#goodnight everyone damn i feel so good right now what is happening

[paskariu]

today has been nice.

i managed to get a good chunk of junk out of my room AND i finally for the first time in my life managed a decent vegetable rice. i think this is the first time i’ve ever enthusiastically ate anything i’ve cooked because i swear on my orchids i am a not decent cook but things are starting to look up!

Liebe geht durch den Magen oder so.

[iihandsiiheavn]

ʚïɞ "such a savior" LH44

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀lewis hamilton x original female oc.

summary: in witch lilith is mid-breakdown with the worst man around but luckily, she has her fiancée and little sister.

warnings: a bitch of a dad, bad parenting, age gap (character is 24 although it isn't mentioned), mentions of psychological and physical abuse, description of needles and medical procedures without any proper knowledge. just pure sad angst and hurt but i am planning to write a part 2 out of this.

"Hey, Lewis. I didn't mean to bother you, and I know you're working, but... are you too busy now? Like... very, very, very busy?"

The Mercedes driver took a breath, standing in front of the gym mirror. He rested his spare hand on his waist and furrowed his eyebrows. A call from his fourteen-year-old sister-in-law was never expected and always a worry, but especially today, it was a sign to leave work.

"What happened, Sab? I'm heading home, don't worry. Is everything okay with Lili?"

He knew it wasn’t. He knew getting her dad to visit them in Monaco was a terrible idea, and he saw the hints his girlfriend gave. Her childhood was tough because of that man, and he knew it would be hard for Lilith, from the way she wanted to make sure the whole house was clean, to the way she wanted to take down all the glass decorations.

"Hum... Ye-yeah, I called the doctor you told me to, she's okay. Just come home, alright? She wants you here."

Damn, he hated that man. But Lili wanted to prove to her family that she was okay, that she and her soon-to-be husband had a good life, and Lewis respected that. Well, now he’s speeding home like there’s a Red Bull car right behind him.

"I'm on my way, Sab. Is she hurt? Did something happen? I really need to know, is your dad around?"

Lewis heard a deep breath as the phone rested on the passenger seat. He regretted giving in to this idea; this visit should have been a dinner thing with a quick goodnight. Tony, the father-in-law, was a monster with his words and even worse with his hands.

"They had a little fight, and I think something fell in the kitchen. You know she hates blood, so... yes. But she won’t let the doctor give her medicine, and Dad is mad, so... I’m kind of lost. I called you because of that."

"You did the right thing, bub. I’m nearby, okay? Do you mind staying on the phone with me?"

"No, not at all. That’s great, actually. Do you want me to... to talk to Dad?"

"No! No need to. I’m really close, I just want you to stay with me in case something happens and we need to be quick, don’t worry. I like talking to you."

Lili's sister and Lewis had a nice bond. Lewis, being great with kids and a sympathetic softie with everyone, quickly won her over. He knew things weren’t easy for her either. Maybe too young to understand, the couple had only been able to offer a little support to the young girl since her sister left home two years ago.

With a few more words and minutes, the driver arrived home, climbing up the stairs and feeling the thick, heavy air as soon as he stepped inside, almost as if he could touch the tension.

"No! No, I don’t need that! I don’t, I promise I don’t! Tell Lewis to come over! He knows I don’t need any of that!"

Her sobs cut through her words and then right through the man's chest, a striking pain as he approached the living room and hung up the phone, pocketing the device as he entered.

Lili had her face covered in tears, a desperate look in her eyes as her father held both of her arms down on the bed. In the last few seconds before Lewis could touch the man’s shoulder and pull him away with little to no effort, the man stumbled backward, surprised by the sudden intervention but not resisting.

"Lew! Hey, Lew. Hey. You’re home." she let out a high sigh, touching her fiancé’s face as if she just wanted to make sure he was real, that there was a hint of peace. "Hey, hey. Can you... can you tell the doctor I’m okay? I don’t... I don’t need any medicine, I’m just fine."

She kept insisting on that. She could run a mile screaming she was fine because it was almost automatic, what she had said throughout her whole life. Never wanting to be a bother, never meaning harm, Lili could take a beating and hide all the hurt from the one who caused it. She’s just like that.

Now there’s blood trickling from the side of her forehead, near her scalp and down her ear. God, how he wants to ask what happened.

"Baby, you’re bleeding," he said softly, very careful with his tone. "Can you take a breath for me? A big, deep one. Just breathe, okay? I know you’re fine."

Lewis had learned how to calm his girl down over the years. She just needed to feel safe and in control, two things she never had in life. And that made him really mad about the other man in the room, but he was mature enough to slow down and focus on Lili. She needed to calm down and let the medication take effect.

"Baby, I don’t... don’t need anything, I promise you I don’t. Tell her to go away."

And injectables were another part of the problem. Her dad was an addict, she saw some ugly stuff, and now she was too terrified to go near a needle. Lewis knew that.

"It’s just some painkillers, Lili. I promise. You have to take them to feel better, and in the meantime, we’ll treat your injury, okay? We’ll fix everything." He softly touched the bleeding skin, suddenly angry at how he could see she wanted to avoid his approach but would never show it. "Okay? You can hold onto me if you want to."

"No. No. I don’t want to. I really don’t. I don’t want to, I promise I don’t need anything! I can handle myself, and if I can’t... you’ll do it! You won’t hurt too much. Do it. If you have to, do it. But don’t let them put anything in me."

Then things got out of control. Lili didn’t notice the doctor had managed to put the heart monitor on her finger, and she only realized it when the beeps became too fast. Something sticky on her back, a harsh pain in her chest, and her body unable to stay still.

"She’s panicking, Sir Hamilton. I’ll proceed with the medication, okay? She’s collapsing."

"No! Lew! No, NO! You know what you have to do! I can calm down! I can, I don’t need to do any of this! I just need to... I just need to be put in place! I promise I won’t even cry."

Lili clung to his shirt like her life depended on it, and Lewis wondered how the man behind them might be feeling. That’s it, his daughter was on the verge of collapsing and asking to be hit —that’s how she learned life should be, and it was no surprise to Lewis.

Not the first time she expected him to snap.

"I recommend you hold her, sir. It won’t be easy, but it won’t hurt, and she’ll calm down right away. It’s for the best."

"NO! Lewis. Lew, please! Please. Just do it, I’ll get better. Don’t let them—"

"Hey, Lili. Baby, look at me." He tried to calm down, cupping her face in his hands and glancing quickly at the doctor, asking her to wait. "I will never hurt you, ever. I won’t raise a hand against you. I promise. I won’t ever do it, no matter what. I am so sorry for this."

She thought it was an apology for what he just said, but it took a few seconds until she was trapped in his arms, struggling to break free, breath stuck, and air leaving without any intention of returning. A few more fighting seconds until a sharp pain in her arm. Confusion, then nothing.

"It’s for the best, baby. Okay? You’ll get better." His voice was almost a whisper, cracking and low. "Shhhh.. I’ll be right here, okay? I’ll be here."

Her body gave up fighting right away. Lewis only had to adjust her head a little, positioning her better, fixing her hair and her shirt immediately.

"Fuck," he murmured, closing his eyes as he leaned back, forcing the tears to stay in his eyes.

"I know it’s hard," the doctor said. "But you did the right thing. Her heart was too fast, and she’s still losing blood. Can you lay her down, please? I’ll take care of her."

"Please, be careful. Please," he kept his voice low, holding his girl with all the care in the world as he laid her back, head on the pillow and her hair out of the way.

That’s a big bruise; it’s turning darker than her skin.

"It’s okay. She’s okay; it’s just a bruise. She’s just off mentally."

Lewis stood up, kissed his girl on the head, and fixed his shirt by the shoulders, eyes searching for Sab, who he hadn’t spoken to since he hung up the call.

"Hey, bug. Thank you for calling, okay? Lili is fine now, thanks to you." He ruffled the little girl’s hair, who was nervously waiting by the door.

"It’s okay."

"Yeah. You’re staying the night, alright? Go to your room and order something for us to eat. Vegan, don’t forget."

Sabrina smiles softly and agrees, turning around to head down the hallway. Yeah, now things are getting serious.

"You got Lilith, and now you're going after Sabrina? Very fun, Sir Lewis Hamilton."

"No reason to laugh." the Sir Lewis Hamilton approached his father-in-law. "That's enough of you. It's completely enough. Get your fucking things and leave my house. Leave our lives, leave your children alone. They don't need you."

"Shut the fuck up, little man. What the fuck do you know about what my children need?"

"I know how to call the cops. I know how you made your way into Lili's mind and made her think she deserves to be hurt. What is that on her head, huh? Or do you think I'm just as clueless as Sab? Leave, now."

"This is not over," the old man grins. "I'll be back to get Sabrina and check on Lili."

[brabblesblog]

Safety

Part 6 of the Goodnight Moon series

The confession has its repercussions.

More angst (happy ending at the end of the series) and more slow, slow burn.

Read on AO3.

Part 5

Part 7

Masterlist.

Astarion hears the words, but it doesn't really register. What? He blinks, taking a moment for it to sink in. He had heard those same words before, countless times from countless lips - lips soon to be screaming and crying as Cazador took them away. He instinctively flinches away from your grasp, taking a sharp breath. This isn't the same situation, he tries to remind himself, but is it not?

Did he not manipulate his way into your bed? Into your heart? Did he not do this to send you Cazador's way? To kill him this time, sure, but what difference did that make?

And shouldn't he be happy? Your devotion to him was clearly written on your face. You died for him. Surely you would go to the ends of the earth to rid him of Cazador. But all he feels is a mix of relief and a twisted pain in his chest where his heart was. Relief that you had finally come back to him, yes, but that pain - he refused to look too deeply into it.

He looks to your soft, sad eyes and slipped his mask back on. It takes seconds to do, seconds you would have normally seen but not right now in your current condition.

"That's even worse, darling," he hisses, trying to bring as much venom into his words. "Love is for the foolish, the unlucky, the damned. I-," he almost falters, but presses on, "I don't do love. Let's just keep this fun, alright?"

You look away. Of course. That explained those faraway eyes whenever you were together. You try not to cry, but it was hard. Not expecting anything in return was one thing, but having your feelings dismissed so nonchalantly was another. You nod curtly and lay back down, stretching your neck out. If this was the case, you can only really think of one reason he'd be here.

"I understand," you say, in a small whisper, eyes brimming with tears. He can see it, can almost taste your pain, but he cannot - will not - do anything about it. "Just feed, please, and then you can go. I need to rest."

He stares at you in confusion. "Why would I - you're -"

He stops himself, realizing why. Instead he shakes his head. "You don't really have much blood left inside you, so I shall abstain today. I just came by on the way to hunt to make sure my little snack was going to be alright. And it seems like you are." He pats your hand twice, awkwardly. "I shall go, then. Good night," he says a little too cheerily, turning to leave.

If he hears the soft muffled sounds of your sobbing as he does, he ignores it.

As the days pass you slowly recover, thanks to Shadowheart and Halsin's help. You have been staying with the druid more often of late, as he helped you walk and would carry you when your body finally gave up walking. Astarion seemed to be acting like nothing had happened between you that night. He was back to his usual flirty, sassy self, and you were all too happy to just let that happen. There were too many problems for you and everyone at camp, and you were all too happy to just push this one to the side for now.

You still asked him to come feed on you at night, and without fail he would show up. Your little conversations in your tent remained the same. The only thing that changed was that whenever he would reach out - to touch your hand, or to cup your cheek - you would flinch slightly, but let him do it anyway. It meant nothing to him, you knew, but you couldn't really resist these small morsels of affection he gave no matter how insincere it was.

As the group traveled the underdark and the shadow cursed lands, Astarion begins spending more time at your tent after he had fed. There was nothing to hunt here, the lands barren and desolate. Inevitably it brought you two closer, but you knew not to let hope into your heart.

"Tomorrow we have to look for last night inn," you say, yawning. He had fed a lot today, as the fights had taken a lot of his energy. He nods and takes your hand, lazily tracing your knuckles. "Mm. I shall scout ahead. Which direction was it again?"

You frown. "Why do you like being in front? You don't trust me to have your back anymore? We used to fight back to back and- ugh. Never mind." You worry you pushed too far, asked too many things and upset the delicate situation you two had.

He tilts his head to meet your eyes. His were oddly round and shiny, as though he was about to cry.

"To keep you safe," he says in such a small voice that it's almost inaudible. You notice that his hand gripped yours tightly now, terrified of letting go.

"I can keep myself safe, Astarion. If anything, I keep you safe," you say, joking a little bit. He does not find it the least amusing. His eyes narrow and he almost hisses. "No," he says, his voice low and rough. "You are incapable of that, darling. You did it once, and it killed you. No more."

You take a deep breath, trying not to react in a way that would push him away. "Thank you for your concern. I am well though. I have been training with Halsin as well. I have seen my errors and am improving in combat. You can ask him."

His grip in your hand is almost painful now. He wants to scream, to tell you how much fear he felt when you died, how he could never live through that again. He bites his lip hard, enough to draw blood.

"Be as it may, me leading in the front has been beneficial to the group," he says quickly. It was true, to a point. He knew though that he had to leave. Any more of this conversation, and he was afraid he'd open his mouth and his heart would come spilling out onto your hands.

"Thank you, yet again, for the blood," he says as he slaps on a well-practiced smirk. "I shall see your delicious self tomorrow."

You nod, closing your eyes and settling in for the night.

