#good thing they both die horribly
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Brainrot sketches because I am VIOLENTLY ill
#my art#micolash host of the nightmare#laurence the first vicar#micolaurence#bloodborne#bloodborne fanart#doodles#sorry these are all sketches#these two weirdos are like chicken soup for my soul#anyway I hate them#good thing they both die horribly#I blame my mutuals
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i've had these scenarios written down since volo's debut in pokemon masters and i just really wanted to scribble them down and finally release them
#pokemon#volo#pokemon volo#pokemon jacq#n harmonia#pokemon rei#trainer rei#clai's art#trying to write n's specific brand of being mean is hard to me for some reason#in the initial idea i had him outright call volo stupid but i didnt know if that was too far so i just took it out BJFBFJF#but anyway volo being a historian who had to have studied many walks of life but has still come to the conclusion that the world is hopeless#jacq being someone who's very positive and sees the best in people even if they are very much not great to him (see: raifort)#finally realizing someone he knows is like. inexcusably horrible#n's situation wasn't even that different from volo's. both saw injustice in society and sought to change it#but even n. who hated humanity for what he thought they were all responsible for. didnt want humans to Die for what they did!!#and rei. rei was a scared kid who saw the very worst of volo firsthand. rei needed friends and one of them despised him in the end#isnt it soooo funny how volo thinks he's alone yet keeps pushing away all the people who want to connect with him :) i hate pla so much :)))#as another note too. perhaps the rei thing could end in two ways#satisfying good ending where it kicks off volo's realization that hey maybe people do trust me unconditionally#or no good bad ending where volo takes this as another betrayal. rei only liked him for his facade like everyone else so why does it matter#volo almost makes me feel as ill as n does. hate this stupid guy i shouldnt have bought pla for my birthday i should have gotten. p/kmin idk
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Y'know I kind of feel like when Megatron killed Tarn and said 'I want you to spend your final moments thinking of this: that everything you've done has been for nothing' he was kind of self-projecting onto Tarn? Mainly because at Megatron's statue, M and T had a conversation where Tarn explicitly asked if all the Decepticons in service to Megatron died for nothing, if HE did everything he did for nothing. (And I think M even gave an answer along the lines of 'idk I think we basically did'). And then after Megatron killed the DJD and Rodimus teleported in to rescue him, there was that silent moment where Megatron just stared at Rodimus not moving at all before he finally took his hand at the last moment.
It honestly feels to me like for a while, Megatron fully intended to murder-suicide himself. Murder the DJD, his monsters and his creation, and then take himself out alongside them, because he is also a monster. Because he also feels that everything he's ever done has been for nothing.
Goddamn it's no wonder I liked that scene so much LMAO, as someone who thinks villain Megatron > Autobot Megatron, literally one of his key traits is that Megatron basically took his pain/trauma/worldview and used it to lash out at the universe and try to subjugate it to his vision. So the fact that he took his own pain and brutally murdered the DJD while telling them the very same thing that puts him through so much agony is so very deliciously ironic. And a return, however brief, to the Megatron characterization that I know and love.
