life—an aunt Fae barely knows has moved in with her family. She doesn’t know how to talk to Fae and, worse, refuses to accept Fae’s nonbinary parent’s identity. But since no one else seems to know how to deal with the mess their home life has become, Fae tries—with Brownie’s encouragement—to sort the situation out herself.

Cold Iron

In 1956, Shakatra Zoawin is 40. Or they might be 20, depending on how you look at it. They are a changeling and their aging is kind of weird, but that doesn't matter to them because they have a good life in the subway tunnel with their brother, Kris. Both of them are changelings swapped as infants for human children and then rejected by their human families. Their wits and powerful magic have kept them alive this long, and Shaka is perfectly content to keep going. After they do one little thing to appease their guilt: find the 40-year-old they were swapped for and free her to have her own life in the human world free from servitude in the courts of the Fae. And so begins an adventure that will have repercussions neither of them could have imagined.

Intro posts for the books in this series: Cold Iron, City of Frost, Song on Repeat, and Future Not Found

Character Intro Posts: Shakatra, Kris, Lynn, Tatiana, Liliana, Harry, Doug, Beth, Aaron, Cassie, and Althea

Tag list: @pga-books

Blades of Ice

In the kingdom of Halara, orcs and elms and slimes and centaurs live peacefully side-by-side with humans. Less peaceful is the relationship between Halara and their neighboring kingdom of Eng. The generation-long conflict has drawn in other nearby kingdoms and stagnated artistic and social works. All Aryel ever wanted to do was be left alone to love who they want and practice sparring with their axe, but as a royal child they have responsibilities, namely leading the entire army. There's no talk of ending the war in any way but victory, just as Halara won its initial freedom from Eng 300 years ago, but this endless fighting is getting them nowhere but too many funerals and not enough bread. And then when a familial tragedy leads to Aryel leading both the army and the kingdom, they know they can't balance the tensions and demands of everyone at once and win this war. Something has to give, and they just hope it isn't the entire kingdom.

Backburnered and still-in-planning WIPs under the cut.

Time Traveling Anthropologists

(permanent title coming soon)

Set approximately 2 generations in the future. Esther Dahan has her dream job. She gets to time travel with her new team, and against all historical odds they are there to study ancient cultures rather than do anything violent. Their first assignment is 8 months in the 9th century Jewish kingdom of Khazaria. Everything is going great—illicit romance with a Khazarian blacksmith notwithstanding—until Esther finds a plate that doesn't belong in this time. Curious and suspicious but without enough evidence to involve her boss, she investigates on her own, discovering much more than she planned—and leading to far worse consequences than she could have imagined.

Tag list: @amielbjacobs @kingkendrick7 @moonluringfrost @another-white-hole

To Die Among the Stars:

20 people have been chosen to test the effects of faster-than-light space travel on human minds and bodies. They were taken from prisons, wellness centers, and other areas where near-certain death seemed like a reasonable chance to take. Each have their reasons for being there, and their secrets. Against all odds, the jump to FTL doesn't destroy the ship. But the further away from Earth they travel, the more strange things begin to happen that call the purpose of the experiment into question. And then the impossible: a human distress signal in deep space.

Told from 4 rotating perspectives: Pixel, a semiverbal illegal human modder; Ri, whose body and mind are overloaded with mods; Zippy, a young disabled woman desperate to support her family; and Peppermint, a genetic experiment combining human and cat DNA raised in an isolated lab.

Tag list: @hd-literature

Falling Petals

A multigenerational story about trauma, love, and disability set against the backdrop of one Jewish family. Beginning in the 1920's with Ira Katz, who is brilliant and charming with no understanding at all of tact or why the best way isn't always blunt observations and mean jokes. It follows him as he grows up, marries, and inherits his father's drugstore, and then moves on to following one of his sons, Daniel. Daniel grows up in the 1940's and is naturally gentle, kind, and sensitive, but is treated so harshly for these traits he learns to hide himself away inside and only show emotion in explosive bouts of anger. It follows him through adolescence, college, and marriage, before moving on to one of his daughters, Shoshana. Shoshana grows up in the 1960's and is colorful, young for her age, and full of social panic. None of them know how to relate to each other or survive in a world that each of them see the beauty in but aren't allowed to connect with in their own way. And yet through the pain and confusion, they are full of love. And then everything changes for them with Shoshana's niece, Naomi, growing up in the 1990's, who will not be allowed to see herself as broken.