He gives you once last glance, and is unable to completely stop himself. He leans over you and you feel soft lips press against yours. You feel a soft gust of wind as the tent flap is opened and when you open your eyes, he is gone.

[jaycewrites-192000]

Spot The Difference

Summary: Smiley changes his hair color. No one seems to notice, except for you that is.

Pairing(s): Platonic!Nahoya Kawata x Platonic!Reader x Platonic!Souya Kawata

Warning(s): None

Credit to: @nahfthis for the idea!

Unbelievable. Absolutely unbelievable. You’d think after all this time being apart of Toman. They’d notice a change within one of their own members. But no. It seems this change has gone right over their thick heads. For god’s sake, you didn’t need to be a detective to notice! “You know. If you don’t tell me what’s got you so upset, I won’t know how to help you feel better.” Smiley’s younger twin says to him. The two were heading home from a Toman meeting, the whole time Smiley said little to nothing to his brother.

“Tsk. I shouldn’t have to say anything. It’s obvious.” Smiley spat. Angry sighs. “If it were obvious I would have said something.” The two approached their home, they walked inside, greeted by their little sister who was chilling out on the couch. She could make it to tonight’s meeting, as she was only just now recovering from an intense cold. “Welcome back.” Y/n says to the two with a smile. Her smile fell slightly as she noticed her oldest brother. “Oh.” I mutters.

“He’s upset.” Angry tells her. “And he won’t tell me why.” Y/n stands up from the couch and approaches the two. “Really? Did something happen Nahoya?” She asks. “Damn right something happened.” Smiley grumbled. “Sis, please tell me you noticed at least.”

“Noticed? Noticed what?” Angry raises an eyebrow. Y/n stares at Smiley for a second before nodding. “Yep. It’s as clear as day.” Angry gave her a look. “What?” He asks. Y/n looks to him next. “You don’t see it?”

“Thank you!” Smiley exclaims.

“What!? What don’t I see!?” Angry asks. Y/n gestures to Smiley’s head. “His hair.” She answers simply. “What about his hair!?” Angry asked frantically. “What’s different!?”

Y/n and Smiley looked at each other. “Really?” Y/n mutters. “Not only him. Everyone in Toman didn’t notice either.” Smiley tells her. “Guys!” Angry yells. “He dyed his hair a different color.” Y/n finally tells him. Angry stares at the two blankly. “….what?”

“Yeah. Nahoya dyed his hair. It’s darker. Can’t you tell?”

“No! No one would be able to tell that!”

“You’d think growing up together, you’d notice little things like that.” Smiley says, crossing his arms. Y/n nodded in agreement. Angry sighed heavily before walking past the two. “I’m going to bed.” Y/n giggled before wishing him a goodnight. She then turned to Smiley. “That was kind of mean. You did only dye it slightly different.”

Smiley only shrugs. “I’m surprised that you’re the only one who saw it. Literally no said anything about it.”

“Eh. I got good eyes I guess.” Y/n smirks. “Anyway, we should apologize to Souya.”

“Fine. But I’m still mad no one could tell.” Smiley mutters. Y/n pats his shoulder. “You’ll be ok.” She says before walking away. “Good night Nahoya.”

“Night.” Smiley says, his tense smile now softer and more sincere. He sure was lucky he had such an attentive little sister. Otherwise he’d feel pretty unseen.

Or maybe he was just being dramatic, as always…

Kawata Sibling Series is back! Yay!

I love writing these goofballs so much🩵

[moonlesslights]

Like you saw him.

Summary: Being the owner of a little bakery brings you closer to Mr. Scrooge. Seeing him every day is an habit by now, so it is obviously concerning when it is almost closing time and he hasn’t shown yet.

A/N: This man is big, and his big shoulders can crush me any day. Still, I let you here with some fluff and just a little bit of sexual innuendos. Enjoy and lots of love!

…

You saw him everyday.

Most of the time, by morning; when he walked through the bakery doors to ask for the new recipe you manage to create every week. Some other occasions, when work was tough, he would came by when the sun was already setting, asking (rather demanding) for the weekly and most expensive bread you had.

Today is one of those days.

There are only five minutes left of working hours before you close the shop like every other night. You know your parents will grow worried if you are late to home again, and by that you know that there had been only two occasions where you didn’t arrive home at time. Last christmas night, when a complete family showed up out of nowhere to buy tons of bread but keeping you for almost another half an hour; and the time when you sprained your ankle on your way back and weren’t able to walk much more from there.

Neither of both scenarios assure you your father wouldn’t leave home immediately to look for you if you spend a minute more sitting here. But you just can’t go with your last and traditional delivery still missing.

Your eyes dart at the clock in the back of the store, sighing. Just two minutes to nine. Just two minutes and you would be forced to leave.

Trying to distract yourself for the intimidating clock hands moving on an unstoppable pace, you continue your writing on your little notebook, adding quick annotations, encircling keywords and underlining some others to remember your future self to read that right and not miss any step (again). Your next work is almost done, at least in what theory respects.

Nine o’clock.

It was over.

You purse your lips, felling uneasy as you reach for your coat and scarf, slowly scanning the freezing and lonely streets that awaited for you. You frown. What if something happened?, what if he didn’t like this weekly bread as much as the past ones?, oh my, was it your fault?

No. Wait. And why should you care?, it is his goddamn business if he doesn’t think your cooking is good enough. He can look for another bakery if he wishes so, let’s see if they save a damn peace alone just for…

Ding.

Your neck almost cracks when the doorbell rings and you turn to see the entering figure with a bad, if at all, dissimulated surprise covering your features.

And there he was. Covered in snowflakes and leaving a snowy mess all over the shop floor. His dark coat seemed to be little for the sharp cold city tonight, but you couldn’t catch a single hint of shivers running through him, not even when his gloveless hands wiped off some more white dust of his clothes. Rather than that, he appears to have been in a hurry with his reddened cheeks and unfazed breathing.

And you knew you shouldn’t have, but you smiled, sincere, almost relieved to see him there.

He had always had that effect on you. You never knew why, why did the most hated man of this city caused you to do nothing but relax in his presence, why did everyone despised him, why didn’t you. Safety is the usual word that come across your mind. You feel safe with him. He may be grumpy, serious and alarmingly rude, but you don’t think he could ever hurt you (as long as you're not indebted to him).

“Good evening, Mr. Scrooge.” Your greeting goes unanswered as he moves towards you, still trying to catch his breath. “Do you feel unwell?”

“Nothing that concerns you.” He does answer to that.

You nod, watching how his eyes travel along all the remaining bread of the afternoon and, as always, waiting for his usual request.

However, one thing goes unplanned.

“I believe I arrived a little too late. Goodnight.”

As unpredictable his appearance was, his return to the exit doors was even more. His back was facing you before you could even register what had happened and his steps were hurried towards the cold streets again.

You frown, turning your gaze to him and to what he was watching a second ago with your mouth wide open. Two times until it hits you: the little wooden shelf where you kept the weekly creation was totally empty.

“Wait!” His hand on the handle, his body stiffens at your sudden call. He only gives you a sided look, refusing to let you see more of him. “You are here for the new bread, aren’t you?”

Another unanswered question.

You huff, shaking your head.

“Y’know, everything would be resolved if you just told me what you want…” You state while looking down and taking a paper box with one of your hands. Sighing, you place it on top of the counter. “Voilà.”

Slowly, he returns his face to you. Suspicious, he wrinkles his nose, asking you with a single lifted eyebrow what was that.

“Bread. The bread. The last one. Only for you.” You say almost in defeat. “Now, could you please take it?, it is already really late.”

You look up at him and he receives you with an unusual expression on his face. So much that it takes you by surprise.

His eyes are wide open and his mouth remains unclosed. Now both of his brows are slightly lifted as you can hear him almost gulp. You have never seen his pupils light up like this, almost like a tiny star trapped in there. His lips parted, you can see as one on the corners of his mouth fight to remain pointing down.

Screw you, Mr. Scrooge, you find yourself thinking as you watch closely his salt and pepper hair covered still in small snowflakes, his crooked nose and big shoulders underneath his clothes, making me lose my time, getting on my nerves… I don’t know why I still-

“I want you to come to have dinner in my house.”

Now, what?

“What was that?” You ask, suddenly snapping out of your trance.

He looks at you for a solid second before stating again:

“I want you to come to have dinner in my house.” This time he repeats every word with a considerable separation between each of them.

You tilt your head, remaining quiet for quite an unreasonable amount of time just trying to figure out the words coming to your ears. He has left you astonished and you can hear a little you mocking your saying of always having something smart to say.

Well, look at you now…

“Eh, mhm… Why?” You find out that was the only thing able to be formed by your mouth.

Little did you know, your companion was, if not more, falling into nervousness at the same time as you did.

What the hell had gotten to his mouth?

What was he even thinking?

“Because I want to.”

Your mouth falls open. Blinking slowly in his direction, you find yourself fighting to process the very conversation you were having right now. 

“Because you want to?” 

Ebenezer clears his throat, putting on his most confident face. 

“You told me to tell what I want.” He pauses, raising an eyebrow. “Well, I want that. I want you to join me to dinner.”

You blink again, and suddenly, his words snap in your head. Yes, you did tell him that, but you could have never believed he would have take it this literal. In less than a second, a smile takes over your lips, bringing a bursting laugh to your throat. 

“Are you serious?!” You ask, even more excited that you would’ve had like. 

Ebenezer nods, big open eyes with confussion looking at your reaction. You laugh again, giving him a big toothy smile and... He could have died right there. 

You just gave him that smile. The smile you gave when you were really happy, the smile he only had seen a few times, never to him, never in his direction. And maybe someone else would have scolded you for your lack of decency in that thunderous laugh, but him... He was fascinated. If you just stopped in the middle of it you would’ve had caught his bright pupils and the smile threatening to cling onto his own lips. 

“I would love to, Mr. Scrooge.” You finally take him out of his trance, welcoming him with another warm smile. 

“Ebenezer.” He rushes to say. 

Your eyes soften even more, nodding. 

“I would love to have dinner with you, Ebenezer.” You conceed. “When?”

“Christmas.” He bursts out, taking you aback. Well, that would be a hell of a long talk with your parents to be absent on that day, but still...

“Sure. That sounds amazing.” 

He smiled. 

A year has passed and looking back on that day, you can’t believe how much things have changed. 

Now, after a beatiful wedding only two months ago and another dog, you finally moved in to his house. Both have made a lot of remodelations and bought a lot more of decorations. In his words: The house came to life when you first set a foot on it. In yours: He was just a little careless. 

Now he is the first one to taste your weekly creation after, as always, trying to “help you” cooking. He and the two dogs usually are just there to make a mess and, every time, you end up with several hand marks in flour covering your hips, waist, belly and sometimes other places. 

Now he takes as an excuse how messy you both are after cooking to take you to the bath with him. He always insists to undress you, taking his time to caress your body, softly, before insisting again in washing your hair when you get into the bathtub. Then, sometimes, he gets cooky as he unbuttons his shirt, smiling when he catches your gaze on his exposed skin; some other times he just uses this excuse to bury himself in you, slowly, spilling water all over the floor everytime he pushes. 

Now he waits for you to fall asleep every night before he does. Taking you in his arms, your breath lulling him to sleep. Easing his hearth. And every day, his eyes, full of love, wish you good morning as he playfully pecks your lips. He makes breakfast, meals are usually out, when he takes a break from work and takes you to different restaurants all around the city; dinner is on you. He sets the table and you spoil him with a homemade food made with the groceries he always insist on shopping with you. 

Now, he might still be the most hated man in the city. But your love for him remains as untouched as the one that started growing in you since the very first day you saw him. 

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

There's Beauty in Tragedy: Part Five

Pairing: Jennifer Jareau x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.3k

Warnings: angst, stalking, being attacked, break in

Summary: Someone is stalking you. That much is evident, but you never thought they'd take it as far as to break into your home and make you understand that you're not the one in control here.

There's Beauty in Tragedy Masterlist

Square Filled: this is not. adrill for @badthingshappenbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

x

He’s parked outside Y/N’s expensive house but he’s managed to hack into her security cameras as easily as he does laundry. She’s inside her bedroom getting undressed for the night. Damn, she looks better than she did when he last saw her years ago. She pulls on the country-fair t-shirt her ex-girlfriend got for her in college. He remembers that night. Everyone in school went to that thing.

She climbs into bed and keeps her bedside lamp on for a source of light. There are so many things in her room that it makes him sick. She is so materialistic. She makes all this money and doesn’t do anything meaningful with it. She fills her house with trinkets and expensive things to make it look like she’s this glamorous person. She’s not. She’s putting up a facade.

He could go inside her house right now and take it all from her in an instant… if he wanted to, that is.

After a long and hard day at work, you’re ready to wind down and sleep easy knowing you’re about to see your girlfriend in two days. You grab your phone and FaceTime her so you can see her gorgeous face before bed. She answers from inside her hotel room with room service on the table. She’s on a case a few hours from where you are by plane.

“Hi, gorgeous,” you grin.

“Hey, I thought you’d be sleeping by now.”

“I couldn't go to bed without saying goodnight to you. I miss you.”

“I come home in two days,” she chuckles.

“I can’t wait that long. Maybe I’ll head to the airport and fly to you. Maybe I’ll surprise you in bed.”

“You’d cost me my job because we wouldn't leave it.”

“Tempting,” you smirk. “How was your day?”