#squiggposting#i also feel like it turns his asshole behavior towards tarn into something more understandable#like... he is not just condemning tarn and co for being evil useless bastards#as if he has the moral high ground. no. megatron also thinks his whole life was wasted#for a moment he fully intended to kill all of the DJD and then himself. a circle of monsters#who all exist for no good reason and did horrible things for no good reason#only rodimus coming in is what saved megatron both literally and in a spiritual sense#from believing he deserved to just die in the same hellish pit he killed his creations in#THIS IS LIKE SOME FUCKING METAL ASS BIBLICAL SHIT I'M TELLING YOU#tbh if megatron had actually died in there with tarn and the djd i wouldve considered that#a more satisfying end to his story than what we got#particularly bc i think the functionist universe is stupid and LL 25 felt like. contrived#in how it dealt with Megatron's fate#anyways the TLDR is that megatron was an asshole to tarn as if he didnt make him how he was#but like during that one moment i think he was in a pit of self loathing#and he wanted to drag the djd. tarn in particular. along with him for ruining his happiness#i'm sorry but that's who megatron is#if your megatron isn't an intensely angry/damaged person who drags ppl down with him#bc of his own projection and self loathing then like. who is he#enough soft grandpa mtmte megatron i love violent unresolvable self hatred and lashing out megs
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God every day I think about Akane’s breakdown in door 3 because there really is no correct way to interpret that and every possibility makes me crazy. Like she sees this fucked up corpse whom Junpei (and the player, depending on how they play) believes is their friend Snake, but she knows that it’s Guy X. It’s a man she very intentionally put in the game for this very purpose, so that he could die horrifically and be displayed for everyone to see. And she has a full mental breakdown over being trapped in this room with the corpse, being trapped by Junpei, to the point where she rips out her hair and starts bleeding from how much she bangs on the door screaming to get out. And fuck, there’s so many possibilities like
Akane could be feeling genuine terror over the sight of the body, and with that remorse. She made this happen, she wanted this to happen, and now she’s forced to quite literally watch the damage she’s caused unfold. She can detach herself from his murder easily in other timelines where she doesn’t have to look at it, and she can sleep easy knowing that her hands are technically clean because she didn’t do the literal killing. But she can’t do that here, and she has to face the fact that not only did she happily cause this death, she failed her mission. She isn’t going to survive, and now this man is dead for nothing and everything is her fault
On the other hand, her entire breakdown could be completely fabricated in order to keep playing the role of the damsel in distress who is so innocent that the very sight of blood drives her to insanity. The interesting part about this is that if she could fake such a horrific breakdown, just how much of her personality a facade? We know she wants revenge, for everyone from Cradle to feel even an ounce of the pain she and so many others went through, but we don’t get to see the extent of how much she feels this way. We never hear directly from Akane about her feelings on any of the original organizers, just her note about her desire to punish them. She hates them, but does she see their deaths as a necessary evil, or does she feel joy and satisfaction at watching them go? It’s absolutely horrifying not knowing, not being able to see her true feelings, not knowing just how real or fake she is, the extent of her madness. Perhaps she doesn’t even know that herself
IN OTHER WORDS, it’s fucked
#zero escape#akane kurashiki#the truth lies somewhere in the middle im sure#but god both possibilities are so tasty#personally i think her reaction is fake to an extent like i think she does feel at least some joy over the murders#shes doing a good deed and ridding the world of evil#but i think that this is a rare moment where she actually thinks for a minute about what shes done and how its fucked#like shes never truly present in the moment she can never fully grasp the severity of the trauma#and i kinda want to believe that this route is a bit unexpected for her#like she had to have known it was a possibility but its entire existence relies on junpei betraying the others#and i think that she was ready to write it off as a rare possibility so she didnt worry about it too much#because the only thing holding junpei back from choosing door 3 is aoi saying that picking it would require leaving people to die#and akane has nothing but her trust that junpei is good and wouldnt do something so horrible to rely on#but then it happens and she cant handle the uncertainty she wasnt ready for ANY of this to happen#not only did junpei betray the others he betrayed HER in so many ways he doesnt realize#he did what he thought was good for june but its exactly the opposite hes not only damned her#but he trapped her in a room with the disgusting corpse that she put there and everything throws her off#and she has to confront that even junpei is unpredictable and is capable of evil and that she herself has fucked up so much#she cant escape this without literally STEPPING INTO the entrails of someone she killed#and its all just too much and she completely loses it#so yeah for me its less a mental breakdown cuz she feels bad for murder#but more a breakdown because shes been betrayed and caught off guard and has a brief realization of how terrifying her actions are#those may sound the same but they arent please guys please :(#as you can see im very normal about this and good god 999 is so fucking good
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I got multiple saves planned to romance the doc under various circumstances with various traits entirely because thats the most efficient way to learn abt a character in this game and the closest I can get to studying her under a microscope
#shes so fucked up. both of em are. but I find her so compelling and interesting because of that yknow?#I'm not even into women I just need to study her for science and media analysis purposes#and I really enjoy unpacking those kinda characters that like. do horrible things because they think its the least horrible options#incredibly fucked up characters who think they're doing the right thing; situations where there are no good answers#tragedies where an understandable bad choice leads to a death spiral. which if either of the kellys die is what ch4 becomes. tragic#scarlet hollow#Reese is also fun to me but he's like. catharsis interesting. sad little traumatized man interesting. not studyable; but observable
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one day i will properly compare dee made a smut film and ptsdee and the differences in the way they handle their very similar subject material but i have shit to do early tomorrow morning so. for now.
