#gotta ramble
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it’s all coming together. i know why i’ve been leaning on being fem for so long. it is entirely her fault
#ek vents#gotta ramble#it starts when i approach my old friend group (including my ex) saying i want to try they/them pronouns in jan 2021#exactly a month later i come out to my mom as non binary#two months later i choose my name and come out to my dad#at that same time i get my hair cut short and absolutely love it#until i look at my body but we’ll get back to that#around six months later i start dating my ex#she calls me her boyfriend and i… don’t quite hate it#a few months later i ask to be called her partner. she refuses. i am labeled as her boyfriend#within the eight month relationship she does things to my body. in my room. decorated with pride flags#she calls me male terms which i grow to hate#i throw out the pride flags (give them to my trans cousin)#she constantly tries to enforce the idea of being fully male presenting. this hurts me#i start hating my body more than usual because who wouldn’t after that#i escape in october 2022#i lied earlier it was ten months. oops anyways#my ex starts to publicly shame me for my gender identity. everyone agrees with her#i stop correcting people on my gender and stop wearing suits#i grow my hair out#this continues until december 13 2024 when i realize that me being fem is due to Trauma#thank you and goodnight#that’s a lie i’m gonna keep posting
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The thing I keep coming back to, with all the *gestures expansively* is that real life doesn't have peaceful epilogues.
Every single win has to be defended. Forever. I'm sorry. It sucks. The Nazis lost until they stopped losing. The US had abortion rights, and then 50 years later it didn't. Empires fall, and then they invade other countries again. Oppressive regimes are overthrown and replaced with other oppressive regimes. You will never finish the work etc etc etc. Which is why it's so fucking important to be able to acknowledge and celebrate progress, when it happens. The people who came before you didn't put in all that work for nothing, and you aren't, either. You can't save it all for the Ultimate Victory because there is never going to be an Ultimate Victory. There's no such thing as a time when everything is good, and ours shall not be the commune of Heaven.
#rambling#like by all means always push for more#but man you gotta be able to note the small victories too#and you have to be able to step away for a bit when you need to because there's never going to be an Ultimate End#op
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If you're holding back on being masc because you think you need to be a skinny white man to pass, give that the fuck up. Be big if you're big, be brown if you're brown, be assertive, take up space, be whatever the fuck kind of man/masc you are and stop waiting. Stop trying to diminish your power out of fear.
#transmasc rambling#thinking of the not all of us can be twinks#somebody gotta be a bear#fat positvity#body posititivity#transmasc positivity#forcemasc#ftm motivation
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So. It’s no secret that the dunmeshi manga gradually changed art style as it went on (thereby twinkifying a few characters…) but I like to think that, in Thistle’s case specifically, it was also a change in perception by the party. I mean…
Early in the story, when all they knew about him was that he was the creepy, all-powerful mad sorcerer? Probably were much more intimidated by him. Same with the reader. BUT….
By the end? Oh, he’s just a little jester twink who writes poetry and can be picked up and slung around like a bag of potatoes. No way they could take him seriously anymore. Literally this meme but in reverse
Little guyification…
#polly speaks#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#dunmeshi#delicious in dungeon#thistle dungeon meshi#laios touden#here. have more unhinged thistle ramblings bc someone’s gotta do it#he’s literally so >:3 by the end it’s so so funny to me#I went from being like ‘huh. weird’ to wanting to pinch him cheeks
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jeez they really uhh nailed that intense gaze description from TN huh 😳
#dragon age#lucanis dellamorte#i gotta GO 🏃♀️💨#I was thinking about doing a charming lad to counter his ass but i dont even know if he will survive with a look like that LOL#disarming my rook from the getgo when HE was supposed to be the one disarming him#aev rambles
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smash???????? who said that?????????