[johannestevans]

Happy new year!

Good evening, and happy Gregorian new year!

Firstly, the results of my giveaway - the winner has been picked, I'm just waiting for them to get back into contact with me, and everyone who didn't win did get some vouchers for eBooks, which I'm opening up into a little new year's gift!

Want an eBook copy of my slowburn historical fantasy romance between an ADHD vampire and his very autistic secretary? Get Heart of Stone on Smashwords and enter the redemption code XE97D!

Want an eBook copy of my more fast-paced and silly threesome novella between a deceptively experienced young gentleman, a harried naval sub-lieutenant, and the sexy pirate captain that kidnaps them both? Get Gerald Poole and the Pirates on Smashwords and enter the redemption code SF83E!

Enjoy, enjoy!

As I settle into my new place, I'm just starting on decorating and furnishing the place, so I've been picking up some old furniture and beginning to paint, which is great. I'm super excited to have a fully furnished space to work from, but in the meantime it's exciting to work on the process.

I'm still not back into my regular movie-watching vibe as I'm yet to have proper wi-fi in my new place, but I've recently been going between my rewatch of BBC Merlin (always a classic) and also playing Dragon Quest XI, and as for the latter, I recommend it so much. It's such a fun game that, as many of the DQ titles do, plays a lot with and pastiches a lot of classic RPG elements, but it's also so funny and also heartfelt and really loving about its characters, so big recommend.

A new month means a new set of prompts on Trans Erotica!

Prompts for January 2024

Modelling nude

Orgasm denial

In someone else’s clothes

Double-ended dildo

Against a wall

Inspired by a prompt to write a piece?

If you’re trans or nonbinary, submit to us!

There's no round-up of my most popular pieces of last month this email, as instead I did a 2023 round-up of all my most popular works already - my top fiction and non-fiction works of the last year are all laid out here.

New Works Published

Erotic Short: The Duelling Ground

Two old veterans use a duelling student as their shared toy. Rated E, 3k. Trans M between a trans M and cis M, with a duelling master fucking one of his students with a friend of his. Double penetration, anal and vaginal play, biting and nibbling, rough sex, squirting, a bit of breeding dirty talk, size kink, gaping, nipple and chest play.

Read on Medium / / Read on Patreon

Guide: Where do I find the queer people?

Making friends and finding social & community spaces as an LGBTQ+ adult.

Read on Medium / / Read on Patreon / / Read on Tumblr

Erotic Short: Good and Bred

Erotic short. A servant attends a warrior and gives him his first taste of sex with another man.

3k, rated E, cis M/ cis M. A warrior has never slept with another man before, and intends to top — his pretty little servant has different ideas, and cleaves him open. Featuring anal sex, massage kink, size kink, gender play, feminisation, some gaping, rough sex, D/s and power dynamics, role reversal, dirty talk, creampies, lots of breeding kink.

Adapted from a TweetFic.

Read on Medium / / Read on Patreon / / Read on Ao3 / / Read on Tumblr

Serial Update: Rescue Dogs

Chapter Fifteen. In the aftermath of therapy, Valorous has a bit of a meltdown, and Cecil is right there with him.

--

Cecil Hobbes finally gets Valorous King to try a new adventure: therapy. Cecil Hobbes, an ex-PE teacher disgraced and looked down on in his hometown, has a new partner: Sir Valorous King, a knight of the realm, once a child of prophecy, and Cecil’s stalker. A few months into their relationship, Cecil finally convinces Valorous to see a therapist, on the condition that Cecil attend one himself.

Read on WorldAnvil / / Read on Medium / / Read on Ao3