do you ever think about how RCG-written episodes, no matter how bad (both character morality-wise and writing-wise) they get, will always have a degree of humanity to them. like. 11x04 has dee doing something that is So incredibly wrong and horrible to dennis. but the reactions to it don't match its intensity. 12x07 again has dee doing something absolutely fucking deranged, and the gang tells her how fucked up it was. there's actually an acknowledgement both from her and from the others that what she did was awful, but her motivation, charlie, dennis, frank and mac's motivations throughout the episode make sense. dee's insecurity is the root of it, she can't handle being someone's "rock bottom", and she needs to prove that it can get worse. 11x04 dee just decides she's going to be a bastard and tell everyone that dennis was raped at 14. we don't know why she does this, and she really has no reason to, other than to be an asshole.
#cw rape mention#cw csa mention#ada speaks#i was like. lowkey sick to my stomach after smut film bc like. jesus christ#i think glenn's acting carried and many scenes in that ep live in my brain rent free#but ptsdee does what smut film did SO much fucking better in every possible way#like yes it had to be established previously to work#but. as an episode i just think smut film is extremely weak on the dennis and dee half of it#iconic episode for frank but jesus christ the contrast between both halves makes me die#rcg has always had this. 'yes these are terrible people but they Are People' vibe#that i think a lot of guest writers misunderstand#its not just a show about horrible people doing horrible things#its about those horrible people being UNAWARE of how horrible they are#they still believe they're Good. they are just unbelievably bad at being good.#like when the guys argue over whether or not they can call the israeli businessman 'the j word'#its about. the arbitrary rules they put in place. oh you cant call him a 'jew' THAT way. that's anti semitic bro.#they are capable of recognizing when something is fucked up and occasionally engage in self reflection#the thing is. theyre selfish. and they do it anyway.
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annoying to me that macOS by default hides the root directory from the user in finder. like i get that it's because most users never actually have to do anything with the root directory but come on man (<-complaining for no reason. it took like 0.02 seconds to pull up and pin the root directory to the sidebar in finder)
#i do question why the hell their file system explorer is called 'finder' though. like i don't think that's a very good name....#the good thing about having both linux & mac laptops is that transition is pretty seamless (at least for me) because they're both#unix-based machines (technically mac is Certified Unix while linux is unix-LIKE but it's a whole fucking thing i'm not getting into rn)#but i know some would argue that the transition is horrible because on linux everything is accessible and on mac you either abide#by apple's workflow or die. but for ME it's fine.#my mac is for school things i have to do that physically cannot be done on linux (i.e. test proctoring because they require either mac or#windows. nyeh nyeh whatever) and my linux laptop is for. Everything Else lmao#whatever i'm just rambling HAHA
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I was looking through my notes for Good Omens fanfiction, and realized almost every damn story includes Crowley having a baby.
There's the one where Heaven and Hell decide to use an angel baby carried by a demon as a diplomatic tool, leading into Crowley being protected by Michael, and them falling in love.
There's the one where she leaves her baby with Anathema and disappears, which triggers all the following events - from the search, to Aziraphale's trial, and everything else.