engineer doesn't get enough love on this blog considering how much I cannot express my devotion to him, so I’m working to fix that :) this is similar to what I did for damien but it took foreverr!! iswm lighting is so so pretty which makes it impossible to get right ;;u;; the saturation is really high and there's multiple light sources so in terms of rendering it, its like it was personally designed to leave me dead on the floor :))))) either way,, I'm happy with how it turned out!! he’s very prettie :))
also bonus:
#kenna draws#markiplier#in space with markiplier#fanart#iswm#engineer mark#engineer markiplier#head engineer#in space with markiplier fanart#markiplier ego#markiplier egos#markiplier cinematic universe#markiplier fanart#iswm fanart#head engineer mark#don’t mind my little ramble :)))#gotta let the voices out sometimes!!!!#I have a captaineer fic I’ve been plotting for a long time and just finished writing chapter two#but I might have to shelf or rework it#plus i’m never sure what kinda stuff people would be interested in seeing yk!!#maybe I need a beta reader#but I got adhd and getting that feeling of accomplishment too early is the death of all my projects :)))#‘oop someone read it that means I’m done now’ yk im sayin#NE WAYS ENJOY THE ART
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i’ve been using my brain more than its used to
gonna think about gay mutant road trip hope my brain doesn’t explode
#i’m getting pissesed cause i keep missing words whenever i’m writing#i’m saying the sentence along in my head and my fingers glaze over words for some reason#i only notice the mistakes too late as well#since my brain hurts i’m gonna put that as a hc for charles#he had to keep going through his thesis trying to find the missing words#he gotta suffer with me#crying ughh#need to see cherik hold hands again#now i’m sad cause i remembered we could’ve had charles cradle erik as he died in his arms in dofp#your man is dying charles!#its still sweet the hand hold but 🙁#i need more expression in the hands they were giving me nothing#take the gloves off#gimme the same vibe as the one from god loves man kills#except they actually take eachothers hand#i’m using the last of my energy to ramble in the tags#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#x men#wish does not shut up
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Guilt tripping people does nothing but cause vulnerable folks to spiral and make folks who dont live with moral OCD feel negatively toward your cause
#gopher rambles#what the fuck do I tag this as#feel free to reblog but you dont have to#edit: pls not that im not saying 'only folks with moral ocd are negatively affected' or 'if these make you spiral you have moral ocd'#i mostly pointed that out because folks on this hellsite seem to only give a damn about things folks feel if theres a 'valid reason' to#which is shitty and stupid. but sometimes you gotta work with the shitty stupid shit to get your point across
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YOU - "Man, it sure is muggy out today."
LOGIC [Trivial: Success] - No it is not. It has barely been above freezing for the past week.
ENCYCLOPEDIA - In fact, 'muggy' is not a sensation that graces the isola of Insulinde often at all. For it to be muggy would require a sizable shift in the climate that surrounds you.
SHIVERS - Somewhere, northward, a Coupris Kineema is being taken apart, bit by bit, as a pair of young geniuses reverse engineer its creation. The blueprints-in-progress are lying on a damp crate, held by two heavy cans of beer. The wind tugs at them, to no avail.
KIM KITSURAGI - "Detective, if I go outside and there are mugs all over the ground, I *will* kill you."
EMPATHY [Legendary: Failure] - He's raising his Eyebrow. He might mean it.
ESPIRIT DE CORPS [Easy: Success] - No, he wouldn't. If nothing else, the paperwork involved wouldn't be worth it.
[COMPOSURE - Medium 10] Meet Kim's eyes.
[DRAMA - Godly 16] Convince Kim you don't know what a mug is.
Say nothing.
COMPOSURE [Medium: Success] - You raise your eyebrow back at Kim. Without breaking eye contact, you sip your coffee from a cereal bowl.
#senseless ramblings#disco elysium#i am absolutely not the first person to do this#but im late so i gotta catch up#kim kitsuragi#harry du bois#hof#1k
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silver♀ dump + fairy gala sil/prefect sillies..........