“Long. It took us longer to build a profile of the unsub which resulting him killing two more women. We finally got it ready and gave it out. I’m hoping we have him tomorrow or else I’ll have to stay out here a little bit longer.”

“I just want you to stay safe even if that means you being away from me for a bit longer. You’ll get the bad guy. You always do.”

“My team does. I’m just the liaison.”

“That team would be nothing without you. You’re a vital part. Don’t forget that,” you wink.

“How was your day?”

“Productive. I had a meeting with a new client, someone I’ve never worked with before. No, I can’t tell you who it is but just know she’s A-list.”

“Wow, good for you.” JJ sees the slightly upset look on your face. “What’s wrong? Did something else happen today?”

“I got a call from Mark again. I didn’t think he’d be so bold to call. He called my assistant to set up a meeting with me, but I overheard her say his name. I told her never to make an appointment with him and to decline all of his calls.”

“Are you sure you don’t want my team’s help?”

“I can handle it but I love how much you worry.”

“I will always worry when it comes to you.”

“Alright, angel, I have to go. I’m tired, but I will talk to you tomorrow morning and I’ll see you in two days.”

“Okay, goodnight,” she smiles.

Both of you kiss the screens before hanging up. You sleep good knowing she is safe where she is and you’re safe where you are.

The next morning, instead of going to the office and working on your designs, you have to stop by one of your stores to check on how they’re doing. It’s so weird. The second you stepped foot out of the door, you felt like someone was watching you. Even now while you’re walking down the street to your store, you feel eyes on you.

You stop outside of it and look at the busy street behind you. People hustle to get to their jobs, cars drive by with passengers, and none of them are looking at you or watching you. Why are you feeling this way? You push down this feeling and walk into your store with a smile.

“Y/N! Welcome back!” the store manager greets.

“Betty, it’s so nice to see you again. How are things here?”

“Just fine. We’re doing pretty well this week, though, product is running a bit low.”

“Yeah, I have more in stock which I’ll bring tomorrow.”

“Oh, I almost forgot, someone came in asking for you.”

“Who?”

“She didn’t leave a name but she did leave this.”

Betty takes you to the back where a bouquet of flowers is. It’s your favorite kinds of flowers all rolled into one bouquet. Attached to the vase is a card, and you rip it off to read what it says.

Nice to see you still have that country-fair t-shirt I got you. You looked so good in it last night.

Fear creeps up your neck because how the hell did this person know what you were wearing last night? You did wear an old t-shirt your ex-girlfriend got you, but you’re confused because you haven’t talked to her since you graduated college.

“Are you sure she didn’t leave a name?”

“Yeah. She came in twenty minutes ago. She might still be outside.”

You immediately leave the store in search of the woman you once knew. People pass you by on their way to malls or their jobs but none of them are Courtney. The feeling of someone watching you has increased so you head back inside to escape it.

“Thank you for accepting the flowers. I’ll take them.” Betty hands them over and talks about the revenue for this week which has been in the high positives for quite some time now. “Keep up the good work. We’ll talk about raises next week because I’m impressed with your work. I’ll bring more product tomorrow.”

“Thank you, Y/N. We’ll see you tomorrow,” she grins.

You leave the store with the flowers only to toss them into the dumpster next to the store. You keep the card for evidence. You’re not sure what this is but you don’t think it’s smart to throw it away. On your way back to your office, you call the police to make a report that someone was watching you last night and left you flowers with a creepy note attached to them. You’re not sure what they can do with that information but at least a report was documented.

The second you get off the phone with the police, you call JJ.

“Hey, can I call you back in a bit?”

“I think I’m being stalked,” you blurt.

“Excuse me,” she says to someone in the room with her. She steps out to give herself some privacy. “Did you say you’re being stalked?”

“I’m sorry for bothering you. I know you’re busy--”

“No, what’s going on?”

“I went to one of my stores to check on things when the manager said someone dropped off flowers for me. I got a note with the flowers that suggested someone was watching me last night. Whoever this is mentioned a shirt I was wearing last night but I was alone.”

“Did you find out who left you the flowers?”

“No, but it’s implied my ex-girlfriend did it because I was wearing the shirt she gave me in college. I can’t think of why she’d leave me notes or how she knew what I was wearing last night. I haven’t seen or talked to her since I graduated college. I called the police to make a report about it but I wanted you to know.”

“We caught the unsub today. We’re heading home as soon as possible. We should get there really late at night or tomorrow morning depending on when the rest of the team wants to leave. I’ll help you out when I do get home.”

“No, it’s fine. I don’t think it’s anything serious that the FBI needs to get involved with.”

“I’m helping you, Y/N. I have the means to. Just let me look into it, at least.”

“Fine. I gotta go. Sorry I took you away from your job. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Maybe this was a prank. Maybe someone wants to scare you. How did this person know what you were wearing? Your security lights didn’t go off last night so there was no one close enough to your house to see what you were wearing. Did they hack into your cameras? If they did, they’d have to be really smart because you have a very sophisticated system.

Your paranoia doesn’t go away even when you’re getting ready for bed. You still feel like someone is watching you but you can’t see anyone inside or outside your house. Maybe this is just a bad feeling and it’ll go away tomorrow.

You’re maybe three hours into the night when you’re woken up by your house alarm going off. You shoot up in bed and look around the dark room, afraid that if you turn on the light, whoever caused the alarm to go off will know you’re awake. 

Plus, you know your own house better than anyone. You can navigate through the darkness.

You grab your phone and keep the backlight on dim as you go to your camera app. Every single camera you own has been disabled so you’re looking at a completely black screen. You have no eyes anywhere. You have no idea who is inside your house. The alarm shuts off presumably by the person who set it off.

The fear you felt from your first robbery is slowly coming back but you have to keep a level head. Panic is what kills people. You get out of bed just as you hear someone rummaging through your house. It sounds like they are getting closer so you dash to your closet and hide behind some clothes.

Your alarm is connected to the police so they should have gotten an alarm but you still dial 911 just to be safe.

“911, what’s your emergency?”

JJ is thankful that the team wanted to come home earlier so she can be with you sooner. She is eager to get to your place and get to the bottom of who is making your life hell. Her phone rings as soon as she gets into her car, and she answers it when she sees it’s her friend from the VAPD.

“Josie, what’s going on?”

“You told me to call you if anything happened at Y/N’s house.”

JJ doesn’t have to hear the whole story to convince her team to head immediately to your house. The entire street is blocked off by police and fire and ambulance are already at your house. She doesn’t want to seem desperate by running into your house like a maniac but she does speed walk to get there. You’re sitting on the couch with a cut on your head that a paramedic is looking at.

“Y/N!”

“JJ,” you whimper.

She joins your side on the couch while the rest of the team questions the police and tries to figure out what happened here.

“Oh, my God. Are you okay? What happened?”

“I don’t know. I woke up to someone breaking into my house. I was sleeping and I checked the cameras but they were all disabled. I ran into my closet and called 911 but he heard me and came after me. Either I hit my head or he slammed me into something but he definitely tried attacking me. Police were here in under five minutes. He heard the sirens and bolted. I didn’t see his face.”

You’re almost in tears from how scared you are and your whole body is shaking from fear. JJ pulls you closer and smooths down your hair and rubs your back.

“Come here. I’m right here now. You’re okay.”

“I don’t know how he disabled my cameras or if he stole anything but I’m terrified.”

“I know. You’re staying with me tonight, okay?”

“Okay,” you whisper.

You hate feeling like a little child because that’s what fear feels like to you. It makes you cower in and reverts your mind back to what it was like as a child. You hate feeling physically vulnerable.

“I’ll be right back. I’ll be right over there.” JJ leaves the paramedic to finish his job while she joins the officers whom Hotch and Derek are talking to. “Do you have any suspects?”

“None that fits the description she gave us. However, she did file a report about flowers and a note being left at one of her stores earlier today. I guess someone was watching her sleep the night before. An ex-girlfriend she seems to think. I’ll have someone get in contact with her and have her come down for questioning.”

“Okay. Is she okay to leave here?”

“Yeah, as soon as the paramedics are done checking her out. This place will remain a crime scene for a few days. There’s blood inside her closet presumably from her but we want to make sure.”

“Of course,” JJ nods. When the paramedic says you don’t need to go to the hospital, JJ helps you pack a bag. “You’re going to be okay. My team is on this and there is no one better to help.”

“I know. I just hate that it had to come to this.”

“Come on, let’s go home and rest.”

Fuck. She just had to fight back. He almost had her but the bitch put up a good fight on him. The second he heard those sirens it was either her or him, so he ran. He’ll get her another time but he has to wait until the smoke clears with the police.

He sits in his car a few blocks over with his eyes closed and mouth parted. As terrible as it was that he didn't get her, he got a rush of adrenaline just from being there. Damn, he missed that. He hasn’t felt this way in a really, really long time.

Now that he got a taste of it again, he’s just getting started.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[kirayaykimura]

Inns and Outs

The thing about staying in inns with Obi, Shirayuki has noticed, is that almost everyone assumes they are together. As in, they would obviously like to share a bed. Which, honestly, Shirayuki wouldn’t be opposed to, but Obi seemed very set against it the one time she offered. 

“We’ve slept in the same bed before,” she’d reminded him when she sat down on their single bed and he made a comfortable nest out of pillows and blankets on the floor. 

“That was different,” he’d said. “Everyone else was there, too. Also, I did not sleep that night.”

So she didn’t push the issue when an innkeeper assumed they would only be needing one bed and Obi rattled off a bizarre story about having pugilistic sleeping habits, or when he declared that they were actually bitter exes forced to travel together one last time so Shirayuki could claim her rightful inheritance due to a small clause in her grandfather’s will. She also does not push the issue when Obi wistfully tells their current innkeeper, “I’m just the bodyguard. Wouldn’t be very appropriate to share a bed,” though she wants to because he isn’t just her bodyguard. He hadn’t been in a very long time, and it worries her to imagine he still thinks of himself so. 

The woman behind the desk raises an eyebrow. “Just a bodyguard, are you?” 

He laughs, delighted by her skepticism. “Now, ma’am, whatever could you mean by that?” 

“If I had a bodyguard who looked like you, and looked at me the way you look at her,” she says, turning her attention to Shirayuki, “I wouldn’t make him get a second bed is all I’m saying.” 

Obi heaves a mournful sigh and says, “Ah, damned by my own eyes. You caught me! I’m hopelessly pining. Take pity on me and don’t make me share a bed with the love of my life who does not love me back. It would be cruel.” He gave her a slight pout to really drive the point home. 

Like consciousness on the edge of a dream, Shirayuki brushes up against something that she could understand if only she could reach out just a little further, hold onto that thought a little longer. It slips away again when the innkeeper says, “Alright, then. Two beds it is. You’re wasting him, though.” 

Obi laughs. Shirayuki blinks. 

Once in their room, they settled into their separate beds. Obi on his back staring up at the ceiling, Shirayuki feeling a little like she’s trying to get away with something when she curls on her side to look at him. In the soft moonlight barely able to break through the clouds and their window, she can just make out Obi’s profile, the curve of his chest, the lean line of his stomach, legs that disappear under covers. When she looks back up again, she finds him staring back at her. 

“Can’t sleep?” he asks. 

She doesn’t know how to respond. There are so many thoughts, most of them confusing, floating around in her brain at the moment. She’s afraid that if she opens her mouth to speak, something nonsensical will come out like, “I want to see your knees.” In the end, she shakes her head, burrowing slightly further into her pillow. 

“Hey,” he says. “Everything alright?” 

Of course he would notice. To not worry him, she finds her voice long enough to say, “Yes.” 

He turns his head slightly to look over at her, clearly unconvinced, and says, “If this is about what happened earlier, it was all a joke, okay? You know that. I love messing with innkeepers.” 

“I know,” she says. She did know. What she had no clue about was why it made her feel so off. With a good night’s rest, though, she should be right as rain. Resolving to put the conversation to bed with herself, she turns on her other side and says, “Goodnight.” 

“Goodnight, miss,” comes his soft reply. 

That night, she dreams of hands reaching out but never touching. And fish for some reason, but that probably has nothing to do with anything. 

[rhythm-tengoku-gold]

Well, considering this post got some likes that means a few folks are interested…

So, first of all, I am a proud epileptic. If I see good rep of folks that have seizures*,there’s a damn good chance that I’m going to really fixate on that character. But I digress. So what is this theory? Well…

Was Tiffany Wright from Hypnospace Outlaw in some way inspired by/a nod to Tim Wright from Marble Hornets?

Honestly, I think I may just be looking too deep into things, but I do have some evidence. Although, they could just be coincidences.

Let’s go over the similarities of the two I’ve noticed, shall we?

• Obviously, there’s the whole name deal. They’re really damn similar. I don’t got much to say here.

• Both of them are epileptic/experience tonic clonic/grand mal (I gotta wonder why the term was changed) seizures, & these play a significant part into their respective narratives. Albeit, Tim’s is less so, but still notable.**

• Both are related to internet horror in some way. Tiffany creates ‘Scaries’, AKA the Hypnospace version of creepypastas, & Tim is from an Internet horror series, duh.

I couldn’t find a screenshot online in which she talks about her Scaries & I don’t feel like pulling up the game at the moment to grab some screenshots, I’m sorry.

Now, I’ve got another point to add unrelated to character similarities.