There's the one where she has to supply the new Antichrist, which leads to her and Lucifer falling in love, and her being crowned the Queen of Hell. (Well, this one is really two stories set in different timelines, in the second one the "baby" is like 27)
In the one inspired by a dream, she does have a baby eventually, but that's far from the worst thing that happens to her. Gabriel's treatment of her after is... How the Hell will I write this damn thing if I can't even think about it.
There's no baby in the one where she gets tortured with diluted holy water.
I see I have no storyline with male Crowley just yet... Fine, that's not true. I do have some thoughts for Crowley x Fem!Lucifer... It could include a new Antichrist, too. And, Crowley wouldn't be the pregnant one for once. But, dealing with pregnant Lucifer would probably be even scarier.
#diary pages#writing journal#fanfiction writer#ao3 writer#good omens fanfiction#good omens fandom#crowley#good omens crowley#lady crowley#fem!crowley#writers on tumblr#writer life#ffs what's with me and torturing miss/mr. snake#she's either pregnant or she's in some horrible situation or actually it's both#yes i feel damn guilty for doing that but i can't help it#in first two bullet points the dad is aziraphale but he screws up (without even knowing it) so michael steps in...#in the first one and not immediately as a love interest at first just as a protector#don't worry she's in on using the kid for politics and crowley know's there's drama#the second i'd rather not spoil because of the detective/investigation plot#hey but she chose michael herself she was supposed to be with hastur#in the antichrist one all is obvious and honestly it's one of those “good for her” stories for crowley#but in the time jump she is kind of riddled with worry for maxine fearing she'll burn out and so on#grr the dream storyline... the dad is gabriel and don't worry in the end she ditches him i can spoil that this story is so heavy#this story is the ugly crowing jewel of my frustration with crowley saving aziraphale over and over again#what she does to protect him here almost ends up killing her or breaking her it's... seriously no idea how i'll write it#i'm also worried people will think i'm romanticising it when it's supposed to leave the reader sickened like i am#no comment on the holy water thing rn it's a simple hurtfic that develops into a survivor - the previous one is survivor in the end too#i haven't given too much thought for the crowley/f!lucifer but it should be good#fr hell would be so frustrated she chose this moron as her king consort but could do nothing about it#her pregnant would be SCARY - she's terrifying already... well terrifying and to die for
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it is with a heavy heart that i report that cesare/volpe is doing it for me
#volpe is having his first and last good thing in life lol#it's volume 9/10 and they probs both gonna die soon but the dynamic compels me#that post that went like “please let me be your sword i'll be such a good blade i promise (begging like a dog)” but i also see you as#more of a concept than a human being and am generally here for my own weird ideology more than your wellbeing or happiness#mutual objectification. they're horrible#while cesare is like gay sex will not fix this and will probably make the situation worse but i feel like self-sabotaging so let's go#mari rambles
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…. Is their discourse over arti’s story with the scavs…???