#some rambles but!!#sil ♀️ is more toned than sebe ♀️ cus i hc silver has a more defensive fighting style cus silver dorm uniform ssr is a def card 🕺🕺#this was gonna be my excuse as to why lilia is more buff thn silver too but#i checked again and dorm silver has a higher hp pool than dorm lilia😔💔#still giving lili ♀ gains thou bcs.. im biased HAHSHDJF#<- copypasted my rambles#basically the beef chart is lilia>silver>sebek>>malleus#sorree malleus kissers i think ur gurl barely has muscle definition ;-;#mayhaps. the only exercise mal does pre nrc is like. light morning jogs w lilia. bcs meemaw tells her exercise is healthy for herrr#or like. idk pilates or smth....#f i were to draw sebe ♀ in full her dorm uni i think she’d have a look that’s closer to the “standard” diasom dorm uniform#i draw my prefect too much.. i gotta draw vanilla twst stuff occasionally too...#but tbh!! my yuu has been acting as a watermark moreso or less#cant wait for the standee to be finished so i can have small silver n yuulis on my table... HEHHEHEHGRGHGH#twisted wonderland#twst#fairy gala#silver twst#should i tag him silver vanrouge#yeah#twst yuu#twst mc#twst oc#yuulis crowley#twst genderbend#night ladies college
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being a cg to a teen regressor makes me think about the endless opportunities of taking care of an older kiddo.
instead of monitoring and scheduling "playdates," i'm slipping a bit of cash to my baby when they hang out with friends, sending them off with a curfew and an embarrassing amount of kisses before they're out the door. or, letting them control the radio on road trips, rocking out all the while to the tunes.
it's also being a gentle yet firm guardian, from monitoring social media consumption to limiting energy drinks for their mental/physical well-being. but most importantly it's letting them feel heard when (despite being in an older headspace) words and feelings can still be hard to understand and communicate. its okay to feel frustrated or angry or upset at the world, you will always have the space to feel heard here because mama will always be right there for her baby with open arms.
banner refers to 18+ content! older regressors are always welcome to interact with me here
#sending so much love to my older headspace regressors!!#gotta think of a cg tag for the blog ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚#just mommy mode go brrrr /pos /lh#byunnieposts#byunnie rambles#agere#age regression#sfw agere#sfw age regression#cglre#sfw cglre#teen regression#teen regressor
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// taking care of your dogboy (hsr edition!) //
i. note — sry i havent been posting yall i got a job + ive been working on three cosplays at the same time bc my local con is coming up lmao (´ཀ`」 ∠) however the brainrot never stops. it only takes a break. a little break of approximatively. a month. ish. ......... anyways dog hybrid hsr boys brainrot !!! lmk if we want more of this with more boys •ᴗ• comments and asks are appreciated hehe ii. includes — blade, gepard, boothill and gn!reader iii. cw — slice of life stuff turning into smut, possessive behaviour, overstim, slight dom/sub dynamics, real messy stuff, manhandling. use of the word "hole" to keep reader gender neutral iv. wc — 1,9k
blade is a mutt riddled in scars and dirty bandages from living on the streets and fighting to survive.
you think he might be some german shepherd mix, but he refuses to let you swab his teeth n gums for a dna test (last time you tried you narrowly avoided a punch to the face. he apologized in his own way afterwards), so whenever people ask, just say he’s a rescue to avoid revealing that you actually just… don’t really know what breed he is. they usually drop the subject and simply go on their merry way, seeing as he wasn’t the type of pup to appreciate affection from strangers anyways– it’s rare for you to leave the house in the first place, though.
you had to switch to a remote job because blade is just so persistent when it comes to you. although possessive is a much better descriptor, because he doesn’t let anyone near you. whenever you leave to get groceries he ends up practically breathing down your neck from how close he gets— acting as if he were your literal shadow— glaring at everyone that gets too close to you. you’ve made it a habit to always go to self-checkout lane so blade doesn’t scare off the cashiers.
the second you get home he’s all over you, determined to rid you of that outside stench and replace it with his own. you started packing your grocery bags in a way that nothing will break if (read: when) you suddenly drop them on the floor, all because you’re so familiar with blade’s impatience.
he holds you still by engulfing your body with his, knees caging your hips as he grinds into you, shallow and deep. blade’s growls and huffs fill your ears just as much as his cock fills your hole, his knot kissing your tightness from the outside.