Hypnospace Outlaw is an homage to the ‘net. Admittedly, it is in reference to a significantly earlier internet landscape in comparison to when MH takes place. That said, it wouldn’t be too much of a stretch to say they nodded towards one of the most influential webseries ever, right? Or is that just me?

[Edit: it appears that Jay Tholen & Tim Sutton follow each other on Twitter, but that's just me looking way into things. All of this probably is me looking way too into things. I'm autistic.]

*Keep in mind that you don’t have to have epilepsy to have seizures, & it can be caused by other conditions.

**I couldn’t help but smile at Tim’s seizure in #61- not because he was going through it, god no, but rather that it was actually pretty accurate! While I’m diagnosed with absence seizures, I have had an experience with a tonic clonic seizure (edit: I have had far more tc seizures as of late. lol.) in the past, & it was exactly like what happened to Tim. Blacking out, struggling with coordination, & crying. In my case, however, it was far more intense, but y’know, same deal.

So yeah, that was me being so normal (/sar). Goodnight everyone!

[fanartandfanfiction]

Hogwarts Legacy currently untitled Garreth fic!

Madeline’s heart is broken, and it’s Garreth to the rescue! He decides to pose as Maddie’s boyfriend to help her gain her confidence back and to shove it to Andrew Larson.

Did the fact that I have a narcissistic ex named Andrew inspire me to choose him? Noooo! 🤪

Anyway, let me know your thoughts, suggestions, and I definitely need a title. Enjoy! One of these days I’ll figure out why it’s spaced so weird

————————————————————————-

Garreth was sitting in the Gryffindor common room when Madeline Swanson stomped by. They knew each other, and they were friendly, but they’d never been close. However, the common room was mostly deserted at this late hour. “Maddie?”

She jumped and clutched her chest. “You scared the shit out of me!”

“Apologies, I was hiding right here in the middle of the room.”

“I really don’t need your sarcasm right now Garreth.” She sniffed.

“Hang on, Maddie- are you crying?”

“It’s fine. Goodnight.”

“No, it’s not fine.” Garreth jumped up and walked over to her. “What happened?”

“It’s stupid and embarrassing.”

“That’s right in my wheelhouse, I do stupid and embarrassing things all the time.” He ushered her towards the couch he’d been sitting on. “You can talk to me. I’m a good listener.”

She hugged her knees to her chest and sniffed again. “I had a date tonight.”

“Alright. With who?”

“Andrew Larson.”

“Larson…he’s a ravenclaw, right?”

“Yes.”

“What’d he do?”

“God, this is mortifying. I can’t believe I’m telling you this.” Tears started leaking from her eyes and Garreth handed her a box of tissues from the end table. “He left in the middle of the date. To go on a date with someone else. He’d literally scheduled two dates on the same night.”

“What a PRICK!” Garreth couldn’t believe what he was hearing. That was a dick move.

“He said ‘I wasn’t sure this was going to work out so I have a backup.”

“Oh my God. Do you want me to punch him in the face? I’ll do it.”

“No! I just want to forget the whole thing. But that wasn’t even the worst part.”

“It gets worse?!”

“He said a mousy little thing like myself was lucky to go out with him at all. He’d only asked me out of pity. He said I should take what I could get, it wasn’t like I had guys lining up to go out with me.”

Garreth’s jaw was locked and his fists were clenched. “What an ASSHOLE. On a completely different and unrelated subject, do you know how to get into the Ravenclaw common room?”

Madeline laughed and sniffed again. “Come here.” Garreth gave her a comforting smile and he wrapped his arms around her in a hug. “Can I cast the tripping jinx on him?”

“I suppose I couldn’t stop you.” She smiled.

“I think you should go out with someone better. More popular. Really rub his nose in it.”

“He was right, Garreth, it’s not like I have guys lining up to go out with me.”

“Well then have no fear, because your new boyfriend is right here!” Garreth grinned and gestured at himself.

“Garreth, it’s fine, you don’t have to take pity on me.”

“I’m not. Because Andrew is a lying asshole. I know for a fact that several guys have wanted to ask you out. They just thought you weren’t interested.”

“Really? Who?”

“Well I’m not going to tell you that. I don’t need any competition!”

“Don’t waste your time with someone like me. There’s a thousand girls out there that are dying to go out with you.”

“Don’t say things like that about yourself. You’re wonderful, Maddie. And Andrew is the biggest idiot in the world. Go out with me and I’ll prove it to you.”

“Garreth, I appreciate it, but I just don’t feel that way about you. I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright, you don’t have to! It doesn’t have to be real. Just let everyone think it is. I’ll be the best damn fake boyfriend there is.”

“I don’t know, isn’t pretending to have a boyfriend MORE pathetic?”

“No, pathetic is belittling a girl you asked on a date because you’re too much of a chickenshit to admit she’s too good for you.”

Maddie gave him a small smile. “It would be nice to prove him wrong.”

“Exactly! So tomorrow, I’ll ask you out officially. And I’ll do it in history of magic, we have that together and Andrew is in there, isn’t he?”

“Yes. Oh god, I have to face him.” She chewed on her lip nervously.

“You’re going to be completely unbothered. Because you can do so much better.”

“Thank you, Garreth. You don’t have to do this, you know.”

“I know. I want to.”

“Alright. I guess I’ll see you tomorrow. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Maddie.”

Maddie was a nervous wreck. She wasn’t looking forward to facing Andrew after how he’d treated her. She sat down in her seat and tried not to even look in his direction.

“Madeline, I hope you didn’t take yesterday too personally.” He said, approaching her anyway. “We’re just not compatible.”

“It’s fine.”

He opened his mouth to speak again when Garreth slid into the seat beside her. “Hi Maddie. You look really pretty today.” He smiled at her and she blushed.

“Thank you, Garreth.”

“Anyway, I think it’s best if we forget the whole thing.” Andrew said with a condescending smile.

“Forget what?” Garreth asked.

“It’s not really your business, Weasley, but we went on a date.”

“And it didn’t go well? That’s great!” He grinned. “Not great for you, obviously, but Maddie…does that mean you’re single?”

“Yes.”

“In that case, I’d love to take you out sometime. How about tomorrow night?”

“Why?” Andrew asked. Garreth shot him a disgusted look.

“Because girls like Maddie don’t come around very often. And I’m not going to waste my opportunity. So Maddie, what do you say?” Garreth grinned at her.

“I’d like that.” Maddie smiled shyly.

“Really?!” Garreth’s grin widened.

“Yes, that sounds lovely.”

“Sorry, I’m trying to keep my cool, but I kind of thought you’d reject me. I’ll plan something amazing!”

“I’m looking forward to it.”

Andrew huffed and took his seat. Garreth pulled out his phone and texted her.

Garreth 7:59 AM: The look on his face? PRICELESS

Maddie 7:59 AM: It was pretty satisfying :)

Word quickly spread through the rumor mill about Garreth asking Maddie out. He sat down across from Leander at lunch and nodded in greeting.

“So you finally did it!” Leander grinned.

“Did what?”

“You finally asked Maddie out! Everyone’s talking about it!”

“What do you mean finally?”

“Please, everyone knows about your crush on her.”

“I don’t have a crush on Maddie.”

“Really? You’re always smiling and laughing with her.”

“Well I do that with you too and I certainly don’t have a crush on you.”

“Well then why’d you ask her out?” Leander looked confused. Then again, that was kind of how he always looked.

“Because Larson is a dick and told her she couldn’t do better than him. So I offered to be her fake boyfriend and rub his face in the dirt.”

“Are those two separate things or one?”

“Technically one, but I would love to literally rub his face in the dirt.” Garreth grinned. “Keep it to yourself, obviously.”

“Of course. Maddie’s a nice girl. I could go rub Larson’s face in the dirt, we have herbology together.”

“Professor Garlick would have your head!” Garreth snorted.

“I’ll just tell her I’m planting something new I created: douchious bagius.”

“Anyway, he was a massive asshole, so I’m going to make a big show out of dating her and brag about how lucky I am. The things he said to her…”

“What else did he say?” Leander said with a glare.

“That a mousy little thing like her should take what she could get since guys weren’t lining up to go out with her, and that he’d only asked her out of pity.”

“That’s it. He’s dead.” Leander said firmly.

“No, Maddie would be mortified that I told you.”

“I could beat him up for an entirely unrelated reason!” Leander protested.

“Leave it alone for now.”

“I have a class with her and Larson. What if I ask her out too?”

“Just don’t do it today, two of her fellow gryffindors in the same day might be suspicious.”

“I can at least flirt with her a little bit.”

“Fine, just don’t go over the top.” Garrett frowned.

“I don’t have that problem, you do.”

Maddie had just entered the herbology classroom when her phone vibrated.

Prewett 2:55 PM: Don’t be mad, I know about Larson. Let me help you too.

Maddie 2:56 PM: of course Garreth couldn’t keep his mouth shut.

Prewett 2:56 PM: He only told me because I interrogated him. I hate Larson too.

Maddie was embarrassed that Garreth had told Leander about what had happened. She looked up as she heard girlish laughter. Andrew was flirting with Sacharissa Tugwood. Her cheeks burned and she looked away from them. She pulled out a ponytail to tie her hair up and saw Leander approaching.

“Hey Maddie. Are you wearing a new perfume?”

“You really don’t have to do this, Leander.” She said quietly.

“You’re my friend. He’s a dick. I want to.”

“Ok class! Today will be a free period to tend to the plants. Break off into groups of two and pick an area of the greenhouse!” Professor Garlick beamed at them. She was always so happy and perky.

“I’d really like to be partners with you, Maddie.”

“Sure, we can replant the tentacula leaves.” They each put on a pair of gardening gloves and walked over to their station. Unfortunately Andrew and Sacharissa took the station next to them.

“Just ignore them.” Prewett said quietly as he gathered the fallen tentacula leaves. Maddie began digging the holes to replant them.

“Maddie, I’m not sure you’re doing that right.” Prewett said with a smile.

“I’m pretty sure I know how to dig a hole.” Maddie smirked back.

“Here, let me help you.” Leander stood closely behind her, basically leaning over her. He grabbed her hand and guided her in digging the hole. “How’s that?” He smiled down at her from over her shoulder.

“Over the top.” She whispered.

“No, this is. Act like I said something flirtatious to you.” Leander whispered in her ear.

“Prewett!” She giggled and playfully smacked his chest.

“Maddie, you’ve got something on your face.”

“What? Where?”

“Here.” Leander touched her forehead with his dirt-covered glove.

“Prewett!” She laughed and pressed her dirty glove against his forehead too. “There, now we match.”

“Oh I’ll get you for that!” He grabbed her and pulled her backwards against him while she squealed about getting dirt on her uniform.

“Mr. Prewett, Miss Swanson! Please stop fooling around.”

“Yes, professor, apologies.” Maddie smiled. Even Professor Garlick’s harshest voice was sweet.

Prewett still stood slightly behind her while they worked. “I feel like you’re just lurking over my shoulder.” Maddie laughed.

“It’ll be like that Patrick Swayze movie with the pottery scene!” He started humming ‘Unchained Melody’ while covering her hands in the dirt.

“Wouldn’t have pegged you for a sappy movie fan, Prewett.” Andrew said, smirking at him.

“Are you kidding? It’s got crime, a psychic, that hot girl with the short hair, and Patrick Swayze!” He scoffed like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Oh I love ‘Ghost!” Sacharissa piped up. “It makes me cry every time.”

“Me too!” Maddie laughed.

“Oh my god, Maddie, we NEED to have a girl’s night! I can’t get anyone to watch it with me!”

“That actually sounds like fun.” Maddie smiled.

“Do you have my number?”

“I don’t, actually.”

“We’ll fix that! Hand me your phone.” While the girls chattered about how hot Patrick Swayze was, Leander watched Maddie with a smile. She just needed a little prodding to come out of her shell, and now she was chatting with Sacharissa with ease.

“Got your eyes on Swanson, Prewett?” Andrew asked him with a smirk.

“Maybe. What’s it to you?”

“Between you and me, don’t waste your time.”

“And why is that?” Leander asked, clenching his fists.

“She doesn’t put out. Real prudish, that one.”

“Maddie is my friend. You’d better watch your mouth.”

“I’m just telling you the truth, she’s wound up tighter than-“ Andrew didn’t get to finish his sentence before Leander’s fist was crashing into his face. They began fighting and professor Garlick was horrified as she watched them roll across the ground. Andrew was getting a few hits in, but not nearly as many as Prewett.

“Boys! Stop this right now!” They still didn’t listen so she pulled out her wand. “Arresto momentum!” Both boys slowed and she used a levitation charm to levitate Prewett off of Andrew.

“Detention for both of you! Mr. Larson, go to the hospital wing, you’ve got a nasty looking broken nose. Class is dismissed! I need to make sure my babies are alright.”

“Leander, what the hell?!” Maddie helped him to his feet.

“My temper got the best of me.” He grumbled.

“Clearly! Did he say something to you?” Leander looked into her eyes and saw the hurt all over her face. He couldn’t tell her what Andrew had said.

“Yes, but it wasn’t about you. He insulted me.”

“You’ve got a busted lip. Do you need to go to the hospital wing?”

“No, I’m fine.”

“Come here, at least let me help you.” She led him to the sinks outside the classroom and got a paper towel and wet it. “Sit down, you’re too tall.” He did as he was told and she walked over and stood between his legs. She tilted his head up so she could get a better look at his lip. She gently wiped the blood away with the paper towel and Prewett watched her work.

“Maddie, Andrew is an idiot.”