#just saw a post that said people just 100% blame arti ??#idk I saw my mutual on that post and they made a rlly good point#it’s a tragedy on both ends. both sides are horribly at fault and there’s no right or wrong#..is that not obvious with this story?#rain world is pretty obviously a very harsh environment and it’s a kill or be killed world ig-I’m shot for referencing undertale#but it’s a harsh environment and things die. it’s not a kind world. but yeah it is at the same time. but arti experienced tragedy and she-#she acted upon her emotions. she let anger rage and hate consume her and look where that brought her#idk this might be incompressible I’m not trying to start anything#enbee.txt
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ngl to you guys I have started to feel consistently, really, legitimately physically ill reading news sites and I am uhhhhhh really fckn worried and also mad so lmao idk man
#I can't afford to leave the country so lol 🤷♀️ kinda just stuck here. which sucks. and has sucked for the last nearly decade now#I'm not having good feelings abt this rn tho and I'm ngl I fuckin hate any person who said anything like#omg dems have problems too so they're both bad!#like lmao go fuck urself.#we all have one safety net and one party is like yeah you can have that it's fine!#and the other party is like we wanna cut a hole in the net#but yeah. the same! the same!!!!!!#this shit makes me so mad cause.... overwhelmingly I know ppl in this country are like For Real Stupid.#I know this. I was born here. I'm gonna die here. I KNOW ppl here are STUPID as hell. and very easily distracted#by their ~feelings~ abt the ~economy~ and... you know..... racism#but the thing is I know 1000000% that a repub could come put tomorrow and run for prez and say#all birth control was illegal women could no longer vote and non whites would be deported#but as long as they said some vaguely strong arm shit abt money ppl would turn out in DROVES to vote for them#I just. I'm nit feeling good tonight. and I am getting a horrible migraine. and feel like I'm gonna hurl. all over. so lmao yeah 👍#erin explains it all
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Honestly a lot of my favorite horror ends up being games I 100% will never play and wouldn't enjoy playing, but that I managed to find someone who was able to convey enough to me to make me really care (though often leaving holes that I really want to fill but either can't sit through the whole playthough, or can't find the right playthrough, or... similar, you know?)
Dead Space, Marrow, Siren... all games I really like, games that have a lot (or uh... what's it called... Som... Sola... Signalis!)
But Dead Space I can't find the right playthrough, and Marrow I just crave something more from an imperfect game (video I watched is by doshdoshington)
Or supergreatfriend's playthrough of Siren is pretty much flawless... but... it's like 59 15-30mintue long videos, and the 60th explainer video is nearly 3 hours long on it's own... I always make it like 20 videos in before not being able to pay attention anymore
(Also like his playthrough of Deadly Premonition)
So you maybe see my problem, all these great pieces of horror I can really only engage with through these weird one off means that never quite leave me satisfied (like no way I'm beating MyHouse.WAD, I'm not even close to that good nor do I enjoy playing DOOM even if I respect it)
Love horror, just can't stand anything made in the genre because it all sucks and is boring and has stupid twists or pacing that annoys me and I hate everything about it except a few gems I can't interact with
But like I said, love horror
#mm tag so i can find things later#I'm just so so so so so so so so so so so so picky with horror#and it's not that my taste is objectively right; even though I am right about... mhh...#I'm right about things like shaky cam as a genre sucking not only cause of the way it's filmed but cause of the writing#but I'm not write about Saw being bland boring shit; that one's just a preference#like I know the first one's bold; and I'm not here to ruin other people's fun cause that's not an objective statement#but the difference is that the Saw movies might be well made and I can't tell; where as a lot of shaky cam are just trash#and oh how many movies have an interesting premise but have annoying 20 somethings#yes I would like to hear about Paris catacombs horror; and what a good title you have... why do your characters sound so annoying#first and foremost your characters must not annoy me#new Alien was good in part because only one character annoyed me; and while he got people killed he died#it's not that he deserved to die; but I was happy to be rid of him#and the original Alien is good because no one annoys me#that's not enough to make a movie good... but it sure is something that's probably true if I'm gonna like a horror movie#not based around something that could happen in the real world like a serial killer getting someone to let him spend the night#and people don't fucking annoy me... if you've done that... proceed and I'll take a look#but if you do the first one I'll take my leave without assessing your quality#and if you do the second one I won't even fucking watch you and if I do I'm almost certain to be bored and skip through you#conflict with the horror is so much more interesting to me than people being bitchy at each other#like Dead Space... that's different; unitoligists (for one thing; aren't a monolith; there's good people there) aren't catty#they're not annoying snippy little bitches who act like high schoolers#like yeah fuck that guy who made the regenerator both cause he's awful and cause that's a horrible enemy type#but at least he was just a crazy asshole with a civilized veneer and not an unstable 20 something that'll kill their friend with a rock#like you don't write all this stupid shit if you don't care about something#but I just have such trouble finding anything to enjoy in horror#love it though; really really do#oh add System Shock to the list of games I can't find a way to even get into; but really like and respect and wish I could