“do you like this? like how i have to fuck you every time you decide to go outside again when you could stay here,” with me blade omits, his tail swishing back and forth on the bedsheets behind him, the sound just barely grounding you to reality.
your grocery bags were long forgotten on the foor (as they usually are), your mind too foggy to function. clawing at the sheets, you try to crawl away from blade’s grip— to no avail.
he tuts, craning his head to bite down onto the skin where your shoulder meets your neck. “i might just need to mark you for extra precaution,” he bucks into you, knocking the air out of your lungs. you hear squelching, the constant plap! plap! plap! from his thighs smacking against your ass and whine, broken babbles leaving your kiss-bruised lips.
“b-blade, y’can’t- ah,” he shushes you by plugging you full of his lengthy cock, his knot almost threatening to press inside of you. you whimper, feeling lightheaded from a mix of both nervousness and arousal.
he soothes the hickey he left on your neck, licking it languidly as he stills to bask into the way your hole throbs around him. warm and tight and oh so tempting.
“shit, wanna fill you. wanna… have everyone know they can’t have you. you’re mine, mine to love ‘n mine to fuck,” you’re not lucid enough to process his thinly veiled confession, too busy writhing your ass back against him in a feeble attempt to get him to continue moving.
you might want to invest into some good concealer or into those skin coloured tattoo patches to cover the bruises and bite marks blade’ll leave on you if you want to continue being a functioning member of society. you can’t really be walking around in public as if a dog had just mauled you right before you left the house, can you?
gepard is a golden retriever because of COURSE he is. similarly to blade, he likes to invade your personal space a lot— not because he’s possessive, but because he’s extremely protective of you.
the random bruises you used to randomly notice on your body faded as soon as he came into your life. gepard’s soft, lingering touches healed them; gently placing a hand on your hip before you bump into sharp furniture so it doesn’t hit you, redirecting your head to his shoulder as you nod-off in the train before you bang your head, and so on.
it’s a full-time job and he’s working 24/7, always on the lookout for anything that could possibly hurt you as you saunter off… wherever, without a care in the world— because he took care of everything!
he would clean the apartment for you, cook (though you usually insist you do the cooking; a human doesn’t have the same taste in food as a hybrid), and even act as your own personal alarm clock. gone were the days of being woken up by loud, blaring beeping. gepard woke you up with forehead kisses instead, making your mornings much more pleasant.
but poor geppie, he’s always taking care of you; so take care of him, won’t you?
every so often you’ll sit in his lap to help him get rid of whatever stress he held in his body. your hands will knead at the muscles in his broad shoulders, all while you simultaneously kiss away the strain in his face. his brows are furrowed as you do your best to soothe his muscles; you never forget to smooch his cheek, nose and the corner of his lips.
though the attention and gentle acts of affection always ends with your hands lower than they should be.
“ah ah, no touching, remember?” you murmur in his ear playfully. you had been at it for what felt like hours; gepard’s cock and abdomen was smeared with the remnants of his cum, skin tacky from his previous loads. your hand shows no sign of stopping, not even when he begged oh so sweetly.
“c-come onn. just… jus’ wanna kiss…” and who were you to deny your sweet boy? your lips find his in a heartbeat, his tongue swiping over your own sloppily as he breathes you in like a depraved man.
the only condition you had when you did this was for him to keep his hands to himself— at least until you both decide to move on to something else. until then, his fists clench the sheets beneath the both of you, and his ears stay flat on his fluffy head.