“Quit talking, I’m trying to fix your lip.” She finished washing the blood off and pulled out her wand and muttered a healing spell.

“Where’d you learn to do that?” Prewett asked in shock as he touched his healed lip.

“My mother is a healer.” Maddie said with a smile. “Alright, you’re good to go now.”

“Since our class was canceled, want to go do something?”

“I was just planning on studying and going to the library.”

“I’ll go too.”

“Leander, you really don’t have to stick around me, it’s fine.”

“I know, but you’re my friend, I like spending time with you and I also need to study, so let’s go.”

After his classes were over, Garreth returned to the dorm room he shared with Leander. Leander looked up when he entered.

“Did you get in a fight with Andrew Larson today?”

“A little bit, yeah.” Prewett smiled sheepishly.

“Why?!”

“Because he made some more crude comments about Maddie. I just couldn’t take it.”

“What did he say?”

“Well, I’d been flirting with her and then she went off to talk to Sacharissa and Larson came up to me and said not to waste my time because she wouldn’t put out. He started to say something else but didn’t get to because I broke his nose.”

“You broke his nose?!”

“I would’ve done more than that too if Garlick hadn’t pulled us apart. I got detention for a week, but it was worth it.”

“Damn. Let’s go to dinner and see if we see him.”

They walked into the dining hall and saw Maddie sitting at the Gryffindor table with Natty. They took the seats beside them and Garreth grinned at Maddie.

“By the look on your face, I’m guessing you heard about herbology?” Madeline asked with a small smile.

“I would have loved to have seen it. Larson really needs to keep his mouth shut about you- OW!” Garreth winced as Leander kicked him under the table.

“You said he didn’t say anything about me.” Maddie glared at Prewett.

“Well, um, sort of?”

“Just tell me what he said. Please.”

“Not to waste my time with you because you wouldn’t put out.” There was a choking sound as Natty gasped while she was eating. She coughed and waved their concern away.

“Unbelievable.” Maddie said, staring at her plate.

“If you want to prove him wrong, I’d be happy to sleep with you. OW! Ok, everyone needs to stop kicking me.” Garreth winced and rubbed his leg.

“Then stop saying stupid shit.” Prewett smirked at him. They heard a flurry of whispers and turned around. Andrew Larson came in with two black eyes and quietly sat down at the Ravenclaw table.

“Looks like they at least fixed his nose.” Garreth said. “If it was broken, he wouldn’t be able to look down it at other people.”

“You really did a number on him, Prewett.” Natty said, still staring at Andrew’s black eyes.

“It was well deserved.”

“So Garreth, you finally asked Maddie out on a date?” Natty grinned.

“Why does everyone keep saying that?!” Garreth said, slightly exasperated.

“Everyone knows you have a soft spot for Maddie.”

Garreth felt his phone buzz.

Maddie 5:45 PM: She doesn’t know

He slid his phone back in his pocket. “Ah, well I never imagined she’d actually agree to go out with me, but I saw my shot and took it. Luckily she said yes.”

He saw Leander slide his phone back in his pocket. “He’s been going on and on about her for months, he was driving me crazy.”

“So what are you guys doing for your date?” Natty asked.

“I’m thinking a picnic in a nice sunny spot. We won’t have many warm days left. Might as well enjoy it while we’ve got it!”

“That sounds nice.” Maddie smiled.

“Aw man. Now I want to go on a picnic.” Prewett said sadly. “Natty, do you want to go on a picnic with me?”

Natty looked surprised. “Um, sure?”

“We won’t crash your date though. We’ll go somewhere else.” Prewett grinned at Maddie and Garreth.

“Much appreciated. I want Maddie all to myself.” Garreth grinned and touched her hand under the table.

They all finished dinner and went their separate ways. Now all Garreth had to do was beg the house elves to help him out.

“Come on, Natty, I don’t need to wear a dress!” Maddie protested as Natty shoved one at her. “It’s not even a real date.” She realized her mistake when Natty turned around.

“What?”

“I just meant it’s not like at a restaurant or a posh club. It’s just a picnic.”

“Still, you can look nice. Now let me fix your hair.”

Garreth was attempting to tame his curls and finally gave up. He walked down into the common room where Leander was sitting and struck a pose. “How do I look?”

“Do you want me to answer that truthfully, or…?”

“Just shut up.”

He saw Prewett’ eyes focus over his shoulder. “Daaaamn!”

“What?” He turned around and saw Maddie coming down the stairs. She was a vision of summer. She had on a short white dress that was off the shoulder. It was giving her curves he’d never noticed before. Her legs were long, toned, and tan, and she was wearing wedge sandals that boosted her height. Her brown hair was braided and had little white flowers woven through it. She was talking and smiling with Natty and Garreth thought her eyes practically sparkled. He felt a surprising flutter of nervousness in his stomach.

“Hi Garreth, hi Leander.” She smiled at them and they both just looked at her with their mouths hanging open.

“What?” She asked self consciously. “Is it the dress? I told Natty it was silly.”

“Madeline, they like the dress a little TOO much.” Natty winked at her.

“Oh!” Maddie blushed. “So I look ok?”

“Yes. You look really good.” Garreth finally stammered.

“Thank you! Are you ready to go?”

“Yeah. I think first we should walk around the entire school holding hands so everyone can see you.”

“These shoes are not that comfortable to walk around in.”

“Well we have to at least stop by the dining hall so I can pick up the picnic basket.”

“Bye guys, have fun!” Natty waved. Leander was still gaping at her. “Prewett, put your eyes back in your head.” Natty smacked him upside the head.

Garreth held his hand out. “My lady.” He bowed dramatically.”

“You’re so over the top.” Maddie snorted, but took his hand. As they walked through the halls, Maddie noticed a lot more people looking at her than normal. “Are you sure I’m dressed alright? People keep staring at me and it’s kind of freaking me out.”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but you look shockingly hot.”

“What?”

“Like, I knew you were pretty, but I’ve only seen you in your uniform, and now that you’re not…you’re very attractive.”

“Oh, thank you Garreth.” She looked up and saw her friend Amit Thakkar. “Hi Amit!” She waved at him and he walked right into a pillar, dropping his books. “Oh my god, Amit, are you ok?!” She ran over to him and Garreth snickered to himself.

“H-hi Madeline.” Amit was still looking up at her from the ground. She stuck out her hand to help him up and he looked terrified. “Thanks.” He said, still wide eyed. Garreth handed him his books he’d dropped.

“Are you still available to help me with my astronomy homework tonight? I hate to bother you.”

“No! I mean, yes I’ll still help you, no it’s not a bother.” He chuckled awkwardly.

“Are you sure you’re alright? Oh hang on.” She dusted the dirt off of his chest and he was frozen to the spot. “There!”

“Madeline, you look…” Amit looked like he was struggling for words.

Maddie raised her eyebrows and waited for him to finish his sentence. Garreth elbowed him and it seemed to snap him out of his trance. “Really beautiful.”

“Thank you! You’re so sweet.”

“Um, I have some time now if you wanted to do something before we studied?” Amit asked her, looking nervous.

Garreth glared at him. He knew he wasn’t really dating her, but he felt jealous anyway. Hello, he was RIGHT THERE.

“Sorry Thakkar, she’s all mine. We’re going on a date.” Garreth wrapped an arm around her waist and grinned.

“Ah, alright then, apologies. I’ll see you later.” Amit hurried off.

“He was trying to ask you out right in front of me!” Garreth scoffed.

“I don’t think he was asking me out.”

“Oh he ABSOLUTELY was.”

Garreth took her hand again as they walked down the hall. He wanted people to know she was with him. He felt oddly…possessive? He didn’t really have any right to be. It was nice though, holding her hand and walking together. Most of his relationships (if you could call them that) were quick flings. He listened to Maddie chat about her day and snuck glances at her. He’d had no idea she had a body like that. He’d never really paid attention and she was always wearing her Hogwarts robes.

“Garreth?”

“What?” He snapped back to reality.

“We’re here. You said you had to get the picnic basket?”

“Oh, yes! Stay right here, I’ll be right back.” He leaned forward and kissed her cheek, surprising them both. Maybe that had been too much, but she was smiling. He went to retrieve the basket from the kitchen.

A few minutes later, he was headed back to Maddie with a basket loaded with food (when he’d told them what it was for, they’d been very excited to help) and frowned.

He’d left her alone FOR FIVE MINUTES and Sebastian Sallow was putting the moves on her. That cocky bastard. He had one hand resting on the wall and had essentially trapped Maddie while he flirted with her.

“Sallow, you’d better have a good reason for being so close to my girl.” He said as he approached. Sebastian raised his eyebrows.

“Your girl? Since when?”

“I asked her out yesterday. We’re going on our first date.” He held up the picnic basket

“That doesn’t exactly make her your girl, now does it?”

“Back off, Sallow.”

Sebastian rolled his eyes. “Your guard dog’s got his tail in a twist. Here, let me give you my phone number.” He pulled a pen out of his pocket and grabbed Maddie’s hand and wrote it down. “Text me when you’re bored with Weasley.” Sebastian gave her another suave smile and walked away.

“Before we go, I need to find a bathroom and wash this off.” Maddie wrinkled her nose and looked at her ink-stained hand.

“Don’t want Sallow’s number?” Garreth gave her a teasing grin.

“God no.” He felt a small, selfish bit of happiness. “Be right back.” Garreth watched her walk away and DAMN was that dress working for her. He eagerly waited for her to come back. When she finally did, he held his hand out again.

“Do you know how hard I had to scrub to get that off? Asshole.” Maddie grumbled. “So where are we going?”

“Far enough to be considered private but close enough that people will still see us.”

“That didn’t clarify anything.”

“You’ll see!” He led her to one of his favorite places on the campus, a shady spot beneath a large oak tree. He spread the large picnic blanket on the ground and offered her his hand as she sat. Then he took a seat across from her and opened the basket. “Fair warning, there’s a ton of food. The house elves seemed to think this picnic was for a dozen people.”

“Or maybe they’ve just seen you eat.” Maddie teased.

“It’s not my fault their food is so delicious! I’m a growing boy.” He grinned and began unpacking the basket.

After they had their fill, Garreth and Maddie were still having a good time talking and getting to really know each other.

“I think I’d like to be a healer like my mom. I’ve seen the differences she’s made in people’s lives and I’d like to do that too.”

“Leander said you healed his lip like a pro earlier, so you’re already on your way.”

“I was thinking of asking Nurse Blainey if I could shadow her sometime.”

“I think that’s a great idea! She probably would.”

“What do you want to do?” Maddie asked him.

“You’ll laugh, but probably something with potions.”

“Why would I laugh about that?”

“Because I’m always blowing them up and pissing Sharp off.”

“That’s just because you’re trying to make new potions. You’re not just fooling around. You’re attempting to make something new.”

“Nobody else sees it that way. They think I’m just a menace to the potions classroom.”

“Well I disagree. You think the potioneers that made the potions we use today got it right on the first try?”

“That’s true. It’s kind of like what you said, it’s something I could do to make a difference. I could make a potion to heal someone or cure them of their ailments.”

“I think you’d make a fine potions master. Take over Sharp’s job when he retires.”

Garreth snorted. “I’m pretty sure if he found out I wanted it, he’d just never retire.”

“Yeah you’re probably right.”

They were both leaning back against the big oak tree and watching the sun set on the horizon. Garreth looked over at Maddie and she looked happy. The setting sun was giving her hair a golden glow and making her eyes shine. Garreth suddenly felt very nervous.

“I like talking to you.” Maddie said, fiddling with her braid. “This is probably the most we’ve talked in our seven years of knowing each other.”

“I think you’re right. Why haven’t we talked more?”

Maddie shrugged. “Different circles. Plus you scared me a little.”

“I scared you?!” Garreth laughed.

“Yes! From the moment I met you, you were just so over the top. You were the life of the party, friends with everybody, always so popular…I’m definitely more of an introvert.”

“Apologies, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Garreth smiled at her.

“It’s fine. I’m just glad we’re talking now.”

Garreth looked at the setting sun. “I suppose we should head back now. Ready to go?”

“Sure.” He stood up and offered her a hand to help her up. He packed up the basket and carried it in one hand, and held Maddie’s hand with the other.

“I had fun. You’re a wonderful fake girlfriend, Mads.”

“Am I your fake girlfriend? We’ve only been on one date. That seems awfully fast.” Madeline smiled.

“You’re right. I’ll have to take you out again sometime. Madeline, would you go on a second date with me?”

“I’d like that.” He walked her back to the Gryffindor dorms and stopped outside the common room entrance.

“Um, typically, there’d be a goodnight kiss at the end of the first date if you’re alright with that?” He said nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. Madeline responded by leaning up and gently pressing her lips to his. He kissed her back and let his hand rest on her waist. She pulled away and smiled again.

“Well that was just adorable.” Leander said, coming out of the common room.

“Prewett!” Garreth grumbled.

“I wasn’t spying! I was doing a favor for Natty.”

“Which was?”

“...watching for you guys to come back.”

“Very smooth, Prewett.” Garreth pushed past him and held the door open for Maddie.

“Goodnight Garreth.”

“Goodnight Maddie.”

[another-whump-sideblog]

Jane’s Pets Chapter 72: Anger

TWs in the tags

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“I don’t remember meeting you.” Barron says out of the blue. Diya and Ray went to bed, leaving you alone with it, and… you’re not scared.