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Every now and then I get haunted by my past as a dr fan because someone mentions it or smth and lemme tell you the worst case scenario is if they bring up v3 in an even slightly positive light because nothing will make me start giving a shit abt dr again except for my burning hatred of that damn game, I just spent like 30 minutes ranting to myself about how much of a nothing character Kokichi is in the bathroom after showering just to vent it out because if I don't rant abt v3 every now and then I'll explode and kill someone
#rat rambles#like I generally think I had a lot of dogshit takes and sucked ass at au making and character analysis back in my dr days#but like I still stand by most of my gripes with v3 even if my old rewrite concepts also sucked#look man those were dark times my previous main interest was cr and the one before that was hs#also I had never actually posted about my thoughts before so I was a bit trigger happy with saying shit with my full chest#Im still prone to having bad takes on things to be clear even with oni I had a lot of bad takes when I first got into it#tbf I was mostly trying to talk myself down from going deeper but I evidently failed. hard.#but yeah I should delete my old fandom blog became every day I see my old dr posts get notes and I die a bit more#oh wait one dr rewrite thing I still stand by is my humam chiaki shit I was onto smth#like I still agree human chiaki should have never existed but I also think her existing as an individual who was wildly different from#ai chiaki is deeply interesting and also leaves space for some fun fucked up tragedy shit for both chiaki's#like I still like a lot of my old ideas for my rewrite of that stuff especially likey characterization was off for most of the cast but I#was cooking with the basic concepts and narrative I <3 taking characters that ppl idolize post their death and shifting the narrative to#show that they weren't a hero nor could they ever have been they were just some guy who went through horrible shit and died miserable#its one of my favorite things to do in fiction even now so ofc Im still fond of my older stuff with it on some level#like mannn why did I have to go so hard on what ultimately amounted to an au character and proceed to drop the ball on everything else lol#anyways I need to sleep before I start talking abt chiaki more yall dont need to see that <3#I mean hey could be worse. I could start talking abt my old cr stuff. we'd be here for at least a week straight#my old cr stuff was mostly actually pretty good it simply makes me sad because I put so much work and effort and made some fantastic#pieces of worldbuilding and character concepts for a mobile cookie game that sucks absolute ass#I ofc will still happily recycle concepts from my old cr stuff but like so much of it is just impossible to remove from context its so sad#ok ok gn for realsies this time
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Always felt like I missed out on my annabeth phase you guys, never once did I go through denial over Luke or be like “But he’s actually a good guy!!”
Nah, when it comes to Luke I got that Percy Jackson mindset
#like of course#as Percy came to see afyer some point#I saw how Luke was correct in some things#and how he WAS a kid who was used by the gods#but he’s also a horrible person???#like someone can be both a victim of the gods but also be a villain themselves#he is both#Luke is the child who was hurt again and again#but his hurt meant everyone else got hurt#his pain meant everyone had to suffer#he lost sight of what the original goal was long before Percy came around#no no because you know what??#the Luke that found annabeth and thailia would have NEVER tried to KILL Percy a little BABY A FETUS A CHILD#all because a freaking GOD needed him to (or something like that it’s been a minutes#but he Did he did and so from the BEGINNING luke had already lost sight that this fight of his was supposed to be to protect the kids like#him he had already failed in that manner#because he was willing to kill and let children die just like the gods#guys I actually adore Luke so much I wanna dissect his brain he’s so Interesting you don’t understand#he’s NOT a good guy and I love that about him#he is everything that can happen to any demigod after they are hurt and abused and used over and over again#he is the WARNING to the gods that if you keep#doing this they will#turn out Just Like You it not Worse#zeues dethrown WHEN Rick give it to me already#whatoh back at it again#pjo#luke castellan#anti luke castellan#(also luke kinda creeped me out after the weird annabeth crush of his like BRO????#Rick what was that why did that happen stop
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YOU SLEEPING ON A COUCH AFTER AN ARGUMENT 𓆝 ⋆。𖦹°‧
featuring. gojo satoru, geto suguru, toji fushiguro x reader
note. i hv so many ideas right now apart from what i'm actually supposed to be focusing on, so...pls excuse me.