“i’m… i’m close again, g- aah, please, please…!” he begs, cock weeping precum as you continuously jerk him off. you smile, absentmindedly rocking your hips to the rhythm you held him prisoner to— gepard was too engulfed in the warmth of your hand to notice, anyways. “cum whenever you want sweet boy,” you purr, and he keens as he buries his face in your neck, his hips lifting off the bed ever so slightly as they meet your hand and he thrusts, riding the high of his orgasm.
sticky cum coats your hand for the nth time; you relent your grip on his cock for his sake, instead choosing to shower him with chaste kisses all over his face. gepard whines, taking ahold of your waist weakly as he breathes into the crook of your neck.
“geppie, your han-“ he cuts you off, swiftly switching positions so you’re now laying on your back as he hovers over you, chest rising and falling quickly, catching his breath from the intensity of his orgasm. gepard’s tail wags slowly behind him as his hands creep up from your waist to your chest just as slowly- you feel his cock harden against your pelvis, precum spilling from his pinky tip.
“‘ts my turn now,” he huffs, leaning down to nip at your neck.
boothill is the most obnoxious dalmatian hybrid you’ve ever seen (not that you’ve seen many, or at all). but he’s made your life so fun so you can’t be too mad at him
he’s always dragging you out of bed to go do something— could be going to the park nearby or sit in the living room playing video games on your dusty console, it doesn’t matter because he’ll MAKE you step out of your cozy nest!!
you’re glad he’s friendly, because you’re not sure how you would handle such an excited hybrid when you left the house. people come up to the both of you to chat and he indulges their questions, essentially leading the conversation (while you stand there awkwardly, not knowing what to say).
boothill is also great with kids, unexpectedly. 9 times out of 10 when you go to the park he ends up playing with someone’s child, bright smile on his face as he messes up their hair with a rough hand. they’ll throw a frisbee for him to go catch and he’ll do it happily, or he’ll even… teach them how to beat people up.
(you stare mortified as he teaches a little girl how to throw a proper punch only for her to then punch her parent when she leaves boothill’s side. you go up to them and apologize profusely, forcing boothill to bow with you.)
he also loves to help you out, even though he’s not the greatest at household chores— but he definitely tries! though he is a stellar cook, which never fails to surprise you whenever he’s on dinner duty. he just… really sucks at everything else.
it’s… mostly because he just has so much energy. he sweeps the floor? nope, he’s picking off the pieces of the broom off of the floor because he accidentally broke it. he’s fixing your bed? nuh uh, you’re throwing out the ruined bedsheets because he accidentally tore them to shreds somehow.
so, with all of these accidents happening because he’s just brimming with energy 24/7, you started purposely exhausting him. or, rather, gave him the green light to exhaust you until he tires himself out.
“booth-aah, w-wait, you’re being too…!” you fall over on top of his hard chest, keening at the new angle his cock reached inside of you. he repeated his assault on the spot that made you see stars as your jaw gaped, broken moans leaving your lips.
“don’t tell me y’re tapping out.. haa, already!” boothill grunts, his grip on your hips tightening. he throws his head back with a loud moan, abs tensing as he nears yet another climax— the 5th one of the night. maybe, maybe not. you lost count after the third one.
you bury your face into the crook of his neck, focusing on the feeling of his cock plugging you full instead of the soreness, the burn in your muscles that came from your knees holding you up on his lap.
watching you riding him will always be his favourite thing in the world, even if he always ends up fucking up into you and taking back control at the end of the night.
“gonna cu-uum…” you whine, clenching around his length almost painfully tightly, hearing his breathing hitch as an orgasm is ripped out of him in consequence to yours. boothill’s fingers dig into your ass, his hips lifting off the bed as he cums deep inside of your sloppy hole again, sticky fluid building up beneath the sheets.
you collapse on top of him fully, chest heaving against his own as you come back to your senses, slowly but surely. boothill’s ears perk up, hearing how your breathing had evening out.