That you’re not scared is scary. That trust could be taken advantage of. But it doesn’t change that you trust it.

The two of you are watching a movie, but with Barron’s revelation it’s quickly become background noise.

“Really? It doesn’t seem like the kind thing you can just forget.”

“I know! And like, I can guess. I know that you used to be Jane’s captive and now you’re not, that we rescued you. I know that, but if I try to pull up the actual memory, there’s nothing there. As far as actual memory goes, you weren’t here, and then you were.”

“Huh.” You don’t know what to say to that. The characters on screen argue.

“…you would tell me, if I… did something, right?”

“What?”

“It’s just- people I don’t remember or recognize hate me. And Diya and Ray reference conversations I don’t remember having, and I always wonder, what if I did something bad and I didn’t remember? So you would tell me, right? Or Diya, or Ray. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

“Sure. Of course.” You want to comfort it, but you can’t figure out what to say. “Um… I think I remember most of the times we’ve ever interacted. Maybe it’s hard for you to trust yourself when you don’t remember everything, but I remember mostly everything, and I trust you. I’m sure Diya and Ray feel the same way. And… Diya told me a while ago that night isn’t a good time to decide whether or not you’re a good person, and ey was right.”

Barron relaxes, smiling slightly. “I remember that. I really should go to bed. I only ever worry about if I’m hurting my friends without knowing it when I should be asleep. The rest of the time I worry more about if I’ll forget something important like- like you want to go by Liam now and Ray changed their name again, and all of you have triggers that would be really bad if I forgot, and what if I have an argument with someone and then the next day I’ve just forgotten? Or a deep conversation, or- anything! I try to write down everything I know I’ll want to remember, but what if I forget to? And it feels wrong to write down the traumas you guys tell me about, but it would be worse if you got up the courage to talk about something and I just forgot!” It sighs. “Sorry. None of this is your problem. I just wanted to make sure that if I ever, like, hurt your feelings or scare you and then forget about it, you know you can tell me. That I’m not trying to pretend it never happened.”

“Oh, yeah. I’d talk to you about it.”

“Thank you.” For just a moment, Barron looks more exhausted than you’ve ever seen it. Completely worn down. But then it’s gone. “How about we finish this movie another time?” It suggests. “I’m ready to go to bed.”

“Yeah. Of course.”

Barron turns off the TV and leaves to its bedroom. “G’night, Liam.”

“Goodnight.”

You lie back on the couch. You aren’t sure what made Barron bring up that topic of conversation.

You don’t always remember things you think you should remember, moreso after your head injury, but you’ve never wondered if you’d forgotten hurting someone. You also don’t have people you don’t remember who are mad at you, though, so you can see where Barron’s coming from.

You can’t imagine Barron doing anything horrible. That doesn’t mean much, though. Lots of people would’ve said the same about you, and you’ve killed and tortured people.

You wish you knew what to say to help it. It’s done so much for you and comforted you when you were freaking out, and you want to return the favor. You were never able to repay Kitty and Puppy’s kindnesses, either. You’re never able to help, everyone helps you and gets hurt because of you and you can never help, and it’s so damn frustrating.

But nighttime isn’t a good time to think about this. So you close your eyes, swallow your frustration, and hope your sleep will be nightmare free.

~~

Kitty is a being of pure spite and rage. Jane wants a cat, and they’ll give her a cat, but not some pet. They’re a lion, a tiger, a panther, a big cat pacing captivity until their captor gets close enough that they can bite her head off.

They hate that Jane saw them so… pathetic. Asking to be fixed. She won’t see anything like that again. They have their anger back and they’re not letting go, they’ll never let ago again, they’ll be angry for the rest of their life just to piss Jane off.

There’s no point in being compliant. They’ll be punished anyway. Better to be a wild cat locked in the basement than a housecat upstairs. Better to be tortured by physical pain than by trying and failing to be someone they’re not.

They won’t change their mind this time. They won’t, they won’t. They’ll take pain and deprivation and everything just to show Jane that they don’t belong to her.

They are /not/ broken, and if they are, Jane is the problem, not the solution. They are someone who sees through the bullshit and doesn’t follow rules that don’t make sense, and if that sets them apart from other people, so be it.

And Puppy and Bunny do like them. They know they do.

Kitty screams even though they can’t hear themself. They scream just to annoy Jane the tiniest bit, just to make her life slightly worse.

Two minutes later, they are crying and begging to be let out of sensory deprivation.

~~

The four of you play Clue. You’re good at Clue. You’re good at most board games. You’ll keep a careful eye on Ray to make sure they’re not cheating, and you’ll watch the movie afterwards and have popcorn and treats and peppermint tea.

Diya is goofily pretending that ey did the murder, and eir first move is going to the bathroom with the knife. “Not to wash off the blood,” ey says, “I just need the knife in here so that I can figure out if that was the right weapon! That makes sense. I’m making sense right now.”

It’s pretty dumb, and ey repeats the same joke several times. Ray looks at em with what you can only interpret as pure adoration.

Barron shows Diya a card, which you note on your paper. If Barron has nothing to show for two of those in the future, you’ll know which one it showed Diya and be able to rule it out.

On Barron’s turn, it also checks the bathroom, and Diya hides eir hands behind eir back and scolds Barron for not knocking first. You think they’d love Kitty’s version of The Game of Life. You show Barron a card representing its game piece, Plum.

The game continues in a similar matter, with Diya and Greg more focused on making each other laugh than the game itself. You don’t mind. Maybe they’ll slip up and reveal something.

Ray is much more tactical, though they play along when Diya tries to drag them into eir jokes. Ray’s the only one who might beat you.

Your head is starting to hurt, keeping track of everything. This used to be easy. This used to be easy! You’ve always been good at board games. And it’s a fucking game. It shouldn’t be so taxing it makes your head hurt, this is for fun. It used to be easy!

You’ve been missing information, spacing off or getting distracted. You’re supposed to be good at this. You’ve always been good at this.

If you can’t even play games without getting a headache, what can you do? What future can you have, if everything that requires even a bit of concentration hurts and hurts and hurts.

Your eyes sting, but you’re not going to cry over a stupid game. You’re not that pathetic.

Jane took everything from you. She took the ability to play games painlessly from you. She made you afraid of Mac ‘n Cheese and not wearing a collar and saying your own name.

Diya makes a guess, and ey’s right. Ey wins, and ey was just goofing around the whole time, while you were tracking every piece of information. Or, trying to.

You throw your cards to the ground and race out the front door. You need to go for a walk. Maybe a bit of an overreaction, but better than yelling at em over winning a game or letting any of them see you cry over a game.

You don’t know why you’re so self conscious. They’ve seen you cry over sillier things. You’re so pathetic, they’ve done everything for you and you stormed out on them instead of explaining why you were upset. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Stupid Bunny. You’re always more stupid lately. Jane took your intelligence from you too.

Diya steps out of the cabin. “Liam, are you okay?”

You stop, but don’t answer.

“Did our joking about murder upset you?”

You shake your head.

“…Do you want to be alone?”

You don’t say anything. Diya approaches you slowly, looking concerned.

You shrug.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“I- I used to be really good at Clue.” You grumble, trying to keep your anger under control.

“You’re still really good at it! There’s just also, like, luck involved.”

“I know.”

“It’s okay to lose at these things sometimes.”

“I know. I know!” Diya thinks you’re stupid too. Everyone thinks you’re stupid, stupid Bunny. “I’m not that dumb, I know there’s luck involved, you’re not listening!”

Diya steps back. Is ey scared of you? That’s not fair, you haven’t done anything! You left so that you could calm down and ey followed you! “You- you never listen! I’m getting dumber and I can’t remember things as well as I used to and I’m never going to be smart again and no one is listening! I’m not Liam anymore, I’m just the dumb Bunny she made me into and I can’t even play games I used to like without getting a headache and she took it from me, I’m never going to be happy again! Everything that used to make me happy hurts!”

“…You’re Liam. Trauma changing you doesn’t mean that you’re who she tried to make you into, and it doesn’t mean you won’t be happy again.”

“You just- you- everything you say is like it’s out of a psychology textbook!”

Diya takes a deep breath. "I don’t think I’ve ever seen you angry before. It’s okay to be angry. But… I don’t think you’re angry at me.”

“No shit! She tortured me! She- she made- she- I used to like myself! I used to be good at things! I was- I could be happy! I could sleep without nightmares and- and I can’t be happy anymore! I can’t do the things I used to be able to do and it’s her fault!”

“She’s an awful person.”

“She’s a monster! I hate her, I hate what she did to me! And to Puppy and Kitty and everyone! I hate her! I hate her so much. Her stupid laugh and her stupid… face. She ruined so many lives just because she was bored. I hate her…” You’re already losing steam.

“Me too. I agree, she sucks. We’re on the same page. I hope that when we find a way to kill her, it hurts as much as all the pain she’s inflicted on others. But… is it okay if I share one disagreement with you?”

“What out of what I’ve said could you possibly disagree with?”

“She wanted to ruin your life. She wanted to make it so you could never be happy again and to make you into another person. But Liam, she failed. You escaped. Your life isn’t over. You can still be happy. It’s good that you’re angry. It’s good that you understand that you didn’t deserve anything that happened, and that it was all her fault. But… you aren’t taking it all the way. You’re still believing some of her lies. She wants you to think you can never be happy again, and I think that this anger you’re feeling… you can harness it to prove her wrong.”

“You still sound like a psychology textbook.”

“I know. It’s the best I can do right now. If you’re still upset, you should let it all out. I’ll be here if you want, or leave if you want.”

Mostly, you just feel kind of drained. “I feel better. I’m sorry I yelled at you.”

“It’s okay. Come inside, then, if you’re feeling better. We’ll watch a funny movie and have some treats and prove Jane wrong. She didn’t take everything from you, even if she tried. You can be happy, even if it’s different from the kinds of happiness you had before.”

You go inside with Diya. Barron and Ray don’t ask what happened, but you explain anyway, and they both repeat that it’s good to be angry about what happened, so long as you aren’t taking out your anger on other people.

Then you watch Clue, and it’s a good movie. Diya says eir favorite lines along with the characters and Ray puffs and shakes their hands and Barron relaxes, a soft smile on its face.

Diya was right. You think Jane would be annoyed to see you having a good time, and you like that thought. You like the idea of pissing her off by living a joyful and safe life.

After the movie, you hold your collar in your hands and say "I want to burn it.”

Barron gets you a lighter and you all outside.

It takes a while to light. It’s made of sturdy material. But eventually, it burns, and you drop it to the ground and watch the flammable parts of the collar burn and the buckle melt, and you let yourself feel angry that she ever made you wore it, and you’re not afraid at all.

~~

Puppy knows better than to get angry. She knows. She’s learned.

Puppy is kneeling on the floor by the couch. Master sits on the couch and pets her hair. She’s doing something on a laptop, probably something illegal to get money for food and clothes and however this place gets power and water. Or maybe she’s gathering information on someone, or she’s found a way to torture people over the internet. It doesn’t matter. Puppy can’t do anything about it.

“I didn’t expect Kitty to have so much more trouble with compliance than obedience. Isn’t it wonderful, that they can still surprise me?” Puppy wonders, for a moment, if Master is talking to the computer, before realizing she’s talking to her. Not that it matters.

“Pain and fear kept them obedient, but it only works short term with compliance. Of course, I could keep it to short-term, and make sure they’re in pain and afraid often, but that might backfire and make them think they’ll get hurt no matter what they do, so they might as well disobey. Punishments will always hurt worse than reminders, but mortals aren’t always smart enough to choose correctly.” Master tugs on one of the straps of Puppy’s muzzle. Puppy doesn’t make a sound.

“They might be more agreeable if they knew someone else would get hurt if they were defiant. I bet I could find their family. I know they’re not super close to any of them, but it would probably pack a stronger punch than hurting a stranger. And there’s you of course, and Bunny, once I’ve brought him back. And a stranger would do in a pinch, especially if it’s someone more vulnerable.”

Puppy isn’t angry about Master’s casual attitude towards torture. It wouldn’t help. There’s no point to being angry. So she’s not angry. She knows better.

“Maybe I’ll just hit their head over and over until they can’t remember anything from before being mine.”

Anger just makes people make dumb decisions. Puppy’s not dumb.

“But that might have unintended side effects. Really, I think the most effective strategy here will be drugs. First to keep them too out of it to feel the need to defy, and then because they’ll be dependent on something only I can give them.”

Anger just makes it harder to be obedient. Puppy knows better. Soon, she hopes, Kitty will too.

A/N: Let me know if I should tag anything else!

Tag list: @eatyourdamnpears @whump-in-the-closet @scp-1296 @fuzzybucketz

[shions-new-blog-of-stuff]

"Another Reunion"

Plaga Leon x OC

Part I

Part II

Three days ago

Morgan hurried down the corridor pushing a stretcher.

"Almost there," she said to the person lying in it--Leon.

Leon, mind hazy from the sedatives, could only slightly turn his head and nod.

"I don't...remember this part of the building..." he replied, voice raspy.

"Think of it as a hidden tunnel." Morgan stopped to unlock the old, rusty door whose paint was faded and chipped. The door clicked and she pushed it open, "There were plans to renovate this area, I dunno the full details. So, you know, access restricted to most of us. Until now."

She pushed the stretcher past the door, "You know Bennett, right? The guy who brings you food? He and I did some... research I guess. Found the floor plans and these keys in Campbell's office. Wanted to bust you out right away but, these things just take time..."