GOJO SATORU. arguments with gojo are a pain in the ass, he's petty and everything will be a mess. he's so stubborn that it actually baffles you sometimes — and he calls you rock head?
being a sorcerer is never an easy job. gojo wakes up every day, not knowing whether he'd die in a mission or get to live another day. so when you brought up your concerns about it to him, the male didn't take it lightly. things have been tight for him, and you're walking on eggshells for the past few days.
the slightest thing angered him, like how his sleeve got stuck on the door handle, or the way he curses out loudly when he stubs his toe on the coffee table. it puts him in a shitty mood, so when that happens, and you try to talk to him about his job.
gojo gets very pissy about it.
frankly, you understood where his anger comes from. and it was part of your fault to bother him the moment he came back from work exhausted, it was bound to happen so you weren't really blaming him at all from the projecting of his anger to you the night before — he didn't say hurtful things, gojo knew better than that. all he did was tell you to leave him alone and get out of his sight for the night.
and you did. sleeping alone on the couch, all sprawled out, an arm dangling on the edge; while a string of drool dribbled down the corner of your lips.
you seemed to not mind having to sleep on the couch (under your own want). but your boyfriend did, the moment he knew your bed time strikes — he came out of the room and eyed your sleeping form. guilt washing over him when all you did was care about his being and how dangerous the jujutsu world is.
gojo approaches you and gently carried you in his arms, an arm right under your bottom and his other arm around your waist. hoisting you up like a baby as your cheek leaned onto his shoulder, letting the drool blotch his shirt. he doesn't care at all.
the male tucks you in the bed, pulling the covers over you before slipping next to you, chest pressed to your back and an arm resting on your hip. gojo will never let you sleep a whole night on the couch, he will bring you to sleep with him and apologize the very next day for being such an ass.
he also, tried to make it up to you by cooking a classic english breakfast. which ended up in chaos — and you both decided to order take out instead.
GETO SUGURU. geto is usually calm and collected; he doesn't really get angry at anything. even if he does, he mostly keeps it to himself unless it really bothers him. but since humans have certain capacities to their own emotion — geto is not spared from being angry, no matter how calm he is.
after the death of amanai, you could feel him change. your geto. it was traumatizing for him, and you understood. always being there for him, never leaving him alone. the dark circles under his eyes were apparent, and it looked like he hasn't had a good night sleep for what seemed like . . . weeks, or months, if that's even possible.
geto appreciated your company, really. but sometimes, he also wanted to be left alone to dwell on his feelings. he didn't want to end up saying hurtful things to you because he was so angry at himself. but he did, and god was it horrible.
he was already feeling like shit before the argument— which if you see, wasn't really an argument at all. it was one-sided, geto was telling you off and you didn't say anything back. because you knew he didn't mean it. he almost desperately begged for you to leave him alone because your presence was "annoying" him and he couldn't stand it.
although geto said it in a heap of moment. he didn't mean it, and before he could say anything else, you tell him that you were going to be sleeping on the couch, so if he needed anything he was free to come to you.
geto didn't stop you. he was busy hating on himself for telling you that — and believe me when i say that he, right there, almost cried out of frustration.
he tossed and turned on his bed. where you were usually on too, beside him, holding his hand whilst he sleep. your hushed voice lulling him into a peaceful slumber; but you weren't there today, all because he told you to leave him alone. geto sat up, his eyelids heavy, but no matter how long he shut is, they always open back up.
with slow and heavy steps, he approaches you on the couch. and geto had always knew that you were a light sleeper, so his footsteps awoken you. seeing your eyes flutter open, geto slid on the couch, laying himself on top of you — head on your chest, arms clutching onto your shirt like he's desperate for your presence, and his legs intertwining with yours.
getos' hushed apologies were heard as he leaned into your warmth, and you told him that you were never angry. brushing his hair, massaging his scalp using your fingertips before lulling him to sleep, and geto did. almost immediately. and so did you.
he could never sleep without you. whether it being on the bed, the couch, or anywhere else — as long has you were with him, he will find the ability to drift off.