“so… got another round in ya?”
#not proofread i just rambled sorry teehee#i wish i could say i had the time to think about writing stuff at work but im so busy that i rly cant#gotta keep the customer service grind Up#gotta Lock In when i tell ppl to have a nice day ykwimsayin#anyways i was in a dogboy mood. Clearly#eat up yall#honkai star rail smut#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail x you#hsr x reader smut#hsr x reader#hsr x you#gepard x reader#blade x reader#boothill x reader#blade x reader smut#gepard x reader smut#boothill x reader smut#cw hybrids#tw hybrids
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laios has very quickly become dear to me not just because he's an autistic protagonist but because his autism is itself one of the reasons his party has an edge over others. though we see him struggle in social situations, his special interest makes him hypercompetent in the context of dungeon survival. i'm aware that's not a NEW observation on him but i was impressed that he even used his special interest to successfully solve a crisis that relied on noticing social cues- he was able to pick out the impostors bc he honed in on the small discrepancies in their attitudes toward monsters. if that isn't weaponizing your autism, i don't know what is
#omg this keeps getting notes... u shld look at my reblog w additional ramblings/meta in it too 👉👈#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi#laios touden#laios#actuallyautistic#autism things#aphelion.txt#ALSO WHAT WAS WITH THAT RANDOM 5SEC ANIMATION THAT WAS JUST HIM STIMMING#WHAT WAS THAT HUH#hes like ok im shifting into barking mode. gotta hype myself up with a quick flap sesh. i love him wtf#but yeah. being in the exact situation that your neurodivergency makes you extremely well equipped for is like#any autistic person's power fantasy#dunmeshi is just so much fun
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crusty evolution redraw. in theory.
#xmen#xmen evolution#erik lehnsherr#magneto#quicksilver#pietro maximoff#snap sketches#i stopped liking this past the lineart stage but i told myself id try to finish whatever i start to at least try and learn somethin#did i learn anything ? thats for me to reflect on. for now tho ramble time 😌#its painful to draw erik with short hair but sometimes you gotta get outta the usual !! <- never doing this again#ive been ahead of my schedule with stuff i have to draw so ive simply decided todaay will be My Day for personal doodles#idk why ive decided my first evo fanart should be the one where erik and pietro leave behind wanda but ok !!!!! freak#i have a long hair ver but i didnt color it. i was just greedy .. not greedy enough tho evidently#anyways i have like. idk what four episodes of evolution left ?? depressing this show's great ...#i didnt nkow theyd have a david ep ... a pleasant surprise but now im emo ...#OH WELL lets see what else i doodle tonight#this week's going to be annoying but i think i say that every week LMAO and look at that i get through them anyway#we'll be fine and chill team .. ok bye bye
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Istg if something comes out about Markiplier, Charlie, or Philza being bad people I’m rejecting humanity and becoming a fish that lives at the bottom of the ocean
#theyre the last good ones please 😭😭😭#charlie slimecicle#slimecicle#philza minecraft#philza mcyt#ph1lza#markiplier#wilbur soot#dream#I’m sick of people turning out to be fuckheads#i know technoblade got me but kesus fucking christ#why does the only good one gotta be dead man#tigers rambles aimlessly#mcyt#minecraft#minecraft youtube#tommyinnit#dsmp#dream smp
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wow i can't wait for the three wwdits endings: nandermo fuck and get married, nandermo become platonic vigilantes and are weird forever, or nandermo straight up murder each other
#that's gotta be it right#GOTTA be#wwdits#what we do in the shadows#wwdits tv#nandermo#nandor the relentless#nandor wwdits#wwdits nandor#guillermo wwdits#wwdits guillermo#personal ramblings#txt#enemies friends or lovers#take your pick
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