"Why are you helping me?"

Morgan stopped, and placed a hand on his shoulder. There appeared to be sorrow in her hazel eyes.

"Leon...I wanted to cure you. I really, really did. But everyone else..." she replied, her voice cracking, "...Lost my pops to this virus shit... Just can't let that happen again, not to a good man like you."

Leon felt his ears grow warmer than usual, "Okay...so what's the grand plan after this little jailbreak of yours?"

"Well," she answered, opening a door with a broken EXIT sign and pushing the stretcher out the door to an underground parking lot, dark and devoid of life, "I made some calls, some emails, and we're going on a road trip."

She pulled out a flip phone and dialed a number. A few minutes passed and the headlights of a car flashed. The vehicle was a silver sedan, and slowly appearing from the darkness.

The driver's side door opened and a tall, slim man in a long blue coat stepped out of the car. Morgan was helping Leon stand.

"Our getaway driver?" Leon asked dryly.

"Yer damn right I am," the slim man responded as he walked up to the two, reaching out for a handshake, "Lindsey Stanley. 's nice to meet you...ahem...Leon, right?" His skin was lightly tanned, with some wrinkles here and there.

Leon almost stumbled and fell over, but Morgan managed to catch him.

Stanley...why does that sound familiar?

Lindsey studied Leon's features, "You're the one who brought my niece home. From the...what was it, human trafficking?"

Leon mustered enough strength to stand on his own, "Long story. Stanley is your last name, and your niece...wait..."

"He's my uncle," a soft, familiar voice called out from behind Lindsey.

Catherine stepped forward, wringing her hands. Time seemed to stop when she and Leon made eye contact.

She had to hold him up somewhat when they embraced, his strength was spent.

"... Cath..."

Lindsey looked around, "Reunion's good 'n all, but we need to get on the road before all this goes pear shaped."

In the car, Catherine reached over to tap Lindsey on the shoulder, "Are you really okay with this, Uncle? This... this is all...so..."

Lindsey tilted his head, "Cathy, I trust him. How could I not trust the man who saved my niece's life?"

Leon was struggling to stay awake, but everything was becoming a blur. Being here, in Catherine's lap, instead of strapped to a hospital bed surrounded by surgical lights, made him feel more at ease.

"'ey, Leon," Lindsey continued, "Now that I got th' chance, I jus' wanna say thanks. You need anything, go on and ask. Sound good?"

Leon grunted in approval, he and Morgan falling asleep almost simultaneously.

Lindsey turned the heater on a little higher, "Try 'n catch some Z's too, Cathy. I'll see if we can stop somewhere. Sleep in an actual bed, yeah?"

Catherine nodded, "Okay..."

She held Leon's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, "Goodnight..."

@squashfics @mishwanders @notrattus

[demonologue]

Tavuary weekly prompt 1: Fluff

I’m sure camp is a favourite place for many of us, but it is legitimately the best part of the game for me. The wild and untamed boost of ace serotonin I get from tucking the party in for the night and giving them all forehead kisses... I have to force myself not to long rest more than necessary.

Title: All Is Well

Characters: Gale, Lae'zel, Shadowheart, Astarion, Scratch, Tav

Rating: T

Summary: Just a druid dad doing his best to take care of this found family.

All Is Well

Finally, another long day has come to an end. Camp has gone quiet in that way it tends to do when fatigue is about to win out over the hunger, petty squabbles, and inventory management. It’s time to tuck everyone in before your long rest. 

You start with Gale. Maybe it’s cheating to get the bedtime story first, but he’s so good at telling them. It always makes you smile. Is he for real? It doesn’t matter. Sometimes finding joy in what’s on the surface is safe. You know his secret, and you have an agreement about it. Just like your agreement with Lae’zel to murder each other if you start to turn. 

She’s next, giving you a curt nod as you walk over. That leather undergarment is something. She’s something. You want to tell her how impressed you are with all the progress she’s made in the short time you’ve known one another. Is she young for a Githyanki? You have no damn clue. But she feels like a new recruit somehow. You want to give her the space respect demands, but you also want to support her when she lets you. It happens now and then. The two of you have made progress. 

“Greetings.” A lot of progress.

“Just coming by to say goodnight,” you tell her. “I’d say sweet dreams, but I feel like you’ll just curse at me in Gith.” 

She does. “K’chakhi.” But there’s a certain quirk to her lips. Maybe it’s just you, but her insults sound more affectionate than they used to.

You chuckle. “See you in the morning.” 

“Not if I see you first, istik.”

You walk away smiling. Ignore Astarion, as he stands outside his tent, poised like an actor about to monologue, pretending to read. There will be no sweet good night there. 

You have an agreement with him, too, but it’s a sinister, one-sided one. You know you’re being used, but it’s the only thing he’ll accept from you right now. Will it be enough to facilitate a change later? Is change even possible for someone like him? 

You’re ready to do what is necessary if he shows his true colors or harms the others. For now, you’ve agreed to watch one another’s backs, and you think he might be considering loosely holding up his end of the bargain. That has to be enough for now. But he gets no good night. You feel sure he’d just reply with a snarky retort anyway.

Finally, you’re here. And you just watch Shadowheart praying quietly for a few moments. She looks up and sees you before you make yourself known. “Lady of Sorrows guide us. Did you want something?” There’s always this sadness that lingers in the air around her, but right now, it’s more concentrated. Like a dart fired into the shield of devotion with which she guards her heart. 

“You alright?” you ask softly. 

“What a strange thing to ask.” She stands and turns her back to you, pretending to look out at the horizon. Her tone is clearly an imitation of someone else. Perhaps that Mother Superior she’s told you about. Someone cold and uncaring. But it’s not her. 

“Is it?” You move up to stand behind her. Just out of arm’s reach, you feel it before you see it. Tears like starlight slipping down her cheeks. “Oh, kitten. I’m sorry.” 

You never know what to say to her. Nothing is ever quite right. And words are never enough. So you move close and rest your chin on top of her head, careful not to touch her with any other part of you. This is your secret language, just the two of you. How you ask permission. 

“I don’t know–!” Her voice cuts off, her shoulders trembling. You gently wrap your arms around her, and just stand quietly as she cries. Like a comforting tree bearing silent witness. Eventually, she turns toward you and rests her head against your chest. She never returns the embrace, and that’s perfectly okay. 

Times like this, it’s hard for you, too. Hard not to think about the little girl who will never grow into a woman. How much this woman, trying so hard to hide the little girl inside her, reminds you of your own daughter. Maybe the stoic tree lets slip a tear, too.

“I’m so proud of you,” you tell her softly. “You’re doing so well. Better and better every day.” 

This summons forth more tears. The clerics of Shar are not big on positive reinforcement, you guess. 

“Thank you,” she says at last, when the tears have finally subsided. Shadowheart steps back, and it’s over, her autonomy restored. She stands on her own again. 

“Any time,” you tell her warmly. And grin. “Don’t tell the others, but you know...you’re my favourite.” 

It startles a half smile from her. “You’re the only one I trust, so I suppose you’re mine, too.” 

“Sleep tight,” you tell her with a little wave. “Don’t let the–er. Well. If he does, make sure it’s consensual.” 

“I’d sooner kill him.” 

“That’s my girl.” The ghost of a smile remains as you walk back to the campfire, feeling more tired with every step. 

“Were you two talking about me again? I feel like you were.” Silent feet fall into step beside you. “You know I can always tell.”

“Would you just fuck off?” So much for savoring a moment. His pervasive anxiety is toxic and contagious. Of course he listens to everything everyone says, always. Surrounded by shadows, this one, mind and body. 

“Honestly, darling, you’re not quite my type.” 

“Go to bed, Astarion.” 

“I thought that’s what we were attempting to arrange. Or you were. As I said, I’m not much interested in the big, muscley, goody-goody type.” He waves a hand in your direction, gesturing idly at ‘all that.’

“Go sleep on your own bedroll. Alone. Please.” He gets under your skin too easily. You don’t mean to speak so harshly, but you always do. Take a deep breath. “When you’re ready. Obviously, I’m not telling you what to do.” 

“Bloody well right you’re not!” He looks down his nose at you the way he always looks down his nose at you (which is a neat trick, considering he’s almost a foot shorter than you are). That effortless air of superiority mixed with naked disgust. His sickly sweet tone drifts back to you over his shoulder as he slinks away: “Sweet dreams~” 

You bite back the urge to tell him to fuck off again. “Behave.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it, darling.”

You know deep in your gut, you’re going to have to kill him eventually. But not today. Please, gods. Can you just rest, just this once? 

You must have been more tired than you thought. When you open your eyes, everyone else is sound asleep, gathered around the fire. You have that dizzy feeling that means your nightly offering has been accepted. Glance over and see him resting silently with the others. It’s the only time he looks remotely at peace.

At the edge of the firelight, Scratch looks out watchfully at the darkness. You call for him in a language he understands, and he pads over to lie down, his comforting bulk leaning against you. You push your fingers into his soft, white fur and slip into a blissfully dreamless sleep.

[emberswrites]

8, 12 and 17 for the ask game?

8. What happens if one of them gets sick?

They are both very bad patients but Kakashi is worse, at least at first. Still trying to work. But they both didn't really have anyone to take care of them when they were sick before, they did for a bit but not for long and they don't remember the feeling. Being sick before just meant being alone, miserable, and feeling weak. But now they have each other and realize hey it's not so bad, this being pampered business. Of course they take good care of each other, make food, draw each other baths, massages, bringing each other whatever they need.

Sasuke will put Kakashi's head in his lap and stroke his hair until he falls asleep. Kakashi makes him read erotic novels out loud to him when he's sick, too. Because he's a troll. Sasuke will grumble at him the entire time he's fussing around Kakashi but it just makes Kakashi smile because Sasuke care so damn much and is being so attentive. He also scares away anyone that comes to bother Kakashi while he's on sick leave.

When Sasuke is sick Kakashi is SO EXTRA SOFT with him. You've never seen anything so tender. He summons the ninken to sleep around him and keep him company if he has to leave but otherwise will work from home and take all his meetings in their house. He cooks him the best, most nutritious food.

12. Do they have many heated arguments? How do they smooth things over?

I would say not many heated ones. By the time they get together they're both in better places mentally and just with themselves so they're not quick to anger. But every couple has disagreements of course. Kakashi I think would get quiet. Meaning when he's at his wits end he shuts down, stops engaging until he's ready, feels calmer, has thought things through. You can imagine that's hard for Sasuke, him being there but not giving him attention, kind of a cold shoulder. But Kakashi doesn't act like he isn't there or anything, if an argument lasts a few days, he will still kiss him goodnight, sleep beside him, do the usual things around the house; he's just more withdrawn. Sasuke is more reactive, when he's really into it probably says his piece and then leaves for a bit to cool off. He doesn't stay away overnight or anything (not anymore).

I think they finally think things through or miss each other too much and finally hash it out, talk. This is where it's good that 1. Sasuke doesn't hide his feelings and is very honest which forces Kakashi to be, too. and 2. Kakashi is very patient with Sasuke and is pretty good with keeping things level and avoiding escalation.

17. Who's more likely to pull the other in by the waist and kiss them passionately?

SASUKE. 100%. In public, sometimes. Listen. What you need to understand is Sasuke is attractive yes but EVERYONE wants Kakashi. Or fantasizes about him. Or just thinks "Damn, if I were straight/gay/younger/older etc". He is the ultimate man, I'm sorry. So of course Sasuke is aware of this and he is the more jealous/possessive between them and sometimes he just can't help but remind everyone who Kakashi comes home to.

Also Sasuke's just impatient, Kakashi likes to tease him until he's the one that can't stand it and pounces usually. But of course he also will pull Sasuke in and kisses the thoughts right out of his mind, too.

[thmgau]

CHAPTER 1 - THE PROPHECY [wattpad link]

---

Long, long ago, a prophecy was foretold by Fate itself. A prophecy of good & evil, a prophecy of light & dark. One day, far, far into the future, 5 heroes will emerge & save the multiverse from destruction, maintaining balance between the goods & the evils of this world.

These 5 heroes, even though they may not show it or believe it, have strengths & qualities beyond their wildest dreams. Passion, hospitality, kindness, flexibility, patience... this was how Fate had described the prophesied heroes. Even though she had never met these heroes yet, she could see far into the future, & she knew these were the ones.

Now here we are: January 14th, 2023. 5 friends sat in an apartment complex, having a sleepover. They were eating snacks & talking about the logistics of whether Kirby could beat Sonic the Hedgehog in a fight.

“Sonic would just run out of the way, though!” Kalani said. “He’s, like, the fastest thing alive, right?” “But if Kirby inhaled him & got his powers, Kirby would be just as fast as Sonic is!” Juniper replied, taking a bite out of a pretzel. “Then they’d just be the exact same speed.” Cherry rolled her eyes. “It’s an unwinnable battle for both of them.” “If Kirby inhaled Sonic & spat him off of, say, a rooftop, there’s no way Sonic’s surviving that. Kirby wins.” Nora said. “Kirby’s too nice for that, though!” Leslie said, crossing their arms. “They wouldn’t even be fighting in the first place. They would be eating chili dogs together.” “Then it’s a contest to see how many chili dogs they can eat.” “Well, that’s just unfair for Sonic! Kirby would eat all of them before Sonic even had a chance to take a bite.” “Maybe Sonic just has a skill issue then.” “Sonic does NOT have a skill issue!”