TOJI FUSHIGURO. is an ass. let's face it — he wouldn't give a fuck if you decided to sleep on the couch after an argument, at least for the first couple of hours. toji is a blunt man, and he's a sole believer that nobody could bear sleeping on the couch when there's a bed in the house.
but you were there to prove him wrong.
after an argument going south, he finds you grabbing your pillow and then seeking shelter on the couch. and he clicked his tongue in annoyance, knowing you'd come crawling back on the mattress after a few hours — because who'd choose the couch over the bed?
you. apparently.
he slept without a single care, thinking of words to say when you finally decided to come back on the bed. but when he woke up at three am, his arm searching to find your body, but realizing all he was catching was air — he finally realized that you weren't coming back onto the bed.
and it annoyed him. he was angry that you weren't there. and at three am? he was already wide awake, walking out of the room angrily. but his gaze softened when he saw you asleep, the constant flashing light from the television panning on your body; toji walks over, snatches the remote and turns the device off.
letting out a soft sigh, toji squats down, flicking your forehead. and the action was enough to make you grimace lightly in your sleep — although not enough to wake you up completely. the male chuckled and prepped an arm under the hollow under your knees, and an arm across your shoulder.
with ease he brought you into your shared room and he laid you down on the bed, covering your body with the blanket before he slips into his own portion of the bed. scooting closer to you as you instinctively nuzzled into his chest, seeking for comfort.
toji wouldn't admit that he was the one who brought you into the bed and would end up saying how you came crawling back at three am. you always find out the truth though, and toji tells you to forget about whatever he did because he won't be doing it again (he will).
© CHURIPU 2024 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE
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Lickers from resident evil my new beloveds... my flesh puppies
#watched the first two movies today with my best friend :)#And as soon as I saw the flesh dog I was like ohhhh I want one I need a horrible fleshy friend#The way the film communicates the bond is a ‘master slave relationship’ which. ew. But. Imagine#Someone who loves their Lickers and protects them as hard as they protect him and it’s a natural symbiosis#Working as one entity#getting hurt when the other is hurt(which already seems to be implied. When dogs get struck the guy controlling them)#(Also seems to get hurt)#Also I just keep calling them flesh dogs or flesh puppies#I know now what their actual name is. But. Flesh puppyyyy#resident evil#But yeah just. My brain immediately said ok throw out the whole ‘flesh dogs are slaves to their human’ thing#And said ‘this is one bonded entity living off one another unable to exist without the other and also should be retooled into_#_a protective force for good since he has full control over them#For some reason it implied the guy would also turn infected?? But. He didn’t for like. The whole movie. After injecting the stuff#That connected him to the flesh dogs#So I... don’t get it. Is it because they all died? Did all the dogs die and that means he dies?#Whatever if it were my rules if all the dogs died he’d die and if he got like point blank headshot the dogs would just drop dead#But also like. When he feeds them both of their hungers are quenched#Loving them in turn fills you with the same sense of love you feel for it#You see. You see what I want. Guy who was infected with controlling flesh dogs virus to make it a good thing#Hell he was a teacher. Have the flesh dogs protect the classroom from another goddamn attack#or give ME a flesh dog and some dubious liquid to inject... it will work out I promise#👁👁flesh dog please? for me? Flesh dog for me to love and hold??#Feel the exact same way about trimmings from vita carnis btw. Hideous disgusting I want 27 of them#I love my horrible ‘unlovable’ creepy beasts that are actually harmless or even helpful#lion’s lair
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