Cherry yawned. “Damn, I’m tired.” “It is getting a little late. Maybe we should all conk out for the night.” Kalani said, checking the time on his phone. “Yeah,” Leslie mumbled, pulling a blanket over itself. “I’m heading to sleepies. Goodnight!” “G’night!”

The 5 of them soon fell asleep, all cozy & warm in the living room, & nothing questionable happened during that night at all.

That was a lie, by the way. Something very questionable & strange happened that night. 

It was a dream. It didn’t feel like a dream, but it didn’t feel NOT like a dream, either. Not a lucid dream, & most certainly not a fever dream. They were simultaneously alone & together at the same time, standing before a shadowed figure. 

The figure approached them, holding a necklace in its hands.

“Heroes of the prophecy,” the shadow’s voice echoed in their minds. “You have been chosen to maintain the balance between good & evil in this world, as decided by Fate itself.”

The figure held up the necklace. “The necklace will guide your way.” it said. “Find your way to the book. You will know what to do from there.”

As morning crawled its way into Cincinnati, Cherry, Nora, Leslie, Juniper, & Kalani awoke. 

“Ugh, my head hurts..” Cherry grumbled, holding their palm up to their forehead. “Same..” Kalani yawned. “I had a really weird dream last night. There was this tall shadow thing & it handed me a necklace that looked kind of like a tie &-” “& it said to find some book?” “I- Yeah, it did.. how did you know?” “I had that dream too.” “Now that you mention it, I also had a dream like that.” “I did, as well.” “Did we all have the same dream?” “I guess so.”

Cherry sighed. “It probably means nothing. Juni, do you know where you keep your tylenol?” “Bathroom. In the mirror cabinet.” “Thanks.” She got up & headed toward the bathroom.

Leslie got up as well. “You all want some breakfast? I can make some if you want.” “That’d be awesome, Les.” “Alright, let’s see what Juni has in faer fridge.” it said, heading toward the kitchen. As it opened the refrigerator, a scream rang out from the bathroom. Everyone’s heads perked up.

“Cherry!” Nora called out. “You ok?!” “NO!!!” they yelled back.

The other 4 all rushed to the bathroom to see what the matter was. Cherry stood in front of the mirror, bottle of tylenol in her hands, & a red tie necklace around her neck.

“What’s wrong?” “The necklace!! Where did it COME FROM?” “Isn’t that the necklace we all saw in our dreams?” “Well, my necklace was green.” “Mine was yellow.” “Hey,” Leslie pointed at the mirror. “We’re all wearing necklaces too.” “Huh?”

Everyone looked at the mirror. They were, indeed, wearing almost-identical tie necklaces. Nora’s was yellow, Leslie’s was gray, Juniper’s was green, & Kalani’s was blue.

“Jesus christ. It’s like we sleep-walked our way to a jewelry store & stole these or something.” “Jewelry stores don’t sell tie-shaped necklaces.” “Well, where else would we get these?” “..maybe the dream wasn’t a dream?”

Everyone turned toward Leslie.

“What do you mean it ‘wasn’t a dream?’ We were all VERY MUCH asleep.” “You all remember that shadow figure from the dream, right? It gave us the necklaces in the dream, & now we’re all wearing the necklaces!” “That’s.. physically not possible.” “If it’s not possible, why did it happen, eh?”

“Didn’t the shadow figure mention a book?” Nora perked up. “The necklaces are supposed to guide us to some book.” “There’s tons of books in this world! That would take literally forever!” “If this so-called book is real, it would have to be relatively close to us, right? Whatever this shadow figure is wouldn’t hide a book in, like, Europe or something.” “You have a point. I guess.” “We should get some breakfast first, though, & there’s barely anything to cook with in your fridge, Juni.”

Juniper crossed her arms. “What, you can’t make a hotdog breakfast, Les?” “No.” “Well, where DO we get breakfast, then?”

The group thought about it for a moment.  “Oh! I got it!” Kalani said. “There’s this new banana restaurant that opened up recently. We could go there!” “Banana restaurant?” “Yeah. Restaurant that sells bananas. & banana-themed foods.” “..doesn’t hurt to try, I guess.” “Alright! Let’s go!!”

[yandere-sins]

Yandere diavolo taking care of their s/o after getting them pregnant kekkekkske, I've seen 2 types of people write this, 1.how they got their s/o pregnant 2.after the baby was born ;-; , bruh, what the heck happened in between? What if the s/o tried running away while pregnant, what did diavolo do?? I need answers

Let me indulge you then! ^^

»»———————— ♡ ————————««  

♡ The pregnancy is a bit of a double-edged sword. Diavolo is ecstatic! He loves the idea of becoming a dad and all the family stuff you three get to do once the little one is born. He’s already planning trips and public appearances, and tells you about the fantastic birthdays you’ll celebrate with the kid and how he’s going to teach his child swimming and magic and all the royal shebang (spoiler: he won’t). Everything is fantastic and awesome in his world now that he’s expecting a royal heir, announcements are being made, and he celebrates every inch of belly you’re gaining with his child growing inside you. Every day, new presents arrive at your suit, both from other royals and influential figures, as well as Diavolo. And if he thinks it isn’t enough, he’ll order a few dozens more once he comes back after work so you two can spend some more time together and unwrap. The amount of pacifiers you own in the first week of your pregnancy is nightmarish. He’s much more attentive and careful, treating you like a fragile doll, whether you hate it or love it. And damn, when a prince kneels before you to massage your feet, how can you ever complain about all the ways he wronged you in the past?

♡ But... well. That is the extent of it. The palace has enough bathrooms, so he doesn’t need to stick around for your morning sickness. He has to work, surely you understand that he leaves you feeling like shit, right? His offer to massage your feet is not only a painful experience as it is a singularity. You can hire the best masseurs in Devildom, but once was enough for Diavolo, and he’ll childishly overhear and ignore it if you ever complain and ask for one in the future. In the evening, he comes over, lounging, forcing you to relax with him and let him feel your belly. He’s totally in awe when he gets to experience the first kicks, and you tell him the child can hear him now. Only to kiss you goodnight right after and leave you all alone at night to deal with your various feelings about the situation. It’s strange because he’s involved, but then... isn’t. He’s there for the good moments but never the rough patches, always leaving you in the care of servants instead of dealing with whatever is bothering you. He swears up and down he loves you, but somehow, now that you could actually need a partner, he’s giving you the cold shoulder.

♡ Even though you aren’t allowed to attend them, Diavolo throws lavish parties in your and his child’s honor, drinking, smoking, and celebrating. All the things devils do to honor and bless the child of the future king, while you have to deal with the music echoing through the desolated halls, guards complaining about having to work while everyone gets to play and have fun. You are alone and left to your own devices, hormonal, and without being granted any fun like parties or even taking longer walks ever since you became pregnant to prevent anything from happening. If things go downhill, a very tipsy Diavolo comes to visit you for some kisses and touches. Maybe more. That’s when things become weird, however, as he starts getting very emotional. He rarely asks for your opinion on matters. Still, he keeps questioning if you like being pregnant and if you’re happy to have his baby. How happy are you? Do you love the child more than him? Do you want to get rid of it? Diavolo hints (not so subtle) at being jealous that you spend so much time with your child compared to him. He reveals how unhappy it makes him that you two don’t get to do the things anymore you did before and how he misses those times. It’s bizarre since he’s usually so happy about his child and dismissive of you at the same time that his change of heart seems very misplaced. That rings some very new alarm bells in your head, doesn’t it?

♡ Your escape chances were slim already before getting pregnant. You don’t think he didn’t up the guards just in case you decide now was the perfect time after it went so well between you two for a while? Admittedly, that idea to keep you under stricter watch was whispered to him by many like-minded individuals with a little bit more experience. Even if he didn’t like having you guarded by eyes that don’t deserve to watch you all day long, he still makes sure to put more guards in front of your windows and doors. Diavolo can be a bit lenient with you at times, always having a soft spot and wanting to respect you as long as it suits him. But you can be sure as hell you’ll lose that privilege of his trust once you escape from him. He can’t even punish you, but his anger drives him to turn over every stone, uproot every tree, and rebuild entire houses in all of Devildom to find you. An added difficulty for you is that your freedom is short-lived. There are more people who are interested in your child (more than you, and some even more than the reward promised for returning you). It is Diavolo’s child, after all. That little bundle of nightmares joy has the royal magic, the access to everything the royal family hides, and if everything breaks, will make an excellent bargain. Life’s becoming dangerous. Just like Diavolo always feared, there are so many people after you that he can’t even count who to get rid of first. And with every second you’re gone, his anxiety spikes, and his thoughts muddle until he’s one raging demon you wished you had never crossed paths with. At least he swears to burn anyone to crisps, eradicate their souls and existences from the universe if they touch you. Even if you end up losing the baby to someone, Diavolo’s priority is getting you back, safe and healthy, to be locked into your room for all eternity with no moment of privacy even when he’s with you. Guarded 24/7. And maybe, once he unleashed all the anger he’s been harboring, he’ll think of getting the child back. The world will burn for anyone who meddled with his happy little family. That’s something you can be sure of.

[widovv]

i shouldn’t even be thinking it, much less writing it down

a playlist for the thirteen letters + the long way around or, bucky’s writing in not easily conquered, by dropdeaddream and whatarefears

{ 8tracks | spotify }

Anyway, Jesus — I shouldn’t even be thinking it, much less writing it down. I used to love you so sweet, the way kids love, the way I was supposed to. Then it turned greedy and true.

1. this is the last time / the national

when i lift you up you feel / like a hundred times yourself / i wish everybody knew / what's so great about you

Now everyone — the whole world, I guess — can see just what it is you’re made of.

2. a drop in the ocean / ron pope

i’m holding you closer than most / ‘cause you are my heaven

You’re especially heaven for a sinner like me.

3. smother / daughter

in the darkness i will meet my creators / and they will all agree / i’m a suffocator

They fucked me up, but I don’t ever wanna tell you just how bad. I won’t even now, don’t even want to think those things in your direction.

4. grand canyon / drive by truckers

it’s this life that we chose / that made it all worth living / through the horrors that life throws

So if we ever get out of this frozen wet hell we’re going out to the Grand Canyon. I tell you, I dream of the Grand Canyon.

5. is there somewhere / halsey

i try to refrain / but you’re stuck in my brain / all i do is cry and complain / because second’s not the same

She’s your true north. I know what that means, because you’re mine.

6. 10 am, gare du nord / keaton hensen

please do not break my heart / i think it’s had enough / pain to last the rest of my life

Stay for me. If you leave me alone in this world I’ll turn into something terrible.

7. robbers / the 1975

i’ll shoot him if that’s what you ask / but if you just take off your mask / you’d find out everything has gone wrong

Turns out that you’re still my favorite hiding place. Funny, too: turns out there are scarier things in the dark than vampires.

8. breezeblocks / alt-j

please don’t go / i’ll eat you whole / i love you so, i love you so

You make me hungry. You understand? You make me hungry.

9. heavy head / elder brother

don’t threaten me with better times / you ask me what our future holds / i’ll dig a hole and i’ll say let’s go

I should die out here. I’m the kind of guy who’s not meant to go back. I try to imagine a life after this and it just won’t come.

10. for me this is heaven / jimmy eat world

you can lose yourself in your courage / when the time we have now ends / when the big hand goes round again / can you still feel the butterflies? / can you still hear the last goodnight?

Right then I didn’t tell myself any stories. I was dying, and I was glad it was happening while I was next to you.

11. big black car / gregory alan isakov

love to just get into some of your stories / me in all my plain jane glory

I’m the story that’ll never get told, but that doesn’t bother me much. They’ll remember you, which is as it should be.

12. safe / the airborne toxic event

we can’t slow down now / this road’s not safe for driving

Some people are good at math and some people are good at art, but me, I’m good at shooting, and it scares me right to the bone the things I’d do for you.

13. i can feel your pain / manchester orchestra

‘cause i can feel your pain / in my bones, in my bones / and i can feel your pain / deep in my bones, deep in my bones

You look at me with those blue eyes all hot and electric in your face, blood on your cheek, soot smudged over your nose. Bone of my bones.

14. jesus christ / brand new

well jesus christ i’m not scared to die / i’m a little bit scared of what comes after

Hell is right here, and I’ve been damned for a long time.

15. the engine driver / the decemberists

and i am a writer, writer of fictions / i am the heart that you call home / and i’ve written pages upon pages / trying to rid you from my bones

You don’t need me. Doesn’t mean I’m not still afraid for you, not scared shitless that this world is gonna eat you alive.

16. samson / regina spektor

you are my sweetest downfall / i loved you first

But I loved you first.

17. second chances / needtobreathe

if time can break us, can it make us strong? / ‘cause seldom second chances come along

This story has been unbelievable and strange, but maybe this is the most unbelievable and strange part of all: I never forgot him, not really.

18. be the young (acoustic) / yellowcard

and i can’t believe my eyes / you are still here next to me / all i need, you’re all i see / in this life we hope to find

Even though I lost his specifics, his nose, his brow, I somehow knew that he lived safe and far away, and that knowledge alone was my comfort.

19. work song / hozier

no grave can hold my body down / i’ll crawl home to her

It’s why the grave couldn’t keep me in, sweetheart.

20. a way to you again / peter bradley adams

and every moment i thought of you / is written right there in my eyes / over and over / i got lost in my head / and i found the way to you again

I’ll always come back from the dead for you.